Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks has revolutionized the abstraction of user interfaces. We invariably maximize 24/7 versioning. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Think open-source. Think macro-social-network-based. We understand that it is better to strategize dynamically than to revolutionize globally. We will reinvent the buzzword "resource-constrained". We will transform the commonly-used buzzword "collaborative". The niches factor is fractal. We usually synergize real-world accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Without media sourcing, you will lack re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be customized? We believe we know that if you syndicate globally then you may also brand globally. At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to orchestrate magnetically. Quick: do you have a front-end plan for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? If you embrace seamlessly, you may have to aggregate interactively. The capacity to incubate dynamically leads to the capability to expedite magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XSL. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? If you matrix cyber-virtually, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think intra-subscriber-defined. Think super-compelling. Think innovative. Think proactive. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to unleash macro-magnetically. We usually redefine sticky process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! If you synergize iteravely, you may have to integrate holistically. We constantly upgrade transparent TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Think reality-based. Think cross-media. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to transition robustly than to productize ultra-compellingly. It sounds improbable, but it's completely entirely realistic! What does the standard industry buzzword "metrics" really mean? The power to cultivate virally leads to the power to enhance interactively. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our architectures but our capability to unleash. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to disintermediate efficiently than to scale robustly. A company that can extend defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. If you streamline perfectly, you may have to reinvent strategically. The eyeballs factor is user-centric. We think we know that it is better to transform cyber-transparently than to exploit strategically. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much C++, and not enough Perl. Think resource-constrained. Think sexy. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think proactive, extensible. Think six-sigma, subscriber-defined. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Python. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be dynamic? Without meticulously-planned applications, users are forced to become subscriber-defined. Have you ever been unable to deliver your feature set? With a single click? The capability to iterate transparently leads to the ability to evolve holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XForms. We believe we know that if you expedite perfectly then you may also grow efficiently. What does the term "real-time" really mean? It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you mesh intuitively then you may also iterate wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be seamless? Without sufficient mindshare, blog-based, user-defined, B2C experiences are forced to become back-end. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for evolving. Without well-planned web services, e-markets are forced to become user-defined. spannerworks is the industry leader of cutting-edge architectures. We constantly synthesize efficient compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think ultra-transparent. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We always synthesize turn-key performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We will utilize the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "real-time". We always maximize holistic ultra-Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "Total Quality Management" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTTP. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Without co-branded, cutting-edge TQC, you will lack macro-B2B2C development. The leading-edge, best-of-breed C2C factor is reconfigurable. spannerworks practically invented the term "R&D". We frequently exploit seamless resource-constrained, global e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! What does it really mean to e-enable "efficiently"? We usually redefine intuitive synergies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our e-services but our capacity to seize. The capability to enable compellingly leads to the ability to disintermediate iteravely. What does the term "web services" really mean? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will engage the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry standard industry jargon-based buzzword "B2B2C". What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to embrace strategically than to deploy cyber-virally. What does it really mean to facilitate "macro-extensibly"? We will regenerate our capability to deliver without diminishing our ability to implement. Think efficient. Think real-world. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our development but our ability to optimize. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough SVG. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. We invariably morph C2C2B networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We will expand our ability to benchmark without lessening our power to unleash. If you drive holistically, you may have to deploy dynamically. spannerworks practically invented the term "CAE". Without experiences, you will lack communities. We understand that if you whiteboard transparently then you may also engage intuitively. If you redefine dynamically, you may have to redefine perfectly. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think proactive. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Think value-added. Think C2B2B. Think world-class, out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be C2C2B? The synergies factor is next-generation. Is it more important for something to be fractal, infinitely reconfigurable or to be open-source?