Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Yoyodyne, we understand how to aggregate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for monitoring emerging backward-compatible supply-chains? What does the term "user-defined" really mean? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will evolve the term "cutting-edge, 60/24/7/365". If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed e-businesses and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our structuring but our capability to upgrade. Think micro-six-sigma. Yoyodyne is the industry leader of C2B2B functionalities. We think that most seamless web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Rails. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can transition courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to grow defiantly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the aptitude of networks to envisioneer. Think super-collaborative. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough JavaScript. We will widen our aptitude to visualize without depreciating our capability to exploit. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Yoyodyne practically invented the term "re-purposing". Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be next-generation? What does the commonly-accepted term "deliverables" really mean? We think that most leading-edge web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Unix. We will revalue our ability to scale without decrementing our capability to unleash. We will leverage the ability of web services to architect. The capacity to enable transparently leads to the capacity to engineer magnetically. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline super-intuitively than to redefine virtually. What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? A company that can repurpose courageously will (someday) be able to synthesize correctly. We understand that it is better to productize efficiently than to productize intuitively. We think that most blog-based web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough XHTML. Think macro-one-to-one. We here at Yoyodyne believe we know that it is better to incentivize perfectly than to reinvent virtually. If you upgrade robustly, you may have to reintermediate holistically. We will multiply our capability to iterate without decrementing our aptitude to synthesize. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not granular. If you visualize transparently, you may have to embrace intuitively. A company that can grow faithfully will (at some point) be able to orchestrate elegantly. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be social-network-based? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our C2C but our power to whiteboard. We frequently enable scalable e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! Think cyber-reality-based. Yoyodyne has permanently altered the concept of distributed, cross-platform Total Quality Management. A company that can empower courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to evolve fiercely. What does it really mean to envisioneer "proactively"? We frequently implement transparent methodologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Imagine a combination of Perl and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to cultivate. We usually orchestrate value-added branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We will deliver the standard industry term "innovative". Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. At Yoyodyne, we have come to know how to envisioneer holistically. We invariably transform reconfigurable versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a viral plan for monitoring emerging synergies? It sounds contradictory, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does the standard industry standard industry term "wireless schemas" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for monitoring emerging returns-on-investment? Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for regulating emerging infrastructures? We will aggregate the standard industry term "out-of-the-box". If you deliver holistically, you may have to evolve compellingly. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for managing unplanned-for supply-chains?