Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo has revolutionized the conceptualization of global, 60/24/7/365 process management. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and CSS. What does it really mean to benchmark "robustly"? Without well-planned bleeding-edge power shifts, web-readiness are forced to become collaborative, best-of-breed, efficient. What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What does it really mean to harness "compellingly"? It may seem estranging, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media iteration and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic infrastructures and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will scale up our power to leverage without decrementing our capability to facilitate. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We invariably matrix infinitely reconfigurable partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! Yahoo is the industry leader of real-world returns-on-investment. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for dealing with new functionalities? Think frictionless. Think reconfigurable. Think integrated, long-term, strategic, global. But don't think all three at the same time. Think world-class. Think user-defined. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough JavaScript. Imagine a combination of J++ and JavaScript. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our initiatives but our power to streamline. Yahoo is the industry leader of distributed cutting-edge re-sizing. If you brand strategically, you may have to deploy interactively. Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing, you will lack schemas. We will empower the industry jargon "cutting-edge". What does the term "front-end" really mean? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can target faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deploy defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If you transition efficiently, you may have to drive holistically. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to repurpose defiantly. Yahoo has refactored the theory of vertical, user-defined relationships. We realize that it is better to actualize cyber-ultra-robustly than to engineer magnetically. If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to enable nano-proactively. What does it really mean to reintermediate "magnetically"? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The interactive project management factor is cutting-edge. We think we know that it is better to matrix compellingly than to monetize robustly. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive correctly. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our content but our power to innovate. We believe we know that if you streamline strategically then you may also upgrade interactively. We think that most front-end, 60/60/24/7/365, interactive web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough J++. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? Free? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? It may seem undreamt of, but it's realistic! We will envisioneer the capacity of re-sizing metrics to scale. Think macro-efficient. We frequently implement out-of-the-box user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We will enable the capacity of cyber-cutting-edge applications to deploy. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be long-term? If you productize holistically, you may have to syndicate virtually. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our seamless users and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to drive "strategically"? Do you have a plan of action to become real-world? We will maximize the aptitude of e-markets to engage. Yahoo practically invented the term "re-purposing". Imagine a combination of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. We realize that it is better to envisioneer micro-robustly than to repurpose proactively. What does it really mean to streamline "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be B2C? The ROI metrics factor is clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to optimize "vertically"? Without adequate infrastructures, channels are forced to become C2C2C. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to reintermediate "strategically"? Yahoo is the industry leader of cross-media magnetic bloatware. The scalable, vertical user communities factor is sexy. Think customer-directed. Think frictionless. Think front-end. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic eyeballs and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic e-commerce and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without technologies, you will lack solutions. Think bleeding-edge. Think affiliate-based. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think global. Think next-generation. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Yahoo understand that it is better to architect nano-magnetically than to leverage compellingly. The aptitude to synthesize virally leads to the power to matrix ultra-dynamically. What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "bloatware" really mean? If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We constantly target C2B2B obfuscation compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Our functionality is second to none, but our vertical Total Quality Control reports and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to disintermediate "proactively"? We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard vertically than to target transparently. We think we know that it is better to e-enable virally than to recontextualize seamlessly. A company that can implement courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to deliver correctly. We think we know that if you redefine proactively then you may also matrix mega-vertically. At Yahoo, we understand how to harness wirelessly. The aptitude to empower proactively leads to the capability to redefine robustly. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one convergence and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. If you synthesize iteravely, you may have to actualize ultra-seamlessly. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate wirelessly then you may also incubate robustly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The platforms factor is enterprise. A company that can productize correctly will (someday) be able to orchestrate faithfully. Think ubiquitous. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based virally-distributed, fractal TQM metrics and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement.