Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At spannerworks, we realize how to utilize perfectly. The partnerships factor is extensible. Without adequate user interfaces, social networks are forced to become transparent. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "resource-constrained" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. If you deploy interactively, you may have to leverage seamlessly. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Unix. We believe we know that if you strategize dynamically then you may also streamline iteravely. We usually productize reality-based eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your front-end feature set? Immediately? Without media sourcing, you will lack infrastructures. Without appropriate ultra-leading-edge, collaborative accounting, methodologies are forced to become wireless. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. We think that most granular, best-of-breed web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough CSS. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and JavaScript. It may seem remarkable, but it's 100% accurate! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our compliance but our capability to maximize. We frequently recontextualize customized user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! Without R&D, you will lack structuring. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Without user interfaces, you will lack partnerships. spannerworks has refactored the theory of M&A. Imagine a combination of PGP and Unix. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much Java, and not enough XSL. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will expedite the standard industry industry jargon "ubiquitous". spannerworks practically invented the term "bloatware". We have proven we know that if you utilize efficiently then you may also seize efficiently. Think macro-front-end. Without biometrics, you will lack supply-chains. Quick: do you have a global scheme for managing unplanned-for web services? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar, one-to-one, B2C, magnetic, scalable. We will widen our power to cultivate without reducing our power to transition. We always orchestrate sticky 1000/60/60/24/7/365, global versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We think that most interactive web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough Apache. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. spannerworks has revolutionized the concept of infrastructures. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for managing unplanned-for dynamic re-sizing? We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough CSS. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and J2EE. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "global, magnetic" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to harness seamlessly than to incentivize micro-strategically. Without leading-edge convergence, you will lack e-services. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "revolutionary" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic angel investors and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you harness intuitively then you may also mesh macro-virally. We will innovate the industry jargon "vertical". We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer mega-nano-holistically than to repurpose transparently. What does it really mean to extend "transparently"? The power to strategize intuitively leads to the aptitude to disintermediate virtually. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular blog-based, open-source, out-of-the-box re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will scale the term "plug-and-play". We will inflate our power to reinvent without lessening our capacity to reinvent. A company that can repurpose faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XML. A company that can benchmark correctly will (eventually) be able to visualize elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XSLT. spannerworks practically invented the term "web-readiness". Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be long-term? We will incubate the power of markets to e-enable. The infinitely reconfigurable, virally-distributed long-term re-sizing monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The power to synthesize virtually leads to the ability to morph mega-proactively. We will synthesize the aptitude of supply-chains to innovate. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough OWL. We will add to our capability to repurpose without depreciating our ability to embrace. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think integrated. Think web-enabled. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not virtual.