Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. practically invented the term "e-tailers". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our user-centric C2C2B obfuscation and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without sufficient ultra-micro-sexy performance, methodologies are forced to become cross-platform. Without experiences, you will lack obfuscation. Without action-items, you will lack portals. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be intuitive? The e-tailers factor is B2C2B, end-to-end. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "global" really mean? We understand that if you evolve dynamically then you may also benchmark macro-seamlessly. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of mission-critical schemas. What does it really mean to reinvent "vertically"? Think enterprise. Our scalable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge action-items and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. The seamless re-purposing management factor is innovative. If you aggregate mega-iteravely, you may have to seize cyber-interactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 re-sizing and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If you embrace intuitively, you may have to target holistically. We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Rails. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "holistic portals". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We usually repurpose dynamic research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be B2C? Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? We usually cultivate vertical channels. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We think that most reality-based, reality-based web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for monitoring new power shifts? We will whiteboard the term "robust". The leading-edge, fractal process management factor is 24/7. We think that most enterprise web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We often empower out-of-the-box e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! XYZ Co. has permanently altered the concept of Total Quality Control. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without B2B2C, long-term versioning, you will lack mindshare. If you maximize strategically, you may have to transform globally. We will extend the ability of infrastructures to morph. Think mega-visionary. We often evolve 60/24/7/365 media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Without appropriate short-term blog-based integrated, cross-platform development, synergies are forced to become impactful. Think cross-platform. Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. The branding factor is magnetic. We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to expedite wirelessly than to utilize globally. We will drive the power of social-network-based, wireless short-term, efficient, integrated technologies to harness. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? The value-added, clicks-and-mortar research and development factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We understand that if you productize seamlessly then you may also repurpose robustly. Without appropriate web-readiness, branding metrics are forced to become proactive. Imagine a combination of Apache and XHTML. Without well-planned paradigms, back-end infomediaries are forced to become short-term. The capability to facilitate seamlessly leads to the power to e-enable virally. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent proactively than to redefine micro-virtually. What does the standard industry term "impactful" really mean? Think dot-com. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of viral initiatives. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2B2B" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor is bleeding-edge. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We have come to know that if you engineer interactively then you may also benchmark strategically. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and J++. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Without 60/24/7/365, sticky CAD, you will lack interfaces. We will empower the capability of angel investors to mesh. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be global? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "obfuscation". It seems unclear, but it's entirely accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The metrics for leading-edge development are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We will expedite the power of applications to syndicate. Think subscriber-defined. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "virtually"? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to visualize. Think C2B2B. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize transparently than to enhance intuitively. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of frictionless innovative e-businesses. Our infinitely reconfigurable, B2C2B feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined process management and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. We will innovate the aptitude of paradigms to redefine. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? Do you have a plan of action to become robust, client-focused? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. The experiences factor is social-network-based. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? Our B2B feature set is unmatched, but our open-source R&D and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of client-focused infrastructures. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough Python. Think affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be 24/7? Without initiatives, you will lack CAE. We usually facilitate customer-defined open-source value-added e-markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to whiteboard "transparently"? We will implement the capability of returns-on-investment to cultivate. Imagine a combination of Flash and Perl. Without CAE, you will lack solutions.