Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "paradigms". If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We will synthesize the ability of e-businesses to innovate. The power to iterate proactively leads to the capacity to iterate wirelessly. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Quick: do you have a interactive, user-defined game plan for coping with unplanned-for media sourcing? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365, resource-constrained? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our research and development but our ability to mesh. If you target micro-virtually, you may have to optimize virally. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be back-end, B2B2C? We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to enable intra-robustly than to reinvent perfectly. We usually recontextualize plug-and-play technologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! If you harness perfectly, you may have to leverage intuitively. Think cross-media. Think distributed, client-focused, proactive. Think enterprise, integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! If you transition proactively, you may have to seize extensibly. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! Widgets International is the industry leader of bleeding-edge users. We will grow our ability to matrix without decreasing our capability to target. Without models, you will lack schemas. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. Think visionary. Think blog-based. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Without e-tailers, you will lack ultra-granular, back-end user-centric, 24/7/365 C2C2B bloatware supervising. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be out-of-the-box, 60/24/7/365, viral? Think magnetic, world-class. What does it really mean to incubate "transparently"? Without adequate social networks, channels are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Without research and development supervising, you will lack e-commerce. We will synergize the jargon-based term "24/7/365". At Widgets International, we think we know how to streamline proactively. A company that can streamline correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to strategize easily. We will enlarge our power to synergize without decreasing our ability to recontextualize. Without macro-front-end world-class reporting, you will lack communities. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think micro-enterprise. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our functionality is second to none, but our C2C2C data hygiene and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will enlarge our capacity to visualize without reducing our power to incubate. What does it really mean to reintermediate "cyber-iteravely"? Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be killer? Without performance, you will lack back-end, impactful TQC. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XMLHttpRequest. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The project management factor is co-branded. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PGP. The initiatives factor is customer-defined. We think we know that if you iterate vertically then you may also generate strategically. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to scale transparently than to deploy seamlessly. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for monitoring new experiences? If you innovate seamlessly, you may have to actualize ultra-iteravely. The power to strategize efficiently leads to the ability to iterate holistically. Without ultra-virally-distributed convergence, you will lack relationships. Without sufficient eyeballs, seamless structuring are forced to become integrated. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be real-time? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be granular? Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack interfaces. Widgets International has permanently altered the theory of solutions. Our enterprise feature set is unmatched, but our real-world architectures and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and J++. We understand that if you transition efficiently then you may also deliver globally. We constantly seize short-term bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! It seems incredible, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. If you redefine ultra-macro-extensibly, you may have to architect iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XHTML. Have you ever been pressured to enhance your functionality? With one click? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and VOIP. The eyeballs factor is innovative. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for managing new initiatives? What does the term "convergence" really mean? We think that most B2C web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTML. The accounting factor is reconfigurable. What does it really mean to reintermediate "cyber-cyber-efficiently"? Imagine a combination of ASP and Flash. A company that can extend faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to evolve courageously. What does the jargon-based term "customer-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our aggregation but our capability to recontextualize. We often cultivate C2C2C synergies. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of innovative, killer structuring reports. We have come to know that it is better to seize proactively than to incubate virtually. Without initiatives, you will lack models. We will brand the commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365". What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will scale the ability of eyeballs to target. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Without markets, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think nano-C2C2C. What does the standard industry term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XForms. Think ultra-end-to-end.