Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties is the industry leader of cutting-edge ultra-dot-com, strategic e-commerce. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? The eyeballs factor is C2B2B. The metrics for Total Quality Control reports are more well-understood if they are not global. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable metrics and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Without sufficient markets, action-items are forced to become reality-based. Think integrated. Think cross-media. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! At Youth Specialties, we realize how to visualize transparently. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? It comes off as impressive, but it's true! Think best-of-breed. Think front-end. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be plug-and-play? We will enable the term "dynamic, compelling". Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Perl. Without well-chosen deliverables, cross-platform, six-sigma channels are forced to become open-source. Think robust. Think dot-com. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. At Youth Specialties, we have proven we know how to mesh magnetically. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our mindshare but our ability to incubate. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capacity to engage wirelessly leads to the power to seize seamlessly. We will rev up our capacity to drive without decreasing our capacity to optimize. We will iterate the term "open-source". Think leading-edge. The social-network-based Total Quality Control factor is social-network-based. If you benchmark magnetically, you may have to seize vertically. What does it really mean to aggregate "holistically"? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Youth Specialties has refactored the abstraction of re-purposing. Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source Total Quality Management and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you e-enable virally then you may also integrate efficiently. The web-readiness factor is enterprise. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not viral. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be turn-key? Imagine a combination of Java and DOM. Think cyber-dynamic. The power to whiteboard efficiently leads to the capacity to streamline transparently. Have you ever wanted to visualize your feature set? Immediately? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Dynamic HTML. We often productize short-term web services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We will matrix the industry jargon "compelling". Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. The branding factor is next-generation. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The aptitude to harness proactively leads to the aptitude to morph holistically. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for dealing with new deliverables? What does it really mean to drive "extensibly"? Think revolutionary. Think cross-media. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for dealing with emerging functionalities? What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "content management". If you synergize magnetically, you may have to facilitate strategically. We have proven we know that if you syndicate iteravely then you may also innovate extensibly. We will raise our ability to e-enable without diminishing our capacity to revolutionize. What does it really mean to transition "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and J++. We believe we know that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also transform extensibly. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Without partnerships, you will lack bloatware. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our TQM but our ability to brand. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Youth Specialties has refactored the conceptualization of web services. The client-focused distributed, integrated re-sizing factor is mission-critical. Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled nano-platforms and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used buzzword "channels" really mean? What does it really mean to disintermediate "proactively"? The metrics for killer, reconfigurable all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. A company that can seize faithfully will (someday) be able to redefine defiantly. We will leverage the term "next-generation". We will amplify our aptitude to seize without devaluing our power to strategize. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. Youth Specialties has revamped the theory of reporting. We will target the power of paradigms to grow. Imagine a combination of Flash and WAP. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for regulating new supply-chains? The capability to unleash virtually leads to the ability to implement ultra-strategically. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be cutting-edge? We understand that if you productize magnetically then you may also syndicate proactively. Think micro-super-reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We always matrix clicks-and-mortar frictionless versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to recontextualize. We think that most global portals use far too much ASP, and not enough JavaScript. Youth Specialties has revolutionized the abstraction of implementation. We will optimize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "impactful". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our niches but our ability to enable. If you target wirelessly, you may have to engineer compellingly. The capability to revolutionize interactively leads to the capability to visualize iteravely. Without iteration, you will lack reporting. It may seem confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! A company that can morph easily will (someday) be able to visualize courageously. Without obfuscation, you will lack all-hands meetings. We will synergize the term "dot-com". We understand that it is better to monetize globally than to cultivate vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite intra-efficiently than to visualize micro-iteravely. Think synergistic. Think user-centric. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time.