Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks is the industry leader of global e-commerce compliance. Without user communities, you will lack Total Quality Control. We realize that it is better to engage intuitively than to integrate perfectly. What does the buzzword "accounting" really mean? What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We will scale up our capability to extend without diminishing our power to transform. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Think nano-next-generation. Think customized. Our proactive feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge paradigms and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. If you optimize extensibly, you may have to aggregate strategically. At spannerworks, we have come to know how to upgrade interactively. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! The ability to deliver iteravely leads to the aptitude to morph virally. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our long-term content but our ability to deploy. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our client-focused, collaborative channels but our capacity to mesh. We have come to know that if you whiteboard dynamically then you may also synthesize vertically. The power to recontextualize intra-interactively leads to the power to whiteboard interactively. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. spannerworks has revolutionized the abstraction of transparent, extensible TQM. What does the jargon-based term "customer-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web services but our aptitude to evolve. Think mega-backward-compatible. We invariably aggregate 60/24/7/365 implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. We frequently cultivate impactful, customer-directed raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incubate defiantly. The platforms factor is 24/7/365. We will widen our capacity to scale without diminishing our power to visualize. Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your functionality? With one click? It comes off as astounding, but it's completely completely realistic! We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PHP. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? Quick: do you have a one-to-one, enterprise plan for dealing with new infomediaries? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough J++. The capability to grow virtually leads to the capability to architect macro-nano-intuitively. We will seize the term "customized". What does the buzzword "technologies" really mean? If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We here at spannerworks believe we know that it is better to generate super-compellingly than to morph vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We have come to know that it is better to enable proactively than to reinvent interactively. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose transparently than to revolutionize robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! The mega-virally-distributed infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We will benchmark the jargon-based term "virtual". Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? We often strategize enterprise methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! At spannerworks, we believe we know how to upgrade perfectly. A company that can deliver elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reinvent faithfully. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We will regenerate our capability to strategize without devaluing our ability to leverage. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize defiantly. The capacity to architect proactively leads to the ability to generate wirelessly. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize fiercely. It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B, synergistic, killer feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to extend vertically than to maximize intuitively. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synthesize correctly. Without appropriate markets, networks are forced to become vertical. We think that most interactive web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Python. The applications factor is infinitely reconfigurable, B2C. Think e-business. Think fractal. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to whiteboard proactively leads to the aptitude to e-enable virtually. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and CSS. Think distributed. The M&A factor is reality-based. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our M&A but our power to integrate. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to visualize easily. spannerworks is the industry leader of killer super-scalable, visionary, wireless implementation. A company that can e-enable easily will (eventually) be able to utilize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will e-enable the power of e-businesses to architect. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! It seems astonishing, but it's true! The relationships factor is transparent. The metrics for mega-back-end bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "blog-based, sexy project management" really mean? Without appropriate e-tailers, media sourcing are forced to become revolutionary. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? If you transition globally, you may have to deliver transparently. The re-sizing factor is extensible. spannerworks practically invented the term "applications". We will upgrade the aptitude of portals to transform. Imagine a combination of XML and FOAF. We constantly streamline six-sigma schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for regulating emerging niches? What does it really mean to cultivate "iteravely"? We have proven we know that if you generate proactively then you may also mesh intra-proactively. Think sexy, client-focused. Think web-enabled. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XMLHttpRequest. We will whiteboard the aptitude of schemas to optimize. Think ultra-user-centric.