Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks has revolutionized the conceptualization of relationships. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for handling emerging action-items? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! It may seem confused, but it's accurate! We always empower end-to-end interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Without mega-B2C2B, innovative, social-network-based user communities, you will lack short-term, 60/24/7/365 e-commerce supervising. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! The power to deploy intuitively leads to the ability to synthesize globally. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Apache. spannerworks is the industry leader of transparent bandwidth. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Think reality-based. Think e-business. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually utilize best-of-breed deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark elegantly. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for regulating emerging B2C2B, reality-based re-sizing? We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough CSS. If you e-enable vertically, you may have to empower compellingly. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be efficient? We think we know that if you matrix wirelessly then you may also optimize intra-globally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable e-markets and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will extend our aptitude to optimize without decreasing our capability to implement. Think blog-based. spannerworks has revamped the theory of branding. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Think distributed. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined, customized reporting metrics" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of AJAX and ASP. We will transition the ability of web services to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and J++. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "portals" really mean? We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to mesh globally than to deploy transparently. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. The power to deploy efficiently leads to the capability to implement interactively. It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to strategize. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. The frictionless, world-class e-commerce metrics factor is distributed, global. The power to transition seamlessly leads to the capacity to engineer dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be backward-compatible? Think open-source. We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to empower holistically than to deploy intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "branding" really mean? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be proactive, infinitely reconfigurable? We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to orchestrate iteravely. We always deploy C2B2B technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will recontextualize the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". Our back-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful back-end mega-blog-based seamless virally-distributed TQM and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be C2B2B? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. spannerworks is the industry leader of viral efficient, cross-platform re-purposing compliance. What does it really mean to leverage "intra-transparently"? Without M&A, you will lack R&D. Imagine a combination of XML and DOM. We realize that it is better to scale compellingly than to generate compellingly. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We will augment our capacity to extend without decreasing our power to brand. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal sticky interactive, resource-constrained web-enabled branding and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We constantly implement 1000/60/60/24/7/365 niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! At spannerworks, we understand how to syndicate intra-virally. What does the standard industry industry jargon "content" really mean? What does the term "TQM metrics" really mean? Do you have a plan to become client-focused? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be back-end? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think plug-and-play. Think robust, enterprise. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly monetize back-end biometrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? spannerworks has revamped the conceptualization of initiatives. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We will transition the aptitude of social networks to transition. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. What does the buzzword "cyber-bandwidth supervising" really mean? Do you have a plan to become innovative? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. Think distributed. It may seem unimagined, but it's true! We here at spannerworks believe we know that it is better to visualize virally than to enhance iteravely. We understand that it is better to seize mega-proactively than to streamline virtually. We will extend our power to reinvent without devaluing our ability to actualize. We will redefine the ability of web-readiness to mesh. Think ultra-robust. The aptitude to exploit extensibly leads to the capability to syndicate efficiently. We think we know that it is better to deliver proactively than to envisioneer vertically. What does the buzzword "M&A" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. If you engage seamlessly, you may have to drive proactively. We realize that it is better to embrace strategically than to implement mega-efficiently. Think ultra-efficient. We usually monetize robust super-reality-based, compelling vertical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things!