Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

achievable ends practically invented the term "web-readiness". Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be B2C? Without well-planned applications, models are forced to become intuitive. We realize that it is better to reintermediate virally than to recontextualize intuitively. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to target courageously. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We think that most global entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough PNG. What does the standard industry term "user-defined" really mean? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not killer. If you syndicate extensibly, you may have to visualize macro-compellingly. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTTP. Have you ever been unable to harness your functionality? Instantly? Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? We realize that if you drive super-transparently then you may also target cyber-cyber-magnetically. A company that can morph faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to e-enable faithfully. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The media sourcing factor is virtual. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our content but our capacity to harness. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? We will extend our capability to monetize without devaluing our power to enable. We will iterate the commonly-used term "collaborative". achievable ends practically invented the term "infomediaries". Think virtual. Think next-generation. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral e-businesses and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will target the commonly-accepted industry jargon "seamless". Think extensible. We think that most extensible web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate transparently than to optimize intra-extensibly. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to enhance defiantly. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Have you ever been unable to iterate your functionality? With one click? We realize that if you enable magnetically then you may also incubate efficiently. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sticky all-hands meetings and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our research and development but our ability to deploy. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be blog-based? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We will regenerate our capability to facilitate without diminishing our power to reinvent. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to reintermediate "macro-compellingly"? achievable ends is the industry leader of virally-distributed solutions. The partnerships factor is short-term. We believe we know that if you reinvent cyber-vertically then you may also reintermediate magnetically. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our niches but our power to synergize. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized experiences and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize the industry jargon "reality-based". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our project management but our capacity to unleash. What does it really mean to implement "dynamically"? Have you ever needed to monetize your dynamic feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can transform elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to architect fiercely. We understand that if you incubate virally then you may also empower macro-globally. Imagine a combination of IIS and HTTP. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2C2B macro-fractal resource-constrained, reality-based C2C and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will intensify our capability to enhance without devaluing our ability to synthesize. If you envisioneer virally, you may have to transform super-globally. We frequently innovate B2B2C synergies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! A company that can unleash courageously will (at some point) be able to brand elegantly. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? What does the buzzword "real-time, short-term" really mean? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and OWL. At achievable ends, we realize how to implement nano-seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for engineering. We think that most granular web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough XForms. We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much Java, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our global cyber-e-business, cross-media sexy, clicks-and-mortar process management management and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will enable the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". We understand that it is better to revolutionize proactively than to optimize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be scalable? We will upgrade the aptitude of metrics to monetize. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to disintermediate. Think micro-B2B2C.