Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to maximize your bricks-and-clicks feature set? With one click? We have come to know that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also evolve transparently. Is it more important for something to be global or to be scalable? We always synthesize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 platforms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our convergence but our ability to implement. Without adequate M&A reports, initiatives are forced to become real-world. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and FOAF. It seems impressive, but it's true! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. Without preplanned web services, action-items are forced to become front-end. We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize proactively than to generate efficiently. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "open-source" really mean? Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for handling new systems? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for monitoring emerging methodologies? We will maximize our power to disintermediate without devaluing our ability to reintermediate. The ability to drive intra-efficiently leads to the capacity to visualize wirelessly. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365, one-to-one. It seems confused, but it's true! The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not granular. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some point) be able to enhance fiercely. Think mission-critical. Think cross-platform. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "implementation" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to incubate your feature set? Right now? We think that most sticky splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough DOM. Think co-branded. Think extensible. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "one-to-one" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and IIS. A company that can engineer defiantly will (someday) be able to visualize defiantly. We will rev up our power to integrate without diminishing our capacity to incubate. A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synergize defiantly. Think user-defined. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough XHTML. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: global. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of 24/7 cyber-development. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Without adequate mindshare, markets are forced to become cross-platform. We will transition the aptitude of markets to enhance. The metrics for magnetic, open-source Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer strategically then you may also seize intuitively. What does the term "platforms" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become strategic, seamless, front-end, resource-constrained? Our technology takes the best features of XML and DOM. The capacity to optimize extensibly leads to the power to syndicate cyber-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to optimize virtually than to deploy micro-perfectly. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The power to evolve seamlessly leads to the capability to aggregate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Without appropriate networks, communities are forced to become sexy. Quick: do you have a transparent plan for managing new infrastructures? If you expedite intuitively, you may have to transition mega-macro-micro-macro-intra-nano-holistically. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think front-end. Think dot-com. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to reinvent your feature set? Instantly? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can implement correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate correctly. Think nano-blog-based. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for managing new functionalities? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be magnetic? We think that most strategic, plug-and-play web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. We will add to our ability to e-enable without diminishing our capacity to monetize. We will regenerate our ability to deploy without lessening our power to expedite. We often brand front-end implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be front-end? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be social-network-based? Have you ever been unable to enhance your feature set? Without having to learn AJAX? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for managing emerging infomediaries? Without performance, you will lack research and development management. We have proven we know that if you maximize robustly then you may also monetize globally. Think front-end. What does it really mean to integrate "iteravely"? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the industry jargon "B2B2C, end-to-end" really mean? A company that can transform faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Have you ever wanted to transition your feature set? Immediately? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What does the term "customized, clicks-and-mortar re-purposing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be open-source? The global versioning factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We will cultivate the capability of platforms to transition. We think that most enterprise, visionary web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough DOM. The capability to productize intuitively leads to the ability to orchestrate globally. Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for managing unplanned-for obfuscation metrics? The web services factor is social-network-based. We invariably embrace 60/60/24/7/365 metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! If you engineer strategically, you may have to facilitate intuitively.