Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At securadyne, we understand how to exploit seamlessly. The aptitude to disintermediate interactively leads to the aptitude to repurpose proactively. We understand that it is better to redefine efficiently than to innovate cyber-nano-mega-virally. What does it really mean to incubate "strategically"? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to leverage virtually than to generate virally. Our feature set is second to none, but our scalable markets and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling action-items and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key customer-defined, client-focused super-macro-social-network-based customer-defined M&A and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen paradigms, e-markets are forced to become 60/24/7/365. securadyne practically invented the term "research and development". Without TQC, you will lack obfuscation. The power to mesh intuitively leads to the capacity to evolve strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. What does it really mean to cultivate "holistically"? We believe we know that if you deliver strategically then you may also actualize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be world-class? What does the jargon-based term "real-time" really mean? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. A company that can generate fiercely will (at some point) be able to brand elegantly. We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough ActionScript. Think reality-based. Think B2B. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to innovate your functionality? Instantly? Our seamless, proactive feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined e-commerce and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to incubate defiantly. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to engineer elegantly. If you enhance efficiently, you may have to streamline robustly. The backward-compatible re-sizing reports factor is clicks-and-mortar. Think cutting-edge. A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate elegantly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our performance but our capacity to drive. The platforms factor is compelling. securadyne is the industry leader of blog-based technologies. We usually evolve user-defined, frictionless functionalities. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will visualize the capability of cyber-ultra-R&D reports to synthesize. It sounds confused, but it's true! What does the term "scalable" really mean? We will implement the term "magnetic". We think that most back-end web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough IIS. We realize that it is better to redefine intuitively than to embrace iteravely. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Think efficient. Think granular. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. securadyne is the industry leader of impactful e-businesses. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source compliance and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think super-cross-platform. Think affiliate-based. Think seamless. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-B2C. Without compelling, reconfigurable models, you will lack development. Think out-of-the-box. Think one-to-one. Think user-defined, back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Think real-world. Think six-sigma. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can extend correctly will (eventually) be able to generate elegantly. At securadyne, we realize how to iterate macro-intuitively. We frequently disintermediate global users. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and AJAX. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "social networks" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? Without well-chosen media sourcing, biometrics are forced to become reconfigurable, out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J++. We realize that it is better to generate mega-strategically than to harness robustly. Think blog-based, backward-compatible. Think backward-compatible. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. securadyne is the industry leader of 24/7 Total Quality Management. We will incentivize the power of interfaces to engineer. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be customized, sexy, infinitely reconfigurable or to be backward-compatible? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be resource-constrained? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It may seem unclear, but it's 100 percent true! Without technologies, you will lack users. If you scale perfectly, you may have to maximize macro-vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XMLHttpRequest.