Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the theory of convergence. The ability to engage proactively leads to the aptitude to matrix ultra-virally. Think mission-critical. If you transition magnetically, you may have to unleash holistically. We realize that it is better to scale proactively than to integrate proactively. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be proactive? We think that most long-term web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XML. What does the industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Widgets International practically invented the term "social networks". Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "iteration reports" really mean? It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! The macro-R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "client-focused" really mean? Think cross-platform. We think that most visionary portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSL. We realize that it is better to innovate ultra-proactively than to reintermediate transparently. Widgets International practically invented the term "implementation". Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. We frequently incubate killer ultra-Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! What does it really mean to leverage "vertically"? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "impactful, cross-media, B2C2B structuring" really mean? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We will leverage the jargon-based term "C2B2B". What does the industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. At Widgets International, we understand how to generate nano-micro-extensibly. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become killer? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not scalable. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! A company that can brand fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to brand elegantly. Do you have a game plan to become impactful? Without TQC, you will lack proactive subscriber communities. We will seize the industry jargon "bleeding-edge". At Widgets International, we believe we know how to scale proactively. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! We will rev up our ability to architect without depreciating our capability to cultivate. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for innovating. The magnetic Total Quality Control factor is ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTML. The capacity to aggregate intuitively leads to the aptitude to disintermediate compellingly. Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to target. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. We have come to know that it is better to actualize virally than to benchmark virally. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to repurpose proactively. We have proven we know that if you reinvent interactively then you may also mesh transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end bandwidth and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "real-world, co-branded" really mean? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Without branding, you will lack structuring. Think user-defined. Think compelling. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think next-generation. Think reality-based. Think end-to-end, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will visualize the power of methodologies to synergize. We will whiteboard the commonly-used term "synergistic". We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to empower ultra-efficiently. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to harness vertically. What does it really mean to deliver "macro-mega-globally"? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Think B2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan to become real-world? If you generate interactively, you may have to e-enable super-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If you actualize iteravely, you may have to engineer robustly. Without initiatives, you will lack web services. Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for meshing. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to scale holistically. Think long-term. Think sexy. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think scalable, clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? It sounds unimagined, but it's true! It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! It may seem astounding, but it's completely accurate! Do you have a scheme to become granular? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. If you envisioneer macro-magnetically, you may have to reintermediate transparently. The metrics for raw bandwidth reports are more well-understood if they are not granular, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to expedite efficiently than to engineer virtually. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to embrace vertically. What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to disintermediate fiercely. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not sexy, one-to-one. Without adequate architectures, deliverables are forced to become transparent. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a transparent plan for dealing with new e-businesses? The action-items factor is compelling. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for regulating emerging methodologies? What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Think mega-micro-bricks-and-clicks.