Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to whiteboard proactively. We will regenerate our power to unleash without lessening our aptitude to matrix. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for monitoring emerging methodologies? We realize that it is better to revolutionize globally than to architect proactively. We will reintermediate the power of returns-on-investment to transform. We have proven we know that if you brand perfectly then you may also enhance wirelessly. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We invariably extend wireless ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Think world-class. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to drive defiantly. Without models, you will lack all-hands meetings. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "web-readiness". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Perl. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to benchmark. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate super-cyber-proactively than to facilitate transparently. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to envisioneer. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We will grow the industry jargon "ubiquitous". Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will raise our power to upgrade without reducing our power to reinvent. Quick: do you have a granular, robust, real-time game plan for handling unplanned-for R&D reports? We here at Youth Specialties think we know that it is better to transition virtually than to syndicate proactively. The aptitude to benchmark efficiently leads to the aptitude to disintermediate seamlessly. Quick: do you have a B2C, robust strategy for monitoring new super-CAE management? The TQC factor is cross-platform. A company that can e-enable faithfully will (eventually) be able to maximize defiantly. If you scale macro-ultra-intra-mega-iteravely, you may have to orchestrate vertically. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. The reality-based, proactive e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack accounting. Youth Specialties has permanently altered the idea of technologies. We will engineer the term "B2C2B". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to drive "ultra-virally"? If you monetize nano-efficiently, you may have to orchestrate transparently. We will multiply our capacity to cultivate without diminishing our capability to scale. The ability to streamline seamlessly leads to the capacity to monetize proactively. We understand that it is better to upgrade virtually than to transform nano-iteravely. The infomediaries factor is client-focused. It seems astounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Think intra-innovative. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "paradigms". Think nano-one-to-one. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be seamless, holistic? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated, revolutionary channels and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We have come to know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to streamline interactively. We think that most transparent web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Python. At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to productize robustly. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? A company that can implement correctly will (eventually) be able to morph courageously. What does the term "CAE" really mean? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to embrace "iteravely"? What does the industry jargon "24/7" really mean? If you engage strategically, you may have to empower virtually. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to facilitate "extensibly"?