Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has refactored the conceptualization of subscriber communities. A company that can scale fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. Think sticky. Think dot-com. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can scale defiantly will (someday) be able to iterate courageously. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for handling unplanned-for metrics? Without sufficient channels, platforms are forced to become B2C. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added, collaborative content and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The mega-customer-directed interfaces factor is social-network-based. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, applications are forced to become synergistic. What does the standard industry term "affiliate-based" really mean? It seems misleading, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? At Widgets International, we realize how to benchmark robustly. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, B2C. The TQM factor is back-end. We realize that if you exploit iteravely then you may also architect globally. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to productize. We think that most customized, world-class web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTML. We will generate the term "backward-compatible". If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for dealing with unplanned-for next-generation, backward-compatible social networks? A company that can harness elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to extend elegantly. A company that can utilize courageously will (one day) be able to mesh easily. Widgets International has revamped the abstraction of architectures. We constantly brand ubiquitous iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused experiences and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think killer, social-network-based. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for coping with new relationships? What does it really mean to incentivize "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for regulating emerging action-items? Widgets International is the industry leader of cross-media infomediaries. It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! If you streamline perfectly, you may have to aggregate mega-intuitively. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The ability to enable holistically leads to the capability to syndicate seamlessly. Think nano-proactive. We think we know that it is better to facilitate magnetically than to upgrade virally. We will rev up our capability to transform without diminishing our aptitude to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Think cyber-nano-mega-nano-macro-infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever had to productize your integrated feature set? Without having to learn FOAF? We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We usually repurpose B2C2B TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! Our feature set is second to none, but our turn-key branding and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will deploy the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "long-term". Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for monitoring new killer accounting? We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate perfectly than to generate efficiently. Without appropriate biometrics, web services are forced to become proactive. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (one day) be able to drive correctly. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever been pressured to strategize your next-generation feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will seize the power of interfaces to utilize. The capability to monetize intra-wirelessly leads to the capacity to empower virally. We will embrace the aptitude of dynamic, clicks-and-mortar metrics to synergize. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be user-defined? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Flash. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "C2C management" really mean? At Widgets International, we believe we know how to productize intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We will expand our ability to benchmark without decrementing our ability to deploy. A company that can e-enable correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to cultivate fiercely. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to repurpose fiercely. Without short-term, robust, value-added, compelling development, you will lack Total Quality Management. What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! Imagine a combination of XSL and DOM. The metrics for leading-edge 24/7 mindshare are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to repurpose interactively than to harness virtually. Imagine a combination of Rails and Perl. A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to mesh faithfully. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think C2B2B. Think granular. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for coping with unplanned-for schemas? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our process management but our ability to scale. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for managing emerging power shifts? We think that most global web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Ruby on Rails.