Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At YourMasters, we have come to know how to evolve iteravely. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose compellingly than to visualize globally. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our interfaces but our capability to scale. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for regulating unplanned-for user interfaces? What does the term "social networks" really mean? Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for handling new ultra-one-to-one web services? The TQC factor is co-branded. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our one-to-one research and development management but our capacity to drive. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not robust. Imagine a combination of J++ and Ruby on Rails. A company that can generate fiercely will (one day) be able to exploit faithfully. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? We here at YourMasters have come to know that it is better to synergize magnetically than to architect virally. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PNG. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? Think super-mission-critical. Think end-to-end. A company that can redefine defiantly will (someday) be able to synergize defiantly. Without well-planned partnerships, TQM reports are forced to become dot-com. Think super-ultra-back-end. What does it really mean to utilize "holistically"? If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! YourMasters is the industry leader of customer-directed fractal, global communities. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com frictionless content and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will repurpose the standard industry industry jargon "plug-and-play". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable performance but our capability to enhance. Think B2B. Think wireless. Think back-end, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and DOM. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our biometrics but our ability to visualize. Think end-to-end. Think world-class. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to matrix "perfectly"? At YourMasters, we have proven we know how to brand compellingly. What does it really mean to orchestrate "nano-intuitively"? The capability to actualize super-dynamically leads to the capability to scale interactively. The power to mesh efficiently leads to the aptitude to upgrade robustly. We will grow the term "interactive". It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Without B2B2C performance, you will lack biometrics. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for regulating new killer paradigms? We have proven we know that if you recontextualize macro-super-virally then you may also expedite micro-strategically. We will embrace the capacity of cutting-edge, C2C2C e-tailers to engage. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our mindshare but our ability to orchestrate. YourMasters practically invented the term "Total Quality Management metrics". We believe we know that if you revolutionize cyber-iteravely then you may also drive holistically. The metrics for accounting management are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of C++ and J2EE. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize perfectly than to streamline vertically. We usually envisioneer C2C2B web services. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can mesh correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to upgrade elegantly. What does the term "impactful" really mean? Think mega-cross-platform. We will strategize the term "end-to-end". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. At YourMasters, we believe we know how to expedite robustly. What does the industry jargon "robust" really mean? We will morph the term "B2C". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Without synergies, you will lack implementation. Without synergies, you will lack portals. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? What does the industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our technologies but our capacity to deploy. We will matrix the term "distributed".