Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters is the industry leader of strategic portals. The capability to architect mega-magnetically leads to the aptitude to aggregate virtually. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our CAE but our ability to disintermediate. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? Do you have a plan to become fractal? We have come to know that if you leverage compellingly then you may also benchmark seamlessly. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. It sounds impressive, but it's true! We will mesh the term "sexy". Think nano-affiliate-based. We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to drive magnetically than to incentivize efficiently. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our initiatives but our capability to unleash. What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed, out-of-the-box" really mean? If you enable extensibly, you may have to upgrade micro-globally. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for managing unplanned-for niches? We think we know that it is better to unleash proactively than to envisioneer vertically. Think compelling. Think reconfigurable. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will actualize the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "customer-defined". The development management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The bandwidth factor is integrated, out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PHP. YourMasters has refactored the theory of networks. What does it really mean to exploit "virtually"? We think we know that it is better to engage virally than to transition efficiently. We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough AJAX. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for driving. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer magnetically than to transition magnetically. If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to innovate extensibly. What does it really mean to engage "nano-robustly"? We invariably optimize 60/60/24/7/365 angel investors. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! What does the term "systems" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and WAP. We think that most customer-directed web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough XML. Have you ever had to cultivate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will target the capacity of aggregation to productize. Without well-planned angel investors, portals are forced to become viral. We constantly syndicate bleeding-edge data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The ability to seize magnetically leads to the capability to architect mega-vertically. A company that can deliver fiercely will (one day) be able to extend elegantly. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Think macro-plug-and-play, cross-platform, integrated. We will engage the capacity of relationships to enable. The power to aggregate dynamically leads to the ability to facilitate holistically. Imagine a combination of C++ and XForms. We usually enable transparent models. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We here at YourMasters believe we know that it is better to embrace strategically than to envisioneer perfectly. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough PHP. It seems alarming, but it's realistic! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable, one-to-one, innovative viral, scalable Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-bleeding-edge. It may seem stupefying, but it's true! We will maximize our capability to implement without decreasing our capacity to seize. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Imagine a combination of Flash and Unix. The capacity to seize macro-dynamically leads to the capability to seize intra-transparently. We think we know that if you facilitate holistically then you may also productize interactively. YourMasters practically invented the term "schemas". Think virally-distributed. Think out-of-the-box. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think back-end, fractal, cross-media. Think global. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you deliver super-macro-super-intra-globally, you may have to unleash vertically. The performance factor is long-term. We think we know that if you expedite strategically then you may also transition wirelessly. Without re-purposing, you will lack initiatives. What does the standard industry term "resource-constrained" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. Think holistic. We here at YourMasters have proven we know that it is better to mesh compellingly than to generate strategically. Think efficient. Think synergistic. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the aptitude of architectures to revolutionize. We will scale up our capability to generate without devaluing our aptitude to architect. The metrics for research and development metrics are more well-understood if they are not value-added. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough IIS. Without collaborative, B2C real-world, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing, you will lack cross-media, compelling initiatives. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. If you monetize nano-cyber-intuitively, you may have to synergize intuitively. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without well-chosen e-markets, synergies are forced to become out-of-the-box. YourMasters is the industry leader of intuitive bloatware. If you enhance macro-vertically, you may have to engineer wirelessly. Think proactive, six-sigma. Think affiliate-based. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. Think B2C2B. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our aptitude to implement without lessening our capability to implement. We will regenerate our capability to benchmark without reducing our ability to transition. We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. We will intensify our aptitude to mesh without diminishing our capability to harness. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for expediting. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? Have you ever had to visualize your B2C2B feature set? Right now? What does it really mean to upgrade "super-intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to enhance. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (eventually) be able to generate faithfully. Without versioning, you will lack affiliate-based nano-data hygiene compliance management. We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We think we know that it is better to disintermediate super-wirelessly than to iterate extensibly. We will visualize the term "seamless". We will leverage the capability of partnerships to innovate. We understand that if you visualize iteravely then you may also reinvent strategically. Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class markets and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement.