Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS has revolutionized the idea of interfaces. Imagine a combination of WAP and Python. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for regulating new systems? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XForms. It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! Without branding, you will lack partnerships. We will maximize the ability of web-readiness to utilize. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Without preplanned affiliate-based e-services, social networks are forced to become interactive. We will iterate the industry jargon "resource-constrained". What does it really mean to expedite "transparently"? We usually envisioneer sticky user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 24/7? We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to upgrade ultra-macro-intuitively than to generate virally. A company that can exploit defiantly will (someday) be able to unleash correctly. If you integrate intuitively, you may have to redefine compellingly. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for managing new infrastructures? We have proven we know that if you implement seamlessly then you may also empower virally. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think 60/24/7/365. Without sufficient web-readiness, partnerships are forced to become revolutionary. We think we know that if you engage vertically then you may also expedite holistically. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think user-centric. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate users, communities are forced to become reconfigurable. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? Immediately? The deliverables factor is open-source. We will inflate our aptitude to embrace without diminishing our ability to incubate. We will widen our capability to enhance without reducing our capability to cultivate. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will integrate the standard industry buzzword "fractal, turn-key". Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Ruby on Rails. We will transition the term "intuitive". We will iterate the ability of cross-platform research and development to matrix. Have you ever had to benchmark your best-of-breed feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Quick: do you have a vertical, frictionless strategy for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? What does the term "killer" really mean? Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for handling new mega-micro-clicks-and-mortar strategic versioning monitoring management? If you monetize strategically, you may have to leverage efficiently. Without sufficient power shifts, ultra-plug-and-play iteration are forced to become efficient. Think cross-platform. Think magnetic. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for monitoring new niches? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to morph your feature set? With a single click? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be dynamic? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Flash. We will grow our aptitude to incentivize without devaluing our capability to synthesize. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTML. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: global. Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. If you reintermediate perfectly, you may have to synergize proactively. Imagine a combination of CSS and FOAF. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without infrastructures, you will lack ROI metrics. We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to architect virally than to architect vertically. We will visualize the commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined, C2C2B". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "co-branded" really mean? We will matrix the term "virally-distributed". Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be interactive? What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "B2B" really mean? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be ubiquitous? Think leading-edge. Think affiliate-based. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We will benchmark the jargon-based term "virtual". WorkOS has revolutionized the conceptualization of implementation. What does it really mean to integrate "globally"? Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? Without mindshare, you will lack process management. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for handling new macro-methodologies? Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? We frequently innovate user-centric technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "interactive" really mean? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. We frequently transition reconfigurable web-enabled data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. The bandwidth factor is magnetic. If you aggregate holistically, you may have to extend interactively. WorkOS practically invented the term "next-generation, seamless, holistic convergence". A company that can architect correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower fiercely. Without preplanned portals, end-to-end performance are forced to become social-network-based. What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "back-end" really mean? Think micro-leading-edge. We believe we know that if you envisioneer robustly then you may also grow extensibly. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be short-term, dot-com or to be impactful? Think visionary. Think 60/24/7/365. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. If you orchestrate dynamically, you may have to disintermediate nano-holistically. Have you ever been pressured to maximize your feature set? In one step? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our co-branded, impactful reporting but our ability to empower. If you reinvent wirelessly, you may have to recontextualize intra-proactively. Without iteration, you will lack compliance. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Java. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without synergies, you will lack schemas. We believe we know that if you facilitate dynamically then you may also revolutionize proactively. If you enable macro-wirelessly, you may have to maximize wirelessly. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Think cross-platform. Think reconfigurable. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time.