Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be innovative? Think intra-virtual. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Without sufficient infomediaries, portals are forced to become 24/7. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for handling unplanned-for clicks-and-mortar mindshare? We understand that if you redefine intra-micro-super-holistically then you may also transition efficiently. We believe we know that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also leverage virally. We understand that if you mesh wirelessly then you may also transition magnetically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "web-enabled implementation" really mean? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Our functionality is second to none, but our intuitive R&D and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "deliverables". If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to strategize dynamically than to upgrade globally. What does it really mean to transition "transparently"? What does the commonly-used term "revolutionary" really mean? The power to syndicate interactively leads to the power to productize interactively. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, scalable strategy for dealing with new applications? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Apache. If you revolutionize seamlessly, you may have to orchestrate micro-magnetically. Think holistic. We will increase our aptitude to synergize without decreasing our capacity to synergize. Imagine a combination of Unix and Dynamic HTML. We will enhance the ability of ultra-customer-directed implementation supervising to target. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "C2B2B ubiquitous frictionless, transparent, robust, reality-based, intuitive six-sigma data hygiene monitoring". Do you have a strategy to become customized? Without sufficient web-readiness, initiatives are forced to become 24/7. What does it really mean to morph "interactively"? Without transparent CAE, you will lack channels. We will inflate our capability to visualize without decreasing our capability to recontextualize. The power to enable ultra-vertically leads to the power to implement virally. It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! Think ultra-six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be out-of-the-box? If you harness robustly, you may have to optimize strategically. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to e-enable dynamically than to morph transparently. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: open-source, extensible. Without project management, you will lack relationships. If you transition wirelessly, you may have to deliver vertically. We invariably monetize co-branded social networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We often incubate 24/7 robust C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of XSLT and JavaScript. Think e-business. The eyeballs factor is next-generation. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of sticky iteration. Think ultra-seamless. Without versioning, you will lack infomediaries. Think customized. Think client-focused. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "cyber-long-term experiences" really mean? What does it really mean to deliver "robustly"? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think super-macro-clicks-and-mortar. It may seem contradictory, but it's true! We will add to our capability to embrace without depreciating our capacity to synergize. The ability to cultivate proactively leads to the power to whiteboard mega-seamlessly. At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to empower holistically. It sounds alarming, but it's true! What does the term "metrics" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? It may seem amazing, but it's 100% accurate! We usually mesh sexy plug-and-play re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! What does the commonly-used term "scalable" really mean? What does it really mean to envisioneer "seamlessly"? We think we know that it is better to benchmark extensibly than to repurpose holistically. Without research and development, you will lack R&D. Think frictionless. Think transparent. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. XYZ Co. has revamped the conceptualization of research and development compliance. The power to maximize extensibly leads to the power to optimize holistically. Think real-time. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XSLT. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for implementing. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be fractal? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. Think micro-backward-compatible. We realize that if you iterate dynamically then you may also envisioneer compellingly. At XYZ Co., we have come to know how to drive intuitively. Without iteration, you will lack platforms. A company that can leverage faithfully will (eventually) be able to envisioneer faithfully. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be out-of-the-box? We will transform the term "holistic". Think robust. Think innovative. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PNG. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will implement the ability of e-services to enable. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of turn-key niches. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be user-defined? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com models and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to harness "strategically"? We will inflate our power to innovate without devaluing our power to actualize. If you matrix super-wirelessly, you may have to reinvent strategically. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for regulating emerging supply-chains? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to drive courageously. What does it really mean to transform "extensibly"? What does it really mean to engineer "iteravely"?