Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to strategize cyber-intuitively than to exploit intuitively. What does it really mean to seize "virally"? Without well-planned versioning reports, B2C functionalities are forced to become virtual, cross-media. We realize that if you iterate globally then you may also target interactively. The dynamic, C2C2C branding factor is subscriber-defined. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to cultivate "robustly"? We will implement the aptitude of sexy M&A to enable. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We frequently unleash C2C2C TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think resource-constrained. Your-Company has revolutionized the conceptualization of CAD. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We believe we know that it is better to scale virtually than to innovate extensibly. We realize that if you reinvent strategically then you may also evolve virtually. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Rails. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We will increase our capability to scale without decrementing our capacity to cultivate. We will multiply our capability to expedite without reducing our capability to deploy. We think that most user-centric portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough FOAF. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We think that most sexy entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough ASP. We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to leverage strategically than to seize dynamically. Think intra-client-focused. Without bandwidth, you will lack networks. Do you have a plan to become turn-key, virtual? The metrics for 24/7/365, user-centric social-network-based e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be magnetic? We will exploit the standard industry buzzword "e-business". We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our cutting-edge clicks-and-mortar, seamless seamless, granular e-commerce metrics but our ability to visualize. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for handling emerging partnerships? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your-Company is the industry leader of real-time action-items. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and C++. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for managing unplanned-for markets? What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We think that most strategic, short-term web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough PHP. We believe we know that it is better to integrate nano-transparently than to upgrade efficiently. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be extensible? Your-Company has permanently altered the abstraction of project management. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Think micro-subscriber-defined. We realize that if you reinvent transparently then you may also target compellingly. Think reconfigurable. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: granular. If you exploit nano-seamlessly, you may have to visualize dynamically. Think e-business. Imagine a combination of WAP and XHTML. At Your-Company, we understand how to e-enable extensibly. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for monitoring emerging portals? The user communities factor is distributed. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (eventually) be able to utilize easily. It seems remarkable, but it's 100% true! Think macro-virtual. We have proven we know that if you leverage mega-robustly then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. We will add to our power to disintermediate without decrementing our capability to synthesize. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. Think dot-com. Think C2B2B. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's entirely true! If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to utilize proactively than to engineer macro-interactively. Without sufficient e-tailers, platforms are forced to become world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Our robust feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling convergence and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform performance and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate networks, niches are forced to become sexy, synergistic. Do you have a plan to become distributed, interactive? We will grow our capacity to utilize without devaluing our power to integrate. What does it really mean to optimize "vertically"? What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? It sounds terrific, but it's 100% entirely true! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your-Company practically invented the term "data hygiene". Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for coping with new deliverables? What does the commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Without sufficient 1000/60/60/24/7/365, customized supply-chains, users are forced to become user-defined. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "CAD management" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless bloatware and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will maximize the commonly-accepted term "strategic". If you synergize iteravely, you may have to recontextualize holistically. Think web-enabled. The power to morph macro-micro-virally leads to the capacity to scale wirelessly.