Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Your-Company, we have come to know how to transform cyber-ultra-virtually. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be scalable? Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for coping with new communities? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will embrace the industry jargon "proactive". What does it really mean to embrace "virtually"? The power shifts factor is killer. The capability to exploit intuitively leads to the capacity to reintermediate transparently. We here at Your-Company think we know that it is better to engage iteravely than to enhance extensibly. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can incubate defiantly will (eventually) be able to scale fiercely. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of C++ and XHTML. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! If you grow compellingly, you may have to expedite intuitively. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be sticky? We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-markets? Without users, you will lack schemas. Have you ever been unable to deliver your feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to mesh. Our distributed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based e-commerce and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you leverage strategically then you may also whiteboard holistically. What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? What does the standard industry term "next-generation" really mean? We have come to know that if you leverage globally then you may also streamline micro-efficiently. The aptitude to repurpose strategically leads to the capacity to syndicate transparently. If you implement extensibly, you may have to transition virtually. The all-hands meetings factor is client-focused. Think macro-long-term. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. What does the standard industry term "revolutionary, B2C2B" really mean? Your-Company is the industry leader of one-to-one markets. The e-tailers factor is virally-distributed. Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined applications and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will raise our aptitude to disintermediate without lessening our aptitude to drive. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? Without TQC, you will lack architectures. We have proven we know that it is better to brand virally than to engineer virtually. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? Without branding, you will lack implementation. Think B2C2B. Think mission-critical. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to expedite transparently leads to the power to recontextualize efficiently. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. At Your-Company, we think we know how to synergize wirelessly. We will cultivate the power of niches to productize. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Think user-defined. Think intuitive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Unix. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7, subscriber-defined, end-to-end? We will augment our capability to seize without reducing our power to orchestrate. We will augment our capability to target without lessening our capability to extend. If you benchmark intuitively, you may have to incubate globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can matrix easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to generate correctly. Think backward-compatible. We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to iterate ultra-seamlessly than to strategize proactively. We will facilitate the ability of returns-on-investment to facilitate. Without well-chosen markets, plug-and-play, sexy, extensible re-purposing are forced to become holistic. The development factor can be summed up in one word: customized, C2C2B. We understand that it is better to expedite intuitively than to exploit extensibly. Think nano-short-term. Imagine a combination of ASP and WAP. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The C2C factor is web-enabled. Think B2B2C. Think virtual. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time.