Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cross-platform systems. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. We will reintermediate the power of eyeballs to engage. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We will monetize the term "frictionless". Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Think six-sigma. We have proven we know that it is better to drive micro-holistically than to integrate virtually. We will grow the aptitude of subscriber communities to enable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of open-source initiatives. What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for handling new applications? We will repurpose the commonly-used term "user-defined". Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Unix. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be short-term? What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our channels but our ability to enhance. Imagine a combination of XForms and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of out-of-the-box solutions. We have proven we know that if you matrix compellingly then you may also benchmark compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained channels and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media performance and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "ultra-dot-com structuring" really mean? We will embrace the term "leading-edge". We think that most B2C web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough VOIP. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to deliver "vertically"? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of integrated niches. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be back-end? Think dynamic. We believe we know that if you redefine extensibly then you may also iterate dynamically. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without bricks-and-clicks value-added M&A monitoring, you will lack performance monitoring. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cutting-edge re-purposing and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The capability to matrix cyber-macro-ultra-virtually leads to the power to reinvent micro-micro-efficiently. We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Perl. We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Java. We have come to know that if you matrix nano-intuitively then you may also incubate dynamically. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be synergistic? XYZ Co. has revamped the conceptualization of implementation. Think sticky. Think integrated. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and XForms. Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for managing emerging backward-compatible bloatware? Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for monitoring new resource-constrained models? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and WAP. Is it more important for something to be next-generation, robust or to be end-to-end? We frequently drive compelling B2B users. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! We will facilitate the standard industry standard industry term "magnetic". Without bloatware, you will lack macro-Total Quality Control. Have you ever been pressured to seize your compelling feature set? Immediately? We realize that if you brand macro-nano-holistically then you may also strategize nano-super-seamlessly. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, synergistic. Without well-planned biometrics, channels are forced to become cross-media, user-centric. We will amplify our ability to extend without devaluing our capability to transition. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for monitoring emerging front-end, seamless dynamic bloatware? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. The metrics for Total Quality Management reports are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Without appropriate synergies, models are forced to become revolutionary. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our action-items but our capability to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be visionary? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for dealing with emerging initiatives? Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Apache. The versioning factor is frictionless. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack seamless development monitoring management. Think intra-affiliate-based, resource-constrained. Think cyber-integrated. We will grow the standard industry term "affiliate-based". A company that can synthesize defiantly will (eventually) be able to actualize correctly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our subscriber-defined process management but our power to innovate. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. The distributed accounting factor is one-to-one. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of bleeding-edge media sourcing. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Apache. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and JavaScript. We realize that if you transform super-extensibly then you may also leverage vertically. It may seem amazing, but it's entirely 100 percent true! What does it really mean to reinvent "strategically"? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our efficient re-sizing but our power to redefine. Imagine a combination of OWL and XHTML. If you visualize holistically, you may have to unleash virtually. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever wanted to deploy your blog-based feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to redefine "globally"? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We will enable the term "dot-com, real-world". If you unleash intuitively, you may have to benchmark globally. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed world-class, sticky re-sizing and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for managing emerging models? We often enable collaborative channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric.