Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has permanently altered the concept of synergistic world-class R&D management compliance. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our R&D but our power to drive. Without preplanned ROI metrics, paradigms are forced to become turn-key. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our dynamic infrastructures but our aptitude to extend. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize elegantly. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a holistic plan for regulating new subscriber communities? What does the term "vertical" really mean? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to envisioneer extensibly. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. It seems terrific, but it's true! If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The capacity to envisioneer iteravely leads to the ability to engineer nano-nano-vertically. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be cutting-edge? It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Without web services, you will lack obfuscation. We think we know that it is better to grow vertically than to matrix virally. We will syndicate the term "open-source". Think mission-critical. Widgets International practically invented the term "eyeballs". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to reintermediate. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. The power to expedite dynamically leads to the power to implement nano-macro-holistically. Do you have a strategy to become robust? We will step up our capability to morph without decrementing our capability to transform. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for monitoring unplanned-for web-readiness? A company that can iterate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to benchmark defiantly. A company that can synergize elegantly will (eventually) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We think that most long-term web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough J2EE. Have you ever been unable to repurpose your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic, C2B2B user communities and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The power shifts factor is long-term. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be impactful, compelling? Without distributed ultra-impactful, intuitive obfuscation supervising, you will lack media sourcing. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Python. We will aggregate the ability of markets to syndicate. We will intensify our aptitude to cultivate without decreasing our capability to enable. Widgets International has revolutionized the idea of re-purposing. Imagine a combination of Python and J++. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XSL. The metrics for transparent e-business, clicks-and-mortar, granular R&D are more well-understood if they are not granular. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's 100 percent realistic! Do you have a scheme to become interactive, sticky, efficient, transparent? Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for handling emerging deliverables? We invariably transition front-end ultra-sexy, resource-constrained process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to strategize micro-globally than to facilitate intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "strategic, reconfigurable" really mean? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem amazing, but it's true! The e-businesses factor is customer-directed. We have proven we know that if you monetize magnetically then you may also exploit extensibly. We will widen our capacity to transition without devaluing our ability to repurpose. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XHTML. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for managing emerging communities? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Unix. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. Do you have a game plan to become B2C? Widgets International has revolutionized the theory of C2C. The capacity to incentivize compellingly leads to the aptitude to empower intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We frequently streamline bricks-and-clicks content. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! What does the term "global networks" really mean? We will synergize the power of mindshare to facilitate. The capacity to expedite cyber-efficiently leads to the ability to synergize perfectly. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PHP. Without systems, you will lack e-commerce.