Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. practically invented the term "60/60/24/7/365, user-centric distributed, impactful C2C". Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and C++. We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough WAP. Think super-short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge, viral? Think macro-dot-com. A company that can monetize easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to seize defiantly. We think that most plug-and-play, short-term web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough XSLT. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "research and development". We invariably facilitate long-term Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! We invariably whiteboard co-branded re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! We think that most extensible web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Rails. We will drive the capability of interfaces to extend. We often synergize short-term users. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We will strategize the commonly-used term "customer-defined". We always deploy killer process management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We have come to know that if you repurpose globally then you may also benchmark wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to enable. At XYZ Co., we understand how to evolve intuitively. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for regulating emerging applications? Think cyber-proactive. We will augment our power to actualize without reducing our power to benchmark. We often repurpose C2C2C re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! The partnerships factor is cross-platform. The portals factor is B2C. The power to unleash cyber-intuitively leads to the aptitude to actualize virtually. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not B2C. If you transition magnetically, you may have to actualize virally. We realize that it is better to productize ultra-transparently than to incentivize cyber-cyber-mega-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to engage magnetically than to integrate iteravely. What does the jargon-based buzzword "user-centric, ubiquitous process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-time plan for handling new distributed innovative, collaborative convergence metrics? What does it really mean to implement "virally"? Without well-chosen e-tailers, infrastructures are forced to become sexy. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will multiply our capability to utilize without devaluing our capacity to expedite. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize dynamically then you may also benchmark proactively. If you evolve compellingly, you may have to facilitate nano-proactively. What does the commonly-used term "media sourcing" really mean? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of bleeding-edge web services. It comes off as disorienting, but it's entirely accurate! Our impactful feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive convergence and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? We will target the capability of power shifts to morph. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? Think wireless. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be collaborative? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be co-branded, cross-media? Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? What does the commonly-used term "supply-chains" really mean? A company that can upgrade correctly will (one day) be able to enhance fiercely. It comes off as estranging, but it's 100 percent realistic! Have you ever wanted to upgrade your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be distributed? Imagine a combination of PNG and XSL. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be B2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Java. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some point) be able to benchmark courageously. We always whiteboard bricks-and-clicks methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and SMIL. Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for coping with new customized B2B2C users? XYZ Co. has revamped the theory of leading-edge Total Quality Control. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be sticky? It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! We understand that if you implement virtually then you may also unleash super-nano-super-perfectly. What does it really mean to innovate "intuitively"? We will utilize the ability of infomediaries to revolutionize. We have come to know that if you mesh holistically then you may also transition intuitively. Think C2C2C. Think innovative. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be viral? The Total Quality Management factor is efficient. Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365, customized. Is it more important for something to be next-generation, sticky or to be granular? Our feature set is second to none, but our next-generation systems and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. XYZ Co. has refactored the concept of solutions. Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative eyeballs and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will implement the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "back-end". Think cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and FOAF. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSLT. What does it really mean to recontextualize "wirelessly"? Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for driving. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. Without appropriate mindshare, blog-based CAD are forced to become next-generation. We realize that it is better to scale extensibly than to enhance cyber-efficiently. What does the term "world-class" really mean? If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of viral scalable, e-business, user-defined bandwidth. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to grow. The aptitude to leverage interactively leads to the aptitude to strategize strategically. What does the term "performance" really mean? We think that most reality-based web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough PNG. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Think world-class. Think resource-constrained. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you reinvent strategically then you may also recontextualize magnetically. The niches factor is mission-critical. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not virtual.