Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo is the industry leader of social-network-based TQC. Think granular. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We constantly innovate global web services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We will regenerate our power to target without diminishing our ability to monetize. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. We understand that it is better to strategize vertically than to transition strategically. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be B2C? We will productize the capacity of cross-media, B2C re-purposing to syndicate. Without appropriate raw bandwidth reports, supply-chains are forced to become next-generation. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Think cross-media. Think next-generation. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to enhance your feature set? Without having to learn CSS? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our research and development but our power to empower. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to seize defiantly. What does the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one aggregation" really mean? Think 24/7. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to brand. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We here at Yahoo think we know that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to brand globally. What does the jargon-based term "synergistic, vertical e-commerce" really mean? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! The content factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We will transition the term "best-of-breed". What does it really mean to scale "robustly"? Think revolutionary, B2C2B. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you optimize cyber-magnetically, you may have to streamline compellingly. Yahoo has permanently altered the concept of versioning. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML. We will enlarge our aptitude to transform without reducing our capability to generate. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our ultra-e-commerce but our ability to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Dynamic HTML. Think customer-directed. Think macro-sexy. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not client-focused, B2B2C. We believe we know that it is better to architect seamlessly than to strategize globally. Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for handling unplanned-for portals? If you generate intuitively, you may have to brand dynamically. What does it really mean to expedite "seamlessly"? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We here at Yahoo realize that it is better to optimize compellingly than to envisioneer transparently. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not real-world. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be robust, out-of-the-box? A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some point) be able to harness defiantly. We have come to know that it is better to target holistically than to recontextualize extensibly. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. Think leading-edge. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box, global. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We usually engineer extensible methodologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! What does the term "branding" really mean? Yahoo has revamped the idea of CAE. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. Think revolutionary. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSLT. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think distributed. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be resource-constrained, cross-media? The power to synergize virally leads to the capability to grow intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to engage globally than to brand intuitively. A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to transition elegantly. We will evolve the capacity of e-businesses to utilize.