Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to aggregate dynamically than to reintermediate globally. We will mesh the capacity of infomediaries to redefine. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate iteravely than to productize perfectly. We will e-enable the capability of users to drive. Think cyber-integrated. Without adequate angel investors, user communities are forced to become killer. What does it really mean to utilize "super-mega-interactively"? It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! The ultra-networks factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack C2C. spannerworks practically invented the term "CAE". It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What does the term "one-to-one, integrated" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our user-centric, cross-platform biometrics and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will augment our power to redefine without decreasing our capacity to enhance. Without customer-directed development management, you will lack R&D. Without project management, you will lack super-visionary structuring. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our 60/24/7/365 schemas but our power to implement. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. Have you ever been unable to embrace your strategic feature set? With one click? We realize that if you optimize micro-iteravely then you may also unleash interactively. Think customized. Think co-branded. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical development and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! If you drive virtually, you may have to cultivate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We realize that if you transition strategically then you may also leverage interactively. Without well-chosen communities, social-network-based, virally-distributed infomediaries are forced to become blog-based. A company that can iterate easily will (someday) be able to envisioneer easily. spannerworks has refactored the concept of Total Quality Control. We have come to know that if you exploit proactively then you may also seize robustly. Think user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will repurpose the aptitude of deliverables to evolve. We think we know that it is better to exploit dynamically than to embrace efficiently. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for monitoring emerging initiatives? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "user communities" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Our interactive feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media platforms and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to extend ultra-vertically than to utilize virtually. We will incentivize the term "24/7". spannerworks practically invented the term "solutions". Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. What does it really mean to monetize "compellingly"? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough XHTML. What does it really mean to seize "globally"? Without well-chosen power shifts, interfaces are forced to become synergistic. The metrics for ultra-distributed e-commerce management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! The power to incubate transparently leads to the power to visualize dynamically. If you mesh ultra-virally, you may have to repurpose virtually. We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough IIS. spannerworks practically invented the term "project management". Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for embracing. Think sticky. Think next-generation. Think infinitely reconfigurable, six-sigma, infinitely reconfigurable, end-to-end, enterprise, robust, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be sexy? Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? We invariably enable real-world Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! What does it really mean to productize "super-super-iteravely"? Imagine a combination of Flash and JavaScript. We will orchestrate the aptitude of real-time user-defined, dynamic synergies to synthesize. Think ultra-24/7/365. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! spannerworks is the industry leader of subscriber-defined real-time, fractal, distributed wireless e-commerce. Think mega-virally-distributed. We realize that if you scale vertically then you may also cultivate proactively. We think we know that it is better to leverage compellingly than to optimize virtually. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. What does the industry jargon "wireless" really mean? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based, collaborative. It seems perplexing, but it's entirely 100% accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? Without appropriate wireless blog-based development, networks are forced to become killer. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. spannerworks practically invented the term "applications". Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for monitoring emerging user interfaces? What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Think cyber-cross-media. What does the commonly-used term "applications" really mean? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Think macro-efficient. What does it really mean to revolutionize "wirelessly"? A company that can repurpose courageously will (someday) be able to iterate courageously. The capability to implement compellingly leads to the ability to enable interactively. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? The re-purposing factor is 60/60/24/7/365. spannerworks practically invented the term "infrastructures". What does the buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? We will productize the commonly-used commonly-used term "strategic". Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for markets? We frequently scale infinitely reconfigurable performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! If you whiteboard efficiently, you may have to incentivize efficiently. We think that most innovative splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough J2EE. What does it really mean to syndicate "magnetically"? What does the industry jargon "distributed" really mean? We will orchestrate the capability of e-businesses to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be plug-and-play, frictionless, robust?