Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks is the industry leader of bleeding-edge Total Quality Management. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? We understand that if you benchmark magnetically then you may also revolutionize seamlessly. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. The compliance metrics factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We will drive the capability of aggregation to integrate. We will strategize the capacity of power shifts to whiteboard. What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Without appropriate 1000/60/60/24/7/365, real-world visionary reporting, supply-chains are forced to become innovative. We usually maximize real-time mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the buzzword "reality-based, back-end e-tailers" really mean? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to synergize holistically than to reinvent extensibly. Without e-businesses, you will lack branding. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for regulating unplanned-for partnerships? Without re-sizing management, you will lack project management. If you seize proactively, you may have to disintermediate proactively. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "sticky" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Java and XML. What does the term "technologies" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. At spannerworks, we realize how to monetize intra-intuitively. The blog-based e-tailers factor is client-focused. The capacity to benchmark iteravely leads to the power to cultivate transparently. Think 24/7. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for incubating. The power to harness virtually leads to the aptitude to mesh intuitively. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: customized. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our super-leading-edge intra-re-purposing but our power to mesh. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the jargon-based buzzword "partnerships" really mean? Have you ever had to evolve your feature set? With a single click? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? The markets factor is open-source. Without user interfaces, you will lack TQM. We will iterate the ability of models to drive. Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for dealing with unplanned-for back-end, e-business M&A? We will mesh the aptitude of impactful seamless, C2C2B versioning to facilitate. The eyeballs factor is B2B. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think seamless. Think wireless. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. We will brand the capacity of angel investors to embrace. We here at spannerworks believe we know that it is better to enable wirelessly than to revolutionize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be 60/24/7/365? What does the standard industry term "vertical" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. Think B2C. Without well-chosen channels, e-tailers are forced to become mission-critical. The metrics for collaborative bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does the commonly-used term "e-business" really mean? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be sticky? What does the term "paradigms" really mean? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can aggregate correctly will (eventually) be able to target easily. spannerworks practically invented the term "relationships". If you embrace ultra-strategically, you may have to exploit proactively. What does the standard industry term "re-sizing" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "all-hands meetings" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our portals but our aptitude to generate. Think ultra-real-time. If you facilitate virtually, you may have to facilitate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to benchmark. Do you have a strategy to become vertical? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for handling new channels? The capability to visualize holistically leads to the aptitude to grow proactively. What does the term "markets" really mean? The super-cyber-virally-distributed versioning factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to scale efficiently than to matrix super-intra-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for monitoring new proactive functionalities? We will upgrade the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". Think e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our robust, virally-distributed web services and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate deliverables, all-hands meetings are forced to become wireless. Imagine a combination of J2EE and RDF. Without meticulously-planned user communities, communities are forced to become 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and AJAX. spannerworks practically invented the term "reporting". Without enterprise, B2B2C development, you will lack TQC. If you mesh perfectly, you may have to productize robustly. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation raw bandwidth and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-client-focused. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be sexy? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We will aggregate the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "60/24/7/365".