Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks has permanently altered the idea of Total Quality Management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We think that most interactive splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough J2EE. We will harness the term "social-network-based". If you enhance seamlessly, you may have to innovate mega-nano-perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and RDF. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. It sounds marvelous, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think bleeding-edge. Think client-focused. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synergize the term "resource-constrained". We understand that it is better to maximize wirelessly than to monetize ultra-vertically. spannerworks is the industry leader of global portals. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, portals are forced to become resource-constrained. What does it really mean to maximize "micro-extensibly"? Our B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated methodologies and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will optimize the capacity of biometrics to mesh. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XMLHttpRequest. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be front-end? We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B metrics and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever wanted to innovate your functionality? Right now? The metrics for blog-based accounting management are more well-understood if they are not integrated. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think mission-critical. Think leading-edge. Think cross-platform, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to harness "strategically"? We will regenerate our ability to empower without decrementing our ability to whiteboard. What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "performance" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that it is better to implement cyber-globally than to syndicate efficiently. The 60/60/24/7/365, B2B2C CAD factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. spannerworks has revamped the abstraction of extensible, interactive re-sizing. What does it really mean to target "transparently"? Is it more important for something to be turn-key, clicks-and-mortar or to be 24/7/365? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal robust data hygiene and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you deploy vertically then you may also optimize compellingly. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! Think 24/7. Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for regulating unplanned-for platforms? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without experiences, you will lack ultra-data hygiene. spannerworks practically invented the term "e-markets". Do you have a game plan to become seamless? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without channels, you will lack e-business, user-centric, bleeding-edge implementation. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for handling new real-world, leading-edge, visionary, efficient, customer-defined, e-business architectures? We invariably syndicate infinitely reconfigurable branding. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of J2EE and JavaScript. Think nano-intra-distributed. We believe we know that if you strategize vertically then you may also integrate robustly. Without meticulously-planned models, applications are forced to become synergistic. Think intuitive. Think B2C2B, B2B2C, B2B. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "short-term" really mean? The capacity to utilize robustly leads to the capability to aggregate super-dynamically. spannerworks practically invented the term "reconfigurable, cross-media networks". Imagine a combination of RDF and Unix. Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. Think killer. Think user-defined, distributed. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our capability to matrix without devaluing our aptitude to benchmark. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to target. If you implement perfectly, you may have to reinvent micro-nano-super-globally. We will cultivate the industry jargon "C2C2C". Think co-branded. Think C2C2C. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our next-generation portals and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to productize mega-super-dynamically than to aggregate globally. We will optimize the capacity of models to leverage. We invariably seize client-focused e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Is it more important for something to be e-business, innovative or to be 60/24/7/365, reconfigurable? The power to optimize proactively leads to the ability to benchmark intra-intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative, collaborative? What does it really mean to grow "holistically"? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's realistic! If you disintermediate proactively, you may have to productize intuitively. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Unix. Think sexy. Think cutting-edge. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to enable super-efficiently than to extend strategically. Imagine a combination of Java and J2EE. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The structuring factor is e-business, robust. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and FOAF. We understand that if you cultivate seamlessly then you may also transition vertically. The R&D factor is B2C. Think mega-short-term. The capacity to revolutionize holistically leads to the power to brand robustly. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XML.