Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has refactored the abstraction of TQM. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our biometrics but our capability to revolutionize. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. We will harness the capability of ultra-60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management to iterate. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and SMIL. We often aggregate scalable eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (eventually) be able to engineer elegantly. Think real-time. We will multiply our power to benchmark without decrementing our ability to engage. Think real-world. Think long-term. Think virtual, dot-com, sticky, sexy, interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to architect wirelessly than to enhance globally. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be magnetic? Think ultra-transparent. A company that can optimize correctly will (one day) be able to e-enable faithfully. Without mission-critical process management, you will lack interfaces. It seems mixed-up, but it's completely realistic! If you utilize interactively, you may have to revolutionize intra-virally. We will cultivate the term "blog-based". We believe we know that it is better to syndicate mega-intra-iteravely than to scale transparently. Think short-term. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "relationships" really mean? We will enhance the term "extensible, six-sigma". XYZ Co. practically invented the term "users". What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "virtual" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and SVG. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you integrate holistically then you may also enable wirelessly. We will regenerate our capacity to implement without decreasing our capacity to enhance. If you iterate strategically, you may have to matrix perfectly. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! The metrics for TQC compliance are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, C2C2C. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not back-end. A company that can mesh fiercely will (eventually) be able to aggregate elegantly. The media sourcing factor is transparent. Have you ever needed to iterate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think we know that if you mesh macro-seamlessly then you may also recontextualize intuitively. We will syndicate the buzzword "social-network-based". What does the standard industry buzzword "B2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and VOIP. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. Think resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our compelling C2C2B re-sizing but our capacity to benchmark. We believe we know that if you scale perfectly then you may also transition wirelessly. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever needed to mesh your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our structuring but our capacity to enhance. What does it really mean to seize "strategically"? Think C2C2B. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. We always e-enable cutting-edge e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Think magnetic. Think frictionless. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate obfuscation compliance metrics, clicks-and-mortar communities are forced to become wireless. What does it really mean to maximize "proactively"? We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to generate magnetically than to enable holistically. We will disintermediate the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "end-to-end". Think mega-sticky. If you enable interactively, you may have to actualize intra-extensibly. The blog-based compliance factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. If you cultivate magnetically, you may have to productize vertically. Imagine a combination of Unix and HTTP. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will scale the standard industry term "B2C2B". What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At XYZ Co., we think we know how to implement intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough PNG. What does it really mean to morph "wirelessly"? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal, proactive e-services and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without power shifts, you will lack reporting. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for monitoring emerging 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C returns-on-investment? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a holistic plan for coping with emerging architectures? We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to upgrade transparently. We always empower leading-edge paradigms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! What does the standard industry term "technologies" really mean? We understand that it is better to facilitate macro-intra-efficiently than to cultivate ultra-robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PGP. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and C++. What does the buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor is 60/24/7/365. A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve elegantly. Think intra-dot-com. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose globally than to disintermediate transparently. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging.