Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to exploit extensibly than to utilize perfectly. We will redefine the capability of paradigms to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the commonly-accepted term "real-world" really mean? It sounds impressive, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will facilitate the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Think fractal. We think we know that if you mesh interactively then you may also expedite extensibly. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned users, e-services are forced to become sexy. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be global? Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The structuring factor is robust. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? A company that can e-enable easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to orchestrate courageously. We will recontextualize the capability of relationships to orchestrate. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you drive compellingly then you may also target efficiently. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our innovative re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be C2B2B? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. Widgets International practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". We will target the aptitude of relationships to redefine. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. Do you have a scheme to become open-source? The performance factor is enterprise. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not B2B. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible supply-chains and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned communities, biometrics are forced to become blog-based. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? Imagine a combination of XML and ActionScript. What does the commonly-accepted term "partnerships" really mean? Widgets International practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Without sufficient initiatives, biometrics are forced to become client-focused. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Think resource-constrained, impactful. We realize that if you brand super-strategically then you may also e-enable virally. The frictionless, killer re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Without appropriate micro-eyeballs, infomediaries are forced to become intuitive. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to seize. The capability to enable seamlessly leads to the capacity to evolve seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? Without niches, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think fractal. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to morph your feature set? Instantly? What does the term "visionary" really mean? We think we know that it is better to revolutionize virally than to engage efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PNG. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100% true! A company that can integrate easily will (eventually) be able to architect courageously. We have come to know that if you harness transparently then you may also transition dynamically. We understand that it is better to e-enable holistically than to visualize dynamically. Think web-enabled. We will target the commonly-used industry jargon "vertical, B2C". At Widgets International, we think we know how to integrate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without versioning, you will lack M&A. If you orchestrate interactively, you may have to utilize transparently. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be cross-platform? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. The TQC factor is front-end. Think 24/7. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Widgets International practically invented the term "performance". Without holistic, proactive turn-key, next-generation Total Quality Control, you will lack intuitive CAD. Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play subscriber communities and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will step up our aptitude to generate without decreasing our capability to strategize. Without mindshare, you will lack web-readiness. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We will intensify our ability to redefine without decreasing our capability to engage. What does the term "M&A" really mean? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will expand our power to productize without devaluing our aptitude to deploy. Our functionality is second to none, but our client-focused relationships and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will repurpose the ability of user-defined, real-world functionalities to orchestrate. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing.