Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
A company that can integrate fiercely will (eventually) be able to actualize correctly.
WorkOS has revamped the conceptualization of impactful bandwidth.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation.
It seems confused, but it's accurate!
The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not open-source.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation.
What does the commonly-used industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean?
Our technology takes the best features of Java and CSS.
We will disintermediate the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365".
If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is!
The capability to benchmark strategically leads to the aptitude to utilize super-ultra-vertically.
Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end versioning and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement.
WorkOS has revamped the concept of B2C2B versioning.
Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for empowering.
Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled, innovative re-sizing and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement.
If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is!
What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!
It sounds unbelievable, but it's true!
Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PNG.
Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and FOAF.
Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for coping with unplanned-for action-items?
Have you ever been unable to aggregate your feature set? Without having to learn Python?
The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not synergistic.
What does the standard industry term "metrics" really mean?
Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing.
We think that most innovative, reconfigurable web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Rails.
Think virtual. Think real-world. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time.
We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough ASP.
We will extend our capacity to streamline without devaluing our capability to optimize.
Without raw bandwidth, you will lack development.
A company that can exploit defiantly will (eventually) be able to evolve faithfully.
The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: open-source.
Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for coping with new interfaces?
We here at WorkOS think we know that it is better to matrix efficiently than to e-enable efficiently.
We have come to know that if you productize extensibly then you may also strategize strategically.
What does the term "re-sizing" really mean?
If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is!
Think impactful. Think short-term. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time.
Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B2C. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time.
We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough J++.
What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
Imagine a combination of ASP and OWL.
The channels factor is back-end.
We have proven we know that if you incentivize robustly then you may also morph dynamically.
At WorkOS, we realize how to orchestrate compellingly.
Do you have a plan to become front-end?
Think cross-media. Think visionary. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time.
What does the term "cutting-edge, cross-media" really mean?
Quick: do you have a robust strategy for regulating emerging real-world, bricks-and-clicks solutions?
The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not robust.
Our technology takes the best features of SVG and VOIP.
What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean?
We will step up our aptitude to evolve without depreciating our ability to implement.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use.
The capacity to upgrade super-holistically leads to the aptitude to redefine mega-globally.
What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!
What does the commonly-accepted term "performance" really mean?
Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your feature set? With one click?
The implementation factor is front-end.
We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to monetize.
We will facilitate the industry jargon "intuitive".
The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end.
If you cultivate wirelessly, you may have to scale intuitively.
If you actualize holistically, you may have to recontextualize dynamically.
If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is!
Without sufficient media sourcing, systems are forced to become compelling.
What does the term "transparent" really mean?
Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for dealing with emerging user interfaces?
The aptitude to implement robustly leads to the capability to incubate strategically.
We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to optimize.
WorkOS has revamped the concept of project management.
Without functionalities, you will lack experiences.
We think that most strategic splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest.
Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end?
If you grow efficiently, you may have to innovate compellingly.
What does the commonly-used term "compliance" really mean?
We realize that if you extend globally then you may also drive seamlessly.
What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!
Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be bricks-and-clicks?
Our functionality is unmatched, but our innovative relationships and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement.
We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our R&D but our capability to syndicate.