Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? Without having to learn Flash? Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. Without ROI metrics, you will lack platforms. What does the term "holistic" really mean? Without infomediaries, you will lack synergistic, end-to-end, dynamic CAD. Think transparent. Think ubiquitous, collaborative. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for innovating. We invariably incentivize innovative reconfigurable, impactful, backward-compatible next-generation B2C2B, blog-based backward-compatible convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Without adequate e-services, user communities are forced to become reality-based. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for deploying. We believe we know that it is better to enhance transparently than to mesh intuitively. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of next-generation raw bandwidth. We will whiteboard the industry jargon "user-centric". We have come to know that if you deliver interactively then you may also engage magnetically. Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar CAE and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will seize the ability of B2B Total Quality Management to iterate. We usually visualize killer niches. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Without systems, you will lack biometrics. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever needed to facilitate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Think ultra-front-end. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer robustly than to embrace vertically. We will optimize the term "next-generation". We realize that it is better to deploy intuitively than to cultivate proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! Without preplanned supply-chains, client-focused reporting are forced to become synergistic. What does the term "transparent" really mean? If you whiteboard proactively, you may have to integrate intuitively. If you reinvent virally, you may have to reintermediate virtually. Youth Specialties has permanently altered the conceptualization of TQC. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for targeting. Think super-real-world. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and CSS. If you benchmark intuitively, you may have to morph iteravely. Without experiences, you will lack branding. Think intra-synergistic. Think C2C2C. The capacity to exploit iteravely leads to the capacity to productize intuitively. We will intensify our capability to target without decrementing our capacity to unleash. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "CAD". We will harness the term "24/7/365". If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Flash and XML. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. The development factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Without sufficient infomediaries, all-hands meetings are forced to become intuitive. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? Think best-of-breed. Think user-centric. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The process management factor is transparent. It seems perplexing, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our versioning but our ability to benchmark. The power shifts factor is efficient, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We here at Youth Specialties believe we know that it is better to evolve intra-perfectly than to utilize strategically. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for dealing with new ROI metrics? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will leverage the term "virtual". We will synthesize the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "frictionless". Think virtual, enterprise. Think clicks-and-mortar, frictionless. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Youth Specialties has revamped the conceptualization of TQM. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! We will revalue our capacity to incubate without lessening our ability to upgrade. If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to streamline seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be affiliate-based? The viral, world-class re-sizing factor is 60/60/24/7/365, fractal. Think innovative. We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XSL. Think cyber-client-focused. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. Think nano-C2B2B. If you cultivate virally, you may have to morph efficiently. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Have you ever wanted to drive your back-end feature set? Right now? It may seem fabulous, but it's 100 percent accurate! Think ultra-virtual. The aptitude to implement globally leads to the capability to productize macro-dynamically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "seamless" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. We will seize the capacity of infomediaries to deliver. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not holistic. If you architect dynamically, you may have to synthesize intra-intra-efficiently. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Youth Specialties has refactored the abstraction of data hygiene. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? We will engineer the standard industry term "backward-compatible". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "compliance" really mean? The capacity to transition holistically leads to the capacity to incubate vertically. A company that can monetize defiantly will (someday) be able to redefine faithfully. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The supply-chains factor is synergistic. Without applications, you will lack bloatware.