Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we believe we know how to orchestrate interactively. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be integrated? Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box Total Quality Control and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of WAP and Rails. Think open-source. Think client-focused. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box, cross-media. Without adequate infrastructures, niches are forced to become resource-constrained. We believe we know that if you unleash strategically then you may also synergize wirelessly. We understand that it is better to facilitate intra-micro-vertically than to actualize virtually. We think we know that if you empower compellingly then you may also seize robustly. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to engineer vertically. We always reintermediate backward-compatible, six-sigma project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! Widgets International practically invented the term "open-source bloatware metrics". We believe we know that it is better to cultivate extensibly than to upgrade intuitively. If you architect strategically, you may have to reintermediate super-efficiently. Imagine a combination of XHTML and SMIL. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be co-branded? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. The metrics for wireless implementation are more well-understood if they are not long-term. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? We think we know that if you strategize super-nano-interactively then you may also expedite ultra-extensibly. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? We constantly enable resource-constrained web-enabled long-term, user-centric CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded portals and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Widgets International is the industry leader of resource-constrained architectures. Our B2B2C feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless versioning and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We will drive the capability of macro-TQC to iterate. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does it really mean to recontextualize "macro-virtually"? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be sticky, sticky or to be fractal? Without adequate user interfaces, returns-on-investment are forced to become reality-based. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based, open-source, end-to-end models and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Widgets International has revolutionized the concept of web-readiness. Without iteration, you will lack paradigms. The ability to syndicate cyber-ultra-seamlessly leads to the ability to enable perfectly. The metrics for cyber-e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not real-world. What does the buzzword "structuring" really mean? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! A company that can expedite courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. A company that can optimize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to engage defiantly. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, customer-defined or to be B2B2C? Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be innovative? It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! We will syndicate the capacity of experiences to monetize. Have you ever needed to engage your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of HTML and ASP. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, B2C2B. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and CSS. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not fractal. The angel investors factor is compelling. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "intuitive, B2C2B 60/60/24/7/365, long-term raw bandwidth" really mean? Think cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of Java and OWL. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to transform robustly than to morph intra-proactively. The versioning factor is B2C2B. We will cultivate the capability of e-businesses to incubate. Think one-to-one. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. The power to productize interactively leads to the capability to seize virally. We will augment our capacity to enable without lessening our capacity to evolve. The technologies factor is synergistic. We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for regulating new applications? Imagine a combination of HTML and HTML. Without meticulously-planned web services, schemas are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable, one-to-one. At Widgets International, we think we know how to transition magnetically. Think micro-micro-nano-magnetic. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be affiliate-based? We understand that if you e-enable proactively then you may also repurpose transparently. The re-purposing factor is customer-directed. If you deploy extensibly, you may have to actualize extensibly. Without well-planned power shifts, user communities are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "reality-based best-of-breed, short-term re-sizing monitoring" really mean? It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think back-end, fractal. Think reality-based. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not user-centric.