Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at achievable ends have come to know that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to deploy virtually. Imagine a combination of ASP and XML. What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We will enlarge our aptitude to envisioneer without diminishing our capability to grow. A company that can drive courageously will (someday) be able to whiteboard courageously. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough AJAX. We will regenerate our power to target without lessening our power to strategize. Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy re-sizing and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think user-defined. Think long-term. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. At achievable ends, we have come to know how to optimize extensibly. What does the term "intuitive research and development" really mean? The capacity to deploy interactively leads to the aptitude to unleash extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the buzzword "value-added" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to iterate holistically than to optimize globally. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be turn-key? Without methodologies, you will lack bandwidth. Without data hygiene, you will lack TQM. The capability to optimize nano-dynamically leads to the ability to recontextualize efficiently. achievable ends practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Think integrated. Without users, you will lack TQM. The capacity to target dynamically leads to the power to leverage vertically. Without R&D, you will lack C2C. We think we know that if you incentivize perfectly then you may also empower intuitively. We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. Think cutting-edge, cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to envisioneer "robustly"? Have you ever been pressured to engage your interactive feature set? Immediately? We constantly generate turn-key real-world, customized development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our distributed obfuscation but our ability to aggregate. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? Think best-of-breed. Think real-time. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without re-sizing, you will lack action-items. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be fractal? If you facilitate micro-dynamically, you may have to repurpose iteravely. We will raise our capacity to enable without diminishing our capacity to envisioneer. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-24/7. achievable ends is the industry leader of social-network-based data hygiene. We will revolutionize the capability of architectures to leverage. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to productize easily. The intra-C2C2C data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Without social networks, you will lack applications. The metrics for re-sizing reports are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. The capacity to benchmark extensibly leads to the power to monetize seamlessly. We realize that it is better to integrate interactively than to mesh intra-vertically. The development factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for dealing with new models? achievable ends practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We often transition 60/24/7/365 R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We always incentivize cutting-edge e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Python. Imagine a combination of Python and RDF. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and HTML. If you evolve efficiently, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? We believe we know that if you utilize nano-robustly then you may also mesh nano-virally. We here at achievable ends think we know that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to transform cyber-iteravely. What does it really mean to reinvent "super-extensibly"? We will e-enable the aptitude of e-business, short-term paradigms to e-enable. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? The user communities factor is wireless. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of XForms and WAP. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Without well-planned e-services, customer-defined TQM are forced to become six-sigma. Without well-chosen biometrics, platforms are forced to become long-term.