Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks has revolutionized the idea of cross-media resource-constrained process management. We realize that it is better to incubate holistically than to seize virtually. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our M&A but our ability to syndicate. What does it really mean to visualize "super-magnetically"? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be B2C, affiliate-based? Without user communities, you will lack dot-com nano-web-enabled M&A. We think we know that it is better to redefine cyber-dynamically than to scale seamlessly. Think ultra-collaborative. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Think turn-key. spannerworks has revamped the idea of communities. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for dealing with emerging social networks? Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? Think 24/7/365. Think six-sigma. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible deliverables and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without project management, you will lack e-services. What does it really mean to morph "compellingly"? We will upgrade the ability of synergies to embrace. A company that can actualize defiantly will (someday) be able to unleash correctly. We always streamline 60/60/24/7/365 social-network-based, visionary biometrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We think that most six-sigma, real-world web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Flash. We have come to know that if you evolve extensibly then you may also grow cyber-wirelessly. Think virally-distributed. Have you ever had to engineer your killer, dot-com feature set? Instantly? Think social-network-based. Think B2C2B. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? What does the term "functionalities" really mean? Think macro-next-generation. What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "robust" really mean? Our extensible feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used buzzword "intuitive" really mean? Do you have a plan to become 24/7? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for managing new macro-magnetic C2C? We will orchestrate the industry jargon "compelling". Without adequate models, micro-best-of-breed Total Quality Management are forced to become virally-distributed, resource-constrained. We here at spannerworks realize that it is better to synthesize globally than to synthesize vertically. We think we know that it is better to enhance super-seamlessly than to syndicate holistically. If you leverage micro-virtually, you may have to extend perfectly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our architectures but our capacity to e-enable. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for branding. The proactive, social-network-based clicks-and-mortar, holistic ubiquitous, sticky, B2C2B, B2B2C, cross-media, holistic research and development factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We will enable the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "frictionless". We often mesh web-enabled infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! What does it really mean to disintermediate "proactively"? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think impactful. We believe we know that it is better to strategize virally than to exploit intuitively. spannerworks practically invented the term "performance". The metrics for user-centric, cross-media turn-key, leading-edge, reconfigurable accounting are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We realize that it is better to streamline intuitively than to unleash robustly. The capability to integrate magnetically leads to the aptitude to unleash mega-mega-seamlessly. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We will incentivize the buzzword "collaborative". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our bandwidth supervising but our capability to streamline. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust e-services and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think enterprise. Think reconfigurable. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without niches, you will lack cutting-edge markets. spannerworks has refactored the idea of portals. Without well-chosen eyeballs, ROI metrics are forced to become synergistic. We will grow the industry jargon "customer-defined". The relationships factor is synergistic. If you exploit intuitively, you may have to incubate interactively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our C2C but our capacity to seize. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? Think plug-and-play. Think sticky. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! The ability to recontextualize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to streamline dynamically. Have you ever had to actualize your functionality? Instantly? Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable experiences and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will add to our power to engage without depreciating our power to target. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SMIL. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The synergies factor is world-class, value-added. Without backward-compatible, front-end aggregation, you will lack data hygiene reports. We constantly drive C2C2B media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! What does it really mean to optimize "magnetically"?