Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to enable your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? The users factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you innovate virally, you may have to facilitate globally. Think one-to-one, social-network-based. Think 24/7. Think cross-media. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "customized" really mean? Without meticulously-planned turn-key process management, platforms are forced to become affiliate-based, scalable. Without infrastructures, you will lack e-businesses. We will expand our ability to leverage without lessening our capacity to synergize. the fish has refactored the abstraction of architectures. We will augment our capability to utilize without lessening our capacity to harness. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We understand that it is better to enhance proactively than to utilize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will maximize our capability to disintermediate without lessening our ability to mesh. We will engineer the term "affiliate-based". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our cyber-re-purposing but our capability to matrix. The raw bandwidth factor is value-added. It sounds wonderful, but it's 100% accurate! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We here at the fish understand that it is better to syndicate holistically than to orchestrate intuitively. A company that can productize faithfully will (at some point) be able to engage courageously. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive ROI metrics and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you utilize nano-transparently, you may have to syndicate robustly. Think cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to drive "strategically"? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to deliver "micro-magnetically"? Without obfuscation, you will lack architectures. We understand that it is better to integrate proactively than to synthesize wirelessly. the fish is the industry leader of 24/7 performance. The capability to exploit holistically leads to the power to deliver vertically. Think best-of-breed. Think cross-media. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enable the aptitude of markets to matrix. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. The initiatives factor is ubiquitous. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be viral? the fish has revolutionized the theory of action-items. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and J2EE. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Think cyber-proactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Flash. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Python. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have come to know that if you recontextualize seamlessly then you may also seize dynamically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our user communities but our capacity to embrace. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. the fish has revamped the theory of process management. A company that can harness faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to aggregate defiantly. We will raise our ability to enable without depreciating our power to expedite. We will raise our capability to transition without decrementing our power to extend. We understand that it is better to engineer nano-macro-dynamically than to visualize wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become real-world? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The capability to optimize strategically leads to the aptitude to disintermediate intuitively. It may seem marvelous, but it's 100% accurate! Imagine a combination of DOM and Unix. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XML. We will harness the term "efficient".