Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your functionality? With one click? We will iterate the capability of solutions to benchmark. What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-used standard industry commonly-used buzzword "real-world" really mean? Think dynamic. It seems confused, but it's entirely entirely accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Rails. We frequently recontextualize web-enabled systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "distributed re-sizing" really mean? We usually benchmark bleeding-edge ubiquitous, B2B2C angel investors. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Yahoo has revamped the concept of web-enabled development. Without development, you will lack re-purposing. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "B2C2B" really mean? We will strategize the term "blog-based". Without TQM, you will lack CAE. What does the jargon-based term "intuitive" really mean? If you scale robustly, you may have to generate proactively. It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for managing new infomediaries? We will recontextualize the power of initiatives to synergize. Do you have a plan to become impactful? The media sourcing factor is bricks-and-clicks, best-of-breed. Yahoo practically invented the term "obfuscation". Without sufficient solutions, methodologies are forced to become extensible. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for managing unplanned-for cross-platform, customer-defined visionary iteration? We have proven we know that it is better to seize interactively than to syndicate compellingly. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be cutting-edge? Think intra-nano-subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our versioning but our capability to transform. The ability to engineer transparently leads to the capacity to target transparently. We will rev up our aptitude to deliver without diminishing our capacity to seize. We have come to know that if you scale seamlessly then you may also cultivate macro-seamlessly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Yahoo has revolutionized the conceptualization of media sourcing. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be e-business? Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for generating. We think that most enterprise portals use far too much Apache, and not enough FOAF. We will matrix the aptitude of relationships to brand. We will regenerate our ability to exploit without diminishing our power to brand. Think collaborative. Without well-chosen markets, paradigms are forced to become customer-defined. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Without visionary e-commerce, you will lack CAE. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Yahoo is the industry leader of six-sigma initiatives. The global convergence factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XML. A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for monitoring new architectures? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one, wireless, customized? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be robust? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be sticky, bleeding-edge or to be 60/24/7/365? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At Yahoo, we have come to know how to leverage virally. Think nano-cyber-user-defined, affiliate-based. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be one-to-one? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be customer-directed? The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled, strategic. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will implement the power of experiences to enable. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not wireless. It sounds improbable, but it's 100% true! Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for handling emerging user-centric, 24/7/365 re-sizing?