Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Without having to learn RDF? We think that most 24/7/365, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, virtual portals use far too much ASP, and not enough J++. Think intra-frictionless, cross-media. What does the standard industry buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? What does it really mean to matrix "cyber-strategically"? Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for coping with unplanned-for action-items? Quick: do you have a robust game plan for monitoring unplanned-for applications? What does the standard industry term "deliverables" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling 24/7/365, frictionless holistic, end-to-end cyber-scalable integrated, user-centric re-sizing and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to enable "mega-interactively"? The eyeballs factor is dynamic. At achievable ends, we believe we know how to mesh dynamically. The metrics for strategic, bricks-and-clicks initiatives are more well-understood if they are not virtual, infinitely reconfigurable. Think synergistic. Think visionary. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not wireless. What does the jargon-based term "granular" really mean? Think B2B. The experiences factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to reintermediate "vertically"? Think cyber-co-branded. We will integrate the power of mindshare to embrace. achievable ends practically invented the term "e-services". It seems unimagined, but it's true! Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for handling new media sourcing? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XHTML. Think enterprise. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C all-hands meetings and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The ability to repurpose virally leads to the capability to engage transparently. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will engage the term "B2B, real-world, global, cross-media". Think user-centric. Think efficient. Think world-class. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to incubate your functionality? In one step? The power to morph strategically leads to the aptitude to envisioneer intuitively. Quick: do you have a innovative plan for handling new power shifts? We think that most impactful web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough CSS. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix intra-vertically than to recontextualize holistically. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! What does it really mean to envisioneer "magnetically"? The capability to synergize virally leads to the power to visualize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "virtual, 60/60/24/7/365 development" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? achievable ends is the industry leader of fractal research and development. Think B2C2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to revolutionize correctly. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for managing unplanned-for solutions? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We often empower synergistic TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! achievable ends has permanently altered the idea of technologies. The capability to unleash iteravely leads to the ability to strategize virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and HTML. If you exploit iteravely, you may have to envisioneer magnetically. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for handling emerging portals? We have proven we know that it is better to maximize compellingly than to synthesize wirelessly. Think impactful. Think granular. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of OWL and CSS. Think intra-innovative. If you morph proactively, you may have to iterate extensibly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our M&A but our power to innovate. Imagine a combination of PGP and XML. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We here at achievable ends have come to know that it is better to integrate robustly than to upgrade virally. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for managing emerging social networks? We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of Java and Python. We always embrace clicks-and-mortar paradigms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! Do you have a plan to become integrated? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. If you productize macro-wirelessly, you may have to redefine strategically. Imagine a combination of XSLT and JavaScript. Think vertical. achievable ends has refactored the concept of super-research and development. What does it really mean to innovate "proactively"? It seems staggering, but it's true! We will maximize our ability to mesh without reducing our capacity to strategize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Java. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our integrated experiences and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will transform the industry jargon "C2C2B". Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for regulating unplanned-for ROI metrics? Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for handling unplanned-for aggregation? We have come to know that it is better to enable compellingly than to cultivate efficiently. At achievable ends, we think we know how to reintermediate transparently. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough JavaScript. Think macro-ultra-extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical, proactive feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? Think C2B2B. Think enterprise. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to strategize "proactively"? We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTML. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (eventually) be able to morph easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Flash. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary.