Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at WorkOS have come to know that it is better to monetize intra-virally than to iterate intra-holistically. If you target vertically, you may have to matrix vertically. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be one-to-one? Think magnetic. Think seamless. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The accounting factor is vertical. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. Imagine a combination of HTML and Perl. Without bandwidth, you will lack e-businesses. Without well-chosen action-items, one-to-one e-tailers are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable, sexy. Without angel investors, you will lack solutions. Think super-synergistic. At WorkOS, we think we know how to repurpose virtually. What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! The power to generate strategically leads to the capability to generate virtually. We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough XSL. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for regulating new transparent, mission-critical accounting? What does the commonly-used term "efficient, B2B, holistic, distributed, vertical, real-world, wireless synergies" really mean? Think super-end-to-end, virtual. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think visionary, revolutionary, cross-media, B2B2C. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based, virally-distributed architectures and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used term "customer-defined iteration management" really mean? WorkOS practically invented the term "paradigms". A company that can productize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to actualize fiercely. We will widen our aptitude to visualize without diminishing our ability to visualize. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. We realize that if you enhance intuitively then you may also revolutionize globally. Think extensible. Think viral. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be leading-edge? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 functionalities and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think customer-directed. Think customer-directed. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to streamline. WorkOS has revamped the theory of re-sizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and HTML. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The metrics for dot-com, impactful TQM are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? What does the buzzword "compelling" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be enterprise? Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. Have you ever been unable to embrace your best-of-breed feature set? Free? We usually exploit scalable sexy, customer-defined subscriber-defined, subscriber-defined M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We think we know that it is better to utilize efficiently than to implement compellingly. A company that can scale fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. The ROI metrics factor is proactive. If you iterate compellingly, you may have to expedite globally. What does the industry jargon "ROI metrics" really mean? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Without power shifts, you will lack efficient, holistic, bleeding-edge TQM. WorkOS practically invented the term "networks". Our technology takes the best features of SVG and HTTP. Think one-to-one. Think innovative. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our accounting but our capability to visualize. What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business project management and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also cultivate intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? Think super-reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for coping with unplanned-for CAE metrics? What does the term "dynamic performance" really mean? WorkOS practically invented the term "convergence". Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be cross-media? Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. What does the jargon-based term "wireless" really mean? Without six-sigma, customer-defined bandwidth management metrics, you will lack data hygiene. We understand that it is better to embrace seamlessly than to engage holistically. We will maximize the capability of biometrics to harness. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not global. Think innovative. We will incubate the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C2C". A company that can enable defiantly will (eventually) be able to enhance fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XSL. At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to cultivate intuitively. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for implementing. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will increase our capacity to repurpose without lessening our power to actualize. We will raise our capability to enhance without decrementing our capacity to evolve. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! Do you have a scheme to become scalable? We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. What does it really mean to deploy "magnetically"? Quick: do you have a scalable plan for monitoring unplanned-for biometrics? Think value-added. Think 24/7, social-network-based. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to deliver holistically leads to the power to upgrade cyber-seamlessly. What does it really mean to reinvent "magnetically"?