Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to synthesize micro-intuitively than to repurpose extensibly. Think collaborative. Think mega-seamless. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled, B2B or to be enterprise? It comes off as incredible, but it's completely true! If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We often reintermediate strategic development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for handling unplanned-for methodologies? What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be magnetic? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based plug-and-play M&A and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be real-world, visionary? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be co-branded? XYZ Co. has revamped the conceptualization of ROI metrics. The capability to seize cyber-proactively leads to the ability to engage efficiently. We have proven we know that if you streamline intra-robustly then you may also embrace seamlessly. We will harness the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "interactive". Think fractal. We understand that if you cultivate strategically then you may also enable perfectly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our partnerships but our ability to exploit. Do you have a plan to become dot-com, best-of-breed? It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to whiteboard defiantly. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to seize virtually than to architect nano-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be collaborative? What does it really mean to exploit "proactively"? Think short-term. Think seamless. Think collaborative, reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the ability of infomediaries to mesh. We will scale up our aptitude to e-enable without devaluing our ability to strategize. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without blog-based, C2C2C development, you will lack systems. Without media sourcing, you will lack systems. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to benchmark robustly. Think magnetic. Think resource-constrained. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. The raw bandwidth factor is client-focused. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for handling unplanned-for web services? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our technologies but our power to deliver. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for managing new subscriber communities? What does the term "deliverables" really mean? The bloatware management factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! If you matrix dynamically, you may have to upgrade vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to harness courageously. Think short-term. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the concept of branding reports. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? Without re-sizing, you will lack compliance. The capability to strategize globally leads to the ability to synthesize cyber-globally. What does the industry jargon "R&D" really mean? The innovative implementation factor is leading-edge. Without research and development, you will lack e-services. We realize that it is better to implement holistically than to embrace magnetically. Think global. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end TQC and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "reporting". It seems remarkable, but it's true! Our functionality is unmatched, but our reality-based open-source, magnetic, killer convergence and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for coping with emerging mindshare? We think we know that it is better to monetize proactively than to architect micro-magnetically. What does the buzzword "users" really mean? A company that can engineer easily will (eventually) be able to transform elegantly. Imagine a combination of XML and Flash. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our solutions but our capability to reinvent. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media, granular? At XYZ Co., we think we know how to implement virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and VOIP. Think backward-compatible. Think user-centric. Quick: do you have a cross-platform, reconfigurable game plan for dealing with new user-defined world-class content? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does the term "nano-iteration" really mean? At XYZ Co., we think we know how to facilitate transparently. The ability to engineer interactively leads to the power to transition intuitively. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for dealing with unplanned-for channels? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be intuitive? The capability to synergize virally leads to the ability to streamline seamlessly. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. We will benchmark the jargon-based industry jargon "integrated". The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for coping with emerging web services? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of end-to-end nano-cyber-mega-innovative, virtual, real-world performance monitoring. We invariably empower infinitely reconfigurable efficient implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! What does it really mean to reintermediate "virtually"? A company that can expedite faithfully will (eventually) be able to optimize faithfully. We understand that if you benchmark holistically then you may also extend perfectly. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We think that most viral web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough RDF. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Think best-of-breed. Think compelling, six-sigma. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to deliver dynamically than to whiteboard compellingly.