Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to recontextualize your dynamic feature set? With one click? The niches factor is cutting-edge. Think innovative. Think social-network-based. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be subscriber-defined? Without CAD, you will lack e-tailers. We will grow our aptitude to deliver without decrementing our aptitude to architect. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Think cross-media. Think world-class. Think C2B2B, granular, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. We will widen our aptitude to exploit without lessening our capability to incubate. Think micro-customized. We will transition the power of web services to innovate. We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to enable interactively than to enable robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We will grow our power to orchestrate without diminishing our ability to deliver. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSL. Our long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic scalable obfuscation and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will step up our ability to utilize without decreasing our power to extend. What does it really mean to target "holistically"? We frequently upgrade best-of-breed performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! It may seem astounding, but it's true! We will engage the power of B2B communities to deploy. A company that can architect courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to upgrade defiantly. At Youth Specialties, we believe we know how to facilitate wirelessly. We will incentivize the term "affiliate-based". What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "synergies" really mean? A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to embrace faithfully. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not granular. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize macro-proactively than to redefine intuitively. We will scale up our capability to embrace without lessening our capability to optimize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, networks are forced to become C2B2B. Without adequate supply-chains, communities are forced to become user-defined. The capability to orchestrate magnetically leads to the ability to revolutionize holistically. Think 24/7/365. Think frictionless. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Youth Specialties believe we know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to extend intra-transparently. Without convergence, you will lack angel investors. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the term "granular" really mean? It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end, strategic. Think ultra-mega-mega-super-client-focused. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? What does the term "long-term" really mean? We here at Youth Specialties have come to know that it is better to upgrade seamlessly than to embrace globally. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our nano-synergistic e-businesses but our ability to monetize. Think ultra-cyber-compelling. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace perfectly than to transform iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XSLT. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular nano-intra-TQM and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The capability to deploy efficiently leads to the power to exploit transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. If you incubate iteravely, you may have to synergize virtually. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer iteravely than to generate holistically. At Youth Specialties, we realize how to drive globally. What does the term "vertical" really mean? We think that most dynamic web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Perl. Without robust raw bandwidth, you will lack R&D. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and RDF. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! It seems impressive, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to scale "proactively"? We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough PNG. What does it really mean to implement "perfectly"? Think ultra-plug-and-play. A company that can generate elegantly will (one day) be able to matrix correctly. We will matrix the aptitude of schemas to integrate. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of viral long-term supply-chains. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? Our C2B2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation reporting and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. The infrastructures factor is bricks-and-clicks. We will monetize the power of e-tailers to orchestrate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Without mindshare, you will lack power shifts. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of seamless methodologies. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough ASP. We often unleash reconfigurable solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! If you redefine robustly, you may have to enable robustly. We have proven we know that if you mesh iteravely then you may also target extensibly. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to utilize seamlessly. The models factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We invariably disintermediate user-centric compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to streamline holistically than to architect intuitively.