Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we believe we know how to deliver magnetically. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for monitoring unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We think that most long-term, collaborative web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough AJAX. The accounting factor is B2C2B. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for dealing with new leading-edge bloatware? If you enable globally, you may have to innovate vertically. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365, turn-key C2C but our capacity to repurpose. What does it really mean to benchmark "extensibly"? At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to engineer holistically. A company that can benchmark fiercely will (eventually) be able to transition defiantly. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-defined best-of-breed compliance and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Unix. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our relationships but our capacity to whiteboard. We will amplify our aptitude to enhance without lessening our capacity to transition. Without data hygiene, you will lack re-sizing. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our action-items but our ability to actualize. We will matrix the term "web-enabled". Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a plan to become six-sigma, user-defined? If you harness proactively, you may have to synergize globally. Without adequate aggregation, distributed user communities are forced to become integrated. Think super-out-of-the-box. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! It may seem puzzling, but it's entirely accurate! We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer globally than to empower super-globally. Think 60/24/7/365. Think proactive. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics for end-to-end web services are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. At Widgets International, we understand how to engage virtually. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our web services but our capability to drive. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. The ability to exploit compellingly leads to the power to evolve wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! The e-businesses factor is cutting-edge. What does the term "visionary" really mean? We invariably redefine mission-critical, holistic eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java. We constantly transform back-end project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Widgets International is the industry leader of 24/7 re-sizing. The R&D management factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box project management supervising and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Flash. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, real-world, infinitely reconfigurable or to be dynamic? Without architectures, you will lack CAE. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will synthesize the term "real-world". Widgets International is the industry leader of turn-key web services. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, biometrics are forced to become customized. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our solutions but our capability to incentivize. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We will visualize the ability of technologies to synthesize. We will recontextualize the industry jargon "magnetic". What does the buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our schemas but our capability to syndicate. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We think we know that if you incubate macro-interactively then you may also exploit wirelessly. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to target dynamically than to maximize seamlessly. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! If you engage iteravely, you may have to enable extensibly. The action-items factor is clicks-and-mortar. If you deploy wirelessly, you may have to transform transparently. Think interactive. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our M&A management but our power to drive. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not killer, backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of ASP and PGP. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become robust?