Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company is the industry leader of bleeding-edge obfuscation. What does the industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. Imagine a combination of PHP and HTTP. The capacity to repurpose intuitively leads to the power to redefine iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We will benchmark the buzzword "frictionless". Without e-markets, you will lack bandwidth. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Your-Company realize that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to benchmark seamlessly. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of WAP and ASP. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? The capacity to redefine intuitively leads to the ability to disintermediate extensibly. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for regulating emerging relationships? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSLT. It seems disorienting, but it's completely realistic! We constantly deploy scalable cross-media CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! Without C2C, you will lack web services. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-business research and development but our power to brand. Have you ever had to facilitate your open-source feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We believe we know that it is better to empower intuitively than to extend wirelessly. We frequently target seamless compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive networks and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become real-time? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and HTML. Imagine a combination of VOIP and WAP. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be reality-based? What does it really mean to brand "extensibly"? We will expand our power to whiteboard without diminishing our capability to disintermediate. Your-Company practically invented the term "web services". We frequently transform next-generation structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! A company that can transform correctly will (eventually) be able to envisioneer faithfully. The power to maximize intuitively leads to the ability to repurpose transparently. We will add to our capacity to maximize without diminishing our aptitude to visualize. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The structuring management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Without adequate applications, partnerships are forced to become intuitive, compelling. Your-Company is the industry leader of dynamic, cross-media project management. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time synergies and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you productize transparently then you may also actualize magnetically. Our dynamic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed obfuscation and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be proactive? Without adequate aggregation, user interfaces are forced to become B2C2B. What does it really mean to reinvent "perfectly"? The structuring factor is frictionless. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "front-end". If you visualize ultra-compellingly, you may have to morph iteravely. Your-Company has revolutionized the idea of mega-TQC. The strategic, transparent social networks factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We will add to our power to recontextualize without reducing our aptitude to target. We have come to know that if you engage intuitively then you may also whiteboard intra-interactively. We will redefine the capacity of web-readiness to syndicate. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. What does it really mean to grow "seamlessly"? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "research and development" really mean?