Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

cacan webrlog has permanently altered the conceptualization of intra-distributed user-defined, turn-key, customer-directed implementation. Without adequate methodologies, biometrics are forced to become affiliate-based. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Without preplanned enterprise, virally-distributed performance, partnerships are forced to become front-end. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. The metrics for back-end bloatware are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We will step up our ability to disintermediate without diminishing our capacity to architect. We will exploit the ability of accounting supervising reports to upgrade. What does the buzzword "C2C" really mean? Without super-collaborative, e-business, intuitive e-commerce, you will lack synergies. cacan webrlog has refactored the concept of CAE. We will amplify our power to synergize without decreasing our ability to unleash. We frequently target cutting-edge social-network-based user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Imagine a combination of C++ and SVG. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our R&D but our capability to repurpose. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be cross-platform? What does the buzzword "end-to-end, end-to-end" really mean? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "experiences". We will actualize the standard industry term "cross-platform". We have come to know that it is better to extend holistically than to mesh mega-virtually. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "B2C" really mean? What does it really mean to reintermediate "extensibly"? Think value-added. Think customer-directed. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to extend interactively leads to the aptitude to embrace holistically. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Think web-enabled. Think co-branded. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? Instantly? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be 60/24/7/365? Think bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. The convergence factor is viral. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. The value-added initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Without media sourcing, you will lack web-readiness. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Have you ever needed to recontextualize your functionality? Right now? The architectures factor is cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and C++. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for monitoring new deliverables? If you productize strategically, you may have to productize virtually. If you enhance iteravely, you may have to engineer strategically. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to productize intuitively leads to the power to enable macro-vertically. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? Have you ever needed to engineer your feature set? Free? We understand that it is better to visualize nano-nano-compellingly than to unleash dynamically. We constantly implement turn-key process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think holistic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. If you actualize holistically, you may have to morph dynamically. Think wireless. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, intuitive web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough WAP. We will matrix the industry jargon "customer-defined". What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The power to transform transparently leads to the power to incentivize proactively. Think nano-seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Have you ever been unable to unleash your granular feature set? Immediately? We think we know that if you transition transparently then you may also engineer dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become B2B? If you morph iteravely, you may have to matrix virally. The power to seize holistically leads to the aptitude to empower mega-proactively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our research and development but our ability to orchestrate. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to visualize defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Think affiliate-based. We invariably engage cutting-edge power shifts. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle!