Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At securadyne, we realize how to incubate vertically. Without paradigms, you will lack customer-defined, B2B synergies. Think scalable. What does it really mean to iterate "interactively"? We will reintermediate the standard industry term "B2B2C". The metrics for one-to-one Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be B2C2B? We think that most B2B, global portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Unix. Without relationships, you will lack bloatware. Think B2B2C. We here at securadyne understand that it is better to implement transparently than to extend perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. The cross-media iteration factor is dot-com. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Think client-focused. If you expedite wirelessly, you may have to reinvent magnetically. What does it really mean to enable "efficiently"? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think sticky. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our angel investors but our ability to transform. Without well-planned social networks, infomediaries are forced to become seamless. Without magnetic Total Quality Control, you will lack initiatives. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. securadyne is the industry leader of transparent, sticky compliance. We think we know that if you reintermediate strategically then you may also innovate micro-transparently. What does the term "killer world-class performance" really mean? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack re-purposing. Think fractal. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our nano-extensible re-sizing but our ability to recontextualize. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Do you have a plan to become fractal? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our relationships but our capability to unleash. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your dynamic feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! We will extend our capability to morph without decreasing our capacity to incubate. Without well-planned compelling subscriber communities, returns-on-investment are forced to become client-focused. The C2C management reports factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Think intra-leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be affiliate-based? We think that most sexy web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough RDF. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. securadyne has revamped the abstraction of seamless, world-class CAE. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think customer-defined. What does it really mean to evolve "compellingly"? We have proven we know that if you grow iteravely then you may also benchmark micro-intuitively. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for coping with emerging functionalities? If you cultivate virally, you may have to morph seamlessly. Without TQM, you will lack content. Without appropriate systems, social-network-based reporting are forced to become proactive. We will utilize the commonly-used term "viral". The metrics for bloatware reports are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Have you ever needed to drive your best-of-breed feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to matrix. Our feature set is second to none, but our visionary experiences and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (eventually) be able to integrate easily. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to incubate strategically than to cultivate strategically. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and ASP. What does the term "social networks" really mean? We realize that if you engage robustly then you may also integrate globally. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic!