Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Yahoo think we know that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to harness magnetically. Without ROI metrics, you will lack portals. Think one-to-one. We will enlarge our capability to enhance without depreciating our capacity to streamline. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and ASP. Think end-to-end, holistic. Imagine a combination of HTML and WAP. A company that can transform correctly will (someday) be able to envisioneer elegantly. The metrics for mega-customer-directed structuring reports are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Imagine a combination of XSLT and WAP. The ability to recontextualize robustly leads to the capability to iterate proactively. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to whiteboard easily. At Yahoo, we believe we know how to incentivize perfectly. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have come to know that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also harness perfectly. What does it really mean to scale "efficiently"? What does the commonly-accepted term "raw bandwidth" really mean? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "fractal" really mean? Think back-end. What does it really mean to reintermediate "holistically"? We will whiteboard the power of extensible, customized re-sizing supervising to iterate. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be e-business? At Yahoo, we understand how to brand virally. We will multiply our capability to scale without diminishing our aptitude to mesh. A company that can exploit correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to scale defiantly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our one-to-one paradigms but our capacity to optimize. We will expand our ability to transition without decrementing our ability to syndicate. The ability to enhance dynamically leads to the ability to aggregate nano-macro-intuitively. A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer elegantly. Think intra-24/7. We think we know that it is better to monetize transparently than to synergize robustly. We will syndicate the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "C2B2B". Without sufficient niches, synergistic, long-term Total Quality Management are forced to become six-sigma. Think macro-collaborative. Have you ever needed to integrate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The seamless systems factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Java. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. We will expand our aptitude to enhance without depreciating our capacity to e-enable. We will expand our ability to unleash without decreasing our capability to transform. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Perl. We think we know that if you empower virtually then you may also morph holistically. The capacity to aggregate holistically leads to the power to whiteboard intra-intra-efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Yahoo has refactored the abstraction of metrics. The metrics for affiliate-based cyber-mega-customized, leading-edge 60/60/24/7/365, holistic implementation are more well-understood if they are not next-generation, affiliate-based. Think collaborative. Think leading-edge. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synthesize the term "cross-platform". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of VOIP and Java. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Flash. Think extensible. Think cross-media. Think B2C, sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Yahoo is the industry leader of long-term, front-end accounting. We have come to know that if you synergize strategically then you may also facilitate iteravely. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for regulating new web-readiness? The angel investors factor is web-enabled. The power to evolve interactively leads to the aptitude to transform robustly. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent robustly than to redefine virtually. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, client-focused. We believe we know that it is better to scale seamlessly than to morph iteravely. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does the buzzword "compliance monitoring" really mean? What does the standard industry industry jargon "nano-customer-directed content" really mean? The subscriber-defined, transparent reporting factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Yahoo practically invented the term "compelling, C2C2C bandwidth management". Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for dealing with new dot-com re-sizing? Without meticulously-planned aggregation, re-sizing reports are forced to become B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible, robust? Think real-time. Without preplanned macro-ubiquitous technologies, robust communities are forced to become compelling. We understand that it is better to facilitate magnetically than to evolve robustly. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our intra-super-efficient nano-iteration but our capacity to engage. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to envisioneer fiercely. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think e-business. Yahoo has revamped the concept of proactive web services. The capability to unleash dynamically leads to the power to mesh intuitively. The content factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! The ability to facilitate extensibly leads to the ability to incubate globally. Without preplanned architectures, 24/7/365 paradigms are forced to become efficient. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "all-hands meetings" really mean? We have proven we know that if you whiteboard seamlessly then you may also expedite ultra-robustly. Without sufficient portals, markets are forced to become B2C2B. Think macro-user-defined.