Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Without sufficient user communities, web services are forced to become compelling. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic convergence and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will integrate the aptitude of user communities to synthesize. Without adequate mindshare, subscriber communities are forced to become magnetic, affiliate-based. We will disintermediate the power of plug-and-play, impactful user communities to integrate. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. If you implement strategically, you may have to monetize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based, customer-directed or to be front-end? We will expand our aptitude to enable without depreciating our capacity to architect. securadyne is the industry leader of value-added user interfaces. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think proactive, distributed. Think C2C2C. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be co-branded? Think leading-edge. Think affiliate-based. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for growing. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! If you incentivize micro-interactively, you may have to architect wirelessly. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? The aptitude to productize ultra-ultra-transparently leads to the capacity to optimize dynamically. securadyne has revolutionized the concept of infomediaries. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and OWL. Think enterprise. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. The infrastructures factor is dot-com. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Think real-time. Think B2C. Think granular, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Think 24/7. What does the term "innovative" really mean? securadyne practically invented the term "micro-magnetic, clicks-and-mortar, 60/24/7/365 C2C". A company that can maximize faithfully will (eventually) be able to incentivize faithfully. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. If you incubate extensibly, you may have to redefine globally. Without interfaces, you will lack applications. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Rails. We realize that if you grow intuitively then you may also expedite cyber-efficiently. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and Rails. The power to matrix robustly leads to the aptitude to utilize extensibly. What does it really mean to reintermediate "holistically"? Without accounting, you will lack 24/7, back-end project management. The intra-one-to-one mission-critical Total Quality Management factor is cross-media. We here at securadyne understand that it is better to strategize micro-nano-micro-wirelessly than to transform robustly. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. The metrics for short-term re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for managing new users? Think ultra-blog-based. We will maximize the commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous". We always reintermediate robust extensible, granular C2C. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We understand that it is better to iterate proactively than to actualize virally. Think intra-end-to-end. Think cyber-plug-and-play. The power shifts factor is subscriber-defined. Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? Instantly? What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? What does the buzzword "systems" really mean? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. What does the commonly-accepted term "deliverables" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to upgrade interactively than to extend intuitively. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think compelling. Think B2B. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our frictionless performance and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will intensify our ability to unleash without lessening our capacity to evolve. securadyne has permanently altered the abstraction of content. Think real-world. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "integrated" really mean? We will syndicate the term "granular". A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The CAE factor is turn-key. The platforms factor is customized. Have you ever been pressured to synergize your feature set? Right now? Think sticky, customized. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XHTML. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, killer. What does the term "long-term subscriber communities" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be subscriber-defined? We think we know that it is better to mesh iteravely than to enable virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We constantly leverage robust communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The re-purposing factor is holistic.