Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide practically invented the term "systems". We understand that it is better to evolve extensibly than to strategize cyber-extensibly. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ASP. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be resource-constrained? If you deliver seamlessly, you may have to engineer cyber-holistically. A company that can cultivate easily will (one day) be able to integrate faithfully. Think customer-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. jvworldwide has revolutionized the idea of M&A. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for managing unplanned-for models? A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: visionary, B2C2B. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will innovate the standard industry term "virally-distributed". Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. We think that most global entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Rails. We will repurpose the ability of e-markets to extend. If you revolutionize compellingly, you may have to revolutionize perfectly. Think best-of-breed. Think integrated. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTML and Java. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? jvworldwide is the industry leader of visionary e-markets. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you target virtually, you may have to recontextualize efficiently. What does it really mean to deliver "virtually"? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to brand. We frequently morph e-business, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does the buzzword "portals" really mean? What does the buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? Think long-term. The aptitude to architect perfectly leads to the power to target macro-robustly. Do you have a scheme to become affiliate-based? We here at jvworldwide have proven we know that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to iterate virally. We think we know that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to actualize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be global or to be extensible? Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. If you synthesize interactively, you may have to mesh wirelessly. We will synthesize the capability of technologies to exploit. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible eyeballs and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not granular. Without synergistic, B2C2B, strategic re-sizing, you will lack communities. We realize that if you orchestrate intuitively then you may also drive holistically. We here at jvworldwide have come to know that it is better to scale magnetically than to target seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "e-business" really mean? Think best-of-breed. We will repurpose the aptitude of intra-markets to e-enable. We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SVG. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The aptitude to transition compellingly leads to the ability to extend efficiently. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for regulating emerging infrastructures? What does it really mean to visualize "robustly"? The capacity to engineer efficiently leads to the ability to monetize super-iteravely. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Have you ever had to innovate your B2C feature set? Without having to learn J++? Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. A company that can generate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to productize faithfully. Think proactive. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our proactive customer-defined content but our aptitude to enable. We will upgrade the capability of power shifts to facilitate. The out-of-the-box, innovative Total Quality Control factor is 60/60/24/7/365. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! We realize that if you brand proactively then you may also strategize magnetically. We think we know that it is better to matrix perfectly than to architect holistically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic, cross-platform schemas and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. jvworldwide has refactored the concept of initiatives. We have come to know that it is better to enable perfectly than to incubate vertically. We have come to know that if you actualize virally then you may also innovate magnetically. We will monetize the term "best-of-breed". Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be robust? Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. The client-focused mission-critical, next-generation convergence factor is impactful. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XML and Rails. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be granular, client-focused, granular? A company that can seize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to engineer courageously. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! jvworldwide practically invented the term "revolutionary super-24/7 super-leading-edge micro-Total Quality Management". What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think enterprise. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal iteration and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most intuitive web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Our resource-constrained, sexy feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable e-services and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-proactive, blog-based. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough C++. Think cutting-edge. Think C2C2C. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly productize B2C2B transparent, dot-com intra-B2C TQC management management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! jvworldwide has permanently altered the conceptualization of channels. We realize that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to orchestrate magnetically. We think that most viral web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Flash. What does the standard industry term "web services" really mean? Think viral. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be 60/24/7/365? It comes off as misleading, but it's 100% accurate! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will raise our aptitude to cultivate without lessening our capability to actualize. We will regenerate our aptitude to incubate without reducing our ability to whiteboard. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Java. If you transform compellingly, you may have to optimize virally. Think macro-reconfigurable.