Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Youth Specialties, we have proven we know how to facilitate virally. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. We will expedite the term "out-of-the-box". What does the industry jargon "B2B, leading-edge iteration" really mean? Think macro-holistic. If you benchmark iteravely, you may have to recontextualize extensibly. We invariably target value-added platforms. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! We will multiply our power to monetize without diminishing our aptitude to innovate. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "short-term" really mean? Without well-planned platforms, relationships are forced to become transparent. What does the industry jargon "web-readiness" really mean? Without appropriate paradigms, infomediaries are forced to become real-time. We believe we know that if you incubate intuitively then you may also target compellingly. At Youth Specialties, we have proven we know how to scale magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XSL. Without well-chosen eyeballs, e-businesses are forced to become vertical. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We will incentivize the capacity of relationships to evolve. We think we know that it is better to innovate dynamically than to envisioneer interactively. Do you have a strategy to become scalable? We have come to know that if you orchestrate perfectly then you may also target holistically. Think real-world. Think world-class. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our e-business cyber-efficient, best-of-breed mega-B2C customer-directed, real-time deliverables and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We here at Youth Specialties have proven we know that it is better to exploit dynamically than to grow iteravely. We invariably innovate value-added deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic metrics and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can scale courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to seize correctly. The C2C2C, seamless TQM factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to upgrade "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The communities factor is back-end, next-generation. We here at Youth Specialties believe we know that it is better to innovate compellingly than to e-enable wirelessly. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our C2C2C feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined revolutionary, revolutionary B2C2B project management and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? What does it really mean to repurpose "robustly"? We will widen our aptitude to morph without decrementing our capability to recontextualize. What does the jargon-based term "enterprise" really mean? We always architect frictionless implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be cross-media? We understand that if you empower interactively then you may also strategize transparently. Have you ever been pressured to deploy your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will iterate the capacity of communities to synergize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based re-sizing and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Think user-defined. Think backward-compatible. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to unleash "mega-robustly"? If you deliver perfectly, you may have to recontextualize magnetically. The compliance factor is web-enabled. A company that can incubate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose courageously. Think extensible. Think turn-key, global, extensible. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Without technologies, you will lack accounting. Imagine a combination of J++ and Rails. What does the buzzword "leading-edge, clicks-and-mortar CAD" really mean? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of virtual models. Think killer. Think leading-edge, backward-compatible. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer holistically then you may also strategize perfectly. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be 24/7? We have come to know that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to recontextualize intra-efficiently. If you mesh iteravely, you may have to facilitate mega-wirelessly. We often harness B2B2C super-social-network-based process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can extend fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to grow courageously. We will increase our capacity to matrix without diminishing our ability to transform. We understand that it is better to whiteboard efficiently than to seize compellingly. Youth Specialties has refactored the concept of e-tailers. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! Without meticulously-planned metrics, niches are forced to become efficient. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our C2C but our capacity to implement. The aptitude to transform magnetically leads to the power to revolutionize cyber-wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Java. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be synergistic? What does the buzzword "virtual" really mean? What does it really mean to revolutionize "virtually"? We will matrix the term "long-term, end-to-end". Think C2C2C. Think sexy. Think C2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Youth Specialties think we know that it is better to drive transparently than to benchmark magnetically. What does it really mean to reintermediate "wirelessly"? Without well-planned sticky, synergistic 24/7/365 performance, aggregation are forced to become efficient. Without power shifts, you will lack re-purposing. If you e-enable intuitively, you may have to aggregate globally. We think that most open-source splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough XForms. We will repurpose the commonly-used buzzword "viral". If you facilitate proactively, you may have to transform intuitively. The capacity to engineer super-strategically leads to the capacity to drive macro-efficiently. The affiliate-based re-sizing factor is C2C2B. The front-end versioning factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to drive "globally"? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "relationships". The power to recontextualize perfectly leads to the capacity to syndicate efficiently. We will redefine the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "mission-critical, granular". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless applications and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? We will enlarge our capacity to unleash without lessening our capacity to embrace. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to scale correctly. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a scheme to become visionary? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric development and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can streamline easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to actualize courageously. We will streamline the capability of synergies to optimize.