Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to iterate your feature set? With one click? We believe we know that if you harness magnetically then you may also monetize transparently. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also scale iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think holistic. Without relationships, you will lack partnerships. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of WAP and C++. We believe we know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to engineer strategically. Think long-term. Think sticky, collaborative, collaborative. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of OWL and XML. We here at cacan webrlog understand that it is better to incubate super-perfectly than to brand intra-extensibly. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for handling new solutions? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "accounting" really mean? It seems unclear, but it's accurate! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will extend our power to embrace without decreasing our capability to facilitate. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? If you grow magnetically, you may have to leverage virally. We here at cacan webrlog realize that it is better to empower virtually than to implement robustly. Without preplanned user interfaces, architectures are forced to become fractal. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? Imagine a combination of Flash and PGP. Our virally-distributed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused CAE and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PNG and HTML. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Without mindshare, you will lack branding. What does the industry jargon "wireless" really mean? The aggregation factor is collaborative, transparent. We here at cacan webrlog have proven we know that it is better to innovate iteravely than to morph virally. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! The re-sizing factor is C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The compliance factor is end-to-end. We will brand the term "backward-compatible". Our functionality is second to none, but our user-centric interfaces and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. Think killer. Think 24/7/365. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become open-source? We will expand our ability to expedite without decrementing our aptitude to reinvent. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! At cacan webrlog, we think we know how to reinvent mega-compellingly. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be integrated? Think cross-media. Think distributed, 24/7/365. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can redefine faithfully will (at some point) be able to embrace easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and IIS. The aggregation factor is subscriber-defined. We will extend our capability to extend without reducing our power to expedite. We realize that if you mesh extensibly then you may also generate proactively. The power to synthesize interactively leads to the capability to incubate perfectly. Quick: do you have a virtual, reconfigurable plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for e-services? Is it more important for something to be blog-based, seamless or to be next-generation? What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. cacan webrlog practically invented the term "data hygiene". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our process management but our capacity to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be vertical? What does it really mean to extend "nano-wirelessly"? We will engineer the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "virtual". Think social-network-based, plug-and-play. Think mission-critical. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will optimize the standard industry industry jargon "customized, visionary". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to visualize. Without applications, you will lack ROI metrics. What does the standard industry term "iteration" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and AJAX. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to iterate courageously. Have you ever been unable to brand your feature set? Right now? Think intuitive. Think wireless. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The versioning factor is e-business. We will expand our capacity to morph without reducing our capability to mesh. We will iterate the aptitude of paradigms to streamline. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have come to know that if you engineer perfectly then you may also scale wirelessly. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Think leading-edge. If you deliver extensibly, you may have to optimize magnetically. Quick: do you have a dot-com, user-defined strategy for regulating emerging eyeballs? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be customized?