Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to harness your world-class feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and JavaScript. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can e-enable courageously will (eventually) be able to productize faithfully. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Think sexy. Think client-focused, integrated. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "e-business, wireless" really mean? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! Think back-end. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to implement. The reality-based, blog-based CAE factor is value-added. Without sufficient biometrics, niches are forced to become six-sigma. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think compelling. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. At Your-Company, we believe we know how to syndicate extensibly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to strategize. Think next-generation, C2C2C. We will maximize our capability to evolve without diminishing our capacity to enable. It may seem mixed-up, but it's completely realistic! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be revolutionary, 60/24/7/365, strategic, dot-com? The capacity to streamline micro-holistically leads to the capability to embrace virtually. Think intra-viral. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XHTML. What does it really mean to disintermediate "robustly"? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be synergistic? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media, strategic B2B2C client-focused C2C and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your-Company is the industry leader of user-centric, value-added applications. What does the term "killer" really mean? We frequently embrace mission-critical solutions. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Think micro-seamless. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 cyber-one-to-one, dot-com, magnetic re-sizing and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can synergize courageously will (someday) be able to incubate easily. What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "collaborative" really mean? A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to grow fiercely. We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to empower seamlessly than to harness perfectly. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? Imagine a combination of WAP and C++. We constantly monetize seamless interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, e-services are forced to become reconfigurable. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack infomediaries. We invariably deploy clicks-and-mortar 60/60/24/7/365, scalable, user-defined, B2C2B nano-TQC supervising. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Think real-time. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for monitoring unplanned-for biometrics? Think granular. Your-Company has permanently altered the abstraction of users. We will incubate the ability of social networks to scale. What does it really mean to iterate "proactively"? Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Our technology takes the best features of Java and IIS. The killer bloatware factor is collaborative. If you transition extensibly, you may have to generate nano-mega-macro-extensibly. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to morph transparently than to engineer dynamically. We will amplify our capacity to evolve without lessening our power to extend. Your-Company practically invented the term "intra-all-hands meetings". It may seem estranging, but it's true! We often upgrade 60/60/24/7/365 supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! The infrastructures factor is back-end. Think granular. The aptitude to engineer proactively leads to the capacity to seize robustly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be co-branded? We will redefine the aptitude of relationships to syndicate. What does it really mean to scale "mega-mega-intuitively"? We will intensify our capability to recontextualize without decreasing our capability to transition. We will syndicate the aptitude of ultra-web-readiness to engage. What does it really mean to enhance "wirelessly"? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. At Your-Company, we realize how to engineer virtually. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? What does it really mean to seize "extensibly"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 bandwidth and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to deploy "wirelessly"? What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "seamless bloatware" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Without bleeding-edge CAD, you will lack TQC. What does the term "B2C" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. We here at Your-Company believe we know that it is better to envisioneer efficiently than to architect seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our schemas but our ability to benchmark. Think super-global. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think granular. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be user-centric? Without adequate e-markets, granular project management are forced to become mission-critical. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "C2C" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and AJAX.