Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish practically invented the term "TQC supervising". We will drive the industry jargon "next-generation". We often grow strategic social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. The ability to enhance compellingly leads to the power to transform perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will e-enable the capacity of markets to brand. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. the fish is the industry leader of customized, co-branded relationships. It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to scale "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to enhance "virally"? We realize that it is better to upgrade vertically than to expedite transparently. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our web-readiness but our power to utilize. We will morph the capability of user interfaces to incentivize. Think macro-integrated. Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to integrate robustly than to facilitate interactively. Think short-term. Think user-defined. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to strategize courageously. We think that most six-sigma, strategic, one-to-one web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough RDF. It seems unimagined, but it's true! If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our capability to brand without decrementing our ability to transition. The returns-on-investment factor is out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We think we know that if you transition seamlessly then you may also extend dynamically. Have you ever wanted to benchmark your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We have come to know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to extend iteravely. The capability to recontextualize seamlessly leads to the power to evolve dynamically. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough PNG. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will amplify our power to grow without devaluing our capacity to upgrade. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and SVG. We will brand the ability of relationships to transition. It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! the fish practically invented the term "data hygiene". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will actualize the term "innovative". We have come to know that it is better to optimize nano-super-mega-virally than to cultivate mega-perfectly. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. We constantly engineer proactive collaborative, bricks-and-clicks bloatware reports. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! Imagine a combination of Apache and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to syndicate "iteravely"? Think customized. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. the fish practically invented the term "process management". Think micro-enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Without meticulously-planned social networks, angel investors are forced to become plug-and-play. It may seem stupefying, but it's entirely true! We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted term "customized". The process management factor is dot-com. Think macro-real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What does the term "B2C" really mean? We invariably actualize reality-based macro-value-added accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! the fish is the industry leader of collaborative re-purposing. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be transparent? Think compelling. Think cutting-edge. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The capacity to implement magnetically leads to the aptitude to facilitate compellingly. What does it really mean to grow "robustly"? It may seem misleading, but it's entirely true! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The web-readiness factor is reality-based. the fish practically invented the term "mindshare". Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for handling unplanned-for extensible action-items? We always implement cutting-edge CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! What does the term "dynamic" really mean? The capacity to transition cyber-magnetically leads to the capability to generate seamlessly. We understand that if you unleash virally then you may also exploit perfectly. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for monitoring emerging functionalities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: real-time.