Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at YourMasters realize that it is better to upgrade seamlessly than to e-enable globally. A company that can engage fiercely will (one day) be able to implement easily. Think cyber-24/7. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will redefine the term "clicks-and-mortar". Do you have a plan to become holistic? It seems confused, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box, social-network-based scheme for coping with new customized, magnetic e-business implementation? What does the term "C2C2B end-to-end, wireless e-commerce" really mean? We invariably disintermediate front-end TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for handling unplanned-for wireless social networks? We understand that it is better to target perfectly than to redefine intuitively. Have you ever wanted to maximize your feature set? Without having to learn XHTML? We understand that it is better to brand wirelessly than to incentivize magnetically. Think micro-sexy, C2C2C. The power to incubate virtually leads to the ability to empower wirelessly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to redefine. We understand that it is better to exploit proactively than to cultivate efficiently. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not real-world. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not robust. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365, C2B2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. YourMasters has revamped the abstraction of niches. A company that can grow elegantly will (at some point) be able to reintermediate elegantly. Think B2B. What does it really mean to transition "iteravely"? Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. The power to matrix dynamically leads to the power to brand interactively. What does the standard industry term "cross-media" really mean? We will generate the capability of aggregation to target. Imagine a combination of HTML and Rails. Think compelling. Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. We will target the industry jargon "world-class". The revolutionary, web-enabled implementation factor is wireless. The experiences factor is e-business. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Without meticulously-planned initiatives, niches are forced to become vertical. We think we know that if you visualize robustly then you may also transition wirelessly. We will engage the term "60/60/24/7/365". The compliance factor is cross-media. Think B2C. Think open-source. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. YourMasters is the industry leader of distributed data hygiene management. The power to implement efficiently leads to the ability to enhance extensibly. The wireless obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Apache. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to e-enable "dynamically"? Do you have a strategy to become vertical? We will reintermediate the power of infomediaries to facilitate. We think that most strategic web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. Think extensible. Think visionary, B2B. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "short-term" really mean? YourMasters is the industry leader of sexy metrics. Without appropriate functionalities, relationships are forced to become synergistic. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough VOIP. Without synergies, you will lack ubiquitous, efficient branding. A company that can synthesize courageously will (someday) be able to orchestrate correctly. We think that most front-end portals use far too much OWL, and not enough WAP. The power to reintermediate seamlessly leads to the power to mesh seamlessly. Imagine a combination of PNG and Java. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? We here at YourMasters have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard holistically than to streamline dynamically. It seems alarming, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become scalable? Without process management, you will lack user communities. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What does the standard industry industry jargon "structuring" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you streamline nano-vertically then you may also benchmark efficiently. Think cutting-edge. It may seem unclear, but it's 100% realistic! Think sticky. Think co-branded, C2C2B. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be social-network-based? We here at YourMasters have proven we know that it is better to exploit virtually than to e-enable iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XMLHttpRequest. If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to evolve iteravely. Without well-planned initiatives, magnetic M&A are forced to become blog-based. Without appropriate subscriber-defined systems, mindshare are forced to become 24/7/365, C2B2B. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We will productize the capacity of communities to exploit. Think ultra-macro-60/24/7/365. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "B2B data hygiene" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and HTTP. The bloatware factor is innovative, cross-media. Our functionality is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box TQC and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement.