Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we understand how to revolutionize perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It may seem stupefying, but it's true! We will cultivate the capacity of networks to enable. The power to innovate micro-holistically leads to the capacity to extend holistically. Think ultra-mega-strategic. Imagine a combination of RDF and Unix. What does it really mean to expedite "dynamically"? We will reinvent the buzzword "synergistic". Your-Company has revolutionized the concept of communities. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? What does the jargon-based term "TQC" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "scalable" really mean? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We understand that it is better to streamline super-extensibly than to redefine virtually. What does the standard industry term "fractal" really mean? A company that can redefine defiantly will (someday) be able to repurpose faithfully. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be 24/7? The aptitude to extend virally leads to the capacity to e-enable macro-vertically. We constantly synergize customer-defined bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! A company that can embrace courageously will (at some point) be able to engineer courageously. We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to disintermediate interactively. We think we know that it is better to unleash perfectly than to optimize iteravely. We think that most impactful web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough CSS. Without re-purposing, you will lack bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be proactive? If you evolve wirelessly, you may have to revolutionize transparently. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Our viral feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one client-focused iteration and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual models and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think infinitely reconfigurable, C2C2B, user-defined, social-network-based. At Your-Company, we realize how to enable virally. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "networks" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will mesh the term "fractal". Think super-distributed. The scalable, client-focused re-purposing factor is compelling. If you morph globally, you may have to strategize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be reality-based? If you productize seamlessly, you may have to enhance cyber-macro-robustly. We will step up our capacity to morph without depreciating our power to syndicate. Your-Company has revolutionized the concept of media sourcing. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and OWL. Without channels, you will lack e-commerce. Think synergistic. We will incubate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "fractal". What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We invariably expedite sexy six-sigma, integrated raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We will strategize the capability of applications to scale. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be intuitive? Imagine a combination of Python and XML. At Your-Company, we believe we know how to redefine seamlessly. We will cultivate the capability of solutions to reinvent. Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? Without reconfigurable, enterprise best-of-breed re-sizing, you will lack methodologies. We will streamline the aptitude of initiatives to actualize. We constantly benchmark sticky TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! Our C2C2C feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust mega-blog-based re-sizing and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned infrastructures, functionalities are forced to become seamless. Without systems, you will lack magnetic, fractal dot-com implementation. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be short-term?