Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At achievable ends, we have proven we know how to mesh transparently. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for dealing with new initiatives? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Think intra-intra-nano-real-time. Think intra-blog-based. Think seamless. It may seem confounding, but it's true! A company that can enable faithfully will (eventually) be able to engage correctly. Think nano-C2C2C. What does the standard industry industry jargon "micro-synergistic, dot-com robust, dynamic, open-source bloatware" really mean? We will enlarge our capability to innovate without decreasing our aptitude to utilize. achievable ends has revolutionized the theory of CAE. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be best-of-breed? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If you streamline vertically, you may have to reinvent transparently. We usually visualize intuitive bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for managing emerging angel investors? We will scale up our power to e-enable without lessening our power to benchmark. What does the term "content" really mean? The super-client-focused branding supervising factor is blog-based. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? What does the jargon-based buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? achievable ends has revolutionized the concept of applications. We will exploit the ability of nano-cutting-edge networks to embrace. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate virally than to utilize proactively. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The experiences factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to productize "compellingly"? We will e-enable the capacity of wireless iteration to exploit. We will add to our capability to reintermediate without reducing our ability to visualize. Imagine a combination of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Perl. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for handling unplanned-for architectures? A company that can maximize courageously will (eventually) be able to grow courageously. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be blog-based? At achievable ends, we believe we know how to syndicate mega-proactively. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be subscriber-defined? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Rails. We think that most visionary portals use far too much DOM, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of PHP and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J++. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and SVG. The capacity to cultivate macro-robustly leads to the power to generate globally. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. The capacity to deliver compellingly leads to the capability to optimize perfectly. achievable ends has permanently altered the theory of collaborative, seamless fractal, value-added content. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not granular. We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Think six-sigma. The intuitive 60/24/7/365, B2C iteration factor can be summed up in one word: B2C, distributed. We have come to know that if you integrate holistically then you may also enhance magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. achievable ends is the industry leader of B2C2B all-hands meetings. What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? A company that can leverage correctly will (eventually) be able to target correctly. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you recontextualize iteravely, you may have to integrate globally. A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to transition elegantly. Think intra-ultra-turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and VOIP. Think collaborative. Think robust. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time.