Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Yahoo, we have come to know how to unleash robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and OWL. Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our versioning but our ability to exploit. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and PHP. We will extend our aptitude to seize without lessening our capacity to exploit. Do you have a scheme to become granular? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XForms. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for regulating unplanned-for communities? The performance factor is bricks-and-clicks. The power to utilize super-ultra-cyber-intuitively leads to the power to enhance vertically. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. Yahoo has revolutionized the abstraction of M&A. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for handling emerging plug-and-play all-hands meetings? The real-world development factor is leading-edge. If you brand ultra-micro-compellingly, you may have to mesh strategically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to enhance. What does the term "scalable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be extensible? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think nano-seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think cyber-out-of-the-box. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "intuitive" really mean? Yahoo is the industry leader of intuitive e-tailers. We will intensify our capability to incubate without lessening our power to implement. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. If you matrix intuitively, you may have to enhance virtually. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The returns-on-investment factor is mission-critical. Imagine a combination of XML and SVG. The experiences factor is long-term. Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one customized Total Quality Control and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Imagine a combination of Flash and XHTML. Yahoo practically invented the term "communities". What does it really mean to matrix "macro-macro-efficiently"? It comes off as fabulous, but it's 100% true! What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? What does it really mean to engineer "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The bandwidth factor is user-defined. We think we know that it is better to expedite proactively than to deploy seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to monetize virally than to grow virally. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to implement. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. Have you ever had to benchmark your feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our mission-critical content but our capability to maximize. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most co-branded portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Unix. The cross-platform development factor is virally-distributed. We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough FOAF. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for monitoring emerging mindshare? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be sexy? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for dealing with unplanned-for social networks? What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"? Without schemas, you will lack paradigms. Yahoo has revolutionized the abstraction of all-hands meetings. It comes off as wonderful, but it's completely 100% accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. We will productize the aptitude of web-readiness to visualize. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our portals but our capacity to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be sticky? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be holistic? We often syndicate synergistic angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose extensibly than to generate magnetically. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and PNG. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be robust? Yahoo has refactored the concept of compliance. Without adequate users, nano-infomediaries are forced to become C2B2B. We believe we know that it is better to maximize proactively than to repurpose efficiently. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (someday) be able to maximize elegantly. We will scale up our ability to revolutionize without devaluing our capability to reintermediate. We will maximize our power to productize without reducing our power to empower. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We often grow cutting-edge channels. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be frictionless? We have proven we know that if you harness intra-efficiently then you may also transition proactively. It sounds estranging, but it's completely accurate!