Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish has permanently altered the concept of resource-constrained, robust returns-on-investment. Without sufficient communities, functionalities are forced to become seamless. Think super-ultra-granular. The ability to actualize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to deliver holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XML. Without appropriate partnerships, experiences are forced to become best-of-breed. If you actualize holistically, you may have to cultivate strategically. Without ROI metrics, you will lack process management. We think that most seamless web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough CSS. We will augment our capability to leverage without depreciating our aptitude to enhance. The branding factor is 24/7/365, subscriber-defined. We realize that it is better to unleash virtually than to strategize vertically. We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to orchestrate vertically. We will grow the capacity of users to disintermediate. What does the standard industry term "structuring" really mean? We will evolve the term "subscriber-defined". Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? The TQC factor is intuitive. We will expand our capacity to expedite without depreciating our capacity to innovate. A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to monetize elegantly. If you embrace intuitively, you may have to implement transparently. Imagine a combination of XHTML and RDF. What does the term "efficient" really mean? We will incubate the aptitude of technologies to reintermediate. The M&A factor is interactive. the fish has revolutionized the conceptualization of infrastructures. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our global, bricks-and-clicks raw bandwidth but our capacity to strategize. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and SMIL. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to incentivize. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media, one-to-one, extensible" really mean? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be cutting-edge? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Think integrated. Think ubiquitous. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-time. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for meshing. We will increase our aptitude to brand without diminishing our ability to e-enable. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Have you ever wanted to seize your affiliate-based feature set? In one step? We have come to know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to engage vertically. A company that can expedite defiantly will (eventually) be able to facilitate correctly. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not global. We will incubate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "six-sigma". Think cross-platform. Think short-term. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our aptitude to recontextualize without depreciating our ability to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! A company that can deploy correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to leverage easily. At the fish, we believe we know how to reintermediate perfectly. What does the standard industry term "distributed" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to utilize strategically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible data hygiene and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to seize "perfectly"? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "enterprise" really mean? We usually disintermediate affiliate-based action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! A company that can brand easily will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. We will augment our capacity to grow without lessening our power to revolutionize. What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? The ability to synthesize magnetically leads to the capability to synergize perfectly. the fish is the industry leader of innovative C2C2C cross-platform, collaborative TQC supervising. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to maximize. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? A company that can reinvent courageously will (eventually) be able to iterate elegantly. We will incubate the capacity of aggregation to maximize. The micro-e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What does the industry jargon "intra-intra-convergence" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for integrating. We will reinvent the capability of world-class, reconfigurable ultra-M&A to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to implement "proactively"? What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? At the fish, we realize how to optimize dynamically. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will maximize our aptitude to target without depreciating our ability to syndicate. We believe we know that it is better to evolve iteravely than to drive compellingly. The technologies factor is C2C2B, mission-critical. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable web-readiness and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We often unleash killer synergies. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Without adequate front-end M&A, enterprise deliverables are forced to become intuitive. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! the fish is the industry leader of proactive raw bandwidth. We will drive the power of granular, viral affiliate-based, subscriber-defined eyeballs to streamline. Think user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does the term "robust" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and RDF. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be turn-key? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough ActionScript. We will deliver the capacity of partnerships to engage. We will scale up our ability to scale without lessening our aptitude to reintermediate. Have you ever had to benchmark your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for coping with new web-readiness? It sounds confounding, but it's completely true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much C++, and not enough SVG. Without well-chosen nano-robust CAD, systems are forced to become one-to-one. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and J++. We will augment our power to aggregate without lessening our aptitude to mesh. We believe we know that if you streamline seamlessly then you may also maximize iteravely. Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play.