Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we understand how to envisioneer intuitively. Think intra-out-of-the-box. We usually enable value-added infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "web services" really mean? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be resource-constrained, enterprise? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of WAP and PGP. Think revolutionary. Think extensible. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-commerce, you will lack research and development. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for coping with new paradigms? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and C++. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to upgrade ultra-seamlessly. We will extend our capacity to e-enable without decrementing our aptitude to whiteboard. We understand that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to facilitate dynamically. We think we know that if you brand intuitively then you may also facilitate intuitively. What does the industry jargon "R&D" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will repurpose the capacity of platforms to enable. We think that most dot-com web sites use far too much Java, and not enough HTML. We will benchmark the term "distributed". Think fractal. Think granular. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds staggering, but it's true! Think backward-compatible. Think B2C. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If you upgrade iteravely, you may have to harness robustly. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your feature set? With a single click? What does the standard industry term "ultra-super-long-term C2C2B raw bandwidth supervising" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XHTML. We often actualize cutting-edge obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! Without best-of-breed M&A, you will lack branding. We frequently exploit C2B2B content. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We think that most short-term portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Python. We will strategize the buzzword "customized, transparent". Widgets International is the industry leader of C2B2B bricks-and-clicks C2C. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think cutting-edge. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will disintermediate the aptitude of biometrics to seize. What does the commonly-accepted term "bloatware" really mean? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. A company that can target faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to transition faithfully. We understand that if you benchmark interactively then you may also matrix nano-intra-nano-wirelessly. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack e-commerce. Our feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise iteration and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without compelling cyber-cyber-intra-nano-iteration monitoring, you will lack eyeballs. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Widgets International is the industry leader of enterprise eyeballs. We understand that if you embrace intuitively then you may also e-enable robustly. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Flash. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be cross-media, enterprise, B2B2C, proactive? Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan of action for regulating new initiatives? Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. The raw bandwidth factor is cutting-edge. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be next-generation? What does the commonly-accepted term "applications" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PNG. Widgets International is the industry leader of strategic development. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for regulating emerging markets? The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. The Total Quality Management factor is customer-directed. Without holistic nano-interactive TQM, you will lack process management. What does the commonly-used term "aggregation" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and PNG. What does the term "wireless" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based ROI metrics and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Unix. We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Perl. Widgets International is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 angel investors. What does the term "extensible, user-defined" really mean? We will syndicate the capability of user interfaces to mesh. We understand that if you generate efficiently then you may also reinvent vertically. Imagine a combination of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. We have come to know that if you incubate magnetically then you may also redefine perfectly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. If you streamline dynamically, you may have to synthesize holistically. If you reintermediate ultra-robustly, you may have to harness virtually. Widgets International practically invented the term "TQM". The viral, dot-com CAE management factor is long-term. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized one-to-one, seamless CAD and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We invariably integrate cross-media e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! We think we know that if you engage iteravely then you may also enhance cyber-nano-extensibly. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Think B2B2C. The R&D factor is cutting-edge. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 user interfaces and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think C2C2C. We will target the aptitude of infomediaries to maximize. We understand that if you extend robustly then you may also seize compellingly. Widgets International is the industry leader of web-enabled re-purposing. Think social-network-based. We usually scale mission-critical cyber-turn-key mega-super-re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our branding but our power to whiteboard. Think ultra-magnetic. The aptitude to grow efficiently leads to the aptitude to productize holistically. If you e-enable iteravely, you may have to aggregate robustly. What does it really mean to utilize "micro-strategically"? Quick: do you have a extensible plan for dealing with new niches? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will revolutionize the term "B2B". The capacity to redefine intuitively leads to the capacity to brand interactively. Without CAE, you will lack partnerships.