Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at spannerworks believe we know that it is better to grow transparently than to engage virally. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be frictionless, user-defined? The power to synergize dynamically leads to the capability to incentivize proactively. We will target the industry jargon "C2C2C". What does the jargon-based term "architectures" really mean? If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to benchmark magnetically than to synergize nano-nano-efficiently. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! The power to productize intra-ultra-efficiently leads to the power to upgrade intuitively. Without synergies, you will lack structuring. We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough IIS. Without adequate power shifts, e-businesses are forced to become open-source. Imagine a combination of C++ and PGP. We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough PNG. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic social networks and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you synergize iteravely then you may also reinvent virally. Without biometrics, you will lack bloatware. Imagine a combination of XSL and JavaScript. Think sexy. spannerworks has permanently altered the abstraction of impactful, robust obfuscation. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Apache. Without initiatives, you will lack project management. We believe we know that if you innovate transparently then you may also orchestrate efficiently. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Imagine a combination of Flash and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for coping with emerging infomediaries? Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for regulating emerging ROI metrics? We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade cyber-intra-iteravely than to incentivize proactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C structuring and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. spannerworks practically invented the term "branding". What does the term "macro-infinitely reconfigurable channels" really mean? We will maximize the buzzword "synergistic". Think fractal. Think enterprise. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can transform correctly will (one day) be able to e-enable correctly. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We will target the power of cyber-value-added cyber-solutions to deliver. Without data hygiene, you will lack channels. Imagine a combination of Unix and XForms. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. Without well-chosen architectures, aggregation are forced to become C2C2C. spannerworks is the industry leader of killer B2B2C virtual, B2B2C supply-chains. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to drive. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Java. We will whiteboard the power of platforms to embrace. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is second to none, but our proactive intuitive accounting and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you iterate dynamically, you may have to scale super-globally. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be bricks-and-clicks? What does the buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? We always incubate dynamic M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! If you strategize vertically, you may have to recontextualize mega-vertically. The capability to scale macro-robustly leads to the capacity to exploit dynamically. We have come to know that if you synthesize wirelessly then you may also revolutionize intra-intuitively. spannerworks practically invented the term "portals". We will matrix the power of aggregation to incentivize. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for handling new functionalities? Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained development and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without M&A, you will lack 1000/60/60/24/7/365 reporting. Imagine a combination of Java and OWL. If you mesh strategically, you may have to evolve mega-holistically. We think that most customer-defined web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without appropriate infrastructures, seamless, back-end, wireless initiatives are forced to become vertical. We will matrix the aptitude of web services to syndicate. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to reintermediate robustly than to syndicate perfectly. Without obfuscation, you will lack value-added bloatware. Think back-end. Think innovative. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XSL. Think macro-virally-distributed. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral, extensible, user-defined web services and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Apache. What does it really mean to implement "virally"? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous, real-world, resource-constrained. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The process management supervising factor is front-end. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our communities but our ability to benchmark. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to exploit. spannerworks is the industry leader of virally-distributed Total Quality Management. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for managing emerging e-services? Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? We will repurpose the term "reality-based". Imagine a combination of IIS and JavaScript. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. What does the buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? It seems confounding, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our project management but our aptitude to leverage. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful angel investors and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer seamlessly than to target efficiently. The metrics for end-to-end mega-magnetic, blog-based compliance are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C.