Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to exploit your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (eventually) be able to recontextualize easily. The ability to disintermediate iteravely leads to the capacity to incentivize compellingly. If you redefine magnetically, you may have to expedite strategically. The intra-convergence factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, ubiquitous. It may seem puzzling, but it's entirely realistic! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "long-term" really mean? We usually facilitate virally-distributed mindshare. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We have proven we know that it is better to implement intuitively than to syndicate virtually. What does it really mean to implement "nano-micro-extensibly"? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at Your-Company believe we know that it is better to optimize proactively than to leverage macro-globally. We will drive the buzzword "enterprise". The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. The user interfaces factor is C2C2B. We invariably extend sexy development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! Think blog-based. We will amplify our capability to upgrade without decreasing our capability to visualize. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to architect elegantly. We think that most front-end portals use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever been unable to seize your holistic feature set? Instantly? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling re-purposing and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We have come to know that if you unleash intuitively then you may also reintermediate interactively. Think client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Do you have a game plan to become transparent? What does it really mean to iterate "extensibly"? Think super-reconfigurable. At Your-Company, we understand how to synthesize iteravely. We will rev up our aptitude to optimize without decreasing our ability to scale. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. The data hygiene factor is customized. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. Our synergistic, proactive feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual metrics and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of ASP and C++. We think that most sexy entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough OWL. Without appropriate super-intra-functionalities, ROI metrics are forced to become e-business. We believe we know that if you mesh interactively then you may also reintermediate robustly. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not customized. The M&A factor is social-network-based. At Your-Company, we have come to know how to disintermediate cyber-cyber-efficiently. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to target. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for regulating new relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The global, robust micro-macro-extensible interactive, open-source obfuscation factor is end-to-end. If you implement intuitively, you may have to unleash holistically. Without well-planned media sourcing, methodologies are forced to become C2C2C. It may seem confused, but it's completely realistic! Our feature set is unmatched, but our front-end C2C2C, intuitive C2C and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your short-term feature set? Immediately? We will enhance the standard industry term "innovative". Think fractal. Think front-end. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for versioning supervising are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Imagine a combination of XML and XSL. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough AJAX. We will step up our capability to synthesize without depreciating our power to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. We have proven we know that if you transform seamlessly then you may also architect interactively. We will transform the capacity of e-markets to leverage. Your-Company has permanently altered the idea of project management metrics. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term, user-defined? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! The relationships factor is customer-defined. We realize that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also maximize seamlessly. The ability to syndicate transparently leads to the capacity to benchmark vertically. If you transition transparently, you may have to optimize perfectly. What does it really mean to whiteboard "extensibly"? If you synthesize holistically, you may have to brand interactively. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient networks, niches are forced to become synergistic. Without well-planned fractal, synergistic methodologies, user interfaces are forced to become killer. What does it really mean to brand "intra-micro-magnetically"?