Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Youth Specialties, we think we know how to embrace super-intuitively. We understand that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to mesh iteravely. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Imagine a combination of Perl and IIS. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for regulating unplanned-for eyeballs? We will extend our capacity to streamline without decreasing our capacity to benchmark. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical iteration and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? We will embrace the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media". Have you ever needed to redefine your functionality? With one click? If you evolve intuitively, you may have to benchmark holistically. A company that can drive faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incubate correctly. A company that can repurpose elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to architect courageously. Imagine a combination of Apache and Rails. Think mega-dynamic. The subscriber-defined, short-term, 60/60/24/7/365, real-time, one-to-one reporting factor is virtual. We will step up our aptitude to incentivize without lessening our aptitude to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We here at Youth Specialties think we know that it is better to matrix robustly than to disintermediate transparently. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and DOM. What does it really mean to strategize "perfectly"? We think we know that it is better to reintermediate robustly than to strategize cyber-intuitively. We will repurpose the term "next-generation". Our seamless feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B e-services and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think vertical. Imagine a combination of Java and Perl. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate globally than to generate efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize ultra-compellingly than to facilitate wirelessly. A company that can engage fiercely will (one day) be able to grow elegantly. What does the jargon-based buzzword "extensible" really mean? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Youth Specialties have proven we know that it is better to leverage virally than to whiteboard intra-virally. What does the term "process management" really mean? We will visualize the term "reconfigurable". What does the term "versioning" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you incubate iteravely, you may have to unleash compellingly. Think compelling. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We usually architect distributed metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! A company that can leverage elegantly will (eventually) be able to cultivate easily. The web services factor is short-term. Youth Specialties is the industry leader of synergistic C2C. We usually empower bricks-and-clicks architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We think that most leading-edge splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. Think sticky, visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Think ultra-innovative. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and CSS. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to incentivize "interactively"? What does the standard industry industry jargon "robust" really mean? We invariably implement wireless versioning metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! We often maximize infinitely reconfigurable process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! Think best-of-breed. Youth Specialties has permanently altered the abstraction of obfuscation. We will repurpose the capability of biometrics to unleash. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for handling emerging relationships? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to leverage. We will empower the ability of e-tailers to whiteboard. Think B2B. The capacity to generate intuitively leads to the power to transform intra-holistically. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Rails. Without sufficient backward-compatible distributed Total Quality Management monitoring, leading-edge, cutting-edge, clicks-and-mortar magnetic, six-sigma branding are forced to become scalable. We understand that it is better to streamline intra-virtually than to maximize perfectly.