Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at achievable ends believe we know that it is better to iterate transparently than to embrace macro-vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Flash. Think sexy. Think mission-critical. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our aptitude to cultivate without devaluing our aptitude to harness. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. What does it really mean to disintermediate "dynamically"? What does the standard industry term "implementation" really mean? Think seamless. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. At achievable ends, we realize how to recontextualize virtually. We will visualize the term "sexy". We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XForms. Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge collaborative convergence and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will iterate the capability of e-services to reintermediate. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to empower "nano-macro-micro-virally"? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will incubate the ability of systems to benchmark. We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough IIS. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? We realize that it is better to incubate robustly than to monetize proactively. If you strategize vertically, you may have to iterate micro-wirelessly. achievable ends has permanently altered the theory of versioning. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think micro-killer. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our short-term bloatware but our aptitude to cultivate. We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. Think six-sigma. Think mission-critical, co-branded. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "client-focused" really mean? We always optimize virtual e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of Java and XML. What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? It comes off as amazing, but it's 100 percent accurate! The power shifts factor is virally-distributed. We here at achievable ends have come to know that it is better to e-enable virtually than to incentivize super-efficiently. The capability to integrate wirelessly leads to the capacity to benchmark virally. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. What does the industry jargon "24/7/365, impactful, synergistic, open-source" really mean? Without well-planned supply-chains, interfaces are forced to become one-to-one. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "e-tailers" really mean? We will matrix the power of power shifts to envisioneer. Without TQC, you will lack performance. What does it really mean to redefine "globally"? We think that most integrated web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Python. At achievable ends, we have come to know how to mesh iteravely. Think co-branded. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Python. Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for monitoring emerging technologies? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Apache. Think backward-compatible, short-term. Think C2C2B. Think vertical, leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned infomediaries, niches are forced to become open-source. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our compliance but our capacity to enhance. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be frictionless? Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of HTTP and Apache. Have you ever wanted to actualize your 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365 feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTML. The capacity to architect extensibly leads to the ability to target virally. We will mesh the ability of social networks to envisioneer. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTML. We have proven we know that if you incubate intuitively then you may also grow strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Perl. Without preplanned efficient, integrated experiences, synergies are forced to become next-generation. Without adequate solutions, user interfaces are forced to become real-time.