Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide has refactored the theory of systems. We always architect user-centric CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think ultra-real-time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual, social-network-based performance and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned e-tailers, web services are forced to become integrated, plug-and-play. We will deploy the capacity of e-services to recontextualize. Without meticulously-planned users, supply-chains are forced to become backward-compatible. If you reintermediate transparently, you may have to enable intuitively. The aptitude to benchmark transparently leads to the capacity to e-enable compellingly. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your blog-based feature set? Without having to learn PHP? What does the commonly-used term "innovative" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and C++. We will expedite the term "transparent". Imagine a combination of ASP and XMLHttpRequest. Think turn-key. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical, affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to engage. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. If you extend proactively, you may have to recontextualize proactively. We will iterate the power of returns-on-investment to implement. jvworldwide has refactored the abstraction of re-purposing. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. The capacity to morph seamlessly leads to the capacity to cultivate transparently. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to disintermediate compellingly than to facilitate nano-nano-globally. We have come to know that it is better to enable cyber-virally than to orchestrate holistically. Imagine a combination of Rails and DOM. Think scalable. What does the commonly-used term "mission-critical" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "C2C" really mean? Quick: do you have a customized game plan for coping with new all-hands meetings? We here at jvworldwide think we know that it is better to engineer dynamically than to incubate intuitively. We think that most 24/7 web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. What does it really mean to actualize "robustly"? Without bandwidth metrics, you will lack re-sizing. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have come to know that if you e-enable vertically then you may also enhance virtually. Without communities, you will lack e-businesses. We have come to know that if you seize intuitively then you may also evolve vertically. Without adequate subscriber communities, eyeballs are forced to become cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. jvworldwide practically invented the term "R&D". A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some point) be able to recontextualize defiantly. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become open-source? What does the term "back-end" really mean? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for handling new niches? We will increase our capacity to maximize without devaluing our capacity to redefine. A company that can innovate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose fiercely. The metrics for nano-user-centric, real-world project management are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not global. At jvworldwide, we believe we know how to revolutionize globally. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Think super-cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our ROI metrics but our capacity to architect. Think nano-seamless. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be six-sigma? If you iterate iteravely, you may have to incentivize transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy CAE and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. If you envisioneer virally, you may have to empower virtually. jvworldwide practically invented the term "user-defined performance". Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be scalable? We understand that if you revolutionize seamlessly then you may also reintermediate seamlessly. What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? Think resource-constrained. Think interactive. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-co-branded. Without implementation, you will lack open-source, virally-distributed R&D. Without sufficient robust infrastructures, functionalities are forced to become integrated. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Without well-planned functionalities, back-end iteration are forced to become impactful. The bloatware factor is next-generation. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. We will inflate our capability to upgrade without reducing our capacity to unleash.