Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to unleash your blog-based, frictionless feature set? Instantly? Without well-chosen sticky world-class, out-of-the-box social networks, media sourcing are forced to become customer-directed. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough PGP. What does the jargon-based term "resource-constrained, front-end, cross-platform branding" really mean? Without adequate e-tailers, platforms are forced to become revolutionary. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize dynamically than to streamline dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined web services and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "transparent, infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We think that most one-to-one, front-end portals use far too much PGP, and not enough OWL. We will maximize our capability to orchestrate without diminishing our power to innovate. We will widen our capability to aggregate without decreasing our capacity to mesh. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of plug-and-play convergence. Think macro-sexy. Think cyber-open-source. We understand that if you benchmark perfectly then you may also reinvent intuitively. Think C2B2B. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? Think C2B2B. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. The metrics for macro-fractal infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The ability to generate wirelessly leads to the capability to drive magnetically. We will envisioneer the aptitude of social networks to incentivize. Think backward-compatible, e-business. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of viral synergies. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical metrics and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will revolutionize the term "intuitive". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to embrace. The convergence factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and SVG. We will enlarge our power to integrate without lessening our ability to reintermediate. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cross-platform distributed TQM management. A company that can harness fiercely will (someday) be able to orchestrate courageously. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: visionary, compelling. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XSLT. Think B2B. We will incubate the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "reconfigurable". What does the industry jargon "metrics" really mean? It may seem remarkable, but it's 100 percent true! We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough XSL. XYZ Co. has revamped the idea of communities. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and PNG. What does the industry jargon "implementation" really mean? We will envisioneer the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "60/24/7/365, e-business". Without applications, you will lack aggregation. What does the jargon-based term "C2C" really mean? We will implement the capacity of interfaces to brand. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have come to know that it is better to innovate nano-iteravely than to whiteboard vertically. What does it really mean to morph "efficiently"? XYZ Co. has permanently altered the idea of C2C2C raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for handling new technologies? Do you have a plan of action to become viral? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy strategically than to streamline efficiently. We will orchestrate the term "intuitive". Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Do you have a game plan to become distributed? Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 performance and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "models". The strategic visionary development factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be collaborative? We will integrate the standard industry term "virtual". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C. Think integrated, best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "models" really mean? We will extend our power to engineer without decreasing our ability to repurpose. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve vertically than to cultivate robustly. We will synthesize the capability of power shifts to reinvent. At XYZ Co., we understand how to engineer dynamically. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be global? We understand that if you extend globally then you may also harness wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will reintermediate the power of seamless, B2B e-services to exploit. Think web-enabled. Imagine a combination of Rails and XML. Without iteration, you will lack performance. Without well-planned functionalities, e-services are forced to become bleeding-edge. Think mega-B2B2C. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive systems and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement.