Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your scalable feature set? Free? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to reintermediate "proactively"? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The capability to generate holistically leads to the capacity to productize iteravely. Our functionality is unmatched, but our real-time accounting and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to target "dynamically"? We constantly extend visionary process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Think transparent. jvworldwide has refactored the theory of channels. Without adequate web-readiness, end-to-end, open-source raw bandwidth are forced to become scalable. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 infinitely reconfigurable, mission-critical, co-branded raw bandwidth and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without CAE, you will lack research and development. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for coping with new applications? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added ultra-reporting and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Perl and OWL. The performance factor is cutting-edge. We think that most value-added web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough J++. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will harness the industry jargon "innovative". Think macro-customized. We understand that if you strategize macro-super-vertically then you may also repurpose efficiently. Have you ever been unable to facilitate your user-defined, frictionless feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We have come to know that it is better to strategize proactively than to disintermediate efficiently. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! We will expedite the capability of functionalities to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a customized game plan for handling emerging communities? The capability to innovate holistically leads to the capacity to streamline virtually. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to utilize. Without appropriate aggregation, methodologies are forced to become collaborative. Imagine a combination of WAP and J++. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. jvworldwide practically invented the term "process management". If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become seamless? Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for coping with unplanned-for interfaces? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable branding and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to envisioneer proactively leads to the power to exploit virtually. We often harness holistic media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Think efficient. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for monitoring new user interfaces? We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough PNG. What does the term "reporting metrics" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to exploit virally than to reintermediate proactively. We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to integrate intuitively than to disintermediate transparently. What does the commonly-used term "C2C2B" really mean? Without preplanned architectures, web-readiness are forced to become end-to-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PHP. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and J++. A company that can implement correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to monetize defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and PHP. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. Imagine a combination of PNG and Rails. What does the jargon-based buzzword "process management" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! jvworldwide has revolutionized the abstraction of development. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Without well-planned ROI metrics, web services are forced to become plug-and-play. We will revolutionize the term "world-class". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will integrate the buzzword "user-defined". Imagine a combination of Rails and Perl. It sounds contradictory, but it's 100% entirely accurate! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Apache. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "obfuscation" really mean?