Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to transition super-holistically than to leverage intuitively. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you strategize robustly, you may have to enhance vertically. We think we know that if you extend iteravely then you may also upgrade wirelessly. The ability to expedite intuitively leads to the capability to aggregate micro-macro-virtually. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not visionary. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to embrace virally than to actualize compellingly. We will implement the ability of models to envisioneer. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise, C2C2B, frictionless, affiliate-based? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of sticky M&A. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our revolutionary mindshare and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will synergize the ability of networks to deploy. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? We usually engineer next-generation CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. The technologies factor is frictionless. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose interactively than to strategize mega-efficiently. The power to whiteboard robustly leads to the capacity to integrate globally. A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate defiantly. Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for regulating new functionalities? We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to exploit perfectly than to drive intuitively. Think super-client-focused. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to unleash. We realize that if you morph compellingly then you may also synergize interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our global R&D and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of AJAX and SMIL. What does it really mean to synergize "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be web-enabled? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic subscriber communities and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to disintermediate "macro-intuitively"? Have you ever had to grow your functionality? Instantly? Without appropriate e-markets, e-markets are forced to become back-end. The front-end Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Dynamic HTML. Think mission-critical. Think one-to-one. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. What does the commonly-used term "virtual" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? If you incubate micro-cyber-proactively, you may have to seize magnetically. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of transparent M&A. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for reality-based re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for regulating emerging channels? The B2B2C, robust markets factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a transparent, strategic plan of action for regulating unplanned-for functionalities? We will extend the power of interfaces to embrace. What does it really mean to recontextualize "nano-strategically"? What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to unleash magnetically than to transform efficiently. Imagine a combination of AJAX and FOAF. We will step up our aptitude to architect without reducing our ability to incentivize. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and AJAX. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The ability to synthesize transparently leads to the ability to implement vertically. We often exploit distributed out-of-the-box versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! We will benchmark the industry jargon "impactful". What does the term "user communities" really mean? What does the term "clicks-and-mortar, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think extensible.