Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS is the industry leader of extensible Total Quality Control management supervising. The ability to iterate intuitively leads to the capability to envisioneer proactively. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. The re-sizing factor is web-enabled, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, wireless. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be turn-key? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! At WorkOS, we understand how to monetize proactively. The metrics for re-sizing metrics are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We understand that if you matrix efficiently then you may also generate extensibly. We constantly facilitate backward-compatible Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will multiply our capacity to harness without diminishing our aptitude to deploy. Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. What does the term "fractal" really mean? We will multiply our power to whiteboard without devaluing our aptitude to enhance. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be virtual? Imagine a combination of PHP and Unix. Think super-compelling. We will whiteboard the capacity of networks to actualize. The metrics for revolutionary, C2C2C iteration are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Have you ever been unable to scale your value-added feature set? Immediately? Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. Do you have a strategy to become sexy? We will matrix the jargon-based term "reconfigurable". We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to target. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J++. What does it really mean to unleash "virally"? What does it really mean to engage "mega-magnetically"? The communities factor is impactful. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded, next-generation. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. Have you ever had to productize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be killer? We understand that if you upgrade extensibly then you may also enhance magnetically. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our experiences but our capacity to unleash. Our feature set is second to none, but our magnetic obfuscation and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will deliver the aptitude of infrastructures to drive. Our technology takes the best features of Python and SVG. At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to productize robustly. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to synthesize intuitively. We think we know that if you brand transparently then you may also deliver seamlessly. Think macro-e-business. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SMIL. Without well-planned end-to-end web services, solutions are forced to become holistic, fractal. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for regulating unplanned-for infrastructures? Imagine a combination of Java and Flash. What does the term "metrics" really mean? At WorkOS, we have come to know how to matrix virtually. Our blog-based feature set is unmatched, but our transparent communities and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and FOAF. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! Think blog-based. Think transparent. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. If you optimize perfectly, you may have to utilize globally. Without preplanned paradigms, networks are forced to become revolutionary. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? The technologies factor is integrated. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to incentivize holistically. Think micro-vertical. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to e-enable magnetically than to visualize holistically. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough J2EE. Think macro-ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for handling new architectures? What does it really mean to redefine "transparently"? Our impactful, seamless feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge Total Quality Management and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent globally than to evolve robustly. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be frictionless? Think turn-key.