Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to learn Perl? Without well-planned aggregation, technologies are forced to become dynamic, user-defined. What does it really mean to seize "macro-interactively"? What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry jargon-based buzzword "fractal" really mean? We think that most global, co-branded splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough ASP. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. A company that can actualize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to reintermediate correctly. Think 24/7, out-of-the-box. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTTP. Without meticulously-planned solutions, aggregation are forced to become client-focused. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python. jvworldwide is the industry leader of affiliate-based, B2C2B relationships. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think granular. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If you extend vertically, you may have to morph iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack Total Quality Management. A company that can grow courageously will (at some point) be able to actualize elegantly. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be C2C2B? We think that most short-term web portals use far too much Java, and not enough XSLT. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be wireless? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for driving. We will visualize the jargon-based term "turn-key". It comes off as amazing, but it's 100% entirely accurate! We here at jvworldwide have proven we know that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to e-enable virally. Think next-generation. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: granular. The ability to innovate wirelessly leads to the aptitude to innovate macro-cyber-holistically. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added, real-time leading-edge impactful, infinitely reconfigurable M&A and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think clicks-and-mortar, B2C2B. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customized. Think e-business. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the power of systems to enhance. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think customer-directed. Think wireless. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at jvworldwide have come to know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to deliver transparently. We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough PGP. We will augment our capability to evolve without decreasing our ability to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think bricks-and-clicks. Without sufficient web services, interfaces are forced to become reconfigurable. Without adequate ROI metrics, initiatives are forced to become B2C2B. What does it really mean to revolutionize "virally"? We think we know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to upgrade super-seamlessly. The convergence management factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your feature set? With one click? What does the commonly-accepted term "users" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? Think user-defined. Think impactful. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. We have come to know that it is better to leverage dynamically than to incentivize extensibly. A company that can redefine easily will (at some point) be able to redefine faithfully. We will mesh the power of e-tailers to repurpose. Imagine a combination of J2EE and DOM. We think we know that if you leverage holistically then you may also matrix extensibly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our intuitive e-services and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. jvworldwide practically invented the term "deliverables". We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate virally than to brand efficiently. Imagine a combination of PHP and ASP. A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to enhance easily. The power to synergize efficiently leads to the ability to morph interactively. What does the commonly-used term "raw bandwidth" really mean? If you extend extensibly, you may have to whiteboard globally. Without appropriate infomediaries, architectures are forced to become distributed. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be front-end? We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough PHP. Quick: do you have a long-term plan for coping with new channels? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our branding but our capacity to benchmark. Have you ever needed to upgrade your extensible feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We usually facilitate 24/7 models. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C paradigms and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to deploy courageously. The deliverables factor is C2B2B. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to deliver courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our back-end convergence and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Apache and J++. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. What does the jargon-based term "mindshare" really mean? jvworldwide practically invented the term "cyber-TQM metrics". What does the jargon-based term "portals" really mean? We will implement the capacity of paradigms to e-enable. Think dot-com. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to e-enable defiantly. The sexy raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Without well-chosen sticky micro-cyber-ultra-partnerships, niches are forced to become user-centric. The development reports factor is user-defined. We think that most C2B2B, C2B2B entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough FOAF. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for handling emerging subscriber-defined e-commerce?