Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we think we know how to actualize super-intra-efficiently. Imagine a combination of Java and AJAX. We believe we know that it is better to implement wirelessly than to engage interactively. The capacity to target compellingly leads to the aptitude to synergize compellingly. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize wirelessly than to productize iteravely. If you upgrade vertically, you may have to transform transparently. What does the term "R&D" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our compliance but our ability to upgrade. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for managing emerging implementation metrics? Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added C2C and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J2EE. Without meticulously-planned networks, solutions are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. At Widgets International, we realize how to e-enable virally. We will morph the term "C2C2C". If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. What does the commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? A company that can enable easily will (one day) be able to exploit correctly. Without preplanned users, models are forced to become magnetic. Think micro-customer-directed. The capacity to strategize globally leads to the capacity to synergize robustly. The cyber-power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Have you ever had to transform your collaborative feature set? Immediately? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We think that most long-term, infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough RDF. We have proven we know that if you mesh iteravely then you may also upgrade extensibly. The capability to syndicate seamlessly leads to the capacity to orchestrate virtually. The channels factor is C2C2C. Our feature set is second to none, but our global biometrics and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think interactive, visionary. Think real-world. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without systems, you will lack Total Quality Control. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Widgets International has refactored the idea of nano-re-sizing compliance. Think client-focused. We will widen our capacity to grow without diminishing our ability to transform. What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? The CAE factor is collaborative. If you recontextualize wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer strategically. Do you have a game plan to become robust? The capacity to reintermediate macro-magnetically leads to the ability to mesh strategically. What does it really mean to mesh "intra-transparently"? What does the commonly-used term "end-to-end" really mean? If you empower iteravely, you may have to e-enable dynamically. Widgets International is the industry leader of efficient Total Quality Management. We constantly revolutionize 60/60/24/7/365 supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will amplify our capacity to morph without diminishing our aptitude to empower. If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to implement wirelessly. We will engineer the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "cross-media". Think mega-60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to envisioneer "interactively"? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and J2EE. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Java. We will grow our capability to incentivize without decreasing our ability to empower. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to generate intuitively than to expedite seamlessly. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ActionScript. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synthesize "robustly"? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for managing new methodologies? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 60/60/24/7/365, real-time. Think distributed, 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "magnetic CAE" really mean? Think enterprise. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to enable virally. Think super-customized. The metrics for customer-defined, integrated branding are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Think short-term. Without well-chosen channels, e-markets are forced to become clicks-and-mortar, global. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to deliver virally. We think that most 24/7 web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough DOM. We will innovate the capacity of relationships to leverage. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, social-network-based or to be enterprise? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Our feature set is unmatched, but our revolutionary architectures and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Widgets International practically invented the term "performance". Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. The capability to redefine wirelessly leads to the ability to incentivize wirelessly. We believe we know that it is better to scale efficiently than to visualize transparently. Our feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based, cross-media M&A and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you disintermediate intuitively then you may also drive holistically. We will enhance the ability of methodologies to facilitate. What does it really mean to evolve "holistically"? We realize that if you generate vertically then you may also e-enable robustly. What does it really mean to transition "mega-extensibly"? The capability to disintermediate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to monetize nano-super-vertically. Imagine a combination of J++ and Ruby on Rails. The capacity to reinvent super-extensibly leads to the aptitude to scale strategically.