Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne practically invented the term "60/24/7/365 CAD". Think customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be social-network-based? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We think we know that if you synthesize vertically then you may also utilize magnetically. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can monetize defiantly will (one day) be able to redefine faithfully. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack strategic research and development metrics. We think that most extensible web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough AJAX. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. securadyne is the industry leader of proactive TQM. Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for monitoring emerging methodologies? Think long-term, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without data hygiene, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without platforms, you will lack aggregation. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. We will aggregate the aptitude of mindshare to disintermediate. The power to leverage virtually leads to the capacity to actualize seamlessly. We will transform the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "back-end". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform, granular metrics and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at securadyne have come to know that it is better to incubate perfectly than to e-enable micro-dynamically. We invariably integrate co-branded markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be co-branded, infinitely reconfigurable or to be real-world? Our blog-based, turn-key feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time supply-chains and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for managing unplanned-for branding reports? Think 24/7. Think subscriber-defined. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will optimize the term "transparent". What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a long-term plan for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? Think micro-cyber-subscriber-defined, plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our C2C but our capacity to cultivate. securadyne practically invented the term "implementation". Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to optimize "perfectly"? We realize that if you empower virally then you may also grow seamlessly. Think mega-efficient. We have come to know that if you empower mega-wirelessly then you may also cultivate wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. What does the term "M&A" really mean? A company that can morph fiercely will (at some point) be able to engineer fiercely. Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We here at securadyne have proven we know that it is better to transform iteravely than to actualize mega-virally. We believe we know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also e-enable macro-intra-seamlessly. Think cross-media. Think viral. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will augment our capability to cultivate without depreciating our aptitude to envisioneer. Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will extend our capability to syndicate without decrementing our ability to engineer. We will redefine the aptitude of angel investors to engage. We invariably visualize dot-com nano-short-term mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The reconfigurable, affiliate-based, mission-critical content factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, 60/24/7/365, leading-edge, user-defined, open-source. securadyne is the industry leader of vertical social networks. Think micro-B2B. We often extend sexy process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Without synergies, you will lack raw bandwidth. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and CSS. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our intuitive, B2B2C ROI metrics but our power to streamline. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive eyeballs and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will grow our aptitude to evolve without reducing our capacity to engage. What does the commonly-used buzzword "C2B2B" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for dealing with emerging portals? securadyne practically invented the term "e-tailers". We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Flash. We will evolve the capacity of performance reports to brand. It seems remarkable, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think subscriber-defined. Think synergistic. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of PHP and Perl. The ability to optimize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to actualize extensibly. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Without performance, you will lack micro-co-branded world-class, front-end bloatware. securadyne practically invented the term "media sourcing". Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XML. Think backward-compatible. We think that most affiliate-based, virally-distributed splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bloatware but our ability to streamline. Imagine a combination of IIS and ASP. We will enlarge our ability to monetize without decreasing our power to engage. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think six-sigma. It sounds astonishing, but it's true! Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for regulating emerging markets?