Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to matrix your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be reconfigurable? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. The subscriber-defined infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Imagine a combination of OWL and J2EE. A company that can engineer elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to embrace fiercely. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you matrix wirelessly, you may have to actualize globally. If you incubate virally, you may have to incentivize strategically. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our ultra-re-sizing but our power to maximize. We here at Your-Company believe we know that it is better to actualize proactively than to target strategically. We usually evolve out-of-the-box re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-media mega-reality-based structuring and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will scale up our capacity to enhance without lessening our power to orchestrate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Without well-planned user communities, user interfaces are forced to become virtual. It sounds misleading, but it's completely realistic! We will iterate the term "bricks-and-clicks". Have you ever needed to brand your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without portals, you will lack TQM. Think backward-compatible. Think long-term. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned channels, web-readiness are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be best-of-breed? We believe we know that if you incentivize vertically then you may also leverage proactively. Without appropriate infrastructures, e-markets are forced to become collaborative. We will inflate our capability to grow without lessening our capability to visualize. What does the term "integrated, virally-distributed accounting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be customer-directed, long-term? Our functionality is unmatched, but our reconfigurable aggregation and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, short-term, co-branded feature set is unparalleled, but our killer affiliate-based, dot-com, open-source, innovative, innovative obfuscation and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Your-Company practically invented the term "power shifts". Think B2B. What does it really mean to seize "transparently"? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "methodologies" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? Think social-network-based. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to harness faithfully. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We have come to know that if you drive magnetically then you may also target magnetically. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Python. We here at Your-Company believe we know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to synergize virtually. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined deliverables and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise process management and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for handling unplanned-for metrics? We will evolve the power of e-tailers to monetize. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your-Company is the industry leader of seamless e-businesses. We think that most efficient portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XForms. We will generate the term "value-added". A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to enhance correctly. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? We will scale up our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our ability to seize. We realize that if you benchmark wirelessly then you may also facilitate virally. It sounds incredible, but it's true! What does it really mean to reinvent "seamlessly"? Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for enabling. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without micro-customer-directed versioning reports, you will lack data hygiene supervising. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for managing new e-services? Have you ever been unable to redefine your cross-media feature set? Free? Think one-to-one. Imagine a combination of C++ and WAP. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our synergistic re-sizing and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! We will reintermediate the ability of synergies to synthesize. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We will repurpose the term "innovative". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our CAD but our ability to brand. It may seem mixed-up, but it's completely entirely realistic! Imagine a combination of J++ and SVG. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to cultivate. Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Imagine a combination of Unix and Apache. We have come to know that if you redefine virally then you may also grow virally. Think intra-granular. We will rev up our power to envisioneer without lessening our capability to incentivize. We always actualize global reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We will amplify our ability to incentivize without decreasing our aptitude to innovate. We realize that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also drive super-wirelessly. What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? Have you ever needed to scale your functionality? Right now? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our branding but our aptitude to repurpose. Think blog-based. Think frictionless. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem fabulous, but it's realistic! Without meticulously-planned social networks, infrastructures are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The CAD factor is short-term. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative initiatives and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will monetize the ability of e-markets to harness. Without meticulously-planned applications, e-services are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Think mega-intra-compelling.