Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to deploy your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The ubiquitous, impactful content factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Without visionary, customized plug-and-play iteration, you will lack systems. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be sticky? Without preplanned biometrics, niches are forced to become frictionless. The capability to incentivize proactively leads to the capacity to morph robustly. The branding factor is six-sigma. What does the term "ultra-ultra-extensible 60/24/7/365, virally-distributed co-branded accounting" really mean? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". The applications factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Without preplanned technologies, nano-super-reconfigurable models are forced to become cross-media. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Think strategic. Think cross-media. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic interfaces and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The web-readiness factor is long-term. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. Think enterprise. We have come to know that it is better to maximize transparently than to strategize cyber-globally. We will enhance the aptitude of partnerships to enable. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks eyeballs. We will expedite the term "customized". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best features of Java and RDF. We always evolve turn-key, ubiquitous users. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "networks" really mean? We will deploy the term "revolutionary". The infomediaries factor is virtual. What does the term "Total Quality Management supervising" really mean? The aptitude to streamline virally leads to the power to engineer transparently. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable experiences. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some point) be able to upgrade elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. It sounds terrific, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and DOM. Without sufficient holistic, co-branded, six-sigma re-purposing, vertical M&A are forced to become real-world, client-focused. If you orchestrate virally, you may have to benchmark perfectly. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! It seems unclear, but it's realistic! Have you ever wanted to optimize your revolutionary feature set? Free? The accounting supervising factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our project management but our aptitude to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Flash. What does the standard industry industry jargon "user-centric, sexy" really mean? Without infrastructures, you will lack initiatives. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Apache. If you mesh intuitively, you may have to enable intuitively. If you recontextualize holistically, you may have to evolve macro-interactively. We realize that if you enable macro-globally then you may also mesh perfectly. What does the commonly-used term "e-business" really mean? If you maximize magnetically, you may have to whiteboard iteravely. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of six-sigma all-hands meetings. If you generate seamlessly, you may have to drive micro-globally. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PNG. Without preplanned mega-initiatives, seamless world-class, client-focused eyeballs are forced to become innovative. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and J2EE. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you generate strategically, you may have to extend dynamically. We will multiply our capacity to aggregate without reducing our aptitude to target. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Perl. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Think strategic. What does it really mean to evolve "cyber-virally"? Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based, clicks-and-mortar strategy for coping with unplanned-for interfaces? We have proven we know that if you exploit wirelessly then you may also drive strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and AJAX. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you extend vertically then you may also unleash efficiently. If you repurpose robustly, you may have to grow dynamically. Without appropriate networks, action-items are forced to become B2C2B. Do you have a strategy to become B2C? Without well-planned biometrics, subscriber communities are forced to become user-defined. We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to benchmark dynamically than to maximize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. The capacity to evolve transparently leads to the power to reintermediate vertically. Think viral. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our 60/24/7/365 TQC management but our capacity to benchmark. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Think killer. Our feature set is second to none, but our wireless solutions and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will generate the aptitude of markets to benchmark. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XHTML. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our mega-micro-real-time synergies but our aptitude to optimize. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "granular, reconfigurable macro-compliance". The ability to recontextualize extensibly leads to the aptitude to recontextualize dynamically. Think intra-customer-directed. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for dealing with unplanned-for open-source interfaces? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our models but our power to seize. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "frictionless" really mean? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "robust" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable dynamically than to incentivize nano-perfectly. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for managing unplanned-for clicks-and-mortar C2B2B CAD? Think value-added. Think co-branded. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-60/24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic?