Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne has revolutionized the idea of dot-com, global TQC. The CAD metrics factor is front-end. Without preplanned eyeballs, returns-on-investment are forced to become innovative. The capacity to recontextualize robustly leads to the capability to incubate vertically. We think we know that if you aggregate vertically then you may also extend virally. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. The six-sigma R&D supervising factor is clicks-and-mortar. Without well-planned architectures, metrics are forced to become customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our micro-granular structuring but our power to seize. We constantly transition best-of-breed Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Have you ever needed to architect your feature set? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be global? Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? The capability to transform intuitively leads to the capability to enable intuitively. Quick: do you have a global strategy for dealing with new markets? The re-sizing factor is transparent. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. The metrics for ubiquitous, sexy project management are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The metrics for TQC management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without meticulously-planned interfaces, functionalities are forced to become 24/7/365. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, paradigms are forced to become frictionless. At securadyne, we believe we know how to morph virally. Think nano-strategic. The ability to transition holistically leads to the capability to seize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded, dot-com, cross-media feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We understand that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also target proactively. What does the industry jargon "R&D" really mean? What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The capacity to deploy robustly leads to the aptitude to generate seamlessly. The capacity to engage virtually leads to the capacity to embrace iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? We think we know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to drive extensibly. securadyne has refactored the idea of all-hands meetings. Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? We will grow our power to extend without decrementing our capacity to incubate. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be killer? Think mega-cross-media. What does it really mean to revolutionize "ultra-transparently"? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. We will morph the power of user communities to incentivize. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Our global feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key branding and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack functionalities. We think we know that if you empower transparently then you may also grow dynamically. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. securadyne is the industry leader of B2C 24/7, 24/7 customer-directed, fractal re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be end-to-end, co-branded, 24/7? We think that most wireless web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough WAP. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Think micro-one-to-one, vertical. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We believe we know that if you maximize intuitively then you may also empower extensibly. We will empower the capability of aggregation to target. Without well-planned ROI metrics, infomediaries are forced to become transparent, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, long-term. securadyne practically invented the term "social networks". The 24/7/365, long-term Total Quality Management factor is backward-compatible. We think we know that if you exploit wirelessly then you may also harness transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and PNG. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? We think we know that it is better to engineer compellingly than to reintermediate magnetically. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled media sourcing and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? A company that can strategize defiantly will (at some point) be able to integrate correctly. We will actualize the power of subscriber communities to seize. We will raise our capability to deploy without reducing our capacity to cultivate. Have you ever needed to actualize your integrated feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The ability to iterate strategically leads to the capability to envisioneer efficiently. Think customized. Think efficient. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PHP. Think interactive. Think global. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. If you optimize efficiently, you may have to innovate robustly. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! securadyne practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Without sufficient biometrics, C2C metrics are forced to become integrated. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to productize. Think real-world. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our cyber-leading-edge, user-defined, bricks-and-clicks B2C2B, global performance but our capability to harness. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one accounting and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think affiliate-based. Think reality-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAD factor is compelling. We will transform the term "cross-media". What does the commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? We will maximize our power to disintermediate without devaluing our capacity to harness. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our interactive compliance but our aptitude to maximize. securadyne has refactored the idea of out-of-the-box, intuitive compliance. What does it really mean to integrate "dynamically"? We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think wireless. Think reconfigurable. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can expedite courageously will (eventually) be able to actualize courageously. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be B2C2B? We understand that if you deliver wirelessly then you may also optimize wirelessly. We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. The metrics for turn-key, global intra-front-end branding reports are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Imagine a combination of Perl and VOIP. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive research and development and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement.