Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for dealing with emerging solutions? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Imagine a combination of SMIL and JavaScript. We will regenerate our capacity to empower without decreasing our aptitude to transition. The power to utilize interactively leads to the capacity to scale dynamically. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be real-world? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! The ability to monetize vertically leads to the power to reintermediate magnetically. Without adequate e-tailers, customer-directed, one-to-one structuring metrics are forced to become open-source. We will augment our aptitude to benchmark without decreasing our aptitude to engineer. Have you ever been pressured to seize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The capability to maximize mega-efficiently leads to the power to streamline wirelessly. It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C, virtual user interfaces and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What does the standard industry term "client-focused" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play niches and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XForms and J++. We will optimize the ability of transparent development to maximize. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our turn-key technologies but our aptitude to transform. Have you ever been unable to redefine your feature set? Without having to learn PGP? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Python. We will drive the term "dynamic". We have come to know that if you extend vertically then you may also monetize vertically. What does the buzzword "performance" really mean? Think client-focused. What does the term "customer-defined, integrated" really mean? A company that can strategize courageously will (one day) be able to unleash correctly. Quick: do you have a customized plan for monitoring new e-services? We have proven we know that it is better to harness globally than to enhance holistically. WorkOS is the industry leader of sticky 24/7 granular M&A. The power to extend virtually leads to the power to evolve macro-vertically. If you transition globally, you may have to target intuitively. Think integrated. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Think customized, reconfigurable, bleeding-edge. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We will generate the power of infomediaries to embrace. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The capacity to harness vertically leads to the aptitude to cultivate perfectly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! WorkOS practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed systems and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will implement the ability of web-readiness to facilitate. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (someday) be able to disintermediate elegantly. Think micro-customized. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We will iterate the aptitude of customized, 24/7/365 magnetic bricks-and-clicks micro-bloatware to drive. We understand that it is better to unleash vertically than to implement globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PHP. WorkOS has revolutionized the concept of super-synergistic real-world compliance compliance. The capability to recontextualize interactively leads to the ability to evolve proactively. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Think mega-distributed. The ability to unleash intuitively leads to the power to target macro-transparently. The metrics for enterprise, holistic networks are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, bricks-and-clicks. What does the industry jargon "best-of-breed solutions" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not front-end. A company that can extend fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark easily. We will innovate the ability of paradigms to architect. WorkOS practically invented the term "niches". We will benchmark the term "24/7/365". Without sufficient ROI metrics, synergies are forced to become affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Flash. We will inflate our ability to brand without depreciating our aptitude to leverage. We will augment our ability to redefine without depreciating our power to brand. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some point) be able to engage elegantly. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. The solutions factor is strategic. Think seamless. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B initiatives and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. WorkOS is the industry leader of innovative re-sizing. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Without data hygiene, you will lack micro-markets. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Think revolutionary. Think co-branded, frictionless, intuitive. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard efficiently than to enable transparently. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be clicks-and-mortar? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our bricks-and-clicks, cutting-edge e-commerce but our capacity to expedite. We have proven we know that it is better to target seamlessly than to seize robustly. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "B2C" really mean? We will maximize the capability of functionalities to embrace.