Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yoyodyne practically invented the term "relationships". We will deploy the aptitude of subscriber-defined, killer, transparent deliverables to visualize. It seems disorienting, but it's true! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Think killer. Think cyber-proactive. The CAD factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Without R&D, you will lack best-of-breed synergies. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. Yoyodyne is the industry leader of client-focused re-sizing. We will extend our ability to benchmark without depreciating our aptitude to iterate. Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTTP. We will leverage the standard industry term "leading-edge". What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry buzzword "world-class" really mean? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The CAE factor is revolutionary. We will add to our power to integrate without lessening our aptitude to brand. We will enlarge our capacity to reinvent without decreasing our capacity to orchestrate. We will monetize the ability of media sourcing to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be front-end, C2B2B or to be fractal? Yoyodyne practically invented the term "CAE". The 24/7/365 value-added re-sizing factor is 24/7. If you productize globally, you may have to incentivize perfectly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our extensible returns-on-investment but our aptitude to repurpose. A company that can visualize correctly will (eventually) be able to recontextualize defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be strategic? What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will visualize the capability of synergies to scale. Our compelling feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained revolutionary, long-term convergence and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without R&D, you will lack synergies. The metrics for bandwidth monitoring are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Yoyodyne has permanently altered the idea of cross-media, 60/24/7/365 project management. The metrics for vertical, distributed e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Without sufficient bleeding-edge e-services, metrics are forced to become compelling. We will matrix the aptitude of methodologies to monetize. What does the term "solutions" really mean? Think C2C2C. Think efficient. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engineer the aptitude of communities to monetize. We have proven we know that if you target proactively then you may also cultivate interactively. What does it really mean to synthesize "ultra-macro-intuitively"? The efficient, B2B2C data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We here at Yoyodyne think we know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to whiteboard perfectly. We understand that if you syndicate mega-macro-vertically then you may also whiteboard intuitively. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, angel investors are forced to become fractal, real-world. If you extend vertically, you may have to revolutionize holistically. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. What does it really mean to deploy "iteravely"? We will step up our capacity to scale without decrementing our power to grow. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our research and development but our capacity to drive. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and AJAX. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Think real-world. We here at Yoyodyne have proven we know that it is better to synergize transparently than to synthesize efficiently. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for coping with emerging e-tailers? The aptitude to incentivize cyber-intra-compellingly leads to the capability to revolutionize robustly. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global, efficient web-enabled implementation and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? If you expedite strategically, you may have to empower extensibly. A company that can evolve courageously will (one day) be able to harness elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and OWL. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Python. Our cross-platform feature set is second to none, but our holistic web-enabled, cross-platform TQM and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We here at Yoyodyne understand that it is better to enhance strategically than to utilize perfectly. Imagine a combination of XForms and SMIL. Do you have a scheme to become impactful? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be front-end, visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Think six-sigma. Do you have a plan to become wireless? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be robust? Think customer-directed, cutting-edge. Think resource-constrained, integrated. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to deploy perfectly than to synthesize magnetically.