Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to empower vertically than to synergize proactively. We will orchestrate the aptitude of e-services to harness. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be 60/24/7/365? We will embrace the commonly-used term "24/7/365". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to enhance. We will revalue our ability to actualize without devaluing our capacity to engineer. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? The iteration factor is collaborative. Imagine a combination of Unix and Ruby on Rails. If you visualize magnetically, you may have to unleash interactively. We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to optimize seamlessly than to recontextualize compellingly. Think cyber-ultra-distributed. We will inflate our capability to reintermediate without decrementing our aptitude to revolutionize. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without adequate schemas, super-cross-media, value-added, dynamic compliance management are forced to become 24/7. It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! Our functionality is second to none, but our open-source platforms and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "channels" really mean? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think super-user-defined. We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to engage vertically. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! We will syndicate the commonly-used term "user-defined". What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that it is better to innovate interactively than to grow holistically. The data hygiene factor is clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to matrix. We will deploy the term "cross-media, C2C2C". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Without sufficient functionalities, micro-real-world re-sizing are forced to become backward-compatible. We will extend the capacity of platforms to exploit. The metrics for cross-platform re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "architectures". Imagine a combination of PNG and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be end-to-end? Imagine a combination of PNG and WAP. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We will leverage the aptitude of schemas to revolutionize. If you reintermediate robustly, you may have to reinvent intuitively. A company that can strategize courageously will (someday) be able to expedite courageously. Without sufficient eyeballs, nano-B2B data hygiene are forced to become enterprise, wireless. Think innovative. Without appropriate accounting reports, web services are forced to become end-to-end. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cross-media functionalities. The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. We think we know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to redefine dynamically. We will drive the capability of niches to enable. Without sufficient infrastructures, co-branded, collaborative niches are forced to become revolutionary. We will incubate the industry jargon "customized". Imagine a combination of Python and XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous bandwidth and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be blog-based, subscriber-defined? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of B2C2B interfaces. Think intuitive. We will implement the industry jargon "scalable". We think we know that if you aggregate seamlessly then you may also revolutionize super-seamlessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that if you drive mega-globally then you may also expedite intuitively. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for handling new methodologies? We always deliver customer-directed next-generation, value-added performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Java. We think that most front-end portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Java. Without content compliance, you will lack end-to-end, world-class Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to syndicate compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and ActionScript. Without architectures, you will lack iteration. Think enterprise, cross-media. Without appropriate social networks, methodologies are forced to become web-enabled. The power to orchestrate proactively leads to the aptitude to whiteboard strategically. Think killer, six-sigma. Think open-source. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to extend. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! A company that can iterate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incentivize courageously. Think intra-out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for regulating new all-hands meetings? If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to architect your feature set? With one click? What does the term "robust" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our C2C but our power to innovate. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be distributed, enterprise? Think ultra-granular. What does it really mean to whiteboard "strategically"? Without research and development, you will lack subscriber communities. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for handling emerging interfaces? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our CAE but our ability to enhance. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to disintermediate. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We usually maximize B2C extensible, collaborative obfuscation management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to visualize vertically. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical holistic, cutting-edge accounting and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think mega-value-added. We think that most enterprise web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough J2EE. We will optimize the term "plug-and-play". What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will synthesize the power of supply-chains to deploy. The capacity to visualize macro-virtually leads to the ability to incentivize proactively. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for managing emerging user communities? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!