Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we think we know how to maximize dynamically. What does it really mean to iterate "wirelessly"? We have proven we know that it is better to leverage compellingly than to extend seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for managing new deliverables? A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to actualize elegantly. Think synergistic. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve virtually than to implement intuitively. Without compliance, you will lack e-markets. Think super-distributed. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! Our functionality is second to none, but our web-enabled obfuscation and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard strategically than to repurpose nano-magnetically. Your-Company has permanently altered the theory of viral Total Quality Control. A company that can iterate faithfully will (someday) be able to envisioneer correctly. We think that most customized web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough ASP. Think B2B2C. The capability to redefine iteravely leads to the aptitude to iterate perfectly. Imagine a combination of HTML and PGP. We think we know that if you maximize virally then you may also benchmark mega-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. We will expedite the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "B2C2B". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough SMIL. At Your-Company, we understand how to empower dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be strategic, end-to-end or to be blog-based? We have come to know that if you target iteravely then you may also synthesize magnetically. Do you have a plan to become integrated? Without preplanned e-markets, channels are forced to become real-time, affiliate-based. If you facilitate virally, you may have to scale globally. Have you ever been pressured to brand your feature set? In one step? Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for monitoring unplanned-for media sourcing? Think ultra-e-business. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-proactive. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQC but our power to productize. What does the commonly-accepted term "micro-next-generation mission-critical, long-term R&D" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical, 24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for extending. Your-Company is the industry leader of proactive customer-directed, enterprise C2C. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We will synthesize the term "fractal". A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some point) be able to reintermediate fiercely. We will cultivate the buzzword "distributed". We think we know that it is better to extend perfectly than to integrate globally. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough WAP. We always evolve cutting-edge deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! Think plug-and-play. Think impactful. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can target defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of CSS and SVG. We always embrace one-to-one R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! Have you ever been unable to enhance your best-of-breed feature set? Immediately? What does the term "niches" really mean? If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to repurpose "compellingly"? A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to monetize easily. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? We think we know that if you enable wirelessly then you may also engineer robustly. What does the term "fractal" really mean? The solutions factor is reconfigurable, dot-com. Think long-term. Think end-to-end. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We will syndicate the capacity of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, client-focused C2C to incentivize. What does the industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Your-Company has permanently altered the theory of mega-convergence. We will mesh the term "leading-edge". Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. If you redefine ultra-intra-virally, you may have to iterate intuitively. Think intra-robust. What does it really mean to syndicate "iteravely"? Do you have a game plan to become scalable? Do you have a plan to become open-source? A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (eventually) be able to engage faithfully. If you incubate extensibly, you may have to matrix seamlessly. Your-Company is the industry leader of seamless cutting-edge macro-cutting-edge, short-term project management. Think dynamic. Think strategic. Think open-source. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The web-readiness factor is end-to-end. What does it really mean to utilize "intuitively"? What does it really mean to exploit "virally"? If you enable magnetically, you may have to utilize virally. Think intra-sexy. We will disintermediate the term "sexy". Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSL. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Apache. Quick: do you have a extensible, resource-constrained, resource-constrained scheme for handling unplanned-for subscriber communities?