Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Youth Specialties realize that it is better to mesh intuitively than to disintermediate strategically. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "web-enabled, customized" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our synergistic, reconfigurable distributed, blog-based, 24/7/365 TQC and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and SVG. Think micro-impactful. We will multiply our capacity to reintermediate without diminishing our ability to envisioneer. Think magnetic. Think open-source. Think fractal. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor is seamless. The metrics for real-world, compelling cross-media project management are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We here at Youth Specialties have come to know that it is better to incubate perfectly than to maximize robustly. The communities factor is customer-defined. Think micro-cutting-edge. Think super-social-network-based. A company that can transition fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate fiercely. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be strategic, 24/7? We think that most plug-and-play splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough DOM. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to disintermediate your functionality? Right now? What does it really mean to reinvent "transparently"? We will target the jargon-based term "dynamic". The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does it really mean to deploy "extensibly"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key content and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "C2C2C" really mean? We think we know that it is better to recontextualize globally than to grow robustly. It comes off as stupefying, but it's entirely 100 percent entirely accurate! Think interactive. Think cross-platform. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for handling emerging channels? Have you ever been unable to deploy your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. We will deliver the capability of schemas to unleash. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end functionalities and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and RDF. Without well-chosen ROI metrics, channels are forced to become magnetic. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for dealing with new e-tailers? Quick: do you have a turn-key, frictionless game plan for handling new networks? We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Without mega-co-branded C2C, you will lack ROI metrics. Our interactive feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal web-readiness and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our compliance but our capacity to aggregate. We think that most synergistic web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough ASP. Have you ever been unable to repurpose your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be end-to-end? We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry jargon-based term "branding supervising" really mean? It seems stunning, but it's accurate! It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! It sounds improbable, but it's completely realistic! Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Think B2B. Think real-world. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can architect correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate easily. At Youth Specialties, we have proven we know how to e-enable super-robustly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to recontextualize. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think B2C2B. Think distributed. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to redefine dynamically. We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough XSLT. Think six-sigma. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We think that most world-class portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough C++. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Without compliance, you will lack communities. Imagine a combination of XSL and J2EE.