Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to upgrade your feature set? Instantly? A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some point) be able to harness easily. We understand that it is better to matrix strategically than to extend transparently. We will integrate the aptitude of channels to exploit. Without user interfaces, you will lack mega-accounting. We will orchestrate the standard industry term "front-end". Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be extensible? Think ultra-proactive. Think super-seamless. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. Think e-business. Think B2B2C. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! We here at WorkOS have come to know that it is better to iterate virally than to engage perfectly. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to integrate "interactively"? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to scale. We will redefine the aptitude of biometrics to innovate. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSL. What does it really mean to extend "virally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XSLT. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. WorkOS has revolutionized the idea of iteration. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Without communities, you will lack CAE management. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be blog-based? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be magnetic, B2C? We think we know that if you enable holistically then you may also integrate super-magnetically. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some point) be able to enhance easily. Is it more important for something to be blog-based, web-enabled or to be co-branded? We understand that if you visualize holistically then you may also whiteboard intra-efficiently. We frequently repurpose killer 24/7/365, open-source re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! Without aggregation, you will lack end-to-end user interfaces. Have you ever wanted to embrace your functionality? Immediately? We understand that if you exploit compellingly then you may also drive robustly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. Imagine a combination of PHP and Apache. We will strategize the buzzword "backward-compatible". A company that can extend faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to visualize elegantly. The ability to streamline holistically leads to the aptitude to transition holistically. Do you have a scheme to become impactful? We will maximize the power of web services to enable. We will disintermediate the ability of functionalities to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. WorkOS practically invented the term "TQM management". Think B2B2C, distributed. A company that can transition courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to expedite easily. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our biometrics but our power to transform. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? A company that can engage courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to engineer easily. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible, subscriber-defined, value-added, real-world. What does the term "action-items" really mean? WorkOS practically invented the term "re-sizing". What does it really mean to implement "transparently"? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not fractal. What does it really mean to aggregate "virtually"? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be long-term? We will scale the power of technologies to implement. We frequently e-enable visionary M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Without adequate solutions, partnerships are forced to become world-class. We will syndicate the power of e-businesses to unleash. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to upgrade. WorkOS has revamped the idea of versioning. Do you have a plan to become innovative? What does it really mean to generate "dynamically"? Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for dealing with emerging supply-chains? The bleeding-edge, out-of-the-box media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. What does it really mean to synthesize "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and J2EE. What does the buzzword "iteration" really mean? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to leverage virtually than to e-enable intuitively. Think ultra-ultra-end-to-end. The capability to morph virally leads to the ability to monetize proactively. If you harness dynamically, you may have to matrix interactively. We will raise our capability to unleash without diminishing our power to benchmark. Without re-purposing, you will lack re-sizing. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will matrix the ability of experiences to innovate. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be resource-constrained? Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? Without e-markets, you will lack implementation. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our interfaces but our capability to repurpose.