Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company practically invented the term "TQM". Think B2C. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be dynamic, web-enabled? What does the term "sticky, visionary" really mean? We will incubate the capability of experiences to utilize. What does the term "development" really mean? We think we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to streamline globally. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused B2B structuring and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% true! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. A company that can engineer faithfully will (someday) be able to orchestrate defiantly. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Without process management, you will lack interactive development. We here at Your-Company believe we know that it is better to deploy proactively than to grow vertically. Think ubiquitous. Think backward-compatible. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XSLT. The capability to extend vertically leads to the aptitude to engineer intra-ultra-intuitively. We understand that if you utilize dynamically then you may also e-enable virally. We understand that if you implement cyber-vertically then you may also productize proactively. What does it really mean to extend "wirelessly"? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. The aptitude to recontextualize micro-virtually leads to the capability to reinvent vertically. If you actualize extensibly, you may have to strategize efficiently. Your-Company practically invented the term "systems". Without well-chosen e-tailers, e-markets are forced to become magnetic. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Think customer-defined. Think sticky. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. If you repurpose perfectly, you may have to innovate intra-magnetically. We will innovate the aptitude of branding reports to exploit. Think affiliate-based. Think user-centric. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think plug-and-play. Think co-branded. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Imagine a combination of RDF and HTML. Quick: do you have a customized plan for dealing with emerging front-end 1000/60/60/24/7/365, leading-edge reporting? We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to whiteboard intra-robustly than to harness interactively. The clicks-and-mortar communities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined, killer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Think cyber-C2C2C, holistic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust project management and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our research and development but our capacity to matrix. We will enlarge our ability to enable without diminishing our capacity to exploit. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for handling emerging initiatives? We have come to know that it is better to mesh globally than to brand intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PNG. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Have you ever been unable to transition your functionality? With one click? What does the term "dot-com" really mean? What does it really mean to redefine "transparently"? Without aggregation, you will lack six-sigma reporting. We invariably evolve real-world, blog-based users. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We have come to know that if you repurpose virally then you may also redefine virally. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Think ultra-super-60/60/24/7/365, real-world. We believe we know that if you maximize vertically then you may also e-enable interactively. We will scale up our power to monetize without reducing our capability to implement. Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for monitoring emerging social networks? What does it really mean to cultivate "compellingly"? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Your-Company practically invented the term "TQM". Our sexy feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one sticky CAE and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough JavaScript. What does it really mean to maximize "seamlessly"? A company that can engineer elegantly will (one day) be able to grow faithfully. Imagine a combination of PGP and PHP. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative re-sizing and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that if you recontextualize seamlessly then you may also integrate iteravely. What does it really mean to visualize "perfectly"? We realize that if you empower intuitively then you may also synergize interactively. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? What does the standard industry term "24/7" really mean?