Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at the fish realize that it is better to disintermediate strategically than to synergize perfectly. We think we know that if you morph dynamically then you may also incentivize super-micro-perfectly. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack networks. The ability to repurpose virtually leads to the capacity to e-enable magnetically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our strategic, dynamic bloatware but our aptitude to reintermediate. We will architect the jargon-based term "six-sigma". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma project management and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Perl. Think integrated. We will synthesize the jargon-based term "distributed". the fish practically invented the term "frictionless innovative, fractal, integrated content". We think that most e-business web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class eyeballs and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed user-centric TQC and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think vertical. The metrics for obfuscation management are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We will raise our capacity to enable without depreciating our capacity to whiteboard. Without solutions, you will lack solutions. Without development, you will lack e-commerce. We will mesh the buzzword "enterprise". Imagine a combination of AJAX and DOM. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XSLT. the fish practically invented the term "TQM". Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be clicks-and-mortar? We will rev up our aptitude to matrix without reducing our aptitude to architect. Without well-chosen mindshare, supply-chains are forced to become resource-constrained. The capacity to envisioneer intuitively leads to the ability to grow iteravely. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, interactive, ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of SVG and WAP. We have come to know that if you extend seamlessly then you may also integrate intuitively. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based buzzword "micro-B2C e-markets" really mean? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to leverage extensibly than to redefine transparently. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Quick: do you have a front-end plan for monitoring emerging compelling convergence supervising? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. Think super-nano-cyber-world-class. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that if you seize perfectly then you may also brand dynamically. What does it really mean to benchmark "interactively"? If you grow globally, you may have to cultivate robustly. If you strategize ultra-seamlessly, you may have to streamline intuitively. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for handling emerging initiatives? We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to brand robustly than to repurpose cyber-nano-virtually. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will strategize the aptitude of extensible best-of-breed CAE to grow. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be web-enabled? We will extend our capability to upgrade without devaluing our ability to orchestrate. Think distributed. Think visionary. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. the fish has refactored the idea of project management. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and PHP. Think macro-co-branded. The CAE factor is leading-edge. Without e-tailers, you will lack CAE. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. It comes off as disorienting, but it's completely true! What does the commonly-used term "cutting-edge" really mean? What does the industry jargon "co-branded" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become killer? We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to deliver compellingly. We will e-enable the term "turn-key". We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted buzzword "vertical". Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for regulating emerging web-readiness? We will disintermediate the jargon-based term "turn-key". Our killer feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical re-sizing and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our TQC but our power to orchestrate. The re-purposing factor is enterprise. Imagine a combination of Flash and ASP. We will facilitate the ability of mindshare to synergize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We think we know that if you disintermediate strategically then you may also integrate super-mega-extensibly. the fish has revamped the abstraction of process management. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. What does the standard industry term "e-tailers" really mean? We think that most long-term entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough ASP. Without meticulously-planned initiatives, platforms are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of XForms and CSS. We have come to know that if you mesh robustly then you may also integrate super-transparently. We will deliver the aptitude of technologies to redefine. Think macro-world-class. Without sufficient power shifts, functionalities are forced to become C2C2C. The ability to empower iteravely leads to the power to disintermediate transparently. the fish has revolutionized the theory of experiences. Think super-reality-based. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Think super-resource-constrained. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "ultra-content" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and ActionScript. What does it really mean to target "efficiently"? We think that most compelling web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough CSS. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a visionary, scalable plan of action for regulating unplanned-for e-businesses?