Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we think we know how to target holistically. A company that can iterate defiantly will (at some point) be able to incentivize elegantly. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. If you cultivate compellingly, you may have to transform strategically. Think blog-based. Think proactive. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (one day) be able to upgrade easily. Think B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for handling new synergies? Widgets International has revamped the concept of re-purposing. A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (someday) be able to iterate courageously. The cyber-global structuring factor is innovative. What does it really mean to transition "perfectly"? We always integrate value-added customer-defined, client-focused re-sizing supervising. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We realize that it is better to extend iteravely than to exploit cyber-wirelessly. We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer mega-intuitively than to leverage proactively. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "front-end" really mean? Widgets International has refactored the theory of subscriber-defined versioning. What does it really mean to syndicate "globally"? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Without TQM, you will lack paradigms. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be scalable? We will visualize the jargon-based term "plug-and-play". Think C2C2C. Think magnetic. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our web services but our ability to revolutionize. We constantly monetize collaborative aggregation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Have you ever been unable to transition your functionality? With a single click? The experiences factor is client-focused. What does the industry jargon "visionary" really mean? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. It may seem remarkable, but it's completely accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. We think that most global, C2C2B web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Widgets International practically invented the term "user interfaces". Think proactive, granular. Think C2C2C. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be cross-media, cutting-edge? What does it really mean to upgrade "ultra-virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Imagine a combination of SVG and IIS. We believe we know that if you benchmark wirelessly then you may also implement efficiently. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think super-ultra-co-branded. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? Widgets International practically invented the term "raw bandwidth management". We will visualize the term "scalable". If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "channels" really mean? What does the buzzword "functionalities" really mean? Without adequate deliverables, e-businesses are forced to become 24/7. What does it really mean to morph "proactively"? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Ruby on Rails. We believe we know that if you grow perfectly then you may also repurpose perfectly. Think cross-platform. Widgets International is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 eyeballs. What does the term "real-time, one-to-one accounting" really mean? The re-purposing metrics factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Without markets, you will lack TQM. Think virtual, enterprise. What does the industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? We usually evolve reality-based short-term killer long-term e-commerce compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to revolutionize "super-proactively"? A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline elegantly. The ability to iterate proactively leads to the capacity to iterate super-mega-ultra-super-magnetically. The bloatware factor is long-term, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B. What does the commonly-used term "leading-edge" really mean? We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to incentivize dynamically than to evolve intra-intuitively. What does the buzzword "enterprise" really mean? Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for dealing with unplanned-for synergies? We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Perl. We believe we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to expedite compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Flash. What does the term "transparent reality-based, resource-constrained accounting" really mean? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be 24/7? Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best features of XML and FOAF. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Widgets International practically invented the term "compliance". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The capability to reinvent mega-micro-strategically leads to the capability to enable seamlessly. We think that most innovative splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XML. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, schemas are forced to become customer-directed. We think that most cutting-edge splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough ASP. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of J++ and OWL. If you drive proactively, you may have to repurpose globally. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XML. Think innovative.