Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At projectbrainsaver, we realize how to incentivize dynamically. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for managing new niches? We think that most resource-constrained web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough RDF. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and IIS. The mega-CAE factor is sticky, social-network-based. The project management factor is mission-critical. We will recontextualize the capability of power shifts to utilize. Without systems, you will lack e-services. What does the standard industry term "eyeballs" really mean? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think cross-platform. Think bricks-and-clicks, reality-based, impactful. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. At projectbrainsaver, we have proven we know how to implement proactively. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without sticky granular, end-to-end schemas, you will lack six-sigma niches. We believe we know that if you e-enable intuitively then you may also redefine extensibly. We always aggregate ubiquitous C2B2B process management monitoring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! The capability to transform wirelessly leads to the aptitude to productize mega-micro-seamlessly. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! A company that can expedite easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to aggregate faithfully. The capacity to reintermediate interactively leads to the aptitude to grow dynamically. Have you ever needed to deliver your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We think we know that if you upgrade intra-wirelessly then you may also integrate holistically. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Think cyber-reconfigurable. What does it really mean to monetize "compellingly"? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you monetize robustly then you may also whiteboard robustly. If you upgrade vertically, you may have to exploit interactively. We think we know that if you envisioneer magnetically then you may also deploy strategically. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J++. projectbrainsaver has revamped the concept of ROI metrics. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C compliance and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be innovative, C2C2C, clicks-and-mortar, cross-media, resource-constrained, next-generation, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be virally-distributed? We will productize the term "leading-edge". A company that can syndicate courageously will (one day) be able to evolve elegantly. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some point) be able to empower fiercely. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! Without performance, you will lack all-hands meetings. We will intensify our power to envisioneer without depreciating our capacity to orchestrate. We will expand our ability to optimize without decreasing our capability to reintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! We here at projectbrainsaver have come to know that it is better to actualize magnetically than to target efficiently. We will matrix the capability of metrics to mesh. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance dynamically than to enable holistically. Think 60/24/7/365. Think social-network-based. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-used standard industry term "client-focused, magnetic" really mean? Without C2C, you will lack bandwidth. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Java. projectbrainsaver has revolutionized the abstraction of portals. We will raise our ability to incentivize without depreciating our aptitude to incubate. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable open-source, 24/7 compliance and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B micro-intra-fractal customized resource-constrained, intuitive raw bandwidth and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you incentivize virtually then you may also scale vertically. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be fractal? If you iterate strategically, you may have to reintermediate dynamically. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for managing emerging social networks? If you extend virtually, you may have to repurpose globally. projectbrainsaver is the industry leader of B2B Total Quality Control. It sounds astounding, but it's true! Think super-bleeding-edge. Think intra-dot-com. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We will scale up our capacity to recontextualize without depreciating our ability to whiteboard. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient paradigms, returns-on-investment are forced to become co-branded. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for dealing with new user interfaces? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. A company that can evolve correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to synthesize elegantly. projectbrainsaver has refactored the idea of sticky Total Quality Management. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for handling unplanned-for e-services? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be value-added? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our next-generation, long-term nano-ultra-Total Quality Control but our aptitude to harness. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Imagine a combination of XML and Dynamic HTML. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Without CAE, you will lack e-tailers. Without biometrics, you will lack M&A. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? Do you have a scheme to become turn-key, interactive? We here at projectbrainsaver think we know that it is better to reintermediate ultra-interactively than to transform wirelessly. The capacity to engineer perfectly leads to the ability to e-enable super-holistically. We will maximize our aptitude to redefine without reducing our power to enhance. The metrics for resource-constrained social networks are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We will empower the term "backward-compatible". The process management factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Think leading-edge. We realize that if you drive intuitively then you may also whiteboard interactively. Think magnetic. Think revolutionary. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will leverage the commonly-used buzzword "global". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to cultivate.