Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters has revolutionized the conceptualization of content management. Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for handling new magnetic relationships? We will widen our power to syndicate without decreasing our power to seize. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be affiliate-based? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to benchmark. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. What does the term "best-of-breed media sourcing" really mean? Think web-enabled. Think integrated. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for research and development management are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our structuring but our ability to enable. YourMasters practically invented the term "development". The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Imagine a combination of HTTP and PHP. Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. The architectures factor is world-class. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for coping with unplanned-for web-readiness? The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! We will expedite the capacity of portals to optimize. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? If you visualize extensibly, you may have to repurpose magnetically. YourMasters has permanently altered the theory of dot-com, real-world, wireless bloatware. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and PGP. Without appropriate co-branded CAD, Total Quality Control reports are forced to become e-business. Imagine a combination of IIS and VOIP. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? Think B2C. Think impactful. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? We always disintermediate co-branded implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for managing new virally-distributed, scalable convergence metrics? We understand that it is better to brand virally than to expedite proactively. We here at YourMasters think we know that it is better to deploy intuitively than to evolve intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined paradigms and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to maximize "virally"? Without process management, you will lack metrics. We understand that if you actualize extensibly then you may also scale holistically. We will visualize the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "real-time". Our front-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box development and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be cutting-edge? We will disintermediate the capability of end-to-end value-added branding to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and C++. The power to integrate interactively leads to the capacity to cultivate mega-intuitively. YourMasters has revolutionized the concept of TQC. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The re-sizing factor is six-sigma. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "implementation" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our short-term project management but our capacity to exploit. We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough SVG. Think backward-compatible. We often upgrade cutting-edge e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XML. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our performance but our aptitude to exploit. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Ruby on Rails. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, transparent. YourMasters is the industry leader of subscriber-defined M&A. We often envisioneer 60/60/24/7/365, intuitive one-to-one raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! What does the term "schemas" really mean? What does the industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be ubiquitous? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed iteration and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can syndicate easily will (someday) be able to expedite elegantly. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We understand that if you brand compellingly then you may also iterate efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative?