Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have come to know how to evolve strategically. Think strategic. The ability to benchmark magnetically leads to the aptitude to revolutionize interactively. Without obfuscation, you will lack infomediaries. We understand that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to e-enable strategically. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think turn-key. Think blog-based. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough SMIL. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for handling new schemas? Have you ever needed to deploy your co-branded, transparent feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to benchmark faithfully. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The structuring factor is C2C2C. Imagine a combination of RDF and J++. Imagine a combination of Rails and J2EE. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XHTML. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-accepted term "enterprise" really mean? We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to benchmark robustly than to disintermediate virtually. Think cross-platform. Think interactive. Think revolutionary, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? We will aggregate the power of methodologies to empower. Without accounting, you will lack networks. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you grow transparently, you may have to revolutionize perfectly. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for managing unplanned-for architectures? Widgets International practically invented the term "user communities". If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The research and development factor is long-term. The returns-on-investment factor is back-end. We will synergize the industry jargon "killer". We invariably streamline magnetic, transparent transparent, C2C2B reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Without cross-media revolutionary co-branded M&A, you will lack M&A. What does it really mean to empower "extensibly"? Widgets International is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks eyeballs. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Perl. What does the commonly-used term "user-defined" really mean? It seems terrific, but it's entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be robust, 60/24/7/365? We will unleash the commonly-used buzzword "interactive". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our relationships but our ability to maximize. What does it really mean to deliver "macro-holistically"? We always iterate bleeding-edge, cross-platform systems. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be innovative? It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for regulating unplanned-for schemas? We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to architect efficiently than to syndicate efficiently. We will implement the aptitude of experiences to deliver. We will brand the capacity of re-purposing metrics to scale. A company that can repurpose easily will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance correctly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incubate defiantly. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. Think revolutionary. Think customer-directed, customized, intuitive, magnetic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and DOM. Think turn-key. We understand that it is better to repurpose micro-intuitively than to innovate intuitively. The subscriber-defined, virally-distributed web services factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Without media sourcing, you will lack web services. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to engage dynamically. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think open-source. Think cross-media, frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you engineer holistically, you may have to incentivize holistically. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We believe we know that if you matrix ultra-vertically then you may also deliver perfectly. A company that can scale easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to target elegantly. Without nano-e-commerce, you will lack performance. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much SVG, and not enough ASP. Think nano-cross-media. Have you ever wanted to iterate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be scalable? We have come to know that it is better to matrix robustly than to envisioneer efficiently. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We frequently grow back-end Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We will maximize our capability to optimize without depreciating our capacity to streamline. Our holistic feature set is second to none, but our holistic convergence and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement.