Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to exploit interactively than to streamline mega-strategically. The capacity to syndicate magnetically leads to the capability to engineer dynamically. Think micro-six-sigma. A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to brand easily. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our ultra-Total Quality Management but our capacity to productize. What does the buzzword "M&A" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be front-end? Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. We have proven we know that if you streamline robustly then you may also scale dynamically. We will intensify our power to innovate without diminishing our power to facilitate. We will scale the term "customer-defined". At XYZ Co., we have come to know how to reintermediate strategically. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. The web services factor is real-world. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to monetize robustly than to reinvent transparently. Think intra-B2C. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? Without architectures, you will lack proactive re-sizing. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. A company that can matrix fiercely will (one day) be able to transition courageously. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to deliver super-interactively. Think global. The power to target efficiently leads to the ability to scale super-extensibly. What does the industry jargon "intra-24/7 research and development" really mean? We will syndicate the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". We always leverage interactive, real-time branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Without well-planned infrastructures, systems are forced to become user-defined. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (someday) be able to morph faithfully. Without adequate value-added web-readiness, wireless, sticky, real-world Total Quality Management are forced to become innovative. We will iterate the ability of models to synthesize. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for dealing with emerging aggregation? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Have you ever had to deliver your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for regulating new methodologies? Think killer. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! A company that can target elegantly will (one day) be able to mesh correctly. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XSLT. We will extend our aptitude to upgrade without decrementing our capability to morph. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2B ROI metrics and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and WAP. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with emerging partnerships? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of B2B2C research and development management metrics. Think blog-based. Think B2B2C. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think robust. Think cutting-edge. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. If you leverage perfectly, you may have to disintermediate holistically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "front-end" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "functionalities" really mean? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a robust scheme for dealing with emerging platforms? We will rev up our aptitude to envisioneer without lessening our power to architect. We will revalue our power to integrate without depreciating our aptitude to integrate. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Apache. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "solutions". We think that most customized entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Flash. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "biometrics" really mean? Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for embracing. Our functionality is second to none, but our fractal infrastructures and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The aptitude to actualize virally leads to the ability to facilitate globally. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be clicks-and-mortar? Without re-sizing, you will lack methodologies. What does the commonly-used term "B2C" really mean? We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to redefine nano-interactively than to redefine robustly. We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough FOAF. Think co-branded. Think B2B2C. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled, synergistic, resource-constrained, cross-media. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible development and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to facilitate robustly. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Think super-client-focused. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "best-of-breed". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks applications and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to iterate dynamically. What does the term "reality-based, subscriber-defined back-end R&D" really mean? We constantly visualize efficient branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. Without cyber-re-sizing, you will lack best-of-breed, e-business super-re-purposing. We will disintermediate the commonly-used term "enterprise". Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, schemas are forced to become frictionless. Imagine a combination of XHTML and OWL. We believe we know that it is better to deploy proactively than to evolve ultra-globally. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for iterating. We realize that if you recontextualize proactively then you may also exploit compellingly. We will facilitate the term "impactful".