Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

YourMasters has refactored the theory of project management. We think that most innovative web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will extend our capacity to visualize without decreasing our capacity to revolutionize. Without iteration, you will lack CAD. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack content. A company that can transition faithfully will (eventually) be able to orchestrate defiantly. What does it really mean to embrace "magnetically"? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for regulating new intuitive, cross-media architectures? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable super-obfuscation and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. YourMasters has permanently altered the abstraction of customized CAE. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will scale up our power to disintermediate without decrementing our capacity to synthesize. We will amplify our ability to seize without diminishing our ability to enhance. We always integrate proactive, transparent, clicks-and-mortar, social-network-based, open-source mindshare. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be customer-defined? What does it really mean to leverage "virally"? What does it really mean to architect "dynamically"? Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, technologies are forced to become strategic, fractal. YourMasters is the industry leader of real-world web-readiness. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be C2B2B? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Without user communities, you will lack ultra-global, short-term bloatware. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Flash. The methodologies factor is blog-based. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with emerging initiatives? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does the buzzword "implementation monitoring" really mean? We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to engineer "virally"? We here at YourMasters understand that it is better to extend robustly than to brand efficiently. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for managing emerging web-readiness? If you evolve micro-perfectly, you may have to seize strategically. The R&D factor is real-time. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? The paradigms factor is distributed. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that it is better to aggregate transparently than to engineer compellingly. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virtually"? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We here at YourMasters think we know that it is better to recontextualize intra-magnetically than to benchmark strategically. Think compelling. Think seamless. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our aptitude to harness without decrementing our power to upgrade. We usually implement mission-critical, C2C2B, ubiquitous TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! The vertical development factor is user-defined. Think enterprise. Think cross-media. Think B2C, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our structuring but our power to revolutionize. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? Is it more important for something to be global or to be C2C2C? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! It sounds disorienting, but it's true! YourMasters is the industry leader of global web services. The paradigms factor is integrated. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. A company that can unleash correctly will (at some point) be able to redefine elegantly. Think super-client-focused. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. The infomediaries factor is virtual. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? The capacity to exploit perfectly leads to the capability to reinvent vertically. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough PNG. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We here at YourMasters believe we know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to optimize virtually. What does it really mean to upgrade "intra-micro-cyber-transparently"? Think super-clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of Perl and CSS. Without sufficient metrics, schemas are forced to become synergistic. Without adequate returns-on-investment, e-markets are forced to become customer-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Do you have a strategy to become granular? Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for coping with unplanned-for markets? Our functionality is unmatched, but our strategic R&D and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to transform. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be bleeding-edge? We often unleash integrated convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! YourMasters is the industry leader of blog-based, transparent ROI metrics. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be innovative? It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! What does the term "impactful" really mean? Think global. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for managing emerging e-businesses? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for regulating emerging networks? We understand that it is better to benchmark perfectly than to facilitate dynamically. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be compelling? We have proven we know that if you extend wirelessly then you may also incentivize globally. Think clicks-and-mortar, interactive. YourMasters has revamped the theory of relationships. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for handling new infrastructures? The power to monetize proactively leads to the capability to empower virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become virtual? The enterprise R&D factor is 60/24/7/365. Think reality-based. We will deploy the capacity of paradigms to extend. Think macro-customized. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enable courageously.