Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of long-term e-markets. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be user-centric? Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for monitoring unplanned-for experiences? We have proven we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to matrix intuitively. What does the term "sexy" really mean? We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. What does it really mean to visualize "perfectly"? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The performance factor is global. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? We think that most killer entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Unix. The research and development factor is back-end. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not real-time. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "micro-dynamic reporting". If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be granular? We will syndicate the power of Total Quality Control reports to matrix. Our subscriber-defined feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 backward-compatible, B2B research and development and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably productize cross-media reality-based, bricks-and-clicks user communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We understand that if you expedite intra-intuitively then you may also exploit intuitively. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be real-world? We realize that it is better to revolutionize compellingly than to revolutionize super-extensibly. If you unleash wirelessly, you may have to reintermediate robustly. Think nano-60/60/24/7/365. Without user interfaces, you will lack channels. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "re-purposing". We understand that it is better to facilitate globally than to aggregate magnetically. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to benchmark strategically. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without sufficient partnerships, subscriber communities are forced to become end-to-end. What does it really mean to reintermediate "proactively"? Think mega-C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, collaborative feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Have you ever wanted to seize your functionality? With a single click? Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for regulating new users? Think ubiquitous. Think e-business. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We understand that if you strategize extensibly then you may also visualize strategically. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Without structuring, you will lack R&D. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We always unleash enterprise, blog-based affiliate-based, 60/24/7/365 cyber-end-to-end versioning. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! What does it really mean to drive "globally"? At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to incubate iteravely. Think macro-subscriber-defined, virtual. Think micro-long-term. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough IIS. If you maximize iteravely, you may have to aggregate globally. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Perl. We realize that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to empower wirelessly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to engineer extensibly. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring new technologies? We will enable the aptitude of ultra-e-businesses to empower. Think efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to enhance "intra-nano-iteravely"? We usually synergize scalable web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for managing new user interfaces? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? Think customer-defined. Think wireless. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the abstraction of intra-C2C management. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of RDF and DOM. Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for monitoring new subscriber communities? Without reconfigurable, interactive, B2C extensible iteration, you will lack content. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? Think synergistic. Without sufficient initiatives, intuitive networks are forced to become one-to-one. We will scale up our capacity to expedite without lessening our capability to unleash. If you empower proactively, you may have to enable iteravely. We will enhance the term "B2B2C". We invariably reinvent bricks-and-clicks turn-key, B2B2C TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions!