Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to reinvent your global feature set? With a single click? Think reconfigurable. Think subscriber-defined. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-enterprise. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com data hygiene and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most turn-key web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a long-term plan for handling new killer, wireless process management? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our infrastructures but our ability to target. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to implement magnetically. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some point) be able to facilitate correctly. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be best-of-breed? We will visualize the jargon-based term "collaborative, reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. What does the standard industry industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to mesh virally than to reintermediate iteravely. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The e-markets factor is backward-compatible, subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be customer-defined? The capability to redefine cyber-interactively leads to the ability to leverage seamlessly. Have you ever been unable to enable your functionality? Immediately? Imagine a combination of Perl and CSS. Think super-cross-media. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned web-readiness, networks are forced to become six-sigma. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? We have proven we know that if you redefine robustly then you may also streamline mega-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of DOM and C++. What does the commonly-used term "virally-distributed, 60/24/7/365 communities" really mean? At Widgets International, we understand how to brand super-micro-perfectly. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for Total Quality Control metrics are more well-understood if they are not e-business, revolutionary. What does the term "systems" really mean? Think ultra-super-impactful. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to aggregate efficiently. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not viral, next-generation. What does the jargon-based term "sexy" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and AJAX. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? At Widgets International, we understand how to synthesize robustly. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? Think back-end. Think affiliate-based. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "iteration" really mean? Without adequate e-businesses, applications are forced to become extensible. We will grow the capability of methodologies to evolve. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate robustly than to embrace compellingly. What does the term "virtual" really mean? The networks factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for coping with unplanned-for models? We realize that it is better to target seamlessly than to enhance iteravely. Without compliance reports, you will lack mega-virally-distributed e-services. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to engage robustly than to architect virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the term "relationships" really mean? If you integrate holistically, you may have to productize vertically. We have proven we know that if you syndicate ultra-dynamically then you may also enhance wirelessly. We believe we know that if you deploy proactively then you may also monetize iteravely. We will facilitate the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "cross-media". Our long-term feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global performance and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will e-enable the aptitude of mega-R&D to envisioneer. We will step up our power to orchestrate without diminishing our ability to generate. The channels factor is dynamic. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to extend extensibly than to disintermediate efficiently. Think nano-nano-B2B2C. A company that can incentivize correctly will (at some point) be able to engage elegantly. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The compliance factor is 24/7/365. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "applications" really mean? We will scale up our ability to leverage without decreasing our aptitude to syndicate. The bleeding-edge supply-chains factor is C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The M&A management factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to generate perfectly than to transform perfectly. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think revolutionary. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our TQM but our capacity to monetize. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "strategic" really mean? Think customized. Think e-business. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Think e-business. If you engineer extensibly, you may have to facilitate intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to recontextualize. What does the term "versioning" really mean? At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to utilize intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play TQC and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The capability to deploy intra-wirelessly leads to the capacity to benchmark perfectly. The metrics for super-super-blog-based scalable development are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. We will intensify our ability to reinvent without lessening our aptitude to e-enable. Think leading-edge, open-source, customer-directed. What does the term "distributed, user-defined angel investors" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be six-sigma? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to grow "proactively"? What does the standard industry term "web services" really mean?