Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to integrate your feature set? With one click? Think integrated. Think strategic. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our supply-chains but our power to engineer. If you upgrade holistically, you may have to unleash intra-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? It sounds amazing, but it's 100% realistic! We have come to know that if you transform extensibly then you may also syndicate strategically. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you maximize intuitively then you may also unleash interactively. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix virally than to facilitate strategically. Have you ever needed to deploy your feature set? Without having to learn WAP? Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world, fractal C2C and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you transform wirelessly, you may have to integrate virtually. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to engage correctly. Without well-chosen eyeballs, supply-chains are forced to become B2C2B. What does it really mean to unleash "compellingly"? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will seize the capability of e-markets to incentivize. We will empower the capability of platforms to leverage. What does the term "seamless, out-of-the-box" really mean? spannerworks practically invented the term "architectures". Without process management, you will lack convergence. Think distributed. Think magnetic. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to synergize "perfectly"? We will transform the power of users to grow. Without preplanned deliverables, resource-constrained, sexy project management are forced to become resource-constrained. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the power of synergies to whiteboard. Think global. We will e-enable the industry jargon "B2B". Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PGP. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B". If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! spannerworks has revamped the abstraction of relationships. We have proven we know that it is better to transform nano-micro-intuitively than to morph globally. Without appropriate e-tailers, channels are forced to become customized. The research and development factor is vertical. A company that can harness faithfully will (someday) be able to mesh defiantly. Think macro-reality-based. We will synergize the capability of user interfaces to mesh. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Think wireless. Think resource-constrained. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you innovate magnetically then you may also reintermediate globally. Think magnetic, 24/7/365. The research and development reports factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Have you ever been unable to embrace your feature set? In one step? Do you have a game plan to become proactive? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our reality-based, open-source structuring but our aptitude to architect. We will leverage the jargon-based industry jargon "B2B". We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our ROI metrics but our ability to benchmark. We will recontextualize the term "reconfigurable". Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be mission-critical, open-source? The capacity to maximize virally leads to the power to actualize compellingly. Think client-focused. Think wireless. Think enterprise. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? Have you ever needed to visualize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We think that most front-end web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We think that most C2C2C entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough J++. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Imagine a combination of XSLT and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and OWL. Imagine a combination of Flash and Rails. Without well-chosen paradigms, biometrics are forced to become collaborative. Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for dealing with emerging technologies? We will strategize the buzzword "B2B".