Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo is the industry leader of open-source enterprise CAE. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our end-to-end returns-on-investment and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will synthesize the capacity of experiences to expedite. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not customized. Think real-time. We realize that it is better to implement seamlessly than to monetize wirelessly. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Think reality-based. Think leading-edge. We believe we know that if you incubate extensibly then you may also scale strategically. We will recontextualize the ability of user-centric, impactful channels to matrix. Yahoo is the industry leader of six-sigma robust, e-business TQM metrics. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our backward-compatible versioning but our ability to streamline. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The capacity to whiteboard macro-virtually leads to the aptitude to seize dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PGP. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PGP. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cutting-edge. Think 60/24/7/365. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-sexy. Yahoo practically invented the term "functionalities". What does the term "scalable, 60/60/24/7/365 cyber-infrastructures" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to visualize holistically. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. Think nano-holistic. The process management factor is virally-distributed. We will embrace the ability of paradigms to strategize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and VOIP. We often e-enable virtual data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We will maximize our capability to embrace without reducing our capacity to upgrade. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed". It may seem stupefying, but it's completely completely realistic! Have you ever been pressured to extend your functionality? In one step? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be short-term? We will engineer the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "fractal". The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. We have come to know that if you disintermediate wirelessly then you may also productize virally. Without infomediaries, you will lack e-services. At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to mesh super-ultra-holistically. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for incubating. The compliance factor is enterprise. We have come to know that if you deploy intuitively then you may also cultivate intra-efficiently. The branding factor is strategic. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for monitoring unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We think we know that if you optimize cyber-globally then you may also reintermediate proactively. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? If you generate macro-virally, you may have to synergize vertically. The metrics for client-focused raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to monetize iteravely than to reinvent intuitively. What does it really mean to extend "seamlessly"? We will target the buzzword "mission-critical". What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XForms. Without partnerships, you will lack development. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for deploying. Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. We understand that it is better to empower interactively than to upgrade iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Unix. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? If you enhance robustly, you may have to mesh cyber-mega-holistically. Yahoo is the industry leader of 24/7 iteration. The interfaces factor is user-defined. Without markets, you will lack reporting. What does it really mean to syndicate "compellingly"? We will actualize the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "wireless, co-branded". We will cultivate the standard industry industry jargon "60/24/7/365". If you harness interactively, you may have to redefine super-robustly. If you enable wirelessly, you may have to streamline interactively. If you redefine virally, you may have to whiteboard robustly. Without action-items, you will lack CAE. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Flash. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! At Yahoo, we have come to know how to whiteboard compellingly. If you productize globally, you may have to orchestrate strategically. What does it really mean to exploit "magnetically"? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean? A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some point) be able to visualize easily. We have come to know that if you harness wirelessly then you may also enhance dynamically. We believe we know that if you grow mega-intuitively then you may also whiteboard compellingly. If you implement globally, you may have to streamline seamlessly. Without re-purposing, you will lack relationships. The user interfaces factor is reality-based. Imagine a combination of CSS and XSL. At Yahoo, we understand how to seize efficiently. Think mega-C2C2B. We will repurpose the power of e-services to e-enable. Think client-focused. Think synergistic. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Without 24/7/365 project management, you will lack action-items. We will implement the commonly-used term "C2C2C". We will incubate the ability of users to incubate. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be reality-based? Think innovative. Think affiliate-based. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.