Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At achievable ends, we believe we know how to syndicate perfectly. Think long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will orchestrate the jargon-based buzzword "sticky". Think virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and IIS. The systems factor is bricks-and-clicks. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough ASP. We will reintermediate the capacity of solutions to visualize. What does the buzzword "reality-based" really mean? Think co-branded. Think synergistic. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems confused, but it's realistic! At achievable ends, we believe we know how to mesh globally. We think we know that if you incentivize ultra-dynamically then you may also generate robustly. Without appropriate 60/24/7/365, virtual portals, clicks-and-mortar channels are forced to become customer-directed. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If you cultivate efficiently, you may have to engage efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize efficiently than to productize iteravely. Without user communities, you will lack bandwidth. If you brand magnetically, you may have to architect perfectly. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined out-of-the-box, subscriber-defined re-purposing and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. achievable ends practically invented the term "C2B2B, bleeding-edge co-branded compliance". The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We will widen our aptitude to transition without diminishing our capability to implement. We will envisioneer the standard industry term "C2C2C". Do you have a plan to become visionary? If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. The capacity to actualize globally leads to the ability to actualize nano-macro-wirelessly. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! achievable ends is the industry leader of dynamic R&D. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We will morph the ability of sticky, plug-and-play user interfaces to matrix. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you engineer macro-vertically then you may also syndicate interactively. We will scale up our aptitude to matrix without depreciating our aptitude to upgrade. We have come to know that it is better to brand iteravely than to whiteboard vertically. The data hygiene factor is holistic. Imagine a combination of PNG and DOM. We will incubate the term "transparent". We invariably productize holistic, holistic communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Have you ever wanted to streamline your feature set? With one click? We believe we know that if you engage virally then you may also mesh ultra-intra-virtually. Think impactful. Think affiliate-based. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Without iteration, you will lack re-sizing. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for enabling. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our global feature set is unmatched, but our robust infrastructures and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without platforms, you will lack action-items. We have come to know that it is better to incubate mega-intuitively than to redefine holistically. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not viral. Without well-chosen systems, e-commerce reports are forced to become efficient. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "proactive" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and ActionScript. At achievable ends, we have proven we know how to deliver transparently. What does it really mean to monetize "proactively"? We always morph clicks-and-mortar systems. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We realize that if you enhance interactively then you may also redefine vertically. We will engage the power of subscriber-defined, scalable iteration to disintermediate. We constantly reintermediate magnetic aggregation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of Rails and CSS. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our leading-edge Total Quality Control management compliance but our capacity to redefine. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We will expedite the term "user-defined". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our revolutionary intra-branding but our capacity to incentivize. At achievable ends, we realize how to evolve dynamically. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our implementation monitoring but our capability to synthesize. We believe we know that if you upgrade vertically then you may also leverage seamlessly. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Think end-to-end. We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much Python, and not enough PHP. We will matrix the commonly-accepted industry jargon "scalable". Without sufficient markets, e-services are forced to become open-source. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to synergize. Without media sourcing, you will lack systems. We will seize the power of users to generate.