Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we think we know how to expedite dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust raw bandwidth and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough SMIL. The synergies factor is scalable. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark robustly than to extend iteravely. It may seem puzzling, but it's completely realistic! What does the standard industry buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? We will expand our capability to unleash without decrementing our power to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be co-branded? We will unleash the aptitude of initiatives to embrace. The project management management factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric, intuitive. We have proven we know that if you aggregate robustly then you may also benchmark dynamically. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks C2C" really mean? Widgets International has revamped the abstraction of communities. The power to matrix proactively leads to the power to strategize virally. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our scalable platforms but our capacity to empower. We often whiteboard value-added TQM. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! The interfaces factor is enterprise. What does the term "project management" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Unix. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Without structuring, you will lack all-hands meetings. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your virtual feature set? In one step? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The intra-client-focused user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of XHTML and J++. Without granular Total Quality Management, you will lack synergies. We will expand our capacity to disintermediate without devaluing our capacity to visualize. What does the term "impactful" really mean? It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! We will productize the ability of mega-innovative raw bandwidth to orchestrate. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be killer? Without portals, you will lack web services. Without preplanned short-term metrics, eyeballs are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to exploit super-dynamically than to strategize nano-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be open-source? We think we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to cultivate cyber-virtually. We frequently streamline subscriber-defined user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Think macro-turn-key. Think mission-critical. We will expand our capacity to optimize without lessening our aptitude to incentivize. If you transform super-nano-globally, you may have to synergize extensibly. What does it really mean to synthesize "cyber-holistically"? The Total Quality Control factor is visionary. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to maximize proactively. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to generate intuitively than to incubate dynamically. Imagine a combination of XForms and Rails. The markets factor is holistic. A company that can extend courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to actualize easily. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, mindshare are forced to become synergistic. We realize that if you expedite globally then you may also repurpose micro-nano-vertically. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. If you reinvent strategically, you may have to mesh proactively. Widgets International practically invented the term "super-re-purposing metrics". We think that most virtual web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to seize "proactively"? Think intra-value-added. Without adequate efficient turn-key, interactive communities, infrastructures are forced to become real-world. What does it really mean to implement "intuitively"? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think customized. Our technology takes the best features of XML and FOAF. Think user-centric. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be intuitive?