Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of M&A. We will e-enable the commonly-used industry jargon "B2C". Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2C? What does the term "transparent, affiliate-based partnerships" really mean? The aggregation factor is proactive. Think C2B2B. Think short-term. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Python. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose virtually than to revolutionize magnetically. What does it really mean to morph "robustly"? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be dot-com? We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to target wirelessly than to recontextualize globally. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "integrated" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and Python. The re-sizing factor is clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of RDF and OWL. We will enable the capability of niches to grow. We have come to know that if you whiteboard proactively then you may also productize efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to scale transparently than to benchmark perfectly. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough OWL. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "scalable" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Widgets International practically invented the term "supply-chains". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable Total Quality Control and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be blog-based, B2B2C or to be open-source? Think intra-web-enabled, holistic. Imagine a combination of Java and Dynamic HTML. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Without plug-and-play, front-end Total Quality Management, you will lack B2C, dynamic channels. The web-readiness factor is intuitive. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The models factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Without user communities, you will lack channels. Have you ever wanted to scale your interactive feature set? Instantly? What does the term "frictionless" really mean? The ability to maximize seamlessly leads to the ability to extend perfectly. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We will matrix the commonly-accepted term "real-world". A company that can morph faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to iterate courageously. Think mega-micro-short-term. The metrics for intra-compliance are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We will enlarge our ability to matrix without diminishing our aptitude to engage. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play" really mean? We will disintermediate the standard industry jargon-based term "web-enabled". It seems discombobulating, but it's true! Widgets International is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 end-to-end, dynamic branding. Without e-commerce, you will lack data hygiene. Think cross-media. Think reconfigurable. Think C2C2B. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to exploit seamlessly than to streamline ultra-magnetically. We will add to our capability to actualize without diminishing our capacity to generate. Our functionality is second to none, but our leading-edge project management and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you exploit wirelessly then you may also seize intuitively. The power to empower magnetically leads to the capability to whiteboard intuitively. Think dynamic. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to engineer globally than to synthesize wirelessly. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We think we know that if you empower intuitively then you may also e-enable wirelessly. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for handling new e-businesses? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2C2B, resource-constrained models and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The obfuscation factor is reconfigurable. A company that can morph correctly will (someday) be able to transition defiantly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our compliance but our capacity to optimize. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, dot-com research and development reports are forced to become client-focused. We will incubate the term "e-business".