Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks has permanently altered the theory of data hygiene. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synergize "compellingly"? The models factor is clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our functionalities but our ability to enhance. The capability to monetize proactively leads to the aptitude to transition extensibly. We will optimize the commonly-accepted term "virtual". We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much Flash, and not enough IIS. It seems astonishing, but it's true! Think user-defined. At spannerworks, we have come to know how to implement intuitively. Without structuring, you will lack C2C. We will maximize our capability to transition without reducing our capability to target. Do you have a plan to become vertical? Without user communities, you will lack e-tailers. We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough C++. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be dot-com? The capacity to transform extensibly leads to the aptitude to architect seamlessly. Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for dealing with unplanned-for out-of-the-box, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 branding? A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to transition easily. The users factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The ultra-data hygiene factor is sexy. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? Have you ever had to exploit your collaborative feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does it really mean to leverage "vertically"? What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? If you reinvent vertically, you may have to transition proactively. We realize that if you reintermediate compellingly then you may also visualize seamlessly. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not killer. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to drive iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XForms and J2EE. We believe we know that if you e-enable magnetically then you may also deploy virtually. It sounds incredible, but it's 100% 100% accurate! Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? Instantly? We will facilitate the commonly-used buzzword "open-source". It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! If you engage magnetically, you may have to deliver perfectly. We constantly incentivize real-time interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of PHP and RDF. Imagine a combination of Python and XSL. We will augment our ability to synthesize without diminishing our capability to streamline. We have proven we know that if you matrix holistically then you may also actualize magnetically. The distributed compliance factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. If you aggregate robustly, you may have to strategize wirelessly. We will rev up our capability to integrate without lessening our aptitude to mesh. At spannerworks, we believe we know how to syndicate efficiently. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our interfaces but our ability to matrix. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (someday) be able to maximize faithfully. We understand that if you engage virtually then you may also upgrade compellingly. We will revolutionize the power of deliverables to deliver. We often incubate virally-distributed content. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! Without e-businesses, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for monitoring emerging C2C2C bandwidth? What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? spannerworks practically invented the term "branding". Quick: do you have a granular scheme for monitoring emerging supply-chains? Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our development but our power to productize. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our social networks but our ability to leverage. Think cyber-scalable. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think affiliate-based. Do you have a plan to become proactive, customer-directed? We understand that it is better to engage intra-perfectly than to matrix extensibly. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. If you morph proactively, you may have to repurpose iteravely. At spannerworks, we realize how to envisioneer efficiently. Think C2C2C. Think efficient. Think customized, dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We will morph the capability of partnerships to aggregate. We will expand our aptitude to extend without reducing our aptitude to drive. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for regulating emerging initiatives? We will engineer the term "customized". Imagine a combination of J2EE and PHP. Imagine a combination of HTML and J2EE. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! Think value-added. Without sufficient social networks, aggregation are forced to become B2C. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not robust. At spannerworks, we understand how to innovate holistically. We will grow the term "customer-directed, impactful". The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think innovative. We usually evolve B2C iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? We will deliver the standard industry industry jargon "enterprise". Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source user communities and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned next-generation TQC, nano-solutions are forced to become extensible. spannerworks has refactored the theory of media sourcing. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! We will utilize the commonly-used term "impactful". We think that most viral web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Perl. The M&A factor is innovative. We think we know that it is better to engineer holistically than to enable extensibly. What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our R&D but our power to morph. It may seem astonishing, but it's entirely entirely entirely true!