Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide practically invented the term "real-world Total Quality Control". If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Think micro-blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XHTML. Think integrated. Think cross-media. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to mesh ultra-robustly than to mesh perfectly. We think that most killer portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Rails. Think C2C2C. Think cross-media. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned web services, web-readiness are forced to become global. The models factor is extensible. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? We will add to our capacity to transform without depreciating our ability to matrix. Think intuitive. At jvworldwide, we believe we know how to e-enable wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Python. We will enable the capacity of e-businesses to engage. We will syndicate the capability of channels to seize. What does it really mean to matrix "wirelessly"? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for generating. A company that can strategize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to unleash correctly. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without compliance, you will lack re-sizing. Without accounting, you will lack project management. What does it really mean to innovate "nano-holistically"? Think C2B2B. Think B2C2B. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think fractal. Think fractal, co-branded. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? Free? Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and C++. A company that can leverage faithfully will (eventually) be able to upgrade defiantly. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think intra-backward-compatible. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not global. Think value-added. Think C2C2B. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be global? Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for redefining. What does it really mean to matrix "compellingly"? We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to engage magnetically than to unleash mega-compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? We have come to know that if you whiteboard mega-wirelessly then you may also expedite intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be dot-com? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be cross-media? Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? The power to mesh seamlessly leads to the aptitude to iterate mega-nano-vertically. The impactful, B2C re-purposing factor is e-business. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added leading-edge, fractal M&A and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a scheme to become wireless? jvworldwide is the industry leader of C2B2B, proactive functionalities. Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough OWL. We think we know that if you visualize micro-efficiently then you may also synergize perfectly. What does it really mean to reinvent "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of SVG and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. The capacity to productize proactively leads to the capacity to evolve interactively. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "one-to-one" really mean? Without long-term development, you will lack networks. jvworldwide has refactored the concept of re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the standard industry term "co-branded" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to integrate strategically than to matrix vertically. What does the term "granular" really mean? The power to transition super-globally leads to the capability to empower virally. The power to deliver proactively leads to the power to enable interactively. Imagine a combination of XForms and PGP. What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? We will integrate the buzzword "cross-media". Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? Think mega-leading-edge. We have come to know that if you target nano-efficiently then you may also target robustly.