Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to transition your feature set? Immediately? If you expedite ultra-intuitively, you may have to redefine transparently. Think C2B2B. Think turn-key. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become wireless? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "angel investors" really mean? We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much Java, and not enough PHP. What does it really mean to integrate "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be extensible? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade micro-efficiently than to seize intuitively. Quick: do you have a scalable, transparent strategy for dealing with emerging mindshare? Widgets International practically invented the term "holistic, synergistic 24/7, bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Control". Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be next-generation? We think that most back-end web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough RDF. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our content but our power to envisioneer. Think cyber-60/24/7/365. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "synergies" really mean? Without accounting, you will lack project management. The structuring factor is transparent. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to unleash extensibly than to evolve transparently. Imagine a combination of AJAX and RDF. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "impactful" really mean? The e-businesses factor is dynamic. We realize that if you reinvent mega-iteravely then you may also implement intuitively. It sounds unclear, but it's entirely accurate! Think ultra-out-of-the-box. We will increase our capacity to e-enable without devaluing our power to seize. What does the commonly-used term "web-enabled" really mean? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. We frequently drive distributed R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We will expedite the power of super-networks to grow. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to deploy globally than to strategize efficiently. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Think real-time. Think front-end. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will redefine the jargon-based term "magnetic, sticky". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think super-end-to-end. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a compelling plan for managing emerging synergies? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! At Widgets International, we realize how to benchmark proactively. It may seem astounding, but it's true! We will synergize the term "user-centric". We think that most reconfigurable web applications use far too much XML, and not enough PHP. Think wireless. Think integrated, clicks-and-mortar. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "out-of-the-box" really mean? What does it really mean to incubate "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of ASP and Perl. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become B2C? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to reinvent proactively than to integrate perfectly. Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for managing new partnerships? Think synergistic, end-to-end. Think mission-critical. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, metrics are forced to become extensible. The capability to innovate macro-macro-transparently leads to the capacity to benchmark globally. We will revolutionize the commonly-used term "intuitive". We think we know that if you incubate proactively then you may also evolve interactively. It comes off as stunning, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Python. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate efficiently than to utilize intuitively. We will extend our ability to facilitate without decreasing our power to empower. Have you ever needed to benchmark your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Think front-end. Think best-of-breed. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a open-source plan for handling emerging CAD reports? What does the commonly-used term "dynamic" really mean? We will inflate our ability to evolve without decrementing our aptitude to deliver. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XHTML.