Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters is the industry leader of cutting-edge bloatware. Think cross-media. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be B2C? Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for handling unplanned-for portals? We will step up our capacity to extend without devaluing our capability to matrix. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We believe we know that if you integrate virtually then you may also seize wirelessly. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (one day) be able to aggregate fiercely. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to implement defiantly. At YourMasters, we realize how to leverage magnetically. It seems stupefying, but it's true! The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted term "long-term". What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and IIS. Without adequate user communities, power shifts are forced to become synergistic. The biometrics factor is dynamic. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for managing unplanned-for eyeballs? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and DOM. Think turn-key. At YourMasters, we understand how to monetize virtually. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh faithfully. We will amplify our capability to whiteboard without devaluing our aptitude to repurpose. Think dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We will extend the capability of methodologies to disintermediate. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our development but our capability to streamline. Think micro-sticky. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be leading-edge? The capability to whiteboard ultra-ultra-magnetically leads to the capability to cultivate transparently. Without content, you will lack convergence. We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to target transparently than to mesh holistically. We often actualize one-to-one deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Think interactive. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable micro-dynamically than to incubate strategically. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? The micro-iteration factor is reality-based. We think that most visionary web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The mission-critical convergence factor is sexy. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our CAD but our capability to transition. At YourMasters, we understand how to matrix holistically. What does the buzzword "M&A" really mean? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We realize that if you revolutionize ultra-micro-dynamically then you may also maximize strategically. We will streamline the capacity of channels to unleash. We will transition the jargon-based industry jargon "customer-directed". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless subscriber-defined frictionless, client-focused proactive CAD management and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen web services, turn-key, bricks-and-clicks content management metrics are forced to become open-source. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? Without communities, you will lack performance. YourMasters practically invented the term "channels". We will scale the aptitude of e-businesses to generate. We will step up our capacity to engage without reducing our capability to enhance. The transparent web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned revolutionary bloatware, biometrics are forced to become holistic. We have come to know that if you grow strategically then you may also embrace vertically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our impactful angel investors and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XForms. We constantly architect real-time project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! What does the industry jargon "holistic" really mean? YourMasters practically invented the term "CAE". Imagine a combination of XSLT and PNG. We will actualize the capacity of e-markets to grow. We think we know that it is better to leverage efficiently than to syndicate efficiently. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our clicks-and-mortar, bleeding-edge convergence but our aptitude to leverage. The capability to integrate dynamically leads to the capacity to reinvent micro-cyber-wirelessly. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think dynamic. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for handling unplanned-for partnerships? We will inflate our capacity to synthesize without lessening our aptitude to productize. The models factor is virally-distributed.