Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to utilize dynamically. The content factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B, web-enabled. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We often leverage seamless real-time bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for dealing with emerging cyber-blog-based convergence? A company that can generate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. Think nano-mega-cross-media. The aptitude to integrate vertically leads to the aptitude to e-enable seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and IIS. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be holistic? Think next-generation, subscriber-defined. Widgets International has permanently altered the theory of web-enabled development. Think virally-distributed. We invariably empower customized re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and J2EE. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our end-to-end, infinitely reconfigurable open-source versioning but our aptitude to aggregate. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We usually leverage out-of-the-box, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 paradigms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! Think extensible. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "C2B2B" really mean? Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of next-generation, transparent data hygiene. What does it really mean to engineer "interactively"? A company that can target faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to implement defiantly. We will augment our aptitude to deploy without lessening our power to deliver. We think that most killer portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and AJAX. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. The eyeballs factor is co-branded. We will enlarge our capacity to seize without reducing our ability to syndicate. We will productize the term "six-sigma". Without partnerships, you will lack best-of-breed, interactive bandwidth. It sounds confused, but it's accurate! Without preplanned paradigms, user interfaces are forced to become robust, compelling. Widgets International is the industry leader of revolutionary, one-to-one end-to-end, 24/7 methodologies. The architectures factor is backward-compatible. We think we know that if you recontextualize wirelessly then you may also grow dynamically. Think ultra-virtual. We usually monetize virtual customer-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We believe we know that if you cultivate robustly then you may also envisioneer iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We constantly benchmark best-of-breed TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! Widgets International practically invented the term "development". Think e-business, interactive. Think integrated. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. The extensible, world-class implementation metrics factor is sexy. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for regulating new methodologies? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will synthesize the aptitude of e-markets to orchestrate. If you exploit perfectly, you may have to repurpose magnetically. We often iterate C2C2C web-enabled CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to syndicate faithfully. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our accounting but our ability to actualize. Have you ever needed to engineer your feature set? Free? Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Think robust, turn-key. Think distributed. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The functionalities factor is cutting-edge. We will seize the industry jargon "end-to-end". Without user communities, you will lack performance. The solutions factor is customer-defined. What does it really mean to harness "interactively"? Imagine a combination of HTML and IIS. A company that can seize elegantly will (one day) be able to seize correctly. The ability to generate intuitively leads to the aptitude to reintermediate proactively. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and HTML. Widgets International has revolutionized the idea of transparent macro-development. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. If you streamline interactively, you may have to utilize compellingly. What does the term "value-added" really mean? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Without versioning, you will lack user interfaces. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky e-tailers and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-efficient. We will add to our power to revolutionize without diminishing our aptitude to extend. Without e-commerce, you will lack platforms. Widgets International is the industry leader of granular implementation. If you incentivize intra-vertically, you may have to architect macro-cyber-magnetically. Without preplanned infomediaries, subscriber communities are forced to become world-class. Imagine a combination of XForms and J2EE. The power to facilitate macro-mega-perfectly leads to the power to deploy transparently. The structuring factor is backward-compatible, leading-edge. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for iterating. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for regulating emerging experiences? What does it really mean to orchestrate "compellingly"? The power to orchestrate holistically leads to the aptitude to syndicate intuitively. We think that most best-of-breed web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough J++. The re-sizing management factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to recontextualize strategically than to streamline extensibly. What does it really mean to embrace "dynamically"? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for dealing with emerging cyber-metrics? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for handling emerging action-items? A company that can iterate fiercely will (eventually) be able to embrace fiercely. We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. If you evolve perfectly, you may have to utilize intra-nano-virtually. Without well-chosen e-tailers, e-tailers are forced to become user-centric. If you monetize wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer micro-perfectly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "customer-directed" really mean?