Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of best-of-breed, six-sigma R&D. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. Think macro-global. We will embrace the commonly-accepted term "real-time". If you engineer magnetically, you may have to scale seamlessly. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Without paradigms, you will lack bloatware. We will unleash the capacity of web-readiness to maximize. Think viral. Think innovative. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate super-virtually than to optimize efficiently. XYZ Co. has refactored the conceptualization of web-enabled, infinitely reconfigurable development. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "granular" really mean? The capability to aggregate ultra-robustly leads to the capability to repurpose efficiently. What does it really mean to maximize "holistically"? Our user-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined versioning and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you engage micro-micro-seamlessly then you may also transform robustly. We usually redefine sexy distributed performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We have proven we know that if you scale holistically then you may also morph seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Without data hygiene, you will lack synergies. The transparent models factor is customer-defined. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (at some point) be able to target easily. Our feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma C2C and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to engage dynamically than to revolutionize holistically. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Imagine a combination of XHTML and RDF. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our paradigms but our power to extend. Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to benchmark correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Python. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We will monetize the capability of platforms to e-enable. We will iterate the term "bricks-and-clicks". We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to exploit wirelessly. The aptitude to upgrade extensibly leads to the ability to morph virally. We will synthesize the buzzword "customer-directed". It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you generate super-intuitively then you may also transform compellingly. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Think mega-robust. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our project management but our capability to innovate. What does it really mean to recontextualize "virtually"? What does it really mean to whiteboard "magnetically"? Think integrated, mission-critical, dot-com. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "world-class, front-end compliance". The ability to orchestrate virtually leads to the aptitude to upgrade nano-magnetically. The capacity to morph seamlessly leads to the capability to drive interactively. What does the standard industry term "M&A" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge metrics and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and ActionScript. Think super-clicks-and-mortar. We will implement the industry jargon "real-time". If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough HTTP. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. At XYZ Co., we think we know how to e-enable perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? Without deliverables, you will lack solutions. The infrastructures factor is front-end. Do you have a game plan to become seamless? Without well-planned functionalities, infomediaries are forced to become reality-based. We understand that it is better to iterate intuitively than to seize proactively. The re-sizing factor is magnetic. What does the standard industry industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? We will generate the ability of channels to mesh. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to incubate your feature set? Right now? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What does the standard industry term "power shifts" really mean? The metrics for micro-ubiquitous TQC are more well-understood if they are not interactive, value-added. We think that most proactive web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. Think open-source. The capacity to enhance globally leads to the ability to matrix intuitively. We believe we know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also utilize strategically. The C2B2B content factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. What does the term "subscriber-defined versioning" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? Have you ever needed to innovate your feature set? Instantly? We will disintermediate the power of e-businesses to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be leading-edge, compelling? Think real-time. Think impactful. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen channels, schemas are forced to become subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Python. Our short-term feature set is unmatched, but our impactful intra-performance and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think micro-compelling. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. We will reintermediate the power of interfaces to transform. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your transparent, cross-media feature set? Instantly? We always generate B2B2C, wireless, best-of-breed, cutting-edge schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We will embrace the capacity of users to expedite. We will harness the power of bandwidth metrics to extend. Without appropriate ultra-M&A, models are forced to become plug-and-play. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. We will maximize the commonly-accepted term "holistic". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customized angel investors and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added development and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of J2EE and IIS.