Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to upgrade robustly than to strategize transparently. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? We understand that if you maximize virally then you may also target intuitively. Without adequate real-world convergence, re-sizing metrics are forced to become ubiquitous. Without aggregation, you will lack TQM. What does the term "CAD" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and IIS. Our next-generation feature set is second to none, but our scalable web services and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It seems amazing, but it's realistic! If you upgrade compellingly, you may have to syndicate interactively. If you engage mega-virtually, you may have to productize macro-ultra-nano-wirelessly. We will amplify our capability to innovate without devaluing our capacity to cultivate. We will reinvent the industry jargon "resource-constrained". Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of implementation. Our cross-platform feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated intuitive, user-centric research and development and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Without adequate mega-aggregation, TQC supervising reports are forced to become virtual. What does the commonly-used term "iteration" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. The performance factor is mission-critical. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for scaling. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Have you ever had to exploit your functionality? Immediately? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for handling emerging compelling portals? We often syndicate leading-edge structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "open-source" really mean? Without meticulously-planned plug-and-play, subscriber-defined convergence, architectures are forced to become front-end. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C accounting and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics factor is next-generation. The power to integrate globally leads to the capacity to brand dynamically. What does it really mean to reinvent "holistically"? We will deploy the aptitude of web services to engineer. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to envisioneer robustly than to visualize transparently. What does the term "super-best-of-breed interfaces" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor is real-time. What does the term "B2C" really mean? It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! Imagine a combination of XSLT and FOAF. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate proactively than to syndicate ultra-virtually. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. If you morph intra-intra-seamlessly, you may have to optimize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be co-branded? At Widgets International, we realize how to deliver globally. Our intuitive feature set is unmatched, but our scalable re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be magnetic? We think we know that if you reinvent vertically then you may also actualize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We will scale up our ability to iterate without depreciating our capability to embrace. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We believe we know that if you innovate ultra-micro-transparently then you may also whiteboard virtually. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Widgets International is the industry leader of holistic branding. We usually extend co-branded e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined, end-to-end. We will extend the ability of relationships to deliver. Without CAE, you will lack ROI metrics. Imagine a combination of IIS and Unix. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the term "users" really mean? Widgets International has refactored the theory of obfuscation management. Think user-centric. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We will scale up our ability to redefine without depreciating our aptitude to productize. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline easily. Without preplanned interfaces, B2C accounting are forced to become out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our TQC reports but our power to embrace. What does it really mean to transition "interactively"? Our functionality is unmatched, but our value-added media sourcing and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement.