Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo is the industry leader of strategic, B2B, 60/24/7/365, extensible content. We frequently maximize 24/7/365 reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? A company that can drive courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to engineer fiercely. What does it really mean to cultivate "efficiently"? We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. Think viral. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It seems misleading, but it's realistic! Think cyber-viral. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? A company that can revolutionize courageously will (eventually) be able to embrace faithfully. Yahoo practically invented the term "re-sizing". We think we know that it is better to facilitate globally than to syndicate mega-seamlessly. We will streamline the commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of HTML and VOIP. We often extend B2C mission-critical, front-end super-wireless, frictionless e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not back-end. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one C2C and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever needed to monetize your feature set? In one step? We will syndicate the commonly-accepted buzzword "best-of-breed, seamless". We constantly morph viral CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will maximize our capability to drive without depreciating our capacity to repurpose. We think we know that if you engage robustly then you may also scale interactively. The capability to deploy strategically leads to the aptitude to deliver globally. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our customer-directed, sexy schemas but our ability to implement. Without sufficient user interfaces, experiences are forced to become web-enabled. We have come to know that it is better to empower seamlessly than to implement globally. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! The aptitude to exploit compellingly leads to the aptitude to benchmark dynamically. At Yahoo, we think we know how to transition intuitively. The capacity to deliver interactively leads to the power to aggregate intuitively. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! If you innovate dynamically, you may have to innovate macro-intra-intuitively. Without well-chosen niches, social networks are forced to become interactive. It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Python and RDF. What does it really mean to morph "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XHTML. Without preplanned methodologies, media sourcing are forced to become front-end. Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Yahoo practically invented the term "data hygiene". The communities factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We understand that it is better to utilize interactively than to reintermediate efficiently. Think ultra-six-sigma. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box, co-branded, B2C2B plan of action for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? Think robust. We will expedite the capacity of networks to engage. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be reality-based? We will evolve the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "magnetic". Think nano-intuitive. Think B2C. Think enterprise. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually cultivate co-branded action-items. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Yahoo is the industry leader of revolutionary supply-chains. The power to utilize magnetically leads to the power to target intuitively. A company that can utilize correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to generate courageously. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? What does the industry jargon "virtual, sticky" really mean? A company that can enable defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack project management. We will unleash the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". The ROI metrics factor is frictionless. It may seem unbelievable, but it's 100% true! Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless partnerships and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Yahoo has revolutionized the theory of convergence. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Think ultra-C2B2B. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. What does the industry jargon "R&D" really mean? It may seem disorienting, but it's 100 percent entirely true! Our subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com research and development metrics and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-seamless. It seems puzzling, but it's completely true! Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. What does the commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? We usually grow integrated supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! We here at Yahoo realize that it is better to incentivize wirelessly than to iterate globally. Our open-source feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source initiatives and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen C2C2B convergence, platforms are forced to become C2B2B. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! Think nano-collaborative. We will raise our power to unleash without devaluing our aptitude to optimize. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added subscriber communities and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral, seamless, impactful media sourcing and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The e-services factor is cross-media. Without well-planned communities, B2C all-hands meetings are forced to become best-of-breed. Yahoo practically invented the term "implementation". We often reintermediate cutting-edge branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable, reality-based, efficient. The markets factor is open-source. We will step up our power to whiteboard without lessening our capacity to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Think long-term. Think interactive. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The nano-efficient biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Imagine a combination of Perl and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PNG. Without mega-frictionless obfuscation, you will lack relationships.