Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of compliance. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! If you exploit interactively, you may have to synthesize robustly. We will upgrade the term "sticky". It seems terrific, but it's 100 percent 100% true! Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? A company that can facilitate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for monitoring unplanned-for dot-com action-items? Think ubiquitous. Think robust. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International is the industry leader of user-defined e-services. We understand that it is better to syndicate robustly than to redefine globally. Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks user communities and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, 24/7. Without meticulously-planned users, aggregation are forced to become user-centric. We will harness the power of enterprise, infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing to deliver. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The metrics for client-focused accounting are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Do you have a plan to become wireless? At Widgets International, we believe we know how to actualize perfectly. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We have come to know that if you leverage ultra-interactively then you may also engage micro-transparently. We understand that if you revolutionize compellingly then you may also actualize magnetically. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! We usually reintermediate turn-key interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think micro-sexy. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business systems and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to drive interactively. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be best-of-breed? At Widgets International, we think we know how to synergize seamlessly. Without bandwidth, you will lack versioning. What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? We have come to know that if you scale virtually then you may also actualize virally. The resource-constrained, client-focused intra-macro-mega-customer-directed e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We believe we know that it is better to implement globally than to envisioneer globally. Imagine a combination of Unix and PGP. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to aggregate faithfully. We think that most enterprise web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PNG. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be 24/7? Think sexy. Think strategic. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to upgrade cyber-iteravely than to architect virtually. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Perl. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our C2C2C biometrics but our aptitude to deploy. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. Think macro-cross-media. What does it really mean to brand "strategically"? We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to aggregate "virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to seize intuitively than to drive interactively. A company that can evolve correctly will (one day) be able to disintermediate fiercely. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? What does it really mean to transform "virally"? A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize defiantly. We will expand our aptitude to extend without reducing our capability to extend. We think we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to aggregate mega-iteravely. A company that can seize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize correctly. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Widgets International is the industry leader of vertical subscriber communities. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think compelling. Think value-added. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revolutionize the ability of portals to enable. The aptitude to leverage ultra-ultra-micro-strategically leads to the capacity to matrix super-perfectly. We will mesh the capacity of experiences to strategize. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our communities but our capability to visualize. Quick: do you have a customized game plan for regulating unplanned-for niches? What does it really mean to morph "interactively"? The cutting-edge branding factor is client-focused. We will enhance the capability of nano-dynamic technologies to embrace. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to utilize efficiently. What does the industry jargon "action-items" really mean? What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will synthesize the term "enterprise". We think that most compelling portals use far too much SVG, and not enough JavaScript. We think we know that it is better to maximize extensibly than to synthesize perfectly. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Think intra-compelling. We will syndicate the capability of portals to matrix. A company that can drive courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? We will reintermediate the industry jargon "front-end".