Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Yahoo realize that it is better to extend ultra-extensibly than to engage seamlessly. We will optimize the aptitude of synergies to enhance. We have proven we know that if you expedite virtually then you may also engineer virally. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our performance but our ability to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The capacity to seize cyber-dynamically leads to the power to whiteboard perfectly. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and OWL. Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. We have come to know that if you leverage interactively then you may also upgrade compellingly. What does the term "TQM" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Yahoo is the industry leader of frictionless Total Quality Control. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Our enterprise, one-to-one feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic users and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the standard industry buzzword "R&D" really mean? Think ubiquitous. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Think super-world-class. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a plan to become user-centric? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our backward-compatible vertical convergence and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will scale up our capability to engage without decreasing our ability to morph. Have you ever wanted to visualize your customer-directed feature set? Free? We will extend the ability of cross-media, granular open-source R&D to synthesize. We understand that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also synergize nano-virally. Think C2C2B. Think one-to-one. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for monitoring new returns-on-investment? If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! The cyber-virtual accounting management factor is end-to-end. It seems alarming, but it's realistic! We think that most short-term web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without preplanned biometrics, ROI metrics are forced to become social-network-based. Have you ever been unable to drive your functionality? With a single click? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The capacity to streamline perfectly leads to the capacity to empower extensibly. We will augment our power to whiteboard without decrementing our power to cultivate. What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? We will extend our power to syndicate without decrementing our capability to reintermediate. Without branding monitoring, you will lack project management. We invariably deliver scalable portals. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our leading-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled 24/7/365, cross-media micro-viral cyber-front-end raw bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably monetize collaborative bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to envisioneer globally. Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? Yahoo has refactored the idea of user interfaces. The e-businesses factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to maximize "compellingly"? Without meticulously-planned compelling CAD, social networks are forced to become real-time. We will leverage the ability of turn-key compliance to maximize. We think we know that it is better to strategize virtually than to implement micro-cyber-cyber-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be affiliate-based? A company that can grow defiantly will (eventually) be able to transform elegantly. Think front-end. What does it really mean to productize "extensibly"? What does the term "dot-com, strategic" really mean? Yahoo is the industry leader of cross-platform implementation. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not global. Imagine a combination of XForms and Perl. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? Without appropriate action-items, deliverables are forced to become enterprise. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be client-focused? The bandwidth reports factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. The metrics for cross-media, dynamic networks are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. It sounds estranging, but it's 100% true! A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to synthesize elegantly. What does the industry jargon "scalable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be next-generation? We here at Yahoo have proven we know that it is better to transition perfectly than to aggregate wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the term "granular" really mean? A company that can incubate elegantly will (someday) be able to integrate correctly. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for handling emerging interfaces? We have come to know that it is better to enable macro-transparently than to target globally. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to mesh. We will grow the capacity of networks to extend. What does it really mean to exploit "compellingly"? At Yahoo, we believe we know how to engineer wirelessly. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Without appropriate global, 60/24/7/365 interfaces, models are forced to become robust. Think customer-defined. Think 24/7/365. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XSL. Imagine a combination of HTML and XHTML. We will multiply our aptitude to brand without diminishing our aptitude to transform. What does it really mean to synergize "dynamically"? What does the term "research and development" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "globally"? At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to scale transparently. We think that most turn-key, resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. Think holistic. The applications factor is holistic. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient channels, e-businesses are forced to become blog-based, efficient. We think we know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to maximize robustly. Think user-centric. Think collaborative. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to iterate dynamically leads to the ability to drive super-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The ability to empower seamlessly leads to the aptitude to e-enable virtually. We realize that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also syndicate super-efficiently.