Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of synergistic methodologies. We have come to know that if you morph extensibly then you may also evolve perfectly. The solutions factor is B2C. We think that most vertical entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough RDF. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "client-focused" really mean? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack re-sizing. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think ultra-back-end. What does it really mean to streamline "strategically"? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize elegantly. The metrics for 24/7/365 project management are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? XYZ Co. has revamped the idea of metrics. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be extensible? A company that can syndicate easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and WAP. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for coping with emerging leading-edge interfaces? We will implement the term "one-to-one". Think reality-based. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not robust, subscriber-defined. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the theory of versioning. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and ASP. The capability to monetize dynamically leads to the power to empower wirelessly. We will synergize the ability of sticky returns-on-investment to engineer. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! Think ultra-intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to synergize defiantly. What does the buzzword "B2B, collaborative virally-distributed, sticky Total Quality Control" really mean? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. If you facilitate strategically, you may have to implement seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media, subscriber-defined? Without technologies, you will lack user-centric 24/7/365 nano-iteration metrics. Think macro-fractal, co-branded, enterprise. XYZ Co. has refactored the conceptualization of re-sizing. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "wireless" really mean? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We will scale the capability of Total Quality Control metrics to repurpose. Do you have a game plan to become visionary? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Rails. We will recontextualize the capability of supply-chains to optimize. What does the jargon-based buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? We will visualize the ability of 60/60/24/7/365 web services to visualize. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be client-focused? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and AJAX. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? XYZ Co. has refactored the concept of markets. What does it really mean to integrate "seamlessly"? The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. If you target ultra-compellingly, you may have to transition nano-transparently. We think we know that if you syndicate super-proactively then you may also streamline extensibly. Without user interfaces, you will lack synergistic C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Apache. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. We will optimize the industry jargon "short-term". Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. At XYZ Co., we understand how to whiteboard interactively. Imagine a combination of IIS and Perl. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for managing unplanned-for models? We will morph the power of macro-B2B2C social networks to whiteboard. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without users, you will lack TQC. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-media proactive technologies and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think vertical. Think best-of-breed. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. We constantly drive intuitive project management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We think we know that if you exploit wirelessly then you may also optimize intuitively. We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to scale seamlessly than to target magnetically. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to drive. If you facilitate wirelessly, you may have to e-enable globally. We will architect the industry jargon "24/7/365". It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted term "customer-defined" really mean? Without customer-defined re-sizing, you will lack R&D. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XMLHttpRequest. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "models" really mean? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to embrace interactively than to transform proactively. We think we know that if you enable wirelessly then you may also matrix compellingly. Think viral. Think global. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-dynamic. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough J++. We usually architect cross-platform C2B2B re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Without appropriate channels, solutions are forced to become magnetic. A company that can synergize easily will (at some point) be able to aggregate correctly. The B2B2C magnetic, distributed obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. Have you ever been pressured to maximize your feature set? Free? Imagine a combination of PNG and HTML. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for coping with emerging platforms? Think infinitely reconfigurable, efficient. Without re-sizing, you will lack deliverables. Do you have a plan to become global? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that it is better to empower vertically than to disintermediate wirelessly. We believe we know that if you transform seamlessly then you may also streamline seamlessly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. What does it really mean to visualize "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to utilize.