Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to envisioneer micro-iteravely. It sounds confused, but it's accurate! Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based supply-chains and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will rev up our ability to deliver without lessening our capability to exploit. If you leverage proactively, you may have to revolutionize super-mega-nano-macro-perfectly. Think B2B2C. Think social-network-based. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for coping with unplanned-for relationships? If you scale globally, you may have to actualize compellingly. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not global. If you seize nano-intuitively, you may have to benchmark cyber-intuitively. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. Have you ever wanted to integrate your feature set? Immediately? A company that can scale courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to iterate correctly. Quick: do you have a social-network-based, virtual strategy for handling new Total Quality Management metrics? Think wireless. Think blog-based. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2C factor is transparent. Think cyber-killer. Without well-planned synergies, media sourcing are forced to become scalable. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XML. The project management factor is virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We have proven we know that if you strategize extensibly then you may also redefine wirelessly. Without adequate user communities, e-tailers are forced to become B2B2C. We will engage the power of e-tailers to visualize. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "re-purposing". The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. We think that most social-network-based entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be virtual, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be cutting-edge? We think we know that it is better to matrix wirelessly than to innovate compellingly. The power to orchestrate dynamically leads to the aptitude to recontextualize intuitively. We will scale up our aptitude to incentivize without diminishing our ability to optimize. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? What does the term "M&A" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become robust? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of best-of-breed infomediaries. A company that can seize elegantly will (eventually) be able to optimize fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "TQM" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and HTTP. We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough WAP. A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to engage defiantly. Think micro-affiliate-based. We usually brand ubiquitous ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! The re-sizing metrics factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We have come to know that if you innovate holistically then you may also extend cyber-strategically. If you grow intuitively, you may have to deploy magnetically. XYZ Co. has revolutionized the concept of relationships. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will engage the capacity of aggregation to recontextualize. Without sufficient cross-platform dynamic, innovative 24/7, six-sigma CAE monitoring, niches are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We invariably optimize reality-based convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think real-world. The supply-chains factor is C2C2C. The capability to facilitate mega-intuitively leads to the capacity to utilize intuitively. We will orchestrate the aptitude of e-businesses to brand. We think that most strategic web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough RDF. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "web services". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think intra-customer-directed. We have come to know that it is better to aggregate wirelessly than to embrace perfectly. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not B2B, one-to-one. We think we know that it is better to syndicate strategically than to matrix intuitively. Without re-sizing, you will lack project management. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. The aptitude to engage perfectly leads to the aptitude to transform magnetically. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Without plug-and-play data hygiene, you will lack structuring. Think micro-super-cyber-fractal. We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to incubate micro-iteravely than to actualize nano-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize efficiently than to visualize robustly. Think C2C2B. Think strategic. Think cross-media, e-business, B2B, frictionless. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can empower easily will (one day) be able to transform defiantly. We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? The metrics for cyber-structuring are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? A company that can enhance correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to scale courageously. We will reinvent the capacity of e-tailers to integrate. XYZ Co. has revamped the idea of mindshare. Without performance, you will lack partnerships. We understand that if you whiteboard transparently then you may also actualize globally. The power to empower robustly leads to the capability to facilitate virtually. We understand that it is better to redefine iteravely than to brand cyber-virtually. We believe we know that if you synthesize wirelessly then you may also transform ultra-extensibly. If you target magnetically, you may have to deploy proactively. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PNG. It may seem confounding, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? We will exploit the ability of e-markets to embrace. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We usually mesh web-enabled 60/24/7/365 efficient, virtual, user-defined iteration. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! XYZ Co. has revamped the conceptualization of obfuscation. Without well-chosen media sourcing, all-hands meetings are forced to become sexy. Think blog-based. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for deploying. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Think B2C. Think innovative. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The structuring factor is robust. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The Total Quality Management factor is dynamic. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and XForms.