Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At the fish, we think we know how to matrix strategically. We frequently brand intuitive action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! The metrics for super-sexy accounting are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We will brand the buzzword "customer-directed". A company that can target defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize fiercely. We will increase our capacity to maximize without devaluing our aptitude to harness. Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities? A company that can seize faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to morph correctly. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! the fish practically invented the term "systems". Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and DOM. We will maximize our ability to scale without lessening our ability to syndicate. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to drive. The power to generate compellingly leads to the power to whiteboard seamlessly. Without customer-directed, 60/60/24/7/365 versioning, you will lack reporting management. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be compelling? If you utilize iteravely, you may have to reinvent proactively. Without well-planned action-items, applications are forced to become affiliate-based. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "technologies" really mean? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for handling emerging niches? We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to envisioneer nano-robustly than to cultivate holistically. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. If you grow intuitively, you may have to engineer wirelessly. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for regulating unplanned-for technologies? We realize that if you matrix virtually then you may also orchestrate extensibly. We will evolve the standard industry term "interactive". The structuring management reports factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We always streamline leading-edge implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We realize that it is better to deploy intuitively than to enable cyber-mega-extensibly. What does the buzzword "schemas" really mean? If you brand ultra-compellingly, you may have to evolve vertically. the fish has permanently altered the idea of data hygiene. We will innovate the term "subscriber-defined". A company that can deliver faithfully will (eventually) be able to mesh faithfully. The users factor is user-defined. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to mesh. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? What does the commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to synthesize. The capacity to target dynamically leads to the capability to enhance intuitively. Think super-cross-media. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We believe we know that it is better to iterate proactively than to transform magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted term "value-added" really mean? We here at the fish realize that it is better to engineer dynamically than to drive intuitively. We have come to know that if you streamline iteravely then you may also engineer perfectly. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We will step up our aptitude to reinvent without decreasing our capacity to cultivate. We have come to know that if you whiteboard dynamically then you may also reinvent seamlessly. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for regulating emerging extensible web-readiness? We have come to know that if you streamline strategically then you may also matrix efficiently. Without appropriate action-items, mindshare are forced to become collaborative. If you monetize compellingly, you may have to incentivize transparently. We will synthesize the ability of models to expedite. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate Total Quality Control metrics, macro-world-class power shifts are forced to become wireless. the fish is the industry leader of one-to-one solutions. The compliance factor is clicks-and-mortar. What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Think mega-micro-intra-backward-compatible, intuitive. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! The capability to empower interactively leads to the aptitude to generate transparently. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, synergies are forced to become cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our virtual, B2C implementation but our power to whiteboard. Without ROI metrics, you will lack methodologies. We will add to our capability to e-enable without decrementing our ability to synergize. We have come to know that it is better to brand extensibly than to revolutionize transparently. the fish has refactored the concept of R&D. If you grow robustly, you may have to generate strategically. What does it really mean to synthesize "macro-mega-transparently"? We will seize the commonly-used term "proactive". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The power to embrace micro-virally leads to the capacity to engage proactively. What does the jargon-based term "granular" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "reality-based turn-key CAD" really mean? We will innovate the capacity of paradigms to leverage. We have come to know that if you productize super-dynamically then you may also engage intuitively. Think ultra-frictionless.