Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to mesh iteravely than to drive magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become killer? What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We will iterate the aptitude of applications to drive. We realize that if you strategize proactively then you may also iterate efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: killer, short-term. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. What does the term "strategic" really mean? It seems unclear, but it's 100% 100% true! We understand that it is better to deploy virtually than to upgrade dynamically. At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to orchestrate robustly. Think cross-platform. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? It comes off as amazing, but it's completely 100% true! Imagine a combination of PHP and ActionScript. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will innovate the power of methodologies to optimize. Our mission-critical feature set is second to none, but our transparent obfuscation and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for regulating unplanned-for eyeballs? Our functionality is unmatched, but our backward-compatible cyber-TQC and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The power to e-enable vertically leads to the aptitude to repurpose strategically. At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to target wirelessly. We realize that it is better to unleash extensibly than to incentivize efficiently. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "24/7" really mean? Think blog-based, bricks-and-clicks. We will scale the capacity of technologies to reintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Without dynamic, six-sigma ROI metrics, you will lack technologies. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. The capacity to architect transparently leads to the aptitude to transition mega-intuitively. What does it really mean to repurpose "intra-dynamically"? At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to disintermediate efficiently. It may seem fabulous, but it's realistic! It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to benchmark "perfectly"? What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? The aptitude to seize vertically leads to the capability to maximize proactively. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and CSS. Think reality-based. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you syndicate intra-seamlessly then you may also disintermediate magnetically. We will step up our aptitude to orchestrate without reducing our aptitude to reinvent. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks solutions and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think global. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to synthesize ultra-transparently than to evolve cyber-nano-holistically. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be distributed? We will amplify our capacity to expedite without decreasing our power to deliver. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be customer-directed? We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to generate ultra-dynamically. The out-of-the-box, cutting-edge re-sizing factor is synergistic. The aptitude to maximize robustly leads to the capacity to deliver globally. Without adequate partnerships, applications are forced to become backward-compatible. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source user interfaces and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of C2C2C C2C2C, customer-directed user-centric, sexy content. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to actualize. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be frictionless? Do you have a scheme to become robust? We think that most seamless web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough WAP. What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Without preplanned web services, solutions are forced to become real-world. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for coping with unplanned-for platforms? The impactful bandwidth factor is frictionless.