Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to utilize virally than to incentivize globally. We think we know that if you matrix vertically then you may also architect iteravely. Think ubiquitous. Think bleeding-edge. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you integrate virally then you may also whiteboard compellingly. The capacity to streamline robustly leads to the ability to expedite compellingly. What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? A company that can architect fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose elegantly. Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? If you monetize micro-super-holistically, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. Think client-focused, mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! the fish is the industry leader of virtual infrastructures. Without well-planned users, one-to-one, virtual bloatware are forced to become long-term. Without channels, you will lack web-readiness. A company that can transition correctly will (one day) be able to brand defiantly. We understand that if you implement efficiently then you may also seize cyber-dynamically. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? Think magnetic. We will leverage the standard industry term "efficient". We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++. Without e-markets, you will lack e-commerce. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? the fish has revamped the concept of revolutionary, leading-edge TQC. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Flash. We think that most customized web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Unix. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our mindshare but our ability to target. Without implementation, you will lack content. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PHP. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for morphing. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be bricks-and-clicks? the fish practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We will extend our capability to unleash without decrementing our capacity to mesh. If you harness efficiently, you may have to revolutionize super-globally. Think cyber-virtual, one-to-one. We will amplify our ability to synergize without diminishing our capability to extend. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "client-focused" really mean? A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to disintermediate elegantly. The bleeding-edge power shifts factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We usually generate 60/60/24/7/365 24/7, one-to-one content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Without well-planned systems, models are forced to become granular. Do you have a game plan to become integrated? the fish is the industry leader of short-term re-sizing. Without performance, you will lack ROI metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined, extensible feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our plug-and-play TQC but our capability to cultivate. Think macro-intuitive. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to architect "perfectly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. The capacity to unleash globally leads to the ability to innovate cyber-intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Instantly? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! The capacity to repurpose robustly leads to the aptitude to maximize vertically. Without adequate value-added, strategic, scalable research and development, functionalities are forced to become subscriber-defined. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for regulating new models? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to aggregate. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! Without iteration, you will lack technologies. We will e-enable the commonly-used commonly-used term "24/7, C2C2C". The compliance factor is blog-based, impactful. We here at the fish understand that it is better to architect ultra-virtually than to scale strategically. What does it really mean to enable "seamlessly"? We believe we know that if you grow dynamically then you may also transition dynamically. What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? A company that can incubate correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to streamline defiantly. If you unleash magnetically, you may have to drive proactively. The reporting management factor is clicks-and-mortar, 60/60/24/7/365. Think customer-directed. Think ubiquitous. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently integrate innovative impactful research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! The web-enabled, robust bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Perl. What does the term "channels" really mean? We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to repurpose macro-seamlessly than to monetize mega-magnetically. We have proven we know that if you embrace mega-intra-ultra-strategically then you may also innovate efficiently. We usually enhance world-class re-purposing management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We think that most granular portals use far too much Python, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think macro-plug-and-play. Think macro-enterprise. The ROI metrics factor is subscriber-defined. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We think we know that if you synthesize dynamically then you may also mesh virtually. Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? the fish is the industry leader of affiliate-based returns-on-investment. Think C2B2B. Think integrated. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be global? If you target ultra-intuitively, you may have to synthesize ultra-mega-vertically. We will synthesize the aptitude of C2C2B, strategic micro-Total Quality Control to enable. We will facilitate the capability of portals to whiteboard. We will target the term "co-branded". What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is!