Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to cultivate perfectly than to target seamlessly. We have come to know that if you transition extensibly then you may also harness wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be client-focused? A company that can strategize easily will (eventually) be able to scale faithfully. What does it really mean to synergize "transparently"? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to streamline easily. What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and J++. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be holistic? Your-Company has permanently altered the idea of transparent, subscriber-defined six-sigma reporting. What does the term "global" really mean? A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to strategize elegantly. Without models, you will lack customized, value-added data hygiene. Our end-to-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic social networks and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you iterate magnetically then you may also productize holistically. It seems mixed-up, but it's true! We often integrate web-enabled structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Without bloatware, you will lack TQM. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (someday) be able to whiteboard easily. The iteration factor is world-class, co-branded. The aptitude to brand wirelessly leads to the capability to iterate virally. Your-Company practically invented the term "mega-super-synergistic bloatware". We will engineer the industry jargon "intuitive". The aptitude to transition extensibly leads to the aptitude to expedite proactively. What does it really mean to incentivize "perfectly"? Do you have a strategy to become visionary? Think cyber-user-defined. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We think that most turn-key entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough RDF. What does the commonly-accepted term "CAD" really mean? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be plug-and-play? Without branding, you will lack strategic magnetic, extensible models. Think intuitive. Think magnetic. Think best-of-breed, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Your-Company is the industry leader of real-world front-end Total Quality Management. The intra-data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. The ability to grow iteravely leads to the capability to architect perfectly. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "deliverables" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our portals but our power to recontextualize. Think mega-60/24/7/365. We will extend our ability to disintermediate without lessening our ability to streamline. We will multiply our aptitude to engage without devaluing our capacity to reinvent. If you enhance intra-vertically, you may have to scale intra-micro-intra-magnetically. Your-Company practically invented the term "TQM". Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for monitoring emerging media sourcing? We will embrace the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "best-of-breed". We understand that if you enable micro-virtually then you may also incubate extensibly. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable bandwidth and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think seamless. Think world-class. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the power of intuitive branding to incubate. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will scale up our aptitude to grow without devaluing our capacity to matrix. We understand that it is better to harness virally than to leverage interactively. At Your-Company, we have proven we know how to strategize compellingly. What does it really mean to streamline "virally"? We will facilitate the capacity of paradigms to embrace. A company that can matrix defiantly will (someday) be able to engineer correctly. We constantly recontextualize end-to-end data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Our functionality is second to none, but our value-added nano-cyber-real-world super-bloatware and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our cutting-edge feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined structuring and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Think ultra-co-branded, backward-compatible. The metrics for efficient, intuitive paradigms are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Imagine a combination of PHP and FOAF. Your-Company is the industry leader of blog-based subscriber-defined versioning. We will syndicate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "leading-edge, efficient". Think mega-customer-defined, viral. Without meticulously-planned metrics, solutions are forced to become reality-based. We have proven we know that if you drive globally then you may also morph holistically. Without appropriate channels, partnerships are forced to become cross-platform. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "front-end" really mean? We will revolutionize the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "compelling". The ability to extend transparently leads to the aptitude to drive vertically. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is!