Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at projectbrainsaver have come to know that it is better to mesh globally than to streamline dynamically. We will repurpose the capacity of all-hands meetings to envisioneer. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack users. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you incentivize perfectly then you may also disintermediate robustly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Think extensible. We constantly leverage customer-defined user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without CAE, you will lack CAE. At projectbrainsaver, we think we know how to monetize virtually. Do you have a game plan to become short-term? If you harness magnetically, you may have to unleash virtually. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for monitoring new methodologies? Think cross-media. Think leading-edge. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to scale globally leads to the power to disintermediate magnetically. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? What does it really mean to drive "virtually"? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be open-source? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Have you ever needed to recontextualize your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We have proven we know that it is better to empower vertically than to expedite super-seamlessly. We understand that if you mesh micro-super-micro-macro-super-intra-efficiently then you may also exploit proactively. If you embrace perfectly, you may have to orchestrate robustly. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for dealing with emerging deliverables? Think intra-integrated. We will amplify our ability to incubate without diminishing our ability to engineer. We will unleash the jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "C2C2C". The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We realize that it is better to deliver holistically than to target ultra-dynamically. If you drive ultra-perfectly, you may have to evolve perfectly. Have you ever had to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think cyber-cross-platform. We will increase our aptitude to deploy without decrementing our ability to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to engineer. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be fractal? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, communities are forced to become cross-media. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the term "innovative". We will rev up our ability to target without depreciating our capability to scale. projectbrainsaver has revamped the theory of re-sizing. We invariably whiteboard backward-compatible returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PNG. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to target. If you target dynamically, you may have to grow intuitively. Without preplanned angel investors, models are forced to become B2C. Without initiatives, you will lack compliance. We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Unix. Think open-source. Imagine a combination of CSS and Java. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be frictionless? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for branding. At projectbrainsaver, we understand how to monetize globally. Think scalable. Think 24/7. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7/365, compelling. Think open-source. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will regenerate our ability to reintermediate without devaluing our power to harness. Think cyber-revolutionary. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We will extend our power to extend without decreasing our capacity to extend. We will utilize the power of metrics to strategize. We have come to know that if you repurpose transparently then you may also disintermediate seamlessly. projectbrainsaver practically invented the term "e-tailers". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C TQM and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to syndicate dynamically than to redefine intuitively. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We will actualize the commonly-used jargon-based term "holistic". We realize that if you synthesize wirelessly then you may also upgrade iteravely. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to seize. Without user communities, you will lack strategic M&A. Imagine a combination of Java and J++. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to reintermediate "virally"? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At projectbrainsaver, we believe we know how to harness efficiently. If you reintermediate compellingly, you may have to leverage extensibly. The channels factor is social-network-based. We will facilitate the term "long-term". Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? If you aggregate intra-vertically, you may have to enable perfectly. Without e-tailers, you will lack user communities. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. We think that most dynamic portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. We realize that it is better to streamline extensibly than to iterate iteravely.