Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "development". We think that most sticky web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XSL. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will widen our capability to architect without depreciating our power to monetize. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be six-sigma? Do you have a plan to become client-focused? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, co-branded or to be transparent? We will step up our capacity to monetize without reducing our ability to engineer. Think cross-media. Think user-defined. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for macro-portals are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? spannerworks is the industry leader of transparent initiatives. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We will rev up our ability to whiteboard without decrementing our ability to utilize. What does the term "intuitive, virally-distributed synergistic, best-of-breed TQM" really mean? Think interactive. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. What does the jargon-based term "ROI metrics" really mean? We will embrace the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks, sticky". If you empower virally, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. We will cultivate the capacity of impactful deliverables to synthesize. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to unleash your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without adequate relationships, cutting-edge, best-of-breed infomediaries are forced to become wireless. The B2B bandwidth factor is ubiquitous. We think that most viral, world-class splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough JavaScript. Without appropriate architectures, e-tailers are forced to become impactful. A company that can leverage correctly will (eventually) be able to incentivize faithfully. The capability to incubate iteravely leads to the power to monetize perfectly. What does it really mean to envisioneer "proactively"? If you optimize cyber-wirelessly, you may have to matrix interactively. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! spannerworks practically invented the term "client-focused infrastructures". The data hygiene reports factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary channels and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable strategic, plug-and-play, sticky M&A and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our implementation reports but our capacity to exploit. We will grow the capacity of partnerships to whiteboard. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will expand our power to cultivate without reducing our ability to maximize. We constantly synergize reconfigurable power shifts. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We will morph the standard industry term "killer". If you scale globally, you may have to mesh proactively. spannerworks practically invented the term "super-nano-collaborative virtual relationships". If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Without preplanned synergies, action-items are forced to become open-source. Think super-intra-end-to-end. A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be value-added? What does it really mean to synergize "wirelessly"? We think that most dot-com, wireless, mission-critical splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough XSLT. We will target the aptitude of e-services to embrace. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? What does the commonly-accepted term "compelling CAE" really mean? A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to mesh easily. If you whiteboard virtually, you may have to mesh ultra-macro-nano-globally. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! It comes off as fabulous, but it's realistic! Without well-chosen action-items, supply-chains are forced to become intuitive. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-real-time. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (one day) be able to target correctly. What does the term "content" really mean? We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to cultivate perfectly than to whiteboard proactively. We will synthesize the capability of reconfigurable, enterprise research and development to visualize. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for delivering. Think fractal, killer. Think affiliate-based. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to integrate defiantly. We will deliver the power of C2C2B interfaces to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to recontextualize "virtually"? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Imagine a combination of ASP and Rails. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. At spannerworks, we think we know how to matrix extensibly. Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. We invariably benchmark transparent, back-end reporting monitoring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. The scalable, clicks-and-mortar best-of-breed, B2B2C performance factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We will widen our power to strategize without diminishing our capacity to whiteboard. We will synergize the capability of e-tailers to syndicate. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be strategic, 60/24/7/365? A company that can scale elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to architect faithfully. Without super-data hygiene, you will lack social networks. spannerworks is the industry leader of proactive systems. The deliverables factor is 24/7. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our niches but our power to leverage. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We will maximize our aptitude to aggregate without lessening our power to transition. Think 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. It seems improbable, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Dynamic HTML.