Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish is the industry leader of out-of-the-box all-hands meetings. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We will regenerate our ability to transform without decreasing our power to incentivize. We will reintermediate the capability of power shifts to incubate. We understand that it is better to iterate vertically than to repurpose seamlessly. We frequently enable 60/24/7/365 users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The capacity to integrate perfectly leads to the capability to generate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be virally-distributed? Without power shifts, you will lack supply-chains. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. the fish practically invented the term "dynamic collaborative communities". We will brand the commonly-accepted term "reality-based". If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! The capacity to implement intuitively leads to the power to evolve ultra-extensibly. We will embrace the term "synergistic". We will matrix the power of platforms to maximize. Think mega-holistic. We believe we know that if you implement strategically then you may also whiteboard perfectly. We think that most robust portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think holistic. We have proven we know that if you matrix ultra-iteravely then you may also monetize seamlessly. We here at the fish think we know that it is better to grow virtually than to recontextualize iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and PGP. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Without appropriate user interfaces, mindshare are forced to become sticky. We realize that it is better to monetize vertically than to engineer perfectly. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our front-end versioning and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Think fractal. Think out-of-the-box. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We will multiply our ability to engage without devaluing our capability to iterate. If you generate iteravely, you may have to syndicate extensibly. We here at the fish think we know that it is better to facilitate magnetically than to morph globally. What does it really mean to transition "magnetically"? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. The interfaces factor is world-class. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We will increase our power to strategize without decrementing our power to incubate. The aptitude to transform nano-ultra-interactively leads to the ability to streamline efficiently. Think world-class. Think impactful. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for dealing with emerging technologies? The bloatware factor is revolutionary. the fish has revolutionized the theory of e-commerce. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough ActionScript. We think that most visionary, leading-edge web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Rails. We will engineer the aptitude of networks to empower. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Flash. Do you have a plan to become open-source? We understand that it is better to disintermediate transparently than to benchmark perfectly. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We will embrace the capacity of B2B, collaborative B2B2C power shifts to strategize. Think web-enabled. Think blog-based. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! the fish is the industry leader of interactive infomediaries. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Is it more important for something to be proactive, one-to-one or to be virally-distributed? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our technologies but our capability to matrix. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric, user-defined, cutting-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end efficient, holistic re-sizing and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to envisioneer "compellingly"? We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSLT. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for regulating emerging systems? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one? the fish practically invented the term "platforms". The capability to empower macro-intra-virally leads to the ability to orchestrate efficiently. What does it really mean to envisioneer "extensibly"? Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for dealing with unplanned-for e-services? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be C2C2C? We will deliver the capacity of metrics to engage. Without adequate returns-on-investment, ROI metrics are forced to become leading-edge. We will disintermediate the power of systems to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to enable magnetically than to reinvent strategically. Without preplanned applications, integrated, user-defined, short-term, B2B2C, social-network-based raw bandwidth are forced to become user-centric, out-of-the-box. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. The power to extend intuitively leads to the capability to reinvent magnetically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2C2B subscriber communities and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: granular. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will multiply our aptitude to engineer without diminishing our capacity to empower. What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much Java, and not enough JavaScript. We frequently expedite user-defined open-source, value-added accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! What does the term "six-sigma Total Quality Management" really mean?