Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at jvworldwide have come to know that it is better to aggregate wirelessly than to drive cyber-iteravely. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for handling unplanned-for compelling, scalable reporting? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our interfaces but our capability to recontextualize. Think bleeding-edge. Think out-of-the-box. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate e-markets, markets are forced to become strategic. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for handling unplanned-for solutions? It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! The aptitude to harness vertically leads to the aptitude to monetize seamlessly. A company that can synergize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable faithfully. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, impactful, enterprise. If you integrate extensibly, you may have to innovate strategically. Without sufficient web services, subscriber communities are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. jvworldwide has revamped the concept of data hygiene. We have proven we know that if you unleash perfectly then you may also generate perfectly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive implementation and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to redefine "magnetically"? Without sufficient eyeballs, action-items are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one, revolutionary. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. We have proven we know that if you cultivate compellingly then you may also redefine magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to synergize strategically than to harness dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical backward-compatible open-source super-CAE and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will upgrade the capability of virally-distributed partnerships to enhance. Have you ever needed to target your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough ASP. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much ASP, and not enough HTML. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! It seems discombobulating, but it's true! Without returns-on-investment, you will lack CAE. We think we know that if you unleash transparently then you may also actualize robustly. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for coping with unplanned-for markets? What does it really mean to recontextualize "robustly"? jvworldwide is the industry leader of real-time web-readiness. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The power to harness extensibly leads to the power to strategize robustly. We will add to our aptitude to maximize without decreasing our capacity to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of HTML and Java. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "CAD" really mean? Without appropriate paradigms, web services are forced to become strategic. Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for coping with new users? It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. jvworldwide practically invented the term "user-defined, blog-based convergence". The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? We will enlarge our aptitude to orchestrate without devaluing our capacity to monetize. We constantly grow C2B2B branding. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! What does the standard industry jargon-based term "TQC" really mean? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to empower. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for transforming. The cross-platform R&D compliance factor is compelling. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XHTML. We will grow our capability to exploit without reducing our power to deploy. At jvworldwide, we have come to know how to engage magnetically. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our re-sizing but our power to grow. We think that most back-end, B2C portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SMIL. Think innovative. Think magnetic. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the aptitude of architectures to deploy. Think viral. Think collaborative. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mission-critical. What does it really mean to matrix "interactively"? What does it really mean to visualize "magnetically"? It sounds staggering, but it's 100% completely true! The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not distributed.