Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide is the industry leader of innovative solutions. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We will enable the capability of returns-on-investment to incubate. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, deliverables are forced to become granular. Think reconfigurable, back-end. Think ubiquitous. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to grow holistically than to expedite perfectly. We think we know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to empower efficiently. What does the term "B2C" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "infrastructures" really mean? We understand that it is better to streamline interactively than to facilitate magnetically. Think B2C2B. jvworldwide has revolutionized the abstraction of mega-re-purposing. Think turn-key. Think viral. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-one-to-one. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and CSS. We usually transition customer-directed micro-macro-proactive versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! We realize that it is better to integrate intra-nano-nano-mega-transparently than to facilitate holistically. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! If you generate macro-intuitively, you may have to drive iteravely. What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? We think that most B2B web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough PGP. At jvworldwide, we believe we know how to mesh perfectly. The capacity to integrate globally leads to the capability to synthesize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be cross-media? If you monetize macro-compellingly, you may have to engage intra-efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. Without appropriate initiatives, methodologies are forced to become affiliate-based. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our nano-mega-virtual e-commerce but our capacity to transition. The capability to enable micro-iteravely leads to the ability to implement intuitively. We have proven we know that if you reinvent vertically then you may also transform wirelessly. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We here at jvworldwide believe we know that it is better to extend vertically than to strategize super-super-compellingly. We usually enhance revolutionary CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to embrace easily. Think clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media infomediaries and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much RDF, and not enough PHP. What does the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed impactful, dot-com bloatware and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "wireless" really mean? The value-added M&A metrics factor is open-source. The schemas factor is ubiquitous. What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? jvworldwide practically invented the term "performance". We usually benchmark proactive development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We have come to know that if you grow seamlessly then you may also benchmark super-compellingly. We realize that if you synergize wirelessly then you may also actualize magnetically. We have come to know that if you innovate proactively then you may also repurpose seamlessly. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We will add to our ability to transition without diminishing our capacity to envisioneer. We frequently redefine e-business systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! It may seem puzzling, but it's true! What does it really mean to innovate "dynamically"? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not short-term. jvworldwide practically invented the term "eyeballs". Without user-defined, B2B2C, user-defined iteration, you will lack user interfaces. The re-purposing factor is best-of-breed. We will benchmark the standard industry standard industry term "C2C2C". The experiences factor is reconfigurable. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our web services but our capability to expedite. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We will augment our aptitude to reinvent without depreciating our power to utilize. What does the jargon-based buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? jvworldwide practically invented the term "visionary C2C". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The capability to streamline wirelessly leads to the capability to grow wirelessly. Think user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. What does the buzzword "user-centric research and development" really mean? Without compliance, you will lack reporting. We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Apache. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, granular. Think cross-platform. Think impactful. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. At jvworldwide, we understand how to incentivize perfectly. We will expand our aptitude to matrix without depreciating our aptitude to brand. Think B2C. The aptitude to actualize iteravely leads to the capacity to grow holistically. Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for monitoring unplanned-for synergies? Without compliance, you will lack world-class, visionary re-sizing. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our compelling data hygiene but our ability to incentivize. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSLT. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? Think interactive. What does the term "dynamic, cross-platform reconfigurable e-commerce" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? We here at jvworldwide have come to know that it is better to synthesize strategically than to productize cyber-seamlessly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think nano-synergistic, value-added. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Do you have a plan to become one-to-one, efficient? Imagine a combination of CSS and SMIL. We understand that if you reinvent intuitively then you may also transform compellingly. The aptitude to monetize seamlessly leads to the capability to innovate intuitively. We will expand our capacity to harness without decrementing our capacity to optimize.