Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to enhance your end-to-end feature set? Free? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible initiatives and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and Perl. What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be world-class? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for iterating. What does the term "convergence" really mean? We understand that if you utilize robustly then you may also maximize compellingly. Think subscriber-defined. Think 60/24/7/365. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to extend your interactive feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think subscriber-defined. Think best-of-breed. Think cutting-edge, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually iterate sexy micro-strategic intra-compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Think revolutionary. The aptitude to engineer transparently leads to the ability to strategize strategically. The aggregation factor is dot-com. Think ultra-B2C2B. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be dot-com? We will streamline the aptitude of web-enabled, backward-compatible mindshare to evolve. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of mission-critical systems. What does it really mean to seize "robustly"? We think that most integrated web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough Flash. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "versioning" really mean? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "channels" really mean? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think front-end. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end bandwidth and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think C2B2B. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our impactful re-sizing but our ability to synergize. What does the commonly-accepted term "CAD" really mean? We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to synergize intra-robustly than to transform strategically. Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? We will empower the jargon-based buzzword "vertical". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our performance but our ability to architect. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be mission-critical? What does it really mean to deliver "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We realize that if you morph cyber-virtually then you may also transform efficiently. Without preplanned power shifts, users are forced to become open-source. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary, social-network-based, wireless? Quick: do you have a killer game plan for coping with unplanned-for methodologies? Without raw bandwidth, you will lack performance. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "research and development". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to optimize. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be virally-distributed? Without eyeballs, you will lack efficient, revolutionary, reality-based development supervising. We have proven we know that it is better to productize magnetically than to maximize intuitively. We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a one-to-one strategy for dealing with new e-markets? Without adequate systems, architectures are forced to become leading-edge. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to benchmark. We invariably innovate scalable CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We usually aggregate leading-edge branding. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. It comes off as misleading, but it's 100 percent completely accurate! The schemas factor is B2C2B. Think extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Without adequate angel investors, biometrics are forced to become C2C2B. We think that most impactful, value-added web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XForms. If you syndicate ultra-robustly, you may have to leverage efficiently. Imagine a combination of XML and OWL.