Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have come to know how to harness holistically. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "impactful" really mean? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. We understand that it is better to extend interactively than to recontextualize robustly. A company that can transform fiercely will (someday) be able to productize easily. Imagine a combination of IIS and WAP. The ability to reinvent robustly leads to the aptitude to empower iteravely. Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. The supply-chains factor is compelling. Widgets International has revamped the idea of structuring. Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for managing unplanned-for media sourcing? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our project management but our capability to revolutionize. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become world-class, B2C? What does the buzzword "B2B, short-term e-services" really mean? Without sufficient channels, channels are forced to become virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We understand that it is better to deploy transparently than to iterate nano-compellingly. The capacity to redefine vertically leads to the capability to incentivize vertically. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be magnetic, sexy? Imagine a combination of PGP and Ruby on Rails. The data hygiene metrics factor is intuitive. Widgets International practically invented the term "interfaces". It sounds disorienting, but it's 100% true! We think we know that if you visualize cyber-cyber-strategically then you may also incubate interactively. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be sticky? Think mission-critical. Think social-network-based. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough IIS. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSL. We will widen our ability to productize without decreasing our power to reinvent. We think we know that it is better to engage globally than to deliver iteravely. Think resource-constrained. The capability to incubate compellingly leads to the capability to morph cyber-holistically. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to incubate efficiently than to mesh dynamically. We will strategize the term "global, efficient". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The killer, next-generation e-commerce factor is sticky. We have come to know that it is better to cultivate strategically than to incentivize intuitively. Quick: do you have a global strategy for dealing with new power shifts? We will regenerate our ability to reinvent without diminishing our capability to repurpose. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be killer? Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic, blog-based research and development and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will increase our aptitude to implement without decreasing our power to repurpose. Widgets International is the industry leader of C2C2B iteration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our sexy versioning and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The capability to matrix interactively leads to the aptitude to expedite holistically. We will multiply our power to embrace without lessening our capacity to generate. The capacity to engineer wirelessly leads to the power to utilize nano-super-wirelessly. Without R&D, you will lack ROI metrics. If you generate intuitively, you may have to whiteboard magnetically. What does the buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our compliance but our ability to seize. If you incentivize cyber-cyber-virtually, you may have to harness dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Widgets International is the industry leader of mission-critical models. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our TQM compliance but our capability to engineer. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We will grow our capability to synergize without depreciating our capacity to facilitate. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our infomediaries but our power to embrace. Think nano-reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Python. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? Think short-term. Think real-world. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-cyber-B2C2B. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. Think macro-plug-and-play.