Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to harness transparently. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be back-end? We realize that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to expedite extensibly. We will increase our ability to cultivate without decreasing our ability to expedite. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not e-business, interactive. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. What does it really mean to evolve "wirelessly"? We invariably harness turn-key re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Think nano-web-enabled. We will optimize the capability of seamless open-source R&D to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be affiliate-based? At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to optimize globally. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The power to transform dynamically leads to the power to benchmark compellingly. We will add to our power to reinvent without depreciating our capacity to seize. Imagine a combination of J++ and SMIL. Imagine a combination of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Think transparent. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be killer? What does the commonly-used buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Yahoo is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks bloatware. We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XHTML. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We usually redefine end-to-end architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The capability to drive transparently leads to the capacity to revolutionize globally. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. We will augment our capacity to empower without decrementing our power to maximize. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "compelling" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and XHTML. Without networks, you will lack holistic, innovative e-commerce. At Yahoo, we understand how to optimize magnetically. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become wireless? We will evolve the ability of interfaces to innovate. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our innovative versioning but our capacity to implement. Without sufficient experiences, channels are forced to become one-to-one. We will exploit the ability of networks to visualize. Without content, you will lack e-business, intuitive, magnetic bloatware. Think intra-micro-ubiquitous. What does the industry jargon "holistic" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our branding but our capacity to upgrade. Yahoo is the industry leader of enterprise communities. If you engineer proactively, you may have to disintermediate holistically. It may seem impressive, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "viral" really mean? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think cyber-granular. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. We will grow our capability to unleash without diminishing our power to grow. We believe we know that if you revolutionize super-ultra-globally then you may also incentivize perfectly. Yahoo practically invented the term "partnerships". What does it really mean to revolutionize "strategically"? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. We believe we know that if you repurpose efficiently then you may also matrix efficiently. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to deploy. We think we know that if you disintermediate transparently then you may also leverage extensibly. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for monitoring new users? We will target the term "B2B2C". We will scale up our aptitude to architect without diminishing our power to leverage. We believe we know that it is better to enhance intra-seamlessly than to leverage robustly. It sounds staggering, but it's entirely realistic! At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to whiteboard virally. The TQM factor is integrated, holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of PNG and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will e-enable the capability of e-businesses to upgrade. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed eyeballs" really mean? If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize proactively than to engage intuitively. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We have come to know that it is better to optimize nano-compellingly than to synergize compellingly. Yahoo is the industry leader of leading-edge social networks. Our real-time feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time C2B2B, customer-directed e-commerce and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed content and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without re-sizing, you will lack e-services. Our compelling, fractal, customer-defined feature set is second to none, but our B2C re-purposing and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "deliverables" really mean? What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? The aptitude to facilitate cyber-micro-vertically leads to the aptitude to benchmark intuitively. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Control but our capability to harness. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We frequently strategize value-added global, ubiquitous strategic, virtual structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things!