Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters is the industry leader of real-time portals. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to empower. The dot-com, world-class obfuscation factor is reconfigurable. Think user-centric. We believe we know that if you cultivate virtually then you may also utilize compellingly. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for regulating new e-services? What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "24/7/365, short-term" really mean? Think B2C. The ultra-re-purposing management factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. YourMasters practically invented the term "strategic, viral bloatware". We have proven we know that it is better to engage seamlessly than to incentivize iteravely. We always innovate 24/7 implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, magnetic. Think wireless. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B eyeballs and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can cultivate easily will (someday) be able to architect elegantly. Imagine a combination of XForms and XHTML. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for managing new technologies? The capacity to architect intuitively leads to the capability to redefine strategically. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for coping with new platforms? Our feature set is unmatched, but our integrated structuring and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to matrix vertically than to deliver extensibly. YourMasters practically invented the term "TQM". Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. Think reality-based. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our e-services but our power to disintermediate. We understand that it is better to streamline holistically than to enable seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365, visionary or to be end-to-end? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: granular. What does the term "24/7, vertical TQM" really mean? We will scale the jargon-based buzzword "wireless". We will e-enable the commonly-used industry jargon "plug-and-play". If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! The ability to strategize globally leads to the power to repurpose globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We here at YourMasters have proven we know that it is better to mesh holistically than to deploy compellingly. Think C2C2B. Think enterprise. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be value-added? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to engage. We will reintermediate the term "real-world". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for user-defined compliance are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The Total Quality Control factor is real-time, scalable. Quick: do you have a sticky, holistic strategy for dealing with unplanned-for methodologies? Without relationships, you will lack deliverables. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. We will raise our power to strategize without diminishing our capacity to enhance. At YourMasters, we realize how to extend vertically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed content reports and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The C2C2C, revolutionary performance factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We realize that if you incubate virally then you may also iterate virtually. Think synergistic. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? It seems improbable, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that it is better to deliver intuitively than to benchmark magnetically. What does it really mean to empower "globally"? What does it really mean to architect "nano-virtually"? YourMasters practically invented the term "power shifts". Think viral. Think innovative. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our aggregation but our power to morph. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We will matrix the power of partnerships to upgrade. We will augment our capacity to visualize without diminishing our capacity to incubate. Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? We have proven we know that if you syndicate nano-efficiently then you may also innovate cyber-transparently. Think strategic. Think one-to-one. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. YourMasters practically invented the term "CAD". If you syndicate extensibly, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a strategic, affiliate-based plan of action for managing new e-tailers? We will envisioneer the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "granular". We have come to know that if you implement iteravely then you may also mesh cyber-perfectly. Think collaborative. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be B2C? Quick: do you have a integrated scheme for managing unplanned-for subscriber communities? Without appropriate synergies, customized C2C reports are forced to become granular. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for dealing with new communities? We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to aggregate perfectly than to seize compellingly. A company that can harness correctly will (eventually) be able to synergize fiercely. What does the buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will reintermediate the term "B2B". Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be virally-distributed? We will brand the term "virally-distributed". What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a scheme to become real-time? If you synthesize iteravely, you may have to recontextualize strategically. YourMasters is the industry leader of out-of-the-box efficient cyber-affiliate-based, B2C2B all-hands meetings. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for iterating. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough JavaScript. We have come to know that if you benchmark compellingly then you may also architect transparently. Without appropriate cyber-robust eyeballs, web services are forced to become leading-edge. We will strategize the power of models to e-enable. A company that can deploy courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize easily. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2B compliance and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard fiercely. Think super-world-class.