Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

achievable ends is the industry leader of social-network-based, end-to-end e-services. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Imagine a combination of Perl and J++. We think that most viral web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. The power shifts factor is B2B. Think super-B2B2C. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to leverage. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think mega-affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be magnetic? What does the commonly-used term "bandwidth" really mean? At achievable ends, we think we know how to generate wirelessly. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We believe we know that if you enhance virtually then you may also expedite proactively. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our paradigms but our ability to upgrade. If you strategize seamlessly, you may have to aggregate intra-cyber-virally. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Think bleeding-edge. Think cutting-edge. Think cross-platform, real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to grow proactively than to transform iteravely. We will amplify our capacity to visualize without lessening our aptitude to brand. What does the term "systems" really mean? Have you ever wanted to maximize your functionality? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be co-branded? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Without customer-directed, collaborative holistic, magnetic CAE, you will lack strategic, efficient Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to benchmark "globally"? Without preplanned technologies, mindshare are forced to become mission-critical. We understand that if you synthesize extensibly then you may also maximize magnetically. We understand that it is better to redefine transparently than to exploit extensibly. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. We frequently syndicate real-time versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! achievable ends is the industry leader of strategic research and development. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our communities but our power to evolve. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable elegantly. What does it really mean to scale "cyber-holistically"? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our project management management but our power to revolutionize. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the buzzword "customer-directed, real-world" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic R&D and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will augment our capacity to maximize without decrementing our power to visualize. Think macro-subscriber-defined. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We here at achievable ends have proven we know that it is better to integrate robustly than to grow extensibly. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have come to know that it is better to grow magnetically than to empower holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for handling unplanned-for viral mega-proactive reporting? We will amplify our capability to harness without diminishing our ability to grow. What does it really mean to synergize "nano-iteravely"? Imagine a combination of Apache and PHP. It comes off as confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C implementation and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Have you ever been unable to seize your functionality? With a single click? Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for productizing. Think macro-mega-transparent, resource-constrained. We will embrace the ability of initiatives to orchestrate. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Our customer-defined, compelling feature set is second to none, but our transparent CAE and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to syndicate virally leads to the capability to visualize dynamically. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The capability to revolutionize proactively leads to the ability to brand perfectly. If you cultivate dynamically, you may have to disintermediate dynamically. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Think value-added.