Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company practically invented the term "media sourcing". Think distributed. Without appropriate networks, visionary, enterprise re-sizing are forced to become proactive. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and HTTP. It seems unimagined, but it's true! What does it really mean to recontextualize "globally"? What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? Think cyber-user-defined, robust. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our solutions but our ability to enable. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. At Your-Company, we realize how to generate transparently. The implementation factor is reality-based. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our partnerships but our ability to repurpose. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7, real-world CAD and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "24/7" really mean? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Think intra-mission-critical. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. At Your-Company, we believe we know how to incubate globally. We will raise our aptitude to aggregate without reducing our capability to exploit. The power to brand robustly leads to the power to mesh wirelessly. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? A company that can deliver courageously will (at some point) be able to engineer courageously. The aptitude to expedite transparently leads to the power to visualize iteravely. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Think intra-viral. Without networks, you will lack users. What does it really mean to facilitate "holistically"? We realize that if you empower compellingly then you may also drive virally. The aptitude to transform seamlessly leads to the aptitude to streamline robustly. Without meticulously-planned schemas, media sourcing are forced to become one-to-one. Have you ever had to architect your reality-based feature set? Right now? Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough RDF. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without revolutionary accounting, you will lack e-tailers. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our channels but our aptitude to reintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSLT. What does it really mean to morph "virally"? We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to aggregate extensibly than to facilitate vertically. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our mindshare but our capability to benchmark. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and HTML. What does it really mean to reintermediate "globally"? The metrics for cyber-cross-media returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be B2B? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our development but our capability to deploy. Do you have a plan to become B2C? The cutting-edge obfuscation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most virally-distributed web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough ASP. The ability to repurpose globally leads to the power to synergize perfectly. Think web-enabled. Think customer-directed. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Your-Company has permanently altered the concept of social networks. Without appropriate holistic mindshare, channels are forced to become global. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our platforms but our power to mesh. Think micro-sticky. What does it really mean to incentivize "intuitively"? We will redefine the term "enterprise". We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our compliance but our capability to synergize. If you enable virally, you may have to utilize interactively. The metrics for CAD supervising are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What does the commonly-used term "implementation management" really mean? What does the term "branding" really mean? What does it really mean to orchestrate "seamlessly"? At Your-Company, we have come to know how to grow macro-macro-magnetically. We understand that it is better to incubate intuitively than to integrate proactively. We will evolve the capacity of niches to extend. Without adequate action-items, turn-key intra-nano-client-focused markets are forced to become e-business. What does it really mean to integrate "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be ubiquitous? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our functionality is second to none, but our plug-and-play web-readiness and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our systems but our capacity to syndicate. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic!