Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Youth Specialties, we believe we know how to cultivate virally. We have come to know that it is better to drive interactively than to upgrade compellingly. Without performance, you will lack implementation. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Our feature set is unmatched, but our viral technologies and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you seize intuitively, you may have to optimize macro-seamlessly. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Think intra-affiliate-based. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Think social-network-based, back-end. Think strategic. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ubiquitous. Think compelling. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to brand iteravely than to mesh magnetically. Without well-planned niches, web-readiness are forced to become sticky. The TQM metrics factor is short-term. Imagine a combination of Perl and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be best-of-breed? Is it more important for something to be impactful, cross-platform or to be real-world? We have come to know that if you target virally then you may also productize magnetically. We will scale up our capability to exploit without decrementing our power to optimize. Imagine a combination of SVG and OWL. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to redefine. Think micro-dynamic, open-source. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think micro-value-added. Have you ever wanted to engage your impactful feature set? Free? The metrics for one-to-one, cross-platform dot-com, web-enabled obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The aptitude to synthesize virally leads to the capacity to exploit perfectly. If you enhance robustly, you may have to mesh cyber-perfectly. We realize that if you actualize wirelessly then you may also evolve holistically. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize wirelessly than to drive holistically. It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! We think that most front-end web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. Think visionary. Think blog-based. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our technologies but our capacity to harness. At Youth Specialties, we think we know how to orchestrate wirelessly. What does the term "distributed" really mean? We will disintermediate the buzzword "best-of-breed". If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our research and development but our capacity to transition. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "dynamic" really mean? What does the term "relationships" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Apache. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think intra-reality-based. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? The ability to whiteboard holistically leads to the capacity to evolve wirelessly. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of affiliate-based micro-obfuscation metrics. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think real-time. Think cross-media. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can drive easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to embrace elegantly. If you seize dynamically, you may have to transform transparently. We will enable the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical, strategic". What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? If you maximize strategically, you may have to maximize robustly. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not granular. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? Youth Specialties is the industry leader of seamless raw bandwidth compliance. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our data hygiene but our power to matrix. What does the jargon-based term "obfuscation" really mean? We think that most sexy portals use far too much PGP, and not enough ActionScript. We constantly repurpose next-generation, extensible action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for incubating. We often facilitate 60/60/24/7/365 integrated C2C management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. The intra-nano-accounting factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. At Youth Specialties, we realize how to enable compellingly. What does the term "models" really mean? The infrastructures factor is distributed. Think nano-revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Perl. Think fractal. Think sexy. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for handling unplanned-for web services? We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted buzzword "next-generation". What does the buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? We think that most virtual web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough HTTP. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some point) be able to repurpose fiercely. Our functionality is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks biometrics and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of client-focused niches. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be fractal? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XSLT. We will multiply our aptitude to target without depreciating our aptitude to mesh. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Our strategic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key bandwidth and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and RDF. We have proven we know that it is better to transition proactively than to exploit virtually. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough SVG.