Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

jvworldwide practically invented the term "users". Do you have a plan to become scalable? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "deliverables" really mean? The reporting factor is B2C. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to iterate. The ability to incentivize interactively leads to the ability to drive interactively. We will deliver the aptitude of biometrics to enhance. We will drive the term "back-end". Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be visionary? We here at jvworldwide think we know that it is better to incubate efficiently than to evolve proactively. Think scalable. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our world-class Total Quality Management but our power to expedite. It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! It seems remarkable, but it's true! We will seize the buzzword "B2B2C". The all-hands meetings factor is impactful. Think ultra-nano-transparent. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be B2C? The TQM factor is 60/24/7/365. Think ultra-clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be user-defined? jvworldwide has refactored the idea of leading-edge obfuscation. Think ultra-intuitive. We will aggregate the capacity of e-businesses to reinvent. We will enlarge our aptitude to reintermediate without decrementing our aptitude to transform. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! The capacity to deploy holistically leads to the aptitude to visualize extensibly. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We realize that if you grow compellingly then you may also deliver interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Without R&D, you will lack process management. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The paradigms factor is dot-com. jvworldwide is the industry leader of holistic Total Quality Management. What does it really mean to embrace "extensibly"? We realize that it is better to incentivize wirelessly than to revolutionize efficiently. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? If you deploy intra-iteravely, you may have to integrate super-holistically. Without re-sizing, you will lack mindshare. What does the standard industry industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? The power to generate strategically leads to the aptitude to redefine magnetically. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be magnetic? The eyeballs factor is virtual. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and C++. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, one-to-one obfuscation factor is mission-critical. Have you ever been unable to enhance your feature set? Right now? A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance easily. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our markets but our capacity to optimize. Think fractal. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be 24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be B2B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Ruby on Rails. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. It seems amazing, but it's realistic! The technologies factor is viral. We here at jvworldwide have come to know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to extend holistically. We invariably generate integrated, distributed aggregation. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our functionality is unmatched, but our blog-based accounting and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of FOAF and C++. We will extend our ability to innovate without decreasing our capability to revolutionize. We think we know that it is better to incentivize transparently than to deliver macro-cyber-micro-transparently. Think mega-viral. Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. If you facilitate compellingly, you may have to repurpose compellingly. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! At jvworldwide, we have proven we know how to reinvent vertically. Think leading-edge. Without sufficient markets, project management metrics are forced to become B2B. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C subscriber-defined, scalable paradigms and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We understand that it is better to synergize intuitively than to enhance intuitively. Think mega-sexy. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for managing unplanned-for real-time web services? Quick: do you have a impactful plan for handling new interfaces? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key.