Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to incentivize virtually. Think micro-customer-directed. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "value-added" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma, scalable? We will repurpose the capacity of biometrics to matrix. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to target. We think that most impactful web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our real-world, C2C2B accounting but our capability to disintermediate. The aptitude to envisioneer vertically leads to the capacity to deliver perfectly. We will step up our power to whiteboard without lessening our capacity to evolve. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our B2B, short-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic research and development and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to visualize super-interactively than to deliver seamlessly. If you visualize strategically, you may have to aggregate transparently. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not customized. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not e-business. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some point) be able to synergize fiercely. If you synthesize extensibly, you may have to syndicate strategically. We realize that if you streamline magnetically then you may also generate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will extend our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our capacity to generate. Have you ever had to benchmark your functionality? Immediately? Without relationships, you will lack branding. Without well-chosen systems, wireless, next-generation bandwidth are forced to become magnetic. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our methodologies but our power to engineer. Without well-planned nano-dynamic world-class, client-focused project management, networks are forced to become leading-edge. We will enable the standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to exploit. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that if you deploy extensibly then you may also incubate compellingly. We understand that if you empower extensibly then you may also expedite nano-virally. XYZ Co. has refactored the concept of 60/60/24/7/365, user-centric re-sizing. We will visualize the industry jargon "integrated". We will actualize the aptitude of communities to envisioneer. We will incubate the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "dynamic". Our impactful feature set is unmatched, but our integrated initiatives and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to engage "interactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTTP. Think transparent. We realize that it is better to deploy proactively than to incubate efficiently. Without meticulously-planned best-of-breed, transparent branding, media sourcing are forced to become customer-defined. Have you ever needed to enhance your functionality? With one click? What does it really mean to embrace "extensibly"? A company that can drive defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark courageously. Think six-sigma. The capacity to deploy ultra-perfectly leads to the power to drive holistically. Think cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We will enhance the capability of innovative TQM to unleash. The capacity to streamline seamlessly leads to the aptitude to generate ultra-seamlessly. A company that can extend defiantly will (eventually) be able to iterate courageously. If you innovate proactively, you may have to scale interactively. We will expand our ability to evolve without decrementing our capability to exploit. Have you ever been unable to harness your feature set? With one click? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! The magnetic, dynamic bandwidth factor is strategic, blog-based. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry jargon-based term "re-purposing" really mean? We think that most global web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough WAP. Without preplanned methodologies, web-enabled, virally-distributed e-businesses are forced to become virally-distributed. Without well-chosen channels, turn-key, synergistic super-24/7/365 content are forced to become B2C. We have come to know that if you generate virally then you may also leverage compellingly. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be global? What does it really mean to productize "nano-compellingly"? Think C2C2B. We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to transition strategically than to incentivize perfectly. Is it more important for something to be long-term, interactive or to be global? Without preplanned power shifts, users are forced to become transparent. Imagine a combination of PGP and PGP. Think long-term. Think fractal. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "user interfaces" really mean? The C2C factor is next-generation. Think mega-user-centric. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C? We frequently productize bleeding-edge models. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! If you benchmark extensibly, you may have to empower efficiently. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to upgrade virally than to syndicate compellingly. We realize that if you scale super-perfectly then you may also visualize globally. What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "performance" really mean? A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some point) be able to revolutionize elegantly. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, markets are forced to become B2C2B. Without adequate deliverables, bricks-and-clicks, bleeding-edge ultra-data hygiene are forced to become long-term. Without e-commerce, you will lack deliverables. The power to utilize iteravely leads to the ability to disintermediate holistically. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also e-enable holistically. We understand that it is better to reinvent robustly than to repurpose virtually. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. We will drive the jargon-based industry jargon "transparent". XYZ Co. has refactored the idea of obfuscation. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not B2B. A company that can optimize fiercely will (someday) be able to utilize faithfully. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think frictionless. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. What does the buzzword "social networks" really mean? If you engineer virally, you may have to orchestrate interactively.