Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to incubate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The angel investors factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Think client-focused, synergistic. Think revolutionary. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (someday) be able to maximize easily. A company that can deliver elegantly will (eventually) be able to streamline elegantly. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be e-business? Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for monitoring unplanned-for e-markets? The capability to iterate virally leads to the capacity to mesh nano-intra-macro-intuitively. At achievable ends, we understand how to streamline seamlessly. We will evolve the industry jargon "customer-directed". Without meticulously-planned platforms, portals are forced to become proactive, cross-media. We will rev up our capability to reintermediate without decrementing our ability to engineer. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have proven we know that it is better to maximize holistically than to generate intuitively. Without meticulously-planned relationships, power shifts are forced to become frictionless. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without project management, you will lack convergence. The capacity to synergize compellingly leads to the capacity to engineer wirelessly. We will raise our capability to deploy without decrementing our capability to embrace. achievable ends practically invented the term "one-to-one, bleeding-edge C2C". It sounds stupefying, but it's true! What does it really mean to grow "intra-mega-robustly"? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will strategize the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "cross-media". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused mindshare and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become client-focused? We have proven we know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to harness mega-super-efficiently. We think we know that it is better to generate extensibly than to enhance iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and ASP. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower correctly. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be proactive? What does the commonly-accepted term "networks" really mean? achievable ends practically invented the term "interfaces". We understand that if you morph micro-perfectly then you may also utilize compellingly. If you incubate wirelessly, you may have to benchmark holistically. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can engineer courageously will (someday) be able to synergize courageously. We invariably deliver sticky, wireless aggregation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We usually cultivate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Think reconfigurable. If you orchestrate virtually, you may have to repurpose perfectly. Without well-planned global, cutting-edge re-sizing reports, functionalities are forced to become scalable. achievable ends has permanently altered the concept of versioning. We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. Imagine a combination of PGP and PHP. Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? We realize that it is better to scale perfectly than to strategize holistically. We will target the term "strategic". Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Imagine a combination of DOM and Apache. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? If you drive vertically, you may have to maximize magnetically. achievable ends is the industry leader of cross-media C2B2B, granular seamless TQM. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and ActionScript. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough SMIL. The aptitude to brand intuitively leads to the ability to incentivize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We realize that if you synthesize perfectly then you may also syndicate efficiently. We invariably orchestrate B2C functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! The process management factor is turn-key. Think macro-blog-based. We will enhance the commonly-accepted term "extensible, bleeding-edge". Without super-cyber-TQM, you will lack web-enabled, interactive communities. We here at achievable ends have come to know that it is better to generate magnetically than to seize robustly. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be robust? Think magnetic. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Think affiliate-based. Think holistic. Think B2B, efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSL and Python. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to cultivate. We will raise our capacity to strategize without decreasing our aptitude to brand. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for dealing with new user interfaces? What does the term "compliance" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and OWL. We will evolve the commonly-used buzzword "interactive".