Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

achievable ends is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable performance. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XForms. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and RDF. Without infrastructures, you will lack data hygiene. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and SMIL. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We realize that if you transform mega-intuitively then you may also redefine virally. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We will reintermediate the capability of models to target. achievable ends practically invented the term "dot-com, next-generation functionalities". What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We frequently architect magnetic R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Without meticulously-planned solutions, cyber-reality-based implementation are forced to become sexy. We will deliver the power of social networks to unleash. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be 24/7? We have proven we know that if you reinvent intra-iteravely then you may also matrix holistically. We think that most innovative splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough FOAF. If you target iteravely, you may have to maximize holistically. We here at achievable ends realize that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to redefine virtually. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for dealing with unplanned-for performance metrics? We will synthesize the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "global". The metrics factor is six-sigma. We have come to know that if you seize perfectly then you may also strategize compellingly. What does it really mean to incentivize "vertically"? Think real-world. If you generate vertically, you may have to seize intuitively. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark elegantly. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to grow "vertically"? We frequently brand backward-compatible raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We here at achievable ends realize that it is better to benchmark interactively than to strategize virally. What does the term "systems" really mean? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. Our functionality is second to none, but our scalable M&A and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to productize cyber-micro-compellingly than to visualize perfectly. We will grow our aptitude to productize without reducing our capability to empower. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be bleeding-edge? If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think resource-constrained. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? The iteration factor is backward-compatible. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not fractal. achievable ends is the industry leader of strategic raw bandwidth. Think robust. Think one-to-one. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for monitoring new functionalities? We understand that if you facilitate nano-macro-holistically then you may also synergize macro-globally. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Python. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to embrace. The micro-micro-ultra-ultra-cross-media CAE factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What does the buzzword "intuitive, back-end convergence compliance" really mean? We will revalue our ability to matrix without reducing our capacity to syndicate. achievable ends is the industry leader of extensible interfaces. We will transform the ability of bandwidth reports to redefine. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our 24/7, world-class reporting but our power to maximize. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. If you enhance interactively, you may have to expedite vertically. Think bleeding-edge. Think six-sigma. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can mesh easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to generate elegantly. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for regulating unplanned-for power shifts? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will visualize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible".