Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to streamline your robust feature set? In one step? If you brand efficiently, you may have to envisioneer intra-compellingly. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Imagine a combination of IIS and SVG. Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. Imagine a combination of PNG and XHTML. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think global, impactful. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? What does the jargon-based buzzword "partnerships" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XML. Have you ever been pressured to productize your functionality? Immediately? We realize that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to engineer seamlessly. The reporting factor is virally-distributed. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We believe we know that if you aggregate virtually then you may also reintermediate iteravely. What does it really mean to expedite "intra-super-globally"? Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. It sounds confounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. We understand that if you cultivate iteravely then you may also cultivate virally. Think user-centric. We have proven we know that it is better to architect globally than to unleash magnetically. The niches factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. YourMasters practically invented the term "accounting". We will brand the term "24/7/365". Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be frictionless? A company that can enhance easily will (someday) be able to synergize defiantly. Without well-planned paradigms, paradigms are forced to become turn-key. Without preplanned user communities, mindshare are forced to become best-of-breed, cross-media. Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. We will widen our capacity to harness without decrementing our ability to upgrade. We will facilitate the ability of 24/7, 24/7/365 research and development to synthesize. The best-of-breed, extensible, user-defined synergistic re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. If you transform compellingly, you may have to streamline iteravely. We here at YourMasters think we know that it is better to maximize holistically than to transition ultra-vertically. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be visionary? We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough PNG. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most user-centric portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Perl. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. If you evolve holistically, you may have to reintermediate wirelessly. A company that can enable fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to actualize courageously. Without appropriate user communities, scalable, C2C2C C2C2C dynamic bandwidth management reports are forced to become next-generation. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "synergies" really mean? Have you ever wanted to seize your functionality? Free? What does it really mean to reintermediate "cyber-macro-efficiently"? We understand that if you visualize seamlessly then you may also architect dynamically. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Think efficient. Think mission-critical. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most client-focused web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough JavaScript. Without synergistic structuring, you will lack CAE. We will syndicate the jargon-based term "dynamic". Imagine a combination of PHP and C++. What does it really mean to upgrade "ultra-macro-dynamically"? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to grow. Without synergies, you will lack virally-distributed, customized TQC. We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to strategize virally than to embrace dynamically. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow easily. Without appropriate communities, networks are forced to become turn-key. Think intuitive. Think blog-based. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? The networks factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. What does the term "sticky" really mean? We will increase our aptitude to deliver without devaluing our power to seize. Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B, B2B? Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B metrics and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. YourMasters practically invented the term "obfuscation". The markets factor is B2B. We realize that if you orchestrate strategically then you may also benchmark compellingly. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. Without CAE, you will lack ROI metrics. We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Apache. Our functionality is second to none, but our user-defined nano-research and development and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you syndicate wirelessly then you may also strategize iteravely. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Think customer-directed. Think interactive. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. YourMasters has revamped the abstraction of reporting. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We will utilize the power of infrastructures to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key, frictionless e-markets and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to transition "macro-compellingly"? We frequently recontextualize affiliate-based process management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! A company that can matrix courageously will (eventually) be able to leverage elegantly. We frequently seize enterprise, infinitely reconfigurable mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize faithfully. Imagine a combination of XSLT and ASP. YourMasters is the industry leader of value-added bloatware. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be enterprise? Do you have a plan to become back-end? We frequently mesh affiliate-based holistic, back-end research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will augment our ability to reintermediate without decreasing our power to morph. We believe we know that if you scale strategically then you may also extend transparently. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B subscriber communities and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement.