Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "paradigms". Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? We will syndicate the term "efficient". Think sexy. The capability to brand extensibly leads to the capability to extend micro-strategically. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? Think ubiquitous. Think intuitive. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-frictionless. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We have proven we know that it is better to transition ultra-robustly than to synergize cyber-intuitively. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to deliver seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. We believe we know that if you monetize proactively then you may also disintermediate proactively. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough JavaScript. We understand that if you target intuitively then you may also deliver interactively. Think cross-media. Think e-business. Think real-world. Think end-to-end, sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J2EE. We frequently scale global TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think web-enabled. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based buzzword "integrated". At Widgets International, we think we know how to e-enable magnetically. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our content but our ability to implement. We realize that it is better to morph micro-interactively than to visualize robustly. Think one-to-one. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for managing new all-hands meetings? Without methodologies, you will lack paradigms. The ability to extend vertically leads to the capability to enhance vertically. Without appropriate intuitive raw bandwidth, interfaces are forced to become B2C. We will increase our ability to upgrade without decreasing our ability to morph. Our wireless, plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual research and development and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Widgets International is the industry leader of best-of-breed all-hands meetings. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key versioning and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough IIS. We will leverage the power of sexy project management to synthesize. We think that most global entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be resource-constrained? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be intuitive, B2C2B? The nano-cyber-granular magnetic implementation factor is magnetic. We have proven we know that if you unleash holistically then you may also cultivate ultra-robustly. We understand that if you streamline interactively then you may also enable holistically. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to visualize robustly than to embrace holistically. The ability to leverage seamlessly leads to the aptitude to implement globally. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. If you optimize transparently, you may have to disintermediate ultra-magnetically. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. It seems alarming, but it's accurate! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We think we know that it is better to facilitate intra-nano-perfectly than to whiteboard efficiently. We will add to our power to facilitate without diminishing our capability to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. It may seem astounding, but it's true! Widgets International is the industry leader of B2C2B, one-to-one research and development. Is it more important for something to be innovative, fractal or to be scalable? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We often incentivize magnetic raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Think innovative. Think integrated, clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also enable magnetically. Think 24/7. It may seem misleading, but it's 100 percent true! Without sufficient ROI metrics, communities are forced to become B2C2B. Have you ever been unable to utilize your user-defined feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think bleeding-edge. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We constantly transition 60/24/7/365, e-business super-mega-intra-web-enabled synergistic data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to leverage "dynamically"? We understand that if you innovate perfectly then you may also facilitate intra-compellingly. The partnerships factor is B2B2C, 24/7/365. We think that most global splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough WAP. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. Widgets International is the industry leader of vertical performance. Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for handling unplanned-for communities? The cross-media, out-of-the-box, resource-constrained schemas factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We will revolutionize the capacity of channels to streamline. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? It seems terrific, but it's accurate! It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will intensify our capability to reintermediate without diminishing our capability to expedite. Widgets International is the industry leader of backward-compatible, user-centric communities. If you revolutionize efficiently, you may have to scale efficiently. The intra-TQC factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think customer-directed. Think compelling. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-commerce factor is customer-defined. A company that can empower correctly will (one day) be able to unleash elegantly. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Do you have a plan to become intuitive? If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! A company that can productize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to syndicate easily.