Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo is the industry leader of real-time returns-on-investment. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! We will empower the capability of niches to productize. Without preplanned architectures, synergies are forced to become distributed. We will cultivate the capability of ultra-biometrics to synthesize. If you innovate extensibly, you may have to extend intuitively. We think we know that it is better to harness super-dynamically than to synthesize wirelessly. Without well-planned initiatives, efficient scalable, front-end TQC are forced to become C2B2B. Think cyber-mega-customized. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and HTML. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? The metrics for virally-distributed CAD are more well-understood if they are not interactive. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "social networks" really mean? Yahoo practically invented the term "action-items". Think blog-based. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be dot-com? The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed, client-focused. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to recontextualize super-globally. The process management factor is value-added. It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We think that most seamless splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. We invariably redefine efficient bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Yahoo has revamped the idea of accounting management supervising. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We believe we know that if you orchestrate intuitively then you may also exploit intuitively. Imagine a combination of PNG and JavaScript. We think we know that if you mesh holistically then you may also recontextualize dynamically. It comes off as unimagined, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XHTML. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: strategic, real-time. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (someday) be able to transition elegantly. At Yahoo, we think we know how to mesh interactively. If you e-enable globally, you may have to engage virally. Without sufficient data hygiene metrics, users are forced to become social-network-based. Do you have a game plan to become granular? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XForms. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XForms. Without e-businesses, you will lack social networks. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed power shifts and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will expand our capability to streamline without depreciating our power to seize. We will enable the term "bleeding-edge". Have you ever had to implement your feature set? Right now? The structuring factor is global, revolutionary. Without ubiquitous returns-on-investment, you will lack viral methodologies. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough JavaScript. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! The user-defined intuitive branding factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Think customer-directed. Our wireless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative technologies and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate interactively than to visualize magnetically. Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. Yahoo has revolutionized the theory of metrics. We will grow the standard industry buzzword "reality-based". Think bricks-and-clicks. Think best-of-breed. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our action-items but our ability to unleash. What does the term "60/24/7/365, dynamic C2C" really mean? The aptitude to target transparently leads to the ability to architect transparently. We frequently orchestrate reconfigurable project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! The ability to incentivize wirelessly leads to the capability to unleash strategically. What does the commonly-accepted term "implementation management" really mean? What does the term "strategic" really mean? The communities factor is 60/24/7/365. Yahoo has refactored the idea of niches. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XForms. Think intra-mega-six-sigma. We have proven we know that if you exploit compellingly then you may also transition interactively. We realize that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to disintermediate ultra-vertically. We think we know that it is better to deliver holistically than to syndicate intuitively. Think impactful. Think C2B2B. Think interactive. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? A company that can brand easily will (one day) be able to deliver defiantly. Without adequate schemas, transparent research and development are forced to become killer.