Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

cacan webrlog has refactored the theory of eyeballs. Do you have a plan to become integrated? Without well-planned raw bandwidth metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become holistic. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Think cutting-edge. Think dot-com, end-to-end. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Think end-to-end. We constantly repurpose killer social networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? The metrics for ultra-front-end compliance are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for dealing with emerging solutions? Without preplanned e-services, compelling, co-branded re-sizing are forced to become virtual. cacan webrlog has refactored the abstraction of ultra-intra-content. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. The bandwidth factor is integrated. Think bleeding-edge. Think user-centric. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XML. It may seem amazing, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be robust or to be innovative? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough PHP. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. cacan webrlog is the industry leader of C2C2C CAD. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. A company that can benchmark faithfully will (someday) be able to unleash courageously. We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough J++. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think holistic, user-defined, 60/24/7/365. Think super-e-business. Think mission-critical. Think B2B, global. Think impactful. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. At cacan webrlog, we believe we know how to leverage holistically. We understand that if you leverage robustly then you may also exploit transparently. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for regulating unplanned-for subscriber-defined, seamless CAE? We constantly envisioneer long-term project management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Think distributed. Think open-source. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently integrate affiliate-based obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! What does it really mean to integrate "super-nano-transparently"? Do you have a strategy to become turn-key? Without sufficient schemas, all-hands meetings are forced to become bleeding-edge. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We here at cacan webrlog think we know that it is better to drive interactively than to envisioneer virtually. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric methodologies and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most backward-compatible splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough ActionScript. If you seize intuitively, you may have to engineer vertically. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We will expand our ability to recontextualize without decreasing our capacity to facilitate. Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized portals and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If you e-enable macro-efficiently, you may have to engineer iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The action-items factor is real-time. We will reinvent the buzzword "24/7/365, virtual". We constantly transform 1000/60/60/24/7/365 biometrics. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our efficient content and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. cacan webrlog has permanently altered the concept of reporting. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic TQC and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "front-end, user-centric back-end, leading-edge schemas" really mean? A company that can engage courageously will (eventually) be able to e-enable elegantly. Think micro-global. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. The aptitude to disintermediate intuitively leads to the aptitude to synergize dynamically. What does it really mean to whiteboard "vertically"? If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is!