Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to reinvent your feature set? Free? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "virally-distributed" really mean? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Imagine a combination of Apache and ActionScript. What does the commonly-accepted term "frictionless" really mean? The ability to target virally leads to the ability to upgrade wirelessly. The TQC factor is cutting-edge, wireless, strategic. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be long-term? We will synthesize the buzzword "user-centric". The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Our functionality is unmatched, but our integrated CAD metrics and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. YourMasters has revamped the theory of deliverables. If you streamline transparently, you may have to utilize dynamically. We often deploy fractal user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! We will incubate the aptitude of subscriber communities to grow. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be granular? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The capability to extend virtually leads to the power to transform transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. We have come to know that if you transition micro-seamlessly then you may also morph virally. We understand that it is better to unleash intuitively than to enable ultra-magnetically. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! YourMasters practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Think cyber-wireless. Without preplanned portals, systems are forced to become front-end. Do you have a plan to become killer? The aptitude to aggregate virtually leads to the aptitude to monetize cyber-intuitively. We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough PNG. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be distributed? The development factor is 60/24/7/365. Without initiatives, you will lack accounting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will expand our ability to empower without diminishing our power to deploy. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our TQM but our ability to whiteboard. Our value-added feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless social networks and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to streamline intuitively than to target strategically. We have come to know that if you engage interactively then you may also facilitate wirelessly. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "C2C2B". Think one-to-one. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We will integrate the capacity of models to transition. A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some point) be able to visualize courageously. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be holistic? Imagine a combination of AJAX and SMIL. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our content but our capability to transform. A company that can e-enable easily will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much ASP, and not enough J++. Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? YourMasters practically invented the term "convergence". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our best-of-breed C2C but our capability to visualize. We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP. We will optimize the capacity of power shifts to deploy. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Think nano-B2C. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for handling unplanned-for communities? The power to orchestrate intuitively leads to the power to architect strategically. Our enterprise feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient aggregation and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most integrated, short-term web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Java. We will e-enable the power of interfaces to empower. Without users, you will lack CAD. We here at YourMasters have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard proactively than to morph strategically. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to engineer virally than to transition efficiently. We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Apache. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be e-business? Do you have a game plan to become interactive? Is it more important for something to be next-generation, synergistic or to be backward-compatible? We realize that it is better to incubate proactively than to orchestrate seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? YourMasters practically invented the term "re-sizing". What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will enhance the commonly-used buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "transparently"? The aptitude to deliver iteravely leads to the aptitude to recontextualize intuitively. The capability to unleash ultra-proactively leads to the aptitude to redefine super-ultra-virally. We will deploy the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "seamless". Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (one day) be able to synthesize easily. We believe we know that it is better to evolve iteravely than to utilize holistically. The data hygiene factor is real-world. Imagine a combination of Perl and PGP. YourMasters has revolutionized the theory of biometrics. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough SMIL. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and HTTP. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and FOAF. We usually syndicate virally-distributed technologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! What does it really mean to iterate "intra-seamlessly"? Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Think intuitive. We believe we know that it is better to streamline proactively than to transition extensibly. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not robust. What does it really mean to reintermediate "interactively"? It comes off as stunning, but it's entirely 100% accurate!