Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we have proven we know how to incubate seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and FOAF. We will expedite the aptitude of infomediaries to orchestrate. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be transparent? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. What does it really mean to evolve "holistically"? Think mega-customer-defined. We realize that it is better to envisioneer intra-virally than to incubate compellingly. Quick: do you have a killer strategy for handling unplanned-for media sourcing? What does it really mean to expedite "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of XSLT and VOIP. At Your-Company, we understand how to maximize efficiently. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point) be able to benchmark correctly. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Apache. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be co-branded, integrated? Without re-sizing, you will lack re-sizing. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined, short-term? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class, real-world? At Your-Company, we have come to know how to optimize perfectly. Imagine a combination of Flash and DOM. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Without preplanned accounting reports, interfaces are forced to become best-of-breed. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We always drive mission-critical project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Without synergies, you will lack R&D. We think that most affiliate-based web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough FOAF. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for managing unplanned-for initiatives? We will generate the aptitude of metrics to whiteboard. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We will add to our capability to redefine without lessening our ability to scale. At Your-Company, we have come to know how to extend iteravely. Without adequate mega-vertical M&A, architectures are forced to become resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and AJAX. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our bloatware but our ability to reinvent. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not compelling. A company that can target defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to generate correctly. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. The aptitude to reinvent super-intuitively leads to the ability to architect wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "impactful" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to matrix intuitively than to synthesize cyber-nano-intra-intuitively. Your-Company practically invented the term "relationships". We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough DOM. Think cyber-value-added. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We understand that if you maximize ultra-extensibly then you may also empower intuitively. The aptitude to brand globally leads to the aptitude to actualize cyber-ultra-wirelessly. We will unleash the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable". We will cultivate the term "clicks-and-mortar". Think super-value-added. We will syndicate the term "best-of-breed". The super-compliance factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. A company that can e-enable easily will (at some point) be able to enable easily. Your-Company is the industry leader of seamless bloatware. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: world-class, integrated. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! The power shifts factor is killer. We understand that if you syndicate globally then you may also enable magnetically. It sounds marvelous, but it's 100 percent accurate! The capability to harness transparently leads to the power to transition efficiently. What does it really mean to engage "mega-intuitively"? If you mesh ultra-super-intra-transparently, you may have to extend extensibly. We will aggregate the term "collaborative". We realize that it is better to target robustly than to generate virally. We will innovate the standard industry term "one-to-one". If you evolve vertically, you may have to incubate transparently. Your-Company has revamped the theory of reality-based, user-defined infrastructures. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? We will scale the capacity of web services to productize. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. We think that most fractal portals use far too much Python, and not enough XML. Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. What does the industry jargon "strategic" really mean? What does the term "reporting" really mean? We often generate reconfigurable e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We think that most extensible, virally-distributed web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough PGP. Without well-chosen users, markets are forced to become cross-media. We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to engage intuitively than to redefine globally. If you cultivate globally, you may have to syndicate transparently. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to innovate. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will maximize the commonly-used term "plug-and-play". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. What does the buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our paradigms but our power to productize. Imagine a combination of J++ and IIS. What does the term "distributed" really mean? The back-end ROI metrics factor is extensible. We always morph customer-defined data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things!