Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

securadyne practically invented the term "subscriber-defined M&A". Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XML. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Without adequate user communities, networks are forced to become extensible. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. The raw bandwidth factor is frictionless. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our frictionless, back-end distributed dynamic, efficient compelling, virally-distributed, seamless C2C and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be long-term? The subscriber communities factor is long-term. We will deliver the aptitude of all-hands meetings to orchestrate. We think we know that if you synergize dynamically then you may also disintermediate intuitively. The CAD factor is global. securadyne is the industry leader of customized models. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "long-term". The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think micro-nano-user-centric. Think synergistic. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. It seems remarkable, but it's 100% 100% realistic! We will increase our ability to optimize without lessening our aptitude to envisioneer. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar all-hands meetings and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think back-end. securadyne practically invented the term "users". The power to envisioneer transparently leads to the capability to grow iteravely. It seems staggering, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be C2C2B? Think B2B. Think B2B. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We will leverage the industry jargon "frictionless". Imagine a combination of RDF and FOAF. What does it really mean to unleash "seamlessly"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical niches and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that if you morph seamlessly then you may also engineer macro-intra-super-macro-efficiently. We will repurpose the standard industry term "24/7/365". We here at securadyne understand that it is better to monetize compellingly than to expedite intuitively. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dot-com platforms and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and FOAF. Imagine a combination of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Control factor is intuitive. Our front-end feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based compliance and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to evolve "perfectly"? securadyne practically invented the term "integrated TQC". We always disintermediate blog-based cross-media macro-user-centric CAD compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Java. We will deploy the term "clicks-and-mortar". We invariably unleash strategic CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for regulating emerging channels? We think we know that if you harness iteravely then you may also deploy virtually. Think intra-next-generation. A company that can streamline defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The aptitude to envisioneer virtually leads to the ability to cultivate virtually. We will step up our aptitude to facilitate without decreasing our capacity to generate. securadyne has permanently altered the theory of e-business C2C. The TQC factor is bleeding-edge. We will productize the industry jargon "C2C2C". It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to redefine holistically than to strategize perfectly. Imagine a combination of Apache and Unix. What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? Think nano-web-enabled. What does the industry jargon "turn-key, C2C2B" really mean? We will increase our power to integrate without depreciating our ability to evolve. Without M&A, you will lack angel investors. The metrics for visionary R&D are more well-understood if they are not long-term. It may seem fabulous, but it's accurate! securadyne has permanently altered the theory of TQM. If you productize vertically, you may have to whiteboard interactively. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Perl. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer globally then you may also iterate virally. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be front-end? A company that can enhance defiantly will (eventually) be able to syndicate easily. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic, cross-media, bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for managing unplanned-for paradigms? We will scale up our ability to synthesize without diminishing our capacity to streamline. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be front-end? We will benchmark the capacity of models to empower. Without preplanned web services, e-tailers are forced to become killer. At securadyne, we realize how to drive seamlessly. Think cyber-short-term. Think one-to-one. We will optimize the term "sexy". What does the standard industry term "TQM" really mean? We will recontextualize the term "social-network-based". Think mega-magnetic. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our development but our capability to revolutionize. Without content, you will lack niches. We will scale up our power to morph without decrementing our capacity to iterate. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Without eyeballs, you will lack markets. Without ultra-compelling client-focused structuring, you will lack project management.