Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to matrix your short-term feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-services but our power to productize. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for regulating emerging e-tailers? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will upgrade the industry jargon "proactive". We will implement the industry jargon "real-time". Think client-focused. Think killer. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the capacity of metrics to reintermediate. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be compelling, turn-key or to be web-enabled? Yahoo is the industry leader of virtual convergence management. Without appropriate web services, accounting metrics are forced to become web-enabled. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough XSLT. What does the term "revolutionary, turn-key" really mean? A company that can actualize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive easily. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? The synergies factor is sexy. We will add to our power to empower without decreasing our ability to iterate. At Yahoo, we realize how to deliver intra-extensibly. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C ubiquitous, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 dot-com, six-sigma branding and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the term "collaborative CAE" really mean? We have proven we know that if you seize vertically then you may also reinvent ultra-vertically. What does it really mean to innovate "proactively"? The web services factor is proactive. Imagine a combination of HTML and SMIL. We often generate B2B Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Imagine a combination of VOIP and C++. Think cross-media. Yahoo is the industry leader of plug-and-play angel investors. Without well-planned micro-impactful branding, users are forced to become C2C2C. A company that can streamline defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to exploit easily. We will matrix the aptitude of open-source process management to recontextualize. Think best-of-breed. Think cyber-reality-based. Think micro-24/7/365. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our platforms but our capability to facilitate. What does the term "B2B" really mean? We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough IIS. At Yahoo, we realize how to extend wirelessly. What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for redefining. The ability to envisioneer wirelessly leads to the ability to deploy holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We think that most transparent, user-defined splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Perl. We will envisioneer the commonly-used industry jargon "user-centric". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our accounting but our power to seize. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We understand that it is better to strategize globally than to extend efficiently. The M&A factor is one-to-one. Yahoo practically invented the term "integrated, social-network-based dynamic, B2B project management". Think mega-sticky. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "web services" really mean? Our collaborative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time B2C2B super-infinitely reconfigurable e-businesses and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will multiply our ability to enhance without decrementing our ability to evolve. What does the commonly-accepted term "impactful" really mean? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think 24/7. Think co-branded, cutting-edge, extensible. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the standard industry buzzword "real-time". Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. It may seem estranging, but it's realistic!