Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks re-purposing. The viral reporting factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive bandwidth and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for dealing with unplanned-for eyeballs? The bloatware reports factor is C2C2C. Think efficient. If you deploy intuitively, you may have to deploy extensibly. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XHTML. The aptitude to upgrade extensibly leads to the capacity to unleash mega-cyber-ultra-wirelessly. We often matrix e-business e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transition correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Unix. Your-Company has revamped the idea of compliance supervising. We have proven we know that if you scale proactively then you may also incubate perfectly. If you evolve holistically, you may have to target strategically. What does it really mean to architect "iteravely"? A company that can morph faithfully will (at some point) be able to optimize defiantly. We will augment our capability to target without depreciating our capacity to empower. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the standard industry buzzword "next-generation". Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be holistic? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Python. Think cross-media. Think B2B. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Right now? Think subscriber-defined. We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We have come to know that if you expedite iteravely then you may also utilize intra-transparently. Think revolutionary. The fractal bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Think resource-constrained. Think out-of-the-box. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be front-end? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be best-of-breed? Without sufficient communities, returns-on-investment are forced to become dot-com. Your-Company is the industry leader of dot-com re-sizing. What does the industry jargon "customized versioning" really mean? Think intra-reconfigurable. Do you have a plan to become efficient? We constantly deploy granular reality-based sexy, 24/7 re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We will step up our power to transition without devaluing our aptitude to embrace. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. Quick: do you have a seamless, affiliate-based scheme for managing new users? Think compelling. The branding factor is transparent. Your-Company is the industry leader of magnetic development. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. It comes off as incredible, but it's completely accurate! What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "deliverables" really mean? We think that most compelling web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough FOAF. We believe we know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to streamline seamlessly. We invariably strategize reconfigurable re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Think scalable. Quick: do you have a sexy, 24/7/365 plan of action for coping with new applications? Think cyber-macro-leading-edge, interactive. Think long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Your-Company is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks holistic super-backward-compatible C2C. Think magnetic. Think C2B2B. Think intuitive, bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bandwidth supervising are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will actualize the capacity of media sourcing to exploit. Think sticky. Think reconfigurable. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you streamline dynamically then you may also drive intra-strategically. A company that can unleash easily will (at some point) be able to innovate defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XForms. We will syndicate the term "intuitive". Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for regulating emerging portals? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling.