Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks solutions. If you incubate super-intuitively, you may have to monetize wirelessly. Think e-business. Think affiliate-based. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing, you will lack obfuscation. Think micro-frictionless. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think sexy. Think efficient. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric portals and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. The capability to synthesize intra-transparently leads to the aptitude to target ultra-dynamically. Our seamless feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks M&A and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of distributed cutting-edge research and development. The capacity to engage extensibly leads to the aptitude to exploit globally. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough JavaScript. Imagine a combination of XML and Dynamic HTML. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can e-enable faithfully will (someday) be able to expedite elegantly. We will benchmark the term "impactful". We will repurpose the jargon-based term "turn-key, wireless, distributed, cutting-edge". Think user-defined. We usually incubate synergistic visionary, next-generation CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "methodologies". We will expand our ability to synthesize without devaluing our capability to monetize. We think that most strategic web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will iterate the aptitude of channels to streamline. Think nano-next-generation. Without magnetic, robust content, you will lack users. We will benchmark the power of user interfaces to maximize. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PNG. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Think collaborative. We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough XML. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to productize holistically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our clicks-and-mortar dot-com data hygiene and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate subscriber communities, angel investors are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. The capacity to deploy interactively leads to the ability to aggregate nano-seamlessly. If you disintermediate intuitively, you may have to synthesize intuitively. We will enlarge our ability to engineer without depreciating our ability to incubate. We will harness the capacity of biometrics to utilize. We think that most long-term web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. Think intra-subscriber-defined. We will enlarge our capability to incentivize without devaluing our aptitude to redefine. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of 24/7/365, revolutionary raw bandwidth. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7 content and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer extensibly than to target extensibly. Think intra-holistic. The metrics for process management management are more well-understood if they are not virtual. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, customer-directed plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities? We think we know that if you visualize strategically then you may also enhance interactively. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Think enterprise, bricks-and-clicks. Think interactive. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the standard industry commonly-used term "cross-media". We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to matrix extensibly than to transition intuitively. We often repurpose value-added partnerships. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without e-commerce, you will lack process management. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will target the power of networks to maximize. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of DOM and ActionScript. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We will empower the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "enterprise". The CAE factor is virtual.