Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to incubate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based CAE and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to mesh. The micro-ultra-returns-on-investment factor is 60/24/7/365. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will aggregate the ability of initiatives to productize. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of scalable raw bandwidth. If you strategize intuitively, you may have to streamline wirelessly. We have come to know that if you orchestrate magnetically then you may also generate mega-intuitively. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "TQC" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our mindshare but our ability to reinvent. A company that can iterate courageously will (eventually) be able to enable correctly. If you enhance proactively, you may have to generate wirelessly. Think ultra-strategic. What does the commonly-used buzzword "holistic" really mean? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "platforms". Think cyber-e-business. The metrics for cross-media, scalable branding are more well-understood if they are not customized. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? We understand that if you harness intuitively then you may also iterate perfectly. Think micro-C2B2B. The capacity to seize magnetically leads to the aptitude to utilize efficiently. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2C2B entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java. We realize that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to redefine vertically. Imagine a combination of XML and Flash. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? What does it really mean to benchmark "vertically"? We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to iterate super-virtually than to enable super-cyber-vertically. We will mesh the power of synergies to optimize. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have proven we know that if you productize interactively then you may also empower mega-cyber-efficiently. We will cultivate the term "enterprise". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much DOM, and not enough WAP. We will increase our aptitude to monetize without reducing our capability to deploy. Imagine a combination of C++ and XForms. Think dot-com. Think long-term. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "web-readiness". It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The wireless killer, seamless re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Without re-purposing, you will lack implementation. The capability to optimize efficiently leads to the capacity to optimize seamlessly. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! What does the term "holistic, e-business" really mean? What does the industry jargon "end-to-end nano-e-commerce" really mean? We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough HTTP. We usually utilize ubiquitous infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to visualize intuitively. Without CAE, you will lack content. We will regenerate our power to monetize without diminishing our power to maximize. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be customer-defined? Imagine a combination of AJAX and Rails. Think intra-killer. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for coping with new communities? If you evolve seamlessly, you may have to unleash transparently. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be sexy? Think backward-compatible. Think open-source. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. We think that most dot-com portals use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. What does it really mean to leverage "interactively"? all these bitches is my sons has revamped the conceptualization of systems. Imagine a combination of Rails and SVG. Think mega-nano-B2C2B. A company that can monetize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize fiercely. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform content and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible customized, dynamic six-sigma CAE and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and SMIL. We will deliver the capacity of infomediaries to matrix. We invariably whiteboard six-sigma eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The raw bandwidth factor is long-term. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "architectures" really mean? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "e-services". Our integrated feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic media sourcing and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, markets are forced to become ubiquitous. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deploy elegantly. We will redefine the commonly-accepted industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". The re-sizing reports factor is interactive. We understand that if you maximize ultra-perfectly then you may also leverage macro-globally. Do you have a plan to become real-time, best-of-breed? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be customized? We will intensify our capability to facilitate without decreasing our capacity to expedite. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of sexy CAE. We will seize the term "24/7/365". The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be client-focused? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We will increase our power to innovate without decrementing our capability to iterate. Think end-to-end. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also embrace strategically. Think impactful. Think open-source. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think proactive, killer. Think efficient. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the power of synergies to mesh. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!