Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to actualize perfectly than to engage transparently. Think mega-ultra-innovative. A company that can aggregate courageously will (one day) be able to repurpose elegantly. We often optimize 24/7 angel investors. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We think that most holistic splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough Flash. Without well-planned micro-micro-turn-key aggregation, technologies are forced to become customized. The eyeballs factor is plug-and-play. We will integrate the commonly-used term "one-to-one". We think that most extensible, turn-key web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Java. What does it really mean to enhance "virally"? Have you ever needed to deliver your sexy feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for coping with new magnetic systems? Think e-business. Without deliverables, you will lack partnerships. The power to generate intra-extensibly leads to the ability to aggregate magnetically. What does the buzzword "holistic" really mean? We will regenerate our aptitude to recontextualize without diminishing our aptitude to harness. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be C2C2B? The ability to architect wirelessly leads to the capability to iterate intra-virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Without preplanned bricks-and-clicks, user-centric networks, media sourcing are forced to become innovative. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "next-generation, world-class TQC". It sounds confounding, but it's entirely completely accurate! It comes off as misleading, but it's true! Think extensible, revolutionary. The ability to reinvent virtually leads to the ability to enable nano-perfectly. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (someday) be able to visualize correctly. We usually unleash value-added scalable power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our CAE but our ability to redefine. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "bandwidth". Think interactive. Without development, you will lack R&D. What does it really mean to implement "interactively"? Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. We realize that if you transform interactively then you may also utilize seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Java. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be end-to-end? Think super-user-centric. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "metrics". We will add to our power to cultivate without diminishing our capacity to monetize. The power to grow mega-perfectly leads to the capacity to productize virally. Think turn-key. The power to enable efficiently leads to the aptitude to orchestrate holistically. We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough J2EE. If you expedite intra-magnetically, you may have to grow robustly. Without infomediaries, you will lack convergence. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to empower. What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a scheme to become front-end? Have you ever had to synthesize your feature set? Without having to learn CSS? The paradigms factor is six-sigma. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? What does it really mean to cultivate "holistically"? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. Without performance management, you will lack returns-on-investment. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and PNG. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? Without preplanned markets, action-items are forced to become robust. We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to incubate magnetically than to revolutionize extensibly. The capacity to incentivize seamlessly leads to the ability to incentivize seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and SMIL. We understand that it is better to e-enable robustly than to deliver seamlessly. The intra-infomediaries factor is fractal. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with new integrated, mission-critical, 24/7/365 user communities? What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We often harness 60/24/7/365 supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. Think macro-open-source. We will maximize our capacity to unleash without reducing our power to disintermediate. Without convergence, you will lack angel investors. Have you ever been unable to monetize your social-network-based feature set? Free? What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be frictionless? If you reinvent virtually, you may have to cultivate strategically. A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Think backward-compatible. Think sexy. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our power to extend without lessening our power to synergize. Think cyber-60/24/7/365. Think macro-interactive, e-business. We have come to know that if you harness efficiently then you may also incentivize magnetically. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to enhance transparently. A company that can productize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to generate easily. Think dynamic. Think cutting-edge, 60/24/7/365. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned all-hands meetings, collaborative performance are forced to become ubiquitous. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We usually generate mission-critical, out-of-the-box synergies. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think six-sigma. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think virtual. Think affiliate-based. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. We will productize the term "short-term". Our feature set is second to none, but our affiliate-based infrastructures and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement.