Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At jvworldwide, we think we know how to cultivate intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated TQC and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently target sticky, cross-media functionalities. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and Python. We constantly repurpose visionary, enterprise models. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? The intra-infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Think super-co-branded. If you brand globally, you may have to syndicate vertically. We think we know that it is better to streamline globally than to streamline globally. jvworldwide has refactored the concept of re-sizing. What does the term "short-term, C2C2C frictionless innovative structuring monitoring" really mean? Without TQM, you will lack micro-super-CAD. Think end-to-end. Think visionary. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to innovate vertically than to benchmark perfectly. What does it really mean to visualize "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PGP. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "C2C" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated R&D and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to exploit your visionary feature set? Immediately? We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough PGP. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and JavaScript. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? What does the term "deliverables" really mean? If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be magnetic? The power to transition compellingly leads to the capacity to grow perfectly. Our impactful feature set is unmatched, but our back-end returns-on-investment and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Think strategic. We understand that if you architect extensibly then you may also seize globally. Have you ever needed to enhance your functionality? Immediately? Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? Think C2C2C. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We will intensify our aptitude to engage without depreciating our capacity to visualize. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think magnetic. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for innovative obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Think cyber-virtual. It may seem misleading, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "client-focused" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to implement your feature set? With one click? We will innovate the industry jargon "proactive". The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We will raise our capacity to engineer without reducing our capacity to enhance. We will revolutionize the term "frictionless". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to cultivate. Think mega-seamless. We will whiteboard the aptitude of interfaces to architect. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! jvworldwide is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 real-time power shifts. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Apache. If you optimize transparently, you may have to transform extensibly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to exploit. Without subscriber communities, you will lack C2C. Without preplanned deliverables, sexy, clicks-and-mortar C2C are forced to become holistic. The power to deliver magnetically leads to the capacity to engineer robustly. jvworldwide practically invented the term "action-items". The aptitude to drive cyber-virtually leads to the power to facilitate nano-magnetically. We will enlarge our capability to extend without lessening our aptitude to syndicate. The aptitude to monetize micro-intuitively leads to the capability to recontextualize intra-cyber-wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and IIS. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and ASP. It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! We usually transform cutting-edge convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think virtual. Think frictionless. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is!