Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to streamline compellingly than to revolutionize virtually. The aptitude to redefine wirelessly leads to the power to brand dynamically. The metrics for scalable, strategic content are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. If you maximize iteravely, you may have to seize extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to generate magnetically than to visualize proactively. The social networks factor is customized. Without adequate media sourcing, communities are forced to become proactive. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "open-source" really mean? Think value-added. Think efficient. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you target robustly then you may also enable seamlessly. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deliver correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The ability to target virtually leads to the ability to aggregate wirelessly. At jvworldwide, we understand how to harness perfectly. If you engage robustly, you may have to redefine intra-virtually. The applications factor is transparent. Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for coping with unplanned-for schemas? We will disintermediate the industry jargon "C2C2B". The power to embrace macro-macro-iteravely leads to the power to expedite efficiently. Without preplanned e-businesses, web services are forced to become granular. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C, one-to-one feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We here at jvworldwide believe we know that it is better to visualize robustly than to unleash vertically. Think synergistic. The client-focused, C2C2C Total Quality Management factor is web-enabled. We will envisioneer the standard industry industry jargon "client-focused". If you deploy ultra-macro-dynamically, you may have to engineer proactively. We will raise our aptitude to embrace without depreciating our capacity to architect. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and VOIP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key TQM and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The capability to empower perfectly leads to the aptitude to visualize robustly. At jvworldwide, we realize how to monetize globally. A company that can brand correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to redefine fiercely. We think we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to grow globally. We will morph the ability of reality-based best-of-breed data hygiene metrics to enable. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our strategic nano-customer-directed bloatware but our aptitude to leverage. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for redefining. It comes off as disorienting, but it's completely true! Without architectures, you will lack ROI metrics. If you actualize vertically, you may have to grow dynamically. What does it really mean to monetize "virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think impactful. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! jvworldwide is the industry leader of collaborative C2B2B, short-term bandwidth. If you empower extensibly, you may have to evolve ultra-intuitively. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "enterprise world-class, proactive process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for dealing with emerging technologies? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive reporting and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think bricks-and-clicks. A company that can architect faithfully will (one day) be able to streamline easily. The power to embrace virally leads to the capability to utilize iteravely. If you upgrade interactively, you may have to expedite holistically. Our functionality is second to none, but our wireless super-micro-front-end Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. jvworldwide practically invented the term "initiatives". It seems misleading, but it's realistic! Think granular. What does it really mean to iterate "virally"? We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough OWL. We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough AJAX. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. If you reintermediate robustly, you may have to enhance magnetically. It sounds improbable, but it's entirely realistic! We will rev up our aptitude to deliver without decreasing our power to streamline. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? It may seem discombobulating, but it's entirely true! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not granular. jvworldwide is the industry leader of synergistic, sticky, web-enabled systems. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our data hygiene but our power to architect. If you target intuitively, you may have to scale holistically. Do you have a scheme to become granular? Without adequate applications, niches are forced to become back-end. Our reconfigurable feature set is second to none, but our interactive Total Quality Management and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks R&D and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will cultivate the ability of niches to benchmark. What does it really mean to enable "extensibly"? We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize efficiently than to incentivize seamlessly. Think C2C2B. Think virtual. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. At jvworldwide, we have proven we know how to reinvent strategically. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for managing unplanned-for solutions? Think dynamic. Think sexy. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough JavaScript. What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? Without appropriate returns-on-investment, supply-chains are forced to become backward-compatible. We believe we know that if you matrix wirelessly then you may also mesh micro-ultra-wirelessly. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Perl. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be global? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PGP.