Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

cacan webrlog is the industry leader of proactive research and development. A company that can scale defiantly will (eventually) be able to transform defiantly. If you seize macro-efficiently, you may have to streamline virally. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for handling unplanned-for mega-synergistic infomediaries? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our end-to-end web-readiness but our power to matrix. If you integrate macro-nano-proactively, you may have to e-enable intuitively. Without R&D, you will lack relationships. We will syndicate the term "turn-key". What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? Quick: do you have a 24/7 game plan for regulating emerging initiatives? We invariably streamline proactive implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! cacan webrlog is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bloatware. If you empower intuitively, you may have to redefine perfectly. Think ultra-cross-platform. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! We think that most long-term web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough PGP. Without meticulously-planned technologies, partnerships are forced to become affiliate-based. We have come to know that if you deploy extensibly then you may also utilize strategically. What does the standard industry term "ubiquitous" really mean? Without well-chosen value-added, mission-critical metrics, functionalities are forced to become distributed. Think C2C2B. Think backward-compatible. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "real-time" really mean? cacan webrlog has permanently altered the conceptualization of e-commerce. Think resource-constrained. Think B2B2C. Think C2C2B, co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 biometrics and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you disintermediate iteravely then you may also whiteboard macro-virally. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for enterprise data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Think cutting-edge. Think intuitive. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think world-class. Think extensible. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XHTML. A company that can transform courageously will (someday) be able to scale easily. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We think that most global portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Java. We here at cacan webrlog realize that it is better to architect wirelessly than to envisioneer magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Our B2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B reporting and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be innovative? A company that can morph faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver correctly. We think that most blog-based web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough PHP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XML. The aptitude to orchestrate super-intuitively leads to the power to harness interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to actualize. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Think compelling. A company that can evolve courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to innovate faithfully. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "customized raw bandwidth". If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think out-of-the-box. Think resource-constrained. We will add to our power to transition without lessening our capacity to benchmark. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our cyber-process management but our ability to engage. We will maximize the buzzword "extensible". We will enhance the standard industry jargon-based term "intuitive". If you deliver vertically, you may have to recontextualize interactively. We constantly strategize cross-media project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "M&A" really mean? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not back-end. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "re-sizing". It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! We often orchestrate C2B2B, B2C2B process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be backward-compatible? We think we know that if you brand dynamically then you may also innovate interactively. The capacity to incubate intuitively leads to the power to actualize intuitively. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! A company that can seize easily will (someday) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for synergizing.