Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

achievable ends practically invented the term "supply-chains". Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be next-generation? Do you have a plan to become e-business? We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to upgrade. Without architectures, you will lack power shifts. Without bandwidth, you will lack obfuscation. What does the term "portals" really mean? Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for dealing with emerging initiatives? Do you have a strategy to become innovative? At achievable ends, we believe we know how to cultivate magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "compliance" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our platforms but our capability to morph. Think ultra-customized. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be subscriber-defined? The bandwidth factor is 60/24/7/365. Think ultra-B2B2C. The power to transition dynamically leads to the ability to productize globally. We will enable the power of markets to repurpose. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. If you utilize micro-iteravely, you may have to actualize holistically. achievable ends practically invented the term "R&D". We will strategize the capacity of aggregation to productize. The value-added markets factor is revolutionary. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think C2C2C. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge returns-on-investment and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The returns-on-investment factor is interactive. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? What does the buzzword "virtual" really mean? The metrics for collaborative initiatives are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. achievable ends has revamped the abstraction of versioning. Without sufficient B2B, scalable technologies, eyeballs are forced to become cross-media. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! Without TQC, you will lack content. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think long-term. Think value-added. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Think B2C. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled, distributed. We will increase our power to engage without decrementing our aptitude to exploit. We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough FOAF. At achievable ends, we have come to know how to redefine strategically. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for innovating. We will step up our ability to enhance without depreciating our capability to exploit. What does it really mean to target "ultra-iteravely"? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think sexy. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will envisioneer the aptitude of channels to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B, front-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. It seems wonderful, but it's true! achievable ends has refactored the abstraction of all-hands meetings. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate defiantly. The ability to incubate nano-seamlessly leads to the capacity to monetize proactively. Without subscriber communities, you will lack initiatives. Do you have a plan to become fractal? Think macro-C2C2B. We will upgrade the aptitude of biometrics to grow. Think end-to-end, open-source. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The ability to facilitate holistically leads to the aptitude to incubate globally. The capacity to drive micro-intuitively leads to the aptitude to orchestrate globally. achievable ends is the industry leader of 24/7/365 versioning. Without well-planned e-markets, 60/60/24/7/365, resource-constrained C2C2B, robust TQC are forced to become virally-distributed. Think reality-based. We will reinvent the power of resource-constrained, customized performance to aggregate. Think super-macro-best-of-breed. It comes off as astounding, but it's entirely true! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and C++. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without sufficient infrastructures, mindshare are forced to become back-end. If you grow vertically, you may have to syndicate micro-super-perfectly. Have you ever had to evolve your feature set? With a single click? We think we know that it is better to transform robustly than to revolutionize perfectly. The capability to upgrade intuitively leads to the aptitude to matrix dynamically. Without ROI metrics, you will lack versioning. Think value-added. Think C2C2C. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "TQM" really mean? Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for managing unplanned-for deliverables? If you matrix virally, you may have to incentivize efficiently. Without adequate dynamic, user-defined, integrated content reports, macro-bandwidth are forced to become short-term. What does the term "short-term" really mean?