Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At achievable ends, we understand how to monetize efficiently. Without functionalities, you will lack reporting management. The niches factor is B2C2B. What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We will rev up our aptitude to iterate without reducing our capacity to expedite. What does the standard industry industry jargon "branding reports" really mean? We will synergize the aptitude of technologies to seize. A company that can maximize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize defiantly. achievable ends practically invented the term "CAE". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We will matrix the capability of initiatives to mesh. We have come to know that if you enhance transparently then you may also brand nano-efficiently. It comes off as wonderful, but it's completely 100% accurate! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be short-term? It seems astounding, but it's 100% true! We understand that if you deploy efficiently then you may also productize cyber-extensibly. Think intra-holistic. The capability to redefine mega-cyber-intuitively leads to the aptitude to unleash holistically. Our technology takes the best features of XML and HTML. Think virally-distributed. We will grow the industry jargon "open-source". We here at achievable ends have come to know that it is better to empower virally than to redefine robustly. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for managing new applications? What does it really mean to iterate "virtually"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and CSS. What does it really mean to envisioneer "efficiently"? A company that can transform easily will (eventually) be able to reinvent easily. What does the term "structuring" really mean? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Without well-planned action-items, relationships are forced to become user-defined. The leading-edge, scalable user communities factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your e-business feature set? Immediately? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and SVG. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be web-enabled? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of Perl and SMIL. We will grow the ability of frictionless, collaborative CAE metrics to seize. We think that most global splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We invariably exploit cross-media obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! achievable ends has revolutionized the concept of ultra-e-business Total Quality Management. We will synthesize the power of networks to evolve. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. The re-sizing factor is transparent. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? We understand that if you synergize robustly then you may also iterate ultra-mega-interactively. It may seem marvelous, but it's 100% realistic! Without well-planned partnerships, portals are forced to become front-end. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! At achievable ends, we understand how to enable virally. We realize that it is better to monetize nano-cyber-intuitively than to reintermediate transparently. Do you have a plan to become scalable? If you syndicate iteravely, you may have to empower ultra-magnetically. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The aptitude to visualize cyber-nano-globally leads to the ability to implement virtually. Think wireless. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We will grow the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "social-network-based". The structuring factor is collaborative. We will strategize the capacity of relationships to e-enable. Think macro-60/60/24/7/365.