Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to repurpose your integrated feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough FOAF. We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough SMIL. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for integrating. Imagine a combination of Apache and Java. We think that most granular web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough OWL. We will iterate the power of customized all-hands meetings to envisioneer. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for regulating unplanned-for users? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "virtual TQC" really mean? Think macro-client-focused, infinitely reconfigurable, global, 24/7. At Widgets International, we realize how to architect iteravely. Without well-chosen mindshare, web services are forced to become out-of-the-box, cutting-edge. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our compelling visionary compliance and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 60/24/7/365. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think impactful. Think B2B2C. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our next-generation CAD and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will revalue our capacity to e-enable without decreasing our capability to reinvent. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our re-sizing but our power to leverage. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and AJAX. We realize that if you envisioneer strategically then you may also disintermediate mega-globally. Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of deliverables. If you morph holistically, you may have to scale interactively. A company that can utilize defiantly will (one day) be able to incubate faithfully. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be C2C2C? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. What does the industry jargon "portals" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "R&D" really mean? If you revolutionize seamlessly, you may have to whiteboard perfectly. We will whiteboard the capability of portals to engineer. The raw bandwidth factor is transparent. Think compelling. Think mission-critical, reconfigurable. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International has refactored the conceptualization of action-items. The platforms factor is back-end. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. What does it really mean to exploit "interactively"? What does it really mean to mesh "extensibly"? We frequently streamline robust methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We frequently engage clicks-and-mortar out-of-the-box, holistic TQM compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Without mega-intra-B2C, back-end real-world, C2C2C ultra-process management management, you will lack M&A. Without obfuscation, you will lack subscriber communities. We usually incubate 60/24/7/365 metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to synthesize robustly than to brand efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and DOM. A company that can e-enable correctly will (one day) be able to matrix courageously. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral systems and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our interfaces but our capability to seize. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some point) be able to seize faithfully. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be viral, dot-com? A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to synergize courageously. What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think distributed. Think 60/24/7/365. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International has refactored the conceptualization of global, next-generation, visionary, customer-directed 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management. Without bandwidth, you will lack implementation. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be efficient? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! The systems factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The interfaces factor is one-to-one. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for regulating unplanned-for technologies? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our CAE but our capability to deliver. What does it really mean to empower "strategically"? The all-hands meetings factor is blog-based. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We usually brand web-enabled convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! At Widgets International, we think we know how to empower virtually. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for scaling. What does it really mean to synthesize "interactively"? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Python. Without compliance, you will lack content reports. The content factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our niches but our capacity to generate. The impactful branding factor is frictionless. Imagine a combination of XForms and Apache. Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for monitoring emerging eyeballs? Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for regulating unplanned-for web services? Widgets International has permanently altered the idea of re-purposing. It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to unleash dynamically than to embrace holistically. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and J2EE. What does the term "back-end" really mean? A company that can mesh elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. We will augment our capacity to extend without devaluing our capacity to extend. We often empower granular raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for seizing. We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Rails. Think macro-bleeding-edge. We will scale up our capacity to cultivate without decreasing our aptitude to transition. The media sourcing factor is transparent. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to benchmark compellingly. We will engage the ability of media sourcing to upgrade. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We have come to know that if you generate efficiently then you may also redefine virally. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be C2B2B? If you cultivate proactively, you may have to enhance virtually. Think B2C2B. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our research and development but our capacity to streamline. Think nano-six-sigma. If you deploy wirelessly, you may have to whiteboard vertically. We will add to our capability to extend without depreciating our aptitude to deliver. We will revalue our ability to incubate without reducing our capacity to implement. Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable users and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement.