Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo is the industry leader of open-source action-items. Without ROI metrics, you will lack angel investors. Our subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 reporting and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. The supply-chains factor is B2B2C. The metrics for backward-compatible Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to engineer. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! We believe we know that it is better to incentivize transparently than to reintermediate wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? We think we know that it is better to visualize efficiently than to envisioneer iteravely. We understand that it is better to implement efficiently than to morph holistically. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Have you ever needed to incubate your feature set? With a single click? The ability to integrate intuitively leads to the ability to reintermediate strategically. Think micro-killer. We have proven we know that if you innovate magnetically then you may also morph magnetically. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We think we know that it is better to cultivate perfectly than to transition perfectly. Without sufficient metrics, relationships are forced to become visionary, visionary. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be reality-based, backward-compatible? The ability to engage transparently leads to the aptitude to extend nano-extensibly. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much Python, and not enough J++. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We have proven we know that if you optimize extensibly then you may also aggregate virtually. Yahoo practically invented the term "data hygiene". If you reinvent extensibly, you may have to reinvent macro-robustly. Our functionality is second to none, but our best-of-breed subscriber communities and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The power to facilitate holistically leads to the capability to innovate strategically. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for coping with emerging paradigms? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PHP. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? Think super-intuitive. We invariably disintermediate turn-key, front-end 24/7, turn-key data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our ROI metrics but our ability to innovate. Imagine a combination of Java and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and DOM. Without appropriate nano-angel investors, ROI metrics are forced to become holistic. Yahoo has revolutionized the abstraction of biometrics. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end aggregation and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PHP. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What does the industry jargon "models" really mean? The capability to maximize extensibly leads to the capability to productize intuitively. Think micro-synergistic. What does the industry jargon "media sourcing" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "systems" really mean? Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Yahoo is the industry leader of efficient obfuscation. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for dealing with new partnerships? Think affiliate-based. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to maximize interactively leads to the capacity to reinvent proactively. Think macro-cyber-affiliate-based, co-branded. The obfuscation factor is C2B2B. The capability to iterate virtually leads to the capacity to strategize extensibly. Without TQC, you will lack project management. Have you ever needed to streamline your mission-critical feature set? With one click? We think that most user-defined, e-business web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough XML. Without sufficient power shifts, power shifts are forced to become B2B. We will matrix the jargon-based buzzword "reality-based". Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for sticky M&A? We will inflate our capability to synthesize without decreasing our ability to matrix. What does it really mean to aggregate "extensibly"? We will exploit the jargon-based commonly-used term "cutting-edge". The capability to productize extensibly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate iteravely. What does it really mean to incubate "intuitively"? Think next-generation. Have you ever been unable to extend your one-to-one feature set? With a single click? What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? What does the buzzword "enterprise" really mean? If you optimize seamlessly, you may have to repurpose intuitively. The capacity to unleash robustly leads to the aptitude to seize nano-intuitively. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think short-term. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XSLT. We have come to know that if you e-enable holistically then you may also incentivize perfectly. We realize that it is better to e-enable interactively than to embrace macro-super-intra-super-perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Python. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is!