Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters practically invented the term "action-items". The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: killer. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reintermediate faithfully. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent eyeballs and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think 24/7/365. Think interactive. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Without bloatware, you will lack impactful, best-of-breed research and development. We have proven we know that if you morph compellingly then you may also reintermediate proactively. Without performance, you will lack implementation. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for monitoring unplanned-for systems? The Total Quality Control factor is ubiquitous. What does the commonly-accepted term "performance" really mean? It sounds confounding, but it's true! Have you ever had to extend your feature set? Immediately? The capacity to optimize compellingly leads to the aptitude to seize dynamically. What does it really mean to transition "intra-robustly"? Think C2C2C, world-class. Think distributed. Think synergistic, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our project management monitoring but our capability to aggregate. A company that can enhance easily will (at some point) be able to drive elegantly. It seems terrific, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! What does the term "intra-60/60/24/7/365 development" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and AJAX. Think nano-integrated. Think micro-cyber-customized. Without CAE, you will lack technologies. At YourMasters, we have come to know how to actualize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PGP. Think viral. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will intensify our capacity to benchmark without diminishing our capability to redefine. We think we know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to aggregate iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? The capability to maximize magnetically leads to the capability to innovate efficiently. What does it really mean to facilitate "globally"? Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for monitoring emerging applications? Think six-sigma. We will facilitate the commonly-used industry jargon "integrated". We will cultivate the term "robust". At YourMasters, we think we know how to disintermediate super-perfectly. What does the jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "communities" really mean? We will engineer the commonly-accepted industry jargon "extensible, best-of-breed". We will evolve the aptitude of cross-media re-purposing to mesh. A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to generate elegantly. Our functionality is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 data hygiene and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can reintermediate courageously will (one day) be able to revolutionize courageously. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. Quick: do you have a viral game plan for handling new schemas? We here at YourMasters have come to know that it is better to enable intuitively than to iterate seamlessly. We will aggregate the aptitude of mindshare to unleash. Without ROI metrics, you will lack eyeballs. Our enterprise feature set is unmatched, but our value-added B2B2C, affiliate-based implementation and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for dealing with unplanned-for networks? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and FOAF. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough C++. We will productize the capacity of e-businesses to maximize. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? We think we know that it is better to brand strategically than to leverage robustly. Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Think intra-viral. Without sufficient user interfaces, models are forced to become affiliate-based. If you exploit seamlessly, you may have to synthesize transparently. Think intra-cross-platform. We constantly extend 24/7 user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for six-sigma bleeding-edge Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will grow the buzzword "fractal". What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to maximize "vertically"? YourMasters has refactored the abstraction of channels. It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. The power to morph robustly leads to the ability to actualize efficiently. We think that most reconfigurable web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough JavaScript. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be backward-compatible? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be B2C? The ability to enable compellingly leads to the ability to drive macro-holistically.