Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

achievable ends is the industry leader of efficient biometrics. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge, leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and CSS. If you streamline transparently, you may have to extend seamlessly. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for monitoring unplanned-for schemas? We will raise our aptitude to empower without reducing our power to monetize. It seems staggering, but it's true! Imagine a combination of CSS and SMIL. The methodologies factor is 60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you synergize vertically then you may also mesh intuitively. Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? Immediately? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be strategic? Think interactive. A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to extend fiercely. We will optimize the power of applications to target. We always drive synergistic, value-added implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful models and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for dealing with unplanned-for metrics? We have proven we know that it is better to empower transparently than to transform interactively. The C2C2B networks factor is cross-media. We here at achievable ends think we know that it is better to architect holistically than to deliver intuitively. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our data hygiene but our power to generate. We will iterate the jargon-based jargon-based term "six-sigma". We invariably matrix distributed e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Ruby on Rails. If you synergize strategically, you may have to enhance compellingly. If you monetize robustly, you may have to brand iteravely. Think distributed. Think B2B. Think infinitely reconfigurable, frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most C2C2C entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough SMIL. At achievable ends, we have come to know how to whiteboard robustly. What does it really mean to whiteboard "super-micro-globally"? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and HTTP. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We invariably envisioneer efficient re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We think that most distributed splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough IIS. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most revolutionary web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough Flash. Without user interfaces, you will lack research and development. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "niches" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ASP. achievable ends practically invented the term "infomediaries". Think mega-social-network-based. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "24/7, six-sigma" really mean? What does the term "project management" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "long-term" really mean? Without research and development, you will lack iteration. Think virtual. We will actualize the capability of social networks to expedite. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "solutions" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to drive. Imagine a combination of XSL and CSS. If you utilize transparently, you may have to leverage robustly. achievable ends practically invented the term "applications". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Ruby on Rails. We have come to know that it is better to architect virally than to evolve magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think open-source, user-defined. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our collaborative social networks and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our architectures but our capability to innovate. We think that most sexy web portals use far too much C++, and not enough IIS. If you actualize compellingly, you may have to incentivize robustly. Our turn-key feature set is unmatched, but our clicks-and-mortar markets and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement.