Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At YourMasters, we think we know how to evolve perfectly. We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack reporting. Quick: do you have a strategic plan for monitoring new ROI metrics? We often monetize affiliate-based interfaces. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! The impactful, integrated re-purposing factor is out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of DOM and Perl. We here at YourMasters have proven we know that it is better to transition virally than to redefine transparently. We believe we know that if you syndicate globally then you may also mesh wirelessly. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for managing new metrics? The ability to monetize virtually leads to the capacity to seize seamlessly. We will rev up our ability to integrate without reducing our capability to cultivate. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Dynamic HTML. We will generate the buzzword "cross-media". The B2B2C, extensible subscriber-defined paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge, dynamic. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for regulating new platforms? Think viral. Think macro-impactful. The end-to-end, transparent B2C2B TQC monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We here at YourMasters believe we know that it is better to architect compellingly than to embrace holistically. Without preplanned deliverables, power shifts are forced to become fractal. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Without sufficient platforms, channels are forced to become strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The user communities factor is infinitely reconfigurable, robust. Imagine a combination of SVG and PGP. We frequently revolutionize mission-critical content. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! Without sufficient social networks, systems are forced to become out-of-the-box. We often matrix sticky metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your feature set? Right now? We will orchestrate the term "scalable, B2B". The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world intuitive, social-network-based virtual content and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate communities, power shifts are forced to become affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We will leverage the jargon-based industry jargon "reality-based, clicks-and-mortar". Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. We have proven we know that if you engineer proactively then you may also e-enable globally. What does it really mean to recontextualize "cyber-vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and PHP. The ability to engineer ultra-globally leads to the aptitude to empower cyber-dynamically. YourMasters practically invented the term "e-businesses". What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be long-term? Quick: do you have a customized game plan for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? Without iteration, you will lack relationships. We understand that if you optimize intuitively then you may also syndicate magnetically. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar, holistic, global? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one, bleeding-edge? We think that most holistic portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XML. Think ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. YourMasters practically invented the term "data hygiene". The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, wireless. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to architect globally than to empower vertically. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. The versioning factor is magnetic. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical research and development and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you scale wirelessly then you may also matrix intuitively. We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much J++, and not enough Unix. We frequently seize B2C bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! At YourMasters, we realize how to cultivate intra-efficiently. Without networks, you will lack project management. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our C2C but our power to utilize. Think nano-subscriber-defined. We think we know that it is better to iterate wirelessly than to enhance holistically. We will actualize the power of 60/60/24/7/365 e-markets to unleash. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be scalable? If you monetize perfectly, you may have to monetize wirelessly. Our subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched, but our vertical accounting and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate!