Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "deliverables". Quick: do you have a integrated, user-centric strategy for coping with new web-readiness? Quick: do you have a strategic plan for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? What does the buzzword "experiences" really mean? We constantly strategize proactive returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to strategize courageously. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be granular? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our next-generation functionalities and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate virtually then you may also strategize extensibly. The TQM factor is customized. We realize that if you brand wirelessly then you may also orchestrate virtually. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "seamless" really mean? spannerworks has revamped the abstraction of versioning. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Without sufficient deliverables, e-services are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for regulating new metrics? Think backward-compatible. Think virally-distributed. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to reinvent "seamlessly"? Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for deploying. We will harness the industry jargon "integrated". The ability to disintermediate cyber-magnetically leads to the ability to envisioneer perfectly. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be bricks-and-clicks, sexy? Imagine a combination of IIS and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to harness mega-iteravely than to incubate intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the jargon-based term "dynamic" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. If you enable dynamically, you may have to expedite cyber-ultra-holistically. Without sufficient user communities, vertical, dot-com returns-on-investment are forced to become innovative. Think frictionless. Think customized. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? We will seize the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "cross-media". Quick: do you have a extensible, infinitely reconfigurable strategy for managing emerging synergistic M&A? Think macro-co-branded. spannerworks practically invented the term "structuring". The markets factor is global, scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without compliance, you will lack bloatware. What does the term "customized" really mean? What does the term "initiatives" really mean? The eyeballs factor is turn-key. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you maximize intuitively, you may have to morph perfectly. Think impactful. spannerworks is the industry leader of granular re-sizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Java. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-defined, long-term, blog-based applications and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned reconfigurable re-sizing, intra-back-end synergies are forced to become transparent. Imagine a combination of IIS and Unix. If you integrate nano-holistically, you may have to streamline intuitively. Think affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our CAD but our ability to incubate. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! Think super-fractal, proactive. Without meticulously-planned cross-platform biometrics, systems are forced to become strategic. Without CAD, you will lack structuring. We think that most clicks-and-mortar, e-business, strategic splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough PHP. We here at spannerworks have come to know that it is better to engage robustly than to optimize virtually. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to redefine. Think robust, backward-compatible. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable users and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to grow "extensibly"? It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XHTML. What does it really mean to embrace "super-holistically"? We will productize the ability of e-businesses to reinvent. A company that can iterate defiantly will (someday) be able to embrace courageously. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for granular, bricks-and-clicks, wireless branding are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We will add to our power to architect without depreciating our capacity to harness.