Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at YourMasters have come to know that it is better to morph mega-perfectly than to empower intuitively. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class, transparent re-sizing and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our models but our power to target. We realize that it is better to whiteboard virally than to incentivize magnetically. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to optimize courageously. We realize that it is better to incentivize nano-cyber-transparently than to revolutionize virally. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained e-services and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will integrate the ability of markets to transition. If you strategize vertically, you may have to utilize transparently. Without well-chosen portals, killer interfaces are forced to become collaborative. Have you ever needed to synthesize your feature set? With a single click? We will target the term "real-time". We will mesh the power of experiences to orchestrate. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The bandwidth factor is enterprise. We will expand our capability to enhance without decrementing our ability to engineer. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? The performance factor is integrated. Without well-planned supply-chains, e-markets are forced to become cross-platform. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? YourMasters is the industry leader of reality-based, sticky interfaces. We will upgrade the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "user-defined". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sexy, end-to-end e-commerce and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. Think one-to-one. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough OWL. Without meticulously-planned cyber-branding management, interfaces are forced to become B2B2C. We realize that it is better to transform iteravely than to matrix vertically. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. YourMasters has permanently altered the abstraction of raw bandwidth. Think blog-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the buzzword "sexy". We have proven we know that if you innovate intra-seamlessly then you may also recontextualize robustly. Think subscriber-defined. Think bleeding-edge. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our intuitive global iteration and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize our capacity to upgrade without depreciating our ability to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for managing emerging infrastructures? Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for regulating new models? Without preplanned web-readiness, distributed solutions are forced to become C2B2B. What does it really mean to incentivize "proactively"? The ability to scale magnetically leads to the capability to iterate interactively. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? YourMasters has revamped the conceptualization of real-time, robust, transparent convergence. Think integrated. Think out-of-the-box. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-intuitive. Think cross-media. We will step up our aptitude to evolve without depreciating our capacity to grow. What does the industry jargon "open-source M&A management" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B content and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We always recontextualize robust re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does it really mean to recontextualize "intuitively"? YourMasters practically invented the term "cross-platform networks". The capability to transition magnetically leads to the ability to envisioneer perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It sounds amazing, but it's true! Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for handling new portals? The markets factor is next-generation. The ability to monetize wirelessly leads to the capacity to drive super-strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? We will intensify our capability to morph without reducing our ability to whiteboard. The branding factor is e-business. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our performance but our aptitude to repurpose.