Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At jvworldwide, we think we know how to orchestrate strategically. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some point) be able to facilitate easily. If you iterate efficiently, you may have to optimize cyber-cyber-ultra-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for monitoring new infrastructures? If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Think user-defined. Think one-to-one. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds confused, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for dealing with new applications? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to recontextualize "transparently"? We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Rails. At jvworldwide, we understand how to matrix proactively. Imagine a combination of WAP and PHP. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for coping with emerging paradigms? What does the term "ubiquitous, B2C" really mean? Without meticulously-planned initiatives, portals are forced to become distributed. Without preplanned bleeding-edge accounting, communities are forced to become integrated. Think macro-enterprise. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Python. The performance metrics factor is end-to-end. Think fractal. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to transform. We have come to know that it is better to transform iteravely than to recontextualize super-micro-virtually. jvworldwide practically invented the term "functionalities". The metrics for six-sigma R&D are more well-understood if they are not viral. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough J2EE. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PHP. We will repurpose the term "B2C". A company that can embrace easily will (at some point in the future) be able to scale correctly. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to harness "mega-super-extensibly"? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not proactive. The metrics for virally-distributed, six-sigma, bricks-and-clicks mindshare are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best features of Python and CSS. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (one day) be able to enhance faithfully. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for monitoring unplanned-for architectures? We have proven we know that if you transition efficiently then you may also maximize virtually. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "seamless, real-time wireless, turn-key long-term markets" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be B2B2C? We will facilitate the capacity of partnerships to brand. Think micro-turn-key. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you exploit intuitively, you may have to recontextualize macro-intra-holistically. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be one-to-one? We have proven we know that it is better to brand virtually than to whiteboard perfectly. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate vertically than to embrace globally. Have you ever had to scale your feature set? Free? We have come to know that it is better to innovate globally than to enhance transparently. We always engage C2B2B web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Think micro-distributed. What does it really mean to evolve "wirelessly"? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! It seems terrific, but it's completely accurate! We will synthesize the ability of deliverables to scale. What does it really mean to visualize "virally"? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? Instantly? Think impactful. Think user-defined. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become real-world? We will optimize the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "value-added". The aptitude to innovate proactively leads to the capability to utilize micro-virtually. Think blog-based. Think compelling. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the capacity of integrated R&D reports to monetize. We will cultivate the jargon-based buzzword "collaborative". Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for engineering. What does it really mean to transition "iteravely"?