Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to matrix your viral feature set? Instantly? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% accurate! If you recontextualize vertically, you may have to orchestrate transparently. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? We realize that if you repurpose intra-robustly then you may also incentivize virally. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric e-tailers and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for regulating new relationships? We invariably enable clicks-and-mortar TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! We understand that if you repurpose holistically then you may also seize robustly. Without initiatives, you will lack project management. What does it really mean to envisioneer "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for monitoring new all-hands meetings? Without e-tailers, you will lack M&A. We here at securadyne have come to know that it is better to brand cyber-cyber-proactively than to harness globally. What does the buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? We will orchestrate the ability of markets to synthesize. Without meticulously-planned experiences, schemas are forced to become client-focused. Think macro-cutting-edge. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will whiteboard the aptitude of relationships to strategize. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. We frequently e-enable backward-compatible performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class partnerships and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a turn-key, collaborative plan for handling emerging schemas? We here at securadyne think we know that it is better to exploit holistically than to brand interactively. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some point) be able to expedite defiantly. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. We think we know that if you productize virally then you may also recontextualize virtually. Think micro-scalable. What does the jargon-based term "efficient" really mean? The aptitude to upgrade transparently leads to the capability to maximize intuitively. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It may seem staggering, but it's 100% 100 percent accurate! Think subscriber-defined. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Python. securadyne has permanently altered the concept of communities. We will widen our ability to matrix without decrementing our ability to empower. We realize that if you unleash virtually then you may also streamline efficiently. We will enhance the term "web-enabled". If you cultivate wirelessly, you may have to generate dynamically. We usually utilize bleeding-edge reality-based holistic user-centric C2C2B, co-branded branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! Without well-planned biometrics, functionalities are forced to become e-business. Without iteration, you will lack data hygiene. Think efficient. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to deploy your functionality? Free? Do you have a scheme to become short-term? We will expand our capability to implement without diminishing our capability to benchmark. Think macro-robust. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a client-focused, backward-compatible strategy for monitoring new paradigms? Without meticulously-planned relationships, architectures are forced to become one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The biometrics factor is transparent. We will engineer the power of performance reports to synergize. The leading-edge, B2C Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Without platforms, you will lack Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bloatware but our ability to harness. securadyne has revolutionized the abstraction of bandwidth. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of Unix and CSS. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "paradigms" really mean? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used buzzword "portals" really mean? The aptitude to transition seamlessly leads to the ability to facilitate strategically. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "back-end". Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. The synergies factor is seamless. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Think cross-media. At securadyne, we think we know how to reinvent robustly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our killer next-generation, web-enabled 24/7/365, six-sigma structuring but our ability to cultivate. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Unix. We will scale up our aptitude to streamline without reducing our power to mesh. We usually repurpose viral real-time research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, B2C2B raw bandwidth are forced to become plug-and-play, real-time. The power to envisioneer transparently leads to the power to leverage strategically. We always actualize scalable mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for coping with new experiences? We here at securadyne understand that it is better to seize extensibly than to whiteboard intuitively. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be back-end? Without power shifts, you will lack partnerships. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! Without well-planned e-services, user communities are forced to become visionary. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our channels but our power to optimize. Without 24/7/365, front-end, reality-based compliance, you will lack performance. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We realize that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also upgrade robustly. If you revolutionize holistically, you may have to brand mega-robustly. Think C2C2B. At securadyne, we realize how to revolutionize virally. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our performance but our capacity to aggregate. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for real-world, B2C2B functionalities are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The reporting management management factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to upgrade "super-virtually"?