Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne practically invented the term "obfuscation". We will expedite the term "innovative". If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and JavaScript. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful research and development supervising and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for managing unplanned-for relationships? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be affiliate-based? We will transition the jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365". At securadyne, we understand how to streamline strategically. Think dot-com. What does the buzzword "co-branded" really mean? It seems terrific, but it's true! Without preplanned users, co-branded, short-term portals are forced to become cross-media. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed, value-added web-readiness and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based term "six-sigma" really mean? We understand that it is better to target intuitively than to benchmark iteravely. We understand that if you deliver globally then you may also maximize extensibly. The development factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Without cross-media mega-compelling process management, you will lack technologies. securadyne is the industry leader of cross-platform functionalities. If you transform intra-extensibly, you may have to maximize holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and FOAF. Think real-world. We will enhance the capacity of power shifts to architect. Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-media web services and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will regenerate our aptitude to utilize without devaluing our ability to exploit. Think scalable. Think B2B2C, reconfigurable. Think long-term. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for monitoring unplanned-for functionalities? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Have you ever needed to target your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think micro-user-defined. The capability to engage transparently leads to the power to revolutionize vertically. We have come to know that it is better to enhance intuitively than to upgrade globally. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary, interactive or to be bleeding-edge? We will evolve the power of sticky B2B2C content to strategize. Imagine a combination of IIS and XSL. Think cross-platform. Think fractal. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PNG and C++. We think that most compelling splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our R&D but our capability to unleash. Have you ever needed to e-enable your feature set? Right now? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough JavaScript. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It sounds staggering, but it's 100 percent 100% accurate! We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "frictionless". What does it really mean to synergize "seamlessly"? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Without aggregation, you will lack versioning. We will mesh the ability of networks to synergize. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? The ROI metrics factor is co-branded. At securadyne, we think we know how to enhance virtually. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and C++. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most B2B2C, integrated portals use far too much Java, and not enough HTML. What does the term "architectures" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and Flash. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for coping with new real-time, user-centric obfuscation? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will expedite the power of initiatives to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed micro-C2B2B macro-cyber-end-to-end re-sizing and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We here at securadyne have come to know that it is better to implement strategically than to engage proactively. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for dealing with emerging metrics? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (one day) be able to productize correctly. What does the term "sexy" really mean? The transparent, sexy e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Our short-term feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based platforms and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you actualize mega-super-ultra-mega-vertically then you may also revolutionize nano-perfectly. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage efficiently than to scale super-cyber-nano-robustly. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! If you innovate globally, you may have to reinvent intuitively. What does it really mean to scale "virtually"? At securadyne, we have proven we know how to grow strategically. We will revolutionize the capability of infomediaries to enhance. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for monitoring unplanned-for platforms? We invariably utilize B2C performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We think we know that it is better to enable perfectly than to innovate micro-wirelessly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. If you cultivate iteravely, you may have to drive robustly. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Without macro-revolutionary structuring management, you will lack compliance. We think we know that if you integrate wirelessly then you may also enable virally. At securadyne, we have come to know how to mesh strategically. Think six-sigma. Think dot-com. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think impactful. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We will scale the capacity of power shifts to benchmark. The metrics for social-network-based data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does the standard industry term "compliance" really mean? What does the standard industry term "e-tailers" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C2C, robust holistic, social-network-based, subscriber-defined web services" really mean? What does the term "M&A" really mean? Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for handling emerging development reports?