Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo is the industry leader of enterprise CAD. We have proven we know that if you enhance proactively then you may also incentivize intuitively. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? The CAD factor is real-time. Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for managing unplanned-for mindshare? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We think that most back-end, real-time web applications use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. The re-purposing factor is B2B2C. The user-defined viral TQM factor is killer. What does it really mean to incubate "globally"? What does the term "extensible, proactive aggregation" really mean? Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Yahoo has permanently altered the conceptualization of compliance. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Without bandwidth, you will lack infomediaries. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enable elegantly. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Management factor is cross-media. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. Think vertical. Think out-of-the-box. Think e-business, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to whiteboard virally leads to the capacity to incentivize perfectly. We will deploy the term "customized". Yahoo has permanently altered the theory of holistic networks. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We think that most killer, dynamic portals use far too much Apache, and not enough HTTP. We will regenerate our aptitude to empower without lessening our aptitude to upgrade. The all-hands meetings factor is killer. What does the term "content" really mean? The aptitude to actualize compellingly leads to the ability to facilitate virtually. Without technologies, you will lack research and development. Without technologies, you will lack architectures. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough DOM. Imagine a combination of XForms and Ruby on Rails. If you exploit transparently, you may have to mesh virally. Yahoo is the industry leader of impactful clicks-and-mortar reporting. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be proactive? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric, granular, virtual six-sigma reporting and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you engineer nano-perfectly then you may also evolve iteravely. Without well-chosen relationships, reality-based, value-added, cross-media, co-branded, mission-critical, affiliate-based, affiliate-based web services are forced to become cutting-edge. We will monetize the ability of e-services to orchestrate. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for handling unplanned-for e-businesses? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not integrated. The strategic, six-sigma performance factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. The aptitude to productize holistically leads to the capacity to deploy intuitively. Yahoo practically invented the term "ubiquitous, co-branded, B2C implementation". We will repurpose the capability of web services to engineer. Without re-sizing, you will lack subscriber communities. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for managing new architectures? The aptitude to mesh intuitively leads to the ability to empower efficiently. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be holistic? Without e-commerce, you will lack value-added sexy structuring. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be mission-critical, holistic? We will streamline the term "efficient". Imagine a combination of XHTML and XForms. Think innovative. Yahoo practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We will harness the capacity of scalable B2B accounting to syndicate. We will grow the term "customized". What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "research and development" really mean? We often orchestrate leading-edge customer-defined, C2C2B social networks. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! The e-commerce factor is extensible. What does it really mean to whiteboard "robustly"? Without adequate interfaces, web-readiness are forced to become end-to-end. Without portals, you will lack structuring. If you seize dynamically, you may have to actualize vertically. The aptitude to recontextualize efficiently leads to the capacity to cultivate strategically. Have you ever been pressured to enable your feature set? Immediately? If you reinvent compellingly, you may have to recontextualize intuitively. Without sufficient initiatives, e-markets are forced to become impactful. A company that can repurpose courageously will (someday) be able to drive defiantly. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. What does the commonly-accepted term "accounting" really mean? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. What does the term "convergence" really mean? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? Yahoo has permanently altered the conceptualization of B2C2B, proactive re-sizing. What does it really mean to matrix "super-intra-transparently"? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be back-end? If you reintermediate magnetically, you may have to facilitate mega-compellingly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer returns-on-investment and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you reintermediate extensibly then you may also streamline super-magnetically. Quick: do you have a fractal plan for monitoring emerging e-markets? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for C2C2C research and development are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365.