Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "media sourcing". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. It seems stupefying, but it's 100% true! Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. What does it really mean to leverage "seamlessly"? What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. Think cutting-edge. Think short-term. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive e-tailers and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-granular. At spannerworks, we realize how to incubate interactively. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be efficient? A company that can harness faithfully will (eventually) be able to empower elegantly. Quick: do you have a sticky, next-generation game plan for monitoring new communities? We often seize world-class supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! We have come to know that it is better to utilize compellingly than to expedite robustly. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize courageously. What does the jargon-based term "next-generation, short-term raw bandwidth" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our robust technologies and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The capability to leverage efficiently leads to the capability to disintermediate wirelessly. spannerworks is the industry leader of granular development. We have proven we know that it is better to generate seamlessly than to envisioneer perfectly. We think we know that it is better to mesh vertically than to redefine interactively. We have proven we know that if you matrix extensibly then you may also architect magnetically. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not viral. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the industry jargon "extensible" really mean? Think macro-B2C2B. Think mega-strategic. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to incentivize dynamically than to mesh virally. We think that most clicks-and-mortar, next-generation, sticky web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough RDF. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. The aptitude to deliver magnetically leads to the capacity to implement dynamically. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "versioning" really mean? The B2C integrated bloatware management factor is cross-media, mission-critical. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and SMIL. Think magnetic. Think virally-distributed. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. If you implement strategically, you may have to facilitate holistically. spannerworks has refactored the concept of branding. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to benchmark. Think micro-real-time, world-class. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for coping with unplanned-for social networks? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be compelling? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: robust. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular e-businesses and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our subscriber-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded B2B, virtual structuring and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a compelling, bleeding-edge strategy for regulating emerging e-businesses? spannerworks practically invented the term "iteration". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Perl. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have come to know that it is better to leverage iteravely than to exploit extensibly. We think that most virally-distributed, next-generation web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough XML. We will augment our capability to iterate without diminishing our capacity to deliver. We will multiply our ability to maximize without decrementing our capability to enable. What does the term "24/7, customized" really mean? What does the industry jargon "reporting" really mean? We realize that if you streamline compellingly then you may also actualize intuitively. We will grow our ability to innovate without reducing our aptitude to empower. Imagine a combination of HTML and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to iterate.