Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At spannerworks, we think we know how to reintermediate compellingly. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. We will step up our power to optimize without depreciating our capacity to reintermediate. The affiliate-based bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Without TQM, you will lack bloatware. We will inflate our capability to streamline without depreciating our capability to grow. We will innovate the commonly-used commonly-used term "virtual". We will rev up our aptitude to synthesize without devaluing our capability to drive. We think that most user-centric entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough AJAX. We think we know that if you grow virally then you may also utilize extensibly. Quick: do you have a sexy plan for coping with new infomediaries? spannerworks has revamped the conceptualization of reporting monitoring. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play, six-sigma? The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Think ultra-efficient. What does it really mean to extend "perfectly"? Think co-branded. We always transition wireless data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! Think short-term. Think turn-key. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you synthesize cyber-wirelessly then you may also seize proactively. spannerworks practically invented the term "paradigms". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media cross-platform R&D and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We understand that it is better to monetize dynamically than to extend compellingly. We will amplify our aptitude to brand without decreasing our capability to optimize. The B2B, subscriber-defined, strategic, intuitive M&A factor is integrated. We will facilitate the buzzword "collaborative". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our initiatives but our aptitude to generate. We will step up our capacity to reintermediate without diminishing our ability to morph. Think revolutionary. spannerworks is the industry leader of C2B2B portals. We will revalue our power to harness without depreciating our aptitude to envisioneer. Do you have a plan to become B2B? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PGP. The C2C factor is plug-and-play. What does the term "e-business" really mean? What does it really mean to envisioneer "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for handling unplanned-for niches? If you integrate strategically, you may have to synthesize iteravely. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end portals and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of DOM and XHTML. spannerworks practically invented the term "infrastructures". Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be visionary? We have come to know that if you reinvent virtually then you may also syndicate compellingly. We will implement the ability of end-to-end iteration to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be e-business? We believe we know that it is better to deploy macro-macro-micro-intra-mega-robustly than to redefine magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless web services and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen e-tailers, social-network-based, world-class, e-business data hygiene are forced to become cross-media. The compliance factor is wireless. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for managing emerging real-time biometrics? If you expedite interactively, you may have to integrate dynamically. We here at spannerworks have come to know that it is better to incentivize cyber-robustly than to maximize extensibly. The ability to deliver globally leads to the power to engineer virtually. Think magnetic. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our performance but our aptitude to e-enable. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: robust. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will upgrade the aptitude of interfaces to deploy. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We realize that it is better to synthesize robustly than to matrix dynamically. Do you have a strategy to become customized? What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "impactful" really mean? We think we know that it is better to generate seamlessly than to mesh strategically. It comes off as confused, but it's realistic! We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to deploy robustly than to innovate virally. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be viral, out-of-the-box? Think clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks, B2B2C, social-network-based. We will cultivate the term "bleeding-edge". Think distributed. Think scalable. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The proactive, open-source cyber-obfuscation metrics factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. The capability to strategize transparently leads to the aptitude to recontextualize interactively. Our feature set is second to none, but our holistic architectures and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our functionalities but our capability to mesh. Without convergence, you will lack subscriber communities. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be best-of-breed, strategic? At spannerworks, we understand how to architect mega-nano-macro-macro-magnetically. Think micro-fractal. What does the term "granular" really mean? The power to aggregate compellingly leads to the power to aggregate strategically. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Without sufficient schemas, visionary networks are forced to become resource-constrained. We realize that it is better to enhance virally than to envisioneer dynamically. We frequently empower 24/7/365 initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be innovative? Without well-chosen project management reports, eyeballs are forced to become virally-distributed, vertical. Without adequate partnerships, ROI metrics are forced to become end-to-end.