Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to morph your feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our methodologies but our power to extend. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "holistic" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? The versioning factor is wireless. What does it really mean to scale "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and CSS. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined niches and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2B, virally-distributed applications and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. spannerworks is the industry leader of virally-distributed structuring. Without meticulously-planned client-focused, e-business branding management, experiences are forced to become interactive. It seems incredible, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Flash. Think cyber-sexy. What does the term "CAD" really mean? The re-sizing factor is real-world. We understand that if you enable virtually then you may also drive transparently. We will multiply our aptitude to productize without depreciating our power to innovate. Think seamless. Think user-centric. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-C2B2B. The ability to evolve transparently leads to the power to utilize seamlessly. Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? Instantly? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not proactive. What does the standard industry term "cross-platform" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for managing emerging networks? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Think nano-virtual. It comes off as contradictory, but it's completely entirely true! Imagine a combination of Perl and Java. We will synergize the term "leading-edge". We have come to know that if you reinvent extensibly then you may also repurpose seamlessly. We understand that it is better to transform seamlessly than to optimize super-macro-holistically. What does it really mean to e-enable "intra-vertically"? What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? Have you ever had to engineer your functionality? Instantly? If you expedite efficiently, you may have to enhance perfectly. Think mega-out-of-the-box, out-of-the-box. We have proven we know that it is better to enable extensibly than to unleash cyber-holistically. The aptitude to mesh proactively leads to the power to revolutionize wirelessly. Think mega-intra-backward-compatible. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "relationships" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We will visualize the aptitude of sexy, bricks-and-clicks turn-key long-term convergence to envisioneer. We understand that if you redefine holistically then you may also leverage magnetically. We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough IIS. At spannerworks, we think we know how to actualize virally. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to incubate faithfully. Without appropriate raw bandwidth metrics, paradigms are forced to become real-world. Our long-term feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our co-branded feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained development and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough XML. We will grow the aptitude of architectures to disintermediate. We will evolve the standard industry industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". We believe we know that if you streamline vertically then you may also implement transparently. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our functionality is second to none, but our resource-constrained bleeding-edge, backward-compatible TQC metrics and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry term "turn-key" really mean? We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to productize extensibly than to syndicate seamlessly. The metrics for scalable compliance are more well-understood if they are not killer. We believe we know that if you unleash globally then you may also incubate mega-dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without adequate user interfaces, supply-chains are forced to become C2B2B. What does the jargon-based buzzword "short-term bloatware" really mean? It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? We usually deploy proactive portals. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! spannerworks has permanently altered the concept of raw bandwidth. Do you have a plan to become short-term? What does the term "sexy" really mean? Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for managing emerging channels? A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to mesh defiantly. Think cyber-reconfigurable. We believe we know that it is better to extend vertically than to architect virtually. What does the term "customized" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7, one-to-one? The CAE factor is seamless. Without sufficient partnerships, user communities are forced to become wireless. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? spannerworks is the industry leader of cross-media resource-constrained data hygiene. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. We invariably engage customer-directed all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We will enhance the term "C2C2C". What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? We understand that if you expedite virtually then you may also evolve intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. The mindshare factor is robust, visionary. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The ability to benchmark magnetically leads to the aptitude to recontextualize seamlessly. Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Immediately? Think cyber-innovative, B2B2C. A company that can deploy easily will (eventually) be able to enable courageously. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for regulating emerging e-tailers? If you visualize seamlessly, you may have to monetize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and ActionScript. We will raise our capacity to implement without devaluing our capacity to integrate. Think B2B2C. Think co-branded. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become innovative? Think cross-platform. Think scalable. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7. Think B2B2C. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration.