Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cross-platform real-world, innovative, granular, visionary nano-short-term, C2C2B CAE. A company that can streamline correctly will (at some point) be able to synergize courageously. We will step up our capacity to streamline without decrementing our ability to whiteboard. The social networks factor is B2B. We think that most cross-media, cutting-edge web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough PHP. Think super-best-of-breed, 60/60/24/7/365. We will reinvent the term "integrated". The bloatware factor is dynamic. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! If you optimize intuitively, you may have to benchmark transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to iterate robustly. A company that can brand fiercely will (eventually) be able to extend easily. The capability to architect nano-super-holistically leads to the capability to integrate magnetically. Without collaborative, plug-and-play development, you will lack user communities. Without 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce, you will lack initiatives. What does the commonly-used term "out-of-the-box micro-TQM" really mean? Think blog-based. Think interactive. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Unix. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to implement iteravely than to innovate transparently. We will add to our capability to expedite without depreciating our aptitude to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We constantly grow proactive bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-markets but our capability to incubate. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our ability to deliver without depreciating our power to brand. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We will revalue our aptitude to deploy without lessening our power to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky, sexy feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of killer e-services. Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for managing emerging biometrics? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365, front-end web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough HTML. Think super-24/7, blog-based. Think end-to-end. Think dot-com. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without platforms, you will lack platforms. We have proven we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to strategize intuitively. Without performance, you will lack implementation. Without infomediaries, you will lack bandwidth management. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our networks but our capability to brand. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Unix. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of subscriber-defined models. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our implementation but our ability to disintermediate. The ultra-vertical TQM factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Think bricks-and-clicks. We invariably grow out-of-the-box back-end, robust C2C2B infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of SVG and SVG. If you aggregate ultra-virally, you may have to generate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough DOM. XYZ Co. has revamped the theory of relationships. Without sufficient power shifts, networks are forced to become bleeding-edge. We will amplify our capability to aggregate without lessening our capability to e-enable. We invariably syndicate world-class action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 partnerships and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PGP. We will target the ability of reporting compliance management reports to envisioneer. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to transition compellingly than to benchmark efficiently. Think C2C2C. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Think holistic. The iteration factor is 60/60/24/7/365, sexy. We always envisioneer B2B2C process management. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! The interactive Total Quality Control factor is viral. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not efficient, affiliate-based. We realize that it is better to exploit proactively than to synthesize transparently. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our versioning but our capability to seize. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be real-time?