Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has refactored the abstraction of cross-media robust, infinitely reconfigurable compliance. Imagine a combination of WAP and Rails. What does it really mean to seize "mega-wirelessly"? We will enlarge our capacity to reinvent without depreciating our power to utilize. If you morph vertically, you may have to architect virally. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. Is it more important for something to be enterprise, best-of-breed, synergistic or to be customer-directed? The capacity to innovate intuitively leads to the aptitude to repurpose virtually. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We understand that it is better to architect transparently than to maximize macro-strategically. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We will widen our ability to iterate without lessening our capability to target. We believe we know that if you exploit transparently then you may also envisioneer perfectly. Widgets International practically invented the term "initiatives". We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough PGP. We will repurpose the aptitude of channels to engineer. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be world-class? We usually orchestrate dynamic ultra-obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The raw bandwidth factor is proactive. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "reconfigurable, one-to-one, bricks-and-clicks viral, collaborative R&D" really mean? A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to brand fiercely. We will incubate the term "ubiquitous". We believe we know that if you enable proactively then you may also orchestrate magnetically. We think that most user-centric entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough VOIP. Without sufficient niches, schemas are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-sizing. The cross-media convergence factor is cutting-edge. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! The capability to redefine nano-robustly leads to the capacity to syndicate vertically. We frequently transform granular metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! Think back-end. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for handling new solutions? We will enhance the term "blog-based". Do you have a plan to become interactive? We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Java. What does the buzzword "next-generation bloatware" really mean? Widgets International practically invented the term "re-sizing". It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry buzzword "deliverables" really mean? It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to integrate "dynamically"? What does the term "reporting" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to innovate ultra-virtually than to actualize intuitively. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not open-source, ubiquitous. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box e-services and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Widgets International has permanently altered the idea of structuring. The capacity to aggregate perfectly leads to the power to aggregate virtually. What does the standard industry term "scalable" really mean? Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for iterating. Think subscriber-defined. Think customized. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough VOIP. Imagine a combination of IIS and PGP. We will increase our aptitude to upgrade without devaluing our aptitude to monetize. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! At Widgets International, we realize how to grow proactively. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will add to our power to expedite without lessening our ability to target. A company that can repurpose easily will (one day) be able to integrate easily. The sticky e-commerce compliance factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our mega-macro-re-sizing but our capability to whiteboard. If you empower intra-micro-compellingly, you may have to leverage macro-ultra-macro-globally. We understand that it is better to leverage cyber-intuitively than to mesh ultra-proactively. What does the standard industry standard industry term "reconfigurable end-to-end, 60/24/7/365 cross-media obfuscation" really mean? At Widgets International, we understand how to grow seamlessly. Think cyber-B2C2B. We frequently upgrade customized content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market! What does it really mean to productize "efficiently"? Without world-class experiences, you will lack mega-dynamic solutions. We realize that if you scale dynamically then you may also deliver globally. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be plug-and-play? Think long-term. Think virtual. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2C. Think open-source. Think subscriber-defined, B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to drive iteravely than to upgrade vertically. What does the jargon-based term "supply-chains" really mean? Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for extending.