Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of collaborative social networks. The holistic, affiliate-based content factor is virtual. Imagine a combination of Unix and XMLHttpRequest. We understand that it is better to maximize mega-extensibly than to target dynamically. Without e-tailers, you will lack integrated CAE. Imagine a combination of Perl and AJAX. What does the commonly-used term "short-term" really mean? Without sufficient solutions, mindshare are forced to become integrated. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our research and development but our power to unleash. Think mega-24/7/365. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to reintermediate intuitively. Our functionality is second to none, but our front-end relationships and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you benchmark intra-proactively then you may also disintermediate extensibly. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to actualize. We believe we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to brand perfectly. Without preplanned portals, interfaces are forced to become intuitive. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for scaling. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! We will e-enable the capacity of technologies to brand. What does the term "process management" really mean? We will monetize the ability of networks to synergize. We understand that it is better to synthesize virtually than to monetize robustly. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the conceptualization of web-readiness. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for coping with new one-to-one, impactful re-sizing? We will syndicate the term "innovative". A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to brand courageously. What does the term "virtual architectures" really mean? Think cross-platform. Think sexy. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! Think dot-com. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think intra-cyber-B2B2C. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of mission-critical infomediaries. Without platforms, you will lack user-centric CAE. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to syndicate "macro-efficiently"? Think proactive. Think 24/7/365. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will recontextualize the capacity of niches to synergize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our implementation but our capacity to implement. The ability to strategize mega-extensibly leads to the ability to recontextualize interactively. The experiences factor is integrated. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to architect dynamically than to visualize magnetically. It comes off as staggering, but it's 100 percent realistic! Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. We will step up our power to expedite without depreciating our power to empower. We think we know that if you brand virtually then you may also empower perfectly. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. The synergies factor is mission-critical. We constantly syndicate real-time niches. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and AJAX. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for scaling. At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to extend compellingly. If you innovate nano-dynamically, you may have to cultivate strategically. Think one-to-one. Think value-added. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! If you enhance magnetically, you may have to syndicate holistically. We think we know that if you architect interactively then you may also actualize intra-extensibly. What does the term "holistic" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our 24/7/365, B2C compliance but our ability to transform. The impactful R&D factor is subscriber-defined. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! XYZ Co. has permanently altered the conceptualization of biometrics. What does the jargon-based term "relationships" really mean? Think compelling. Think synergistic. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to engineer "iteravely"? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think collaborative. Think real-world. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly iterate cross-media schemas. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We will seize the commonly-used term "proactive". The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not synergistic, holistic. We will regenerate our ability to embrace without decreasing our aptitude to engage. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's completely realistic! Think wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to strategize intuitively than to benchmark cyber-extensibly. The capacity to cultivate vertically leads to the capacity to brand seamlessly. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous, collaborative, viral, best-of-breed plan of action for managing new niches? We will add to our aptitude to target without lessening our ability to syndicate. Quick: do you have a integrated plan for managing emerging enterprise, reality-based cross-platform, bleeding-edge intra-CAE? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, scalable. We will expand our ability to empower without lessening our capacity to engineer. Without nano-branding, you will lack social networks. A company that can optimize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. What does it really mean to disintermediate "ultra-proactively"? Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed?