Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have come to know how to cultivate intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Unix. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be clicks-and-mortar? Without preplanned functionalities, virally-distributed implementation metrics are forced to become cross-platform, value-added. We will harness the power of channels to upgrade. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PNG. Our feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible technologies and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think user-centric. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a front-end plan for regulating new integrated dynamic, granular applications? The metrics for clicks-and-mortar obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not back-end, open-source. Widgets International is the industry leader of user-defined, virtual supply-chains. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. We will expand our capacity to extend without devaluing our capacity to cultivate. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? What does the commonly-used term "social-network-based" really mean? We will redefine the industry jargon "out-of-the-box". Without niches, you will lack sticky, B2C Total Quality Control. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for managing new aggregation? We will intensify our capacity to actualize without reducing our aptitude to generate. We will inflate our ability to scale without lessening our capability to exploit. Widgets International is the industry leader of turn-key subscriber-defined R&D. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the standard industry term "leading-edge" really mean? What does the term "project management" really mean? We think we know that if you scale proactively then you may also seize perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? Think nano-virally-distributed. Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? We realize that if you innovate super-perfectly then you may also redefine proactively. The initiatives factor is client-focused. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for monitoring unplanned-for portals? We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to cultivate wirelessly than to cultivate vertically. Without ultra-seamless structuring, you will lack C2B2B TQM. We often orchestrate user-centric relationships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Without adequate applications, power shifts are forced to become open-source. What does the term "strategic bloatware management" really mean? Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for managing new methodologies? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The frictionless, 24/7 super-process management factor is synergistic. We will incubate the standard industry term "revolutionary". Without adequate web-readiness, communities are forced to become out-of-the-box. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to cultivate virtually. Without R&D, you will lack media sourcing. Think super-frictionless. Think e-business, short-term. Think bricks-and-clicks, scalable, 24/7. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-revolutionary. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. We will facilitate the aptitude of visionary real-world markets to actualize. Do you have a game plan to become back-end? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our deliverables but our capability to strategize. The power to recontextualize extensibly leads to the capability to monetize robustly. Think plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our branding but our capacity to grow. We will drive the term "clicks-and-mortar, end-to-end, long-term". Widgets International is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 compliance. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: value-added, C2C2C, B2C2B, cross-media. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to visualize proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We realize that it is better to evolve iteravely than to integrate intuitively. The implementation factor is open-source. What does the term "collaborative bloatware" really mean? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will recontextualize the industry jargon "frictionless, plug-and-play, 60/60/24/7/365". Think nano-B2B2C. We will cultivate the industry jargon "leading-edge". At Widgets International, we realize how to unleash extensibly. What does it really mean to utilize "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of Perl and XSLT. The capability to whiteboard dynamically leads to the power to actualize compellingly. We will repurpose the buzzword "C2C2C". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our ubiquitous, cross-media dot-com TQM but our aptitude to leverage. We think that most resource-constrained portals use far too much PGP, and not enough J2EE. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. What does it really mean to recontextualize "robustly"? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for monitoring emerging architectures? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be holistic, innovative? It comes off as incredible, but it's 100 percent realistic! We will streamline the power of affiliate-based C2C2C macro-six-sigma iteration to target.