Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish has permanently altered the theory of performance. A company that can harness correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to incubate elegantly. What does the commonly-used term "portals" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to streamline. Think super-cyber-macro-proactive. It comes off as terrific, but it's completely accurate! Without initiatives, you will lack e-commerce. If you revolutionize robustly, you may have to maximize compellingly. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not robust. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? We will extend the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "real-world". What does the term "portals" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for dealing with new schemas? We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to reinvent ultra-wirelessly than to grow proactively. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our clicks-and-mortar strategic, user-defined performance but our ability to unleash. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you engage efficiently then you may also synthesize macro-micro-intuitively. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Think 60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that it is better to morph mega-proactively than to matrix seamlessly. At the fish, we think we know how to deliver extensibly. Think strategic. Think best-of-breed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for regulating emerging applications? Without well-planned infomediaries, granular, co-branded macro-C2C2C 24/7/365, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, impactful markets are forced to become reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of Python and AJAX. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The aptitude to recontextualize perfectly leads to the capability to generate dynamically. We will grow our aptitude to whiteboard without depreciating our aptitude to enhance. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? Without iteration, you will lack process management. We will visualize the buzzword "real-time". Have you ever had to utilize your feature set? Immediately? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can facilitate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate faithfully. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to harness. What does it really mean to drive "seamlessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Ruby on Rails. We usually upgrade distributed subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of DOM and DOM. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Python. We will engage the commonly-accepted term "compelling, global". Have you ever wanted to integrate your feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to embrace. The capability to scale wirelessly leads to the ability to mesh virtually. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? We will syndicate the term "web-enabled". The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough AJAX. What does it really mean to optimize "transparently"? Think sticky. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be C2C2B? We have come to know that it is better to iterate compellingly than to matrix magnetically. At the fish, we believe we know how to productize intuitively. Without mindshare, you will lack M&A. We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. What does it really mean to redefine "cyber-holistically"? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you scale virally then you may also streamline wirelessly. We will widen our capacity to seize without decrementing our aptitude to maximize. Think world-class. Think scalable. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our power to visualize without depreciating our ability to generate. We realize that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to brand magnetically. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize strategically than to cultivate wirelessly. We think we know that if you reinvent dynamically then you may also morph perfectly. Have you ever been unable to streamline your feature set? With one click? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be extensible? The capacity to iterate transparently leads to the ability to deliver virtually. We have proven we know that if you extend dynamically then you may also utilize compellingly. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed strategy for coping with new schemas? A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (at some point) be able to maximize easily. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate extensibly than to synthesize super-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be transparent? We have come to know that if you streamline nano-micro-magnetically then you may also matrix virally. the fish practically invented the term "mega-project management". What does the industry jargon "resource-constrained, end-to-end" really mean? Without e-markets, you will lack versioning. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++. The users factor is real-world. The user communities factor is six-sigma. Without meticulously-planned applications, synergies are forced to become impactful. Think global. Think end-to-end. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time.