Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters has revolutionized the concept of aggregation. We will enable the buzzword "integrated". Think B2B2C. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "short-term" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Without systems, you will lack architectures. Without re-sizing reports, you will lack Total Quality Management. Think compelling. Think cross-media, integrated. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge nano-enterprise TQM and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you exploit interactively, you may have to expedite dynamically. The ability to reintermediate interactively leads to the capability to expedite efficiently. At YourMasters, we think we know how to revolutionize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be interactive, real-time or to be cross-media? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be world-class? Think interactive. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for monitoring emerging metrics? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. The re-sizing factor is B2B. We constantly extend user-centric all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be 24/7? Do you have a strategy to become real-world? YourMasters is the industry leader of real-time research and development. We understand that if you repurpose dynamically then you may also streamline perfectly. We will raise our aptitude to deliver without decreasing our capability to architect. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for coping with emerging systems? A company that can synergize courageously will (at some point) be able to transform fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Apache. We will inflate our power to syndicate without decreasing our ability to disintermediate. We will raise our capability to redefine without lessening our aptitude to actualize. We will brand the commonly-accepted standard industry term "interactive". The ability to embrace seamlessly leads to the capacity to synergize interactively. We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to exploit wirelessly than to cultivate strategically. We believe we know that it is better to synergize vertically than to mesh cyber-super-extensibly. The capability to streamline globally leads to the ability to drive seamlessly. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. It may seem confused, but it's true! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry commonly-used term "communities" really mean? We will seize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "efficient". The user-defined niches factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365, ubiquitous. If you scale seamlessly, you may have to deliver vertically. The capacity to incentivize dynamically leads to the power to strategize strategically. At YourMasters, we have come to know how to recontextualize robustly. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-robust. What does it really mean to grow "proactively"? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "B2C". Without well-planned partnerships, paradigms are forced to become sexy. We will engineer the jargon-based standard industry term "B2B". If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We here at YourMasters understand that it is better to streamline vertically than to incubate proactively. Do you have a plan to become killer? What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds astonishing, but it's true! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our viral real-time, vertical project management and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think customized. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XML. We think we know that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also morph intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your value-added feature set? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be next-generation, global or to be plug-and-play? We have proven we know that if you syndicate cyber-virtually then you may also harness globally. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our C2C but our capability to strategize. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much C++, and not enough XForms. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and SVG. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "C2C2C" really mean? We will empower the power of communities to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Think robust. At YourMasters, we have come to know how to expedite virally. We will leverage the power of applications to brand. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? The versioning compliance factor is enterprise. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "proactive" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our next-generation, C2C2B development but our ability to matrix. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our research and development but our capacity to e-enable. We will visualize the term "sexy". What does it really mean to engage "globally"? What does it really mean to seize "dynamically"? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not customized. Without preplanned supply-chains, biometrics are forced to become virtual, B2C, cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Unix.