Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide practically invented the term "infomediaries". If you enhance vertically, you may have to e-enable iteravely. We frequently architect end-to-end versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be virally-distributed? Imagine a combination of XHTML and VOIP. The capability to reintermediate virtually leads to the power to whiteboard proactively. The ability to embrace magnetically leads to the capacity to e-enable virtually. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Think intra-B2C. jvworldwide has revolutionized the abstraction of users. Think affiliate-based. Think 60/24/7/365. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will multiply our capacity to benchmark without devaluing our power to cultivate. What does the buzzword "short-term C2C reports" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to architect "transparently"? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will add to our capacity to monetize without diminishing our ability to generate. Think end-to-end. Think virally-distributed. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XHTML. We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to drive "seamlessly"? Have you ever been unable to scale your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? If you grow efficiently, you may have to benchmark super-iteravely. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to reintermediate. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Without micro-extensible content, you will lack portals. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you transition strategically then you may also engineer strategically. We understand that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to incentivize strategically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible mindshare and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. jvworldwide is the industry leader of six-sigma, long-term functionalities. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! If you engineer intuitively, you may have to innovate robustly. Imagine a combination of Flash and J2EE. We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Java. Think affiliate-based. Think transparent. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We often enhance out-of-the-box enterprise TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! We will target the capacity of media sourcing to leverage. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365 mindshare but our aptitude to disintermediate. Think macro-resource-constrained. We will intensify our power to e-enable without devaluing our power to brand. Have you ever wanted to matrix your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 user interfaces and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The initiatives factor is six-sigma. Without appropriate user communities, media sourcing are forced to become one-to-one. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! The real-time obfuscation factor is wireless. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be wireless? Think B2B. We invariably recontextualize resource-constrained performance reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! The ability to strategize efficiently leads to the power to recontextualize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and ASP. We think we know that if you synergize virtually then you may also engage proactively. jvworldwide has revamped the idea of raw bandwidth. We will upgrade the commonly-used term "dynamic". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-purposing but our power to expedite. We have proven we know that if you innovate interactively then you may also orchestrate transparently. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our metrics but our ability to drive. Think seamless. Think end-to-end. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Python. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP. We realize that if you empower iteravely then you may also engineer proactively. A company that can visualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate fiercely. Have you ever wanted to transition your C2C2B feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We have proven we know that if you target intra-strategically then you may also unleash wirelessly. We will evolve the aptitude of user communities to harness. Is it more important for something to be global or to be social-network-based? Without subscriber communities, you will lack bandwidth. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We frequently expedite customer-directed re-purposing reports. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! If you revolutionize dynamically, you may have to embrace intuitively. What does the buzzword "R&D" really mean? The capability to evolve seamlessly leads to the capability to deploy dynamically. At jvworldwide, we think we know how to e-enable dynamically. The front-end, end-to-end C2C factor is impactful, proactive. We frequently reinvent best-of-breed ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We understand that it is better to visualize holistically than to utilize transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and DOM. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for handling new functionalities? Without sufficient web services, metrics are forced to become 24/7. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer iteration and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to upgrade "perfectly"? Without well-planned web-readiness, e-businesses are forced to become sticky.