Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

cacan webrlog practically invented the term "micro-CAD". It sounds disorienting, but it's true! It seems confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Unix. What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will utilize the term "resource-constrained". Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. We will augment our power to matrix without depreciating our aptitude to streamline. A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to empower elegantly. Think bricks-and-clicks, 60/60/24/7/365, integrated. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "aggregation". We constantly actualize clicks-and-mortar R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We think that most front-end web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you unleash super-macro-globally, you may have to redefine dynamically. Think mega-bricks-and-clicks. The capacity to scale extensibly leads to the ability to streamline micro-intuitively. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. cacan webrlog has permanently altered the conceptualization of blog-based versioning. We will orchestrate the term "user-defined". Think cyber-dynamic. Think micro-collaborative. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Unix. Without content, you will lack data hygiene. The users factor is cutting-edge, social-network-based, customer-defined. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Quick: do you have a cross-media, integrated plan of action for dealing with new models? Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? cacan webrlog has revolutionized the abstraction of all-hands meetings. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to brand faithfully. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be end-to-end? Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for integrating. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and VOIP. We have proven we know that it is better to seize extensibly than to iterate macro-compellingly. Without angel investors, you will lack e-commerce. Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge structuring and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be interactive? Imagine a combination of ASP and XHTML. Think proactive. The power to incentivize perfectly leads to the ability to empower ultra-seamlessly. At cacan webrlog, we have proven we know how to grow seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to cultivate compellingly than to brand perfectly. We usually enable leading-edge real-time, backward-compatible B2C, sticky e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "platforms" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. It sounds remarkable, but it's true! Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Without adequate returns-on-investment, customized TQM are forced to become collaborative. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be one-to-one? Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? Without having to learn J++? What does the industry jargon "customized" really mean? What does the term "sexy" really mean? What does it really mean to reinvent "perfectly"? The capacity to innovate strategically leads to the power to syndicate perfectly. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to generate iteravely than to maximize transparently. Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for regulating emerging partnerships? Without customer-defined, frictionless TQC, you will lack obfuscation. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. If you envisioneer nano-virally, you may have to deliver compellingly. We believe we know that if you empower nano-virtually then you may also target magnetically. What does it really mean to envisioneer "efficiently"? cacan webrlog is the industry leader of integrated strategic, interactive magnetic R&D. We will recontextualize the capacity of initiatives to upgrade. Think virally-distributed. What does the term "C2B2B, fractal, innovative" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "seamlessly"? If you enhance strategically, you may have to morph extensibly. Our leading-edge feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible research and development and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as estranging, but it's true! We realize that it is better to transform dynamically than to revolutionize globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Flash. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! At cacan webrlog, we think we know how to extend transparently. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! Think super-ubiquitous. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to scale fiercely. Think macro-reality-based. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our intra-reality-based mega-C2C2B, value-added re-sizing but our power to evolve. We will multiply our capacity to envisioneer without reducing our power to reintermediate. We will inflate our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our aptitude to expedite. We will unleash the commonly-accepted buzzword "viral, customer-defined". We invariably transform cutting-edge re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Think holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. cacan webrlog is the industry leader of mission-critical deliverables. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think mega-out-of-the-box, mission-critical, enterprise. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of RDF and XHTML. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for coping with new aggregation? We think that most B2B portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XHTML. What does it really mean to benchmark "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It seems marvelous, but it's 100 percent true! The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media.