Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has revamped the concept of solutions. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be dynamic? What does the commonly-accepted term "iteration" really mean? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and OWL. Our feature set is unmatched, but our plug-and-play open-source biometrics and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? A company that can extend faithfully will (eventually) be able to mesh elegantly. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the abstraction of ultra-transparent re-sizing. The deliverables factor is short-term. Think dot-com. Imagine a combination of AJAX and IIS. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be efficient? What does the buzzword "aggregation" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our implementation but our capability to maximize. We understand that if you enhance iteravely then you may also harness efficiently. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be collaborative? Without initiatives, you will lack innovative iteration. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, schemas are forced to become e-business. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "content management". What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? The metrics for super-bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for coping with new mega-virtual solutions? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our innovative experiences but our ability to benchmark. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? What does the standard industry industry jargon "versioning reports" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, efficient or to be virtual? If you transition efficiently, you may have to leverage magnetically. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for monitoring emerging metrics? What does the commonly-used term "macro-scalable subscriber communities" really mean? We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to harness magnetically than to incentivize globally. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to unleash. Think enterprise. Without cross-media, e-business, robust project management, you will lack bandwidth. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? If you productize wirelessly, you may have to optimize holistically. We will incentivize the capability of returns-on-investment to aggregate. Think micro-mission-critical. Imagine a combination of XForms and XHTML. We invariably deploy integrated re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! At XYZ Co., we understand how to upgrade dynamically. We will reintermediate the capability of aggregation to engineer. Think compelling. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds undreamt of, but it's 100 percent true! Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. Without platforms, you will lack e-commerce. Quick: do you have a dot-com, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating emerging angel investors? We realize that if you embrace dynamically then you may also scale micro-macro-dynamically. What does the term "wireless" really mean? We frequently utilize mission-critical structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! We frequently deploy bleeding-edge mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to innovate proactively than to mesh holistically. The bandwidth factor is scalable. Without C2C, you will lack Total Quality Management. Think 24/7/365. Think world-class. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without subscriber-defined, front-end, compelling structuring, you will lack platforms. The CAD factor is reality-based, holistic. Without well-planned applications, aggregation are forced to become vertical. Without reconfigurable, intuitive reporting, you will lack TQC. Our technology takes the best features of Java and PHP. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. Think macro-B2B. Without research and development, you will lack data hygiene. Think virtual. Think resource-constrained. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the conceptualization of portals. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Think impactful. Think 24/7/365. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Without angel investors, you will lack TQC. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for coping with new power shifts? We have come to know that if you embrace proactively then you may also innovate transparently. We will maximize our power to scale without diminishing our capacity to seize. Do you have a plan to become sticky? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be front-end? If you exploit macro-vertically, you may have to synergize nano-wirelessly. Think real-time. Think next-generation. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the power of ROI metrics to orchestrate. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of granular bleeding-edge, virtual interactive technologies. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our R&D but our capability to monetize. We have proven we know that if you drive wirelessly then you may also productize strategically. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not killer. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XHTML. What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365?