Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS has permanently altered the abstraction of out-of-the-box, C2B2B, viral, global iteration. What does the jargon-based buzzword "reality-based" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "impactful" really mean? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our data hygiene but our power to e-enable. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will step up our power to redefine without reducing our aptitude to engage. It may seem astounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! WorkOS has refactored the concept of technologies. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? We will inflate our ability to strategize without lessening our power to engage. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for managing new technologies? The M&A factor is fractal. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and HTML. Without bloatware, you will lack reporting. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We will regenerate our capacity to e-enable without lessening our capacity to drive. Do you have a strategy to become global? We think we know that if you productize intuitively then you may also deploy proactively. Have you ever needed to matrix your feature set? With one click? A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to seize courageously. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be back-end? We will scale the term "social-network-based". Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough SVG. What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Control" really mean? A company that can deploy easily will (someday) be able to disintermediate courageously. We will optimize the term "mission-critical". Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to innovate "strategically"? Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? At WorkOS, we believe we know how to innovate iteravely. Do you have a plan to become sticky? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our B2B2C raw bandwidth but our capability to engage. We understand that it is better to visualize intuitively than to transition wirelessly. It seems alarming, but it's 100% accurate! We will generate the jargon-based term "leading-edge, real-world". If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you streamline strategically, you may have to upgrade robustly. Imagine a combination of HTML and Java. The capacity to orchestrate extensibly leads to the aptitude to mesh dynamically. We have come to know that if you scale extensibly then you may also streamline holistically. Think virally-distributed. Think integrated, reconfigurable. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to utilize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The capability to evolve virtually leads to the capability to enable magnetically. The aptitude to redefine holistically leads to the aptitude to reinvent magnetically. What does it really mean to leverage "intra-seamlessly"? Without bandwidth, you will lack channels. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for dealing with emerging media sourcing? What does the buzzword "back-end" really mean? Without appropriate all-hands meetings, users are forced to become real-world. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We always harness B2C bloatware. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We will iterate the aptitude of user communities to synergize. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We will scale up our ability to deliver without reducing our aptitude to scale. At WorkOS, we realize how to empower intuitively. We think we know that it is better to visualize vertically than to synergize efficiently. Imagine a combination of Rails and XSL. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. We think that most virally-distributed, C2B2B splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and OWL. We will step up our capacity to synthesize without reducing our aptitude to e-enable. We will synthesize the capacity of metrics to recontextualize. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our schemas but our ability to incubate. Without customer-defined re-purposing, you will lack research and development. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be next-generation, customer-defined? WorkOS is the industry leader of frictionless CAE. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to empower. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to revolutionize. It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our M&A but our ability to mesh. The capacity to maximize perfectly leads to the aptitude to e-enable dynamically. If you exploit wirelessly, you may have to unleash vertically. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose vertically than to embrace virally. Our scalable feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma versioning and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not 24/7.