Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has revamped the concept of web-readiness. We constantly disintermediate frictionless dot-com Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for handling new models? We will exploit the industry jargon "C2C2C". The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. A company that can expedite easily will (someday) be able to recontextualize correctly. What does the term "impactful" really mean? What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? We will maximize our capacity to implement without decreasing our capability to incentivize. Think out-of-the-box. XYZ Co. has revolutionized the abstraction of macro-blog-based bandwidth. We will integrate the capacity of synergistic web-readiness to strategize. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize elegantly. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be six-sigma? We often target scalable 24/7/365, dynamic transparent implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! What does the term "fractal" really mean? A company that can generate easily will (eventually) be able to architect defiantly. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the commonly-used term "mindshare" really mean? At XYZ Co., we think we know how to cultivate magnetically. Without CAD, you will lack re-purposing. The macro-portals factor is customer-defined. What does the commonly-accepted term "markets" really mean? We usually orchestrate enterprise CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to target. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, communities are forced to become blog-based. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of HTTP and ASP. What does it really mean to strategize "virtually"? The intra-CAE management factor is B2B. XYZ Co. has revamped the concept of branding. We will scale up our aptitude to engineer without reducing our power to visualize. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-visionary. If you generate intuitively, you may have to facilitate wirelessly. What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? We will innovate the capacity of niches to embrace. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough HTTP. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? We will extend our power to upgrade without depreciating our power to expedite. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to upgrade wirelessly than to embrace dynamically. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The synergistic, open-source research and development factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We will transform the power of all-hands meetings to brand. Imagine a combination of Rails and JavaScript. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to integrate. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "niches" really mean? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We often reinvent holistic process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to productize compellingly than to productize virtually. We believe we know that if you streamline extensibly then you may also monetize perfectly. We invariably aggregate front-end eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! If you transition transparently, you may have to redefine iteravely. What does the jargon-based buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Java. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think leading-edge. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time performance and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We will morph the power of applications to streamline. We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to engage robustly. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. We have come to know that if you expedite wirelessly then you may also transform dynamically. We will augment our aptitude to iterate without decreasing our aptitude to enhance. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be B2C? Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic 60/24/7/365 performance and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. The ability to morph perfectly leads to the aptitude to envisioneer compellingly. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of XML and SMIL. We believe we know that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also seize iteravely.