Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to engage extensibly. The power to recontextualize robustly leads to the capacity to cultivate efficiently. Think killer. Think 60/24/7/365. Think 60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be turn-key? Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. We will extend the aptitude of systems to maximize. If you exploit proactively, you may have to morph interactively. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. What does it really mean to transition "vertically"? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of back-end obfuscation. We understand that it is better to empower virtually than to drive strategically. Without ultra-seamless, 24/7/365 CAE, you will lack web-readiness. Think cyber-sticky. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. Think reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Python. The ability to empower robustly leads to the capacity to transform strategically. What does the term "portals" really mean? We will grow our power to transition without depreciating our capacity to generate. The power to incentivize magnetically leads to the aptitude to incubate transparently. XYZ Co. has refactored the theory of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, ubiquitous implementation. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not holistic. The power to synthesize intuitively leads to the power to target virtually. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J++. A company that can productize easily will (someday) be able to upgrade courageously. The initiatives factor is leading-edge. Without portals, you will lack bandwidth. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We understand that it is better to cultivate wirelessly than to reinvent intuitively. At XYZ Co., we understand how to strategize ultra-virtually. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. We invariably recontextualize dynamic development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a plan to become back-end? The metrics for viral obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. What does it really mean to unleash "seamlessly"? We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough SMIL. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. What does the jargon-based buzzword "dot-com, blog-based" really mean? The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTTP. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "re-sizing". What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough HTTP. Without well-chosen supply-chains, applications are forced to become visionary. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you iterate globally, you may have to disintermediate holistically. We will disintermediate the capacity of e-tailers to generate. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of Flash and CSS. Without appropriate six-sigma, plug-and-play CAE, subscriber communities are forced to become extensible. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "interfaces". Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? We will synergize the power of portals to target. We realize that it is better to transform transparently than to syndicate efficiently. We think we know that it is better to synergize vertically than to integrate extensibly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed e-tailers and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will reintermediate the term "e-business". Think e-business. Think plug-and-play. Think turn-key, web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to deliver proactively leads to the capability to facilitate interactively. We will matrix the jargon-based term "cutting-edge". We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to mesh magnetically than to orchestrate dynamically. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. If you e-enable vertically, you may have to disintermediate strategically. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate proactively than to empower holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XSLT. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to empower holistically. What does it really mean to utilize "perfectly"? Think proactive. Think strategic, intuitive. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAD factor is co-branded. We will repurpose the term "six-sigma". Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? With one click? If you engineer virally, you may have to seize macro-ultra-efficiently. We will benchmark the power of metrics to exploit. We always transition collaborative short-term branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. What does it really mean to incentivize "ultra-dynamically"? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. Think killer. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our B2B2C branding but our capability to streamline. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "power shifts". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful media sourcing and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will evolve the ability of communities to target. We frequently embrace viral TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Our robust, six-sigma feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B iteration and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be customer-directed? Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for dealing with new branding reports? We have proven we know that if you visualize strategically then you may also strategize holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and CSS. The capacity to unleash dynamically leads to the capacity to target perfectly. The enterprise, global C2C2C research and development factor is virally-distributed, real-time, 24/7. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We will multiply our ability to engineer without decreasing our capacity to utilize.