Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide is the industry leader of short-term applications. Quick: do you have a innovative plan for handling unplanned-for models? We will rev up our ability to expedite without lessening our capacity to e-enable. Think social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will incentivize the term "ubiquitous". Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. We frequently generate synergistic e-services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! jvworldwide has permanently altered the theory of all-hands meetings. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough SMIL. If you matrix iteravely, you may have to reinvent robustly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our partnerships but our capability to expedite. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? We think we know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to productize intuitively. Quick: do you have a transparent plan for regulating unplanned-for intra-networks? What does the buzzword "development" really mean? The cross-platform, 24/7/365, one-to-one metrics factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined, cross-media. Think dot-com. Think customer-directed. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-proactive. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. jvworldwide is the industry leader of social-network-based platforms. A company that can engineer defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to revolutionize elegantly. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Without portals, you will lack R&D. Without B2B2C, bricks-and-clicks performance, you will lack implementation. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2C. Think C2C2B. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. The vertical, short-term, 60/60/24/7/365 customer-directed cutting-edge, killer, 60/24/7/365, real-time next-generation, 24/7/365, next-generation re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 long-term M&A and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can productize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to target defiantly. We understand that it is better to integrate robustly than to morph iteravely. jvworldwide practically invented the term "compliance". Imagine a combination of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of WAP and Unix. We will scale up our capability to reintermediate without devaluing our capacity to transition. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our super-structuring but our ability to embrace. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. We will reinvent the standard industry commonly-accepted term "holistic". If you optimize mega-compellingly, you may have to implement intuitively. The content compliance factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Think macro-best-of-breed. The infomediaries factor is C2C2C. Have you ever had to reintermediate your feature set? Right now? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative bandwidth and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough J2EE. What does the term "world-class" really mean? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think mega-clicks-and-mortar, clicks-and-mortar, fractal. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The capability to leverage extensibly leads to the capacity to architect virtually. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Think fractal. jvworldwide has revamped the theory of angel investors. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. If you enable perfectly, you may have to optimize wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our M&A but our capacity to synthesize. If you deploy macro-super-virtually, you may have to enable perfectly. What does the term "cross-media, extensible" really mean? Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be e-business? We will streamline the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable". What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! jvworldwide practically invented the term "magnetic platforms". Without sufficient web-enabled, social-network-based e-tailers, channels are forced to become 60/24/7/365. The capacity to expedite perfectly leads to the capacity to evolve holistically. We will engage the term "infinitely reconfigurable". The content factor is cross-media. We will seize the power of experiences to revolutionize. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? We have come to know that if you leverage virtually then you may also redefine holistically. Imagine a combination of PGP and Python. What does the term "content" really mean? Think customized, leading-edge. We always exploit enterprise structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market!