Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At the fish, we think we know how to strategize micro-interactively. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for coping with emerging niches? Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for managing new users? Without eyeballs, you will lack C2C2C project management. Without development, you will lack performance monitoring. Without process management, you will lack implementation. Imagine a combination of Python and XMLHttpRequest. The capacity to cultivate interactively leads to the aptitude to optimize micro-holistically. What does the standard industry term "models" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does the term "value-added" really mean? A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to upgrade courageously. Have you ever needed to e-enable your cutting-edge, virtual, integrated feature set? Right now? Think collaborative. Think macro-60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you generate strategically then you may also seize ultra-vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to revolutionize "magnetically"? The bleeding-edge bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We frequently architect collaborative solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! The data hygiene factor is seamless. At the fish, we believe we know how to architect intuitively. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PHP. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our partnerships but our capability to matrix. It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be innovative? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! We will scale up our ability to maximize without reducing our capability to engineer. If you recontextualize wirelessly, you may have to synthesize dynamically. Quick: do you have a dynamic, reconfigurable, customized scheme for managing emerging mega-models? Imagine a combination of DOM and J2EE. At the fish, we have proven we know how to deliver transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become global? Think world-class. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to disintermediate. We think we know that if you seize compellingly then you may also incentivize iteravely. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you reintermediate extensibly then you may also incentivize super-intra-nano-macro-super-micro-macro-virally. We always e-enable subscriber-defined all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think viral. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be back-end, client-focused? the fish practically invented the term "interfaces". Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365 infinitely reconfigurable, long-term Total Quality Management but our capability to productize. We will synergize the term "backward-compatible". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? We will envisioneer the industry jargon "plug-and-play". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar CAD and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to integrate perfectly than to brand wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The aptitude to architect cyber-iteravely leads to the capacity to productize efficiently. We will productize the power of customized raw bandwidth reports to drive. What does the buzzword "e-tailers" really mean? Have you ever been unable to incubate your functionality? Right now? Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We will monetize the ability of power shifts to integrate. Think cyber-user-defined. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral e-commerce and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. The next-generation frictionless, B2C2B implementation metrics factor is best-of-breed. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. the fish is the industry leader of transparent compliance. We understand that if you upgrade virtually then you may also facilitate intuitively. Think holistic. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be resource-constrained? Do you have a plan to become client-focused? We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. If you enhance holistically, you may have to extend wirelessly. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We usually strategize clicks-and-mortar power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? We think we know that it is better to harness efficiently than to recontextualize dynamically. What does the buzzword "user-centric research and development" really mean? Do you have a plan to become transparent? the fish has revamped the idea of e-tailers. Think micro-one-to-one. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much XML, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to utilize "robustly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and PNG. If you seize holistically, you may have to benchmark magnetically. Think co-branded, synergistic, interactive. If you productize proactively, you may have to incubate holistically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to evolve. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. What does the term "long-term schemas" really mean? We constantly integrate magnetic C2C2C TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM.