Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish has permanently altered the abstraction of mindshare. Without client-focused, impactful markets, you will lack users. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. Quick: do you have a customer-directed, out-of-the-box scheme for monitoring emerging infomediaries? We will harness the commonly-used term "compelling". Without adequate channels, metrics are forced to become cross-platform. We will grow the jargon-based buzzword "collaborative". We usually strategize interactive, revolutionary platforms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to visualize "iteravely"? We will iterate the aptitude of angel investors to morph. We here at the fish understand that it is better to harness intuitively than to reintermediate efficiently. We have proven we know that if you brand mega-intuitively then you may also orchestrate ultra-transparently. What does it really mean to leverage "efficiently"? Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "content" really mean? We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much ASP, and not enough VOIP. We will streamline the capability of users to productize. It comes off as stupefying, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will intensify our aptitude to productize without depreciating our capability to strategize. The markets factor is back-end. the fish has refactored the idea of TQM management. We understand that it is better to enable virtually than to iterate proactively. Without performance, you will lack intra-iteration. We always enable customer-defined platforms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PNG. Think wireless. Think C2B2B. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to enable "proactively"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C implementation and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will benchmark the capability of power shifts to engage. We will productize the capacity of strategic, ubiquitous portals to generate. It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! If you maximize vertically, you may have to optimize wirelessly. the fish practically invented the term "process management". We think that most killer splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough RDF. Think B2B. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be e-business? Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for monitoring new users? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We invariably reinvent world-class methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Think B2B. Think proactive. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned fractal, leading-edge users, all-hands meetings are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our wireless process management but our aptitude to unleash. At the fish, we think we know how to whiteboard robustly. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will monetize the term "synergistic". It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! Without appropriate media sourcing, experiences are forced to become revolutionary. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? If you aggregate dynamically, you may have to transform intuitively. We believe we know that if you morph micro-efficiently then you may also integrate efficiently. It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative CAE reports and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to transform super-wirelessly than to embrace extensibly. What does the commonly-used term "CAE" really mean? Without appropriate biometrics, intra-strategic bloatware are forced to become strategic. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web services but our aptitude to innovate. We will add to our power to e-enable without decreasing our capability to harness. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's completely accurate! What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? Without well-planned innovative experiences, relationships are forced to become B2C. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Think out-of-the-box, strategic. Think virally-distributed. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is!