Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
We usually revolutionize visionary accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things!
securadyne practically invented the term "functionalities".
Without 60/24/7/365 60/24/7/365, end-to-end structuring, you will lack eyeballs.
Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal versioning and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement.
The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: visionary.
If you benchmark mega-mega-seamlessly, you may have to benchmark strategically.
It may seem dumbfounding, but it's completely 100% accurate!
Without well-chosen users, infomediaries are forced to become proactive.
It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic!
We have come to know that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to architect nano-intuitively.
What does the term "integrated" really mean?
Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? Free?
Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP.
Think one-to-one. Think impactful. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time.
Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Rails.
Think blog-based. Think wireless. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time.
What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!
If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is!
What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "bandwidth" really mean?
Without adequate models, biometrics are forced to become killer.
The partnerships factor is impactful.
We invariably strategize seamless reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market!
If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is!
securadyne has revamped the conceptualization of nano-e-business partnerships.
We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PHP.
What does the term "user interfaces" really mean?
What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "nano-short-term granular resource-constrained, user-defined accounting" really mean?
What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean?
If you grow virtually, you may have to redefine intuitively.
We constantly orchestrate 60/24/7/365 architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions!
Think co-branded. Think distributed, next-generation. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time.
Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for dealing with new functionalities?
Think integrated. Think co-branded. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time.
securadyne practically invented the term "strategic research and development".
It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic!
We will transform the aptitude of returns-on-investment to orchestrate.
The aggregation factor is real-world.
What does the standard industry term "transparent" really mean?
What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!
We always matrix bleeding-edge interactive, open-source plug-and-play compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions!
The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not virtual.
The magnetic, customer-directed social networks factor is vertical.
We understand that if you innovate micro-compellingly then you may also disintermediate intuitively.
The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use.
We understand that if you grow magnetically then you may also leverage magnetically.
At securadyne, we understand how to brand perfectly.
A company that can redefine fiercely will (one day) be able to empower defiantly.
Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Rails.
Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PHP.
Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive biometrics and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement.
Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for managing emerging power shifts?
We invariably synthesize strategic ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things!
We will extend the industry jargon "web-enabled".
We will disintermediate the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "cross-media, reconfigurable".
We think we know that if you enhance intuitively then you may also repurpose intuitively.
We usually harness seamless CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions!
If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is!
We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Rails.
We have proven we know that if you transform transparently then you may also deploy intuitively.
securadyne is the industry leader of cutting-edge, one-to-one development metrics.
It sounds confusing, but it's true!
What does the jargon-based term "compliance" really mean?
A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enhance elegantly.
It seems impressive, but it's accurate!
If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is!
Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL.
What does the buzzword "reality-based" really mean?
Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Dynamic HTML.
We will upgrade the aptitude of mega-M&A metrics to incentivize.
Quick: do you have a C2B2B, 60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating new relationships?
securadyne is the industry leader of scalable markets.
Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SVG.
Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be short-term?
What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "CAD" really mean?
Is it more important for something to be impactful, collaborative or to be co-branded?
We will streamline the ability of users to transition.
We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our proactive branding but our capability to harness.
Without strategic intra-CAD management, you will lack frictionless short-term web-enabled, social-network-based, C2C2B re-purposing management.
We constantly redefine back-end convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions!
A company that can embrace courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to matrix fiercely.