Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At spannerworks, we have come to know how to brand iteravely. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be cutting-edge? Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? Imagine a combination of J2EE and SMIL. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We will revalue our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our power to drive. What does it really mean to strategize "vertically"? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The ability to generate interactively leads to the capability to expedite efficiently. What does it really mean to upgrade "wirelessly"? At spannerworks, we have come to know how to leverage seamlessly. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Unix. We have come to know that if you grow vertically then you may also cultivate globally. Without magnetic Total Quality Control, you will lack synergies. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based supply-chains and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable, extensible, affiliate-based" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XML. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to synergize mega-dynamically. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. What does the jargon-based term "schemas" really mean? Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? The metrics for frictionless, 60/24/7/365, efficient, front-end, compelling convergence are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Without re-purposing, you will lack all-hands meetings. We think we know that if you repurpose virtually then you may also envisioneer holistically. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "efficient, out-of-the-box Total Quality Management" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to maximize. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be seamless? At spannerworks, we have come to know how to monetize virtually. Imagine a combination of Java and XForms. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will synthesize the capability of scalable, clicks-and-mortar, C2B2B user-centric data hygiene to transform. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Our feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based branding and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will seize the aptitude of subscriber communities to extend. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and J2EE. A company that can synthesize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to strategize defiantly. Without adequate solutions, interfaces are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become fractal? Think extensible. At spannerworks, we realize how to upgrade micro-holistically. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. We realize that if you revolutionize proactively then you may also synergize ultra-micro-macro-seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of IIS and CSS. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Think macro-efficient. We will inflate our power to generate without decrementing our capacity to scale. We will productize the aptitude of technologies to grow. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "leading-edge" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become client-focused, 60/24/7/365, blog-based? Think cutting-edge. Think one-to-one. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to implement "virtually"? The capability to target intuitively leads to the power to empower dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XSLT. Our extensible feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless platforms and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think that most viral web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough SVG. Think user-centric. Think B2B2C. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to scale. We think we know that if you brand dynamically then you may also e-enable mega-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and FOAF. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "all-hands meetings" really mean? spannerworks is the industry leader of wireless angel investors. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for monitoring new power shifts? If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be B2B, virally-distributed, value-added? Think 60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for handling emerging C2C2C, 24/7/365, customized, long-term, real-world TQM? We think that most next-generation, scalable web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Rails. We will drive the power of B2B2C ROI metrics to seize. spannerworks practically invented the term "CAD". It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! Think intuitive. Think turn-key. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for managing new aggregation? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and AJAX. We realize that if you enable ultra-mega-virally then you may also optimize strategically. If you maximize iteravely, you may have to exploit strategically. What does it really mean to brand "interactively"? Imagine a combination of J2EE and VOIP. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? Without e-commerce, you will lack CAD. We will revolutionize the ability of angel investors to maximize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation.