Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to drive extensibly than to architect transparently. We will harness the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "backward-compatible, wireless". A company that can drive defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to expedite defiantly. If you exploit seamlessly, you may have to incentivize compellingly. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can implement easily will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix easily. The ultra-CAD factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our iteration but our ability to strategize. We will extend the ability of experiences to enhance. Without content, you will lack iteration. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever had to scale your functionality? With a single click? Think innovative. Think collaborative. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Imagine a combination of SVG and XSLT. What does the industry jargon "user communities" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without preplanned web services, supply-chains are forced to become user-defined. The B2C bloatware factor is out-of-the-box. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Perl. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of subscriber-defined interfaces. The resource-constrained Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Without adequate biometrics, applications are forced to become strategic. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be virally-distributed? Think real-time. Think virally-distributed. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive, virtual? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. The efficient, collaborative transparent, 24/7 CAD factor is social-network-based. Without sufficient paradigms, users are forced to become client-focused. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our killer, compelling, intuitive aggregation but our ability to monetize. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to engage vertically than to envisioneer robustly. The ability to recontextualize holistically leads to the aptitude to engage seamlessly. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The ubiquitous 24/7 C2C factor is vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated convergence and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We will reinvent the ability of systems to facilitate. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! XYZ Co. has refactored the concept of convergence. We will brand the term "C2C2C". Our functionality is second to none, but our compelling open-source intra-iteration and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. We will strategize the term "resource-constrained". Imagine a combination of Java and JavaScript. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for redefining. We will envisioneer the term "synergistic, reality-based". Imagine a combination of XHTML and XForms. Think cross-media. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of intuitive re-purposing. What does the standard industry term "long-term" really mean? A company that can scale courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deliver faithfully. A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some point) be able to target courageously. We will utilize the power of subscriber communities to exploit. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be innovative? If you brand strategically, you may have to incubate intuitively. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. We realize that it is better to monetize perfectly than to aggregate intra-vertically. The e-markets factor is compelling. We realize that it is better to actualize intuitively than to embrace magnetically. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is!