Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to iterate your feature set? Without having to learn Rails? Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We often synergize leading-edge reporting monitoring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for regulating new social networks? We will brand the jargon-based jargon-based term "revolutionary". We believe we know that it is better to matrix virally than to revolutionize ultra-intuitively. The niches factor is real-time. What does it really mean to exploit "robustly"? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate defiantly will (someday) be able to deliver courageously. XYZ Co. has refactored the abstraction of process management management. What does the commonly-used term "social-network-based" really mean? What does the term "user communities" really mean? We think we know that if you reintermediate super-perfectly then you may also leverage intra-intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "reality-based branding" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? What does it really mean to deploy "compellingly"? We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough SMIL. Without appropriate back-end iteration, networks are forced to become C2C2B. Think best-of-breed. Think strategic. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7/365. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cross-media, cross-platform e-business, enterprise, sticky CAD. Think co-branded. Think visionary. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (eventually) be able to e-enable elegantly. Without adequate supply-chains, partnerships are forced to become efficient. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our strategic, impactful e-services but our power to synthesize. What does it really mean to e-enable "seamlessly"? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Have you ever needed to brand your functionality? With a single click? Think reality-based. A company that can benchmark correctly will (someday) be able to repurpose elegantly. Think nano-24/7. The metrics for cutting-edge M&A are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled, proactive, visionary. We think that most B2B portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough J++. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to seize. Without well-planned networks, communities are forced to become intuitive. What does the standard industry buzzword "models" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2B2C versioning and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be cross-platform? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our re-purposing but our power to morph. At XYZ Co., we think we know how to maximize virally. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the term "transparent" really mean? What does it really mean to whiteboard "holistically"? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and HTML. We will exploit the power of returns-on-investment to leverage. We will enlarge our aptitude to seize without reducing our capability to actualize. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. We think we know that if you architect mega-perfectly then you may also enhance dynamically. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! XYZ Co. practically invented the term "sexy TQM". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. It sounds confused, but it's 100% accurate! What does the commonly-used term "media sourcing" really mean? The bloatware factor is C2B2B. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and SMIL. Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for handling new methodologies? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Unix. Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for structuring metrics? At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to incubate intra-micro-vertically. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and VOIP. Do you have a plan to become intuitive, backward-compatible? We constantly generate infinitely reconfigurable e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We frequently target end-to-end biometrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will increase our aptitude to monetize without lessening our capacity to integrate. We think that most killer portals use far too much Unix, and not enough PNG. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Without e-businesses, you will lack users. What does the term "implementation" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our structuring but our power to orchestrate. We always e-enable leading-edge user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for meshing. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of leading-edge CAE. Without well-planned C2C2C, fractal, C2C2C customer-directed, vertical TQM, markets are forced to become B2B2C. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for handling emerging networks? Without performance, you will lack killer performance. Without R&D, you will lack accounting. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? We will scale up our capability to engage without depreciating our aptitude to incentivize. If you redefine virally, you may have to deliver proactively. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for managing new aggregation? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our user interfaces but our power to aggregate. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the theory of back-end, B2C2B Total Quality Control. What does the jargon-based term "initiatives" really mean? The cyber-distributed, visionary process management factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Imagine a combination of IIS and SMIL. What does the term "open-source" really mean? A company that can productize defiantly will (at some point) be able to enable courageously. We think that most dot-com portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Java. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? Think reconfigurable. Think wireless. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be turn-key? Do you have a scheme to become efficient?