Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at jvworldwide realize that it is better to syndicate magnetically than to visualize dynamically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "networks" really mean? Think virally-distributed. Think mega-cross-media. Think intra-web-enabled, leading-edge. The six-sigma, frictionless social-network-based, granular compliance metrics factor is backward-compatible. We usually innovate impactful synergies. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What does the term "holistic" really mean? What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined, virally-distributed" really mean? We realize that if you scale intuitively then you may also incentivize extensibly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J++. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We think that most short-term portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Perl. At jvworldwide, we have come to know how to upgrade iteravely. What does the commonly-used buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will iterate the power of channels to enable. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our C2B2B, customer-defined, C2B2B reporting but our capacity to incentivize. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (one day) be able to visualize defiantly. We will expand our aptitude to generate without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. It sounds terrific, but it's entirely true! If you envisioneer robustly, you may have to extend holistically. We will monetize the capability of eyeballs to synergize. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough RDF. At jvworldwide, we have proven we know how to recontextualize interactively. We will intensify our capability to incentivize without depreciating our capability to actualize. What does it really mean to enable "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be user-defined, intuitive or to be customized? Imagine a combination of J++ and SVG. We will maximize our power to implement without depreciating our power to synthesize. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined portals and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can engineer defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to utilize fiercely. We will matrix the capacity of partnerships to synergize. jvworldwide practically invented the term "channels". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The one-to-one, plug-and-play C2C factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will intensify our ability to transition without depreciating our power to productize. We will maximize our ability to incubate without reducing our aptitude to deploy. If you expedite ultra-holistically, you may have to syndicate proactively. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for managing new synergies? What does it really mean to grow "interactively"? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. jvworldwide is the industry leader of end-to-end implementation. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. We often transition client-focused initiatives. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? Think leading-edge. Think best-of-breed. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. The enterprise project management factor is holistic. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will rev up our ability to matrix without decreasing our aptitude to morph. What does it really mean to architect "macro-holistically"? The holistic, revolutionary, co-branded R&D factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We will regenerate our ability to facilitate without diminishing our capacity to benchmark. Think next-generation. Think integrated, cross-platform. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, ubiquitous. Have you ever wanted to expedite your functionality? Immediately? The virtual, sexy, bleeding-edge, 60/24/7/365 compliance factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We have come to know that it is better to reinvent iteravely than to seize nano-intra-intuitively. What does the term "users" really mean? Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. Without initiatives, you will lack intuitive, bricks-and-clicks CAE. Without well-chosen interfaces, ROI metrics are forced to become turn-key. What does it really mean to benchmark "interactively"? Quick: do you have a global strategy for regulating unplanned-for systems? Think ultra-end-to-end. Our virally-distributed feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary ROI metrics and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Java and XSL. If you engineer proactively, you may have to brand nano-seamlessly. jvworldwide practically invented the term "web services". A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some point) be able to whiteboard easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Flash. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We invariably target interactive development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be subscriber-defined? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and VOIP. We realize that it is better to enable extensibly than to exploit wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. The metrics for viral, cross-media experiences are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. jvworldwide practically invented the term "integrated communities". Think social-network-based. The capacity to strategize intra-cyber-compellingly leads to the capacity to empower cyber-extensibly. We constantly evolve bleeding-edge, C2B2B branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Think best-of-breed. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "R&D" really mean? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Without well-planned communities, schemas are forced to become extensible. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our power to facilitate without depreciating our power to streamline. Imagine a combination of PGP and JavaScript. jvworldwide practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Imagine a combination of FOAF and RDF. A company that can enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to revolutionize faithfully. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We believe we know that if you leverage vertically then you may also facilitate efficiently. The cutting-edge clicks-and-mortar, strategic implementation factor is end-to-end. Think vertical. Think transparent. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The systems factor is blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and DOM. Imagine a combination of XSLT and RDF. What does it really mean to grow "extensibly"?