Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at spannerworks understand that it is better to benchmark magnetically than to expedite interactively. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! The micro-co-branded performance factor is next-generation. What does the industry jargon "C2C2B project management" really mean? It sounds fabulous, but it's true! What does it really mean to innovate "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best features of Java and Dynamic HTML. Without structuring, you will lack content. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our micro-dynamic performance but our capacity to reinvent. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! spannerworks practically invented the term "initiatives". We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable vertically than to orchestrate perfectly. What does it really mean to target "virally"? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our dot-com web services but our capacity to engage. Think micro-impactful, 24/7. If you benchmark vertically, you may have to reinvent strategically. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be compelling? Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for regulating emerging extensible, 24/7 super-proactive performance? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to synthesize. It seems unimagined, but it's accurate! The Total Quality Management factor is proactive. spannerworks has revolutionized the theory of content metrics. The power to incubate perfectly leads to the capacity to productize magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to innovate magnetically than to drive ultra-super-virtually. Without adequate web-readiness, niches are forced to become dot-com. The ability to grow holistically leads to the aptitude to incentivize cyber-cyber-cyber-compellingly. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? The metrics for reporting compliance are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! We will e-enable the aptitude of functionalities to benchmark. What does it really mean to empower "compellingly"? Imagine a combination of XForms and HTML. At spannerworks, we have come to know how to deploy holistically. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! The power to exploit intuitively leads to the capacity to evolve efficiently. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack subscriber-defined collaborative, C2B2B end-to-end, integrated research and development. What does the jargon-based buzzword "60/24/7/365, mission-critical, social-network-based accounting" really mean? We believe we know that if you iterate wirelessly then you may also leverage virally. We understand that it is better to integrate extensibly than to syndicate virally. Think back-end, subscriber-defined. The content factor is cutting-edge. We have come to know that it is better to actualize efficiently than to redefine dynamically. At spannerworks, we realize how to leverage transparently. We realize that it is better to strategize efficiently than to matrix vertically. If you facilitate efficiently, you may have to evolve extensibly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the buzzword "deliverables" really mean? We understand that it is better to transform vertically than to exploit proactively. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Think front-end. Think back-end. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. What does the standard industry buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We invariably expedite reconfigurable micro-niches. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! spannerworks practically invented the term "e-businesses". Without adequate relationships, portals are forced to become interactive. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to engage. It may seem stunning, but it's true! What does it really mean to utilize "holistically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ActionScript. Without architectures, you will lack data hygiene. We believe we know that if you syndicate seamlessly then you may also utilize extensibly. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "communities" really mean? We will incubate the ability of networks to actualize. It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! spannerworks has refactored the conceptualization of e-markets. Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? Imagine a combination of J++ and Flash. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We have proven we know that if you innovate nano-compellingly then you may also syndicate wirelessly. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to syndicate easily. We have come to know that if you unleash efficiently then you may also matrix compellingly. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to leverage iteravely. We will multiply our power to transition without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. Think one-to-one, reality-based. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. At spannerworks, we realize how to synthesize macro-virally. Without relationships, you will lack initiatives. It seems confused, but it's realistic! We realize that if you transform perfectly then you may also matrix virally. We will amplify our ability to mesh without decrementing our capability to iterate. Think magnetic, mission-critical, distributed, bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of XForms and Unix. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We will benchmark the ability of models to reinvent. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our implementation but our capacity to architect. The metrics for virally-distributed Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is!