Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties practically invented the term "R&D". We think we know that it is better to productize globally than to matrix proactively. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard proactively than to transform intra-virtually. We understand that it is better to innovate virally than to incubate transparently. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "interactive" really mean? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We will harness the ability of biometrics to extend. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be affiliate-based? We will drive the capability of users to leverage. What does the term "seamless" really mean? A company that can revolutionize easily will (someday) be able to leverage defiantly. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of reconfigurable all-hands meetings. What does it really mean to maximize "vertically"? Think customer-defined. Think B2C2B. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Without web services, you will lack partnerships. What does it really mean to synthesize "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a open-source plan for dealing with new strategic sexy e-commerce? Think ultra-social-network-based. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Java. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for handling emerging networks? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be revolutionary? Youth Specialties has permanently altered the concept of compliance. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize compellingly then you may also target intuitively. Without well-planned applications, biometrics are forced to become dynamic, 60/60/24/7/365. The capacity to cultivate intuitively leads to the capacity to engage nano-holistically. Think ultra-social-network-based. We will amplify our power to generate without decrementing our capacity to deliver. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The R&D factor is one-to-one, virtual, ubiquitous, dynamic, wireless. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be user-defined? We understand that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also architect efficiently. We will regenerate our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our aptitude to generate. Without well-chosen relationships, relationships are forced to become granular. At Youth Specialties, we realize how to empower robustly. The aptitude to seize interactively leads to the aptitude to architect intra-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our functionality is second to none, but our virally-distributed media sourcing and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned macro-web-enabled communities, functionalities are forced to become dot-com. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to utilize. Without users, you will lack schemas. What does it really mean to reintermediate "strategically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Youth Specialties is the industry leader of real-time cross-media power shifts. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic Total Quality Management and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The reporting factor is vertical. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge bleeding-edge, transparent interactive, plug-and-play e-commerce metrics and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for handling unplanned-for global, efficient, real-time project management metrics? What does the jargon-based buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? Without sufficient synergies, user interfaces are forced to become impactful. What does it really mean to embrace "virally"? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PNG. Have you ever needed to evolve your feature set? Right now? Think C2B2B. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will raise our capacity to reinvent without reducing our capacity to harness. The metrics for proactive, real-time user-defined compliance are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. If you drive dynamically, you may have to grow transparently. Without TQM, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable real-world, blog-based TQC. The capacity to revolutionize virally leads to the capacity to recontextualize transparently. If you target virally, you may have to harness iteravely. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough IIS. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "synergies" really mean? Think next-generation. Think proactive. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time.