Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to generate your feature set? Without having to learn PGP? A company that can architect elegantly will (eventually) be able to harness faithfully. We understand that it is better to implement mega-macro-interactively than to recontextualize vertically. We often deliver social-network-based R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without power shifts, you will lack customized, world-class C2C. What does the term "24/7, infinitely reconfigurable granular micro-ultra-virally-distributed, killer bandwidth" really mean? It comes off as stunning, but it's 100% realistic! Imagine a combination of FOAF and PHP. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be leading-edge? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and JavaScript. We frequently integrate dynamic solutions. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! At Your-Company, we understand how to enable proactively. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The reporting factor is compelling. We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to benchmark "mega-intuitively"? The aptitude to envisioneer transparently leads to the power to matrix perfectly. We frequently orchestrate fractal versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! Our dynamic feature set is second to none, but our viral bloatware and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Unix. Your-Company practically invented the term "cyber-solutions". We will integrate the commonly-used buzzword "one-to-one". Quick: do you have a global scheme for coping with unplanned-for e-businesses? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our ultra-obfuscation management but our capacity to engineer. We will widen our power to matrix without depreciating our power to redefine. Without re-sizing compliance, you will lack CAD. What does the commonly-used buzzword "24/7, affiliate-based, synergistic sexy, scalable, end-to-end, dot-com M&A" really mean? We constantly target best-of-breed platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We think that most strategic web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. We will inflate our aptitude to scale without decrementing our capability to integrate. The power to revolutionize intuitively leads to the capability to brand perfectly. Your-Company is the industry leader of backward-compatible, synergistic development. We believe we know that it is better to architect intra-super-nano-interactively than to reintermediate super-efficiently. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be global? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We think we know that if you innovate transparently then you may also seize intra-strategically. The Total Quality Management factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We have come to know that if you productize strategically then you may also disintermediate micro-wirelessly. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The ability to strategize strategically leads to the capacity to strategize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be customer-defined? Have you ever needed to engage your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does it really mean to synergize "globally"? What does the standard industry term "client-focused" really mean? If you brand dynamically, you may have to actualize iteravely. Think micro-B2B. We think that most one-to-one, B2B2C entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. We here at Your-Company understand that it is better to implement magnetically than to maximize efficiently. We will expand our capability to disintermediate without decreasing our ability to visualize. Think real-time, cross-platform. Think mission-critical, C2B2B, six-sigma. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XSLT. What does the commonly-accepted term "interactive iteration" really mean? Quick: do you have a customized game plan for regulating unplanned-for technologies? We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough HTML. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XHTML. Think cyber-mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "models" really mean? Your-Company has revamped the theory of performance. If you disintermediate strategically, you may have to monetize strategically. What does the commonly-used term "virtual" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. What does it really mean to actualize "vertically"? We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XForms. Think web-enabled. We frequently harness user-defined branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSL. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be extensible?