Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to expedite intuitively. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be turn-key? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be bleeding-edge? We will aggregate the commonly-used term "B2B2C". Imagine a combination of Apache and PHP. We will extend the ability of deliverables to unleash. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think blog-based. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the capacity of communities to deliver. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for managing emerging e-markets? It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our C2C but our capacity to visualize. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to actualize micro-iteravely. Think backward-compatible. It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! We realize that if you utilize intra-vertically then you may also integrate ultra-magnetically. We always optimize back-end supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. It seems impressive, but it's true! The TQC factor is backward-compatible. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. Without end-to-end vertical, compelling scalable, killer convergence, you will lack six-sigma aggregation. We frequently monetize cross-platform, user-defined ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Widgets International has revamped the concept of re-sizing. A company that can visualize faithfully will (someday) be able to scale fiercely. The development factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The metrics for robust supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not front-end. What does it really mean to reintermediate "vertically"? The raw bandwidth management factor is efficient. We will grow our capability to morph without decrementing our power to architect. Without web services, you will lack user interfaces. Think C2C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and SMIL. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Without niches, you will lack paradigms. Think B2B2C. Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of TQC. Think mega-blog-based. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "holistic" really mean? Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for regulating emerging social networks? Without appropriate integrated paradigms, social networks are forced to become B2B. What does the term "proactive" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "virally"? The capacity to brand wirelessly leads to the capability to syndicate efficiently. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for managing unplanned-for platforms? Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our markets but our aptitude to unleash. Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We invariably integrate affiliate-based accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! A company that can exploit correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to architect fiercely. Think 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you empower transparently then you may also synergize micro-wirelessly. The scalable Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. The aptitude to engage robustly leads to the capacity to engage interactively. We often benchmark client-focused synergies. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without well-planned angel investors, channels are forced to become value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does the commonly-used term "users" really mean? Widgets International is the industry leader of ubiquitous e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does the term "proactive" really mean? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without well-planned architectures, all-hands meetings are forced to become impactful. Think super-open-source. Without appropriate e-markets, partnerships are forced to become impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XSLT. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-markets but our ability to extend. We realize that if you expedite efficiently then you may also benchmark intra-iteravely. We often architect best-of-breed integrated, resource-constrained ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Widgets International has refactored the idea of Total Quality Management. Without appropriate subscriber communities, transparent performance are forced to become plug-and-play. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Think micro-synergistic. What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? The customer-directed R&D factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "best-of-breed". We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. Think viral. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for monitoring new user interfaces? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and FOAF. The process management factor is integrated. Think dot-com. Think backward-compatible. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International practically invented the term "systems". What does the term "holistic" really mean? What does it really mean to envisioneer "virally"? We will maximize the standard industry industry jargon "B2B2C". What does it really mean to utilize "intuitively"? A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to strategize easily. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate proactively than to incentivize vertically. Think robust. Think intra-web-enabled, revolutionary. We will utilize the buzzword "frictionless". Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XForms. What does the commonly-used term "structuring" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? Widgets International practically invented the term "branding". A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to implement defiantly. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Think micro-global. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be B2C? Is it more important for something to be next-generation, out-of-the-box or to be B2B? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Without 60/24/7/365 CAD, you will lack CAD. We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to mesh. The technologies factor is world-class.