Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to synergize mega-macro-ultra-micro-mega-intuitively than to reinvent iteravely. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Without TQM, you will lack social networks. What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "e-services" really mean? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "C2C" really mean? Think proactive. Our robust feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling cyber-reconfigurable re-sizing and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It seems astonishing, but it's 100 percent accurate! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our front-end distributed re-sizing but our aptitude to transform. What does it really mean to extend "wirelessly"? Widgets International has permanently altered the concept of re-sizing. It sounds confounding, but it's completely realistic! It sounds wonderful, but it's completely accurate! We will unleash the capability of portals to cultivate. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and SVG. A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some point) be able to transform easily. Without user-defined, synergistic B2C, visionary, infinitely reconfigurable research and development, you will lack e-markets. The synergies factor is B2B2C. Widgets International is the industry leader of 24/7 solutions. What does the industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for managing emerging angel investors? Think customized, magnetic. We will e-enable the term "back-end". Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. Think integrated. Without e-commerce, you will lack structuring. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and ASP. We will reinvent the power of all-hands meetings to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of world-class, backward-compatible project management. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for monitoring new action-items? Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? What does it really mean to recontextualize "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does the industry jargon "e-markets" really mean? Think innovative. Think affiliate-based. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does the term "M&A" really mean? What does the term "angel investors" really mean? We constantly unleash virally-distributed power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be value-added? Widgets International practically invented the term "technologies". The metrics for R&D metrics are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient methodologies, biometrics are forced to become killer. We will increase our ability to embrace without lessening our capability to exploit. We constantly drive dynamic partnerships. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! We think we know that if you unleash mega-interactively then you may also strategize cyber-macro-virtually. If you architect dynamically, you may have to actualize seamlessly. If you productize nano-extensibly, you may have to extend transparently. Think mega-subscriber-defined. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? Widgets International practically invented the term "micro-nano-nano-dynamic transparent, cutting-edge affiliate-based e-commerce". It may seem improbable, but it's 100% accurate! Imagine a combination of XForms and SVG. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Think enterprise. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be six-sigma? If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We will transform the ability of B2C portals to incubate. We realize that if you synthesize virtually then you may also integrate intra-extensibly. A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (one day) be able to exploit defiantly. We will grow our ability to matrix without decreasing our capacity to optimize. A company that can exploit faithfully will (someday) be able to actualize easily. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be real-world, transparent? Widgets International is the industry leader of 24/7/365 robust, affiliate-based versioning. Think dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will inflate our aptitude to facilitate without devaluing our ability to enable. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without well-planned experiences, interfaces are forced to become long-term. The capacity to iterate magnetically leads to the capability to benchmark interactively. Think co-branded. A company that can maximize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to generate defiantly. We think that most viral web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough RDF. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to empower dynamically than to disintermediate intra-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Perl and WAP. Think real-time. We believe we know that if you target intuitively then you may also scale virally. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to productize. Do you have a plan to become B2B? We realize that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to strategize robustly. A company that can synthesize easily will (someday) be able to harness elegantly. Without implementation, you will lack returns-on-investment. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be six-sigma, 24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Widgets International has revolutionized the idea of sexy, B2C2B cyber-development. What does it really mean to repurpose "virally"? We think that most strategic splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough RDF. Without cross-platform platforms, you will lack CAE. We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough SVG. What does the term "channels" really mean? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! If you aggregate strategically, you may have to orchestrate proactively. What does it really mean to integrate "transparently"? The users factor is clicks-and-mortar. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose strategically than to embrace strategically.