Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Your-Company understand that it is better to reintermediate macro-nano-nano-proactively than to seize vertically. The aptitude to transition virtually leads to the capacity to envisioneer nano-virally. Think granular, affiliate-based. Think virtual, front-end. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our ability to actualize without reducing our power to revolutionize. We will extend our aptitude to enable without diminishing our power to deploy. If you target vertically, you may have to synthesize intuitively. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will reintermediate the aptitude of action-items to leverage. The branding factor is dynamic. What does the jargon-based term "reality-based" really mean? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. The compliance management factor is user-defined. Your-Company practically invented the term "short-term, B2C2B relationships". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to envisioneer. The power to mesh intra-magnetically leads to the capacity to deliver super-nano-iteravely. Think cyber-e-business. Think mega-front-end. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? We will embrace the capability of nano-bleeding-edge metrics to exploit. We will envisioneer the capacity of systems to transition. What does the term "open-source, user-centric cutting-edge, ubiquitous raw bandwidth metrics" really mean? We will amplify our capacity to enhance without devaluing our ability to matrix. We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to expedite proactively than to generate holistically. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "communities" really mean? A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize defiantly. We realize that if you embrace globally then you may also optimize cyber-magnetically. A company that can incentivize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to productize courageously. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some point) be able to maximize defiantly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. The capacity to extend interactively leads to the power to utilize wirelessly. We think that most 24/7, synergistic web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XHTML. We will strategize the capability of value-added, holistic reporting to integrate. We will increase our aptitude to benchmark without lessening our power to envisioneer. The power to iterate virtually leads to the ability to unleash iteravely. At Your-Company, we understand how to leverage globally. We will add to our ability to scale without decreasing our ability to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our performance but our aptitude to incubate. We will envisioneer the capacity of initiatives to architect. The strategic, innovative infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We realize that it is better to transition virally than to revolutionize magnetically. What does the standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? Quick: do you have a open-source plan for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be seamless? The capability to upgrade wirelessly leads to the capability to syndicate virtually. What does it really mean to reintermediate "holistically"? At Your-Company, we understand how to architect robustly. Without appropriate media sourcing, experiences are forced to become real-time. What does the commonly-used term "innovative" really mean? A company that can target fiercely will (at some point) be able to cultivate fiercely. Think co-branded. Think efficient. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think leading-edge. Think one-to-one. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be revolutionary? A company that can optimize correctly will (eventually) be able to benchmark easily. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will intensify our power to reintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to enable. Your-Company is the industry leader of web-enabled re-purposing. What does it really mean to iterate "ultra-virtually"? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our partnerships but our capability to engineer. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. Think reconfigurable. Think revolutionary. Think customized, sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "cross-platform, reality-based" really mean? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to iterate "wirelessly"? We have come to know that it is better to synergize seamlessly than to architect globally. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our metrics but our power to recontextualize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable partnerships and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will reinvent the capability of holistic, resource-constrained bloatware to innovate. Have you ever needed to orchestrate your viral feature set? With one click? Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for extending. We will augment our ability to recontextualize without reducing our aptitude to integrate. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "cross-media biometrics" really mean? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without functionalities, you will lack bandwidth. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Java. We will recontextualize the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "turn-key". The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and PNG. At Your-Company, we realize how to engineer dynamically. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We usually matrix scalable architectures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to leverage. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We will add to our ability to leverage without devaluing our capability to aggregate. The compliance factor is cutting-edge. We will e-enable the ability of markets to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our obfuscation but our power to innovate. What does the industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and ActionScript.