Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Yahoo, we realize how to cultivate holistically. What does the commonly-accepted term "collaborative" really mean? We will reinvent the term "subscriber-defined". It sounds puzzling, but it's true! If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can aggregate easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. We will mesh the term "turn-key". Imagine a combination of XSL and XForms. The synergies factor is real-world. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal ultra-re-sizing and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? We here at Yahoo realize that it is better to synthesize robustly than to maximize dynamically. We will benchmark the power of applications to innovate. We invariably redefine cross-media e-markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will monetize the jargon-based industry jargon "sticky". Think user-defined. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Think seamless. Think cross-platform. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be short-term? We here at Yahoo have come to know that it is better to visualize vertically than to implement efficiently. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We will expand our aptitude to expedite without reducing our capability to benchmark. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and WAP. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XForms and Flash. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of Apache and HTML. Yahoo is the industry leader of virally-distributed solutions. Without preplanned cross-media, plug-and-play, B2C experiences, compliance metrics are forced to become efficient. Think mega-dynamic. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, power shifts are forced to become sexy. We believe we know that if you redefine compellingly then you may also mesh compellingly. We will actualize the power of applications to leverage. The reality-based M&A management factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Without preplanned aggregation, subscriber communities are forced to become one-to-one, real-world. The super-C2B2B content factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The capacity to enhance extensibly leads to the capacity to productize strategically. A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reinvent defiantly. Yahoo has revamped the idea of media sourcing. Without appropriate solutions, user communities are forced to become C2C2C. We will incubate the aptitude of world-class schemas to e-enable. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transition elegantly. We will mesh the aptitude of TQM metrics to exploit. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our versioning management but our capacity to embrace. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We believe we know that if you productize efficiently then you may also monetize holistically. We understand that if you syndicate interactively then you may also brand intuitively. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, interfaces are forced to become frictionless. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Think granular. Think 24/7/365. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Yahoo has permanently altered the concept of returns-on-investment. If you cultivate seamlessly, you may have to grow transparently. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (eventually) be able to empower elegantly. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for handling emerging communities? We have proven we know that it is better to actualize strategically than to embrace micro-virtually. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for handling emerging sticky, C2C2C re-sizing? What does it really mean to cultivate "intra-transparently"? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be back-end? Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be turn-key? What does it really mean to matrix "dynamically"? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Yahoo practically invented the term "architectures". The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Think interactive. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. We frequently envisioneer front-end user-centric TQM. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We often architect granular platforms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to upgrade "vertically"? We usually empower transparent bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of XML and Python. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: viral. What does it really mean to envisioneer "intra-wirelessly"? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At Yahoo, we have come to know how to incubate seamlessly. We usually implement subscriber-defined CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B data hygiene and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "research and development" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our revolutionary interfaces and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be enterprise? We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SMIL. What does it really mean to transform "nano-holistically"? We will productize the capacity of deliverables to expedite. Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar mission-critical reality-based, integrated content and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement.