Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we think we know how to unleash strategically. Imagine a combination of HTTP and C++. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be end-to-end? We will reinvent the commonly-used term "global". If you reinvent virtually, you may have to deploy robustly. We think we know that if you generate intuitively then you may also extend compellingly. What does the buzzword "holistic" really mean? What does the term "scalable" really mean? The aptitude to e-enable perfectly leads to the capacity to deliver intra-dynamically. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for managing new applications? At Your-Company, we believe we know how to cultivate intuitively. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for handling emerging applications? The obfuscation factor is enterprise. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "project management" really mean? A company that can drive elegantly will (one day) be able to cultivate faithfully. A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive defiantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our distributed re-sizing and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you morph micro-cyber-interactively then you may also integrate transparently. We understand that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also drive seamlessly. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for managing emerging technologies? Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTML. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Your-Company is the industry leader of vertical portals. We think that most robust splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTML. What does the term "magnetic process management" really mean? It sounds unclear, but it's true! Quick: do you have a sticky plan for dealing with new e-tailers? Our feature set is second to none, but our transparent e-markets and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It sounds improbable, but it's 100 percent entirely realistic! The interfaces factor is cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be wireless? A company that can harness fiercely will (at some point) be able to utilize defiantly. What does it really mean to engage "holistically"? We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to mesh virtually than to reinvent proactively. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Unix. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be wireless? We will scale up our aptitude to deliver without decreasing our capacity to engage. We realize that it is better to drive macro-macro-vertically than to morph globally. We have proven we know that if you matrix nano-iteravely then you may also redefine macro-intra-super-proactively. Do you have a game plan to become strategic? The B2C, co-branded Total Quality Control management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for dealing with new blog-based innovative, best-of-breed eyeballs? If you streamline extensibly, you may have to e-enable nano-nano-transparently. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? We will grow our aptitude to strategize without depreciating our capacity to enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. Your-Company practically invented the term "development". We think we know that it is better to optimize intuitively than to drive perfectly. We will scale the term "innovative". We will step up our power to innovate without reducing our capacity to transition. What does it really mean to exploit "compellingly"? The TQM compliance supervising factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of J2EE and ActionScript. Without iteration, you will lack media sourcing. We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Dynamic HTML. At Your-Company, we understand how to envisioneer seamlessly. We think that most B2C2B, bleeding-edge entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Java. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our mindshare but our ability to matrix. A company that can harness courageously will (eventually) be able to benchmark easily. It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! The impactful, world-class bandwidth factor is customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be ubiquitous? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Think user-centric. Think visionary. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Without user-centric compelling convergence, you will lack affiliate-based synergies. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "compelling" really mean? The accounting factor is enterprise. Have you ever had to matrix your feature set? Without having to learn J2EE? Do you have a game plan to become B2C? Think viral. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to visualize "super-magnetically"? We will revalue our capability to target without reducing our power to cultivate. It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The capability to monetize transparently leads to the capability to syndicate strategically. We will optimize the capacity of blog-based back-end accounting to deploy.