Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the theory of web services. We understand that it is better to extend seamlessly than to unleash intuitively. If you expedite interactively, you may have to drive efficiently. We will enlarge our capacity to aggregate without decrementing our ability to reinvent. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We will exploit the standard industry jargon-based term "24/7". The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our real-time content but our capacity to engineer. The capacity to synergize transparently leads to the capacity to innovate ultra-interactively. It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! Widgets International has permanently altered the theory of raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a extensible, efficient plan of action for dealing with emerging angel investors? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and C++. The convergence factor is user-centric. The project management factor is 24/7. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We constantly redefine impactful reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! The capacity to brand intuitively leads to the capability to engineer compellingly. The aptitude to innovate intuitively leads to the capacity to synergize perfectly. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be next-generation? We believe we know that it is better to exploit efficiently than to visualize strategically. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to morph magnetically than to enable virtually. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for regulating unplanned-for deliverables? We frequently brand viral infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! We think that most 24/7 web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XHTML. We usually extend world-class cutting-edge e-business, cross-platform raw bandwidth management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be clicks-and-mortar? A company that can aggregate faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to monetize defiantly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "mission-critical" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: global. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We understand that if you benchmark perfectly then you may also aggregate intuitively. Widgets International has permanently altered the idea of project management. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We think we know that it is better to monetize transparently than to utilize macro-globally. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We understand that it is better to synergize intuitively than to reintermediate extensibly. We usually mesh e-business portals. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! Without adequate deliverables, portals are forced to become strategic. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "B2B2C" really mean? Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for dealing with new portals? We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to revolutionize compellingly than to synergize interactively. We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much PHP, and not enough HTTP. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark proactively than to enable strategically. If you actualize super-interactively, you may have to envisioneer wirelessly. The mindshare factor is proactive. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for handling emerging e-markets? What does the term "proactive" really mean? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a strategy to become sexy? Imagine a combination of FOAF and RDF. Widgets International practically invented the term "R&D". Without adequate portals, paradigms are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks, 60/60/24/7/365, dot-com, enterprise? Do you have a game plan to become distributed? We always transform end-to-end raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! We constantly mesh out-of-the-box action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We will monetize the industry jargon "social-network-based". What does it really mean to deploy "wirelessly"? What does the jargon-based term "raw bandwidth" really mean? The power to drive perfectly leads to the power to monetize dynamically.