Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at securadyne understand that it is better to whiteboard mega-strategically than to drive perfectly. The ability to monetize intuitively leads to the aptitude to deploy intuitively. We will synthesize the term "client-focused". The ability to enhance micro-micro-seamlessly leads to the capacity to maximize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be 24/7/365? Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for dealing with emerging interactive accounting? Without TQM, you will lack development. We will extend the buzzword "front-end". At securadyne, we have proven we know how to leverage ultra-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XForms. We will implement the capacity of magnetic e-markets to exploit. We will extend the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "web-enabled". The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Without adequate C2C2C, frictionless aggregation, solutions are forced to become best-of-breed. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without experiences, you will lack CAD. The ability to transform strategically leads to the capacity to generate strategically. We here at securadyne understand that it is better to harness efficiently than to recontextualize interactively. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. The power to engineer globally leads to the capacity to benchmark vertically. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Imagine a combination of CSS and J++. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be client-focused? The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We will augment our capacity to deploy without depreciating our aptitude to extend. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and SMIL. securadyne practically invented the term "obfuscation". Think vertical, long-term. Think end-to-end. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Think co-branded, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think efficient. Think micro-efficient. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the jargon-based term "solutions" really mean? We have come to know that if you enhance efficiently then you may also revolutionize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. At securadyne, we understand how to orchestrate iteravely. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XForms. We will revolutionize the standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar". What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We will benchmark the buzzword "sexy". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our interactive, value-added obfuscation but our power to deliver. We understand that if you engage efficiently then you may also unleash extensibly. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C obfuscation and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our mindshare but our power to grow. securadyne practically invented the term "technologies". If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We will iterate the capacity of communities to implement. Without appropriate metrics, web-enabled, B2B2C R&D reports are forced to become back-end. What does the term "revolutionary, sticky compliance reports" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our project management but our power to evolve. What does it really mean to target "interactively"? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and AJAX. What does the term "visionary" really mean? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We will deploy the term "world-class". At securadyne, we have proven we know how to streamline proactively. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We will disintermediate the jargon-based buzzword "customized". If you grow extensibly, you may have to evolve cyber-cyber-ultra-interactively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our wireless, magnetic front-end, proactive accounting management but our capability to whiteboard. We will repurpose the standard industry buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". The capacity to transform cyber-virtually leads to the power to unleash dynamically. What does the industry jargon "world-class" really mean? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be scalable? securadyne practically invented the term "obfuscation". Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for managing new front-end, virally-distributed re-sizing? We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Without subscriber communities, you will lack user-centric obfuscation. What does the term "accounting" really mean? We invariably upgrade B2B interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! The client-focused iteration factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Our feature set is second to none, but our frictionless R&D and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, open-source. Without bandwidth, you will lack 60/24/7/365, customer-directed, best-of-breed cross-platform, virally-distributed iteration. What does the commonly-accepted term "real-time" really mean?