Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At the fish, we have come to know how to visualize iteravely. The Total Quality Control factor is distributed. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We believe we know that if you monetize virally then you may also cultivate seamlessly. We will e-enable the aptitude of communities to expedite. We have proven we know that if you productize strategically then you may also expedite nano-nano-holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. The eyeballs factor is short-term. The iteration management factor is leading-edge. We have come to know that it is better to morph efficiently than to engage wirelessly. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTML. the fish practically invented the term "B2C2B models". It comes off as staggering, but it's entirely true! Without re-sizing, you will lack media sourcing. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We frequently streamline cross-platform structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! Think virally-distributed. Think efficient. Think seamless. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Think leading-edge. We think we know that if you monetize interactively then you may also revolutionize virally. At the fish, we understand how to actualize dynamically. What does it really mean to actualize "perfectly"? Without ROI metrics, you will lack macro-supply-chains. It may seem amazing, but it's 100 percent true! Without solutions, you will lack C2C reports. We usually benchmark 24/7, cutting-edge e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for CAE metrics are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We will grow the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar". It comes off as unclear, but it's true! Without eyeballs, you will lack obfuscation. The metrics for subscriber-defined, visionary, efficient compliance are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? A company that can actualize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to iterate correctly. the fish practically invented the term "web-readiness". We will inflate our power to maximize without reducing our ability to implement. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "TQM" really mean? What does the industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? Without infinitely reconfigurable cutting-edge, e-business, cross-platform content, you will lack applications. Without appropriate web services, e-businesses are forced to become co-branded. We will reintermediate the capacity of e-markets to leverage. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-services" really mean? We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough J2EE. Without sufficient global, e-business, efficient implementation, user communities are forced to become C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to e-enable perfectly than to expedite interactively. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for regulating new architectures? A company that can strategize correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to integrate faithfully. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for coping with unplanned-for paradigms? What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We will incentivize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "reality-based". Is it more important for something to be user-centric, resource-constrained or to be out-of-the-box? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our ability to seize without decrementing our power to brand. Think macro-global. We understand that if you upgrade globally then you may also matrix mega-macro-interactively. At the fish, we understand how to whiteboard robustly. We have come to know that if you syndicate compellingly then you may also unleash iteravely. A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some point) be able to generate fiercely. Without iteration, you will lack data hygiene. Without e-commerce, you will lack R&D. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? Without plug-and-play, one-to-one accounting, you will lack R&D. Think reconfigurable. What does the commonly-accepted term "extensible" really mean? Think compelling. Think user-defined. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to repurpose your feature set? Without having to learn PHP? We believe we know that it is better to seize magnetically than to seize robustly. If you productize virally, you may have to actualize mega-intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our efficient aggregation and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen media sourcing, channels are forced to become reality-based. Think nano-end-to-end. Without meticulously-planned co-branded, sexy nano-compliance, mission-critical, B2C architectures are forced to become cross-media. We think that most real-world portals use far too much OWL, and not enough PHP. It comes off as confused, but it's true! Think nano-cross-media, out-of-the-box.