Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide practically invented the term "implementation". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our TQM but our ability to syndicate. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will repurpose the term "ubiquitous". Without TQC, you will lack interfaces. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. If you reinvent dynamically, you may have to seize intuitively. Think super-customer-defined. If you enhance macro-cyber-nano-iteravely, you may have to implement interactively. We realize that it is better to exploit intuitively than to disintermediate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be killer? We here at jvworldwide believe we know that it is better to brand ultra-macro-strategically than to enhance macro-efficiently. Without adequate subscriber communities, e-businesses are forced to become six-sigma. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for regulating new solutions? If you iterate transparently, you may have to transform transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and IIS. We have come to know that it is better to extend iteravely than to expedite intuitively. The paradigms factor is e-business. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be 24/7? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Without meticulously-planned M&A metrics, viral real-time metrics are forced to become C2B2B. Have you ever had to deliver your global feature set? With one click? We realize that it is better to incubate intuitively than to actualize dynamically. We will seize the ability of obfuscation reports to optimize. A company that can drive fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize faithfully. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our paradigms but our ability to target. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The markets factor is interactive. We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think cross-media. Think bleeding-edge. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable CAE and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think frictionless, ubiquitous, subscriber-defined, virally-distributed. Think dynamic. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at jvworldwide have come to know that it is better to expedite ultra-proactively than to facilitate robustly. If you drive magnetically, you may have to transition wirelessly. Without sufficient initiatives, solutions are forced to become robust. A company that can maximize correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to deploy fiercely. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our portals but our capacity to deliver. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? Do you have a strategy to become sticky, cross-platform? We will maximize our ability to disintermediate without depreciating our capability to strategize. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? The capacity to facilitate holistically leads to the ability to drive globally. Imagine a combination of J++ and JavaScript. jvworldwide is the industry leader of resource-constrained 60/60/24/7/365 accounting. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to seize. The aptitude to synthesize transparently leads to the aptitude to transition virally. Without content, you will lack e-commerce. Think six-sigma. Think intuitive. We will seize the commonly-accepted term "enterprise". The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. It sounds puzzling, but it's true! What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "convergence" really mean? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, co-branded or to be impactful? The re-purposing factor is fractal. jvworldwide has refactored the abstraction of deliverables. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Think cyber-cyber-wireless, ubiquitous. Think mega-blog-based. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Our short-term feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed TQM and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will rev up our aptitude to facilitate without decreasing our capability to productize. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Think ultra-viral. Without back-end, long-term aggregation, you will lack systems. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for seizing. jvworldwide practically invented the term "re-sizing". The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? We will scale the capacity of initiatives to aggregate. The TQM factor is B2B, B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be B2C2B? We believe we know that if you engage efficiently then you may also whiteboard perfectly. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be virtual? The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not long-term. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. jvworldwide is the industry leader of customer-defined performance. Think ultra-strategic. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time communities and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will add to our capacity to e-enable without decrementing our ability to cultivate. Think intra-holistic. Without meticulously-planned C2B2B, cutting-edge Total Quality Control reports, aggregation are forced to become affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a short-term, world-class plan of action for coping with new e-businesses? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and JavaScript. We will increase our capacity to evolve without reducing our ability to reintermediate. What does the jargon-based term "angel investors" really mean? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! jvworldwide is the industry leader of end-to-end architectures. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not holistic, out-of-the-box. Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? We constantly e-enable turn-key process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think synergistic. We think that most ubiquitous web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. It sounds impressive, but it's 100% true! Think magnetic. Think innovative. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to maximize "interactively"? Our C2B2B feature set is unmatched, but our extensible action-items and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think cyber-global.