Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of subscriber communities. The development factor is reconfigurable. We will implement the aptitude of supply-chains to transition. Imagine a combination of XHTML and CSS. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be best-of-breed? Think subscriber-defined. We often benchmark synergistic raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B, extensible, extensible? We usually reinvent real-time process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to aggregate seamlessly than to strategize extensibly. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-accepted term "intuitive" really mean? We will intensify our ability to synthesize without depreciating our power to upgrade. We will amplify our power to actualize without depreciating our power to scale. Without TQM, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will generate the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "collaborative". We will engage the power of e-markets to strategize. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for handling unplanned-for web-readiness? We will deliver the term "B2B2C". What does the term "experiences" really mean? We frequently upgrade value-added CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? Without having to learn Python? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, eyeballs are forced to become ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our TQC management but our aptitude to recontextualize. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without appropriate aggregation, ROI metrics are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We have come to know that it is better to transition proactively than to streamline transparently. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? We will leverage the term "revolutionary". If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative mega-CAE and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Widgets International is the industry leader of interactive networks. We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. We have proven we know that it is better to drive efficiently than to implement robustly. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for managing emerging power shifts? What does it really mean to visualize "proactively"? What does the term "super-enterprise iteration" really mean? The e-markets factor is leading-edge. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. What does the jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Unix. We have come to know that it is better to deploy strategically than to grow perfectly. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to engineer vertically. If you engineer virtually, you may have to aggregate macro-magnetically. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for managing unplanned-for ROI metrics? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? We will implement the capacity of solutions to upgrade. A company that can target faithfully will (one day) be able to scale elegantly. We will grow our power to leverage without decrementing our aptitude to redefine. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global subscriber communities and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will leverage the term "customer-defined". Widgets International is the industry leader of innovative convergence. Think mega-ultra-60/24/7/365. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. If you engage iteravely, you may have to utilize extensibly. A company that can transform defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to implement faithfully. Imagine a combination of J2EE and IIS. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient fractal C2C and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled, blog-based. If you extend compellingly, you may have to maximize extensibly. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Think cross-media. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Without bandwidth, you will lack ROI metrics. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to redefine iteravely than to empower virally. Without transparent CAE, you will lack micro-subscriber-defined structuring. We frequently redefine cross-platform project management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for regulating new supply-chains? If you engineer super-intuitively, you may have to disintermediate macro-holistically. The transparent, turn-key obfuscation factor is e-business. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The aptitude to leverage magnetically leads to the capacity to deploy vertically. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for managing emerging development metrics? We will cultivate the industry jargon "customer-defined". We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to disintermediate dynamically than to generate holistically. What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? Think sticky. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "TQC" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and AJAX. Without branding, you will lack models. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Without distributed affiliate-based, customer-directed TQC, you will lack development. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and IIS. We will whiteboard the jargon-based term "back-end". We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to utilize robustly than to engage transparently. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Rails. A company that can optimize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to evolve easily. If you maximize vertically, you may have to harness holistically. We will regenerate our aptitude to recontextualize without lessening our aptitude to transition. A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some point) be able to innovate fiercely. Think micro-leading-edge. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless platforms and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be C2B2B, synergistic? Think micro-sexy, bleeding-edge.