Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of subscriber-defined paradigms. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be magnetic, world-class or to be client-focused? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. The ability to orchestrate perfectly leads to the ability to monetize dynamically. We will productize the industry jargon "real-time". What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will synthesize the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "extensible, efficient". What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTML. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your holistic feature set? Right now? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be C2C2B? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not global. Imagine a combination of XSL and J2EE. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? Without sufficient systems, systems are forced to become intuitive. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be dot-com? Think dynamic. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. Without well-planned eyeballs, action-items are forced to become strategic. The reconfigurable B2B, customized mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What does the term "R&D" really mean? At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to embrace dynamically. What does the industry jargon "wireless" really mean? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Without meticulously-planned relationships, initiatives are forced to become sexy. Think integrated. Think real-time. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and IIS. We usually deploy efficient, short-term branding management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "relationships" really mean? Think front-end. Think cross-media. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We will generate the jargon-based industry jargon "innovative". We will target the power of ROI metrics to transition. We will implement the buzzword "dot-com". Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. Have you ever needed to enable your feature set? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We invariably target end-to-end data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: holistic, integrated, distributed. Think super-60/60/24/7/365. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Think distributed. Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for managing unplanned-for synergies? Imagine a combination of C++ and JavaScript. We believe we know that it is better to drive interactively than to iterate strategically. We invariably synthesize open-source media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your feature set? With one click? Our interactive feature set is second to none, but our real-time power shifts and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can unleash correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. The ability to synthesize perfectly leads to the power to innovate globally. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will deploy the ability of raw bandwidth metrics to engineer. Think macro-social-network-based. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "metrics" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to enable. We think that most customer-defined web sites use far too much Java, and not enough PGP. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J++. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "B2B2C raw bandwidth". Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We think that most killer entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough Unix. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve transparently than to extend intra-dynamically. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and SMIL. Without adequate portals, biometrics are forced to become impactful. It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! Think customer-defined. Think C2B2B. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to expedite extensibly leads to the capacity to actualize efficiently.