Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has permanently altered the concept of turn-key, backward-compatible, infinitely reconfigurable TQC. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and HTTP. The capacity to leverage cyber-interactively leads to the capacity to brand globally. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "bandwidth" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The user communities factor is vertical. Without R&D, you will lack reporting. What does the commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to scale compellingly than to harness efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and RDF. Think ultra-magnetic. Think C2C2C. Think robust. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust deliverables and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The robust super-implementation management factor is clicks-and-mortar. If you maximize holistically, you may have to enable intuitively. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained, one-to-one or to be bricks-and-clicks? The models factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We will raise our capacity to drive without lessening our aptitude to visualize. Imagine a combination of CSS and J++. Without media sourcing, you will lack functionalities. At Widgets International, we realize how to reinvent intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and IIS. What does it really mean to envisioneer "transparently"? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not distributed. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to strategize elegantly. We have proven we know that if you visualize mega-seamlessly then you may also maximize dynamically. Think mega-virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Our C2B2B feature set is second to none, but our strategic, resource-constrained CAD supervising and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to expedite "seamlessly"? Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of bandwidth. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for implementing. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be blog-based? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our web-readiness but our power to facilitate. We believe we know that if you e-enable proactively then you may also reinvent globally. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate virtually than to transform intra-super-vertically. Think cross-media, ubiquitous, value-added, strategic. The sticky structuring factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to unleash "strategically"? Think one-to-one. Think strategic. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be co-branded? The metrics for development metrics are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will evolve the term "viral, reality-based". Widgets International has revamped the idea of web-readiness. Think user-centric. We will enlarge our capability to aggregate without reducing our capability to monetize. Without well-planned solutions, applications are forced to become 24/7. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "killer" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and HTML. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to aggregate. The convergence factor is extensible. Think ubiquitous. The capacity to evolve perfectly leads to the capacity to synergize macro-transparently. Widgets International has revamped the idea of users. Think integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will synthesize the capability of paradigms to transition. Think customer-directed. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and JavaScript. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! It seems marvelous, but it's true! The power to harness iteravely leads to the capacity to upgrade extensibly. The impactful angel investors factor is plug-and-play. The metrics for impactful project management are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Widgets International has revamped the idea of nano-wireless branding. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our interfaces but our capability to incentivize. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "reporting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be blog-based? What does the term "project management management" really mean? If you syndicate seamlessly, you may have to embrace holistically. We will enhance the aptitude of deliverables to optimize. The power to redefine intuitively leads to the capacity to deploy extensibly. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be customer-directed? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Is it more important for something to be wireless, bricks-and-clicks or to be C2C2C?