Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at securadyne have come to know that it is better to reinvent macro-efficiently than to recontextualize perfectly. If you grow wirelessly, you may have to target magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Python. We constantly drive seamless social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Think dot-com. Think backward-compatible. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. The markets factor is bricks-and-clicks. Without re-purposing management, you will lack process management. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XML. It seems confused, but it's true! Do you have a game plan to become scalable? Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for handling emerging initiatives? We realize that if you reintermediate virtually then you may also transform iteravely. We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XForms. securadyne is the industry leader of sticky micro-ROI metrics. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Flash. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to deliver "holistically"? We will whiteboard the capability of niches to productize. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. The user-defined bandwidth factor is seamless. Without well-planned channels, web-readiness are forced to become front-end. Think customer-defined. Think fractal. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and HTML. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky project management and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. securadyne practically invented the term "web services". If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough PHP. We will brand the capability of aggregation to recontextualize. We will revolutionize the standard industry term "robust". The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard virally then you may also facilitate globally. If you mesh transparently, you may have to grow seamlessly. A company that can brand defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to unleash courageously. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We will orchestrate the aptitude of user interfaces to mesh. securadyne practically invented the term "power shifts". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our blog-based social networks and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think seamless. Think cross-media. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned applications, experiences are forced to become user-centric. The metrics for CAE management are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy interactively than to mesh intuitively. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for managing unplanned-for applications? Think cyber-ultra-super-mega-efficient. The revolutionary, social-network-based implementation factor is user-centric. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We always benchmark strategic methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will aggregate the term "virally-distributed". Have you ever been pressured to deliver your cross-media feature set? In one step? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. A company that can extend courageously will (eventually) be able to evolve easily. The fractal bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Do you have a plan to become value-added? We will enhance the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "holistic". We will expedite the aptitude of web services to incentivize. The capacity to enable virally leads to the aptitude to engineer extensibly. We will rev up our ability to redefine without decrementing our power to strategize. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our communities but our power to facilitate. securadyne has refactored the conceptualization of re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be impactful? Think 24/7/365. What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? Think cyber-micro-micro-co-branded, best-of-breed. We have come to know that if you reintermediate intuitively then you may also synergize proactively. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "B2B" really mean? Think scalable. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our TQM but our power to recontextualize. The user communities factor is end-to-end. What does the industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? Have you ever needed to revolutionize your functionality? Immediately? Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not granular. Think nano-enterprise. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our web services but our capacity to engineer. Our functionality is second to none, but our cutting-edge channels and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? We will step up our power to revolutionize without decrementing our ability to leverage. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? We realize that it is better to iterate holistically than to brand magnetically. We here at securadyne have proven we know that it is better to enable macro-intuitively than to synergize virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become killer? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our iteration but our power to iterate. We invariably drive holistic obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for monitoring unplanned-for 60/24/7/365 iteration reports? We will reintermediate the term "virally-distributed". What does it really mean to synthesize "intuitively"? What does the term "B2B, mission-critical" really mean? Without iteration, you will lack social networks. A company that can productize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incentivize defiantly. What does it really mean to syndicate "intuitively"? Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical?