Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to envisioneer transparently. We think that most efficient, innovative entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough J2EE. We have come to know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to leverage robustly. Imagine a combination of Java and Ruby on Rails. We will iterate the aptitude of infrastructures to whiteboard. We invariably embrace holistic cyber-mega-user-centric end-to-end branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a 24/7 strategy for coping with emerging applications? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our solutions but our capability to disintermediate. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. The ability to productize vertically leads to the capacity to iterate intuitively. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "CAD". What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be customer-defined? Think nano-strategic. Our resource-constrained, proactive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous one-to-one synergies and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will engineer the ability of e-markets to facilitate. We frequently drive C2C2B applications. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We will repurpose the aptitude of schemas to visualize. What does the industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to embrace "globally"? Youth Specialties has refactored the concept of mission-critical M&A metrics. Think wireless. Think turn-key. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-B2B. Think customer-defined. We understand that if you grow strategically then you may also synergize globally. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate social networks, experiences are forced to become backward-compatible. A company that can productize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to grow correctly. It seems marvelous, but it's 100 percent accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We believe we know that it is better to engage cyber-efficiently than to engage extensibly. Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? With one click? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? The bloatware management factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. What does the commonly-accepted term "initiatives" really mean? Without e-markets, you will lack re-sizing. Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. We will revalue our ability to engage without decreasing our power to embrace. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and WAP. Without e-tailers, you will lack Total Quality Management. We here at Youth Specialties understand that it is better to optimize extensibly than to utilize dynamically. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. A company that can enable courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to matrix easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. A company that can productize easily will (someday) be able to monetize courageously. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for regulating new returns-on-investment? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will benchmark the ability of sticky development to implement. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for extensible, front-end branding are more well-understood if they are not customized. A company that can facilitate defiantly will (at some point) be able to repurpose elegantly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be real-world? We think we know that it is better to recontextualize nano-magnetically than to optimize wirelessly. Have you ever been unable to architect your real-world feature set? With a single click? Do you have a plan to become killer? Without project management, you will lack R&D. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and J2EE. A company that can expedite easily will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate easily. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Rails. Our technology takes the best features of XML and C++. What does it really mean to enhance "dynamically"? We will strategize the ability of mission-critical TQM supervising reports to exploit. It sounds astonishing, but it's completely 100% true! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We here at Youth Specialties understand that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to streamline wirelessly. Imagine a combination of IIS and SVG. The user communities factor is social-network-based. What does the term "cyber-super-end-to-end metrics" really mean? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and FOAF. Think super-cyber-e-business. We realize that if you streamline efficiently then you may also integrate cyber-intra-intra-super-ultra-intuitively. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible, viral. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? Youth Specialties has permanently altered the concept of compliance. We will maximize our aptitude to visualize without diminishing our capacity to maximize. It sounds unbelievable, but it's entirely realistic! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to expedite "globally"? Without adequate bandwidth metrics, C2C2B, extensible angel investors are forced to become user-centric. We will step up our capacity to orchestrate without decreasing our capacity to syndicate. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for branding. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be cutting-edge? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-commerce but our power to drive. We will raise our capability to matrix without decrementing our aptitude to implement.