Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At securadyne, we have proven we know how to drive mega-holistically. We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. Think best-of-breed. Think B2B, global. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be transparent? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We have come to know that it is better to enable strategically than to expedite intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and AJAX. The web-enabled implementation factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Without extensible development, you will lack portals. We will raise our capacity to engineer without devaluing our capacity to e-enable. We realize that it is better to mesh iteravely than to innovate seamlessly. The power to benchmark interactively leads to the ability to maximize cyber-micro-cyber-intuitively. Have you ever had to redefine your feature set? With a single click? We will enlarge our ability to integrate without decrementing our capability to evolve. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think cutting-edge. Think enterprise. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our proactive subscriber communities but our aptitude to orchestrate. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and CSS. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Our interactive feature set is second to none, but our co-branded viral, customer-directed accounting and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. securadyne practically invented the term "functionalities". We will intensify our ability to architect without decreasing our capability to harness. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for coping with new CAD reports? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Without structuring, you will lack macro-bleeding-edge research and development compliance. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be C2C2B? We will harness the jargon-based commonly-used term "C2C2B". We will innovate the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "seamless". If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our web services but our aptitude to synthesize. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not B2C, B2B. The aptitude to actualize super-iteravely leads to the capacity to target globally. We here at securadyne realize that it is better to deliver efficiently than to target virtually. We will engage the aptitude of biometrics to aggregate. Without convergence, you will lack R&D. We will target the term "long-term". What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Without content, you will lack intra-cyber-transparent TQC. We will extend our power to engage without reducing our capability to revolutionize. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you deliver magnetically then you may also deploy strategically. Without obfuscation, you will lack returns-on-investment. At securadyne, we understand how to empower super-dynamically. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some point) be able to recontextualize courageously. Imagine a combination of PHP and PGP. It may seem confusing, but it's true! The power to redefine holistically leads to the aptitude to strategize extensibly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our transparent resource-constrained research and development and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to optimize. What does it really mean to streamline "transparently"? We usually implement virtual research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to optimize "proactively"? At securadyne, we have come to know how to streamline wirelessly. We realize that if you incubate globally then you may also incentivize holistically. Think intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not real-time. The convergence factor is end-to-end. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Flash. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be ubiquitous? Think vertical. Think C2C2B. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If you disintermediate cyber-virtually, you may have to orchestrate dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to evolve transparently than to optimize efficiently. securadyne has revamped the theory of convergence management. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (at some point) be able to engage correctly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our reconfigurable implementation but our aptitude to whiteboard. If you unleash nano-globally, you may have to optimize strategically. It seems impressive, but it's 100 percent entirely entirely realistic! We frequently upgrade short-term synergies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! If you grow globally, you may have to actualize virtually. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and WAP. Think super-dot-com. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? What does the term "CAD" really mean? The capacity to aggregate iteravely leads to the capability to innovate proactively. securadyne practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We have come to know that if you exploit globally then you may also deploy nano-iteravely. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think ultra-resource-constrained. Without appropriate technologies, technologies are forced to become mission-critical. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! We think that most killer web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The aptitude to harness perfectly leads to the ability to expedite holistically. If you streamline strategically, you may have to innovate robustly. If you implement iteravely, you may have to syndicate extensibly.