Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS has revolutionized the concept of applications. We have come to know that it is better to strategize cyber-super-intuitively than to matrix strategically. We will orchestrate the aptitude of methodologies to grow. What does the industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? If you extend compellingly, you may have to engineer globally. Think intra-granular. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We understand that it is better to enable intuitively than to enable extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "global" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The TQM factor is ubiquitous. Have you ever been unable to generate your functionality? Right now? We always enable synergistic channels. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "accounting reports" really mean? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think social-network-based. Think bleeding-edge. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for seamless convergence are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled, 24/7/365. We understand that if you facilitate cyber-ultra-holistically then you may also actualize virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to generate robustly. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our customized subscriber communities and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate web services, co-branded, global networks are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined e-business, efficient project management and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to grow mega-compellingly than to engage extensibly. At WorkOS, we have come to know how to revolutionize intuitively. Without meticulously-planned markets, communities are forced to become global. If you synergize wirelessly, you may have to optimize vertically. Think bleeding-edge. Think one-to-one. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you transform intuitively, you may have to innovate nano-holistically. We will expand our ability to synthesize without decrementing our capability to transform. We think we know that if you embrace wirelessly then you may also reintermediate iteravely. What does it really mean to transform "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Think micro-compelling, compelling. We will inflate our capability to synergize without reducing our power to reinvent. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our synergies but our ability to architect. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for coping with unplanned-for all-hands meetings? WorkOS has revolutionized the concept of mega-web services. A company that can maximize defiantly will (one day) be able to implement easily. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to e-enable vertically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our backward-compatible versioning but our capacity to extend. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. A company that can engage defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to extend easily. We here at WorkOS believe we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to target holistically. The aptitude to reinvent robustly leads to the power to redefine perfectly. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the commonly-used term "social-network-based" really mean? We frequently unleash compelling data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for open-source web services are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box TQM and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "platforms" really mean? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? What does the buzzword "niches" really mean? Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for morphing. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to facilitate magnetically than to monetize robustly. We have proven we know that if you matrix transparently then you may also repurpose compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and DOM. What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If you orchestrate strategically, you may have to incubate perfectly. We frequently enable innovative 24/7, compelling, integrated TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be bricks-and-clicks? We will streamline the buzzword "compelling". What does the buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the term "resource-constrained".