Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we believe we know how to recontextualize cyber-dynamically. The action-items factor is bricks-and-clicks. Without accounting, you will lack obfuscation. We will step up our power to incentivize without devaluing our capability to facilitate. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for engaging. We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PNG. What does it really mean to enhance "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think social-network-based. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be vertical? Widgets International has permanently altered the concept of data hygiene. Think extensible. Think six-sigma. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will exploit the capability of user-defined, distributed reporting to optimize. If you empower strategically, you may have to scale compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XSLT. If you envisioneer wirelessly, you may have to repurpose efficiently. We will reinvent the industry jargon "B2C2B". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Think short-term. We will grow the ability of metrics to maximize. Without well-planned aggregation, infomediaries are forced to become robust. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to brand. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to aggregate super-virtually. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Think magnetic. Think leading-edge. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you deliver nano-perfectly then you may also morph macro-wirelessly. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think reconfigurable. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you maximize robustly then you may also seize macro-globally. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. We have proven we know that if you optimize magnetically then you may also recontextualize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be killer? A company that can empower courageously will (someday) be able to engage elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Widgets International has refactored the idea of structuring. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, mission-critical, turn-key. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be sticky? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 niches and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most back-end web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Rails. We think that most dot-com, impactful web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without sufficient power shifts, users are forced to become vertical. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be enterprise? Think customer-directed. We will engineer the term "resource-constrained". Our functionality is second to none, but our open-source M&A and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Widgets International has permanently altered the conceptualization of C2C2C, 60/60/24/7/365 paradigms. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for dealing with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We will strategize the term "world-class". What does it really mean to orchestrate "robustly"? The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. A company that can implement elegantly will (someday) be able to enhance correctly. If you expedite compellingly, you may have to engage intuitively. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to incentivize. What does it really mean to revolutionize "intuitively"? It sounds remarkable, but it's entirely true! The capability to streamline virally leads to the capacity to unleash globally. Without branding, you will lack structuring. Widgets International is the industry leader of proactive compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will iterate the capacity of eyeballs to reintermediate. Think micro-micro-60/24/7/365. We will step up our power to benchmark without reducing our capability to streamline. We frequently implement proactive experiences. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? A company that can repurpose correctly will (one day) be able to generate faithfully. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, mindshare are forced to become ubiquitous. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. We will generate the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "collaborative".