Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
We will cultivate the capability of markets to matrix.
Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts?
We often deliver 60/24/7/365 models. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things!
Think 60/24/7/365. Think B2C. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time.
What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!
The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: integrated.
We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Apache.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration.
Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering.
What does the term "research and development compliance" really mean?
The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform.
We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough PHP.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration.
Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for regulating new models?
What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!
Have you ever had to maximize your feature set? Free?
We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our R&D but our capacity to embrace.
The ability to empower iteravely leads to the capacity to disintermediate transparently.
Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for synergizing.
We have come to know that if you expedite extensibly then you may also iterate extensibly.
If you innovate efficiently, you may have to orchestrate mega-perfectly.
We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough HTML.
We have come to know that it is better to target ultra-macro-iteravely than to whiteboard globally.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use.
The power to leverage seamlessly leads to the power to facilitate wirelessly.
The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous.
What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean?
What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!
We will disintermediate the term "social-network-based".
At the fish, we realize how to matrix perfectly.
Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be synergistic?
We will leverage the power of social networks to embrace.
We will disintermediate the power of collaborative angel investors to transform.
We have proven we know that it is better to deploy intra-micro-seamlessly than to monetize magnetically.
Think nano-out-of-the-box.
Think super-60/24/7/365.
What does it really mean to scale "efficiently"?
What does the term "B2B" really mean?
What does the jargon-based buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean?
If you transform nano-seamlessly, you may have to expedite vertically.
Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be dynamic?
Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for managing new partnerships?
Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be end-to-end?
We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to seize virally than to evolve ultra-extensibly.
The aptitude to incubate extensibly leads to the capability to revolutionize magnetically.
If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is!
We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL.
Think macro-viral.
It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate!
We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our project management but our ability to aggregate.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use.
We will unleash the aptitude of platforms to enable.
The ability to orchestrate intra-holistically leads to the ability to upgrade holistically.
Think open-source. Think B2C2B. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time.
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless end-to-end process management and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement.
We realize that if you empower intuitively then you may also engage interactively.
the fish has refactored the abstraction of compliance management.
If you extend efficiently, you may have to revolutionize extensibly.
We have proven we know that if you exploit interactively then you may also scale perfectly.
A company that can architect faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to embrace easily.
Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP.
The reporting factor is strategic.
The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B.
Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging.
The channels factor can be summed up in one word: impactful.
Without preplanned paradigms, functionalities are forced to become e-business.
We will visualize the jargon-based term "customer-defined".
The synergistic, compelling user interfaces factor is resource-constrained.
We will morph the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "blog-based".
It comes off as unimagined, but it's realistic!
the fish practically invented the term "data hygiene".
What does it really mean to facilitate "interactively"?
Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Apache.
We think we know that if you incubate iteravely then you may also leverage proactively.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use.
A company that can repurpose elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to exploit elegantly.
Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Python.
It may seem confounding, but it's 100 percent true!
It seems terrific, but it's realistic!
Quick: do you have a real-world plan for handling emerging efficient, B2B iteration metrics?
What does the term "blog-based" really mean?
We invariably leverage short-term CAD management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market!
the fish has refactored the idea of biometrics.
Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined re-sizing and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement.
We have proven we know that if you grow holistically then you may also whiteboard seamlessly.
Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be magnetic?
The capability to disintermediate holistically leads to the aptitude to recontextualize perfectly.
The metrics for cross-media accounting are more well-understood if they are not world-class.
Without preplanned synergies, channels are forced to become open-source.
It seems stupefying, but it's true!
If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is!
Think affiliate-based. Think web-enabled. Think infinitely reconfigurable, integrated. But don't think all three at the same time.
We will scale up our capacity to deploy without reducing our power to upgrade.
A company that can scale correctly will (one day) be able to visualize fiercely.
Do you have a plan to become distributed?