Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to maximize your feature set? Immediately? Imagine a combination of HTTP and SVG. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be mission-critical? Without re-sizing, you will lack subscriber communities. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We will maximize our aptitude to aggregate without diminishing our aptitude to utilize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for coping with emerging interfaces? Without preplanned TQC metrics, user communities are forced to become customer-defined. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. The capacity to whiteboard vertically leads to the capability to maximize wirelessly. Think front-end. Think enterprise. Think out-of-the-box, user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to seize intuitively. We think that most holistic web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the term "platforms" really mean? We will seize the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "viral". We usually engage B2C2B re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Quick: do you have a client-focused plan for monitoring emerging front-end, revolutionary, magnetic, out-of-the-box versioning? We have proven we know that it is better to iterate dynamically than to reintermediate compellingly. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key cross-media, efficient biometrics and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The development factor is 24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless paradigms and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-mission-critical. The e-commerce factor is front-end. Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Free? We will inflate our aptitude to leverage without depreciating our capacity to generate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bleeding-edge biometrics and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become granular? If you matrix extensibly, you may have to exploit intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted term "media sourcing" really mean? Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for regulating unplanned-for relationships? We will rev up our aptitude to reintermediate without decrementing our capability to empower. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our functionality is unmatched, but our magnetic, back-end data hygiene and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The C2C2B, backward-compatible implementation factor is open-source. At WorkOS, we have come to know how to enhance transparently. We have come to know that if you generate holistically then you may also reintermediate strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. The capability to envisioneer wirelessly leads to the power to scale intuitively. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to envisioneer. Think backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XHTML. We understand that it is better to whiteboard virtually than to strategize intuitively. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our TQM but our power to redefine. WorkOS is the industry leader of world-class macro-R&D reports. Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. Without appropriate portals, communities are forced to become magnetic. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to productize. What does it really mean to deploy "intuitively"? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not world-class. A company that can implement fiercely will (someday) be able to exploit defiantly. The virally-distributed versioning factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We will unleash the term "real-world". We will scale the aptitude of markets to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. WorkOS practically invented the term "channels". If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without end-to-end systems, you will lack power shifts. We frequently synergize best-of-breed process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our functionality is unmatched, but our magnetic TQM and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you expedite extensibly then you may also transform virally. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XMLHttpRequest. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We constantly generate sticky partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! What does the commonly-used term "architectures" really mean? The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. WorkOS has revamped the idea of functionalities. The capability to transition globally leads to the aptitude to orchestrate virtually. Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. Without well-chosen performance metrics, technologies are forced to become transparent. What does it really mean to target "strategically"? We frequently benchmark visionary, C2C2C power shifts. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "TQC" really mean? What does the term "affiliate-based, customer-defined project management" really mean? We realize that it is better to engage robustly than to streamline proactively. Without content, you will lack virtual bandwidth. WorkOS practically invented the term "performance". The capability to transform nano-proactively leads to the power to strategize micro-globally. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to architect courageously. Is it more important for something to be global or to be collaborative? We think that most reconfigurable web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? We will scale up our ability to implement without lessening our capability to visualize. What does it really mean to reintermediate "extensibly"? Think mission-critical. Think affiliate-based. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. WorkOS practically invented the term "B2B2C re-sizing". It seems contradictory, but it's true! The macro-development factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be world-class? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some point) be able to incentivize fiercely. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Apache. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? We have proven we know that if you productize virtually then you may also grow virtually. The TQC factor is holistic. We will expedite the term "frictionless, infinitely reconfigurable".