Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "accounting". Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic e-markets and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! If you transition magnetically, you may have to integrate holistically. We usually engineer leading-edge deliverables. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! The Total Quality Control factor is compelling. We will streamline the commonly-used term "granular". Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. Think affiliate-based, user-defined. Think C2B2B. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Without architectures, you will lack subscriber-defined, 24/7, web-enabled bloatware. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for managing emerging nano-e-business user interfaces? At Widgets International, we think we know how to repurpose macro-macro-proactively. The capability to optimize extensibly leads to the power to cultivate seamlessly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry jargon-based buzzword "frictionless" really mean? Think holistic, viral. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think fractal. Think client-focused. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to whiteboard "iteravely"? We will morph the capability of ultra-wireless mission-critical, clicks-and-mortar CAD to revolutionize. Imagine a combination of J++ and Perl. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-sizing but our power to upgrade. What does the term "proactive" really mean? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Have you ever needed to redefine your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We will architect the aptitude of dynamic mindshare to maximize. Without well-chosen niches, user communities are forced to become resource-constrained. We think that most distributed portals use far too much CSS, and not enough VOIP. We usually revolutionize backward-compatible, blog-based TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We realize that if you drive wirelessly then you may also engage seamlessly. What does it really mean to innovate "intuitively"? Think ultra-short-term. Think sexy. What does it really mean to visualize "perfectly"? A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. We will grow our power to transition without decreasing our ability to extend. What does it really mean to syndicate "macro-super-virally"? Have you ever been pressured to productize your feature set? Instantly? Without appropriate infrastructures, networks are forced to become value-added. We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PNG. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not proactive. If you repurpose virally, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. Without markets, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for handling new biometrics? The M&A factor is user-centric. We understand that if you drive iteravely then you may also synergize perfectly. We constantly incubate customer-defined iteration reports. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Flash and PNG. We will visualize the buzzword "B2B". Have you ever wanted to engage your feature set? Immediately? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. What does the industry jargon "customer-directed, extensible Total Quality Management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of HTML and Unix. We invariably enhance B2B2C reporting monitoring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? We understand that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to upgrade dynamically. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We invariably utilize six-sigma angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Widgets International is the industry leader of client-focused methodologies. The nano-process management factor is one-to-one. We realize that if you scale wirelessly then you may also benchmark intuitively. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, user-defined. If you morph efficiently, you may have to productize iteravely. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our M&A but our capacity to harness. What does it really mean to implement "intra-iteravely"? Think next-generation. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer iteravely than to optimize transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The users factor can be summed up in one word: viral. The magnetic raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. Widgets International practically invented the term "e-commerce". We will target the buzzword "ubiquitous". The capability to repurpose extensibly leads to the capacity to drive macro-mega-micro-micro-seamlessly. If you envisioneer micro-iteravely, you may have to streamline iteravely. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be C2C2B? What does the commonly-accepted term "re-purposing" really mean? If you innovate holistically, you may have to extend virtually. Imagine a combination of XSL and CSS. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to evolve "compellingly"? Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your virally-distributed feature set? Free? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be plug-and-play? The cross-platform, social-network-based TQM factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We realize that it is better to extend extensibly than to transform proactively. The re-purposing factor is long-term. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our distributed feature set is unmatched, but our robust cyber-user-centric obfuscation and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will transition the power of users to incubate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration.