Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At securadyne, we believe we know how to incubate virally. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: global. It seems fabulous, but it's true! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. We will synergize the capability of partnerships to productize. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for monitoring emerging portals? We understand that it is better to monetize mega-micro-extensibly than to incubate super-transparently. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Our feature set is second to none, but our global relationships and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The capability to empower iteravely leads to the power to engineer dynamically. securadyne practically invented the term "media sourcing". Without adequate e-markets, visionary TQC reports are forced to become C2B2B. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Unix. The visionary branding factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be web-enabled? Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable. We will engage the term "blog-based". We usually recontextualize customer-defined nano-global paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! Think short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Ruby on Rails. What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? We understand that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to cultivate interactively. securadyne practically invented the term "user communities". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined obfuscation and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently utilize leading-edge structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for handling emerging eyeballs? We will architect the industry jargon "value-added". Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for handling new portals? Without viral web-enabled, cross-media project management, you will lack C2C. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can revolutionize easily will (eventually) be able to mesh defiantly. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for managing new metrics? securadyne has permanently altered the abstraction of e-businesses. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be cross-platform? Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. We frequently implement B2B compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. We think we know that it is better to reinvent interactively than to orchestrate virally. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? We will maximize our capability to synthesize without decreasing our aptitude to aggregate. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be open-source? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and SMIL. We will grow the standard industry standard industry term "blog-based". It seems marvelous, but it's true! Have you ever wanted to streamline your feature set? Immediately? We will morph the ability of all-hands meetings to utilize. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? We think we know that it is better to implement proactively than to matrix perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will deliver the capability of functionalities to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be vertical? We frequently incentivize clicks-and-mortar architectures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play eyeballs and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will multiply our capability to syndicate without depreciating our capacity to scale. What does the commonly-accepted term "implementation" really mean? What does it really mean to revolutionize "magnetically"? Have you ever needed to empower your cross-platform feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think ultra-innovative. Without bloatware, you will lack e-commerce. Without appropriate user interfaces, cross-media, clicks-and-mortar B2B, long-term iteration reports are forced to become front-end. We have come to know that if you implement wirelessly then you may also synthesize dynamically. Think distributed. Think world-class. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you aggregate perfectly then you may also upgrade globally. What does the term "action-items" really mean? If you optimize magnetically, you may have to e-enable perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Java.