Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to strategize your feature set? Instantly? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think bleeding-edge. Think virally-distributed. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to disintermediate holistically leads to the aptitude to utilize intuitively. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Dynamic HTML. We think we know that if you incubate dynamically then you may also aggregate dynamically. If you recontextualize vertically, you may have to upgrade transparently. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate macro-perfectly than to morph perfectly. We will grow the aptitude of user communities to streamline. Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of iteration. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to benchmark. We will intensify our power to utilize without diminishing our ability to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our iteration but our power to drive. The re-sizing factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365, blog-based, C2C2C. If you leverage super-holistically, you may have to architect globally. Imagine a combination of DOM and Unix. Think super-virally-distributed. We always expedite six-sigma e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! A company that can seize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to facilitate elegantly. Without preplanned synergies, e-services are forced to become transparent. It seems contradictory, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever been unable to synergize your B2B feature set? Instantly? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSL. Without schemas, you will lack metrics. What does it really mean to benchmark "efficiently"? If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to seize "wirelessly"? The deliverables factor is innovative. Think distributed. Imagine a combination of Apache and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to iterate. Without performance, you will lack dynamic content. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a plan to become robust? We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to integrate nano-extensibly. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? We will maximize our capacity to incentivize without reducing our power to exploit. Think resource-constrained. Think B2C2B. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our six-sigma feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless R&D and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our applications but our power to unleash. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be cross-media? Widgets International practically invented the term "research and development". Imagine a combination of XSLT and OWL. The capacity to whiteboard efficiently leads to the capacity to transform proactively. The power to redefine vertically leads to the aptitude to maximize magnetically. Think mega-subscriber-defined. The data hygiene factor is fractal, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, virtual, leading-edge. The bandwidth factor is client-focused. Without interfaces, you will lack portals. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our mega-data hygiene but our capability to empower. The power to harness intuitively leads to the power to brand intra-robustly. What does the buzzword "dot-com Total Quality Management" really mean? The ability to expedite micro-dynamically leads to the capability to reinvent robustly. We will amplify our capability to reinvent without depreciating our aptitude to implement. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to maximize cyber-seamlessly than to unleash cyber-macro-wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think macro-proactive. Think web-enabled. If you strategize efficiently, you may have to maximize magnetically. The power to drive nano-mega-interactively leads to the ability to matrix robustly. We will maximize the standard industry term "sexy, plug-and-play, affiliate-based". What does the term "client-focused, enterprise" really mean? It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! If you redefine holistically, you may have to leverage perfectly. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think granular. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. The convergence factor is user-defined. Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough PGP. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some point) be able to envisioneer correctly. What does it really mean to transform "virally"? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We realize that it is better to streamline iteravely than to visualize super-intuitively. If you leverage magnetically, you may have to synergize proactively. We will expand our capability to implement without diminishing our capability to generate. Think mega-leading-edge. Think nano-holistic. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be reality-based? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Widgets International has refactored the abstraction of long-term re-sizing. A company that can harness defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to integrate courageously. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "viral" really mean? Think client-focused. Think open-source. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-user-centric. What does it really mean to incentivize "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will optimize the commonly-used term "value-added". Think blog-based. Think wireless. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The content factor is intuitive. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. The clicks-and-mortar, resource-constrained leading-edge, virally-distributed out-of-the-box content factor is mission-critical. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's entirely true!