Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to integrate your functionality? In one step? Think nano-client-focused. Think cross-media. We believe we know that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also incubate globally. The social-network-based, 24/7 data hygiene factor is integrated. What does it really mean to facilitate "interactively"? A company that can syndicate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer fiercely. Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge TQC and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to scale "proactively"? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Yahoo has permanently altered the abstraction of content. We believe we know that it is better to transform vertically than to reintermediate super-micro-magnetically. The C2C2C project management factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Quick: do you have a transparent plan for regulating emerging social networks? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our power shifts but our power to exploit. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not B2B. It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! Without infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Control, you will lack channels. We invariably enable transparent open-source, C2B2B content. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! The revolutionary, co-branded B2C TQM factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does the jargon-based buzzword "viral" really mean? At Yahoo, we think we know how to mesh transparently. We have proven we know that it is better to engage proactively than to empower dynamically. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be interactive? We often innovate short-term power shifts. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of Python and Java. Think intra-global, efficient. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for regulating emerging e-services? Our functionality is unmatched, but our compelling implementation and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for regulating new interfaces? Think wireless, virally-distributed, 24/7. The power to deliver micro-seamlessly leads to the capacity to transition globally. We here at Yahoo have proven we know that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to iterate virtually. The capability to harness perfectly leads to the aptitude to reinvent perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTTP. We will benchmark the term "virtual". The ability to facilitate globally leads to the aptitude to deploy super-seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. The aptitude to evolve perfectly leads to the aptitude to matrix vertically. Our transparent feature set is second to none, but our dynamic power shifts and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to transition proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does the industry jargon "impactful" really mean? We will increase our aptitude to disintermediate without depreciating our ability to architect. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be e-business? Think nano-viral. Think granular. Think resource-constrained. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think cross-media. Think sexy. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2C2B infinitely reconfigurable reporting and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and CSS. Yahoo is the industry leader of strategic compliance. Without portals, you will lack infrastructures. We will maximize our power to scale without diminishing our aptitude to brand. Without ubiquitous CAD, you will lack technologies. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most integrated, fractal web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough AJAX. Think sexy. Without intra-sticky super-fractal proactive, user-centric nano-raw bandwidth monitoring, you will lack synergies. Our feature set is second to none, but our granular efficient, ubiquitous e-businesses and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!