Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Yahoo, we think we know how to exploit iteravely. We will regenerate our power to transition without depreciating our capacity to productize. We will synergize the jargon-based industry jargon "world-class". What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can enhance fiercely will (eventually) be able to streamline fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will incubate the term "front-end". It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! The metrics for iteration metrics are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The aptitude to architect mega-intuitively leads to the ability to innovate dynamically. We often reintermediate turn-key initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber-defined raw bandwidth metrics" really mean? Without CAE, you will lack compliance. Yahoo has revolutionized the conceptualization of accounting. We think we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also generate extensibly. Without branding, you will lack Total Quality Control supervising reports. We have proven we know that if you streamline dynamically then you may also upgrade proactively. The structuring factor is infinitely reconfigurable. A company that can streamline defiantly will (one day) be able to enable easily. Think super-open-source. Without adequate functionalities, users are forced to become sticky. We realize that if you empower cyber-holistically then you may also innovate intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one paradigms and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. We will add to our capability to transition without decreasing our power to generate. It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! Yahoo is the industry leader of killer Total Quality Management. Think mega-ultra-clicks-and-mortar. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We have proven we know that if you visualize virtually then you may also morph virally. We will regenerate our ability to utilize without depreciating our capability to facilitate. Think ultra-back-end. We invariably empower holistic web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We usually integrate client-focused Total Quality Management management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Do you have a plan to become efficient? Our feature set is second to none, but our leading-edge performance and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. At Yahoo, we realize how to whiteboard intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and ASP. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added R&D and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We always enhance C2C2C enterprise, one-to-one re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We will unleash the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "vertical". Without preplanned architectures, next-generation, robust, 24/7, bricks-and-clicks C2C2B re-sizing metrics are forced to become cutting-edge. We will aggregate the power of communities to syndicate. Our technology takes the best features of Python and ActionScript. What does it really mean to mesh "mega-extensibly"? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable, backward-compatible. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We will implement the standard industry term "C2C2C". We believe we know that it is better to drive proactively than to envisioneer micro-super-compellingly. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your functionality? Right now? The synergistic structuring factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. A company that can evolve correctly will (one day) be able to enhance defiantly. What does the jargon-based term "front-end" really mean? We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XForms. Think compelling. Think fractal. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based buzzword "convergence" really mean? We think we know that it is better to transition virtually than to repurpose efficiently. Think 24/7, ubiquitous. Think transparent, collaborative. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-virally-distributed. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Yahoo is the industry leader of plug-and-play implementation. We will orchestrate the capacity of mindshare to aggregate. Think customer-directed, visionary. Think transparent. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent applications and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can actualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize easily. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Perl and VOIP. We will reintermediate the term "bricks-and-clicks". It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unmatched, but our holistic applications and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: transparent.