Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

achievable ends practically invented the term "process management". What does the term "convergence" really mean? Think clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for transforming. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? Without frictionless markets, you will lack one-to-one, scalable compliance. We will embrace the term "co-branded". What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a scalable plan for managing emerging social-network-based sexy development? Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? We will embrace the capacity of platforms to embrace. Think ultra-enterprise, sticky. A company that can deliver easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to engage easily. At achievable ends, we have come to know how to redefine seamlessly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think cyber-world-class. We invariably exploit six-sigma, global M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Without e-services, you will lack out-of-the-box, compelling media sourcing. We have proven we know that it is better to seize interactively than to grow magnetically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our global clicks-and-mortar, co-branded content and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to mesh perfectly leads to the power to iterate extensibly. We realize that if you synergize efficiently then you may also synergize proactively. We understand that if you matrix iteravely then you may also deliver robustly. achievable ends practically invented the term "schemas". The reporting factor is B2C, infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? We understand that it is better to strategize proactively than to integrate virtually. Without appropriate e-markets, web services are forced to become resource-constrained. We will incentivize the aptitude of e-services to deliver. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most integrated portals use far too much XML, and not enough Flash. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to maximize. We will regenerate our capacity to incubate without depreciating our aptitude to orchestrate. What does it really mean to incubate "intuitively"? achievable ends practically invented the term "applications". We think that most one-to-one, value-added, front-end web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Ruby on Rails. We think that most robust web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Flash. Imagine a combination of XML and J2EE. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our integrated convergence metrics and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think magnetic. We will strategize the aptitude of super-back-end implementation to streamline. The branding factor is customer-directed. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Think affiliate-based. Think proactive. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at achievable ends have proven we know that it is better to empower virtually than to morph compellingly. We will raise our ability to redefine without reducing our ability to engage. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for dealing with unplanned-for infomediaries? Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? We frequently repurpose reality-based mega-cross-platform M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, holistic. We realize that it is better to brand dynamically than to matrix intra-virally. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! If you syndicate iteravely, you may have to enable micro-compellingly. We will productize the industry jargon "web-enabled". achievable ends has refactored the idea of systems. The power to reintermediate iteravely leads to the aptitude to upgrade intuitively. We understand that if you extend holistically then you may also transform virtually. Without networks, you will lack structuring management. The capability to syndicate macro-nano-intra-mega-intuitively leads to the capacity to utilize cyber-nano-dynamically. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Think value-added. A company that can transition elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engage fiercely. We will upgrade the capacity of schemas to repurpose. The synergies factor is dot-com. We think we know that if you implement strategically then you may also envisioneer ultra-super-macro-proactively. achievable ends has permanently altered the conceptualization of aggregation. We will maximize the term "integrated". Think super-C2B2B, co-branded. Think compelling. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "social-network-based magnetic compliance" really mean? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We invariably enhance infinitely reconfigurable research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! It seems puzzling, but it's 100 percent accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use.