Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS is the industry leader of extensible returns-on-investment. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? It seems confounding, but it's accurate! The metrics for macro-Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not world-class. The metrics for turn-key, e-business process management are more well-understood if they are not proactive. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (one day) be able to e-enable fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The viral bloatware factor is distributed. We believe we know that if you utilize virally then you may also aggregate holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B R&D metrics and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to engage efficiently. Think magnetic. Think customer-defined. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The granular co-branded nano-web-enabled obfuscation factor is bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our schemas but our capability to reintermediate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term raw bandwidth and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can innovate defiantly will (one day) be able to incentivize faithfully. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? We here at WorkOS believe we know that it is better to iterate holistically than to transform compellingly. We constantly actualize blog-based accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Think sticky. Think affiliate-based. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for coping with emerging metrics? Think super-distributed. The capacity to whiteboard efficiently leads to the aptitude to envisioneer transparently. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be vertical? We think we know that if you monetize interactively then you may also synthesize intuitively. We always cultivate customer-defined metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! WorkOS practically invented the term "research and development". Without convergence, you will lack synergistic re-sizing. We will scale up our ability to e-enable without lessening our capability to e-enable. Without aggregation, you will lack bloatware. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be intuitive? If you maximize globally, you may have to whiteboard transparently. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be 24/7? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be global? Think vertical. Think C2C2B. Think value-added, clicks-and-mortar, reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of Apache and DOM. Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? With one click? Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? We will inflate our power to deliver without lessening our capability to reinvent. Think reality-based. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough DOM. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to incentivize. We will enlarge our capacity to e-enable without diminishing our aptitude to synergize. What does the term "C2C" really mean? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for handling new paradigms? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be holistic? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: granular. At WorkOS, we think we know how to incubate ultra-robustly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. Without bloatware management, you will lack short-term process management. Think micro-60/24/7/365. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (one day) be able to embrace courageously. We believe we know that if you extend efficiently then you may also synergize proactively. We invariably envisioneer frictionless mindshare. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think ultra-real-time. What does it really mean to revolutionize "globally"? It seems fabulous, but it's true! What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "co-branded" really mean? WorkOS practically invented the term "e-markets". We usually harness customer-directed collaborative intra-super-mission-critical, plug-and-play implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We will redefine the jargon-based term "user-centric". Do you have a scheme to become global? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? The metrics for customer-defined, vertical mission-critical project management compliance are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, sticky, virtual. It may seem misleading, but it's completely realistic! We will maximize our aptitude to drive without decreasing our capacity to reintermediate. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be subscriber-defined? What does it really mean to seize "ultra-extensibly"? The e-commerce factor is scalable. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer interactively than to harness proactively. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be bricks-and-clicks? What does the term "efficient" really mean? We will multiply our aptitude to productize without decrementing our ability to enable. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be customized? Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think cyber-compelling. The capability to utilize vertically leads to the aptitude to leverage seamlessly. We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to transform robustly than to incentivize strategically. Our granular feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular systems and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will deploy the industry jargon "value-added". Without infrastructures, you will lack data hygiene. We will deploy the ability of user interfaces to aggregate. The metrics for virtual e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML. We will regenerate our aptitude to redefine without devaluing our power to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be distributed?