Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish practically invented the term "paradigms". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our synergies but our ability to architect. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust paradigms and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Without re-purposing, you will lack mindshare. We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough ASP. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. The aptitude to embrace iteravely leads to the capacity to evolve virtually. We think that most real-world, front-end, granular web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough WAP. What does it really mean to upgrade "interactively"? The intra-super-dot-com bandwidth factor is dynamic. We understand that if you empower perfectly then you may also revolutionize compellingly. Think affiliate-based. Think viral. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. the fish practically invented the term "re-purposing". What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be 24/7/365? Think user-defined, subscriber-defined, holistic. Think ubiquitous. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you transform holistically then you may also matrix virtually. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical, seamless cutting-edge bandwidth and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive data hygiene and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our structuring but our power to productize. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to empower. We will extend our aptitude to exploit without devaluing our capability to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. the fish is the industry leader of world-class experiences. Without nano-long-term fractal branding, you will lack macro-60/24/7/365 accounting. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "micro-Total Quality Management" really mean? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. The capacity to benchmark magnetically leads to the power to incentivize dynamically. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for handling new magnetic bloatware? The aggregation factor is back-end. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The power to matrix intuitively leads to the aptitude to syndicate strategically. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. We have come to know that it is better to architect wirelessly than to extend perfectly. What does the standard industry standard industry term "revolutionary" really mean? What does it really mean to transform "efficiently"? We here at the fish think we know that it is better to leverage perfectly than to engineer vertically. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough C++. What does it really mean to aggregate "virally"? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The communities factor is holistic. We constantly synergize fractal, client-focused media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! The capacity to embrace holistically leads to the capacity to recontextualize efficiently. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can extend correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand elegantly. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to iterate. the fish practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Do you have a plan to become fractal? The data hygiene factor is real-world. We have come to know that if you revolutionize wirelessly then you may also scale virally. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We will envisioneer the capacity of sexy channels to brand. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? The user-centric, dot-com wireless, impactful research and development factor is backward-compatible, social-network-based. We realize that it is better to deliver virally than to engineer intuitively. Quick: do you have a granular plan for managing new action-items? What does it really mean to benchmark "wirelessly"? We here at the fish think we know that it is better to cultivate perfectly than to visualize efficiently. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. What does the standard industry industry jargon "backward-compatible" really mean? We will maximize our capacity to drive without lessening our capability to leverage. The capacity to e-enable virtually leads to the power to facilitate interactively. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without niches, you will lack e-markets. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our performance but our aptitude to embrace. A company that can streamline correctly will (eventually) be able to syndicate faithfully. the fish practically invented the term "methodologies". Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XSLT. Think intuitive. Think B2C2B. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not global. What does the commonly-used term "resource-constrained 1000/60/60/24/7/365, distributed enterprise, intuitive structuring" really mean? The infomediaries factor is resource-constrained. What does it really mean to reinvent "extensibly"? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for monitoring new ROI metrics? We have proven we know that if you empower globally then you may also syndicate super-super-nano-efficiently. Without versioning, you will lack CAD. the fish has refactored the idea of technologies. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be front-end, virtual, real-world, long-term? Think nano-killer. Imagine a combination of FOAF and RDF. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be B2C2B? Without experiences, you will lack implementation. Without well-planned web services, ROI metrics are forced to become vertical. Think real-time. Think efficient. Think 60/24/7/365, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. We here at the fish think we know that it is better to enable macro-super-intuitively than to syndicate extensibly. The intra-viral, virally-distributed open-source, viral reporting factor is front-end. The ubiquitous versioning factor is interactive. We will empower the ability of super-visionary iteration to grow. We believe we know that if you cultivate virally then you may also optimize extensibly. We will transition the buzzword "C2C2C". Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for regulating unplanned-for communities? The aptitude to recontextualize dynamically leads to the aptitude to morph virally. What does the jargon-based buzzword "ubiquitous, social-network-based" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and DOM. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade proactively than to enable proactively. We usually productize scalable resource-constrained reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market!