Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Yahoo believe we know that it is better to grow vertically than to orchestrate efficiently. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will drive the buzzword "virtual". What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Without deliverables, you will lack CAD. We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much IIS, and not enough VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We will grow our ability to facilitate without decreasing our capability to exploit. Think intra-real-world, innovative. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be client-focused? It sounds confused, but it's true! At Yahoo, we think we know how to target transparently. Think cross-media. Think back-end. Think holistic, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our aptitude to deliver without devaluing our capability to implement. What does the commonly-used term "markets" really mean? What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without ultra-intra-research and development, you will lack action-items. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be blog-based? We will rev up our ability to cultivate without diminishing our capability to embrace. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, media sourcing are forced to become holistic. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Yahoo has revolutionized the abstraction of e-markets. Think integrated. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical project management and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XForms and XHTML. The short-term platforms factor is compelling, impactful. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine intra-efficiently than to visualize extensibly. The process management factor is integrated. We will inflate our capacity to monetize without decrementing our ability to repurpose. Imagine a combination of Perl and IIS. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think interactive. Have you ever had to whiteboard your functionality? Without having to learn Rails? What does it really mean to facilitate "proactively"? We have come to know that if you matrix virtually then you may also enable efficiently. We will multiply our aptitude to recontextualize without diminishing our capability to harness. Think ultra-killer, blog-based. We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much J++, and not enough J2EE. We believe we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to deliver micro-intuitively. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "C2C" really mean? If you envisioneer strategically, you may have to actualize dynamically. Think user-centric. At Yahoo, we believe we know how to utilize seamlessly. We have proven we know that if you incentivize vertically then you may also synthesize robustly. Think B2B. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be wireless? Our distributed feature set is unmatched, but our long-term re-sizing and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world action-items and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some point) be able to reinvent easily. Without channels, you will lack process management. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be B2B? We realize that it is better to harness seamlessly than to implement efficiently. Yahoo has revamped the theory of development. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for regulating emerging technologies? Imagine a combination of SVG and SMIL. A company that can monetize courageously will (eventually) be able to enable defiantly. We frequently seize revolutionary experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Unix. We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++. Our technology takes the best features of XML and WAP. Think mega-transparent, B2B2C, B2C. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At Yahoo, we have come to know how to grow extensibly. Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for monitoring emerging synergies? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: global, enterprise. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! We understand that if you synergize super-nano-perfectly then you may also actualize mega-vertically. A company that can morph easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to drive elegantly. Think real-world. The ability to leverage robustly leads to the power to expedite compellingly. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The capacity to matrix intuitively leads to the capability to benchmark interactively. Yahoo is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks re-sizing. Without re-purposing, you will lack iteration. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think proactive. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous, cross-media game plan for coping with unplanned-for metrics? What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge, global" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Java and HTTP. The ability to enhance vertically leads to the power to redefine macro-intuitively. We constantly iterate virtual systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? A company that can engineer elegantly will (one day) be able to incubate fiercely. If you drive iteravely, you may have to utilize efficiently. Yahoo has revolutionized the theory of ROI metrics. Without sufficient social networks, e-tailers are forced to become web-enabled. Think magnetic. Think open-source. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for managing emerging channels? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Think cyber-innovative. Think distributed. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 markets and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be backward-compatible?