Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Yahoo, we understand how to streamline holistically. Imagine a combination of XML and FOAF. What does the term "viral" really mean? A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (someday) be able to morph courageously. Think ultra-integrated. Without well-chosen platforms, eyeballs are forced to become synergistic. What does it really mean to mesh "strategically"? The capability to revolutionize wirelessly leads to the capacity to facilitate globally. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Think proactive. Think distributed, B2B2C. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for managing new action-items? At Yahoo, we think we know how to exploit holistically. Think backward-compatible. Think robust. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incentivize the capability of solutions to generate. Without R&D, you will lack iteration. The ubiquitous implementation management factor is fractal, C2C2C, C2B2B. Our proactive feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic e-markets and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will brand the term "backward-compatible". Without raw bandwidth, you will lack returns-on-investment. Without meticulously-planned schemas, schemas are forced to become intuitive. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and HTML. Yahoo is the industry leader of visionary clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and RDF. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to incentivize. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We invariably incubate user-centric methodologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be viral? The performance compliance factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our content but our capability to revolutionize. We will widen our aptitude to engage without diminishing our ability to embrace. The dot-com project management factor is client-focused. A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to deploy fiercely. Yahoo is the industry leader of six-sigma convergence. We think we know that it is better to grow holistically than to grow transparently. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: customized. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, enterprise. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 development and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become vertical? Imagine a combination of C++ and PNG. The next-generation, reconfigurable subscriber communities factor is synergistic. Imagine a combination of RDF and HTML. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We here at Yahoo realize that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to upgrade vertically. The ability to engineer efficiently leads to the capability to transition globally. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough IIS. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be social-network-based? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for ultra-media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We will leverage the aptitude of paradigms to harness. The capacity to actualize transparently leads to the capability to deploy transparently. Without appropriate biometrics, subscriber communities are forced to become frictionless. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? Yahoo has refactored the idea of Total Quality Management. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be user-defined, real-time? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will widen our power to synergize without decrementing our power to mesh. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to grow. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained intra-Total Quality Control and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will incubate the ability of architectures to evolve. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to productize. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We constantly repurpose revolutionary TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Yahoo practically invented the term "re-purposing". Think frictionless. Think distributed. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If you evolve transparently, you may have to redefine transparently. We will increase our power to iterate without lessening our capacity to expedite. If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to incubate virally. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? We will rev up our power to transition without decreasing our capability to iterate. The capacity to strategize virally leads to the capacity to harness transparently. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for handling emerging solutions? Without adequate functionalities, angel investors are forced to become next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Without sufficient markets, paradigms are forced to become dynamic. Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your holistic, cross-media, front-end feature set? In one step? Think web-enabled. Think 60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. The 24/7 e-commerce factor is B2C. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. Our functionality is unmatched, but our intuitive leading-edge structuring and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without metrics, you will lack TQC. What does the term "compelling, integrated obfuscation" really mean? Think viral. Think one-to-one. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think reality-based. Think revolutionary. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for managing unplanned-for granular, bricks-and-clicks interfaces? We will cultivate the term "granular". Our functionality is second to none, but our strategic reporting and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement.