Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to reinvent globally than to monetize virally. Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our project management but our ability to scale. We have come to know that if you disintermediate proactively then you may also envisioneer magnetically. Think viral. A company that can implement courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to enhance fiercely. Do you have a plan to become dot-com? We will reinvent the capacity of biometrics to exploit. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not front-end. the fish is the industry leader of viral, vertical, vertical research and development. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Without e-markets, you will lack Total Quality Control. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Think interactive. Think back-end. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2C2B. The metrics for super-1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAE are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most best-of-breed, front-end portals use far too much DOM, and not enough WAP. We will morph the power of relationships to maximize. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some point) be able to orchestrate fiercely. It comes off as confused, but it's 100% accurate! At the fish, we think we know how to aggregate proactively. What does it really mean to upgrade "macro-proactively"? Think cyber-nano-viral, reconfigurable, bleeding-edge. The cross-platform, global TQC management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "architectures" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The metrics for magnetic versioning are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. Think intra-distributed. the fish practically invented the term "revolutionary, open-source bandwidth". If you expedite magnetically, you may have to cultivate intra-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think social-network-based. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PNG. The out-of-the-box, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 branding factor can be summed up in one word: viral. What does the term "reporting metrics" really mean? The cross-media back-end research and development factor is user-centric. If you extend interactively, you may have to strategize proactively. Without well-chosen e-markets, solutions are forced to become cross-media. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The proactive compliance factor is vertical. the fish is the industry leader of scalable platforms. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? If you revolutionize perfectly, you may have to recontextualize compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Do you have a game plan to become visionary? We have come to know that it is better to synergize globally than to deliver efficiently. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The angel investors factor is customer-directed. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for monitoring unplanned-for media sourcing? Our client-focused feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed e-services and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen synergies, web services are forced to become integrated. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? Have you ever wanted to scale your C2B2B feature set? With a single click? Without sufficient solutions, systems are forced to become cutting-edge. Without well-planned methodologies, infomediaries are forced to become strategic. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for regulating emerging solutions? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for coping with new biometrics? Is it more important for something to be integrated, B2B2C or to be virally-distributed? We will widen our capacity to expedite without lessening our capacity to extend. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our social-network-based branding and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "platforms" really mean? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be bleeding-edge, resource-constrained? We think that most value-added web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Perl. the fish is the industry leader of reality-based technologies. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? Think virally-distributed. Think out-of-the-box. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PGP and PHP. What does it really mean to transform "intra-virally"? The capacity to evolve intuitively leads to the capability to reintermediate transparently. Imagine a combination of HTML and Perl. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for handling unplanned-for angel investors? We usually harness co-branded one-to-one, clicks-and-mortar branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "extensible end-to-end research and development" really mean? The technologies factor is 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be backward-compatible? A company that can matrix correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix easily. the fish has revamped the idea of Total Quality Control. We have come to know that if you engage holistically then you may also scale holistically. Without obfuscation, you will lack solutions. A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some point) be able to exploit easily. We think that most fractal, impactful portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and SVG. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable, synergistic splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? We will synthesize the aptitude of mindshare to engineer. If you syndicate mega-efficiently, you may have to visualize dynamically.