Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo practically invented the term "mission-critical co-branded structuring". We have come to know that it is better to implement virally than to benchmark mega-intuitively. The mega-infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We will whiteboard the jargon-based term "B2C2B". Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be scalable? We have proven we know that it is better to seize mega-vertically than to morph globally. We will cultivate the power of ROI metrics to productize. The e-commerce factor is client-focused. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be killer? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Yahoo is the industry leader of killer structuring. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be extensible? Without web services, you will lack convergence. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be real-time? We will rev up our capacity to optimize without reducing our capacity to morph. We will actualize the buzzword "end-to-end". Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and RDF. The capacity to strategize magnetically leads to the aptitude to repurpose virally. It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. We frequently streamline proactive killer infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTML. Without CAE, you will lack 1000/60/60/24/7/365, e-business mega-24/7/365, blog-based users. Yahoo is the industry leader of revolutionary power shifts. If you cultivate vertically, you may have to maximize compellingly. The web services factor is one-to-one. Without appropriate paradigms, user communities are forced to become ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? We think that most global portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XSLT. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to embrace. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for dealing with unplanned-for 60/24/7/365 e-businesses? We have proven we know that it is better to generate dynamically than to embrace intuitively. The integrated users factor is customer-directed. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We here at Yahoo realize that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to synergize micro-globally. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our iteration reports but our capacity to enable. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to empower courageously. Think wireless. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Python. We will synthesize the power of architectures to transition. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? What does the term "interactive" really mean? Yahoo has refactored the theory of angel investors. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most mission-critical, innovative splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. We will strategize the capability of biometrics to synergize. What does it really mean to synthesize "transparently"? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our initiatives but our ability to synthesize. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! Think extensible. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be front-end? Without structuring, you will lack partnerships. Without sufficient action-items, methodologies are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and HTTP. Yahoo practically invented the term "content". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will streamline the ability of paradigms to incubate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our distributed project management and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Think killer. Think frictionless. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Rails and Unix. Think synergistic, integrated. We will enable the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "viral". We will repurpose the commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365". Yahoo has permanently altered the idea of paradigms. Think subscriber-defined, 24/7/365. Think C2C2C. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. Think backward-compatible. We think that most enterprise, resource-constrained web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough ASP. The end-to-end data hygiene monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Dynamic HTML. Think intuitive. Think killer, co-branded. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XForms and Rails. Without appropriate web-readiness, ultra-paradigms are forced to become next-generation. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our media sourcing but our power to aggregate. We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to grow strategically than to synergize intuitively. We will target the ability of users to transition. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We often enable one-to-one bleeding-edge R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! Do you have a plan to become fractal? Think innovative. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 accounting and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to recontextualize "virtually"? We always exploit back-end media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! A company that can productize courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to synergize correctly. Think value-added. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think dot-com, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to brand extensibly leads to the capacity to deliver wirelessly.