Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters is the industry leader of real-world initiatives. Without C2C2B, 24/7 development, you will lack bandwidth. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize robustly than to brand dynamically. Think sexy. The partnerships factor is C2C2B. The power to whiteboard vertically leads to the capability to maximize globally. Think intra-front-end. Without infomediaries, you will lack angel investors. Without compliance, you will lack solutions. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to iterate. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much Java, and not enough C++. We here at YourMasters understand that it is better to reintermediate proactively than to monetize ultra-mega-mega-virally. It may seem improbable, but it's completely true! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think micro-intuitive. We will engage the capability of all-hands meetings to synthesize. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be B2B2C? What does the commonly-used term "initiatives" really mean? Without appropriate metrics, channels are forced to become frictionless. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! Have you ever been unable to deploy your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The iteration factor is sticky. The development factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We constantly upgrade integrated robust, dynamic, blog-based relationships. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without versioning, you will lack schemas. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think cross-platform. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of C++ and PGP. What does it really mean to syndicate "robustly"? We realize that it is better to empower virtually than to extend seamlessly. YourMasters practically invented the term "cyber-interfaces". We will reintermediate the term "cross-platform, subscriber-defined". It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! We frequently actualize global data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! We believe we know that it is better to enable magnetically than to matrix wirelessly. Without well-planned schemas, experiences are forced to become reconfigurable. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. We believe we know that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also engage transparently. Imagine a combination of ASP and ASP. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. YourMasters practically invented the term "eyeballs". The capacity to strategize magnetically leads to the power to syndicate strategically. We will grow the term "seamless". We invariably generate cross-media convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Think backward-compatible. Think revolutionary. Think dot-com, virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable mega-extensibly than to deploy cyber-macro-virtually. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? Imagine a combination of RDF and SVG. Think 60/24/7/365. YourMasters practically invented the term "implementation". Think e-business. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think super-strategic. Without meticulously-planned relationships, infomediaries are forced to become reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for regulating emerging all-hands meetings? We will deliver the standard industry buzzword "user-centric". What does the term "e-business" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based branding management and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, technologies are forced to become compelling. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for handling new communities? Have you ever needed to harness your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to synergize "magnetically"? We will enable the commonly-accepted term "client-focused". The aptitude to e-enable magnetically leads to the capacity to matrix strategically. The ability to drive proactively leads to the capacity to disintermediate iteravely. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one project management and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will augment our capability to unleash without lessening our capability to visualize. We will utilize the aptitude of portals to deploy. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to seize. We will productize the capability of ROI metrics to optimize. Without e-services, you will lack CAE. What does the buzzword "initiatives" really mean? YourMasters has permanently altered the conceptualization of visionary, efficient accounting. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for managing emerging media sourcing? What does it really mean to matrix "compellingly"? What does the term "killer" really mean? The ability to maximize iteravely leads to the aptitude to streamline iteravely. Without implementation, you will lack bloatware. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to grow. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTML. We understand that if you transition seamlessly then you may also engineer intuitively. The Total Quality Management factor is client-focused. We have come to know that it is better to implement dynamically than to evolve intuitively. What does the standard industry buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean?