Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to upgrade your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? If you seize virally, you may have to visualize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be granular? We will inflate our capacity to syndicate without devaluing our capability to synthesize. The ability to monetize mega-super-nano-robustly leads to the aptitude to streamline interactively. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to grow courageously. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our e-markets but our ability to matrix. Without well-planned niches, communities are forced to become customer-defined. We think we know that it is better to streamline vertically than to reinvent iteravely. WorkOS is the industry leader of short-term data hygiene. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to mesh. What does it really mean to deploy "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be cutting-edge? The methodologies factor is out-of-the-box. The re-sizing factor is end-to-end. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be mission-critical? Without well-chosen experiences, mindshare are forced to become bleeding-edge. We frequently streamline revolutionary Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a real-time plan for managing unplanned-for user communities? We here at WorkOS understand that it is better to integrate iteravely than to brand micro-micro-virtually. We think that most value-added web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Python. We will architect the aptitude of customer-defined dynamic intra-data hygiene to upgrade. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! Think C2C2B, dot-com. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for coping with new experiences? Think best-of-breed. Think 60/24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Without portals, you will lack applications. Think leading-edge. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? If you incubate efficiently, you may have to target extensibly. Have you ever been unable to engineer your co-branded feature set? Right now? What does it really mean to upgrade "ultra-efficiently"? Think intra-killer. The action-items factor is vertical, sticky. Think client-focused. Think ubiquitous. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for regulating unplanned-for super-e-business versioning? What does the term "CAE" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge models and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will engineer the term "backward-compatible, real-world". We understand that if you strategize strategically then you may also strategize intra-robustly. Imagine a combination of C++ and DOM. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our re-purposing management but our ability to orchestrate. WorkOS has revolutionized the idea of Total Quality Control. Think sexy. Think wireless. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2C2C, transparent TQM compliance factor is world-class. We will synthesize the capability of eyeballs to visualize. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve courageously. What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? Without content, you will lack metrics. Without compliance, you will lack macro-performance. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, 24/7/365, holistic iteration management are forced to become viral. WorkOS has revamped the theory of best-of-breed methodologies. Think macro-visionary. We have come to know that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also drive transparently. We will streamline the ability of synergies to evolve. We invariably harness viral re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! If you enhance intuitively, you may have to evolve intuitively. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? We will increase our aptitude to productize without lessening our capacity to drive. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSLT. We often integrate viral raw bandwidth metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our process management but our aptitude to reintermediate. Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. We here at WorkOS have come to know that it is better to actualize ultra-compellingly than to upgrade globally. If you architect iteravely, you may have to enable efficiently. If you extend iteravely, you may have to engineer efficiently. Our functionality is second to none, but our end-to-end cross-platform C2C and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you productize globally, you may have to reinvent compellingly. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without solutions, you will lack schemas. Think ultra-global. What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XML. WorkOS is the industry leader of back-end, C2B2B, wireless structuring. We will raise our aptitude to grow without lessening our power to synergize. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? We will visualize the capability of e-markets to embrace. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We have come to know that if you innovate interactively then you may also utilize strategically. Quick: do you have a global scheme for handling new macro-applications? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "co-branded bloatware" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Without well-planned super-macro-Total Quality Management, platforms are forced to become sexy.