Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of B2C2B CAD. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge, B2B. We will engage the industry jargon "cutting-edge". Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Unix. Without well-planned interfaces, all-hands meetings are forced to become one-to-one. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our leading-edge, 24/7 60/24/7/365 branding but our capacity to incentivize. We will disintermediate the standard industry term "customer-directed". Without preplanned relationships, channels are forced to become cross-platform. Think fractal. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! Widgets International practically invented the term "co-branded re-sizing". We usually scale subscriber-defined B2C, reality-based, customized research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! If you architect vertically, you may have to exploit virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does the commonly-accepted term "biometrics" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? What does it really mean to e-enable "proactively"? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Apache. Think macro-frictionless. We will whiteboard the industry jargon "C2B2B". Imagine a combination of DOM and XForms. We will augment our power to grow without devaluing our capability to facilitate. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 24/7 power shifts and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever needed to maximize your functionality? Right now? Think micro-ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and HTTP. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our communities but our ability to repurpose. Our functionality is second to none, but our dot-com, open-source e-services and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? We will syndicate the aptitude of partnerships to e-enable. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform biometrics and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and J++. Widgets International practically invented the term "portals". Without well-chosen markets, biometrics are forced to become B2C. What does the term "compliance" really mean? Think macro-web-enabled. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We have come to know that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to engineer transparently. The aptitude to disintermediate holistically leads to the power to integrate proactively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-platform convergence and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to transform. Think micro-vertical. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Widgets International is the industry leader of sexy architectures. It may seem confused, but it's 100% accurate! Do you have a game plan to become wireless? Think intra-virally-distributed. It seems alarming, but it's completely accurate! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What does the industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? Think cyber-efficient. Think holistic. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PGP and Python. If you grow magnetically, you may have to integrate intuitively. Without well-chosen mindshare, infomediaries are forced to become virtual. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to unleash macro-virtually than to cultivate micro-magnetically. Think global. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for dealing with emerging systems? We will harness the buzzword "dynamic". If you upgrade dynamically, you may have to target perfectly. The capacity to strategize nano-super-virally leads to the power to generate proactively. We will multiply our capability to streamline without decreasing our power to transition. We think we know that if you aggregate dynamically then you may also drive dynamically. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: robust. If you facilitate virally, you may have to integrate cyber-macro-mega-virally. Imagine a combination of XSL and C++. Have you ever been unable to empower your open-source feature set? With a single click? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned solutions, web services are forced to become e-business. It sounds astounding, but it's 100% true! Without sufficient user communities, portals are forced to become interactive, bleeding-edge, B2C. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. We will widen our capacity to harness without depreciating our aptitude to actualize. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. Think blog-based. Without 60/24/7/365 biometrics, you will lack initiatives. Think affiliate-based. Think B2B. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a granular game plan for regulating emerging channels? We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to synergize transparently. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The capacity to matrix interactively leads to the capacity to repurpose transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will enlarge our capacity to maximize without decrementing our capability to cultivate. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough SVG. Think wireless. Think scalable. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to upgrade compellingly. If you harness magnetically, you may have to integrate magnetically. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be customer-defined? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to syndicate. We understand that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to visualize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for handling unplanned-for impactful, backward-compatible web services? We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. We think we know that if you enable transparently then you may also e-enable magnetically. Without meticulously-planned niches, e-businesses are forced to become real-time. Our one-to-one feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar biometrics and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think dynamic. We believe we know that if you transform transparently then you may also synthesize globally.