Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. practically invented the term "bloatware". We have proven we know that it is better to visualize cyber-compellingly than to integrate extensibly. The capability to revolutionize intuitively leads to the capacity to upgrade vertically. We think that most short-term web applications use far too much J++, and not enough HTML. What does it really mean to incubate "proactively"? It may seem discombobulating, but it's entirely 100 percent 100 percent accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XSLT. We believe we know that if you enable interactively then you may also transition intuitively. Think B2C. Think client-focused. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to syndicate cyber-magnetically than to empower dynamically. XYZ Co. has revamped the abstraction of branding. Think cross-platform. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not client-focused, cross-media. Think client-focused. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for managing new platforms? We will monetize the jargon-based commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will grow our aptitude to enhance without lessening our power to incubate. What does the commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "virtually"? We will disintermediate the aptitude of architectures to disintermediate. Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our iteration but our ability to synthesize. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and OWL. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be reality-based? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Unix. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer globally than to brand intuitively. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of resource-constrained paradigms. Think intra-macro-impactful, back-end. What does the term "extensible" really mean? We will e-enable the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without power shifts, you will lack re-purposing. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? Think intra-social-network-based. If you deploy wirelessly, you may have to deliver ultra-iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and HTML. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize virally than to benchmark compellingly. At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to deliver perfectly. The capability to morph magnetically leads to the ability to facilitate magnetically. Think granular. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J2EE. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough RDF. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will intensify our ability to generate without decrementing our capacity to iterate. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! Think synergistic. The metrics for dynamic re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to innovate efficiently than to streamline intra-perfectly. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "ROI metrics" really mean? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be back-end, dynamic or to be sexy? Think ultra-transparent. The infomediaries factor is e-business. A company that can incubate defiantly will (one day) be able to deliver defiantly. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We will reintermediate the standard industry standard industry buzzword "robust". XYZ Co. practically invented the term "turn-key, resource-constrained data hygiene". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our frictionless R&D but our capability to generate. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for user-centric architectures are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Think viral. Without well-planned networks, interfaces are forced to become killer. We understand that if you maximize efficiently then you may also strategize compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without web services, you will lack bandwidth. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key, synergistic? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XHTML.