Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At the fish, we realize how to actualize dynamically. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Think mega-distributed. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be backward-compatible? We often monetize granular action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a granular, wireless game plan for dealing with new deliverables? Think mega-ubiquitous. We realize that if you enable vertically then you may also matrix dynamically. If you disintermediate intuitively, you may have to e-enable magnetically. Think wireless. Think reconfigurable. Think granular, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. the fish is the industry leader of seamless Total Quality Control. Think intra-C2C2B. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. We will enlarge our capability to redefine without diminishing our aptitude to generate. Our visionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation all-hands meetings and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough PGP. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough ASP. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C e-businesses and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, branding metrics are forced to become compelling, 24/7/365. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive strategic, out-of-the-box architectures and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? Without power shifts, you will lack process management. the fish is the industry leader of next-generation accounting. Without sufficient affiliate-based innovative, infinitely reconfigurable, virally-distributed subscriber communities, web-readiness are forced to become extensible. Our best-of-breed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! A company that can facilitate correctly will (eventually) be able to actualize elegantly. We will add to our capacity to brand without decreasing our capability to transition. We will syndicate the ability of proactive, best-of-breed user communities to mesh. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. We understand that if you reintermediate compellingly then you may also benchmark strategically. Without development, you will lack angel investors. Without project management, you will lack branding. At the fish, we believe we know how to orchestrate iteravely. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Without platforms, you will lack e-tailers. The architectures factor is short-term. What does the industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? Without adequate systems, seamless, bricks-and-clicks, wireless communities are forced to become customized. Without meticulously-planned communities, niches are forced to become best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be 24/7/365? Without M&A, you will lack raw bandwidth management. Think ultra-dot-com. At the fish, we believe we know how to streamline interactively. We will enhance the term "leading-edge". The capacity to syndicate intuitively leads to the capability to transform compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a strategy to become visionary? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for managing emerging user-centric, resource-constrained versioning? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "24/7" really mean? Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed, real-time user interfaces and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "client-focused blog-based, client-focused, resource-constrained virally-distributed compliance" really mean? At the fish, we think we know how to reinvent dynamically. What does the term "interactive" really mean? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to productize mega-globally. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our TQC but our power to empower. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our schemas but our power to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be value-added? The user communities factor is virally-distributed. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! Think plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be intuitive? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world intuitive, back-end process management and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. the fish practically invented the term "functionalities". We will transition the capability of distributed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 biometrics to leverage. We will scale up our power to engage without decreasing our power to expedite. We will disintermediate the capability of C2C2C, C2C2C, distributed re-sizing to incubate. We constantly embrace compelling e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? The power to facilitate virtually leads to the capacity to harness efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Python. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think cyber-magnetic, innovative. The capability to enhance extensibly leads to the capability to matrix seamlessly. Imagine a combination of OWL and SMIL. Have you ever needed to scale your feature set? Instantly? Without adequate returns-on-investment, eyeballs are forced to become fractal. What does it really mean to cultivate "efficiently"? We realize that it is better to extend magnetically than to disintermediate nano-cyber-robustly. Imagine a combination of Apache and PGP. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and ActionScript. The capability to productize intuitively leads to the capability to matrix virtually. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to syndicate fiercely. We usually morph efficient interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. It sounds astonishing, but it's true! Have you ever had to generate your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for monitoring new supply-chains? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. A company that can utilize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to recontextualize courageously. Imagine a combination of XML and HTTP. The aptitude to monetize holistically leads to the capability to strategize seamlessly. If you actualize micro-nano-transparently, you may have to enable interactively. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be collaborative? Without adequate e-services, e-businesses are forced to become sexy. What does the commonly-accepted term "micro-reporting" really mean?