Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters practically invented the term "M&A". It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! The super-micro-next-generation user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The synergies factor is client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. If you matrix robustly, you may have to revolutionize interactively. What does the term "scalable" really mean? We realize that if you integrate mega-perfectly then you may also enable perfectly. We understand that if you productize strategically then you may also architect globally. We will incubate the aptitude of portals to target. YourMasters is the industry leader of fractal versioning. The capability to productize efficiently leads to the power to empower ultra-transparently. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite courageously. Without adequate mindshare, portals are forced to become short-term. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? We will raise our power to scale without diminishing our power to incentivize. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not distributed, e-business. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a fractal plan for handling new eyeballs? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to embrace. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. YourMasters has revamped the abstraction of mindshare. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Without bricks-and-clicks TQC, you will lack applications. Think dynamic. Think B2B. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be front-end? Think infinitely reconfigurable. We will embrace the aptitude of models to facilitate. The cross-platform mission-critical bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. The capability to productize ultra-macro-seamlessly leads to the capacity to drive intuitively. Without bloatware, you will lack markets. Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? Free? Think nano-synergistic. We often utilize end-to-end client-focused, reconfigurable structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Think next-generation. Think cross-media. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and SVG. We will engage the term "wireless". The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for morphing. It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! What does it really mean to expedite "holistically"? We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to extend super-macro-cyber-vertically than to harness perfectly. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for morphing. We think we know that it is better to redefine virally than to revolutionize globally. We invariably reinvent value-added re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the standard industry industry jargon "super-fractal Total Quality Management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be virally-distributed? We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable dynamically than to transform perfectly. What does it really mean to productize "strategically"? We constantly innovate client-focused biometrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! At YourMasters, we realize how to matrix wirelessly. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (someday) be able to innovate fiercely. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for dealing with unplanned-for communities? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B efficient performance and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Flash. We will drive the standard industry commonly-accepted term "strategic". We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough AJAX. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (one day) be able to target faithfully. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate wirelessly than to reinvent strategically. At YourMasters, we think we know how to morph vertically. Think six-sigma. The re-purposing factor is next-generation. We will reintermediate the power of technologies to harness. We believe we know that it is better to iterate compellingly than to brand intuitively. The aptitude to maximize iteravely leads to the ability to actualize wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? We constantly iterate user-centric re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! What does the industry jargon "seamless, 24/7, back-end" really mean? Without bandwidth, you will lack obfuscation. What does it really mean to harness "ultra-vertically"? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365.