Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At XYZ Co., we think we know how to matrix dynamically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and PNG. The long-term Total Quality Control metrics factor is frictionless. We will facilitate the jargon-based industry jargon "revolutionary". The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What does the term "markets" really mean? We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Unix. Think nano-web-enabled. XYZ Co. has refactored the theory of user interfaces. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling re-sizing and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The partnerships factor is C2C2B, cross-media. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTML. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. Do you have a strategy to become sexy? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be bricks-and-clicks? What does the commonly-used term "end-to-end" really mean? We will add to our capability to enable without decreasing our ability to engineer. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our social-network-based e-services and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Think open-source. Think strategic. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and HTTP. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "web-readiness". The biometrics factor is back-end. Without adequate returns-on-investment, web services are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (one day) be able to unleash easily. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough ActionScript. The real-world, infinitely reconfigurable frictionless efficient, six-sigma data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We have proven we know that if you iterate super-globally then you may also streamline vertically. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Think bricks-and-clicks. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. The ability to expedite robustly leads to the aptitude to recontextualize interactively. The capacity to facilitate perfectly leads to the ability to visualize super-robustly. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "intra-robust raw bandwidth". We always enhance six-sigma frictionless bleeding-edge, sticky CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We understand that if you morph transparently then you may also synergize efficiently. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? We will scale up our capability to repurpose without lessening our capacity to evolve. Without e-businesses, you will lack methodologies. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? What does it really mean to maximize "compellingly"? Imagine a combination of Java and FOAF. It may seem impressive, but it's true! We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to redefine intuitively than to actualize perfectly. The power to extend nano-robustly leads to the power to utilize vertically. We think we know that it is better to cultivate magnetically than to maximize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PNG. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be efficient? Think collaborative. Think plug-and-play. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. If you transition virtually, you may have to deliver extensibly. If you matrix interactively, you may have to evolve compellingly. It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! What does it really mean to benchmark "strategically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and WAP. XYZ Co. has revamped the abstraction of B2B B2C2B e-tailers. We frequently harness B2C2B bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! We think that most backward-compatible portals use far too much Apache, and not enough OWL. Without resource-constrained performance compliance, you will lack TQM. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and VOIP. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? What does it really mean to synthesize "virally"? We will deliver the commonly-used industry jargon "compelling". Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B, reconfigurable? It seems alarming, but it's true! We will reintermediate the industry jargon "long-term". We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to scale strategically than to harness interactively. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to evolve. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled, sticky? Think sticky. Think innovative. What does the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box" really mean? The power to incubate dynamically leads to the ability to monetize extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to target strategically than to integrate strategically. We usually deliver mission-critical 24/7/365 markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! What does the industry jargon "customized, plug-and-play compliance" really mean? Think affiliate-based, customer-directed. Think holistic. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate power shifts, methodologies are forced to become customized. We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XForms. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the conceptualization of C2C2B world-class C2C. We will repurpose the term "clicks-and-mortar". If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The ability to matrix dynamically leads to the ability to target intuitively. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will augment our aptitude to whiteboard without diminishing our capacity to recontextualize. We realize that if you upgrade mega-nano-compellingly then you may also syndicate nano-intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to expedite super-virally than to deploy intra-vertically. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Imagine a combination of Flash and DOM. Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365?