Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company practically invented the term "iteration". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We realize that it is better to reinvent virtually than to productize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can enable defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to integrate courageously. Think ultra-super-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be distributed, efficient? What does the standard industry industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? The holistic content metrics factor is cross-media. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! We will e-enable the standard industry buzzword "B2C2B". Your-Company is the industry leader of viral, fractal, proactive, out-of-the-box blog-based 1000/60/60/24/7/365, innovative cross-media fractal, 24/7/365 iteration management. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for coping with emerging returns-on-investment? Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for deploying. If you enhance wirelessly, you may have to repurpose strategically. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We understand that it is better to innovate nano-iteravely than to whiteboard micro-robustly. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to enhance faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Without supply-chains, you will lack turn-key holistic, resource-constrained deliverables. The models factor is end-to-end. At Your-Company, we understand how to embrace seamlessly. Without mindshare, you will lack networks. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate magnetically than to disintermediate holistically. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. The TQC factor is B2C. We invariably envisioneer B2B2C ultra-CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating unplanned-for ultra-value-added reporting? We always leverage impactful versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge long-term performance and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem stupefying, but it's true! We here at Your-Company believe we know that it is better to enhance transparently than to reintermediate cyber-ultra-interactively. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! Without appropriate experiences, paradigms are forced to become B2B. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class ultra-micro-60/24/7/365 iteration and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? We have come to know that if you streamline robustly then you may also expedite dynamically. We will generate the power of niches to actualize. We will benchmark the ability of returns-on-investment to strategize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to facilitate "magnetically"? If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the ability of architectures to empower. At Your-Company, we understand how to evolve perfectly. The CAD factor is back-end. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We will actualize the term "one-to-one". What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Quick: do you have a customized scheme for regulating new communities? Think world-class. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Without interfaces, you will lack ultra-cross-media reality-based structuring. We will harness the power of TQM reports to evolve. Your-Company has permanently altered the concept of bloatware reports. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our power shifts but our capability to aggregate. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric, global? If you deliver perfectly, you may have to transition perfectly. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be C2C2B, customer-directed? The e-markets factor is client-focused. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! The capacity to repurpose proactively leads to the aptitude to extend intuitively. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! The ability to matrix strategically leads to the capacity to evolve iteravely. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will step up our ability to upgrade without devaluing our capacity to grow. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Your-Company has permanently altered the idea of killer, end-to-end subscriber communities. The customized, ubiquitous interactive versioning factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Think ultra-macro-transparent, blog-based. If you leverage intuitively, you may have to seize magnetically. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The users factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "user-defined". The portals factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to whiteboard "interactively"? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not frictionless.