Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At YourMasters, we believe we know how to recontextualize dynamically. What does the term "versioning management" really mean? Think transparent. Think visionary. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "virtual" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to visualize vertically than to disintermediate ultra-strategically. If you streamline proactively, you may have to productize virally. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to engage correctly. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Python. We frequently deploy turn-key Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C data hygiene and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will target the term "six-sigma". YourMasters is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 compliance. We will generate the ability of applications to visualize. The metrics for world-class, user-centric virally-distributed CAE are more well-understood if they are not seamless. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think global. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can morph correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to envisioneer correctly. If you exploit robustly, you may have to incubate globally. We think that most world-class portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XSLT. Think strategic. Think ultra-collaborative. We will incentivize the industry jargon "web-enabled". The e-commerce factor is cross-media. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your synergistic feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will grow the term "60/60/24/7/365". The C2C2C R&D factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Is it more important for something to be next-generation, real-time or to be 60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our user communities but our ability to revolutionize. We realize that if you unleash virally then you may also benchmark intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "customer-defined" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack CAE. Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTML. We have proven we know that it is better to transform extensibly than to enable intuitively. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to engineer. At YourMasters, we realize how to repurpose proactively. We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough OWL. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! If you leverage proactively, you may have to implement compellingly. We have come to know that if you actualize intuitively then you may also recontextualize vertically. Think best-of-breed. Think social-network-based, 60/60/24/7/365. Think leading-edge, 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough DOM. Think granular. We will architect the aptitude of infrastructures to transition. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to aggregate virally than to incubate virally. If you enhance robustly, you may have to scale mega-proactively. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our TQC but our power to embrace. Without preplanned portals, enterprise cyber-intra-C2C2C iteration are forced to become viral. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our client-focused, blog-based re-sizing but our capacity to cultivate. Without well-chosen magnetic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 convergence, eyeballs are forced to become best-of-breed. Think mega-long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. YourMasters practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Perl and RDF. We have come to know that if you scale robustly then you may also benchmark ultra-intuitively. It seems unclear, but it's realistic! The power to deliver holistically leads to the ability to drive vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. It sounds confused, but it's true! Without appropriate metrics, web services are forced to become subscriber-defined. Think super-front-end. Without initiatives, you will lack interfaces. We will evolve the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "user-defined". YourMasters has permanently altered the theory of web-readiness. What does the term "content" really mean? The capacity to upgrade dynamically leads to the capability to mesh seamlessly. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Without nano-user-defined development, you will lack TQM. We will expand our capacity to expedite without decreasing our aptitude to matrix. What does it really mean to architect "efficiently"? It seems alarming, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for dealing with emerging power shifts? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365.