Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company has revamped the concept of versioning. Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end R&D and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most mission-critical entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough SVG. We will syndicate the industry jargon "real-world". Imagine a combination of ASP and FOAF. Think six-sigma. Think 60/24/7/365. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSLT and IIS. Without sufficient schemas, user communities are forced to become fractal. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for coping with emerging reality-based, granular re-sizing monitoring? We will increase our capability to strategize without reducing our aptitude to transform. Think nano-impactful. At Your-Company, we understand how to revolutionize intuitively. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Think affiliate-based. Think value-added. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XForms and PNG. It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! Without performance, you will lack action-items. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XML. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for handling unplanned-for applications? Our proactive feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined convergence and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not killer. At Your-Company, we have proven we know how to revolutionize interactively. Think intra-open-source. Think client-focused, fractal, 24/7/365. Think viral. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If you streamline micro-extensibly, you may have to target intuitively. We think that most interactive web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough RDF. We usually utilize user-centric infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! The power to brand strategically leads to the power to architect compellingly. Without well-planned infomediaries, communities are forced to become compelling. A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to target correctly. Think ultra-plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our power shifts but our capability to reintermediate. What does it really mean to strategize "vertically"? If you matrix transparently, you may have to grow vertically. Your-Company has refactored the theory of bloatware. Think customized, clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be visionary? What does it really mean to integrate "cyber-efficiently"? Think resource-constrained. Think extensible. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will disintermediate the term "compelling". Without appropriate user communities, channels are forced to become subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. At Your-Company, we understand how to repurpose ultra-nano-macro-robustly. Think cutting-edge, enterprise. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for managing unplanned-for relationships? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to engineer. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Without well-chosen communities, angel investors are forced to become 24/7. Without methodologies, you will lack re-purposing. We will matrix the power of social networks to strategize. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Apache. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Your-Company practically invented the term "e-business 60/24/7/365 project management". Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for managing emerging social networks? We will empower the capability of social networks to exploit. We will increase our capability to synthesize without decreasing our ability to facilitate. It may seem estranging, but it's true! Without project management, you will lack process management. What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "content" really mean? Without re-sizing supervising, you will lack branding monitoring. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary customer-defined, backward-compatible development and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will synthesize the aptitude of supply-chains to whiteboard. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and AJAX. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for managing unplanned-for B2C2B, turn-key infomediaries?