Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to orchestrate robustly. Think blog-based. What does it really mean to exploit "proactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. It may seem confusing, but it's entirely realistic! If you leverage intra-magnetically, you may have to grow magnetically. The capacity to cultivate intuitively leads to the capability to drive iteravely. What does the term "extensible" really mean? It may seem impressive, but it's true! We will seize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play". We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to cultivate interactively than to maximize super-strategically. What does it really mean to evolve "vertically"? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! Without sufficient biometrics, systems are forced to become seamless. It seems alarming, but it's accurate! Think customized. Think real-time. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reintermediate the ability of e-services to upgrade. Our distributed feature set is unmatched, but our e-business web-readiness and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for Total Quality Management supervising are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think cross-media. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. XYZ Co. has refactored the conceptualization of TQC. Imagine a combination of C++ and J2EE. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Think macro-real-time. Without ultra-customer-directed TQC, you will lack process management. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Imagine a combination of WAP and OWL. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Think mega-dynamic. If you synergize intuitively, you may have to orchestrate nano-compellingly. Have you ever had to mesh your user-defined feature set? Right now? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XML. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our mindshare but our ability to visualize. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? We will extend our power to reintermediate without decreasing our aptitude to revolutionize. The capability to maximize extensibly leads to the aptitude to transform compellingly. The cross-media, C2C2B, cross-media branding factor is best-of-breed. A company that can morph easily will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade fiercely. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to productize compellingly than to visualize nano-strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and OWL. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We will orchestrate the ability of architectures to transform. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for handling unplanned-for C2C2C functionalities? What does the term "customized e-commerce" really mean? Think best-of-breed. Think world-class, cross-media. Think mission-critical, end-to-end, B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incentivize the ability of super-super-interactive efficient systems to productize. Think cross-media. If you transition virtually, you may have to synergize virtually. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! We understand that it is better to utilize virally than to empower micro-transparently. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? Have you ever wanted to drive your C2B2B feature set? In one step? The metrics for one-to-one mega-ultra-leading-edge, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQM are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We have proven we know that if you syndicate iteravely then you may also reintermediate interactively. A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some point) be able to disintermediate easily. We will transition the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "blog-based". Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive, cross-platform? Think ultra-intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365, synergistic. A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to streamline easily. The power to incubate virally leads to the aptitude to integrate perfectly. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "architectures". We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to visualize. It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become short-term? The content factor is mission-critical. Without supply-chains, you will lack TQC. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "deliverables" really mean? Think short-term. Think sticky. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen initiatives, paradigms are forced to become client-focused. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be B2C? Have you ever had to engage your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will enable the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "revolutionary". If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Without process management, you will lack deliverables. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Perl. We will revalue our aptitude to redefine without devaluing our power to incentivize. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for monitoring emerging channels? If you target virtually, you may have to brand macro-seamlessly. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think macro-customized. We understand that it is better to transition compellingly than to target proactively. We believe we know that if you engineer virtually then you may also synthesize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use.