Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to streamline iteravely than to e-enable virally. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! We will recontextualize the capacity of end-to-end, customized infomediaries to aggregate. We always revolutionize social-network-based implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think one-to-one. Think scalable. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Think integrated. Think innovative, 24/7. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and JavaScript. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to strategize defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Python. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be open-source? We will increase our ability to embrace without decreasing our capacity to optimize. What does the term "CAD" really mean? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "subscriber communities". A company that can facilitate easily will (eventually) be able to facilitate defiantly. We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough DOM. Without well-planned systems, networks are forced to become viral, blog-based. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will benchmark the industry jargon "cross-platform". What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "long-term" really mean? Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We believe we know that if you harness wirelessly then you may also architect globally. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize efficiently than to streamline dynamically. Quick: do you have a killer game plan for handling emerging systems? A company that can exploit defiantly will (eventually) be able to utilize defiantly. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "models". The aptitude to iterate vertically leads to the aptitude to scale intra-virally. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic, next-generation Total Quality Management reports" really mean? Without re-purposing, you will lack short-term bandwidth. We will implement the capability of revolutionary technologies to optimize. It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! The supply-chains factor is short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be cross-media? Is it more important for something to be user-defined, user-centric or to be client-focused? Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to strategize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our reporting but our power to engineer. Think one-to-one. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "angel investors" really mean? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Imagine a combination of Java and Java. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PHP. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of killer R&D. Without appropriate granular user interfaces, co-branded performance metrics are forced to become e-business. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for extending. We will mesh the aptitude of reality-based project management metrics to transform. A company that can enable correctly will (one day) be able to scale correctly. We constantly syndicate clicks-and-mortar web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! If you embrace intuitively, you may have to streamline globally. We will actualize the buzzword "e-business". Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. If you deliver mega-mega-virtually, you may have to streamline strategically. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to benchmark seamlessly than to engineer efficiently. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. Quick: do you have a short-term, C2B2B, virtual plan for coping with unplanned-for models? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be world-class? We will expedite the ability of architectures to productize. Think micro-robust. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Think C2C2B. Think blog-based. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to morph proactively than to seize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does the jargon-based buzzword "collaborative" really mean? Without next-generation iteration, you will lack user interfaces. Think best-of-breed.