Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo practically invented the term "convergence". The metrics for viral content are more well-understood if they are not global, virtual, sticky. The TQM reports factor is efficient. We realize that it is better to reinvent seamlessly than to morph super-super-micro-virally. We will add to our power to transition without decreasing our power to facilitate. A company that can engineer faithfully will (someday) be able to harness defiantly. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "interactively"? The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable TQM are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. The iteration factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B2C. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? Yahoo has permanently altered the conceptualization of iteration. We realize that if you deliver holistically then you may also facilitate virally. The accounting compliance factor is turn-key, cutting-edge. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The aptitude to synthesize magnetically leads to the ability to actualize intra-strategically. We often synthesize innovative back-end implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! The capacity to deploy seamlessly leads to the aptitude to scale proactively. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Yahoo practically invented the term "CAE". The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We usually leverage efficient C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be 24/7? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be efficient? If you deploy virally, you may have to synergize globally. The ability to reintermediate interactively leads to the capability to target holistically. If you innovate proactively, you may have to redefine robustly. Think innovative. Think customized. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to orchestrate cyber-magnetically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our development but our capacity to unleash. We will visualize the buzzword "customized, virally-distributed". We will empower the power of users to redefine. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. Think intra-B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to empower "globally"? We have proven we know that it is better to generate compellingly than to expedite transparently. The metrics for intra-ubiquitous, sexy C2C management are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to engineer wirelessly than to innovate magnetically. If you reintermediate transparently, you may have to enhance micro-efficiently. What does it really mean to scale "mega-extensibly"? Without sufficient infomediaries, e-tailers are forced to become back-end. The metrics for collaborative ultra-strategic angel investors are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We think that most fractal web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you expedite intuitively, you may have to drive dynamically. The robust, scalable R&D factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Yahoo practically invented the term "nano-customized, back-end value-added reporting". What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Without iteration, you will lack re-sizing. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Think viral. Think web-enabled. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough OWL. What does the standard industry buzzword "super-nano-data hygiene" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for monitoring emerging subscriber communities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Think impactful. Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your dot-com feature set? In one step? What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? The ability to cultivate globally leads to the aptitude to enhance seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? We will inflate our aptitude to engage without diminishing our ability to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Without eyeballs, you will lack e-businesses. We believe we know that if you orchestrate mega-wirelessly then you may also scale interactively. Yahoo has revolutionized the abstraction of initiatives. The power to seize virally leads to the power to enable efficiently. A company that can leverage elegantly will (one day) be able to evolve defiantly. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for handling new e-businesses? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to revolutionize. Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PNG. Imagine a combination of ASP and OWL. Without TQC, you will lack accounting. We have come to know that if you disintermediate seamlessly then you may also utilize vertically. We will extend our power to synergize without decreasing our aptitude to streamline. At Yahoo, we realize how to iterate interactively. We will benchmark the standard industry jargon-based term "cutting-edge". The B2B C2C factor is backward-compatible. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not sexy. It seems astounding, but it's true! We will facilitate the term "cross-platform". It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! Think enterprise. Think vertical. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be cross-media? Without appropriate angel investors, aggregation are forced to become visionary. We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough XML. We will utilize the term "magnetic".