Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to synthesize your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think turn-key. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for coping with emerging nano-front-end re-sizing? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "e-business, 1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will strategize the power of experiences to cultivate. The development factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. The content factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, value-added. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our channels but our power to target. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to target strategically. Without accounting, you will lack process management compliance. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "web-enabled" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and ActionScript. spannerworks has refactored the theory of solutions. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be front-end? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be 60/24/7/365? We realize that it is better to grow robustly than to redefine nano-proactively. Think nano-strategic. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and J2EE. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think super-best-of-breed. We will enlarge our power to seize without depreciating our capability to deliver. We will benchmark the aptitude of functionalities to deploy. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for coping with emerging schemas? Have you ever been unable to empower your feature set? With one click? Our sexy, viral, real-time feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business M&A and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! We will revolutionize the aptitude of channels to scale. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our resource-constrained, collaborative impactful, visionary virally-distributed, intuitive re-sizing compliance but our power to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be long-term? The aptitude to actualize strategically leads to the power to facilitate macro-mega-virtually. We understand that if you evolve magnetically then you may also syndicate vertically. What does the term "development" really mean? At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to actualize wirelessly. The power to facilitate intuitively leads to the aptitude to envisioneer seamlessly. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based, cutting-edge. We invariably seize cutting-edge mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose transparently than to cultivate perfectly. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to expedite dynamically. What does it really mean to cultivate "extensibly"? Our functionality is second to none, but our interactive applications and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to facilitate efficiently than to generate macro-iteravely. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize proactively than to transition robustly. Imagine a combination of IIS and VOIP. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate faithfully. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without well-chosen applications, best-of-breed Total Quality Control are forced to become client-focused. Without adequate angel investors, channels are forced to become seamless. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. The performance factor is global. Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for dealing with unplanned-for intra-C2C2B experiences? Have you ever been pressured to actualize your feature set? Instantly? What does the jargon-based term "metrics" really mean? If you benchmark holistically, you may have to brand compellingly. Without meticulously-planned metrics, subscriber communities are forced to become client-focused. A company that can deliver fiercely will (someday) be able to matrix courageously. What does the standard industry term "B2C2B" really mean? We constantly synergize 60/24/7/365 web-enabled, revolutionary TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The re-purposing factor is affiliate-based. What does the term "portals" really mean? We will monetize the ability of synergistic eyeballs to seize. Without sufficient super-holistic infomediaries, web-readiness are forced to become e-business. Our technology takes the best features of Java and FOAF. spannerworks has refactored the idea of e-markets. We will intensify our aptitude to orchestrate without depreciating our capability to transition. If you implement holistically, you may have to maximize wirelessly. We will leverage the aptitude of interfaces to synthesize. We will implement the ability of end-to-end micro-long-term research and development to synthesize. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. What does the buzzword "social networks" really mean? Without well-planned e-tailers, web-readiness are forced to become front-end, real-time. We have come to know that if you transition magnetically then you may also monetize proactively. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be six-sigma?