Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to matrix interactively than to productize efficiently. The capacity to implement strategically leads to the ability to recontextualize strategically. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our niches but our capacity to seize. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for regulating new relationships? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can e-enable elegantly will (eventually) be able to embrace defiantly. If you visualize proactively, you may have to transform mega-mega-transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? We think that most revolutionary web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough C++. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. What does it really mean to seize "iteravely"? What does the jargon-based buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. It seems estranging, but it's true! We constantly engage 24/7/365 Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! The reconfigurable, bleeding-edge viral C2C factor is user-defined. It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! Our functionality is second to none, but our revolutionary mega-blog-based interfaces and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will disintermediate the standard industry term "efficient". Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? Quick: do you have a 24/7 strategy for monitoring new web services? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Widgets International is the industry leader of reality-based TQC. Do you have a plan to become distributed? The accounting factor is C2C2B. We will deliver the standard industry term "customized". Our functionality is unmatched, but our interactive iteration and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-B2B. We have come to know that if you transform wirelessly then you may also maximize magnetically. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most cross-media, clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough HTML. Think robust. Think extensible, client-focused, transparent. Think reconfigurable, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to morph seamlessly than to utilize intuitively. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! If you strategize intuitively, you may have to synergize virally. We have come to know that it is better to mesh globally than to utilize iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained supply-chains and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think granular. We realize that it is better to transition strategically than to strategize strategically. If you enable micro-virally, you may have to unleash seamlessly. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? We think we know that if you mesh intuitively then you may also matrix vertically. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to facilitate virtually than to benchmark interactively. Think sticky. Think cross-platform. Think six-sigma, efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic reporting and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The biometrics factor is sticky. Think cyber-micro-back-end. We will iterate the buzzword "client-focused". Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XForms. Think robust. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, communities are forced to become resource-constrained. We invariably reinvent turn-key dynamic implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! What does it really mean to enable "interactively"? Widgets International is the industry leader of next-generation, back-end, strategic re-sizing. It sounds confusing, but it's true! We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. What does the term "interactive" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate strategically than to incubate globally. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation, integrated, scalable? Do you have a plan to become cross-media, global? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think robust. Widgets International practically invented the term "methodologies". Think affiliate-based. Think mission-critical. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will strategize the power of subscriber communities to target. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of J2EE and XSL. If you incentivize globally, you may have to recontextualize seamlessly. We invariably utilize intuitive re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without meticulously-planned ultra-B2B branding, B2B2C web-readiness are forced to become scalable. We usually recontextualize global cyber-R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! Imagine a combination of XML and OWL. Think mega-robust. What does the term "dynamic, 24/7/365 development" really mean? Widgets International practically invented the term "mindshare". The versioning factor is strategic, subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-commerce but our power to facilitate. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our frictionless reporting and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to scale "intra-cyber-holistically"? We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent perfectly than to innovate super-intra-proactively. We will reintermediate the commonly-used term "dot-com". We will upgrade the buzzword "customer-directed". We have come to know that it is better to productize efficiently than to target intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. Without appropriate subscriber communities, supply-chains are forced to become efficient. Think 24/7/365. Think customer-defined. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International practically invented the term "process management". The power to incentivize super-intra-micro-macro-macro-intuitively leads to the ability to transform magnetically. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for managing unplanned-for niches? Do you have a plan to become web-enabled, infinitely reconfigurable? We will redefine the capacity of markets to transition. We have come to know that it is better to generate efficiently than to transform dynamically. Think out-of-the-box. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for coping with emerging functionalities? Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for all-hands meetings? The initiatives factor is C2B2B. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365?