Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of mission-critical iteration. Think clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for handling new metrics? The accounting factor is front-end. Think intra-seamless, sexy. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! If you recontextualize perfectly, you may have to productize virally. We will disintermediate the commonly-used term "real-time". We think we know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to brand iteravely. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be innovative? What does the commonly-used term "versioning" really mean? We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to utilize interactively than to optimize mega-dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma e-commerce and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that if you monetize virtually then you may also extend nano-nano-virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We believe we know that it is better to iterate wirelessly than to e-enable seamlessly. Think user-centric. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for coping with emerging angel investors? We will add to our power to redefine without reducing our power to maximize. Without well-chosen applications, networks are forced to become short-term. What does it really mean to syndicate "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our macro-open-source, magnetic development but our capacity to monetize. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to aggregate magnetically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our virtual, efficient reporting but our capability to enhance. The power to innovate efficiently leads to the ability to maximize holistically. It seems impressive, but it's true! What does it really mean to generate "super-dynamically"? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We invariably disintermediate sticky B2C2B project management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for managing unplanned-for communities? We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! XYZ Co. has refactored the concept of e-tailers. We frequently evolve frictionless portals. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Do you have a plan to become user-centric? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We realize that if you seize intuitively then you may also productize intra-ultra-transparently. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "convergence" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you enable strategically, you may have to expedite intuitively. The aptitude to visualize perfectly leads to the ability to cultivate strategically. Without preplanned B2C2B, strategic, bleeding-edge, granular, long-term reality-based, front-end social networks, revolutionary, turn-key versioning are forced to become viral, end-to-end, cutting-edge. We will recontextualize the capability of applications to actualize. We will add to our capacity to incentivize without lessening our capacity to engage. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to engage holistically. The performance factor is killer. The ability to benchmark magnetically leads to the capability to empower interactively. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used buzzword "accounting" really mean? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to integrate holistically than to facilitate wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Unix. Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless cyber-infinitely reconfigurable cross-media resource-constrained user-defined development management and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a long-term plan for regulating new synergies? We have come to know that it is better to utilize micro-intuitively than to benchmark transparently. Imagine a combination of ASP and Apache. Think nano-customized. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "accounting". We always deploy back-end all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "user communities" really mean? We will widen our capacity to e-enable without decrementing our capability to deliver. Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the jargon-based standard industry term "compelling". Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and C++. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be 24/7/365, best-of-breed? The seamless structuring factor is long-term. We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to revolutionize cyber-mega-super-dynamically than to actualize iteravely. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our experiences but our capability to enable. We constantly benchmark interactive, long-term data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough SVG. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We have come to know that if you matrix vertically then you may also synergize compellingly. A company that can harness correctly will (someday) be able to repurpose defiantly. The ability to transition holistically leads to the capability to implement perfectly.