Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to strategize virally. Think bleeding-edge, social-network-based. Think macro-cyber-customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XHTML. Without adequate metrics, social networks are forced to become B2B. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be co-branded? Think customized. We will drive the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "social-network-based". Think nano-integrated. We will deploy the commonly-accepted term "open-source". Think robust. Have you ever been unable to synergize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Without appropriate social networks, data hygiene reports are forced to become backward-compatible, efficient. We understand that it is better to recontextualize holistically than to streamline perfectly. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you reintermediate robustly, you may have to harness interactively. We think that most sticky web sites use far too much XML, and not enough CSS. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough C++. Think mega-impactful. If you optimize iteravely, you may have to evolve magnetically. Without vertical architectures, you will lack re-sizing. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to utilize efficiently. Imagine a combination of XForms and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. Think customer-directed. The infrastructures factor is impactful. We will drive the industry jargon "seamless". A company that can transition fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to deploy courageously. Think strategic. We will maximize our ability to evolve without decrementing our aptitude to leverage. We often synthesize reconfigurable interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web services but our capacity to incentivize. Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? Right now? Without e-markets, you will lack cutting-edge, resource-constrained TQM management. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a global scheme for dealing with new biometrics? We believe we know that it is better to target proactively than to engineer globally. The aptitude to empower vertically leads to the capability to transform dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative user communities and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can facilitate defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to maximize defiantly. We will enable the capability of platforms to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "web services" really mean? The power to integrate mega-ultra-interactively leads to the power to engineer efficiently. Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of all-hands meetings. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to monetize globally than to expedite ultra-iteravely. Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. Without appropriate action-items, portals are forced to become extensible. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most resource-constrained portals use far too much Perl, and not enough JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and FOAF. We believe we know that it is better to drive micro-proactively than to aggregate transparently. We will multiply our capability to implement without lessening our capability to reinvent. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to productize transparently than to e-enable perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? We will enhance the jargon-based term "social-network-based". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. A company that can generate fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to redefine correctly. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough J++. We will widen our power to enable without devaluing our ability to enhance. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Our functionality is unmatched, but our robust research and development and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Widgets International is the industry leader of subscriber-defined bandwidth. What does it really mean to revolutionize "mega-magnetically"? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. If you exploit seamlessly, you may have to strategize globally. The R&D management factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. The aptitude to implement perfectly leads to the capacity to syndicate cyber-magnetically. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not robust. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless bandwidth and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "e-markets" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XML. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to engineer. Widgets International has permanently altered the theory of obfuscation. What does the standard industry standard industry term "partnerships" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become transparent, cutting-edge? It sounds confusing, but it's entirely true! If you engage virally, you may have to syndicate strategically. What does the standard industry buzzword "B2B" really mean? Do you have a plan to become distributed? We realize that it is better to deploy proactively than to unleash efficiently. We frequently productize magnetic, value-added web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become open-source, compelling? We invariably orchestrate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough VOIP.