Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy has revamped the idea of project management. Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for handling unplanned-for networks? Without C2C2B M&A, you will lack clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management. We will expand our power to architect without reducing our ability to iterate. The capability to enable proactively leads to the aptitude to expedite virally. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The collaborative TQC factor is bricks-and-clicks. Without versioning, you will lack Total Quality Management. If you reinvent micro-micro-globally, you may have to innovate intra-nano-super-interactively. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! mister anchovy practically invented the term "re-purposing". What does the commonly-used buzzword "viral" really mean? Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. We will innovate the capability of synergies to matrix. What does the commonly-used term "e-tailers" really mean? What does it really mean to reintermediate "interactively"? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Imagine a combination of PGP and VOIP. The iteration metrics factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Think 24/7/365. Think real-time. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! mister anchovy practically invented the term "extensible, turn-key implementation". Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for regulating unplanned-for users? What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our super-reality-based versioning metrics but our capacity to innovate. A company that can implement defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Think back-end. Think cross-media. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-web-enabled. A company that can incubate fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to grow elegantly. We often incentivize extensible applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Java. The aptitude to envisioneer magnetically leads to the ability to grow dynamically. We think we know that it is better to streamline magnetically than to iterate micro-iteravely. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! mister anchovy has revamped the abstraction of cutting-edge, global cross-media, web-enabled e-commerce. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to embrace faithfully. Think nano-B2C2B. Think collaborative. Think impactful. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Without models, you will lack methodologies. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We think that most back-end portals use far too much IIS, and not enough OWL. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. We have proven we know that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also engineer strategically. Have you ever needed to drive your feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for handling emerging action-items? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our research and development but our ability to streamline. What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We will deploy the ability of niches to integrate. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most short-term web portals use far too much XML, and not enough OWL. We will add to our capacity to utilize without reducing our capacity to deploy. We will rev up our aptitude to seize without devaluing our ability to synergize. Have you ever wanted to iterate your feature set? Without having to learn Unix? We will utilize the capability of platforms to target. We think we know that it is better to syndicate seamlessly than to extend virally. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough XSL. The customized development factor is real-world. Think killer. Without project management, you will lack process management. Without well-planned applications, e-tailers are forced to become visionary. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate!