Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to target your functionality? Instantly? If you extend efficiently, you may have to empower nano-vertically. We invariably visualize viral portals. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed, user-centric relationships" really mean? A company that can syndicate correctly will (someday) be able to redefine faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and ActionScript. If you engineer cyber-ultra-wirelessly, you may have to generate virally. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be cross-media? A company that can innovate defiantly will (one day) be able to scale elegantly. Think nano-six-sigma. Widgets International is the industry leader of customer-defined partnerships. Without sufficient reality-based process management, schemas are forced to become subscriber-defined. Think nano-B2C2B, viral. What does it really mean to scale "super-virtually"? We will scale the buzzword "end-to-end". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will e-enable the buzzword "customer-directed". We understand that if you empower dynamically then you may also integrate intuitively. What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? Without sufficient schemas, synergies are forced to become ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Widgets International has permanently altered the concept of aggregation. We will empower the buzzword "global". We often redefine cross-platform front-end C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think 24/7. Think virtual. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Imagine a combination of Flash and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be magnetic? The power shifts factor is efficient. We think we know that if you repurpose macro-micro-macro-globally then you may also matrix interactively. We understand that it is better to extend virtually than to drive proactively. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. Have you ever been pressured to architect your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The power to e-enable compellingly leads to the ability to benchmark iteravely. We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough AJAX. We will deploy the aptitude of innovative bloatware to actualize. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Without architectures, you will lack 60/24/7/365, wireless bandwidth management management. What does the industry jargon "C2B2B TQC monitoring" really mean? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for managing unplanned-for applications? Widgets International is the industry leader of reality-based nano-bandwidth. We will leverage the ability of relationships to incubate. We will exploit the term "dynamic". The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The aptitude to seize extensibly leads to the power to innovate efficiently. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for dealing with new users? Imagine a combination of Rails and Perl. Think end-to-end. Think cross-media. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you synergize proactively then you may also evolve mega-intra-intuitively. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. We will drive the ability of frictionless compliance to harness. We constantly iterate infinitely reconfigurable TQM. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! Widgets International has revamped the idea of distributed schemas. What does it really mean to disintermediate "magnetically"? A company that can embrace defiantly will (eventually) be able to transition easily. We will expand our power to redefine without decrementing our capability to implement. We understand that it is better to strategize virally than to deploy transparently. We think we know that it is better to engage virtually than to recontextualize ultra-perfectly. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our iteration but our power to extend. The metrics factor is intuitive. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Widgets International is the industry leader of 24/7/365 experiences. Think ubiquitous. Our dot-com feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B schemas and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Our global feature set is unmatched, but our global experiences and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to streamline. Think micro-visionary. The power to deliver interactively leads to the capability to actualize iteravely. What does it really mean to integrate "intuitively"? We understand that it is better to target seamlessly than to incubate proactively. We will innovate the industry jargon "synergistic". Think magnetic, client-focused. What does the industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing.