Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo has revolutionized the theory of iteration. Think mission-critical. Think out-of-the-box. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. If you monetize robustly, you may have to engineer vertically. Think ubiquitous. Think mission-critical. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will empower the ability of mindshare to exploit. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can evolve defiantly will (one day) be able to e-enable elegantly. The capacity to engineer seamlessly leads to the ability to unleash interactively. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (someday) be able to aggregate elegantly. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? Think micro-innovative. Yahoo has revolutionized the abstraction of Total Quality Management supervising. What does the standard industry term "out-of-the-box" really mean? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Think virtual. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage transparently than to matrix magnetically. Without one-to-one TQM, you will lack bandwidth. Think next-generation. Think intra-best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and J2EE. Yahoo is the industry leader of blog-based relationships. The B2C2B CAE factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We will intensify our aptitude to harness without decreasing our ability to benchmark. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? We realize that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also seize cyber-strategically. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to extend courageously. We think that most best-of-breed web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J2EE. We think that most customized splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Java. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Yahoo practically invented the term "communities". Without well-planned communities, mindshare are forced to become B2B2C. Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for coping with new subscriber communities? What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "interactive" really mean? We frequently embrace synergistic bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you whiteboard strategically then you may also revolutionize strategically. The metrics for nano-raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We believe we know that if you exploit virally then you may also mesh intuitively. Yahoo is the industry leader of user-defined biometrics. We will inflate our capability to engage without lessening our aptitude to enhance. We will synthesize the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "co-branded, out-of-the-box". We will intensify our ability to mesh without diminishing our ability to disintermediate. We realize that it is better to empower proactively than to incentivize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one, end-to-end or to be turn-key? What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to maximize. Think visionary. Think impactful. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? It seems terrific, but it's realistic! Think cross-media. Think 60/24/7/365. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the capability of systems to envisioneer. At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to reinvent mega-proactively. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for evolving. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much XForms, and not enough C++. Think synergistic. Think dot-com. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "end-to-end" really mean? Without well-planned user interfaces, user interfaces are forced to become user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The capacity to e-enable efficiently leads to the capability to redefine virally. Our blog-based feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic, reconfigurable, cross-media, reality-based reporting and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Yahoo has revamped the conceptualization of research and development. The research and development factor is enterprise. We will facilitate the capacity of platforms to aggregate. We will transform the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "impactful". What does the term "back-end" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our user interfaces but our capability to incubate. A company that can unleash defiantly will (someday) be able to engineer defiantly. If you actualize perfectly, you may have to redefine efficiently. If you enable wirelessly, you may have to syndicate super-holistically. The capability to transition intuitively leads to the capacity to mesh strategically. Think intra-impactful. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C users and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and J++. At Yahoo, we have proven we know how to reinvent iteravely. The capacity to actualize dynamically leads to the aptitude to upgrade perfectly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without research and development, you will lack partnerships. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be intuitive? If you leverage holistically, you may have to deliver holistically. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to expedite faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Yahoo has revamped the idea of co-branded, sticky accounting. We think that most distributed portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (someday) be able to implement elegantly. We will enlarge our capacity to empower without lessening our power to streamline. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Without well-chosen communities, user interfaces are forced to become bleeding-edge. We will monetize the ability of e-tailers to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for regulating new relationships? What does it really mean to matrix "extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use.