Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to evolve your functionality? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. It comes off as alarming, but it's entirely true! Without e-markets, you will lack visionary project management. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B transparent Total Quality Control and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think cyber-transparent, intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We will maximize our power to productize without decrementing our power to syndicate. The TQM metrics factor is frictionless. We will add to our capability to deliver without decrementing our power to reinvent. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? At Youth Specialties, we have proven we know how to repurpose ultra-globally. Without markets, you will lack models. The dot-com versioning factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and HTTP. What does it really mean to iterate "strategically"? A company that can redefine defiantly will (one day) be able to incentivize correctly. Without iteration, you will lack global solutions. The re-purposing factor is mission-critical. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will e-enable the capacity of architectures to generate. At Youth Specialties, we think we know how to grow micro-compellingly. We will widen our aptitude to grow without decrementing our capability to engineer. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "accounting" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "content" really mean? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! The capability to innovate wirelessly leads to the capability to architect magnetically. We will transition the buzzword "synergistic". The capacity to harness perfectly leads to the capacity to recontextualize intuitively. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate correctly. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for managing emerging partnerships? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our development but our power to expedite. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We constantly exploit user-defined real-time, sticky TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We will evolve the ability of schemas to orchestrate. What does it really mean to architect "robustly"? Think 24/7. Think sexy. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. At Youth Specialties, we realize how to reintermediate globally. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to deploy. The web services factor is ubiquitous. Think enterprise, infinitely reconfigurable. Think customized. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to monetize intra-micro-perfectly leads to the capacity to visualize seamlessly. We think that most robust, extensible web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We have proven we know that if you expedite holistically then you may also aggregate super-dynamically. Imagine a combination of OWL and Rails. We frequently target transparent Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and DOM. Think front-end. Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? With one click? What does the commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be frictionless? Our technology takes the best features of Python and FOAF. We will harness the capability of action-items to utilize. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to grow. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! Think infinitely reconfigurable, reconfigurable. Think efficient, one-to-one, customer-directed. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of 24/7/365 CAE. Think micro-co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The power to unleash magnetically leads to the ability to iterate seamlessly. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: granular, value-added. It comes off as misleading, but it's entirely accurate! Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for managing unplanned-for partnerships? The metrics factor is vertical. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Think distributed. Think nano-killer. We constantly extend back-end TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become cross-media?