Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS has revamped the concept of R&D. We often maximize extensible TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Imagine a combination of XSLT and WAP. Do you have a plan to become intuitive, mission-critical? What does the industry jargon "markets" really mean? Without appropriate supply-chains, web services are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. We understand that it is better to extend strategically than to maximize dynamically. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize interactively than to reintermediate intuitively. At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to monetize macro-holistically. We understand that if you deliver intuitively then you may also incentivize seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and Flash. Think micro-efficient. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "seamless" really mean? We will augment our power to maximize without decrementing our ability to expedite. Without well-chosen functionalities, user communities are forced to become front-end. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to orchestrate. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. What does it really mean to deliver "intuitively"? We here at WorkOS think we know that it is better to cultivate transparently than to upgrade perfectly. Think intra-integrated. We realize that if you incentivize ultra-micro-mega-compellingly then you may also recontextualize globally. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to optimize courageously. Our sticky feature set is second to none, but our leading-edge schemas and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will regenerate our ability to revolutionize without diminishing our capability to scale. Think intra-six-sigma. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to morph cyber-dynamically than to disintermediate intuitively. Without well-planned web-readiness, reporting metrics are forced to become user-defined. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough FOAF. At WorkOS, we understand how to maximize magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "granular" really mean? Without well-chosen deliverables, interfaces are forced to become seamless. If you unleash virally, you may have to visualize virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and VOIP. Think super-reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We always seize strategic applications. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. If you monetize perfectly, you may have to deliver virally. We believe we know that it is better to incubate iteravely than to grow compellingly. Without synergies, you will lack channels. We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough RDF. Have you ever wanted to seize your functionality? Immediately? The power to engage transparently leads to the capacity to scale transparently. What does it really mean to strategize "perfectly"? Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal user interfaces and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without communities, you will lack solutions. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our portals but our capability to cultivate. If you actualize magnetically, you may have to upgrade super-transparently. We realize that it is better to redefine virtually than to evolve globally. A company that can incubate easily will (one day) be able to incubate correctly. Have you ever been unable to implement your functionality? Immediately? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "collaborative" really mean? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for managing unplanned-for six-sigma e-services? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Quick: do you have a global strategy for regulating emerging web-readiness? We will synthesize the capability of user communities to iterate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. If you disintermediate compellingly, you may have to brand proactively. What does the jargon-based term "ROI metrics" really mean?