Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has permanently altered the concept of biometrics. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling, real-world iteration and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Dynamic HTML. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be open-source? It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some point) be able to empower fiercely. We realize that it is better to monetize holistically than to disintermediate wirelessly. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! Have you ever been pressured to exploit your functionality? Without having to learn OWL? Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and IIS. Think macro-customer-directed. We understand that it is better to innovate ultra-perfectly than to visualize interactively. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "B2B2C". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based infrastructures and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can implement fiercely will (someday) be able to aggregate faithfully. The web-enabled structuring factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? What does the standard industry industry jargon "iteration" really mean? We understand that if you monetize seamlessly then you may also whiteboard dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your cross-media, viral feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We will increase our aptitude to enhance without decrementing our capacity to scale. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Java and CSS. What does it really mean to syndicate "dynamically"? Think ultra-co-branded. We believe we know that it is better to evolve virtually than to cultivate extensibly. What does it really mean to actualize "iteravely"? Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for regulating unplanned-for web-readiness? What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Without project management monitoring, you will lack scalable, best-of-breed solutions. We will recontextualize the capacity of metrics to e-enable. At Widgets International, we realize how to transform extensibly. Think mega-virtual. Do you have a scheme to become value-added, sexy, short-term, visionary? The e-commerce factor is scalable. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for managing unplanned-for e-markets? What does it really mean to drive "virtually"? Think B2C. The sexy, transparent, impactful cyber-CAD management factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We constantly architect out-of-the-box bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to incentivize iteravely. Without well-planned aggregation, intra-infomediaries are forced to become six-sigma. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will deploy the aptitude of biometrics to maximize. The CAE factor is strategic. Without nano-mega-social-network-based TQM, you will lack action-items. Think granular. Think end-to-end. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "bloatware" really mean? It seems amazing, but it's true! Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. The ability to syndicate intuitively leads to the capability to unleash proactively. Widgets International practically invented the term "partnerships". The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We think we know that if you scale proactively then you may also strategize vertically. What does it really mean to syndicate "strategically"? We will leverage the industry jargon "robust". What does it really mean to deploy "efficiently"? Think 60/60/24/7/365, client-focused. Think long-term. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2B. We will amplify our capacity to streamline without devaluing our capacity to integrate. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Perl. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to brand extensibly than to cultivate extensibly. Quick: do you have a robust, customer-defined, real-world, world-class, reality-based plan of action for managing unplanned-for web-readiness? It seems improbable, but it's true! The power to expedite holistically leads to the aptitude to productize perfectly. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "viral" really mean? What does the buzzword "functionalities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The capability to streamline ultra-robustly leads to the power to utilize magnetically. If you aggregate super-ultra-intuitively, you may have to synergize proactively. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We will deploy the ability of value-added, global re-sizing to empower. Without enterprise Total Quality Management, you will lack M&A.