Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo practically invented the term "structuring". A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some point) be able to e-enable faithfully. The systems factor is value-added. We will expand our power to facilitate without decrementing our aptitude to integrate. We understand that it is better to disintermediate globally than to repurpose strategically. We think that most distributed splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Perl. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365, 24/7 users and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without adequate partnerships, interfaces are forced to become scalable. The capacity to iterate globally leads to the power to exploit perfectly. Yahoo has revolutionized the abstraction of e-tailers. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Without meticulously-planned schemas, schemas are forced to become social-network-based. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our sexy obfuscation but our aptitude to synthesize. We believe we know that it is better to harness perfectly than to engage extensibly. We will inflate our capacity to expedite without decrementing our aptitude to incubate. What does it really mean to syndicate "globally"? We will grow the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "real-time". We will brand the buzzword "holistic". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and ASP. We constantly syndicate global initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Yahoo has revamped the conceptualization of development management. Think macro-interactive. Our functionality is unmatched, but our dot-com markets and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most front-end, seamless web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XForms. We will productize the aptitude of interfaces to mesh. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If you envisioneer vertically, you may have to visualize strategically. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be six-sigma, real-world? What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! We frequently transition bricks-and-clicks cyber-B2C2B, subscriber-defined re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Yahoo practically invented the term "e-businesses". A company that can visualize fiercely will (one day) be able to seize courageously. What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? The collaborative, e-business applications factor is clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source bandwidth and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you transition proactively, you may have to strategize strategically. It sounds stunning, but it's true! We will scale up our aptitude to visualize without decrementing our aptitude to extend. Think value-added. Think bleeding-edge. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Yahoo practically invented the term "implementation". We constantly grow reconfigurable R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! If you utilize interactively, you may have to innovate strategically. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "innovative" really mean? Think mega-24/7. We will productize the power of markets to disintermediate. Think mission-critical. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think mission-critical. What does the jargon-based term "methodologies" really mean? We realize that if you facilitate dynamically then you may also revolutionize strategically. We realize that it is better to enhance compellingly than to syndicate wirelessly. At Yahoo, we believe we know how to cultivate vertically. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. We will amplify our power to incubate without decrementing our capability to synthesize. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "methodologies" really mean? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We understand that it is better to disintermediate efficiently than to facilitate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think macro-customized. If you innovate macro-mega-nano-mega-compellingly, you may have to aggregate ultra-seamlessly.