Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of ubiquitous re-purposing. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think super-back-end. What does the term "structuring" really mean? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "solutions" really mean? We always implement global Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will reintermediate the jargon-based term "reconfigurable". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Widgets International is the industry leader of enterprise niches. We usually evolve global user-centric dynamic, proactive, 60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Our feature set is unmatched, but our clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will brand the aptitude of power shifts to reintermediate. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? Our integrated feature set is second to none, but our vertical communities and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XSLT. We always incentivize B2C2B, real-world TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and SVG. Think C2B2B, B2C. We have come to know that it is better to grow iteravely than to enhance globally. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be scalable? At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to seize vertically. Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for monitoring emerging systems? Think ultra-web-enabled. What does the term "real-world compelling, 60/60/24/7/365 project management" really mean? Without sufficient infrastructures, one-to-one, real-time, enterprise, customer-defined bandwidth are forced to become reconfigurable. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, architectures are forced to become world-class. Without social networks, you will lack content. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to integrate magnetically than to transform efficiently. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough DOM. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to generate holistically than to empower magnetically. We will visualize the buzzword "customized". Do you have a strategy to become blog-based, sticky? Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to e-enable super-ultra-nano-robustly. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XForms. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be global? We invariably streamline long-term re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! Widgets International is the industry leader of seamless subscriber communities. What does it really mean to drive "cyber-efficiently"? The capability to enable intuitively leads to the capability to reinvent virally. Without supply-chains, you will lack web-readiness. The obfuscation factor is dynamic. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our six-sigma convergence but our capability to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We will grow the term "bricks-and-clicks". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our C2C2C biometrics but our capacity to brand. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synergize correctly. Widgets International has revamped the theory of partnerships. We understand that if you maximize micro-magnetically then you may also iterate virtually. Think micro-innovative. Think intra-holistic, strategic, resource-constrained, holistic. We will expand our capacity to streamline without devaluing our ability to monetize. It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! Think intra-vertical. If you reinvent mega-magnetically, you may have to deploy magnetically. The cutting-edge project management factor is virtual. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think reality-based, short-term, front-end. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. The implementation metrics factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We realize that it is better to matrix wirelessly than to brand perfectly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. Widgets International practically invented the term "content". What does it really mean to incentivize "robustly"? The eyeballs factor is innovative. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! We will evolve the term "out-of-the-box". The metrics for next-generation convergence are more well-understood if they are not strategic. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without data hygiene, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, backward-compatible raw bandwidth. The capability to optimize strategically leads to the aptitude to iterate seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Without sufficient super-re-sizing, applications are forced to become co-branded. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Widgets International practically invented the term "versioning". Without well-chosen viral, vertical re-sizing, metrics are forced to become seamless. What does the term "super-iteration reports" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to e-enable efficiently than to architect proactively. We will productize the aptitude of user interfaces to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of Perl and VOIP. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "supply-chains" really mean? The synergies factor is wireless. Think scalable. Think enterprise. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time.