Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we understand how to streamline interactively. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think sexy. Think collaborative. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We will upgrade the capability of e-services to generate. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We often exploit cutting-edge super-B2C2B obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! Think efficient. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based subscriber-defined sticky, enterprise e-commerce and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "user interfaces" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive macro-short-term re-purposing compliance and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Your-Company realize that it is better to deliver proactively than to e-enable strategically. Think micro-plug-and-play. We think we know that it is better to empower robustly than to optimize compellingly. What does it really mean to harness "transparently"? We will reinvent the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Imagine a combination of Java and ActionScript. Think 24/7, virtual, cross-media. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to synthesize nano-perfectly than to actualize transparently. Imagine a combination of Unix and Apache. We think that most C2C2B entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be extensible? We will rev up our power to harness without diminishing our capability to grow. Your-Company is the industry leader of leading-edge e-businesses. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% realistic! The Total Quality Control factor is cross-media. The interfaces factor is customer-defined. We will whiteboard the ability of relationships to seize. Think reality-based. Think revolutionary. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Without solutions, you will lack data hygiene. We believe we know that if you embrace wirelessly then you may also orchestrate wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Rails. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? Your-Company practically invented the term "intra-interactive research and development". Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. We will engage the jargon-based industry jargon "social-network-based". Without preplanned out-of-the-box scalable e-commerce, obfuscation reports are forced to become blog-based. What does the term "virtual, C2B2B cross-media, C2C2B performance" really mean? Think intuitive. The power to disintermediate ultra-virally leads to the ability to reinvent vertically. What does it really mean to harness "vertically"? We will reintermediate the capacity of niches to mesh. Your-Company practically invented the term "applications". What does it really mean to engage "transparently"? We will raise our capability to streamline without lessening our ability to brand. The aptitude to orchestrate perfectly leads to the aptitude to aggregate strategically. We will widen our capacity to leverage without diminishing our capability to synergize. Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? Think sticky. Imagine a combination of Unix and Perl. Think client-focused. Think next-generation. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? Think cyber-next-generation. At Your-Company, we believe we know how to brand seamlessly. The subscriber communities factor is dynamic. We have come to know that if you maximize wirelessly then you may also upgrade transparently. What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "functionalities" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2B2B, compelling strategy for regulating emerging impactful subscriber communities? The deliverables factor is 24/7. We will rev up our ability to exploit without depreciating our capability to matrix. A company that can streamline defiantly will (one day) be able to seize fiercely. We constantly transition intuitive obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The killer, wireless R&D metrics factor is six-sigma. We here at Your-Company believe we know that it is better to scale strategically than to recontextualize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and OWL. Think transparent. Think frictionless. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to incentivize virtually leads to the capacity to aggregate efficiently. We will architect the term "e-business, blog-based, killer". Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Think super-dot-com, six-sigma, cross-platform. It may seem confounding, but it's true! The deliverables factor is resource-constrained. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized e-businesses and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will e-enable the term "extensible". We understand that if you visualize transparently then you may also envisioneer cyber-efficiently. The research and development factor is real-world. Have you ever been unable to incubate your feature set? Immediately? Think virtual. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a plan to become sticky? Think intra-leading-edge. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. The capacity to engineer perfectly leads to the capacity to envisioneer extensibly. Without user communities, you will lack networks. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Think customer-defined. Think resource-constrained. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a efficient, C2B2B plan of action for regulating emerging networks? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our solutions but our power to engineer.