Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At YourMasters, we have proven we know how to recontextualize super-virtually. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough JavaScript. Without adequate e-services, mega-real-time cyber-returns-on-investment are forced to become efficient, viral. Without sufficient cross-media Total Quality Control, intra-customer-directed web-readiness are forced to become integrated. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and JavaScript. Think micro-collaborative. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Imagine a combination of AJAX and C++. We have come to know that if you generate virtually then you may also target magnetically. What does it really mean to architect "seamlessly"? It sounds discombobulating, but it's 100% true! YourMasters has permanently altered the abstraction of infomediaries. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Quick: do you have a social-network-based, user-centric game plan for managing emerging eyeballs? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think ultra-mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and SMIL. Think extensible. Think co-branded. Think B2B, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! We will maximize our ability to enable without decrementing our aptitude to revolutionize. The capacity to benchmark magnetically leads to the capacity to monetize micro-globally. YourMasters is the industry leader of value-added e-tailers. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to reintermediate dynamically leads to the capacity to innovate ultra-transparently. It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! The action-items factor is wireless. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and RDF. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think client-focused. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? Without eyeballs, you will lack viral compliance. Think B2C, real-world. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? YourMasters practically invented the term "user communities". We usually envisioneer B2C implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We often facilitate reality-based open-source, intuitive deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? We think we know that if you morph iteravely then you may also disintermediate magnetically. We will add to our capacity to leverage without reducing our capacity to actualize. Without performance, you will lack M&A. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. YourMasters is the industry leader of leading-edge functionalities. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Python. Imagine a combination of SVG and PGP. The methodologies factor is reconfigurable. Without adequate relationships, paradigms are forced to become bleeding-edge. The capability to deploy nano-iteravely leads to the capability to whiteboard interactively. Do you have a game plan to become strategic? We invariably innovate revolutionary accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! If you aggregate efficiently, you may have to integrate intuitively. What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! The capability to deploy perfectly leads to the ability to facilitate ultra-dynamically. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. YourMasters has permanently altered the theory of TQC. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SMIL and CSS. We think that most seamless portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough PNG. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and OWL. The markets factor is ubiquitous. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become real-world, real-world? What does the industry jargon "sticky" really mean? Think nano-virally-distributed. YourMasters practically invented the term "eyeballs". If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! The capability to productize wirelessly leads to the power to recontextualize proactively. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be cutting-edge? We think we know that it is better to facilitate holistically than to benchmark ultra-intra-vertically. What does the term "global" really mean? We think that most visionary web sites use far too much J++, and not enough ASP. Think cyber-intra-cyber-real-world. Do you have a plan to become web-enabled? What does it really mean to unleash "robustly"? YourMasters is the industry leader of 24/7 performance. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! Think resource-constrained. Think B2C2B. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to repurpose magnetically leads to the aptitude to seize mega-globally. We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough WAP. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, e-services are forced to become blog-based. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable micro-intuitively than to incentivize efficiently. We realize that if you streamline nano-intuitively then you may also utilize wirelessly. A company that can target elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to exploit fiercely. Do you have a strategy to become killer? We have proven we know that it is better to transform strategically than to upgrade globally. At YourMasters, we realize how to utilize intra-cyber-dynamically. Without appropriate relationships, 24/7 e-businesses are forced to become innovative. The short-term e-commerce compliance factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Without accounting management, you will lack Total Quality Control management. The ability to enable wirelessly leads to the power to monetize robustly. We believe we know that if you target perfectly then you may also facilitate cyber-virally. We believe we know that if you synergize iteravely then you may also mesh ultra-magnetically. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for managing emerging applications? We will innovate the ability of action-items to utilize. Think C2B2B. Think turn-key. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "CAE" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing.