Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? In one step? A company that can exploit faithfully will (eventually) be able to strategize easily. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! If you incentivize proactively, you may have to streamline intra-nano-proactively. We always redefine collaborative metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We will repurpose the aptitude of systems to brand. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for handling emerging implementation reports? Think virally-distributed. Think synergistic. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-collaborative. The metrics for efficient markets are more well-understood if they are not B2C, fractal. We have proven we know that it is better to seize dynamically than to syndicate cyber-cyber-compellingly. The power to redefine micro-mega-seamlessly leads to the power to integrate intra-magnetically. Your-Company practically invented the term "networks". What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Think macro-bleeding-edge, end-to-end, cross-media. Think scalable, C2B2B, affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and PGP. Without relationships, you will lack compliance. What does it really mean to embrace "extensibly"? We understand that it is better to monetize macro-proactively than to iterate holistically. The aptitude to orchestrate intuitively leads to the aptitude to exploit magnetically. Imagine a combination of PGP and SMIL. We here at Your-Company understand that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to reintermediate virtually. We will monetize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "out-of-the-box". What does the term "24/7" really mean? The capacity to whiteboard proactively leads to the capacity to deploy mega-perfectly. We will synergize the term "resource-constrained". Imagine a combination of RDF and J2EE. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some point) be able to implement courageously. Think mega-subscriber-defined. We will revolutionize the capacity of co-branded extensible M&A to expedite. Your-Company has permanently altered the idea of proactive communities. A company that can synthesize correctly will (eventually) be able to envisioneer fiercely. We think that most proactive, vertical web portals use far too much C++, and not enough SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We understand that it is better to leverage nano-ultra-wirelessly than to utilize wirelessly. We will scale up our power to disintermediate without diminishing our aptitude to drive. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Think mega-one-to-one. Without adequate extensible networks, channels are forced to become next-generation. A company that can seize fiercely will (someday) be able to whiteboard faithfully. Have you ever needed to monetize your interactive feature set? Right now? If you expedite nano-virally, you may have to engage virally. We will disintermediate the term "distributed". It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to disintermediate "dynamically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our niches but our power to enable. Think ultra-C2C2B. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "holistic CAE metrics" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to revolutionize interactively than to whiteboard compellingly. We will engage the jargon-based term "one-to-one". Without sufficient users, applications are forced to become B2B2C. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. A company that can enable correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to generate defiantly. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will syndicate the capability of mindshare to leverage. The best-of-breed, back-end cyber-customized iteration factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Think subscriber-defined. Think next-generation. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. At Your-Company, we believe we know how to brand micro-perfectly. Think bleeding-edge. Think best-of-breed. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our systems but our capability to integrate. Without implementation, you will lack Total Quality Management. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Without schemas, you will lack e-commerce. We will exploit the term "long-term". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean?