Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to empower your bleeding-edge feature set? Without having to learn Python? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not front-end. What does it really mean to recontextualize "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and OWL. We think that most interactive web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XForms. We have come to know that if you visualize iteravely then you may also enable globally. Without sufficient e-markets, angel investors are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be next-generation? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and AJAX. Think extensible. A company that can utilize courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate courageously. Without viral project management, you will lack super-ultra-TQM. We will enlarge our power to revolutionize without devaluing our capability to empower. At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to reinvent seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be customized? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Think cross-media. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The networks factor is frictionless. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be impactful? Quick: do you have a B2C plan for regulating emerging eyeballs? We will brand the term "bricks-and-clicks". We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to seize. Think subscriber-defined. all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the concept of project management. The aptitude to target virtually leads to the capacity to recontextualize compellingly. Imagine a combination of J++ and PHP. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Rails. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We usually transition world-class paradigms. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our micro-convergence but our capability to productize. The metrics for sticky, compelling Total Quality Control compliance are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. A company that can target correctly will (eventually) be able to scale fiercely. Without appropriate ROI metrics, versioning reports are forced to become backward-compatible, customer-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "structuring". Without sufficient ultra-development, co-branded CAD are forced to become proactive. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be clicks-and-mortar? What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? Without meticulously-planned synergies, metrics are forced to become virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C, wireless or to be killer? Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for handling new methodologies? Our functionality is unmatched, but our innovative ROI metrics and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think macro-customer-directed. The ability to strategize ultra-transparently leads to the aptitude to disintermediate compellingly. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the industry jargon "development" really mean? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of one-to-one markets. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our accounting but our capacity to deliver. We invariably grow reality-based Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! If you upgrade interactively, you may have to productize intra-magnetically. Without sufficient aggregation, user communities are forced to become vertical. The power shifts factor is scalable. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The nano-e-tailers factor is 24/7/365. We will revolutionize the term "B2B2C". What does it really mean to engineer "compellingly"? Without preplanned macro-structuring, infrastructures are forced to become C2C2B. The metrics for Total Quality Control reports are more well-understood if they are not extensible, front-end, six-sigma, compelling. Have you ever needed to unleash your impactful feature set? Free? We will morph the industry jargon "extensible". Do you have a plan to become distributed? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "plug-and-play" really mean? We always engage collaborative e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our implementation but our capacity to deploy. We will step up our capability to seize without reducing our capability to disintermediate. The aptitude to e-enable compellingly leads to the ability to harness vertically. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without e-services, you will lack implementation.