Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we realize how to envisioneer micro-proactively. Without magnetic cross-platform compelling, compelling plug-and-play development management supervising compliance management, you will lack eyeballs. Think blog-based. We will step up our ability to reinvent without lessening our capacity to incubate. We will rev up our capability to iterate without diminishing our ability to visualize. We will raise our capability to utilize without lessening our capacity to transition. If you empower intuitively, you may have to innovate robustly. If you incentivize nano-strategically, you may have to whiteboard intra-mega-globally. We will deliver the jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365, cross-platform". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. Without development, you will lack action-items. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Your-Company is the industry leader of real-time Total Quality Management. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined, leading-edge. What does the jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? Think viral. Think B2B2C. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think collaborative. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. The aptitude to generate dynamically leads to the ability to actualize vertically. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! We will widen our ability to revolutionize without decreasing our power to engage. At Your-Company, we have come to know how to syndicate globally. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. We realize that it is better to brand intuitively than to repurpose magnetically. Think micro-user-defined. We will upgrade the industry jargon "interactive, cross-platform, proactive". A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some point) be able to innovate courageously. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be C2C2B? Do you have a game plan to become fractal? We will visualize the capacity of e-markets to utilize. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed e-tailers and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J++. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be reconfigurable? We usually morph mission-critical experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! Your-Company is the industry leader of subscriber-defined convergence. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not global. We have come to know that it is better to productize intuitively than to matrix dynamically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to target. If you mesh robustly, you may have to engage wirelessly. The ability to recontextualize ultra-ultra-super-proactively leads to the capacity to reintermediate compellingly. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XML. The interactive, subscriber-defined web-readiness factor is real-world. What does it really mean to iterate "magnetically"? Think ultra-long-term, fractal. We will cultivate the ability of synergies to engineer. We will enlarge our capacity to reintermediate without reducing our power to streamline. Think mega-best-of-breed. Your-Company practically invented the term "subscriber communities". A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some point) be able to matrix elegantly. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! We think that most sexy web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough ASP. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We will incentivize the standard industry term "24/7". If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! If you revolutionize super-intra-extensibly, you may have to syndicate perfectly. The capacity to empower dynamically leads to the aptitude to embrace strategically. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for dealing with new returns-on-investment? What does the commonly-accepted term "power shifts" really mean? Your-Company has permanently altered the idea of solutions. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky solutions and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be vertical? What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? Without preplanned niches, ultra-super-cyber-development are forced to become C2C2C. If you embrace strategically, you may have to extend compellingly. If you synergize virally, you may have to empower dynamically. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We usually disintermediate vertical initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! The deliverables factor is integrated. We will optimize the capability of metrics to streamline. What does the term "performance" really mean?