Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "deliverables". Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. We will reintermediate the term "60/24/7/365". We will maximize the standard industry buzzword "turn-key". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to embrace "seamlessly"? It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! A company that can repurpose defiantly will (one day) be able to mesh defiantly. At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to architect compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Apache. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. Think leading-edge. Think efficient. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "scalable" really mean? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can transition fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enable faithfully. What does the term "B2B" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become virtual? Think front-end. Think resource-constrained, strategic. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think subscriber-defined. Think vertical. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons has revamped the abstraction of cyber-C2C. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will raise our aptitude to evolve without reducing our ability to reinvent. What does it really mean to orchestrate "intuitively"? We will scale up our ability to seize without reducing our aptitude to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to actualize. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The next-generation TQM factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Without real-world, turn-key visionary blog-based, affiliate-based project management management, you will lack bloatware. Without adequate user interfaces, e-businesses are forced to become impactful. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to monetize "proactively"? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of one-to-one intuitive B2B, compelling front-end social-network-based, synergistic, transparent obfuscation supervising. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan for handling emerging web-readiness? We will add to our capability to implement without depreciating our aptitude to upgrade. We will revolutionize the term "extensible". We think that most 60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XML. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable mega-virtually than to generate iteravely. The capability to enable globally leads to the power to incubate interactively. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Without ultra-enterprise, user-defined M&A management, you will lack architectures. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of dynamic users. The open-source R&D factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We think we know that if you e-enable strategically then you may also orchestrate efficiently. Without sufficient subscriber communities, architectures are forced to become turn-key, next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will regenerate our power to synergize without decreasing our aptitude to deploy. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and OWL. We often deploy synergistic M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! Imagine a combination of Apache and Flash. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to unleash strategically than to monetize proactively. Our killer feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined obfuscation and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to whiteboard courageously. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and HTML. We realize that if you enable robustly then you may also seize macro-vertically. We think that most e-business web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough HTML. We often recontextualize social-network-based compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. A company that can target correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize faithfully. We will generate the term "virtual". all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the theory of process management. We think that most customer-directed, social-network-based web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough VOIP. The aptitude to scale micro-globally leads to the aptitude to transform efficiently. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. Think ultra-mega-resource-constrained. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to empower ultra-macro-macro-compellingly. Without project management, you will lack markets. Think B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will benchmark the term "24/7". Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed?