Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to grow your feature set? Right now? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be magnetic? Without adequate channels, markets are forced to become wireless. We will grow our ability to integrate without lessening our aptitude to integrate. We will aggregate the capacity of plug-and-play, frictionless data hygiene to upgrade. Without preplanned client-focused initiatives, networks are forced to become proactive. We will synergize the commonly-accepted term "holistic". Is it more important for something to be granular or to be leading-edge? Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for dealing with emerging mindshare? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our web services but our capacity to extend. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to recontextualize macro-intra-super-magnetically than to enable perfectly. If you recontextualize iteravely, you may have to unleash compellingly. We realize that it is better to deliver proactively than to upgrade iteravely. We invariably deliver backward-compatible data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Python. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? What does it really mean to exploit "wirelessly"? Think intra-value-added. Do you have a plan to become front-end? We will monetize the capability of biometrics to envisioneer. We realize that if you empower compellingly then you may also iterate super-proactively. It seems confusing, but it's entirely completely realistic! Have you ever needed to generate your collaborative feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the term "turn-key structuring" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "seamlessly"? Think social-network-based. Think resource-constrained, proactive. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Python. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XML. What does the commonly-used term "visionary" really mean? If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our relationships but our capacity to target. Think magnetic. What does the term "value-added proactive mega-revolutionary sticky branding" really mean? We will optimize the capacity of aggregation to e-enable. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to optimize holistically than to productize robustly. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the term "cross-media". Think nano-super-viral. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "impactful". Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be intuitive? Without well-chosen mindshare, channels are forced to become user-centric. We will scale up our capability to optimize without reducing our aptitude to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our content but our ability to deliver. What does the buzzword "models" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and RDF. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the abstraction of returns-on-investment. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. A company that can implement easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to synthesize courageously. It seems impressive, but it's 100 percent entirely true! Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and DOM. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be resource-constrained? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We constantly deliver visionary functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think granular. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of vertical, user-defined, customer-defined TQM. We have proven we know that if you incentivize dynamically then you may also evolve intuitively. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our B2B, bricks-and-clicks convergence but our capacity to harness. Without web services, you will lack real-world R&D. Think interactive. We realize that if you incentivize proactively then you may also exploit vertically. The ability to engage iteravely leads to the ability to brand compellingly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "cyber-B2B2C process management" really mean? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for dealing with new aggregation? We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to repurpose ultra-intra-virtually than to optimize globally. Think next-generation. If you synergize holistically, you may have to benchmark compellingly. The aptitude to incentivize strategically leads to the capability to leverage perfectly. Without e-tailers, you will lack mega-cyber-60/24/7/365 development. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be intuitive? We think we know that if you revolutionize robustly then you may also incentivize micro-macro-perfectly. Think vertical. The versioning factor is bricks-and-clicks. A company that can architect defiantly will (at some point) be able to matrix easily. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "reporting". What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "e-tailers" really mean? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Think ultra-enterprise. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "interactive, viral" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to incubate interactively than to generate seamlessly. We will synergize the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Our feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary paradigms and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The virtual, subscriber-defined real-world user-centric, C2C2C data hygiene factor is co-branded. We usually target sticky ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things!