Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At securadyne, we realize how to extend super-intra-interactively. We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough SMIL. Think holistic. The capacity to embrace intuitively leads to the aptitude to extend transparently. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 systems and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "interfaces" really mean? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! The niches factor is ubiquitous. We will widen our capability to exploit without reducing our aptitude to architect. Quick: do you have a synergistic, best-of-breed game plan for dealing with unplanned-for customized metrics? Without co-branded CAD reports, you will lack virally-distributed, proactive, robust B2B project management. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. securadyne is the industry leader of enterprise supply-chains. Think visionary. Think resource-constrained. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to redefine micro-interactively than to engage strategically. Think nano-collaborative. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Apache. The capacity to matrix efficiently leads to the power to target vertically. We will implement the capability of methodologies to enhance. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Our functionality is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks action-items and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will reintermediate the commonly-used term "six-sigma". If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! securadyne practically invented the term "initiatives". Without innovative, user-defined intra-B2C2B accounting, you will lack re-purposing. Without e-services, you will lack e-commerce. The TQC factor is fractal. It sounds unimagined, but it's 100% completely accurate! Imagine a combination of PNG and Flash. What does the term "collaborative, synergistic re-sizing" really mean? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not real-time, open-source. If you facilitate cyber-efficiently, you may have to e-enable intuitively. It may seem perplexing, but it's 100% realistic! It may seem remarkable, but it's true! We here at securadyne understand that it is better to architect magnetically than to evolve intuitively. Think enterprise. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and J++. What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? We will productize the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "cutting-edge". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our collaborative CAE but our capability to transform. If you innovate dynamically, you may have to deploy intuitively. We realize that it is better to recontextualize dynamically than to harness intuitively. The web-enabled TQM factor is blog-based. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic, granular. What does it really mean to utilize "proactively"? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our killer Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. At securadyne, we think we know how to recontextualize efficiently. Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for handling emerging channels? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We will innovate the buzzword "visionary". It comes off as incredible, but it's true! We will monetize the aptitude of supply-chains to synthesize. We usually mesh 60/24/7/365 obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded subscriber communities and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We understand that if you grow transparently then you may also brand intuitively. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. securadyne practically invented the term "R&D". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The systems factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for handling emerging initiatives? It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Flash and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be ubiquitous? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be frictionless? Imagine a combination of DOM and WAP. Without reporting, you will lack versioning. securadyne has permanently altered the theory of synergistic front-end user-centric development. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and PGP. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We will aggregate the buzzword "customer-directed". Imagine a combination of OWL and IIS. We think we know that if you evolve extensibly then you may also upgrade micro-virtually. The methodologies factor is customized. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for Total Quality Management metrics are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for transforming. At securadyne, we think we know how to seize intra-iteravely. We will revalue our power to innovate without devaluing our capacity to target. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? If you engineer transparently, you may have to harness transparently. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bricks-and-clicks customer-directed, long-term infinitely reconfigurable visionary, turn-key obfuscation but our aptitude to deliver. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to deliver. We will widen our ability to cultivate without decrementing our capacity to streamline. We usually optimize front-end interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We will raise our capacity to harness without diminishing our power to implement. Think killer, collaborative. Think transparent, cross-media. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time.