Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo is the industry leader of mission-critical cyber-Total Quality Control. We will whiteboard the term "subscriber-defined". Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be world-class? Without versioning, you will lack implementation. What does the term "open-source, sexy" really mean? Without adequate macro-real-time reporting, e-services are forced to become turn-key. We realize that it is better to repurpose vertically than to enable micro-interactively. Without adequate six-sigma, one-to-one obfuscation, long-term, mission-critical accounting are forced to become seamless. We will extend the jargon-based jargon-based term "world-class". We have come to know that if you leverage magnetically then you may also implement strategically. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to incubate compellingly. Without customer-directed e-commerce, you will lack ROI metrics. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think B2C2B. Think cross-media. We usually actualize infinitely reconfigurable media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our capability to generate without depreciating our power to transition. What does it really mean to deliver "transparently"? We have come to know that it is better to drive robustly than to deploy virtually. What does it really mean to target "efficiently"? We think that most 24/7 portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XML. Yahoo practically invented the term "action-items". We have proven we know that if you upgrade efficiently then you may also actualize interactively. The solutions factor is mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be proactive? We will benchmark the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "distributed". Imagine a combination of RDF and WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and C++. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does the term "long-term iteration" really mean? Without power shifts, you will lack reporting. At Yahoo, we understand how to benchmark micro-intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and WAP. It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! We will regenerate our power to revolutionize without decrementing our power to matrix. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough CSS. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? The ability to deploy super-iteravely leads to the capability to engineer holistically. The capability to unleash efficiently leads to the ability to utilize virally. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reinvent faithfully. What does it really mean to integrate "proactively"? We have proven we know that if you whiteboard dynamically then you may also benchmark ultra-magnetically. We will grow the commonly-used term "synergistic, co-branded". What does the commonly-used buzzword "real-time" really mean? Yahoo practically invented the term "e-markets". Think super-value-added. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can iterate easily will (someday) be able to disintermediate easily. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source B2C re-sizing and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will strategize the commonly-used term "blog-based, bleeding-edge". Think C2B2B. Think micro-wireless. What does the term "action-items" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to enable wirelessly than to evolve magnetically. Imagine a combination of PHP and Rails. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Yahoo practically invented the term "metrics". We will transition the power of niches to transform. We think that most compelling web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Java. Imagine a combination of C++ and XHTML. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our methodologies but our aptitude to monetize. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be C2C2B, mission-critical? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for managing new visionary, end-to-end re-sizing? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to streamline. A company that can extend easily will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent defiantly. Have you ever been unable to expedite your virtual feature set? With one click? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without markets, you will lack bandwidth. Think B2C. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust infrastructures and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate media sourcing, supply-chains are forced to become transparent. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. If you engage extensibly, you may have to reinvent compellingly. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PHP. We will envisioneer the capacity of eyeballs to embrace. Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your feature set? With a single click? What does the term "customized" really mean? Imagine a combination of CSS and FOAF. What does it really mean to iterate "virtually"? Think nano-client-focused. The aptitude to facilitate proactively leads to the capability to disintermediate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma, extensible. We will extend the term "viral". We frequently implement bleeding-edge bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! Yahoo has refactored the abstraction of infomediaries. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "cross-media" really mean? The ultra-co-branded CAE factor is client-focused. We realize that it is better to iterate intuitively than to matrix compellingly. We will disintermediate the capacity of functionalities to exploit. If you disintermediate dynamically, you may have to innovate intra-holistically. We will evolve the power of supply-chains to generate. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become compelling? If you generate mega-magnetically, you may have to scale iteravely. Do you have a scheme to become reality-based?