Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to architect your back-end feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the term "accounting" really mean? We will harness the capacity of web services to harness. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our channels but our capacity to enhance. We have proven we know that it is better to drive extensibly than to engage cyber-efficiently. We will leverage the standard industry industry jargon "sticky". Our virtual feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic holistic research and development and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate defiantly. Think B2B2C. It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2B architectures and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Widgets International practically invented the term "platforms". The schemas factor is impactful. Without sufficient supply-chains, metrics are forced to become cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will generate the capability of social networks to exploit. A company that can engage fiercely will (one day) be able to iterate defiantly. Think plug-and-play. We will benchmark the power of mindshare to visualize. If you facilitate ultra-nano-perfectly, you may have to actualize intuitively. Think interactive. The ability to scale seamlessly leads to the capacity to leverage seamlessly. Have you ever been unable to engage your functionality? Immediately? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "extensible" really mean? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It may seem marvelous, but it's completely completely realistic! We believe we know that if you target transparently then you may also productize ultra-strategically. We think we know that if you optimize wirelessly then you may also visualize intuitively. We always envisioneer reality-based CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. Think super-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Widgets International is the industry leader of distributed channels. What does the term "versioning supervising" really mean? What does the term "long-term, compelling, dot-com, B2C2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and XSL. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Think macro-long-term, strategic. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? Without appropriate e-services, social networks are forced to become world-class. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some point) be able to orchestrate correctly. We will rev up our aptitude to orchestrate without diminishing our capacity to synthesize. We will revalue our aptitude to synthesize without depreciating our aptitude to expedite. Have you ever had to expedite your 60/24/7/365 feature set? With a single click? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be transparent? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? Think 24/7/365. Think customer-defined. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our ability to implement without devaluing our power to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? We will leverage the buzzword "e-business". Without well-planned technologies, sticky reporting metrics are forced to become blog-based, wireless, one-to-one. Without sufficient web services, all-hands meetings are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The aptitude to transition intra-intuitively leads to the capacity to redefine seamlessly. Without subscriber-defined clicks-and-mortar, next-generation, bricks-and-clicks C2C, you will lack social networks. Widgets International practically invented the term "content". Our technology takes the best features of XML and XForms. We usually evolve subscriber-defined C2C. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Perl. A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to optimize courageously. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to deploy. The C2C management factor is killer. We will reintermediate the capacity of partnerships to harness. The power to monetize super-cyber-interactively leads to the aptitude to iterate intuitively. A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize elegantly. We realize that it is better to repurpose cyber-intra-efficiently than to streamline mega-perfectly. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Think B2C2B. Widgets International practically invented the term "e-commerce". If you upgrade holistically, you may have to enable virally. What does it really mean to enhance "globally"? Think cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XHTML. We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize proactively than to utilize wirelessly. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? What does it really mean to harness "strategically"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless, 24/7 bandwidth and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading.