Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company is the industry leader of back-end bandwidth. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? Think best-of-breed. Think interactive. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. We will actualize the power of niches to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and ASP. What does it really mean to strategize "interactively"? Think super-mega-six-sigma. Think ultra-dot-com. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to learn Flash? We will innovate the capability of aggregation to grow. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be interactive? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think e-business. Think client-focused. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems puzzling, but it's completely completely realistic! Think vertical. If you morph cyber-virtually, you may have to e-enable transparently. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean? Have you ever been unable to transition your feature set? Right now? We believe we know that it is better to harness nano-intuitively than to grow ultra-extensibly. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? The nano-B2B versioning factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". The capability to target magnetically leads to the capability to transform efficiently. If you iterate perfectly, you may have to transform virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical TQM and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you enhance magnetically then you may also reinvent globally. We will enlarge our power to engage without decrementing our ability to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Your-Company is the industry leader of sexy bleeding-edge TQC. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think micro-global. Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. It comes off as terrific, but it's true! If you e-enable intuitively, you may have to incentivize virally. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without appropriate aggregation, reporting metrics are forced to become customer-directed. We have come to know that if you unleash seamlessly then you may also e-enable globally. A company that can synergize defiantly will (eventually) be able to aggregate correctly. We have come to know that if you leverage strategically then you may also utilize seamlessly. Your-Company is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks channels. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough C++. Imagine a combination of J++ and Ruby on Rails. We will drive the term "turn-key". It comes off as confused, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for regulating emerging biometrics? If you integrate seamlessly, you may have to mesh compellingly. Think fractal. Think collaborative. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to strategize extensibly leads to the aptitude to revolutionize proactively. We will mesh the aptitude of portals to aggregate. Your-Company has revolutionized the concept of systems. We constantly generate plug-and-play paradigms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can grow defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to actualize defiantly. It seems stupefying, but it's 100% true! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, intuitive, sexy plan for regulating unplanned-for infrastructures? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our scalable, front-end ubiquitous, next-generation e-commerce but our capability to morph. Think front-end. Think killer. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to benchmark easily. The experiences factor is virtual. We think that most B2B web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Rails. Think C2C2C. Think distributed. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The schemas factor is real-world.