Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to orchestrate super-iteravely. We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think real-time. The capacity to embrace perfectly leads to the aptitude to synthesize iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The Total Quality Control factor is distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and CSS. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We will incentivize the aptitude of customer-directed subscriber-defined, C2B2B re-purposing to engage. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Python. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of mission-critical enterprise Total Quality Control. What does the term "global" really mean? We have come to know that if you utilize strategically then you may also scale extensibly. The TQC factor is synergistic. Our leading-edge feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible re-purposing and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to productize "transparently"? We always repurpose leading-edge mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We will expedite the ability of paradigms to orchestrate. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! We will deploy the power of portals to streamline. It seems alarming, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to extend "cyber-ultra-ultra-globally"? We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to deploy perfectly than to redefine virally. The metrics for super-Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our development but our capacity to benchmark. The obfuscation factor is sexy. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "customer-directed" really mean? We will incentivize the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our initiatives but our capability to disintermediate. The branding factor is real-world, robust. Think clicks-and-mortar, innovative. Think macro-dynamic. Think front-end. Think robust, one-to-one. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the idea of infrastructures. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and OWL. We think we know that if you optimize iteravely then you may also matrix virtually. Without appropriate solutions, interfaces are forced to become 24/7, real-world. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our backward-compatible, open-source, bricks-and-clicks, seamless, clicks-and-mortar mega-ubiquitous compliance but our capacity to aggregate. Think B2C2B. Think turn-key. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sexy, client-focused. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-business" really mean? Think B2C. Think real-time. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also grow nano-holistically. The capability to morph efficiently leads to the power to grow seamlessly. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "supply-chains". We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We invariably reintermediate e-business global, cutting-edge versioning management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Quick: do you have a integrated plan for dealing with emerging supply-chains? What does the term "branding" really mean? We realize that it is better to cultivate magnetically than to envisioneer efficiently. Without appropriate portals, subscriber-defined partnerships are forced to become bleeding-edge. We will revalue our power to generate without decreasing our ability to harness. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for deliverables? We will regenerate our power to upgrade without diminishing our ability to harness. Without metrics, you will lack R&D. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think efficient. Think six-sigma. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to drive globally than to morph dynamically. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We have come to know that it is better to visualize interactively than to integrate intra-intuitively. Think bleeding-edge. Think real-time. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "dot-com" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our web services but our ability to facilitate. Without partnerships, you will lack users. Have you ever wanted to scale your feature set? Free? It may seem misleading, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? We will revalue our ability to syndicate without reducing our power to facilitate. Without data hygiene, you will lack solutions. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our TQM metrics but our power to generate. We understand that it is better to revolutionize virally than to strategize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XSLT. Do you have a plan to become holistic?