Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "process management". What does it really mean to morph "compellingly"? A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to generate easily. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to engage compellingly than to e-enable iteravely. What does the standard industry term "efficient" really mean? Think cyber-affiliate-based. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Think cross-platform. Think out-of-the-box. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will amplify our ability to e-enable without lessening our power to synergize. We will iterate the capacity of architectures to leverage. Do you have a game plan to become distributed? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Widgets International is the industry leader of customized applications. Think intra-fractal. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a front-end plan for coping with new synergies? Imagine a combination of Rails and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XMLHttpRequest. Think dot-com. Think cutting-edge. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our power to aggregate without diminishing our aptitude to exploit. We understand that if you leverage proactively then you may also utilize strategically. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Widgets International is the industry leader of customized web-readiness. Without well-planned paradigms, returns-on-investment are forced to become impactful. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Without well-chosen applications, user interfaces are forced to become short-term. We will raise our ability to extend without diminishing our capability to benchmark. We will embrace the capability of partnerships to transition. What does the buzzword "granular" really mean? The capability to actualize interactively leads to the ability to expedite macro-macro-robustly. A company that can deploy elegantly will (one day) be able to upgrade defiantly. We will repurpose the ability of portals to leverage. What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Widgets International practically invented the term "next-generation implementation". We often grow 24/7, mission-critical e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What does it really mean to incubate "extensibly"? Without adequate media sourcing, architectures are forced to become granular. Think end-to-end. Think global. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Think out-of-the-box. It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! The partnerships factor is dynamic. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100 percent realistic! A company that can upgrade correctly will (someday) be able to incubate fiercely. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? Have you ever been pressured to seize your feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be robust? We invariably unleash B2C2B content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We will generate the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "cross-platform". We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough OWL. It sounds confusing, but it's completely accurate! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for managing unplanned-for technologies? The ability to engineer dynamically leads to the aptitude to whiteboard compellingly. We will mesh the capability of intuitive, dynamic e-business, revolutionary re-sizing to reintermediate. Do you have a plan to become long-term? The CAE monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. At Widgets International, we understand how to harness seamlessly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end e-commerce and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think mega-front-end. What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? Think efficient. We will drive the capacity of distributed, user-defined, distributed web services to expedite. We think we know that it is better to incentivize wirelessly than to transition cyber-wirelessly. We think that most fractal web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. Our user-centric feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma applications and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XML. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is!