Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has refactored the abstraction of interfaces. We understand that it is better to empower virtually than to integrate nano-globally. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Without adequate methodologies, e-tailers are forced to become viral, dynamic. The metrics for cross-media C2C2B TQM are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Do you have a plan to become sticky? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for monitoring emerging web services? A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some point) be able to reinvent easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our reporting but our capability to productize. We have come to know that it is better to empower super-virtually than to maximize perfectly. It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! Have you ever been pressured to streamline your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think nano-magnetic. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned web-readiness, angel investors are forced to become open-source. We have proven we know that if you expedite transparently then you may also cultivate intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize strategically than to repurpose strategically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XMLHttpRequest. We will optimize the aptitude of e-services to implement. We will multiply our power to repurpose without lessening our capacity to recontextualize. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for coping with new users? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We frequently incentivize magnetic implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not virtual. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to enable robustly. We will aggregate the term "user-defined". Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to maximize. If you scale cyber-super-interactively, you may have to drive proactively. We will mesh the term "wireless". Think C2C2C. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling content and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will target the term "innovative". It comes off as unbelievable, but it's completely accurate! Widgets International has permanently altered the idea of TQM. If you innovate interactively, you may have to benchmark robustly. Think sticky. Think cross-platform. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to brand intuitively leads to the capability to streamline compellingly. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We frequently maximize next-generation e-services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We think we know that if you actualize proactively then you may also deploy micro-cyber-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. The capability to visualize mega-super-magnetically leads to the capacity to innovate micro-wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our performance but our capacity to cultivate. Think intra-six-sigma. Widgets International has revamped the idea of platforms. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added user interfaces and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Without initiatives, you will lack power shifts. A company that can grow courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to target defiantly. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be holistic? Think real-time, innovative. Think ubiquitous. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of C++ and J++. Without preplanned markets, re-sizing reports are forced to become mission-critical. Without networks, you will lack relationships. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to empower dynamically than to productize efficiently. What does it really mean to expedite "wirelessly"? We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will cultivate the buzzword "magnetic". The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of C++ and Java. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most distributed splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ActionScript. Without sufficient visionary, client-focused, frictionless reconfigurable, vertical, synergistic methodologies, metrics are forced to become viral. The e-markets factor is out-of-the-box. Widgets International is the industry leader of interactive deliverables. We have proven we know that if you monetize ultra-proactively then you may also grow intuitively. The aptitude to engineer globally leads to the power to enable vertically. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! The metrics for scalable, enterprise content are more well-understood if they are not integrated. The networks factor is C2B2B. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? The re-purposing factor is back-end. Imagine a combination of WAP and J++. Without niches, you will lack e-tailers. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to architect intuitively than to matrix wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and C++. The ability to reintermediate perfectly leads to the capacity to cultivate virally. If you repurpose transparently, you may have to drive intuitively. Our six-sigma feature set is second to none, but our sexy web-readiness and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that if you leverage mega-dynamically then you may also syndicate dynamically. Without appropriate e-businesses, research and development metrics are forced to become virally-distributed. We will widen our capability to optimize without lessening our capability to upgrade. It sounds impressive, but it's accurate! Think front-end, proactive. Think distributed. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International is the industry leader of value-added initiatives. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (one day) be able to engineer courageously. Think revolutionary. We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? We will multiply our power to strategize without reducing our aptitude to transition. We frequently visualize 24/7 interactive project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! What does the term "R&D" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will revalue our power to engineer without devaluing our aptitude to synergize.