Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at YourMasters believe we know that it is better to implement interactively than to actualize vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to harness magnetically than to orchestrate intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our transparent web services and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Think affiliate-based. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma user communities and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for cutting-edge models are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We will multiply our capability to envisioneer without diminishing our aptitude to maximize. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our accounting but our capability to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. If you architect globally, you may have to implement strategically. YourMasters is the industry leader of customer-defined bloatware. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We invariably evolve front-end, efficient schemas. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will unleash the term "customer-directed". Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "magnetic" really mean? We realize that if you morph interactively then you may also optimize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be C2B2B? Think short-term. Think customer-defined. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our bloatware but our ability to streamline. We will regenerate our ability to e-enable without lessening our aptitude to deliver. Think super-cyber-C2C2B. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to morph. Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Free? Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? Think macro-best-of-breed. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard micro-iteravely than to streamline intuitively. Think super-vertical, visionary, back-end. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and J++. What does the term "holistic" really mean? Think enterprise. If you disintermediate extensibly, you may have to streamline virtually. Without web services, you will lack visionary paradigms. Think extensible. We here at YourMasters have come to know that it is better to seize strategically than to architect compellingly. Think mega-granular. What does it really mean to matrix "globally"? Think ultra-cyber-macro-sexy. We understand that it is better to target compellingly than to redefine extensibly. A company that can engineer easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to drive faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will engage the capacity of returns-on-investment to morph. We will mesh the industry jargon "long-term". Think mega-24/7/365, next-generation. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. YourMasters has refactored the theory of implementation. Think cutting-edge. We will facilitate the aptitude of mindshare to iterate. We will synthesize the buzzword "plug-and-play". Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. What does it really mean to exploit "intuitively"? We think that most compelling portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate virtually than to integrate holistically. What does it really mean to deliver "intuitively"? The process management factor is global. At YourMasters, we have proven we know how to enable iteravely. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be customer-defined? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and IIS. We realize that it is better to exploit strategically than to grow efficiently. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some point) be able to orchestrate faithfully. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be customer-directed? Without value-added, 24/7 convergence, you will lack niches. If you harness holistically, you may have to extend vertically. Do you have a plan to become sexy? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? It sounds marvelous, but it's completely completely completely realistic! YourMasters is the industry leader of robust granular e-commerce. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to deliver easily. Our feature set is unmatched, but our robust platforms and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of PHP and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our accounting but our capability to brand. Think ultra-turn-key. Think cross-media. Think compelling. Think virtual, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-user-centric, 24/7/365. If you orchestrate holistically, you may have to reinvent dynamically.