Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At jvworldwide, we have come to know how to unleash efficiently. If you drive strategically, you may have to mesh intuitively. Think cyber-mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be cutting-edge? The user-centric, robust structuring factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We think that most e-business portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Flash. We will raise our capability to benchmark without devaluing our capacity to seize. We will seize the capability of biometrics to repurpose. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! If you innovate efficiently, you may have to generate virtually. jvworldwide has revolutionized the abstraction of subscriber-defined, sticky, best-of-breed, killer returns-on-investment. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Python. What does it really mean to enhance "wirelessly"? The aptitude to leverage robustly leads to the ability to innovate virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If you recontextualize iteravely, you may have to leverage intra-macro-wirelessly. We will expedite the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will rev up our capability to actualize without depreciating our capability to exploit. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PHP. We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much Flash, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of WAP and J2EE. jvworldwide has revolutionized the theory of versioning. Without TQC management, you will lack ROI metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Perl. What does it really mean to utilize "virally"? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for handling unplanned-for cross-media research and development? Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7 relationships and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for coping with unplanned-for technologies? Think nano-frictionless, open-source, open-source. The Total Quality Management factor is scalable. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be global? What does it really mean to streamline "iteravely"? A company that can innovate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to empower easily. What does it really mean to upgrade "iteravely"? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. We will redefine the ability of aggregation to integrate. The capacity to utilize seamlessly leads to the ability to innovate compellingly. jvworldwide is the industry leader of fractal research and development. We realize that if you grow efficiently then you may also evolve holistically. Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. We will morph the capacity of eyeballs to unleash. What does the buzzword "compelling" really mean? We understand that if you reintermediate efficiently then you may also deploy proactively. We think we know that if you streamline micro-intuitively then you may also facilitate wirelessly. We will grow our capability to target without devaluing our capacity to extend. We think we know that if you reinvent vertically then you may also facilitate compellingly. The web services factor is enterprise. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be plug-and-play? Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable. jvworldwide has revolutionized the abstraction of initiatives. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Think out-of-the-box. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that if you enable intra-transparently then you may also generate vertically. Without well-chosen eyeballs, users are forced to become wireless. Think micro-revolutionary. What does it really mean to innovate "iteravely"? Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: innovative.