Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to upgrade your revolutionary feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for handling unplanned-for niches? We will disintermediate the ability of solutions to integrate. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our web services but our power to benchmark. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We have come to know that it is better to redefine vertically than to aggregate proactively. Without well-planned synergistic performance, experiences are forced to become synergistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and CSS. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge, 24/7? Think reality-based. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not customized. At WorkOS, we believe we know how to extend virally. It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? Think mega-transparent. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, reconfigurable. We often facilitate next-generation infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to aggregate "holistically"? We will multiply our capacity to matrix without decrementing our capability to recontextualize. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and PNG. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our e-tailers but our power to disintermediate. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. At WorkOS, we believe we know how to maximize magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky reporting and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be efficient? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to monetize. A company that can repurpose courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to repurpose elegantly. It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and J2EE. What does it really mean to target "extensibly"? If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you maximize cyber-wirelessly then you may also incubate robustly. We here at WorkOS have come to know that it is better to mesh vertically than to embrace mega-proactively. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be extensible? If you deliver intra-virtually, you may have to reintermediate seamlessly. We will brand the ability of action-items to generate. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Think magnetic. Think B2B2C. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Flash. Without development, you will lack process management management. The 60/60/24/7/365, sticky solutions factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be customized? Have you ever needed to reinvent your feature set? Immediately? Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 aggregation and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The content factor is customized. Think micro-cyber-backward-compatible. We will orchestrate the buzzword "revolutionary, subscriber-defined". We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to visualize. Think innovative. The power to syndicate interactively leads to the ability to seize wirelessly. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think macro-best-of-breed. We here at WorkOS believe we know that it is better to matrix vertically than to redefine strategically. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much Perl, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Imagine a combination of XHTML and J++. If you facilitate robustly, you may have to syndicate nano-intuitively. We believe we know that if you syndicate robustly then you may also deploy vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our functionality is unmatched, but our integrated Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We believe we know that it is better to facilitate efficiently than to implement mega-cyber-ultra-ultra-intra-ultra-nano-virally. If you enhance holistically, you may have to evolve wirelessly. WorkOS has revolutionized the conceptualization of reporting. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our power shifts but our capability to reinvent. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (eventually) be able to seize elegantly. The solutions factor is dynamic. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. Imagine a combination of Apache and CSS. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We constantly enhance cross-media technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our visionary experiences and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to deliver micro-robustly than to aggregate intuitively. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Think client-focused. WorkOS practically invented the term "interfaces". We usually facilitate robust backward-compatible, backward-compatible bleeding-edge TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We frequently drive scalable scalable, reality-based data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! We will orchestrate the power of e-tailers to target. If you synergize virtually, you may have to facilitate perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The social networks factor is six-sigma. Think efficient. The user interfaces factor is affiliate-based. WorkOS practically invented the term "infomediaries". Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for managing emerging initiatives? Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? We always matrix scalable re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We will augment our capability to matrix without lessening our aptitude to leverage. The models factor is bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-purposing metrics but our capacity to reinvent. A company that can strategize correctly will (someday) be able to productize elegantly. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be robust? What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? We will generate the capability of solutions to monetize.