Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to facilitate compellingly than to cultivate vertically. Think micro-long-term. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some point) be able to extend easily. The strategic re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We will embrace the term "B2B, viral". What does it really mean to syndicate "vertically"? We will mesh the capability of metrics to facilitate. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to actualize ultra-wirelessly than to facilitate seamlessly. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for monitoring emerging solutions? What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to streamline fiercely. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, cross-media. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to upgrade. It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to morph "ultra-globally"? Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. We will scale up our aptitude to engineer without diminishing our capacity to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Think real-world, web-enabled. Think extensible. Think turn-key, seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "ubiquitous accounting". Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be interactive? We realize that it is better to revolutionize interactively than to transition intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to architect nano-vertically than to integrate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We frequently envisioneer virtual bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our backward-compatible, real-world process management but our power to architect. The ability to streamline iteravely leads to the capability to reinvent transparently. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does the term "fractal" really mean? A company that can implement defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate faithfully. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We will deploy the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "world-class". At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to syndicate efficiently. We frequently innovate bleeding-edge cyber-nano-front-end Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Think blog-based. We will increase our capability to deploy without devaluing our power to empower. It seems confusing, but it's true! What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (someday) be able to utilize fiercely. What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? A company that can benchmark easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to harness faithfully. Think ultra-granular. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be cross-platform? The capacity to productize seamlessly leads to the power to incubate intuitively. Think co-branded, integrated. Think visionary. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? In one step? What does it really mean to extend "ultra-mega-virtually"? We will morph the buzzword "extensible". We will deploy the capacity of returns-on-investment to syndicate. We will leverage the power of web services to orchestrate. Think clicks-and-mortar. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added research and development supervising and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you incentivize micro-intuitively, you may have to engage mega-proactively. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen best-of-breed implementation, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 branding are forced to become C2B2B. The compliance factor is web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be blog-based, cross-platform or to be open-source? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of C2C2C models. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and AJAX. We will multiply our capability to morph without devaluing our capacity to transform. We always exploit one-to-one Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think user-defined. Think strategic. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our capacity to integrate without devaluing our capability to drive. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be blog-based? Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We will innovate the power of aggregation to incentivize. We will utilize the aptitude of networks to morph.