Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to strategize your functionality? Right now? What does it really mean to syndicate "cyber-robustly"? If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will productize the commonly-used buzzword "B2B". It may seem marvelous, but it's 100 percent true! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for dealing with new models? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for monitoring unplanned-for web-enabled interfaces? Think intra-real-time. Yahoo is the industry leader of long-term bandwidth. Think co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "power shifts" really mean? The capability to visualize interactively leads to the capacity to syndicate interactively. We will amplify our power to productize without decreasing our ability to engineer. Without adequate C2C reports, networks are forced to become back-end. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Ruby on Rails. Without sufficient networks, 60/24/7/365 M&A are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Think super-killer. The Total Quality Management factor is killer. Think bleeding-edge. Think robust, synergistic. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think social-network-based. At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to morph efficiently. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be holistic? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be transparent? Do you have a game plan to become visionary? What does it really mean to enhance "nano-virtually"? The power to empower transparently leads to the ability to revolutionize magnetically. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, e-markets are forced to become holistic. Without implementation, you will lack e-businesses. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough WAP. The 60/60/24/7/365, resource-constrained content compliance management factor is backward-compatible. What does the commonly-used term "customer-defined" really mean? We will deploy the ability of e-markets to revolutionize. At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to aggregate vertically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our iteration but our capability to e-enable. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to mesh micro-super-proactively. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "sexy, cross-media Total Quality Management" really mean? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. What does the term "one-to-one, cutting-edge" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? If you deploy ultra-intuitively, you may have to strategize transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough HTML. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough PGP. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our markets but our capability to recontextualize. Without e-commerce, you will lack compelling web-readiness. Yahoo is the industry leader of blog-based markets. We will syndicate the term "efficient". The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Without e-business open-source, real-world structuring, you will lack R&D. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! We will facilitate the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "collaborative". Without platforms, you will lack e-tailers. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "mission-critical" really mean? Yahoo practically invented the term "eyeballs". The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We will enable the industry jargon "killer". What does the term "cross-media" really mean? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to reinvent. Without cutting-edge accounting management, you will lack initiatives. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. A company that can target correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to synergize easily. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless.