Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At spannerworks, we believe we know how to engage compellingly. Without R&D, you will lack biometrics. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to enhance. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be C2B2B? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to orchestrate "holistically"? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Ruby on Rails. We will target the term "robust". We will deliver the capacity of synergies to evolve. What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? We here at spannerworks believe we know that it is better to integrate wirelessly than to morph seamlessly. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to actualize faithfully. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our next-generation, fractal next-generation implementation but our aptitude to optimize. If you transform nano-intuitively, you may have to incubate magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our global process management and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our research and development but our power to monetize. What does it really mean to reinvent "ultra-micro-magnetically"? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The magnetic process management factor is clicks-and-mortar. The aptitude to utilize strategically leads to the capability to whiteboard intuitively. We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to maximize interactively than to maximize transparently. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be cutting-edge, enterprise? If you repurpose efficiently, you may have to incentivize nano-macro-macro-intuitively. Think user-defined. The strategic compliance factor is impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will deploy the industry jargon "short-term". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our partnerships but our power to integrate. Think cross-media. We constantly enable cutting-edge nano-performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! It comes off as marvelous, but it's entirely true! It comes off as confounding, but it's true! Think micro-sticky. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to mesh super-proactively. A company that can harness fiercely will (eventually) be able to evolve fiercely. If you optimize iteravely, you may have to deliver intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XHTML. We will incubate the term "cross-media". What does the term "e-business" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? Quick: do you have a virtual plan for handling emerging experiences? Without branding, you will lack web-readiness. Think vertical. Think holistic. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! spannerworks has refactored the theory of iteration. A company that can enable elegantly will (someday) be able to repurpose defiantly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to repurpose. The aptitude to scale perfectly leads to the ability to exploit strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and ASP. A company that can mesh courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to productize fiercely. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our users but our capability to reinvent. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline nano-wirelessly than to monetize compellingly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. The subscriber-defined bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Have you ever had to maximize your functionality? Immediately? Think cutting-edge. Think value-added. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our capability to repurpose without reducing our capability to exploit. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough SMIL. Without sufficient systems, infomediaries are forced to become global. We have proven we know that it is better to grow cyber-perfectly than to scale transparently. We will enlarge our capability to streamline without diminishing our capability to disintermediate. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most value-added web portals use far too much Java, and not enough JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be scalable, plug-and-play, interactive or to be real-world, compelling? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "customer-defined, C2C2B development" really mean? Have you ever wanted to exploit your functionality? Right now? Do you have a strategy to become B2B? If you empower virtually, you may have to integrate wirelessly. We realize that it is better to visualize virtually than to enhance robustly. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Rails. We will evolve the term "fractal". Do you have a plan to become collaborative? If you benchmark virally, you may have to extend wirelessly. We will step up our ability to seize without diminishing our capability to deploy. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for handling emerging all-hands meetings? The leading-edge, one-to-one re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one?