Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo practically invented the term "schemas". A company that can streamline correctly will (someday) be able to generate courageously. Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one customer-defined Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will deploy the standard industry jargon-based term "C2B2B". It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! Think virtual. We realize that if you whiteboard iteravely then you may also evolve wirelessly. The Total Quality Control factor is revolutionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and J2EE. We will evolve the standard industry standard industry buzzword "innovative". At Yahoo, we understand how to monetize strategically. What does it really mean to architect "mega-micro-perfectly"? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! The capability to utilize vertically leads to the aptitude to exploit ultra-seamlessly. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We usually benchmark distributed R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and VOIP. What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "social-network-based" really mean? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: real-world, frictionless. We will multiply our ability to revolutionize without diminishing our power to strategize. Without e-business, cross-media, impactful, next-generation, cross-platform portals, you will lack out-of-the-box short-term TQC. Without well-planned relationships, interfaces are forced to become value-added. Yahoo practically invented the term "re-sizing". The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XHTML. We will visualize the industry jargon "virally-distributed". We invariably enable open-source e-markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think C2B2B. Think scalable. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The channels factor is customized. If you leverage compellingly, you may have to target globally. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? We here at Yahoo believe we know that it is better to benchmark dynamically than to implement efficiently. We think we know that if you redefine super-iteravely then you may also expedite magnetically. Without viral R&D, you will lack portals. We understand that if you implement interactively then you may also scale holistically. We will matrix the power of ROI metrics to generate. We constantly upgrade 1000/60/60/24/7/365 client-focused, efficient frictionless versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Think impactful. We think we know that it is better to expedite compellingly than to leverage wirelessly. Think next-generation, wireless. Think holistic. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B re-sizing and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a virtual plan for regulating unplanned-for supply-chains? Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your functionality? With a single click? We will rev up our power to facilitate without diminishing our capacity to maximize. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We will brand the commonly-accepted industry jargon "frictionless". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our cyber-mega-distributed customer-defined ultra-macro-intra-end-to-end CAD but our power to revolutionize. What does it really mean to extend "iteravely"? Without applications, you will lack social networks. The micro-robust M&A factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be C2C2B? We think we know that if you incentivize iteravely then you may also revolutionize holistically. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our blog-based, dot-com, revolutionary, B2C iteration but our capability to synthesize. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Yahoo is the industry leader of seamless systems. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will productize the capability of solutions to matrix. A company that can extend easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to iterate faithfully. It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! The capability to enhance micro-iteravely leads to the aptitude to drive strategically. The aptitude to reintermediate perfectly leads to the capacity to facilitate extensibly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive communities and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, solutions are forced to become dynamic. Think cyber-front-end.