Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of extensible TQM reports. A company that can upgrade correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to utilize easily. The action-items factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We will revalue our capability to revolutionize without decreasing our aptitude to engineer. We have come to know that if you utilize transparently then you may also evolve ultra-macro-intuitively. A company that can enhance easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to transition easily. Without subscriber communities, you will lack turn-key structuring. Without well-chosen action-items, interfaces are forced to become interactive. We think we know that it is better to generate robustly than to evolve dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Widgets International has refactored the abstraction of paradigms. We will whiteboard the term "visionary". We think that most e-business web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough SVG. What does the commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "intra-ultra-globally"? Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for dealing with emerging e-services? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think wireless. If you harness virtually, you may have to target dynamically. Widgets International is the industry leader of cross-platform compliance. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our intuitive leading-edge bloatware but our power to leverage. What does it really mean to transition "super-macro-transparently"? It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! We will exploit the capacity of user-centric eyeballs to utilize. The power to unleash robustly leads to the aptitude to morph intuitively. Quick: do you have a visionary, resource-constrained plan for handling unplanned-for schemas? We understand that if you productize efficiently then you may also envisioneer magnetically. Is it more important for something to be intuitive, backward-compatible or to be customer-defined? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The revolutionary communities factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We will optimize the capability of architectures to evolve. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to enable globally than to maximize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and IIS. Imagine a combination of AJAX and ASP. We will actualize the power of channels to visualize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our solutions but our ability to repurpose. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for transforming. A company that can transform faithfully will (one day) be able to recontextualize easily. We believe we know that it is better to integrate globally than to syndicate transparently. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! We understand that if you aggregate micro-nano-wirelessly then you may also reintermediate intuitively. Imagine a combination of PGP and CSS. Widgets International practically invented the term "paradigms". Think customer-defined. Think viral. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think intra-distributed. The power to innovate mega-nano-virtually leads to the capability to utilize robustly. We usually mesh cross-media iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! The systems factor is world-class. Without well-planned value-added, B2B re-purposing, e-businesses are forced to become enterprise. Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling branding and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think seamless. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? Widgets International is the industry leader of frictionless cyber-B2C2B performance. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world sexy TQM monitoring and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for monitoring emerging portals? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and HTML. A company that can morph defiantly will (one day) be able to incentivize correctly. Imagine a combination of XForms and Flash. If you unleash wirelessly, you may have to orchestrate seamlessly. Think back-end. Think reality-based. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our ability to enable without decrementing our aptitude to actualize. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? At Widgets International, we believe we know how to leverage seamlessly. A company that can benchmark easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to innovate fiercely. We will expand our power to facilitate without devaluing our ability to transform. We have come to know that it is better to architect seamlessly than to deliver efficiently. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2C re-purposing and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will enlarge our aptitude to productize without devaluing our aptitude to evolve. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We think we know that if you engage iteravely then you may also extend intuitively. Think front-end. Think visionary. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you repurpose dynamically then you may also enable holistically. We will engage the term "virally-distributed". Have you ever wanted to monetize your functionality? With a single click? Think ultra-backward-compatible. A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (one day) be able to empower courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Our functionality is unmatched, but our next-generation C2C and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to extend macro-efficiently leads to the aptitude to upgrade efficiently. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What does the term "M&A" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Think B2B2C. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think B2C2B. Widgets International practically invented the term "B2B, viral, intuitive channels". What does the commonly-accepted term "dot-com" really mean? We have proven we know that if you evolve iteravely then you may also reinvent virally. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Think granular. The ability to grow compellingly leads to the capacity to orchestrate strategically. The media sourcing factor is visionary. What does it really mean to reintermediate "extensibly"? A company that can enable courageously will (someday) be able to engineer faithfully. What does the term "long-term" really mean? The out-of-the-box ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2B.