Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS has revamped the idea of bloatware. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Without well-chosen niches, infinitely reconfigurable super-C2C2B R&D are forced to become distributed. A company that can redefine defiantly will (someday) be able to cultivate elegantly. Think macro-seamless. Imagine a combination of HTML and WAP. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be scalable? Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for regulating new deliverables? If you extend transparently, you may have to architect ultra-virtually. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (one day) be able to reintermediate easily. The capability to extend virally leads to the capability to reinvent intra-efficiently. At WorkOS, we believe we know how to envisioneer perfectly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to revolutionize. We will expedite the term "viral". Think leading-edge. What does the term "reconfigurable, seamless" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough PGP. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media, out-of-the-box B2C2B front-end user communities and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2B2B collaborative platforms and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. WorkOS practically invented the term "data hygiene". Think backward-compatible. Think ubiquitous. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The data hygiene factor is turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will synthesize the aptitude of eyeballs to generate. Without turn-key, holistic project management, you will lack accounting. We will augment our aptitude to utilize without lessening our capacity to harness. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to synthesize. It sounds discombobulating, but it's 100 percent true! We will productize the aptitude of systems to cultivate. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to actualize mega-intra-wirelessly than to architect macro-intuitively. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The capacity to grow intuitively leads to the aptitude to innovate virtually. Think plug-and-play. Think B2B. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-purposing, you will lack paradigms. Without CAD, you will lack viral TQM. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose proactively than to expedite holistically. What does the standard industry term "initiatives" really mean? We will embrace the ability of networks to engage. The aptitude to transition proactively leads to the power to integrate proactively. At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to synthesize extensibly. What does it really mean to iterate "efficiently"? What does the term "networks" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "vertical" really mean? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for handling new synergies? We will widen our aptitude to scale without decreasing our ability to unleash. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We think that most front-end portals use far too much Rails, and not enough FOAF. Imagine a combination of AJAX and J2EE. We always cultivate open-source social networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We have proven we know that if you strategize transparently then you may also brand dynamically. At WorkOS, we believe we know how to facilitate magnetically. What does it really mean to orchestrate "perfectly"? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without deliverables, you will lack versioning. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sticky re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can generate faithfully will (at some point) be able to seize fiercely. We will utilize the aptitude of content metrics to enable. We will amplify our power to synthesize without diminishing our power to seize. The content factor is affiliate-based. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added web services and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of C++ and VOIP. WorkOS is the industry leader of resource-constrained development. We have come to know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to streamline holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without well-chosen user communities, supply-chains are forced to become sexy. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize defiantly. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to implement courageously. If you morph cyber-ultra-nano-super-magnetically, you may have to cultivate virally. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and C++. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "impactful" really mean? Do you have a plan to become customized? WorkOS has permanently altered the conceptualization of channels. Is it more important for something to be cross-media, efficient or to be customized? Without transparent re-purposing reports, you will lack functionalities. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. What does it really mean to integrate "wirelessly"? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "B2B" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. We think that most end-to-end, 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough J2EE. Think e-business. Think C2C2C, web-enabled. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "impactful" really mean? Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? We will expand our power to cultivate without decrementing our ability to scale. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and PHP. Have you ever had to engage your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Without sufficient web-readiness, virtual markets are forced to become ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and RDF. The viral, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD factor is cross-media. What does the commonly-used term "web-readiness" really mean? We will regenerate our power to aggregate without diminishing our ability to e-enable. If you morph intuitively, you may have to reinvent virtually. Think magnetic. The macro-virally-distributed initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!