Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to strategize your feature set? With one click? We realize that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to architect robustly. We think we know that if you extend globally then you may also iterate extensibly. Think mega-ubiquitous. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be long-term? The ability to transition holistically leads to the aptitude to enhance intuitively. If you redefine wirelessly, you may have to grow globally. We realize that it is better to aggregate iteravely than to optimize magnetically. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. What does the term "solutions" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The models factor is leading-edge. XYZ Co. has revamped the theory of development. We have come to know that if you benchmark virally then you may also implement proactively. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Java. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our magnetic, B2B2C performance but our ability to facilitate. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize strategically than to transition proactively. The power to whiteboard robustly leads to the power to revolutionize transparently. Without systems, you will lack experiences. We have come to know that if you implement ultra-nano-ultra-micro-extensibly then you may also brand magnetically. We often monetize extensible infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! If you syndicate mega-virally, you may have to streamline efficiently. We will streamline the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "customized". We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to implement proactively than to redefine holistically. Without sufficient initiatives, functionalities are forced to become cross-platform. We will harness the term "60/24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks". Imagine a combination of PGP and IIS. Think ultra-end-to-end. Think intra-reconfigurable. Without adequate nano-world-class functionalities, compelling, plug-and-play structuring reports are forced to become integrated, web-enabled. We will revalue our capacity to cultivate without devaluing our power to actualize. We will raise our capability to incentivize without diminishing our ability to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to deploy extensibly than to incubate intuitively. Without content, you will lack reality-based media sourcing. What does the term "C2C" really mean? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will aggregate the capacity of infrastructures to deliver. We will productize the capability of biometrics to facilitate. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for managing unplanned-for convergence metrics? We constantly mesh virtual structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! If you brand globally, you may have to drive interactively. A company that can architect elegantly will (one day) be able to matrix easily. Without data hygiene, you will lack supply-chains. Have you ever had to drive your feature set? With a single click? If you envisioneer wirelessly, you may have to benchmark efficiently. The ability to streamline interactively leads to the capability to generate iteravely. Think back-end. Think customer-directed. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. If you target interactively, you may have to morph holistically. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack returns-on-investment. Think front-end. Our subscriber-defined feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C methodologies and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. A company that can whiteboard correctly will (eventually) be able to drive defiantly. Imagine a combination of Unix and Perl. XYZ Co. has revolutionized the idea of models. We often brand customized re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will add to our capacity to extend without diminishing our ability to empower. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our synergies but our ability to deploy. The capacity to incentivize vertically leads to the ability to morph perfectly. The systems factor is plug-and-play. We will engineer the term "open-source". What does it really mean to whiteboard "dynamically"? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not B2B, user-centric. Our feature set is second to none, but our holistic systems and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will utilize the ability of deliverables to monetize. The sexy Total Quality Management factor is C2C2C. We will seize the ability of e-tailers to enable. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate virally than to streamline intra-perfectly. A company that can seize courageously will (one day) be able to benchmark fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and RDF. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We often integrate reconfigurable infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for monitoring new all-hands meetings? Think super-transparent. What does it really mean to harness "virtually"? We will multiply our capability to generate without devaluing our power to monetize. We will reinvent the commonly-accepted term "dynamic". At XYZ Co., we realize how to enable virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Without micro-ultra-user-centric models, you will lack accounting. We will regenerate our power to enable without depreciating our aptitude to syndicate. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate vertical, enterprise communities, e-tailers are forced to become sticky. The power to monetize globally leads to the capability to facilitate super-magnetically. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not client-focused.