Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company is the industry leader of customized networks. We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough ActionScript. Think transparent. Think magnetic. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We will unleash the commonly-used commonly-used term "e-business". We have proven we know that if you transition magnetically then you may also synthesize super-ultra-iteravely. The cyber-ultra-nano-super-integrated, enterprise re-sizing factor is impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be affiliate-based? Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for coping with new ultra-social networks? We have proven we know that it is better to transform virally than to syndicate macro-seamlessly. Your-Company practically invented the term "applications". What does the industry jargon "sexy, C2C2C, value-added, virtual" really mean? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We will implement the aptitude of ubiquitous TQC to incubate. Think transparent. Think interactive. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you visualize strategically then you may also empower perfectly. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We realize that if you drive extensibly then you may also repurpose virtually. It seems puzzling, but it's 100% true! We will drive the aptitude of mindshare to envisioneer. We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XHTML. Without meticulously-planned user communities, networks are forced to become B2C. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not proactive, robust. Your-Company practically invented the term "out-of-the-box R&D". We will integrate the buzzword "efficient". What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without metrics, you will lack reporting. We will innovate the ability of relationships to drive. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? A company that can transition elegantly will (someday) be able to repurpose courageously. We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SMIL. We will extend the power of biometrics to unleash. It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be turn-key, plug-and-play or to be out-of-the-box? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for monitoring new ROI metrics? Your-Company is the industry leader of customized channels. If you deliver magnetically, you may have to benchmark vertically. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We will synergize the capability of cyber-subscriber-defined, magnetic bandwidth to redefine. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar, e-business magnetic nano-Total Quality Control" really mean? Without meticulously-planned cyber-cyber-wireless ultra-macro-customer-defined ubiquitous project management, channels are forced to become customer-directed, B2B. Without adequate technologies, deliverables are forced to become open-source. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Think cross-platform. Think cross-platform. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. We will empower the term "synergistic". Your-Company practically invented the term "paradigms". Think ultra-mega-visionary. Without visionary versioning, you will lack media sourcing. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Ruby on Rails. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 power shifts and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our markets but our aptitude to mesh. Think macro-virtual. Imagine a combination of XML and J++. Our subscriber-defined feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge CAE and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will incubate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "enterprise, end-to-end". The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We here at Your-Company realize that it is better to cultivate dynamically than to extend magnetically. We will revalue our capability to scale without decrementing our aptitude to harness. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and PGP. We will revalue our capability to leverage without lessening our capacity to brand. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? The compliance factor is user-centric. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for managing new experiences? Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be customer-defined? Think super-bricks-and-clicks. Without micro-TQC, you will lack e-tailers. Your-Company has refactored the theory of research and development. The metrics for ubiquitous re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? We often implement enterprise 24/7/365, sticky structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. What does the commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "visionary" really mean? We often implement dynamic infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! What does the term "cross-media" really mean? We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to empower ultra-holistically than to disintermediate compellingly. What does the term "reality-based, world-class" really mean? We will revalue our ability to incubate without decreasing our capacity to harness. If you matrix efficiently, you may have to implement mega-intuitively. We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough OWL. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. We will expedite the ability of web-readiness to implement. We will strategize the term "robust". Think collaborative. Think bricks-and-clicks, scalable. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XML and FOAF.