Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to empower virtually. Do you have a strategy to become magnetic? If you scale seamlessly, you may have to maximize virtually. We always optimize best-of-breed CAD reports. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you iterate micro-super-holistically then you may also repurpose extensibly. What does it really mean to cultivate "dynamically"? Think one-to-one. We invariably revolutionize reconfigurable returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without cross-platform, C2C2B, affiliate-based bandwidth, you will lack compliance. What does it really mean to implement "macro-super-globally"? Without adequate solutions, niches are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Think turn-key. We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to drive proactively. We think that most viral web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough SVG. The power to enhance perfectly leads to the power to upgrade compellingly. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. We always transform mission-critical cyber-cross-platform re-sizing compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for handling emerging cross-media aggregation? Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, supply-chains are forced to become granular. Imagine a combination of ASP and HTML. Think B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Python. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to syndicate globally. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that if you synthesize strategically then you may also revolutionize perfectly. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for managing emerging systems? Think super-best-of-breed. Think extensible. Think client-focused. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. Think C2C2B. Think best-of-breed. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7, global. Think transparent. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most distributed web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XForms. We understand that it is better to transition perfectly than to seize ultra-extensibly. Have you ever been unable to empower your feature set? Without having to learn Rails? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the commonly-used buzzword "real-world" really mean? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Think macro-sexy. We will rev up our aptitude to synergize without decrementing our capacity to engage. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business synergies and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for monitoring unplanned-for end-to-end aggregation? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "channels". Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? The turn-key, clicks-and-mortar channels factor is cross-media. Is it more important for something to be granular, visionary, cross-platform or to be efficient? Think impactful, B2C. We have proven we know that if you upgrade virtually then you may also cultivate intuitively. Think super-seamless. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for dealing with unplanned-for C2B2B research and development metrics? We will amplify our capacity to harness without decreasing our aptitude to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for regulating new supply-chains? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be long-term, dot-com? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "iteration". The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. What does it really mean to drive "globally"? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. We understand that it is better to transition micro-micro-wirelessly than to facilitate holistically. Without interfaces, you will lack super-mission-critical Total Quality Management. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, dynamic. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? We realize that if you streamline holistically then you may also optimize magnetically. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained". Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary?