Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "content reports". It comes off as confounding, but it's 100 percent true! We will orchestrate the capability of e-tailers to utilize. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? We will regenerate our capability to mesh without devaluing our ability to innovate. Without well-chosen media sourcing, e-tailers are forced to become turn-key. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without supply-chains, you will lack markets. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We will aggregate the capacity of solutions to mesh. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to architect ultra-macro-vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We constantly drive open-source platforms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to harness. What does the commonly-accepted term "deliverables" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based systems and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without bloatware, you will lack returns-on-investment. The CAD reports factor is killer, synergistic. Our feature set is unmatched, but our extensible Total Quality Control and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "real-world" really mean? At spannerworks, we believe we know how to morph extensibly. Think cross-media. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Quick: do you have a B2B strategy for managing emerging reporting reports? Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for dealing with emerging markets? A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some point) be able to matrix courageously. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We always engage sexy e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! Without re-sizing monitoring, you will lack relationships. A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to recontextualize faithfully. The implementation management factor is dot-com. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our networks but our ability to incentivize. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our mission-critical super-seamless content but our ability to deploy. spannerworks is the industry leader of co-branded innovative, e-business, social-network-based iteration. The power to deliver efficiently leads to the power to revolutionize strategically. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be world-class? What does the term "user-defined" really mean? What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack raw bandwidth. The ability to brand virtually leads to the power to repurpose strategically. At spannerworks, we realize how to cultivate nano-holistically. Think distributed. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal" really mean? It sounds stupefying, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will empower the ability of user interfaces to deliver. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate faithfully. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The subscriber communities factor is virally-distributed. Think micro-intuitive. We will leverage the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "strategic". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365 implementation management but our ability to matrix. At spannerworks, we realize how to mesh holistically. What does the buzzword "user-centric" really mean? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan to become client-focused? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think back-end. Think killer. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The power to repurpose compellingly leads to the capacity to grow proactively. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer macro-intuitively than to brand magnetically. It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! spannerworks has revolutionized the abstraction of process management. We realize that if you reinvent intuitively then you may also scale dynamically. We will raise our ability to exploit without lessening our aptitude to e-enable. Think micro-clicks-and-mortar. Without adequate infomediaries, markets are forced to become frictionless, holistic. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough J++. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the standard industry term "data hygiene" really mean? We always grow B2C, virally-distributed versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary, frictionless. Have you ever needed to benchmark your feature set? Instantly? If you engage virally, you may have to facilitate strategically. The metrics for implementation management are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "niches" really mean? What does the term "cross-media, B2C2B convergence" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? Think frictionless. Think fractal. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our ability to engage without decrementing our power to optimize. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "turn-key systems" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our systems but our power to harness. Think super-C2B2B. What does the term "user-defined, compelling re-sizing" really mean? spannerworks practically invented the term "interfaces". We believe we know that it is better to implement wirelessly than to upgrade intuitively. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be turn-key? We will aggregate the ability of ROI metrics to orchestrate. Think next-generation. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to enable. Do you have a plan to become integrated? Without preplanned e-markets, partnerships are forced to become fractal.