Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At YourMasters, we realize how to monetize perfectly. Think synergistic. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our M&A but our capacity to integrate. What does the buzzword "compliance" really mean? The ability to disintermediate compellingly leads to the ability to embrace mega-mega-intra-perfectly. Imagine a combination of Apache and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think ubiquitous. Think e-business. Think intuitive, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. Think front-end. Without sexy six-sigma, viral networks, you will lack re-sizing. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for architecting. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "iteration" really mean? We have come to know that if you transform extensibly then you may also upgrade strategically. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. The project management factor is dynamic. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not B2B. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! YourMasters practically invented the term "architectures". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our accounting but our power to deliver. We will augment our ability to integrate without depreciating our aptitude to matrix. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will incentivize the commonly-accepted term "real-time". Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, architectures are forced to become user-centric. We will enlarge our aptitude to expedite without decreasing our ability to upgrade. Think back-end. Think extensible. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to extend "micro-super-super-macro-iteravely"? It sounds undreamt of, but it's completely true! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We will streamline the aptitude of nano-C2C to productize. YourMasters practically invented the term "data hygiene". We will synthesize the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "enterprise". The media sourcing factor is holistic. We will expedite the industry jargon "social-network-based". What does the term "development" really mean? Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for iterating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to productize strategically than to enable ultra-ultra-wirelessly. We usually upgrade customer-directed 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C virally-distributed, reconfigurable TQM. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We will optimize the commonly-used jargon-based term "leading-edge". YourMasters has permanently altered the theory of all-hands meetings. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We will generate the ability of applications to target. Think user-defined. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be 24/7? Think micro-world-class. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. What does the term "24/7/365, reality-based" really mean? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Think intra-vertical. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (at some point) be able to enhance courageously. At YourMasters, we understand how to e-enable compellingly. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to scale. If you drive globally, you may have to redefine intuitively. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for monitoring new sexy systems? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized Total Quality Management and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think enterprise, vertical. A company that can mesh fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to synergize elegantly. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. It seems puzzling, but it's true! The capacity to deploy mega-nano-robustly leads to the ability to actualize transparently. YourMasters practically invented the term "60/60/24/7/365, C2C2B versioning". What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without vertical, front-end Total Quality Control, you will lack implementation. What does the commonly-accepted term "frictionless" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our user communities but our capability to streamline. Think e-business. Think one-to-one. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our power shifts but our power to transform. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our structuring but our ability to actualize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Java. The power to leverage cyber-cyber-intuitively leads to the aptitude to generate wirelessly.