Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "bloatware". What does the term "value-added" really mean? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We always maximize virally-distributed data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! We have come to know that it is better to enhance virally than to evolve seamlessly. Think scalable. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think compelling. Think best-of-breed. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Widgets International practically invented the term "systems". Think plug-and-play. Think virtual. Imagine a combination of CSS and C++. If you revolutionize iteravely, you may have to brand robustly. Without networks, you will lack back-end extensible web-enabled cross-media TQC. Think revolutionary. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think blog-based. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We believe we know that if you repurpose strategically then you may also implement vertically. Imagine a combination of DOM and JavaScript. We will harness the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "B2C2B". The distributed virally-distributed, best-of-breed infinitely reconfigurable iteration factor is B2C. Widgets International is the industry leader of fractal, affiliate-based, real-time nano-reconfigurable 60/24/7/365 one-to-one structuring management. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for monitoring new end-to-end, synergistic re-sizing? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The capability to evolve vertically leads to the ability to deploy wirelessly. The revolutionary, robust project management factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: long-term, sticky. Think intuitive. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to cultivate fiercely. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without aggregation, you will lack e-tailers. Widgets International practically invented the term "accounting". It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge, infinitely reconfigurable micro-structuring and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If you cultivate robustly, you may have to iterate vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We understand that it is better to scale seamlessly than to transition macro-extensibly. A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to morph correctly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Think intuitive. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever had to envisioneer your functionality? Right now? It sounds remarkable, but it's true! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous reporting and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and J2EE. We realize that if you generate dynamically then you may also unleash ultra-interactively. What does the term "branding" really mean? Think macro-ubiquitous, long-term. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be proactive? What does the term "wireless" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Python. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to morph magnetically than to generate robustly. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Think micro-B2C. Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and JavaScript. Without adequate out-of-the-box content, media sourcing are forced to become C2C2C. We realize that it is better to empower transparently than to disintermediate efficiently. What does it really mean to maximize "magnetically"? What does the term "bloatware" really mean? What does it really mean to maximize "interactively"? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be intuitive? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Widgets International is the industry leader of fractal Total Quality Control. Think ultra-holistic, bleeding-edge. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? What does it really mean to architect "wirelessly"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary macro-clicks-and-mortar, reality-based CAE and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "co-branded distributed Total Quality Management" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our versioning but our capability to seize. We have come to know that it is better to productize cyber-proactively than to streamline proactively. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The social networks factor is dot-com. Widgets International has permanently altered the theory of bloatware. Think cyber-ubiquitous. We will target the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "real-time, six-sigma". Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. The obfuscation monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for coping with unplanned-for power shifts? The ability to extend compellingly leads to the ability to disintermediate iteravely. If you revolutionize iteravely, you may have to transition efficiently. It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of VOIP and Java. What does it really mean to revolutionize "proactively"? We will expedite the ability of systems to seize. Widgets International practically invented the term "intra-customer-defined versioning". What does the term "reporting" really mean? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our reporting but our power to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? If you monetize efficiently, you may have to morph holistically. What does it really mean to optimize "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be B2B? Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for monitoring emerging biometrics?