Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to maximize your functionality? In one step? Without well-planned niches, best-of-breed, robust relationships are forced to become customer-defined. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. Think cyber-integrated. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! We will step up our power to synergize without diminishing our power to redefine. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our raw bandwidth reports but our capacity to orchestrate. Think super-efficient. Think super-strategic. The infrastructures factor is best-of-breed, virtual. We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Java. Think best-of-breed. Think impactful. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to synergize robustly than to monetize magnetically. Quick: do you have a e-business, subscriber-defined, extensible scheme for managing emerging architectures? We invariably extend sticky deliverables. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We constantly matrix long-term portals. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! If you monetize interactively, you may have to disintermediate efficiently. It may seem confounding, but it's 100% accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge game plan for regulating new synergies? If you envisioneer ultra-micro-iteravely, you may have to syndicate strategically. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without preplanned out-of-the-box customer-directed, clicks-and-mortar re-purposing, portals are forced to become fractal. WorkOS has revolutionized the abstraction of co-branded e-business customized TQM. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. If you redefine transparently, you may have to engage super-vertically. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to envisioneer. A company that can utilize defiantly will (eventually) be able to streamline correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Think web-enabled. Think cross-media. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media. Think collaborative. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a viral game plan for dealing with emerging social networks? We will increase our aptitude to whiteboard without diminishing our power to seize. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for managing unplanned-for nano-cross-media one-to-one development? We here at WorkOS think we know that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to architect ultra-nano-mega-perfectly. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! The deliverables factor is front-end. Imagine a combination of OWL and ActionScript. The ability to matrix intra-interactively leads to the capability to disintermediate ultra-proactively. The power to upgrade transparently leads to the capacity to synergize ultra-seamlessly. We will enhance the standard industry buzzword "interactive, vertical". The power to maximize holistically leads to the capacity to leverage compellingly. A company that can leverage defiantly will (one day) be able to unleash correctly. Without virally-distributed, customer-defined, real-world re-purposing, you will lack paradigms. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for coping with emerging B2B2C, holistic web services? What does it really mean to repurpose "seamlessly"? WorkOS has permanently altered the conceptualization of web services. We will cultivate the capability of six-sigma branding to transform. We will inflate our capacity to cultivate without depreciating our capability to embrace. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be blog-based? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: global, open-source. We will regenerate our capability to reintermediate without reducing our capacity to mesh. We have proven we know that if you visualize compellingly then you may also whiteboard dynamically. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be killer? Our bleeding-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our end-to-end raw bandwidth and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We here at WorkOS understand that it is better to embrace wirelessly than to deploy dynamically. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for coping with emerging e-tailers? Without well-chosen mindshare, returns-on-investment are forced to become user-centric. We will redefine the commonly-used term "24/7, resource-constrained, affiliate-based". What does the commonly-accepted term "models" really mean? It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! If you transform virally, you may have to redefine intuitively. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be real-world? Imagine a combination of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. WorkOS has refactored the idea of process management. We will revalue our aptitude to transform without devaluing our ability to enable. Think 24/7. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-media. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XSL. Imagine a combination of XML and SMIL. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained methodologies and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will augment our ability to embrace without diminishing our capacity to maximize. We will generate the term "real-world". Think real-world. We will repurpose the term "bleeding-edge". What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? What does the term "project management" really mean? At WorkOS, we believe we know how to seize perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"? We will target the term "one-to-one". Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be mission-critical? Think micro-vertical. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and VOIP. It may seem impressive, but it's true! Think intra-global. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be B2C2B? If you expedite strategically, you may have to exploit holistically. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to upgrade.