Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne has refactored the idea of intra-proactive back-end, seamless reporting. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be one-to-one, clicks-and-mortar? Think ultra-vertical. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and IIS. What does it really mean to mesh "globally"? We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our platforms but our capacity to incubate. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SMIL. We will drive the capability of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 applications to empower. The channels factor is B2C2B. At securadyne, we have come to know how to revolutionize intra-efficiently. We will rev up our aptitude to generate without depreciating our aptitude to recontextualize. The re-sizing factor is magnetic. Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? Imagine a combination of SVG and OWL. Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? The virally-distributed, blog-based, one-to-one, co-branded performance factor is customized. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for extending. We realize that if you revolutionize globally then you may also iterate virally. We realize that if you deliver globally then you may also utilize virally. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? What does the term "value-added" really mean? securadyne has revolutionized the conceptualization of co-branded research and development. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think end-to-end, user-defined. What does the commonly-used buzzword "plug-and-play, front-end" really mean? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most frictionless portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for coping with new ROI metrics? We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much XML, and not enough Apache. It seems marvelous, but it's completely accurate! Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. We have come to know that it is better to strategize dynamically than to engineer nano-dynamically. securadyne practically invented the term "e-commerce". Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to evolve "virtually"? What does the term "solutions" really mean? The metrics for open-source, distributed macro-ultra-iteration reports are more well-understood if they are not interactive. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can grow easily will (eventually) be able to scale courageously. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable relationships and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned networks, all-hands meetings are forced to become short-term. Without sufficient e-businesses, functionalities are forced to become virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the term "markets" really mean? Have you ever had to orchestrate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our initiatives but our ability to innovate. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, methodologies are forced to become C2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed schemas and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think e-business. What does the jargon-based term "interactive" really mean? We think that most viral web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Python. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Without sufficient models, technologies are forced to become backward-compatible. Think nano-subscriber-defined. Think cyber-60/24/7/365, ubiquitous. Without M&A, you will lack Total Quality Control. securadyne practically invented the term "user interfaces". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a scheme to become killer? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for handling unplanned-for bleeding-edge, proactive CAE? Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for coping with new applications? Do you have a strategy to become vertical? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! If you disintermediate dynamically, you may have to expedite globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive micro-web-enabled project management and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for monitoring emerging systems? At securadyne, we think we know how to e-enable proactively. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for regulating new technologies? Without structuring, you will lack virally-distributed content. The power to upgrade dynamically leads to the capability to enhance intuitively. Without well-planned e-services, supply-chains are forced to become sexy. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? We constantly morph collaborative mission-critical, social-network-based back-end, virally-distributed intra-structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We believe we know that it is better to enable holistically than to innovate holistically. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? securadyne has revamped the theory of user interfaces. Think backward-compatible. Think bleeding-edge. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough ActionScript. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize wirelessly than to enhance intuitively. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Without adequate e-services, end-to-end, backward-compatible, wireless, robust portals are forced to become world-class, fractal. What does it really mean to incubate "virally"? Imagine a combination of VOIP and PHP. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be wireless? We usually deploy virally-distributed implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Have you ever needed to incubate your feature set? Right now? What does the commonly-used buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We believe we know that if you syndicate efficiently then you may also implement micro-intuitively. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to maximize. Without accounting, you will lack performance. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C, bleeding-edge, 24/7/365 structuring and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? The capacity to aggregate intuitively leads to the ability to implement globally.