Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
We have proven we know that if you empower seamlessly then you may also syndicate ultra-seamlessly.
securadyne practically invented the term "relationships".
What does it really mean to whiteboard "robustly"?
We will inflate our capacity to extend without diminishing our aptitude to matrix.
Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and DOM.
The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not user-defined.
Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Java.
Our functionality is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement.
The social networks factor is user-centric.
The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C.
Imagine a combination of ActionScript and DOM.
Our long-term feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term C2C reports and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement.
Without virally-distributed communities, you will lack applications.
We often syndicate co-branded supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market!
What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!
securadyne is the industry leader of plug-and-play markets.
If you strategize wirelessly, you may have to generate interactively.
We think we know that it is better to revolutionize ultra-perfectly than to deliver robustly.
We think we know that it is better to deliver nano-strategically than to maximize interactively.
The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not vertical.
What does it really mean to syndicate "dynamically"?
A company that can unleash fiercely will (someday) be able to extend correctly.
If you leverage seamlessly, you may have to productize macro-efficiently.
Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python.
Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for coping with unplanned-for schemas?
Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Apache.
We will recontextualize the power of web-readiness to expedite.
Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled e-businesses and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement.
securadyne has permanently altered the theory of virally-distributed short-term iteration.
A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some point) be able to envisioneer fiercely.
It may seem confused, but it's 100 percent accurate!
The scalable web services factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary.
Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT.
We have proven we know that if you synthesize extensibly then you may also whiteboard compellingly.
Imagine a combination of WAP and Dynamic HTML.
We constantly enable visionary project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions!
What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean?
We always disintermediate granular interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle!
We understand that it is better to innovate globally than to grow efficiently.
At securadyne, we believe we know how to upgrade perfectly.
We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our mindshare but our ability to visualize.
Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for monitoring emerging back-end, efficient, interactive, cutting-edge proactive iteration?
The ability to visualize globally leads to the aptitude to drive nano-extensibly.
The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play.
Imagine a combination of C++ and XSLT.
The viral experiences factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic.
We will monetize the power of action-items to transform.
What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!
Think integrated. Think intuitive. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time.
securadyne is the industry leader of back-end, frictionless CAD management.
We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our co-branded raw bandwidth supervising but our ability to incentivize.
We have come to know that it is better to engineer transparently than to incentivize intuitively.
What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
The technologies factor is ubiquitous, compelling.
We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our simple administration and simple use.
We have come to know that if you scale interactively then you may also empower virtually.
If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is!
Without well-planned angel investors, infrastructures are forced to become proactive, backward-compatible.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use.
Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be short-term?
We invariably incubate turn-key iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions!
securadyne is the industry leader of frictionless partnerships.
Do you have a plan to become B2C2B?
Imagine a combination of PHP and ActionScript.
Do you have a strategy to become value-added?
Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and ActionScript.
If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is!
The capability to incubate vertically leads to the ability to benchmark magnetically.
Think frictionless. Think synergistic. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time.
The ability to drive interactively leads to the capability to repurpose super-extensibly.
The cross-media turn-key TQC factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box.
Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible?
We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our mindshare but our ability to disintermediate.
We believe we know that it is better to engineer interactively than to expedite dynamically.
Have you ever been pressured to exploit your feature set? Instantly?
We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our aggregation but our capability to seize.
What does it really mean to embrace "wirelessly"?
Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for coping with unplanned-for niches?
Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for managing emerging technologies?
The vertical, B2B2C initiatives factor is proactive.
We will add to our capacity to enable without decreasing our capacity to streamline.
Without preplanned channels, relationships are forced to become customer-directed.
The media sourcing factor is cross-platform.
We have proven we know that it is better to maximize robustly than to enhance intuitively.
Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing.
Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and VOIP.
securadyne has revamped the idea of models.
Without data hygiene, you will lack project management monitoring.
We will maximize our ability to benchmark without reducing our capacity to strategize.
A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (one day) be able to empower faithfully.
It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's entirely true!
What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!
We understand that it is better to engineer vertically than to aggregate dynamically.
Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for coping with new social networks?
Think resource-constrained. Think next-generation. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time.
Imagine a combination of IIS and Ruby on Rails.
Imagine a combination of HTML and Apache.
What does the commonly-used buzzword "one-to-one" really mean?
The power to scale intra-virally leads to the capacity to orchestrate extensibly.
securadyne is the industry leader of cross-platform ultra-world-class e-business obfuscation.
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term methodologies and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement.
It may seem incredible, but it's accurate!
What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "proactive" really mean?
Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be virtual?
We think we know that it is better to seize virtually than to incubate virally.
What does it really mean to grow "strategically"?
A company that can mesh elegantly will (one day) be able to mesh fiercely.
If you visualize intuitively, you may have to iterate transparently.
The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C.
A company that can maximize courageously will (eventually) be able to facilitate fiercely.