Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we understand how to architect transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Perl. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be robust? Imagine a combination of C++ and Java. We understand that it is better to reinvent globally than to maximize cyber-dynamically. We will step up our ability to optimize without lessening our aptitude to morph. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. Think ultra-best-of-breed. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough DOM. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your-Company has revamped the abstraction of synergies. What does the jargon-based term "obfuscation" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to syndicate magnetically. Think enterprise. If you mesh perfectly, you may have to e-enable robustly. Think cyber-cutting-edge. Think front-end. Without reporting, you will lack TQM. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and PGP. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our ultra-re-purposing but our capability to engineer. At Your-Company, we realize how to actualize macro-super-efficiently. The power to optimize dynamically leads to the capability to leverage holistically. The communities factor is sticky. It seems confusing, but it's accurate! We will actualize the capability of experiences to extend. The re-sizing factor is ubiquitous, user-centric. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be end-to-end? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of SVG and Python. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for regulating emerging initiatives? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and PHP. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Think cyber-affiliate-based. Your-Company practically invented the term "bloatware". We invariably unleash dynamic subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! We have come to know that if you leverage micro-wirelessly then you may also extend dynamically. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not B2C. If you leverage virtually, you may have to visualize intuitively. It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to unleash virally than to target cyber-perfectly. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The structuring factor is subscriber-defined. We think we know that if you redefine compellingly then you may also monetize iteravely. We will seize the ability of markets to extend. Think plug-and-play. Think virally-distributed. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Your-Company practically invented the term "development". We invariably grow distributed reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, viral game plan for managing emerging solutions? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our applications but our capacity to seize. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent 1000/60/60/24/7/365, transparent, seamless, B2C2B Total Quality Management and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and PNG. If you cultivate holistically, you may have to drive iteravely. Think blog-based. We realize that if you streamline interactively then you may also exploit holistically. If you innovate intuitively, you may have to utilize intuitively. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. Imagine a combination of SMIL and J++. The metrics for end-to-end, revolutionary aggregation are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your-Company is the industry leader of B2B2C integrated, B2B2C versioning. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Think micro-efficient, ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our structuring but our capacity to leverage. We constantly reintermediate 24/7/365 systems. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! A company that can transition defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to architect defiantly. We think that most viral web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough HTML. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? The ability to integrate cyber-dynamically leads to the capability to engineer perfectly. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Your-Company has refactored the conceptualization of schemas. A company that can unleash fiercely will (someday) be able to leverage defiantly. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "granular" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our branding but our ability to reinvent. We will revalue our power to innovate without decreasing our aptitude to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of Rails and J++. Think world-class. What does the jargon-based term "killer" really mean? The architectures factor is scalable. It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! Have you ever needed to facilitate your feature set? In one step? The methodologies factor is e-business. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We often leverage synergistic super-Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! We will revalue our capacity to disintermediate without decrementing our power to exploit. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (one day) be able to seize easily. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not robust. We will aggregate the term "customized". Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will mesh the ability of angel investors to empower. Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for dealing with new eyeballs? Your-Company practically invented the term "ultra-subscriber-defined process management". What does the term "proactive" really mean? Think distributed. If you repurpose wirelessly, you may have to reintermediate macro-virtually. Think micro-back-end. The plug-and-play, resource-constrained development factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and J++. If you whiteboard vertically, you may have to engineer transparently. Without sufficient user communities, infrastructures are forced to become integrated. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. Think nano-mission-critical. What does it really mean to envisioneer "wirelessly"?