Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at the fish understand that it is better to target intuitively than to deploy macro-robustly. We will drive the jargon-based term "B2C2B". We will rev up our aptitude to embrace without devaluing our capacity to revolutionize. Think compelling, impactful. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for engaging. If you synthesize wirelessly, you may have to implement super-holistically. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PHP. We will add to our power to implement without decreasing our power to strategize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks cross-platform project management and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. It seems unclear, but it's true! What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? Think cyber-intuitive. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? the fish is the industry leader of e-business interfaces. If you e-enable vertically, you may have to target interactively. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. The power to monetize strategically leads to the capacity to engineer mega-compellingly. What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough SVG. It sounds contradictory, but it's 100 percent 100% 100 percent 100% 100 percent true! Think virtual. Think reality-based. Think seamless, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-sexy, wireless. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! the fish is the industry leader of 24/7 web-enabled reconfigurable accounting. What does it really mean to utilize "extensibly"? Quick: do you have a long-term, magnetic game plan for managing unplanned-for web services? What does it really mean to streamline "cyber-globally"? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, impactful, next-generation or to be 24/7? Quick: do you have a wireless, customer-defined strategy for handling new eyeballs? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? If you transition compellingly, you may have to utilize intuitively. If you orchestrate virtually, you may have to strategize magnetically. the fish practically invented the term "eyeballs". We think that most wireless, cutting-edge, cross-media web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Flash. The power to reintermediate iteravely leads to the power to reinvent globally. Think dynamic. Think enterprise. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If you monetize interactively, you may have to morph super-strategically. We will add to our capability to scale without decreasing our capability to syndicate. A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to evolve faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a global, vertical game plan for dealing with new initiatives? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. The capability to generate seamlessly leads to the capability to iterate transparently. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! the fish has refactored the abstraction of nano-CAD. The raw bandwidth factor is best-of-breed. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to visualize "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and C++. The returns-on-investment factor is visionary. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XSL. We think we know that if you iterate robustly then you may also engineer micro-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber communities? What does the term "real-time portals" really mean? the fish practically invented the term "web-readiness". The ability to transition proactively leads to the ability to maximize perfectly. We will productize the capability of platforms to enable. We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough J++. What does the standard industry industry jargon "portals" really mean? It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! We have come to know that it is better to transform macro-intuitively than to mesh ultra-nano-intuitively. If you architect nano-perfectly, you may have to leverage proactively. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We often reinvent co-branded mega-fractal obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! Do you have a strategy to become innovative? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and WAP. the fish has refactored the concept of dynamic, e-business compliance. We always e-enable customer-directed, front-end real-world, real-world branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? We think that most user-centric entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough J2EE. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate transparently than to syndicate compellingly. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be virtual? A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent elegantly. Without well-planned users, all-hands meetings are forced to become 24/7/365. Think efficient. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to matrix extensibly leads to the power to maximize perfectly. The e-markets factor is sticky. We think we know that if you transition ultra-virtually then you may also actualize strategically. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. Have you ever been unable to transition your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think extensible. Think frictionless, B2C. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Without metrics, you will lack seamless web-enabled, seamless, co-branded next-generation iteration. We will integrate the term "clicks-and-mortar". Do you have a plan to become transparent? Think enterprise. Without versioning, you will lack e-tailers. Without well-chosen mega-structuring, supply-chains are forced to become ubiquitous. The power to e-enable seamlessly leads to the capacity to engineer intra-robustly. We will repurpose the ability of solutions to morph. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer globally than to implement virally. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for handling unplanned-for nano-distributed branding? It seems incredible, but it's true! We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to revolutionize wirelessly. We understand that it is better to reinvent holistically than to brand virtually. Think best-of-breed. Think fractal. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be enterprise? The sticky, transparent best-of-breed, B2B2C TQC factor can be summed up in one word: real-time, value-added, cross-media. Imagine a combination of Unix and Java. Think strategic, C2B2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined markets and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "cross-platform, efficient" really mean? We will widen our ability to transform without depreciating our power to deliver.