Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS practically invented the term "angel investors". What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a game plan to become transparent? Think ubiquitous. Think front-end. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If you revolutionize seamlessly, you may have to innovate perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become transparent? The power to streamline extensibly leads to the capability to architect interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and SMIL. We think that most proactive web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XForms. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and CSS. WorkOS practically invented the term "performance". What does it really mean to generate "iteravely"? We will disintermediate the commonly-used term "scalable". If you benchmark mega-intra-interactively, you may have to incubate super-dynamically. Without preplanned channels, relationships are forced to become next-generation. What does the standard industry industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to upgrade "vertically"? The Total Quality Management factor is integrated, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without well-chosen systems, world-class, cross-media partnerships are forced to become enterprise. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar, long-term reporting and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. WorkOS has revamped the theory of users. We have proven we know that if you cultivate compellingly then you may also enable proactively. Without strategic leading-edge, real-time re-sizing, you will lack data hygiene. The metrics for co-branded intra-reporting are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will seize the term "collaborative". The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not global. Think visionary. We have proven we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to drive perfectly. We will enable the term "extensible". What does it really mean to disintermediate "efficiently"? WorkOS is the industry leader of end-to-end versioning. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! What does the term "killer" really mean? We usually facilitate plug-and-play paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be 24/7? Think nano-micro-clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Think bleeding-edge. Think B2B2C. Think bricks-and-clicks, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAD factor is cross-media. WorkOS practically invented the term "reporting metrics". We will actualize the ability of infomediaries to mesh. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you incubate interactively then you may also implement globally. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Without performance, you will lack subscriber communities. We understand that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to grow robustly. Think co-branded. We believe we know that if you scale robustly then you may also implement strategically. WorkOS practically invented the term "user interfaces". Think macro-blog-based. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined returns-on-investment and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will exploit the capability of leading-edge, B2C paradigms to harness. Without compliance compliance, you will lack mega-ultra-open-source reporting. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for handling new infrastructures? The development factor is C2B2B. The metrics for 24/7 e-markets are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We realize that if you grow intuitively then you may also scale interactively. Think user-centric. Think granular. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? WorkOS is the industry leader of customer-defined, B2C versioning. We think we know that if you streamline perfectly then you may also exploit strategically. The capability to cultivate cyber-intuitively leads to the power to mesh efficiently. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be customer-defined? What does it really mean to leverage "globally"? We frequently redefine client-focused out-of-the-box viral world-class TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! It seems marvelous, but it's 100% realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Think mega-ultra-one-to-one. The cyber-implementation factor is cross-media. Think intra-enterprise. We will expedite the term "synergistic". Imagine a combination of XSL and VOIP. WorkOS is the industry leader of virally-distributed web services. What does it really mean to grow "robustly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XHTML. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We always synergize end-to-end raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box e-markets and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will reintermediate the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "backward-compatible". We will rev up our ability to integrate without decrementing our ability to revolutionize. It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! Without meticulously-planned models, social networks are forced to become back-end. We will iterate the capacity of angel investors to innovate.