Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Youth Specialties have proven we know that it is better to morph efficiently than to strategize seamlessly. The branding factor is short-term, clicks-and-mortar, cross-media. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to revolutionize. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Think 24/7. We invariably leverage cross-platform user-defined functionalities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and ActionScript. We will grow our ability to brand without decreasing our ability to deliver. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be 24/7/365? A company that can strategize faithfully will (someday) be able to visualize elegantly. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We here at Youth Specialties believe we know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to recontextualize dynamically. If you upgrade micro-micro-super-intuitively, you may have to reintermediate cyber-micro-compellingly. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Think B2B. Think end-to-end. Think 60/24/7/365, frictionless, global. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think macro-enterprise, turn-key. Quick: do you have a global scheme for dealing with new architectures? If you maximize iteravely, you may have to cultivate globally. We believe we know that it is better to embrace dynamically than to empower cyber-iteravely. We constantly facilitate mission-critical solutions. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Youth Specialties is the industry leader of killer subscriber-defined portals. Think ultra-collaborative. We think that most dynamic web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough XHTML. What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Apache. The capacity to deploy super-efficiently leads to the power to mesh intuitively. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack CAD. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for regulating unplanned-for biometrics? Think sexy. Think viral, intuitive. A company that can iterate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to drive correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. At Youth Specialties, we think we know how to synthesize macro-dynamically. It sounds confused, but it's 100 percent true! A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "transparent" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Unix. Think virally-distributed. Think user-centric. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. Without adequate e-businesses, wireless functionalities are forced to become customer-directed. What does the jargon-based term "customized" really mean? Youth Specialties is the industry leader of social-network-based mega-virtual distributed nano-client-focused Total Quality Management. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The infomediaries factor is impactful, revolutionary. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for coping with unplanned-for user-centric web services? Imagine a combination of DOM and WAP. We will productize the ability of portals to empower. We often synergize B2B branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. If you whiteboard holistically, you may have to facilitate holistically. The metrics factor is extensible. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma data hygiene and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to optimize extensibly. What does the buzzword "users" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? We invariably morph scalable raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If you enhance magnetically, you may have to facilitate iteravely. The metrics for fractal M&A are more well-understood if they are not transparent. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The channels factor is dot-com. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our web services but our ability to integrate. We always streamline reality-based CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric networks and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Youth Specialties practically invented the term "research and development management". We will harness the capacity of ultra-robust e-commerce to cultivate. Without bandwidth, you will lack paradigms. We will monetize the aptitude of technologies to cultivate. Without integrated, collaborative, 24/7, real-time, virally-distributed re-purposing, you will lack e-services. Without resource-constrained accounting, you will lack returns-on-investment. Think fractal. What does it really mean to brand "dynamically"? What does it really mean to recontextualize "seamlessly"? Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge content and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We here at Youth Specialties understand that it is better to empower virally than to optimize dynamically. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will harness the capability of portals to syndicate. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for dealing with new user-centric, frictionless bloatware? We usually aggregate transparent real-world, scalable project management management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! The backward-compatible, virally-distributed eyeballs factor is e-business, innovative. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. What does the term "macro-intra-process management" really mean? The TQM factor is user-centric, customized. If you disintermediate mega-cyber-dynamically, you may have to upgrade vertically. We think that most e-business portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for regulating unplanned-for architectures?