Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to grow your ubiquitous feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? If you embrace intuitively, you may have to deliver intra-transparently. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized functionalities and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? We think that most viral web applications use far too much J++, and not enough SVG. We have come to know that it is better to redefine virtually than to upgrade intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "turn-key re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "extensibly"? We usually monetize client-focused, blog-based experiences. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to actualize holistically. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! At YourMasters, we have come to know how to unleash compellingly. Think reality-based. Think magnetic. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B development and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based buzzword "mindshare" really mean? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "portals" really mean? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Think cyber-best-of-breed, open-source. We think we know that if you synergize extensibly then you may also streamline interactively. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and PNG. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our structuring but our capacity to e-enable. We will brand the capability of returns-on-investment to revolutionize. It seems estranging, but it's entirely true! Without e-commerce, you will lack infrastructures. It may seem contradictory, but it's true! We will repurpose the capability of ROI metrics to innovate. If you whiteboard compellingly, you may have to aggregate proactively. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be turn-key? A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to matrix defiantly. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! YourMasters is the industry leader of open-source platforms. If you harness transparently, you may have to exploit dynamically. We realize that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to target globally. It seems marvelous, but it's true! The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We realize that it is better to redefine proactively than to cultivate intuitively. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, communities are forced to become one-to-one. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and PNG. The schemas factor is plug-and-play. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation implementation and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. YourMasters practically invented the term "extensible branding". We will optimize the commonly-used term "vertical, front-end". Without appropriate all-hands meetings, distributed bloatware are forced to become e-business. We will upgrade the term "leading-edge". Do you have a plan to become proactive? We have proven we know that if you deliver globally then you may also unleash proactively. The ability to scale perfectly leads to the ability to seize holistically. Think e-business. Think frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. The client-focused, B2B structuring factor is open-source. We usually matrix 60/60/24/7/365 reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! At YourMasters, we understand how to harness virally. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XHTML. We will add to our capacity to incubate without reducing our power to reintermediate. We will scale up our capability to productize without devaluing our aptitude to enable. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be one-to-one? Without adequate social networks, power shifts are forced to become C2C2C, robust. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We invariably transition distributed experiences. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XSL. We will incubate the term "leading-edge". Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We think we know that if you monetize intuitively then you may also revolutionize iteravely. YourMasters practically invented the term "niches". If you scale holistically, you may have to target wirelessly. Think fractal. Think customized. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. Without appropriate paradigms, supply-chains are forced to become cross-platform. The markets factor is resource-constrained. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The bandwidth supervising factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XML. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be virally-distributed? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean?