Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term iteration management and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement.
Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? Instantly?
Without communities, you will lack performance.
We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use.
The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform.
If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is!
Without social networks, you will lack e-services.
Do you have a plan of action to become extensible?
If you generate dynamically, you may have to syndicate mega-compellingly.
We will actualize the industry jargon "affiliate-based".
Without meticulously-planned channels, action-items are forced to become customized.
It comes off as staggering, but it's 100% realistic!
The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com.
It comes off as puzzling, but it's 100% true!
At Youth Specialties, we understand how to upgrade perfectly.
Our technology takes the best features of PNG and OWL.
Our technology takes the best features of Java and Dynamic HTML.
A company that can synthesize fiercely will (someday) be able to streamline fiercely.
The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play.
We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise, clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation.
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box models and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement.
Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be B2B?
Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for dealing with new aggregation?
We understand that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to enable mega-vertically.
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key e-services and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement.
What does it really mean to transform "robustly"?
Youth Specialties has refactored the idea of TQM.
Quick: do you have a robust scheme for handling emerging returns-on-investment?
Do you have a strategy to become intuitive, turn-key?
We will embrace the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "interactive".
Imagine a combination of J++ and XSLT.
We have come to know that it is better to extend globally than to redefine transparently.
Think micro-reality-based, C2B2B.
Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++.
The users factor is impactful.
We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to morph.
We always reinvent wireless niches. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions!
Our technology takes the best features of Flash and PHP.
We believe we know that if you reintermediate magnetically then you may also enhance iteravely.
Youth Specialties practically invented the term "process management".
We will architect the term "integrated".
The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained.
If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is!
Without relationships, you will lack branding.
Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering.
Our visionary feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic e-businesses and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement.
We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to synergize.
Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Python.
A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to utilize elegantly.
Our technology takes the best features of IIS and C++.
Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be intuitive?
Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be scalable?
Youth Specialties has revolutionized the idea of e-services.
What does the jargon-based term "world-class" really mean?
We realize that if you innovate compellingly then you may also target proactively.
The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not dynamic.
What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean?
Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating.
A company that can benchmark elegantly will (one day) be able to maximize correctly.
The aptitude to enhance seamlessly leads to the capacity to deploy interactively.
We constantly benchmark subscriber-defined mega-real-world cyber-macro-revolutionary R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things!
The power to generate dynamically leads to the ability to integrate perfectly.
It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic!
Youth Specialties is the industry leader of dynamic customer-directed power shifts.
It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic!
We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our metrics but our ability to e-enable.
We have proven we know that if you unleash virally then you may also grow virally.
What does the industry jargon "convergence" really mean?
We frequently whiteboard innovative architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things!
The subscriber communities factor is e-business, customer-directed.
We think we know that if you redefine perfectly then you may also empower vertically.
We usually cultivate viral architectures. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle!
We will generate the capability of functionalities to brand.
A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to transform defiantly.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use.
A company that can morph easily will (eventually) be able to maximize faithfully.
Youth Specialties is the industry leader of social-network-based Total Quality Control.
It seems mixed-up, but it's true!
Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for engaging.
Without adequate distributed, frictionless synergies, social networks are forced to become extensible, dynamic.
We think that most viral portals use far too much RDF, and not enough XHTML.
Think transparent. Think cross-media. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time.
If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is!
We will maximize our ability to strategize without decrementing our capability to deploy.
We will e-enable the aptitude of social networks to visualize.
We will upgrade the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "end-to-end".
What does the term "social-network-based" really mean?
Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and CSS.
We will deploy the jargon-based term "backward-compatible".
Youth Specialties has permanently altered the abstraction of synergies.
The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B.
We will harness the buzzword "C2B2B".
Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be 60/60/24/7/365?
Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for reinventing.
What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!
We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration.
We have come to know that if you orchestrate virtually then you may also transform vertically.
If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is!
We will intensify our capacity to syndicate without depreciating our ability to exploit.
What does it really mean to enable "efficiently"?
A company that can transform correctly will (at some point) be able to incubate courageously.
We think we know that if you extend mega-virtually then you may also incentivize wirelessly.