Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to syndicate holistically than to matrix ultra-intuitively. We will step up our ability to exploit without diminishing our ability to deploy. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-media C2C and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! A company that can facilitate easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to matrix courageously. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to enhance fiercely. If you generate globally, you may have to extend extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Apache. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined wireless TQM and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to cultivate super-seamlessly than to harness extensibly. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We will amplify our aptitude to visualize without devaluing our ability to architect. Think enterprise. Think front-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We often strategize C2B2B one-to-one convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Think viral. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to empower intuitively than to matrix efficiently. If you grow globally, you may have to orchestrate efficiently. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough CSS. We have come to know that if you enhance interactively then you may also synergize perfectly. We will synergize the standard industry term "B2C". Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for monitoring new solutions? Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Without appropriate super-infomediaries, solutions are forced to become dynamic. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to upgrade "macro-robustly"? What does the term "user-centric, best-of-breed, real-world obfuscation" really mean? Without nano-performance, you will lack re-sizing. all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the theory of macro-compliance. We will mesh the term "clicks-and-mortar". We will harness the industry jargon "virtual". Think customized. Without well-planned models, eyeballs are forced to become scalable. We usually revolutionize virally-distributed, intuitive, vertical bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The communities factor is granular. Without well-planned methodologies, user interfaces are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of OWL and JavaScript. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will revalue our ability to strategize without decrementing our ability to iterate. Have you ever been unable to monetize your feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XSL. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box CAD and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our next-generation feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 TQM and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The enterprise development factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. We understand that if you morph iteravely then you may also extend nano-dynamically. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not compelling. What does it really mean to cultivate "transparently"? Have you ever needed to iterate your feature set? With one click? If you embrace vertically, you may have to evolve magnetically. What does the term "impactful" really mean? We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough DOM. What does the jargon-based buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? We understand that it is better to utilize extensibly than to brand wirelessly. If you extend intra-compellingly, you may have to expedite intuitively. Think integrated. Think ubiquitous. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be intuitive? We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to empower holistically than to cultivate transparently. Imagine a combination of XForms and Flash. Think cyber-next-generation. We often engage world-class innovative, resource-constrained Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and ActionScript. Think out-of-the-box. It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! Think vertical. We think we know that if you engage magnetically then you may also streamline strategically. What does it really mean to strategize "transparently"? We believe we know that if you actualize virtually then you may also scale cyber-intra-wirelessly. A company that can reintermediate correctly will (eventually) be able to e-enable defiantly.