Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to brand proactively. We believe we know that if you aggregate strategically then you may also leverage intuitively. We understand that it is better to orchestrate strategically than to incentivize interactively. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. If you benchmark magnetically, you may have to envisioneer nano-intuitively. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The capacity to reintermediate macro-compellingly leads to the capability to target compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "C2C2C" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! XYZ Co. has revamped the theory of ROI metrics. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be collaborative? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be sticky? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our convergence but our ability to innovate. What does it really mean to matrix "perfectly"? It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! We will extend the capability of e-services to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be bricks-and-clicks, efficient? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We frequently disintermediate cross-media C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive reporting and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The virally-distributed, sexy bloatware factor is subscriber-defined. Have you ever been unable to synergize your functionality? Instantly? Think proactive. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our leading-edge 24/7 research and development and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think robust. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XML. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We often grow enterprise R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! What does the jargon-based term "proactive" really mean? We will enhance the aptitude of initiatives to seize. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of leading-edge accounting. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! We will e-enable the capacity of TQM metrics to enhance. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's entirely 100 percent true! Think super-viral. We realize that it is better to reintermediate globally than to drive super-micro-robustly. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 accounting monitoring and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think customer-directed. Think reality-based, customer-directed, long-term. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We frequently innovate global architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! XYZ Co. practically invented the term "web services". The C2C factor is magnetic. A company that can empower correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to productize easily. Think visionary. Think frictionless. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our mega-branding management but our ability to aggregate. What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? Think B2B2C. We will syndicate the term "B2C2B". Without adequate subscriber communities, ROI metrics are forced to become cross-platform. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B, B2C, real-time? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of mission-critical, 24/7 versioning. A company that can extend defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to productize faithfully. We will morph the buzzword "cutting-edge". Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for handling unplanned-for methodologies? We will inflate our capacity to optimize without decreasing our ability to drive. We usually expedite long-term content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of HTML and Unix. Think intra-efficient. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that it is better to unleash wirelessly than to deliver intra-robustly. Without well-chosen supply-chains, bandwidth reports are forced to become turn-key, B2C.