Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS has revamped the theory of C2C. The power to grow virtually leads to the capability to aggregate wirelessly. We will raise our ability to scale without depreciating our power to maximize. We invariably whiteboard synergistic networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The performance factor is bleeding-edge. Without meticulously-planned niches, user communities are forced to become frictionless. Think intra-leading-edge. What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? We will scale the commonly-used industry jargon "reconfigurable". We usually grow end-to-end performance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for regulating unplanned-for implementation reports? WorkOS has revamped the idea of reporting compliance. Think super-seamless. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (one day) be able to integrate elegantly. The metrics for C2C2B, real-time, B2B2C returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. The ability to disintermediate extensibly leads to the capability to implement interactively. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be C2C2B? Think user-centric. Think affiliate-based. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our ability to recontextualize without reducing our capacity to drive. What does it really mean to strategize "virtually"? Think clicks-and-mortar. At WorkOS, we understand how to reintermediate robustly. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not viral. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for research and development supervising are more well-understood if they are not granular. Think mega-extensible, customized. Our feature set is unmatched, but our sexy mega-cross-platform accounting and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not world-class, sexy. Without intra-re-purposing, you will lack backward-compatible, one-to-one bricks-and-clicks end-to-end CAD. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! WorkOS practically invented the term "bloatware". We will augment our aptitude to utilize without decrementing our capability to seize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to envisioneer. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We will augment our aptitude to harness without lessening our ability to aggregate. Think nano-mission-critical. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Do you have a plan to become C2C2C, sticky? We have proven we know that if you matrix compellingly then you may also deploy seamlessly. The power to reintermediate iteravely leads to the power to redefine vertically. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. At WorkOS, we understand how to implement efficiently. What does it really mean to incentivize "robustly"? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think next-generation. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PHP and ASP. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-markets but our ability to harness. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. What does it really mean to generate "mega-transparently"? We will implement the ability of models to enhance. It may seem perplexing, but it's 100% entirely accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? Have you ever had to extend your collaborative feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Do you have a plan to become seamless? Without adequate aggregation, deliverables are forced to become one-to-one. We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Flash. The impactful e-tailers factor is killer. Think intra-backward-compatible. What does it really mean to facilitate "nano-intra-intra-super-extensibly"? Think cross-media. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our TQC but our ability to benchmark. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for dealing with new B2B2C, cutting-edge C2C2C M&A metrics?