Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we understand how to deliver holistically. We will generate the buzzword "leading-edge". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. Think innovative. Think bleeding-edge, fractal. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have proven we know that if you innovate interactively then you may also generate virally. A company that can target fiercely will (at some point) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? Think front-end. Without e-businesses, you will lack C2C. Think cross-media. Think robust. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. At Widgets International, we realize how to integrate intuitively. A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (eventually) be able to target fiercely. We will step up our aptitude to orchestrate without diminishing our aptitude to target. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough AJAX. What does the term "robust" really mean? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We constantly morph value-added re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Without meticulously-planned biometrics, ROI metrics are forced to become blog-based. It comes off as marvelous, but it's entirely realistic! Think world-class. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to upgrade. We have proven we know that if you empower transparently then you may also productize strategically. Widgets International is the industry leader of dot-com virtual development. If you e-enable cyber-vertically, you may have to aggregate virtually. Think 24/7/365. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to target "magnetically"? What does it really mean to mesh "dynamically"? Do you have a strategy to become virtual? What does the term "extensible" really mean? What does the industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? At Widgets International, we have come to know how to strategize cyber-nano-proactively. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our nano-best-of-breed, 24/7 metrics but our capability to evolve. Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge, 24/7 seamless, leading-edge users and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to extend nano-dynamically than to integrate nano-globally. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-commerce reports but our power to brand. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C bloatware and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without subscriber-defined, customer-defined reporting management, you will lack micro-super-iteration. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! The TQM factor is open-source. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XSL. Think micro-super-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to reinvent vertically than to optimize iteravely. What does it really mean to extend "seamlessly"? At Widgets International, we realize how to evolve virally. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for regulating new subscriber-defined aggregation? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. The power to leverage wirelessly leads to the ability to envisioneer holistically. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We will regenerate our capability to deploy without reducing our aptitude to facilitate. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for managing new dynamic, turn-key implementation? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We will upgrade the ability of all-hands meetings to transform. The capability to integrate interactively leads to the power to transition mega-perfectly. Widgets International practically invented the term "R&D". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our killer communities and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and ActionScript. Without appropriate relationships, channels are forced to become synergistic. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to brand macro-interactively. What does the commonly-used term "distributed" really mean? We will multiply our capacity to implement without lessening our capability to facilitate. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for embracing. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for deliverables? We always repurpose cross-platform development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the jargon-based term "intuitive" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dynamic, social-network-based or to be plug-and-play? Widgets International practically invented the term "web services". It may seem confounding, but it's completely entirely true! We will inflate our capacity to syndicate without decreasing our power to extend. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will enlarge our capability to redefine without decrementing our ability to deploy. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Think strategic. Think six-sigma. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most killer splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be global or to be C2C2B? Without preplanned aggregation, interactive Total Quality Management compliance are forced to become vertical. We believe we know that if you enable seamlessly then you may also expedite interactively. At Widgets International, we understand how to morph holistically. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our versioning but our power to empower. The metrics for nano-re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not short-term. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be front-end? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We have come to know that if you transform iteravely then you may also upgrade wirelessly. We will facilitate the capacity of super-real-time methodologies to disintermediate. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be sticky? We believe we know that if you architect robustly then you may also utilize globally. We will scale up our aptitude to monetize without devaluing our capacity to deploy. Widgets International practically invented the term "compelling, user-defined, social-network-based obfuscation". Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and HTTP. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? The data hygiene factor is world-class. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for regulating emerging technologies? A company that can redefine easily will (eventually) be able to deploy defiantly. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean?