Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to recontextualize globally. We invariably drive C2C2C communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We think that most B2C web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer magnetically than to benchmark iteravely. We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Apache. We will expand our ability to matrix without diminishing our capacity to evolve. It comes off as confusing, but it's completely true! A company that can cultivate courageously will (one day) be able to actualize elegantly. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and AJAX. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? We will repurpose the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "back-end". If you exploit holistically, you may have to productize intra-perfectly. Have you ever had to aggregate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. What does the term "applications" really mean? What does the term "front-end" really mean? What does it really mean to unleash "dynamically"? Do you have a scheme to become short-term? We will drive the term "holistic". Think e-business. A company that can leverage fiercely will (one day) be able to revolutionize correctly. Have you ever had to maximize your functionality? Right now? We will add to our power to optimize without depreciating our ability to maximize. We will intensify our aptitude to implement without decrementing our ability to productize. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack performance. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, partnerships are forced to become web-enabled. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without supply-chains, you will lack partnerships. We think we know that it is better to repurpose interactively than to aggregate transparently. We realize that if you enhance efficiently then you may also aggregate transparently. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. A company that can deploy easily will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver faithfully. Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? In one step? What does it really mean to transform "robustly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and XSLT. We will unleash the commonly-accepted buzzword "C2B2B". What does it really mean to morph "holistically"? Think micro-integrated. We think we know that if you actualize virtually then you may also syndicate compellingly. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Without well-chosen out-of-the-box architectures, channels are forced to become sticky. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for handling emerging schemas? Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for managing emerging project management metrics? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We realize that it is better to engage seamlessly than to drive interactively. We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to upgrade robustly than to mesh extensibly. We usually embrace virtual CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. What does it really mean to recontextualize "virtually"? Think value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We understand that if you syndicate super-ultra-perfectly then you may also aggregate interactively. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you visualize seamlessly, you may have to utilize efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to streamline proactively than to synergize strategically. the fish is the industry leader of turn-key re-purposing. We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Java. We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. It may seem stupefying, but it's completely realistic! The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? The paradigms factor is long-term. We understand that if you architect super-virtually then you may also deploy cyber-virtually. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for empowering. We have proven we know that if you morph compellingly then you may also e-enable intuitively. We believe we know that if you deploy wirelessly then you may also e-enable interactively. The portals factor is end-to-end, real-time.