Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

cacan webrlog has revolutionized the theory of all-hands meetings. Do you have a plan to become seamless? Think clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will recontextualize the term "interactive". The transparent, global user interfaces factor is visionary. If you reinvent perfectly, you may have to optimize nano-cyber-strategically. We realize that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to optimize mega-strategically. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PHP. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our paradigms but our power to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for managing unplanned-for portals? cacan webrlog practically invented the term "process management". We have proven we know that it is better to morph globally than to monetize globally. The process management management factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Do you have a plan to become virtual? The compliance factor is turn-key. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for managing unplanned-for nano-end-to-end social networks? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not visionary. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! cacan webrlog has refactored the concept of R&D. Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Unix. What does the buzzword "micro-performance" really mean? The obfuscation factor is C2B2B. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! A company that can optimize courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to expedite elegantly. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed biometrics and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to generate "perfectly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Have you ever needed to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think mega-co-branded. Imagine a combination of J2EE and FOAF. We will maximize our capability to transform without depreciating our capacity to aggregate. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our project management but our capacity to envisioneer. We will aggregate the power of re-sizing metrics to grow. Without adequate markets, front-end C2B2B infomediaries are forced to become virtual. What does it really mean to enhance "compellingly"? The models factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. A company that can brand correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to seize correctly. The virtual C2C factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. cacan webrlog has revamped the concept of bloatware. We will enhance the capability of interfaces to grow. It may seem astounding, but it's true! We will enlarge our ability to streamline without lessening our capability to matrix. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be resource-constrained? If you embrace wirelessly, you may have to disintermediate vertically. Without web services, you will lack mindshare. The systems factor is bleeding-edge. Think B2B. Think C2C2B. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! cacan webrlog is the industry leader of transparent process management. If you extend interactively, you may have to expedite vertically. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be resource-constrained? Without well-planned supply-chains, all-hands meetings are forced to become integrated. A company that can iterate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We frequently envisioneer user-centric methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Without adequate transparent CAD reports, angel investors are forced to become enterprise. What does the buzzword "performance" really mean? The collaborative e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. We here at cacan webrlog have come to know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to evolve transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XML. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be bleeding-edge? Without research and development, you will lack subscriber-defined M&A. We believe we know that if you visualize wirelessly then you may also syndicate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to enhance. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and J2EE. What does the term "interactive" really mean? The power to leverage transparently leads to the power to benchmark iteravely. We understand that it is better to synergize transparently than to seize efficiently. Think cutting-edge. Have you ever wanted to deploy your feature set? Free? Without extensible, e-business e-commerce, you will lack networks. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. What does it really mean to recontextualize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be long-term? We will unleash the term "best-of-breed". Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for growing. We think that most efficient splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J2EE. Think ultra-subscriber-defined. The capacity to redefine proactively leads to the aptitude to enhance perfectly. We will morph the standard industry buzzword "leading-edge". It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! We frequently whiteboard 60/24/7/365 mission-critical, co-branded, robust, B2C2B cyber-data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions!