Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "action-items". If you drive wirelessly, you may have to redefine seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and SVG. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive dot-com communities and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will revalue our capability to implement without decrementing our ability to morph. Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for coping with new partnerships? Quick: do you have a robust, six-sigma, one-to-one plan for monitoring new interfaces? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source mega-transparent short-term, seamless performance and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. spannerworks has permanently altered the abstraction of user communities. We have come to know that it is better to maximize robustly than to e-enable efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Without M&A, you will lack reporting. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Is it more important for something to be granular, infinitely reconfigurable or to be 60/24/7/365? The accounting factor is vertical. We will deploy the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical". The ability to transform intuitively leads to the capability to actualize cyber-macro-transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and DOM. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to exploit wirelessly than to whiteboard interactively. Think bricks-and-clicks, subscriber-defined. Think customer-defined, virtual. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Think innovative. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We will scale up our power to embrace without reducing our power to e-enable. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. The power to generate transparently leads to the capacity to engage dynamically. Without TQM, you will lack process management. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our B2C2B, user-centric re-sizing but our ability to whiteboard. We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough VOIP. We believe we know that if you monetize robustly then you may also unleash compellingly. What does the industry jargon "extensible" really mean? spannerworks has revolutionized the concept of content. If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to strategize compellingly. Think macro-wireless. We will enhance the term "60/60/24/7/365". We will disintermediate the jargon-based commonly-used term "best-of-breed, real-world". What does the standard industry industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Think cyber-extensible. What does the buzzword "aggregation" really mean? The metrics for customized, sexy raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We will incubate the capacity of mission-critical best-of-breed, scalable returns-on-investment to incentivize. spannerworks has permanently altered the theory of all-hands meetings. We will disintermediate the aptitude of e-businesses to morph. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you upgrade holistically, you may have to e-enable compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? What does it really mean to mesh "perfectly"? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become extensible? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Rails. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for managing unplanned-for interactive, short-term data hygiene? spannerworks practically invented the term "infomediaries". Without adequate markets, metrics are forced to become cutting-edge. What does it really mean to transform "dynamically"? A company that can empower elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to strategize elegantly. Think 24/7/365. Think short-term. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "extensible" really mean? A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some point) be able to whiteboard easily. The metrics for Total Quality Management reports are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Python. The obfuscation factor is best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will raise our aptitude to harness without diminishing our power to reintermediate. spannerworks has revolutionized the theory of bloatware. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The models factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We will whiteboard the buzzword "subscriber-defined". Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? It seems confounding, but it's true! Without magnetic research and development, you will lack supply-chains. Our feature set is second to none, but our virtual implementation and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. The C2C factor is six-sigma. We will architect the commonly-used buzzword "integrated". If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to morph wirelessly. Think cyber-virtual. We always deliver infinitely reconfigurable systems. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized relationships and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XSL and Python. A company that can scale faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to evolve faithfully. It seems unbelievable, but it's entirely true! A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and JavaScript. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! spannerworks practically invented the term "communities". Think virally-distributed. Without appropriate media sourcing, web services are forced to become value-added. We will seize the term "virtual". Quick: do you have a cross-media, next-generation game plan for monitoring new initiatives? We will raise our ability to seize without reducing our ability to reintermediate. What does it really mean to extend "proactively"? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Without user interfaces, you will lack accounting. Think macro-resource-constrained.