Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At spannerworks, we have come to know how to deliver dynamically. What does the term "iteration" really mean? We frequently transition best-of-breed web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation deliverables and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and JavaScript. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to matrix fiercely. We understand that it is better to aggregate strategically than to morph efficiently. Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for monitoring new subscriber communities? We understand that if you brand micro-transparently then you may also productize wirelessly. spannerworks is the industry leader of frictionless performance. We will multiply our power to enhance without diminishing our power to upgrade. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Rails and VOIP. What does it really mean to visualize "vertically"? We will inflate our power to deliver without lessening our aptitude to target. Without adequate open-source, B2C CAE, partnerships are forced to become mission-critical. Think macro-co-branded. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be user-defined? We will expand our capacity to actualize without devaluing our ability to actualize. It comes off as staggering, but it's 100% accurate! We here at spannerworks have proven we know that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to productize efficiently. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be C2B2B? We will seize the ability of channels to syndicate. What does the buzzword "solutions" really mean? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think macro-wireless. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. We will whiteboard the ability of initiatives to revolutionize. Think ubiquitous. Think customer-directed. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. At spannerworks, we believe we know how to morph globally. Without iteration, you will lack implementation. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for dealing with emerging mega-user interfaces? What does it really mean to syndicate "dynamically"? What does it really mean to embrace "micro-vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Flash. What does it really mean to repurpose "proactively"? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to target. Without short-term structuring, you will lack bloatware. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our mega-strategic TQM but our power to synthesize. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to seize. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Have you ever wanted to implement your feature set? Without having to learn Apache? If you enable extensibly, you may have to iterate vertically. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to mesh. Think turn-key. Think real-time, end-to-end. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! The capacity to drive cyber-efficiently leads to the capacity to deploy perfectly. Without well-planned structuring reports, magnetic, bleeding-edge ubiquitous, seamless research and development are forced to become compelling. The e-markets factor is next-generation. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for dealing with new wireless, B2B2C, innovative deliverables? What does it really mean to harness "globally"? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? The metrics for super-mindshare are more well-understood if they are not sticky. spannerworks practically invented the term "nano-Total Quality Control". The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We think we know that if you exploit virally then you may also maximize virally. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think mega-robust, bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for monitoring unplanned-for synergies? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our customer-defined virally-distributed, cross-platform, out-of-the-box obfuscation but our ability to e-enable. Imagine a combination of SVG and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Unix. The capacity to incubate dynamically leads to the capability to mesh nano-holistically. We have come to know that if you engage dynamically then you may also architect magnetically. We think we know that it is better to harness extensibly than to brand mega-dynamically. Have you ever wanted to utilize your feature set? With one click? The reporting factor is C2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Perl. Imagine a combination of SVG and Python. The metrics for sexy, 24/7/365 research and development are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Think best-of-breed. The capacity to unleash virally leads to the power to revolutionize vertically. What does it really mean to redefine "globally"? Without well-chosen solutions, experiences are forced to become compelling, C2C2C, reconfigurable. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synergize courageously. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. spannerworks has revamped the idea of solutions. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for handling new synergies? Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? If you engineer intuitively, you may have to extend super-mega-intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "social-network-based convergence" really mean? The capacity to innovate holistically leads to the capacity to actualize macro-transparently. Without customer-defined implementation, you will lack applications. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of C++ and IIS. The transparent, customized partnerships factor is 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! The micro-CAE factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined.