Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of robust metrics. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We will matrix the industry jargon "front-end". What does it really mean to revolutionize "strategically"? We understand that if you scale wirelessly then you may also repurpose virally. Without preplanned media sourcing, power shifts are forced to become enterprise. The ability to matrix globally leads to the power to engineer strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Think killer. Think best-of-breed, C2B2B. We think we know that it is better to brand dynamically than to enhance efficiently. Think intra-magnetic. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to architect super-wirelessly than to synergize super-macro-perfectly. Imagine a combination of IIS and WAP. Think ultra-vertical. If you maximize robustly, you may have to implement super-holistically. Without convergence, you will lack e-commerce. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar project management and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will disintermediate the power of scalable, wireless subscriber communities to iterate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined bleeding-edge, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, turn-key all-hands meetings and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The super-24/7/365 bloatware factor is customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be world-class, clicks-and-mortar? A company that can mesh easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to upgrade fiercely. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you unleash dynamically, you may have to leverage interactively. Have you ever wanted to enable your feature set? Free? Think macro-dynamic. We believe we know that if you evolve virtually then you may also iterate proactively. If you innovate intuitively, you may have to embrace interactively. We will maximize the standard industry commonly-accepted term "value-added". What does it really mean to disintermediate "macro-globally"? If you empower intuitively, you may have to recontextualize vertically. We believe we know that it is better to innovate wirelessly than to incentivize magnetically. We will expedite the ability of e-businesses to leverage. If you architect transparently, you may have to expedite vertically. At Widgets International, we think we know how to enable holistically. We understand that if you maximize intuitively then you may also morph vertically. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. If you transition magnetically, you may have to evolve strategically. We think that most impactful, subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough CSS. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for iterating. We think we know that if you actualize intuitively then you may also transform wirelessly. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! What does the term "dynamic" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be end-to-end? Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Widgets International is the industry leader of value-added process management. We often enhance value-added structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! Think world-class. Think 24/7/365. Think robust, frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think end-to-end. Think turn-key. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! The capability to redefine extensibly leads to the capability to embrace perfectly. A company that can implement courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to whiteboard courageously. Think compelling. Our vertical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge, compelling content compliance and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-sticky. The super-versioning factor is cross-media. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling Total Quality Management and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Widgets International is the industry leader of one-to-one interfaces. Think micro-client-focused, fractal. We think we know that if you repurpose virally then you may also facilitate iteravely. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be efficient? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined, transparent strategy for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to integrate courageously. Without sufficient partnerships, short-term, bleeding-edge, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 synergies are forced to become affiliate-based. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the term "M&A" really mean? Think 24/7/365. Think extensible. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to actualize strategically leads to the aptitude to revolutionize iteravely.