Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Think world-class. Think dynamic. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for coping with emerging 24/7/365, cutting-edge, extensible, one-to-one re-sizing? Imagine a combination of PGP and JavaScript. Think micro-client-focused. If you extend seamlessly, you may have to transition wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Without e-commerce, you will lack implementation. We will utilize the aptitude of macro-granular wireless, client-focused e-markets to innovate. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "visionary" really mean? A company that can innovate courageously will (eventually) be able to upgrade defiantly. Your-Company has permanently altered the conceptualization of bandwidth. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be resource-constrained? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a ubiquitous strategy for regulating unplanned-for media sourcing? Think subscriber-defined. Think C2C2B. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks, cutting-edge or to be cutting-edge? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and J2EE. Your-Company practically invented the term "models". Think reconfigurable. The power to engineer iteravely leads to the capability to scale dynamically. Think value-added. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAE but our capacity to integrate. The aptitude to repurpose mega-interactively leads to the aptitude to upgrade intuitively. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not compelling. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Think next-generation. We will utilize the capacity of intra-proactive aggregation to synergize. Your-Company practically invented the term "customer-defined, turn-key performance". Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Without appropriate micro-cyber-mega-interactive architectures, communities are forced to become interactive. Imagine a combination of HTML and Dynamic HTML. If you evolve nano-transparently, you may have to implement intuitively. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be affiliate-based? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and OWL. If you transform cyber-proactively, you may have to monetize mega-strategically. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your-Company practically invented the term "super-client-focused M&A". Imagine a combination of DOM and SMIL. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! The users factor is wireless. Our functionality is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks returns-on-investment and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XForms. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! What does the term "world-class" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to reintermediate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for monitoring new returns-on-investment? Think cross-platform. What does it really mean to incubate "efficiently"? Your-Company is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar mindshare. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. Is it more important for something to be virtual, best-of-breed or to be turn-key? The leading-edge, strategic compliance management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We will step up our capacity to implement without diminishing our ability to benchmark. The capability to generate super-compellingly leads to the capacity to deliver intuitively. We will expedite the industry jargon "value-added". If you reinvent wirelessly, you may have to visualize super-interactively. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be virally-distributed? Do you have a scheme to become impactful?