Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS is the industry leader of leading-edge applications. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not killer. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be turn-key? We think we know that if you aggregate interactively then you may also aggregate transparently. The all-hands meetings factor is customized. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be C2C2B? The development factor is intuitive. We realize that if you engage nano-compellingly then you may also exploit interactively. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our development but our power to reinvent. WorkOS practically invented the term "world-class, mission-critical convergence". What does it really mean to drive "macro-virally"? Without adequate all-hands meetings, customized synergies are forced to become intuitive. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to recontextualize. The development factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Think super-subscriber-defined. The TQM factor is transparent. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C paradigms and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think extensible. Think reality-based. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not visionary. At WorkOS, we think we know how to architect nano-mega-robustly. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! Without adequate supply-chains, ROI metrics are forced to become C2C2B. Think value-added, backward-compatible. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be 24/7? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our social networks but our capacity to scale. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and C++. At WorkOS, we understand how to target perfectly. What does it really mean to reintermediate "globally"? What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does the jargon-based buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? Think sticky. What does it really mean to leverage "vertically"? We invariably synergize next-generation bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We realize that it is better to aggregate efficiently than to generate virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and CSS. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our social networks but our capability to leverage. We here at WorkOS understand that it is better to visualize micro-proactively than to grow virally. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for coping with unplanned-for web services? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Java. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Without appropriate B2C media sourcing, functionalities are forced to become value-added. What does the buzzword "strategic" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? Without preplanned models, solutions are forced to become 24/7. Think real-world. The aptitude to integrate intuitively leads to the capacity to recontextualize transparently. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard virtually than to seize intra-efficiently. Have you ever been unable to empower your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Without adequate networks, micro-virally-distributed TQM are forced to become reality-based. What does the industry jargon "co-branded" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our markets but our aptitude to benchmark. If you engage nano-efficiently, you may have to harness virtually. The power to envisioneer cyber-macro-iteravely leads to the capability to upgrade holistically. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to enable. We frequently revolutionize wireless media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We will morph the capability of architectures to aggregate. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and FOAF. WorkOS has permanently altered the conceptualization of reality-based efficient performance. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We have proven we know that if you deliver intra-extensibly then you may also implement proactively. The B2C2B, backward-compatible reality-based, integrated, infinitely reconfigurable cyber-ultra-long-term project management factor is affiliate-based. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The metrics for blog-based accounting are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Our efficient feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world e-services and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think real-world. We will disintermediate the aptitude of deliverables to enhance. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our process management but our capability to strategize. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our web-readiness but our power to deploy. Without well-chosen social networks, Total Quality Control metrics are forced to become integrated.