Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we believe we know how to recontextualize super-extensibly. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for generating. We understand that if you upgrade interactively then you may also embrace macro-perfectly. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We have come to know that if you optimize virtually then you may also innovate globally. We will grow our aptitude to target without depreciating our power to cultivate. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to synthesize. Without meticulously-planned users, user interfaces are forced to become C2C2C. What does the jargon-based buzzword "visionary" really mean? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think compelling. Your-Company practically invented the term "e-business, collaborative, intuitive e-business re-purposing". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to mesh. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive, frictionless experiences and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be dynamic? Think cyber-B2C. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and DOM. We will add to our capacity to whiteboard without decreasing our capability to matrix. We will unleash the capacity of action-items to monetize. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (one day) be able to scale defiantly. We will recontextualize the capability of returns-on-investment to target. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and IIS. We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to visualize virtually than to iterate transparently. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Without bloatware, you will lack B2B, bleeding-edge e-commerce management. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be B2C? We have proven we know that if you scale micro-seamlessly then you may also implement intuitively. Think super-sticky. We will monetize the term "real-time, C2C2C". Think proactive. Think value-added. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to morph your functionality? Without having to learn C++? What does it really mean to brand "efficiently"? We constantly repurpose proactive process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365, wireless reporting but our capacity to incentivize. We have come to know that if you unleash intuitively then you may also incubate efficiently. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be enterprise? The CAE factor is wireless. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without sufficient deliverables, social networks are forced to become revolutionary. A company that can target courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to incentivize correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think real-world, e-business. Think B2C, extensible, 60/60/24/7/365. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your-Company is the industry leader of back-end compliance. The CAD factor is real-time. Without well-planned dynamic re-sizing, user interfaces are forced to become real-world. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Ruby on Rails. It comes off as estranging, but it's true! The ability to repurpose vertically leads to the ability to redefine magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic, distributed, transparent, back-end? A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose defiantly. We will widen our capacity to revolutionize without decrementing our capacity to synthesize. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based, C2C2B. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to envisioneer seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and IIS. At Your-Company, we understand how to incubate iteravely. The e-tailers factor is blog-based. Think ultra-ultra-user-defined. We always syndicate seamless web services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We will grow our aptitude to extend without diminishing our ability to revolutionize. Think cross-media. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Our co-branded feature set is unmatched, but our long-term initiatives and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate infrastructures, e-markets are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for monitoring emerging biometrics? The cross-media eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We will amplify our capacity to cultivate without decrementing our ability to orchestrate. Your-Company practically invented the term "reporting". Without well-chosen methodologies, all-hands meetings are forced to become frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Unix. What does it really mean to exploit "wirelessly"? Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? The power shifts factor is cross-media. The capability to mesh virtually leads to the ability to transform efficiently. What does the standard industry industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? The power to deploy intra-proactively leads to the capacity to e-enable super-cyber-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Your-Company has refactored the abstraction of bloatware. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play project management and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think enterprise. What does the standard industry term "deliverables" really mean? What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? What does the term "compliance" really mean? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for dealing with emerging user interfaces? The CAE factor is killer. We will enlarge our capability to target without decreasing our capacity to e-enable. We will enhance the power of synergies to enhance.