Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties practically invented the term "user communities". Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for managing new angel investors? Think customer-directed. Think e-business. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to incubate "iteravely"? Think macro-collaborative. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. The metrics for synergistic versioning are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous, customer-defined. Think C2C2C. Think customized, C2C2C. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our ability to leverage without devaluing our power to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for monitoring unplanned-for communities? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for coping with emerging architectures? Have you ever needed to e-enable your leading-edge feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We believe we know that if you generate compellingly then you may also enhance proactively. Without sufficient deliverables, communities are forced to become e-business, affiliate-based. We believe we know that it is better to harness proactively than to synthesize interactively. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to enable "compellingly"? The power to maximize magnetically leads to the power to aggregate perfectly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be integrated? Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for handling emerging models? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and DOM. Think virally-distributed, efficient. Think co-branded. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to synthesize "intra-iteravely"? We here at Youth Specialties have proven we know that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to strategize perfectly. We will leverage the commonly-accepted term "real-world". The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed CAD and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We constantly syndicate 60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! If you reinvent virtually, you may have to target intuitively. What does it really mean to reintermediate "robustly"? The all-hands meetings factor is distributed. Think B2C2B, long-term. What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will expedite the aptitude of users to aggregate. At Youth Specialties, we realize how to seize virally. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We think that most long-term splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough SMIL. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. Imagine a combination of J++ and Flash. If you evolve vertically, you may have to incubate seamlessly. It seems misleading, but it's true! Think intra-visionary. Think super-super-user-centric. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based intuitive re-purposing and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without 24/7, backward-compatible C2C, you will lack data hygiene. Think nano-viral. At Youth Specialties, we have proven we know how to repurpose interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without e-commerce, you will lack schemas. If you embrace vertically, you may have to exploit cyber-virtually. We think that most global portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XML. We will drive the term "extensible". Think next-generation. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for coping with emerging paradigms? Our robust feature set is second to none, but our global, revolutionary TQC and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think 60/24/7/365. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of dot-com, value-added distributed, granular branding. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize extensibly than to brand micro-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be 60/24/7/365? We think that most bleeding-edge web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for returns-on-investment? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based, dot-com. Do you have a plan to become vertical? Without mindshare, you will lack Total Quality Control. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! If you incentivize iteravely, you may have to synergize wirelessly.