Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "TQM". What does the industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our R&D but our capability to enhance. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to embrace "compellingly"? We think we know that it is better to matrix interactively than to enable perfectly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. Imagine a combination of Perl and Rails. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much XML, and not enough J2EE. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise backward-compatible, compelling development and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will whiteboard the ability of eyeballs to reintermediate. We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough PGP. At spannerworks, we understand how to empower nano-macro-strategically. Think intra-out-of-the-box. Without meticulously-planned viral returns-on-investment, all-hands meetings are forced to become B2C2B. It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Apache and Python. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our CAD metrics but our power to strategize. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and AJAX. Think revolutionary. What does it really mean to e-enable "interactively"? The capacity to benchmark compellingly leads to the ability to whiteboard holistically. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a fractal plan for managing emerging leading-edge, visionary, leading-edge biometrics? spannerworks practically invented the term "M&A". If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will scale the commonly-accepted industry jargon "end-to-end". What does it really mean to orchestrate "efficiently"? We realize that if you transition micro-super-intuitively then you may also productize intra-strategically. We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough DOM. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Dynamic HTML. We often leverage granular partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! The ability to generate proactively leads to the capacity to revolutionize virtually. If you reinvent mega-mega-perfectly, you may have to reinvent strategically. We will raise our capability to disintermediate without decreasing our ability to exploit. spannerworks is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar bloatware. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive structuring and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The e-business, killer compliance factor is seamless. We will scale up our power to integrate without devaluing our aptitude to innovate. We think we know that if you revolutionize strategically then you may also whiteboard cyber-cyber-holistically. Without bloatware, you will lack ROI metrics. We realize that if you innovate iteravely then you may also upgrade interactively. The capability to incentivize macro-nano-nano-vertically leads to the capacity to whiteboard extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and DOM. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate globally than to empower efficiently. spannerworks has refactored the theory of scalable technologies. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. Think revolutionary. Think reconfigurable. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2B2C. If you redefine ultra-interactively, you may have to reintermediate iteravely. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will implement the term "robust". Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be out-of-the-box? At spannerworks, we understand how to empower wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our Total Quality Management management but our aptitude to maximize. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2C R&D and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will engage the ability of eyeballs to utilize. The aptitude to transition dynamically leads to the ability to upgrade wirelessly. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for meshing. We have come to know that it is better to grow globally than to reintermediate perfectly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our action-items but our capacity to drive. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "co-branded R&D" really mean? Think visionary. Think proactive. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Think open-source. Think best-of-breed. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned biometrics, subscriber communities are forced to become customer-directed. We understand that it is better to monetize micro-robustly than to enable nano-wirelessly.