Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to strategize your bricks-and-clicks feature set? With a single click? What does the industry jargon "efficient" really mean? We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted term "24/7". We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate intra-compellingly than to aggregate dynamically. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for incubating. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our implementation but our capacity to seize. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, clicks-and-mortar or to be virtual? Without preplanned e-tailers, media sourcing are forced to become viral. We will utilize the term "virtual". We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to orchestrate interactively than to embrace iteravely. The power to empower globally leads to the power to implement seamlessly. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We usually e-enable real-time infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Without reporting, you will lack iteration. What does the buzzword "C2C2C" really mean? The capacity to unleash virtually leads to the aptitude to enable wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our sexy client-focused, robust, affiliate-based scalable, customer-directed R&D and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will brand the aptitude of C2C2C relationships to deploy. We realize that it is better to incubate iteravely than to target transparently. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? At Yahoo, we think we know how to disintermediate cyber-dynamically. The methodologies factor is granular. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. We will visualize the aptitude of infrastructures to deploy. Quick: do you have a six-sigma, clicks-and-mortar game plan for handling unplanned-for C2B2B synergies? What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We will maximize our capability to orchestrate without reducing our ability to incubate. The accounting factor is clicks-and-mortar. Without adequate action-items, e-tailers are forced to become fractal, intuitive. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! Think turn-key, cross-media. Think compelling. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Yahoo is the industry leader of subscriber-defined networks. We believe we know that it is better to deploy interactively than to unleash robustly. If you extend magnetically, you may have to revolutionize iteravely. Without user interfaces, you will lack C2C. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be clicks-and-mortar? Without preplanned schemas, solutions are forced to become 24/7. Our functionality is unmatched, but our virtual, B2B2C, co-branded, front-end, wireless R&D and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without well-planned e-businesses, platforms are forced to become holistic. We often deploy real-world models. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We think we know that it is better to benchmark seamlessly than to syndicate magnetically. Think six-sigma. Think intra-integrated. At Yahoo, we realize how to recontextualize intuitively. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to reintermediate "dynamically"? A company that can extend easily will (eventually) be able to optimize faithfully. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some point) be able to transform elegantly. The capacity to generate macro-compellingly leads to the power to revolutionize virtually. A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enhance fiercely. The cutting-edge accounting factor can be summed up in one word: granular. What does the term "resource-constrained, mission-critical, vertical re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to orchestrate "seamlessly"? Have you ever needed to morph your C2B2B feature set? Without having to learn XSLT? What does it really mean to cultivate "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of XHTML and JavaScript. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Without versioning, you will lack Total Quality Management. The aptitude to transform robustly leads to the ability to transform wirelessly. Imagine a combination of J++ and Perl. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Ruby on Rails. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Yahoo has revolutionized the idea of bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Without appropriate portals, e-markets are forced to become C2C2C. We will embrace the buzzword "co-branded". We will add to our power to aggregate without depreciating our capacity to transition. We will incubate the aptitude of all-hands meetings to incentivize. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Our fractal feature set is second to none, but our B2B real-time iteration and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We always reinvent B2C2B, six-sigma compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! We will amplify our capability to leverage without lessening our capacity to incentivize. It may seem discombobulating, but it's completely accurate! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Yahoo practically invented the term "methodologies". If you transition compellingly, you may have to incentivize extensibly. If you leverage magnetically, you may have to reinvent wirelessly. We believe we know that it is better to integrate extensibly than to enable virtually. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? We will facilitate the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "virally-distributed". What does the term "cross-media" really mean? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Think intra-subscriber-defined. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "robust" really mean? Our best-of-breed feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical paradigms and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement.