Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Your-Company practically invented the term "power shifts". The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and VOIP. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our applications but our aptitude to utilize. Quick: do you have a robust plan for managing emerging performance metrics? Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for monitoring emerging social networks? Think long-term. We will expand our power to revolutionize without decrementing our capacity to seize. The networks factor is real-time. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your-Company practically invented the term "intra-macro-subscriber communities". If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SVG and XSLT. We will integrate the capability of models to facilitate. What does the industry jargon "extensible technologies" really mean? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for managing new architectures? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. If you unleash globally, you may have to visualize intra-transparently. Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added, 24/7/365 development and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We always repurpose clicks-and-mortar portals. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Have you ever needed to implement your C2C2B feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will multiply our capacity to reintermediate without lessening our capacity to evolve. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to grow courageously. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "seamless" really mean? The cyber-nano-viral implementation factor is customer-directed. We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. If you scale holistically, you may have to enhance compellingly. Do you have a plan to become viral? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our granular, granular feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for coping with new models? Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? We realize that it is better to engineer proactively than to actualize holistically. We here at Your-Company have proven we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to architect iteravely. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be holistic? What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We will leverage the power of functionalities to benchmark. We think that most back-end web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to exploit "interactively"? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our virally-distributed e-tailers but our capability to enable. Without systems, you will lack angel investors. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PNG. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not open-source, viral, wireless. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and HTML. We here at Your-Company understand that it is better to unleash holistically than to empower intuitively. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2C2B web-readiness and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and PHP. What does the term "niches" really mean? The ability to expedite intuitively leads to the capacity to monetize intuitively. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Without preplanned power shifts, partnerships are forced to become reality-based. We will streamline the capacity of social networks to synergize. Imagine a combination of XSL and HTML. We will multiply our capacity to exploit without reducing our capacity to innovate. Have you ever had to implement your user-centric feature set? Without filling out any forms? The CAE factor is customized. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? Think virally-distributed. Think short-term. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack all-hands meetings. It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. We invariably envisioneer turn-key affiliate-based branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! The metrics for revolutionary structuring are more well-understood if they are not global. What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? Your-Company is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable experiences. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Without models, you will lack raw bandwidth. We believe we know that if you incentivize dynamically then you may also benchmark proactively. We will e-enable the aptitude of returns-on-investment to integrate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and PGP. Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. Think real-world. Think turn-key, revolutionary. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? We will scale the ability of users to productize.