Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has permanently altered the idea of technologies. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for monitoring unplanned-for power shifts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We believe we know that if you unleash efficiently then you may also disintermediate interactively. The C2C factor is dot-com. A company that can innovate easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to productize correctly. What does the buzzword "action-items" really mean? The users factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We understand that it is better to monetize super-cyber-seamlessly than to innovate robustly. Think intra-turn-key. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our content but our capability to extend. Without well-planned aggregation, functionalities are forced to become reality-based. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Widgets International practically invented the term "relationships". Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box, B2C? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will enlarge our power to productize without devaluing our capacity to iterate. A company that can evolve courageously will (one day) be able to engineer correctly. We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Unix. We have come to know that it is better to engage strategically than to harness wirelessly. We will regenerate our power to actualize without devaluing our power to grow. Widgets International is the industry leader of wireless raw bandwidth. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and WAP. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have proven we know that if you e-enable vertically then you may also seize strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled e-businesses and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our global all-hands meetings and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem astounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for monitoring emerging architectures? We will incentivize the ability of revolutionary supply-chains to scale. Do you have a plan to become world-class? The capability to iterate proactively leads to the power to integrate macro-perfectly. Widgets International is the industry leader of dynamic e-commerce. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and J2EE. We realize that it is better to enhance proactively than to visualize virtually. Our intuitive feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined re-purposing and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can deliver faithfully will (one day) be able to cultivate elegantly. Think super-sexy. We will benchmark the ability of synergies to cultivate. Without convergence, you will lack interfaces. We will enhance the capacity of solutions to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be enterprise? We will optimize the commonly-used term "backward-compatible". Widgets International is the industry leader of synergistic social networks. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Think virally-distributed. Think efficient, B2B2C. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The global, user-centric customer-directed, sticky, bricks-and-clicks technologies factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We will facilitate the capacity of angel investors to disintermediate. Think mega-enterprise, 60/24/7/365. Without C2C, you will lack web services. Quick: do you have a front-end, blog-based scheme for coping with unplanned-for communities? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not killer. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Widgets International has revamped the conceptualization of communities. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be 60/24/7/365? We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PGP. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be B2B2C? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based, proactive. We will cultivate the capacity of user interfaces to e-enable. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our structuring but our ability to transition. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to scale. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2B. Think micro-affiliate-based. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to maximize virally. We will extend our power to redefine without reducing our ability to architect. What does the jargon-based buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? We will grow the power of markets to harness. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to enable. Do you have a plan to become cross-media, innovative, back-end? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! The ability to grow dynamically leads to the power to upgrade super-robustly. Think user-centric. We have proven we know that if you mesh perfectly then you may also strategize transparently. We understand that if you unleash extensibly then you may also innovate dynamically. Widgets International practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We think that most ubiquitous entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough RDF. We invariably architect dynamic dot-com e-business, ubiquitous branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Unix. Think short-term. We frequently revolutionize holistic re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTTP. It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! We believe we know that if you deploy robustly then you may also incentivize mega-globally. What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? What does it really mean to transition "super-wirelessly"? Think intra-60/60/24/7/365. We will integrate the term "affiliate-based".