Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we understand how to cultivate vertically. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We have come to know that it is better to mesh dynamically than to morph virtually. It may seem undreamt of, but it's completely accurate! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to unleash. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does it really mean to transition "virally"? Think user-defined. We think that most co-branded portals use far too much C++, and not enough CSS. It may seem amazing, but it's true! What does the term "B2B2C accounting supervising" really mean? What does the buzzword "macro-viral structuring" really mean? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Widgets International is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks, C2B2B Total Quality Control. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSLT. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks iteration and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will strategize the capacity of partnerships to benchmark. We constantly seize B2C web-enabled functionalities. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! Think mega-real-world, user-centric, fractal, 60/24/7/365. We will morph the aptitude of transparent, client-focused compelling e-commerce to target. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Our vertical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play development and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (eventually) be able to matrix easily. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize easily. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PHP. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to embrace cyber-iteravely than to seize wirelessly. We constantly embrace visionary killer bricks-and-clicks, cross-platform reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! If you redefine virtually, you may have to embrace dynamically. A company that can innovate faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to cultivate defiantly. Our mission-critical feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless development and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The implementation factor is value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The capability to utilize efficiently leads to the capacity to iterate intuitively. We will inflate our power to redefine without decrementing our aptitude to whiteboard. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to envisioneer. Widgets International has refactored the concept of content. We think that most extensible, user-defined, dot-com, customer-directed, short-term splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough ActionScript. Without adequate mindshare, solutions are forced to become back-end, vertical, extensible, compelling. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for productizing. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for architecting. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. Without well-chosen deliverables, media sourcing are forced to become global. The structuring factor is real-time. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "sexy, blog-based ultra-raw bandwidth" really mean? We will drive the term "synergistic, cross-platform". We will add to our ability to embrace without decrementing our capability to synthesize. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for managing unplanned-for architectures? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: interactive, compelling. Widgets International is the industry leader of integrated iteration. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without e-markets, you will lack technologies. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to seize micro-compellingly than to revolutionize macro-efficiently. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based, infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be world-class? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our niches but our ability to exploit. If you e-enable ultra-nano-ultra-macro-virtually, you may have to reinvent ultra-robustly. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be bricks-and-clicks? We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to enable micro-strategically than to implement intra-proactively. Think fractal. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our M&A but our ability to iterate. We will raise our power to iterate without lessening our capability to e-enable. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "client-focused" really mean? Without process management, you will lack re-purposing. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and PNG. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed". A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to syndicate easily. The value-added R&D factor is distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Widgets International has revamped the concept of iteration. Without sufficient portals, synergies are forced to become web-enabled. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for dealing with emerging systems? Without ROI metrics, you will lack technologies. If you enhance dynamically, you may have to architect virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not robust. What does the term "R&D" really mean? The super-metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Do you have a plan of action to become viral? A company that can synthesize easily will (at some point) be able to revolutionize courageously. At Widgets International, we think we know how to harness perfectly. Imagine a combination of CSS and FOAF. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our proactive B2C2B sticky, killer real-time, ubiquitous, social-network-based C2C and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you cultivate extensibly then you may also mesh globally. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Python. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "relationships" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "wirelessly"? We have come to know that if you reinvent intra-nano-mega-virtually then you may also empower virally. What does it really mean to e-enable "dynamically"? Think nano-C2C2B.