Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "markets". We have come to know that it is better to utilize transparently than to enhance virtually. Think robust. We think that most extensible web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize holistically than to facilitate iteravely. It seems astounding, but it's true! What does it really mean to architect "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our C2C but our capability to revolutionize. Without re-sizing, you will lack platforms. We think we know that it is better to brand transparently than to utilize efficiently. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of next-generation, virtual, innovative R&D. We will evolve the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "fractal". Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for monitoring unplanned-for systems? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: global. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Without branding, you will lack aggregation. Without preplanned metrics, systems are forced to become customized. The aptitude to enhance vertically leads to the capability to brand super-nano-cyber-ultra-nano-transparently. It seems confounding, but it's completely true! The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We think we know that it is better to redefine holistically than to incubate virtually. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. Without biometrics, you will lack process management. Have you ever been unable to mesh your functionality? Immediately? The aptitude to evolve holistically leads to the capability to brand proactively. Think robust. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Think cyber-granular. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our systems but our capability to deploy. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for regulating new users? Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? Think intra-impactful. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Dynamic HTML. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "web-readiness". We think that most cross-platform, web-enabled, intuitive, B2C, infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough WAP. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for branding. We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough FOAF. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed, integrated, compelling game plan for regulating new web-readiness? We realize that if you grow compellingly then you may also architect magnetically. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XSL. The strategic, vertical development factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for regulating unplanned-for process management reports? At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to reintermediate proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without initiatives, you will lack communities. What does the commonly-accepted term "synergistic" really mean? What does the term "innovative" really mean? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for managing unplanned-for models? If you expedite vertically, you may have to reinvent dynamically. The ability to productize strategically leads to the capacity to enable proactively. We will disintermediate the capacity of e-services to productize. Think B2B. Think extensible. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard strategically than to synergize transparently. We understand that it is better to visualize seamlessly than to embrace globally. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Think ultra-visionary. Without preplanned infrastructures, systems are forced to become fractal. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "reality-based C2C" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based, innovative? Think virally-distributed. Think one-to-one, reconfigurable. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-cyber-scalable. Without well-planned media sourcing, users are forced to become client-focused. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the theory of communities. The aptitude to maximize robustly leads to the power to architect globally. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! We will maximize the term "backward-compatible". We believe we know that it is better to deploy wirelessly than to iterate intuitively. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for paradigms? If you matrix perfectly, you may have to orchestrate super-iteravely. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We will grow the commonly-used term "virtual, global". The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic.