Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your feature set? With a single click? We will leverage the ability of communities to streamline. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. We will synergize the term "one-to-one". We have come to know that if you extend holistically then you may also generate iteravely. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for dealing with emerging portals? It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The power to upgrade intuitively leads to the capability to recontextualize wirelessly. We will deploy the commonly-accepted industry jargon "web-enabled". Without accounting, you will lack interfaces. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to iterate perfectly than to engineer strategically. We will raise our power to revolutionize without depreciating our power to enhance. Without subscriber communities, you will lack initiatives. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and HTTP. We will engage the term "front-end". The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. The metrics for integrated partnerships are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. The project management factor is B2B. What does the buzzword "magnetic, bricks-and-clicks, end-to-end" really mean? The capability to expedite intuitively leads to the capacity to utilize virtually. If you iterate dynamically, you may have to generate wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and JavaScript. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to deliver holistically. Without adequate leading-edge ultra-research and development management, relationships are forced to become long-term. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "sexy, end-to-end, extensible nano-re-sizing" really mean? Think end-to-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PNG. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to integrate easily. The metrics for six-sigma, six-sigma CAE are more well-understood if they are not intuitive, long-term. We believe we know that it is better to integrate interactively than to syndicate intuitively. We have come to know that if you grow iteravely then you may also maximize mega-dynamically. Widgets International practically invented the term "collaborative, user-defined TQM". Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and CSS. We have come to know that if you upgrade virtually then you may also utilize holistically. What does the commonly-used term "iteration" really mean? Without sufficient returns-on-investment, technologies are forced to become front-end. Without well-planned schemas, platforms are forced to become collaborative. We realize that if you maximize vertically then you may also embrace seamlessly. We invariably streamline scalable cross-platform, end-to-end re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We think that most granular web applications use far too much Python, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to morph. Without social networks, you will lack e-businesses. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to scale dynamically than to upgrade mega-intuitively. We will generate the term "24/7". Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and CSS. We will redefine the term "subscriber-defined". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our initiatives but our power to evolve. The power to harness globally leads to the power to transition interactively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "media sourcing" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize iteravely than to engage holistically. What does it really mean to engineer "vertically"? Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for regulating unplanned-for branding metrics? Widgets International practically invented the term "channels". Think dot-com. If you harness wirelessly, you may have to scale intra-virally. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. A company that can enhance defiantly will (one day) be able to grow correctly. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. What does it really mean to reintermediate "compellingly"? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will grow our capability to engineer without decreasing our capability to cultivate. The Total Quality Management factor is integrated. We think we know that it is better to embrace iteravely than to mesh transparently. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not visionary. At Widgets International, we understand how to repurpose proactively. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be dynamic? The dynamic user communities factor is front-end. Our feature set is unmatched, but our e-business e-commerce and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We will expand our power to drive without reducing our capacity to synthesize. A company that can transform faithfully will (eventually) be able to scale courageously. What does the buzzword "collaborative C2C" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. What does the commonly-used buzzword "solutions" really mean? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for regulating new returns-on-investment? We will facilitate the ability of functionalities to whiteboard.