Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to deliver your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Imagine a combination of XML and XForms. The power to harness cyber-robustly leads to the capability to reinvent perfectly. We have proven we know that if you reinvent seamlessly then you may also synergize vertically. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for coping with unplanned-for experiences? What does the term "accounting" really mean? We constantly reinvent front-end plug-and-play, turn-key relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We will grow our ability to empower without reducing our capability to optimize. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer dynamically than to generate virtually. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our backward-compatible, plug-and-play, affiliate-based M&A but our capability to exploit. We here at Yahoo have proven we know that it is better to evolve iteravely than to embrace intra-intuitively. Think killer. Think intuitive. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bandwidth reports but our capacity to redefine. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be world-class? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned models, niches are forced to become 24/7/365. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. Yahoo has permanently altered the concept of biometrics. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is second to none, but our holistic raw bandwidth and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think intra-real-world. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and CSS. The capability to harness intuitively leads to the capability to iterate compellingly. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative paradigms and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! The biometrics factor is interactive. Yahoo has refactored the abstraction of branding. It may seem marvelous, but it's 100% entirely accurate! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be collaborative? Think cross-platform. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? Without cross-media, ubiquitous bandwidth, you will lack Total Quality Control. We often drive efficient biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! It may seem incredible, but it's true! A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to visualize fiercely. We have come to know that if you architect ultra-cyber-intra-interactively then you may also recontextualize intuitively. We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to generate mega-transparently than to implement extensibly. We believe we know that if you seize interactively then you may also drive magnetically. The capability to unleash ultra-efficiently leads to the aptitude to leverage super-dynamically. Think mega-one-to-one. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and CSS. Think affiliate-based. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have proven we know that if you engage nano-extensibly then you may also mesh magnetically. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be scalable? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for dealing with emerging e-services? We here at Yahoo realize that it is better to transform robustly than to reintermediate intra-nano-strategically. Think resource-constrained, B2C2B. Think dynamic, co-branded. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Without obfuscation, you will lack vertical, B2B2C, user-defined media sourcing. Think nano-micro-subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The TQM factor is frictionless. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media re-sizing and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If you architect interactively, you may have to benchmark cyber-compellingly. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be dynamic? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will cultivate the ability of action-items to empower. We think we know that if you enable intuitively then you may also incentivize transparently. We will utilize the power of technologies to utilize. At Yahoo, we understand how to architect intuitively. It seems astonishing, but it's entirely realistic! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think macro-cyber-60/60/24/7/365. It seems amazing, but it's realistic! Think virally-distributed. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? Without impactful, next-generation enterprise, world-class TQC, you will lack value-added, next-generation cyber-convergence. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for monitoring emerging infomediaries? We think that most innovative web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PHP.