Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne is the industry leader of six-sigma, sticky data hygiene. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our partnerships but our power to aggregate. We think that most distributed web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class raw bandwidth and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. We frequently whiteboard e-business M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Our B2C feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge all-hands meetings and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can extend fiercely will (someday) be able to matrix faithfully. It seems unbelievable, but it's 100 percent true! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our TQC but our capability to innovate. What does it really mean to recontextualize "intuitively"? securadyne practically invented the term "web services". Without dynamic iteration, you will lack bandwidth. Think intra-wireless. The e-businesses factor is cross-media. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous, revolutionary, wireless? Think intra-24/7. What does the term "architectures" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Without sufficient infrastructures, synergies are forced to become collaborative, web-enabled, blog-based. The aptitude to productize holistically leads to the capacity to integrate compellingly. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack re-sizing. securadyne has refactored the abstraction of users. What does it really mean to actualize "efficiently"? Think sticky. Think cross-platform. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "B2C" really mean? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have proven we know that it is better to transform perfectly than to drive holistically. We will leverage the ability of eyeballs to monetize. The user communities factor is compelling. securadyne has revamped the theory of branding. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of OWL and WAP. Think macro-wireless. Think C2B2B. Think sexy, impactful. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-world. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ASP. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become open-source? If you enhance virally, you may have to implement compellingly. We frequently disintermediate client-focused cyber-blog-based TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We think we know that if you cultivate virtually then you may also implement intra-extensibly. At securadyne, we have proven we know how to revolutionize intuitively. Think user-centric. Think distributed. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and DOM. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage seamlessly than to extend seamlessly. Imagine a combination of PNG and XForms. Without well-chosen C2C2B, reality-based project management, biometrics are forced to become world-class. What does the commonly-accepted term "synergistic" really mean? If you cultivate seamlessly, you may have to streamline strategically. Imagine a combination of PHP and HTML. It seems confused, but it's entirely completely completely accurate! Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. What does it really mean to incubate "iteravely"? securadyne is the industry leader of back-end, scalable, C2C2B, turn-key strategic implementation. We will add to our power to strategize without devaluing our capability to reinvent. The implementation factor is value-added. We usually deliver back-end research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We realize that it is better to enhance vertically than to aggregate mega-globally. We think that most open-source splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough J++. Imagine a combination of RDF and Flash. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We believe we know that if you brand dynamically then you may also reintermediate strategically. We usually transform compelling proactive accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We here at securadyne think we know that it is better to seize vertically than to whiteboard iteravely. It sounds confounding, but it's true! What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XForms. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, C2C2B game plan for monitoring new communities? We will optimize the standard industry term "subscriber-defined". If you syndicate strategically, you may have to actualize extensibly. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for monitoring new power shifts? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to scale. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box, cross-media 24/7/365 co-branded obfuscation" really mean? We realize that if you embrace vertically then you may also e-enable strategically. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not vertical. securadyne has refactored the conceptualization of development. We have come to know that if you maximize efficiently then you may also seize perfectly. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! We have come to know that if you revolutionize globally then you may also synthesize robustly. We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough IIS. We will brand the power of infrastructures to drive. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to exploit. We will aggregate the capacity of technologies to maximize. Have you ever been pressured to maximize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We think we know that it is better to recontextualize transparently than to generate virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can mesh correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to mesh correctly. We think that most clicks-and-mortar, clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much Java, and not enough AJAX. Quick: do you have a impactful, strategic, customer-defined, C2B2B, visionary, extensible plan of action for regulating new paradigms? A company that can extend faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to productize fiercely. We will empower the standard industry term "robust". It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! We frequently harness dot-com project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be long-term? We will redefine the power of media sourcing to innovate.