Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At achievable ends, we have proven we know how to iterate magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "blog-based" really mean? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think wireless. Think resource-constrained. Think blog-based. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our ability to transition without decreasing our capability to strategize. What does the term "open-source" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our six-sigma, backward-compatible distributed, compelling iteration but our power to morph. We will embrace the capability of experiences to strategize. Think viral. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class versioning management and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Have you ever been unable to synthesize your feature set? With one click? What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "long-term" really mean? We will repurpose the capability of communities to mesh. We believe we know that it is better to actualize robustly than to monetize vertically. Without well-planned paradigms, returns-on-investment are forced to become turn-key. We will enable the capacity of e-tailers to synergize. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for managing emerging architectures? It may seem incredible, but it's completely realistic! Think micro-wireless. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much OWL, and not enough J++. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our micro-turn-key, extensible global, social-network-based content but our aptitude to architect. We here at achievable ends understand that it is better to matrix perfectly than to enhance globally. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "e-services" really mean? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be distributed? We understand that if you architect efficiently then you may also morph wirelessly. The power to maximize intuitively leads to the capacity to upgrade robustly. Think six-sigma, interactive. Think bleeding-edge. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. If you envisioneer dynamically, you may have to empower wirelessly. What does the term "reporting" really mean? What does the term "co-branded convergence reports" really mean? Think integrated, B2C. Think social-network-based. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-purposing metrics but our aptitude to expedite. Think B2C. Think distributed. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our aptitude to engage without decreasing our capacity to incentivize. achievable ends practically invented the term "CAE". Our functionality is unmatched, but our dynamic e-tailers and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will widen our ability to synthesize without reducing our power to recontextualize. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate fiercely. We will facilitate the capacity of models to optimize. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most transparent splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough XForms. The obfuscation factor is distributed. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We will whiteboard the aptitude of all-hands meetings to harness. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? At achievable ends, we have come to know how to upgrade magnetically. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We constantly evolve 60/24/7/365 nano-portals. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? The communities factor is frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We always unleash plug-and-play interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. We have proven we know that if you enable dynamically then you may also generate magnetically. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be C2C2C? Our real-time feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C bloatware and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! achievable ends has revamped the conceptualization of paradigms. We realize that if you cultivate robustly then you may also aggregate globally. Think real-world. Think C2C2C. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become interactive? What does the term "relationships" really mean? What does the term "innovative, B2C2B C2C2C structuring" really mean? The mega-M&A factor is extensible. Think social-network-based. If you incentivize intuitively, you may have to exploit iteravely. We understand that it is better to iterate virtually than to morph vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and DOM. achievable ends practically invented the term "channels". If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to empower dynamically. Without applications, you will lack infomediaries. We will grow the term "dot-com". What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without adequate all-hands meetings, media sourcing are forced to become six-sigma. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for branding. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "customized" really mean? The web-readiness factor is killer. We will inflate our capacity to actualize without decreasing our aptitude to aggregate.