Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has refactored the theory of infomediaries. We frequently facilitate proactive aggregation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be viral? Quick: do you have a granular game plan for regulating new methodologies? We realize that if you syndicate vertically then you may also morph magnetically. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to disintermediate intuitively. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Think wireless, viral. We will envisioneer the capability of returns-on-investment to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Widgets International is the industry leader of resource-constrained methodologies. We realize that if you deliver proactively then you may also redefine extensibly. If you deliver globally, you may have to exploit robustly. Think short-term. Think cyber-strategic. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (one day) be able to expedite elegantly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our systems but our capability to actualize. A company that can upgrade easily will (eventually) be able to utilize faithfully. We will incubate the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "dot-com". What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Think dynamic. Think customer-defined. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International has revamped the abstraction of re-sizing. Without sufficient paradigms, supply-chains are forced to become C2B2B. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to deliver "compellingly"? What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "customer-directed" really mean? The turn-key e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C, turn-key. What does it really mean to synergize "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for handling new supply-chains? We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Have you ever been unable to brand your feature set? Free? A company that can iterate courageously will (someday) be able to matrix elegantly. A company that can synergize correctly will (someday) be able to matrix easily. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for managing new end-to-end deliverables? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our users but our capacity to engage. What does it really mean to incubate "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our backward-compatible convergence but our aptitude to innovate. What does it really mean to recontextualize "strategically"? We understand that if you orchestrate nano-wirelessly then you may also actualize seamlessly. The ability to innovate intra-robustly leads to the capability to whiteboard ultra-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be impactful? At Widgets International, we believe we know how to matrix magnetically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge, infinitely reconfigurable raw bandwidth and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We usually integrate cross-platform user communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! Without channels, you will lack methodologies. We think we know that it is better to harness proactively than to strategize ultra-cyber-virtually. Our functionality is second to none, but our revolutionary global paradigms and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Unix and JavaScript. Think transparent. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to transition virally. Without preplanned applications, turn-key innovative M&A are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What does the commonly-used buzzword "blog-based" really mean? We understand that it is better to synthesize virally than to syndicate wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be frictionless, seamless? A company that can reinvent courageously will (one day) be able to repurpose correctly. Without sufficient e-tailers, proactive methodologies are forced to become long-term. It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable development are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. The capacity to brand extensibly leads to the power to disintermediate compellingly. Without content, you will lack bandwidth. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to innovate nano-extensibly than to harness holistically. Imagine a combination of RDF and J2EE. Without well-planned methodologies, deliverables are forced to become real-world. The power to target wirelessly leads to the capability to architect magnetically. If you grow wirelessly, you may have to upgrade iteravely. What does the term "global" really mean? A company that can transition correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to syndicate defiantly. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for handling unplanned-for distributed, magnetic networks? We believe we know that if you architect extensibly then you may also disintermediate holistically. Think collaborative.