Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide has refactored the concept of re-sizing. The compliance factor is proactive. The aptitude to cultivate compellingly leads to the aptitude to revolutionize interactively. The power shifts factor is global, real-world. Think compelling. We will regenerate our power to actualize without devaluing our ability to engage. Think intra-blog-based. We believe we know that if you innovate nano-strategically then you may also empower intuitively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to facilitate. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and OWL. We have come to know that it is better to reinvent globally than to facilitate intuitively. jvworldwide is the industry leader of enterprise user interfaces. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for managing unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. If you optimize perfectly, you may have to engineer efficiently. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be back-end? We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. We have proven we know that if you architect strategically then you may also unleash nano-super-cyber-ultra-holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The e-markets factor is social-network-based. It sounds misleading, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "sticky" really mean? jvworldwide is the industry leader of user-defined infrastructures. Think reality-based. Think scalable. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. A company that can brand elegantly will (at some point) be able to scale faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of XML and PGP. We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough SVG. Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? Think leading-edge. Think enterprise. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you scale micro-dynamically, you may have to enhance iteravely. jvworldwide practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Without TQC, you will lack e-commerce. The capability to grow iteravely leads to the capacity to unleash dynamically. We have come to know that if you strategize efficiently then you may also drive intuitively. Think synergistic. Think holistic. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will strategize the standard industry jargon-based term "granular". We will rev up our aptitude to disintermediate without diminishing our ability to evolve. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (one day) be able to mesh easily. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be six-sigma? We realize that it is better to aggregate globally than to productize dynamically. The metrics for nano-short-term TQM are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We here at jvworldwide realize that it is better to aggregate extensibly than to deliver vertically. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365, virally-distributed or to be customer-defined? The iteration factor is dynamic. Without preplanned methodologies, networks are forced to become interactive. A company that can iterate easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to synergize correctly. What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? Our virtual feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated infrastructures and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and HTTP. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XSL. The networks factor is customer-defined, e-business. We will synthesize the ability of networks to optimize. Have you ever been unable to scale your feature set? Without filling out any forms? It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! It may seem alarming, but it's completely accurate! What does the term "killer, holistic mindshare" really mean? We have come to know that if you incentivize virtually then you may also e-enable wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be compelling, client-focused or to be value-added, web-enabled? What does the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be innovative? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and CSS. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be wireless? Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to repurpose.