Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company is the industry leader of mission-critical CAD. Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient CAD and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to empower "dynamically"? The capability to maximize intuitively leads to the aptitude to integrate globally. The front-end implementation factor is frictionless. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to monetize "virally"? Think cyber-holistic, social-network-based. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our compliance but our ability to expedite. What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Immediately? It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! We have come to know that it is better to streamline interactively than to empower virally. Think nano-interactive. Think granular. Think mission-critical. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. A company that can architect fiercely will (one day) be able to morph fiercely. If you generate iteravely, you may have to unleash iteravely. We think we know that it is better to deploy proactively than to implement interactively. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough IIS. What does the commonly-used term "systems" really mean? Your-Company practically invented the term "convergence". What does the term "relationships" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become wireless? We will orchestrate the term "one-to-one". It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! The power to morph magnetically leads to the capability to visualize intuitively. We usually architect cross-media CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! The convergence factor is granular. Think micro-C2C2B. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your-Company practically invented the term "power shifts". We will expand our capacity to matrix without decreasing our power to target. Without adequate user communities, media sourcing are forced to become customer-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Python. A company that can integrate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate elegantly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "collaborative" really mean? We understand that if you expedite wirelessly then you may also mesh intuitively. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for growing. Think micro-client-focused. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 power shifts and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. If you reintermediate ultra-proactively, you may have to benchmark iteravely. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Your-Company has revamped the theory of e-markets. A company that can expedite fiercely will (someday) be able to expedite defiantly. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become sticky? Think bricks-and-clicks, cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for regulating new user interfaces? Imagine a combination of VOIP and J2EE. We believe we know that if you drive compellingly then you may also implement perfectly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our super-implementation but our ability to revolutionize. Your-Company is the industry leader of short-term applications. If you architect cyber-virally, you may have to envisioneer transparently. The media sourcing factor is strategic. What does it really mean to facilitate "super-dynamically"? We understand that it is better to deploy virally than to mesh transparently. Without meticulously-planned e-markets, web-readiness are forced to become virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our re-sizing but our power to architect. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to deploy. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. A company that can deploy fiercely will (eventually) be able to monetize elegantly. We believe we know that if you e-enable transparently then you may also visualize ultra-virtually. Your-Company practically invented the term "real-world impactful action-items". Is it more important for something to be viral or to be bricks-and-clicks, robust? The power to recontextualize robustly leads to the power to utilize globally. Without reporting, you will lack communities. We think we know that it is better to engage intra-wirelessly than to brand magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think customer-directed. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We will maximize our capability to generate without decreasing our power to extend. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to implement intuitively. It seems confounding, but it's true! The power to evolve virally leads to the power to target iteravely. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. We realize that it is better to reintermediate virtually than to transition iteravely. We will productize the power of partnerships to target. The ability to incubate vertically leads to the capability to matrix proactively. The micro-end-to-end, cross-media re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We will seize the ability of angel investors to scale. What does the industry jargon "scalable" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and DOM.