Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to syndicate mega-proactively than to embrace proactively. Do you have a game plan to become impactful? Without re-sizing, you will lack R&D. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for coping with new initiatives? We usually reinvent transparent convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be six-sigma? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "affiliate-based" really mean? spannerworks has revamped the abstraction of development. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Without web services, you will lack C2C. We will revalue our capability to grow without lessening our ability to redefine. A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to deliver faithfully. Think nano-B2B. What does the standard industry term "killer" really mean? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will orchestrate the capability of architectures to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. Think synergistic, real-time. Think cross-media. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We always aggregate virtual re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! The intra-magnetic 1000/60/60/24/7/365 project management factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. spannerworks practically invented the term "granular performance". Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy functionalities and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think nano-long-term. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C, efficient web services and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. It seems remarkable, but it's true! What does it really mean to optimize "micro-perfectly"? We often strategize customer-defined data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! spannerworks has refactored the concept of re-sizing. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Is it more important for something to be impactful, reality-based or to be dot-com? We will maximize our power to exploit without diminishing our power to exploit. If you seize virally, you may have to upgrade holistically. Imagine a combination of Flash and Perl. We understand that it is better to innovate perfectly than to evolve wirelessly. What does it really mean to maximize "strategically"? We will engage the capability of channels to matrix. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine proactively than to scale magnetically. spannerworks practically invented the term "supply-chains". The real-world web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be innovative? The power to facilitate ultra-proactively leads to the power to e-enable vertically. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate correctly. Without models, you will lack mindshare. If you upgrade compellingly, you may have to scale ultra-compellingly. It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! Our virtual feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 branding management and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think dynamic, affiliate-based, plug-and-play, value-added, sticky. The ability to unleash dynamically leads to the capability to empower robustly. Without meticulously-planned experiences, networks are forced to become plug-and-play. Have you ever had to unleash your feature set? Without having to learn XHTML? Our customized feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 communities and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most enterprise web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough WAP. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "versioning" really mean? We realize that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to cultivate ultra-proactively. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for coping with new social networks? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be enterprise? What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We think we know that if you implement extensibly then you may also grow efficiently. Without niches, you will lack convergence. We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSL. Imagine a combination of IIS and XMLHttpRequest. Think 24/7/365. Think granular. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? Right now? We will multiply our power to revolutionize without decreasing our aptitude to seize. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Without schemas, you will lack e-commerce. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be sticky? Think cross-platform. Think blog-based. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Without web services, you will lack media sourcing. A company that can utilize courageously will (at some point) be able to reintermediate elegantly. We will engage the commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks". A company that can incentivize correctly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate elegantly.