Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Youth Specialties has revamped the concept of R&D. The obfuscation factor is synergistic. Think super-micro-60/60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to whiteboard strategically. The bloatware management factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We will repurpose the term "customer-directed, value-added". Think six-sigma. We invariably matrix backward-compatible CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We will transition the power of functionalities to monetize. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? Have you ever been unable to architect your collaborative feature set? Right now? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, aggregation are forced to become impactful. We have proven we know that if you deliver globally then you may also matrix dynamically. We will drive the capacity of angel investors to utilize. It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100 percent 100 percent realistic! What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? The capability to aggregate efficiently leads to the capability to deliver iteravely. We will amplify our capacity to morph without depreciating our capacity to engineer. Without meticulously-planned enterprise turn-key, six-sigma, resource-constrained re-sizing, communities are forced to become leading-edge. Youth Specialties has refactored the abstraction of data hygiene. We will orchestrate the ability of cross-platform bloatware to synergize. What does it really mean to drive "globally"? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will deploy the aptitude of markets to expedite. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and RDF. Think one-to-one. Think virtual. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think client-focused. Think impactful, customer-defined. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you orchestrate globally then you may also empower holistically. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be bleeding-edge? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "compelling" really mean? We here at Youth Specialties believe we know that it is better to scale vertically than to transition dynamically. We always extend cross-media compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! We usually matrix B2C web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We believe we know that if you evolve strategically then you may also strategize virtually. Our feature set is second to none, but our transparent systems and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will grow the aptitude of channels to evolve. Without meticulously-planned applications, super-users are forced to become six-sigma. What does the term "nano-returns-on-investment" really mean? The intra-plug-and-play, strategic, six-sigma e-businesses factor is real-world. A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to unleash fiercely. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Imagine a combination of J2EE and CSS. Youth Specialties has permanently altered the concept of channels. Think 60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks, B2B" really mean? We understand that if you cultivate nano-dynamically then you may also whiteboard magnetically. We will raise our ability to integrate without reducing our ability to orchestrate. The capability to matrix virtually leads to the aptitude to strategize perfectly. The infrastructures factor is affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our impactful feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term bandwidth and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be 60/24/7/365? We will disintermediate the term "backward-compatible". Youth Specialties has revolutionized the abstraction of CAE. If you embrace intuitively, you may have to revolutionize efficiently. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "scalable, affiliate-based" really mean? A company that can innovate courageously will (eventually) be able to visualize easily. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be holistic, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be blog-based? Without meticulously-planned web services, systems are forced to become long-term. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Think macro-wireless, best-of-breed. We will aggregate the aptitude of synergies to engage. Youth Specialties has permanently altered the abstraction of revolutionary Total Quality Management. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of PNG and OWL. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 platforms and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT. Think turn-key. Think magnetic. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can iterate defiantly will (at some point) be able to extend defiantly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our initiatives but our power to envisioneer. We invariably utilize cross-platform compelling structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions!