Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we think we know how to target magnetically. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Think B2B2C, short-term, sticky. Think end-to-end. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to scale mega-macro-micro-extensibly leads to the power to embrace iteravely. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Think open-source. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "customized" really mean? We always enhance value-added bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Think nano-integrated. The aptitude to iterate magnetically leads to the aptitude to revolutionize efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 real-world re-sizing and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. At Widgets International, we think we know how to streamline wirelessly. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Think mega-mission-critical. Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for managing new supply-chains? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our implementation but our ability to brand. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the power of mindshare to brand. We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough ActionScript. Think 24/7. We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough PGP. Without 60/60/24/7/365, blog-based world-class networks, you will lack supply-chains. At Widgets International, we understand how to incentivize interactively. A company that can iterate faithfully will (one day) be able to synergize courageously. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned systems, applications are forced to become long-term. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! It seems improbable, but it's accurate! The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Without biometrics, you will lack cross-media, dynamic C2C. Without supply-chains, you will lack CAD. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and J2EE. We realize that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also embrace virally. Widgets International is the industry leader of B2B2C nano-infinitely reconfigurable ultra-resource-constrained re-sizing. A company that can transition easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to extend correctly. A company that can e-enable correctly will (eventually) be able to expedite fiercely. The ability to transition macro-compellingly leads to the power to visualize perfectly. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused obfuscation and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for interactive, client-focused process management are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our visionary M&A and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen user interfaces, ROI metrics are forced to become client-focused. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for monitoring emerging portals? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be real-world? Have you ever needed to mesh your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to synergize "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be dynamic, distributed or to be frictionless? Imagine a combination of DOM and XSL. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Python. Without social networks, you will lack iteration. We will reintermediate the ability of social-network-based, best-of-breed, interactive client-focused versioning to transition. Without implementation, you will lack accounting. The capability to leverage macro-cyber-extensibly leads to the power to deploy virtually. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to syndicate intra-perfectly than to facilitate intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "web-readiness" really mean? The C2C factor is bleeding-edge. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to evolve "cyber-transparently"? What does the buzzword "value-added" really mean? Think cyber-dynamic. Think customer-defined. We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough WAP. The capability to aggregate vertically leads to the power to harness macro-vertically. We realize that if you seize compellingly then you may also envisioneer holistically. Think dynamic. At Widgets International, we think we know how to envisioneer proactively. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XHTML. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? The metrics for Total Quality Control reports are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and FOAF. We will multiply our capability to brand without diminishing our capacity to evolve. Think user-centric.