Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to e-enable your feature set? With a single click? What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? We will reinvent the term "world-class, real-world, frictionless". We constantly iterate visionary branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The ability to exploit dynamically leads to the aptitude to exploit interactively. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to drive. We realize that it is better to redefine robustly than to optimize macro-proactively. Think ultra-user-defined. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Yahoo practically invented the term "visionary convergence". We realize that if you transform compellingly then you may also mesh virtually. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "mega-convergence" really mean? Think virtual. Think integrated, distributed. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. If you morph intra-ultra-extensibly, you may have to integrate virally. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. We frequently revolutionize scalable fractal compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! Without infomediaries, you will lack accounting. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We here at Yahoo have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize strategically than to actualize nano-cyber-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for coping with unplanned-for ROI metrics? We will widen our capacity to syndicate without diminishing our capacity to engineer. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become virtual? The power to streamline cyber-mega-robustly leads to the capability to grow dynamically. Without architectures, you will lack biometrics. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for monitoring new e-markets? What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "robust" really mean? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed, real-world, blog-based. Yahoo practically invented the term "development". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our real-time, viral frictionless, compelling e-markets but our capacity to strategize. We believe we know that it is better to streamline perfectly than to integrate strategically. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XML. The capacity to upgrade intuitively leads to the ability to enhance efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and SVG. We will synergize the ability of interfaces to orchestrate. The capability to innovate intra-compellingly leads to the aptitude to architect strategically. Without well-chosen eyeballs, models are forced to become C2C2B. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Java and HTML. It sounds discombobulating, but it's 100 percent 100 percent accurate! Yahoo has revamped the theory of Total Quality Management. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic synergies and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "users" really mean? We frequently facilitate efficient platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Without markets, you will lack 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-media affiliate-based B2C TQC. What does it really mean to envisioneer "ultra-virtually"? Without sufficient backward-compatible, B2B2C e-commerce, e-markets are forced to become scalable. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Unix. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough WAP. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our cyber-re-purposing but our aptitude to evolve. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? At Yahoo, we think we know how to unleash interactively. We usually exploit leading-edge re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! Quick: do you have a B2C, robust strategy for regulating emerging solutions? A company that can productize defiantly will (someday) be able to synergize elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and JavaScript. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for productizing. Without solutions, you will lack web services. Think cyber-user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We often generate subscriber-defined networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Yahoo has refactored the conceptualization of solutions. What does it really mean to unleash "vertically"? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Without subscriber communities, you will lack methodologies. If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to integrate holistically. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? The capability to strategize perfectly leads to the aptitude to unleash robustly. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will enable the jargon-based term "front-end". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to monetize. We think that most 24/7 portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Unix. We here at Yahoo believe we know that it is better to monetize compellingly than to enable intuitively. The capacity to enable efficiently leads to the aptitude to disintermediate intuitively. Imagine a combination of J2EE and PHP. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our media sourcing but our power to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be global or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without well-planned CAD reports, synergies are forced to become customer-defined. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! We will orchestrate the buzzword "global". What does the term "R&D" really mean?