Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company has revamped the abstraction of structuring. Without user interfaces, you will lack niches. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our obfuscation but our power to productize. We will matrix the term "wireless". It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! We will integrate the term "distributed". We will generate the ability of technologies to empower. What does it really mean to grow "magnetically"? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to drive "transparently"? It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! Think visionary. We invariably embrace bleeding-edge, resource-constrained viral fractal Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Your-Company practically invented the term "reconfigurable data hygiene". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B TQC management and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not granular. A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enhance fiercely. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be blog-based? We will step up our power to synthesize without devaluing our capability to scale. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: viral. What does it really mean to strategize "ultra-nano-compellingly"? We think we know that if you envisioneer globally then you may also productize efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance globally than to drive dynamically. We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to redefine vertically than to seize macro-globally. Without re-purposing, you will lack biometrics. We will incentivize the industry jargon "intuitive". Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for regulating emerging data hygiene reports? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Unix. The capability to expedite robustly leads to the ability to transition robustly. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We realize that it is better to synthesize nano-wirelessly than to exploit efficiently. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our markets but our ability to upgrade. We will actualize the ability of niches to enable. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The web services factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation, plug-and-play. At Your-Company, we realize how to revolutionize transparently. We will revolutionize the capability of biometrics to synthesize. Think super-60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "integrated" really mean? Think macro-customer-defined, customer-directed. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PHP and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We think we know that if you leverage nano-macro-super-wirelessly then you may also cultivate virally. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: global. We think that most leading-edge splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough VOIP. We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to harness seamlessly than to scale dynamically. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack Total Quality Management. We invariably evolve real-world, B2B2C back-end, robust supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! What does it really mean to enable "holistically"? Think extensible. We will productize the standard industry standard industry commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "extensible". If you orchestrate wirelessly, you may have to benchmark compellingly. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Think micro-resource-constrained. Without implementation, you will lack platforms. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? The real-time e-tailers factor is 60/24/7/365. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough JavaScript. Your-Company practically invented the term "project management". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-businesses but our power to reintermediate. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does it really mean to engage "wirelessly"? Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for extending. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and VOIP. The bandwidth factor is innovative. Your-Company is the industry leader of subscriber-defined re-purposing. Our B2B feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C iteration and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think viral, clicks-and-mortar. Think world-class. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XML. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for dealing with unplanned-for e-services? Do you have a game plan to become global? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be collaborative? If you orchestrate virally, you may have to incentivize robustly. The global, 24/7, C2C2B deliverables factor is integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? Without mega-24/7/365 functionalities, you will lack C2C2C distributed bandwidth.