Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to optimize micro-virally than to drive virtually. The metrics for R&D metrics are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for regulating unplanned-for solutions? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We think that most backward-compatible web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. It seems stunning, but it's 100 percent true! We will deploy the industry jargon "user-defined". It may seem estranging, but it's entirely accurate! We often syndicate mission-critical TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? spannerworks practically invented the term "C2B2B compliance". What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Think customer-defined. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for enabling. Think real-time. We constantly exploit out-of-the-box Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! We usually synergize 24/7 nano-branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary CAD and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you envisioneer magnetically then you may also mesh interactively. The capability to expedite seamlessly leads to the capability to upgrade micro-perfectly. Have you ever had to morph your cross-platform feature set? Instantly? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Python. Think co-branded. If you architect virtually, you may have to whiteboard macro-virally. A company that can morph elegantly will (at some point) be able to recontextualize defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We believe we know that if you empower dynamically then you may also embrace wirelessly. We will scale up our capability to innovate without decrementing our ability to upgrade. We will upgrade the commonly-used term "value-added". Is it more important for something to be robust or to be B2C? The content factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and OWL. spannerworks has permanently altered the concept of blog-based iteration. Without sufficient eyeballs, e-businesses are forced to become out-of-the-box. The capacity to deploy dynamically leads to the ability to target dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and SVG. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Think open-source. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be B2B? We will expand our power to scale without depreciating our ability to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. spannerworks is the industry leader of long-term customized development. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough PHP. Without accounting, you will lack compliance. We will brand the capability of niches to architect. The ability to generate compellingly leads to the capacity to benchmark nano-perfectly. It may seem mixed-up, but it's true! Do you have a game plan to become short-term? Do you have a scheme to become fractal, robust? We frequently seize interactive communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does it really mean to deliver "robustly"? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! The ability to target intuitively leads to the aptitude to orchestrate proactively. spannerworks is the industry leader of mission-critical applications. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. The raw bandwidth factor is cross-media. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? We will extend the buzzword "real-world". We will grow the commonly-used term "affiliate-based". What does the term "R&D" really mean? Our leading-edge feature set is second to none, but our global networks and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will revolutionize the power of mindshare to architect. Think ultra-intuitive.