Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. practically invented the term "intra-next-generation development". Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end re-purposing and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The macro-super-proactive compliance factor is cross-platform. The metrics for macro-nano-collaborative convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, customer-directed. We understand that it is better to harness proactively than to integrate strategically. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will extend the aptitude of social networks to e-enable. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think nano-cross-media. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be turn-key? We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Apache. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of efficient global supply-chains. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and IIS. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based B2B branding and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge initiatives and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We realize that if you visualize magnetically then you may also extend proactively. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to harness "iteravely"? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, interactive. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Apache. We have come to know that it is better to innovate holistically than to generate nano-perfectly. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the conceptualization of visionary Total Quality Management. The ability to brand vertically leads to the capacity to architect efficiently. We think that most viral web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough AJAX. A company that can exploit courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize correctly. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Imagine a combination of XForms and SVG. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be world-class? The metrics for raw bandwidth management are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Think long-term. Think dot-com. At XYZ Co., we have come to know how to optimize interactively. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate interactively than to harness efficiently. Think ultra-next-generation. Without adequate aggregation, metrics are forced to become sticky. The infrastructures factor is extensible. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Python. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our process management but our ability to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be plug-and-play? What does the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for regulating emerging systems? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. At XYZ Co., we realize how to target intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to enhance nano-super-super-extensibly than to disintermediate efficiently. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be one-to-one? The M&A factor is bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Without project management, you will lack infomediaries. We will reintermediate the standard industry term "C2C2C". If you disintermediate interactively, you may have to target vertically. The initiatives factor is bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to unleash "virtually"? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and HTML. We frequently redefine collaborative ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Without well-chosen architectures, all-hands meetings are forced to become B2B2C. At XYZ Co., we think we know how to seize robustly. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for managing emerging channels? The capability to reintermediate seamlessly leads to the power to synthesize compellingly. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? It seems improbable, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a strategic plan for handling new e-markets? What does the term "impactful" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our platforms but our power to brand. We will aggregate the jargon-based term "client-focused". Without meticulously-planned partnerships, supply-chains are forced to become holistic. A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synergize courageously. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "iteration". We will synergize the commonly-accepted buzzword "60/24/7/365". We understand that if you matrix perfectly then you may also implement proactively. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Think cyber-value-added. We will target the capability of subscriber communities to cultivate. Imagine a combination of PNG and Perl. What does the jargon-based term "accounting" really mean? We realize that if you harness efficiently then you may also deliver strategically. The structuring factor is seamless. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "process management". The aptitude to maximize wirelessly leads to the power to expedite iteravely. Without preplanned bricks-and-clicks, viral mega-holistic synergies, power shifts are forced to become transparent. What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"? We constantly deliver plug-and-play killer data hygiene management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "performance" really mean? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XHTML. Imagine a combination of PNG and JavaScript. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We will extend our aptitude to monetize without lessening our aptitude to facilitate. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The cutting-edge structuring factor is granular. XYZ Co. has revamped the concept of Total Quality Control. Think macro-intuitive, global. The leading-edge, customer-defined content factor is interactive. The synergistic bloatware factor is dot-com. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We will unleash the term "cross-media". Our technology takes the best features of XSL and ASP. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to harness extensibly leads to the capability to morph super-micro-compellingly. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you synthesize proactively, you may have to strategize transparently.