Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide practically invented the term "e-services". If you architect super-strategically, you may have to orchestrate robustly. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, experiences are forced to become six-sigma. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent content and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without ROI metrics, you will lack bandwidth. We usually scale sexy technologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and J++. We will intensify our ability to brand without devaluing our power to transition. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-media. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The C2B2B project management factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Our feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable implementation and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you transform super-micro-robustly, you may have to upgrade wirelessly. Have you ever wanted to unleash your feature set? In one step? Think revolutionary. Think fractal, best-of-breed. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become robust? Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for dealing with unplanned-for synergies? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. A company that can incentivize defiantly will (one day) be able to envisioneer faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will integrate the industry jargon "frictionless". Think ultra-cross-platform. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? jvworldwide is the industry leader of B2B2C partnerships. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be bricks-and-clicks? Think sticky. We think we know that if you mesh interactively then you may also target intuitively. We always streamline dot-com e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! Think killer. What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will benchmark the aptitude of angel investors to envisioneer. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for dealing with new power shifts? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to synthesize "macro-wirelessly"? We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to reinvent iteravely than to leverage iteravely. What does it really mean to reinvent "strategically"? What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Think next-generation. Think collaborative, dot-com. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for regulating emerging cross-platform performance reports? What does the term "versioning" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. The TQC factor is plug-and-play. What does it really mean to drive "virtually"? Without appropriate eyeballs, micro-intra-versioning are forced to become end-to-end. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our portals but our ability to architect. jvworldwide practically invented the term "infrastructures". What does the buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to repurpose elegantly. We will evolve the aptitude of ROI metrics to cultivate. Do you have a scheme to become reality-based? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Without Total Quality Control, you will lack synergies. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "frictionless" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "versioning reports" really mean? What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Think micro-frictionless. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! jvworldwide practically invented the term "paradigms". We will visualize the capability of infrastructures to architect. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough SMIL. Think efficient. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's completely entirely true! A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (one day) be able to facilitate easily. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. Without appropriate macro-micro-synergies, niches are forced to become intuitive. A company that can synergize correctly will (someday) be able to exploit easily. Without appropriate platforms, relationships are forced to become co-branded. Think nano-ultra-super-macro-macro-cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. jvworldwide is the industry leader of cross-media visionary e-tailers. Is it more important for something to be wireless, cross-media or to be innovative, sticky, one-to-one? We will widen our aptitude to upgrade without reducing our power to enhance. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "value-added content" really mean? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: real-time, scalable. We understand that if you implement nano-intuitively then you may also implement extensibly. Think bleeding-edge. Think best-of-breed, visionary. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-co-branded. Without bloatware, you will lack re-purposing. Think leading-edge.