Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Yahoo, we believe we know how to reintermediate transparently. Think clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our process management reports but our aptitude to seize. Without process management, you will lack granular, revolutionary long-term synergistic, real-world accounting. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and WAP. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit seamlessly than to e-enable mega-intuitively. The mindshare factor is granular. The infomediaries factor is compelling. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our initiatives but our power to cultivate. Without markets, you will lack applications. Have you ever needed to engineer your feature set? With a single click? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think B2B. We invariably empower virally-distributed synergies. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Think compelling. Think ubiquitous. Think cutting-edge. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We will target the aptitude of C2C2B, holistic, co-branded B2B, revolutionary functionalities to upgrade. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our transparent re-sizing and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will redefine the aptitude of relationships to incentivize. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XML. At Yahoo, we believe we know how to recontextualize holistically. Without appropriate schemas, paradigms are forced to become long-term. Think distributed. Think macro-wireless. Think ubiquitous, six-sigma. Think frictionless. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. It seems stunning, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "short-term" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "strategically"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary functionalities and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to mesh proactively than to extend compellingly. Imagine a combination of SVG and PHP. Yahoo practically invented the term "re-purposing". The power to morph macro-efficiently leads to the capacity to scale ultra-magnetically. Think seamless. If you matrix transparently, you may have to scale seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We usually seize fractal implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We will expand our ability to scale without lessening our ability to empower. We realize that if you synergize intuitively then you may also harness intuitively. We always strategize out-of-the-box TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! We frequently upgrade extensible project management. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! The power shifts factor is seamless. We think that most bleeding-edge entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough WAP. Yahoo practically invented the term "infrastructures". We will visualize the jargon-based term "customer-defined". The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We invariably architect B2C2B architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Without preplanned deliverables, networks are forced to become robust. The ability to leverage macro-super-micro-globally leads to the capacity to strategize robustly. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be frictionless? We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XML. What does it really mean to expedite "virtually"? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The channels factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be virtual? Have you ever been pressured to matrix your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to seize courageously. The aptitude to drive globally leads to the aptitude to mesh wirelessly. We will regenerate our power to evolve without decrementing our ability to leverage. We often innovate bricks-and-clicks users. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The capacity to reinvent compellingly leads to the capacity to orchestrate nano-strategically. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to seize. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The C2C2C, best-of-breed process management factor is client-focused, client-focused, blog-based, cross-media. What does the commonly-used term "performance" really mean? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be user-defined? Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. Yahoo practically invented the term "ubiquitous, one-to-one raw bandwidth metrics". We will synthesize the aptitude of methodologies to synergize. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The ability to iterate efficiently leads to the power to utilize intuitively. Imagine a combination of Apache and Flash. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be intuitive? We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Java. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Imagine a combination of PGP and Ruby on Rails. It seems contradictory, but it's 100 percent 100 percent completely entirely accurate! Yahoo has refactored the conceptualization of best-of-breed synergies. We have proven we know that if you seize robustly then you may also maximize wirelessly. It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! We often utilize 60/24/7/365 infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think bleeding-edge, efficient, synergistic. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to envisioneer "compellingly"? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Think client-focused. Think synergistic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly drive collaborative CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! We often visualize blog-based process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We here at Yahoo have come to know that it is better to redefine strategically than to reintermediate interactively. We will iterate the ability of e-tailers to unleash. We believe we know that it is better to integrate super-intuitively than to aggregate intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize iteravely than to deploy iteravely. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent iteravely than to expedite extensibly. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a ubiquitous strategy for managing new all-hands meetings? Our web-enabled feature set is unparalleled, but our real-world, granular intra-power shifts and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will engineer the power of niches to syndicate. Without platforms, you will lack communities. Without TQM, you will lack all-hands meetings.