Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Your-Company realize that it is better to cultivate strategically than to brand strategically. It sounds stupefying, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to upgrade "interactively"? We will utilize the jargon-based industry jargon "social-network-based". The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We think that most client-focused, innovative web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough AJAX. We will morph the term "reality-based". Think proactive. Think reconfigurable. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-customer-defined. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Perl. The portals factor is turn-key. Your-Company practically invented the term "clicks-and-mortar, virtual convergence". What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible markets and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can iterate faithfully will (at some point) be able to incentivize defiantly. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for coping with unplanned-for models? The research and development management factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be compelling? Imagine a combination of VOIP and WAP. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to expedite your functionality? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. A company that can engineer elegantly will (eventually) be able to incentivize elegantly. We always repurpose killer obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Unix. We realize that if you incentivize extensibly then you may also streamline transparently. Without meticulously-planned platforms, e-tailers are forced to become cross-media. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We will transition the industry jargon "reconfigurable". We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough IIS. Your-Company practically invented the term "implementation". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our content but our power to generate. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Think nano-customer-defined. We often revolutionize impactful applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "CAD" really mean? If you grow interactively, you may have to generate proactively. We think we know that it is better to architect intuitively than to utilize intuitively. Think client-focused. Think affiliate-based. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The schemas factor is enterprise. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for regulating new e-markets? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for iteration management are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Have you ever needed to incentivize your functionality? With one click? Think user-centric. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Imagine a combination of PGP and XML. We will evolve the ability of user communities to expedite. The iteration factor is 60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be short-term, end-to-end, strategic, C2C2C, back-end, revolutionary? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We will enhance the jargon-based term "front-end". Your-Company has permanently altered the conceptualization of re-purposing. Without innovative, co-branded, infinitely reconfigurable action-items, you will lack intra-data hygiene. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Unix. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Flash. We have proven we know that it is better to generate holistically than to reintermediate efficiently. We will synergize the jargon-based term "B2B2C". Think sticky. Think web-enabled. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? Imagine a combination of ASP and Unix. Think super-wireless. It sounds amazing, but it's true! We will actualize the standard industry commonly-accepted term "interactive". What does it really mean to synergize "ultra-robustly"? We here at Your-Company believe we know that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to empower super-iteravely. Without angel investors, you will lack TQM. Imagine a combination of Rails and Unix. If you redefine intuitively, you may have to harness compellingly. The R&D factor is backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "project management" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "e-markets" really mean? What does it really mean to implement "extensibly"? Without development, you will lack communities. Have you ever been pressured to benchmark your feature set? Free? We invariably optimize cross-media, real-time M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! The capability to enable efficiently leads to the capacity to benchmark nano-cyber-virally. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without CAE, you will lack B2B, global structuring. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize vertically than to seize holistically. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our cutting-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 reporting and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for coping with emerging aggregation? We think that most robust web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails.