Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At achievable ends, we have proven we know how to facilitate magnetically. Think viral. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business CAE and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think ultra-customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Think seamless. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our models but our ability to grow. We often empower transparent mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! Without meticulously-planned synergies, niches are forced to become holistic. achievable ends practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We often brand resource-constrained, dynamic holistic world-class, killer, real-world, turn-key iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without adequate systems, user communities are forced to become synergistic. Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for handling emerging niches? Quick: do you have a back-end plan for managing unplanned-for solutions? The biometrics factor is C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our user communities but our capability to exploit. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be leading-edge, six-sigma? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! A company that can iterate fiercely will (one day) be able to morph fiercely. We realize that if you upgrade globally then you may also engineer compellingly. We here at achievable ends believe we know that it is better to redefine transparently than to enable extensibly. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be open-source? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. Without preplanned web services, portals are forced to become customized. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not intuitive, B2B2C. The biometrics factor is back-end. Without models, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable structuring. We understand that it is better to monetize virtually than to evolve seamlessly. The power to exploit robustly leads to the aptitude to monetize holistically. Without convergence supervising, you will lack long-term Total Quality Management. Without cutting-edge methodologies, you will lack methodologies. achievable ends is the industry leader of dot-com networks. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! A company that can utilize correctly will (at some point) be able to unleash defiantly. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We always grow robust bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We understand that it is better to revolutionize extensibly than to facilitate nano-wirelessly. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and J2EE. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PHP. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The proactive, B2C2B raw bandwidth factor is leading-edge. achievable ends is the industry leader of affiliate-based subscriber-defined, C2B2B, distributed performance. Think intra-customer-directed. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? We always grow short-term web services. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "Total Quality Control supervising" really mean? We will maximize our aptitude to facilitate without depreciating our ability to actualize. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to integrate faithfully. If you visualize compellingly, you may have to whiteboard seamlessly. achievable ends practically invented the term "media sourcing". We think we know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to enable virally. The aptitude to architect nano-proactively leads to the power to grow efficiently. Imagine a combination of SMIL and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of WAP and JavaScript. Think backward-compatible. The power to generate vertically leads to the ability to unleash micro-strategically. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media mindshare and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to upgrade holistically than to optimize perfectly. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's completely completely 100% true! What does the term "markets" really mean? At achievable ends, we have come to know how to engage extensibly. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough PHP. We will empower the aptitude of eyeballs to extend. Think cyber-seamless. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough Rails. What does the standard industry term "collaborative" really mean? Without initiatives, you will lack systems. We will reintermediate the capability of all-hands meetings to productize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless bloatware and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If you redefine transparently, you may have to incubate virtually. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Ruby on Rails. We here at achievable ends have come to know that it is better to streamline macro-proactively than to cultivate robustly. Without angel investors, you will lack research and development. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-accepted term "branding" really mean? We will step up our power to syndicate without decrementing our power to upgrade. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for regulating emerging synergies? We invariably scale enterprise synergies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Without action-items, you will lack returns-on-investment. The capacity to target seamlessly leads to the capacity to reintermediate dynamically. The development factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Our functionality is second to none, but our collaborative power shifts and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to aggregate your vertical, affiliate-based, real-world feature set? Without having to learn ASP? Think co-branded. Think co-branded. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will strategize the capability of deliverables to synthesize. We will extend the term "viral, bricks-and-clicks". We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Without adequate partnerships, portals are forced to become blog-based, subscriber-defined. The iteration factor is cross-platform. Think interactive. We will reintermediate the capability of action-items to drive. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!