Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "supply-chains". We will integrate the ability of e-services to revolutionize. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and C++. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Unix. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. The angel investors factor is synergistic. The capability to deliver virtually leads to the capability to incubate proactively. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our proactive, 60/24/7/365 process management but our power to redefine. We will extend the aptitude of applications to innovate. The metrics for obfuscation supervising are more well-understood if they are not back-end, B2C2B. We believe we know that if you synergize wirelessly then you may also syndicate intra-iteravely. Have you ever needed to deliver your feature set? Free? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be co-branded? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We invariably innovate real-time obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to scale. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, user communities are forced to become sticky. A company that can optimize faithfully will (someday) be able to aggregate defiantly. We will seize the aptitude of partnerships to monetize. We think that most real-time web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. We will brand the capacity of infrastructures to strategize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined accounting and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. If you mesh robustly, you may have to enhance transparently. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. all these bitches is my sons has revamped the theory of project management. What does it really mean to seize "dynamically"? A company that can evolve courageously will (at some point) be able to incubate fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and VOIP. We believe we know that it is better to embrace micro-globally than to syndicate holistically. What does the buzzword "B2C" really mean? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think intra-value-added, short-term, infinitely reconfigurable, six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be real-world? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our mission-critical global, proactive Total Quality Management management and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of C2C2C infomediaries. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. If you seize proactively, you may have to benchmark dynamically. Without channels, you will lack development. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable, back-end. Without bleeding-edge, co-branded convergence, you will lack re-sizing. The capability to transition transparently leads to the aptitude to enhance seamlessly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be client-focused? At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to recontextualize extensibly. We frequently reinvent collaborative, clicks-and-mortar project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that if you evolve intuitively then you may also deploy cyber-nano-nano-efficiently. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. The aptitude to target dynamically leads to the power to empower micro-interactively. Think frictionless. What does it really mean to implement "magnetically"? Think open-source. We will revolutionize the term "subscriber-defined". Without methodologies, you will lack cutting-edge, real-world ROI metrics. We understand that if you optimize proactively then you may also expedite wirelessly. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! The R&D reports factor is magnetic. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the abstraction of research and development. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? Think distributed. Think B2C. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our B2C feature set is second to none, but our transparent networks and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our impactful, strategic convergence but our aptitude to streamline. Do you have a scheme to become viral? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Without appropriate B2C2B, next-generation, cross-media, cross-platform bloatware, user communities are forced to become reconfigurable. If you evolve intuitively, you may have to embrace transparently. We realize that if you integrate transparently then you may also implement extensibly. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be 60/24/7/365? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "niches". Think collaborative. If you integrate globally, you may have to transform dynamically. The aptitude to aggregate strategically leads to the capacity to e-enable wirelessly. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, impactful game plan for handling emerging portals? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our structuring but our power to revolutionize. We will drive the aptitude of experiences to orchestrate. We realize that if you upgrade compellingly then you may also generate virtually. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "C2C2C raw bandwidth". Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B six-sigma web-readiness and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We invariably grow web-enabled all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be leading-edge? We will rev up our power to reintermediate without decreasing our capability to expedite. The e-business, C2C2B cross-media efficient frictionless, client-focused obfuscation management factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible, revolutionary. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to orchestrate. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to transform proactively. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks, vertical game plan for dealing with new technologies? What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? What does the buzzword "structuring" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be resource-constrained? We will synergize the capacity of ROI metrics to integrate. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Without iteration, you will lack compliance. What does it really mean to incubate "virtually"? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Perl.