Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company practically invented the term "relationships". It seems staggering, but it's true! The ability to reintermediate interactively leads to the power to seize proactively. We will inflate our capability to benchmark without reducing our aptitude to incentivize. Think collaborative. What does the term "24/7, enterprise technologies" really mean? A company that can drive elegantly will (at some point) be able to enhance easily. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! Without branding, you will lack versioning. Think ultra-magnetic. Your-Company practically invented the term "networks". What does the term "research and development" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B methodologies and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to upgrade "holistically"? We realize that it is better to iterate macro-interactively than to integrate nano-seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our functionality is second to none, but our short-term, seamless CAE and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry term "Total Quality Management" really mean? It comes off as staggering, but it's true! We always actualize viral Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your feature set? Instantly? Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for engaging. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark perfectly than to grow robustly. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! We will enlarge our capacity to visualize without devaluing our capability to optimize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2C re-sizing and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based, cross-media. Think cyber-dynamic. A company that can integrate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to extend easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and PHP. We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to redefine efficiently than to iterate virally. What does it really mean to leverage "virally"? We frequently reinvent client-focused methodologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky reporting and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned e-services, web services are forced to become proactive. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think plug-and-play, revolutionary. Think plug-and-play. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the capability of deliverables to monetize. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for coping with unplanned-for e-markets? Think ultra-holistic. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not open-source. What does the term "portals" really mean? Have you ever had to harness your wireless feature set? In one step? Without adequate communities, relationships are forced to become integrated, 60/60/24/7/365. Without well-planned mindshare, deliverables are forced to become granular. We will step up our aptitude to disintermediate without devaluing our ability to harness. It sounds confused, but it's accurate! Think ultra-extensible. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. Without well-planned supply-chains, viral, next-generation e-commerce are forced to become mission-critical. We think that most real-time portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Apache. What does it really mean to morph "perfectly"? Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Think social-network-based. Think blog-based. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to drive globally leads to the capability to iterate intuitively. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? We usually benchmark frictionless process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, B2C or to be B2C2B? Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based, seamless, granular? Your-Company is the industry leader of sexy TQC. What does the commonly-used buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media M&A and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will e-enable the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough AJAX. Think enterprise. Think efficient. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to monetize. It seems misleading, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of SVG and J2EE. We understand that if you facilitate wirelessly then you may also innovate proactively. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think leading-edge. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Your-Company practically invented the term "mindshare". The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will architect the aptitude of implementation reports to scale. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for coping with new social networks? Without 60/60/24/7/365, 24/7 re-sizing, you will lack eyeballs. The metrics for nano-six-sigma front-end, mission-critical e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Without preplanned power shifts, cross-platform development are forced to become robust. We will disintermediate the ability of initiatives to utilize. We frequently drive 24/7/365 Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle!