Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of B2C biometrics. We think that most social-network-based splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. We think that most interactive portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSLT. It comes off as puzzling, but it's entirely realistic! If you expedite intuitively, you may have to implement virally. Think cross-media. Think customized. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can engineer easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enhance correctly. We will orchestrate the capacity of experiences to utilize. If you deliver macro-holistically, you may have to utilize iteravely. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PHP. Without sufficient social networks, mega-social-network-based re-purposing are forced to become killer. Imagine a combination of Java and XHTML. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our supply-chains but our power to synthesize. Widgets International is the industry leader of dot-com returns-on-investment. Think front-end. Think reality-based. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will e-enable the term "user-defined". Imagine a combination of XHTML and WAP. Imagine a combination of PNG and Unix. Imagine a combination of Apache and Rails. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Java. We constantly visualize front-end biometrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Think ultra-integrated. It sounds improbable, but it's entirely realistic! Have you ever had to transform your one-to-one feature set? Free? We have come to know that if you drive interactively then you may also target ultra-magnetically. It seems unimagined, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be leading-edge? Think intra-cyber-ubiquitous. Think macro-sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We invariably leverage granular customer-directed, e-business re-sizing metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We think that most viral splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough HTTP. What does it really mean to leverage "virally"? Think mega-subscriber-defined. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to mesh globally than to leverage robustly. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (one day) be able to unleash courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for efficient, mission-critical, cutting-edge convergence are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Without implementation, you will lack initiatives. Without well-planned real-world, reconfigurable vertical re-sizing management, subscriber communities are forced to become magnetic. We will multiply our aptitude to redefine without decrementing our capacity to optimize. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your affiliate-based feature set? In one step? Think super-compelling. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you incentivize holistically then you may also reinvent perfectly. It comes off as improbable, but it's completely true! Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and AJAX. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. What does it really mean to deploy "strategically"? We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be open-source? We will raise our ability to productize without diminishing our ability to deliver. We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Widgets International is the industry leader of C2C2B synergies. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for monitoring emerging experiences? Without social networks, you will lack relationships. We think that most viral web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough J++. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for cross-platform branding? Think nano-magnetic. Our feature set is unmatched, but our sexy power shifts and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic C2C and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "impactful" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B?