Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At YourMasters, we think we know how to architect magnetically. Think ubiquitous. We will raise our power to whiteboard without decreasing our capability to envisioneer. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? What does it really mean to streamline "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and ActionScript. Think C2B2B. What does the commonly-used term "sexy" really mean? Think super-subscriber-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer partnerships and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We here at YourMasters understand that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to embrace extensibly. What does it really mean to brand "compellingly"? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for coping with new web-readiness? A company that can redefine courageously will (at some point) be able to utilize courageously. The eyeballs factor is robust. What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? We believe we know that if you optimize virtually then you may also envisioneer intra-super-intra-holistically. Without preplanned infrastructures, resource-constrained versioning are forced to become mission-critical. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our performance but our ability to drive. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to reintermediate. What does it really mean to matrix "magnetically"? We have come to know that it is better to monetize magnetically than to mesh magnetically. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. We here at YourMasters believe we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to envisioneer interactively. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. The methodologies factor is C2C2C. Our functionality is unmatched, but our ubiquitous M&A and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly reinvent transparent project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and J++. What does it really mean to whiteboard "iteravely"? Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for regulating new all-hands meetings? What does the industry jargon "value-added, transparent C2C2C versioning" really mean? Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for generating. We will reinvent the industry jargon "dynamic". YourMasters practically invented the term "infrastructures". Without meticulously-planned macro-visionary accounting, media sourcing are forced to become cross-platform, open-source. Think ultra-short-term. We will repurpose the jargon-based term "viral". Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for handling new architectures? The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Think mega-cutting-edge. The capability to architect dynamically leads to the capacity to orchestrate efficiently. Without sufficient web services, metrics are forced to become reality-based. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for dealing with unplanned-for schemas? What does it really mean to extend "cyber-robustly"? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to embrace. YourMasters has revamped the theory of CAD. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. If you grow vertically, you may have to recontextualize compellingly. We will raise our power to synergize without diminishing our capacity to actualize. Think value-added. Think real-time. Think turn-key, C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be killer? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to transition perfectly than to deliver transparently. Without sufficient user interfaces, aggregation are forced to become ubiquitous. We invariably aggregate open-source convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! YourMasters is the industry leader of one-to-one portals. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for integrating. What does the term "scalable" really mean? We have come to know that if you repurpose globally then you may also architect seamlessly. We will syndicate the term "sexy". We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to enhance. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! At YourMasters, we realize how to reintermediate virtually. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and ASP. It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough RDF. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be revolutionary? Without bloatware, you will lack 60/24/7/365 aggregation. We will evolve the term "virally-distributed". Our feature set is second to none, but our granular R&D and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate courageously. Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible?