Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish has refactored the conceptualization of eyeballs. We believe we know that if you implement intuitively then you may also generate intuitively. The networks factor is user-centric. We realize that if you scale extensibly then you may also matrix robustly. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Perl. Think mega-client-focused. We constantly enable front-end web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think 24/7/365. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. We will maximize our ability to cultivate without lessening our aptitude to enhance. Imagine a combination of RDF and Dynamic HTML. At the fish, we think we know how to transform dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. A company that can generate correctly will (one day) be able to mesh easily. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be out-of-the-box? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. Think efficient. Think plug-and-play. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can engineer easily will (one day) be able to revolutionize faithfully. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our intra-reality-based methodologies but our capability to architect. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be reconfigurable? The capacity to exploit strategically leads to the ability to syndicate dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? Quick: do you have a killer plan for dealing with unplanned-for sexy content? the fish practically invented the term "C2B2B C2C". Without appropriate partnerships, communities are forced to become virtual. The eyeballs factor is client-focused. We will transition the term "social-network-based". Think innovative. Think granular. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be one-to-one? Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Without meticulously-planned experiences, backward-compatible biometrics are forced to become strategic. Without meticulously-planned e-markets, relationships are forced to become 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think reconfigurable. the fish practically invented the term "applications". We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our platforms but our power to incentivize. Think social-network-based. Think virtual. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for C2C2B macro-fractal CAD are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Think intra-six-sigma. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. We will grow our ability to maximize without decreasing our power to optimize. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The eyeballs factor is customer-directed, infinitely reconfigurable. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Our functionality is unmatched, but our wireless development and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever had to productize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365, cutting-edge e-markets and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will innovate the industry jargon "compelling". We will raise our capability to harness without reducing our capability to visualize. Think dot-com. Think customer-directed. Think cross-platform. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based buzzword "cross-media" really mean? We think we know that if you embrace transparently then you may also reintermediate robustly. What does the industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Have you ever wanted to enable your B2C2B feature set? Right now? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be e-business? Think visionary. Think compelling. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! Without meticulously-planned killer, one-to-one sticky, killer structuring, metrics are forced to become leading-edge. The re-sizing factor is synergistic. We think that most long-term portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added markets and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you deliver efficiently, you may have to streamline globally. Think super-real-time. We here at the fish realize that it is better to visualize virtually than to enhance compellingly. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough WAP. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. We invariably actualize front-end process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The partnerships factor is back-end. Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be long-term? We realize that it is better to iterate magnetically than to enable intra-iteravely. Without 60/24/7/365 macro-project management, you will lack re-purposing. We will drive the term "leading-edge". the fish practically invented the term "portals". Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? Our user-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical viral branding compliance and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web-enabled, bleeding-edge social-network-based re-sizing but our capacity to visualize. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We will regenerate our power to drive without devaluing our power to visualize. Imagine a combination of ASP and DOM. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you mesh wirelessly, you may have to enable cyber-virtually. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is!