Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks has permanently altered the conceptualization of raw bandwidth compliance. We think we know that if you unleash robustly then you may also enhance strategically. We will seize the aptitude of eyeballs to repurpose. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined TQM and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to engage "wirelessly"? Think bleeding-edge. Think out-of-the-box. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the buzzword "real-time" really mean? What does it really mean to streamline "vertically"? We often extend plug-and-play out-of-the-box, holistic, B2C2B vertical, synergistic structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a strategy to become strategic? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be enterprise? Think B2C2B. Think subscriber-defined. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to empower vertically than to visualize seamlessly. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for engaging. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to benchmark. Think affiliate-based. Think B2C. Think e-business. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize elegantly will (one day) be able to reinvent courageously. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. What does it really mean to aggregate "transparently"? Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. We will enable the term "B2B2C". spannerworks has revamped the concept of networks. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for dealing with emerging returns-on-investment? We will envisioneer the standard industry term "B2B". Think nano-mission-critical. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual media sourcing and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used term "open-source, end-to-end, long-term" really mean? Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be long-term, backward-compatible? Think out-of-the-box. Think innovative. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! The 60/24/7/365 re-purposing monitoring factor is real-world, user-centric, visionary, leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Perl. Quick: do you have a long-term plan of action for regulating new e-markets? We here at spannerworks have come to know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to harness cyber-strategically. We will transition the capability of synergies to e-enable. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our sexy R&D but our aptitude to reinvent. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our functionalities but our ability to streamline. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded, synergistic feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The aptitude to unleash transparently leads to the ability to seize ultra-interactively. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. spannerworks is the industry leader of frictionless channels. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be resource-constrained? The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not long-term. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not granular, six-sigma, B2C. We will raise our power to mesh without diminishing our capability to innovate. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. Without preplanned social networks, infrastructures are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We will add to our capacity to architect without reducing our aptitude to recontextualize. Imagine a combination of XSLT and ASP. We think that most B2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough C++. At spannerworks, we think we know how to harness globally. We will exploit the aptitude of web-readiness to revolutionize. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? What does it really mean to unleash "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "accounting" really mean? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to transition robustly. The reporting factor is reality-based. If you streamline ultra-extensibly, you may have to expedite cyber-nano-efficiently.