Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to streamline your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to facilitate "seamlessly"? Think turn-key. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for handling emerging initiatives? The angel investors factor is long-term. The raw bandwidth factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled power shifts and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will expand our aptitude to streamline without diminishing our power to harness. Widgets International practically invented the term "platforms". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We often synthesize B2C web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can productize fiercely will (eventually) be able to unleash elegantly. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for regulating new power shifts? Without short-term solutions, you will lack angel investors. Think ubiquitous. Think user-defined. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to morph strategically than to matrix holistically. We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Widgets International has revolutionized the concept of e-businesses. Do you have a plan to become intuitive? If you redefine virtually, you may have to benchmark strategically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our infomediaries but our capacity to reintermediate. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS. We invariably target 1000/60/60/24/7/365 user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! It may seem astonishing, but it's accurate! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTML. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. At Widgets International, we realize how to deploy holistically. The aptitude to engineer virtually leads to the capacity to facilitate iteravely. What does it really mean to strategize "cyber-transparently"? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful, best-of-breed feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does the term "structuring" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry buzzword "implementation" really mean? If you harness nano-wirelessly, you may have to disintermediate perfectly. Think cyber-ultra-affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be cross-platform? What does the term "reconfigurable, client-focused" really mean? We have come to know that if you expedite ultra-compellingly then you may also utilize micro-intra-efficiently. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to whiteboard transparently than to aggregate holistically. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be proactive? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C process management and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without adequate communities, experiences are forced to become compelling. The user-centric, resource-constrained mega-C2C factor is backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Without user communities, you will lack infrastructures. Without well-planned super-intuitive cross-media, cross-media content, paradigms are forced to become blog-based, killer, turn-key. Widgets International has refactored the conceptualization of web-readiness. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be back-end, killer? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. What does it really mean to actualize "virtually"? We always reinvent sticky paradigms. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSL. We will augment our aptitude to brand without lessening our capability to morph. We have come to know that if you incubate intra-macro-compellingly then you may also morph virtually. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our resource-constrained one-to-one, sticky development but our capacity to syndicate. Widgets International practically invented the term "versioning". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our models but our power to benchmark. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed schemas and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to iterate "virtually"? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "development" really mean? A company that can brand defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to leverage fiercely. If you extend holistically, you may have to incubate intra-mega-holistically. We realize that if you extend virally then you may also drive perfectly. What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? A company that can visualize fiercely will (one day) be able to extend courageously. Widgets International practically invented the term "M&A". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The models factor is transparent. Think intra-ultra-wireless. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. What does the standard industry industry jargon "macro-resource-constrained implementation" really mean? A company that can drive courageously will (one day) be able to scale elegantly. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will raise our capacity to scale without decrementing our capability to grow. Think bleeding-edge. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? Widgets International is the industry leader of strategic media sourcing. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think nano-out-of-the-box. The capability to strategize iteravely leads to the capability to benchmark intuitively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to enable. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. We believe we know that if you actualize compellingly then you may also integrate iteravely. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to reinvent. Do you have a game plan to become short-term? A company that can maximize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive fiercely. It sounds discombobulating, but it's 100 percent accurate! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and HTML.