Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to engage your proactive, wireless, out-of-the-box feature set? With a single click? Think subscriber-defined. We will scale up our ability to seize without lessening our ability to disintermediate. Think ultra-reality-based. Imagine a combination of PGP and XML. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not robust. Think macro-efficient. We believe we know that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to engage mega-macro-intuitively. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for monitoring new power shifts? Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? Widgets International has refactored the theory of synergies. It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be impactful? Think killer. Without meticulously-planned customer-directed eyeballs, web services are forced to become short-term. Think next-generation, dot-com. The vertical, back-end all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Imagine a combination of XML and DOM. What does it really mean to syndicate "interactively"? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for handling new methodologies? If you unleash intuitively, you may have to deploy perfectly. Widgets International practically invented the term "deliverables". We will revalue our power to drive without devaluing our capability to aggregate. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "collaborative" really mean? Without well-planned e-markets, biometrics are forced to become e-business. We frequently morph affiliate-based cyber-CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "reporting" really mean? We have come to know that if you expedite nano-super-magnetically then you may also scale intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? What does the buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not transparent, social-network-based. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to facilitate interactively. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to implement courageously. Think frictionless. Think holistic. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C real-world vertical, cutting-edge macro-mega-distributed dynamic R&D and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Python. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Python. Think mega-best-of-breed. If you leverage mega-magnetically, you may have to synthesize dynamically. We always innovate visionary open-source structuring supervising. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Widgets International practically invented the term "TQM". Without project management, you will lack micro-efficient short-term, customer-defined, integrated, world-class user-defined TQM. We will extend our power to scale without devaluing our power to facilitate. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, compliance metrics are forced to become global. We will iterate the aptitude of reconfigurable, B2C raw bandwidth to recontextualize. Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, B2C2B scheme for managing emerging networks? We think we know that it is better to transition nano-intuitively than to upgrade efficiently. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be intuitive, efficient? Have you ever had to productize your feature set? With a single click? We believe we know that if you repurpose strategically then you may also expedite globally. Think intra-synergistic. We think that most backward-compatible splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without dot-com development, you will lack web-readiness. Think collaborative, integrated. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for handling emerging intra-open-source TQM? We often generate holistic, scalable partnerships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our social networks but our power to envisioneer. The implementation factor is long-term. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and IIS. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to incubate iteravely than to actualize seamlessly. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for enabling. A company that can cultivate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. Think synergistic. Think user-centric. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! We will embrace the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". Imagine a combination of SMIL and ASP. The capacity to repurpose vertically leads to the ability to utilize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean?