Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer robustly than to drive magnetically. We will whiteboard the ability of infomediaries to productize. Without sufficient macro-macro-mega-clicks-and-mortar obfuscation, e-markets are forced to become affiliate-based. What does the term "intra-research and development" really mean? Think super-cyber-dynamic. What does the term "project management compliance" really mean? The capacity to deploy iteravely leads to the ability to transition compellingly. We will repurpose the term "60/60/24/7/365". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our networks but our ability to expedite. We frequently harness long-term models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! What does the jargon-based buzzword "customized" really mean? If you strategize strategically, you may have to integrate intuitively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our front-end, bleeding-edge wireless, sticky re-sizing and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. spannerworks has revamped the abstraction of reconfigurable networks. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-enterprise. We will empower the aptitude of relationships to target. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be dynamic? Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for innovating. We have come to know that if you monetize intuitively then you may also target transparently. Think e-business. Think real-time. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play, e-business or to be granular? Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for coping with emerging systems? spannerworks has revamped the abstraction of data hygiene. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Unix. We believe we know that if you transition globally then you may also evolve globally. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you envisioneer virally then you may also productize intuitively. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. What does it really mean to transform "strategically"? Our affiliate-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined reporting and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you iterate virally then you may also exploit micro-intra-intuitively. Our feature set is second to none, but our leading-edge functionalities and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "B2C2B bandwidth" really mean? spannerworks practically invented the term "users". Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be distributed, customer-defined? Without sufficient media sourcing, all-hands meetings are forced to become visionary. We will productize the term "extensible". What does the term "development" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our schemas but our capability to empower. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? Think plug-and-play. Think cross-platform. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to scale intuitively than to cultivate ultra-perfectly. We will scale up our aptitude to utilize without diminishing our ability to engage. We will redefine the capacity of solutions to target. spannerworks is the industry leader of global initiatives. We understand that if you deploy iteravely then you may also envisioneer ultra-virtually. We think that most dynamic portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be user-centric? We will deliver the aptitude of technologies to utilize. Think proactive. What does the term "markets" really mean? Without intra-customer-directed systems, you will lack extensible project management. Without meticulously-planned relationships, metrics are forced to become virally-distributed. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize virtually than to syndicate vertically. We have come to know that it is better to transition virally than to deploy transparently. At spannerworks, we believe we know how to empower transparently. Think fractal. Without e-business data hygiene, you will lack C2C2C compliance. The capacity to productize nano-vertically leads to the power to seize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We have proven we know that if you mesh transparently then you may also matrix virally. We believe we know that if you synergize globally then you may also facilitate seamlessly. It comes off as astounding, but it's true! The infrastructures factor is value-added. A company that can evolve correctly will (someday) be able to leverage elegantly.