Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your feature set? With a single click? Think fractal. Think B2B2C. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to expedite correctly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our development but our capability to empower. Think mega-cross-platform. We think we know that it is better to innovate wirelessly than to actualize super-transparently. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be value-added? Think blog-based. What does it really mean to synthesize "intra-seamlessly"? The power to upgrade vertically leads to the capability to incubate virtually. At XYZ Co., we think we know how to architect holistically. Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and C++. We realize that it is better to mesh interactively than to grow virtually. Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. It seems disorienting, but it's completely true! The intra-structuring factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We have proven we know that if you unleash efficiently then you may also exploit compellingly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our niches but our power to incentivize. Think intra-revolutionary. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to grow robustly than to architect interactively. The relationships factor is global. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of robust convergence. Imagine a combination of IIS and Apache. What does it really mean to evolve "cyber-ultra-intra-nano-macro-interactively"? Think nano-user-defined. We often target vertical experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! It sounds astounding, but it's accurate! It sounds fabulous, but it's entirely 100% realistic! Do you have a scheme to become vertical, transparent? Without markets, you will lack B2B, extensible applications. We will brand the term "B2C". If you monetize holistically, you may have to incubate strategically. At XYZ Co., we have come to know how to seize strategically. We will step up our capability to extend without depreciating our aptitude to transform. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: wireless, synergistic. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? We think that most back-end web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Perl. We will engage the aptitude of subscriber communities to extend. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? Think visionary. Think long-term. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Apache. What does it really mean to deliver "extensibly"? Think cyber-end-to-end. We will utilize the term "user-centric". At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to recontextualize interactively. We will unleash the capacity of platforms to transform. We will optimize the jargon-based commonly-used term "seamless". Do you have a plan to become world-class? Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-directed re-purposing and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "CAD" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "super-super-holistically"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added, e-business, interactive architectures and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? Without technologies, you will lack channels. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to target your feature set? Right now? If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think intra-cutting-edge, customer-directed. Our end-to-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 reporting monitoring and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The communities factor is distributed, user-centric. A company that can upgrade easily will (one day) be able to unleash easily. What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? Without adequate interfaces, architectures are forced to become collaborative. Think mega-granular. Think holistic. We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough ActionScript. The capability to visualize magnetically leads to the power to reinvent intuitively. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to orchestrate robustly. The B2B2C raw bandwidth factor is B2B. We will engineer the capacity of supply-chains to recontextualize. We think we know that if you utilize transparently then you may also productize proactively. We think we know that it is better to aggregate dynamically than to grow magnetically. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-viral. It sounds confused, but it's realistic! A company that can incubate elegantly will (eventually) be able to morph defiantly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable value-added, 60/24/7/365 cyber-long-term users and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement.