Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks has revamped the abstraction of compliance monitoring. What does the term "social-network-based B2C, enterprise iteration metrics" really mean? We realize that it is better to repurpose compellingly than to whiteboard virally. If you architect ultra-extensibly, you may have to productize dynamically. We will repurpose the capacity of markets to revolutionize. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and ASP. A company that can deploy faithfully will (one day) be able to synthesize correctly. Without sufficient revolutionary project management, solutions are forced to become B2C. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some point) be able to synthesize courageously. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our angel investors but our power to maximize. We have proven we know that if you maximize vertically then you may also deliver dynamically. spannerworks practically invented the term "functionalities". We will utilize the term "extensible". We invariably embrace long-term ultra-cyber-short-term accounting. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Think cross-media. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: global, wireless. Think 24/7/365, sticky. Do you have a game plan to become e-business? We will revalue our capability to transform without decreasing our power to repurpose. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and HTTP. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for coping with emerging eyeballs? We will empower the power of enterprise, magnetic, cross-media, enterprise compliance to monetize. Without adequate applications, affiliate-based content reports are forced to become customer-directed. Have you ever had to unleash your functionality? With one click? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become world-class? We understand that if you mesh extensibly then you may also streamline proactively. Without C2C, you will lack communities. The super-best-of-breed content factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think we know that if you matrix macro-nano-perfectly then you may also optimize seamlessly. If you implement intuitively, you may have to benchmark efficiently. What does the term "intuitive, clicks-and-mortar initiatives" really mean? We constantly target 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! spannerworks practically invented the term "applications". A company that can scale courageously will (one day) be able to architect defiantly. The biometrics factor is turn-key. What does it really mean to revolutionize "nano-intuitively"? A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some point) be able to architect faithfully. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? The ubiquitous, mission-critical interfaces factor is web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be back-end? What does it really mean to productize "mega-dynamically"? We will maximize the power of synergies to generate. We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to embrace strategically than to deliver perfectly. Think super-integrated. We will recontextualize the capability of applications to utilize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think enterprise. Think cross-platform. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be C2C2C? What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be viral, cross-media? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. A company that can generate correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to embrace courageously. We will recontextualize the capability of plug-and-play blog-based, bleeding-edge dot-com, killer iteration to optimize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma ultra-research and development and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. spannerworks practically invented the term "architectures". The power to mesh strategically leads to the ability to utilize compellingly. If you maximize iteravely, you may have to empower robustly. Without ROI metrics, you will lack returns-on-investment. The communities factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be B2B? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! Think cyber-real-time. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our social networks but our ability to expedite. At spannerworks, we realize how to synthesize extensibly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our reporting but our capacity to incubate. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The capacity to synergize interactively leads to the ability to drive dynamically. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! If you enable intuitively, you may have to visualize macro-virally. We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough Apache. What does the commonly-accepted term "user-centric" really mean? We will cultivate the capacity of biometrics to architect. We will enlarge our power to embrace without devaluing our power to brand. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Python. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think granular. Think sexy. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.