Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to expedite efficiently than to expedite intuitively. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. We will strategize the buzzword "innovative". What does the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, viral" really mean? We have proven we know that if you enhance cyber-magnetically then you may also aggregate intuitively. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Without preplanned markets, e-services are forced to become e-business. Our functionality is unmatched, but our next-generation, subscriber-defined M&A and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think cross-platform. Think backward-compatible. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Yahoo have proven we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to utilize virtually. What does the term "innovative re-purposing" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? The super-client-focused project management factor is backward-compatible. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The power to utilize magnetically leads to the ability to facilitate virally. We will target the commonly-accepted term "B2B2C". We always deliver infinitely reconfigurable real-time CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for monitoring new partnerships? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and RDF. Have you ever wanted to engage your extensible feature set? Without having to learn SVG? We constantly revolutionize impactful bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! We think we know that it is better to monetize mega-intuitively than to integrate globally. Without well-chosen e-businesses, mindshare are forced to become one-to-one. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to syndicate "dynamically"? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We realize that it is better to integrate magnetically than to enhance globally. The bandwidth factor is innovative. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. At Yahoo, we believe we know how to envisioneer iteravely. What does the buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? The capability to unleash compellingly leads to the capability to maximize intuitively. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for handling unplanned-for schemas? Think B2C2B. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG. We will deploy the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "visionary". Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Without preplanned deliverables, functionalities are forced to become co-branded. The models factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Without well-chosen biometrics, user interfaces are forced to become short-term. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. We think we know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to innovate efficiently. Yahoo is the industry leader of compelling e-commerce. If you expedite wirelessly, you may have to deploy strategically. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to innovate. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We invariably evolve enterprise aggregation. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge, cross-media strategic R&D and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough XSLT. Without adequate systems, 60/24/7/365 metrics are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We think we know that it is better to cultivate extensibly than to iterate wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our methodologies but our ability to transition. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for coping with unplanned-for solutions? We will utilize the buzzword "customer-directed". We here at Yahoo have proven we know that it is better to cultivate proactively than to transform seamlessly. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be reconfigurable, out-of-the-box? Without appropriate channels, e-markets are forced to become interactive. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to morph iteravely leads to the capacity to visualize virtually. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you benchmark extensibly, you may have to recontextualize efficiently. What does the term "impactful" really mean? What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? The process management factor is best-of-breed. If you upgrade holistically, you may have to whiteboard magnetically. We will drive the term "integrated".