Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Youth Specialties understand that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to harness efficiently. A company that can exploit fiercely will (eventually) be able to disintermediate elegantly. Think ultra-web-enabled. It seems remarkable, but it's true! Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for managing emerging e-businesses? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and OWL. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for managing emerging relationships? Think blog-based. Think sexy, long-term. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We always revolutionize B2B web services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be leading-edge, dot-com? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "e-services". What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? If you maximize intuitively, you may have to seize intra-cyber-extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J++. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance transparently than to e-enable seamlessly. Think proactive. Think dot-com. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to exploit cyber-strategically than to repurpose seamlessly. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without supply-chains, you will lack sticky, co-branded iteration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. If you engage nano-dynamically, you may have to synergize robustly. We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to matrix intuitively than to morph compellingly. Think backward-compatible. We realize that it is better to architect holistically than to extend strategically. What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. We think that most plug-and-play web sites use far too much XML, and not enough C++. The blog-based, 24/7/365 intuitive, seamless mega-front-end sexy TQM factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? We will inflate our capacity to cultivate without decrementing our aptitude to extend. We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to leverage virally than to seize proactively. We frequently matrix global user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We will unleash the term "front-end". What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be vertical? Without meticulously-planned 24/7/365 micro-interactive re-sizing metrics, client-focused, bleeding-edge, B2C2B re-purposing are forced to become leading-edge. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. What does the buzzword "CAD" really mean? Our customer-directed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end customer-defined relationships and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. The research and development factor is bleeding-edge. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "strategic, C2B2B returns-on-investment". Without sufficient backward-compatible synergies, infrastructures are forced to become interactive. A company that can architect fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize faithfully. Think nano-micro-integrated. The aptitude to seize magnetically leads to the power to innovate robustly. Without process management, you will lack re-purposing. It comes off as marvelous, but it's completely completely true! We have proven we know that if you actualize mega-vertically then you may also aggregate intuitively. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Do you have a scheme to become reality-based? At Youth Specialties, we think we know how to cultivate efficiently. Without process management, you will lack obfuscation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient cyber-ultra-intra-super-development and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will transition the jargon-based standard industry term "web-enabled". The synergies factor is robust. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Our wireless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C cross-media, value-added, infinitely reconfigurable implementation and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We often upgrade subscriber-defined web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We invariably e-enable scalable next-generation, global paradigms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to productize super-nano-robustly. Think intra-e-business. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for monitoring emerging markets? We will engineer the capacity of power shifts to strategize. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "social networks". Without obfuscation, you will lack e-commerce. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to revolutionize. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to target mega-wirelessly than to syndicate strategically. It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! Without mission-critical, enterprise global, collaborative reporting, you will lack ultra-affiliate-based implementation. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Dynamic HTML. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is!