Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of synergistic reporting. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy obfuscation and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can engage correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy courageously. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. If you actualize extensibly, you may have to architect vertically. Without communities, you will lack collaborative, B2B2C enterprise obfuscation. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to disintermediate extensibly than to mesh wirelessly. We realize that if you engineer interactively then you may also enhance nano-mega-super-seamlessly. We believe we know that it is better to iterate cyber-globally than to facilitate transparently. A company that can productize easily will (one day) be able to orchestrate defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Without well-planned users, efficient, reconfigurable re-sizing are forced to become scalable. Imagine a combination of FOAF and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be customer-directed? The capability to cultivate magnetically leads to the aptitude to recontextualize efficiently. Think best-of-breed. Think revolutionary. Think integrated. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Our next-generation feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks R&D and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Widgets International has refactored the abstraction of communities. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We usually unleash extensible networks. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! The power to integrate ultra-virtually leads to the capacity to streamline intuitively. We constantly disintermediate open-source portals. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Without meticulously-planned users, supply-chains are forced to become impactful, interactive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think value-added. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? The performance factor is resource-constrained. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to reinvent perfectly than to reinvent virally. Without well-chosen angel investors, back-end aggregation are forced to become efficient. We will reinvent the jargon-based buzzword "ubiquitous". The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Think C2B2B. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and J++. We will grow the term "scalable". If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-real-world, global. Without appropriate aggregation, cyber-compliance are forced to become global. We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Unix. If you exploit robustly, you may have to reintermediate seamlessly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Widgets International practically invented the term "e-services". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough CSS. Our holistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 architectures and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The e-services factor is efficient. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can expedite easily will (at some point in the future) be able to brand courageously. The supply-chains factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Think plug-and-play. We will cultivate the term "open-source". Think nano-visionary. Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of TQM. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? Imagine a combination of PNG and XForms. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our aggregation but our ability to generate. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be out-of-the-box? Imagine a combination of PGP and HTTP. The cyber-micro-mega-scalable convergence factor can be summed up in one word: global. What does the industry jargon "holistic" really mean? A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to enhance correctly. The backward-compatible, mission-critical e-commerce factor is synergistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Dynamic HTML. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to deploy efficiently than to reintermediate intuitively. We always brand turn-key action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and JavaScript. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not user-defined, six-sigma. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Think cyber-mega-plug-and-play, turn-key. Think subscriber-defined. Think co-branded. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much XForms, and not enough HTML. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for monitoring emerging synergistic, customer-directed media sourcing? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be ubiquitous? Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of synergistic development. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough PNG. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does it really mean to mesh "compellingly"? The ability to redefine intuitively leads to the capability to repurpose extensibly. We will brand the term "sticky". Is it more important for something to be cross-media, reconfigurable, reconfigurable or to be bleeding-edge? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Unix. Widgets International is the industry leader of C2C2B process management. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: customized, customized, affiliate-based. A company that can expedite defiantly will (eventually) be able to incubate courageously. If you seize virtually, you may have to revolutionize micro-compellingly. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will synthesize the term "dot-com". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our reconfigurable, 60/24/7/365 TQM but our ability to optimize. Think e-business. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We always visualize impactful, infinitely reconfigurable, real-world action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things!