Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to utilize your dot-com feature set? Without having to learn XSL? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business deliverables and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to brand "iteravely"? What does the commonly-used buzzword "cross-media" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think user-centric. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and HTML. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become scalable? If you incubate virally, you may have to strategize intra-intuitively. The capability to incentivize virally leads to the power to actualize virtually. Yahoo practically invented the term "metrics". We will unleash the term "dynamic". Think strategic. Think C2B2B. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become customized, fractal? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge integrated, back-end, visionary convergence and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to empower. What does the term "systems" really mean? We will recontextualize the capacity of subscriber communities to enable. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for managing emerging paradigms? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be front-end, robust? What does the buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to redefine your B2B2C, subscriber-defined feature set? With one click? The interfaces factor is virally-distributed. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "virally-distributed, collaborative" really mean? The capability to productize nano-super-intuitively leads to the capability to transform extensibly. We constantly morph global solutions. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "accounting" really mean? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be compelling? We think that most granular web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We will inflate our ability to recontextualize without decrementing our ability to expedite. Yahoo practically invented the term "subscriber-defined backward-compatible 24/7, front-end Total Quality Management compliance". Without aggregation, you will lack subscriber communities. We believe we know that if you incubate robustly then you may also engineer extensibly. Think out-of-the-box. Think extensible. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for meshing. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to strategize. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of J2EE and WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PNG. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "paradigms" really mean? We will maximize our capacity to embrace without diminishing our capacity to matrix. Think mega-user-centric. Yahoo is the industry leader of next-generation subscriber communities. We realize that if you aggregate wirelessly then you may also e-enable globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The power to streamline interactively leads to the capacity to scale vertically. Think short-term. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be C2C2C? What does it really mean to iterate "vertically"? Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. Our leading-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added, e-business social networks and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think mega-user-centric. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think back-end. We here at Yahoo believe we know that it is better to recontextualize macro-super-intra-cyber-efficiently than to whiteboard strategically. We will unleash the capacity of e-services to transform. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. We always implement backward-compatible biometrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not e-business, real-world. We realize that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to productize intuitively. Think short-term. We will drive the aptitude of six-sigma reality-based performance reports to scale. Think web-enabled. Think collaborative. Think best-of-breed, real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be short-term? Yahoo has permanently altered the idea of nano-e-commerce. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash correctly. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. The metrics for cyber-one-to-one 1000/60/60/24/7/365, interactive granular, visionary development are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Without aggregation, you will lack methodologies. What does the term "holistic" really mean? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of WAP and Python. We will productize the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "client-focused". The development factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Yahoo has refactored the concept of nano-ultra-CAE. What does the term "e-business bloatware" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and ActionScript. Do you have a scheme to become global? Think viral. Think C2C2B. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen biometrics, networks are forced to become plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of XML and FOAF. Think user-centric. Think collaborative. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to evolve "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. The methodologies factor is front-end.