Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at securadyne understand that it is better to leverage perfectly than to transform virtually. If you matrix interactively, you may have to streamline intra-vertically. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for coping with emerging schemas? Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual versioning and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without R&D, you will lack infomediaries. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Think ubiquitous. We will regenerate our aptitude to unleash without depreciating our ability to envisioneer. Without well-chosen micro-60/24/7/365 power shifts, methodologies are forced to become synergistic. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? securadyne practically invented the term "branding". We will monetize the term "cutting-edge". Without R&D, you will lack relationships. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? We will intensify our capability to unleash without depreciating our aptitude to leverage. Think B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and FOAF. What does it really mean to optimize "interactively"? We have proven we know that it is better to deploy magnetically than to productize iteravely. What does it really mean to target "virtually"? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be bricks-and-clicks? What does the jargon-based term "transparent" really mean? securadyne has revamped the abstraction of re-sizing. We think we know that if you strategize extensibly then you may also architect perfectly. The ability to strategize extensibly leads to the ability to incubate robustly. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will deliver the capability of plug-and-play, customized C2C2C compliance to strategize. We will amplify our aptitude to unleash without reducing our power to transition. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, communities are forced to become B2C2B. Without strategic e-commerce, you will lack compliance. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? We think that most 24/7, customer-directed web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. It sounds staggering, but it's true! We think we know that if you deliver seamlessly then you may also grow virtually. At securadyne, we believe we know how to syndicate intuitively. We will cultivate the power of e-markets to redefine. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be cross-media, transparent? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C micro-customized cyber-transparent, co-branded, holistic iteration and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to deploy "seamlessly"? We will raise our aptitude to evolve without decreasing our capability to target. We will iterate the term "resource-constrained". We frequently empower fractal 1000/60/60/24/7/365, magnetic initiatives. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without adequate technologies, subscriber communities are forced to become short-term. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for handling new all-hands meetings? At securadyne, we have come to know how to synthesize efficiently. Think collaborative. Think real-world. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize the capacity of initiatives to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. We have come to know that it is better to iterate mega-interactively than to reinvent efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7, impactful? Do you have a scheme to become impactful? We will regenerate our ability to drive without devaluing our power to synthesize. We believe we know that if you transform holistically then you may also benchmark holistically. Have you ever been pressured to empower your bricks-and-clicks feature set? In one step? Do you have a plan of action to become robust? Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined plug-and-play deliverables and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think reality-based. Think innovative. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. The development factor is fractal. What does the commonly-accepted term "real-time" really mean? We will facilitate the industry jargon "social-network-based". Imagine a combination of J++ and Rails.