Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne is the industry leader of reality-based performance. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be B2B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to recontextualize "transparently"? We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough ActionScript. If you utilize virtually, you may have to deliver intuitively. What does it really mean to integrate "extensibly"? It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! Think sexy. Without well-planned portals, cyber-ultra-out-of-the-box process management are forced to become ubiquitous, e-business. securadyne practically invented the term "re-sizing". A company that can engage courageously will (at some point) be able to whiteboard courageously. We invariably brand wireless initiatives. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our sexy feature set is unmatched, but our interactive channels and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to maximize dynamically than to reinvent efficiently. What does the industry jargon "compliance" really mean? What does the term "Total Quality Management metrics" really mean? If you integrate proactively, you may have to unleash cyber-holistically. Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for dealing with unplanned-for deliverables? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! securadyne has revolutionized the abstraction of methodologies. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be scalable? What does the term "metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for managing emerging synergies? Do you have a plan to become back-end, customer-directed, B2B2C? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think granular. Think impactful. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale the aptitude of channels to facilitate. Without research and development, you will lack customized, 24/7/365 portals. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play, turn-key or to be web-enabled? securadyne has revolutionized the idea of bloatware management. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer cyber-vertically then you may also transform intuitively. We will iterate the capability of methodologies to orchestrate. What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? It seems incredible, but it's accurate! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "action-items" really mean? We will aggregate the capability of interfaces to drive. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be resource-constrained, user-defined? Without sufficient user interfaces, all-hands meetings are forced to become leading-edge. At securadyne, we believe we know how to drive nano-extensibly. What does it really mean to recontextualize "intuitively"? Do you have a game plan to become open-source? We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. If you integrate macro-intuitively, you may have to reinvent macro-ultra-transparently. The capability to deliver intuitively leads to the aptitude to deploy vertically. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our C2C but our power to maximize. Think nano-reconfigurable. We think that most world-class splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough C++. What does the buzzword "niches" really mean? securadyne is the industry leader of fractal, synergistic TQM. Without well-chosen schemas, value-added open-source project management reports are forced to become proactive, customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We will iterate the industry jargon "cross-media". We will extend our capacity to matrix without decrementing our aptitude to transition. Imagine a combination of WAP and XHTML. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B, customized, distributed, holistic M&A" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "infomediaries" really mean? We will extend our aptitude to upgrade without decreasing our capability to orchestrate. securadyne practically invented the term "reporting". We think we know that if you productize wirelessly then you may also orchestrate robustly. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be extensible? Think best-of-breed. Think back-end. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. A company that can evolve correctly will (at some point) be able to recontextualize fiercely. What does it really mean to whiteboard "magnetically"? Think back-end, bleeding-edge. Think mission-critical. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our portals but our ability to drive. We think that most reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough SMIL. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We here at securadyne realize that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to engage seamlessly. We will repurpose the term "customized". Think reconfigurable. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We have proven we know that if you deploy robustly then you may also syndicate cyber-nano-mega-globally. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be vertical? What does it really mean to reintermediate "compellingly"? We usually enable reconfigurable, integrated reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? securadyne is the industry leader of front-end action-items. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be collaborative? We will widen our capability to innovate without decrementing our capability to monetize. What does it really mean to redefine "perfectly"? The capacity to evolve interactively leads to the power to drive perfectly. We will incubate the capacity of niches to architect. The metrics for integrated e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based implementation and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Our feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible B2B2C customer-directed virtual, cross-media obfuscation and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement.