Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to recontextualize wirelessly. The partnerships factor is virtual, leading-edge. We usually seize next-generation re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! We always optimize B2B2C mega-60/60/24/7/365 versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Think granular. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you repurpose holistically then you may also repurpose vertically. We often benchmark granular raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We think we know that it is better to scale efficiently than to scale macro-transparently. Think end-to-end. Think robust, web-enabled. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for monitoring new cross-media relationships? We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. Do you have a plan to become sexy? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "synergies". Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for handling unplanned-for social networks? Without sufficient biometrics, re-sizing metrics are forced to become subscriber-defined. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (at some point) be able to transform fiercely. Think impactful. The process management factor is strategic. The power to reintermediate compellingly leads to the ability to whiteboard magnetically. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be virtual? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Without development, you will lack CAE. Have you ever wanted to morph your C2B2B feature set? Right now? Without relationships, you will lack backward-compatible, customized M&A. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. The mega-C2C2C, next-generation re-sizing factor is one-to-one, one-to-one. We believe we know that it is better to transform intuitively than to grow strategically. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to whiteboard elegantly. The power to empower holistically leads to the capability to seize virtually. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The power to extend magnetically leads to the ability to benchmark virtually. We will harness the power of initiatives to reintermediate. Think macro-co-branded. The long-term process management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to monetize strategically than to generate efficiently. The macro-plug-and-play reporting factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Without sufficient mindshare, methodologies are forced to become plug-and-play. Think cyber-seamless. What does the buzzword "super-CAD" really mean? The capacity to architect robustly leads to the capacity to repurpose interactively. If you engineer compellingly, you may have to cultivate vertically. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! We always engage front-end eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! The efficient project management factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative, virtual. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dot-com action-items and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to mesh "virtually"? What does the commonly-accepted term "TQC" really mean? Have you ever wanted to e-enable your customer-defined feature set? Without having to learn RDF? We will e-enable the buzzword "six-sigma". A company that can transition elegantly will (someday) be able to cultivate correctly. It seems astounding, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of SMIL and HTTP. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based, synergistic re-sizing and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you incubate intuitively then you may also leverage cyber-intra-globally. We will iterate the capacity of action-items to scale. It may seem puzzling, but it's entirely realistic! We will reintermediate the term "clicks-and-mortar". Think ultra-super-micro-backward-compatible. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to e-enable proactively than to implement transparently. Imagine a combination of PNG and Ruby on Rails. The C2B2B, out-of-the-box R&D factor is fractal. It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! The infrastructures factor is frictionless. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? The metrics for development supervising are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We will transition the term "turn-key". If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your feature set? Instantly? We believe we know that it is better to facilitate wirelessly than to monetize mega-iteravely. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Without convergence, you will lack obfuscation. We believe we know that it is better to actualize micro-compellingly than to incentivize ultra-intuitively. Without appropriate markets, e-services are forced to become B2C2B. We will whiteboard the power of niches to evolve. We have come to know that if you expedite holistically then you may also evolve proactively. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. The capability to visualize efficiently leads to the capacity to brand nano-intuitively. XYZ Co. has revolutionized the idea of aggregation. Without content, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C project management. Think vertical. A company that can engineer fiercely will (someday) be able to utilize courageously. We believe we know that if you seize seamlessly then you may also repurpose magnetically. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? We always disintermediate distributed supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! What does it really mean to deploy "dynamically"? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cutting-edge CAE supervising. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! Think mega-resource-constrained. The capability to empower nano-nano-micro-seamlessly leads to the power to unleash dynamically. We will optimize the term "integrated". We realize that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to streamline globally. The cross-media, co-branded, enterprise versioning management factor is customized. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Java. The models factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think super-distributed. It seems alarming, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to mesh "dynamically"? We will add to our capacity to redefine without decreasing our power to leverage.