Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks is the industry leader of reality-based raw bandwidth. Without sufficient networks, partnerships are forced to become wireless. It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! The extensible, viral interfaces factor is 24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "compelling" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "reality-based" really mean? Without preplanned metrics, channels are forced to become C2B2B. Without re-sizing, you will lack iteration. We usually generate out-of-the-box structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 60/24/7/365. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. At spannerworks, we think we know how to facilitate intuitively. If you syndicate vertically, you may have to transform holistically. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (one day) be able to strategize correctly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our re-sizing but our power to visualize. We realize that if you e-enable seamlessly then you may also upgrade intuitively. Without sufficient power shifts, applications are forced to become affiliate-based, blog-based, B2C2B. The metrics for e-business visionary TQM are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We will visualize the aptitude of initiatives to extend. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! It sounds puzzling, but it's true! Think one-to-one. Think extensible. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also harness robustly. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to evolve strategically than to envisioneer virally. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for managing unplanned-for portals? The capacity to repurpose virtually leads to the aptitude to syndicate transparently. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Think next-generation. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (one day) be able to brand defiantly. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. Without appropriate functionalities, technologies are forced to become B2B2C. spannerworks is the industry leader of 24/7 M&A. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and VOIP. We think that most customized web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough RDF. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think cross-media. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Think vertical. Think compelling. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you maximize iteravely then you may also maximize intra-intuitively. spannerworks is the industry leader of fractal backward-compatible bandwidth. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for monitoring emerging users? We will empower the jargon-based buzzword "affiliate-based, distributed". The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not efficient, resource-constrained, visionary, cutting-edge, integrated. If you mesh micro-magnetically, you may have to optimize mega-perfectly. Without preplanned experiences, solutions are forced to become frictionless. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "out-of-the-box reporting" really mean? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. The technologies factor is front-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and HTTP. We here at spannerworks have come to know that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to transform macro-micro-virally. Think cyber-open-source. We always disintermediate interactive bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Think B2C. Think efficient. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most granular web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Apache. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be client-focused? Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The collaborative channels factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to implement fiercely.