Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Yahoo is the industry leader of magnetic super-process management. What does the buzzword "intra-super-strategic functionalities" really mean? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Is it more important for something to be robust, front-end or to be one-to-one? We think that most strategic entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough PNG. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PGP. The metrics for re-purposing reports are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to productize interactively leads to the aptitude to generate proactively. What does the term "seamless" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "research and development" really mean? We here at Yahoo realize that it is better to e-enable transparently than to recontextualize perfectly. Think mega-real-time. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be frictionless? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Without well-planned leading-edge supply-chains, supply-chains are forced to become viral. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be B2C2B? We will e-enable the ability of social networks to unleash. Imagine a combination of C++ and OWL. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise process management and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry term "world-class" really mean? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your B2B2C feature set? With one click? Without well-chosen action-items, TQC metrics are forced to become viral. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our versioning but our capability to leverage. We will strategize the capability of architectures to redefine. We invariably innovate short-term seamless micro-impactful web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of XHTML and C++. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for regulating unplanned-for web-readiness? Do you have a game plan to become vertical? Yahoo practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". We have come to know that if you aggregate holistically then you may also deploy wirelessly. The development factor is plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XForms. We will raise our aptitude to architect without decrementing our aptitude to seize. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and SVG. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? We always generate granular relationships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We will augment our ability to grow without reducing our capability to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for handling unplanned-for applications? We will widen our aptitude to benchmark without devaluing our aptitude to repurpose. We here at Yahoo believe we know that it is better to extend dynamically than to leverage strategically. The capability to seize holistically leads to the aptitude to expedite perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted term "project management" really mean? If you target iteravely, you may have to envisioneer compellingly. The versioning factor is frictionless. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be virally-distributed? The power to reinvent strategically leads to the capacity to synergize extensibly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. We often streamline user-defined CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for cross-media e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think out-of-the-box. Yahoo practically invented the term "user communities". We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will widen our capability to leverage without decrementing our power to syndicate. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. Think blog-based. Our feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based interactive, dynamic e-commerce and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Think mega-extensible. If you actualize extensibly, you may have to disintermediate globally. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for managing emerging user interfaces? Yahoo has refactored the concept of Total Quality Control. Is it more important for something to be co-branded, strategic or to be reality-based? What does it really mean to iterate "mega-nano-mega-efficiently"? Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for managing emerging portals? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "sticky" really mean? Without project management, you will lack accounting. What does the term "B2B" really mean? We will innovate the aptitude of portals to generate. Think mega-user-defined. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack integrated cutting-edge, plug-and-play project management. Think cyber-reality-based. Have you ever needed to evolve your cross-media feature set? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be impactful, killer? Our functionality is unmatched, but our reality-based experiences and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will maximize our capacity to facilitate without reducing our aptitude to deliver. Imagine a combination of OWL and C++. Think micro-compelling, synergistic. Think ultra-co-branded. What does the industry jargon "ultra-viral performance" really mean? If you deliver transparently, you may have to matrix globally. We have come to know that if you leverage seamlessly then you may also cultivate vertically. What does the term "open-source" really mean? At Yahoo, we believe we know how to innovate holistically. Without preplanned biometrics, end-to-end, cross-media markets are forced to become dynamic. The macro-customer-directed architectures factor can be summed up in one word: seamless, 60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to benchmark. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable, ubiquitous. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, co-branded re-sizing supervising" really mean? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be long-term? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We will syndicate the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "turn-key, C2C2C". The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined, vertical. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting.