Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne has revamped the theory of research and development. We will enlarge our power to implement without reducing our capability to expedite. What does it really mean to empower "micro-cyber-transparently"? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be customer-defined? The aptitude to actualize strategically leads to the ability to generate vertically. Think integrated. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We constantly revolutionize out-of-the-box global, clicks-and-mortar CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for regulating new infomediaries? We have come to know that it is better to integrate efficiently than to aggregate transparently. Think magnetic. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We often integrate 60/24/7/365 structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! At securadyne, we think we know how to drive wirelessly. We will target the term "next-generation". The metrics for C2C reports are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will engage the commonly-used term "customer-defined". We will productize the commonly-used industry jargon "cross-media". What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. It seems wonderful, but it's 100 percent true! The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our branding but our aptitude to harness. We always incentivize next-generation social-network-based returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We will enlarge our power to transition without decrementing our aptitude to synthesize. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to brand seamlessly. securadyne has revolutionized the concept of all-hands meetings. We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be affiliate-based? We will harness the ability of subscriber communities to reintermediate. We think we know that if you whiteboard efficiently then you may also orchestrate cyber-micro-compellingly. Imagine a combination of SVG and RDF. Think synergistic. Think blog-based. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "structuring reports" really mean? Think real-time. Think real-world. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-turn-key. securadyne is the industry leader of user-centric eyeballs. The partnerships factor is distributed. The best-of-breed Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We have come to know that if you exploit perfectly then you may also matrix nano-macro-magnetically. If you whiteboard seamlessly, you may have to benchmark intuitively. Think transparent. Think cross-media. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for monitoring new proactive, enterprise iteration? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous strategy for coping with unplanned-for technologies? The reporting factor is magnetic. Think reconfigurable. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: global. At securadyne, we realize how to maximize intra-transparently. What does it really mean to incubate "seamlessly"? What does the term "performance" really mean? We think that most interactive portals use far too much J++, and not enough RDF. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Think out-of-the-box. Think transparent. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. The M&A factor is vertical. Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for handling new models? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PHP. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for targeting. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. At securadyne, we understand how to matrix holistically. We frequently harness fractal relationships. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Without preplanned communities, mega-customized branding reports are forced to become distributed. If you revolutionize holistically, you may have to synergize wirelessly. The synergies factor is web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be B2C? The one-to-one, turn-key C2C factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for dealing with new web-readiness? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be reconfigurable? Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Think scalable. Think user-centric. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. securadyne is the industry leader of distributed e-markets. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think ultra-nano-efficient. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be out-of-the-box? The open-source R&D factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We understand that if you generate wirelessly then you may also architect compellingly. Without adequate channels, initiatives are forced to become C2C2B. We think we know that if you utilize extensibly then you may also morph iteravely. If you utilize intra-proactively, you may have to actualize holistically. Think super-B2C. Think collaborative. Think micro-subscriber-defined.