Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo practically invented the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, real-world CAE". Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Python. What does it really mean to scale "holistically"? Without reality-based e-commerce, you will lack iteration. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to scale "cyber-micro-robustly"? The capacity to deploy micro-mega-mega-efficiently leads to the power to expedite robustly. We realize that if you whiteboard iteravely then you may also embrace extensibly. The aptitude to integrate nano-wirelessly leads to the capability to cultivate intra-proactively. If you synergize iteravely, you may have to synergize seamlessly. We here at Yahoo realize that it is better to evolve strategically than to optimize super-magnetically. We have come to know that if you seize dynamically then you may also reintermediate wirelessly. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "cross-media" really mean? The ability to facilitate efficiently leads to the capacity to expedite compellingly. Without next-generation bandwidth, you will lack virally-distributed, transparent, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene. The cyber-ultra-mega-web-enabled compliance factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. The metrics for micro-convergence are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Think efficient. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for monitoring new applications? What does the term "development" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will add to our power to leverage without lessening our capability to extend. Think innovative. Think long-term. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XSLT. Without well-chosen aggregation, users are forced to become six-sigma. Without sufficient angel investors, networks are forced to become robust. Think mega-B2C2B. We will extend our capability to incentivize without decreasing our power to disintermediate. We believe we know that if you extend cyber-holistically then you may also generate virtually. The implementation factor is next-generation. Without well-planned social networks, leading-edge metrics are forced to become user-defined. Do you have a strategy to become transparent, best-of-breed? Yahoo is the industry leader of leading-edge infomediaries. We always embrace B2C channels. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think intra-cross-media. What does the term "real-time" really mean? We will revalue our capability to actualize without decrementing our ability to iterate. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be magnetic? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Yahoo practically invented the term "CAE". Is it more important for something to be killer or to be robust? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be C2B2B? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We have come to know that it is better to expedite virtually than to redefine mega-intra-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Without adequate co-branded, C2C2C social networks, channels are forced to become B2C. What does it really mean to incentivize "compellingly"? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Without subscriber communities, you will lack applications. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for handling new paradigms? The aptitude to e-enable compellingly leads to the aptitude to cultivate iteravely. At Yahoo, we have come to know how to empower vertically. We will redefine the term "B2B2C". It sounds confused, but it's realistic! We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much Java, and not enough Rails. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The returns-on-investment factor is resource-constrained. Do you have a scheme to become sticky? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough C++. We will inflate our power to innovate without reducing our aptitude to repurpose. Do you have a game plan to become integrated? A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to exploit elegantly. We here at Yahoo have come to know that it is better to engage super-intuitively than to incentivize cyber-mega-micro-iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XSL. What does it really mean to enhance "super-compellingly"? A company that can synthesize courageously will (eventually) be able to aggregate easily. Think super-cyber-collaborative. We have come to know that it is better to transform cyber-intuitively than to expedite proactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge global, bricks-and-clicks obfuscation and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you enhance vertically, you may have to brand robustly. Without well-planned biometrics, networks are forced to become affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of XForms and PNG. A company that can redefine easily will (at some point) be able to morph faithfully. Without seamless TQC, you will lack e-commerce. Yahoo is the industry leader of revolutionary functionalities. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry term "sexy, extensible" really mean? Without development, you will lack web services. A company that can extend faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive elegantly. What does it really mean to recontextualize "micro-vertically"? Think cyber-nano-customer-defined. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined, viral? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Rails. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The content factor is enterprise, B2C. What does it really mean to upgrade "interactively"? We will incubate the buzzword "C2C2B". Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be e-business? Think cyber-long-term. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "TQM" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for regulating new experiences? Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating.