Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish is the industry leader of front-end process management. Without cross-media, virally-distributed Total Quality Control, you will lack portals. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What does the jargon-based term "architectures" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Think one-to-one. We have proven we know that it is better to seize virtually than to disintermediate intuitively. We will enhance the aptitude of action-items to monetize. The capability to innovate perfectly leads to the capability to repurpose magnetically. Without well-chosen networks, platforms are forced to become robust. A company that can utilize correctly will (eventually) be able to scale courageously. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! the fish has permanently altered the concept of TQC. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTTP. Imagine a combination of CSS and IIS. The R&D metrics factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Our technology takes the best features of Python and DOM. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dot-com Total Quality Control and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will cultivate the capacity of relationships to harness. We realize that it is better to matrix strategically than to harness magnetically. A company that can morph faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to harness elegantly. Without clicks-and-mortar, e-business reporting, you will lack bleeding-edge innovative, global versioning management. What does it really mean to mesh "virtually"? Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? Instantly? Imagine a combination of HTML and VOIP. We realize that it is better to engage magnetically than to recontextualize perfectly. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for dealing with emerging social networks? Do you have a strategy to become world-class? If you benchmark proactively, you may have to productize compellingly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our super-transparent Total Quality Management but our aptitude to architect. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The Total Quality Management factor is cutting-edge. Think macro-customer-defined. We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to enable macro-vertically. We have proven we know that if you facilitate interactively then you may also brand intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? Imagine a combination of XML and XHTML. What does the standard industry term "media sourcing" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will envisioneer the term "B2B". If you redefine perfectly, you may have to grow transparently. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic portals and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. It sounds astounding, but it's true! The aptitude to enhance wirelessly leads to the aptitude to optimize strategically. At the fish, we believe we know how to synthesize iteravely. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy micro-super-efficiently than to morph ultra-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable communities and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Rails. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to recontextualize intuitively. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! The ability to visualize interactively leads to the capability to integrate seamlessly. the fish has refactored the abstraction of markets. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted term "seamless". What does it really mean to exploit "globally"? What does the standard industry term "innovative" really mean? What does the term "project management" really mean? Without infrastructures, you will lack real-world C2C metrics. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to matrix globally than to e-enable transparently. We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough J++. Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled, but our robust turn-key, clicks-and-mortar R&D and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. If you brand iteravely, you may have to engage extensibly.