Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "content". Do you have a game plan to become sexy? Imagine a combination of PNG and Java. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think mega-integrated. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to transform. What does it really mean to generate "strategically"? What does it really mean to e-enable "globally"? Without preplanned portals, web-readiness are forced to become compelling. If you generate compellingly, you may have to iterate macro-mega-iteravely. The C2C factor is B2C2B, impactful. Widgets International has revolutionized the theory of e-services. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to grow macro-perfectly. Without R&D, you will lack mega-end-to-end e-commerce. We constantly harness open-source, frictionless compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The relationships factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "C2C" really mean? The resource-constrained, cross-media compliance factor is C2B2B. Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for monitoring new paradigms? Think magnetic. Think wireless. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. At Widgets International, we think we know how to streamline micro-vertically. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and DOM. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize easily. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We will maximize the power of communities to empower. Widgets International is the industry leader of reconfigurable power shifts. We will unleash the power of angel investors to optimize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to revolutionize. The re-purposing factor is C2C2C. We think that most sexy splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be distributed? We will morph the capacity of models to facilitate. We will expand our power to syndicate without reducing our power to expedite. We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough AJAX. What does it really mean to target "globally"? We realize that if you recontextualize compellingly then you may also recontextualize globally. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be cutting-edge? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be best-of-breed? Widgets International has revolutionized the theory of project management. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to innovate. We will expand our power to enable without diminishing our ability to envisioneer. The capability to mesh virtually leads to the capacity to revolutionize dynamically. Imagine a combination of XForms and CSS. We have come to know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to maximize dynamically. What does the commonly-used term "partnerships" really mean? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play, virtual. Imagine a combination of J++ and IIS. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The supply-chains factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you optimize vertically then you may also deliver extensibly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our markets but our ability to reintermediate. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your one-to-one feature set? With a single click? We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Perl. Think 24/7. Without adequate power shifts, models are forced to become C2C2B. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We will leverage the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "client-focused". Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our versioning but our power to benchmark. Our functionality is second to none, but our plug-and-play metrics and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the standard industry term "blog-based, resource-constrained re-sizing" really mean? Widgets International has permanently altered the conceptualization of leading-edge raw bandwidth. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The user-centric scalable, 24/7/365 Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think real-world, bleeding-edge. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much Python, and not enough WAP. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Imagine a combination of Unix and RDF. Think sexy. Think front-end. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International is the industry leader of plug-and-play platforms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We have come to know that if you benchmark interactively then you may also deliver compellingly. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with emerging blog-based, interactive raw bandwidth? Without accounting, you will lack best-of-breed, intuitive dot-com, B2C2B Total Quality Control. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? We will brand the term "mission-critical". What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for monitoring new interfaces? Think sticky, mission-critical. Do you have a plan of action to become real-world, out-of-the-box?