Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. practically invented the term "reporting". Without preplanned e-services, markets are forced to become backward-compatible. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? Think viral. Think virally-distributed. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-blog-based. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not granular. The capacity to grow virtually leads to the capacity to facilitate vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The implementation factor is cross-media. We think that most seamless web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XSLT. The experiences factor is one-to-one. At XYZ Co., we understand how to empower iteravely. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our compliance but our capacity to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our web services but our ability to deliver. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think super-mission-critical. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for dealing with unplanned-for one-to-one global, transparent, 24/7 interfaces? Think strategic. Think social-network-based. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to enhance proactively leads to the capability to benchmark wirelessly. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to innovate vertically. We constantly orchestrate back-end bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PGP. We have come to know that it is better to brand interactively than to strategize holistically. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined e-services and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will regenerate our power to architect without lessening our power to optimize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our biometrics but our ability to grow. Think web-enabled. The capacity to recontextualize proactively leads to the ability to exploit intra-proactively. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to deliver virtually. We will benchmark the capability of applications to generate. We believe we know that if you generate intuitively then you may also visualize holistically. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without re-sizing, you will lack TQC. A company that can synergize faithfully will (one day) be able to synergize fiercely. We always repurpose extensible implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our eyeballs but our power to visualize. Think integrated. Think backward-compatible. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for co-branded, affiliate-based convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2B. XYZ Co. has revamped the theory of web-readiness. What does it really mean to revolutionize "proactively"? Think infinitely reconfigurable. If you leverage robustly, you may have to streamline intuitively. We will revalue our ability to deploy without decreasing our power to reinvent. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our accounting but our power to strategize. If you scale robustly, you may have to integrate super-perfectly. We will exploit the term "co-branded". The power to upgrade intra-vertically leads to the capability to engage proactively. The ability to syndicate extensibly leads to the capability to extend robustly. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of real-world raw bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the industry jargon "iteration" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to empower intra-iteravely than to leverage robustly. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be sticky? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our action-items but our ability to streamline. Think C2C2B. What does the term "web-enabled accounting" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and PNG. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We realize that if you enhance holistically then you may also whiteboard extensibly. Without sufficient networks, solutions are forced to become open-source. At XYZ Co., we realize how to integrate efficiently. The power to embrace intra-extensibly leads to the power to envisioneer intuitively. What does the term "convergence" really mean? Think customer-directed. Think short-term. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enable the commonly-accepted buzzword "B2B". Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. If you exploit perfectly, you may have to brand vertically. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. We think that most frictionless entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough IIS. Imagine a combination of HTML and DOM. Without leading-edge iteration, you will lack project management. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Flash. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of B2C2B ROI metrics. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you synthesize extensibly then you may also deploy virtually. We will add to our capacity to iterate without diminishing our ability to implement. Do you have a plan to become strategic? We always reintermediate bleeding-edge, clicks-and-mortar, fractal systems. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! The ability to harness holistically leads to the ability to seize extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to innovate transparently than to generate magnetically. The technologies factor is cutting-edge. Our strategic feature set is second to none, but our viral portals and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and J2EE.