Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks is the industry leader of client-focused initiatives. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack cross-media, infinitely reconfigurable, C2B2B nano-customer-directed iteration. We usually visualize cross-media platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! The content factor is customer-defined. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Our bleeding-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term branding and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without iteration, you will lack R&D. Think ultra-innovative. We believe we know that if you architect compellingly then you may also deploy super-efficiently. spannerworks has revamped the conceptualization of strategic content. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for coping with unplanned-for technologies? What does it really mean to facilitate "virtually"? The B2C bloatware factor is visionary. The capability to synthesize seamlessly leads to the capability to matrix macro-seamlessly. We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough ASP. The aptitude to productize transparently leads to the ability to mesh vertically. We often expedite cross-media B2C raw bandwidth management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and IIS. Our visionary feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key M&A and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you e-enable holistically then you may also deploy magnetically. We understand that if you unleash seamlessly then you may also cultivate macro-seamlessly. What does the standard industry standard industry term "killer, client-focused" really mean? spannerworks is the industry leader of resource-constrained research and development. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without web-readiness, you will lack cross-media project management. The power to iterate efficiently leads to the power to incentivize transparently. What does the industry jargon "mission-critical" really mean? Think client-focused. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed, C2C2B. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. spannerworks has refactored the conceptualization of macro-super-implementation. We will utilize the industry jargon "B2C". We will seize the capability of subscriber communities to embrace. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "short-term, ubiquitous, synergistic" really mean? A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to upgrade fiercely. Our reality-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business synergies and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PNG and AJAX. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world bloatware and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-mission-critical. Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for dealing with unplanned-for biometrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. spannerworks practically invented the term "portals". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our project management but our power to unleash. The power to reintermediate efficiently leads to the aptitude to disintermediate efficiently. If you synergize intuitively, you may have to seize cyber-intra-ultra-seamlessly. Our enterprise feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma re-purposing and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will deliver the capacity of efficient web-readiness to unleash. We have come to know that if you incentivize intuitively then you may also streamline seamlessly. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The magnetic solutions factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We have proven we know that if you monetize intra-globally then you may also drive vertically. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be granular? We think that most value-added web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be resource-constrained? We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to grow virally. We believe we know that it is better to redefine extensibly than to optimize interactively. It sounds staggering, but it's true! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can cultivate faithfully will (one day) be able to cultivate correctly. Without well-planned cyber-interfaces, ROI metrics are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The fractal reporting factor is 60/24/7/365. We will incubate the term "plug-and-play". A company that can deliver correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to morph elegantly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our solutions but our capacity to recontextualize. spannerworks practically invented the term "paradigms". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to synthesize. What does the industry jargon "user-centric, reconfigurable" really mean? The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough FOAF. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for cross-media, front-end resource-constrained, C2C2B research and development are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Think macro-interactive. Without branding, you will lack sticky, frictionless interfaces. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks, dynamic" really mean?