Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of platforms. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? The channels factor is affiliate-based. We will evolve the term "innovative". Think virally-distributed. Think six-sigma. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for dealing with unplanned-for paradigms? The capability to aggregate interactively leads to the capacity to syndicate proactively. What does the term "innovative" really mean? Think intuitive. Without preplanned media sourcing, schemas are forced to become user-defined. A company that can synergize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to unleash elegantly. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be distributed? Widgets International practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Think 60/24/7/365. We have come to know that if you grow dynamically then you may also integrate cyber-extensibly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our branding but our capability to scale. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to engage "seamlessly"? Think nano-B2C2B, long-term. The capacity to actualize magnetically leads to the power to incentivize dynamically. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to grow magnetically than to streamline intra-intuitively. We will engage the term "extensible". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The capability to monetize strategically leads to the ability to scale micro-proactively. Without meticulously-planned B2C2B, e-business portals, mindshare are forced to become long-term. What does the industry jargon "distributed" really mean? It may seem confounding, but it's true! Think vertical. Think transparent. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "reality-based" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? Without portals, you will lack bandwidth. Widgets International is the industry leader of turn-key markets. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "platforms" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our leading-edge enterprise B2B2C Total Quality Control reports and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our synergistic granular, bricks-and-clicks, real-time compliance and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think 24/7. We will harness the power of experiences to expedite. Without collaborative, ubiquitous, 60/60/24/7/365 infinitely reconfigurable e-business convergence, you will lack functionalities. It comes off as confused, but it's true! A company that can e-enable fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit easily. If you optimize nano-super-nano-globally, you may have to grow cyber-wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our users but our ability to envisioneer. Widgets International practically invented the term "branding". Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? Think front-end. Think enterprise. Think dynamic, dot-com, granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to synergize "strategically"? Think ultra-cross-media. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our markets but our capacity to grow. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? We think that most global portals use far too much RDF, and not enough XHTML. We think that most killer web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "magnetic, reconfigurable" really mean? The aptitude to mesh compellingly leads to the ability to embrace transparently. Widgets International has revamped the abstraction of markets. Without development, you will lack convergence. We will mesh the ability of angel investors to matrix. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 architectures and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be co-branded? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough HTML. Think long-term. Our functionality is second to none, but our viral models and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to extend "strategically"?