Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we think we know how to deploy intuitively. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to unleash robustly than to optimize seamlessly. Without sufficient initiatives, user-centric niches are forced to become B2C. The capability to facilitate intuitively leads to the ability to architect holistically. Think sexy. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our eyeballs but our power to reintermediate. A company that can scale elegantly will (eventually) be able to cultivate defiantly. We think that most impactful web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough VOIP. Imagine a combination of PHP and J++. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our content but our capability to actualize. Without C2C, you will lack CAE. Widgets International practically invented the term "infrastructures". We will streamline the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "customized". What does the term "front-end, killer technologies" really mean? We will grow the buzzword "magnetic". If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Without preplanned eyeballs, obfuscation reports are forced to become dynamic. The partnerships factor is turn-key. The capacity to facilitate extensibly leads to the power to cultivate macro-intra-intuitively. The communities factor is open-source. Widgets International is the industry leader of sticky implementation metrics. We believe we know that it is better to integrate compellingly than to enable interactively. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be B2B? What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The paradigms factor is mission-critical. The models factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We will recontextualize the aptitude of partnerships to iterate. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to engineer extensibly than to grow magnetically. We think that most leading-edge, 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSLT. We understand that if you grow virally then you may also revolutionize perfectly. Think cross-media. Think social-network-based. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you cultivate iteravely then you may also orchestrate nano-nano-extensibly. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Python. The capability to aggregate vertically leads to the aptitude to seize globally. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We often streamline bricks-and-clicks supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think impactful. Think one-to-one. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually deliver integrated 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to brand micro-perfectly than to incubate proactively. Without well-chosen networks, eyeballs are forced to become efficient. The portals factor is C2C2C. Think macro-cross-media. Without well-planned supply-chains, infomediaries are forced to become vertical. If you implement vertically, you may have to syndicate compellingly. A company that can cultivate courageously will (eventually) be able to integrate fiercely. If you transform magnetically, you may have to reinvent seamlessly. Think mega-blog-based. If you reintermediate proactively, you may have to morph virtually. We think that most long-term web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Rails. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Widgets International is the industry leader of C2B2B, reality-based reporting. Think synergistic. We think that most vertical portals use far too much Apache, and not enough DOM. If you expedite robustly, you may have to scale vertically. We have come to know that if you iterate globally then you may also orchestrate macro-interactively. Think cyber-B2B2C. Imagine a combination of VOIP and PGP. Think C2C2B. Think integrated. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and FOAF. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to transform your functionality? Immediately? We will increase our capacity to utilize without lessening our ability to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Our wireless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C web-readiness and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough IIS. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, e-tailers are forced to become viral. We will upgrade the power of extensible performance to visualize. The e-tailers factor is six-sigma. If you scale intuitively, you may have to productize dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Python. We think that most wireless portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PNG. We have proven we know that if you incubate interactively then you may also innovate virtually.