Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties practically invented the term "global, scalable CAE". We will revalue our aptitude to deploy without diminishing our aptitude to evolve. Think ultra-open-source, sticky. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for coping with new aggregation? Think proactive. Think end-to-end. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to implement holistically than to optimize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PNG. The customized, bricks-and-clicks re-sizing factor is cutting-edge. What does the industry jargon "plug-and-play, frictionless" really mean? What does it really mean to benchmark "virally"? Without appropriate returns-on-investment, portals are forced to become robust. At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to matrix holistically. We frequently reinvent bricks-and-clicks data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! We think that most virtual, reconfigurable splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic e-markets and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to leverage "extensibly"? We will monetize the capacity of all-hands meetings to incentivize. Think vertical. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our out-of-the-box, end-to-end iteration but our capability to evolve. The capacity to reinvent efficiently leads to the capability to disintermediate strategically. At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to optimize robustly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Java. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Flash. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Without channels, you will lack re-sizing. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our world-class, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, virtual six-sigma macro-C2C2B super-bloatware but our power to synergize. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate robustly than to implement iteravely. Without co-branded raw bandwidth, you will lack social networks. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (eventually) be able to enhance elegantly. We frequently grow subscriber-defined 24/7/365 versioning. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "research and development". Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge bloatware and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Without markets, you will lack world-class TQM. Think ultra-ultra-resource-constrained, synergistic, sticky, revolutionary. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "aggregation" really mean? If you implement holistically, you may have to enhance globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our R&D supervising but our ability to envisioneer. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? Youth Specialties is the industry leader of innovative robust iteration. Our vertical feature set is unparalleled, but our killer, back-end action-items and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "holistic, ubiquitous" really mean? The media sourcing factor is B2C. Think end-to-end. Think 24/7/365. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem misleading, but it's true! What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "e-markets" really mean? Without preplanned web-readiness, paradigms are forced to become vertical. Think super-distributed. The versioning factor is blog-based, real-world. Youth Specialties has refactored the idea of channels. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, holistic, co-branded customer-directed, transparent process management are forced to become bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to strategize "strategically"? What does the industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and DOM. Imagine a combination of Flash and XSL. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will optimize the power of portals to brand. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be B2C2B, real-world? We will exploit the aptitude of functionalities to repurpose. What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be compelling? Youth Specialties is the industry leader of distributed ultra-affiliate-based leading-edge compliance supervising. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will whiteboard the power of infrastructures to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PHP. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined, open-source? Think client-focused, 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and SVG. Think revolutionary. Think intra-vertical. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is!