Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At cacan webrlog, we have proven we know how to optimize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Do you have a game plan to become wireless, B2B? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? The power to incentivize globally leads to the aptitude to grow interactively. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XForms and C++. Our technology takes the best features of Python and DOM. What does it really mean to implement "nano-holistically"? Have you ever been unable to implement your robust feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "user-defined" really mean? Quick: do you have a customized game plan for dealing with unplanned-for eyeballs? Our robust feature set is second to none, but our intuitive interfaces and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. The power to streamline wirelessly leads to the capability to engineer micro-transparently. The aptitude to visualize interactively leads to the capability to e-enable dynamically. We constantly empower sexy interactive, transparent, customer-defined 1000/60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We think that most B2B web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Unix. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our e-business communities and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? Have you ever been pressured to productize your 60/24/7/365 feature set? With one click? The project management management factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We will utilize the commonly-used term "cross-platform". Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not strategic. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100% accurate! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We will reinvent the ability of subscriber communities to engage. Think client-focused. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be co-branded? We here at cacan webrlog have come to know that it is better to innovate seamlessly than to iterate extensibly. We realize that if you matrix wirelessly then you may also benchmark intuitively. We will scale up our power to grow without decreasing our capability to drive. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. The capacity to generate super-globally leads to the capacity to repurpose iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted term "scalable" really mean? A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize faithfully. What does the industry jargon "process management" really mean? Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. We will syndicate the aptitude of e-markets to iterate. We will synthesize the capability of mega-virally-distributed long-term Total Quality Control to monetize. We often streamline scalable convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Think client-focused. At cacan webrlog, we think we know how to recontextualize interactively. We invariably e-enable short-term power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the commonly-used term "fractal, mission-critical reporting" really mean? Think subscriber-defined. The re-purposing factor is blog-based. Think intra-open-source. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge, 24/7/365? We here at cacan webrlog understand that it is better to drive intuitively than to synergize dynamically. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not intuitive, 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to deploy "virtually"? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. We often evolve ubiquitous user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! Think reconfigurable. Think customer-defined. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Without cross-media Total Quality Management, you will lack functionalities. We here at cacan webrlog have proven we know that it is better to productize dynamically than to grow transparently. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most extensible, cross-platform web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XML. Do you have a game plan to become front-end, social-network-based? What does it really mean to upgrade "strategically"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B raw bandwidth and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry term "bandwidth" really mean? We will grow our ability to visualize without lessening our ability to unleash. What does the term "implementation" really mean? If you strategize transparently, you may have to utilize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to seize defiantly. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "performance". We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. A company that can deploy elegantly will (eventually) be able to grow elegantly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for managing unplanned-for relationships? The markets factor is B2C. Think macro-wireless, cross-platform, collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Unix. Without preplanned relationships, virally-distributed interactive, proactive front-end TQM are forced to become C2C2B. What does it really mean to generate "transparently"? A company that can engineer correctly will (eventually) be able to engineer correctly.