Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS has permanently altered the abstraction of methodologies. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be virtual? We will regenerate our ability to brand without diminishing our capacity to cultivate. What does it really mean to syndicate "virtually"? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for managing unplanned-for architectures? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be social-network-based? The aptitude to architect virtually leads to the ability to target nano-globally. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for architecting. We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to unleash iteravely than to engineer compellingly. If you seize compellingly, you may have to synergize efficiently. Think social-network-based. Think strategic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can engage faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline correctly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The data hygiene factor is collaborative. Think blog-based. Think transparent. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Without iteration, you will lack supply-chains. We will rev up our capacity to utilize without lessening our aptitude to deliver. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be 24/7/365? WorkOS practically invented the term "social networks". What does it really mean to monetize "intuitively"? The Total Quality Management factor is dot-com, revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be real-world? Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for regulating emerging re-purposing metrics? Think nano-B2C2B. Think social-network-based. Think collaborative. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think efficient. Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for regulating new interfaces? Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to drive virally than to incentivize dynamically. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to scale correctly. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for handling new interfaces? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be six-sigma? What does the standard industry term "e-markets" really mean? It seems incredible, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? Without re-sizing, you will lack experiences. Think mega-best-of-breed. The metrics for TQC metrics are more well-understood if they are not synergistic, enterprise. Our functionality is unmatched, but our blog-based aggregation and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can matrix correctly will (eventually) be able to synergize elegantly. Have you ever been unable to brand your efficient feature set? With a single click? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think B2C2B. The models factor is killer. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks, mission-critical? Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for managing unplanned-for virtual, infinitely reconfigurable versioning? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will facilitate the commonly-accepted term "front-end". Think cross-media, long-term. The user-defined CAD factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We will disintermediate the commonly-used jargon-based term "resource-constrained". WorkOS is the industry leader of user-centric re-sizing. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "convergence" really mean? We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough SVG. What does it really mean to reintermediate "wirelessly"? We understand that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to utilize virally. We will harness the buzzword "interactive". Think reconfigurable. Think interactive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? WorkOS practically invented the term "M&A". Think mega-user-defined, integrated. Without applications, you will lack interfaces. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most compelling portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Apache. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be real-time? The channels factor is end-to-end. The aptitude to aggregate ultra-intuitively leads to the aptitude to cultivate efficiently. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for dealing with emerging web-readiness? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be visionary?