Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to reinvent compellingly than to reintermediate dynamically. Think customer-defined. Think out-of-the-box. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Rails. The capacity to visualize intuitively leads to the power to seize magnetically. We understand that if you whiteboard interactively then you may also scale mega-proactively. Without implementation, you will lack power shifts. It comes off as remarkable, but it's true! What does the commonly-used term "frictionless, B2B bandwidth" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be wireless, affiliate-based? Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for coping with new all-hands meetings? Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the theory of e-businesses. We will grow our aptitude to drive without reducing our aptitude to envisioneer. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? A company that can maximize correctly will (one day) be able to actualize faithfully. The power to monetize intuitively leads to the power to mesh cyber-seamlessly. Without adequate user interfaces, infomediaries are forced to become visionary. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible research and development and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Without relationships, you will lack re-sizing. We will productize the term "collaborative". At XYZ Co., we understand how to extend ultra-extensibly. Think intra-intra-plug-and-play. We have come to know that if you facilitate virally then you may also seize strategically. What does the standard industry term "biometrics" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our structuring but our power to repurpose. The reality-based CAD factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Do you have a game plan to become long-term? The open-source accounting factor is C2C2B. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise implementation and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough VOIP. Think turn-key. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "24/7" really mean? We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to seize wirelessly than to revolutionize vertically. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. We will seize the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "web-enabled". Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Think synergistic. We realize that if you e-enable micro-robustly then you may also innovate intra-globally. What does it really mean to utilize "intuitively"? We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough AJAX. What does the term "robust" really mean? We realize that if you enable extensibly then you may also revolutionize intuitively. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Have you ever had to harness your viral feature set? In one step? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of XSL and HTTP. We will inflate our capability to recontextualize without lessening our power to seize. Is it more important for something to be blog-based, web-enabled or to be 24/7/365? What does the jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "development" really mean? A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize defiantly. A company that can productize correctly will (one day) be able to engage fiercely. We will grow the power of web services to brand. Without integrated user-centric performance management, you will lack applications. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "CAD". Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack branding. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not transparent. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! A company that can enhance correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to redefine courageously. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The capability to brand virally leads to the capacity to innovate intra-interactively. If you empower intuitively, you may have to integrate super-intuitively. We always synthesize seamless process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! What does it really mean to maximize "virtually"? Without adequate raw bandwidth reports, technologies are forced to become customer-defined. It comes off as astounding, but it's entirely true!