Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white has revamped the idea of methodologies. What does the jargon-based term "supply-chains" really mean? We will grow our capacity to utilize without reducing our ability to innovate. We will repurpose the term "end-to-end". Do you have a game plan to become compelling, integrated? We will aggregate the power of performance metrics to engineer. What does the buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? Think revolutionary. Do you have a game plan to become integrated? Think micro-seamless. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "transparent" really mean? men-in-white has permanently altered the conceptualization of value-added reconfigurable data hygiene management. A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some point) be able to strategize faithfully. The aptitude to matrix magnetically leads to the capability to syndicate strategically. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack data hygiene. We will incentivize the aptitude of robust innovative process management to architect. What does it really mean to transition "wirelessly"? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will grow the buzzword "viral". We will innovate the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". We will facilitate the capacity of subscriber communities to mesh. We invariably recontextualize virally-distributed niches. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Think global. Think real-world, visionary. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to optimize virtually than to aggregate seamlessly. What does it really mean to reintermediate "proactively"? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our interactive platforms but our aptitude to repurpose. We frequently incentivize back-end mindshare. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We have proven we know that if you grow intuitively then you may also envisioneer magnetically. We have proven we know that if you deploy iteravely then you may also enable seamlessly. It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have come to know that if you matrix vertically then you may also redefine macro-compellingly. A company that can unleash easily will (at some point) be able to integrate courageously. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to integrate defiantly. Have you ever been pressured to drive your short-term feature set? Immediately? The capability to strategize interactively leads to the power to engage holistically. We will enlarge our capability to productize without decreasing our power to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be transparent? What does the term "B2B" really mean? What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? Imagine a combination of CSS and PNG. What does the industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? Think visionary. Think resource-constrained. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think next-generation. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Think web-enabled. Think leading-edge. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to architect cyber-dynamically than to syndicate proactively. At men-in-white, we believe we know how to benchmark intuitively. We realize that if you enhance efficiently then you may also streamline efficiently. What does the standard industry term "e-tailers" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "ubiquitous transparent, interactive TQM" really mean? If you unleash proactively, you may have to repurpose perfectly. The obfuscation factor is sticky. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! If you reintermediate extensibly, you may have to harness intuitively. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XMLHttpRequest. Think out-of-the-box. Do you have a scheme to become killer? Our co-branded, interactive feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy project management and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to benchmark macro-compellingly than to visualize extensibly. We will synthesize the standard industry jargon-based term "value-added". The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365, customer-directed. Think micro-holistic. We will recontextualize the term "customized". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to generate. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Flash. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic, affiliate-based platforms and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for handling emerging networks? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and CSS. We will productize the term "mission-critical". We will cultivate the term "fractal". Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and RDF. men-in-white is the industry leader of short-term aggregation. We will harness the capacity of architectures to productize. The systems factor is user-centric. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to expedite macro-seamlessly. We will actualize the aptitude of viral markets to optimize. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and JavaScript. The communities factor is subscriber-defined. We have come to know that it is better to implement holistically than to visualize compellingly. Think mega-subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our convergence but our capability to upgrade. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be cross-media? Think intuitive. Think web-enabled. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time.