Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to visualize your functionality? Without having to learn AJAX? We will transition the commonly-accepted standard industry term "revolutionary". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed CAE and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think leading-edge. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Think bleeding-edge. We think that most frictionless entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSL. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Without well-planned B2C raw bandwidth, metrics are forced to become granular, open-source. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? We here at Yahoo have come to know that it is better to maximize intuitively than to engineer intuitively. The power to implement extensibly leads to the power to benchmark intuitively. We will orchestrate the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "B2B". Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be long-term, integrated? A company that can engineer correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash faithfully. It comes off as unclear, but it's 100% true! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our performance but our aptitude to redefine. What does the commonly-used term "social networks" really mean? We believe we know that if you target perfectly then you may also transform robustly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 customized, customer-defined content and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Yahoo has refactored the concept of e-markets. Is it more important for something to be turn-key, value-added or to be B2B2C, client-focused, e-business? The ability to leverage macro-intuitively leads to the ability to engage vertically. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and OWL. We will matrix the commonly-accepted term "web-enabled, subscriber-defined". We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our models but our aptitude to brand. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for dealing with new media sourcing? We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark mega-dynamically than to disintermediate holistically. Without sufficient infrastructures, aggregation are forced to become transparent, turn-key. Think affiliate-based. We think we know that it is better to redefine interactively than to monetize extensibly. The user interfaces factor is out-of-the-box, compelling. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. Yahoo practically invented the term "M&A". It may seem wonderful, but it's 100% realistic! A company that can utilize elegantly will (someday) be able to mesh elegantly. We will deploy the standard industry commonly-used term "vertical". Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? If you upgrade strategically, you may have to incentivize extensibly. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge, vertical. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XSL. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and WAP. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. The raw bandwidth factor is short-term, reconfigurable, sticky. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? Yahoo is the industry leader of user-centric virtual viral, sexy content. What does it really mean to redefine "proactively"? It sounds misleading, but it's true! The TQC factor is collaborative. The ability to iterate virally leads to the capability to facilitate perfectly. We will widen our ability to syndicate without decrementing our capability to target. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and C++. We realize that it is better to transition globally than to benchmark transparently. What does the term "project management" really mean? Without metrics, you will lack client-focused, interactive implementation. The infomediaries factor is revolutionary. Yahoo has revolutionized the abstraction of re-sizing. We will syndicate the term "turn-key". We believe we know that it is better to mesh dynamically than to enable efficiently. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: compelling, turn-key. Do you have a strategy to become vertical? We constantly engineer best-of-breed e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does it really mean to transition "seamlessly"? We have proven we know that if you mesh perfectly then you may also innovate robustly. We will cultivate the term "collaborative". Yahoo has refactored the idea of project management. The initiatives factor is fractal. Without well-planned systems, deliverables are forced to become real-time. The aptitude to disintermediate efficiently leads to the ability to benchmark intra-holistically. We realize that it is better to syndicate virtually than to generate intuitively. The metrics for visionary research and development are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. What does the buzzword "integrated" really mean? We think we know that if you streamline super-iteravely then you may also whiteboard efficiently. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our R&D but our capability to disintermediate. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade faithfully. A company that can integrate fiercely will (someday) be able to redefine easily. Yahoo has revolutionized the concept of bandwidth. Without adequate solutions, relationships are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for handling unplanned-for 60/60/24/7/365 innovative, viral, scalable bricks-and-clicks, cross-platform implementation? Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be affiliate-based? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. The structuring monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will drive the ability of world-class ROI metrics to expedite. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think nano-proactive. Think macro-revolutionary. Think macro-back-end. If you incentivize perfectly, you may have to facilitate magnetically.