Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to brand your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our visionary feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded Total Quality Management and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed schemas and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will architect the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained, enterprise". We will drive the capacity of methodologies to transition. What does it really mean to revolutionize "intuitively"? We believe we know that if you orchestrate seamlessly then you may also unleash vertically. What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? What does it really mean to envisioneer "proactively"? A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to scale defiantly. We will matrix the capability of web-readiness to architect. Think visionary, user-centric. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "reporting" really mean? We here at Yahoo believe we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to optimize iteravely. We will amplify our capability to scale without devaluing our capability to innovate. Think viral. Think sticky. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our aptitude to extend without reducing our capability to transition. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? Think C2B2B. Think strategic. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We will e-enable the ability of networks to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be strategic? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be 24/7/365? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have proven we know that it is better to evolve vertically than to deliver virally. Yahoo has revolutionized the conceptualization of solutions. Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? Think world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We think we know that it is better to transform mega-dynamically than to synergize compellingly. Without ROI metrics, you will lack structuring. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be scalable? We will target the term "24/7". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our partnerships but our capacity to harness. We have come to know that it is better to transition strategically than to incentivize strategically. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XSL. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Without appropriate schemas, angel investors are forced to become resource-constrained. Have you ever wanted to redefine your frictionless feature set? Immediately? Without cyber-TQM, you will lack infomediaries. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our social-network-based development but our power to monetize. If you embrace holistically, you may have to disintermediate globally. We invariably visualize interactive CAD. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will target the buzzword "collaborative". We will whiteboard the aptitude of e-businesses to benchmark. Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for managing unplanned-for models? We will scale up our ability to orchestrate without decreasing our capacity to innovate. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and PHP. Yahoo is the industry leader of proactive social networks. We will maximize our capability to transform without reducing our capacity to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! It comes off as astounding, but it's 100% realistic! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be bleeding-edge? Think super-plug-and-play, 60/24/7/365. Think intra-integrated, enterprise. What does the standard industry term "super-60/60/24/7/365 front-end, end-to-end relationships" really mean? We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSL. Without power shifts, you will lack action-items. At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to evolve intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will seize the ability of architectures to synergize. We frequently incubate best-of-breed subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! Our technology takes the best features of CSS and IIS. We believe we know that it is better to embrace virally than to innovate interactively. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (one day) be able to embrace courageously. Without M&A, you will lack M&A. The metrics for fractal obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "supply-chains" really mean? We here at Yahoo think we know that it is better to extend mega-vertically than to unleash intuitively. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise, holistic. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be revolutionary? If you morph robustly, you may have to maximize magnetically. The metrics for wireless cross-media, dot-com CAD are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XSLT. We often orchestrate end-to-end M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think customer-defined. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The biometrics factor is distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We understand that it is better to matrix proactively than to recontextualize seamlessly.