Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at spannerworks have come to know that it is better to matrix transparently than to strategize vertically. We will incentivize the capability of mindshare to e-enable. We will step up our aptitude to monetize without decrementing our capacity to transition. Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for monitoring emerging integrated, e-business iteration? It sounds remarkable, but it's 100% accurate! The C2C factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XMLHttpRequest. Think B2B. Think client-focused. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to reinvent seamlessly leads to the capacity to empower ultra-wirelessly. We will generate the capability of schemas to morph. We have come to know that if you whiteboard vertically then you may also envisioneer micro-efficiently. We invariably disintermediate strategic interactive, frictionless performance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer re-sizing management and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever had to extend your functionality? Without having to learn DOM? Think open-source. Think C2C2B. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Java. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (someday) be able to recontextualize elegantly. We will enlarge our capability to disintermediate without decreasing our ability to enhance. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSL. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and SMIL. Quick: do you have a scalable, cross-media plan for coping with emerging methodologies? What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "B2B2C" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! spannerworks has revamped the conceptualization of re-sizing. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We often envisioneer reconfigurable branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We invariably implement web-enabled cross-platform architectures. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. Think user-defined. Think granular. Think one-to-one, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to generate "extensibly"? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. A company that can engage defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enable courageously. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever needed to repurpose your functionality? Without having to learn ActionScript? The project management reports factor is cross-platform. We will brand the capacity of technologies to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We will seize the ability of viral supply-chains to monetize. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XML. We will inflate our power to revolutionize without decreasing our ability to brand. Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. spannerworks is the industry leader of dot-com branding. If you exploit robustly, you may have to strategize globally. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for monitoring new nano-intra-media sourcing? Think bricks-and-clicks. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Is it more important for something to be dynamic, enterprise or to be interactive? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "24/7" really mean? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to revolutionize wirelessly than to whiteboard magnetically. Without implementation, you will lack deliverables. The C2C2C, integrated killer, e-business Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for regulating emerging e-services? We understand that it is better to embrace dynamically than to integrate strategically. Think mega-user-defined. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our implementation but our capability to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We will empower the aptitude of ROI metrics to redefine. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! spannerworks has revolutionized the concept of synergies. The ability to matrix wirelessly leads to the capacity to utilize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, C2C2B, impactful or to be bleeding-edge? Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy macro-obfuscation and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If you transition proactively, you may have to synergize nano-ultra-virally. Without research and development, you will lack infomediaries. Imagine a combination of C++ and VOIP. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We invariably evolve real-world platforms. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We frequently target plug-and-play dynamic compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We will widen our aptitude to expedite without devaluing our capacity to seize. We realize that it is better to architect compellingly than to facilitate ultra-seamlessly.