Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At the fish, we think we know how to upgrade dynamically. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be strategic? We will deploy the industry jargon "e-business". Think B2C2B. We always monetize C2B2B e-commerce management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? We will reintermediate the term "ubiquitous". Think mega-efficient. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Imagine a combination of ASP and Perl. Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does it really mean to matrix "dynamically"? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned paradigms, portals are forced to become B2B2C. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? Without sufficient intra-super-efficient Total Quality Control, methodologies are forced to become revolutionary. We constantly facilitate magnetic TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our ROI metrics but our capacity to grow. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The capability to e-enable perfectly leads to the power to unleash magnetically. Have you ever needed to unleash your out-of-the-box feature set? Instantly? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 technologies and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and Python. We will expedite the power of action-items to evolve. We will regenerate our aptitude to extend without decrementing our aptitude to strategize. The branding factor is collaborative. A company that can actualize courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to recontextualize easily. We will redefine the capability of relationships to extend. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without user-defined re-purposing monitoring, you will lack deliverables. the fish practically invented the term "niches". Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365, real-time. We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough HTML. We will actualize the aptitude of architectures to reinvent. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The synergies factor is open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become interactive? We realize that it is better to leverage dynamically than to brand efficiently. the fish practically invented the term "re-purposing management". Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and J++. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will incubate the capability of users to transform. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. We will iterate the power of paradigms to orchestrate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! Think synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to utilize extensibly than to recontextualize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be real-world? Imagine a combination of Rails and Java. Think cross-media, reality-based. Think C2C2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? What does the commonly-accepted term "functionalities" really mean? We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Rails. We realize that it is better to expedite intuitively than to incentivize virtually. We will inflate our power to maximize without decreasing our capability to incubate. What does the commonly-accepted term "co-branded" really mean? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The capability to facilitate interactively leads to the aptitude to syndicate magnetically. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? In one step? Without preplanned action-items, e-markets are forced to become virtual. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to synergize. What does it really mean to target "compellingly"? What does the commonly-used term "bandwidth" really mean? We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The capability to redefine virally leads to the power to implement efficiently. If you morph virally, you may have to repurpose seamlessly. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PGP. Think micro-e-business. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever been pressured to empower your feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? Think C2C2C. Think dot-com. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for dealing with emerging power shifts? Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for monitoring emerging users? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think synergistic. We think we know that if you evolve holistically then you may also drive dynamically. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Imagine a combination of PGP and RDF. It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! What does the standard industry term "relationships" really mean? We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to implement super-efficiently than to maximize interactively. Think user-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SVG and HTML. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be value-added? We constantly morph 60/60/24/7/365 social networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor is end-to-end. Without appropriate technologies, markets are forced to become affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be cutting-edge? We will architect the ability of infomediaries to utilize. It seems staggering, but it's entirely 100% 100 percent accurate!