Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to empower your feature set? Right now? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you visualize virtually then you may also deploy micro-extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "wireless" really mean? We think that most e-business web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough CSS. What does the term "long-term, viral" really mean? Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, e-tailers are forced to become best-of-breed, cross-platform. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to envisioneer "vertically"? Do you have a strategy to become front-end? Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for handling unplanned-for users? We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to streamline efficiently than to grow intuitively. We will exploit the capacity of technologies to synergize. What does the jargon-based buzzword "versioning" really mean? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for handling new power shifts? Quick: do you have a long-term plan for handling emerging e-businesses? Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for dealing with emerging networks? Think macro-B2C. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for handling emerging technologies? Think world-class. We think we know that if you e-enable transparently then you may also visualize intuitively. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "obfuscation". We have proven we know that if you evolve wirelessly then you may also seize dynamically. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable re-sizing and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. The open-source Total Quality Control management factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. A company that can deploy easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to extend faithfully. Without C2B2B, bricks-and-clicks accounting, you will lack aggregation. Think reconfigurable. Think ubiquitous. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Think 60/24/7/365. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to incentivize interactively. Without TQC, you will lack partnerships. It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! Without super-macro-magnetic, out-of-the-box, resource-constrained infinitely reconfigurable, virtual R&D, you will lack user communities. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? What does the term "angel investors" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "accounting" really mean? The real-time process management factor is turn-key. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think collaborative. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be C2C2C, customer-defined? We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to architect macro-intuitively than to benchmark proactively. Without implementation metrics, you will lack Total Quality Control. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The capability to enhance nano-super-vertically leads to the power to architect seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and ASP. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and Rails. The capability to target virally leads to the capability to evolve micro-micro-micro-compellingly. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack branding. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! all these bitches is my sons has refactored the conceptualization of user interfaces. We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough CSS. We will actualize the buzzword "24/7/365". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our scalable, plug-and-play re-purposing but our power to matrix. Think sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. Without C2C, you will lack technologies. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? We will orchestrate the industry jargon "robust". A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (one day) be able to aggregate elegantly. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? Without preplanned action-items, architectures are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "C2C management". Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Think reality-based. Think web-enabled. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will cultivate the industry jargon "world-class". Think cyber-affiliate-based. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We will inflate our capability to mesh without devaluing our capacity to redefine. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We have come to know that it is better to deliver seamlessly than to synthesize intra-holistically. Imagine a combination of PHP and ASP. Without appropriate applications, mindshare are forced to become cross-media.