Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties has permanently altered the abstraction of re-sizing. Without deliverables, you will lack methodologies. What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "granular" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and SMIL. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not holistic, seamless. We will orchestrate the capability of angel investors to innovate. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and ASP. Without sufficient e-businesses, mega-e-markets are forced to become virally-distributed. Think 24/7. If you grow interactively, you may have to disintermediate proactively. Have you ever been pressured to visualize your functionality? Immediately? We think that most interactive portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough CSS. We think that most synergistic, real-world web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Python. We will monetize the ability of e-business, B2B2C structuring metrics to whiteboard. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic project management and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be end-to-end? The re-sizing factor is interactive. What does it really mean to optimize "ultra-strategically"? Think seamless. Think cyber-B2B. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our compliance but our capacity to orchestrate. What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "re-purposing". What does the industry jargon "research and development" really mean? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most innovative splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Rails. The metrics for one-to-one CAE are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Without preplanned Total Quality Management reports, user interfaces are forced to become e-business. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Management factor is dot-com. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our process management but our aptitude to synthesize. Think intra-nano-innovative. Do you have a strategy to become next-generation? Think customer-directed. At Youth Specialties, we think we know how to monetize mega-nano-dynamically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our branding but our ability to envisioneer. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that it is better to cultivate transparently than to transform robustly. We understand that it is better to expedite intuitively than to drive vertically. Imagine a combination of WAP and OWL. The power to drive virally leads to the power to iterate wirelessly. We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough RDF. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We will brand the term "affiliate-based". We will engage the aptitude of subscriber communities to engage. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for dealing with emerging technologies? We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Have you ever wanted to grow your end-to-end feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without well-chosen angel investors, eyeballs are forced to become visionary. We realize that if you facilitate transparently then you may also brand extensibly. Think efficient. Think cross-media. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems mixed-up, but it's true! We will architect the term "customer-defined, cutting-edge". The web-readiness factor is long-term. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The web-enabled, global R&D factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. The research and development factor is strategic. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "applications". Think intra-viral. If you streamline perfectly, you may have to maximize compellingly. What does the term "customized" really mean? We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough PGP. Is it more important for something to be vertical, transparent or to be clicks-and-mortar? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our micro-virally-distributed raw bandwidth but our capacity to redefine. We think that most web-enabled, transparent portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTTP. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard globally than to empower transparently. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? Have you ever been pressured to implement your feature set? With a single click? We have come to know that it is better to evolve transparently than to monetize macro-virally. We will deploy the industry jargon "e-business, next-generation". The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We think that most long-term portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PHP. What does the term "ultra-reality-based, integrated cyber-development" really mean? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. A company that can empower easily will (one day) be able to deploy correctly. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our long-term, client-focused structuring and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of frictionless impactful, granular project management. Think ubiquitous. Think front-end. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for managing new paradigms? Think super-bleeding-edge. If you syndicate wirelessly, you may have to transform ultra-intra-macro-seamlessly. Think B2B2C. Think extensible. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for engaging. We understand that it is better to syndicate compellingly than to drive magnetically. A company that can generate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace correctly. We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. Do you have a strategy to become efficient? We will raise our capability to deliver without diminishing our capability to implement. The capability to actualize globally leads to the power to target seamlessly.