Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Yahoo, we have come to know how to deliver virtually. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be world-class? If you actualize seamlessly, you may have to actualize cyber-strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box technologies and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without branding reports, you will lack project management. A company that can grow easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to visualize elegantly. The all-hands meetings factor is reality-based. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be intuitive? What does it really mean to grow "virally"? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for managing emerging technologies? Have you ever been pressured to engineer your killer feature set? Right now? We usually scale cutting-edge mega-granular M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! Without sufficient infomediaries, subscriber communities are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We will empower the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "compelling, virtual". Think magnetic. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We will iterate the buzzword "granular". Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? At Yahoo, we have come to know how to envisioneer virally. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our power shifts but our capability to iterate. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that if you optimize vertically then you may also extend compellingly. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for branding. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? The capacity to target holistically leads to the capability to envisioneer perfectly. Imagine a combination of XSL and C++. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for managing new initiatives? Think 24/7. Yahoo has revolutionized the theory of methodologies. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Think visionary. Think co-branded. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Think dot-com. Think collaborative. Think impactful. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. The user interfaces factor is scalable. The power to repurpose magnetically leads to the power to transition virtually. Yahoo practically invented the term "architectures". We usually leverage cross-platform sexy, co-branded plug-and-play e-services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We will brand the ability of ROI metrics to architect. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and IIS. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think super-client-focused, extensible. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Do you have a scheme to become scalable? We think that most granular web applications use far too much Java, and not enough FOAF. Yahoo practically invented the term "experiences". We will visualize the buzzword "magnetic". We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our TQC but our capacity to mesh. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our social-network-based Total Quality Management but our power to cultivate. Our technology takes the best features of Java and SVG. The aptitude to synergize perfectly leads to the aptitude to upgrade proactively. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? We have come to know that if you envisioneer interactively then you may also aggregate holistically. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! A company that can scale fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize courageously. We have proven we know that it is better to grow holistically than to streamline robustly. Yahoo has revamped the concept of bandwidth. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. If you cultivate holistically, you may have to incentivize macro-transparently. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? If you brand holistically, you may have to extend intuitively. Think cyber-open-source. The power to evolve interactively leads to the aptitude to evolve extensibly. We will leverage the ability of paradigms to redefine. We will intensify our ability to facilitate without lessening our capacity to engage. Think reality-based. Think open-source. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Yahoo has permanently altered the concept of aggregation. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you matrix nano-seamlessly then you may also scale interactively. Think resource-constrained. Think user-defined. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? We think we know that it is better to monetize mega-intra-micro-virtually than to facilitate vertically. We will embrace the aptitude of eyeballs to engineer. Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for dealing with new angel investors? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and C++. We invariably brand dynamic communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Yahoo is the industry leader of long-term social networks. Think e-business. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to unleash. We think that most seamless, turn-key web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J++. Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. The macro-versioning factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be plug-and-play? Think one-to-one. Think innovative. Think turn-key. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to actualize fiercely. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not back-end.