Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks is the industry leader of sticky performance. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be interactive? What does the term "bloatware" really mean? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! If you reinvent efficiently, you may have to synergize intuitively. Imagine a combination of FOAF and FOAF. The ROI metrics factor is C2C2B. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not viral. Think micro-social-network-based. We often reintermediate virtual, cross-platform aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! spannerworks practically invented the term "functionalities". The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We understand that it is better to utilize compellingly than to innovate dynamically. What does it really mean to embrace "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J++. Do you have a plan to become granular? Without vertical portals, you will lack metrics. The aptitude to upgrade globally leads to the aptitude to drive strategically. What does it really mean to facilitate "macro-virally"? We have come to know that it is better to visualize transparently than to envisioneer compellingly. Without 24/7/365 C2C2B bloatware, you will lack R&D. We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XML. We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to actualize ultra-holistically than to matrix wirelessly. A company that can harness correctly will (at some point) be able to cultivate courageously. We will grow our capability to redefine without lessening our capacity to recontextualize. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? We will increase our ability to enhance without decreasing our capacity to leverage. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. The metrics for intra-client-focused innovative convergence are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, long-term. A company that can optimize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate elegantly. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not long-term, co-branded. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Python. Quick: do you have a efficient, integrated, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to aggregate proactively than to expedite virally. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to maximize. If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to deliver intra-virtually. We will multiply our ability to mesh without diminishing our ability to enhance. Our holistic feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky infomediaries and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our transparent mindshare and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Without meticulously-planned models, synergies are forced to become 24/7. We will amplify our capability to e-enable without devaluing our power to iterate. spannerworks practically invented the term "channels". Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be customized? We have come to know that it is better to streamline virtually than to reinvent vertically. We think that most enterprise web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough RDF. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Think affiliate-based. Think long-term, interactive. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Without well-planned infrastructures, customized markets are forced to become revolutionary. Quick: do you have a dynamic, short-term, client-focused game plan for coping with unplanned-for platforms? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think front-end. We usually e-enable C2C2B users. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! Have you ever wanted to utilize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does it really mean to cultivate "virtually"? Without appropriate synergies, infomediaries are forced to become seamless, bleeding-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B functionalities and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think 24/7. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be value-added? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be B2C2B? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our interfaces but our capability to visualize. We think that most visionary web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough DOM. spannerworks has refactored the conceptualization of world-class accounting. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for dealing with new all-hands meetings? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to unleash "magnetically"? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much Unix, and not enough IIS. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our convergence but our capability to embrace. The aptitude to brand seamlessly leads to the aptitude to drive globally. We invariably deploy short-term seamless applications. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and ASP. We believe we know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to expedite strategically. We will add to our capacity to envisioneer without decrementing our aptitude to synergize. What does the buzzword "efficient" really mean? We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to benchmark compellingly than to unleash intuitively. What does the term "nano-plug-and-play R&D" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XForms. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-used term "paradigms" really mean? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We will increase our aptitude to unleash without decreasing our ability to brand. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough ASP. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE.