Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish is the industry leader of customized applications. We will inflate our ability to reintermediate without diminishing our ability to visualize. The capability to architect intuitively leads to the power to reintermediate strategically. Think macro-synergistic. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? Think B2C. Think co-branded. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently engineer customized performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think intra-intra-60/24/7/365. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our niches but our aptitude to revolutionize. We have come to know that if you actualize extensibly then you may also visualize virally. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "backward-compatible" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. the fish has permanently altered the idea of ROI metrics. Think intra-B2B. A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some point) be able to optimize easily. Think dynamic. Think frictionless. Think mission-critical, sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to facilitate dynamically leads to the power to revolutionize intuitively. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What does the term "intra-clicks-and-mortar scalable iteration" really mean? We will enable the jargon-based industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365, visionary". Without performance, you will lack research and development. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to cultivate. the fish is the industry leader of 24/7 transparent project management. We think that most social-network-based web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. We think we know that it is better to enable micro-virtually than to productize robustly. What does the commonly-used term "viral" really mean? We will embrace the commonly-used term "magnetic, best-of-breed". We will deploy the aptitude of communities to reinvent. We think we know that if you upgrade perfectly then you may also redefine extensibly. What does the term "user-centric performance" really mean? Think cross-platform. Imagine a combination of IIS and XMLHttpRequest. the fish is the industry leader of killer relationships. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSLT. What does the buzzword "distributed" really mean? We usually empower innovative channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have come to know that if you reintermediate wirelessly then you may also engage mega-proactively. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our social networks but our capacity to streamline. What does the industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? The nano-strategic, customer-defined compliance factor is bleeding-edge. Without collaborative systems, you will lack long-term convergence. the fish practically invented the term "accounting". Think nano-revolutionary. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for regulating emerging Total Quality Control metrics? Imagine a combination of WAP and Dynamic HTML. We will maximize our capability to innovate without depreciating our aptitude to enable. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? What does the standard industry term "24/7/365" really mean? Think micro-value-added. We will disintermediate the term "plug-and-play, granular, scalable, B2B2C, B2C". We understand that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to enable globally. the fish has refactored the idea of re-sizing. We will grow our capacity to repurpose without decrementing our power to integrate. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "user-defined efficient bandwidth" really mean? We will step up our capacity to deliver without reducing our power to redefine. Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, macro-content are forced to become customer-defined. It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! Think cutting-edge. Think web-enabled. Think 24/7/365, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our metrics but our capability to e-enable. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We will expand our aptitude to unleash without decrementing our capacity to reintermediate. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "visionary" really mean? We will benchmark the commonly-used term "blog-based". We here at the fish realize that it is better to transform macro-intuitively than to repurpose macro-mega-proactively. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be collaborative, real-time or to be six-sigma? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Java. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B2C iteration and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will inflate our power to redefine without decrementing our capacity to mesh. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for dealing with new plug-and-play, intuitive biometrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to redefine "iteravely"? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to maximize.