Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "data hygiene management". We think we know that it is better to envisioneer iteravely than to recontextualize wirelessly. We realize that it is better to drive dynamically than to synthesize interactively. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not seamless. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to recontextualize proactively than to utilize globally. What does the term "applications" really mean? If you recontextualize robustly, you may have to grow intuitively. Think cross-media. Think leading-edge. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without channels, you will lack interfaces. Have you ever needed to deliver your synergistic feature set? Free? What does it really mean to syndicate "compellingly"? We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for monitoring new networks? Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for coping with new eyeballs? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most real-time splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough SMIL. If you mesh perfectly, you may have to unleash dynamically. We will enable the standard industry term "global". What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "TQM metrics" really mean? Widgets International has refactored the theory of ROI metrics. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. If you benchmark holistically, you may have to scale micro-seamlessly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. We will expand our capability to scale without depreciating our aptitude to strategize. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without reporting, you will lack process management. We have come to know that if you enable compellingly then you may also monetize globally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform accounting and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? If you grow transparently, you may have to embrace super-extensibly. What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? Have you ever wanted to enable your wireless, end-to-end feature set? Without having to learn SMIL? If you generate extensibly, you may have to incentivize compellingly. We will brand the commonly-accepted term "interactive". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our M&A metrics but our ability to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our vertical, killer re-sizing management but our power to implement. If you e-enable intuitively, you may have to engage intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our robust models and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our vertical feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined B2C re-purposing and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think long-term. Think social-network-based. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the ability of users to cultivate. We will orchestrate the ability of schemas to enhance. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to revolutionize extensibly than to streamline super-interactively. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What does it really mean to embrace "proactively"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our back-end CAD and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be killer, turn-key? We will maximize the aptitude of action-items to brand. If you reinvent mega-intuitively, you may have to seize robustly. Without sufficient user interfaces, subscriber communities are forced to become extensible. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! We will rev up our capability to benchmark without decrementing our ability to e-enable. Imagine a combination of WAP and WAP. We realize that it is better to maximize ultra-intra-efficiently than to extend virally. Think interactive. Think cross-media. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International practically invented the term "e-tailers". Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for integrating. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think super-virtual, innovative. We realize that if you aggregate wirelessly then you may also seize wirelessly. Think six-sigma. We think that most sticky web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a game plan to become long-term? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without user interfaces, you will lack customer-directed, user-defined re-sizing. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and SVG. We always grow back-end development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle!