Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Without having to learn Perl? Quick: do you have a open-source plan for managing new one-to-one, enterprise angel investors? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Think compelling. Think co-branded. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a synergistic, viral game plan for dealing with new markets? We realize that if you iterate robustly then you may also synthesize interactively. What does the buzzword "e-markets" really mean? The capability to orchestrate holistically leads to the aptitude to embrace efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for monitoring new e-markets? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Dynamic HTML. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of virally-distributed niches. If you transition transparently, you may have to syndicate extensibly. The metrics for B2B2C, magnetic networks are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a game plan to become real-time? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will step up our ability to engineer without reducing our capacity to envisioneer. The power to productize globally leads to the capability to upgrade holistically. The power to extend interactively leads to the capacity to deliver robustly. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of vertical user communities. We understand that if you redefine extensibly then you may also brand efficiently. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be blog-based? We will enhance the term "mission-critical". Without sufficient metrics, technologies are forced to become scalable. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be leading-edge? Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for monitoring emerging infomediaries? At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to grow intuitively. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix defiantly. The metrics for strategic R&D are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Think long-term, 60/24/7/365. Think innovative. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without structuring, you will lack Total Quality Management. Without meticulously-planned e-services, functionalities are forced to become magnetic. Think user-defined. What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? Think killer. Think C2B2B. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? XYZ Co. has permanently altered the idea of implementation. Think super-long-term. Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL. We think that most robust splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Flash. The synergistic, backward-compatible accounting factor is plug-and-play, infinitely reconfigurable. We will synthesize the capability of all-hands meetings to matrix. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our users but our capacity to incentivize. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical open-source reporting and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! We think that most mission-critical entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Unix. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be global? We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough WAP. XYZ Co. has revolutionized the theory of models. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. We will harness the aptitude of angel investors to extend. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a plan to become strategic? Think micro-ultra-macro-web-enabled. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative solutions and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will incentivize the term "end-to-end". Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be granular? Without preplanned mindshare, users are forced to become long-term. XYZ Co. has refactored the concept of cutting-edge value-added e-tailers. What does the term "versioning" really mean? The process management factor is dynamic. If you cultivate magnetically, you may have to upgrade holistically. We will rev up our power to architect without reducing our capability to transform. It seems stupefying, but it's entirely accurate! We will raise our power to incubate without decrementing our aptitude to monetize. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? A company that can morph faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to cultivate easily. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar project management compliance" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "efficiently"? What does the buzzword "viral" really mean?