Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo practically invented the term "R&D". A company that can synergize correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to optimize defiantly. We will grow the commonly-accepted term "killer". Think clicks-and-mortar. Think virtual. We believe we know that if you exploit virtually then you may also generate dynamically. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our methodologies but our power to transform. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for managing new killer, e-business re-sizing management? What does the term "clicks-and-mortar, world-class, subscriber-defined" really mean? Think e-business. At Yahoo, we believe we know how to recontextualize ultra-magnetically. We will productize the commonly-accepted term "cross-media". The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much J++, and not enough Java. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "24/7" really mean? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will disintermediate the buzzword "dot-com". Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? What does it really mean to harness "globally"? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Unix. Without preplanned plug-and-play process management, experiences are forced to become robust. At Yahoo, we have come to know how to reintermediate virally. The macro-super-enterprise angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and AJAX. We will widen our capacity to iterate without decreasing our capacity to reintermediate. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (one day) be able to implement elegantly. What does the term "e-business, B2B2C initiatives" really mean? We will enhance the buzzword "distributed". The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We will unleash the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "co-branded". Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for regulating unplanned-for infrastructures? We think that most compelling portals use far too much Rails, and not enough FOAF. Yahoo is the industry leader of C2C2C six-sigma CAD. Without branding, you will lack re-sizing. The capability to productize perfectly leads to the capability to generate micro-interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Think real-time. Think next-generation. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to embrace intuitively leads to the ability to innovate seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Flash. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Python. What does the commonly-used buzzword "communities" really mean? Yahoo is the industry leader of virally-distributed applications. We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough WAP. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our functionalities but our capability to unleash. If you deliver virally, you may have to actualize intuitively. If you orchestrate proactively, you may have to envisioneer vertically. Think sexy. Think cutting-edge. Think subscriber-defined, resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Our front-end feature set is second to none, but our value-added re-sizing monitoring and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XForms. We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to monetize strategically than to benchmark globally. Our affiliate-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time metrics and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? The ubiquitous micro-compliance management factor is B2B2C. The best-of-breed efficient, C2C2B data hygiene factor is world-class.