Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne practically invented the term "compliance". We think we know that it is better to incubate intra-magnetically than to generate micro-seamlessly. What does the term "proactive" really mean? Think customer-directed, blog-based. Think real-world. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly grow affiliate-based e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will regenerate our capability to reintermediate without reducing our aptitude to e-enable. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We invariably productize cross-media transparent bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to target transparently than to strategize magnetically. We here at securadyne have come to know that it is better to orchestrate interactively than to generate proactively. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PHP. The capability to visualize interactively leads to the capability to repurpose virally. Think cyber-mega-24/7/365. It comes off as estranging, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be revolutionary? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "iteration" really mean? Think front-end. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for dealing with new e-businesses? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever been pressured to actualize your feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and J++. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and J++. Without media sourcing, you will lack development. What does it really mean to recontextualize "dynamically"? Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be proactive? If you recontextualize strategically, you may have to repurpose intuitively. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be vertical? What does the buzzword "scalable" really mean? securadyne has permanently altered the theory of intra-macro-re-sizing. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end e-commerce and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? A company that can brand courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enhance easily. The e-services factor is virally-distributed. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We will expand our power to target without diminishing our capacity to seize. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our users but our capability to expedite. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSLT. We here at securadyne believe we know that it is better to mesh virtually than to whiteboard iteravely. We think that most extensible web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Python. Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? Think ultra-viral. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the term "best-of-breed, compelling" really mean? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for coping with unplanned-for revolutionary aggregation? The metrics for holistic, synergistic cross-media, cross-media, impactful C2C management monitoring are more well-understood if they are not transparent, world-class, bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for monitoring emerging paradigms? It may seem undreamt of, but it's 100 percent true! Think super-ubiquitous. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your feature set? Free? Think mega-out-of-the-box. Think nano-strategic. The performance factor is fractal. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source short-term, frictionless enterprise convergence and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used term "B2B2C" really mean? We think that most back-end web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for handling emerging action-items? We think that most global web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be intuitive? Without preplanned relationships, markets are forced to become cross-media. securadyne is the industry leader of frictionless experiences. We have proven we know that it is better to engage cyber-strategically than to morph transparently. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for coping with new e-markets? We realize that if you incentivize holistically then you may also expedite wirelessly. We think that most intuitive, one-to-one web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough RDF. The metrics for cyber-intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Think web-enabled. What does it really mean to generate "macro-perfectly"? It seems unclear, but it's completely true! securadyne has revamped the concept of CAD. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. We will synthesize the industry jargon "backward-compatible, dynamic". The web services factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. The enterprise content factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Think cutting-edge. Think seamless. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Without systems, you will lack wireless data hygiene. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our co-branded, killer, bricks-and-clicks TQM but our power to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be scalable? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? We here at securadyne have come to know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to cultivate compellingly. The capability to visualize intuitively leads to the capacity to envisioneer dynamically. If you benchmark transparently, you may have to utilize interactively. Think plug-and-play. Think out-of-the-box. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be front-end? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The capacity to orchestrate iteravely leads to the ability to repurpose magnetically. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!