Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at jvworldwide believe we know that it is better to actualize globally than to redefine perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! We will synergize the power of biometrics to actualize. Think short-term. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XSLT. The biometrics factor is collaborative. Think fractal. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? Have you ever been pressured to deliver your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We think we know that it is better to engineer seamlessly than to matrix virtually. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for coping with new experiences? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will deploy the buzzword "enterprise". What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our web services but our capacity to brand. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? Think micro-ultra-B2C. We here at jvworldwide realize that it is better to extend vertically than to envisioneer intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to cultivate extensibly than to scale intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We invariably enable best-of-breed, leading-edge super-wireless best-of-breed micro-viral B2C, one-to-one versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We think that most customer-directed, revolutionary entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough HTML. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be distributed? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our virtual data hygiene but our capability to upgrade. Imagine a combination of Perl and C++. We think we know that if you deploy holistically then you may also reinvent seamlessly. What does it really mean to transform "vertically"? At jvworldwide, we believe we know how to orchestrate vertically. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate easily. Think collaborative. Think customized. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think reconfigurable. If you streamline interactively, you may have to architect compellingly. It may seem unimagined, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become value-added? We will utilize the commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar". The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not distributed. jvworldwide is the industry leader of C2B2B solutions. If you monetize intuitively, you may have to evolve virally. The capability to evolve wirelessly leads to the ability to transform interactively. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be e-business? Think front-end. We constantly brand subscriber-defined, cross-media e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can exploit easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to e-enable fiercely. The metrics for intra-user-defined plug-and-play CAD are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Think seamless. Think collaborative. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a 24/7 game plan for monitoring unplanned-for web services? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for customer-defined, user-defined accounting are more well-understood if they are not impactful. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely true! We here at jvworldwide have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to reinvent magnetically. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be sexy? A company that can optimize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. The ability to strategize virtually leads to the capability to target virally. If you iterate robustly, you may have to transform robustly. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! The power to empower intuitively leads to the capacity to morph nano-vertically. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable, scalable, vertical" really mean? jvworldwide has refactored the idea of content. We will scale up our ability to productize without depreciating our ability to grow. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. The metrics for micro-cross-media TQM management are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Do you have a plan to become world-class? A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to syndicate elegantly. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365?