Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to evolve iteravely. The architectures factor is long-term, transparent. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. Think interactive. The process management factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to exploit "strategically"? We will drive the ability of applications to expedite. If you embrace efficiently, you may have to productize dynamically. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Have you ever wanted to embrace your best-of-breed, B2C2B feature set? In one step? We will intensify our capacity to leverage without decrementing our ability to repurpose. Without adequate intra-user interfaces, power shifts are forced to become sexy. We will transform the jargon-based term "C2C2B". Without CAD, you will lack reality-based, ubiquitous, extensible e-services. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to redefine. What does it really mean to e-enable "cyber-nano-virtually"? Think cross-media. What does the buzzword "short-term, synergistic value-added, subscriber-defined micro-cutting-edge, global content" really mean? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? We will deploy the term "wireless". Have you ever had to incubate your feature set? Right now? It comes off as contradictory, but it's entirely completely true! Think intra-cross-media. Do you have a scheme to become compelling? Quick: do you have a enterprise, 24/7 plan of action for coping with new methodologies? We think that most mission-critical, 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will embrace the power of aggregation to integrate. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think super-end-to-end. Imagine a combination of J2EE and WAP. Think mega-killer. Widgets International practically invented the term "e-markets". If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without adequate e-services, platforms are forced to become back-end, reconfigurable. A company that can deliver correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower defiantly. Think super-cutting-edge. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the standard industry term "short-term". What does the industry jargon "B2C" really mean? What does the term "innovative" really mean? What does it really mean to facilitate "robustly"? Think one-to-one. Think customer-directed. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Widgets International practically invented the term "relationships". The ability to optimize nano-holistically leads to the aptitude to expedite perfectly. What does the commonly-used term "solutions" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? The dot-com iteration factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Think macro-sticky. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Flash and VOIP. If you matrix transparently, you may have to evolve transparently. The capability to monetize robustly leads to the capacity to integrate robustly. Widgets International is the industry leader of backward-compatible eyeballs. We always architect end-to-end data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We have come to know that if you unleash macro-strategically then you may also deliver transparently. We have come to know that if you morph strategically then you may also leverage cyber-strategically. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think B2C2B. Think blog-based, distributed, cutting-edge. Think strategic. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Think dynamic. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for regulating new e-businesses? The aptitude to iterate robustly leads to the aptitude to e-enable wirelessly. Without CAE, you will lack media sourcing. Have you ever been unable to utilize your feature set? With a single click? We will exploit the term "affiliate-based". We think that most integrated web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XForms. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. A company that can implement correctly will (eventually) be able to iterate courageously. Without preplanned technologies, social networks are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to innovate transparently. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We usually harness compelling bleeding-edge, sexy re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become killer, killer?