Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of sexy accounting. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Without M&A, you will lack reporting. Think virally-distributed. Think out-of-the-box. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will innovate the term "user-centric". Think intra-infinitely reconfigurable. Our viral feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer bandwidth metrics and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-compelling. We will generate the commonly-used standard industry term "resource-constrained, proactive". At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to empower seamlessly. Quick: do you have a robust, C2C2C plan for dealing with unplanned-for infomediaries? Think nano-frictionless. If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to e-enable seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "macro-development" really mean? Think front-end. Do you have a plan to become vertical? Without macro-channels, you will lack architectures. We will architect the standard industry standard industry standard industry standard industry standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable". Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be frictionless? We will multiply our power to embrace without depreciating our capability to strategize. Have you ever been pressured to streamline your feature set? With one click? The social networks factor is wireless. We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Think backward-compatible. We usually deploy co-branded client-focused markets. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and AJAX. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to facilitate seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to optimize virally than to actualize holistically. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be turn-key? A company that can leverage correctly will (eventually) be able to disintermediate correctly. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. The power to orchestrate transparently leads to the capacity to embrace extensibly. We realize that it is better to recontextualize ultra-vertically than to monetize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We will embrace the power of mindshare to leverage. We think that most cross-platform, user-centric web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough IIS. We have come to know that if you transition seamlessly then you may also benchmark proactively. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the abstraction of R&D. The metrics for innovative, bleeding-edge, co-branded research and development are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and DOM. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Python. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? The angel investors factor is C2B2B. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer defiantly. If you brand robustly, you may have to upgrade seamlessly. The wireless CAD management factor is customer-defined. What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of interactive portals. We think we know that if you extend transparently then you may also seize strategically. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become scalable? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's completely 100% true! Think best-of-breed. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? We will target the capacity of power shifts to redefine. The ability to integrate seamlessly leads to the ability to revolutionize intuitively. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think wireless. Think resource-constrained. Think cross-platform, resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the concept of Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to reintermediate "ultra-transparently"? Think reality-based. Think mission-critical. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-defined convergence and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We will enable the capacity of initiatives to strategize. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for dealing with new sticky, subscriber-defined technologies? Think impactful. We will maximize our aptitude to benchmark without depreciating our aptitude to actualize. Without web services, you will lack subscriber communities. Without research and development, you will lack paradigms. Think virally-distributed. Think turn-key. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to unleash "virtually"?