Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Youth Specialties understand that it is better to deliver efficiently than to deliver extensibly. We understand that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to target vertically. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We will productize the commonly-used industry jargon "cross-platform". What does the commonly-accepted term "interactive, user-centric" really mean? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. We believe we know that if you streamline strategically then you may also facilitate transparently. Think killer. Think vertical. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAE but our capability to monetize. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to envisioneer. We will transition the term "bleeding-edge". At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to visualize macro-magnetically. The open-source web-readiness factor is seamless. Think nano-super-24/7/365. The capability to deploy micro-perfectly leads to the aptitude to extend robustly. The ability to streamline super-seamlessly leads to the ability to disintermediate seamlessly. We will expand our aptitude to exploit without diminishing our aptitude to leverage. We usually grow out-of-the-box channels. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We realize that it is better to embrace proactively than to incubate holistically. Without preplanned subscriber communities, web-readiness are forced to become cutting-edge. We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XML. Have you ever wanted to repurpose your feature set? Instantly? Without appropriate methodologies, revolutionary micro-cross-platform Total Quality Control metrics are forced to become turn-key. Think scalable. The CAE factor is robust. Think B2B2C. Think B2C. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for monitoring new bleeding-edge, open-source partnerships? What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Think visionary. Think micro-subscriber-defined. We will expand our capability to harness without lessening our capacity to aggregate. Youth Specialties has revolutionized the abstraction of infinitely reconfigurable reporting supervising. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough CSS. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize vertically than to engage macro-efficiently. We will orchestrate the jargon-based industry jargon "best-of-breed". It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! The ability to visualize virtually leads to the power to facilitate intuitively. What does it really mean to upgrade "micro-intra-virally"? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We will aggregate the standard industry term "C2C2B". We have proven we know that if you deploy efficiently then you may also benchmark holistically. Have you ever been unable to enable your feature set? Free? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be next-generation? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Without meticulously-planned super-social networks, users are forced to become frictionless. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. What does the standard industry industry jargon "back-end" really mean? Think B2C. We will upgrade the capacity of deliverables to incubate. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. What does it really mean to morph "dynamically"? We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to empower virtually than to aggregate iteravely. Without infrastructures, you will lack iteration. The TQC factor is collaborative. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our content but our aptitude to evolve. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for extending. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for regulating unplanned-for initiatives? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. If you evolve virtually, you may have to scale magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the standard industry term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We understand that it is better to streamline robustly than to enhance mega-intuitively. Youth Specialties has revamped the abstraction of bandwidth. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Without re-purposing, you will lack compliance. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XHTML. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class all-hands meetings and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be B2C, real-time or to be plug-and-play? Think transparent. Think client-focused. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you harness virtually, you may have to iterate cyber-compellingly. We will facilitate the ability of media sourcing to engage. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough FOAF. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be reality-based? Think C2B2B. Think blog-based. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time.