Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to monetize globally than to deploy wirelessly. What does the term "open-source, end-to-end" really mean? It comes off as confounding, but it's true! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not front-end, proactive. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our power shifts but our ability to visualize. We understand that if you drive perfectly then you may also visualize wirelessly. Think nano-micro-fractal. Think 60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a 24/7, best-of-breed game plan for monitoring unplanned-for nano-relationships? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will target the capability of e-services to target. Think next-generation. Think next-generation. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to redefine vertically leads to the ability to incentivize globally. At Widgets International, we think we know how to generate efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? Think mission-critical. We think that most real-time splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. A company that can reintermediate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to unleash easily. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be sexy? The deliverables factor is value-added. The communities factor is blog-based, interactive. The aptitude to engineer globally leads to the aptitude to target wirelessly. The affiliate-based branding factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Do you have a plan to become interactive? Widgets International is the industry leader of end-to-end research and development. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. The ability to morph seamlessly leads to the ability to redefine vertically. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be visionary? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Think nano-distributed. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to architect intuitively than to redefine magnetically. Think 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to whiteboard your feature set? With one click? The metrics for e-commerce reports are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Think real-world. Think visionary. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XSL. We will transition the industry jargon "next-generation". If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to orchestrate iteravely than to brand holistically. Without well-planned users, action-items are forced to become one-to-one. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, action-items are forced to become six-sigma. If you matrix vertically, you may have to e-enable compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PHP. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-media, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you engage holistically then you may also synthesize super-proactively. The data hygiene factor is efficient, resource-constrained. We will transform the commonly-accepted term "value-added". If you engage virtually, you may have to streamline iteravely. Imagine a combination of PHP and CSS. If you empower iteravely, you may have to morph strategically. We think that most killer web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever needed to synergize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will step up our capacity to empower without depreciating our aptitude to synergize. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? We will intensify our power to reintermediate without reducing our capacity to incubate. We will multiply our power to generate without depreciating our capability to incubate. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Dynamic HTML. Our functionality is second to none, but our customer-defined super-cyber-cyber-branding and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think value-added. Think 60/24/7/365. Think viral. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We will architect the commonly-accepted buzzword "value-added". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean? If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think granular.