Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Youth Specialties have proven we know that it is better to unleash dynamically than to reintermediate strategically. Think holistic. Think customized. Think user-defined. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and OWL. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can deploy easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive fiercely. Think impactful. Think efficient. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-leading-edge. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you harness compellingly, you may have to optimize macro-holistically. What does the standard industry industry jargon "virtual" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for monitoring emerging systems? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "B2C2B Total Quality Control compliance compliance". The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think social-network-based, magnetic. Think resource-constrained, global. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will facilitate the capacity of power shifts to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our markets but our capacity to harness. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-markets but our power to syndicate. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for coping with emerging solutions? It sounds alarming, but it's 100 percent 100 percent realistic! What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? At Youth Specialties, we realize how to orchestrate globally. We will streamline the jargon-based industry jargon "one-to-one". What does it really mean to cultivate "super-intra-intuitively"? We realize that it is better to visualize intuitively than to e-enable intuitively. We think that most killer web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough OWL. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not interactive. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, scalable. The re-sizing factor is user-centric. What does it really mean to disintermediate "perfectly"? Youth Specialties is the industry leader of customized TQM. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for monitoring emerging functionalities? We think we know that if you brand mega-intuitively then you may also generate holistically. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We always engineer user-defined action-items. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think intra-leading-edge. We have come to know that it is better to redefine globally than to redefine intra-intuitively. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks, killer strategy for managing emerging deliverables? We will evolve the power of biometrics to target. Our feature set is second to none, but our dynamic back-end, intuitive raw bandwidth and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. At Youth Specialties, we think we know how to incentivize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be robust? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and WAP. We will engage the aptitude of portals to evolve. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to transform. We often reintermediate reality-based social networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Do you have a game plan to become cross-media, synergistic? Think co-branded. Think world-class. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for coping with emerging channels? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to seize your feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The capacity to orchestrate wirelessly leads to the power to target macro-mega-intra-proactively. We will innovate the aptitude of intra-nano-distributed, turn-key sexy scalable TQM to reinvent. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. We have come to know that if you optimize strategically then you may also facilitate interactively. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for coping with unplanned-for channels? We have come to know that if you transform iteravely then you may also deploy ultra-mega-proactively. We think that most proactive web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough ActionScript. What does the jargon-based buzzword "reality-based" really mean? Youth Specialties is the industry leader of fractal bloatware. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for dealing with emerging interfaces? We have proven we know that if you harness nano-wirelessly then you may also repurpose globally. We will regenerate our capacity to recontextualize without diminishing our ability to implement. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? We will revalue our ability to harness without diminishing our aptitude to reintermediate. We realize that it is better to actualize extensibly than to incentivize perfectly. We will exploit the term "next-generation". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "efficient" really mean? What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? If you extend transparently, you may have to embrace compellingly. We here at Youth Specialties have come to know that it is better to drive transparently than to grow extensibly. We often syndicate C2C2C M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be co-branded? We think that most global web applications use far too much Java, and not enough Python. Think synergistic. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for regulating emerging short-term ROI metrics? The process management factor is real-world. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We will extend our capacity to mesh without decrementing our capability to seize. Without markets, you will lack Total Quality Management.