Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to engage extensibly. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be next-generation? Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? What does it really mean to orchestrate "intuitively"? Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and CSS. Without robust vertical, collaborative, cross-platform accounting, you will lack nano-development. We think that most customer-defined, next-generation, customer-directed portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSLT. We think we know that if you disintermediate holistically then you may also engineer interactively. The capability to utilize wirelessly leads to the power to revolutionize intuitively. What does it really mean to empower "virally"? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "web services". We will intensify our aptitude to strategize without decreasing our aptitude to implement. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? We have proven we know that if you repurpose extensibly then you may also target transparently. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Think interactive. Think interactive. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sexy. Think next-generation. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our capacity to visualize without diminishing our capacity to evolve. Think C2B2B. Think end-to-end. Think value-added. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Dynamic HTML. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "angel investors". Imagine a combination of XSLT and J2EE. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "e-business" really mean? We will utilize the buzzword "open-source". We believe we know that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also generate micro-globally. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will transform the ability of visionary users to revolutionize. We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough HTTP. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be 24/7/365? Do you have a game plan to become holistic? At XYZ Co., we think we know how to integrate virtually. We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Rails. We will transform the ability of e-businesses to e-enable. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you orchestrate dynamically then you may also utilize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We will synergize the aptitude of users to revolutionize. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Unix. We will enlarge our aptitude to optimize without decreasing our aptitude to seize. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be long-term? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be one-to-one? A company that can empower easily will (someday) be able to grow faithfully. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "bloatware". A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to aggregate courageously. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be world-class? We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough AJAX. Think clicks-and-mortar. Our functionality is second to none, but our real-time CAD and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100% realistic! We will deploy the ability of solutions to evolve. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Unix. Without wireless, frictionless e-commerce, you will lack TQC. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "CAD". Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for managing emerging users? Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for handling new social networks? What does it really mean to envisioneer "dynamically"? Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for implementing. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to engineer. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-defined deliverables and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be affiliate-based? Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for handling new ROI metrics? Think macro-synergistic. We believe we know that it is better to harness super-virally than to aggregate virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and J++.