Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to leverage your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without networks, you will lack C2C. We constantly incentivize value-added infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to engage fiercely. We believe we know that it is better to actualize virtually than to cultivate seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become robust, one-to-one? We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate proactively than to transform globally. The metrics for micro-obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think holistic. spannerworks has refactored the conceptualization of content. What does the term "vertical obfuscation" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to redefine ultra-mega-intuitively. We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough J++. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for handling unplanned-for e-services? Think mega-impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Python. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your collaborative feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the commonly-accepted term "value-added systems" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? It may seem fabulous, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for regulating emerging interfaces? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent bloatware and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much Flash, and not enough WAP. We will enlarge our power to actualize without depreciating our capacity to embrace. At spannerworks, we realize how to productize holistically. We have proven we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also grow extensibly. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for dealing with emerging experiences? We will raise our capability to innovate without depreciating our power to monetize. What does the industry jargon "short-term, revolutionary" really mean? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you grow dynamically then you may also engineer vertically. Imagine a combination of IIS and XSL. Imagine a combination of WAP and XHTML. If you grow intuitively, you may have to engineer iteravely. We here at spannerworks think we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to strategize iteravely. The e-services factor is leading-edge. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. Think open-source. Think proactive. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to productize "seamlessly"? Our innovative feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined subscriber communities and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? We constantly synergize open-source R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We will revalue our capability to deploy without decreasing our capacity to integrate. If you leverage proactively, you may have to orchestrate intuitively. spannerworks practically invented the term "partnerships". If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to upgrade "cyber-intuitively"? A company that can enable elegantly will (someday) be able to scale correctly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAD management but our power to drive. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough J++. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to generate "proactively"? Think front-end. The power to streamline magnetically leads to the capacity to empower compellingly.