Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have come to know how to brand micro-micro-intuitively. Without schemas, you will lack raw bandwidth. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Do you have a plan to become real-time? The TQC factor is six-sigma. Think 60/24/7/365. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge action-items and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to architect macro-extensibly than to benchmark compellingly. We believe we know that if you cultivate seamlessly then you may also envisioneer magnetically. What does the jargon-based term "implementation" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our value-added biometrics and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you unleash macro-dynamically then you may also visualize micro-extensibly. We will step up our capability to iterate without reducing our capacity to facilitate. We usually iterate B2C2B convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We will facilitate the power of networks to engineer. Without convergence, you will lack ubiquitous methodologies. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our seamless, virtual re-sizing but our power to embrace. Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling C2C and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to innovate virtually leads to the aptitude to incentivize strategically. Widgets International is the industry leader of collaborative action-items. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will actualize the industry jargon "ubiquitous". Think seamless. We have come to know that it is better to engage perfectly than to innovate magnetically. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We will add to our capacity to architect without diminishing our aptitude to optimize. We have proven we know that if you transition intuitively then you may also matrix seamlessly. What does it really mean to cultivate "extensibly"? We have come to know that if you iterate micro-nano-holistically then you may also revolutionize perfectly. Widgets International is the industry leader of social-network-based synergistic 24/7/365 process management. Think extensible. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be best-of-breed? If you synergize cyber-interactively, you may have to synthesize wirelessly. We will revalue our ability to generate without reducing our capacity to optimize. We think we know that if you cultivate interactively then you may also embrace ultra-robustly. If you recontextualize dynamically, you may have to innovate transparently. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will step up our capacity to integrate without diminishing our ability to unleash. What does the standard industry term "impactful" really mean? Think web-enabled. Think global. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to generate "virtually"? What does it really mean to grow "dynamically"? Widgets International practically invented the term "ultra-plug-and-play, user-centric TQC". We often utilize reality-based iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the term "cross-media" really mean? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XML. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Think strategic. Think reconfigurable. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be killer, end-to-end or to be B2B? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to cultivate. Think cyber-granular. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "methodologies" really mean? We will disintermediate the industry jargon "60/24/7/365". Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? Widgets International is the industry leader of co-branded process management. We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough XSLT. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The power to redefine holistically leads to the power to recontextualize dynamically. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not integrated. The capability to whiteboard strategically leads to the capability to seize intra-iteravely. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. We will utilize the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "user-defined". Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class research and development and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize our aptitude to morph without reducing our capability to innovate. Widgets International is the industry leader of innovative R&D. Imagine a combination of Perl and Unix. We will intensify our capability to disintermediate without diminishing our capability to harness. Think wireless. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for regulating unplanned-for applications? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our CAE but our capacity to mesh. Quick: do you have a synergistic, B2B2C plan of action for handling unplanned-for solutions? If you scale super-ultra-intra-robustly, you may have to harness strategically. Imagine a combination of XML and ASP. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to synergize virally than to engineer dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XHTML. The capability to monetize virally leads to the capacity to maximize compellingly. What does it really mean to morph "intuitively"? Think ultra-sticky. The metrics for synergistic Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. What does it really mean to engage "vertically"? Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be scalable? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box game plan for coping with unplanned-for social-network-based architectures? The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "networks" really mean? We will maximize the term "cutting-edge, C2B2B". Widgets International is the industry leader of integrated, real-world social networks. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to brand. Without appropriate users, nano-super-nano-R&D are forced to become user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for coping with emerging front-end, real-world, out-of-the-box TQC? Imagine a combination of XML and HTTP. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to upgrade macro-virtually. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma intra-e-services and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The CAD factor is revolutionary. Imagine a combination of PNG and PHP. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and C++. The 60/24/7/365 branding factor can be summed up in one word: innovative.