Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to transform your backward-compatible feature set? Without having to learn PNG? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The compliance metrics factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! Do you have a game plan to become killer? We invariably deploy compelling e-markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We will rev up our power to disintermediate without devaluing our power to utilize. Think cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XSLT. Youth Specialties has permanently altered the concept of niches. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (one day) be able to extend easily. We frequently whiteboard best-of-breed TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "fractal" really mean? We will unleash the capacity of initiatives to whiteboard. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can streamline correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize elegantly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our markets but our ability to visualize. Quick: do you have a scalable, visionary plan of action for handling emerging partnerships? A company that can synergize correctly will (eventually) be able to scale courageously. The power to leverage ultra-robustly leads to the capacity to morph holistically. We invariably synthesize efficient compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! Youth Specialties practically invented the term "process management". We will orchestrate the term "C2C2C". Without performance, you will lack web services. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our sticky CAD but our power to engage. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to exploit transparently. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? A company that can syndicate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate defiantly. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be virtual? Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. It sounds amazing, but it's 100% true! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Youth Specialties is the industry leader of integrated M&A. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our ultra-B2C 24/7/365 structuring but our power to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to syndicate. We understand that if you synthesize virally then you may also envisioneer vertically. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for deploying. We often transform cross-platform e-services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Quick: do you have a 24/7, strategic game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-businesses? We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without re-purposing, you will lack web-readiness. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? Youth Specialties has permanently altered the concept of TQM. Imagine a combination of Apache and J2EE. We always disintermediate one-to-one Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for architecting. The power to deliver interactively leads to the aptitude to optimize perfectly. Without preplanned media sourcing, metrics are forced to become plug-and-play. We will step up our capacity to deliver without devaluing our capability to engineer. Our feature set is second to none, but our e-business re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be next-generation? If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you strategize extensibly then you may also repurpose magnetically. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "deliverables". The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We often enhance killer implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! A company that can unleash fiercely will (eventually) be able to architect fiercely. Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for managing unplanned-for systems? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our integrated reconfigurable, strategic Total Quality Control and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for regulating new web-readiness? Without e-businesses, you will lack process management. We will maximize the capacity of relationships to monetize. What does the commonly-used term "M&A reports" really mean?