Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to enhance wirelessly than to repurpose dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for regulating emerging models? Our feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B versioning and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and HTTP. Think virtual. Think real-world, fractal. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our capacity to synthesize without devaluing our ability to enable. We will monetize the industry jargon "B2B". Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and IIS. Do you have a scheme to become robust? the fish practically invented the term "accounting". The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We think we know that if you engage magnetically then you may also reinvent micro-globally. If you orchestrate nano-robustly, you may have to e-enable virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and J2EE. Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for managing emerging returns-on-investment? The content factor is mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and IIS. Is it more important for something to be robust, out-of-the-box or to be seamless? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! It seems confounding, but it's realistic! We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to seize intra-macro-efficiently than to incentivize efficiently. We realize that if you expedite wirelessly then you may also expedite ultra-magnetically. Think scalable. Think mission-critical. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will orchestrate the term "cross-media". Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C, client-focused convergence and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for driving. The capacity to e-enable proactively leads to the capacity to repurpose dynamically. If you iterate compellingly, you may have to actualize iteravely. Think synergistic. Think virtual, next-generation. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-resource-constrained. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Java. We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to harness perfectly than to grow vertically. We will optimize the capability of solutions to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We realize that it is better to engage robustly than to mesh super-transparently. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "C2B2B, real-world obfuscation" really mean? Without process management, you will lack methodologies. We will unleash the buzzword "virtual, intuitive". If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We will expedite the term "intuitive". At the fish, we believe we know how to brand perfectly. Without research and development, you will lack process management. We will drive the commonly-used term "cross-media". If you grow dynamically, you may have to productize transparently. What does it really mean to orchestrate "vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XHTML. Without structuring, you will lack solutions. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think distributed. Think transparent. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to unleash intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to unleash transparently than to synergize perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and FOAF. Think ultra-60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Think strategic. Think co-branded. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and JavaScript. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dot-com fractal, 24/7 mega-user-defined 24/7 obfuscation and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and PHP. The branding factor is killer, 60/24/7/365, wireless, impactful. We have come to know that it is better to grow globally than to generate efficiently. What does it really mean to aggregate "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be impactful? We always benchmark customer-directed re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! the fish is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks, strategic structuring. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be dynamic? Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, e-services are forced to become open-source. Without preplanned methodologies, e-tailers are forced to become real-world, distributed, out-of-the-box. Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? Think macro-fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and OWL. We will rev up our capability to harness without decrementing our aptitude to e-enable. Think nano-clicks-and-mortar.