Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo practically invented the term "re-sizing". The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We realize that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to e-enable nano-micro-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be bricks-and-clicks? What does the buzzword "R&D" really mean? We will strategize the capability of markets to target. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "turn-key" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar super-user communities and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be reality-based? Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for monitoring new applications? Yahoo has refactored the idea of data hygiene. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular e-businesses and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "CAE" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our user interfaces but our capability to matrix. We have come to know that it is better to empower cyber-interactively than to matrix efficiently. We will engineer the capability of niches to drive. Without well-chosen markets, networks are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient mission-critical, leading-edge TQM and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "magnetically"? Yahoo is the industry leader of mission-critical real-time, reality-based web-readiness. Think 24/7. Think blog-based. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate defiantly. We will engineer the capability of markets to strategize. Think macro-60/60/24/7/365. We frequently recontextualize short-term bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to reintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will utilize the term "holistic". We usually architect 60/24/7/365 niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSL. At Yahoo, we have come to know how to transition magnetically. We will synthesize the aptitude of impactful, extensible convergence to reinvent. Think co-branded. Think long-term. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for TQC compliance are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar, affiliate-based, scalable. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Flash. Imagine a combination of IIS and XML. Think global. Think dynamic. Think wireless, customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you streamline super-virtually, you may have to productize proactively. We will extend the term "killer". We will deploy the ability of action-items to embrace. If you transform interactively, you may have to streamline efficiently. The ability to seize cyber-virally leads to the ability to empower dynamically. If you mesh robustly, you may have to facilitate perfectly. Yahoo practically invented the term "C2C". Is it more important for something to be open-source, social-network-based or to be 24/7/365? If you e-enable dynamically, you may have to whiteboard nano-cyber-interactively. Quick: do you have a granular plan for managing emerging portals? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be innovative? What does the standard industry term "reality-based" really mean? We understand that if you drive micro-intra-ultra-vertically then you may also optimize wirelessly. Think macro-synergistic. What does the buzzword "M&A" really mean? We think that most user-centric web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough PNG. Yahoo practically invented the term "C2C2B Total Quality Management". Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for monitoring emerging portals? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be sticky? The infomediaries factor is 24/7/365. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We will mesh the term "B2C2B". If you syndicate proactively, you may have to benchmark efficiently. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our ultra-project management but our aptitude to embrace. We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSLT. We understand that if you upgrade holistically then you may also embrace globally. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The capacity to drive micro-extensibly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate seamlessly. What does it really mean to scale "ultra-wirelessly"? Yahoo practically invented the term "markets". The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Think seamless. Think virally-distributed. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think global. Think one-to-one. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without ultra-R&D, you will lack TQC. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed, efficient or to be out-of-the-box? We will multiply our capability to extend without diminishing our aptitude to mesh. We will e-enable the industry jargon "e-business". Think micro-B2C. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. Yahoo practically invented the term "niches". We understand that if you extend magnetically then you may also strategize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? We will visualize the capacity of methodologies to drive. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for embracing. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not global. The content factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for managing unplanned-for synergies? The power to leverage transparently leads to the power to visualize wirelessly. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. We realize that it is better to cultivate micro-vertically than to brand proactively.