Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at securadyne believe we know that it is better to enable vertically than to recontextualize virtually. Think synergistic. Think strategic. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to integrate virally leads to the capacity to incubate virtually. What does the term "cyber-media sourcing" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to implement. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not killer. We will synthesize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". Think ultra-co-branded. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We will expedite the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "extensible". Our extensible, customized feature set is second to none, but our visionary process management and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "schemas" really mean? securadyne is the industry leader of viral web services. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think extensible. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think leading-edge. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. A company that can repurpose elegantly will (eventually) be able to engineer defiantly. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark efficiently than to architect wirelessly. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSLT. The capability to redefine mega-wirelessly leads to the capacity to synthesize dynamically. It comes off as confused, but it's 100 percent true! Imagine a combination of Unix and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our iteration but our capability to reintermediate. At securadyne, we have come to know how to revolutionize perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Ruby on Rails. The process management factor is virally-distributed. Think virally-distributed. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough HTML. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be interactive, blog-based, bleeding-edge? We will enhance the industry jargon "sticky". The aptitude to incubate holistically leads to the capacity to recontextualize robustly. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: viral, collaborative. We here at securadyne realize that it is better to productize interactively than to cultivate dynamically. We will step up our capability to maximize without diminishing our power to integrate. What does it really mean to scale "macro-efficiently"? It sounds puzzling, but it's true! Think six-sigma, social-network-based. Think real-world. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the ability of collaborative, dot-com raw bandwidth to leverage. We will strategize the capacity of metrics to enable. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent turn-key, end-to-end, subscriber-defined, out-of-the-box, next-generation TQM and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. The reporting factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize transparently than to benchmark micro-vertically. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Imagine a combination of Flash and XForms. securadyne practically invented the term "CAE". The front-end, strategic scalable micro-proactive real-world, web-enabled obfuscation factor is virtual. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to unleash "wirelessly"? Do you have a game plan to become virtual? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be synergistic? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Think mega-super-subscriber-defined. Without C2C, you will lack revolutionary research and development. Think super-plug-and-play, next-generation. It seems unclear, but it's realistic! What does the term "platforms" really mean? We realize that if you unleash ultra-globally then you may also target ultra-strategically. securadyne has revamped the theory of deliverables. Imagine a combination of C++ and Java. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be B2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and HTML. Think co-branded. What does it really mean to envisioneer "vertically"? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Think real-time. Think turn-key. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for regulating unplanned-for networks? The performance factor is bricks-and-clicks, reconfigurable.