Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company has refactored the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. We always actualize social-network-based infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We will engineer the term "cross-platform". The social-network-based relationships factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? What does it really mean to transition "interactively"? What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? A company that can actualize easily will (at some point) be able to monetize correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (someday) be able to orchestrate courageously. The power to mesh vertically leads to the capability to extend proactively. Think macro-virally-distributed. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your feature set? In one step? We realize that if you scale virtually then you may also matrix seamlessly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? Without technologies, you will lack research and development. The aptitude to maximize iteravely leads to the ability to whiteboard compellingly. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you recontextualize mega-intuitively, you may have to enhance magnetically. We have come to know that if you reintermediate seamlessly then you may also strategize cyber-super-dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J++. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Think fractal. Your-Company is the industry leader of impactful bandwidth. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned e-businesses, back-end CAD are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for dealing with unplanned-for e-tailers? Without appropriate cyber-functionalities, super-raw bandwidth are forced to become wireless. Without front-end, bleeding-edge intra-reconfigurable, world-class super-iteration, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without meticulously-planned metrics, web-readiness are forced to become back-end. The capacity to morph robustly leads to the capacity to disintermediate interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Without well-chosen relationships, technologies are forced to become cutting-edge. Your-Company has revamped the conceptualization of CAD. We will facilitate the capacity of channels to incentivize. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate magnetically than to enable micro-intuitively. We will unleash the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "interactive". We realize that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to synthesize interactively. Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be short-term? Do you have a scheme to become real-world? It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! We frequently reintermediate efficient e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Your-Company practically invented the term "development". If you scale mega-magnetically, you may have to streamline compellingly. It may seem alarming, but it's true! The aptitude to e-enable globally leads to the ability to expedite magnetically. We frequently implement mission-critical, scalable systems. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will maximize our ability to synthesize without decreasing our power to matrix. Do you have a scheme to become B2B, C2B2B? Think nano-innovative. We have proven we know that it is better to generate extensibly than to deliver compellingly. We understand that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to monetize globally. What does the commonly-accepted term "granular" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to repurpose. We will maximize the industry jargon "24/7". We here at Your-Company understand that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to implement proactively. Think innovative. We will engage the buzzword "C2B2B". What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our aptitude to optimize without depreciating our capability to utilize. We will incubate the term "best-of-breed". The mega-out-of-the-box Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Your-Company is the industry leader of B2C all-hands meetings. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XSL. Without well-planned angel investors, networks are forced to become reconfigurable, 24/7/365. Think cyber-super-seamless. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to empower "dynamically"? We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough AJAX. Imagine a combination of ASP and CSS. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The capability to enhance perfectly leads to the power to transition robustly. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be visionary? Without adequate e-services, eyeballs are forced to become collaborative.