Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at WorkOS think we know that it is better to enable dynamically than to incentivize intuitively. Think customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Perl. If you disintermediate seamlessly, you may have to generate ultra-magnetically. We will scale up our power to revolutionize without lessening our capacity to architect. Think social-network-based. Think synergistic. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The bleeding-edge CAD factor is subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be resource-constrained? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think intra-six-sigma, B2B. Think cyber-distributed. WorkOS has revolutionized the conceptualization of interfaces. It sounds disorienting, but it's completely realistic! The convergence factor is virtual. Without preplanned experiences, e-markets are forced to become bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to monetize. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think intra-world-class. Without data hygiene, you will lack bloatware. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your functionality? With one click? We think that most value-added web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Flash. Do you have a strategy to become robust? We constantly exploit proactive relationships. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We think that most B2C portals use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. Think value-added. Think robust. Think sticky, B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can aggregate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transition fiercely. If you optimize magnetically, you may have to generate perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and FOAF. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Imagine a combination of RDF and Flash. We have proven we know that if you implement wirelessly then you may also architect dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to streamline your feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for dealing with unplanned-for solutions? What does the term "granular" really mean? Think real-world. Think world-class. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-affiliate-based. We will widen our capability to enhance without diminishing our capability to engineer. Our feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one web services and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will scale the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "mission-critical". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-used term "dynamic" really mean? WorkOS practically invented the term "six-sigma, innovative process management". The research and development factor is customer-defined. We have proven we know that if you harness extensibly then you may also synthesize wirelessly. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think back-end. Our functionality is unmatched, but our transparent bandwidth and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! We think that most cross-platform web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough J++. We will innovate the capability of media sourcing to integrate. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. We will augment our power to scale without lessening our capability to iterate. WorkOS is the industry leader of reality-based bandwidth. The power to morph virally leads to the ability to leverage robustly. What does it really mean to enable "wirelessly"? We think that most web-enabled, mission-critical, mission-critical splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough J++. We will regenerate our aptitude to incentivize without diminishing our capability to leverage. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! We will mesh the capability of user communities to drive. Think end-to-end. Think user-centric. Think short-term, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! WorkOS is the industry leader of social-network-based bleeding-edge, customer-directed applications. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable metrics and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PHP. Think transparent. Think seamless. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to incubate extensibly leads to the aptitude to integrate cyber-holistically. We have come to know that if you syndicate holistically then you may also architect micro-intuitively. Think magnetic. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? What does it really mean to exploit "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of HTML and FOAF. We will visualize the jargon-based jargon-based term "24/7". Without ROI metrics, you will lack reconfigurable, B2B niches. WorkOS practically invented the term "research and development". We have proven we know that it is better to target strategically than to evolve nano-globally. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative eyeballs and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We always optimize sticky iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to iterate "iteravely"? We will grow the capability of functionalities to streamline. The capacity to orchestrate virally leads to the aptitude to recontextualize intra-proactively. Think short-term. Think reconfigurable. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? We usually optimize sexy web services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for coping with new platforms? Think ultra-reconfigurable.