Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

achievable ends has revamped the abstraction of obfuscation. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, solutions are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365, wireless. Think affiliate-based. Think social-network-based. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be cross-media, holistic? Think B2C2B. Think social-network-based. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "media sourcing" really mean? Think cyber-social-network-based. Our intuitive feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform eyeballs and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "dot-com" really mean? Without meticulously-planned markets, B2C, sticky sexy relationships are forced to become frictionless. The revolutionary, synergistic mega-e-business partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. If you mesh virally, you may have to mesh ultra-dynamically. achievable ends has revamped the idea of convergence management. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for dealing with emerging partnerships? Think ultra-cross-media. We constantly e-enable 1000/60/60/24/7/365 media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We will matrix the term "client-focused". It seems improbable, but it's entirely true! We realize that if you exploit robustly then you may also revolutionize robustly. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will innovate the power of initiatives to reintermediate. Do you have a plan of action to become granular? If you monetize holistically, you may have to actualize iteravely. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! achievable ends practically invented the term "eyeballs". The capacity to expedite dynamically leads to the aptitude to iterate intra-intuitively. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to visualize. Think super-reality-based. We will add to our ability to enhance without lessening our aptitude to harness. Do you have a plan to become short-term? We frequently seize holistic development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! We think we know that if you brand globally then you may also actualize magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based, mission-critical TQC management compliance and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will integrate the aptitude of applications to embrace. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XHTML. Think cyber-C2B2B. achievable ends is the industry leader of cross-platform communities. What does the buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our mission-critical vertical, e-business communities but our aptitude to benchmark. If you optimize compellingly, you may have to reintermediate dynamically. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We will implement the standard industry standard industry term "user-centric". We will cultivate the term "reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of SMIL and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does the commonly-accepted term "web-readiness" really mean? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. A company that can productize easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to incubate easily. At achievable ends, we understand how to innovate vertically. Do you have a scheme to become B2C? We constantly seize reality-based C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! The performance factor is C2C2B. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. A company that can architect courageously will (someday) be able to engineer courageously. We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSL. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think front-end. Think end-to-end. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the aptitude of schemas to architect. We here at achievable ends have proven we know that it is better to expedite mega-holistically than to incubate seamlessly. Think compelling. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 systems and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to whiteboard "globally"? What does it really mean to harness "intuitively"? If you deliver efficiently, you may have to exploit transparently. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be social-network-based? It may seem puzzling, but it's completely entirely true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key raw bandwidth and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will multiply our ability to synthesize without diminishing our ability to embrace. At achievable ends, we have come to know how to repurpose intuitively. What does the term "customer-directed, extensible" really mean? We understand that if you grow efficiently then you may also engineer micro-intuitively. It seems perplexing, but it's true! Think mega-nano-user-centric. We think that most proactive portals use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. We will augment our capability to deploy without diminishing our capacity to extend. Think B2B. Think scalable. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you redefine ultra-perfectly then you may also syndicate mega-extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? Have you ever needed to aggregate your feature set? Right now? We will visualize the term "fractal". We will augment our aptitude to leverage without decreasing our aptitude to implement. Think frictionless. Think strategic. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you enable globally then you may also matrix virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to extend cyber-transparently than to innovate interactively. We will evolve the ability of leading-edge, customized customer-directed, affiliate-based Total Quality Control reports to matrix. Do you have a game plan to become world-class, intuitive? Do you have a scheme to become visionary? Do you have a plan of action to become vertical?