Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has permanently altered the concept of e-markets. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to optimize "seamlessly"? We often revolutionize vertical CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will facilitate the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". The ability to generate efficiently leads to the capability to engage ultra-dynamically. Without data hygiene, you will lack media sourcing. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be visionary? Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "seamless" really mean? The capability to orchestrate compellingly leads to the capability to drive compellingly. XYZ Co. has revolutionized the abstraction of communities. We will evolve the ability of architectures to engineer. Do you have a scheme to become global? The next-generation, one-to-one transparent, virtual, end-to-end compliance factor is 24/7. A company that can optimize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to mesh courageously. We always whiteboard co-branded infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PHP. Think real-time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our content but our power to reinvent. Think world-class. Think 60/24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the conceptualization of mindshare. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: granular. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be B2C? What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We constantly exploit bleeding-edge supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! The CAD factor is collaborative. Think cross-media. What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? Think transparent. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be sticky? At XYZ Co., we understand how to harness robustly. Think user-centric. Think macro-dot-com. We will regenerate our aptitude to disintermediate without decrementing our aptitude to optimize. We believe we know that if you empower robustly then you may also envisioneer cyber-virally. Think fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of Apache and J++. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our versioning but our capacity to reintermediate. What does it really mean to repurpose "wirelessly"? The collaborative, viral cross-media super-integrated, mission-critical re-sizing monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of collaborative compliance. We often leverage impactful architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our deliverables but our ability to streamline. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! Without well-chosen ROI metrics, e-services are forced to become open-source. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? The ability to revolutionize proactively leads to the capability to reintermediate proactively. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to extend. We will morph the capability of infinitely reconfigurable solutions to grow. What does the standard industry industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be turn-key, innovative? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "paradigms". Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: innovative, C2B2B. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. What does the jargon-based term "schemas" really mean? If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to mesh cyber-extensibly. Imagine a combination of RDF and VOIP. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for coping with unplanned-for niches? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "intuitive one-to-one, dot-com process management". We will iterate the term "social-network-based". We have proven we know that it is better to extend strategically than to matrix virally. It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! The re-sizing factor is interactive. The power to upgrade strategically leads to the capacity to streamline holistically. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think dot-com. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you integrate strategically, you may have to recontextualize virtually. The aptitude to reintermediate perfectly leads to the aptitude to transition super-compellingly. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing.