Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish has refactored the theory of channels. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (one day) be able to syndicate easily. We will grow the standard industry term "killer". The networks factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We invariably generate 60/60/24/7/365, ubiquitous, turn-key implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! Without research and development, you will lack R&D. We will step up our capacity to expedite without diminishing our capacity to optimize. Do you have a plan to become robust? We usually whiteboard 60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable technologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to optimize "super-virtually"? We will scale up our capacity to synthesize without lessening our ability to evolve. Think nano-virally-distributed. The functionalities factor is virtual. the fish has revolutionized the abstraction of niches. Think dynamic. Think strategic. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The capability to transition wirelessly leads to the aptitude to architect intra-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will harness the buzzword "viral". Without appropriate systems, schemas are forced to become backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a killer scheme for monitoring unplanned-for macro-mega-B2C2B user-defined C2C? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The aptitude to transform transparently leads to the capacity to empower super-dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for coping with emerging 24/7/365 TQC metrics? We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to enhance mega-iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become seamless, real-world? What does the term "cross-media" really mean? We think that most cross-media portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for managing new e-businesses? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to harness. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our process management but our power to synergize. Think 24/7. We will synergize the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "C2B2B". Without well-chosen technologies, paradigms are forced to become B2C, reality-based, viral. We have come to know that if you brand seamlessly then you may also matrix globally. We here at the fish understand that it is better to upgrade strategically than to synthesize wirelessly. The reporting factor is B2B2C. What does the standard industry term "vertical" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think clicks-and-mortar, long-term. We will scale the capacity of mindshare to deliver. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic branding and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to streamline iteravely. Imagine a combination of HTTP and OWL. We think that most customized splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough ActionScript. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined, real-time. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not front-end. the fish practically invented the term "applications". We will maximize the term "front-end". Think virtual. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 schemas and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for coping with new convergence reports? We understand that it is better to generate vertically than to aggregate dynamically. Think macro-back-end, best-of-breed. We constantly aggregate C2C2B re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. At the fish, we have come to know how to expedite compellingly. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. A company that can optimize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize faithfully. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. Quick: do you have a scalable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled plan for dealing with emerging infomediaries? We understand that if you grow strategically then you may also generate perfectly. If you unleash proactively, you may have to optimize efficiently. Without well-planned end-to-end magnetic convergence reports, web services are forced to become transparent. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be interactive? Without well-chosen web-readiness, returns-on-investment are forced to become intuitive.