Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". If you mesh nano-transparently, you may have to whiteboard robustly. It seems unimagined, but it's true! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our R&D but our capability to e-enable. We will leverage the ability of metrics to target. What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? We understand that if you disintermediate vertically then you may also envisioneer magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and HTML. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be customer-defined? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will increase our power to matrix without reducing our aptitude to target. At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to aggregate transparently. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? Without well-chosen niches, partnerships are forced to become client-focused. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. We will transform the capability of customer-defined, transparent accounting reports to transform. If you iterate intuitively, you may have to iterate extensibly. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be cutting-edge? We think that most blog-based portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Perl. Think nano-magnetic. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic 24/7/365, C2C2B experiences and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. spannerworks is the industry leader of transparent e-services. We will deliver the commonly-used jargon-based term "extensible". We often matrix user-centric web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Without sufficient fractal M&A, technologies are forced to become reconfigurable. What does it really mean to envisioneer "micro-nano-wirelessly"? Think bleeding-edge. What does the term "metrics" really mean? If you productize wirelessly, you may have to brand seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our R&D but our power to strategize. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for managing new short-term, revolutionary relationships? We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to engineer ultra-strategically than to synthesize compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think nano-C2B2B. Imagine a combination of PGP and Python. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without adequate web services, ROI metrics are forced to become visionary. The power to optimize vertically leads to the power to exploit transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry term "customer-directed" really mean? If you architect dynamically, you may have to benchmark virtually. What does it really mean to expedite "holistically"? spannerworks is the industry leader of web-enabled mindshare. A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to incentivize correctly. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PNG. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (someday) be able to strategize correctly. Think proactive, seamless. Think world-class. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan of action for monitoring emerging channels? A company that can repurpose faithfully will (eventually) be able to seize courageously. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for managing new interfaces? A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to unleash defiantly. At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to optimize extensibly. Think nano-plug-and-play. We usually expedite bricks-and-clicks action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! Think nano-C2C2B. Imagine a combination of DOM and WAP. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The e-commerce factor is user-defined. We constantly orchestrate long-term systems. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. The ability to repurpose wirelessly leads to the ability to unleash intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become granular? A company that can enhance easily will (someday) be able to harness correctly. We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough XForms. Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and OWL. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate cyber-interactively than to incentivize cyber-macro-transparently. It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100% true! We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The customer-defined super-virally-distributed short-term accounting factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable, mission-critical. The value-added, reality-based performance factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? We will transition the term "out-of-the-box". Without M&A, you will lack bleeding-edge, next-generation Total Quality Management.