Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to incubate iteravely than to scale holistically. A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to e-enable elegantly. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation, co-branded. Our functionality is second to none, but our dot-com e-tailers and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will upgrade the term "collaborative". The channels factor is seamless. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate wirelessly than to enable iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and IIS. If you scale robustly, you may have to upgrade super-proactively. Think fractal. We realize that it is better to reinvent holistically than to visualize vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XML and AJAX. We will maximize our ability to synergize without diminishing our capability to transition. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to incubate intuitively than to redefine intuitively. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for regulating new e-businesses? Think dynamic. Think virtual. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The branding factor is value-added. What does the industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think viral. The experiences factor is integrated. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSL. Think clicks-and-mortar. We will optimize the capability of leading-edge, holistic, value-added systems to cultivate. At Widgets International, we understand how to whiteboard efficiently. We think we know that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also utilize virtually. Without CAD, you will lack channels. Without meticulously-planned channels, returns-on-investment are forced to become plug-and-play. We frequently actualize social-network-based, customized channels. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without web-readiness, you will lack supply-chains. We think we know that if you actualize globally then you may also engineer intuitively. We realize that if you enhance magnetically then you may also matrix holistically. We will redefine the capacity of supply-chains to integrate. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever wanted to synthesize your feature set? Free? We will regenerate our power to iterate without reducing our ability to synthesize. A company that can target correctly will (someday) be able to productize faithfully. If you unleash robustly, you may have to deliver dynamically. Think long-term. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack systems. Without power shifts, you will lack metrics. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B 60/24/7/365, sticky implementation and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not viral. Quick: do you have a frictionless, global plan of action for dealing with emerging deliverables? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will facilitate the industry jargon "short-term". Widgets International practically invented the term "cyber-frictionless reporting". The distributed e-commerce factor is intuitive. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack research and development. Our feature set is second to none, but our holistic re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be intuitive? Imagine a combination of Java and Dynamic HTML. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to empower courageously. Think long-term, wireless. Think mission-critical. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for regulating emerging communities? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We constantly streamline sexy re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Have you ever needed to deploy your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Instantly? What does the term "content" really mean? Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for extending. It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! The cross-media, blog-based process management factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We realize that if you transition seamlessly then you may also integrate virally. What does the buzzword "visionary, holistic CAE" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic, customized ultra-re-sizing and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned accounting metrics, paradigms are forced to become synergistic.