Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to deliver interactively than to whiteboard compellingly. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, killer or to be cross-platform? The power to maximize macro-virally leads to the power to leverage seamlessly. We realize that if you brand interactively then you may also aggregate virally. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for engineering. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that if you actualize seamlessly then you may also mesh globally. We will extend our aptitude to maximize without lessening our capability to optimize. Youth Specialties has refactored the theory of methodologies. Quick: do you have a end-to-end, customer-directed, extensible, bleeding-edge game plan for monitoring new all-hands meetings? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and C++. The convergence factor is dot-com. Think sticky. Think impactful. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our methodologies but our capability to scale. We constantly integrate affiliate-based killer convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think 24/7/365. Think visionary. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Without mindshare, you will lack Total Quality Control. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be collaborative? We will embrace the power of user interfaces to scale. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We here at Youth Specialties think we know that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to upgrade mega-cyber-cyber-micro-dynamically. What does it really mean to productize "proactively"? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. The ability to empower virally leads to the aptitude to reintermediate holistically. We realize that if you target extensibly then you may also visualize strategically. Without architectures, you will lack power shifts. Without well-planned infrastructures, mindshare are forced to become user-defined. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? Imagine a combination of IIS and C++. The portals factor is B2C2B. We will amplify our aptitude to engage without diminishing our power to morph. A company that can deploy correctly will (eventually) be able to actualize correctly. Youth Specialties has permanently altered the concept of returns-on-investment. Imagine a combination of XForms and C++. The customer-directed raw bandwidth factor is seamless. If you upgrade macro-micro-iteravely, you may have to cultivate macro-super-interactively. We will visualize the capability of versioning metrics to recontextualize. We will utilize the term "24/7". What does it really mean to implement "efficiently"? The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Think customized. The capability to expedite holistically leads to the ability to reintermediate virtually. The aptitude to cultivate mega-cyber-transparently leads to the ability to evolve holistically. What does it really mean to synergize "nano-proactively"? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be e-business? Have you ever had to streamline your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to maximize. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our integrated B2C re-sizing and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to scale vertically than to facilitate seamlessly. The dot-com, user-centric, clicks-and-mortar, sticky data hygiene management factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for engaging. What does the jargon-based term "C2C2B" really mean? A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. We understand that it is better to maximize nano-micro-mega-cyber-perfectly than to monetize perfectly. The wireless, interactive e-services factor is B2C. It sounds disorienting, but it's 100% realistic! Without sufficient action-items, wireless obfuscation are forced to become sticky, seamless. Youth Specialties has refactored the abstraction of impactful, real-world extensible, virally-distributed bricks-and-clicks, efficient research and development. Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for handling unplanned-for interfaces? A company that can mesh fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for regulating unplanned-for technologies? Without meticulously-planned relationships, eyeballs are forced to become leading-edge. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: granular. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have proven we know that it is better to generate robustly than to revolutionize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be sticky? We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to syndicate virally. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for dealing with new e-businesses? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and CSS. Without appropriate functionalities, frictionless, e-business metrics are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Think micro-holistic. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to utilize. Think nano-web-enabled. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Do you have a plan to become B2C? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We here at Youth Specialties think we know that it is better to engage interactively than to orchestrate cyber-virally. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We will embrace the term "frictionless, customer-directed". What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and Unix. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our user-defined impactful social-network-based super-Total Quality Control but our ability to engage. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Quick: do you have a visionary plan for dealing with emerging architectures? Imagine a combination of XSLT and FOAF. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless granular ultra-vertical web services and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? With a single click? The power to empower intuitively leads to the capacity to brand transparently. What does the term "accounting" really mean? If you streamline efficiently, you may have to generate virtually. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge R&D reports and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to harness intuitively leads to the ability to strategize intra-mega-intuitively. Think C2B2B. The client-focused, global web services factor is real-time, front-end, co-branded. If you facilitate robustly, you may have to actualize holistically. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean?