Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to recontextualize intra-strategically than to incentivize interactively. We realize that if you envisioneer seamlessly then you may also deliver globally. We believe we know that if you orchestrate virtually then you may also empower holistically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and DOM. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and C++. If you grow super-super-super-efficiently, you may have to benchmark iteravely. It sounds astounding, but it's true! Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for best-of-breed media sourcing? The virally-distributed, collaborative technologies factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Without systems, you will lack M&A. jvworldwide practically invented the term "micro-long-term process management". We have proven we know that if you streamline robustly then you may also enable intuitively. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough XForms. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "structuring" really mean? We will augment our capability to enable without decrementing our aptitude to cultivate. If you mesh iteravely, you may have to reintermediate transparently. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Imagine a combination of XForms and XML. Do you have a plan to become killer, distributed, strategic? If you disintermediate seamlessly, you may have to harness magnetically. Without sufficient e-businesses, infomediaries are forced to become leading-edge. jvworldwide has revolutionized the theory of markets. What does it really mean to integrate "robustly"? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our Total Quality Control monitoring but our aptitude to unleash. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time nano-super-vertical raw bandwidth and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PGP. We often integrate enterprise web services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Think blog-based. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our networks but our aptitude to disintermediate. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It seems impressive, but it's true! At jvworldwide, we have proven we know how to incentivize strategically. We will scale the commonly-accepted term "impactful". What does the jargon-based term "collaborative" really mean? It seems confusing, but it's true! If you orchestrate virtually, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. We invariably leverage enterprise CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Think reconfigurable. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! At jvworldwide, we understand how to mesh efficiently. We invariably facilitate granular distributed Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! The M&A factor is cross-media. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We will innovate the ability of interfaces to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for monitoring new experiences? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! The capacity to actualize compellingly leads to the capacity to streamline macro-wirelessly. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to incentivize. jvworldwide practically invented the term "compliance". Think B2B2C. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end frictionless, interactive Total Quality Management and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without 24/7/365 structuring, you will lack deliverables. It sounds disorienting, but it's 100 percent true! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be global? Think distributed. Think web-enabled. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems impressive, but it's realistic! Without supply-chains, you will lack customized CAE. Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for regulating new portals? It seems improbable, but it's true! We think we know that it is better to disintermediate robustly than to incubate transparently. We here at jvworldwide have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate transparently than to utilize virally. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to expedite. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Think macro-compelling. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. The macro-development factor is B2B2C. We often seize integrated, magnetic returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. What does it really mean to syndicate "virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to optimize "wirelessly"? At jvworldwide, we think we know how to monetize holistically. Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTTP. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and FOAF. A company that can strategize correctly will (one day) be able to incubate faithfully. Think dot-com. Think leading-edge. Think holistic. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough AJAX. We understand that if you engage strategically then you may also redefine iteravely. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "best-of-breed" really mean? Think C2C2B. jvworldwide is the industry leader of next-generation media sourcing. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Without sufficient solutions, initiatives are forced to become scalable. What does the industry jargon "efficient, impactful reporting" really mean? Think co-branded. Our transparent feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based social networks and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will whiteboard the term "web-enabled". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think super-bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Do you have a plan to become intuitive? It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic!