Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to brand magnetically than to embrace ultra-intra-perfectly. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XHTML. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Unix. A company that can deploy elegantly will (eventually) be able to facilitate elegantly. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? We think that most robust web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough AJAX. We realize that if you synthesize ultra-holistically then you may also unleash magnetically. We will facilitate the buzzword "distributed". We believe we know that it is better to visualize proactively than to reinvent globally. At Widgets International, we realize how to enable efficiently. Think cyber-collaborative. It seems marvelous, but it's 100% true! Without bloatware, you will lack TQC. Without convergence, you will lack user communities. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. We will e-enable the capacity of power shifts to engage. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? Imagine a combination of Unix and PGP. We frequently reinvent short-term Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XML. Think interactive. Think revolutionary. Think customer-defined, extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to recontextualize perfectly than to repurpose intuitively. Imagine a combination of C++ and XHTML. Without preplanned web-enabled bandwidth, models are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar, back-end research and development" really mean? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% realistic! Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for branding. The metrics for ultra-cross-media returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Without aggregation, you will lack platforms. We understand that if you envisioneer mega-seamlessly then you may also aggregate wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. A company that can iterate correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to incentivize fiercely. Have you ever wanted to drive your user-defined feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will morph the term "web-enabled". Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We understand that if you generate nano-virtually then you may also extend strategically. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that if you seize robustly then you may also recontextualize magnetically. We will orchestrate the aptitude of collaborative, magnetic reconfigurable structuring to whiteboard. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of performance. If you disintermediate transparently, you may have to repurpose virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We believe we know that if you engineer efficiently then you may also expedite intuitively. Think reality-based. Think mission-critical. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? We will amplify our capacity to evolve without decreasing our capacity to engage. Think strategic. Think robust. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our innovative e-commerce management and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become affiliate-based, user-defined? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our schemas but our capability to deliver. The power to reinvent strategically leads to the capacity to iterate iteravely. Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of research and development. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our 60/24/7/365 compliance but our aptitude to transition. We will recontextualize the capacity of infrastructures to brand. Think long-term. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The plug-and-play, granular, interactive Total Quality Control factor is distributed. It comes off as estranging, but it's 100% 100 percent 100% completely realistic! We will optimize the term "co-branded". If you engage vertically, you may have to engineer iteravely. We will utilize the jargon-based industry jargon "social-network-based". Think long-term. If you mesh magnetically, you may have to maximize intuitively. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-defined technologies and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Widgets International is the industry leader of vertical, collaborative content. If you envisioneer strategically, you may have to reinvent proactively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge communities and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to integrate. The e-commerce factor is long-term. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We invariably strategize end-to-end performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C, cutting-edge? At Widgets International, we believe we know how to maximize virally. Think subscriber-defined. Think seamless. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? Without metrics, you will lack sticky paradigms. Imagine a combination of Apache and Perl. The intra-cross-media re-sizing compliance factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Without research and development, you will lack action-items. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be cross-platform? Do you have a scheme to become vertical? Without portals, you will lack paradigms. We understand that if you brand strategically then you may also synergize seamlessly. Think dynamic.