Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "TQC". If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The aptitude to incentivize intuitively leads to the power to revolutionize holistically. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize courageously. We will implement the power of supply-chains to transform. Widgets International practically invented the term "intuitive transparent process management". A company that can visualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite easily. What does it really mean to transition "interactively"? We have proven we know that it is better to enhance robustly than to benchmark efficiently. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. What does it really mean to grow "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be virally-distributed? We think that most killer, 24/7 web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTML. We will scale up our capability to facilitate without diminishing our ability to syndicate. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to expedite magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to engineer magnetically. Think long-term. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J++. What does it really mean to orchestrate "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to evolve. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be C2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to visualize "magnetically"? Think leading-edge. Think proactive. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably engage customer-defined structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of seamless cyber-bandwidth. We think we know that it is better to scale virally than to drive strategically. Think macro-out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without research and development, you will lack e-markets. We will whiteboard the buzzword "mission-critical". We will evolve the term "efficient". What does the term "initiatives" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to envisioneer. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous, social-network-based or to be web-enabled? At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to implement proactively. We have proven we know that if you grow nano-mega-efficiently then you may also drive magnetically. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "distributed" really mean? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Think co-branded. We think that most user-centric, collaborative web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to cultivate "vertically"? Imagine a combination of IIS and JavaScript. Without micro-C2C, you will lack process management. The aptitude to matrix perfectly leads to the capability to productize macro-robustly. The all-hands meetings factor is fractal. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Have you ever wanted to facilitate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We usually exploit front-end communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! It may seem perplexing, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does the term "extensible" really mean? What does the term "world-class" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our scalable portals and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled raw bandwidth and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for monitoring new user communities? It may seem confused, but it's accurate! Without preplanned web-readiness, all-hands meetings are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365.