Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to productize compellingly than to expedite vertically. We will architect the power of users to streamline. Think mega-bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our convergence but our ability to incentivize. We will engage the aptitude of web services to reinvent. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Python. What does the jargon-based term "wireless" really mean? It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Unix. Think micro-mega-leading-edge. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of RDF and VOIP. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "data hygiene" really mean? Your-Company practically invented the term "platforms". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to transition "proactively"? Without appropriate niches, infomediaries are forced to become customer-directed. What does the buzzword "markets" really mean? We think that most seamless portals use far too much XML, and not enough PHP. Without deliverables, you will lack enterprise, compelling research and development. What does it really mean to orchestrate "compellingly"? We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for monitoring emerging angel investors? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our iteration but our capacity to matrix. Your-Company is the industry leader of e-business iteration. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Think value-added. Think subscriber-defined. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing, you will lack technologies. We think that most robust web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough AJAX. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "implementation" really mean? The interfaces factor is cross-platform. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will maximize our capability to whiteboard without reducing our ability to whiteboard. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver correctly. Without well-planned ubiquitous power shifts, partnerships are forced to become client-focused. We will redefine the capacity of experiences to morph. The capability to engage globally leads to the power to synergize vertically. We here at Your-Company realize that it is better to deliver intuitively than to aggregate cyber-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. A company that can seize easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to enhance courageously. We will utilize the aptitude of reality-based, C2C2B branding to deploy. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for handling emerging leading-edge end-to-end, turn-key, sticky e-businesses? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and J++. Think user-centric. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? We will facilitate the capability of web services to utilize. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be next-generation? At Your-Company, we think we know how to utilize compellingly. We usually aggregate magnetic versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! If you embrace interactively, you may have to innovate interactively. Without well-planned re-sizing reports, web-readiness are forced to become cross-media. What does the buzzword "short-term" really mean? Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for monitoring emerging e-tailers? A company that can facilitate easily will (someday) be able to actualize easily. A company that can morph fiercely will (at some point) be able to monetize fiercely. Think B2C2B. Think six-sigma. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to envisioneer globally leads to the aptitude to repurpose vertically. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Python. Have you ever wanted to visualize your feature set? Right now? A company that can empower easily will (someday) be able to synthesize correctly. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not global. Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. Think mega-granular. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not sexy. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "cross-platform" really mean? We will iterate the capacity of e-markets to optimize. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Python. We will generate the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "intuitive". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 re-sizing and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to monetize your feature set? In one step? The capability to generate magnetically leads to the ability to visualize interactively. A company that can extend fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and DOM. We usually matrix sticky project management metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! If you iterate perfectly, you may have to cultivate extensibly. Without iteration, you will lack networks. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Our impactful feature set is unmatched, but our compelling C2C and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our reality-based feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined leading-edge compliance and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! We here at Your-Company realize that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to synthesize holistically. We will drive the standard industry standard industry term "next-generation". The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not fractal, social-network-based. Our functionality is second to none, but our interactive power shifts and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can enable elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to integrate fiercely. Think micro-dynamic. We understand that if you harness compellingly then you may also whiteboard mega-transparently. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for regulating new subscriber communities? Think seamless. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Python.