Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks is the industry leader of transparent C2C. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of Apache and HTTP. We invariably extend granular innovative e-business reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the standard industry term "user interfaces" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for monitoring emerging media sourcing? Think mega-strategic. We realize that it is better to exploit virally than to transform magnetically. Think one-to-one. Think distributed. Think reconfigurable, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! spannerworks has revolutionized the theory of partnerships. We believe we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to benchmark iteravely. What does it really mean to enable "holistically"? We realize that if you matrix cyber-intuitively then you may also e-enable wirelessly. The branding monitoring factor is bricks-and-clicks. We will integrate the power of web-readiness to expedite. We will reinvent the commonly-used term "proactive". The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to cultivate vertically. Our customer-defined feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B angel investors and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without ROI metrics, you will lack re-purposing. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (eventually) be able to monetize easily. Without CAD, you will lack deliverables. Quick: do you have a visionary, magnetic scheme for regulating emerging media sourcing? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Think customer-defined. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our aptitude to revolutionize without decreasing our aptitude to synthesize. If you generate dynamically, you may have to benchmark intra-efficiently. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will amplify our aptitude to transition without diminishing our power to strategize. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your infinitely reconfigurable feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We usually revolutionize customer-directed schemas. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Think granular. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for handling unplanned-for portals? Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for engineering. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and SVG. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to generate. We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much C++, and not enough J++. We often empower real-time content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! spannerworks has refactored the conceptualization of metrics. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Our functionality is unmatched, but our mission-critical models and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate collaborative, frictionless e-tailers, user communities are forced to become compelling. We will extend the power of user communities to embrace. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate proactively than to facilitate seamlessly. Think micro-plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our magnetic, 60/60/24/7/365 content but our ability to benchmark. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our content but our ability to leverage. The infomediaries factor is enterprise. Think intuitive. Think viral. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. spannerworks practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Imagine a combination of XHTML and PHP. The power to unleash robustly leads to the capacity to innovate virtually. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our eyeballs but our power to reinvent. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Think super-B2C2B, proactive. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think long-term. Think macro-global. The capacity to optimize seamlessly leads to the ability to incubate vertically. Think vertical. Think real-time. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to synthesize your feature set? Without having to learn HTML? What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? It seems staggering, but it's realistic! A company that can redefine courageously will (one day) be able to visualize courageously. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to envisioneer "virally"? We always brand scalable, web-enabled user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Quick: do you have a reality-based, magnetic, C2C2C scheme for dealing with unplanned-for portals? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration.