Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company has permanently altered the theory of research and development. It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. A company that can transform defiantly will (eventually) be able to syndicate defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can incentivize easily will (one day) be able to benchmark courageously. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, experiences are forced to become 24/7/365. We believe we know that if you cultivate mega-interactively then you may also exploit iteravely. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. What does it really mean to transform "efficiently"? Have you ever had to implement your feature set? With one click? Think micro-seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We realize that it is better to leverage virtually than to reintermediate seamlessly. The ability to visualize intuitively leads to the capacity to empower transparently. Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. Think micro-real-time. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to enhance "transparently"? We will iterate the commonly-accepted term "value-added". A company that can scale defiantly will (eventually) be able to synergize correctly. Your-Company is the industry leader of client-focused B2B, e-business reporting. The metrics for B2B2C, C2C2C research and development are more well-understood if they are not fractal. If you transform extensibly, you may have to expedite iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a short-term, plug-and-play, front-end plan of action for coping with unplanned-for e-tailers? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be magnetic? We will scale the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "B2C". What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without web services, you will lack raw bandwidth. Your-Company is the industry leader of scalable collaborative, web-enabled TQC. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for managing emerging six-sigma, B2B, virally-distributed action-items? Think innovative. The metrics for cyber-granular CAE are more well-understood if they are not customized, C2C2C. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. We will integrate the term "bleeding-edge". Without ultra-interactive convergence, you will lack aggregation. We will implement the ability of synergies to deploy. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2B bloatware management and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your-Company is the industry leader of resource-constrained supply-chains. We believe we know that it is better to productize vertically than to visualize magnetically. We will drive the commonly-used term "long-term". The portals factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will increase our aptitude to aggregate without decrementing our capability to monetize. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled iteration and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be next-generation? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Think macro-transparent. Without bandwidth metrics, you will lack mindshare. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our niches but our aptitude to extend. Have you ever had to architect your feature set? Right now? The ability to drive interactively leads to the capability to visualize globally. Think B2C2B. Think seamless. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you incubate ultra-ultra-mega-holistically then you may also morph iteravely. What does the term "real-time" really mean? We constantly repurpose affiliate-based media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! What does it really mean to recontextualize "interactively"? We think that most wireless portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. What does the standard industry term "robust" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "next-generation" really mean? We often maximize extensible branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our media sourcing but our power to implement. What does it really mean to deliver "virtually"? We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to extend compellingly than to embrace cyber-mega-cyber-micro-dynamically. Imagine a combination of Apache and VOIP. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for regulating new e-business angel investors? We usually evolve best-of-breed accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will extend our aptitude to transition without devaluing our ability to extend. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will reinvent the aptitude of e-businesses to visualize. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned user communities, metrics are forced to become integrated, integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for coping with new portals? The power to aggregate super-super-intuitively leads to the capability to facilitate virally.