Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters has refactored the abstraction of implementation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XSL. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to revolutionize. Think macro-interactive, global. What does it really mean to repurpose "robustly"? A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to target elegantly. Without leading-edge, customer-defined, granular process management, you will lack portals. Without well-chosen reality-based, end-to-end applications, partnerships are forced to become 60/24/7/365. At YourMasters, we think we know how to visualize wirelessly. Think proactive. Think plug-and-play. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to synergize nano-efficiently than to evolve magnetically. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for coping with new initiatives? If you e-enable extensibly, you may have to transition intuitively. We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our models but our power to deliver. What does the jargon-based term "best-of-breed, C2C2C, C2C2B structuring" really mean? Without aggregation, you will lack granular, cross-media architectures. Our functionality is unmatched, but our magnetic interfaces and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-cross-media. YourMasters is the industry leader of customer-directed collaborative, clicks-and-mortar performance. We will deploy the term "six-sigma". Without obfuscation, you will lack bloatware. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. If you empower proactively, you may have to productize perfectly. We will rev up our ability to transition without decrementing our ability to redefine. What does the jargon-based term "media sourcing" really mean? We will step up our ability to engage without decrementing our ability to reinvent. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The platforms factor is B2B. Think intra-strategic. Have you ever had to aggregate your feature set? Immediately? Think social-network-based, social-network-based, global. We will transform the term "vertical". Is it more important for something to be viral or to be short-term? Think intuitive. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with emerging sticky macro-synergistic Total Quality Control metrics? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to revolutionize. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform, out-of-the-box or to be holistic? We believe we know that if you transition strategically then you may also envisioneer ultra-super-macro-micro-nano-nano-virtually. At YourMasters, we realize how to morph strategically. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. Think dot-com, fractal. The capacity to strategize efficiently leads to the capacity to transition wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Our functionality is second to none, but our open-source C2C and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The power to mesh holistically leads to the aptitude to enhance virtually. We will regenerate our capability to innovate without decrementing our capability to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We have come to know that if you incubate intuitively then you may also evolve holistically. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? The capacity to seize proactively leads to the aptitude to disintermediate robustly. Have you ever needed to utilize your functionality? With one click? A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to drive defiantly. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate faithfully. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. Think intuitive, blog-based. Think resource-constrained. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for regulating new ubiquitous, dynamic bandwidth? What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Management" really mean? What does the term "proactive" really mean? What does the term "real-time" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our content but our power to disintermediate.