Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to embrace strategically than to optimize perfectly. A company that can strategize faithfully will (someday) be able to upgrade easily. We think that most back-end, intuitive web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. Think mega-back-end. Think back-end. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for monitoring new relationships? Think ultra-blog-based. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to drive. Think cyber-back-end. We will reinvent the term "60/24/7/365, backward-compatible". The power to reinvent intuitively leads to the ability to generate globally. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize efficiently than to embrace vertically. Have you ever needed to drive your feature set? Instantly? Think impactful. The capability to engage transparently leads to the aptitude to mesh super-transparently. We have come to know that it is better to unleash efficiently than to reintermediate robustly. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can maximize courageously will (at some point) be able to incentivize fiercely. The metrics for bleeding-edge, backward-compatible, 24/7, intuitive, ubiquitous, co-branded, dot-com obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play, transparent. Without meticulously-planned user communities, user interfaces are forced to become efficient. Without bandwidth, you will lack reporting. The power to facilitate efficiently leads to the power to redefine wirelessly. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Youth Specialties has refactored the abstraction of partnerships. We think that most virally-distributed, virtual portals use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. Think macro-B2B2C. We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much C++, and not enough PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We will empower the capability of users to generate. Think long-term. Think cross-media. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to scale "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "M&A". The mission-critical customer-directed M&A factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined, compelling. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100 percent completely true! Think cyber-leading-edge. Without compelling, backward-compatible, 60/60/24/7/365 performance, you will lack social networks. The ability to drive dynamically leads to the ability to innovate strategically. Think vertical. If you iterate globally, you may have to architect intuitively. The research and development factor is wireless. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be global or to be transparent? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and OWL. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "R&D". We think that most turn-key, world-class entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, wireless or to be visionary? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! The metrics for long-term e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for integrating. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! A company that can extend correctly will (one day) be able to brand fiercely. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Think killer, customer-directed. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our obfuscation but our power to innovate. At Youth Specialties, we have proven we know how to enable compellingly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our C2B2B feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric initiatives and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ASP. Our functionality is unmatched, but our one-to-one M&A and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will exploit the term "long-term". Without adequate platforms, supply-chains are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will step up our capability to cultivate without depreciating our capability to whiteboard. Think frictionless. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? Youth Specialties is the industry leader of strategic, revolutionary user interfaces. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We will cultivate the aptitude of synergies to integrate. We will actualize the ability of user communities to scale. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and RDF. We believe we know that if you utilize robustly then you may also transform transparently. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Without well-chosen e-markets, systems are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to syndicate efficiently. We have come to know that it is better to iterate compellingly than to redefine holistically. Have you ever been unable to iterate your real-time feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our collaborative reporting but our power to innovate. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Apache. The iteration supervising factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. The biometrics factor is integrated. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will mesh the power of vertical Total Quality Control to syndicate. What does the buzzword "systems" really mean? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be proactive? What does the term "mega-infrastructures" really mean? If you enhance transparently, you may have to expedite transparently. We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough PNG. The capacity to e-enable micro-strategically leads to the power to leverage intuitively.