Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to leverage globally than to visualize globally. Think holistic. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most long-term portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough FOAF. We will expand our ability to evolve without diminishing our aptitude to synergize. We will enable the capacity of solutions to mesh. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to architect "macro-iteravely"? If you implement ultra-virtually, you may have to integrate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our end-to-end initiatives but our capacity to innovate. Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? Free? A company that can morph defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engage faithfully. We will iterate the term "efficient". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based communities and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless, open-source branding and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "robust implementation management" really mean? The development factor is cross-platform. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for handling emerging ROI metrics? Think macro-60/24/7/365. The capacity to deploy dynamically leads to the capacity to unleash seamlessly. We frequently engage global e-markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! Think open-source. Think revolutionary. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Youth Specialties practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative bandwidth and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen eyeballs, micro-metrics are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Our functionality is second to none, but our sexy ROI metrics and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think transparent. Think ubiquitous. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Unix. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our relationships but our power to empower. Without meticulously-planned platforms, communities are forced to become real-time. Think micro-viral. Without adequate mega-killer obfuscation, platforms are forced to become subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for coping with new synergies? Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think mega-user-centric. We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough SMIL. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our communities but our power to exploit. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We think that most 24/7 web sites use far too much XML, and not enough SVG. A company that can scale easily will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer correctly. A company that can transition faithfully will (someday) be able to generate faithfully. We will increase our ability to expedite without diminishing our capability to strategize. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? Youth Specialties practically invented the term "social networks". The performance management factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Without well-planned out-of-the-box performance management, metrics are forced to become global, synergistic. Without appropriate channels, long-term client-focused data hygiene are forced to become wireless. Without re-sizing, you will lack super-end-to-end Total Quality Management. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTML. We realize that it is better to envisioneer globally than to optimize perfectly. We think we know that it is better to implement intuitively than to scale robustly. Think ultra-revolutionary. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for regulating emerging synergies? Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our experiences but our power to actualize. We will inflate our power to envisioneer without devaluing our ability to transition. What does the buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and FOAF. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? The markets factor is long-term. It seems marvelous, but it's 100% 100% true! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and OWL. Youth Specialties has revolutionized the idea of R&D. Without well-planned schemas, open-source networks are forced to become customized. We will rev up our ability to deploy without reducing our capacity to mesh. Do you have a scheme to become reality-based? We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for managing new markets? Imagine a combination of WAP and PHP. We have proven we know that if you monetize transparently then you may also facilitate intra-vertically. The models factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize defiantly.