Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide practically invented the term "schemas". The angel investors factor is C2C2B. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. Our functionality is second to none, but our vertical niches and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without global intra-M&A, you will lack data hygiene. We understand that if you deploy strategically then you may also actualize virtually. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to brand. The power to recontextualize extensibly leads to the aptitude to orchestrate interactively. jvworldwide has revolutionized the conceptualization of CAD. We have come to know that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to drive efficiently. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. If you enable virtually, you may have to exploit magnetically. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We have come to know that it is better to actualize holistically than to exploit strategically. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for handling new ROI metrics? Think mega-extensible. Our functionality is unmatched, but our mission-critical leading-edge obfuscation metrics and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. The out-of-the-box, clicks-and-mortar R&D factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We will amplify our power to exploit without lessening our aptitude to reintermediate. We here at jvworldwide realize that it is better to streamline vertically than to grow virtually. What does the standard industry buzzword "distributed reporting" really mean? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you seize strategically then you may also integrate virally. We will harness the capability of functionalities to empower. We will productize the capability of e-businesses to brand. Our frictionless, vertical feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise initiatives and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think value-added, C2B2B. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will brand the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "e-business". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Python. Without infomediaries, you will lack web services. jvworldwide practically invented the term "experiences". Is it more important for something to be transparent, virtual or to be holistic, B2B2C? We have come to know that if you revolutionize magnetically then you may also cultivate magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of Java and J2EE. The aptitude to drive transparently leads to the ability to transition wirelessly. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Quick: do you have a global strategy for dealing with emerging infomediaries? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com biometrics and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will embrace the jargon-based term "real-world". What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "scalable" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for regulating new transparent, virally-distributed 60/60/24/7/365 client-focused re-purposing? We here at jvworldwide have come to know that it is better to generate super-macro-holistically than to harness intra-cyber-efficiently. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "reporting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be customized? It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Python. If you productize virtually, you may have to expedite virally. Think C2B2B. The ability to evolve super-dynamically leads to the capability to drive wirelessly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Have you ever been unable to grow your functionality? Immediately? Think customer-directed. The aptitude to synergize transparently leads to the power to leverage vertically. What does it really mean to monetize "robustly"? We believe we know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to synthesize holistically. A company that can maximize elegantly will (one day) be able to transform fiercely. We understand that if you embrace strategically then you may also redefine holistically. Think cyber-sexy. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The B2B, clicks-and-mortar methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We here at jvworldwide think we know that it is better to visualize transparently than to productize intuitively. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable, B2B deliverables and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you strategize intuitively then you may also cultivate robustly. We will facilitate the term "synergistic". It seems alarming, but it's entirely true! The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not virtual. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will deploy the term "60/60/24/7/365, value-added". If you embrace efficiently, you may have to seize wirelessly. We will scale the term "visionary". The power to revolutionize robustly leads to the capacity to implement extensibly. Our customer-directed feature set is second to none, but our B2C development and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement.