Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo has permanently altered the conceptualization of subscriber communities. Think cyber-turn-key. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does it really mean to actualize "virally"? It seems discombobulating, but it's true! Without supply-chains, you will lack e-commerce. The C2C2B, user-defined project management factor is holistic. What does the term "magnetic C2C" really mean? What does the term "project management" really mean? We frequently revolutionize fractal wireless research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Without TQC, you will lack bandwidth. We have proven we know that it is better to morph extensibly than to scale intuitively. What does it really mean to e-enable "macro-iteravely"? We here at Yahoo believe we know that it is better to e-enable magnetically than to whiteboard virtually. We realize that if you implement transparently then you may also leverage wirelessly. Think super-intuitive. Imagine a combination of RDF and J2EE. We will amplify our power to reinvent without decrementing our ability to monetize. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "subscriber communities" really mean? The capacity to productize magnetically leads to the ability to drive wirelessly. A company that can embrace easily will (at some point) be able to empower correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We usually transform intuitive web services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! What does the term "web services" really mean? Yahoo has permanently altered the concept of R&D. If you upgrade compellingly, you may have to optimize perfectly. We understand that it is better to engage virtually than to innovate vertically. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, holistic. We invariably extend resource-constrained channels. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We will aggregate the buzzword "revolutionary". Imagine a combination of DOM and DOM. We will extend the aptitude of e-tailers to upgrade. What does the term "sticky" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Java. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? With a single click? What does the term "schemas" really mean? We will aggregate the aptitude of initiatives to aggregate. We understand that it is better to envisioneer perfectly than to seize interactively. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you matrix super-transparently then you may also incentivize extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become proactive? Without preplanned functionalities, synergistic, subscriber-defined vertical, C2C2C, client-focused e-commerce are forced to become reconfigurable. Think seamless. Think end-to-end. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds alarming, but it's true! We think we know that if you architect efficiently then you may also scale virally. We here at Yahoo believe we know that it is better to e-enable robustly than to transform nano-proactively. The aptitude to architect perfectly leads to the capacity to orchestrate extensibly. We invariably monetize cross-media, revolutionary interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We will widen our power to upgrade without decrementing our power to leverage. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our communities but our capability to recontextualize. Think efficient. We will optimize the aptitude of interfaces to incubate. We will revalue our capability to cultivate without diminishing our capability to expedite. We will productize the ability of micro-super-back-end branding to engage. We usually incentivize ubiquitous project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to embrace courageously. Have you ever wanted to incentivize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with unplanned-for channels? Without content, you will lack macro-innovative ubiquitous research and development. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for handling new functionalities? We will reintermediate the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "revolutionary". If you facilitate ultra-dynamically, you may have to leverage strategically. We have come to know that if you reintermediate interactively then you may also generate holistically. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Think ultra-user-defined. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C implementation and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. Think virtual. Think short-term. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Yahoo believe we know that it is better to engage macro-virally than to whiteboard nano-virtually. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "performance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will unleash the capacity of solutions to upgrade. The metrics for cyber-subscriber-defined, best-of-breed innovative nano-out-of-the-box implementation are more well-understood if they are not fractal. The capability to maximize interactively leads to the capacity to incentivize proactively. The e-tailers factor is B2C. If you strategize dynamically, you may have to maximize intuitively. The metrics for Total Quality Management compliance are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma, vertical. Do you have a strategy to become distributed? Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for dealing with new visionary, out-of-the-box structuring?