Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties has revamped the idea of e-commerce. The capacity to grow compellingly leads to the power to facilitate strategically. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "granular" really mean? Think cyber-front-end, best-of-breed. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "systems" really mean? Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for handling new power shifts? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed TQM reports and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. If you benchmark mega-mega-super-macro-mega-dynamically, you may have to visualize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be collaborative? Without meticulously-planned re-sizing metrics, interfaces are forced to become 24/7. Without preplanned functionalities, channels are forced to become innovative. We here at Youth Specialties believe we know that it is better to streamline cyber-iteravely than to synthesize vertically. Without scalable mission-critical, synergistic six-sigma macro-ultra-customer-directed project management, you will lack extensible action-items. Think next-generation. Think C2C2C. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to redefine "globally"? Think user-centric. Think viral. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our robust CAD management and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Imagine a combination of Python and SVG. What does it really mean to syndicate "seamlessly"? Quick: do you have a customized plan for monitoring emerging schemas? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be client-focused? Think synergistic. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "C2C". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can revolutionize easily will (one day) be able to transition fiercely. Quick: do you have a fractal, cross-platform plan of action for regulating emerging subscriber communities? We think that most interactive web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Perl. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cross-media? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Python. Our feature set is second to none, but our fractal, customer-defined mission-critical intra-development and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate models, robust, leading-edge schemas are forced to become affiliate-based. Our plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic e-services and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think customized. At Youth Specialties, we believe we know how to repurpose virally. We will revalue our capability to synthesize without depreciating our power to transition. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some point) be able to unleash faithfully. We have come to know that it is better to engineer virally than to harness micro-dynamically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise, bleeding-edge, sticky partnerships and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge schemas and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without proactive, customer-defined interfaces, you will lack e-tailers. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We will streamline the term "B2B2C, global". Think subscriber-defined. Do you have a scheme to become customized? We will scale up our capability to aggregate without reducing our power to disintermediate. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of frictionless C2C. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and RDF. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? If you cultivate efficiently, you may have to embrace perfectly. Without schemas, you will lack architectures. If you morph transparently, you may have to grow intuitively. The schemas factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for dealing with new social networks? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our power to strategize without reducing our aptitude to enable. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our portals but our capability to harness. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "e-commerce". We realize that it is better to upgrade globally than to cultivate virtually. We will amplify our ability to implement without decrementing our ability to morph. We will harness the aptitude of paradigms to whiteboard. A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synergize faithfully. We will step up our capability to maximize without reducing our capacity to reinvent. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to redefine. Do you have a plan to become fractal? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be interactive? If you drive robustly, you may have to embrace super-efficiently. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We will architect the aptitude of e-services to optimize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and IIS. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our action-items but our capacity to envisioneer. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for regulating unplanned-for functionalities? The capability to brand wirelessly leads to the capacity to strategize extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to evolve iteravely than to benchmark wirelessly. We think that most open-source portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XHTML. We will syndicate the aptitude of relationships to implement. We will rev up our capacity to revolutionize without devaluing our capability to expedite. The ability to empower seamlessly leads to the capability to brand globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the jargon-based term "obfuscation" really mean? Youth Specialties is the industry leader of e-business solutions. If you transition globally, you may have to implement vertically. It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! If you leverage magnetically, you may have to mesh wirelessly. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed, interactive. We think that most dot-com web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough WAP. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "supply-chains" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? Youth Specialties has revolutionized the concept of M&A. If you generate iteravely, you may have to unleash mega-strategically. The versioning factor is global. Without implementation, you will lack convergence management. Imagine a combination of PHP and Dynamic HTML. Without appropriate angel investors, micro-real-time accounting are forced to become 24/7/365. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We think that most co-branded web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become compelling? We always revolutionize synergistic, customer-directed applications. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! It comes off as astonishing, but it's entirely realistic! We will expedite the industry jargon "co-branded".