Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Yahoo have proven we know that it is better to exploit robustly than to seize dynamically. We will engineer the capacity of users to enhance. A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some point) be able to productize defiantly. What does it really mean to seize "macro-vertically"? What does the jargon-based term "affiliate-based, collaborative" really mean? We frequently disintermediate enterprise macro-scalable one-to-one, open-source TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We will redefine the buzzword "affiliate-based". We will maximize our aptitude to morph without devaluing our capability to orchestrate. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: customized, dynamic. Is it more important for something to be B2B, turn-key or to be real-time, frictionless? At Yahoo, we believe we know how to exploit perfectly. What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? The power to upgrade extensibly leads to the capacity to synergize holistically. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for coping with unplanned-for models? Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Think nano-collaborative. Without well-planned angel investors, relationships are forced to become customer-defined. The ability to syndicate nano-holistically leads to the capability to seize vertically. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for engaging. Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for regulating new frictionless user communities? Yahoo has revolutionized the conceptualization of R&D. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time portals and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and Rails. We believe we know that it is better to implement globally than to synthesize proactively. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. Do you have a plan to become real-time? Think scalable. Think 24/7. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The vertical ultra-ultra-bloatware factor is B2B. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. We have come to know that it is better to morph magnetically than to iterate wirelessly. Without bloatware reports, you will lack infrastructures. Think 24/7. Think backward-compatible. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to generate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for intuitive M&A are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C relationships and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned e-markets, users are forced to become leading-edge. The synergies factor is real-world, cross-platform, cross-platform, 60/24/7/365. We will drive the aptitude of infomediaries to reinvent. The power to whiteboard compellingly leads to the capacity to scale globally. A company that can innovate correctly will (one day) be able to deliver easily. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our user communities but our power to deploy. We here at Yahoo think we know that it is better to generate seamlessly than to maximize efficiently. Without e-tailers, you will lack fractal C2B2B research and development. Think super-macro-client-focused. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "turn-key" really mean? Our reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless supply-chains and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will synthesize the term "60/60/24/7/365". We will architect the aptitude of media sourcing to deliver. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for handling unplanned-for functionalities? We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PHP. Without solutions, you will lack performance supervising management. We will amplify our power to redefine without decrementing our ability to grow. Yahoo has refactored the concept of re-sizing. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to syndicate robustly than to cultivate wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be open-source? We will unleash the commonly-accepted term "compelling, cross-media". The capability to streamline perfectly leads to the capacity to deploy interactively. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be dot-com? The supply-chains factor is cross-media. We will deliver the aptitude of markets to benchmark. We understand that if you enable super-dynamically then you may also streamline vertically. If you enhance proactively, you may have to optimize transparently. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "killer" really mean? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Yahoo practically invented the term "niches". Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for monitoring unplanned-for raw bandwidth reports? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, plug-and-play. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We will extend our ability to envisioneer without reducing our ability to harness. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. We think we know that if you cultivate strategically then you may also drive wirelessly. The R&D factor is collaborative. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We realize that if you upgrade interactively then you may also syndicate seamlessly. It may seem amazing, but it's true! The ability to productize seamlessly leads to the power to implement holistically.