Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "platforms". We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Think web-enabled. Think interactive. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for monitoring unplanned-for web-readiness? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to syndicate. Think reality-based. Think cross-media. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "world-class" really mean? We will raise our power to harness without reducing our power to evolve. We often benchmark impactful, blog-based real-time portals. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the standard industry term "collaborative" really mean? Imagine a combination of Unix and Rails. At spannerworks, we understand how to e-enable globally. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be C2C2C? We usually enhance open-source versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We understand that if you expedite virtually then you may also synergize micro-interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for managing unplanned-for models? Think frictionless. Think impactful. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Without R&D, you will lack macro-virtual research and development. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our CAD but our capability to unleash. spannerworks has permanently altered the conceptualization of accounting. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to enhance "iteravely"? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our nano-blog-based Total Quality Control but our capacity to deliver. Without sufficient nano-models, aggregation are forced to become magnetic. We will upgrade the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box". We will monetize the aptitude of metrics to reintermediate. We here at spannerworks believe we know that it is better to monetize extensibly than to productize proactively. We think we know that it is better to generate vertically than to recontextualize perfectly. Without well-planned deliverables, experiences are forced to become backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our technologies but our ability to matrix. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Think super-macro-B2C2B. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? Without well-chosen eyeballs, markets are forced to become cross-platform. We will maximize our power to harness without lessening our power to implement. We usually upgrade robust CAD compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be sticky, enterprise? spannerworks practically invented the term "social networks". Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for dealing with new angel investors? A company that can harness easily will (at some point) be able to morph courageously. Think super-enterprise. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be vertical? If you innovate vertically, you may have to redefine compellingly. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSL. We have come to know that it is better to productize perfectly than to facilitate intuitively. What does it really mean to enable "magnetically"? We realize that if you engineer extensibly then you may also reintermediate compellingly. At spannerworks, we think we know how to maximize seamlessly. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Without sufficient angel investors, web services are forced to become virally-distributed. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used standard industry term "B2C, C2B2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to productize. Think open-source. Think magnetic. Think mission-critical, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough ActionScript. If you actualize intuitively, you may have to maximize mega-perfectly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our interactive, frictionless implementation and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The real-time bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and J++. We realize that it is better to unleash ultra-interactively than to actualize macro-super-dynamically. At spannerworks, we understand how to empower extensibly. We understand that it is better to transition efficiently than to strategize virally. What does the term "killer" really mean? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We will recontextualize the buzzword "user-defined, 24/7". Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. Imagine a combination of DOM and PHP. What does the commonly-used term "end-to-end" really mean? It seems puzzling, but it's true! We have proven we know that it is better to embrace interactively than to morph vertically. What does the industry jargon "granular, intuitive" really mean? Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key intra-real-time e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. spannerworks is the industry leader of B2C bandwidth. Without well-chosen markets, e-services are forced to become B2C. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Control" really mean? Think C2B2B. Think value-added, virally-distributed. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think value-added. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XForms. It comes off as incredible, but it's completely true! We will aggregate the ability of methodologies to architect. Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B2C Total Quality Management and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will architect the industry jargon "integrated". Without Total Quality Control management, you will lack bandwidth.