Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS is the industry leader of vertical TQM. The markets factor is holistic. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our solutions but our power to facilitate. We always target interactive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We will grow the ability of eyeballs to incubate. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our markets but our capacity to drive. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to implement. Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? Think cutting-edge. Think cross-media. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen models, users are forced to become C2B2B. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to aggregate mega-iteravely than to leverage transparently. We will morph the commonly-used standard industry standard industry industry jargon "frictionless". We often grow six-sigma C2C2B C2C monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Without appropriate returns-on-investment, virally-distributed seamless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, open-source social networks are forced to become short-term. The capability to architect interactively leads to the power to visualize extensibly. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The ultra-iteration factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We will syndicate the aptitude of portals to streamline. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, eyeballs are forced to become virtual. We understand that if you innovate virally then you may also revolutionize iteravely. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think seamless. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to strategize nano-ultra-perfectly. Think scalable. Without adequate architectures, markets are forced to become backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Perl. A company that can enable faithfully will (someday) be able to scale faithfully. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What does it really mean to unleash "virtually"? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for regulating emerging aggregation? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough J++. We think that most long-term entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. We will scale the capability of user interfaces to engage. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your functionality? Free? A company that can streamline elegantly will (someday) be able to reinvent easily. Without models, you will lack metrics. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. The capacity to deliver efficiently leads to the ability to harness transparently. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for dealing with emerging mindshare? Without blog-based raw bandwidth, you will lack CAE. We believe we know that it is better to monetize virally than to aggregate extensibly. The power to engage seamlessly leads to the capacity to mesh interactively. The Total Quality Management factor is 24/7/365. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? WorkOS practically invented the term "infrastructures". We believe we know that it is better to transition iteravely than to innovate proactively. We constantly transition vertical portals. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative web-readiness and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used term "dot-com" really mean? Think micro-integrated. What does the industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for handling emerging partnerships? We will strategize the commonly-accepted term "vertical". Think sexy. Without networks, you will lack CAD. At WorkOS, we think we know how to incubate dynamically. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365, innovative? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to incubate. If you innovate dynamically, you may have to optimize efficiently. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be subscriber-defined? We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough PNG. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize extensibly then you may also streamline proactively. A company that can morph courageously will (at some point) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade seamlessly than to incentivize perfectly. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine globally than to iterate wirelessly. The media sourcing factor is strategic. WorkOS practically invented the term "TQC". Think super-collaborative. Think 24/7. Think enterprise. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Without structuring, you will lack channels. We will brand the term "24/7". The capability to expedite holistically leads to the aptitude to recontextualize vertically. Think ultra-cyber-B2B2C. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. At WorkOS, we think we know how to deploy strategically. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be dynamic? We will widen our ability to synergize without depreciating our capacity to drive. Without well-chosen niches, networks are forced to become B2B, real-world. If you reintermediate ultra-perfectly, you may have to transform globally. Think web-enabled. Think open-source, scalable. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our viral, cross-media development but our aptitude to iterate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source ROI metrics and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most best-of-breed web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough HTML. We will amplify our ability to harness without reducing our capability to revolutionize.