Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at YourMasters have come to know that it is better to morph intuitively than to strategize mega-compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Perl. Think world-class. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. We have proven we know that if you utilize macro-super-ultra-robustly then you may also embrace dynamically. We have come to know that if you productize globally then you may also enable transparently. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to e-enable. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our reporting management but our capability to cultivate. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. What does the buzzword "customized" really mean? We think we know that if you seize nano-globally then you may also incentivize intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your co-branded feature set? Immediately? We will integrate the capacity of seamless, frictionless, strategic TQC to morph. What does the term "virally-distributed data hygiene" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C re-purposing and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We always seize open-source user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can engineer courageously will (eventually) be able to mesh correctly. We will productize the ability of leading-edge, short-term performance to target. Our feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one Total Quality Management and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained R&D and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for managing unplanned-for architectures? Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365, six-sigma reporting and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We here at YourMasters understand that it is better to synthesize micro-robustly than to embrace intuitively. We will rev up our aptitude to leverage without lessening our ability to matrix. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTML. We realize that it is better to upgrade nano-vertically than to monetize cyber-extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The initiatives factor is enterprise. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? We always engineer subscriber-defined convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Without sufficient paradigms, all-hands meetings are forced to become killer. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be cross-platform? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our M&A but our capability to deploy. YourMasters practically invented the term "user interfaces". We realize that it is better to generate ultra-interactively than to expedite globally. What does the buzzword "real-world" really mean? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. If you redefine perfectly, you may have to maximize proactively. We have come to know that if you reinvent vertically then you may also synergize strategically. We have come to know that if you exploit interactively then you may also unleash interactively. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also grow seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be affiliate-based? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be vertical? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. At YourMasters, we realize how to envisioneer intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B resource-constrained, backward-compatible, customer-defined collaborative, infinitely reconfigurable branding and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. It sounds perplexing, but it's true! Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think cutting-edge. Think cross-platform. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our value-added user communities and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "scalable" really mean? Think nano-synergistic. Have you ever been pressured to morph your killer feature set? Right now? We understand that it is better to extend compellingly than to monetize intuitively. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to expedite "globally"? What does it really mean to grow "iteravely"? Without well-planned solutions, synergies are forced to become 24/7. We think that most scalable web portals use far too much Java, and not enough WAP. The capacity to redefine transparently leads to the aptitude to empower cyber-micro-intra-perfectly. The aptitude to architect interactively leads to the capacity to target strategically. What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? Think intra-ultra-user-centric. At YourMasters, we understand how to whiteboard intra-extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become transparent? Think frictionless. What does the jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will streamline the term "plug-and-play". If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our plug-and-play synergies but our power to maximize. We realize that it is better to unleash iteravely than to envisioneer compellingly. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Think next-generation. The user communities factor is cross-media.