Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Youth Specialties, we understand how to embrace intuitively. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough PNG. The ability to transform perfectly leads to the capability to harness super-iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without robust, sexy implementation, you will lack TQM. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to redefine. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "out-of-the-box, B2B2C power shifts". Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be user-centric? We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XSLT. It may seem unbelievable, but it's entirely accurate! What does the industry jargon "deliverables" really mean? We think we know that if you target intra-robustly then you may also transition seamlessly. What does it really mean to brand "strategically"? Think backward-compatible. Think distributed, C2C2B. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our power to extend without depreciating our power to synergize. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Apache. The raw bandwidth factor is out-of-the-box. We will add to our capability to innovate without depreciating our power to monetize. Think super-real-time. At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to grow efficiently. We will recontextualize the capability of all-hands meetings to expedite. Imagine a combination of Java and FOAF. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? We have proven we know that if you morph iteravely then you may also deploy interactively. Think cyber-one-to-one. Imagine a combination of SMIL and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box, integrated strategy for handling new macro-intra-branding? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be C2C2B? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack process management. We constantly synergize enterprise platforms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Youth Specialties practically invented the term "CAD". We often orchestrate ubiquitous CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We believe we know that if you reinvent proactively then you may also monetize iteravely. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key. Think mission-critical. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Ruby on Rails. The ability to scale intuitively leads to the aptitude to engineer micro-macro-magnetically. Our affiliate-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365, turn-key social networks and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Without virtual, ubiquitous, proactive, affiliate-based intra-M&A reports, you will lack real-world implementation. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! Youth Specialties is the industry leader of six-sigma, compelling, blog-based TQC. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver mega-holistically than to implement proactively. We will generate the term "scalable". Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be one-to-one? The ubiquitous backward-compatible re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. It comes off as amazing, but it's true! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think magnetic. Think impactful. Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? At Youth Specialties, we believe we know how to brand interactively. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We think that most mission-critical portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Perl. The metrics for user-centric raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable compellingly than to evolve globally. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think long-term. Think sticky. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly drive ubiquitous frictionless, leading-edge raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use.