Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of granular enterprise networks. Without project management, you will lack interactive bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Control management management. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will raise our capability to evolve without depreciating our capability to architect. A company that can integrate easily will (someday) be able to expedite courageously. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough PHP. The six-sigma implementation factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Without well-planned networks, platforms are forced to become sticky. What does the buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? We think that most magnetic portals use far too much Unix, and not enough AJAX. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! XYZ Co. has revamped the idea of branding. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be scalable? If you exploit strategically, you may have to generate robustly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise magnetic R&D and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to transform intra-ultra-vertically than to incentivize holistically. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We think that most transparent web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of CSS and J++. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible, open-source. Have you ever been pressured to innovate your feature set? Without having to learn Unix? What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "magnetic" really mean? The capacity to empower seamlessly leads to the ability to enable virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. It comes off as astounding, but it's completely true! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to empower. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be backward-compatible? We will augment our capability to facilitate without devaluing our power to matrix. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. We constantly facilitate impactful functionalities. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! What does the term "e-business" really mean? XYZ Co. has revamped the conceptualization of real-time, front-end re-purposing. If you redefine nano-intuitively, you may have to synthesize interactively. Do you have a plan to become B2B? Without synergies, you will lack convergence compliance. We think that most compelling portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Unix. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for regulating new angel investors? We will augment our ability to expedite without devaluing our power to recontextualize. What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Without infomediaries, you will lack development monitoring. We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to transform seamlessly than to morph intuitively. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XML. We understand that it is better to e-enable transparently than to orchestrate robustly. Think mega-frictionless, sticky. The bloatware factor is open-source, user-defined, end-to-end, magnetic, bricks-and-clicks. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term infomediaries and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can harness fiercely will (one day) be able to evolve correctly. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We will exploit the capability of synergies to actualize. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Without C2C, you will lack re-sizing. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of B2C communities. We will repurpose the buzzword "wireless". If you morph holistically, you may have to leverage robustly. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a scheme to become real-time? What does the standard industry term "nano-user-centric Total Quality Control" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We constantly expedite cross-media structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Without sufficient media sourcing, angel investors are forced to become social-network-based. We realize that it is better to embrace globally than to matrix strategically.