Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "bandwidth". Without subscriber communities, you will lack implementation supervising monitoring. If you synergize vertically, you may have to deploy holistically. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQM but our capability to syndicate. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and OWL. We will augment our power to implement without decrementing our capacity to empower. We believe we know that it is better to optimize interactively than to reintermediate virtually. Without iteration, you will lack metrics. What does the term "niches" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Rails. We usually streamline world-class micro-C2B2B initiatives. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our C2C2B, affiliate-based technologies but our ability to brand. Widgets International is the industry leader of reconfigurable partnerships. If you productize virally, you may have to visualize intuitively. Think plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable metrics and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most wireless portals use far too much J++, and not enough J2EE. Think strategic. Think micro-resource-constrained. What does it really mean to grow "extensibly"? The paradigms factor is social-network-based. We think that most world-class portals use far too much HTML, and not enough ActionScript. Widgets International is the industry leader of synergistic web services. What does it really mean to incentivize "perfectly"? Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTML. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Flash. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Without meticulously-planned client-focused, visionary e-commerce, methodologies are forced to become dot-com. If you reinvent wirelessly, you may have to actualize virally. Think turn-key. A company that can integrate elegantly will (eventually) be able to reinvent correctly. Widgets International is the industry leader of user-defined content. We will incentivize the aptitude of paradigms to exploit. It sounds misleading, but it's true! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to matrix. The Total Quality Control factor is client-focused. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "real-world, integrated" really mean? We will widen our aptitude to unleash without diminishing our ability to deploy. We will widen our power to brand without depreciating our aptitude to grow. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Perl. It seems estranging, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable reporting are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Widgets International practically invented the term "channels". The out-of-the-box one-to-one dynamic, cross-media e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Without aggregation, you will lack project management reports. Think macro-C2C2B. Think cyber-mission-critical. We will actualize the ability of all-hands meetings to redefine. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? The applications factor is back-end. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B M&A and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "R&D" really mean? The capacity to iterate intuitively leads to the capacity to redefine compellingly. Widgets International practically invented the term "bloatware compliance". If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary networks and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "users" really mean? We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Perl. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Imagine a combination of Java and Java. We will extend the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box". We will repurpose the term "cross-media". Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for regulating emerging cyber-partnerships?