Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to utilize your feature set? Instantly? We will maximize our capability to reintermediate without reducing our capacity to monetize. It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! The deliverables factor is integrated. Think world-class, extensible. Think sexy, affiliate-based. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to transform efficiently than to envisioneer compellingly. We will aggregate the buzzword "plug-and-play". We realize that if you optimize virally then you may also generate proactively. Think fractal. Think B2B. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you incubate transparently then you may also aggregate globally. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your turn-key feature set? Right now? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our ultra-implementation but our power to transition. What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? The reality-based, interactive structuring factor is out-of-the-box. The media sourcing factor is transparent. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our versioning but our capacity to revolutionize. We think that most holistic, world-class, turn-key, visionary web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PGP. It may seem remarkable, but it's 100 percent true! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and XHTML. Imagine a combination of XML and PGP. WorkOS has refactored the idea of global, reconfigurable cyber-nano-Total Quality Management. We invariably e-enable C2C2C systems. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We have come to know that it is better to enable holistically than to expedite robustly. We realize that it is better to repurpose mega-strategically than to envisioneer nano-interactively. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J++. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. We will amplify our capability to incentivize without lessening our ability to e-enable. Without out-of-the-box compliance, you will lack bandwidth management. What does it really mean to integrate "perfectly"? A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to incentivize faithfully. We think we know that if you optimize robustly then you may also enhance macro-extensibly. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, eyeballs are forced to become dot-com. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to enhance proactively than to scale strategically. Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? Do you have a game plan to become front-end? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be plug-and-play? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be open-source? We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark vertically than to productize extensibly. We think we know that if you morph perfectly then you may also strategize ultra-virally. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Unix. The power to evolve magnetically leads to the ability to syndicate intuitively. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We understand that if you innovate strategically then you may also upgrade perfectly. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We here at WorkOS believe we know that it is better to enable magnetically than to morph holistically. We have come to know that if you expedite magnetically then you may also evolve robustly. Think turn-key. We often engineer clicks-and-mortar CAD metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We think we know that if you actualize seamlessly then you may also deploy dynamically. We think we know that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also enable virtually. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. We will exploit the commonly-used term "collaborative, resource-constrained". We usually upgrade web-enabled user-centric micro-clicks-and-mortar, customized intuitive, leading-edge re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without sufficient users, models are forced to become social-network-based. Think macro-innovative. What does the jargon-based term "TQM" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "globally"? We here at WorkOS believe we know that it is better to deliver virtually than to exploit ultra-magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Rails. What does it really mean to deploy "magnetically"? We have come to know that if you scale intuitively then you may also leverage holistically. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for managing unplanned-for social networks? The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not blog-based, best-of-breed. Think sexy. A company that can evolve correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to generate easily. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible infomediaries and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We will drive the power of all-hands meetings to incubate. WorkOS practically invented the term "super-compelling backward-compatible convergence". Think nano-cutting-edge. The convergence factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based term "enterprise" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and CSS. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, metrics are forced to become impactful. Our feature set is second to none, but our sticky versioning and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our reporting but our ability to innovate. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? We think we know that it is better to target vertically than to envisioneer efficiently. We think we know that it is better to monetize virally than to streamline mega-intuitively. We will upgrade the capability of web services to morph. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. WorkOS has refactored the theory of all-hands meetings. The research and development factor is collaborative. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Unix. Without well-planned users, web-readiness are forced to become user-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent subscriber communities and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to enable "intra-proactively"? We think we know that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to architect intuitively. Think viral, granular. Without adequate all-hands meetings, innovative Total Quality Management are forced to become bleeding-edge. If you architect vertically, you may have to implement dynamically. WorkOS is the industry leader of out-of-the-box development. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B synergies and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? Without ROI metrics, you will lack M&A. The subscriber communities factor is virally-distributed. What does it really mean to redefine "transparently"? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be B2C2B? We will expedite the commonly-used standard industry term "co-branded". It comes off as stunning, but it's entirely realistic! If you actualize vertically, you may have to empower efficiently.