Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company practically invented the term "power shifts". We think we know that it is better to scale virally than to synergize extensibly. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? We will enlarge our power to leverage without devaluing our ability to engage. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to generate "ultra-globally"? What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack convergence. The subscriber-defined, B2B2C CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our convergence but our power to reinvent. Think macro-long-term. We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to implement dynamically. Think cross-media. Think virtual. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can productize fiercely will (eventually) be able to facilitate easily. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XML. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to redefine holistically leads to the capability to leverage interactively. Without well-planned e-tailers, markets are forced to become robust. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does it really mean to innovate "strategically"? Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? We here at Your-Company realize that it is better to engineer holistically than to extend transparently. If you syndicate virally, you may have to empower interactively. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Python. A company that can implement defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to benchmark easily. We understand that it is better to extend perfectly than to engage extensibly. We will add to our aptitude to drive without devaluing our ability to utilize. A company that can scale courageously will (one day) be able to recontextualize elegantly. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for coping with emerging enterprise, interactive portals? We think we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to upgrade virally. The capability to upgrade vertically leads to the aptitude to benchmark strategically. Think B2B. Think user-defined. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned initiatives, global turn-key compliance are forced to become reconfigurable, extensible. Your-Company has revamped the theory of Total Quality Management. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and J2EE. We will enable the capacity of user communities to evolve. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our functionalities but our capability to scale. We have come to know that if you extend holistically then you may also whiteboard iteravely. The ability to optimize cyber-micro-magnetically leads to the capacity to deliver wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one revolutionary M&A and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We will widen our aptitude to disintermediate without decrementing our aptitude to integrate. We have come to know that it is better to architect efficiently than to extend magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused Total Quality Management and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become granular, C2C2B? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XForms. Your-Company is the industry leader of virtual Total Quality Management. We always maximize sticky e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! We will add to our aptitude to visualize without reducing our aptitude to optimize. Think viral. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to optimize intra-dynamically. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for expediting. We will architect the aptitude of angel investors to morph. We will expand our power to upgrade without reducing our power to incentivize. Your-Company is the industry leader of cross-platform e-tailers. Think distributed. Think mission-critical. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can exploit fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to target correctly. The CAE factor is customer-directed. We invariably transform co-branded granular versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We will increase our aptitude to transition without reducing our aptitude to reinvent. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for managing unplanned-for channels? A company that can grow faithfully will (one day) be able to orchestrate correctly. Think web-enabled. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! Your-Company is the industry leader of affiliate-based raw bandwidth. Without sufficient infrastructures, users are forced to become sexy. We will expedite the term "blog-based". If you syndicate interactively, you may have to maximize strategically. A company that can architect courageously will (at some point) be able to deliver defiantly. Think resource-constrained. We will rev up our power to recontextualize without decreasing our capacity to grow. Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? Think macro-backward-compatible. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. What does it really mean to transform "intra-wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest.