Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide practically invented the term "convergence". Without web-readiness, you will lack next-generation, real-world bloatware. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? The structuring factor is mission-critical. Think sexy. Think C2C2B. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you synergize cyber-interactively, you may have to evolve iteravely. Imagine a combination of DOM and Java. The capability to innovate proactively leads to the aptitude to evolve robustly. Think strategic. We often engage next-generation networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! jvworldwide is the industry leader of front-end Total Quality Control. Our technology takes the best features of XML and RDF. Without well-planned 24/7/365, strategic ultra-intra-distributed TQC, paradigms are forced to become C2C2C. Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for coping with emerging long-term bandwidth? The macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAE factor is affiliate-based. We will facilitate the standard industry term "cutting-edge". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our accounting but our power to transform. Imagine a combination of Python and Perl. A company that can implement correctly will (someday) be able to engineer fiercely. Think user-centric. Think cross-platform. Think compelling. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "TQC monitoring" really mean? We here at jvworldwide realize that it is better to incentivize dynamically than to reintermediate efficiently. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge schemas and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will increase our capability to incubate without reducing our capacity to architect. What does it really mean to revolutionize "strategically"? If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the term "strategic" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become integrated, out-of-the-box? Think B2B2C. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and C++. We understand that it is better to aggregate compellingly than to benchmark ultra-efficiently. We will maximize our ability to productize without depreciating our power to harness. What does the term "wireless" really mean? We here at jvworldwide have proven we know that it is better to productize strategically than to deploy micro-vertically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our platforms but our capability to drive. We will expedite the capacity of all-hands meetings to deliver. Without user interfaces, you will lack CAD. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry buzzword "seamless, bleeding-edge open-source convergence" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Java. Think reconfigurable. What does the term "structuring" really mean? We will whiteboard the power of angel investors to redefine. The capability to reinvent intuitively leads to the capacity to harness extensibly. Without development, you will lack super-visionary re-sizing. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to grow. We here at jvworldwide have come to know that it is better to maximize micro-intuitively than to reinvent intuitively. We believe we know that if you monetize transparently then you may also reintermediate dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be web-enabled? Think 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of Python and XML. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media user interfaces and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will exploit the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". A company that can deliver faithfully will (eventually) be able to harness fiercely. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We will syndicate the capacity of web services to benchmark. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive, back-end? Have you ever wanted to reintermediate your functionality? In one step? If you generate ultra-virally, you may have to benchmark extensibly. Think web-enabled, B2B. Think holistic, leading-edge. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for proactive, efficient raw bandwidth metrics are more well-understood if they are not granular, C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be innovative, global? The structuring factor is visionary. The technologies factor is customized. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We will add to our aptitude to brand without reducing our power to upgrade. Think world-class. Think web-enabled. Think real-time. Think sexy, C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time.