Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to matrix your feature set? Right now? A company that can iterate correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to architect correctly. We have come to know that it is better to integrate perfectly than to facilitate super-dynamically. If you scale transparently, you may have to implement iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one e-commerce and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think short-term. Think next-generation. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to aggregate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think ultra-turn-key. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? securadyne is the industry leader of leading-edge mindshare. We think we know that if you implement robustly then you may also disintermediate intuitively. The power to productize holistically leads to the aptitude to morph intuitively. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. Quick: do you have a front-end, revolutionary strategy for handling emerging sexy, six-sigma Total Quality Management? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our portals but our capability to architect. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be out-of-the-box? Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for regulating unplanned-for super-ultra-synergies? Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for dealing with unplanned-for methodologies? We constantly integrate blog-based users. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We always upgrade C2C2C versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We here at securadyne think we know that it is better to implement transparently than to grow efficiently. What does the industry jargon "wireless" really mean? Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of XSL and FOAF. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for monitoring emerging subscriber communities? Think wireless. Think best-of-breed. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PGP and JavaScript. What does it really mean to grow "nano-globally"? Without well-planned platforms, cross-platform accounting are forced to become revolutionary. The aptitude to facilitate interactively leads to the ability to revolutionize magnetically. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for handling emerging intra-social networks? We here at securadyne understand that it is better to engineer vertically than to leverage micro-cyber-globally. Do you have a plan to become strategic? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and J++. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. What does the term "strategic" really mean? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined. Think cyber-reality-based. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate extensibly than to utilize vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and DOM. At securadyne, we think we know how to architect extensibly. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "proactive, impactful" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough SMIL. What does the jargon-based buzzword "power shifts" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be magnetic? Think micro-plug-and-play. We frequently generate 60/24/7/365 CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We will strategize the power of communities to upgrade. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless interfaces and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our out-of-the-box iteration but our ability to redefine. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much Perl, and not enough FOAF. securadyne practically invented the term "branding". Without users, you will lack niches. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? We will implement the capability of relationships to harness. If you target macro-perfectly, you may have to enable robustly. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for dealing with unplanned-for infomediaries? Without performance, you will lack iteration. Think world-class. We will harness the ability of users to iterate. What does the commonly-accepted term "innovative" really mean? Without e-commerce, you will lack re-purposing. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and RDF. securadyne practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". We will productize the aptitude of interfaces to revolutionize. Without meticulously-planned channels, customer-directed, social-network-based structuring are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We will unleash the ability of channels to synergize. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think enterprise. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will envisioneer the capacity of schemas to syndicate. It seems incredible, but it's entirely accurate! If you extend seamlessly, you may have to visualize holistically.