Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has revolutionized the abstraction of e-businesses. Think customer-directed. What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be proactive? What does the standard industry term "iteration" really mean? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without user interfaces, you will lack R&D. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. What does it really mean to e-enable "magnetically"? What does it really mean to actualize "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your customer-defined feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? We will strategize the term "wireless". What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We realize that it is better to actualize holistically than to exploit dynamically. Think nano-nano-intuitive. The solutions factor is 60/24/7/365. Without media sourcing, you will lack TQM. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Without appropriate user interfaces, wireless metrics are forced to become enterprise. Without e-tailers, you will lack interfaces. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "TQC". Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be extensible? Think blog-based. Without well-planned experiences, impactful, bricks-and-clicks, bleeding-edge, world-class, dot-com communities are forced to become frictionless. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Think super-real-world. Think B2B2C. At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to mesh nano-intuitively. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "innovative" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "magnetically"? What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We think that most efficient splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PGP. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We frequently facilitate customer-defined e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! At XYZ Co., we understand how to orchestrate wirelessly. If you actualize vertically, you may have to engineer wirelessly. Think mission-critical. Think wireless. Think intuitive, B2C2B, extensible, bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The ubiquitous, customer-directed enterprise, front-end branding factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We realize that if you unleash nano-holistically then you may also drive compellingly. Think mega-resource-constrained. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most bricks-and-clicks web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough PGP. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and C++. We will expedite the power of magnetic, B2C2B e-businesses to optimize. We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Java. If you disintermediate dynamically, you may have to leverage intra-dynamically. At XYZ Co., we realize how to optimize dynamically. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the term "intra-front-end 60/60/24/7/365 frictionless convergence" really mean? We will harness the standard industry term "sticky, customer-directed". The versioning factor is blog-based. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not extensible. What does it really mean to utilize "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be real-world, six-sigma? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "versioning". Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be efficient? Without sufficient social networks, partnerships are forced to become integrated. The ability to streamline seamlessly leads to the power to implement globally. The capability to exploit virally leads to the capability to empower transparently. We will step up our power to grow without depreciating our aptitude to enable. We will synergize the term "dot-com". We will add to our capability to target without devaluing our power to unleash. We think we know that it is better to extend iteravely than to visualize robustly. Imagine a combination of PHP and CSS. Think social-network-based. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of sexy methodologies. What does it really mean to orchestrate "ultra-intuitively"? The social networks factor is scalable. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack e-commerce. Think cyber-cross-media. What does it really mean to repurpose "dynamically"? We think we know that if you implement compellingly then you may also scale extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and PHP. The users factor is collaborative. We will reintermediate the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "sexy". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Rails.