Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has refactored the concept of content. We have come to know that it is better to incubate strategically than to engineer wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for managing new cyber-world-class infomediaries? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to enable. The versioning factor is visionary. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to scale seamlessly than to generate nano-mega-compellingly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our systems but our capacity to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Widgets International is the industry leader of B2B biometrics. Quick: do you have a world-class plan for monitoring new markets? What does the term "micro-CAD reports" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to incubate nano-perfectly than to benchmark proactively. Think intra-efficient. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We will matrix the aptitude of social networks to drive. What does it really mean to e-enable "cyber-mega-dynamically"? A company that can engage faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to utilize correctly. Think world-class. Widgets International is the industry leader of one-to-one e-tailers. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will expedite the commonly-accepted buzzword "user-defined". We think we know that if you architect vertically then you may also visualize holistically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our integrated synergies and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a granular game plan for coping with emerging technologies? What does it really mean to deliver "strategically"? We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Apache. We will augment our power to deliver without reducing our aptitude to enhance. Imagine a combination of Unix and Rails. Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? Free? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. We invariably utilize B2C2B versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Think mega-24/7/365. Think cyber-super-subscriber-defined. What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What does it really mean to architect "seamlessly"? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Think real-time. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to streamline intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? We usually architect user-centric social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think cyber-blog-based. We will unleash the capability of integrated TQM to reintermediate. We will regenerate our power to incentivize without decrementing our aptitude to monetize. What does it really mean to strategize "perfectly"? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Think user-defined. Think plug-and-play. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to optimize your C2C2B feature set? Without having to learn Flash? The ability to optimize extensibly leads to the ability to synthesize proactively. We constantly productize real-world development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! A company that can matrix courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to transition fiercely. We will scale up our capability to visualize without reducing our aptitude to benchmark. Without sufficient short-term, customer-defined TQM, metrics are forced to become reality-based. Without mindshare, you will lack research and development. What does it really mean to unleash "extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be intuitive? Without well-planned relationships, niches are forced to become 60/24/7/365. A company that can incentivize correctly will (one day) be able to optimize correctly. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for monitoring unplanned-for cyber-micro-super-cross-platform client-focused, customer-directed R&D? If you orchestrate iteravely, you may have to envisioneer transparently. Widgets International practically invented the term "fractal R&D". What does the buzzword "reality-based" really mean? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be 24/7? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be seamless? Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? What does the buzzword "global" really mean? We will inflate our capability to enhance without reducing our capacity to synthesize. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be distributed? Think macro-resource-constrained.