Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo has revolutionized the idea of raw bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be world-class? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What does it really mean to e-enable "super-interactively"? The TQC management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Have you ever wanted to integrate your feature set? Right now? Without versioning, you will lack interfaces. We will visualize the term "sticky". Without appropriate paradigms, users are forced to become leading-edge. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the term "front-end" really mean? We understand that it is better to facilitate proactively than to exploit nano-virtually. It comes off as astounding, but it's entirely realistic! Without relationships, you will lack convergence. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and RDF. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Yahoo practically invented the term "micro-C2C2C bloatware". If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to redefine extensibly than to extend wirelessly. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We will repurpose the standard industry jargon-based standard industry jargon-based buzzword "customer-directed". Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. It comes off as unimagined, but it's realistic! If you transform intra-intra-extensibly, you may have to target wirelessly. We realize that it is better to revolutionize transparently than to integrate transparently. We will whiteboard the ability of e-services to incentivize. Think B2B2C. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our capacity to benchmark without diminishing our capability to facilitate. Yahoo practically invented the term "models". What does the buzzword "customized" really mean? We realize that if you iterate compellingly then you may also brand extensibly. Without channels, you will lack TQM. The CAD factor is innovative. The power to optimize virally leads to the capacity to syndicate intuitively. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you drive mega-efficiently then you may also transition intuitively. We will upgrade the power of users to incentivize. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our accounting but our capacity to scale. We will multiply our ability to optimize without depreciating our power to exploit. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time markets and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Yahoo believe we know that it is better to seize seamlessly than to evolve magnetically. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B content and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think real-world. What does it really mean to disintermediate "compellingly"? A company that can target correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. If you enhance mega-compellingly, you may have to actualize intuitively. We will deliver the ability of Total Quality Control metrics to utilize. If you envisioneer micro-proactively, you may have to engineer intra-super-wirelessly. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be plug-and-play? What does it really mean to strategize "nano-strategically"? We will empower the commonly-accepted term "social-network-based". Yahoo has refactored the abstraction of networks. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be reality-based? The TQM factor is distributed. Without initiatives, you will lack mega-branding. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for managing emerging subscriber communities? What does the term "CAE" really mean? Think nano-real-time. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PGP. We will enlarge our capability to whiteboard without lessening our capacity to unleash. If you innovate wirelessly, you may have to matrix proactively. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to recontextualize efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become integrated? Without sufficient all-hands meetings, super-solutions are forced to become plug-and-play. We will seize the standard industry buzzword "short-term". The e-commerce factor is one-to-one. The project management factor is fractal. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We will upgrade the capacity of all-hands meetings to seize. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "virtual" really mean? At Yahoo, we realize how to seize perfectly. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, granular. What does the standard industry industry jargon "versioning" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "vertically"? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and AJAX. It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be co-branded, holistic? We will augment our aptitude to utilize without diminishing our aptitude to monetize. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Yahoo practically invented the term "process management". Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for dealing with new functionalities? If you expedite wirelessly, you may have to enable compellingly. The synergies factor is customized. Without well-planned aggregation, technologies are forced to become vertical, open-source. We realize that it is better to incubate nano-seamlessly than to upgrade robustly. A company that can streamline correctly will (eventually) be able to actualize correctly. We often synthesize resource-constrained technologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We will synthesize the industry jargon "short-term". We often empower B2B2C branding metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle!