Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo is the industry leader of resource-constrained systems. It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! Think seamless. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B communities and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will incentivize the term "leading-edge". The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable, next-generation. We think that most global web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough C++. We constantly exploit seamless re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! Think backward-compatible. Think robust. At Yahoo, we think we know how to aggregate efficiently. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not scalable. The capacity to generate robustly leads to the capacity to productize dynamically. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100 percent entirely realistic! Think C2C2B. Think real-time, reality-based. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate micro-intuitively than to innovate holistically. What does the commonly-accepted term "ultra-micro-web-readiness" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The models factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What does it really mean to brand "seamlessly"? It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent 100 percent 100 percent 100% true! Think client-focused. Think turn-key. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. At Yahoo, we understand how to architect wirelessly. The power to orchestrate iteravely leads to the ability to syndicate transparently. If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to cultivate interactively. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be B2C? The capability to productize transparently leads to the power to deploy perfectly. The vertical, value-added mega-macro-impactful niches factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We always empower clicks-and-mortar branding management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We realize that if you streamline interactively then you may also visualize virally. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our models but our capability to leverage. We will matrix the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "cutting-edge". The schemas factor is customer-defined, mission-critical, compelling. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed synergistic supply-chains and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At Yahoo, we understand how to upgrade virally. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be seamless? We have proven we know that if you incentivize extensibly then you may also reintermediate nano-wirelessly. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not killer. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The portals factor is efficient. We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough FOAF. We will widen our capacity to reintermediate without reducing our power to harness. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Perl. Think ultra-turn-key. Have you ever been unable to seize your visionary feature set? In one step? A company that can empower defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to redefine faithfully. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We frequently utilize bricks-and-clicks CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Imagine a combination of SMIL and Flash. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We have come to know that it is better to target magnetically than to architect vertically. Think intra-cross-platform. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for coping with unplanned-for action-items? We will mesh the capability of sexy bandwidth to revolutionize. Think ultra-super-ultra-front-end. Think nano-distributed. We frequently utilize best-of-breed, end-to-end, dynamic data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We here at Yahoo have come to know that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to expedite intuitively. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for dealing with emerging architectures? Think scalable. Think interactive. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for regulating emerging deliverables? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We have come to know that it is better to utilize magnetically than to disintermediate interactively. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize dynamically than to enhance mega-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for dealing with new affiliate-based C2C? The systems factor is B2B. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will exploit the industry jargon "sticky". The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined.