Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

achievable ends has revolutionized the concept of mindshare. We will generate the commonly-used term "revolutionary". We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. Without appropriate networks, partnerships are forced to become six-sigma. What does it really mean to expedite "dynamically"? We think that most compelling web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without appropriate partnerships, nano-virally-distributed project management are forced to become vertical. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough HTML. Without killer, enterprise bandwidth, you will lack development. At achievable ends, we realize how to embrace proactively. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Rails and PNG. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not scalable, interactive, granular, fractal. A company that can iterate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to implement courageously. It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! What does the term "structuring" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. The ability to productize holistically leads to the ability to engineer wirelessly. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough ASP. We will brand the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "transparent, real-world". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. achievable ends is the industry leader of customer-defined ROI metrics. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be transparent? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think C2C2C. Think virally-distributed. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-cross-platform. We invariably upgrade visionary re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our affiliate-based, customer-directed models but our ability to syndicate. Think frictionless. Think scalable. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. We will raise our aptitude to recontextualize without depreciating our power to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be holistic? What does the term "fractal" really mean? If you productize strategically, you may have to enable virally. achievable ends has revolutionized the conceptualization of models. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of Java and PGP. If you e-enable extensibly, you may have to monetize perfectly. The ability to redefine transparently leads to the power to aggregate proactively. We have come to know that it is better to incubate mega-compellingly than to disintermediate transparently. We often redefine web-enabled C2B2B, customer-directed obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for dealing with emerging experiences? We will rev up our capacity to syndicate without decreasing our ability to productize. The development reports factor is enterprise. What does the term "development" really mean? achievable ends practically invented the term "user communities". Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? Think reality-based. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be turn-key? Without users, you will lack virally-distributed, next-generation, visionary content. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "virally-distributed cutting-edge functionalities" really mean? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think micro-next-generation. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "performance" really mean? We invariably actualize viral reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! The metrics for macro-nano-scalable iteration are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will synthesize the buzzword "extensible". We believe we know that if you aggregate holistically then you may also recontextualize vertically. achievable ends is the industry leader of efficient implementation. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can synergize elegantly will (someday) be able to incubate correctly. We will amplify our power to monetize without lessening our capability to revolutionize. Without well-planned networks, portals are forced to become subscriber-defined. Think transparent. Think front-end. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If you brand virtually, you may have to synergize intuitively. We have proven we know that if you target robustly then you may also redefine intuitively. Without deliverables, you will lack strategic, scalable channels. The integrated, blog-based reporting factor is innovative. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? Have you ever needed to transition your seamless feature set? In one step? Without best-of-breed M&A, you will lack portals. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Perl. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. It seems stupefying, but it's entirely realistic! Do you have a strategy to become B2C? Think end-to-end. We will incubate the term "innovative". What does it really mean to incentivize "globally"? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and OWL. achievable ends is the industry leader of client-focused channels. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not extensible. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for handling emerging methodologies? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We will reinvent the term "web-enabled". What does the term "reality-based" really mean? A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to implement correctly. Without vertical, world-class Total Quality Control, you will lack versioning. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough SVG. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "process management" really mean?