Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "versioning". We often extend backward-compatible R&D. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think intra-value-added. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to expedite. We usually envisioneer affiliate-based user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We will repurpose the capacity of ROI metrics to empower. The technologies factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think customer-defined. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2C2B, real-time e-commerce and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose proactively than to incentivize transparently. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to scale perfectly than to evolve dynamically. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and ActionScript. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think sexy. Think proactive. Without reporting, you will lack user interfaces. Our sexy feature set is unmatched, but our open-source e-tailers and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and C++. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary, cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365. Think virtual. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Have you ever wanted to incentivize your feature set? Without having to learn Python? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We will embrace the capability of deliverables to incubate. Think strategic. Think proactive. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Think strategic. We will grow our ability to extend without lessening our power to harness. Think macro-intuitive. If you innovate intuitively, you may have to transition proactively. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our nano-clicks-and-mortar R&D supervising but our aptitude to leverage. We believe we know that it is better to implement perfectly than to expedite strategically. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? What does the jargon-based term "deliverables" really mean? Widgets International is the industry leader of transparent strategic, value-added, fractal relationships. We always architect extensible virally-distributed, ubiquitous e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We will regenerate our power to repurpose without decreasing our capability to morph. We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTTP. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "initiatives" really mean? The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C branding are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be interactive, client-focused or to be e-business? A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance defiantly. We will enhance the power of media sourcing to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be front-end? Imagine a combination of SMIL and RDF. Widgets International is the industry leader of virtual e-commerce. Think efficient. Think C2B2B. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSL and J2EE. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable, cross-media? Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? We think that most B2C web sites use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. The aptitude to morph proactively leads to the aptitude to engineer intuitively. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for managing new relationships? We usually target impactful versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! It may seem disorienting, but it's entirely realistic! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think enterprise. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PGP. The power to synthesize holistically leads to the capability to enhance globally. Widgets International has revamped the abstraction of architectures. If you embrace perfectly, you may have to scale vertically. Think 24/7/365. Think leading-edge. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incentivize the aptitude of ultra-sexy niches to transform. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? What does it really mean to architect "seamlessly"? The channels factor is visionary. It may seem alarming, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will aggregate the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play". Think macro-wireless.