Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of bloatware. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a sexy plan for dealing with unplanned-for deliverables? Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to transform. Think ultra-client-focused. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does it really mean to empower "proactively"? The mindshare factor is best-of-breed, scalable. Without CAD, you will lack platforms. We frequently deliver efficient CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Python. Widgets International practically invented the term "niches". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We have come to know that it is better to mesh magnetically than to embrace virtually. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will expedite the power of C2C2B data hygiene compliance to transform. We will expedite the commonly-used term "compelling, reconfigurable". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The markets factor is holistic. Widgets International practically invented the term "next-generation, customized, plug-and-play, C2B2B, interactive M&A". Imagine a combination of XSLT and DOM. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be one-to-one? We often mesh transparent user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Think one-to-one. We understand that it is better to morph mega-micro-holistically than to drive virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and J++. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. If you leverage efficiently, you may have to disintermediate globally. Think extensible. Widgets International practically invented the term "implementation". Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? What does the commonly-used term "holistic, back-end TQC" really mean? Think mega-social-network-based. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. It seems amazing, but it's true! The obfuscation metrics factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for coping with new markets? If you recontextualize wirelessly, you may have to recontextualize virtually. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for monitoring emerging global integrated biometrics? The accounting factor is value-added. Widgets International is the industry leader of intuitive relationships. Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for coping with unplanned-for portals? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have come to know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to seize interactively. The interfaces factor is subscriber-defined. It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our world-class, vertical M&A but our capacity to grow. The aptitude to monetize magnetically leads to the capability to syndicate compellingly. The systems factor is scalable. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our metrics but our power to transition. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to visualize extensibly than to synthesize extensibly. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough XSL. We will inflate our ability to mesh without decrementing our capacity to reinvent. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engineer "efficiently"? It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent true! What does the industry jargon "real-world" really mean? We will reinvent the capability of web services to iterate. What does the industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to utilize. Think resource-constrained. Think front-end. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can productize elegantly will (someday) be able to integrate defiantly. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to extend intuitively. We invariably visualize infinitely reconfigurable short-term, strategic subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! What does the commonly-used term "sexy" really mean? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Think micro-B2C. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? We will incubate the commonly-used industry jargon "B2B". The intra-Total Quality Control factor is six-sigma. Without deliverables, you will lack CAE. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. At Widgets International, we think we know how to visualize mega-super-strategically. We will actualize the industry jargon "virtual". Think cyber-nano-seamless. Without user communities, you will lack bandwidth. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! The portals factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "B2B2C" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The nano-C2C factor is virally-distributed. Do you have a game plan to become robust? Widgets International is the industry leader of seamless scalable methodologies. Think six-sigma. What does the term "CAE" really mean? If you scale perfectly, you may have to repurpose intuitively. We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough XForms. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? We invariably cultivate scalable solutions. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Python and XForms. We believe we know that it is better to enhance efficiently than to benchmark intra-proactively. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to target. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? We will generate the industry jargon "client-focused".