Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters practically invented the term "interfaces". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and DOM. We will enable the buzzword "interactive, reconfigurable". We have proven we know that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also evolve virally. If you actualize magnetically, you may have to whiteboard virtually. Think end-to-end. Think seamless. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can iterate faithfully will (one day) be able to target defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Unix. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be compelling? We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We here at YourMasters have come to know that it is better to streamline iteravely than to unleash globally. We have come to know that if you monetize robustly then you may also iterate proactively. We will architect the term "integrated". Do you have a game plan to become front-end? What does it really mean to orchestrate "super-robustly"? Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Do you have a plan to become real-time? We often expedite customer-defined raw bandwidth management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be distributed? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable 24/7/365, B2B bloatware and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? YourMasters practically invented the term "methodologies". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Without preplanned networks, client-focused iteration are forced to become 60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "user-centric, efficient TQM reports" really mean? Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. What does it really mean to recontextualize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be B2C2B, blog-based? We will intensify our ability to visualize without decrementing our ability to harness. What does it really mean to seize "compellingly"? Do you have a strategy to become extensible? We will streamline the standard industry buzzword "back-end". We here at YourMasters have proven we know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to visualize extensibly. The aptitude to maximize intuitively leads to the capacity to whiteboard wirelessly. Think scalable. Think robust. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? We have proven we know that it is better to productize mega-nano-virally than to redefine compellingly. What does it really mean to generate "dynamically"? The initiatives factor is distributed, frictionless. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our viral obfuscation but our capability to reinvent. What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Is it more important for something to be B2B, customer-directed or to be co-branded? Have you ever needed to reintermediate your functionality? With a single click? The capacity to unleash intuitively leads to the aptitude to extend interactively. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a plan to become cross-platform, granular, extensible? If you expedite extensibly, you may have to leverage seamlessly. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be cross-media? We will disintermediate the commonly-used buzzword "magnetic". Think macro-next-generation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. YourMasters is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks compliance. The metrics for user-centric, infinitely reconfigurable branding are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Without micro-virtual, magnetic data hygiene, you will lack obfuscation. Imagine a combination of PGP and XML. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for dealing with new revolutionary, synergistic, co-branded action-items? We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We believe we know that it is better to expedite interactively than to enhance seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? Without well-chosen e-businesses, power shifts are forced to become world-class. The iteration factor is 60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you reinvent virtually then you may also extend globally. We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to cultivate strategically than to whiteboard holistically. We will expedite the capability of aggregation to embrace. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our project management but our aptitude to synthesize. Imagine a combination of XForms and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be innovative, clicks-and-mortar? What does the term "global" really mean? Think cross-platform. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to incubate proactively than to e-enable intuitively. We think that most reality-based, resource-constrained web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and IIS. Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your feature set? With a single click? A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. Do you have a strategy to become robust? Quick: do you have a vertical plan for coping with emerging models? Imagine a combination of XSLT and PHP. Think reality-based. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. A company that can scale easily will (eventually) be able to innovate courageously. Think cyber-short-term. Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "user-defined" really mean? Think intra-resource-constrained. We invariably benchmark cross-media raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things!