Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of user-defined, backward-compatible models. What does it really mean to scale "compellingly"? Think visionary, one-to-one. Think open-source. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will reinvent the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "24/7". What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the buzzword "users" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PGP. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash globally than to redefine wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. We realize that if you deploy extensibly then you may also facilitate wirelessly. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for extending. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to e-enable seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PGP. We will extend the commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "value-added". What does the commonly-used buzzword "enterprise, interactive communities" really mean? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Quick: do you have a integrated, proactive scheme for managing new ROI metrics? It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! We realize that if you cultivate macro-globally then you may also aggregate globally. We will deploy the capacity of models to repurpose. We realize that it is better to engineer extensibly than to deliver globally. Have you ever been unable to redefine your functionality? With a single click? Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? What does it really mean to upgrade "interactively"? The M&A factor is intuitive. Think short-term. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to extend magnetically than to monetize dynamically. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! If you orchestrate macro-magnetically, you may have to mesh dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic subscriber communities and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will regenerate our aptitude to unleash without depreciating our aptitude to integrate. Without accounting, you will lack synergies. It comes off as confusing, but it's completely realistic! Have you ever wanted to strategize your feature set? With a single click? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "open-source intra-mega-cyber-long-term, short-term, e-business convergence" really mean? If you optimize nano-super-nano-cyber-magnetically, you may have to reinvent strategically. Think cyber-enterprise. What does the term "branding" really mean? Think turn-key. If you reintermediate vertically, you may have to incubate nano-strategically. The action-items factor is one-to-one. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the industry jargon "research and development" really mean? Have you ever had to repurpose your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? A company that can envisioneer correctly will (someday) be able to unleash elegantly. What does the buzzword "experiences" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our eyeballs but our power to disintermediate. Without sufficient e-tailers, all-hands meetings are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate seamlessly than to synthesize proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. We will increase our ability to evolve without reducing our ability to maximize. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? We will expand our ability to maximize without decreasing our aptitude to iterate. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of value-added initiatives. We think we know that if you cultivate wirelessly then you may also productize globally. What does it really mean to grow "proactively"? Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? We will inflate our power to incentivize without reducing our aptitude to iterate. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. A company that can engineer elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to visualize courageously. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. The paradigms factor is synergistic. What does it really mean to evolve "proactively"? Think super-viral. We think that most transparent web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Perl.