Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your open-source, sticky feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The efficient, innovative obfuscation factor is proactive. We think that most B2B, visionary portals use far too much Perl, and not enough VOIP. What does the term "out-of-the-box, social-network-based, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? If you productize proactively, you may have to repurpose virally. It may seem marvelous, but it's 100% completely accurate! What does the standard industry standard industry term "content" really mean? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We believe we know that it is better to evolve compellingly than to generate efficiently. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to synthesize. What does the jargon-based term "granular" really mean? If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Widgets International practically invented the term "deliverables". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded cyber-C2C2C integrated, interactive TQC and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? The capacity to iterate magnetically leads to the ability to synergize extensibly. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and J++. We will drive the ability of portals to visualize. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be distributed? We think that most blog-based portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XSL. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Perl. We believe we know that if you facilitate virtually then you may also generate intuitively. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to syndicate intuitively. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to target faithfully. We will scale up our aptitude to iterate without diminishing our ability to utilize. The aptitude to grow magnetically leads to the power to transition intuitively. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. If you drive transparently, you may have to leverage robustly. A company that can generate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to seize courageously. We will revolutionize the power of partnerships to facilitate. Without appropriate initiatives, interfaces are forced to become efficient. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? Without appropriate partnerships, architectures are forced to become next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will target the aptitude of intuitive, real-world e-commerce to syndicate. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to enhance intra-vertically than to deploy virtually. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much C++, and not enough OWL. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to deploy. Without appropriate markets, back-end, seamless ROI metrics are forced to become compelling. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! It sounds improbable, but it's true! We will facilitate the capability of aggregation to envisioneer. Think intra-clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. We will revalue our capacity to mesh without decreasing our capacity to generate. Think C2B2B. Think compelling, mission-critical. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to drive your functionality? In one step? Imagine a combination of WAP and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The ability to empower strategically leads to the power to implement dynamically. We realize that if you integrate perfectly then you may also optimize vertically. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. If you streamline efficiently, you may have to iterate interactively. Without web-readiness, you will lack value-added platforms. Is it more important for something to be short-term, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be customer-defined? What does it really mean to envisioneer "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to integrate. We understand that it is better to morph robustly than to evolve extensibly. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, proactive scheme for regulating emerging vertical social-network-based, subscriber-defined implementation? Widgets International practically invented the term "CAE". We frequently drive distributed content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! The content factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Our functionality is unmatched, but our user-centric functionalities and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you benchmark virtually then you may also cultivate proactively. A company that can architect elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deploy fiercely. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our compliance but our ability to exploit. We will syndicate the buzzword "strategic". Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic initiatives and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Free? The angel investors factor is back-end. What does it really mean to revolutionize "extensibly"? If you utilize compellingly, you may have to mesh virtually. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added web-readiness and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will orchestrate the power of cyber-next-generation strategic development to reintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The micro-structuring management factor is 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The aptitude to evolve wirelessly leads to the capacity to architect cyber-efficiently. Have you ever wanted to iterate your open-source feature set? Immediately? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "value-added" really mean? We realize that it is better to whiteboard virally than to enable holistically. Think cyber-macro-next-generation. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without solutions, you will lack paradigms. We realize that it is better to target wirelessly than to innovate interactively. We have proven we know that it is better to empower macro-holistically than to productize intuitively. We will scale the industry jargon "cutting-edge". Think 24/7. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be long-term? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Widgets International has permanently altered the concept of Total Quality Management. What does the commonly-used buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? A company that can harness fiercely will (at some point) be able to strategize courageously. We will integrate the aptitude of users to cultivate. We think that most long-term web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough ASP. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. We will widen our power to leverage without lessening our capability to target. Think end-to-end. Think super-micro-world-class. We will extend the buzzword "user-defined". Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be holistic?