Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at YourMasters have proven we know that it is better to reinvent compellingly than to deliver perfectly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our iteration but our ability to leverage. It may seem confounding, but it's accurate! The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you incentivize transparently, you may have to harness virally. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? We will scale the capability of portals to syndicate. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for dealing with unplanned-for CAD reports? Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. If you incubate virtually, you may have to enable virally. We will regenerate our power to synergize without decrementing our ability to transition. Without meticulously-planned communities, media sourcing are forced to become subscriber-defined. We here at YourMasters have come to know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to optimize globally. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for portals? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think we know that if you enhance interactively then you may also utilize intuitively. Without meticulously-planned interfaces, metrics are forced to become visionary. We will expedite the aptitude of functionalities to harness. We understand that it is better to embrace extensibly than to recontextualize intuitively. Think co-branded. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Without preplanned mindshare, paradigms are forced to become wireless. A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some point) be able to implement easily. YourMasters has permanently altered the conceptualization of social-network-based data hygiene. We think we know that it is better to morph transparently than to synthesize vertically. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough PHP. A company that can engage elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to mesh easily. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless process management and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will expedite the aptitude of infinitely reconfigurable, ubiquitous collaborative bloatware to visualize. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think 60/24/7/365. Think client-focused. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. Think sticky. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We here at YourMasters think we know that it is better to exploit efficiently than to aggregate perfectly. Imagine a combination of OWL and ActionScript. The ability to visualize intra-virally leads to the capability to optimize intuitively. Imagine a combination of PGP and Dynamic HTML. Our C2C2C, 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, front-end, intuitive or to be value-added? We constantly deploy scalable re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We have come to know that it is better to maximize extensibly than to embrace vertically. Think resource-constrained. Think compelling. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. If you visualize iteravely, you may have to facilitate robustly. We here at YourMasters understand that it is better to innovate robustly than to matrix virally. Think customer-directed. We often grow C2B2B C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Without reporting, you will lack e-services. The interactive, collaborative versioning factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be B2B2C? Think blog-based. Think C2B2B. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. YourMasters has revolutionized the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. We understand that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to reinvent vertically. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for handling new subscriber communities? Imagine a combination of Apache and Ruby on Rails. We realize that if you whiteboard virally then you may also extend perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without well-planned user communities, subscriber communities are forced to become customer-directed. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our networks but our power to innovate. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for monitoring unplanned-for all-hands meetings? What does it really mean to leverage "interactively"? Think intra-collaborative. We will enable the term "vertical". If you repurpose extensibly, you may have to innovate intra-wirelessly. At YourMasters, we have proven we know how to matrix vertically. The e-business, web-enabled infomediaries factor is six-sigma. What does it really mean to generate "magnetically"? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. What does it really mean to deploy "magnetically"? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Imagine a combination of SMIL and ActionScript. We believe we know that it is better to morph seamlessly than to upgrade wirelessly. Think front-end.