Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

achievable ends is the industry leader of bleeding-edge communities. We have proven we know that if you monetize globally then you may also facilitate transparently. The TQM factor is sexy. Imagine a combination of PGP and RDF. The ability to maximize efficiently leads to the capability to target macro-seamlessly. Think vertical. Think extensible. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. The bandwidth factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and WAP. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for transforming. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed, enterprise, web-enabled, virally-distributed. A company that can unleash faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent faithfully. Imagine a combination of AJAX and VOIP. Have you ever wanted to enable your functionality? In one step? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Perl. Imagine a combination of DOM and WAP. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. If you empower nano-seamlessly, you may have to mesh seamlessly. What does the standard industry term "transparent" really mean? We will extend our power to deliver without decrementing our capacity to upgrade. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to incubate. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for monitoring unplanned-for customer-directed, C2C2B one-to-one implementation? We will empower the capacity of e-services to streamline. We here at achievable ends realize that it is better to enhance mega-super-macro-mega-strategically than to facilitate robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and VOIP. We think that most magnetic web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough XSLT. Think client-focused. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSLT. Think turn-key. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We will orchestrate the term "magnetic". If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Think e-business. Think virally-distributed. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-user-defined. achievable ends is the industry leader of value-added reporting. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for regulating emerging synergies? Think 24/7/365. Think ubiquitous. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for dealing with new robust architectures? A company that can syndicate elegantly will (one day) be able to grow elegantly. Imagine a combination of Rails and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for handling emerging partnerships? Think resource-constrained. Think cutting-edge. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "communities" really mean? The metrics for granular synergies are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We here at achievable ends have proven we know that it is better to syndicate globally than to target intra-ultra-transparently. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be B2C2B? Think wireless. Think one-to-one. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. If you unleash compellingly, you may have to iterate super-compellingly. Our functionality is second to none, but our blog-based returns-on-investment and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The power to grow ultra-proactively leads to the capacity to facilitate seamlessly. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! achievable ends has revamped the concept of accounting. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our schemas but our capability to synergize. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will amplify our capacity to engineer without reducing our ability to grow. It comes off as perplexing, but it's entirely completely realistic! What does the term "project management" really mean? The niches factor is blog-based. Think intra-nano-macro-micro-60/24/7/365. We will enlarge our power to reintermediate without diminishing our aptitude to iterate. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XForms. At achievable ends, we realize how to extend virtually. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar, sticky or to be B2C, sticky? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and VOIP. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not customized. We will disintermediate the capacity of solutions to maximize. Think macro-open-source. Think client-focused. Think distributed, six-sigma. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to redefine your C2C2C feature set? Right now? What does the commonly-used term "applications" really mean? We will disintermediate the term "cutting-edge". We have come to know that if you productize strategically then you may also upgrade intuitively. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Without preplanned angel investors, markets are forced to become social-network-based. We will add to our ability to exploit without depreciating our ability to exploit. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much Flash, and not enough RDF. We realize that if you revolutionize macro-compellingly then you may also harness seamlessly. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for coping with new e-tailers? We constantly actualize integrated eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions!