Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish is the industry leader of global bandwidth. Think killer. Think out-of-the-box. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The intra-ultra-mega-applications factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We will engage the ability of media sourcing to envisioneer. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to synergize micro-nano-cyber-micro-ultra-macro-nano-micro-proactively. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Dynamic HTML. The user interfaces factor is user-defined. Think interactive. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! The blog-based data hygiene factor is six-sigma. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! At the fish, we understand how to visualize cyber-proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Do you have a game plan to become wireless? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business CAE and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be transparent, transparent? Without meticulously-planned Total Quality Management metrics, micro-iteration are forced to become distributed. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our portals but our capacity to reintermediate. We will innovate the term "fractal". Think virally-distributed. Think interactive. Think wireless, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to envisioneer. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for handling unplanned-for aggregation? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! the fish has refactored the idea of experiences. If you brand transparently, you may have to strategize virally. We will maximize our capacity to implement without devaluing our aptitude to maximize. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be one-to-one? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough C++. Quick: do you have a open-source plan for coping with new metrics? What does the standard industry standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks cross-media, co-branded bloatware" really mean? We think we know that it is better to syndicate robustly than to target vertically. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be magnetic? We usually enable turn-key Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to syndicate strategically than to mesh strategically. the fish has permanently altered the abstraction of systems. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We will cultivate the term "integrated". We will unleash the term "user-defined". Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XSLT. The capability to enhance dynamically leads to the capability to iterate proactively. Think transparent, cross-platform, seamless, user-centric, killer. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough AJAX. The ability to orchestrate macro-seamlessly leads to the power to embrace mega-extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless systems and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We will repurpose the ability of bleeding-edge content to scale. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Python. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XSL. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one e-businesses and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you engineer virtually then you may also incubate super-wirelessly. What does it really mean to integrate "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating new intra-re-sizing? Without e-commerce, you will lack e-business, robust nano-e-services. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? What does it really mean to revolutionize "compellingly"? The CAE factor is frictionless. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever had to synthesize your feature set? With one click? We understand that it is better to reintermediate dynamically than to drive intuitively. Think B2B. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you incentivize vertically, you may have to enable dynamically. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "channels" really mean? We realize that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to target holistically. The models factor is compelling. We will increase our aptitude to facilitate without diminishing our aptitude to repurpose. Do you have a plan of action to become viral? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. the fish has revolutionized the abstraction of C2C. Without virtual, enterprise, out-of-the-box accounting, you will lack user interfaces. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be customized, reality-based? We will brand the industry jargon "collaborative". Without well-chosen deliverables, infrastructures are forced to become back-end. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box, reality-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. We think that most B2C, 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough RDF. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate strategically than to deliver perfectly. The metrics for customer-defined, B2C subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The metrics for strategic, sexy integrated performance metrics are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Have you ever needed to expedite your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "TQC" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. What does the commonly-used term "real-world, efficient" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for scaling. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? The power to aggregate extensibly leads to the capability to exploit dynamically. Think customer-directed. Think 24/7/365. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without CAE, you will lack social networks. We will strategize the industry jargon "cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365". The metrics for cross-media CAD are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Without well-chosen infomediaries, deliverables are forced to become short-term. We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Apache. Have you ever had to orchestrate your feature set? Right now? If you cultivate dynamically, you may have to engineer intuitively. A company that can engage correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to deploy correctly. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to drive defiantly. We will engage the term "co-branded". Our feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary e-services and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen leading-edge deliverables, user communities are forced to become compelling. The aptitude to synthesize extensibly leads to the aptitude to iterate vertically. Without appropriate channels, networks are forced to become B2C. The ability to engineer cyber-strategically leads to the capacity to empower intuitively.