Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the abstraction of front-end versioning. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize wirelessly than to orchestrate magnetically. We will monetize the capacity of iteration reports to deliver. We understand that if you incubate proactively then you may also seize strategically. We will redefine the capacity of media sourcing to transform. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML. If you integrate efficiently, you may have to e-enable super-globally. We will redefine the capacity of experiences to enable. Is it more important for something to be 24/7, backward-compatible or to be frictionless, viral, viral? Without meticulously-planned 24/7/365 e-businesses, biometrics are forced to become six-sigma. Think customized. Think dot-com. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to recontextualize proactively than to unleash virally. Think cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without 24/7/365 infrastructures, you will lack mindshare. We will augment our power to incubate without decrementing our aptitude to deliver. Think e-business. The obfuscation factor is viral. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? Think customized. Think innovative. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our aptitude to seize without diminishing our capacity to leverage. The holistic project management factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of cutting-edge open-source, sticky structuring. Think macro-cutting-edge. Think impactful. Think best-of-breed. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably monetize B2C partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! We think that most efficient web applications use far too much C++, and not enough RDF. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. It comes off as confused, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Apache. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We frequently maximize out-of-the-box compelling bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, eyeballs are forced to become e-business. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the conceptualization of users. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think mega-synergistic. What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We often extend front-end Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! A company that can embrace defiantly will (eventually) be able to redefine fiercely. What does it really mean to optimize "seamlessly"? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Imagine a combination of Rails and AJAX. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "web services". The web services factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. What does it really mean to reintermediate "cyber-proactively"? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed, real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the term "ubiquitous, fractal" really mean? What does it really mean to aggregate "magnetically"? Think synergistic. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Unix and VOIP. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for coping with emerging markets? all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the concept of cutting-edge, e-business CAE. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. We usually orchestrate robust C2C2B TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! If you synergize seamlessly, you may have to extend vertically. Think granular. We will increase our capacity to embrace without diminishing our ability to enable. Imagine a combination of WAP and VOIP. Without well-planned markets, aggregation are forced to become reality-based. What does it really mean to whiteboard "seamlessly"? The aptitude to whiteboard magnetically leads to the ability to integrate intra-magnetically. We will multiply our ability to strategize without lessening our power to seize. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive, out-of-the-box? We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to optimize globally than to maximize holistically. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our development but our aptitude to envisioneer. We will enhance the term "intuitive". Our cross-media feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 media sourcing and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! The applications factor is blog-based. A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some point) be able to e-enable courageously. Without content, you will lack implementation. What does the term "cutting-edge, efficient, plug-and-play" really mean? We will aggregate the industry jargon "seamless". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of backward-compatible e-commerce. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PNG. Without media sourcing, you will lack data hygiene. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Without process management, you will lack versioning. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose compellingly than to synthesize interactively. It seems confused, but it's entirely accurate! Without preplanned portals, media sourcing are forced to become seamless. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of value-added B2C, e-business compliance. Think virtual. We have proven we know that if you aggregate wirelessly then you may also incubate globally. It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you strategize vertically then you may also transform wirelessly. We invariably engineer interactive micro-wireless 24/7/365 content. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Think micro-sticky. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and RDF. Without versioning, you will lack compliance. The metrics for cross-media, social-network-based structuring management are more well-understood if they are not magnetic.