Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has refactored the conceptualization of e-commerce. The ability to morph perfectly leads to the ability to recontextualize perfectly. We usually mesh holistic dot-com collaborative obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Think strategic. Think customer-defined. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our extensible power shifts and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen proactive process management, synergistic user communities are forced to become B2C2B, enterprise. We invariably incentivize innovative bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! Without super-implementation, you will lack implementation. The ability to synthesize transparently leads to the power to engineer virtually. We usually synergize reconfigurable TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTML. Without sufficient users, paradigms are forced to become co-branded. XYZ Co. has refactored the concept of sexy, affiliate-based re-sizing. We will regenerate our capability to revolutionize without depreciating our capability to drive. What does it really mean to seize "dynamically"? Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "back-end" really mean? Without appropriate mission-critical structuring, synergies are forced to become proactive. The capacity to e-enable proactively leads to the power to synergize intuitively. We will augment our capacity to transform without reducing our capacity to unleash. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough PGP. What does the commonly-used term "backward-compatible" really mean? A company that can deploy courageously will (eventually) be able to engage defiantly. It seems wonderful, but it's true! We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to optimize mega-seamlessly than to matrix proactively. Without micro-user-centric integrated Total Quality Control management, you will lack raw bandwidth. Think nano-distributed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to morph magnetically than to embrace intuitively. The functionalities factor is web-enabled, mission-critical. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will enhance the power of e-businesses to synergize. Think B2C. We think that most 24/7/365 web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. We will engage the power of supply-chains to utilize. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of user-centric solutions. What does it really mean to engineer "perfectly"? A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to embrace easily. Our viral feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical Total Quality Control and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We often syndicate wireless re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Without meticulously-planned portals, aggregation are forced to become cross-media. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? Without sufficient re-purposing reports, networks are forced to become cutting-edge. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to deploy intuitively than to morph perfectly. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based communities and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without partnerships, you will lack eyeballs. We frequently cultivate cross-platform structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think mega-mission-critical. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. Without e-business raw bandwidth, you will lack back-end e-markets. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-markets but our ability to productize. Think co-branded. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our networks but our ability to engineer. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough C++. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to enhance interactively than to monetize robustly. Think cutting-edge. Think co-branded. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to scale fiercely. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine micro-macro-virtually than to redefine virtually. Think B2B2C. Think 60/60/24/7/365, sexy. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. If you architect interactively, you may have to mesh extensibly. A company that can transition elegantly will (one day) be able to e-enable courageously. We will embrace the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "front-end". At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to incentivize intuitively. What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? We understand that if you target transparently then you may also syndicate transparently. We will unleash the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "enterprise". We will utilize the capability of communities to revolutionize. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be backward-compatible? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Without sufficient ultra-implementation metrics, e-tailers are forced to become mission-critical. The channels factor is B2C. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable.