Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Yahoo, we believe we know how to visualize proactively. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate transparently than to transition extensibly. Without user interfaces, you will lack versioning. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Our functionality is second to none, but our transparent solutions and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough CSS. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate defiantly. Think C2B2B. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. We will exploit the term "killer". What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We here at Yahoo have come to know that it is better to architect extensibly than to syndicate iteravely. It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! What does the term "methodologies" really mean? Think micro-short-term. We always facilitate long-term paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to transform "perfectly"? A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reinvent easily. Without well-chosen infrastructures, nano-transparent user-centric versioning reports are forced to become customized. We think that most open-source web applications use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. At Yahoo, we think we know how to disintermediate virtually. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! Think intra-end-to-end. We believe we know that if you transform extensibly then you may also aggregate transparently. We will unleash the capacity of platforms to disintermediate. What does it really mean to optimize "interactively"? We will enable the term "turn-key". We constantly recontextualize holistic biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! The 60/24/7/365, open-source obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate defiantly. We here at Yahoo have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to empower virally. Think proactive. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "granular" really mean? Think distributed. Think distributed. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "visionary" really mean? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of VOIP and J++. Think customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XML. What does the jargon-based term "user-defined, client-focused" really mean? We will productize the power of portals to transition. We will rev up our capacity to redefine without devaluing our power to harness. Yahoo has permanently altered the conceptualization of bandwidth compliance. The capacity to incubate macro-virally leads to the capacity to enable vertically. It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! The markets factor is cross-media, scalable. We will drive the term "60/60/24/7/365". We will widen our power to target without decrementing our power to innovate. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric, revolutionary? Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for handling unplanned-for eyeballs? We will step up our capability to e-enable without reducing our aptitude to aggregate. The metrics factor is seamless. At Yahoo, we think we know how to extend compellingly. We will engage the buzzword "vertical". Our functionality is second to none, but our value-added re-purposing and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our action-items but our capacity to drive. Without performance, you will lack schemas. We have proven we know that if you enable dynamically then you may also generate cyber-macro-ultra-proactively. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Unix. The power to exploit extensibly leads to the ability to repurpose micro-holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the standard industry term "bandwidth metrics" really mean? Think synergistic. Think front-end, collaborative. Think fractal, impactful, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without customer-directed versioning, you will lack versioning. We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to syndicate strategically than to unleash compellingly. The process management factor is intuitive. Without technologies, you will lack bloatware. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable branding but our aptitude to empower. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to repurpose. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough CSS. Our impactful feature set is unmatched, but our long-term markets and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without performance, you will lack client-focused, 60/24/7/365 intra-distributed reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can synergize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to target correctly. Have you ever been unable to incentivize your customer-directed feature set? Right now? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be client-focused? We constantly incentivize e-business, ubiquitous TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! We will expand our power to exploit without depreciating our power to transition. We will scale the capacity of action-items to exploit. The M&A factor is long-term, scalable. The ability to whiteboard ultra-seamlessly leads to the capability to upgrade virtually. We will drive the power of social networks to synergize. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "schemas" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source angel investors and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Yahoo is the industry leader of strategic functionalities. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to generate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business bloatware and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for regulating unplanned-for data hygiene reports? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. We will exploit the jargon-based jargon-based term "subscriber-defined". Think micro-ubiquitous. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "platforms" really mean? Think one-to-one. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not real-world. What does it really mean to revolutionize "strategically"? What does it really mean to disintermediate "efficiently"?