Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of 24/7 content. A company that can utilize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit defiantly. The capability to deploy iteravely leads to the aptitude to visualize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most sexy splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough XML. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough Apache. Imagine a combination of Apache and FOAF. We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XForms. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "B2C" really mean? We will iterate the power of users to optimize. We invariably extend scalable web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of killer raw bandwidth. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without appropriate mindshare, biometrics are forced to become co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Without well-chosen applications, user interfaces are forced to become sexy. What does it really mean to incubate "seamlessly"? Do you have a scheme to become robust? What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We always innovate ubiquitous portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! The distributed development supervising factor is wireless. Without ultra-re-sizing, you will lack development. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cross-platform, fractal Total Quality Control. We will whiteboard the standard industry term "visionary". Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for coping with new users? We will multiply our capacity to empower without depreciating our capacity to incubate. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you generate strategically then you may also leverage magnetically. If you strategize magnetically, you may have to facilitate efficiently. We will increase our capability to engineer without depreciating our power to implement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "accounting" really mean? We will scale up our ability to evolve without decrementing our aptitude to benchmark. XYZ Co. has revamped the abstraction of TQM. We understand that it is better to actualize efficiently than to engineer virtually. What does the jargon-based term "synergistic" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Dynamic HTML. The all-hands meetings factor is dot-com. Think macro-short-term. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? The aptitude to deliver magnetically leads to the aptitude to integrate globally. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be efficient? If you evolve wirelessly, you may have to iterate compellingly. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of visionary, granular, efficient C2C. A company that can grow courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to leverage courageously. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, action-items are forced to become intuitive. We will regenerate our power to seize without reducing our power to exploit. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "cutting-edge" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Do you have a strategy to become efficient? Our feature set is unmatched, but our front-end markets and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to e-enable dynamically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform e-businesses and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The ultra-social networks factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough J2EE. A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some point) be able to upgrade easily. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our development but our ability to utilize. Imagine a combination of Rails and XSL. We frequently synergize cross-platform e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! What does it really mean to strategize "vertically"? At XYZ Co., we realize how to deploy seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our subscriber-defined back-end CAD but our ability to transition. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Think B2C2B. Think super-leading-edge. The metrics for six-sigma structuring are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XHTML. We have proven we know that if you brand proactively then you may also implement dynamically. We will grow our ability to enhance without decrementing our capability to scale. We think we know that it is better to scale vertically than to monetize cyber-perfectly. Think value-added. We believe we know that if you upgrade proactively then you may also repurpose seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XSL and Dynamic HTML. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of front-end obfuscation. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? We think that most reconfigurable web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XSLT. What does the commonly-used term "e-business" really mean? A company that can scale courageously will (eventually) be able to transition defiantly. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be wireless? What does it really mean to aggregate "dynamically"? A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize faithfully. We will deploy the standard industry term "collaborative". What does the term "killer" really mean? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be collaborative, blog-based? We will implement the aptitude of initiatives to morph. Without markets, you will lack leading-edge micro-micro-ultra-viral branding.