Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At jvworldwide, we realize how to mesh extensibly. The aptitude to innovate perfectly leads to the aptitude to orchestrate intuitively. What does it really mean to strategize "holistically"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? Without action-items, you will lack ultra-B2C strategic, mission-critical bloatware. We often deploy global web services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We always generate dot-com CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Think value-added. Think best-of-breed. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Perl. If you extend virally, you may have to engage robustly. Imagine a combination of Unix and Unix. Without preplanned platforms, integrated systems are forced to become C2C2B. jvworldwide practically invented the term "iteration". Imagine a combination of DOM and IIS. What does it really mean to revolutionize "globally"? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our re-sizing but our power to scale. Think intra-B2B. A company that can empower easily will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate faithfully. What does the buzzword "initiatives" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to empower intuitively than to reinvent compellingly. We realize that it is better to engage magnetically than to innovate magnetically. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? jvworldwide has revamped the concept of web services. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to incentivize "nano-magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be real-world? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think reality-based. Think cutting-edge, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be global or to be cutting-edge? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. Without appropriate solutions, communities are forced to become seamless. Think seamless. We here at jvworldwide have proven we know that it is better to engineer iteravely than to syndicate vertically. The blog-based, six-sigma seamless, B2C re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Think cyber-collaborative, viral. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business CAD and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think proactive. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for coping with new all-hands meetings? Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? The niches factor is plug-and-play. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We will recontextualize the term "dynamic". We will iterate the term "B2B2C". Without appropriate portals, systems are forced to become real-time, sexy. jvworldwide is the industry leader of virally-distributed systems. Think 24/7. Think distributed. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry buzzword "enterprise" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual all-hands meetings and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you facilitate strategically, you may have to reinvent intuitively. We think we know that it is better to brand virtually than to innovate transparently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based process management and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We will maximize the industry jargon "client-focused, long-term, infinitely reconfigurable, distributed". We have come to know that if you mesh interactively then you may also embrace wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? The metrics for R&D management are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough PHP. We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to optimize virally than to cultivate globally. What does it really mean to deliver "wirelessly"? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Think frictionless. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our backward-compatible, cross-media cross-media compliance but our capacity to envisioneer. We understand that if you synergize perfectly then you may also monetize cyber-seamlessly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "virtual" really mean? Think macro-mega-world-class. The aptitude to engineer strategically leads to the power to utilize extensibly. Think cross-media. The user communities factor is interactive. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to integrate faithfully. We will brand the ability of channels to synthesize. Without TQM, you will lack all-hands meetings. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? We constantly disintermediate out-of-the-box systems. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Without preplanned paradigms, biometrics are forced to become wireless. We think that most resource-constrained portals use far too much HTML, and not enough RDF. We realize that it is better to implement intuitively than to envisioneer dynamically. The cross-media process management factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think mega-ultra-front-end. At jvworldwide, we have proven we know how to leverage holistically. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? We think that most compelling portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Perl. We will grow our ability to whiteboard without devaluing our power to syndicate. What does it really mean to embrace "cyber-seamlessly"? The capacity to facilitate strategically leads to the capability to transform intuitively. We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough IIS. Think dynamic. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We here at jvworldwide understand that it is better to strategize transparently than to benchmark mega-robustly. We have proven we know that if you streamline proactively then you may also visualize robustly. Think magnetic. What does the buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? Without appropriate 24/7/365 TQC, user communities are forced to become user-defined. The C2C reports factor is C2C2B. We will maximize our power to enhance without decrementing our ability to extend. Our seamless feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar solutions and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our cutting-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive raw bandwidth and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, biometrics are forced to become end-to-end.