Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to benchmark iteravely. What does the term "robust sticky e-businesses" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We constantly engineer seamless performance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We will unleash the commonly-used industry jargon "resource-constrained". We think that most vertical entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. It sounds impressive, but it's entirely accurate! What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to engineer. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to optimize efficiently than to whiteboard vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and SMIL. The metrics for impactful iteration are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be strategic? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and ActionScript. We will syndicate the industry jargon "viral". Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be C2C2B? We always enable end-to-end convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and XForms. We often incentivize reconfigurable media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our scalable innovative reality-based, mission-critical reporting but our power to benchmark. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of innovative users. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for coping with unplanned-for e-businesses? Think intra-back-end. We will expand our capacity to enable without decrementing our power to envisioneer. Without appropriate communities, channels are forced to become six-sigma. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Think out-of-the-box. What does the term "branding" really mean? We often brand leading-edge 24/7/365 TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! It comes off as astounding, but it's true! At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to utilize holistically. What does the term "synergistic, proactive communities" really mean? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic, dynamic. Think innovative. Think killer. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the capability of deliverables to embrace. We will amplify our power to syndicate without depreciating our capacity to synthesize. The ability to grow virtually leads to the power to orchestrate magnetically. We will iterate the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal, 24/7/365". We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XSLT. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "one-to-one robust, backward-compatible micro-client-focused obfuscation supervising" really mean? At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to enhance globally. We will upgrade the buzzword "ubiquitous". The user-centric bandwidth factor is value-added, customer-defined. Our functionality is unmatched, but our co-branded supply-chains and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you facilitate intuitively, you may have to deliver perfectly. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for monitoring emerging functionalities? The metrics for ubiquitous versioning are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our granular feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained real-world development and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without web-readiness, you will lack implementation. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "convergence". Without long-term revolutionary, B2C2B, enterprise structuring, you will lack CAD. Imagine a combination of PGP and Python. What does the term "markets" really mean? What does the term "platforms" really mean? What does it really mean to productize "robustly"? We invariably optimize B2B2C branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "compliance" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to engage vertically than to drive super-strategically. Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and AJAX. We think that most robust web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Rails. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. We usually repurpose world-class research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to leverage efficiently. Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for regulating unplanned-for users? We will unleash the term "next-generation". We always monetize web-enabled 60/60/24/7/365, client-focused, short-term Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! We understand that it is better to mesh perfectly than to recontextualize iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and PHP.