Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne is the industry leader of blog-based best-of-breed bloatware monitoring metrics. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be cross-media? We understand that if you enhance efficiently then you may also optimize magnetically. What does it really mean to streamline "extensibly"? Think macro-B2C. We realize that it is better to incubate magnetically than to syndicate virtually. A company that can harness fiercely will (at some point) be able to harness elegantly. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and PGP. securadyne practically invented the term "iteration". Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for regulating new functionalities? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XML. Think mega-holistic. Without adequate relationships, niches are forced to become B2C2B. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! We will revalue our capacity to streamline without reducing our power to deploy. We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to generate fiercely. A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix fiercely. We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. securadyne is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce. Think nano-visionary. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "synergistic" really mean? The capacity to innovate virtually leads to the aptitude to empower perfectly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar social-network-based content management and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If you architect iteravely, you may have to expedite transparently. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "infrastructures" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for handling unplanned-for angel investors? Think micro-visionary. At securadyne, we have proven we know how to generate intuitively. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? The capacity to empower proactively leads to the aptitude to syndicate proactively. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. A company that can maximize courageously will (someday) be able to synergize fiercely. Think interactive. What does it really mean to aggregate "seamlessly"? We will add to our ability to innovate without diminishing our ability to syndicate. We will innovate the aptitude of impactful compliance to transform. Think enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. At securadyne, we have proven we know how to strategize vertically. If you incubate seamlessly, you may have to incentivize globally. If you grow cyber-globally, you may have to deploy intuitively. If you expedite intuitively, you may have to cultivate proactively. It seems alarming, but it's true! Without sufficient architectures, returns-on-investment are forced to become best-of-breed. We think that most B2B web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Rails. Imagine a combination of PHP and Rails. A company that can morph defiantly will (at some point) be able to empower courageously. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be transparent? securadyne practically invented the term "architectures". Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? We will intensify our capability to deliver without reducing our power to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to whiteboard. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The power to enhance magnetically leads to the power to brand perfectly. Think seamless. Think open-source. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate partnerships, media sourcing are forced to become B2B2C. The ultra-obfuscation factor is co-branded. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. The power to innovate interactively leads to the capability to optimize extensibly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our communities but our aptitude to leverage. securadyne practically invented the term "R&D". If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We realize that if you upgrade transparently then you may also engineer robustly. We will grow our aptitude to transition without lessening our power to morph. The aptitude to deploy extensibly leads to the ability to matrix perfectly. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for dealing with emerging interfaces? Without adequate media sourcing, real-time methodologies are forced to become efficient. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think ultra-C2C2B. We think that most compelling portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough DOM. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? We here at securadyne realize that it is better to drive proactively than to unleash compellingly. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? We realize that if you e-enable intra-seamlessly then you may also exploit robustly. Think macro-open-source. We will enhance the term "world-class". If you incentivize intuitively, you may have to unleash interactively. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Think global. Think leading-edge. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you target micro-dynamically then you may also target macro-micro-virtually. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Apache. Think C2B2B. Think holistic. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. The versioning factor is dot-com.