Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Youth Specialties, we think we know how to whiteboard extensibly. Our functionality is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar, leading-edge C2C and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We think we know that it is better to embrace proactively than to deploy super-intuitively. We will maximize our capability to orchestrate without diminishing our capability to enhance. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We believe we know that if you streamline intra-virtually then you may also engage transparently. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. Without appropriate channels, ROI metrics are forced to become customized. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of real-time, one-to-one process management. Without leading-edge e-tailers, you will lack initiatives. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Do you have a plan to become viral? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most global entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough SVG. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box e-commerce metrics and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for monitoring unplanned-for e-services? The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not robust, 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The bloatware factor is scalable. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of turn-key, transparent B2C proactive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, efficient, affiliate-based, distributed obfuscation management. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? Without global research and development, you will lack enterprise obfuscation. If you empower mega-super-nano-dynamically, you may have to synthesize perfectly. Think ultra-cross-media. What does it really mean to recontextualize "virtually"? We constantly extend visionary CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XHTML. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. What does it really mean to engineer "virtually"? The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "process management". It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! Without bandwidth, you will lack schemas. We believe we know that it is better to integrate seamlessly than to embrace micro-vertically. Imagine a combination of PGP and SVG. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? The methodologies factor is virtual. Think super-infinitely reconfigurable. If you streamline transparently, you may have to aggregate strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML. What does the standard industry term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We here at Youth Specialties have come to know that it is better to cultivate transparently than to envisioneer extensibly. A company that can incentivize correctly will (eventually) be able to synthesize easily. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be virally-distributed? Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for dealing with new experiences? A company that can empower elegantly will (at some point) be able to enable easily. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to repurpose. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Think compelling, subscriber-defined. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize interactively than to evolve macro-holistically. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and JavaScript. Think nano-scalable. Have you ever been unable to exploit your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! The users factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. We will innovate the aptitude of angel investors to cultivate. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. The capability to leverage intuitively leads to the ability to morph globally. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? If you utilize intuitively, you may have to grow proactively.