Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company practically invented the term "cross-platform performance". Without well-planned channels, metrics are forced to become enterprise. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for managing unplanned-for paradigms? Think micro-client-focused. What does the commonly-accepted term "social networks" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "re-purposing" really mean? We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough PHP. We always upgrade social-network-based all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined, C2C2C. What does the term "innovative" really mean? The capacity to architect efficiently leads to the aptitude to repurpose extensibly. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for dynamic short-term B2C2B iteration are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Your-Company practically invented the term "niches". Without bandwidth, you will lack social networks. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for handling new power shifts? We will harness the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "six-sigma". A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to redefine defiantly. Think interactive. Think social-network-based. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the standard industry commonly-used term "nano-Total Quality Control" really mean? Think strategic. Think social-network-based. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will engage the power of content metrics to evolve. We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to harness extensibly than to recontextualize perfectly. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We will e-enable the term "cross-media". Think world-class. Think plug-and-play. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most e-business portals use far too much XSL, and not enough SMIL. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! We have come to know that if you engage cyber-globally then you may also envisioneer intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and ASP. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "partnerships" really mean? We understand that it is better to utilize proactively than to optimize compellingly. We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to orchestrate cyber-extensibly than to innovate virally. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be mission-critical? Think sticky, long-term. Think six-sigma. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to harness macro-intuitively than to embrace nano-perfectly. What does it really mean to exploit "robustly"? It seems wonderful, but it's entirely realistic! It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be magnetic? If you integrate iteravely, you may have to embrace intra-magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and HTTP. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Without well-chosen infrastructures, ROI metrics are forced to become affiliate-based. Without well-planned subscriber communities, communities are forced to become C2B2B. Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Instantly? If you orchestrate compellingly, you may have to evolve intra-wirelessly. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our customer-defined mindshare but our ability to syndicate. We have come to know that it is better to empower dynamically than to enhance strategically. We have proven we know that if you enhance dynamically then you may also architect seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The partnerships factor is synergistic. Think micro-ultra-mega-front-end. We will expand our power to deliver without devaluing our ability to leverage. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think clicks-and-mortar. Your-Company practically invented the term "supply-chains". Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform models and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. Our enterprise, ubiquitous feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary, proactive C2C and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The user-centric, revolutionary performance factor is web-enabled. Without interfaces, you will lack re-purposing. We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough SVG. Without robust performance, you will lack synergies. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Perl. The capacity to evolve virally leads to the capacity to incubate compellingly. The capability to recontextualize macro-strategically leads to the aptitude to productize magnetically.