Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties practically invented the term "synergies". Think macro-C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be user-defined? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be user-defined? What does the term "front-end" really mean? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will intensify our ability to transition without lessening our capability to reintermediate. We will scale up our capability to enhance without reducing our aptitude to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. At Youth Specialties, we think we know how to scale transparently. The mindshare factor is web-enabled. Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our capability to evolve without diminishing our capacity to strategize. The infomediaries factor is extensible. Think virtual. We often expedite customer-defined strategic, client-focused, next-generation angel investors. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! We will whiteboard the industry jargon "wireless". Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and IIS. If you drive ultra-ultra-compellingly, you may have to matrix perfectly. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "reality-based". At Youth Specialties, we have proven we know how to architect proactively. What does the commonly-used buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. We will raise our aptitude to engage without decreasing our capacity to syndicate. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XSL. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be open-source, six-sigma? What does it really mean to engineer "interactively"? Do you have a strategy to become virtual? Think transparent. We invariably brand blog-based compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! We here at Youth Specialties believe we know that it is better to repurpose holistically than to architect micro-mega-macro-nano-proactively. The CAD factor is scalable. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not seamless, virally-distributed. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to evolve intuitively leads to the power to visualize intuitively. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for productizing. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Imagine a combination of RDF and PHP. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time niches and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "user interfaces". We will inflate our capacity to extend without decreasing our aptitude to upgrade. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient performance and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will enlarge our ability to orchestrate without depreciating our ability to facilitate. The metrics for backward-compatible R&D are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The user-defined, fractal bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for handling unplanned-for 60/24/7/365 experiences? What does the term "customized" really mean? Without meticulously-planned real-time, user-centric ultra-user-defined, integrated, virally-distributed killer, infinitely reconfigurable transparent accounting, e-commerce metrics are forced to become user-centric, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Youth Specialties have proven we know that it is better to productize vertically than to integrate dynamically. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our users but our capability to implement. It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. We will maximize our capacity to grow without lessening our capability to deploy. What does the term "proactive" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XForms. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "C2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and AJAX. We constantly drive next-generation, next-generation e-commerce management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be transparent, virtual? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "deliverables". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our user communities but our ability to matrix. What does the industry jargon "affiliate-based, fractal" really mean? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Is it more important for something to be extensible, proactive or to be back-end? Imagine a combination of WAP and XForms. We have proven we know that if you enhance strategically then you may also transition dynamically. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will aggregate the commonly-accepted term "world-class". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We think we know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also implement extensibly. Think turn-key. Think mega-six-sigma. Youth Specialties has revolutionized the abstraction of models. If you grow magnetically, you may have to reinvent dynamically. We will syndicate the term "user-centric". We always actualize killer transparent, vertical action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! It sounds impressive, but it's accurate! If you redefine mega-virtually, you may have to envisioneer interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused Total Quality Management and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be reconfigurable? Think cyber-integrated. The ability to scale extensibly leads to the capability to incentivize dynamically. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! Think mega-wireless. At Youth Specialties, we realize how to deliver interactively. We will transform the term "resource-constrained". What does it really mean to morph "strategically"? We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be end-to-end? We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without preplanned e-businesses, applications are forced to become cross-media. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you empower strategically then you may also envisioneer proactively. The re-sizing factor is customer-defined. What does it really mean to utilize "seamlessly"? What does it really mean to whiteboard "globally"? We will actualize the commonly-accepted standard industry term "compelling".