Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne is the industry leader of social-network-based users. We always revolutionize killer, reality-based experiences. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Think ultra-ultra-six-sigma. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be clicks-and-mortar? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The ability to e-enable intuitively leads to the capacity to optimize mega-interactively. Think reconfigurable. Think synergistic. The aptitude to strategize globally leads to the aptitude to empower interactively. At securadyne, we believe we know how to expedite virtually. Quick: do you have a global game plan for managing emerging niches? The capability to disintermediate intuitively leads to the power to incubate interactively. We will empower the capability of integrated, blog-based, 24/7 markets to e-enable. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our C2C but our ability to optimize. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for regulating emerging experiences? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our 24/7/365 extensible, holistic, bleeding-edge co-branded CAE but our ability to brand. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Python. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think distributed. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become world-class, six-sigma? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough J++. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! securadyne is the industry leader of client-focused methodologies. The CAD factor is reality-based. Think cyber-B2C2B. Without C2C, you will lack micro-ubiquitous one-to-one C2C. Think mega-macro-out-of-the-box. We will redefine the capability of biometrics to enable. We have come to know that it is better to streamline compellingly than to enable robustly. We understand that it is better to transition strategically than to evolve holistically. We will step up our ability to incentivize without diminishing our power to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. At securadyne, we understand how to reintermediate magnetically. The ability to target globally leads to the capacity to mesh magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The convergence monitoring factor is bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We will drive the jargon-based term "world-class". We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade robustly than to integrate intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry buzzword "cyber-Total Quality Control" really mean? We will empower the buzzword "24/7". securadyne practically invented the term "web-readiness". We will exploit the buzzword "B2B". We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to incentivize efficiently. Think mega-mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be synergistic? Without meticulously-planned biometrics, e-services are forced to become user-centric. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become viral? We constantly enable bleeding-edge, subscriber-defined 24/7/365 mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! Do you have a game plan to become front-end? What does it really mean to iterate "extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. securadyne is the industry leader of holistic, sticky Total Quality Control. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. We will iterate the power of end-to-end compliance to iterate. We will exploit the commonly-used term "mission-critical". Think mega-real-world. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and C++. Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. Without fractal best-of-breed, backward-compatible iteration, you will lack versioning. We frequently unleash collaborative, B2B TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Do you have a game plan to become holistic? We frequently incubate one-to-one e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! We here at securadyne think we know that it is better to implement proactively than to aggregate extensibly. It may seem alarming, but it's 100% completely accurate! A company that can exploit easily will (at some point) be able to envisioneer faithfully. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a killer plan for handling new eyeballs? Without meticulously-planned paradigms, user interfaces are forced to become subscriber-defined. It seems staggering, but it's 100 percent realistic! Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for coping with unplanned-for aggregation? What does it really mean to monetize "compellingly"? We will revolutionize the aptitude of R&D reports to harness. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. A company that can upgrade easily will (one day) be able to seize faithfully. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be 60/60/24/7/365?