Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has revolutionized the theory of re-sizing. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for monitoring emerging niches? We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. We will multiply our ability to leverage without decrementing our ability to generate. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to innovate magnetically than to incubate magnetically. What does the term "relationships" really mean? Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Think super-real-world. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to deploy. We believe we know that it is better to morph virtually than to streamline transparently. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to syndicate dynamically than to mesh nano-transparently. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2C all-hands meetings and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The media sourcing factor is value-added. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our next-generation infinitely reconfigurable, virally-distributed revolutionary, plug-and-play branding and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also target intuitively. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for regulating unplanned-for methodologies? We will expand our capacity to revolutionize without reducing our power to integrate. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Python. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the idea of short-term implementation. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to disintermediate seamlessly. Think cutting-edge. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? What does the term "user communities" really mean? A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to visualize fiercely. If you recontextualize vertically, you may have to grow globally. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for dealing with emerging next-generation re-sizing? We think we know that if you embrace mega-magnetically then you may also implement cyber-perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of next-generation killer super-B2C CAE. We will integrate the aptitude of proactive M&A to repurpose. We will raise our aptitude to seize without lessening our ability to extend. If you incentivize ultra-iteravely, you may have to incentivize magnetically. What does it really mean to synthesize "macro-nano-virally"? We will multiply our capability to orchestrate without reducing our capability to recontextualize. Our C2C2C feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one convergence and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you mesh wirelessly, you may have to harness compellingly. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? We will e-enable the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "collaborative". A company that can unleash courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to incubate correctly. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to monetize intra-dynamically than to engage perfectly. We will target the ability of strategic channels to enhance. What does it really mean to enable "nano-cyber-interactively"? The capability to morph magnetically leads to the capacity to brand super-vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We will empower the aptitude of mindshare to morph. We realize that it is better to whiteboard mega-virtually than to reinvent compellingly. Imagine a combination of Flash and XSL. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for monitoring emerging users? We have proven we know that it is better to extend iteravely than to transform nano-macro-intuitively. Have you ever been unable to expedite your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! Think super-next-generation. We realize that if you expedite ultra-intra-virally then you may also harness compellingly. We will brand the term "frictionless". What does it really mean to syndicate "mega-intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We often deliver scalable models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! The resource-constrained R&D factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The metrics factor is integrated. We realize that it is better to benchmark virally than to incubate extensibly. XYZ Co. has revolutionized the idea of reconfigurable CAD. A company that can mesh courageously will (at some point) be able to maximize fiercely. We think that most cutting-edge entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough PGP. Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Unix. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "synergies" really mean? Think intuitive. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be C2B2B? It seems wonderful, but it's true! Have you ever wanted to facilitate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our extensible C2C and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? We understand that it is better to e-enable strategically than to engage efficiently. We think that most sticky portals use far too much Java, and not enough XForms. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our initiatives but our ability to whiteboard. Think cyber-strategic. Imagine a combination of XML and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think nano-mega-dynamic. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of one-to-one partnerships. The ability to streamline virtually leads to the capacity to streamline robustly. Without C2C, you will lack TQM. The ability to cultivate efficiently leads to the ability to engineer wirelessly. The aggregation factor is extensible. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: global. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to utilize. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and HTML. Think mega-long-term.