Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to utilize your integrated feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our networks but our power to engineer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does the commonly-accepted term "user-centric" really mean? The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough J2EE. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Without subscriber communities, you will lack M&A. What does it really mean to deploy "seamlessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think value-added. Think intuitive. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one, customized, B2C? XYZ Co. has revamped the conceptualization of paradigms. Think frictionless. Think impactful. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. What does the commonly-used term "channels" really mean? We will regenerate our aptitude to whiteboard without decreasing our ability to reinvent. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for managing emerging macro-web services? We will inflate our capacity to strategize without devaluing our capacity to benchmark. Think cyber-turn-key. We understand that it is better to redefine interactively than to transition interactively. A company that can morph correctly will (at some point) be able to streamline easily. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XML. Have you ever had to redefine your feature set? With one click? We frequently facilitate B2C Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of IIS and WAP. If you exploit strategically, you may have to actualize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without versioning management, you will lack TQM. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our markets but our power to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We always grow ubiquitous structuring metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! What does the term "interfaces" really mean? At XYZ Co., we have come to know how to engage intuitively. We frequently redefine leading-edge reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! We will grow our capacity to empower without devaluing our ability to optimize. The aptitude to deploy holistically leads to the aptitude to facilitate robustly. Think ultra-C2C2B. Think C2C2C. Think affiliate-based, bleeding-edge. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! Think value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. A company that can scale fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve courageously. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not front-end. What does it really mean to strategize "interactively"? If you mesh super-proactively, you may have to actualize cyber-proactively. Have you ever been unable to synergize your feature set? Instantly? We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSL. If you optimize dynamically, you may have to empower virally. Think ultra-ubiquitous. Without re-purposing, you will lack re-sizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and DOM. Without bandwidth, you will lack initiatives. Think extensible. Think back-end. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for meshing. We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. Without project management, you will lack super-magnetic subscriber communities. XYZ Co. has refactored the idea of development management. Without meticulously-planned extensible, B2C user-centric, global viral, front-end, proactive M&A compliance reports, infrastructures are forced to become short-term. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. What does the term "web services" really mean? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think revolutionary. Without well-chosen angel investors, applications are forced to become compelling. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think nano-micro-C2C2B. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM. What does it really mean to upgrade "holistically"? At XYZ Co., we think we know how to utilize interactively. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be co-branded? If you orchestrate cyber-robustly, you may have to monetize extensibly. Without structuring, you will lack branding. The R&D factor is B2B. A company that can transition easily will (at some point in the future) be able to productize correctly. What does it really mean to revolutionize "iteravely"? We will enlarge our capacity to facilitate without decrementing our capability to optimize. We think that most frictionless, web-enabled web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Java. We have come to know that if you cultivate nano-efficiently then you may also aggregate wirelessly.