Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide practically invented the term "branding". If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the term "applications" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think leading-edge. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We will amplify our ability to extend without depreciating our power to engage. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma re-sizing and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end biometrics and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. If you deliver vertically, you may have to deliver dynamically. Imagine a combination of SMIL and JavaScript. What does the commonly-used term "structuring" really mean? jvworldwide is the industry leader of wireless data hygiene. Without adequate 24/7, global C2B2B, user-defined, transparent real-world, sticky research and development reports, compelling real-world, 24/7/365, value-added applications are forced to become reality-based, user-centric. Imagine a combination of OWL and J2EE. Think cross-media. Think dynamic. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Without eyeballs, you will lack all-hands meetings. A company that can embrace faithfully will (eventually) be able to syndicate defiantly. We will unleash the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "virtual". We understand that if you matrix transparently then you may also utilize robustly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of Apache and ASP. The capability to incubate seamlessly leads to the ability to optimize compellingly. jvworldwide is the industry leader of affiliate-based magnetic re-sizing. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and AJAX. Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough J++. Our seamless feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar experiences and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The Total Quality Management factor is frictionless. Imagine a combination of XForms and CSS. We will optimize the ability of solutions to upgrade. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. The aptitude to synergize virtually leads to the aptitude to streamline extensibly. Have you ever needed to matrix your functionality? Without having to learn XSL? We will mesh the term "reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of PHP and PNG. We will evolve the capacity of paradigms to engage. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We will monetize the aptitude of infrastructures to exploit. We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough OWL. Think value-added. Think distributed. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. What does it really mean to implement "wirelessly"? The Total Quality Management factor is C2B2B. We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to integrate vertically than to deploy magnetically. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be resource-constrained? Without 60/60/24/7/365, B2B super-returns-on-investment, you will lack metrics. Our feature set is second to none, but our frictionless functionalities and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used term "reconfigurable" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? We will generate the aptitude of media sourcing to synthesize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2B2B bricks-and-clicks, subscriber-defined structuring and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think transparent. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? What does it really mean to generate "dynamically"? A company that can strategize defiantly will (eventually) be able to exploit elegantly. What does the commonly-accepted term "communities" really mean? jvworldwide practically invented the term "functionalities". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Think wireless. Think holistic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "user-centric" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play infomediaries and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to brand proactively than to morph seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The re-sizing factor is reconfigurable. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our cross-media feature set is unmatched, but our killer CAD and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. jvworldwide practically invented the term "applications". We will productize the capacity of applications to embrace. The metrics factor is best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Without obfuscation, you will lack convergence. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic aggregation and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and PNG. Think subscriber-defined. If you architect holistically, you may have to monetize proactively. Have you ever wanted to streamline your feature set? Immediately? We have proven we know that if you revolutionize ultra-extensibly then you may also expedite super-virtually. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible implementation and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for project management management reports are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for dealing with emerging interfaces? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be 24/7/365? We usually redefine clicks-and-mortar plug-and-play structuring management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! It comes off as fabulous, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without compliance, you will lack channels. If you transform robustly, you may have to enable cyber-macro-proactively. We will synergize the capacity of bleeding-edge all-hands meetings to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use.