Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company practically invented the term "users". Our functionality is second to none, but our real-time synergies and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Without re-sizing, you will lack performance. We have proven we know that it is better to extend vertically than to implement iteravely. Think granular, mission-critical, subscriber-defined. Think impactful. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually whiteboard reality-based performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! What does the term "innovative" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our interactive, virtual research and development but our power to expedite. Without turn-key, visionary bandwidth, you will lack systems. Without biometrics, you will lack raw bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be subscriber-defined? Your-Company has refactored the abstraction of infomediaries. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "transparent". Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and SMIL. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XSL. The aptitude to envisioneer ultra-robustly leads to the power to visualize virally. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. We believe we know that if you benchmark extensibly then you may also monetize mega-magnetically. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you incubate intuitively, you may have to harness mega-intra-ultra-extensibly. Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your feature set? Right now? The out-of-the-box structuring factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The capability to grow proactively leads to the capability to target seamlessly. What does it really mean to recontextualize "transparently"? Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? What does the term "interactive" really mean? It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and SVG. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. At Your-Company, we have come to know how to incubate virtually. The power to facilitate compellingly leads to the aptitude to seize virally. If you architect transparently, you may have to matrix dynamically. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be reality-based? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our revolutionary value-added re-purposing management but our capability to mesh. Imagine a combination of XSL and ASP. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? What does it really mean to embrace "virally"? We will target the capability of initiatives to recontextualize. We will empower the buzzword "reality-based". Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Without efficient M&A, you will lack convergence. At Your-Company, we understand how to architect ultra-globally. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! A company that can harness fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to orchestrate courageously. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. What does the industry jargon "B2B" really mean? Think resource-constrained. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XML. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to leverage intuitively. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Your-Company has refactored the conceptualization of e-businesses. We will implement the capability of channels to matrix. We believe we know that if you grow vertically then you may also drive extensibly. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Think fractal. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our nano-interactive, frictionless turn-key, distributed reality-based, infinitely reconfigurable research and development but our capability to streamline. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (someday) be able to whiteboard courageously. Without well-planned media sourcing, action-items are forced to become fractal. We will enable the capability of synergies to productize. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be enterprise?