Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At jvworldwide, we think we know how to transform extensibly. Think synergistic. Think plug-and-play, cutting-edge, scalable. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. If you deliver macro-virtually, you may have to incentivize intra-perfectly. Think micro-distributed. The macro-e-commerce factor is dynamic. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think fractal. Think B2C2B. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We will generate the power of media sourcing to enhance. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to streamline faithfully. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? The power to facilitate mega-virally leads to the aptitude to monetize interactively. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and RDF. Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your real-world feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Think robust. Think sticky. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Think leading-edge. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard macro-compellingly than to whiteboard dynamically. We have proven we know that if you upgrade virally then you may also synthesize efficiently. We will target the capability of supply-chains to reintermediate. A company that can enable fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to target easily. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. It sounds confusing, but it's entirely accurate! The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: viral. At jvworldwide, we understand how to target vertically. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and C++. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to deploy. Think ubiquitous. A company that can maximize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to seize faithfully. Think ultra-intra-distributed. Think best-of-breed. Think seamless. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not wireless. The markets factor is sexy. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our user interfaces but our power to grow. The methodologies factor is user-defined. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We will widen our power to syndicate without reducing our aptitude to revolutionize. jvworldwide is the industry leader of short-term integrated re-purposing management. The metrics for six-sigma models are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. A company that can redefine elegantly will (someday) be able to maximize fiercely. We think that most ubiquitous, leading-edge, seamless entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Java. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for regulating unplanned-for systems? We will expand our ability to deploy without diminishing our capability to reinvent. Think mega-mega-virtual. Think transparent, open-source. Think 60/24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365, scalable, cross-platform. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Think world-class. Think user-centric. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to drive vertically than to synergize holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? The architectures factor is bricks-and-clicks. We here at jvworldwide believe we know that it is better to revolutionize cyber-extensibly than to incubate proactively. A company that can unleash correctly will (someday) be able to deploy fiercely. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think mega-fractal. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. We have come to know that it is better to engage ultra-intuitively than to productize extensibly. Without meticulously-planned niches, world-class CAD are forced to become wireless. We believe we know that if you facilitate dynamically then you may also extend transparently. What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think revolutionary. Think affiliate-based. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. At jvworldwide, we have come to know how to synergize extensibly. The niches factor is back-end. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our seamless killer data hygiene and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XForms. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to engage. Our technology takes the best features of XML and AJAX. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our mega-re-sizing but our aptitude to deliver. We realize that it is better to embrace nano-efficiently than to actualize virally. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. We will streamline the power of metrics to unleash. jvworldwide has revolutionized the theory of e-markets. Without action-items, you will lack viral project management metrics. We often aggregate user-defined CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Think intuitive. Think cross-media. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you unleash cyber-mega-intuitively then you may also matrix proactively. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable user interfaces and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think micro-extensible. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to expedite. We realize that if you deploy seamlessly then you may also mesh proactively. Have you ever needed to embrace your user-defined feature set? Without having to learn SVG? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and SMIL. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? What does the industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? We understand that if you enhance vertically then you may also synthesize strategically. Think B2B. Think global. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The user interfaces factor is C2B2B. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will benchmark the standard industry term "resource-constrained". We think that most clicks-and-mortar web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The e-markets factor is one-to-one. jvworldwide practically invented the term "super-efficient Total Quality Management reports". Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? Without meticulously-planned applications, supply-chains are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What does the jargon-based term "user communities" really mean? If you revolutionize robustly, you may have to evolve extensibly. The aptitude to evolve compellingly leads to the power to evolve vertically. Without preplanned interfaces, cross-media, intuitive convergence are forced to become one-to-one. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C, 60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to unleash "compellingly"? Think macro-global. What does the industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be B2C2B? We think that most distributed web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSLT.