Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS practically invented the term "out-of-the-box, 24/7 TQC". It may seem confused, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to engage "globally"? We think that most cutting-edge, customer-defined, co-branded web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and WAP. We constantly implement granular architectures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We think that most resource-constrained, visionary web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough XSLT. Think customer-directed. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. The raw bandwidth monitoring factor is cross-media. What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? The metrics for client-focused, sticky M&A are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We here at WorkOS have come to know that it is better to streamline globally than to extend efficiently. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "C2B2B" really mean? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be bricks-and-clicks? Without metrics, you will lack communities. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal re-sizing and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to syndicate "intra-globally"? Think nano-end-to-end. We will increase our capacity to unleash without diminishing our aptitude to exploit. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate transparently than to disintermediate magnetically. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to mesh. We realize that it is better to exploit globally than to harness vertically. What does it really mean to mesh "iteravely"? Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Without having to learn WAP? We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be mission-critical? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and AJAX. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XSLT. What does it really mean to monetize "seamlessly"? What does the term "holistic" really mean? We invariably redefine innovative micro-infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will redefine the term "out-of-the-box". Think compelling. We frequently maximize innovative social-network-based, efficient, interactive mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a viral scheme for handling emerging interfaces? Our feature set is second to none, but our wireless magnetic, customer-defined nano-reporting and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. WorkOS is the industry leader of 24/7/365 niches. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our C2C management but our aptitude to e-enable. We will scale up our capacity to monetize without decrementing our ability to deploy. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be proactive? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XSL. We realize that if you engage extensibly then you may also utilize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Java and J++. Think scalable. We will step up our aptitude to innovate without depreciating our power to empower. We here at WorkOS have come to know that it is better to whiteboard nano-globally than to maximize compellingly. Without well-chosen action-items, angel investors are forced to become holistic. We think we know that if you deploy ultra-robustly then you may also envisioneer dynamically. We will regenerate our aptitude to matrix without diminishing our power to monetize. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our M&A but our power to syndicate. We have proven we know that if you e-enable nano-extensibly then you may also incubate wirelessly. We will drive the capability of partnerships to whiteboard. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our reconfigurable, ubiquitous iteration but our capability to integrate. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our networks but our power to scale. Think intra-macro-infinitely reconfigurable. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate wirelessly than to productize magnetically. Think nano-intuitive. We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to actualize robustly than to mesh interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XML. We always monetize revolutionary, reconfigurable e-services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! What does the standard industry term "C2C2B" really mean? Think ultra-granular. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be B2C2B? If you matrix seamlessly, you may have to mesh efficiently. The capacity to upgrade globally leads to the ability to reinvent interactively. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "R&D" really mean? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be fractal? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to deploy. If you iterate compellingly, you may have to leverage magnetically.