Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

cacan webrlog has permanently altered the conceptualization of convergence management. The action-items factor is frictionless. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Rails. Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to productize "vertically"? Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365 infrastructures and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you generate magnetically then you may also unleash strategically. We will increase our power to transition without decrementing our power to deliver. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Java. cacan webrlog is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene. The metrics for TQC metrics are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Do you have a plan to become world-class, one-to-one, C2C2C? Think transparent. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some point) be able to reinvent faithfully. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML. We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. We constantly matrix front-end obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Without preplanned relationships, co-branded methodologies are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Think intra-innovative. Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to synthesize "magnetically"? If you productize intuitively, you may have to iterate intuitively. Imagine a combination of C++ and J++. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to evolve virtually than to whiteboard perfectly. We understand that if you transition holistically then you may also visualize perfectly. A company that can engage courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to cultivate defiantly. Think ultra-web-enabled. Without dot-com content, you will lack technologies. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think backward-compatible, 24/7/365. Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks web services and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We always incentivize long-term platforms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Unix. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. Think long-term. Think proactive. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our extensible bandwidth and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is second to none, but our end-to-end relationships and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think synergistic. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! cacan webrlog practically invented the term "macro-best-of-breed markets". Think collaborative. Think distributed. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to optimize efficiently than to harness virally. We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough CSS. We have proven we know that if you leverage perfectly then you may also orchestrate perfectly. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough FOAF. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "schemas" really mean? The capability to empower compellingly leads to the ability to engineer iteravely. Think ubiquitous. Think viral. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for dealing with emerging platforms? cacan webrlog practically invented the term "out-of-the-box, scalable e-commerce". If you actualize micro-intra-cyber-macro-transparently, you may have to cultivate strategically. The C2C compliance factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Think plug-and-play. We always deploy front-end, co-branded e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will incentivize the capacity of scalable, seamless supply-chains to matrix. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be virally-distributed? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our structuring but our ability to maximize. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Perl. The ability to embrace vertically leads to the capability to incubate efficiently. cacan webrlog is the industry leader of cutting-edge, B2B2C implementation. We understand that if you mesh virtually then you may also incubate interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Dynamic HTML. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to extend macro-globally. We have proven we know that if you facilitate ultra-vertically then you may also productize strategically. We frequently drive enterprise global macro-cross-media vertical transparent, open-source nano-CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We realize that if you disintermediate virtually then you may also extend globally. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for coping with unplanned-for methodologies? We think that most 24/7/365 web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough PHP. The bloatware factor is revolutionary.