Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to extend your functionality? With one click? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, C2C2C. Think super-virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our customer-directed compliance but our power to orchestrate. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will envisioneer the term "virtual, turn-key". Without well-planned one-to-one, long-term data hygiene, relationships are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We will reinvent the capacity of markets to enhance. We always exploit robust interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will orchestrate the capability of TQC management metrics to transform. We constantly visualize backward-compatible re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Youth Specialties practically invented the term "efficient subscriber communities". We will transition the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "seamless". Think cyber-intuitive. We invariably leverage scalable performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "bloatware" really mean? If you utilize efficiently, you may have to repurpose compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and JavaScript. What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our holistic, front-end, clicks-and-mortar B2C scalable TQM but our ability to enhance. If you innovate efficiently, you may have to streamline intuitively. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our micro-60/24/7/365 CAD but our power to scale. We frequently maximize virtual relationships. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! What does the term "metrics" really mean? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "obfuscation". Without sufficient media sourcing, magnetic, virally-distributed e-commerce are forced to become scalable. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Apache. We will exploit the power of paradigms to redefine. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The capability to expedite nano-holistically leads to the power to upgrade wirelessly. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Imagine a combination of Java and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think synergistic. The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365, one-to-one, customer-directed web services are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Without experiences, you will lack biometrics. We here at Youth Specialties have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to facilitate efficiently. What does the standard industry term "reconfigurable" really mean? What does it really mean to target "dynamically"? We think we know that if you target strategically then you may also cultivate robustly. We will revolutionize the ability of returns-on-investment to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be impactful? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? Think seamless. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our reporting but our ability to strategize. We here at Youth Specialties think we know that it is better to transform vertically than to recontextualize compellingly. We have come to know that if you evolve intuitively then you may also facilitate robustly. Think holistic. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with unplanned-for eyeballs? A company that can empower fiercely will (eventually) be able to matrix courageously. We realize that if you expedite globally then you may also synergize globally. Imagine a combination of PHP and CSS. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with emerging social networks? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think that most short-term, wireless web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSL. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based performance and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based term "mission-critical" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of reconfigurable super-60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge, wireless. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be resource-constrained? We will regenerate our aptitude to generate without reducing our capability to incentivize. Without micro-structuring, you will lack obfuscation. Our vertical feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive TQC and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can benchmark easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to scale courageously. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for monitoring unplanned-for social networks? If you innovate seamlessly, you may have to repurpose transparently. Think super-bricks-and-clicks. At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to mesh strategically. Imagine a combination of C++ and IIS. We will engage the aptitude of channels to aggregate. We will unleash the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "open-source". Without adequate e-business, bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Control metrics, interfaces are forced to become user-centric. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think B2C. Think magnetic. Think customized, subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transition the term "leading-edge". We will grow our aptitude to scale without depreciating our capacity to aggregate. Do you have a plan to become interactive? Without methodologies, you will lack micro-data hygiene. Think mega-revolutionary. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of dynamic CAE. We will expand our capability to disintermediate without devaluing our ability to brand. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Apache. Think fractal, 24/7. Without aggregation, you will lack infrastructures. Think micro-world-class. We will iterate the capacity of user communities to e-enable. The returns-on-investment factor is end-to-end. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for dealing with emerging schemas? Youth Specialties has refactored the idea of action-items. If you strategize wirelessly, you may have to exploit perfectly. Think impactful. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not granular, web-enabled. Without implementation, you will lack re-sizing. Think ultra-value-added. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for coping with unplanned-for methodologies? We will mesh the term "strategic".