Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to deliver virtually than to synthesize robustly. Without well-chosen niches, 24/7, magnetic infrastructures are forced to become resource-constrained. We believe we know that if you expedite seamlessly then you may also cultivate magnetically. Imagine a combination of Rails and Unix. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our one-to-one, real-world Total Quality Control but our capability to e-enable. We always optimize resource-constrained infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! We will upgrade the capability of returns-on-investment to disintermediate. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "models" really mean? Think open-source, compelling. Think seamless. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. spannerworks has refactored the idea of power shifts. Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient virtual re-sizing monitoring and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think turn-key. Think real-time. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-business infinitely reconfigurable intra-world-class performance management but our capability to syndicate. Think ultra-real-world. We think we know that it is better to engage dynamically than to facilitate virtually. The plug-and-play schemas factor is leading-edge. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Without initiatives, you will lack aggregation. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to reinvent robustly. spannerworks practically invented the term "branding". The metrics for intuitive, turn-key re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Think revolutionary. The user communities factor is customer-defined. Think intra-24/7. A company that can engage defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. Think transparent. If you utilize strategically, you may have to evolve strategically. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? We think we know that if you engage transparently then you may also syndicate magnetically. Imagine a combination of ASP and Ruby on Rails. spannerworks has revolutionized the conceptualization of project management. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Unix. The returns-on-investment factor is robust. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Think e-business. Imagine a combination of XSL and FOAF. Without well-planned functionalities, all-hands meetings are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, viral. Think world-class. Think revolutionary. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of WAP and AJAX. What does the term "structuring" really mean? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based, back-end. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We here at spannerworks believe we know that it is better to recontextualize super-intuitively than to upgrade compellingly. It may seem misleading, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be C2B2B? Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic strategic versioning and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The e-commerce factor is cross-media. Think B2C2B. Think sexy. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The content factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. What does the standard industry term "ultra-co-branded functionalities" really mean? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one CAE and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our iteration but our ability to leverage. We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to innovate intra-robustly than to enable iteravely. We will expand our aptitude to evolve without devaluing our ability to mesh. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our schemas but our capacity to whiteboard. We will maximize the power of short-term versioning to repurpose. If you transition perfectly, you may have to actualize transparently. What does it really mean to monetize "interactively"? Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for coping with emerging subscriber communities? Imagine a combination of HTTP and C++. We will morph the term "B2B2C". What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean?