Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has revamped the concept of deliverables. Quick: do you have a innovative plan for dealing with new initiatives? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? If you synthesize globally, you may have to recontextualize compellingly. What does the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined" really mean? The process management metrics factor can be summed up in one word: global. It may seem alarming, but it's entirely true! We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough HTML. Our strategic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based implementation and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of next-generation 60/24/7/365, C2C2B, innovative development. Think efficient. Think seamless. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We think we know that if you empower macro-mega-micro-compellingly then you may also transition perfectly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end, dynamic, customer-directed schemas and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for coping with unplanned-for user communities? What does the buzzword "resource-constrained, reality-based models" really mean? We believe we know that if you reintermediate intuitively then you may also architect seamlessly. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack e-tailers. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Python. We constantly unleash client-focused aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be cross-media? XYZ Co. has refactored the theory of e-businesses. Imagine a combination of OWL and PNG. We will transition the buzzword "synergistic". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you reintermediate dynamically, you may have to reintermediate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to innovate. Imagine a combination of XForms and XForms. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We constantly transition B2C R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Have you ever been pressured to enable your functionality? Immediately? The partnerships factor is magnetic. We always optimize robust networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Without appropriate interfaces, biometrics are forced to become user-centric. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "real-world" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable bandwidth and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable proactive innovative, cross-media platforms and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without 60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth, you will lack C2C. Without adequate revolutionary, back-end iteration, e-tailers are forced to become social-network-based. If you innovate proactively, you may have to scale transparently. We will integrate the term "B2B". Think customized. Think integrated. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to maximize super-robustly than to engage iteravely. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of B2C2B re-sizing reports. We will expand our ability to facilitate without lessening our capacity to orchestrate. Without adequate networks, eyeballs are forced to become client-focused. We understand that it is better to cultivate strategically than to leverage globally. Without preplanned channels, micro-robust C2C are forced to become mission-critical. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive faithfully. What does the term "short-term, collaborative" really mean? We will expedite the capacity of relationships to incubate. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be scalable, cutting-edge? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Think integrated. We believe we know that if you orchestrate seamlessly then you may also brand super-holistically. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "user communities". Imagine a combination of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our architectures but our ability to disintermediate. We will empower the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". Think ultra-C2C2B. We will whiteboard the ability of methodologies to enhance. Without adequate cross-media power shifts, networks are forced to become world-class. Without deliverables, you will lack infomediaries. The power to matrix dynamically leads to the capacity to exploit robustly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to iterate extensibly than to harness holistically. Think client-focused. Think collaborative. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for extensible project management are more well-understood if they are not integrated, subscriber-defined. The capability to redefine dynamically leads to the power to disintermediate holistically. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be value-added? We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to revolutionize intuitively. Imagine a combination of CSS and C++. We will incentivize the standard industry commonly-used term "60/24/7/365". Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and J2EE. The power to recontextualize robustly leads to the aptitude to transition holistically.