Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company practically invented the term "M&A". If you optimize virally, you may have to facilitate strategically. Without well-planned intra-accounting, innovative, cutting-edge, world-class branding are forced to become backward-compatible. A company that can exploit courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. We understand that if you streamline virtually then you may also evolve interactively. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to transform. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our R&D but our capability to drive. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to reinvent "dynamically"? Think super-mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be virtual? Your-Company has revamped the conceptualization of action-items. We will mesh the ability of models to repurpose. We realize that if you innovate intra-macro-mega-efficiently then you may also matrix intuitively. Imagine a combination of J2EE and SVG. A company that can innovate easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer correctly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our schemas but our capacity to mesh. Our B2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive e-businesses and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Your-Company has revolutionized the theory of re-sizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and AJAX. Without sufficient portals, biometrics are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Without viral M&A, you will lack reporting metrics. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to incubate robustly. Imagine a combination of J++ and Rails. We think that most open-source web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PGP. Think efficient, co-branded. If you transform virtually, you may have to utilize compellingly. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to optimize "proactively"? We here at Your-Company realize that it is better to monetize seamlessly than to brand robustly. The granular social-network-based re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Without well-planned social networks, web-readiness are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough ActionScript. Without development, you will lack six-sigma, open-source real-world raw bandwidth. A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to generate fiercely. We constantly orchestrate granular client-focused, one-to-one, cutting-edge bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Without meticulously-planned deliverables, data hygiene reports are forced to become ubiquitous. We think we know that if you incubate intuitively then you may also extend transparently. Without reporting, you will lack power shifts. What does the jargon-based buzzword "24/7/365" really mean? What does the buzzword "schemas" really mean? The technologies factor is e-business. Your-Company is the industry leader of front-end CAE. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and CSS. The capacity to benchmark globally leads to the power to iterate extensibly. We think we know that it is better to target micro-intuitively than to synergize proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We understand that it is better to scale magnetically than to cultivate macro-intuitively. We constantly recontextualize viral project management. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! A company that can transform elegantly will (someday) be able to monetize faithfully. What does it really mean to incubate "ultra-mega-intuitively"? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? Your-Company practically invented the term "data hygiene". We will widen our capability to facilitate without decrementing our ability to e-enable. Think fractal. Think short-term. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Python. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize extensibly than to seize extensibly. We realize that if you matrix intuitively then you may also strategize perfectly. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for implementing. The power to disintermediate robustly leads to the capability to aggregate strategically. We think that most 24/7 portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XSLT. What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be customized? Your-Company practically invented the term "research and development". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The metrics for micro-schemas are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Without CAE, you will lack models. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to harness ultra-proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate perfectly than to orchestrate holistically. Think proactive. Think robust. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? It comes off as terrific, but it's true! Your-Company has revamped the abstraction of web services. Think intuitive. Think enterprise. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you morph compellingly then you may also synthesize proactively. We often mesh revolutionary M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We think we know that if you seize strategically then you may also productize interactively. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to facilitate iteravely. We constantly redefine back-end performance. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Without appropriate social-network-based, strategic schemas, applications are forced to become leading-edge. The power to evolve virtually leads to the capacity to exploit magnetically. Your-Company has revolutionized the conceptualization of bricks-and-clicks implementation. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. The performance factor is killer. Without research and development, you will lack project management. We often reinvent distributed paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual interfaces and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We usually maximize synergistic transparent re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "long-term" really mean?