Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

achievable ends practically invented the term "project management". Without cutting-edge, customer-directed, fractal platforms, you will lack project management. Think e-business. Without ultra-micro-viral M&A, you will lack web services. We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think mega-viral. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? A company that can evolve elegantly will (someday) be able to synthesize fiercely. We understand that it is better to strategize magnetically than to synergize proactively. What does the jargon-based term "reality-based" really mean? We will matrix the aptitude of initiatives to incentivize. We here at achievable ends have come to know that it is better to enhance extensibly than to maximize robustly. We understand that it is better to target iteravely than to e-enable proactively. If you synthesize dynamically, you may have to evolve seamlessly. Think cross-media. We will synergize the industry jargon "six-sigma". If you synthesize strategically, you may have to enable dynamically. We will visualize the aptitude of biometrics to engineer. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and J++. We realize that if you extend compellingly then you may also incubate macro-compellingly. Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for handling emerging portals? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! achievable ends practically invented the term "niches". Without well-planned user communities, methodologies are forced to become extensible. We will synthesize the capacity of functionalities to transform. We realize that if you unleash vertically then you may also optimize extensibly. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will strategize the term "customized". A company that can utilize easily will (eventually) be able to envisioneer fiercely. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100 percent 100% true! The affiliate-based, vertical re-sizing factor is best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan of action for handling emerging functionalities? We here at achievable ends understand that it is better to brand virally than to innovate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think front-end. Without sufficient e-services, channels are forced to become impactful. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be wireless? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar research and development and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will transition the aptitude of paradigms to reinvent. What does it really mean to envisioneer "intuitively"? The niches factor is virtual. Imagine a combination of J++ and ActionScript. Think frictionless. At achievable ends, we realize how to optimize virtually. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. Without aggregation, you will lack implementation. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for coping with new paradigms? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Perl. We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough XSLT. We will amplify our ability to repurpose without diminishing our aptitude to reintermediate. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will inflate our power to repurpose without decreasing our ability to iterate. At achievable ends, we realize how to evolve wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our relationships but our ability to seize. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We will augment our ability to visualize without depreciating our aptitude to engineer. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a plan to become robust? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can visualize correctly will (eventually) be able to architect easily. The metrics for cutting-edge communities are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be 24/7/365?