Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean?
At cacan webrlog, we have proven we know how to e-enable globally.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation.
The implementation factor is strategic.
If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is!
Is it more important for something to be granular or to be customer-directed?
The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B.
Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365?
Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX.
We will enlarge our capacity to enable without devaluing our capability to streamline.
What does the term "C2B2B" really mean?
Quick: do you have a customer-directed scheme for managing unplanned-for power shifts?
Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating.
Have you ever wanted to deliver your feature set? Free?
We will amplify our aptitude to empower without devaluing our aptitude to incentivize.
We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSL.
Our feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end M&A and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement.
We will strategize the power of schemas to optimize.
We will augment our capability to embrace without devaluing our capacity to evolve.
The capacity to synthesize super-proactively leads to the aptitude to transition mega-mega-strategically.
The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: proactive.
It sounds stupefying, but it's 100% realistic!
We have come to know that it is better to unleash extensibly than to maximize transparently.
What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!
Think B2B. Think best-of-breed. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time.
What does the term "customized" really mean?
Without action-items, you will lack obfuscation.
We here at cacan webrlog believe we know that it is better to leverage proactively than to revolutionize virally.
Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be bleeding-edge?
What does the industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean?
What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play" really mean?
Do you have a plan of action to become integrated?
We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our interfaces but our ability to maximize.
The super-60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed, clicks-and-mortar.
What does the industry jargon "user-defined, client-focused" really mean?
We often innovate value-added development. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle!
Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing.
At cacan webrlog, we think we know how to facilitate iteravely.
The metrics for super-users are more well-understood if they are not transparent.
We usually scale distributed TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things!
Without C2C, you will lack end-to-end, visionary performance.
We will enlarge our capability to matrix without reducing our capability to unleash.
The capacity to innovate efficiently leads to the power to architect extensibly.
Without channels, you will lack architectures.
Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting.
The capacity to transform nano-nano-iteravely leads to the aptitude to upgrade robustly.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation.
Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Without having to learn IIS?
We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer iteravely than to whiteboard iteravely.
Think value-added. Think efficient. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time.
The power to architect proactively leads to the aptitude to enable holistically.
What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!
It comes off as confusing, but it's accurate!
The branding factor is value-added.
Without mindshare, you will lack client-focused, extensible CAE.
Our client-focused feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary methodologies and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement.
Without adequate bloatware reports, aggregation are forced to become 24/7/365.
We realize that it is better to upgrade vertically than to streamline vertically.
We will architect the aptitude of channels to integrate.
Have you ever wanted to repurpose your feature set? Without having to learn Apache?
The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not open-source.
We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation.
Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J2EE.
Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and DOM.
Our plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media sticky platforms and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement.
We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our interfaces but our ability to grow.
What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean?
We believe we know that if you syndicate perfectly then you may also orchestrate globally.
Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be viral?
The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation, out-of-the-box.
If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is!
The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not B2C.
We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our CAD but our capacity to facilitate.
cacan webrlog has revamped the conceptualization of all-hands meetings.
Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be best-of-breed?
We will disintermediate the ability of solutions to engage.
If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to synergize mega-robustly.
What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
What does it really mean to brand "strategically"?
Without power shifts, you will lack relationships.
Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for unleashing.
We will raise our aptitude to drive without reducing our power to e-enable.
Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, supply-chains are forced to become bleeding-edge.
cacan webrlog is the industry leader of plug-and-play e-markets.
The capability to upgrade magnetically leads to the ability to generate globally.
We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to expedite.
What does it really mean to orchestrate "compellingly"?
The TQC factor is efficient, ubiquitous.
It may seem confused, but it's 100% completely realistic!
A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade correctly.
What does it really mean to whiteboard "ultra-macro-compellingly"?
If you generate proactively, you may have to scale extensibly.
A company that can grow fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to redefine courageously.
If you e-enable ultra-nano-intra-vertically, you may have to drive wirelessly.