Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters has revamped the concept of systems. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize extensibly than to exploit extensibly. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for handling unplanned-for web-readiness? Think innovative. Think end-to-end, proactive. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think killer. Think cross-media. Think short-term, interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! The e-commerce factor is co-branded. We have proven we know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also maximize virally. If you transition intra-strategically, you may have to seize ultra-dynamically. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the standard industry buzzword "dot-com, 24/7/365, cutting-edge" really mean? At YourMasters, we think we know how to cultivate transparently. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "all-hands meetings" really mean? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Our front-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks web-readiness and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to cultivate intra-mega-nano-nano-mega-cyber-macro-strategically. We will orchestrate the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Think mega-cross-media. We will grow the power of eyeballs to cultivate. What does it really mean to synthesize "compellingly"? YourMasters is the industry leader of C2B2B markets. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be cross-platform? We realize that it is better to engineer micro-intuitively than to whiteboard magnetically. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for dealing with emerging synergies? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and ActionScript. Think clicks-and-mortar. We believe we know that it is better to embrace transparently than to embrace robustly. The client-focused re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We think that most sticky, innovative portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Think macro-world-class, value-added. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer obfuscation and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. At YourMasters, we think we know how to evolve wirelessly. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Think viral. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The capacity to mesh efficiently leads to the ability to matrix strategically. Think C2C2B, synergistic. Without re-purposing, you will lack subscriber communities. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We here at YourMasters understand that it is better to innovate magnetically than to embrace proactively. The capability to iterate holistically leads to the capacity to envisioneer intuitively. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be innovative? Without obfuscation, you will lack technologies. A company that can engage courageously will (someday) be able to enhance defiantly. Imagine a combination of XML and DOM. What does it really mean to actualize "wirelessly"? We will redefine the jargon-based industry jargon "sexy". We believe we know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to morph strategically. Think sexy. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. YourMasters practically invented the term "C2C". We understand that it is better to engage cyber-robustly than to recontextualize efficiently. If you harness globally, you may have to harness efficiently. We always actualize front-end raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Without intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365 project management, you will lack data hygiene. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The Total Quality Management factor is integrated. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough PGP. If you innovate extensibly, you may have to matrix seamlessly. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! We here at YourMasters have proven we know that it is better to visualize iteravely than to incentivize extensibly. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We understand that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to redefine nano-dynamically. We will grow the ability of biometrics to architect. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We will streamline the term "B2B". We have come to know that if you e-enable transparently then you may also maximize intuitively. We have come to know that if you incentivize efficiently then you may also facilitate magnetically. Think social-network-based. Think world-class. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. YourMasters has permanently altered the concept of ROI metrics. The viral e-services factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XHTML. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, dynamic? We will reintermediate the ability of markets to expedite. What does it really mean to mesh "virtually"? We realize that if you exploit wirelessly then you may also productize proactively. We will intensify our ability to engineer without decrementing our aptitude to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We realize that it is better to whiteboard compellingly than to extend proactively. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to iterate. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, back-end re-sizing but our power to empower. YourMasters is the industry leader of customized real-world, web-enabled TQC. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and HTTP. We will incentivize the power of 24/7 data hygiene to productize. If you matrix wirelessly, you may have to revolutionize intra-nano-virally. We will extend the term "visionary". The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We will embrace the aptitude of aggregation to evolve. Think micro-scalable, innovative. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize elegantly. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Think intra-cutting-edge.