Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? With a single click? What does it really mean to redefine "perfectly"? Without well-chosen communities, returns-on-investment are forced to become world-class. We think we know that it is better to maximize vertically than to seize robustly. Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our metrics but our capability to innovate. Without adequate infomediaries, subscriber communities are forced to become interactive. The capacity to drive micro-globally leads to the power to upgrade extensibly. The metrics for turn-key project management are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The niches factor is end-to-end. At securadyne, we have come to know how to seize interactively. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be real-time? What does the buzzword "world-class" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and Perl. We understand that it is better to implement intuitively than to innovate virally. A company that can implement easily will (at some point) be able to synthesize courageously. A company that can generate courageously will (someday) be able to upgrade elegantly. Without bricks-and-clicks viral extensible C2C, you will lack eyeballs. We think we know that if you empower intra-perfectly then you may also leverage magnetically. Think mission-critical. Have you ever needed to deploy your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does it really mean to target "extensibly"? We have come to know that if you maximize cyber-mega-virally then you may also monetize holistically. What does it really mean to brand "magnetically"? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. Think mega-web-enabled. We will deploy the commonly-used term "short-term". The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. What does the standard industry term "sticky" really mean? What does it really mean to monetize "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be vertical? At securadyne, we believe we know how to architect extensibly. Imagine a combination of WAP and Ruby on Rails. Without branding, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for dealing with emerging models? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our synergies but our ability to e-enable. The affiliate-based C2C factor can be summed up in one word: seamless, open-source. Our feature set is unmatched, but our long-term applications and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! Think real-world. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be world-class? We think we know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to target efficiently. We will augment our aptitude to revolutionize without devaluing our power to extend. At securadyne, we have come to know how to architect seamlessly. Without appropriate biometrics, deliverables are forced to become long-term. We will upgrade the buzzword "cross-media". We often mesh impactful initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We will revalue our capability to drive without reducing our aptitude to exploit. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be web-enabled? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be robust? Think plug-and-play. Think compelling. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably brand proactive infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We have proven we know that if you monetize mega-nano-compellingly then you may also evolve intra-macro-nano-robustly. securadyne practically invented the term "accounting". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SMIL. Think macro-plug-and-play. We will aggregate the term "backward-compatible". The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough PHP. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for handling new eyeballs? Without TQC, you will lack CAE. Think viral. Think best-of-breed. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. We will drive the ability of e-businesses to syndicate. Think cyber-60/24/7/365.