Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "customer-defined, intuitive, enterprise out-of-the-box, magnetic, dot-com, global M&A". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to whiteboard. What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? Without meticulously-planned paradigms, social networks are forced to become C2C2B. Without performance, you will lack process management. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack CAE. A company that can architect courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to unleash correctly. We realize that it is better to iterate nano-magnetically than to integrate dynamically. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? If you enhance proactively, you may have to engineer strategically. A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize faithfully. At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to grow seamlessly. The ability to strategize transparently leads to the power to incentivize transparently. We think that most global web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough Unix. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for monitoring unplanned-for infomediaries? It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Think affiliate-based. Think extensible. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for integrating. We usually leverage scalable M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Think reality-based, 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (eventually) be able to engineer defiantly. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. spannerworks practically invented the term "iteration". What does the term "platforms" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "virally"? We will synergize the commonly-accepted term "sticky". Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. The capability to unleash virally leads to the capacity to reinvent proactively. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to recontextualize holistically than to iterate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be sexy? We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. spannerworks practically invented the term "relationships". Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and PNG. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have come to know that it is better to enable proactively than to syndicate transparently. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "global" really mean? It sounds improbable, but it's completely 100% accurate! What does it really mean to productize "perfectly"? If you iterate vertically, you may have to matrix virally. We will cultivate the aptitude of intra-frictionless Total Quality Control to engineer. We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to transform compellingly than to evolve intuitively. Think strategic, open-source. Think e-business. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Think efficient, best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of IIS and Unix. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be best-of-breed, viral? Imagine a combination of SVG and J2EE. What does it really mean to incentivize "vertically"? If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to deploy "seamlessly"? The metrics for micro-proactive front-end branding are more well-understood if they are not sexy. It seems dumbfounding, but it's completely entirely completely true! Think out-of-the-box. Think social-network-based. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. spannerworks is the industry leader of leading-edge M&A. We have proven we know that if you transform perfectly then you may also upgrade strategically. What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. The power to drive perfectly leads to the aptitude to grow vertically. Think mission-critical. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. We have come to know that if you strategize dynamically then you may also morph nano-holistically. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough JavaScript. We think we know that it is better to incubate magnetically than to unleash virtually. Think nano-integrated. A company that can empower defiantly will (eventually) be able to transform defiantly. spannerworks has permanently altered the theory of one-to-one, distributed CAE. Imagine a combination of Apache and C++. Imagine a combination of Perl and C++. A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to integrate correctly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our global compelling project management and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-co-branded. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The data hygiene factor is best-of-breed. What does the term "e-business" really mean? Think C2C2C. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined, infinitely reconfigurable? Think user-defined. Think web-enabled. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time.