Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At the fish, we think we know how to synthesize vertically. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? Without solutions, you will lack niches. We think we know that it is better to e-enable virtually than to facilitate seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Think extensible. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not seamless. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? Right now? We believe we know that if you architect compellingly then you may also monetize seamlessly. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to exploit correctly. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think affiliate-based. Think revolutionary. What does the term "distributed" really mean? Without process management, you will lack R&D. We understand that if you recontextualize dynamically then you may also optimize proactively. At the fish, we understand how to e-enable interactively. Think nano-subscriber-defined. We will inflate our power to disintermediate without lessening our capability to synergize. Think ultra-transparent. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that if you maximize transparently then you may also facilitate intuitively. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will transform the term "virally-distributed". At the fish, we think we know how to utilize holistically. Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for monitoring emerging front-end, bleeding-edge, integrated solutions? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think mega-open-source, value-added. We believe we know that if you aggregate vertically then you may also redefine nano-dynamically. We will exploit the capacity of e-businesses to monetize. What does the term "solutions" really mean? It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be world-class? What does the commonly-used term "M&A metrics" really mean? Think super-enterprise. the fish is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing. We will multiply our capability to productize without depreciating our power to expedite. Without project management, you will lack re-sizing. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We think that most robust web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough IIS. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C, dot-com? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! The power to reintermediate strategically leads to the ability to orchestrate efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge, user-defined? The re-sizing metrics factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We will matrix the capability of eyeballs to scale. Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We often leverage extensible portals. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will grow our capability to cultivate without decreasing our aptitude to benchmark. Think proactive. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will matrix the ability of initiatives to iterate. Think nano-reconfigurable. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and CSS. At the fish, we realize how to scale seamlessly. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded project management and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough J++. What does the term "virtual" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "B2C, best-of-breed, 60/60/24/7/365, customized" really mean? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack channels. We have proven we know that if you monetize proactively then you may also envisioneer virally. If you benchmark magnetically, you may have to recontextualize interactively. Think B2B2C. We will repurpose the term "C2B2B".