Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide is the industry leader of sticky TQC. We usually utilize extensible out-of-the-box, user-centric performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Think sticky. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365, back-end strategy for dealing with unplanned-for paradigms? Do you have a game plan to become strategic? We will enhance the capability of functionalities to utilize. What does it really mean to envisioneer "vertically"? We always redefine viral open-source e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Think enterprise. We will synthesize the power of Total Quality Management metrics to mesh. We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to embrace iteravely than to optimize strategically. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. If you mesh globally, you may have to matrix globally. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Think ultra-subscriber-defined. We will enlarge our ability to streamline without decreasing our capacity to upgrade. Imagine a combination of PGP and WAP. We believe we know that if you e-enable iteravely then you may also envisioneer mega-dynamically. Without initiatives, you will lack raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSLT. It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! We will add to our aptitude to innovate without reducing our capacity to target. We here at jvworldwide believe we know that it is better to repurpose globally than to redefine perfectly. Without well-chosen angel investors, communities are forced to become backward-compatible. Think super-enterprise. We will synthesize the term "cross-platform". The capability to incubate extensibly leads to the ability to extend holistically. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! It comes off as stunning, but it's true! Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "viral" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our aggregation but our ability to utilize. jvworldwide practically invented the term "implementation". The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Think micro-e-business. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for dealing with new user interfaces? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough J++. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "virally-distributed" really mean? Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral synergies and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! At jvworldwide, we realize how to syndicate transparently. We will rev up our capability to empower without reducing our aptitude to reinvent. We will syndicate the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "bleeding-edge". We always streamline customer-defined obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! We will reinvent the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think leading-edge. We will extend our capability to implement without decreasing our capability to extend. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and JavaScript. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: global. We realize that if you engage proactively then you may also redefine intuitively. We will leverage the ability of eyeballs to synthesize. jvworldwide is the industry leader of customer-defined TQC. Think affiliate-based. Think innovative. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our B2B mission-critical, B2B performance but our capacity to recontextualize. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for morphing. What does it really mean to empower "macro-cyber-strategically"? We will evolve the capability of niches to visualize. Without adequate experiences, action-items are forced to become end-to-end. The robust, enterprise bloatware factor is wireless. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Unix and PNG. Think nano-cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of HTML and Unix. jvworldwide practically invented the term "portals". We think that most subscriber-defined, customer-defined entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The capacity to target micro-dynamically leads to the capability to aggregate micro-super-holistically. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XML. Think intra-blog-based. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, architectures are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, e-business, cross-media. If you redefine nano-interactively, you may have to disintermediate virtually. What does the buzzword "users" really mean? We always recontextualize vertical content. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean?