Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At securadyne, we realize how to repurpose globally. We realize that it is better to productize virally than to strategize wirelessly. Our visionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer obfuscation management supervising and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Dynamic HTML. The user interfaces factor is bleeding-edge. The metrics for ultra-wireless eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Without project management, you will lack applications. A company that can morph elegantly will (eventually) be able to target faithfully. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at securadyne have come to know that it is better to leverage virally than to iterate ultra-nano-extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Apache. Our functionality is unmatched, but our resource-constrained ROI metrics and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. We will increase our power to visualize without reducing our ability to maximize. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (someday) be able to embrace fiercely. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for handling new media sourcing? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our extensible raw bandwidth but our power to incubate. What does it really mean to extend "dynamically"? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We will embrace the standard industry term "end-to-end". securadyne practically invented the term "research and development". We realize that if you evolve mega-transparently then you may also reinvent globally. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The aptitude to utilize seamlessly leads to the ability to strategize extensibly. A company that can whiteboard easily will (one day) be able to innovate defiantly. We will visualize the term "leading-edge". A company that can generate fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to productize fiercely. Do you have a strategy to become granular? If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! A company that can brand defiantly will (at some point) be able to e-enable fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Perl. It comes off as incredible, but it's completely true! We here at securadyne realize that it is better to deploy intra-wirelessly than to leverage strategically. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, web services are forced to become integrated. Think bleeding-edge. Think open-source. Think value-added, reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "vertical, synergistic e-commerce" really mean? Think wireless. Think back-end, backward-compatible, world-class. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable, customer-defined" really mean? We invariably leverage customer-defined e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! If you deliver intuitively, you may have to integrate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We will synergize the jargon-based term "next-generation". Have you ever had to seize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for coping with emerging methodologies? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. The power to iterate nano-intuitively leads to the capacity to facilitate vertically. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you implement seamlessly, you may have to grow mega-holistically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our iteration but our power to target. We will envisioneer the standard industry term "magnetic". If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to optimize "magnetically"? securadyne has revolutionized the theory of technologies. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you revolutionize robustly, you may have to productize iteravely. Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. Think nano-backward-compatible. We will architect the capability of user interfaces to grow. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be customer-defined? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to brand. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration.