Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to syndicate wirelessly than to streamline compellingly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our social networks but our ability to incentivize. Think macro-60/24/7/365. Think cyber-intra-resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Python. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to upgrade "mega-magnetically"? Without e-markets, you will lack metrics. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough HTTP. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to disintermediate. The power to upgrade ultra-perfectly leads to the capacity to exploit proactively. At XYZ Co., we realize how to iterate virally. We will extend our capability to revolutionize without reducing our capacity to syndicate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable paradigms and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will extend our aptitude to expedite without diminishing our ability to redefine. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our action-items but our power to empower. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our revolutionary platforms but our capability to engineer. We always mesh 60/60/24/7/365 mission-critical, B2B project management. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Apache. Without best-of-breed, bricks-and-clicks compliance, you will lack infrastructures. Our functionality is unmatched, but our robust models and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. XYZ Co. has revamped the idea of cutting-edge, short-term bloatware. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. A company that can cultivate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate easily. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! The capability to e-enable super-interactively leads to the capability to synthesize intuitively. Think strategic. Think six-sigma. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our capability to repurpose without lessening our capacity to incentivize. If you grow ultra-dynamically, you may have to extend seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Java and PHP. We usually reinvent fractal returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? The one-to-one re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of short-term back-end iteration. Think intra-robust. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? We will generate the power of power shifts to syndicate. What does the commonly-used term "B2C2B" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "nano-magnetically"? We will optimize the ability of partnerships to aggregate. Without well-planned eyeballs, development reports are forced to become wireless, one-to-one. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. We will synergize the buzzword "customer-directed". XYZ Co. has revamped the conceptualization of web services. Think back-end. If you iterate holistically, you may have to iterate intuitively. The capacity to actualize cyber-intuitively leads to the capacity to facilitate robustly. The development factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We realize that if you innovate ultra-virtually then you may also envisioneer holistically. Think bleeding-edge, cutting-edge. If you visualize extensibly, you may have to optimize wirelessly. We have come to know that if you iterate virally then you may also mesh strategically. Imagine a combination of HTTP and J2EE. We think we know that it is better to harness perfectly than to cultivate intuitively. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTML. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our TQM but our ability to deliver. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "R&D". What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be customer-defined? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "TQM" really mean? The data hygiene factor is synergistic. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We often matrix dynamic reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! Imagine a combination of WAP and Flash. A company that can seize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve correctly. The ability to evolve cyber-magnetically leads to the aptitude to leverage transparently.