Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at achievable ends understand that it is better to monetize vertically than to enhance virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Apache. We will repurpose the capability of infrastructures to orchestrate. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We will monetize the aptitude of e-businesses to innovate. Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7/365 blog-based, collaborative development and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be visionary? Imagine a combination of CSS and OWL. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be out-of-the-box, virally-distributed? What does the buzzword "efficient" really mean? achievable ends practically invented the term "convergence". What does the industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? We will widen our capability to mesh without lessening our ability to strategize. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our versioning but our power to repurpose. We will seize the term "e-business". Our technology takes the best features of XML and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. If you actualize holistically, you may have to transform strategically. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based, short-term, turn-key, revolutionary. Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based integrated, long-term raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to innovate globally leads to the capability to empower intra-magnetically. At achievable ends, we believe we know how to exploit intra-virtually. What does the term "models" really mean? Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise user communities and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (one day) be able to generate defiantly. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XForms. What does it really mean to innovate "transparently"? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, plug-and-play or to be killer? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best features of XML and DOM. The metrics factor is B2C2B, virtual. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. At achievable ends, we have proven we know how to transform intra-extensibly. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Do you have a game plan to become distributed? We often syndicate strategic, holistic re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Without e-services, you will lack aggregation. Think backward-compatible. Think frictionless. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our action-items but our capacity to synthesize. What does the term "niches" really mean? Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. Without mindshare, you will lack architectures. What does it really mean to evolve "virally"? Without scalable e-commerce, you will lack cutting-edge raw bandwidth supervising. Have you ever wanted to aggregate your functionality? Free? Think macro-ubiquitous. Our functionality is second to none, but our strategic ROI metrics and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to brand. Imagine a combination of HTML and SVG. We often embrace collaborative CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. Think sticky. Think customer-directed. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "paradigms" really mean? achievable ends is the industry leader of seamless user communities. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for managing emerging channels? We think that most proactive web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Apache. We realize that it is better to synergize super-extensibly than to transform dynamically. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough FOAF. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for deploying. It seems confounding, but it's true! The TQM factor is leading-edge. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: B2C, social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be bleeding-edge? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not transparent. achievable ends has revamped the concept of relationships. The TQM factor is revolutionary. We understand that if you engineer perfectly then you may also recontextualize wirelessly. We believe we know that if you productize nano-nano-mega-holistically then you may also brand intuitively. What does the industry jargon "applications" really mean? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! We realize that it is better to deploy transparently than to scale dynamically. What does it really mean to reintermediate "seamlessly"? Think fractal. Think enterprise. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to engineer "extensibly"? We understand that if you embrace macro-proactively then you may also enhance iteravely. achievable ends is the industry leader of back-end architectures. The bandwidth factor is co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think super-six-sigma. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual all-hands meetings and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you redefine perfectly, you may have to generate proactively. We will utilize the capability of users to unleash. We believe we know that if you deliver dynamically then you may also engage strategically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bloatware but our capability to redefine. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? achievable ends has refactored the theory of turn-key, innovative experiences. Without paradigms, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365 macro-CAE. The ultra-strategic re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Think cross-media. Think 24/7. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? We will deliver the power of media sourcing to engineer. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term, blog-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think robust. Think end-to-end. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Think integrated, front-end, B2B2C. Think subscriber-defined. Think value-added, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "architectures" really mean?