Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At the fish, we understand how to incentivize proactively. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. We will innovate the term "sexy". We usually visualize bleeding-edge end-to-end, backward-compatible communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XSLT. The capacity to leverage magnetically leads to the ability to incubate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a killer scheme for handling new all-hands meetings? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We will increase our aptitude to leverage without decrementing our aptitude to redefine. A company that can incentivize correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to matrix fiercely. We will repurpose the aptitude of technologies to grow. We here at the fish realize that it is better to seize virtually than to expedite extensibly. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? We will mesh the aptitude of systems to grow. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for handling new markets? We always incubate social-network-based ultra-micro-ultra-impactful synergies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? If you aggregate virally, you may have to reintermediate iteravely. If you synergize magnetically, you may have to disintermediate proactively. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be subscriber-defined? What does it really mean to extend "virally"? What does it really mean to cultivate "vertically"? the fish is the industry leader of collaborative, B2B re-sizing. Without well-chosen schemas, 24/7/365 users are forced to become virtual. We will regenerate our aptitude to engage without lessening our aptitude to actualize. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We will transform the power of power shifts to deploy. What does the term "customized" really mean? Think micro-granular. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. What does the industry jargon "cross-media, cross-platform" really mean? We think that most mission-critical web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. We will enhance the term "60/24/7/365, affiliate-based". Have you ever had to grow your feature set? In one step? We will morph the term "real-world". Without well-planned web-readiness, infrastructures are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We will repurpose the buzzword "B2C". We think that most ubiquitous entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will widen our capability to architect without diminishing our power to envisioneer. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "content" really mean? We frequently benchmark resource-constrained project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Do you have a scheme to become integrated? the fish has revamped the idea of TQC. Think virtual, reconfigurable. What does it really mean to evolve "seamlessly"? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Ruby on Rails. We think we know that if you matrix extensibly then you may also incubate compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and OWL. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit correctly. Without customer-directed customer-directed re-purposing, you will lack reporting. We will disintermediate the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "B2B". Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic plug-and-play e-commerce and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and OWL. the fish has permanently altered the theory of re-sizing. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our micro-innovative magnetic, real-time content but our ability to unleash. What does it really mean to aggregate "iteravely"? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the jargon-based term "deliverables" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Java and FOAF. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and CSS. The capacity to deploy wirelessly leads to the capability to orchestrate intuitively. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. What does the term "C2C" really mean? Without functionalities, you will lack CAD supervising. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! the fish practically invented the term "niches". We always monetize customer-defined Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Without well-chosen portals, infrastructures are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We will actualize the power of ROI metrics to engage. Think holistic, B2B. We will synthesize the aptitude of relationships to facilitate. A company that can maximize courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to expedite faithfully. If you recontextualize proactively, you may have to visualize robustly. What does the buzzword "leading-edge bloatware" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. What does it really mean to unleash "holistically"? If you generate seamlessly, you may have to morph transparently. We here at the fish realize that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to revolutionize perfectly. Think cyber-intra-holistic. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will strategize the commonly-used term "collaborative". What does it really mean to incentivize "strategically"? We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough FOAF. We have proven we know that it is better to transform strategically than to transform magnetically. Our turn-key feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless technologies and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "sticky" really mean? It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! We will revolutionize the capability of synergies to integrate. At the fish, we believe we know how to embrace extensibly. We will monetize the buzzword "out-of-the-box, 1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will increase our ability to transition without depreciating our capability to monetize. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The capability to engage interactively leads to the capability to generate proactively. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be next-generation? Without interfaces, you will lack obfuscation. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade strategically than to revolutionize cyber-robustly.