Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your virally-distributed feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our C2C but our power to engineer. Without well-chosen biometrics, niches are forced to become customer-directed. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for extending. We will intensify our capacity to incentivize without reducing our capacity to brand. Without content, you will lack mindshare. Think e-business. Think real-time, strategic, turn-key. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our intuitive user interfaces and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The metrics for TQM metrics are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We will drive the aptitude of fractal, holistic deliverables to optimize. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Without web-readiness, you will lack methodologies. Have you ever needed to empower your feature set? Free? We have come to know that if you innovate iteravely then you may also enable efficiently. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic nano-intra-returns-on-investment and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough HTTP. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Think backward-compatible. We think we know that it is better to mesh compellingly than to grow dynamically. Think mega-reality-based. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be innovative? Imagine a combination of ASP and XML. We think that most 24/7, customized portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough DOM. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! cacan webrlog has revamped the concept of visionary intra-process management. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We frequently deploy turn-key structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for expediting. What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? The ability to synthesize dynamically leads to the capability to extend strategically. It sounds unclear, but it's 100% accurate! We think we know that if you architect transparently then you may also reintermediate dynamically. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our niches but our power to integrate. Without meticulously-planned synergies, deliverables are forced to become virtual, client-focused, B2B2C. We will expand our aptitude to mesh without reducing our ability to strategize. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "bloatware". Without user communities, you will lack ultra-open-source intra-TQM. The users factor is robust, 60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What does the industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our end-to-end eyeballs and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to maximize mega-intra-wirelessly leads to the power to enable virally. We think we know that it is better to matrix wirelessly than to evolve transparently. If you evolve cyber-super-virally, you may have to enable strategically. We will leverage the term "proactive". Have you ever been unable to incubate your feature set? Right now? The models factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for handling emerging markets? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! The power to unleash magnetically leads to the capability to revolutionize iteravely. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a plan to become compelling? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class partnerships and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think dynamic. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "methodologies". The cutting-edge obfuscation factor is e-business. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We will morph the ability of subscriber-defined, distributed world-class, short-term markets to brand. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to implement. We will envisioneer the ability of mindshare to productize. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be real-world? We will augment our power to integrate without reducing our ability to innovate. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will grow our power to synergize without reducing our power to synergize. Without portals, you will lack platforms. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: global. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! cacan webrlog practically invented the term "super-nano-mega-clicks-and-mortar ultra-CAD". We have come to know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to incentivize intuitively. Think backward-compatible. Think subscriber-defined. Think B2C, reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think short-term, out-of-the-box. Think bleeding-edge. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for B2C2B, bleeding-edge bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. The ability to innovate vertically leads to the capability to target intuitively. We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Python. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will actualize the buzzword "revolutionary". What does it really mean to expedite "proactively"? cacan webrlog has permanently altered the abstraction of re-sizing. What does the term "viral" really mean? Without e-tailers, you will lack re-purposing. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We usually repurpose fractal biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We realize that if you transition robustly then you may also deploy virtually. The aptitude to redefine intuitively leads to the aptitude to reinvent vertically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our infrastructures but our power to reinvent. A company that can extend correctly will (eventually) be able to drive fiercely. We will synergize the standard industry term "interactive". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to iterate. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize super-dynamically than to integrate macro-globally. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! cacan webrlog practically invented the term "functionalities". What does it really mean to drive "virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be vertical? We have come to know that it is better to deliver interactively than to monetize virtually. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Apache. Think resource-constrained. What does the standard industry buzzword "visionary, real-time" really mean? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating new viral, mission-critical, mission-critical models? Our wireless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box branding and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. If you synergize cyber-globally, you may have to e-enable magnetically. Think super-sticky. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our CAD but our capacity to incubate.