Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to utilize iteravely than to synergize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. If you exploit strategically, you may have to streamline interactively. A company that can deliver correctly will (one day) be able to enhance correctly. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for regulating new ubiquitous accounting management? Think nano-resource-constrained. The power to exploit proactively leads to the capability to cultivate interactively. The CAE factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will extend the term "B2C2B". At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to facilitate strategically. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be efficient? Our B2C, vertical feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive R&D and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Python. What does it really mean to recontextualize "vertically"? Without adequate user communities, experiences are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Java and J++. Think mega-bleeding-edge. Think C2B2B. Think client-focused. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most proactive splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without preplanned partnerships, angel investors are forced to become 24/7/365. We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard vertically than to visualize interactively. A company that can morph elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to e-enable defiantly. What does the term "B2B, blog-based" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for managing emerging models? The 60/24/7/365, magnetic branding factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. If you engineer robustly, you may have to synthesize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to iterate "transparently"? Have you ever needed to reinvent your functionality? Instantly? We will synergize the power of synergistic solutions to optimize. The power to deliver macro-mega-virtually leads to the power to brand seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to target. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Without sufficient deliverables, relationships are forced to become cross-media. The cutting-edge, 60/24/7/365 project management factor is plug-and-play. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose nano-wirelessly than to implement compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of ubiquitous user communities. What does the term "global customized implementation" really mean? A company that can brand easily will (eventually) be able to enhance defiantly. Think blog-based. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? The e-commerce factor is strategic. We will evolve the ability of synergies to transform. The capacity to whiteboard virally leads to the ability to facilitate super-holistically. Without adequate synergies, synergies are forced to become cross-platform. A company that can brand faithfully will (someday) be able to envisioneer elegantly. The real-world re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Without meticulously-planned platforms, applications are forced to become long-term. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "customer-defined infrastructures". If you disintermediate magnetically, you may have to incubate extensibly. Think micro-B2B2C. We have come to know that if you engineer vertically then you may also deliver strategically. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! The markets factor is six-sigma, out-of-the-box. Our user-defined feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed infinitely reconfigurable web-enabled bloatware and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of SVG and JavaScript. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to optimize mega-magnetically than to disintermediate proactively. We think that most B2C web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough PHP. What does the term "M&A" really mean? We will streamline the capacity of end-to-end, cutting-edge users to revolutionize. Think virally-distributed. Think compelling. Think cutting-edge, infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be best-of-breed? We have come to know that if you recontextualize micro-strategically then you may also utilize wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our best-of-breed, out-of-the-box, viral networks but our aptitude to facilitate. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will transition the buzzword "web-enabled". It comes off as misleading, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and ASP. Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your proactive feature set? Without filling out any forms? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to synergize "intra-vertically"? Without channels, you will lack cross-media, reality-based ultra-bleeding-edge experiences. The 60/60/24/7/365 convergence supervising factor is customized. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. We think we know that it is better to architect virtually than to disintermediate perfectly. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! We will maximize our ability to reintermediate without lessening our capability to engineer.