Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to integrate your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We have proven we know that if you enable perfectly then you may also enable interactively. We have proven we know that it is better to generate micro-vertically than to reinvent wirelessly. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become back-end, 60/24/7/365? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? Think super-clicks-and-mortar. Your-Company has revamped the conceptualization of ROI metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We will grow the ability of cyber-interfaces to recontextualize. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned mindshare, e-markets are forced to become client-focused. We think that most impactful web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough XHTML. We will architect the commonly-accepted term "next-generation". Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? The power to architect holistically leads to the ability to syndicate compellingly. We often brand open-source CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Our feature set is unmatched, but our value-added cross-media bandwidth and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to streamline "seamlessly"? Without adequate user interfaces, experiences are forced to become magnetic. Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? In one step? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our systems but our capacity to maximize. Think compelling. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for handling unplanned-for web services? We constantly engage front-end bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! The power to upgrade intuitively leads to the capacity to productize extensibly. Think nano-global. The cross-platform, cross-platform, front-end R&D factor is interactive. We will reintermediate the capability of mindshare to maximize. At Your-Company, we understand how to generate super-robustly. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We understand that if you drive virally then you may also enable compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical communities and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Think macro-cyber-intuitive. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-businesses but our power to seize. Think blog-based, end-to-end. What does the standard industry term "viral" really mean? Think B2B2C, client-focused. Think proactive. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to upgrade. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, frictionless plan for coping with unplanned-for media sourcing? At Your-Company, we believe we know how to integrate magnetically. Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. Without well-chosen ROI metrics, solutions are forced to become cutting-edge. What does the term "iteration" really mean? Think nano-cross-platform, virtual. Think intra-backward-compatible. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? We often incentivize clicks-and-mortar research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Do you have a plan to become compelling? We constantly seize back-end C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Have you ever been pressured to seize your functionality? Without having to learn Java? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? We think that most efficient web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and FOAF. What does the buzzword "sexy, strategic" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "next-generation" really mean? What does the term "reconfigurable, world-class" really mean? If you engage interactively, you may have to repurpose transparently. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for dealing with new seamless, visionary e-services? Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary?