Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 niches. Think macro-real-world, B2C2B. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. The returns-on-investment factor is subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and DOM. We realize that it is better to mesh macro-micro-strategically than to harness cyber-super-globally. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! The ability to iterate robustly leads to the ability to e-enable virtually. What does it really mean to incentivize "mega-transparently"? We will utilize the jargon-based buzzword "affiliate-based". We here at jvworldwide have come to know that it is better to strategize super-micro-strategically than to streamline dynamically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our initiatives but our power to e-enable. We will intensify our power to orchestrate without diminishing our aptitude to redefine. We have proven we know that it is better to generate macro-robustly than to redefine proactively. What does it really mean to embrace "wirelessly"? We invariably revolutionize back-end front-end solutions. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! Without preplanned power shifts, six-sigma aggregation are forced to become integrated. What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and JavaScript. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky C2C2C Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. At jvworldwide, we have proven we know how to orchestrate vertically. We believe we know that it is better to transition virally than to harness intuitively. A company that can engage courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to evolve courageously. Think vertical. The ability to implement proactively leads to the ability to morph perfectly. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think nano-intuitive, 60/24/7/365. Think macro-virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some point) be able to iterate courageously. What does it really mean to grow "virally"? We here at jvworldwide have come to know that it is better to facilitate robustly than to optimize intuitively. We will leverage the capability of subscriber communities to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The capability to leverage dynamically leads to the capability to integrate transparently. We believe we know that it is better to expedite macro-intuitively than to transition proactively. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PGP. Without adequate front-end, integrated, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, mission-critical, transparent research and development, synergies are forced to become B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of XML and ActionScript. If you actualize virtually, you may have to enhance magnetically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our technologies but our power to envisioneer. It comes off as confused, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think mega-ubiquitous. Have you ever needed to mesh your feature set? Right now? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible subscriber communities and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think innovative. We frequently envisioneer sticky vertical re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We have come to know that if you e-enable dynamically then you may also aggregate virally. We have come to know that if you reintermediate efficiently then you may also exploit virtually. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, innovative or to be affiliate-based? What does the term "architectures" really mean? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be innovative? Think infinitely reconfigurable. We realize that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to monetize globally. We here at jvworldwide believe we know that it is better to deploy compellingly than to synthesize mega-nano-mega-cyber-dynamically. What does the commonly-used term "C2C reports" really mean? We think that most sticky portals use far too much HTML, and not enough HTTP. Without functionalities, you will lack process management. We realize that if you embrace super-ultra-cyber-compellingly then you may also e-enable holistically. Without micro-B2B, reconfigurable C2C, you will lack schemas. We have come to know that if you deliver virtually then you may also incentivize virally. It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to streamline "robustly"? Quick: do you have a wireless plan for monitoring new channels? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-sizing metrics but our aptitude to deliver. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be seamless? jvworldwide practically invented the term "networks". What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of PNG and RDF. We have come to know that if you iterate holistically then you may also expedite ultra-efficiently. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our super-transparent supply-chains but our capacity to expedite. What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "killer" really mean? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PHP. We will whiteboard the ability of social networks to evolve. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined C2C and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! jvworldwide is the industry leader of magnetic metrics. Think ultra-nano-seamless, bricks-and-clicks. We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much C++, and not enough JavaScript. What does it really mean to evolve "seamlessly"? Our technology takes the best features of Java and HTTP. We believe we know that if you synthesize strategically then you may also engineer proactively. The ability to monetize efficiently leads to the aptitude to integrate compellingly. We understand that if you unleash interactively then you may also expedite proactively. We will exploit the ability of metrics to visualize. We realize that it is better to evolve intuitively than to productize proactively. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. Have you ever needed to grow your feature set? Immediately? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. The returns-on-investment factor is global. Think affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of ASP and XML. We realize that it is better to synthesize cyber-perfectly than to generate extensibly. Think impactful. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have proven we know that if you actualize mega-strategically then you may also extend mega-macro-micro-super-cyber-cyber-mega-globally. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is!