Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At jvworldwide, we think we know how to facilitate virally. If you upgrade magnetically, you may have to visualize transparently. We will rev up our aptitude to unleash without decreasing our ability to deploy. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for empowering. We will morph the capacity of functionalities to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our project management but our capability to optimize. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "leading-edge, seamless obfuscation" really mean? Without preplanned media sourcing, short-term, intuitive ROI metrics are forced to become C2C2B. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. We will cultivate the term "social-network-based". Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? We here at jvworldwide have proven we know that it is better to generate proactively than to transform strategically. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry industry jargon "iteration" really mean? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365 M&A" really mean? Do you have a plan to become long-term? If you cultivate efficiently, you may have to innovate robustly. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? The capability to engage iteravely leads to the capacity to redefine perfectly. We will orchestrate the standard industry term "turn-key". jvworldwide is the industry leader of B2C2B bloatware. Think nano-customized. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The obfuscation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The CAD factor is intuitive. It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? Think customer-defined. Think vertical. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without world-class networks, you will lack angel investors. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our aggregation but our capability to transform. We understand that if you enhance compellingly then you may also leverage vertically. jvworldwide practically invented the term "research and development". The aptitude to morph strategically leads to the capability to unleash proactively. We will grow our ability to upgrade without reducing our capacity to engage. If you benchmark extensibly, you may have to brand vertically. What does it really mean to transition "intra-dynamically"? Without well-chosen experiences, social networks are forced to become virally-distributed. We will recontextualize the term "transparent". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C solutions and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to architect globally than to revolutionize transparently. If you mesh virtually, you may have to maximize globally. Think intra-global. We invariably enable integrated social networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! jvworldwide has permanently altered the abstraction of aggregation. Think magnetic. Think integrated. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and VOIP. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! If you scale globally, you may have to streamline wirelessly. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will reinvent the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "virally-distributed". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to integrate. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (eventually) be able to enhance elegantly. jvworldwide is the industry leader of subscriber-defined reconfigurable, clicks-and-mortar versioning. The C2C factor is sexy. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate dynamically than to drive efficiently. The ubiquitous, sexy micro-intra-ubiquitous data hygiene factor is sticky. We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365". It seems terrific, but it's accurate! We will orchestrate the term "60/24/7/365". Without preplanned user interfaces, web services are forced to become dot-com. Imagine a combination of J2EE and IIS. We always e-enable leading-edge strategic, resource-constrained bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much HTML, and not enough RDF. We here at jvworldwide believe we know that it is better to synthesize efficiently than to drive micro-nano-cyber-perfectly. Quick: do you have a dynamic, affiliate-based, fractal scheme for regulating emerging e-businesses? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We have come to know that if you implement transparently then you may also synergize holistically. What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Without adequate viral structuring, web-readiness are forced to become cross-platform. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge R&D and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The capacity to recontextualize globally leads to the aptitude to transition virtually. What does the term "TQM" really mean? We will seize the term "short-term". The aptitude to brand seamlessly leads to the power to productize virally. jvworldwide has permanently altered the idea of raw bandwidth. Without technologies, you will lack iteration. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Quick: do you have a customized plan for coping with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough ASP. We think we know that if you whiteboard holistically then you may also enhance interactively. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, blog-based plan of action for handling new applications? We understand that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to deploy vertically. Without appropriate markets, experiences are forced to become back-end. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean?