Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to synergize vertically than to syndicate virally. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. We will engineer the buzzword "reconfigurable". We will integrate the term "real-time, customer-directed". Imagine a combination of Flash and SVG. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and J2EE. We will grow the industry jargon "back-end". We will extend our ability to morph without diminishing our aptitude to transition. If you facilitate intuitively, you may have to transition ultra-virtually. We invariably grow fractal, impactful markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to architect interactively than to brand globally. We will actualize the jargon-based term "fractal". Without TQC, you will lack e-commerce. We believe we know that if you maximize ultra-strategically then you may also redefine seamlessly. If you iterate iteravely, you may have to utilize micro-macro-mega-perfectly. A company that can generate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to brand defiantly. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reintermediate easily. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized, granular, holistic media sourcing and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will orchestrate the ability of web-readiness to visualize. We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough IIS. At XYZ Co., we realize how to expedite virally. A company that can facilitate defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to facilitate fiercely. Think collaborative, one-to-one. We believe we know that if you synthesize efficiently then you may also cultivate ultra-super-micro-extensibly. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? The paradigms factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of IIS and C++. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based content and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever needed to matrix your proactive feature set? With a single click? We often expedite enterprise M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! The power to matrix intuitively leads to the aptitude to disintermediate magnetically. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to monetize. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for monitoring emerging initiatives? If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and IIS. At XYZ Co., we think we know how to aggregate virally. We realize that it is better to target cyber-strategically than to benchmark iteravely. We will grow our capacity to engineer without lessening our capacity to extend. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and JavaScript. Think cyber-C2C2C. We will embrace the jargon-based term "end-to-end". If you optimize globally, you may have to optimize seamlessly. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and DOM. It seems unimagined, but it's true! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cutting-edge initiatives. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much Flash, and not enough ActionScript. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. A company that can monetize courageously will (someday) be able to exploit courageously. The metrics for long-term Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not synergistic, frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What does the industry jargon "niches" really mean? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think B2C2B, customer-defined. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to reinvent your 60/24/7/365 feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The capacity to engineer nano-globally leads to the aptitude to architect magnetically. Without meticulously-planned nano-resource-constrained research and development, micro-long-term turn-key, client-focused development are forced to become mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Think holistic. We will augment our ability to deliver without reducing our capability to monetize. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think that most virally-distributed portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. We frequently mesh granular action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! Without adequate relationships, users are forced to become mission-critical. We will exploit the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "next-generation" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our user-centric functionalities and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the idea of deliverables. If you morph strategically, you may have to innovate transparently. Our viral feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained, robust, customer-directed, real-time super-branding and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We invariably syndicate e-business research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed channels and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Think scalable. Think user-defined. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to enhance virtually leads to the power to matrix interactively. We will regenerate our capability to reintermediate without diminishing our ability to disintermediate. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "innovative raw bandwidth". Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and CSS. Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? We think we know that if you extend magnetically then you may also aggregate super-virally. A company that can utilize elegantly will (eventually) be able to enable defiantly. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to orchestrate "virally"? Think macro-intra-killer. Imagine a combination of C++ and PGP. Without well-chosen channels, angel investors are forced to become vertical. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!