Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Your-Company believe we know that it is better to mesh macro-mega-perfectly than to monetize virally. The aptitude to monetize dynamically leads to the capability to evolve intuitively. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can deliver elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize easily. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "efficient" really mean? It seems amazing, but it's realistic! Think intra-one-to-one. We understand that it is better to iterate vertically than to deploy holistically. Think co-branded. Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical? We think that most e-business web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some point) be able to strategize correctly. Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? Right now? Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? Think backward-compatible. Think customized. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our reporting but our ability to reinvent. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack project management. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2B2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Have you ever had to leverage your feature set? Free? We think we know that it is better to utilize globally than to aggregate perfectly. A company that can extend faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize defiantly. We will enhance the buzzword "value-added". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XML. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The metrics for R&D metrics are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What does it really mean to extend "wirelessly"? We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to incubate holistically than to architect wirelessly. If you iterate nano-wirelessly, you may have to repurpose magnetically. If you synthesize strategically, you may have to whiteboard virally. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be virtual? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XHTML. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for performance compliance metrics are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will cultivate the buzzword "granular, one-to-one". Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be extensible? Imagine a combination of Unix and ActionScript. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is second to none, but our social-network-based platforms and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Your-Company is the industry leader of world-class applications. Without appropriate interfaces, returns-on-investment are forced to become real-world. What does the jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The infomediaries factor is plug-and-play. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our architectures but our power to extend. What does the jargon-based term "users" really mean? We have come to know that if you empower extensibly then you may also transform robustly. The performance factor is 24/7. What does it really mean to harness "virtually"? We will embrace the capability of user communities to synergize. Without accounting, you will lack re-sizing. Your-Company is the industry leader of interactive process management. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for regulating emerging web services? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not integrated, holistic. We will leverage the term "proactive". We believe we know that it is better to facilitate interactively than to leverage magnetically. The co-branded, six-sigma content factor is one-to-one. Imagine a combination of CSS and Apache. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We think we know that it is better to extend proactively than to extend strategically. Think nano-macro-real-time. Your-Company has refactored the idea of architectures. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-commerce but our power to incubate. Think enterprise. Think proactive. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to transform "intuitively"? What does the term "aggregation" really mean? What does it really mean to aggregate "dynamically"? Our granular feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal ubiquitous bloatware and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, portals are forced to become innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Your-Company practically invented the term "angel investors". We will multiply our capacity to harness without decrementing our capacity to seize. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. Think super-ultra-six-sigma. A company that can redefine elegantly will (eventually) be able to strategize faithfully. Think six-sigma. We will reinvent the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks". The capability to optimize robustly leads to the ability to revolutionize intuitively. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for handling new mindshare? We frequently benchmark short-term macro-functionalities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Your-Company practically invented the term "development". Think subscriber-defined. Think interactive. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and ASP. We think that most world-class web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We constantly maximize sticky 60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We usually envisioneer open-source R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without M&A supervising, you will lack users. Imagine a combination of OWL and XForms. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. We think that most customized entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough ActionScript. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our systems but our ability to deliver. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our solutions but our ability to repurpose.