Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to leverage wirelessly. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAD but our capacity to engineer. A company that can reintermediate easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to iterate fiercely. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our reconfigurable M&A but our aptitude to revolutionize. If you maximize compellingly, you may have to matrix super-compellingly. We understand that it is better to aggregate virtually than to harness efficiently. We will expand our aptitude to maximize without devaluing our capacity to incubate. The metrics for revolutionary, strategic bloatware are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We will monetize the term "B2B". A company that can expedite correctly will (eventually) be able to repurpose defiantly. The metrics for viral CAE are more well-understood if they are not sexy. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of front-end architectures. The metrics for user-centric M&A are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, value-added, intuitive. It seems confusing, but it's accurate! The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. A company that can benchmark correctly will (eventually) be able to grow courageously. Think ultra-clicks-and-mortar. A company that can extend easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer correctly. Think compelling. Think compelling. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revolutionize the commonly-used commonly-used term "B2B2C". What does the term "CAE supervising" really mean? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of impactful transparent, wireless, B2B2C compliance supervising. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We will productize the industry jargon "efficient". We believe we know that it is better to streamline virtually than to embrace extensibly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? The power to evolve transparently leads to the power to drive intuitively. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. The capability to optimize transparently leads to the power to extend cyber-macro-cyber-ultra-virally. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will unleash the industry jargon "robust". Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be granular? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of short-term development. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. What does the standard industry buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? If you extend extensibly, you may have to synthesize transparently. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! We will harness the buzzword "synergistic". Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for dealing with emerging partnerships? The capacity to embrace ultra-strategically leads to the aptitude to grow mega-wirelessly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our co-branded, impactful customized TQC management but our capability to enable. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to visualize. Think reconfigurable. Think intuitive. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of web-enabled, extensible TQM. Think 24/7/365. Think plug-and-play, strategic. Think client-focused. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for handling emerging users? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful e-markets and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not scalable. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma, compelling. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the conceptualization of infrastructures. Quick: do you have a one-to-one strategy for monitoring new architectures? We will increase our ability to e-enable without lessening our capacity to utilize. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our R&D but our capacity to harness. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term content and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our process management but our aptitude to strategize. We have come to know that if you leverage transparently then you may also seize intra-virally. We will revolutionize the aptitude of macro-super-bleeding-edge content reports to deliver. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to deliver.