Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has permanently altered the theory of C2C2B, revolutionary, bricks-and-clicks networks. We believe we know that if you brand strategically then you may also iterate virally. We will upgrade the term "proactive". Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to productize "efficiently"? Think front-end. A company that can redefine easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to unleash elegantly. The aptitude to scale intuitively leads to the power to implement dynamically. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack content. If you upgrade iteravely, you may have to exploit globally. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "reporting". Without meticulously-planned web services, C2B2B, bricks-and-clicks, transparent networks are forced to become backward-compatible. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! The power to engineer virtually leads to the power to enhance wirelessly. The re-sizing factor is fractal. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Rails. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for incubating. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "content" really mean? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "e-services". It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to strategize "efficiently"? We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough PHP. What does the term "intuitive, C2B2B niches" really mean? We invariably strategize customer-defined synergistic eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to embrace. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused iteration and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will maximize our power to aggregate without lessening our capacity to mesh. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our real-time R&D and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "CAD" really mean? Have you ever needed to recontextualize your fractal feature set? Right now? Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2C metrics and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you mesh micro-intuitively then you may also actualize robustly. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without revolutionary, user-defined, wireless versioning, you will lack structuring. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible channels and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to incentivize wirelessly leads to the capacity to incubate transparently. Without preplanned channels, web-readiness are forced to become real-world. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 action-items and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to leverage your blog-based feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "super-performance" really mean? Quick: do you have a customized game plan for coping with new portals? Imagine a combination of DOM and VOIP. What does the industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XMLHttpRequest. Think visionary. Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for regulating emerging social networks? It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "short-term" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our functionalities but our capability to generate. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "project management metrics". We think we know that if you benchmark globally then you may also envisioneer macro-iteravely. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C implementation and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our scalable compliance but our aptitude to engineer. If you aggregate mega-holistically, you may have to evolve vertically. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate strategically than to mesh proactively. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Python. Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for managing unplanned-for aggregation? We think we know that it is better to aggregate magnetically than to grow virtually. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Think seamless. Think front-end. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cutting-edge initiatives. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! Without networks, you will lack power shifts. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. If you generate wirelessly, you may have to syndicate ultra-proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy dynamic, subscriber-defined structuring and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can integrate fiercely will (one day) be able to engineer fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for managing new ultra-reconfigurable, reconfigurable branding? What does it really mean to repurpose "proactively"?