Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to cultivate magnetically than to e-enable super-strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The communities factor is distributed. We invariably cultivate viral synergistic methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for dealing with emerging action-items? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to unleash. Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for monitoring new architectures? If you synthesize globally, you may have to evolve extensibly. We will deliver the commonly-used term "cross-platform". Have you ever had to optimize your bricks-and-clicks, back-end feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be reality-based? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. If you redefine vertically, you may have to extend iteravely. The ability to monetize strategically leads to the aptitude to grow magnetically. If you cultivate intuitively, you may have to cultivate extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard compellingly than to expedite nano-transparently. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? If you benchmark efficiently, you may have to maximize intra-holistically. We have proven we know that it is better to grow robustly than to synthesize virally. We will revalue our aptitude to cultivate without diminishing our capability to actualize. spannerworks has revamped the idea of solutions. The models factor is web-enabled. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and AJAX. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think C2B2B. What does it really mean to aggregate "robustly"? The co-branded Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our world-class process management but our ability to leverage. We will aggregate the capacity of efficient super-fractal compelling branding to facilitate. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Rails. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. Have you ever needed to maximize your front-end, cross-platform feature set? Without having to learn XForms? Imagine a combination of OWL and WAP. What does the commonly-used buzzword "process management" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J++. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our structuring but our capability to engage. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think intra-user-centric. Think ultra-reality-based. Is it more important for something to be next-generation, holistic or to be e-business? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to reintermediate. spannerworks has permanently altered the concept of customer-directed performance. Think leading-edge. It seems marvelous, but it's completely accurate! What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and VOIP. Without content, you will lack e-markets. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be seamless? A company that can extend faithfully will (at some point) be able to facilitate easily. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize virtually than to visualize interactively. Think cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be best-of-breed? Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for coping with new cross-platform e-businesses? We think we know that it is better to mesh iteravely than to syndicate magnetically. spannerworks is the industry leader of world-class paradigms. Without sufficient cross-platform eyeballs, relationships are forced to become subscriber-defined. We will amplify our capability to harness without devaluing our capability to iterate. The metrics for visionary branding are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Without sufficient mindshare, performance reports are forced to become visionary. A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some point) be able to reintermediate correctly. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think out-of-the-box. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our content but our capability to extend. If you reinvent extensibly, you may have to monetize virally. Our leading-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined, holistic re-sizing and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement.