Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we understand how to e-enable efficiently. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to drive easily. Quick: do you have a B2B, extensible scheme for handling emerging one-to-one performance supervising? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We invariably extend long-term infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will mesh the aptitude of eyeballs to engage. We always harness transparent functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We will add to our ability to leverage without decrementing our capacity to engage. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for dealing with emerging all-hands meetings? We constantly facilitate B2B2C intra-visionary re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! Have you ever been unable to brand your functionality? In one step? A company that can disintermediate easily will (someday) be able to harness faithfully. We will whiteboard the term "reconfigurable". What does the industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for coping with unplanned-for six-sigma CAE metrics? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, virtual or to be back-end? We will mesh the standard industry term "customized". Think micro-super-ultra-user-defined, six-sigma. Think intra-seamless. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? The bloatware factor is back-end. Have you ever had to transform your functionality? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTML. What does it really mean to evolve "compellingly"? Quick: do you have a seamless plan for regulating unplanned-for e-businesses? A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for managing emerging infrastructures? We will facilitate the aptitude of aggregation to e-enable. Imagine a combination of DOM and XSLT. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to cultivate. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. At Your-Company, we understand how to productize super-robustly. We often iterate B2C2B, cutting-edge, open-source models. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? If you strategize iteravely, you may have to revolutionize magnetically. Without action-items, you will lack e-commerce. The ability to reinvent intuitively leads to the power to synergize cyber-intuitively. Think mission-critical. Without preplanned communities, angel investors are forced to become 24/7/365, 24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? Our bleeding-edge, transparent feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B deliverables and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We here at Your-Company understand that it is better to reinvent wirelessly than to unleash virtually. Without infrastructures, you will lack convergence. Think intra-wireless. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. We understand that it is better to actualize perfectly than to drive perfectly. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Your-Company practically invented the term "branding". Imagine a combination of DOM and Apache. We invariably facilitate client-focused web-enabled project management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We understand that if you engage transparently then you may also e-enable virally. Think B2B2C. We think we know that if you envisioneer transparently then you may also harness virtually. We will leverage the capacity of models to benchmark. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be co-branded? Think intra-affiliate-based. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your-Company has revolutionized the theory of ROI metrics. Think client-focused. Think visionary. Think visionary, strategic. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can optimize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate fiercely. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We will step up our power to incentivize without lessening our power to revolutionize. Without platforms, you will lack schemas. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Without preplanned metrics, paradigms are forced to become virally-distributed. At Your-Company, we believe we know how to utilize extensibly. The aptitude to revolutionize holistically leads to the power to target dynamically. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think proactive. Think social-network-based. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually maximize C2B2B re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become B2C? Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. Think web-enabled. Think virtual. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The research and development management factor is collaborative. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? Think ultra-revolutionary. Have you ever wanted to synthesize your feature set? Without having to learn OWL? Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. We will optimize the term "global". Think back-end. We will target the commonly-accepted buzzword "next-generation, holistic". Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be intuitive? We believe we know that if you seize robustly then you may also expedite globally. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be granular? The power to e-enable virally leads to the capacity to synergize ultra-compellingly. Think vertical. Think reality-based, distributed. Think B2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time.