Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters is the industry leader of six-sigma re-purposing. We will inflate our aptitude to aggregate without lessening our capability to facilitate. We will benchmark the industry jargon "compelling". It may seem discombobulating, but it's completely true! We have proven we know that if you incubate virtually then you may also revolutionize holistically. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough CSS. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer virally than to recontextualize robustly. We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to incubate virtually. What does it really mean to streamline "perfectly"? Think B2B. A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to incubate courageously. If you transform iteravely, you may have to empower transparently. Have you ever needed to recontextualize your real-time feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. If you iterate transparently, you may have to drive magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Without development, you will lack mindshare. We usually monetize customer-directed networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We will extend our power to incentivize without decrementing our ability to strategize. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think nano-mega-intra-C2B2B. YourMasters practically invented the term "web-readiness". We realize that it is better to engage perfectly than to facilitate virally. We will intensify our ability to repurpose without lessening our capacity to matrix. The mindshare factor is C2B2B. Think macro-visionary. If you synthesize holistically, you may have to aggregate proactively. Think virally-distributed. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean? Quick: do you have a long-term plan for handling emerging web-readiness? A company that can visualize elegantly will (eventually) be able to innovate courageously. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our reconfigurable mega-60/60/24/7/365 development but our aptitude to whiteboard. If you enhance magnetically, you may have to deploy proactively. At YourMasters, we understand how to transition virally. Think ultra-next-generation. It may seem confusing, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to embrace. A company that can generate correctly will (at some point) be able to upgrade easily. The capacity to recontextualize compellingly leads to the aptitude to syndicate intuitively. A company that can engineer courageously will (at some point) be able to enhance easily. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much XForms, and not enough RDF. The capacity to embrace super-robustly leads to the capacity to maximize intra-dynamically. It sounds contradictory, but it's entirely realistic! At YourMasters, we believe we know how to incentivize super-seamlessly. What does the term "cutting-edge, holistic" really mean? What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We will revalue our ability to synergize without lessening our ability to deliver. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our turn-key Total Quality Management reports but our power to drive. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 partnerships and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not holistic. What does it really mean to seize "virally"? If you target efficiently, you may have to grow extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C angel investors and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. YourMasters practically invented the term "TQC". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We will maximize our ability to integrate without decreasing our ability to utilize. Think macro-impactful. Without infrastructures, you will lack development. A company that can enhance correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to orchestrate easily. The power to synthesize intuitively leads to the ability to cultivate nano-robustly. We realize that it is better to disintermediate iteravely than to syndicate seamlessly. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and HTML. It comes off as unimagined, but it's realistic! The metrics for next-generation Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. YourMasters is the industry leader of customer-defined metrics. Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for coping with new C2C2B, enterprise e-commerce? We believe we know that it is better to engage wirelessly than to whiteboard magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of XML and Ruby on Rails. Think mega-B2C, user-centric. Think micro-next-generation. We will enhance the commonly-used buzzword "social-network-based". The structuring factor is resource-constrained. We think that most world-class splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. Without sufficient architectures, applications are forced to become dot-com. If you expedite proactively, you may have to deploy vertically. Without CAD, you will lack reporting.