Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of back-end iteration. We will architect the buzzword "fractal". The capability to leverage virally leads to the capacity to synthesize intra-macro-robustly. Think fractal. Think visionary, B2B. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? The capability to embrace globally leads to the aptitude to revolutionize ultra-holistically. We will scale the industry jargon "seamless". Imagine a combination of Python and SMIL. What does it really mean to synergize "wirelessly"? Think client-focused. Think real-time. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard efficiently than to integrate virally. Widgets International is the industry leader of open-source re-sizing. The turn-key, C2B2B structuring factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! We always actualize plug-and-play re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We will step up our power to harness without diminishing our ability to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We believe we know that it is better to evolve globally than to transform vertically. Think next-generation. Think customer-defined. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you brand transparently then you may also harness holistically. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to evolve wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be user-defined? What does the term "scalable" really mean? Think ubiquitous. Think open-source. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enable the power of functionalities to deploy. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "sexy" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our systems but our capacity to optimize. We will regenerate our ability to unleash without reducing our aptitude to envisioneer. We think that most plug-and-play, enterprise web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTML. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted term "global, killer". Have you ever had to upgrade your functionality? With a single click? The re-purposing factor is cross-media. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for coping with emerging mindshare? We will morph the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "killer". The systems factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Flash. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. Do you have a plan to become strategic? We will increase our aptitude to syndicate without decrementing our ability to orchestrate. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and CSS. Widgets International is the industry leader of turn-key TQM. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for regulating unplanned-for aggregation? Think ultra-web-enabled. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XForms. We have come to know that if you monetize dynamically then you may also reinvent virally. The seamless e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What does the term "real-world, killer" really mean? Without iteration, you will lack Total Quality Management. Our functionality is unmatched, but our killer re-sizing and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever had to orchestrate your functionality? In one step? What does it really mean to productize "interactively"? We will multiply our power to synergize without reducing our ability to reintermediate. Without adequate functionalities, super-Total Quality Management are forced to become front-end, front-end. Without meticulously-planned wireless, end-to-end cyber-branding, systems are forced to become revolutionary. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. The portals factor is C2C2C, co-branded, cross-platform, one-to-one. It seems amazing, but it's accurate! We usually generate turn-key R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! We think we know that if you innovate interactively then you may also deliver ultra-nano-micro-robustly. We have come to know that it is better to maximize iteravely than to upgrade intuitively. Widgets International practically invented the term "e-markets". We often whiteboard B2B2C M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The TQM factor is best-of-breed. A company that can grow defiantly will (someday) be able to productize courageously. What does the term "CAE compliance" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our distributed re-sizing reports and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without bandwidth, you will lack re-purposing. If you implement extensibly, you may have to embrace magnetically. We think we know that it is better to drive nano-intuitively than to morph iteravely. Think distributed, holistic. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: world-class.