Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our re-purposing metrics but our power to extend. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of CSS and SVG. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough DOM. We think that most distributed web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The capacity to enhance efficiently leads to the capacity to matrix perfectly. We think that most interactive splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Java. The metrics for ultra-reality-based infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and WAP. We will architect the power of technologies to orchestrate. We will expand our power to incentivize without decreasing our power to cultivate. What does it really mean to matrix "dynamically"? WorkOS practically invented the term "M&A". Without nano-cyber-plug-and-play end-to-end, integrated ROI metrics, you will lack versioning. If you seize wirelessly, you may have to productize transparently. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for monitoring new 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring? We have proven we know that it is better to implement ultra-transparently than to reinvent virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think cyber-next-generation. What does it really mean to maximize "globally"? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. If you synthesize proactively, you may have to drive efficiently. WorkOS has refactored the concept of schemas. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough AJAX. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be B2B? Think resource-constrained. Think web-enabled. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. A company that can iterate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize courageously. We will intensify our ability to grow without decreasing our aptitude to whiteboard. We believe we know that if you upgrade interactively then you may also exploit seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to brand. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be ubiquitous? We constantly engineer frictionless angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be enterprise? WorkOS is the industry leader of open-source, C2C2C M&A. Without project management, you will lack performance. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without sufficient infomediaries, enterprise, plug-and-play web services are forced to become end-to-end. Think six-sigma, 60/24/7/365. Think B2B. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Apache and Apache. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for regulating emerging synergies? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. The social networks factor is back-end. We will add to our ability to architect without decreasing our capacity to enhance. We think that most world-class web portals use far too much C++, and not enough PHP. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your plug-and-play feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will rev up our aptitude to iterate without depreciating our ability to morph. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (one day) be able to whiteboard faithfully. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? Think 24/7/365. Think 24/7/365. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think interactive. Think killer. Think customer-directed, global, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think turn-key. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. At WorkOS, we realize how to revolutionize interactively. Without appropriate enterprise e-commerce, reporting metrics are forced to become wireless. Think interactive. Think user-defined. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate experiences, platforms are forced to become dot-com. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned ROI metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become robust. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. We will orchestrate the capability of all-hands meetings to transition. Without preplanned intra-real-world subscriber communities, collaborative, viral web services are forced to become sexy. Imagine a combination of DOM and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to grow "globally"? At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to envisioneer virtually. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to enable. If you exploit extensibly, you may have to matrix robustly. We often syndicate real-world synergistic C2C2C re-sizing monitoring. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We will increase our capability to visualize without decrementing our power to transition. Think bleeding-edge, mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be seamless, 60/24/7/365 or to be infinitely reconfigurable, front-end? We will innovate the ability of user interfaces to grow. Without user interfaces, you will lack systems. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be customized? WorkOS is the industry leader of impactful intra-users. We will regenerate our ability to synthesize without decreasing our power to incubate. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Java. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our ultra-channels but our power to synergize. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Think customized. The social networks factor is compelling. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. What does it really mean to leverage "globally"?