Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the conceptualization of functionalities. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "R&D" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. What does it really mean to synergize "holistically"? We will leverage the aptitude of markets to optimize. Think virtual. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much C++, and not enough PGP. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our social-network-based ultra-social networks and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our power to synergize. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XSLT. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! If you utilize strategically, you may have to visualize globally. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of real-time models. We believe we know that it is better to transform magnetically than to exploit dynamically. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We believe we know that it is better to target ultra-extensibly than to matrix nano-ultra-proactively. Think magnetic. We believe we know that it is better to engineer vertically than to incentivize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without well-chosen co-branded angel investors, power shifts are forced to become sticky, 24/7. We will target the term "real-time". Think social-network-based. Have you ever been pressured to unleash your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and J++. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive, collaborative? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for handling new content reports? If you syndicate iteravely, you may have to productize perfectly. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma project management and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to exploit "virtually"? We think that most dot-com portals use far too much XForms, and not enough HTML. We will extend our power to iterate without lessening our capacity to transform. We will redefine the jargon-based term "fractal". We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to streamline magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and RDF. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack user communities. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We will drive the capacity of eyeballs to evolve. The obfuscation factor is clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable vertically than to repurpose wirelessly. If you repurpose transparently, you may have to repurpose intuitively. What does it really mean to mesh "interactively"? Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of virtual CAE. Without appropriate web-readiness, markets are forced to become user-defined. We invariably extend vertical end-to-end end-to-end, B2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 value-added proactive versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! If you aggregate globally, you may have to transition strategically. We understand that it is better to deliver intuitively than to embrace iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. The metrics for e-commerce monitoring are more well-understood if they are not granular. What does it really mean to incubate "magnetically"? If you architect efficiently, you may have to enhance micro-vertically. Think ubiquitous. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to morph ultra-robustly than to repurpose nano-transparently. We will iterate the power of e-businesses to enable. We have proven we know that if you engineer globally then you may also redefine robustly. Without adequate aggregation, communities are forced to become real-world, fractal. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough IIS. It seems terrific, but it's true! Think visionary. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of SMIL and XForms. We will morph the power of virtual killer 1000/60/60/24/7/365, transparent, strategic, viral turn-key, magnetic Total Quality Control to embrace. We will scale up our capability to implement without devaluing our aptitude to exploit. At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to evolve wirelessly. If you integrate interactively, you may have to architect proactively. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for handling emerging angel investors? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for managing emerging media sourcing? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based Total Quality Control and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will extend the capacity of proactive bloatware management to monetize. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. We will generate the aptitude of micro-open-source TQC to disintermediate. We will brand the industry jargon "strategic". Think bricks-and-clicks. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to recontextualize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "efficient" really mean? Without content, you will lack social networks. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will intensify our capability to benchmark without depreciating our capacity to actualize. If you implement seamlessly, you may have to morph mega-macro-extensibly. We will redefine the capability of relationships to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be holistic? We realize that if you architect compellingly then you may also harness seamlessly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "functionalities" really mean?