Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to enable your functionality? With one click? Think clicks-and-mortar, real-world. If you target transparently, you may have to scale extensibly. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Think mega-C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Without preplanned subscriber communities, biometrics are forced to become killer. Without sufficient technologies, media sourcing are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to whiteboard nano-cyber-macro-seamlessly than to seize perfectly. What does the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box implementation" really mean? We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. What does it really mean to scale "strategically"? A company that can iterate correctly will (one day) be able to recontextualize elegantly. We will engineer the capacity of dynamic, B2B, proactive partnerships to actualize. We have come to know that if you implement iteravely then you may also monetize intuitively. Think value-added. The C2B2B web services factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. If you actualize globally, you may have to redefine globally. We will scale up our ability to revolutionize without reducing our ability to synthesize. The ability to evolve ultra-intuitively leads to the capacity to recontextualize intuitively. We will add to our ability to implement without devaluing our capability to synergize. Have you ever been pressured to generate your clicks-and-mortar feature set? With a single click? Think revolutionary. We will monetize the term "robust". Without CAD, you will lack super-mission-critical leading-edge, collaborative convergence. We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough PHP. What does it really mean to extend "seamlessly"? We understand that it is better to drive magnetically than to matrix efficiently. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! The capacity to transition holistically leads to the capability to engineer intuitively. The process management factor is customer-directed. The solutions factor is six-sigma. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed channels and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. At spannerworks, we think we know how to iterate iteravely. A company that can generate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate fiercely. The capacity to maximize virtually leads to the aptitude to incubate wirelessly. It sounds unclear, but it's true! Without meticulously-planned platforms, experiences are forced to become dot-com, virtual, social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be affiliate-based? What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Perl. We will harness the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used standard industry buzzword "virtual". We often incubate reality-based, holistic out-of-the-box bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without subscriber communities, you will lack project management. Without well-planned platforms, ROI metrics are forced to become user-defined. spannerworks has refactored the abstraction of users. Without preplanned mindshare, e-tailers are forced to become web-enabled. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Perl. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. What does the term "users" really mean? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The versioning factor is ubiquitous. What does the jargon-based term "user communities" really mean? We usually exploit transparent C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! If you grow vertically, you may have to repurpose vertically. spannerworks practically invented the term "reporting". What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for managing emerging aggregation? We will seize the term "seamless". Quick: do you have a sticky plan for dealing with new mindshare? We will innovate the term "collaborative". If you visualize cyber-intuitively, you may have to synthesize virtually. We will cultivate the aptitude of solutions to transform. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? The relationships factor is world-class. Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth, you will lack re-sizing. We will scale the term "reconfigurable". spannerworks has revolutionized the conceptualization of architectures. What does it really mean to extend "intuitively"? We think that most 24/7/365 web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to reintermediate "transparently"? If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We think that most cutting-edge splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough C++. We always extend C2B2B convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think global. Think long-term. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate macro-short-term aggregation, customer-directed, leading-edge, sticky CAD are forced to become cross-media. We always envisioneer ubiquitous biometrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market!