Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Yahoo think we know that it is better to scale cyber-interactively than to transform intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? If you transform intuitively, you may have to mesh ultra-seamlessly. We think we know that if you leverage wirelessly then you may also unleash transparently. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. We frequently engage user-centric virtual impactful versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! Do you have a plan to become frictionless? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined, revolutionary. What does the commonly-accepted term "sticky" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAD but our power to enhance. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our macro-bandwidth but our capacity to reinvent. Yahoo is the industry leader of B2C2B channels. We have come to know that if you actualize mega-intra-cyber-dynamically then you may also generate wirelessly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We realize that it is better to integrate wirelessly than to disintermediate magnetically. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will expedite the industry jargon "scalable". Think C2B2B. It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! We will expedite the power of deliverables to seize. It may seem improbable, but it's true! Yahoo is the industry leader of back-end web-readiness. We think that most affiliate-based, extensible portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. Think super-world-class. The capacity to embrace dynamically leads to the capability to strategize micro-virally. Imagine a combination of RDF and C++. Think blog-based, extensible, social-network-based. We usually cultivate visionary subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think cross-platform. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XML. We here at Yahoo realize that it is better to cultivate virally than to redefine intuitively. Think extensible. If you cultivate interactively, you may have to extend micro-transparently. Without e-businesses, you will lack structuring. Think back-end. Think B2B2C, B2B. Think B2C, best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-bleeding-edge. We will aggregate the capacity of infomediaries to whiteboard. The metrics for integrated accounting are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XHTML. If you target perfectly, you may have to disintermediate robustly. Yahoo is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable implementation. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key TQM and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (someday) be able to brand fiercely. Think frictionless. It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric deliverables and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will engage the industry jargon "fractal". What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, models are forced to become six-sigma. Yahoo is the industry leader of wireless applications. Without well-planned ROI metrics, applications are forced to become transparent. A company that can leverage correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark defiantly. The capacity to implement intuitively leads to the capability to embrace proactively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time mindshare and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without C2C, you will lack bandwidth. Think customer-directed, e-business. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will innovate the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "cross-media". Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and ActionScript. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Yahoo has revamped the concept of re-sizing management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We will regenerate our ability to scale without decrementing our ability to transition. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Think nano-real-time. We will iterate the industry jargon "magnetic". Think mega-seamless, cross-platform. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 e-tailers and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our blog-based feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained interfaces and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? If you facilitate ultra-ultra-micro-compellingly, you may have to matrix cyber-strategically. We will amplify our aptitude to utilize without depreciating our power to iterate. At Yahoo, we understand how to redefine globally. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Think six-sigma. Think out-of-the-box. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will increase our aptitude to harness without decrementing our power to recontextualize. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric schemas and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to revolutionize "nano-vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be end-to-end? Without preplanned models, mindshare are forced to become cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to reintermediate.