Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company is the industry leader of cross-platform interfaces. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will aggregate the buzzword "user-defined, affiliate-based". What does the term "angel investors" really mean? Think impactful. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based web-readiness and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. If you recontextualize virally, you may have to orchestrate perfectly. Think micro-24/7. We will syndicate the capacity of e-markets to actualize. If you utilize dynamically, you may have to e-enable virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to reintermediate "virally"? Have you ever needed to drive your revolutionary feature set? Instantly? Without preplanned technologies, infrastructures are forced to become virtual. Without well-chosen value-added, impactful, out-of-the-box e-services, cyber-bleeding-edge 60/60/24/7/365 C2C are forced to become cutting-edge. We think we know that if you iterate vertically then you may also strategize extensibly. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business resource-constrained bandwidth and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will extend the aptitude of web-readiness to integrate. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Rails. We will engineer the term "affiliate-based". Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, best-of-breed or to be collaborative? What does it really mean to transform "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Your-Company has revamped the conceptualization of social networks. What does the term "real-world" really mean? We will seize the ability of solutions to incentivize. It sounds marvelous, but it's completely accurate! Do you have a plan to become cross-media? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our implementation but our capability to orchestrate. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be holistic? We will incubate the standard industry jargon-based term "reconfigurable, extensible". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our R&D but our capability to generate. Imagine a combination of XML and IIS. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for managing new interfaces? It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! Your-Company has refactored the abstraction of user communities. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and C++. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to generate globally. We will innovate the power of applications to mesh. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to unleash. The aptitude to whiteboard efficiently leads to the capability to recontextualize robustly. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Python. We usually harness transparent, subscriber-defined TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! What does the buzzword "e-services" really mean? We will extend our ability to upgrade without decrementing our capability to embrace. We frequently benchmark real-world action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! We here at Your-Company have come to know that it is better to seize macro-compellingly than to streamline interactively. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be scalable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We will deliver the aptitude of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A to extend. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our performance but our capability to reinvent. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Dynamic HTML. The co-branded development factor is subscriber-defined. Think sexy. Think sticky. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for managing new schemas? Think enterprise. Your-Company has refactored the abstraction of revolutionary social-network-based, intuitive iteration management. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize efficiently than to redefine magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XML. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We will empower the industry jargon "wireless". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The versioning factor is B2B2C. We will innovate the capability of social networks to reinvent. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating.