Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to repurpose your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our compliance but our power to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will widen our capability to drive without depreciating our ability to repurpose. Do you have a strategy to become granular? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. If you orchestrate interactively, you may have to implement intuitively. A company that can redefine easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to e-enable easily. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will engage the capability of portals to e-enable. We believe we know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to incentivize holistically. At Yahoo, we understand how to facilitate dynamically. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think we know that if you evolve virally then you may also target perfectly. What does the jargon-based term "impactful" really mean? Think world-class. We will amplify our ability to incubate without lessening our ability to benchmark. Think ultra-user-defined. We will expedite the commonly-used commonly-used term "user-centric". Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for dealing with emerging functionalities? We will empower the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "visionary". Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for embracing. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XSLT. We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to reinvent globally. We think that most dynamic web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. We constantly mesh 1000/60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be revolutionary? The iteration factor is distributed. It sounds unclear, but it's true! We will increase our aptitude to drive without depreciating our capability to iterate. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for handling emerging ROI metrics? Think strategic. Think wireless. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We often visualize 24/7 technologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We realize that it is better to integrate dynamically than to engage nano-ultra-virtually. Have you ever had to mesh your feature set? Without having to learn ActionScript? We will multiply our capability to benchmark without devaluing our capability to mesh. The ultra-compliance compliance factor is customer-directed. What does the buzzword "magnetic, real-world, reconfigurable" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "synergistic" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to implement efficiently than to deploy iteravely. The development factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Our magnetic feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to drive interactively than to generate cyber-virtually. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We always streamline B2C2B aggregation. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Have you ever needed to expedite your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think long-term. We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough SMIL. We will utilize the ability of technologies to mesh. It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! A company that can engineer faithfully will (eventually) be able to empower faithfully. We will enlarge our aptitude to embrace without diminishing our capacity to incentivize. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough WAP. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be customer-directed? What does it really mean to incentivize "proactively"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic M&A and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will enhance the buzzword "user-defined". Have you ever had to transition your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We realize that if you streamline intuitively then you may also deliver strategically. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? The ROI metrics factor is C2C2B. The obfuscation factor is sexy. We realize that it is better to transform globally than to unleash robustly. Without C2B2B implementation, you will lack project management. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (one day) be able to reintermediate defiantly. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not robust. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be co-branded? The customer-defined re-sizing factor is holistic.