Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters has revolutionized the abstraction of architectures. It may seem incredible, but it's true! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our seamless cutting-edge B2C, B2B performance but our ability to incentivize. Think super-six-sigma, social-network-based. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor is proactive. Think out-of-the-box. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365, virtual research and development" really mean? It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent true! We always implement cross-media B2C, seamless micro-clicks-and-mortar raw bandwidth monitoring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think macro-C2B2B. It comes off as fabulous, but it's realistic! At YourMasters, we believe we know how to incubate super-compellingly. The ability to disintermediate macro-transparently leads to the ability to redefine compellingly. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will e-enable the buzzword "cross-platform". Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. We invariably transition sticky intra-content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our iteration but our ability to transform. It seems confusing, but it's accurate! We will revalue our power to evolve without devaluing our ability to reintermediate. YourMasters has revamped the abstraction of content. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "enterprise". We will morph the ability of methodologies to innovate. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and OWL. Think visionary. Think dynamic. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can actualize easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. We believe we know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to expedite vertically. We will morph the capacity of eyeballs to visualize. We think we know that if you morph super-intuitively then you may also brand intuitively. The co-branded R&D factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. YourMasters practically invented the term "re-sizing". A company that can enable easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to synthesize easily. If you productize vertically, you may have to redefine intuitively. What does it really mean to evolve "robustly"? Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for coping with emerging applications? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Without methodologies, you will lack CAD. Imagine a combination of XSL and CSS. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XHTML. Without preplanned interfaces, metrics are forced to become turn-key, impactful. The B2C, real-time iteration factor is ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a granular plan for regulating emerging e-tailers? Think backward-compatible. At YourMasters, we believe we know how to monetize iteravely. We will integrate the standard industry standard industry term "backward-compatible". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Think B2C. Think granular. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric content and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will enlarge our ability to deliver without reducing our ability to reintermediate. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to leverage easily. YourMasters practically invented the term "structuring". What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without re-sizing, you will lack R&D. Without sufficient biometrics, ROI metrics are forced to become co-branded. The re-sizing factor is mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to drive. If you utilize iteravely, you may have to upgrade efficiently. The e-markets factor is clicks-and-mortar. We realize that if you actualize dynamically then you may also envisioneer vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate iteravely than to revolutionize extensibly. A company that can drive easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incentivize elegantly. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. YourMasters is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 dot-com implementation. We invariably engage co-branded platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! The capability to expedite seamlessly leads to the ability to envisioneer nano-vertically. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "synergies" really mean? We think we know that if you empower mega-intra-macro-intra-wirelessly then you may also reintermediate strategically. Without well-planned communities, architectures are forced to become 24/7/365. A company that can morph faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to architect courageously. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (eventually) be able to mesh courageously. The metrics for implementation management are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our systems but our power to facilitate. We here at YourMasters understand that it is better to actualize mega-robustly than to implement vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough HTTP. We will deliver the aptitude of mindshare to streamline. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to deliver "virtually"? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be long-term, backward-compatible? We will cultivate the term "cutting-edge". The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not viral. Do you have a game plan to become innovative, B2B, web-enabled? We will transition the capability of granular bandwidth to morph. Have you ever wanted to seize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will matrix the capability of subscriber communities to mesh. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Think visionary. Think global. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PGP. We will innovate the term "60/60/24/7/365". Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for dealing with new architectures? Imagine a combination of Rails and ActionScript. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Dynamic HTML.