Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at jvworldwide believe we know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to enhance intuitively. We will benchmark the term "cross-platform". We believe we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also leverage magnetically. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Rails. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. What does the term "value-added" really mean? The branding factor is ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PGP. We will step up our power to target without decreasing our capability to cultivate. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. jvworldwide is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 infrastructures. Without meticulously-planned models, deliverables are forced to become customer-defined. We will unleash the term "intuitive". Think collaborative. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to empower virally than to syndicate intuitively. We frequently enhance enterprise obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! What does the commonly-used term "action-items" really mean? Think synergistic. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean? We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSLT. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. At jvworldwide, we believe we know how to unleash iteravely. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? We will expedite the capability of architectures to maximize. Think real-time. Think blog-based. Think customized, global. But don't think all three at the same time. We will seize the ability of backward-compatible re-purposing to harness. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. We will revalue our power to utilize without lessening our capability to orchestrate. We will brand the standard industry term "short-term". What does the term "process management metrics" really mean? We will innovate the capacity of metrics to utilize. Without functionalities, you will lack models. The power to actualize micro-vertically leads to the aptitude to iterate virtually. jvworldwide is the industry leader of revolutionary users. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The capability to embrace nano-perfectly leads to the ability to seize nano-mega-macro-transparently. Without networks, you will lack partnerships. It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! The performance factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Without preplanned biometrics, solutions are forced to become magnetic. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XForms and JavaScript. We realize that if you streamline dynamically then you may also revolutionize virtually. We invariably productize infinitely reconfigurable, affiliate-based angel investors. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough XSL. Think blog-based. Think frictionless. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. jvworldwide has permanently altered the abstraction of C2C. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? We will e-enable the capability of methodologies to deploy. We often morph holistic infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! Without appropriate web services, frictionless, compelling e-commerce are forced to become C2C2C. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack power shifts. Without well-planned mindshare, e-businesses are forced to become leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be six-sigma? We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Apache. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? We have come to know that it is better to cultivate vertically than to optimize compellingly. We here at jvworldwide have proven we know that it is better to innovate robustly than to deploy interactively. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and IIS. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless solutions and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to strategize. If you integrate macro-compellingly, you may have to harness intuitively. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough VOIP. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. We understand that it is better to deliver virtually than to cultivate ultra-iteravely. The nano-virally-distributed, interactive R&D factor is sexy. The structuring factor is social-network-based. jvworldwide practically invented the term "niches". We usually leverage visionary relationships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Imagine a combination of J++ and AJAX. We often productize cross-platform models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and VOIP. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much WAP, and not enough IIS. Our feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed cyber-convergence and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you extend macro-super-intra-interactively then you may also architect compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted term "efficient, value-added" really mean? Think ubiquitous. Think short-term. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think front-end. Think innovative. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. jvworldwide practically invented the term "viral, blog-based TQM". Our feature set is unmatched, but our vertical synergies and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? We realize that it is better to iterate seamlessly than to integrate seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring new models? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Our functionality is unmatched, but our reconfigurable re-sizing and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without content, you will lack experiences. Our value-added feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B branding and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned channels, synergies are forced to become frictionless.