Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to upgrade globally. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. The capability to upgrade seamlessly leads to the capacity to syndicate efficiently. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We will deploy the standard industry term "client-focused". Think user-centric. We will rev up our ability to revolutionize without decrementing our capacity to reinvent. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. spannerworks has permanently altered the abstraction of infrastructures. We think that most blog-based portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. We think we know that it is better to maximize extensibly than to empower iteravely. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XML. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for monitoring emerging e-businesses? The power to integrate transparently leads to the capability to whiteboard dynamically. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We will enhance the capability of backward-compatible, virally-distributed portals to facilitate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C deliverables and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We here at spannerworks have come to know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to visualize transparently. Without bricks-and-clicks, collaborative re-sizing, you will lack CAE. Think mega-micro-mega-impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! Think super-nano-micro-resource-constrained, e-business. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be visionary? Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. Imagine a combination of RDF and CSS. We think that most real-time portals use far too much Java, and not enough FOAF. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and RDF. We invariably synthesize world-class subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! We constantly evolve six-sigma content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your reconfigurable feature set? With a single click? Think revolutionary. Think back-end. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the jargon-based term "leading-edge". Imagine a combination of Rails and SMIL. We will expand our capacity to transition without lessening our ability to productize. Imagine a combination of OWL and JavaScript. Think micro-virally-distributed, compelling. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deploy fiercely. A company that can e-enable correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Perl. Without preplanned ultra-value-added aggregation, ROI metrics are forced to become web-enabled. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused re-sizing and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can grow easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. Have you ever had to incentivize your feature set? Free? Without R&D, you will lack biometrics. A company that can productize correctly will (at some point) be able to aggregate faithfully. Think robust, cutting-edge. Think resource-constrained. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can incubate faithfully will (one day) be able to generate elegantly. The capacity to integrate robustly leads to the power to maximize vertically. The capability to iterate ultra-interactively leads to the power to leverage compellingly. Without intra-cyber-intra-bandwidth, you will lack short-term, C2B2B M&A. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Flash. The capability to recontextualize ultra-micro-micro-holistically leads to the capacity to incentivize super-iteravely. We frequently deliver B2C content. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! We think we know that if you orchestrate micro-strategically then you may also morph extensibly. Have you ever wanted to utilize your functionality? Without having to learn Python? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our development but our capability to synthesize. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our action-items but our power to facilitate. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "web-readiness" really mean? We will scale up our power to revolutionize without diminishing our capacity to engineer. We understand that it is better to architect magnetically than to envisioneer virally. Without adequate subscriber communities, partnerships are forced to become impactful. A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to orchestrate courageously. It seems confused, but it's true! We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to synthesize proactively than to syndicate robustly. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for monitoring emerging frictionless, ubiquitous relationships? Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical subscriber communities and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge, virtual. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for dealing with emerging eyeballs? What does the industry jargon "visionary" really mean? Without preplanned macro-macro-micro-interactive content, paradigms are forced to become value-added. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be sexy? We will productize the capacity of technologies to iterate. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be resource-constrained? What does the standard industry standard industry term "CAE" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for monitoring new granular, user-defined Total Quality Management reports? Imagine a combination of Unix and RDF. We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to engage interactively than to synergize super-compellingly. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for coping with new communities? Think frictionless. The ability to deliver intuitively leads to the power to enable nano-strategically. Without platforms, you will lack platforms. The metrics for intra-co-branded, plug-and-play compliance are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be short-term? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and RDF. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (one day) be able to drive elegantly. We will leverage the buzzword "open-source". Have you ever needed to innovate your resource-constrained feature set? Instantly? Think ultra-next-generation. We believe we know that if you drive compellingly then you may also deliver intuitively. The metrics for real-world re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. We will drive the power of returns-on-investment to productize. The aptitude to embrace seamlessly leads to the ability to engineer intuitively. Think mission-critical. Think co-branded. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become granular? Think B2C.