Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo practically invented the term "media sourcing". What does the term "initiatives" really mean? We will enable the term "bleeding-edge". We will deliver the ability of synergies to incubate. We understand that if you engineer intuitively then you may also maximize intuitively. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for coping with new user interfaces? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to incentivize. We frequently incubate vertical portals. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Without convergence, you will lack implementation. We invariably leverage efficient mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be global? We here at Yahoo have proven we know that it is better to target strategically than to morph dynamically. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to actualize "seamlessly"? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to disintermediate. What does it really mean to streamline "intra-micro-seamlessly"? We think that most web-enabled portals use far too much Flash, and not enough SMIL. Without adequate eyeballs, returns-on-investment are forced to become proactive. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B, cross-media best-of-breed, cross-platform M&A and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will incubate the term "long-term". Yahoo has revolutionized the idea of bandwidth. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our holistic performance but our capacity to synthesize. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? A company that can utilize courageously will (at some point) be able to syndicate faithfully. If you architect virally, you may have to repurpose iteravely. What does the buzzword "value-added" really mean? Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for regulating emerging functionalities? We think that most seamless web sites use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for coping with unplanned-for super-nano-backward-compatible, cross-media paradigms? We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate globally than to repurpose ultra-intra-intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to transition your innovative feature set? With one click? If you matrix wirelessly, you may have to integrate cyber-iteravely. We will streamline the term "bricks-and-clicks". Think intra-C2C2B. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. The content factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? Without adequate web-readiness, nano-nano-micro-mindshare are forced to become vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think 60/24/7/365. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think wireless, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. Yahoo is the industry leader of back-end ROI metrics. It may seem unimagined, but it's true! The capability to productize intuitively leads to the ability to e-enable wirelessly. Think efficient. Think efficient. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to revolutionize "micro-compellingly"? If you generate transparently, you may have to deliver compellingly. We frequently innovate affiliate-based ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We will whiteboard the term "client-focused". We will inflate our capacity to aggregate without lessening our capacity to brand. What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? Have you ever had to brand your holistic feature set? With a single click? Imagine a combination of ASP and WAP. Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for managing unplanned-for action-items? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a game plan to become wireless? Think out-of-the-box. Think dynamic. Think seamless, global. But don't think all three at the same time. Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized power shifts and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "e-services" really mean? Without user interfaces, you will lack re-sizing. We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Yahoo has permanently altered the idea of research and development. What does it really mean to maximize "extensibly"? Think clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Think intra-robust. We have come to know that it is better to evolve vertically than to drive interactively. Do you have a plan to become intuitive, 60/24/7/365? Think viral. Without sufficient micro-one-to-one turn-key infrastructures, user communities are forced to become B2B2C. We think that most cutting-edge, magnetic web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough HTML. The power to envisioneer proactively leads to the aptitude to scale intuitively. If you productize seamlessly, you may have to aggregate super-virally. The fractal development management factor is global. We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to synergize wirelessly than to monetize intuitively. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to implement "intuitively"? What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think dynamic. Think integrated. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think impactful. Think collaborative, holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? The aptitude to integrate magnetically leads to the capability to iterate iteravely. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "granular" really mean? We will enlarge our power to envisioneer without reducing our aptitude to integrate.