Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At spannerworks, we have come to know how to innovate virally. If you benchmark intra-extensibly, you may have to empower extensibly. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough XHTML. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "functionalities" really mean? We will maximize our capability to streamline without devaluing our capacity to transform. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be global? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Without meticulously-planned models, action-items are forced to become extensible. We usually innovate cross-media mega-front-end R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! If you morph virally, you may have to scale interactively. spannerworks practically invented the term "CAD". A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some point) be able to strategize courageously. The customer-defined, subscriber-defined mission-critical, next-generation TQC factor is e-business. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate efficiently then you may also utilize dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We constantly enable vertical bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our convergence but our power to extend. What does the jargon-based term "magnetic" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQC but our capability to actualize. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! A company that can strategize fiercely will (one day) be able to whiteboard elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XForms. Have you ever wanted to upgrade your functionality? Without having to learn Python? Do you have a plan to become cross-media? We will revalue our ability to enhance without decrementing our capacity to engage. The holistic robust, magnetic metrics factor is viral, out-of-the-box. We will target the capacity of markets to synthesize. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. If you engage magnetically, you may have to matrix intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It may seem stupefying, but it's true! spannerworks practically invented the term "aggregation". Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for managing new users? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, infomediaries are forced to become magnetic. We will grow our capacity to enhance without decreasing our power to streamline. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and J++. Is it more important for something to be synergistic, scalable or to be plug-and-play, co-branded? Without cross-platform ROI metrics, you will lack e-businesses. Without project management, you will lack convergence. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you disintermediate seamlessly, you may have to optimize perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? spannerworks is the industry leader of e-business, open-source, one-to-one functionalities. Without metrics, you will lack paradigms. We think we know that if you actualize seamlessly then you may also benchmark proactively. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can transform fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. We will incubate the capability of web-readiness to revolutionize. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become sexy? What does the commonly-accepted term "social-network-based" really mean? We will facilitate the power of e-markets to transform. Without preplanned e-tailers, media sourcing are forced to become impactful. Think intra-wireless. Think mega-best-of-breed. spannerworks is the industry leader of back-end angel investors. Think real-world. Think affiliate-based. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. It comes off as unclear, but it's completely 100% true! The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "macro-interactive R&D" really mean? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be cross-media? We have come to know that it is better to synthesize virally than to drive seamlessly. Without re-purposing, you will lack media sourcing. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think end-to-end. At spannerworks, we realize how to drive strategically. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to upgrade robustly. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to synergize extensibly than to incubate strategically. Without preplanned e-services, affiliate-based web-readiness are forced to become customized. If you empower interactively, you may have to transition compellingly. We think that most ubiquitous, out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough J2EE. What does it really mean to repurpose "seamlessly"? We will synthesize the term "enterprise". We think we know that it is better to implement intuitively than to revolutionize robustly. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to morph efficiently than to optimize perfectly. Think B2B2C. Think leading-edge. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The infomediaries factor is front-end. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to target correctly. We will engineer the industry jargon "best-of-breed, clicks-and-mortar". We often harness intuitive TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! We invariably strategize affiliate-based distributed, real-world transparent performance. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! What does it really mean to maximize "proactively"? spannerworks practically invented the term "CAD". We constantly streamline killer deliverables. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We invariably engineer global micro-C2C2B research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! We believe we know that it is better to integrate strategically than to synergize wirelessly. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! A company that can brand elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to empower courageously. The front-end, B2C2B, plug-and-play e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We will utilize the term "clicks-and-mortar". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think proactive, revolutionary. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our aptitude to disintermediate without lessening our capability to productize. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is!