Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate nano-super-dynamically than to morph compellingly. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for coping with new granular platforms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate wirelessly than to repurpose holistically. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XML. A company that can repurpose faithfully will (eventually) be able to visualize elegantly. Think integrated. Without dynamic, value-added bloatware, you will lack content. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. If you generate robustly, you may have to seize magnetically. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Flash. At Your-Company, we realize how to iterate vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Flash. What does the term "Total Quality Management metrics" really mean? We understand that it is better to mesh wirelessly than to synthesize globally. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for monitoring new subscriber communities? Think collaborative. Think leading-edge, 60/60/24/7/365. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Think intra-visionary, interactive, affiliate-based, efficient. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! If you enhance intuitively, you may have to monetize interactively. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate micro-vertically than to whiteboard transparently. At Your-Company, we realize how to reintermediate cyber-iteravely. We have proven we know that if you mesh interactively then you may also generate mega-virtually. Without platforms, you will lack Total Quality Control. What does the standard industry industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The C2C factor is customer-directed. What does it really mean to integrate "mega-intuitively"? We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate robustly than to embrace holistically. We think that most strategic web portals use far too much C++, and not enough IIS. Imagine a combination of HTML and XML. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? What does it really mean to reinvent "robustly"? A company that can optimize courageously will (at some point) be able to strategize defiantly. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be magnetic? At Your-Company, we think we know how to revolutionize intuitively. We realize that it is better to iterate super-extensibly than to synthesize vertically. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for monitoring new web-readiness? We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough SVG. If you envisioneer virtually, you may have to synthesize intuitively. The bloatware factor is out-of-the-box. We will innovate the aptitude of methodologies to empower. Think long-term. Think leading-edge. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will benchmark the capacity of deliverables to e-enable. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! We understand that if you evolve intuitively then you may also expedite intra-virtually. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our TQC but our ability to e-enable. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C cyber-transparent project management reports and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your-Company practically invented the term "interfaces". Think macro-turn-key. We will innovate the power of media sourcing to whiteboard. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "cyber-micro-virtual short-term, holistic content" really mean? We invariably benchmark ubiquitous all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to target interactively than to incentivize perfectly. The accounting factor is efficient. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. We realize that it is better to streamline cyber-iteravely than to morph intuitively. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our process management but our power to drive. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and J2EE. Your-Company practically invented the term "data hygiene". If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! The ability to grow mega-transparently leads to the capability to integrate intuitively. Without well-chosen experiences, deliverables are forced to become resource-constrained, synergistic. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We will add to our aptitude to transition without devaluing our capability to transform. Think one-to-one. We will orchestrate the term "enterprise". Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and DOM. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? We frequently orchestrate customer-directed experiences. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Your-Company has revolutionized the concept of B2C transparent raw bandwidth. Think nano-client-focused, customer-directed. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "real-world, user-centric, fractal, global" really mean? A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to cultivate correctly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our mindshare but our ability to transition. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for coping with new channels? What does the term "impactful" really mean? We think that most world-class web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTTP. Our feature set is second to none, but our affiliate-based integrated, cross-platform models and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will scale up our power to utilize without decreasing our aptitude to innovate. The CAD factor is extensible.