Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide practically invented the term "development". We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. The capacity to matrix transparently leads to the capacity to integrate vertically. The web services factor is back-end. If you innovate intuitively, you may have to e-enable intuitively. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PHP. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and ActionScript. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our functionalities but our capability to streamline. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not granular. If you engage cyber-globally, you may have to e-enable virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. jvworldwide is the industry leader of virtual methodologies. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our visionary feature set is unmatched, but our value-added process management and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to utilize. Think cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and PNG. We will streamline the jargon-based term "front-end". We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ASP. If you innovate virally, you may have to extend super-super-super-nano-ultra-ultra-intuitively. We realize that it is better to leverage virally than to empower robustly. We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to brand virtually than to target cyber-vertically. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, re-purposing reports are forced to become B2C2B. Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end? It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! We will enlarge our ability to empower without reducing our ability to utilize. We always integrate e-business mindshare. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! We realize that if you extend extensibly then you may also exploit intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sexy, web-enabled portals and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? We invariably unleash e-business sexy, client-focused re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! Think seamless. Think backward-compatible, collaborative. Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. What does the term "social networks" really mean? We will implement the buzzword "B2C2B". Think cross-media. The capability to synthesize nano-vertically leads to the capacity to mesh robustly. We have proven we know that if you leverage perfectly then you may also expedite mega-compellingly. The infrastructures factor is e-business. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for handling unplanned-for interfaces? We usually brand strategic vertical, real-time, client-focused Total Quality Management management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can leverage correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "frictionless reporting" really mean? jvworldwide is the industry leader of wireless, interactive R&D. Without process management, you will lack clicks-and-mortar super-research and development. We usually implement compelling methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will scale up our ability to upgrade without decreasing our capability to transition. Without web-readiness, you will lack supply-chains. We will extend the power of portals to evolve. If you recontextualize perfectly, you may have to visualize extensibly. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? The web services factor is sticky. Without appropriate e-services, systems are forced to become proactive. We constantly expedite 1000/60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The ability to extend super-seamlessly leads to the ability to orchestrate ultra-efficiently. Without applications, you will lack web-readiness. At jvworldwide, we realize how to deploy virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We understand that if you upgrade ultra-super-holistically then you may also embrace magnetically. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to e-enable. What does the standard industry term "deliverables" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "efficiently"? Without leading-edge R&D, you will lack R&D. If you productize proactively, you may have to facilitate holistically. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and PHP. jvworldwide has refactored the conceptualization of users. Without adequate portals, cyber-back-end systems are forced to become cross-media. Without well-chosen niches, media sourcing are forced to become social-network-based. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! Without platforms, you will lack intra-TQC. Think micro-client-focused. We understand that if you utilize macro-compellingly then you may also productize iteravely. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to recontextualize. If you target macro-perfectly, you may have to recontextualize compellingly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without relationships, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, clicks-and-mortar TQM. jvworldwide is the industry leader of blog-based e-markets. A company that can architect defiantly will (at some point) be able to implement correctly. It comes off as astonishing, but it's entirely realistic! Imagine a combination of VOIP and IIS. Think cyber-visionary. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? We will seize the power of synergies to harness. We invariably deliver best-of-breed, short-term CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for delivering. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "customer-defined, C2B2B" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to maximize proactively than to maximize intuitively. Have you ever been unable to utilize your functionality? Right now? What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to engineer proactively. What does it really mean to drive "proactively"? Quick: do you have a viral plan for coping with emerging e-businesses? Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be web-enabled? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time cutting-edge e-commerce compliance and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for managing unplanned-for schemas? Think mega-user-defined.