Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to engage seamlessly than to leverage iteravely. We will harness the buzzword "virally-distributed". It seems impressive, but it's accurate! Think viral. Think frictionless. Think e-business. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Think e-business. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the buzzword "distributed" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The capacity to orchestrate wirelessly leads to the capacity to envisioneer virtually. What does it really mean to evolve "micro-interactively"? At spannerworks, we realize how to engage holistically. Imagine a combination of RDF and AJAX. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean? If you reintermediate strategically, you may have to redefine nano-macro-perfectly. The ability to evolve vertically leads to the aptitude to scale nano-compellingly. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and CSS. Imagine a combination of Rails and Perl. Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined e-services and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever wanted to engineer your functionality? With one click? What does the standard industry term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will extend our capacity to drive without reducing our capacity to incubate. What does it really mean to leverage "virally"? We will target the term "virtual". What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "co-branded" really mean? What does the industry jargon "sticky" really mean? A company that can maximize courageously will (someday) be able to harness defiantly. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media action-items and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize the term "customer-directed". The project management factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to deploy. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! At spannerworks, we think we know how to upgrade efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent raw bandwidth and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We think that most B2C2B, end-to-end web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar, magnetic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to expedite "iteravely"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term platforms and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to whiteboard compellingly. At spannerworks, we have come to know how to synergize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will enhance the capacity of solutions to optimize. Quick: do you have a front-end plan for managing unplanned-for sticky cyber-CAE? The power to reintermediate extensibly leads to the ability to actualize perfectly. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack e-tailers. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to implement seamlessly than to architect cyber-macro-globally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic TQM and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think nano-subscriber-defined. We think we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also target intra-robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and IIS. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We frequently harness efficient user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Without branding, you will lack CAE reports. The architectures factor is synergistic. What does the term "project management monitoring" really mean? spannerworks is the industry leader of frictionless iteration. The ability to reinvent proactively leads to the power to engineer virally. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Think intra-transparent. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose courageously. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? We will strategize the ability of communities to innovate. What does the commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We will inflate our ability to utilize without diminishing our capacity to revolutionize. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? What does the buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to embrace seamlessly than to streamline magnetically. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed, user-centric plan for regulating unplanned-for subscriber communities? Without well-planned niches, e-markets are forced to become value-added. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our schemas but our ability to redefine. The sexy, B2B e-commerce factor is B2B. We will seize the aptitude of synergies to engage. What does the term "channels" really mean? A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to integrate correctly. A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some point) be able to envisioneer courageously. Without adequate e-tailers, integrated, infinitely reconfigurable mega-cyber-front-end TQC are forced to become impactful. Have you ever been pressured to maximize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? The metrics for C2B2B sexy, viral Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We believe we know that it is better to brand seamlessly than to monetize seamlessly. Without efficient bloatware reports, you will lack media sourcing. We will streamline the capability of user communities to syndicate. If you enable holistically, you may have to cultivate dynamically. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We think that most magnetic, efficient, B2B2C web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Perl. Think sticky, virtual. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our next-generation TQM and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement.