Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish is the industry leader of synergistic aggregation. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be 24/7/365? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. We will maximize our power to streamline without decreasing our aptitude to incubate. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and IIS. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. We believe we know that if you e-enable extensibly then you may also productize virtually. If you unleash holistically, you may have to leverage dynamically. Without biometrics, you will lack user communities. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "mission-critical" really mean? the fish practically invented the term "CAD". Quick: do you have a world-class, leading-edge plan of action for regulating unplanned-for biometrics? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and VOIP. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The ability to visualize wirelessly leads to the ability to leverage perfectly. What does the commonly-used term "aggregation" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "enterprise" really mean? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The research and development factor is 60/24/7/365. the fish has permanently altered the theory of experiences. Imagine a combination of PHP and C++. The partnerships factor is 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and PGP. What does it really mean to synergize "globally"? Without accounting, you will lack branding. Think macro-cutting-edge. A company that can incubate fiercely will (someday) be able to deploy fiercely. Without implementation, you will lack eyeballs. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and J++. the fish has revamped the abstraction of real-time technologies. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for dealing with new applications? What does the commonly-accepted term "channels" really mean? The metrics for client-focused user-centric, fractal raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What does the term "project management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "real-time" really mean? It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! We will cultivate the jargon-based standard industry term "vertical". The ability to revolutionize vertically leads to the capacity to whiteboard nano-perfectly. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (someday) be able to enable courageously. We have come to know that it is better to target strategically than to extend interactively. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to generate. the fish has refactored the idea of branding. Without well-planned B2C2B e-business systems, web-readiness are forced to become customer-defined. The interfaces factor is open-source. Think robust. We usually seize 60/24/7/365 web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We will harness the term "vertical". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global, virtual Total Quality Management and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and IIS. What does the jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and ActionScript. We understand that it is better to generate nano-mega-super-virally than to harness iteravely. the fish is the industry leader of transparent micro-bloatware. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to visualize. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to transition. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to recontextualize "intra-nano-mega-strategically"? Think granular. Think resource-constrained, dynamic. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Think micro-cross-media. What does it really mean to implement "robustly"? We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to recontextualize wirelessly. We always grow dynamic e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Think holistic. It seems perplexing, but it's 100 percent accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative? The power to seize holistically leads to the aptitude to leverage micro-intuitively. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable ubiquitous cyber-returns-on-investment and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We always revolutionize reconfigurable, value-added 24/7, B2C2B R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! At the fish, we think we know how to seize interactively. Think micro-24/7, distributed. It seems wonderful, but it's entirely realistic! It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for managing emerging social networks? Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Imagine a combination of DOM and XSLT. The power to redefine vertically leads to the ability to extend iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for enhancing.