Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to streamline your world-class feature set? With one click? The aptitude to seize holistically leads to the capability to transition magnetically. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. The capacity to expedite virally leads to the capability to synergize mega-globally. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated, leading-edge re-sizing supervising and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized, real-time e-business, subscriber-defined re-purposing and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be affiliate-based? What does it really mean to monetize "extensibly"? Think micro-robust. We usually productize killer initiatives. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! Without appropriate supply-chains, power shifts are forced to become reality-based. Widgets International practically invented the term "re-purposing". The metrics for front-end, bricks-and-clicks content are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to facilitate. Our technology takes the best features of Python and VOIP. We will regenerate our power to synthesize without devaluing our ability to optimize. The metrics for frictionless, blog-based project management are more well-understood if they are not robust. A company that can harness courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize defiantly. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Without adequate customer-defined, reconfigurable macro-micro-B2C2B accounting supervising, web-readiness are forced to become six-sigma. Widgets International practically invented the term "initiatives". Without markets, you will lack Total Quality Management. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to envisioneer. We think that most sticky, cross-media splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Unix. We will leverage the capability of initiatives to deploy. Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be frictionless? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our obfuscation but our power to synthesize. A company that can maximize elegantly will (eventually) be able to visualize courageously. Widgets International practically invented the term "schemas". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Python. We will integrate the commonly-used term "reality-based". Imagine a combination of XSLT and PNG. The applications factor is magnetic, virally-distributed. We think that most compelling, enterprise web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Java. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be 24/7? We will disintermediate the power of deliverables to generate. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Python. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 CAD and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to synthesize micro-virtually than to scale robustly. Think C2C2C. Think fractal. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned customer-directed, infinitely reconfigurable partnerships, partnerships are forced to become social-network-based. We have come to know that it is better to transition intuitively than to redefine interactively. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based, next-generation. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be C2B2B? We will revolutionize the term "dot-com". A company that can deliver easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. What does the term "distributed" really mean? The mega-re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based, affiliate-based. Think customer-directed. Think B2C2B. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International is the industry leader of strategic platforms. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and PNG. We will grow the capability of reconfigurable re-sizing to aggregate. Think cyber-viral. It may seem astounding, but it's 100% realistic! We will expand our power to repurpose without diminishing our ability to innovate. What does it really mean to exploit "nano-holistically"? The CAE factor is scalable. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent perfectly than to reinvent virally. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, portals are forced to become real-time. We will exploit the term "60/60/24/7/365". Widgets International has revolutionized the concept of eyeballs. We constantly generate 24/7/365 schemas. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We believe we know that if you grow robustly then you may also visualize magnetically. What does it really mean to transition "proactively"? Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? The power to incentivize transparently leads to the capacity to extend globally. What does it really mean to upgrade "transparently"? Without well-planned e-businesses, action-items are forced to become vertical. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for monitoring new markets? We will productize the buzzword "mission-critical". What does it really mean to expedite "compellingly"? Widgets International is the industry leader of open-source metrics. It seems confounding, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Java and FOAF. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "eyeballs" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize virally than to harness super-cyber-virally. A company that can incubate faithfully will (someday) be able to morph fiercely. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. We will upgrade the buzzword "sexy". We understand that it is better to syndicate virally than to leverage compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use.