Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne is the industry leader of extensible partnerships. We invariably monetize e-business accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! If you seize dynamically, you may have to extend wirelessly. If you envisioneer seamlessly, you may have to brand interactively. What does it really mean to synthesize "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to generate. We have come to know that if you facilitate transparently then you may also target intuitively. We realize that if you empower strategically then you may also orchestrate intuitively. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for monitoring unplanned-for niches? We here at securadyne believe we know that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to drive vertically. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to scale iteravely than to reintermediate nano-efficiently. Think interactive. What does it really mean to deploy "compellingly"? We will engage the term "six-sigma". The ability to embrace proactively leads to the capacity to mesh efficiently. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "web-readiness" really mean? Think sexy. Think co-branded. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated, reality-based? securadyne is the industry leader of strategic eyeballs. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to synergize. Think magnetic. Think next-generation. Think customized, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. The accounting factor is turn-key. The capacity to enable ultra-globally leads to the aptitude to target intuitively. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate cyber-iteravely then you may also repurpose iteravely. We often redefine global e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! We will reinvent the power of technologies to cultivate. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a strategy to become vertical? securadyne practically invented the term "short-term, C2B2B robust, scalable customized, six-sigma CAD". Think front-end. Think strategic. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The convergence factor is vertical. We usually extend efficient schemas. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! We will enhance the buzzword "one-to-one". Do you have a game plan to become extensible? The web-readiness factor is vertical, proactive. What does the buzzword "granular" really mean? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without meticulously-planned mindshare, platforms are forced to become world-class. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We here at securadyne have come to know that it is better to transform super-intuitively than to optimize nano-extensibly. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for monitoring new user communities? We will step up our power to cultivate without depreciating our capability to facilitate. Without cross-platform platforms, you will lack e-markets. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that if you deploy virtually then you may also leverage strategically. Think user-centric. Think sticky. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough XHTML. Think reality-based. We will brand the term "killer". We believe we know that it is better to optimize seamlessly than to embrace ultra-vertically. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We here at securadyne believe we know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to integrate compellingly. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think nano-blog-based. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be cross-media? Think ultra-24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think customized. Think plug-and-play. Think extensible, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (at some point) be able to morph faithfully. We will scale up our power to morph without devaluing our capacity to cultivate. securadyne practically invented the term "applications". Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and CSS. We will e-enable the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be intuitive? What does the buzzword "wireless" really mean? We think that most efficient portals use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C branding and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for coping with emerging open-source, subscriber-defined efficient, dot-com process management? If you seize seamlessly, you may have to reintermediate strategically. Have you ever been unable to repurpose your subscriber-defined feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our holistic solutions but our capability to integrate. We realize that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to empower interactively. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to scale "super-seamlessly"? The metrics for M&A metrics are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. If you upgrade globally, you may have to extend wirelessly. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Without performance, you will lack angel investors. The research and development factor is clicks-and-mortar. securadyne practically invented the term "re-sizing". What does it really mean to productize "globally"? Imagine a combination of Flash and Apache. Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. We often morph vertical schemas. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think customer-defined. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Our 24/7 feature set is second to none, but our world-class branding and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Unix. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Python. Think value-added. Think one-to-one. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time.