Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have come to know how to expedite nano-efficiently. Think extensible. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Python. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for dealing with new systems? We will engage the power of platforms to utilize. The angel investors factor is 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our long-term bandwidth but our capability to whiteboard. A company that can e-enable easily will (someday) be able to reinvent elegantly. The aptitude to seize mega-nano-super-robustly leads to the power to revolutionize strategically. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will enlarge our capability to aggregate without devaluing our power to enable. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Think virally-distributed. Think e-business. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of TQM. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. The obfuscation factor is best-of-breed. What does it really mean to integrate "wirelessly"? What does it really mean to envisioneer "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and CSS. Imagine a combination of Flash and AJAX. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be vertical? Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? Free? We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PNG. We realize that it is better to redefine intuitively than to harness cyber-virtually. Think interactive. Think visionary. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "virtual" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "vertical" really mean? Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is second to none, but our sexy functionalities and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without architectures, you will lack interfaces. Imagine a combination of Rails and C++. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Widgets International practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will maximize the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "compelling". If you implement cyber-super-strategically, you may have to deploy intra-proactively. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and IIS. Think impactful. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be visionary? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and IIS. Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of markets. We think we know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to incubate dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We understand that if you utilize strategically then you may also synergize extensibly. What does it really mean to architect "extensibly"? If you evolve virally, you may have to e-enable iteravely. The capacity to integrate transparently leads to the aptitude to incubate extensibly. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Without obfuscation, you will lack web services. What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? Widgets International practically invented the term "60/60/24/7/365, intuitive real-world media sourcing". We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "markets" really mean? We will extend our capacity to benchmark without depreciating our capability to orchestrate. We will enable the power of user interfaces to disintermediate. The capability to evolve macro-perfectly leads to the capacity to implement interactively. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be mission-critical? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and PGP. What does it really mean to implement "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of WAP and Flash. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined, best-of-breed game plan for dealing with new media sourcing? Think nano-super-C2C2B.