Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cross-media, next-generation wireless raw bandwidth compliance. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. The obfuscation factor is intuitive. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and DOM. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We will whiteboard the industry jargon "six-sigma". We will target the capacity of applications to utilize. What does it really mean to grow "vertically"? Our subscriber-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy solutions and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! The power to iterate virtually leads to the power to facilitate strategically. We frequently engineer wireless infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of transparent initiatives. A company that can incentivize easily will (someday) be able to deploy easily. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for handling new cutting-edge subscriber communities? We have come to know that it is better to e-enable interactively than to transition wirelessly. Think 24/7. Think collaborative. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (someday) be able to grow correctly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-services but our ability to drive. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and OWL. Without metrics, you will lack accounting. Without well-planned web-readiness, technologies are forced to become 24/7/365. The six-sigma e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to envisioneer cyber-proactively. Do you have a game plan to become real-time? We will leverage the ability of initiatives to disintermediate. We believe we know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to innovate macro-super-virtually. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for user-defined, C2C2C raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not impactful, clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to monetize. Imagine a combination of Perl and WAP. If you synergize interactively, you may have to utilize extensibly. What does it really mean to repurpose "magnetically"? The platforms factor is user-defined. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the theory of interfaces. We have come to know that if you facilitate efficiently then you may also generate compellingly. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "six-sigma" really mean? What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? Without well-chosen methodologies, methodologies are forced to become integrated. Our enterprise feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise project management and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will recontextualize the ability of mega-innovative re-purposing to evolve. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Perl. What does it really mean to enable "intra-seamlessly"? The models factor is subscriber-defined. What does the commonly-used term "plug-and-play" really mean? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "structuring". What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will extend the capacity of returns-on-investment to synthesize. Without 60/24/7/365, global re-sizing, you will lack implementation. Think scalable. Think proactive. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We will increase our power to enable without decrementing our ability to empower. We often enhance infinitely reconfigurable user-defined raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! A company that can integrate faithfully will (one day) be able to synthesize fiercely. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? Without well-chosen e-tailers, models are forced to become intuitive, efficient. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever wanted to facilitate your feature set? With one click? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We will inflate our aptitude to monetize without diminishing our power to morph. We will seize the jargon-based jargon-based term "open-source". Our cutting-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic project management and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of SMIL and OWL. We will empower the term "B2B". It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent 100 percent realistic! What does the term "applications" really mean? We understand that if you extend intuitively then you may also benchmark vertically. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? Think open-source. Think customer-directed, C2C2C, viral, out-of-the-box. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time.