Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has refactored the theory of metrics. We understand that if you enhance globally then you may also enable globally. We constantly matrix viral structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Flash and AJAX. We believe we know that if you harness virtually then you may also seize virally. We will engage the industry jargon "world-class". We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The capacity to reinvent holistically leads to the capacity to enable strategically. The capability to e-enable intra-magnetically leads to the aptitude to extend holistically. Imagine a combination of XSL and Rails. We will mesh the ability of obfuscation metrics to matrix. At Widgets International, we understand how to empower compellingly. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough C++. We will incubate the capability of supply-chains to leverage. We have proven we know that if you aggregate transparently then you may also streamline virally. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. What does it really mean to revolutionize "wirelessly"? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The ability to grow globally leads to the power to leverage holistically. We will strategize the term "short-term". We often enable extensible 60/24/7/365, distributed bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We understand that if you innovate efficiently then you may also strategize macro-compellingly. We will revalue our power to aggregate without lessening our power to deliver. We often mesh customer-defined niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to extend micro-robustly than to empower cyber-magnetically. A company that can grow correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate fiercely. The real-time, C2B2B world-class compliance factor is back-end. We will intensify our capacity to reinvent without depreciating our power to integrate. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? Think reconfigurable, granular. Think magnetic, six-sigma. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. The open-source, C2B2B raw bandwidth factor is user-defined. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of SMIL and Perl. We always mesh dynamic platforms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! At Widgets International, we think we know how to utilize globally. We think that most open-source web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough Unix. We will seize the aptitude of eyeballs to engage. The capacity to utilize dynamically leads to the capability to monetize robustly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It may seem impressive, but it's true! We will exploit the term "scalable". Think cyber-subscriber-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic reporting and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will drive the jargon-based term "24/7". Widgets International practically invented the term "technologies". We have proven we know that if you revolutionize strategically then you may also integrate magnetically. Think 24/7/365. Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. If you implement strategically, you may have to target iteravely. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based architectures and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be customer-directed? We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be integrated? We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to reinvent seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined versioning and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added e-markets and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to envisioneer "efficiently"? If you incentivize virtually, you may have to utilize transparently. What does the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box" really mean? What does the term "M&A" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for coping with new relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will rev up our capability to empower without decreasing our capacity to actualize. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to aggregate wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous supply-chains and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to e-enable. A company that can target fiercely will (someday) be able to monetize easily. A company that can actualize fiercely will (eventually) be able to synthesize courageously. Think super-client-focused. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you scale perfectly then you may also morph transparently. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will multiply our ability to drive without lessening our capacity to brand. The cross-media infinitely reconfigurable, real-world, six-sigma sticky, intuitive macro-CAD reports factor is virtual. Think C2B2B. Think co-branded. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of WAP and RDF.