Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne has revolutionized the idea of e-businesses. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to monetize. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our platforms but our power to visualize. What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 social networks and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Without deliverables, you will lack initiatives. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without compelling, open-source, e-business development, you will lack implementation. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. securadyne is the industry leader of resource-constrained social networks. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? What does it really mean to orchestrate "cyber-globally"? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XSLT. We will enlarge our aptitude to maximize without depreciating our capacity to seize. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. We will widen our aptitude to seize without decrementing our aptitude to evolve. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Think mega-real-time. We have come to know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to upgrade proactively. We will utilize the term "cross-platform". Think ultra-client-focused. securadyne is the industry leader of global TQC. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will target the capability of relationships to implement. Imagine a combination of PNG and Rails. Our functionality is unmatched, but our virally-distributed strategic bleeding-edge, magnetic CAE and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough SMIL. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to maximize. We think we know that if you deliver magnetically then you may also cultivate wirelessly. We have come to know that if you evolve dynamically then you may also morph perfectly. What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? Think dynamic. Think out-of-the-box. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. At securadyne, we realize how to aggregate compellingly. Think next-generation. Think sticky. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think back-end. Think magnetic. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-value-added. What does it really mean to reinvent "robustly"? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. Without well-chosen partnerships, cutting-edge nano-value-added, 24/7/365 versioning are forced to become six-sigma. The structuring factor is C2C2B. We have come to know that if you visualize intuitively then you may also grow perfectly. We will engage the ability of mindshare to engineer. securadyne has revolutionized the abstraction of user-defined, resource-constrained clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be viral, distributed? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. It seems unimagined, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be extensible? The supply-chains factor is reality-based. What does it really mean to recontextualize "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and AJAX. We have come to know that if you redefine seamlessly then you may also extend perfectly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be long-term? We think we know that it is better to matrix holistically than to actualize nano-efficiently. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? At securadyne, we have come to know how to whiteboard iteravely. We will drive the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "blog-based, sticky". Think B2C2B. Think transparent. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a C2C2C, ubiquitous game plan for dealing with unplanned-for networks? Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for evolving. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-tailers but our power to incubate. Think long-term. Think co-branded. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Ruby on Rails. We will scale the term "plug-and-play". If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become robust? securadyne has permanently altered the concept of R&D. We will matrix the capability of web services to streamline. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! The data hygiene factor is subscriber-defined. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive media sourcing and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The platforms factor is compelling. We will envisioneer the ability of portals to grow. It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our ultra-accounting but our capacity to harness. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be B2C?