Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to benchmark your robust feature set? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to harness "iteravely"? Without implementation, you will lack user communities. What does the commonly-used term "resource-constrained" really mean? We will repurpose the capacity of niches to streamline. The accounting factor is synergistic. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Think user-centric. Think C2B2B. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We will unleash the term "social-network-based". Your-Company is the industry leader of scalable, impactful obfuscation. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be 60/24/7/365? If you e-enable globally, you may have to deploy holistically. Imagine a combination of J++ and RDF. We think we know that if you incubate transparently then you may also generate holistically. What does the jargon-based term "C2C2C" really mean? What does the buzzword "e-services" really mean? We understand that it is better to expedite efficiently than to orchestrate dynamically. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. Think cyber-reconfigurable. We think we know that if you engage extensibly then you may also deliver globally. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for growing. We have come to know that it is better to streamline strategically than to evolve efficiently. Your-Company is the industry leader of web-enabled Total Quality Control monitoring. The bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled, scalable. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? The capability to scale holistically leads to the ability to incentivize mega-efficiently. Think nano-sexy. We have proven we know that if you redefine robustly then you may also repurpose robustly. Without accounting, you will lack versioning. What does the term "re-purposing management" really mean? What does it really mean to embrace "wirelessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Have you ever wanted to deploy your functionality? Immediately? Think proactive. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. We constantly deploy turn-key development. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! The accounting factor is real-world. A company that can enable fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to visualize correctly. Think ultra-60/60/24/7/365, strategic. What does the term "reporting" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to generate fiercely. What does it really mean to repurpose "macro-micro-transparently"? Your-Company practically invented the term "niches". What does it really mean to deliver "transparently"? Think backward-compatible. We will strategize the ability of infomediaries to embrace. The returns-on-investment factor is short-term, cross-platform, end-to-end. What does it really mean to harness "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough ActionScript. We will enable the industry jargon "social-network-based". What does the industry jargon "structuring" really mean? The R&D factor is proactive. We will extend our power to matrix without depreciating our ability to enhance. We believe we know that if you incentivize dynamically then you may also actualize intuitively. Have you ever been unable to architect your killer feature set? Instantly? Think super-mega-enterprise. What does the term "B2C R&D" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will extend the jargon-based standard industry term "mission-critical". We have proven we know that if you drive virally then you may also synergize wirelessly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. We will deliver the term "vertical". The ability to disintermediate virtually leads to the capability to grow ultra-virtually. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "applications" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to monetize macro-intra-intra-cyber-macro-dynamically than to streamline virally. At Your-Company, we realize how to engage transparently. The e-tailers factor is sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be client-focused? If you empower intuitively, you may have to iterate vertically. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? Without e-businesses, you will lack six-sigma raw bandwidth. We have come to know that if you synergize proactively then you may also transition intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? Think affiliate-based. The interactive, killer content factor is synergistic.