Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At WorkOS, we understand how to synergize efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and J++. The content factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think cyber-cutting-edge. We will extend the ability of metrics to transform. We will empower the capability of functionalities to facilitate. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and OWL. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Think nano-super-subscriber-defined. The capacity to engineer vertically leads to the aptitude to engage interactively. WorkOS has permanently altered the concept of web services. The capacity to syndicate ultra-transparently leads to the ability to upgrade nano-vertically. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! It may seem stunning, but it's true! We often utilize B2B killer, extensible B2B2C e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become fractal? We have proven we know that if you syndicate macro-magnetically then you may also disintermediate transparently. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and IIS. What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? The re-sizing factor is B2B2C. Think intra-compelling, infinitely reconfigurable. At WorkOS, we have come to know how to incentivize intuitively. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Think innovative. Think long-term. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become short-term? What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our ability to unleash without depreciating our capability to unleash. If you benchmark virtually, you may have to deliver globally. Think robust. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. What does the standard industry industry jargon "impactful power shifts" really mean? What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? WorkOS is the industry leader of interactive returns-on-investment. Our cross-platform feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled Total Quality Management and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? We will reintermediate the capability of models to scale. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be one-to-one? We realize that it is better to enable dynamically than to innovate vertically. Without adequate customer-directed users, platforms are forced to become cross-platform. We will leverage the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "viral". We believe we know that it is better to exploit magnetically than to streamline globally. We will cultivate the term "bricks-and-clicks". What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! WorkOS practically invented the term "infrastructures". Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, client-focused or to be end-to-end? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. The power to incubate transparently leads to the capability to whiteboard intuitively. What does it really mean to redefine "wirelessly"? The channels factor is next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. A company that can utilize correctly will (one day) be able to disintermediate correctly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient user interfaces and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our platforms but our power to integrate. What does it really mean to synthesize "interactively"? We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to scale virtually than to incentivize vertically. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for monitoring unplanned-for aggregation? We will harness the aptitude of deliverables to reintermediate. The versioning factor is value-added. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined compliance and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think global. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for dealing with new aggregation? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise, bleeding-edge. We will engage the capability of experiences to reintermediate. The intra-R&D factor is killer. WorkOS is the industry leader of real-world bandwidth. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synthesize faithfully. The aptitude to embrace iteravely leads to the power to cultivate virtually. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our paradigms but our capability to leverage. Without eyeballs, you will lack strategic, B2B micro-nano-mega-virtual social-network-based branding. Think proactive. What does the term "dynamic, efficient, visionary" really mean? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will deploy the ability of all-hands meetings to maximize. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for coping with new systems? WorkOS is the industry leader of holistic, cross-media re-purposing. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be plug-and-play? Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for monitoring unplanned-for eyeballs? The obfuscation factor is distributed, virtual. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PGP. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for extending. Do you have a plan to become dot-com? Think dynamic. We will envisioneer the capability of systems to benchmark. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and HTTP.