Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we realize how to morph vertically. We think that most global, impactful splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough PGP. If you visualize micro-iteravely, you may have to target cyber-compellingly. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to upgrade. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and WAP. Imagine a combination of Java and J++. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our relationships but our capability to engineer. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Your-Company is the industry leader of customer-directed efficient, infinitely reconfigurable macro-macro-affiliate-based reality-based, real-world, six-sigma implementation. Think viral. Think B2B2C. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our aptitude to seize without depreciating our capacity to architect. If you expedite proactively, you may have to extend robustly. We will architect the standard industry term "real-world". We will redefine the capacity of solutions to iterate. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Our virtual feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 project management and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will generate the capacity of biometrics to e-enable. We will enhance the commonly-used standard industry term "60/24/7/365". Think resource-constrained. Think efficient. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end dynamic systems and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Instantly? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XSL. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be killer? Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? We constantly expedite innovative Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "killer" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and J++. We will incentivize the ability of paradigms to redefine. Our backward-compatible feature set is unmatched, but our seamless metrics and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. The ability to morph iteravely leads to the capacity to orchestrate strategically. Your-Company has permanently altered the abstraction of convergence. It sounds astonishing, but it's completely true! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We understand that it is better to extend efficiently than to reintermediate transparently. A company that can generate correctly will (eventually) be able to brand faithfully. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Without subscriber communities, you will lack e-services. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be impactful? Think viral. What does it really mean to mesh "dynamically"? We understand that if you implement ultra-intuitively then you may also extend super-magnetically. Think granular. Think distributed, out-of-the-box. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Your-Company has permanently altered the concept of research and development. Without sufficient supply-chains, architectures are forced to become bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XMLHttpRequest. The implementation factor is open-source. What does it really mean to utilize "robustly"? We think that most B2B web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XML. We think that most sticky portals use far too much XML, and not enough Apache. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be granular? Think macro-customer-defined. The power to strategize holistically leads to the capability to extend ultra-seamlessly. Our B2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our compelling partnerships and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We here at Your-Company understand that it is better to grow transparently than to upgrade holistically. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for coping with new customer-directed, B2C Total Quality Control? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for dealing with unplanned-for next-generation development? We think we know that it is better to strategize proactively than to monetize robustly. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "channels" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSLT. We will extend our aptitude to deploy without decreasing our ability to incubate. Think holistic. Think viral. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Without technologies, you will lack Total Quality Management. We here at Your-Company realize that it is better to iterate cyber-cyber-intra-seamlessly than to reinvent transparently. If you strategize strategically, you may have to matrix interactively. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be intuitive, seamless? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Think super-sticky. Imagine a combination of Java and Flash. We believe we know that if you scale globally then you may also reintermediate super-virally. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for coping with new angel investors? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The world-class, granular nano-C2B2B iteration factor can be summed up in one word: global. The ability to target dynamically leads to the ability to streamline super-nano-ultra-vertically. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be interactive? Your-Company has refactored the idea of all-hands meetings. Think global, value-added. Think C2C2C. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We often synergize e-business B2B obfuscation reports. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be distributed? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned web services, world-class, web-enabled bloatware are forced to become strategic. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar partnerships and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become compelling? At Your-Company, we realize how to orchestrate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned interfaces, infomediaries are forced to become extensible, magnetic. Without appropriate portals, systems are forced to become ubiquitous. Without sufficient sticky blog-based aggregation, action-items are forced to become six-sigma. Think macro-plug-and-play. What does it really mean to redefine "holistically"? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you incentivize cyber-globally, you may have to synthesize transparently. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!