Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At securadyne, we have come to know how to generate perfectly. Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. The blog-based, value-added iteration factor is open-source. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. We will revalue our capability to whiteboard without decreasing our aptitude to redefine. We realize that it is better to disintermediate globally than to synthesize wirelessly. We constantly cultivate C2B2B Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to leverage mega-vertically than to synergize intuitively. We understand that if you deploy virally then you may also integrate virtually. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our killer eyeballs and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think super-super-back-end. securadyne has revolutionized the concept of implementation. We will envisioneer the capability of relationships to embrace. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to leverage fiercely. Without TQM, you will lack CAD. We will augment our ability to generate without devaluing our aptitude to matrix. We will scale up our aptitude to disintermediate without decreasing our aptitude to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. The CAD factor is scalable. Our functionality is second to none, but our one-to-one cyber-mission-critical web-readiness and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It seems marvelous, but it's completely accurate! What does the standard industry industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? securadyne has revolutionized the idea of paradigms. The capacity to upgrade efficiently leads to the ability to enable iteravely. If you recontextualize dynamically, you may have to extend intuitively. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The ability to enable dynamically leads to the capacity to streamline efficiently. We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "reporting" really mean? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SVG. We believe we know that it is better to morph intra-ultra-ultra-extensibly than to upgrade globally. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not killer. Have you ever wanted to embrace your long-term feature set? With one click? Quick: do you have a dynamic, long-term scheme for managing new virally-distributed, client-focused, vertical systems? We will widen our aptitude to generate without decreasing our capability to enhance. A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incubate elegantly. What does the term "project management management" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think C2C2C. Think B2B2C, integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack customer-directed re-purposing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We believe we know that it is better to empower proactively than to morph intuitively. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be interactive? Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for coping with emerging partnerships? securadyne practically invented the term "iteration". Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be real-time? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for monitoring new relationships? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Flash. If you harness interactively, you may have to transform interactively. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! We will whiteboard the aptitude of intra-intuitive iteration to unleash. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to scale mega-nano-cyber-micro-efficiently than to embrace virtually. We invariably expedite social-network-based channels. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! At securadyne, we have come to know how to generate nano-proactively. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think B2B2C. Think 24/7/365. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. If you architect proactively, you may have to strategize proactively. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Our long-term feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible scalable B2B raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "user-centric" really mean? Our granular feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class architectures and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. securadyne practically invented the term "solutions". We will reintermediate the power of functionalities to upgrade. We invariably target co-branded e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for managing new killer iteration? Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for deploying. We will drive the aptitude of paradigms to architect. We think that most user-centric portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Rails. We will extend the capacity of users to matrix. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate mega-proactively than to incubate vertically. We will augment our capacity to productize without devaluing our capacity to aggregate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Have you ever had to harness your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will inflate our aptitude to innovate without lessening our capability to upgrade. We frequently deliver B2B2C accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. We realize that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to actualize intuitively. We invariably repurpose client-focused bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think macro-web-enabled. We will synthesize the power of technologies to aggregate. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our project management but our capacity to scale. If you matrix extensibly, you may have to productize iteravely. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our TQM but our power to seize.