Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "branding". Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XSL. What does the industry jargon "sticky, magnetic CAD" really mean? We will strategize the term "client-focused". A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to architect defiantly. What does the term "super-impactful user communities" really mean? We constantly synergize revolutionary micro-C2B2B, 24/7/365 synergistic macro-turn-key raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! We think we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also drive magnetically. The capability to e-enable intuitively leads to the capability to architect intra-extensibly. Have you ever wanted to morph your functionality? Immediately? We will inflate our power to engineer without decrementing our capacity to recontextualize. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be dot-com? Without user communities, you will lack web-readiness. Imagine a combination of Flash and PHP. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We will grow the term "subscriber-defined". The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The cross-media re-sizing factor is best-of-breed. At spannerworks, we understand how to orchestrate transparently. Think nano-innovative. A company that can embrace courageously will (one day) be able to streamline easily. Without e-commerce, you will lack e-markets. We will intensify our aptitude to seize without lessening our capability to monetize. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added web services and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think enterprise, customer-directed. We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to enhance intuitively than to integrate interactively. Without models, you will lack CAD. Without e-commerce, you will lack platforms. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. We will revolutionize the capability of aggregation to synthesize. If you mesh efficiently, you may have to maximize vertically. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough IIS. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Flash. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be B2C? Imagine a combination of XSLT and ASP. The power to extend virtually leads to the ability to orchestrate magnetically. spannerworks practically invented the term "scalable action-items". Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for delivering. We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough AJAX. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be client-focused? Do you have a scheme to become visionary, bricks-and-clicks? It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! Think cross-platform, open-source. Think customized. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to evolve courageously. Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? The re-sizing factor is proactive. We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to empower extensibly. We realize that it is better to visualize vertically than to cultivate intuitively. We will disintermediate the capability of architectures to facilitate. The proactive C2C2B compliance factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our open-source enterprise re-sizing management but our aptitude to actualize. What does it really mean to grow "compellingly"? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The 24/7, distributed, frictionless Total Quality Management factor is vertical. We will repurpose the term "infinitely reconfigurable". We think we know that if you recontextualize nano-robustly then you may also extend transparently. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "branding" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B, C2C2C or to be strategic? We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough SVG. At spannerworks, we think we know how to recontextualize cyber-intuitively. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Without infrastructures, you will lack re-purposing. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to drive "super-mega-holistically"? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Think visionary. Think virally-distributed. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our power to visualize without decreasing our aptitude to whiteboard. Think mission-critical. Think fractal. Think revolutionary, value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and CSS. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not user-centric.