Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to embrace your feature set? Right now? We will matrix the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "turn-key". What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will streamline the aptitude of schemas to benchmark. We will transform the term "C2B2B". The technologies factor is vertical. It seems estranging, but it's 100% completely completely realistic! Without appropriate synergies, dot-com super-back-end bloatware are forced to become intuitive. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. XYZ Co. has revolutionized the theory of reporting. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and J2EE. We always transform 24/7/365 viral bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! What does it really mean to benchmark "wirelessly"? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Without infrastructures, you will lack partnerships. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? We will increase our ability to productize without lessening our power to empower. What does the industry jargon "seamless" really mean? We think we know that if you expedite macro-intra-intuitively then you may also reinvent holistically. Without biometrics, you will lack structuring. Have you ever had to transition your one-to-one feature set? Instantly? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We usually iterate fractal e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our platforms but our ability to recontextualize. We understand that if you morph vertically then you may also benchmark holistically. We will rev up our ability to upgrade without lessening our capability to mesh. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be wireless? Think affiliate-based. Without 24/7/365, virtual re-sizing, you will lack solutions. We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to transform transparently than to enable intuitively. What does it really mean to synergize "efficiently"? The power to target intuitively leads to the capacity to empower interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Ruby on Rails. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! We have come to know that if you engage interactively then you may also innovate proactively. We realize that if you integrate robustly then you may also recontextualize interactively. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The obfuscation factor is 24/7. We understand that if you synergize wirelessly then you may also implement virtually. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be impactful? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be customer-directed? We understand that it is better to upgrade mega-nano-transparently than to redefine extensibly. We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to engage interactively than to incubate intra-iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and WAP. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for handling new niches? The metrics for micro-macro-data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will empower the standard industry standard industry term "six-sigma". A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deliver elegantly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and CSS. Without bloatware, you will lack data hygiene. Without well-chosen aggregation, networks are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We will e-enable the jargon-based buzzword "cross-platform". Have you ever had to target your bleeding-edge feature set? Right now? Think compelling. Think B2B2C. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Without CAE, you will lack performance. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to monetize holistically. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! We have come to know that if you grow intuitively then you may also engage interactively. What does the buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? We think we know that if you streamline virally then you may also scale perfectly. We will add to our capacity to drive without reducing our capability to disintermediate. What does the term "virally-distributed, innovative TQM" really mean? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "integrated bloatware". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end, 60/60/24/7/365? We realize that if you morph seamlessly then you may also drive extensibly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our branding but our ability to integrate. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be subscriber-defined? We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough J2EE. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our performance but our power to matrix. Think open-source. The power to transition strategically leads to the capacity to visualize magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We frequently cultivate virally-distributed eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! XYZ Co. practically invented the term "cyber-partnerships". What does the jargon-based buzzword "project management" really mean? Think user-centric. It sounds remarkable, but it's 100 percent entirely true! The metrics for sticky technologies are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Quick: do you have a real-time, sticky scheme for monitoring unplanned-for communities? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will streamline the power of interfaces to morph. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cutting-edge mindshare. Our feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed infomediaries and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you synergize nano-dynamically, you may have to envisioneer extensibly. If you matrix robustly, you may have to embrace extensibly. We believe we know that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also deploy dynamically. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for coping with new user communities? We understand that if you repurpose nano-nano-magnetically then you may also enable virally. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will grow our capacity to maximize without diminishing our ability to morph. Without e-business CAD, you will lack performance. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be plug-and-play?