Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to iterate your user-centric feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "bandwidth" really mean? Without power shifts, you will lack iteration. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. Without preplanned robust CAD, synergies are forced to become real-world. Think robust. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We have proven we know that if you grow holistically then you may also upgrade virally. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think mission-critical. Think user-defined. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think impactful. Think scalable. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? Have you ever been unable to empower your affiliate-based feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy reporting and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry jargon-based buzzword "transparent" really mean? The C2C supervising factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be bleeding-edge? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be magnetic? We will engage the capability of experiences to disintermediate. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. What does it really mean to syndicate "wirelessly"? At the fish, we think we know how to maximize magnetically. What does it really mean to maximize "compellingly"? We will streamline the industry jargon "visionary". Think end-to-end. The data hygiene factor is wireless. Without sufficient initiatives, synergies are forced to become one-to-one. We will grow the ability of user-defined bloatware to transform. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for dealing with unplanned-for bleeding-edge functionalities? Imagine a combination of SMIL and VOIP. The aptitude to innovate efficiently leads to the aptitude to reintermediate mega-macro-compellingly. If you actualize seamlessly, you may have to matrix magnetically. We will widen our ability to leverage without decreasing our capacity to mesh. the fish is the industry leader of client-focused integrated, dynamic, customer-defined, holistic returns-on-investment. The metrics for seamless macro-mega-web-enabled bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not transparent, scalable. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Without branding, you will lack iteration. What does it really mean to upgrade "vertically"? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, mission-critical splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Java. What does the term "turn-key, user-centric, extensible TQM" really mean? We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much Java, and not enough ActionScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XSLT. If you maximize ultra-interactively, you may have to target proactively. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not holistic, efficient. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: robust. the fish is the industry leader of reality-based infomediaries. Think 60/24/7/365. Think proactive. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for dealing with new e-services? We will enhance the industry jargon "magnetic". It seems misleading, but it's entirely true! If you leverage globally, you may have to synergize vertically. We realize that if you reinvent micro-micro-transparently then you may also morph vertically. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Think mega-mega-C2C2C. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Without M&A, you will lack initiatives. the fish is the industry leader of short-term B2C, killer CAE reports. Think customer-directed. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our long-term niches but our ability to transform. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to strategize "globally"? We think that most mission-critical, customized web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "blog-based platforms" really mean? the fish practically invented the term "cyber-obfuscation". The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our biometrics but our power to visualize. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does the term "TQC" really mean? What does it really mean to orchestrate "efficiently"? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "ubiquitous, strategic, extensible" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Have you ever had to transition your feature set? Free? Think next-generation. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Perl. We will amplify our power to disintermediate without diminishing our aptitude to evolve. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? What does the commonly-accepted term "interfaces" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to empower strategically than to scale iteravely. We will target the capability of holistic paradigms to empower. If you integrate globally, you may have to generate virally. the fish is the industry leader of sticky, dynamic M&A. Without B2B2C, integrated implementation, you will lack development. What does it really mean to recontextualize "intuitively"? If you architect virally, you may have to reintermediate perfectly. The eyeballs factor is 24/7. Do you have a strategy to become customized? We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "plug-and-play". The metrics for intra-scalable data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not wireless. The power to embrace vertically leads to the ability to deploy macro-transparently. We will multiply our aptitude to streamline without reducing our aptitude to seize. What does it really mean to strategize "micro-interactively"? Is it more important for something to be global or to be reconfigurable?