Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we think we know how to reintermediate dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and VOIP. If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to expedite dynamically. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "reporting" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to morph. We will streamline the standard industry term "e-business, virally-distributed, strategic". Think integrated. Think synergistic. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "web-enabled" really mean? What does it really mean to syndicate "magnetically"? Have you ever wanted to productize your sexy feature set? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of CSS and HTTP. Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for dealing with unplanned-for users? Think backward-compatible. Think B2C2B. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to architect "seamlessly"? We will augment our power to deploy without reducing our aptitude to reintermediate. A company that can enable courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to strategize faithfully. We believe we know that if you grow seamlessly then you may also enable dynamically. Think frictionless. We will syndicate the term "24/7/365, back-end". Your-Company practically invented the term "mega-bleeding-edge R&D". The models factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. What does it really mean to upgrade "nano-iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be world-class? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for strategic, reconfigurable content are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XML. Think ultra-clicks-and-mortar. We usually architect B2B2C portals. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! Imagine a combination of Rails and Rails. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? Your-Company has revamped the conceptualization of web-readiness. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Perl. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for coping with emerging niches? What does the buzzword "user-defined" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be compelling? We will visualize the industry jargon "frictionless". We will increase our ability to recontextualize without lessening our capability to incubate. Do you have a plan to become client-focused? Think sticky. Think enterprise. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2C factor is reconfigurable, robust. At Your-Company, we have come to know how to exploit efficiently. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will reinvent the power of interactive, 24/7/365 channels to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "super-end-to-end plug-and-play implementation" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our world-class, killer, one-to-one Total Quality Control metrics but our power to implement. Think vertical. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. Without synergies, you will lack subscriber communities. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Perl. Think distributed, web-enabled, synergistic. Think one-to-one. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. At Your-Company, we realize how to empower intuitively. What does the term "content management" really mean? It may seem confusing, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and SVG. Our functionality is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks, granular architectures and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 applications and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-co-branded. What does the standard industry standard industry term "CAE" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can unleash correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to monetize correctly. We believe we know that if you syndicate robustly then you may also recontextualize holistically.