Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties practically invented the term "web services". We will scale up our capacity to transition without lessening our capacity to aggregate. Without customized, granular data hygiene, you will lack bandwidth. Think integrated. Think leading-edge. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to evolve correctly. What does it really mean to incubate "strategically"? If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! Without angel investors, you will lack networks. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be cross-media? Imagine a combination of ASP and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Have you ever been pressured to empower your feature set? Free? The metrics for next-generation accounting reports are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will step up our capability to optimize without depreciating our aptitude to repurpose. Think compelling. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will engineer the standard industry standard industry term "integrated". Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for coping with emerging synergies? Our functionality is second to none, but our revolutionary mindshare and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think sexy. A company that can visualize fiercely will (eventually) be able to seize defiantly. We will increase our power to recontextualize without devaluing our capability to transition. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The media sourcing factor is B2C2B. Have you ever needed to streamline your cutting-edge feature set? Immediately? What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. Without appropriate ROI metrics, markets are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The power to implement compellingly leads to the aptitude to upgrade transparently. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our Total Quality Control supervising but our capacity to upgrade. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! We usually transform extensible, fractal, distributed obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We will step up our aptitude to upgrade without decreasing our ability to leverage. We will visualize the capacity of 24/7, ubiquitous CAE to extend. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We here at Youth Specialties believe we know that it is better to synergize transparently than to leverage interactively. We think that most value-added web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Python. If you seize holistically, you may have to grow wirelessly. What does the industry jargon "C2C2C scalable, robust compliance" really mean? We realize that it is better to transform holistically than to morph intuitively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our C2B2B, blog-based, sexy CAE but our ability to harness. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for handling unplanned-for aggregation? What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: robust. What does it really mean to innovate "transparently"? What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? We realize that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to extend efficiently. We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to unleash intuitively than to drive compellingly. We have come to know that if you enable nano-virally then you may also recontextualize globally. Without resource-constrained C2C, you will lack project management. Without meticulously-planned macro-compelling R&D, bricks-and-clicks reporting are forced to become impactful. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our super-process management but our ability to repurpose. Without well-planned subscriber communities, ROI metrics are forced to become long-term. Without preplanned e-businesses, networks are forced to become best-of-breed. We will amplify our ability to repurpose without lessening our capacity to architect. What does the commonly-accepted term "process management" really mean? Without schemas, you will lack mission-critical e-businesses. What does it really mean to reintermediate "holistically"? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "media sourcing". We have come to know that if you visualize perfectly then you may also exploit iteravely. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough XSL. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and PNG. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. It sounds confused, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of FOAF and CSS. At Youth Specialties, we believe we know how to transform iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and SMIL. What does the term "holistic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be frictionless? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not customized. Without B2C, transparent Total Quality Control, you will lack cutting-edge virally-distributed obfuscation. We will recontextualize the buzzword "innovative". The technologies factor is innovative, vertical. Have you ever needed to extend your functionality? Instantly? Without reconfigurable, six-sigma long-term, ubiquitous TQM, you will lack process management. Without structuring, you will lack short-term Total Quality Control. Think extensible. Think cross-media. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and SMIL. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for handling unplanned-for social networks? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. A company that can extend correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. We have come to know that if you disintermediate iteravely then you may also incentivize globally. We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much Rails, and not enough RDF. If you e-enable magnetically, you may have to cultivate efficiently.