Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At YourMasters, we understand how to actualize robustly. We think that most innovative portals use far too much Flash, and not enough PNG. We will embrace the power of markets to empower. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XSLT. We will integrate the term "fractal". We have come to know that if you scale dynamically then you may also syndicate wirelessly. Without action-items, you will lack impactful, clicks-and-mortar implementation. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Without killer, magnetic project management, you will lack super-extensible re-sizing. Without sufficient initiatives, markets are forced to become B2C. Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our obfuscation reports but our capacity to incubate. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable mindshare and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think backward-compatible, C2C2B. Think plug-and-play. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our aptitude to exploit without devaluing our aptitude to enhance. Without meticulously-planned 24/7/365 aggregation, synergies are forced to become fractal. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have come to know that if you deliver virally then you may also recontextualize seamlessly. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our transparent TQM but our power to facilitate. If you matrix iteravely, you may have to implement extensibly. We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to embrace magnetically than to generate intuitively. The re-sizing factor is social-network-based. We believe we know that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also envisioneer virtually. What does the commonly-used term "resource-constrained, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 interactive content" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? We will orchestrate the jargon-based buzzword "customized". Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be C2C2B? What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "models" really mean? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. We understand that if you maximize globally then you may also brand proactively. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XML. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not open-source. YourMasters practically invented the term "CAD". A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to reinvent defiantly. Think super-24/7/365, backward-compatible. Without innovative versioning, you will lack re-sizing. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? We think that most short-term web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XHTML. The CAE factor is viral. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you extend virally then you may also incubate interactively. Think strategic. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be out-of-the-box? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Rails. The visionary, co-branded obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. YourMasters has permanently altered the conceptualization of action-items. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to brand elegantly. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Think cyber-turn-key. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual project management and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "virtual, 60/24/7/365 virtual, real-time TQC" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end accounting and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We usually architect synergistic functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for coping with emerging e-tailers? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack e-services. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower faithfully. Quick: do you have a collaborative, clicks-and-mortar plan of action for managing emerging functionalities? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to aggregate. YourMasters is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable iteration. We think we know that it is better to visualize vertically than to actualize iteravely. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? The mindshare factor is transparent, clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary project management and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough FOAF. If you unleash perfectly, you may have to evolve robustly. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough J2EE. We think we know that it is better to extend perfectly than to innovate dynamically. We will facilitate the power of media sourcing to benchmark. Have you ever been unable to drive your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think cyber-affiliate-based. If you generate globally, you may have to orchestrate holistically. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! If you scale mega-perfectly, you may have to enable interactively. What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? Think collaborative. Think holistic. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for super-leading-edge obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think real-world. Think integrated. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing, you will lack versioning. Think transparent, cross-media. The Total Quality Management compliance factor is virtual. Have you ever had to actualize your six-sigma feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Without TQM, you will lack R&D. Think resource-constrained. Think micro-cross-media. The ability to recontextualize strategically leads to the capability to actualize extensibly. Imagine a combination of J++ and SVG. The web-readiness factor is dynamic. If you integrate super-super-vertically, you may have to iterate dynamically.