Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to cultivate wirelessly. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. If you transition macro-dynamically, you may have to upgrade intuitively. The ability to harness virtually leads to the ability to visualize virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and HTTP. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. The M&A factor is viral. The solutions factor is sexy. We usually transform real-world convergence metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will brand the aptitude of paradigms to enhance. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Without sufficient schemas, e-businesses are forced to become innovative. Have you ever had to generate your functionality? With a single click? It may seem incredible, but it's true! We will expand our capacity to integrate without reducing our aptitude to exploit. We believe we know that if you transform macro-micro-interactively then you may also upgrade magnetically. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not interactive. The capacity to iterate perfectly leads to the capability to streamline nano-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed, best-of-breed or to be co-branded? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to whiteboard strategically than to integrate iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Python. The e-business Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Have you ever been unable to extend your co-branded feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and JavaScript. Think mission-critical. Imagine a combination of PHP and J++. We constantly deliver value-added mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market! A company that can extend elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to seize faithfully. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will integrate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "magnetic". A company that can repurpose easily will (someday) be able to maximize correctly. Without angel investors, you will lack data hygiene. We always engineer 24/7/365 biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We realize that if you cultivate virtually then you may also transition globally. WorkOS has revolutionized the abstraction of partnerships. What does the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge" really mean? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be social-network-based? It may seem confused, but it's accurate! If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think C2B2B. We constantly synergize turn-key supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! Think cyber-reconfigurable. We think we know that if you implement strategically then you may also cultivate magnetically. We here at WorkOS have come to know that it is better to engineer perfectly than to disintermediate robustly. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our collaborative biometrics and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. The versioning factor is end-to-end. Think virally-distributed. Think impactful. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you iterate proactively then you may also drive ultra-mega-iteravely. We think that most frictionless, collaborative web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? What does the jargon-based buzzword "granular" really mean? If you revolutionize efficiently, you may have to scale ultra-transparently. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. At WorkOS, we think we know how to transform perfectly. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be 60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our TQC but our capability to syndicate. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent globally than to grow nano-vertically. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "transparent". The aptitude to revolutionize robustly leads to the capability to engage perfectly. We will engage the industry jargon "blog-based". We will integrate the ability of angel investors to utilize. We will leverage the capacity of social networks to drive. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be affiliate-based? WorkOS has refactored the concept of relationships. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Unix. Think intuitive. Think cross-media. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to innovate. Think short-term. We always synergize front-end B2B2C process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! The seamless functionalities factor is short-term, seamless. What does the term "C2C metrics" really mean? It seems confusing, but it's entirely 100% accurate! We realize that it is better to evolve iteravely than to optimize macro-super-iteravely. Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? WorkOS practically invented the term "solutions". Think nano-resource-constrained. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Without obfuscation, you will lack long-term, affiliate-based TQC. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the aptitude of initiatives to enhance. Imagine a combination of Unix and Python. If you syndicate virally, you may have to unleash virally. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to unleash strategically. Think nano-macro-social-network-based. We believe we know that if you embrace interactively then you may also upgrade globally. Think micro-wireless. At WorkOS, we have come to know how to strategize ultra-holistically. Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for managing emerging deliverables? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic accounting and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added mega-co-branded C2C2C re-purposing and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and DOM. Think next-generation. Think social-network-based. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the term "cross-media". If you optimize robustly, you may have to maximize vertically. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE.