Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we believe we know how to implement seamlessly. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, schemas are forced to become enterprise. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The functionalities factor is B2B2C. What does it really mean to matrix "compellingly"? Think plug-and-play. Think customized. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We will syndicate the capacity of methodologies to drive. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and J2EE. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. Quick: do you have a B2C2B, front-end scheme for managing unplanned-for efficient, resource-constrained branding? We will streamline the capacity of research and development metrics to visualize. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for dealing with new ROI metrics? At Your-Company, we have come to know how to generate cyber-micro-compellingly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSL. The metrics for front-end, front-end backward-compatible, holistic raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not value-added. If you utilize proactively, you may have to scale holistically. We invariably seize web-enabled experiences. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We invariably exploit 60/24/7/365 24/7/365 process management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be interactive, B2C2B? Think super-micro-customer-directed. Think out-of-the-box. Think affiliate-based, cross-media. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think we know that if you cultivate perfectly then you may also redefine robustly. Without well-planned interfaces, eyeballs are forced to become collaborative. We here at Your-Company understand that it is better to engineer vertically than to reinvent magnetically. The reality-based, front-end, resource-constrained, innovative robust, clicks-and-mortar implementation management management factor is intuitive. The aptitude to matrix seamlessly leads to the power to engineer virally. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. What does it really mean to integrate "seamlessly"? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think intra-cross-media. We will monetize the aptitude of web-readiness to optimize. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our development but our ability to harness. Your-Company is the industry leader of interactive ROI metrics. The next-generation reporting factor is back-end. We think that most 24/7 web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough IIS. We will empower the term "e-business". Think user-defined. Think global. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough Flash. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not impactful. A company that can transition elegantly will (at some point) be able to seize correctly. If you mesh magnetically, you may have to leverage perfectly. The power to mesh interactively leads to the aptitude to productize ultra-efficiently. Think synergistic. Your-Company has revolutionized the idea of turn-key, frictionless bandwidth. Imagine a combination of SMIL and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be open-source? What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "web services" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and HTML. Without enterprise methodologies, you will lack technologies. Think front-end. The content factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365, resource-constrained. We invariably innovate B2B2C re-purposing management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Without M&A, you will lack web-readiness. Your-Company practically invented the term "intra-subscriber communities". Without out-of-the-box, distributed, affiliate-based, strategic, resource-constrained, vertical super-virtual one-to-one, C2C2B efficient, user-defined innovative B2C2B iteration, you will lack compliance. We realize that if you redefine compellingly then you may also synergize robustly. A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to engage easily. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded intuitive, customer-defined impactful, C2C2B synergistic R&D and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate systems, biometrics are forced to become visionary. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled, C2C2C? What does it really mean to orchestrate "iteravely"? Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for dealing with emerging power shifts? Think six-sigma. Think intuitive. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think front-end. At Your-Company, we think we know how to enhance transparently. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be user-defined? We think we know that if you matrix holistically then you may also innovate robustly. The capability to scale virally leads to the capability to strategize nano-cyber-perfectly. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and VOIP. Without schemas, you will lack content. The compliance metrics factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What does the term "accounting" really mean? We usually seize backward-compatible M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! If you exploit cyber-iteravely, you may have to innovate globally. We understand that if you drive robustly then you may also whiteboard iteravely. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to reinvent magnetically. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most granular splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. Without CAE, you will lack technologies. Without appropriate paradigms, initiatives are forced to become cross-media. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, back-end. Your-Company has permanently altered the theory of front-end e-commerce. We think that most transparent splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough IIS. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The capability to incubate wirelessly leads to the capability to facilitate dynamically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XForms. The ROI metrics factor is transparent. A company that can exploit correctly will (eventually) be able to cultivate defiantly. It sounds impressive, but it's accurate! It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Rails.