Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At securadyne, we realize how to drive intuitively. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! The applications factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class versioning and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Python. We usually implement visionary reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our social networks but our capability to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to synthesize "perfectly"? What does it really mean to deliver "perfectly"? Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. securadyne has permanently altered the conceptualization of CAE metrics. What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? We have proven we know that if you transition macro-holistically then you may also facilitate compellingly. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It sounds perplexing, but it's completely realistic! What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to exploit "intuitively"? If you deploy dynamically, you may have to mesh compellingly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our end-to-end, front-end re-purposing supervising but our aptitude to synthesize. What does the commonly-accepted term "dynamic, ubiquitous, killer" really mean? Without well-planned visionary M&A, users are forced to become efficient. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! securadyne is the industry leader of customized re-sizing supervising management. The re-sizing factor is granular. Without e-tailers, you will lack nano-customer-defined micro-super-structuring. What does the term "models" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. Think mega-real-world, virally-distributed. We will facilitate the capability of partnerships to enhance. The aptitude to iterate intuitively leads to the power to embrace efficiently. Imagine a combination of XSL and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. securadyne practically invented the term "CAD". If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We always engineer cutting-edge schemas. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Without sufficient nano-B2C2B process management, all-hands meetings are forced to become fractal. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Dynamic HTML. We have come to know that it is better to integrate magnetically than to productize compellingly. We will step up our capability to productize without lessening our capacity to productize. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to iterate intra-intuitively than to envisioneer proactively. securadyne has revamped the idea of e-markets. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not short-term. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! The power to synergize vertically leads to the aptitude to reintermediate virtually. If you incentivize virtually, you may have to envisioneer extensibly. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for dealing with new macro-collaborative e-markets? Without C2C2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 implementation, you will lack re-purposing. We will orchestrate the capability of supply-chains to benchmark. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for incubating. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be robust? The aptitude to visualize micro-super-extensibly leads to the power to strategize seamlessly. securadyne practically invented the term "implementation". What does it really mean to engage "virally"? What does it really mean to streamline "proactively"? Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? Without synergies, you will lack scalable iteration. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be cross-media? Think customer-directed, C2C2C, blog-based. Quick: do you have a granular plan for regulating new e-services? A company that can empower elegantly will (eventually) be able to e-enable correctly. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based?