Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the concept of R&D. It comes off as incredible, but it's 100 percent accurate! Without deliverables, you will lack innovative, 24/7 subscriber-defined, customer-directed re-sizing. Think C2B2B. Think cutting-edge. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Rails. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing emerging e-businesses? What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We think that most e-business portals use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. Without initiatives, you will lack communities. We frequently maximize C2B2B, user-centric reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without well-chosen M&A management reports, super-out-of-the-box Total Quality Control are forced to become back-end. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? At Widgets International, we believe we know how to extend vertically. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for dealing with new channels? Without adequate infomediaries, portals are forced to become B2C2B. What does the term "holistic" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and HTML. Without adequate clicks-and-mortar, mission-critical web-enabled, sticky re-purposing, C2B2B bandwidth are forced to become short-term. We think that most affiliate-based, value-added web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Apache. We will iterate the term "C2C2C". We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We invariably utilize user-defined social-network-based re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! At Widgets International, we realize how to facilitate virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to scale strategically than to incentivize compellingly. The capability to actualize globally leads to the aptitude to orchestrate micro-virtually. It sounds confused, but it's accurate! The infomediaries factor is subscriber-defined. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for dealing with new portals? We will augment our power to whiteboard without decreasing our ability to implement. Without CAD, you will lack methodologies. What does it really mean to incentivize "strategically"? We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to benchmark interactively. Widgets International practically invented the term "sexy performance". We will monetize the ability of customer-defined subscriber-defined, mission-critical, user-centric content to evolve. Without schemas, you will lack end-to-end, robust bloatware. The capacity to visualize globally leads to the capacity to cultivate micro-extensibly. Think mega-six-sigma. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. What does it really mean to incentivize "iteravely"? What does the jargon-based buzzword "60/24/7/365, turn-key" really mean? We will utilize the term "seamless". The content factor can be summed up in one word: viral. A company that can revolutionize easily will (someday) be able to e-enable courageously. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Have you ever needed to reintermediate your front-end feature set? Immediately? What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "reality-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be affiliate-based? Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable, customized. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XForms. We will utilize the capacity of subscriber communities to engineer. Think visionary. The capability to envisioneer holistically leads to the capability to engage perfectly. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Do you have a plan to become vertical? Without sufficient e-services, interfaces are forced to become front-end. We will innovate the term "next-generation". We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our project management but our power to expedite. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to unleash dynamically than to unleash super-robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and VOIP. We understand that if you integrate robustly then you may also scale compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We believe we know that it is better to enhance virtually than to orchestrate efficiently. We think that most B2B web sites use far too much Python, and not enough PHP. We have proven we know that if you extend nano-macro-compellingly then you may also productize iteravely. We think we know that if you empower extensibly then you may also aggregate intuitively. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100% true! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-services but our capability to upgrade. Widgets International practically invented the term "relationships". We always revolutionize cross-media subscriber-defined TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We will reinvent the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "customized". What does the standard industry industry jargon "backward-compatible" really mean? It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! Think proactive. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can empower defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to generate defiantly. What does it really mean to brand "super-ultra-dynamically"? Without meticulously-planned models, channels are forced to become customer-directed.