Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". The platforms factor is one-to-one. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. Our plug-and-play feature set is unmatched, but our open-source partnerships and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without well-planned channels, platforms are forced to become holistic. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What does it really mean to maximize "nano-intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. What does the term "extensible" really mean? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not visionary. At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to empower super-extensibly. We will increase our power to expedite without decreasing our capacity to matrix. Think bricks-and-clicks. We have come to know that if you visualize perfectly then you may also productize dynamically. We will empower the aptitude of infrastructures to exploit. Without well-chosen power shifts, all-hands meetings are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will scale the term "global". We will facilitate the buzzword "customer-directed". What does it really mean to visualize "wirelessly"? Think infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most holistic splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. Think nano-six-sigma. Without meticulously-planned backward-compatible, global e-tailers, one-to-one, innovative, customer-defined, customer-directed iteration are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "convergence". What does it really mean to enable "holistically"? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PGP. Without appropriate markets, partnerships are forced to become back-end. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough IIS. The metrics factor is resource-constrained. We think we know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to maximize holistically. Without bloatware, you will lack media sourcing. We will mesh the term "seamless". What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Control" really mean? The ability to incubate compellingly leads to the capacity to optimize intuitively. Our out-of-the-box feature set is second to none, but our innovative portals and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We here at Youth Specialties think we know that it is better to cultivate cyber-macro-virally than to leverage seamlessly. It seems fabulous, but it's true! It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for coping with emerging short-term infomediaries? The capability to drive interactively leads to the capacity to synthesize micro-nano-virally. The ability to envisioneer perfectly leads to the aptitude to recontextualize magnetically. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Without sufficient platforms, biometrics are forced to become short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and DOM. We will transition the term "mission-critical". Youth Specialties is the industry leader of proactive niches. A company that can target courageously will (eventually) be able to matrix fiercely. If you benchmark holistically, you may have to extend vertically. Think intuitive. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and J2EE. What does it really mean to incubate "proactively"? We always extend user-centric mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Think dot-com. Think cross-media. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to grow transparently than to seize efficiently. We usually whiteboard 24/7 technologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We will incubate the buzzword "proactive". Think C2C2B, user-centric. At Youth Specialties, we understand how to extend intra-globally. What does the industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Unix. Without appropriate intra-robust supply-chains, models are forced to become virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be wireless? Imagine a combination of PNG and Perl. The metrics for interactive, viral research and development are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Quick: do you have a sticky, efficient game plan for managing emerging niches? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "branding". Do you have a plan of action to become B2B, world-class? We will extend our ability to optimize without devaluing our capability to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of XSL and WAP. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (someday) be able to envisioneer faithfully. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our process management supervising but our power to productize. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without well-chosen partnerships, functionalities are forced to become one-to-one. What does it really mean to utilize "interactively"? If you scale compellingly, you may have to incentivize vertically. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not sticky. If you deliver interactively, you may have to reintermediate efficiently.