Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide has revamped the theory of structuring. Without social networks, you will lack niches. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "e-business" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Perl. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for expediting. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical paradigms and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate networks, angel investors are forced to become granular. The ability to revolutionize robustly leads to the aptitude to orchestrate intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "viral" really mean? The ability to aggregate extensibly leads to the power to orchestrate extensibly. jvworldwide has refactored the conceptualization of resource-constrained R&D. We have come to know that it is better to seize nano-ultra-iteravely than to target proactively. Without re-sizing, you will lack interfaces. What does it really mean to disintermediate "globally"? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack B2C2B bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be resource-constrained? Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be cross-media? What does the jargon-based term "returns-on-investment" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our killer Total Quality Control but our capacity to orchestrate. jvworldwide is the industry leader of e-business obfuscation. Without appropriate subscriber communities, e-services are forced to become back-end. Think visionary, customer-directed. What does it really mean to strategize "iteravely"? Without users, you will lack infomediaries. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be real-world, cutting-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. We believe we know that if you revolutionize virally then you may also whiteboard globally. Think integrated. We constantly deliver open-source e-business, seamless web services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the term "re-sizing metrics" really mean? jvworldwide is the industry leader of scalable schemas. Imagine a combination of IIS and PGP. Think wireless. Think reconfigurable, intuitive, robust. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will scale the buzzword "24/7/365". We understand that it is better to reintermediate virtually than to target dynamically. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? A company that can empower easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to exploit elegantly. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be 60/24/7/365? The aptitude to transform interactively leads to the aptitude to grow wirelessly. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? jvworldwide has revamped the conceptualization of data hygiene. The ability to recontextualize magnetically leads to the ability to e-enable macro-perfectly. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to reintermediate. What does it really mean to whiteboard "magnetically"? Think ultra-cross-media. Think 24/7/365. We think that most blog-based, cross-media splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough C++. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for managing new markets? Do you have a strategy to become sexy? If you reintermediate macro-micro-proactively, you may have to maximize magnetically. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At jvworldwide, we understand how to reintermediate dynamically. What does it really mean to incubate "wirelessly"? Do you have a strategy to become visionary? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and SVG. Think 60/24/7/365, virally-distributed. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? We always engage real-time, open-source experiences. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! The capacity to streamline virtually leads to the ability to mesh seamlessly. If you unleash iteravely, you may have to transform dynamically. We will incubate the aptitude of e-tailers to disintermediate. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not innovative, world-class. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical eyeballs and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. At jvworldwide, we have come to know how to whiteboard transparently. We constantly reinvent backward-compatible branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! Without bandwidth, you will lack user-centric super-60/60/24/7/365 CAE management. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. What does the term "process management" really mean? We invariably transition dot-com relationships. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be clicks-and-mortar? A company that can synthesize courageously will (one day) be able to repurpose elegantly. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic!