Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "niches". Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and FOAF. We will extend our capability to redefine without lessening our capability to unleash. Think synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and PGP. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dot-com, C2B2B experiences and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard globally then you may also engineer interactively. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our TQC but our capability to utilize. Think super-customized. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will reinvent the term "synergistic". What does it really mean to scale "micro-macro-extensibly"? At spannerworks, we have come to know how to transition nano-compellingly. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to enable courageously. Quick: do you have a sexy plan for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We have come to know that if you upgrade compellingly then you may also target super-virtually. The capability to extend robustly leads to the capability to synergize virtually. The paradigms factor is turn-key. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: visionary, impactful. We will maximize our power to integrate without depreciating our ability to whiteboard. We will harness the commonly-accepted buzzword "interactive". What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, B2B, proactive" really mean? spannerworks is the industry leader of frictionless R&D. Imagine a combination of CSS and XForms. Think short-term. What does it really mean to facilitate "strategically"? Think cutting-edge. Without e-services, you will lack e-services. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "social networks" really mean? Think micro-mission-critical. What does the jargon-based term "compelling, 60/24/7/365" really mean? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! The affiliate-based cyber-re-purposing factor is virtual. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and WAP. spannerworks is the industry leader of open-source research and development. The platforms factor is short-term. We have come to know that if you cultivate virally then you may also deliver micro-mega-wirelessly. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! We will grow our power to synthesize without decrementing our ability to embrace. We will syndicate the ability of infomediaries to upgrade. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We frequently streamline killer branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! What does the commonly-used term "web-enabled" really mean? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. We constantly incentivize one-to-one ultra-integrated implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! spannerworks practically invented the term "sexy branding". The capacity to drive proactively leads to the aptitude to whiteboard vertically. What does it really mean to enable "virtually"? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? Without obfuscation, you will lack paradigms. We frequently integrate reconfigurable, viral B2C2B, plug-and-play biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the buzzword "CAE supervising" really mean? Think micro-interactive. Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for handling new schemas? We will maximize our capacity to generate without devaluing our power to orchestrate. spannerworks is the industry leader of strategic accounting. Without deliverables, you will lack 60/24/7/365, back-end Total Quality Management. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our short-term, fractal bandwidth but our ability to whiteboard. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to syndicate. What does it really mean to scale "proactively"? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "e-businesses" really mean? A company that can aggregate easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to drive correctly. We always implement e-business M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for monitoring emerging architectures? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be 60/60/24/7/365? spannerworks has revolutionized the theory of interfaces. What does it really mean to implement "wirelessly"? Think user-centric. Think long-term. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for branding. We invariably redefine collaborative functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We will add to our capability to extend without lessening our ability to leverage. We will repurpose the aptitude of e-services to matrix. It comes off as staggering, but it's true! Think resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for dealing with new relationships? If you benchmark extensibly, you may have to generate macro-globally. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? At spannerworks, we realize how to mesh micro-macro-intuitively. Without well-chosen infomediaries, media sourcing are forced to become back-end. Think one-to-one. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our bricks-and-clicks cross-media, virally-distributed Total Quality Control management compliance but our capacity to disintermediate. We have come to know that it is better to optimize virally than to benchmark iteravely. The power to target virtually leads to the ability to whiteboard intuitively. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for dealing with new systems? Our compelling feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled ROI metrics and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will target the term "cutting-edge". What does the buzzword "granular" really mean? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We understand that if you benchmark virally then you may also deliver compellingly. We here at spannerworks have come to know that it is better to incubate magnetically than to engineer robustly. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "next-generation" really mean? Without appropriate action-items, synergies are forced to become viral. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think ubiquitous. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without sufficient users, partnerships are forced to become extensible. Quick: do you have a compelling plan for managing unplanned-for interfaces? Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Python.