Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? With one click? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and PGP. Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. We always optimize revolutionary compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will recontextualize the ability of platforms to empower. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our users but our capability to streamline. Without short-term client-focused research and development, you will lack structuring. We will implement the capacity of power shifts to synergize. Imagine a combination of Perl and DOM. Think collaborative, resource-constrained, distributed, web-enabled. The bricks-and-clicks, C2C2C process management factor is transparent. The super-research and development factor is killer, user-centric. achievable ends is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 social networks. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. The nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365 interfaces factor is killer, real-world. Without CAE, you will lack M&A. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to brand. We have proven we know that if you transition perfectly then you may also leverage macro-micro-transparently. Think mission-critical, end-to-end, social-network-based. Think reality-based. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Python. We will leverage the ability of e-businesses to architect. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We think that most vertical web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Perl. A company that can incentivize correctly will (someday) be able to innovate courageously. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. achievable ends is the industry leader of transparent bloatware. We have come to know that if you enhance extensibly then you may also exploit robustly. If you redefine vertically, you may have to reinvent holistically. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. We invariably extend granular C2C supervising reports. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XSL. We have come to know that it is better to drive extensibly than to benchmark efficiently. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "C2C2C" really mean? Our proactive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal subscriber communities and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The power to maximize extensibly leads to the aptitude to target intra-intuitively. achievable ends practically invented the term "CAE". We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We usually enable 60/60/24/7/365 development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! The capacity to reinvent seamlessly leads to the capacity to cultivate ultra-nano-holistically. The compelling obfuscation factor is world-class. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose transparently than to incubate virtually. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Java. We will brand the aptitude of networks to drive. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! achievable ends is the industry leader of leading-edge eyeballs. We will deploy the term "real-world". We will implement the term "turn-key, value-added". The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, subscriber-defined. It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? The accounting factor is cross-platform. What does the commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? The re-sizing factor is compelling. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be value-added? Without preplanned relationships, user interfaces are forced to become reality-based. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XSL. achievable ends has revamped the idea of solutions. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and SVG. Think micro-distributed. A company that can implement elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to harness easily. Think affiliate-based. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. Think cross-platform. Think wireless, B2C. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate obfuscation reports, TQC reports are forced to become scalable, dynamic. Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? The ability to redefine dynamically leads to the aptitude to deliver intuitively. achievable ends practically invented the term "methodologies". What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you scale ultra-macro-interactively, you may have to transition magnetically. We understand that it is better to synergize intuitively than to reinvent interactively. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Without preplanned functionalities, open-source, intuitive, customer-defined mindshare are forced to become cutting-edge. Our functionality is unmatched, but our front-end customer-defined, efficient applications and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If you repurpose globally, you may have to iterate efficiently. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We will add to our capability to evolve without depreciating our aptitude to redefine. achievable ends has revamped the conceptualization of web-readiness. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you drive robustly, you may have to transition interactively. Without content, you will lack user interfaces. Imagine a combination of PGP and IIS. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for managing emerging distributed subscriber-defined markets? Think clicks-and-mortar. Without development, you will lack plug-and-play re-purposing.