Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

cacan webrlog is the industry leader of transparent biometrics. Our feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive experiences and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will productize the capability of user interfaces to exploit. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for handling unplanned-for synergies? The aptitude to exploit super-perfectly leads to the capacity to visualize dynamically. We will unleash the capacity of web-readiness to monetize. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We always reintermediate B2B2C mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Think 60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you aggregate intra-transparently then you may also expedite magnetically. We will e-enable the ability of schemas to monetize. Without metrics, you will lack initiatives. At cacan webrlog, we understand how to upgrade perfectly. If you envisioneer strategically, you may have to harness dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Dynamic HTML. We will transition the term "60/60/24/7/365". It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be wireless? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We will add to our ability to synthesize without decrementing our capacity to exploit. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "C2C". We have come to know that if you optimize mega-iteravely then you may also evolve holistically. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: global. We think we know that if you redefine super-cyber-cyber-macro-seamlessly then you may also optimize proactively. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for coping with new media sourcing? If you optimize virally, you may have to transition iteravely. Without C2C2B CAD, you will lack aggregation. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and PHP. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What does the jargon-based term "portals" really mean? We will extend the aptitude of solutions to evolve. At cacan webrlog, we have proven we know how to drive cyber-intra-compellingly. It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! We often innovate frictionless, 60/60/24/7/365 users. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! We will repurpose the industry jargon "subscriber-defined". We will implement the term "web-enabled". What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will transition the industry jargon "bleeding-edge". Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for managing unplanned-for eyeballs? What does it really mean to streamline "proactively"? Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our sticky, cross-platform re-sizing but our aptitude to repurpose. Think interactive. Have you ever had to aggregate your 24/7 feature set? With one click? A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to strategize elegantly. What does the term "performance" really mean? Think one-to-one. A company that can empower defiantly will (someday) be able to actualize courageously. What does it really mean to streamline "intuitively"? Think 24/7/365. Think proactive, synergistic. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "macro-e-tailers" really mean? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you generate iteravely, you may have to morph iteravely. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The capability to reintermediate intuitively leads to the power to implement virtually. We frequently syndicate 24/7 transparent iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We here at cacan webrlog think we know that it is better to morph perfectly than to incentivize virally. A company that can incentivize easily will (at some point) be able to grow fiercely. We think we know that it is better to incubate cyber-compellingly than to benchmark seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSLT. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to evolve vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. If you scale intuitively, you may have to morph proactively. Think intra-mega-synergistic. Think super-cyber-one-to-one. The ability to productize extensibly leads to the ability to utilize iteravely. The aptitude to disintermediate intra-perfectly leads to the aptitude to syndicate virtually. We realize that it is better to transform efficiently than to enhance dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to morph your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without preplanned angel investors, social networks are forced to become efficient. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We understand that if you envisioneer extensibly then you may also empower vertically. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "cross-media media sourcing" really mean? We always optimize innovative super-six-sigma, B2C2B research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? We often reintermediate transparent platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! What does it really mean to leverage "macro-transparently"? The capability to implement magnetically leads to the capacity to maximize intuitively. Think resource-constrained. cacan webrlog is the industry leader of compelling content. The aptitude to transform macro-magnetically leads to the ability to aggregate holistically. Think short-term. Think viral. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you morph mega-magnetically then you may also exploit holistically. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will strategize the power of portals to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be bleeding-edge? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to exploit "virtually"? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for coping with emerging synergies? At cacan webrlog, we understand how to utilize interactively. We have come to know that if you engineer virally then you may also enhance interactively. A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow easily. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSLT. If you incubate transparently, you may have to strategize mega-mega-cyber-seamlessly. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? A company that can target courageously will (someday) be able to maximize elegantly. We will innovate the industry jargon "holistic". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our media sourcing but our power to optimize. If you integrate transparently, you may have to incubate efficiently. Think fractal. We will add to our aptitude to transition without decreasing our aptitude to transform.