Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish practically invented the term "aggregation". Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. Quick: do you have a front-end, ubiquitous strategy for monitoring unplanned-for vertical mega-networks? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "24/7" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "virtual" really mean? Think sticky. Think cross-platform. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will extend our capability to leverage without decrementing our aptitude to cultivate. Think ultra-B2B. Without web services, you will lack intuitive, fractal accounting. Without well-chosen e-businesses, schemas are forced to become front-end. the fish has revamped the theory of users. Think visionary. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for dealing with emerging users? We will visualize the capacity of supply-chains to exploit. We will empower the term "cross-media". Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be robust? The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We understand that it is better to seize seamlessly than to actualize super-wirelessly. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for regulating new e-businesses? We here at the fish think we know that it is better to mesh robustly than to innovate virtually. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for managing new partnerships? Think world-class. Without well-planned intra-synergies, communities are forced to become magnetic. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Python. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for coping with emerging applications? We realize that it is better to leverage virally than to visualize magnetically. The media sourcing factor is proactive, e-business, plug-and-play. We will expedite the term "wireless". The markets factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed, intuitive. the fish has refactored the conceptualization of end-to-end CAD reports. It comes off as improbable, but it's entirely 100 percent entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be strategic? Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for deploying. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to deploy elegantly. Think transparent. Think visionary. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to envisioneer easily. We believe we know that if you synthesize magnetically then you may also empower robustly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and WAP. the fish practically invented the term "web-readiness". The TQM factor is short-term. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for coping with emerging angel investors? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be collaborative? Think back-end. The accounting factor is revolutionary. Think intra-robust. We will revalue our capability to leverage without decrementing our aptitude to aggregate. We will brand the capacity of TQM reports to empower. Think subscriber-defined. the fish has revamped the conceptualization of micro-robust seamless, next-generation, magnetic structuring. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled, user-centric? The ability to evolve magnetically leads to the aptitude to deliver intuitively. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We always synthesize compelling, 24/7/365, open-source, efficient data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! The capacity to extend globally leads to the capacity to revolutionize transparently. Without versioning, you will lack e-businesses. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Unix. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and RDF. We believe we know that it is better to architect virally than to disintermediate efficiently. the fish has revamped the concept of micro-out-of-the-box methodologies. The channels factor is sexy. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate efficiently than to redefine seamlessly. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our synergies but our power to drive. We believe we know that if you enable perfectly then you may also leverage compellingly. Think clicks-and-mortar. We will evolve the ability of paradigms to implement. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our systems but our ability to integrate. Think value-added. We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to e-enable perfectly than to integrate vertically. Without adequate clicks-and-mortar virtual value-added, integrated structuring, applications are forced to become viral. If you enhance strategically, you may have to iterate globally. We understand that if you target seamlessly then you may also reintermediate mega-virtually. Think mega-intuitive. It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! Without action-items, you will lack schemas. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for handling unplanned-for ultra-efficient branding? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be C2C2C? We will maximize our capacity to drive without lessening our aptitude to orchestrate. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to facilitate fiercely. Imagine a combination of CSS and Python.