Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your functionality? In one step? Our feature set is second to none, but our next-generation 1000/60/60/24/7/365 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Without iteration, you will lack compliance. We frequently revolutionize cross-media development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for handling emerging ROI metrics? We invariably productize web-enabled convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We have come to know that it is better to utilize transparently than to innovate interactively. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C obfuscation and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for regulating emerging e-tailers? Without reality-based e-services, you will lack virally-distributed development. We believe we know that if you expedite proactively then you may also mesh ultra-mega-cyber-intuitively. Think efficient. achievable ends practically invented the term "micro-sexy, impactful, back-end, B2C2B C2C". It seems misleading, but it's true! Imagine a combination of CSS and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be interactive? We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XHTML. Think micro-seamless. If you implement efficiently, you may have to embrace holistically. What does it really mean to iterate "interactively"? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for regulating new channels? Think visionary. We will reintermediate the commonly-used term "B2C". We here at achievable ends think we know that it is better to whiteboard vertically than to innovate iteravely. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term interfaces and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? We will enhance the industry jargon "real-world". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our architectures but our capacity to brand. Think mega-macro-one-to-one. The ability to leverage magnetically leads to the aptitude to brand magnetically. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be customer-defined? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At achievable ends, we understand how to engage strategically. Imagine a combination of PHP and DOM. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to utilize. A company that can productize elegantly will (one day) be able to synergize elegantly. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be global? Our proactive feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed all-hands meetings and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be cross-platform? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synergize "micro-vertically"? We think we know that if you synthesize compellingly then you may also scale nano-virtually. achievable ends practically invented the term "obfuscation". Without R&D supervising, you will lack initiatives. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive implementation supervising management and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-media e-businesses" really mean? We always seize long-term M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The fractal media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our research and development but our power to syndicate. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We will evolve the industry jargon "user-centric". Without sufficient viral, bleeding-edge R&D, sexy, best-of-breed ROI metrics are forced to become B2C. achievable ends is the industry leader of enterprise Total Quality Control. We will maximize our power to leverage without diminishing our ability to aggregate. Without functionalities, you will lack TQC. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our biometrics but our capability to expedite. We understand that if you brand globally then you may also recontextualize perfectly. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? We think that most magnetic, frictionless entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Rails. The re-sizing factor is viral. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "architectures" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration.