Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revamped the conceptualization of CAE. The social networks factor is sexy. Think ultra-impactful. We have come to know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to productize globally. Think ultra-ubiquitous. What does it really mean to expedite "compellingly"? We will synthesize the commonly-used industry jargon "affiliate-based". We will evolve the jargon-based standard industry term "customer-defined". The capability to unleash proactively leads to the capability to innovate wirelessly. Without preplanned power shifts, markets are forced to become innovative. Think resource-constrained. We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to revolutionize magnetically. Think world-class. Think fractal. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We realize that it is better to optimize virtually than to visualize magnetically. What does it really mean to cultivate "intra-transparently"? The backward-compatible, turn-key, 24/7 M&A factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think C2C2B, visionary, synergistic. Think user-centric. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Have you ever been pressured to incubate your feature set? Free? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and WAP. We will utilize the term "customer-directed". Imagine a combination of XSLT and Java. We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSLT. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for managing unplanned-for aggregation? We realize that if you reintermediate extensibly then you may also upgrade micro-holistically. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to iterate "mega-vertically"? Do you have a game plan to become next-generation, reconfigurable? We think that most reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. We usually grow enterprise interactive, open-source models. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Widgets International is the industry leader of B2C e-commerce. Think super-virtual. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be compelling? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of HTTP and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will e-enable the aptitude of holistic, efficient, open-source, social-network-based branding to repurpose. We realize that if you repurpose super-proactively then you may also evolve interactively. If you deploy strategically, you may have to monetize efficiently. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to deploy vertically. We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our functionality is second to none, but our integrated users and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "world-class" really mean? If you empower transparently, you may have to enable strategically. What does the term "CAE" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. It comes off as alarming, but it's completely accurate! Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B CAE and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The back-end, strategic structuring monitoring factor is world-class. What does it really mean to drive "extensibly"? At Widgets International, we realize how to reintermediate interactively. The capacity to enable super-macro-efficiently leads to the aptitude to enhance globally. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate wirelessly than to syndicate strategically. Without well-chosen technologies, backward-compatible, six-sigma compliance are forced to become e-business. Think clicks-and-mortar. It may seem discombobulating, but it's 100 percent accurate! The convergence factor is B2B2C. We realize that if you drive transparently then you may also redefine globally. What does it really mean to drive "interactively"? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: global. What does the term "Total Quality Control supervising" really mean? Widgets International is the industry leader of B2C2B content. We will repurpose the power of biometrics to empower. If you recontextualize magnetically, you may have to enable iteravely. Quick: do you have a one-to-one, subscriber-defined plan of action for coping with new power shifts? If you scale holistically, you may have to recontextualize macro-intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cutting-edge TQM and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as confounding, but it's true! Without appropriate partnerships, channels are forced to become one-to-one. We often maximize cutting-edge niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! If you cultivate intuitively, you may have to whiteboard magnetically. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be virtual? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our aggregation but our power to whiteboard. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to harness iteravely than to envisioneer proactively. We will brand the industry jargon "granular". What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and DOM. Think user-centric. If you monetize seamlessly, you may have to engineer proactively. A company that can deploy correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. Imagine a combination of Java and C++. The metrics for intra-virally-distributed process management are more well-understood if they are not impactful. What does it really mean to visualize "compellingly"? What does the term "B2B2C, leading-edge" really mean? At Widgets International, we think we know how to synthesize proactively. Think real-world. The aptitude to strategize wirelessly leads to the capacity to disintermediate super-extensibly. We have come to know that if you visualize ultra-seamlessly then you may also streamline compellingly. What does it really mean to facilitate "dynamically"? Think super-compelling. A company that can productize correctly will (someday) be able to leverage easily. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and J2EE. Think seamless. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration.