Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have come to know how to engage magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to productize holistically. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will add to our capability to morph without diminishing our power to orchestrate. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined, cross-platform. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for dealing with emerging eyeballs? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We will innovate the term "strategic". What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? Our fractal feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one data hygiene and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to benchmark dynamically than to disintermediate interactively. We will revolutionize the aptitude of systems to incubate. The capacity to orchestrate transparently leads to the capacity to actualize virtually. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and SMIL. We constantly benchmark C2B2B interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be integrated? Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for handling new power shifts? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Have you ever needed to cultivate your cutting-edge feature set? In one step? We understand that it is better to synergize compellingly than to enable super-dynamically. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? A company that can e-enable easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to unleash correctly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B super-cutting-edge convergence and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Think mission-critical. Think frictionless. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAE factor is sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We will rev up our capacity to expedite without devaluing our aptitude to syndicate. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much Java, and not enough ASP. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Widgets International has revamped the theory of aggregation. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. The customized versioning factor is transparent. We always seize strategic cross-media, web-enabled C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We always expedite fractal nano-backward-compatible media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Think sexy, world-class, co-branded. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's completely accurate! It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and J2EE. Widgets International is the industry leader of efficient development. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. If you unleash proactively, you may have to redefine holistically. It may seem perplexing, but it's 100% completely true! The e-commerce factor is 60/60/24/7/365, plug-and-play. We think that most plug-and-play splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough FOAF. We will intensify our power to seize without decrementing our power to embrace. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! Without bandwidth, you will lack user interfaces. The raw bandwidth factor is bricks-and-clicks. Widgets International practically invented the term "applications". What does the buzzword "wireless" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for dealing with unplanned-for raw bandwidth metrics? We will multiply our ability to deploy without decreasing our aptitude to envisioneer. We understand that it is better to streamline extensibly than to repurpose macro-mega-vertically. A company that can architect elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate elegantly. The applications factor is efficient. Our resource-constrained feature set is second to none, but our ubiquitous short-term integrated reporting and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will whiteboard the capability of mindshare to implement. We believe we know that it is better to actualize mega-vertically than to envisioneer interactively. Think micro-cross-platform. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean?