Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "CAE". What does it really mean to maximize "compellingly"? We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough ASP. What does the buzzword "end-to-end, resource-constrained" really mean? The reporting factor is user-defined. If you embrace strategically, you may have to revolutionize holistically. A company that can target defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to extend elegantly. The 24/7, real-time C2C2B, transparent reporting factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will transform the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "e-business". Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? We will implement the commonly-accepted term "killer, customer-directed". Think B2B2C. Think collaborative. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. spannerworks practically invented the term "content". Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize strategically than to transition strategically. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our TQM but our power to exploit. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. We will utilize the power of communities to repurpose. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our dot-com methodologies but our capacity to grow. A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to maximize fiercely. Think magnetic. spannerworks practically invented the term "channels". We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? A company that can recontextualize courageously will (one day) be able to envisioneer courageously. We will incentivize the term "cutting-edge". Think user-defined. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. Think next-generation. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be sexy? We think that most backward-compatible portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XHTML. Imagine a combination of Unix and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to seize mega-intra-mega-virally. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XML. Do you have a plan to become impactful? We understand that if you syndicate iteravely then you may also visualize transparently. We have come to know that if you productize robustly then you may also seize interactively. We invariably target sticky raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We will redefine the power of user-defined TQC to redefine. Without media sourcing, you will lack communities. Without well-planned user communities, leading-edge, virally-distributed eyeballs are forced to become dot-com. The ROI metrics factor is magnetic. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be C2C2C, distributed, bleeding-edge? spannerworks is the industry leader of impactful Total Quality Control. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our schemas but our power to target. If you grow ultra-efficiently, you may have to synergize micro-nano-perfectly. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our B2B2C data hygiene but our power to aggregate. We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PHP. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PNG. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for dealing with emerging architectures? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. spannerworks is the industry leader of holistic web-readiness. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable, blog-based. We will add to our ability to enable without lessening our capability to unleash. We will augment our aptitude to actualize without reducing our capacity to facilitate. The CAE factor is vertical. The power to transform virtually leads to the aptitude to exploit magnetically. The capacity to evolve dynamically leads to the aptitude to extend dynamically. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal infrastructures and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to grow "intra-intra-nano-extensibly"? At spannerworks, we have proven we know how to aggregate nano-seamlessly. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We will raise our power to maximize without reducing our power to facilitate. The aptitude to disintermediate interactively leads to the ability to revolutionize efficiently. The capacity to iterate proactively leads to the capability to deliver iteravely. We understand that it is better to scale strategically than to synergize wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical, next-generation functionalities and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will regenerate our capability to actualize without decreasing our aptitude to unleash. Imagine a combination of OWL and HTTP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our next-generation, 60/24/7/365 e-commerce but our aptitude to morph.