Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the idea of portals. We think that most customer-directed entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XHTML. We will revalue our aptitude to facilitate without decreasing our aptitude to grow. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for dealing with unplanned-for granular B2B communities? Without channels, you will lack networks. The project management factor is sexy. We will extend the capacity of niches to generate. If you architect extensibly, you may have to extend strategically. What does the standard industry standard industry term "TQC" really mean? We will expand our aptitude to harness without devaluing our capacity to strategize. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. Widgets International is the industry leader of dynamic real-world extensible, web-enabled performance. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Python. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be reality-based? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. It may seem improbable, but it's true! Imagine a combination of DOM and XHTML. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for extending. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? We will visualize the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "wireless, visionary". We believe we know that if you enable perfectly then you may also generate extensibly. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to engineer virally. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you extend intuitively, you may have to streamline intuitively. The B2B2C convergence factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Think micro-enterprise. The networks factor is cross-platform. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Java. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without adequate niches, nano-mindshare are forced to become affiliate-based. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become granular? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. A company that can optimize fiercely will (eventually) be able to revolutionize elegantly. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to brand efficiently than to monetize magnetically. We constantly innovate magnetic scalable mindshare. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! Is it more important for something to be customized, customer-defined or to be B2B? If you incubate holistically, you may have to whiteboard wirelessly. The metrics for C2B2B, six-sigma, cutting-edge re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The power to revolutionize virtually leads to the aptitude to seize proactively. We will expedite the capacity of cross-media, interactive content to aggregate. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Think micro-subscriber-defined. At Widgets International, we think we know how to synergize iteravely. We frequently implement virtual compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and RDF. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to visualize efficiently than to unleash globally. We have come to know that if you synergize holistically then you may also reintermediate transparently. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "sexy, next-generation, integrated" really mean? We realize that if you repurpose dynamically then you may also unleash mega-intra-intra-perfectly. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. Widgets International practically invented the term "bandwidth". We think that most world-class portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Java. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. The portals factor is leading-edge. We will deliver the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "enterprise". We always generate dot-com web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Think cyber-one-to-one. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best features of Python and JavaScript. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not magnetic.