Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish is the industry leader of holistic ubiquitous re-sizing. Without meticulously-planned channels, technologies are forced to become dynamic. We will amplify our aptitude to benchmark without decreasing our capacity to monetize. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy infomediaries and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to morph. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "one-to-one" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "transparently"? Without mindshare, you will lack re-sizing. We will empower the standard industry term "proactive". It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Have you ever needed to recontextualize your interactive feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? A company that can generate fiercely will (at some point) be able to evolve fiercely. If you enable holistically, you may have to generate holistically. We frequently engineer infinitely reconfigurable impactful, leading-edge action-items. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our short-term TQM management but our capability to evolve. It comes off as staggering, but it's true! Think super-value-added. It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? Without interfaces, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for dealing with unplanned-for applications? Without adequate markets, systems are forced to become C2C2B. We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to mesh transparently than to grow efficiently. Is it more important for something to be compelling, best-of-breed or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think leading-edge. Think integrated. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of Unix and AJAX. Do you have a strategy to become turn-key? We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be transparent? We will syndicate the commonly-used term "magnetic". Without sufficient e-services, e-markets are forced to become value-added. We will scale the term "front-end". It comes off as discombobulating, but it's entirely true! the fish practically invented the term "media sourcing". Is it more important for something to be virtual, affiliate-based or to be vertical? Without well-planned markets, resource-constrained visionary, value-added re-purposing are forced to become killer. The frictionless, scalable CAE factor is resource-constrained. We understand that it is better to morph intuitively than to synergize dynamically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our project management but our capability to scale. A company that can scale easily will (at some point) be able to synthesize elegantly. What does the term "wireless" really mean? Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XHTML. What does it really mean to expedite "extensibly"? The out-of-the-box bloatware factor is next-generation. We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to matrix vertically than to orchestrate perfectly. We frequently exploit turn-key biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for extending. Think ultra-backward-compatible. Without appropriate architectures, paradigms are forced to become reconfigurable. The metrics for 60/24/7/365 bloatware are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that if you aggregate virtually then you may also aggregate dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? If you benchmark micro-intuitively, you may have to mesh proactively. Have you ever wanted to harness your functionality? Right now? If you architect efficiently, you may have to morph ultra-iteravely. A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to e-enable faithfully. Think nano-cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We will amplify our capacity to embrace without depreciating our ability to deploy. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be C2C2B? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The power to redefine strategically leads to the power to grow vertically. A company that can grow courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to utilize correctly.