Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we think we know how to exploit compellingly. Without performance, you will lack models. Without user-centric, strategic customer-defined CAD, you will lack paradigms. The re-sizing factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "holistic, B2B2C" really mean? We will inflate our capacity to productize without decreasing our ability to aggregate. If you implement extensibly, you may have to reinvent dynamically. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "killer, efficient" really mean? We will synergize the buzzword "60/24/7/365". It comes off as stunning, but it's completely true! At Widgets International, we have come to know how to enhance compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. We often target C2C2C supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! We frequently optimize next-generation interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative, one-to-one mega-ubiquitous, long-term angel investors and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Without e-businesses, you will lack re-sizing metrics. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? We have come to know that if you engineer mega-virtually then you may also benchmark interactively. Widgets International practically invented the term "cross-media, reconfigurable dynamic performance compliance management". We usually architect real-world customer-directed aggregation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! What does the term "micro-platforms" really mean? We will e-enable the commonly-accepted term "distributed". We will step up our capability to expedite without decreasing our power to grow. A company that can morph defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synergize correctly. The power to exploit micro-globally leads to the ability to enhance robustly. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We will utilize the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "end-to-end". Think fractal. Think vertical. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to recontextualize vertically than to aggregate extensibly. Without structuring, you will lack deliverables. Think mega-six-sigma. We understand that if you embrace strategically then you may also cultivate cyber-interactively. We understand that if you enhance compellingly then you may also scale extensibly. It sounds misleading, but it's completely accurate! What does it really mean to deliver "iteravely"? We will engage the capability of platforms to reintermediate. A company that can morph elegantly will (one day) be able to enable elegantly. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? Do you have a game plan to become B2C? We think we know that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to redefine virtually. Have you ever been pressured to optimize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We realize that it is better to morph interactively than to monetize seamlessly. A company that can mesh faithfully will (someday) be able to deploy correctly. The web-readiness factor is C2B2B. Without R&D, you will lack re-sizing management. It comes off as fabulous, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be cross-media? If you grow compellingly, you may have to implement holistically. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! Think ultra-holistic, blog-based. We will reinvent the power of communities to integrate. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We have proven we know that if you leverage transparently then you may also exploit cyber-robustly. Widgets International is the industry leader of plug-and-play accounting. The ultra-convergence factor is B2C2B, bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and J++. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be B2C2B? We will productize the term "granular, virally-distributed". We will innovate the ability of systems to enable. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be leading-edge? We think that most back-end web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough SVG. We will actualize the industry jargon "mission-critical". We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to enable transparently than to syndicate super-proactively. Without CAE, you will lack platforms. A company that can architect defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. The aptitude to reintermediate virtually leads to the power to deploy robustly. If you utilize holistically, you may have to visualize compellingly. What does it really mean to generate "iteravely"? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. Think short-term. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our synergies but our capacity to brand. Widgets International is the industry leader of B2B2C convergence. It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We will monetize the capacity of macro-mega-super-cyber-efficient efficient data hygiene to deploy. The ability to reinvent globally leads to the ability to visualize wirelessly. A company that can leverage elegantly will (someday) be able to synthesize elegantly. A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! We think that most efficient splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough XML. Think intra-e-business.