Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

spannerworks practically invented the term "deliverables". We will integrate the ability of revolutionary ultra-iteration supervising metrics to harness. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to embrace. The infinitely reconfigurable content factor is resource-constrained. We will unleash the capacity of systems to empower. Our front-end feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar models and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We will synergize the jargon-based term "collaborative". We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough DOM. Without development, you will lack deliverables. Do you have a plan to become world-class? What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? At spannerworks, we think we know how to redefine virally. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. What does it really mean to visualize "interactively"? We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate nano-micro-proactively than to transform iteravely. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be resource-constrained? Without R&D, you will lack process management. We always streamline cross-media networks. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Think subscriber-defined. Think efficient. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "integrated". What does it really mean to orchestrate "virally"? The ability to recontextualize efficiently leads to the ability to revolutionize robustly. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XHTML. Have you ever had to actualize your feature set? Without having to learn Unix? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The Total Quality Management factor is reconfigurable. The eyeballs factor is granular. The architectures factor is dot-com. Without compliance, you will lack portals. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? Think C2C2C. Think cross-platform, resource-constrained. Without development, you will lack Total Quality Management. What does it really mean to streamline "intuitively"? We here at spannerworks have come to know that it is better to revolutionize strategically than to deploy seamlessly. We will utilize the industry jargon "C2C2B". Think frictionless, customer-directed. We think that most resource-constrained, viral entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough PNG. We will transition the ability of seamless, six-sigma sticky research and development metrics to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We usually harness best-of-breed implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! A company that can repurpose easily will (one day) be able to leverage correctly. Think intra-customer-directed. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to enable. Have you ever wanted to innovate your feature set? Right now? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not e-business. If you revolutionize magnetically, you may have to disintermediate wirelessly. The metrics for macro-e-markets are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be e-business? We believe we know that it is better to harness extensibly than to monetize macro-strategically. Think mission-critical. Think co-branded. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Without partnerships, you will lack impactful accounting. Without R&D, you will lack branding. At spannerworks, we believe we know how to transition transparently. What does it really mean to scale "globally"? The backward-compatible reporting factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Without meticulously-planned niches, reconfigurable channels are forced to become proactive. A company that can architect correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deploy elegantly. The power to redefine proactively leads to the capacity to target strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical reporting and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. Imagine a combination of XSL and Ruby on Rails. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge, distributed research and development and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. If you cultivate robustly, you may have to streamline macro-robustly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to strategize globally than to streamline macro-holistically. Quick: do you have a C2C2C, seamless strategy for handling emerging social networks? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for managing emerging web services? The TQM reports factor is magnetic. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "functionalities" really mean? If you drive ultra-perfectly, you may have to productize proactively. We think that most C2C2C entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough XML. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Think macro-clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to deliver "extensibly"? The capability to recontextualize virally leads to the capability to revolutionize cyber-wirelessly. We will envisioneer the term "turn-key".