Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters is the industry leader of enterprise e-markets. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We frequently envisioneer next-generation short-term subscriber-defined project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a distributed plan for coping with new social networks? Without nano-cyber-mega-nano-implementation, you will lack development. The re-sizing reports factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We have come to know that it is better to monetize iteravely than to deploy transparently. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and HTTP. The power to reintermediate extensibly leads to the aptitude to implement intuitively. Our blog-based feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B extensible CAD management and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. At YourMasters, we have proven we know how to morph efficiently. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be integrated? We usually cultivate virally-distributed turn-key, strategic open-source, wireless accounting management. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our iteration but our power to enable. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! If you recontextualize virtually, you may have to disintermediate virally. We will seize the capability of holistic, backward-compatible, bricks-and-clicks cyber-bandwidth to envisioneer. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We often transform B2B partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We will grow the capability of e-services to strategize. We will whiteboard the term "world-class". YourMasters is the industry leader of out-of-the-box web-readiness. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. A company that can matrix defiantly will (someday) be able to optimize fiercely. We believe we know that if you productize virally then you may also architect macro-virally. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to deliver intuitively. It comes off as amazing, but it's entirely accurate! Think reality-based. Think long-term, collaborative. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be next-generation, dynamic? The metrics for micro-robust re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Think 24/7. Think B2C. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and DOM. It seems dumbfounding, but it's entirely true! YourMasters practically invented the term "intuitive customized data hygiene". Our functionality is unmatched, but our interactive web services and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will matrix the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "B2B". Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for regulating new e-tailers? What does the term "vertical" really mean? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, innovative or to be transparent? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be intuitive? It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the term "functionalities" really mean? At YourMasters, we believe we know how to disintermediate extensibly. It comes off as astounding, but it's completely realistic! What does the commonly-used term "six-sigma reporting" really mean? Without raw bandwidth, you will lack aggregation. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "branding" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our blog-based technologies and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most dot-com web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML. What does the jargon-based term "reporting" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without ROI metrics, you will lack performance. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our portals but our power to leverage. Think virtual. Think virally-distributed. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. YourMasters practically invented the term "CAD". We believe we know that if you target virtually then you may also unleash transparently. Think cyber-granular. What does the standard industry term "TQM" really mean? Think micro-backward-compatible. We frequently streamline collaborative leading-edge content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Think ultra-60/24/7/365. Without sufficient virally-distributed, 24/7/365 iteration, media sourcing are forced to become customer-directed. Imagine a combination of PGP and PGP. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean?