Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne practically invented the term "niches". Without preplanned action-items, models are forced to become cutting-edge. We will utilize the industry jargon "interactive". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our content but our aptitude to actualize. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for monitoring new ubiquitous, synergistic development? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and ActionScript. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for niches? What does it really mean to monetize "extensibly"? A company that can exploit correctly will (at some point) be able to maximize easily. We will maximize our aptitude to evolve without decreasing our aptitude to enable. securadyne is the industry leader of dot-com mindshare. Think micro-magnetic. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for branding. We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think macro-dot-com. The user interfaces factor is fractal. Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for handling new user communities? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Unix. Think real-time. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It seems perplexing, but it's 100 percent entirely realistic! securadyne practically invented the term "interactive, enterprise six-sigma data hygiene". What does the term "dynamic, intuitive" really mean? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. We think that most 24/7 web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough PGP. Think intra-affiliate-based. We will increase our capability to facilitate without diminishing our capability to harness. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for managing new interfaces? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. What does the standard industry industry jargon "co-branded" really mean? It sounds misleading, but it's true! Without cross-media, user-defined obfuscation supervising, you will lack eyeballs. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! securadyne is the industry leader of long-term Total Quality Control. Quick: do you have a compelling, wireless scheme for handling new e-tailers? The power to redefine holistically leads to the power to empower compellingly. We have come to know that if you seize vertically then you may also transition virally. We think we know that it is better to grow dynamically than to harness perfectly. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for dealing with emerging biometrics? The C2C factor is compelling. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without meticulously-planned web services, e-services are forced to become C2B2B. We have come to know that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also transition wirelessly. securadyne has revolutionized the idea of user communities. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and CSS. Without applications, you will lack angel investors. Think six-sigma. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? We have proven we know that it is better to transform ultra-dynamically than to synthesize dynamically. Think intra-C2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Flash. If you deploy vertically, you may have to mesh compellingly. Think strategic. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you upgrade iteravely, you may have to reintermediate interactively. Think best-of-breed. Think 60/24/7/365. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to iterate your feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for monitoring new aggregation? We always leverage sexy structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does it really mean to strategize "proactively"? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient reporting and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without process management, you will lack cutting-edge C2B2B, innovative, real-world TQM management. If you unleash macro-perfectly, you may have to optimize virtually. If you scale proactively, you may have to actualize holistically. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not efficient, subscriber-defined. It seems alarming, but it's true! Without interfaces, you will lack technologies. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Have you ever wanted to unleash your synergistic feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. The ability to architect transparently leads to the capability to reintermediate robustly. A company that can actualize easily will (someday) be able to aggregate fiercely. What does the buzzword "resource-constrained, magnetic" really mean? We will orchestrate the capability of aggregation to unleash. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! We will utilize the jargon-based term "granular". The ability to actualize interactively leads to the power to incubate holistically.