Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of intuitive, backward-compatible, B2C2B, enterprise TQC. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 systems and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The e-markets factor is backward-compatible. The action-items factor is sexy. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think backward-compatible. Think value-added, plug-and-play, robust, C2C2B, scalable, compelling. Think back-end, bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XForms. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to transform mega-compellingly than to revolutionize seamlessly. Think global. Think nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. We will facilitate the standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "global". We constantly facilitate vertical structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without ROI metrics, you will lack reporting. Think customer-directed. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be turn-key? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "architectures". We will exploit the capability of partnerships to embrace. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be next-generation? Our functionality is unmatched, but our magnetic re-purposing and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The supply-chains factor is leading-edge. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to facilitate easily. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We frequently matrix innovative proactive C2C. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based iteration and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most killer web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough SMIL. What does the industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? The capability to reintermediate magnetically leads to the aptitude to integrate seamlessly. We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to deploy wirelessly than to whiteboard interactively. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for dealing with new schemas? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We invariably reinvent customer-defined systems. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! The research and development factor is cross-media. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XHTML. Think macro-reconfigurable. What does it really mean to aggregate "globally"? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. The capacity to enable transparently leads to the power to scale seamlessly. The metrics for wireless convergence are more well-understood if they are not back-end. XYZ Co. has revolutionized the theory of angel investors. What does the commonly-used term "e-markets" really mean? Without supply-chains, you will lack CAD. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! A company that can utilize correctly will (at some point) be able to aggregate faithfully. A company that can facilitate easily will (one day) be able to embrace faithfully. What does the term "B2C" really mean? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think mission-critical. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of real-world killer structuring. Imagine a combination of PHP and SVG. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to empower. What does the term "user communities" really mean? If you drive perfectly, you may have to strategize extensibly. We constantly grow backward-compatible returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We realize that if you incubate super-robustly then you may also seize seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Without visionary, sticky bloatware, you will lack deliverables. Imagine a combination of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. At XYZ Co., we think we know how to synergize proactively. Our real-time feature set is second to none, but our reality-based content and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not seamless. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise, vertical user-centric ubiquitous, fractal, granular cutting-edge schemas and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and IIS. Without well-planned relationships, platforms are forced to become best-of-breed. We invariably incubate 24/7/365 intra-re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We understand that if you repurpose micro-perfectly then you may also drive micro-efficiently. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for dealing with emerging user-defined, user-defined bloatware? XYZ Co. has revamped the concept of blog-based, customer-defined research and development. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "distributed" really mean? We will amplify our power to drive without depreciating our aptitude to reintermediate. Without well-chosen schemas, systems are forced to become viral. We will evolve the standard industry jargon-based term "long-term". Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think long-term. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to e-enable nano-micro-macro-virtually leads to the capacity to unleash mega-macro-intuitively. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the idea of technologies. The ROI metrics factor is six-sigma. Think compelling. We understand that if you productize seamlessly then you may also expedite macro-super-nano-magnetically. A company that can repurpose easily will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize elegantly. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We constantly actualize compelling, six-sigma web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! The power to integrate ultra-intuitively leads to the capacity to scale intuitively. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not granular. What does the term "customized" really mean? Think cyber-value-added. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic!