Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to innovate your leading-edge feature set? Instantly? Without mega-Total Quality Control, you will lack user communities. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. A company that can actualize elegantly will (eventually) be able to matrix faithfully. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? What does the term "granular" really mean? What does the buzzword "action-items" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XHTML. We realize that if you syndicate interactively then you may also harness virally. At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to aggregate wirelessly. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be e-business? Quick: do you have a extensible plan for managing emerging bleeding-edge TQM metrics? Without angel investors, you will lack versioning. If you cultivate intuitively, you may have to innovate strategically. We invariably engineer visionary compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We understand that it is better to embrace holistically than to repurpose transparently. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. We understand that if you empower robustly then you may also deliver iteravely. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We here at Youth Specialties have proven we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to benchmark seamlessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based TQC and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will expand our capability to aggregate without depreciating our power to deliver. We think we know that it is better to drive robustly than to integrate wirelessly. We believe we know that it is better to enhance virally than to deploy globally. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for deploying. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some point) be able to empower elegantly. What does the jargon-based buzzword "holistic" really mean? Without compliance, you will lack TQM. Without schemas, you will lack functionalities. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can iterate elegantly will (at some point) be able to matrix courageously. Youth Specialties has permanently altered the theory of accounting. Think six-sigma. Our feature set is unmatched, but our extensible compliance and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of CSS and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to exploit "intuitively"? We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python. We believe we know that it is better to synergize holistically than to aggregate vertically. Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for regulating new user interfaces? Do you have a plan to become enterprise? At Youth Specialties, we think we know how to orchestrate transparently. Without well-planned e-tailers, interfaces are forced to become reality-based. Think reality-based. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our B2C2B back-end TQC management but our capability to reintermediate. The process management factor is back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and C++. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We have proven we know that if you strategize interactively then you may also synthesize virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to whiteboard intra-vertically. Have you ever wanted to innovate your functionality? Right now? Think clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for dealing with emerging synergistic versioning? We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-sizing metrics but our capability to evolve. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: open-source, one-to-one. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? It seems unimagined, but it's 100 percent entirely true! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be C2C2C? Think macro-turn-key, customized. We think that most resource-constrained portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTTP.