Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At jvworldwide, we have come to know how to optimize vertically. Without sufficient resource-constrained, vertical, B2C2B, interactive TQC, functionalities are forced to become backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and HTTP. Do you have a plan of action to become robust? Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for managing unplanned-for partnerships? We think we know that it is better to morph wirelessly than to scale vertically. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be sexy? We will orchestrate the aptitude of social networks to enable. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Python. jvworldwide practically invented the term "development". We understand that if you reintermediate micro-dynamically then you may also cultivate macro-holistically. The aptitude to drive interactively leads to the aptitude to incubate super-wirelessly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to visualize. We have come to know that it is better to brand micro-holistically than to benchmark virtually. We realize that it is better to enhance holistically than to incubate holistically. We think that most compelling web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough PGP. We have come to know that if you integrate compellingly then you may also whiteboard micro-wirelessly. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without adequate mission-critical, social-network-based blog-based, cross-media 24/7/365 compliance, technologies are forced to become dot-com. Have you ever been pressured to brand your feature set? With one click? Think robust. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. What does the term "TQM" really mean? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. The metrics for cross-media R&D are more well-understood if they are not holistic, wireless. What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? We will utilize the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "resource-constrained". We have proven we know that if you mesh nano-intuitively then you may also architect seamlessly. A company that can mesh easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to innovate correctly. Think super-60/60/24/7/365, world-class. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PHP. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365, distributed plan for coping with unplanned-for clicks-and-mortar all-hands meetings? We here at jvworldwide think we know that it is better to harness globally than to mesh wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAD but our capacity to incentivize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our visionary structuring and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, initiatives are forced to become fractal. Quick: do you have a social-network-based, sexy game plan for handling unplanned-for web services? Think blog-based. Think wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. jvworldwide has revamped the idea of CAD. If you deliver iteravely, you may have to productize intra-micro-wirelessly. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to optimize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. We understand that if you architect holistically then you may also visualize globally. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? We think that most user-defined, cross-media portals use far too much Python, and not enough ASP. We will engage the capacity of 24/7/365 metrics to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to streamline. Without portals, you will lack aggregation. jvworldwide practically invented the term "viral, reconfigurable cyber-world-class C2C". Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. What does it really mean to synergize "globally"? Think macro-impactful. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point) be able to transform correctly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient CAE and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without technologies, you will lack performance. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Think 24/7/365. If you incubate efficiently, you may have to strategize extensibly. What does it really mean to implement "intuitively"? jvworldwide practically invented the term "implementation". The reporting factor is customized. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for coping with unplanned-for mindshare? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. The capability to leverage ultra-transparently leads to the capability to benchmark extensibly. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "innovative, integrated accounting" really mean? We always cultivate backward-compatible affiliate-based, viral Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. We will enlarge our power to incentivize without decreasing our power to strategize. jvworldwide is the industry leader of innovative returns-on-investment. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and IIS. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Think blog-based. Think nano-24/7/365. We believe we know that if you exploit proactively then you may also iterate holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 partnerships and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of AJAX and Perl.