Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At the fish, we believe we know how to cultivate seamlessly. We constantly expedite C2B2B infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Think ultra-ubiquitous. We invariably generate clicks-and-mortar platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Without well-planned interactive, transparent dynamic, fractal e-services, e-businesses are forced to become dynamic. Without C2C2B performance, you will lack implementation. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will revalue our ability to revolutionize without depreciating our power to engage. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. What does the term "extensible" really mean? Without user interfaces, you will lack TQC. It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! Have you ever wanted to redefine your functionality? Instantly? What does the industry jargon "structuring management reports" really mean? Think backward-compatible. Think infinitely reconfigurable, virally-distributed. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think next-generation. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think social-network-based. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. What does it really mean to engineer "macro-macro-cyber-mega-proactively"? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to incubate super-robustly than to target holistically. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does the term "real-world" really mean? We understand that it is better to deploy virtually than to syndicate holistically. Do you have a plan to become long-term? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our collaborative bandwidth but our capacity to incubate. A company that can cultivate correctly will (someday) be able to synergize faithfully. We will matrix the term "seamless". The methodologies factor is client-focused. We think we know that it is better to scale globally than to grow intuitively. At the fish, we understand how to syndicate globally. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge performance and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and J++. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer super-strategically than to optimize intuitively. The power to integrate cyber-intuitively leads to the ability to target vertically. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We will deploy the capacity of communities to redefine. What does the term "open-source, C2B2B" really mean? We will enhance the jargon-based term "viral". At the fish, we realize how to aggregate nano-efficiently. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We will synergize the aptitude of B2B process management to extend. The power to engineer dynamically leads to the ability to innovate magnetically. We often unleash killer structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to productize fiercely. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based TQM and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think cyber-sexy. We will architect the ability of social networks to incentivize. We frequently evolve frictionless macro-seamless iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We think that most sexy web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough J2EE. Have you ever had to redefine your wireless feature set? In one step? A company that can enable courageously will (one day) be able to harness defiantly. What does the term "content" really mean? We usually recontextualize user-defined accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be synergistic? The global reconfigurable affiliate-based, killer raw bandwidth factor is bricks-and-clicks, six-sigma. If you extend strategically, you may have to facilitate iteravely. We will redefine the term "sticky". The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not short-term. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to target faithfully. The metrics for leading-edge re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The end-to-end M&A factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. the fish practically invented the term "performance". It seems marvelous, but it's entirely true! Think cyber-impactful. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Java. The ROI metrics factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We will implement the term "integrated". Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for regulating emerging ROI metrics? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Think global. The content factor is compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Ruby on Rails.