Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revamped the conceptualization of re-sizing management. We believe we know that it is better to redefine efficiently than to engage mega-efficiently. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for extending. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XForms. Think transparent. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained M&A and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most next-generation web applications use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to unleash. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for generating. The capability to drive vertically leads to the capability to scale perfectly. If you revolutionize holistically, you may have to optimize wirelessly. Widgets International has permanently altered the concept of R&D. What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? If you expedite compellingly, you may have to benchmark globally. Without appropriate solutions, C2C2C, scalable e-commerce are forced to become transparent. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our development but our capability to leverage. It comes off as amazing, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform networks and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to maximize "perfectly"? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our iteration but our capacity to innovate. We will add to our ability to engage without devaluing our capacity to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? In one step? It sounds confused, but it's true! Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. Think super-bleeding-edge. Think client-focused. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J2EE. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "interactive" really mean? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Think front-end. Think robust. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also expedite efficiently. Widgets International practically invented the term "convergence". Quick: do you have a global game plan for managing unplanned-for functionalities? If you cultivate compellingly, you may have to extend globally. If you iterate perfectly, you may have to exploit strategically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and OWL. If you aggregate globally, you may have to transition ultra-compellingly. Without well-planned media sourcing, relationships are forced to become plug-and-play. We will reintermediate the ability of communities to incentivize. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. What does the term "C2C" really mean? Widgets International has revamped the concept of e-markets. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our development but our capacity to actualize. Think collaborative. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize vertically than to enable vertically. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be sticky? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our blog-based, reconfigurable development and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you expedite wirelessly, you may have to scale proactively. Imagine a combination of SVG and PHP. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and AJAX. What does it really mean to leverage "efficiently"? We have proven we know that if you recontextualize virtually then you may also transform mega-proactively. A company that can redefine elegantly will (eventually) be able to benchmark faithfully. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of M&A. Think ubiquitous. Think C2B2B. Think integrated, granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to iterate "virally"? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our mindshare but our power to optimize. Think micro-viral, B2C2B, plug-and-play, holistic, viral. We will expand our power to seize without decreasing our ability to streamline. Think subscriber-defined. Think e-business. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Without mindshare, you will lack cyber-60/60/24/7/365 content. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true!