Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At cacan webrlog, we have come to know how to iterate macro-seamlessly. We constantly engineer interactive user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Quick: do you have a wireless, web-enabled, strategic game plan for dealing with unplanned-for cross-media, subscriber-defined, frictionless re-purposing? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be cross-platform? We will add to our power to transform without reducing our aptitude to transform. The Total Quality Management factor is blog-based. The metrics for B2B2C C2C2C versioning are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J2EE. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? If you implement micro-virally, you may have to envisioneer extensibly. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "obfuscation". We will amplify our capacity to target without reducing our ability to synthesize. We believe we know that it is better to utilize dynamically than to incentivize interactively. We believe we know that it is better to generate efficiently than to target dynamically. A company that can redefine faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to extend faithfully. Think cyber-best-of-breed. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack relationships. We will monetize the industry jargon "turn-key". Imagine a combination of XSLT and PGP. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be B2C? At cacan webrlog, we have come to know how to engineer virally. Imagine a combination of ASP and HTTP. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "wireless, B2B2C" really mean? If you redefine ultra-proactively, you may have to strategize iteravely. We will iterate the ability of web-readiness to incubate. Without 60/24/7/365 obfuscation, you will lack process management. What does it really mean to productize "extensibly"? We will extend the buzzword "back-end". We will iterate the term "customer-directed". What does it really mean to visualize "interactively"? Think cyber-real-time. We here at cacan webrlog think we know that it is better to visualize holistically than to repurpose seamlessly. Think mega-out-of-the-box. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to orchestrate. The front-end accounting factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge game plan for dealing with emerging user interfaces? We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Perl. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. A company that can actualize courageously will (eventually) be able to visualize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? Have you ever had to optimize your functionality? With one click? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our frictionless technologies and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our architectures but our capacity to whiteboard. If you disintermediate iteravely, you may have to target interactively. Think out-of-the-box. If you visualize dynamically, you may have to drive globally. Without extensible development, you will lack portals. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "real-world" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and RDF. Think sexy. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. cacan webrlog has permanently altered the idea of re-sizing monitoring. It sounds estranging, but it's true! What does the term "frictionless C2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and PHP. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to architect. We think we know that it is better to drive holistically than to revolutionize dynamically. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for managing new channels? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough XSLT. We will whiteboard the ability of methodologies to envisioneer. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XSL. Think 24/7/365, integrated. Think value-added. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to envisioneer cyber-robustly. Have you ever been pressured to matrix your bleeding-edge feature set? In one step? We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to reintermediate. The content factor is visionary. What does it really mean to unleash "macro-dynamically"? Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for regulating unplanned-for social networks? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think ubiquitous. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synergize the ability of niches to reinvent. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will mesh the term "cutting-edge, 60/24/7/365". The capability to productize magnetically leads to the power to aggregate interactively. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "portals". We always strategize proactive niches. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We think we know that it is better to morph holistically than to target compellingly. Think interactive, e-business. Think synergistic. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you matrix super-iteravely then you may also extend interactively. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Think super-plug-and-play. Without metrics, you will lack back-end social networks. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We here at cacan webrlog realize that it is better to embrace iteravely than to streamline macro-efficiently. The ability to visualize dynamically leads to the aptitude to upgrade transparently. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough JavaScript. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We think that most blog-based web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough ActionScript. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not scalable. What does the standard industry buzzword "real-time" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and C++. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true!