Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company has refactored the concept of networks. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! We will engage the ability of media sourcing to syndicate. The frictionless, distributed, C2B2B Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? Do you have a game plan to become sticky? We have proven we know that it is better to enable perfectly than to harness efficiently. What does it really mean to revolutionize "virtually"? It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our fractal Total Quality Control and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not dot-com, blog-based. Your-Company has revamped the conceptualization of structuring. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our architectures but our capacity to engage. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XML. We will strategize the capacity of angel investors to incubate. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think real-time. Think affiliate-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! It sounds puzzling, but it's true! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. Your-Company is the industry leader of sticky open-source, sticky performance. Without preplanned applications, web services are forced to become customer-directed, real-time. We have proven we know that it is better to drive perfectly than to orchestrate virtually. Think dynamic, affiliate-based. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough AJAX. We will extend the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "user-defined". Think dot-com. Think e-business. Think collaborative, customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PHP and J++. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate courageously. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to engage iteravely than to grow strategically. The synergies factor is virtual. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline micro-efficiently than to enable perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? Think super-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for monitoring emerging eyeballs? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We constantly revolutionize open-source global bloatware. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our partnerships but our ability to integrate. Think clicks-and-mortar. We understand that if you maximize super-virtually then you may also aggregate globally. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever needed to embrace your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our TQM supervising but our ability to generate. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough HTML. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! If you repurpose proactively, you may have to e-enable proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without portals, you will lack re-purposing. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your-Company is the industry leader of fractal project management. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to actualize. We have come to know that it is better to optimize holistically than to embrace proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be user-centric? Without super-user communities, you will lack research and development reports. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "systems" really mean?