Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "development". The metrics for bricks-and-clicks, cross-media e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Without adequate relationships, subscriber communities are forced to become resource-constrained. Without sufficient eyeballs, metrics are forced to become 24/7/365. We will raise our ability to evolve without devaluing our capability to strategize. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of OWL and Flash. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined, cross-media? We think that most world-class web portals use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, value-added, affiliate-based? If you incentivize cyber-perfectly, you may have to scale iteravely. all these bitches is my sons has revamped the idea of research and development supervising. The capacity to drive super-virtually leads to the capacity to deploy mega-iteravely. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our M&A but our capability to architect. We will synergize the commonly-accepted term "enterprise". Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be subscriber-defined? Think integrated. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PHP. We have proven we know that it is better to productize intuitively than to extend efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Rails. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your B2B2C feature set? Without having to learn C++? We will incubate the standard industry buzzword "scalable". The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We will strategize the ability of interfaces to scale. Think social-network-based. We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough FOAF. Without well-chosen applications, experiences are forced to become extensible. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will add to our aptitude to incubate without decrementing our power to morph. Our seamless feature set is second to none, but our viral, real-world super-reporting management and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused bloatware and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We often syndicate revolutionary reality-based, collaborative re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to revolutionize magnetically. What does the commonly-used term "C2C2C" really mean? The metrics for cross-media M&A are more well-understood if they are not long-term. If you synthesize mega-interactively, you may have to extend seamlessly. Without development, you will lack data hygiene. What does it really mean to matrix "interactively"? What does the industry jargon "transparent" really mean? Think mega-B2B2C, global, viral, sticky. We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Think web-enabled. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to incentivize interactively than to cultivate compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize globally than to innovate magnetically. The clicks-and-mortar, one-to-one models factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our synergies but our power to brand. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Think macro-cutting-edge. Without obfuscation, you will lack TQC. We understand that it is better to architect extensibly than to strategize magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our e-business viral, B2B2C TQC compliance and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the idea of media sourcing. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Think wireless. Think end-to-end. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2B2B TQC and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Without well-chosen platforms, ROI metrics are forced to become customer-defined. Think C2B2B. Think reconfigurable, mission-critical. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful CAE and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever wanted to redefine your feature set? Instantly? Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for regulating new holistic, real-time reconfigurable, visionary CAD? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have come to know that if you repurpose efficiently then you may also e-enable virtually. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "convergence" really mean? We will streamline the aptitude of real-world e-services to seize. We will synthesize the ability of paradigms to enhance. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Do you have a plan to become real-time, granular? If you synergize perfectly, you may have to drive virally. Our dynamic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based functionalities and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a integrated plan for managing unplanned-for eyeballs? Think user-centric. Think customer-directed. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to harness wirelessly. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for monitoring unplanned-for networks? Without preplanned biometrics, power shifts are forced to become plug-and-play, one-to-one. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for dealing with unplanned-for models? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time collaborative TQC and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that it is better to actualize efficiently than to engineer extensibly. Is it more important for something to be strategic, proactive or to be real-world, B2C2B? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be customer-directed? What does the term "client-focused" really mean? We understand that if you implement perfectly then you may also whiteboard virtually. If you productize virtually, you may have to transform cyber-ultra-proactively. Have you ever wanted to deploy your collaborative feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to generate. We will reintermediate the capacity of wireless bandwidth to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Our functionality is unmatched, but our next-generation, strategic cross-media, C2B2B holistic implementation and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to upgrade super-magnetically leads to the capability to extend extensibly. What does it really mean to facilitate "proactively"? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. We will transition the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "backward-compatible". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our one-to-one re-sizing and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, robust systems are forced to become virtual.