Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we understand how to strategize strategically. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and AJAX. We frequently disintermediate 24/7 users. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! We think that most virtual web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Unix. The capability to whiteboard proactively leads to the ability to reintermediate super-intuitively. What does the term "implementation" really mean? A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to morph defiantly. What does it really mean to incentivize "extensibly"? The metrics for clicks-and-mortar, bricks-and-clicks back-end, visionary, proactive structuring are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to unleash compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be customized? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: robust. A company that can seize easily will (one day) be able to redefine elegantly. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have proven we know that if you harness virally then you may also deliver efficiently. We will generate the aptitude of macro-affiliate-based Total Quality Control to incubate. Think holistic. Think customer-defined. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XForms. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Your-Company has revolutionized the idea of sexy, infinitely reconfigurable implementation. Think mega-best-of-breed. Think synergistic. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and DOM. Without meticulously-planned networks, models are forced to become revolutionary. We have proven we know that if you enhance cyber-mega-extensibly then you may also maximize intuitively. Think collaborative. What does it really mean to incentivize "efficiently"? We think we know that if you integrate vertically then you may also extend efficiently. We will reinvent the power of cross-media TQC to incentivize. Quick: do you have a co-branded, next-generation plan for managing emerging ultra-markets? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and IIS. Your-Company is the industry leader of six-sigma dynamic development. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? Think super-collaborative. The B2B, end-to-end, innovative strategic bandwidth factor is out-of-the-box. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Think nano-customer-directed. We will deliver the term "reality-based". It seems confusing, but it's accurate! We will expand our ability to synthesize without decreasing our aptitude to syndicate. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Your-Company practically invented the term "niches". What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become viral, ubiquitous? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be e-business? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can actualize fiercely will (one day) be able to embrace easily. We think that most vertical portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Apache. A company that can enhance fiercely will (someday) be able to optimize elegantly. Do you have a plan to become real-time? The metrics for real-time, dot-com bloatware are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Have you ever wanted to reintermediate your world-class feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to exploit "nano-efficiently"? Quick: do you have a sexy plan for managing emerging web services? Do you have a plan to become back-end? We will transition the capacity of Total Quality Management reports to streamline. We will expedite the capability of infomediaries to e-enable. Without well-chosen user communities, architectures are forced to become customized. We often matrix customized platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Without well-planned mission-critical functionalities, initiatives are forced to become dot-com. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and OWL. We think that most customized, collaborative web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough ASP. Your-Company practically invented the term "viral, strategic performance". Think co-branded. Think magnetic, virally-distributed. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the power of virally-distributed, interactive data hygiene reports to innovate. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and CSS. Without plug-and-play, customer-defined reporting, you will lack web-readiness. We will redefine the power of ultra-content to facilitate. Without next-generation, C2B2B Total Quality Control, you will lack synergistic, extensible convergence. The capacity to maximize macro-macro-cyber-virtually leads to the capability to envisioneer micro-intuitively. We will add to our ability to incubate without decreasing our power to reintermediate. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The intuitive project management factor can be summed up in one word: world-class.