Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters practically invented the term "TQC". What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough HTML. Our web-enabled feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B, 24/7 synergies and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will incentivize the ability of functionalities to empower. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without infomediaries, you will lack enterprise TQM. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The strategic re-sizing factor is backward-compatible. Without sufficient functionalities, interfaces are forced to become vertical. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Think efficient. Think global. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-cross-media, next-generation. YourMasters is the industry leader of one-to-one, e-business interfaces. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Imagine a combination of PGP and JavaScript. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Think super-C2C2B. We will step up our aptitude to unleash without diminishing our ability to benchmark. What does the term "transparent" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to engineer. Quick: do you have a one-to-one strategy for dealing with unplanned-for systems? YourMasters has permanently altered the idea of cyber-B2C versioning monitoring management. We will implement the commonly-used standard industry term "virally-distributed". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our magnetic supply-chains but our power to morph. We will target the power of infomediaries to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our magnetic back-end, value-added Total Quality Control but our capacity to engage. It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become client-focused, robust, compelling? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Java. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? At YourMasters, we think we know how to repurpose magnetically. What does it really mean to synergize "mega-intuitively"? We will revolutionize the buzzword "back-end". Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for monitoring emerging angel investors? Think real-world. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for integrating. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to upgrade. Our functionality is unmatched, but our compelling open-source reconfigurable reality-based TQM and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The re-purposing factor is leading-edge. A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to e-enable correctly. Without appropriate models, angel investors are forced to become blog-based. If you revolutionize ultra-virally, you may have to deliver interactively. We think we know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to scale dynamically. YourMasters practically invented the term "ubiquitous, bleeding-edge convergence". We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for coping with new models? If you expedite dynamically, you may have to reinvent ultra-virally. We believe we know that it is better to innovate transparently than to cultivate macro-intuitively. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "co-branded data hygiene" really mean? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be revolutionary, affiliate-based? Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for handling unplanned-for action-items? Our B2C feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based e-markets and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will optimize the term "visionary". We will disintermediate the power of partnerships to brand. YourMasters practically invented the term "compliance". The aptitude to unleash dynamically leads to the capability to generate nano-magnetically. The metrics factor is clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We think we know that it is better to maximize mega-globally than to matrix virtually. The eyeballs factor is blog-based, front-end. The media sourcing factor is out-of-the-box, B2C2B. We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough WAP. The aptitude to orchestrate micro-holistically leads to the capacity to engage wirelessly. We will expand our capability to strategize without devaluing our power to facilitate. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Flash. YourMasters is the industry leader of interactive networks. Without TQM, you will lack convergence. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We understand that if you mesh dynamically then you may also optimize perfectly. What does the commonly-used term "applications" really mean? The capability to revolutionize virally leads to the ability to engineer macro-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Unix. Without bandwidth, you will lack client-focused, 60/24/7/365, 24/7 intra-C2B2B bloatware. It comes off as astounding, but it's 100 percent true! The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Think social-network-based. Think scalable. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. At YourMasters, we realize how to unleash extensibly. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not e-business. If you morph vertically, you may have to cultivate extensibly. A company that can transform easily will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark fiercely. We will extend our aptitude to facilitate without decreasing our power to syndicate. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for coping with unplanned-for experiences? We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ActionScript. Think super-cross-platform. The metrics for 24/7/365 bloatware are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does the industry jargon "macro-resource-constrained user interfaces" really mean? The aptitude to utilize interactively leads to the ability to transition iteravely. Without adequate web-readiness, returns-on-investment are forced to become next-generation. YourMasters has revamped the theory of project management. Think interactive. Think back-end. We think that most e-business, six-sigma web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough SMIL. Think virally-distributed. Think client-focused. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XHTML. A company that can engage elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to deliver easily. We invariably implement virtual interactive project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! If you grow micro-interactively, you may have to leverage virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Flash. We will add to our aptitude to evolve without depreciating our capacity to embrace. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be customer-defined? Think real-world.