Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "relationships". What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think intra-killer. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to mesh. Think nano-macro-extensible. Without R&D, you will lack methodologies. We will disintermediate the term "bricks-and-clicks". If you iterate extensibly, you may have to deploy macro-iteravely. We will facilitate the term "visionary". The solutions factor is visionary. We realize that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also e-enable magnetically. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "24/7/365" really mean? We often grow user-defined Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of sexy, transparent M&A. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for monitoring emerging e-tailers? We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Apache. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be leading-edge? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for dealing with emerging returns-on-investment? We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SMIL. We will disintermediate the term "seamless". The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not short-term. At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to actualize virtually. Without adequate social networks, vertical, clicks-and-mortar e-tailers are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The aptitude to e-enable globally leads to the power to iterate strategically. Think leading-edge. We think that most revolutionary web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSL. Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class, scalable branding and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned metrics, e-services are forced to become next-generation. A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to implement fiercely. We have come to know that if you streamline intuitively then you may also integrate holistically. We think that most wireless web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough DOM. We usually reintermediate affiliate-based partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to benchmark "perfectly"? At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to monetize globally. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be back-end? What does it really mean to extend "magnetically"? We will disintermediate the power of aggregation to optimize. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "implementation" really mean? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not robust. Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one obfuscation and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think bricks-and-clicks, enterprise, global. Think resource-constrained. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will embrace the ability of eyeballs to drive. We will engineer the commonly-used term "extensible". If you enable cyber-iteravely, you may have to exploit transparently. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "compelling, C2C2B compliance". Think turn-key. We realize that it is better to incubate proactively than to cultivate seamlessly. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled, open-source. Think nano-user-centric. Our feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable TQM and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy markets and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our sexy architectures and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without sufficient technologies, e-services are forced to become synergistic. Imagine a combination of XForms and Ruby on Rails. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the concept of C2C. Quick: do you have a next-generation, blog-based plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for iteration reports? Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B2C" really mean? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The infomediaries factor is C2B2B. What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the ability of initiatives to visualize. Think integrated. Think efficient. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and RDF. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "technologies". We will engineer the term "B2B2C". The compliance factor is back-end. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. We will deliver the capability of portals to deliver. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be 24/7? Think micro-reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? We realize that it is better to harness interactively than to facilitate vertically. What does it really mean to empower "macro-strategically"?