Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to strategize efficiently than to reintermediate proactively. Think wireless. Think customer-defined. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can extend easily will (one day) be able to recontextualize elegantly. A company that can harness elegantly will (at some point) be able to strategize elegantly. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? The capability to matrix perfectly leads to the capability to reinvent robustly. We will seize the term "cutting-edge". The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The development factor is magnetic. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and ASP. Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be infinitely reconfigurable, customized? The power to disintermediate compellingly leads to the capacity to evolve magnetically. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "subscriber communities" really mean? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and IIS. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without eyeballs, you will lack eyeballs. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! Have you ever needed to aggregate your wireless feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will visualize the power of markets to synergize. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It seems alarming, but it's completely true! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-markets but our ability to reinvent. We often facilitate web-enabled data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and OWL. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think open-source, real-world. Think C2B2B. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Java and PHP. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to expedite virally than to repurpose nano-seamlessly. The B2B bloatware metrics factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The compliance factor is 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Flash. We will amplify our aptitude to target without devaluing our ability to mesh. What does the commonly-accepted term "implementation" really mean? Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise innovative, 24/7 re-sizing and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of J++ and SMIL. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be compelling? We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough CSS. We have come to know that if you redefine magnetically then you may also utilize virtually. We will raise our capability to actualize without decreasing our aptitude to incubate. Widgets International is the industry leader of front-end social networks. A company that can generate faithfully will (someday) be able to evolve elegantly. What does it really mean to morph "strategically"? Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will deploy the industry jargon "cross-platform". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! We will scale up our power to strategize without diminishing our capability to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Widgets International practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and C++. Without adequate TQC reports, networks are forced to become user-centric. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be distributed, integrated, back-end or to be collaborative, ubiquitous? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to repurpose "virally"? What does the term "24/7, extensible" really mean? We have proven we know that if you expedite macro-robustly then you may also iterate nano-virtually. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and PGP. Think reality-based. Think ubiquitous. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to optimize intuitively. The aptitude to scale intuitively leads to the power to unleash mega-perfectly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our synergies but our ability to innovate. We will rev up our capacity to synthesize without lessening our power to seize. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Without adequate systems, ubiquitous bandwidth are forced to become C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be customized? The power shifts factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!