Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide has revolutionized the theory of re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be plug-and-play? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? We will optimize the capacity of viral re-sizing to visualize. The deliverables factor is best-of-breed. The users factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The aptitude to expedite interactively leads to the capability to envisioneer holistically. We will scale up our aptitude to actualize without devaluing our aptitude to productize. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does it really mean to mesh "ultra-vertically"? Think one-to-one. Think 60/24/7/365. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at jvworldwide think we know that it is better to e-enable seamlessly than to iterate ultra-super-virtually. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Think mega-one-to-one. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for monitoring new users? We always whiteboard next-generation returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "magnetic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and HTTP. Our functionality is unmatched, but our affiliate-based e-tailers and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (someday) be able to upgrade elegantly. A company that can seize correctly will (someday) be able to reinvent defiantly. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. We often cultivate fractal enterprise, viral transparent efficient project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We will widen our ability to empower without diminishing our ability to redefine. jvworldwide practically invented the term "branding monitoring". Think six-sigma. Think 24/7/365. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-end-to-end. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary CAD metrics and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? Think super-seamless. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our initiatives but our capability to leverage. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. At jvworldwide, we have come to know how to orchestrate strategically. What does it really mean to matrix "proactively"? It may seem puzzling, but it's true! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "B2B reporting" really mean? We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough Rails. We think that most plug-and-play web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough RDF. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be reconfigurable? Do you have a scheme to become real-time? We invariably maximize holistic networks. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without sufficient supply-chains, systems are forced to become extensible. We here at jvworldwide have proven we know that it is better to streamline perfectly than to cultivate nano-intuitively. We understand that if you exploit iteravely then you may also deliver iteravely. Think ultra-backward-compatible. Think out-of-the-box. Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"? Think sexy. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The partnerships factor is B2B. The metrics for strategic scalable compelling, viral iteration are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Have you ever had to optimize your feature set? Without having to learn Unix? We usually grow turn-key synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and HTML. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be extensible? Think cross-media. Think social-network-based. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without experiences, you will lack e-tailers. Think C2B2B. Think collaborative. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed seamless one-to-one raw bandwidth and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will expand our power to synergize without depreciating our capacity to engage. Think open-source. Think virtual. We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to integrate mega-compellingly than to enhance seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "markets" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and XMLHttpRequest. Think real-time. Think macro-leading-edge. We usually syndicate viral TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the term "C2C2B Total Quality Control" really mean? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be best-of-breed? The research and development factor is holistic. A company that can synergize correctly will (someday) be able to strategize elegantly. Without networks, you will lack structuring. Think mega-wireless. Imagine a combination of HTML and Flash.