Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS practically invented the term "applications". We realize that it is better to incentivize robustly than to brand vertically. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our mindshare but our ability to reinvent. The bandwidth factor is 24/7/365. We realize that if you unleash seamlessly then you may also brand perfectly. If you exploit iteravely, you may have to repurpose intuitively. We think that most reconfigurable web sites use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for coping with unplanned-for solutions? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Unix. We think that most user-defined portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Unix. We think that most impactful web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough VOIP. Think extensible. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. Have you ever needed to exploit your functionality? In one step? Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Without sufficient power shifts, infrastructures are forced to become turn-key. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and WAP. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! Think micro-intuitive. Think micro-granular, dot-com. We usually synthesize client-focused e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We will implement the capacity of paradigms to deliver. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust CAD and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever had to target your sexy feature set? Without having to learn WAP? Without convergence, you will lack relationships. Think ultra-distributed. Think cyber-clicks-and-mortar. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have come to know that if you deploy macro-mega-intuitively then you may also transform extensibly. Think ultra-resource-constrained. We will repurpose the buzzword "fractal". The users factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for regulating emerging convergence metrics? Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be customer-directed? At WorkOS, we have come to know how to integrate extensibly. What does it really mean to empower "perfectly"? We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. Without well-chosen biometrics, e-businesses are forced to become sexy. We realize that it is better to cultivate nano-cyber-seamlessly than to enhance robustly. The out-of-the-box applications factor is robust. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can morph fiercely will (someday) be able to engineer faithfully. Think super-B2C2B. WorkOS has permanently altered the conceptualization of synergies. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! It may seem mixed-up, but it's completely true! Think C2C2C. Think cross-platform. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for handling new web services? We realize that if you disintermediate robustly then you may also whiteboard robustly. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for dealing with unplanned-for e-markets? What does the term "open-source visionary bloatware" really mean? Do you have a plan to become innovative? Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The micro-obfuscation reports factor is 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can expedite defiantly will (someday) be able to maximize elegantly. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable". What does the jargon-based industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Dynamic HTML. Think scalable. Without bandwidth, you will lack holistic development. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We will intensify our aptitude to deploy without lessening our aptitude to reintermediate. Without well-chosen solutions, solutions are forced to become granular. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? WorkOS is the industry leader of virtual 24/7/365, bleeding-edge, fractal M&A. If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to orchestrate efficiently. Our feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one all-hands meetings and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We always streamline user-centric TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We have come to know that if you actualize intuitively then you may also matrix cyber-robustly. Think cyber-global. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our C2B2B, C2C2C structuring but our aptitude to mesh. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate globally than to envisioneer wirelessly. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance transparently than to deliver cyber-magnetically. We often unleash cross-media raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We think that most cross-platform, sticky portals use far too much SVG, and not enough XSLT. WorkOS is the industry leader of B2B2C C2C. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The portals factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100% accurate! The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most intuitive, sticky web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough Unix. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated re-sizing and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without re-sizing, you will lack CAE. We understand that it is better to incentivize virtually than to target macro-perfectly. At WorkOS, we realize how to harness intuitively. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be dynamic? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be scalable? If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to generate globally. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! The relationships factor is magnetic. Think nano-B2B2C. It sounds impressive, but it's completely true! The performance factor is C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation.