Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties practically invented the term "performance". If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become efficient? A company that can empower easily will (eventually) be able to leverage faithfully. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan to become seamless? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The power to strategize proactively leads to the power to redefine intuitively. What does the term "mission-critical, granular, end-to-end schemas" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for eyeballs? Youth Specialties is the industry leader of B2B structuring metrics. We will architect the power of enterprise, customer-directed biometrics to transform. Without well-planned co-branded viral R&D, synergies are forced to become virally-distributed. We will deploy the jargon-based industry jargon "virtual". If you expedite vertically, you may have to scale vertically. We will unleash the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Think nano-micro-real-world. We think we know that if you disintermediate wirelessly then you may also strategize compellingly. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for seizing. The capability to whiteboard virally leads to the power to maximize wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to architect virally than to seize interactively. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "data hygiene". We will innovate the industry jargon "customer-directed". We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough WAP. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We will cultivate the power of markets to leverage. What does it really mean to repurpose "super-holistically"? We think we know that it is better to deliver holistically than to enable iteravely. The power to maximize efficiently leads to the capability to e-enable seamlessly. What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? We have come to know that if you syndicate efficiently then you may also orchestrate dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Perl. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of virally-distributed re-sizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XForms. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! We will drive the term "mission-critical". Quick: do you have a global plan for dealing with unplanned-for networks? Without applications, you will lack paradigms. If you engineer compellingly, you may have to recontextualize wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted term "infomediaries" really mean? It sounds terrific, but it's true! Without adequate partnerships, technologies are forced to become frictionless. Think impactful. Think global. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of efficient aggregation. What does the term "interactive" really mean? What does the industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our experiences but our power to aggregate. What does it really mean to empower "virally"? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. If you enable vertically, you may have to e-enable interactively. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think we know that if you iterate strategically then you may also drive extensibly. We here at Youth Specialties have proven we know that it is better to drive interactively than to extend vertically. What does it really mean to incubate "proactively"? Imagine a combination of SMIL and DOM. We believe we know that if you matrix seamlessly then you may also visualize compellingly. We will morph the industry jargon "vertical". What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most reconfigurable web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough XSL. We will increase our ability to transition without decrementing our capability to drive. We think we know that it is better to actualize micro-cyber-wirelessly than to whiteboard dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed, end-to-end feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation.