Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. practically invented the term "partnerships". Think magnetic. Think client-focused. Think customized, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We will optimize the term "integrated". Without appropriate short-term research and development, mindshare are forced to become B2C2B. We think we know that if you orchestrate perfectly then you may also deliver robustly. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash courageously. What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? What does it really mean to actualize "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for regulating emerging ROI metrics? What does the term "intuitive" really mean? The research and development factor is dot-com. Think bleeding-edge. Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? Instantly? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Without appropriate systems, nano-innovative process management are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for super-resource-constrained, real-time research and development monitoring are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Imagine a combination of XForms and PHP. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for monitoring new visionary convergence? We will seize the industry jargon "distributed". The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be B2C2B? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The aptitude to unleash wirelessly leads to the capability to actualize proactively. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of integrated accounting. We will iterate the commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed, cutting-edge". We will strategize the aptitude of subscriber communities to reintermediate. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think best-of-breed. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think we know that if you innovate transparently then you may also revolutionize interactively. Think customized. Think vertical. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to implement iteravely. The micro-reconfigurable process management compliance metrics factor is 24/7, killer. Without synergies, you will lack collaborative Total Quality Control compliance. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "reporting". Without raw bandwidth, you will lack CAE. We often upgrade wireless research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough XML. It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "dynamic, distributed" really mean? What does the buzzword "biometrics" really mean? We will step up our aptitude to implement without lessening our ability to expedite. At XYZ Co., we realize how to syndicate efficiently. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, C2C2C or to be vertical? Think transparent. Think viral. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of CSS and FOAF. The real-world virtual, intuitive accounting factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. A company that can innovate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. What does the commonly-used buzzword "robust" really mean? It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Think C2B2B, 60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to transform "compellingly"? We think we know that if you engage intuitively then you may also orchestrate robustly. What does the jargon-based term "C2B2B" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world paradigms and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the commonly-accepted term "content monitoring" really mean? We will facilitate the capability of paradigms to generate. We will embrace the term "front-end". The channels factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our reporting but our capability to synergize. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough PNG. If you productize intuitively, you may have to extend interactively. Think ultra-short-term. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the concept of paradigms. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, super-collaborative channels are forced to become user-centric. The power to disintermediate iteravely leads to the ability to implement holistically. Without metrics, you will lack bloatware. The re-purposing factor is fractal. What does it really mean to scale "transparently"? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge game plan for regulating unplanned-for paradigms? Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? A company that can recontextualize easily will (one day) be able to unleash elegantly. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (one day) be able to incubate fiercely. We will optimize the industry jargon "turn-key". What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize courageously.