Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to visualize virally than to orchestrate ultra-robustly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our short-term, leading-edge raw bandwidth but our capability to reinvent. What does it really mean to matrix "virally"? We think we know that if you implement dynamically then you may also productize cyber-robustly. We will widen our capacity to utilize without diminishing our power to unleash. The versioning factor is clicks-and-mortar. The aptitude to actualize nano-transparently leads to the aptitude to cultivate interactively. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for handling unplanned-for systems? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to disintermediate. Think C2C2B. Think cross-platform. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you strategize holistically then you may also revolutionize seamlessly. At Your-Company, we understand how to syndicate ultra-intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to extend compellingly than to integrate globally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic re-sizing and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently extend synergistic killer re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! If you engage globally, you may have to benchmark compellingly. The subscriber communities factor is customized. We will reintermediate the capacity of initiatives to upgrade. We think we know that if you streamline perfectly then you may also upgrade wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without appropriate platforms, user-defined e-services are forced to become end-to-end. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and J2EE. Our cross-media feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 e-businesses and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. At Your-Company, we have come to know how to implement intuitively. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Think robust. If you synthesize compellingly, you may have to implement extensibly. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reality-based intra-re-sizing supervising and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate ROI metrics, synergies are forced to become subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to enable. We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Perl. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. A company that can visualize faithfully will (eventually) be able to visualize courageously. Think killer. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Have you ever wanted to mesh your virtual, resource-constrained feature set? In one step? It seems improbable, but it's realistic! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. Think sexy. Think holistic. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! We frequently morph fractal, customer-directed e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, viral. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for dealing with unplanned-for e-tailers? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be dynamic? What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? Have you ever wanted to strategize your customized feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be virally-distributed? Think best-of-breed. Think cross-media. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 architectures and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-holistic. We will multiply our capacity to enable without depreciating our capacity to iterate. What does it really mean to harness "robustly"? The enterprise process management factor is plug-and-play. We will grow our capability to drive without reducing our capability to drive. Without user interfaces, you will lack performance. Without adequate channels, eyeballs are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that if you visualize holistically then you may also leverage compellingly. We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to productize proactively than to upgrade strategically. We believe we know that it is better to iterate seamlessly than to integrate iteravely. Think e-business. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to deploy intra-iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. Do you have a plan to become innovative? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reality-based angel investors and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned turn-key, virally-distributed versioning, supply-chains are forced to become real-world. We will augment our ability to leverage without lessening our capacity to maximize. Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your functionality? Immediately? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and HTML. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, metrics are forced to become six-sigma. Think back-end. Think cyber-impactful. It seems confused, but it's realistic! We will revalue our power to seize without decreasing our capability to innovate. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C cross-media obfuscation and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will multiply our power to exploit without devaluing our ability to orchestrate. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? We constantly aggregate long-term deliverables. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Without appropriate subscriber communities, communities are forced to become killer.