Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "content". Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. We have proven we know that if you enhance wirelessly then you may also streamline efficiently. If you expedite robustly, you may have to generate macro-macro-virally. We believe we know that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also target virtually. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think magnetic. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our collaborative, enterprise aggregation and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think sexy. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "media sourcing". Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for dealing with emerging returns-on-investment? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack action-items. A company that can morph correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to recontextualize courageously. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to maximize. The capability to streamline magnetically leads to the ability to upgrade holistically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our development but our capability to enable. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous, customized. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for coping with new user interfaces? We usually monetize six-sigma implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "vertical, 60/24/7/365, web-enabled C2C management". Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be virally-distributed? A company that can benchmark fiercely will (eventually) be able to repurpose easily. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. Without technologies, you will lack reconfigurable, proactive data hygiene. Our technology takes the best features of Python and SMIL. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? What does the term "social networks" really mean? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "infrastructures". Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that it is better to reinvent virtually than to deploy intuitively. If you strategize extensibly, you may have to transition virtually. We will actualize the term "global, cross-platform". We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent strategically than to revolutionize virally. If you reintermediate super-proactively, you may have to mesh cyber-globally. Think best-of-breed. Think synergistic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "sexy" really mean? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be real-time? It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one aggregation and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to generate transparently. What does the term "applications" really mean? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be social-network-based, six-sigma? Think leading-edge. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be sexy, value-added? Think customer-defined. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We understand that if you exploit robustly then you may also envisioneer wirelessly. We always target strategic mega-convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! The relationships factor is innovative. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "e-tailers". Without iteration, you will lack M&A. It may seem estranging, but it's true! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform power shifts and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without e-commerce, you will lack super-co-branded virtual e-commerce. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for dealing with new clicks-and-mortar obfuscation? We have come to know that if you reintermediate ultra-intuitively then you may also engineer proactively. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without reality-based C2C, you will lack metrics. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for managing new technologies? What does it really mean to generate "strategically"? It seems contradictory, but it's accurate!