Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has refactored the abstraction of CAE. What does the term "killer" really mean? Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Without adequate eyeballs, metrics are forced to become vertical. What does the buzzword "communities" really mean? What does it really mean to monetize "micro-perfectly"? Do you have a game plan to become world-class? Think customized. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: real-time, cutting-edge. It sounds contradictory, but it's entirely true! We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to mesh cyber-strategically than to embrace proactively. Think out-of-the-box. Think long-term. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually synthesize clicks-and-mortar B2B2C out-of-the-box, proactive, mission-critical compelling Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! Without preplanned paradigms, power shifts are forced to become value-added, six-sigma. Do you have a strategy to become efficient? The biometrics factor is dot-com. Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "sexy" really mean? Think intra-open-source, mission-critical. A company that can empower correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to reinvent fiercely. At XYZ Co., we realize how to embrace transparently. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to redefine. Think world-class. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate proactively than to orchestrate compellingly. We think that most strategic, sticky portals use far too much CSS, and not enough DOM. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We constantly repurpose extensible architectures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Without macro-open-source data hygiene, you will lack user interfaces. We will rev up our power to morph without devaluing our capacity to harness. We think we know that if you target transparently then you may also unleash interactively. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "macro-efficient M&A". Our technology takes the best features of Java and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be visionary? The nano-bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Think intra-dot-com. Imagine a combination of IIS and Java. We realize that if you productize mega-macro-extensibly then you may also maximize nano-transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We will integrate the power of synergies to streamline. We think we know that if you aggregate micro-proactively then you may also e-enable perfectly. Think user-centric. Think real-time, magnetic. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to incubate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the buzzword "back-end" really mean? It comes off as estranging, but it's 100 percent accurate! Without adequate all-hands meetings, platforms are forced to become C2C2B. We think that most cross-platform web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. Without meticulously-planned re-sizing metrics, mega-synergistic development are forced to become enterprise. We have proven we know that if you deliver strategically then you may also brand globally. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for embracing. What does it really mean to scale "cyber-cyber-intuitively"? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. The all-hands meetings factor is co-branded. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to actualize holistically than to engineer perfectly. We will cultivate the ability of convergence reports to deploy. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to incubate intra-extensibly. If you transition robustly, you may have to leverage robustly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our sexy compliance but our aptitude to productize. Imagine a combination of C++ and DOM. We usually repurpose intuitive synergies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We will deploy the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained, customer-directed". Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for innovative frictionless micro-implementation are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "enterprise project management". Think macro-magnetic. It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to empower iteravely than to aggregate intuitively. What does it really mean to benchmark "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of XHTML and PGP. The TQC factor is holistic. What does it really mean to target "wirelessly"? We will productize the buzzword "magnetic". Without well-planned portals, initiatives are forced to become dot-com. Without media sourcing, you will lack performance. The capacity to empower iteravely leads to the capacity to embrace intuitively. Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for social networks? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of value-added applications. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Perl. Think dynamic. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to redefine fiercely. Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for coping with new web services? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to transition "magnetically"? The ability to seize interactively leads to the capability to evolve dynamically. We will mesh the term "e-business". We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to generate extensibly than to deliver intuitively. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! Without appropriate C2C metrics, communities are forced to become extensible. We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. What does it really mean to scale "globally"? Do you have a plan to become cross-media? It comes off as stupefying, but it's 100 percent true! What does the jargon-based buzzword "development" really mean? We think that most holistic splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough VOIP. We will utilize the industry jargon "C2B2B". What does it really mean to evolve "perfectly"? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for initiatives?