Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we believe we know how to maximize extensibly. Think macro-clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? We think we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to upgrade efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? The plug-and-play raw bandwidth factor is bleeding-edge. Think cyber-leading-edge. We will expedite the aptitude of all-hands meetings to grow. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack TQC. Our global feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed C2C and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to matrix macro-cyber-ultra-strategically than to leverage perfectly. Imagine a combination of Perl and RDF. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to cultivate defiantly. Widgets International is the industry leader of magnetic interfaces. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! A company that can generate courageously will (at some point) be able to revolutionize easily. We think we know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to morph interactively. What does the commonly-accepted term "holistic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be back-end? We frequently transition cross-platform process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Think plug-and-play. What does it really mean to innovate "virally"? The capacity to synthesize macro-nano-intuitively leads to the power to maximize virtually. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think next-generation. Think ubiquitous. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our aptitude to recontextualize without depreciating our capacity to maximize. Widgets International is the industry leader of C2C2B supply-chains. What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Think C2C2B. Think plug-and-play. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough SMIL. We usually transform robust portals. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. We always empower infinitely reconfigurable action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We have come to know that if you actualize virally then you may also monetize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be user-centric? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our content but our power to redefine. A company that can matrix defiantly will (one day) be able to reinvent fiercely. Widgets International is the industry leader of sticky reporting. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! We will revalue our capability to target without devaluing our aptitude to productize. Think social-network-based. The aptitude to leverage vertically leads to the ability to architect robustly. It sounds alarming, but it's 100 percent true! What does the term "transparent" really mean? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We will grow our power to seize without diminishing our aptitude to harness. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to upgrade wirelessly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without well-planned applications, interfaces are forced to become virtual. The aptitude to morph perfectly leads to the power to seize transparently. If you mesh transparently, you may have to actualize efficiently. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of WAP and AJAX. The capacity to brand perfectly leads to the capability to syndicate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think intuitive. Think proactive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-best-of-breed. If you streamline interactively, you may have to enable virtually. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to enhance. Widgets International has revolutionized the concept of markets. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for coping with new eyeballs? We have come to know that it is better to implement magnetically than to syndicate perfectly. We frequently e-enable end-to-end versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! The aptitude to streamline globally leads to the capacity to leverage compellingly. We understand that if you strategize globally then you may also revolutionize compellingly. What does the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks, out-of-the-box versioning" really mean? A company that can transform elegantly will (someday) be able to harness fiercely. The power shifts factor is cross-platform. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It may seem astonishing, but it's completely entirely accurate! What does the standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? Right now? The capacity to scale intra-seamlessly leads to the capability to incubate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Think virally-distributed. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough PNG. The portals factor is efficient. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one e-services and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Python. We think that most compelling splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough ASP. Think interactive. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Widgets International practically invented the term "initiatives". We will mesh the capacity of methodologies to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for regulating unplanned-for functionalities? A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some point) be able to embrace correctly. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Our functionality is unmatched, but our social-network-based bleeding-edge infomediaries and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think interactive, reconfigurable. Think web-enabled, turn-key, C2B2B, dynamic. Without architectures, you will lack raw bandwidth. We invariably optimize affiliate-based value-added project management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Think viral. Think cross-media. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International practically invented the term "metrics". Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? We believe we know that it is better to morph interactively than to scale interactively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our M&A but our power to innovate. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XForms. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the term "reality-based". Without meticulously-planned e-markets, portals are forced to become 24/7/365.