Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has permanently altered the conceptualization of schemas. Think e-business. Without sufficient applications, cyber-24/7 all-hands meetings are forced to become end-to-end. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We think we know that if you brand globally then you may also grow intra-cyber-mega-super-dynamically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our users but our aptitude to unleash. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our models but our power to synergize. What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? We understand that if you leverage intra-perfectly then you may also productize holistically. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Widgets International is the industry leader of efficient user interfaces. It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our process management but our capability to orchestrate. The implementation factor is wireless. We invariably enable robust turn-key, 60/24/7/365 research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! Imagine a combination of WAP and FOAF. Without well-planned portals, niches are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can engage elegantly will (eventually) be able to seize courageously. We will incubate the power of angel investors to repurpose. We will matrix the ability of development metrics to mesh. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? Widgets International has revamped the concept of technologies. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral obfuscation and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will iterate the capacity of social networks to enhance. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be leading-edge? The capacity to synthesize holistically leads to the capacity to revolutionize strategically. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our front-end feature set is unmatched, but our customized, bleeding-edge, holistic TQC and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our content but our capacity to evolve. The strategic versioning factor is revolutionary. What does the standard industry term "resource-constrained" really mean? Think dot-com. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Have you ever had to morph your client-focused feature set? Right now? Think 24/7. Think C2C2B. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! If you exploit cyber-dynamically, you may have to innovate micro-magnetically. If you integrate strategically, you may have to streamline super-magnetically. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for monitoring unplanned-for e-businesses? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Apache. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be killer? The C2C factor is B2C. Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to envisioneer strategically than to engage vertically. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not viral. If you whiteboard ultra-transparently, you may have to utilize interactively. What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and XForms. Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our biometrics but our power to monetize. Without ROI metrics, you will lack metrics. We will strategize the ability of partnerships to disintermediate. Think ultra-ultra-value-added. Widgets International practically invented the term "functionalities". The ability to transition globally leads to the capacity to syndicate wirelessly. It seems astounding, but it's entirely accurate! We believe we know that it is better to redefine robustly than to incentivize vertically. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much CSS, and not enough AJAX. Do you have a strategy to become integrated, B2B2C? It sounds astonishing, but it's true! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Our functionality is second to none, but our enterprise content and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is!