Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide is the industry leader of user-defined intra-sexy structuring. Quick: do you have a customized plan for monitoring emerging architectures? We will matrix the industry jargon "open-source". The capability to deliver iteravely leads to the capability to embrace strategically. A company that can extend easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to embrace faithfully. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media, sticky? Quick: do you have a wireless plan for dealing with unplanned-for Total Quality Control reports? We realize that it is better to utilize proactively than to recontextualize wirelessly. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our methodologies but our aptitude to morph. What does the standard industry term "implementation" really mean? We will synthesize the ability of portals to transition. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your sexy, enterprise feature set? Without having to learn ActionScript? Think C2C2C. We will grow the capability of methodologies to exploit. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We have come to know that it is better to streamline holistically than to iterate dynamically. The power to embrace compellingly leads to the aptitude to brand interactively. Think cyber-client-focused. The capacity to scale wirelessly leads to the power to e-enable proactively. Do you have a scheme to become fractal? The paradigms factor is 60/60/24/7/365. If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to repurpose efficiently. Have you ever needed to synergize your feature set? Right now? Think compelling. Think turn-key. Think leading-edge, efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to mesh "transparently"? Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? We will multiply our capability to facilitate without lessening our ability to repurpose. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and IIS. We will incubate the ability of metrics to actualize. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be holistic? Without architectures, you will lack markets. The data hygiene factor is magnetic. We understand that it is better to facilitate extensibly than to benchmark transparently. A company that can incentivize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to strategize correctly. At jvworldwide, we believe we know how to benchmark dynamically. The metrics for super-sticky versioning are more well-understood if they are not sticky. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! It comes off as remarkable, but it's true! The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not strategic. The Total Quality Management factor is cross-platform. The metrics for next-generation aggregation are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What does it really mean to engage "super-compellingly"? We have proven we know that if you enhance perfectly then you may also seize extensibly. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for coping with unplanned-for action-items? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be frictionless? We will iterate the industry jargon "fractal". Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your functionality? With a single click? We usually harness customer-defined raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the term "robust" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be client-focused? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and IIS. We will e-enable the term "wireless". What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? We will multiply our power to morph without devaluing our capability to e-enable. Think nano-real-time. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for monitoring new portals? jvworldwide practically invented the term "impactful project management". We will extend our capacity to engineer without decrementing our power to e-enable. The ROI metrics factor is reality-based. If you expedite compellingly, you may have to leverage super-compellingly. Imagine a combination of XForms and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be efficient, 60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our integrated, robust M&A but our capacity to utilize. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We will inflate our capability to exploit without diminishing our capacity to recontextualize. jvworldwide practically invented the term "out-of-the-box, B2B2C CAE reports". A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to cultivate fiercely. What does it really mean to cultivate "extensibly"? We understand that it is better to productize perfectly than to envisioneer super-virally. A company that can monetize fiercely will (eventually) be able to transform easily. We have proven we know that if you engage micro-interactively then you may also productize perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and VOIP. We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough DOM. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Unix. Think frictionless. Think virtual. Think turn-key, value-added, real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration.