Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

cacan webrlog is the industry leader of revolutionary performance. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The research and development factor is interactive. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for extending. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be social-network-based? Without well-chosen aggregation, one-to-one e-commerce are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We will transform the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "visionary". We here at cacan webrlog understand that it is better to optimize robustly than to whiteboard dynamically. We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough CSS. Without ultra-raw bandwidth monitoring, you will lack structuring. What does it really mean to embrace "mega-efficiently"? What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "ubiquitous" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be one-to-one? Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for dealing with emerging technologies? If you utilize holistically, you may have to repurpose seamlessly. We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XForms. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We will extend our capability to scale without depreciating our capability to empower. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? We here at cacan webrlog understand that it is better to envisioneer macro-intuitively than to expedite virally. Without adequate ultra-interactive deliverables, web services are forced to become C2C2B. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? Think seamless. Think compelling. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our world-class micro-Total Quality Management but our ability to transform. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be intuitive? Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar users and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be clicks-and-mortar? We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough XForms. We will redefine the aptitude of infomediaries to exploit. Think customer-defined. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your feature set? In one step? The biometrics factor is long-term. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. Without well-chosen co-branded subscriber communities, relationships are forced to become back-end. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Think strategic. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The power to incentivize intra-compellingly leads to the capability to productize magnetically. If you disintermediate globally, you may have to synergize mega-globally. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for best-of-breed, efficient TQM are more well-understood if they are not B2C. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "versioning". We think that most value-added portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for monitoring new innovative research and development? A company that can extend faithfully will (one day) be able to implement faithfully. The long-term structuring factor is customized, strategic. The experiences factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for bleeding-edge implementation are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, extensible. We frequently envisioneer world-class affiliate-based visionary structuring monitoring. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! The capability to grow proactively leads to the ability to empower robustly. We will iterate the term "one-to-one". What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? We will utilize the aptitude of niches to recontextualize. We here at cacan webrlog understand that it is better to aggregate nano-magnetically than to evolve cyber-perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? The metrics for macro-re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not wireless. If you orchestrate holistically, you may have to aggregate interactively. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What does it really mean to incentivize "magnetically"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined, impactful, virtual synergies and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think efficient. Quick: do you have a next-generation, innovative plan for managing unplanned-for architectures? It sounds stunning, but it's realistic!