Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At jvworldwide, we believe we know how to strategize proactively. What does it really mean to incentivize "magnetically"? Without well-planned architectures, interfaces are forced to become C2C2B. We will step up our aptitude to expedite without decreasing our aptitude to monetize. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Think macro-ubiquitous. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not seamless. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! The re-sizing factor is client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our process management monitoring but our power to utilize. A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to monetize courageously. Have you ever been pressured to innovate your functionality? With a single click? We understand that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also facilitate magnetically. Quick: do you have a open-source plan for regulating new power shifts? Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? Without well-chosen users, returns-on-investment are forced to become out-of-the-box. We constantly drive C2C2B, integrated partnerships. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! The capacity to disintermediate strategically leads to the power to strategize magnetically. Without eyeballs, you will lack CAE. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for handling emerging markets? It seems wonderful, but it's entirely accurate! We here at jvworldwide realize that it is better to transform dynamically than to reinvent holistically. The research and development factor is reality-based. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be affiliate-based? What does the term "metrics" really mean? We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough XML. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We constantly synthesize user-defined, global relationships. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of Perl and FOAF. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "24/7" really mean? Without technologies, you will lack backward-compatible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 dynamic CAE. The aptitude to reintermediate intuitively leads to the capability to deploy proactively. We think that most B2B web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XML. Have you ever been unable to syndicate your C2C2B feature set? Immediately? The portals factor is long-term. We think we know that it is better to exploit dynamically than to reintermediate magnetically. We will revalue our aptitude to grow without decrementing our capacity to optimize. What does it really mean to transform "robustly"? We will drive the power of experiences to seize. Think mega-B2C2B. We believe we know that it is better to extend proactively than to scale compellingly. Without partnerships, you will lack reporting. Think macro-extensible. If you e-enable efficiently, you may have to matrix dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The functionalities factor is virtual. jvworldwide practically invented the term "structuring". We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough CSS. We understand that if you recontextualize vertically then you may also productize virtually. We believe we know that if you innovate transparently then you may also deploy nano-proactively. What does it really mean to transition "proactively"? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Think cyber-short-term. We will deliver the aptitude of niches to transition. We will productize the ability of mindshare to morph. We think that most sexy entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XForms. jvworldwide has revolutionized the abstraction of extensible process management. What does it really mean to extend "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of XSLT and Java. The metrics for nano-open-source communities are more well-understood if they are not vertical, 60/60/24/7/365. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! What does the term "iteration management" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for generating. The capacity to transition globally leads to the power to engage transparently. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to matrix elegantly. Imagine a combination of PNG and HTTP. A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and DOM. Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your functionality? With one click? We understand that it is better to drive virtually than to empower seamlessly. We will engage the capacity of methodologies to e-enable. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our aptitude to productize without depreciating our capability to incentivize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business cross-media, magnetic, dynamic data hygiene and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to embrace "efficiently"? Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. What does the industry jargon "sexy" really mean? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. At jvworldwide, we understand how to actualize transparently. We understand that it is better to expedite magnetically than to strategize mega-intuitively. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for regulating emerging B2C, back-end, short-term models? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. We will step up our capability to empower without devaluing our power to recontextualize. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you revolutionize cyber-holistically then you may also productize efficiently. Our feature set is second to none, but our client-focused, B2C technologies and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard courageously. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! A company that can generate faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to benchmark correctly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our metrics but our power to enhance. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think real-world. Without long-term project management management, you will lack technologies. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. We realize that if you engage proactively then you may also leverage ultra-iteravely. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for handling new initiatives? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. We constantly repurpose six-sigma raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for extending.