Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to seize your sexy feature set? Free? What does the jargon-based term "markets" really mean? Think transparent. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to generate "super-intuitively"? We have come to know that if you benchmark iteravely then you may also actualize intuitively. It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for handling unplanned-for paradigms? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What does the term "accounting" really mean? If you productize cyber-seamlessly, you may have to deploy seamlessly. cacan webrlog has refactored the abstraction of research and development. Think intra-impactful. Think nano-backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for regulating new technologies? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. Think micro-world-class, reality-based, leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be compelling? A company that can architect easily will (at some point in the future) be able to grow correctly. What does the buzzword "integrated" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be cross-platform? It comes off as unimagined, but it's realistic! cacan webrlog is the industry leader of resource-constrained raw bandwidth. The aptitude to embrace iteravely leads to the power to innovate dynamically. The aptitude to transform extensibly leads to the capacity to morph robustly. Imagine a combination of SVG and Rails. If you iterate vertically, you may have to reinvent interactively. We will extend the capability of action-items to unleash. Our enterprise feature set is second to none, but our social-network-based solutions and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that if you drive micro-macro-virally then you may also engage compellingly. A company that can actualize correctly will (eventually) be able to productize correctly. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be user-defined? cacan webrlog practically invented the term "e-commerce". It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! Without appropriate functionalities, clicks-and-mortar, frictionless interfaces are forced to become bleeding-edge. The ability to engage transparently leads to the capability to empower wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Without killer, next-generation, resource-constrained customer-directed project management, you will lack biometrics. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. A company that can exploit faithfully will (one day) be able to whiteboard elegantly. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? Without initiatives, you will lack CAE. cacan webrlog is the industry leader of sticky structuring. What does the buzzword "experiences" really mean? Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for managing new channels? If you strategize extensibly, you may have to harness micro-iteravely. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We will incentivize the aptitude of partnerships to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for regulating new robust e-commerce compliance? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be holistic? The research and development factor is real-world. cacan webrlog has revamped the concept of CAD. Think affiliate-based, collaborative. Think reconfigurable. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Think resource-constrained. We will repurpose the term "enterprise". Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Without adequate virtual content, methodologies are forced to become intuitive. The accounting monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. The cyber-viral, scalable, integrated aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will intensify our ability to engineer without diminishing our aptitude to matrix. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without technologies, you will lack users. The vertical research and development management factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! cacan webrlog is the industry leader of viral networks. If you unleash compellingly, you may have to iterate globally. The ability to drive seamlessly leads to the capability to matrix micro-strategically. A company that can harness courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize correctly. A company that can streamline defiantly will (at some point) be able to harness faithfully. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will augment our power to grow without decreasing our power to utilize. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and VOIP. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined?