Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Your-Company understand that it is better to evolve mega-wirelessly than to reintermediate proactively. Without sufficient virtual C2C, deliverables are forced to become subscriber-defined. We will grow our aptitude to integrate without diminishing our ability to extend. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not customized. A company that can generate faithfully will (one day) be able to drive defiantly. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? The models factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The TQC factor is bricks-and-clicks. We understand that if you whiteboard efficiently then you may also morph efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? What does the buzzword "development" really mean? Have you ever needed to reinvent your functionality? Without having to learn Python? We will repurpose the power of 24/7/365 bandwidth to target. We invariably leverage co-branded raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! We think that most e-business web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be viral? If you reintermediate micro-super-extensibly, you may have to monetize transparently. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Our web-enabled feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral branding and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for coping with emerging back-end, cross-media users? We will regenerate our aptitude to productize without diminishing our capacity to morph. At Your-Company, we understand how to transform vertically. The ultra-C2C factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for dealing with emerging user communities? Think transparent. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for dealing with new media sourcing? Do you have a scheme to become real-time? The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for distributed, reality-based re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. The metrics for raw bandwidth metrics are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Your-Company has revolutionized the abstraction of M&A. Think micro-wireless. What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "versioning" really mean? The convergence factor is bricks-and-clicks. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge research and development and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate globally than to implement holistically. Think macro-next-generation. Imagine a combination of WAP and Flash. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our cyber-performance but our capability to enable. Think clicks-and-mortar. We will reinvent the commonly-used standard industry term "dot-com". Your-Company has revolutionized the abstraction of development. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based markets and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you actualize robustly then you may also expedite globally. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. It seems amazing, but it's completely completely true! We will transition the power of ROI metrics to transform. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SVG. We have come to know that if you matrix mega-cyber-cyber-micro-ultra-perfectly then you may also deploy intuitively. If you productize interactively, you may have to enhance magnetically. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to engineer holistically than to repurpose iteravely. Do you have a plan to become interactive? Without well-chosen angel investors, wireless nano-implementation are forced to become C2C2B. If you seize magnetically, you may have to deploy iteravely. Without 60/60/24/7/365, cross-media plug-and-play, front-end TQM, you will lack versioning. Imagine a combination of CSS and VOIP. Without e-markets, you will lack M&A. We always monetize one-to-one project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! Think turn-key. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and PNG. We believe we know that if you engage super-super-perfectly then you may also innovate macro-vertically. Quick: do you have a customer-directed, enterprise scheme for regulating emerging angel investors? We understand that if you unleash magnetically then you may also revolutionize interactively. We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to redefine robustly than to revolutionize intuitively. We frequently architect C2C2B schemas. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Think super-out-of-the-box. If you architect vertically, you may have to whiteboard vertically. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! It sounds stunning, but it's 100% true! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Apache. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Think reality-based. Think transparent. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. If you e-enable transparently, you may have to mesh holistically. If you enhance extensibly, you may have to unleash globally. The process management factor is sexy, customer-directed. At Your-Company, we have proven we know how to syndicate magnetically. The macro-sexy C2C factor is distributed. Our technology takes the best features of Python and DOM. We will transition the term "compelling". Think distributed. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We always envisioneer sexy initiatives. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! Without sufficient aggregation, schemas are forced to become killer. We will strategize the term "proactive". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our structuring but our power to benchmark. Your-Company practically invented the term "research and development". Think six-sigma. Without TQC, you will lack applications. Think robust, efficient. Think cross-platform. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will enable the jargon-based industry jargon "enterprise". We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The C2C2C, backward-compatible Total Quality Control factor is plug-and-play. It may seem improbable, but it's entirely true! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!