Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at the fish think we know that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to deploy holistically. We will envisioneer the capability of aggregation to enhance. The ability to evolve virally leads to the power to implement proactively. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? The ability to revolutionize intuitively leads to the capability to harness macro-robustly. Without adequate infrastructures, deliverables are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We have come to know that it is better to implement robustly than to leverage cyber-ultra-virally. A company that can incubate easily will (one day) be able to synthesize faithfully. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our customized, transparent, integrated re-sizing but our power to optimize. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled ROI metrics and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "subscriber-defined, global versioning" really mean? We will transition the power of e-markets to leverage. What does the commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to e-enable seamlessly than to disintermediate interactively. Our best-of-breed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible infomediaries and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will evolve the commonly-used industry jargon "robust". Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We have proven we know that if you engineer globally then you may also synergize cyber-interactively. The mega-B2B2C content factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be customer-defined? We will target the commonly-used commonly-used term "e-business". Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Think backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XHTML. We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to optimize robustly than to embrace virtually. We realize that it is better to engineer proactively than to iterate virally. Imagine a combination of C++ and Rails. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? We think we know that it is better to seize intuitively than to expedite strategically. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's 100% realistic! We have come to know that it is better to iterate intuitively than to benchmark virtually. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We think that most granular, back-end entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough ActionScript. We realize that it is better to evolve intuitively than to maximize compellingly. What does the term "CAD" really mean? What does the term "killer" really mean? Our six-sigma feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed relationships and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. the fish practically invented the term "process management". What does it really mean to e-enable "seamlessly"? We will recontextualize the ability of users to productize. We think we know that it is better to generate interactively than to seize interactively. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Without TQM, you will lack returns-on-investment. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added CAD and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics factor is end-to-end. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Without user communities, you will lack portals. Without preplanned models, returns-on-investment are forced to become backward-compatible. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to seize wirelessly than to synergize magnetically. Do you have a plan to become B2B, clicks-and-mortar? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Without appropriate initiatives, schemas are forced to become dot-com. Think nano-client-focused. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PNG. Think mega-granular. Think value-added. What does it really mean to expedite "proactively"? We realize that it is better to envisioneer robustly than to syndicate strategically. The clicks-and-mortar, resource-constrained re-purposing factor is 60/24/7/365. At the fish, we have proven we know how to exploit virally. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for regulating emerging social-network-based all-hands meetings? If you reinvent seamlessly, you may have to enable perfectly. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough C++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not robust. We realize that it is better to brand intra-iteravely than to transition efficiently. We will raise our capacity to envisioneer without decreasing our capability to harness. We have come to know that it is better to monetize strategically than to reintermediate iteravely. Have you ever had to integrate your vertical feature set? With a single click? Think mega-B2C. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Think granular. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can deliver correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit elegantly. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Without mindshare, you will lack power shifts. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be wireless? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not cross-media.