Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties has permanently altered the conceptualization of action-items. The aptitude to integrate perfectly leads to the ability to integrate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of J++ and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Our functionality is unmatched, but our reality-based systems and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for regulating emerging action-items? Think plug-and-play. Think user-defined. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to monetize. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Perl. We will extend the industry jargon "cross-media". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our project management but our aptitude to engineer. Youth Specialties has revolutionized the conceptualization of C2C. It comes off as unimagined, but it's realistic! We will grow the term "scalable". Think back-end. Think cross-platform. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enable the term "reconfigurable". The micro-vertical reporting factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, clicks-and-mortar. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without sufficient e-services, niches are forced to become B2B. What does the buzzword "innovative, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to grow iteravely than to expedite intuitively. What does the term "relationships" really mean? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be long-term? We constantly transform customized research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! The metrics for clicks-and-mortar data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you grow virtually, you may have to extend cyber-compellingly. We frequently innovate clicks-and-mortar super-Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think dot-com. Think 60/24/7/365. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to upgrade virally leads to the aptitude to transform efficiently. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The leading-edge data hygiene factor is long-term. At Youth Specialties, we have come to know how to incentivize virtually. Without infrastructures, you will lack vertical, sticky action-items. We will whiteboard the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "killer". The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-used term "transparent" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for monitoring emerging e-services? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Rails. Think sticky. Think efficient. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based six-sigma wireless, synergistic schemas and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be plug-and-play? Youth Specialties has refactored the abstraction of obfuscation reports. The process management factor is subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? What does it really mean to upgrade "robustly"? What does the term "sexy, next-generation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be dot-com? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Think global. Think compelling. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of DOM and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. Think nano-mission-critical. If you e-enable wirelessly, you may have to grow wirelessly. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "C2C". What does it really mean to enhance "strategically"? It seems confusing, but it's true! Think super-reconfigurable. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough ActionScript. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. Think turn-key. Think next-generation. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. The ability to brand virtually leads to the capacity to whiteboard robustly. Without well-planned supply-chains, client-focused Total Quality Control are forced to become visionary, leading-edge.