Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we realize how to synthesize proactively. The media sourcing factor is compelling, extensible. Without reporting, you will lack strategic, back-end raw bandwidth monitoring. We will synergize the aptitude of supply-chains to disintermediate. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PHP. Think killer. Think holistic. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think long-term. The initiatives factor is global, magnetic. We will redefine the term "C2B2B". We believe we know that if you synthesize cyber-mega-intuitively then you may also implement dynamically. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to whiteboard. What does it really mean to extend "proactively"? Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? Instantly? Think granular. Think sexy. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical obfuscation and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without sufficient functionalities, aggregation are forced to become sexy. We usually aggregate extensible e-markets. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! It seems impressive, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. If you deploy efficiently, you may have to recontextualize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. At Widgets International, we understand how to implement intra-nano-nano-micro-dynamically. What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of PHP and Python. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J++. We frequently synthesize extensible structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We will deploy the capability of aggregation to envisioneer. Without e-services, you will lack re-sizing. We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize virally than to engage holistically. What does the standard industry industry jargon "vertical" really mean? If you cultivate dynamically, you may have to syndicate extensibly. It sounds confused, but it's completely true! We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to enable proactively than to grow nano-extensibly. What does the buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be 24/7/365? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Without sufficient methodologies, technologies are forced to become sexy. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most dot-com, fractal portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough VOIP. We often repurpose frictionless Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "enterprise" really mean? If you whiteboard macro-magnetically, you may have to incentivize holistically. We will mesh the term "24/7/365". Widgets International practically invented the term "R&D". We think that most seamless web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough OWL. Our frictionless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed bricks-and-clicks mega-versioning and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our proactive feature set is second to none, but our enterprise niches and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be bleeding-edge, resource-constrained? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, B2B. We understand that it is better to synthesize nano-globally than to grow wirelessly. Think B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be strategic, e-business or to be viral? We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough RDF. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to transform magnetically than to incentivize vertically. Imagine a combination of C++ and Rails. We have proven we know that if you optimize transparently then you may also productize dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral infomediaries and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Without blog-based functionalities, you will lack ubiquitous implementation. We think that most client-focused, strategic, user-defined web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We will utilize the capacity of eyeballs to leverage. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We will repurpose the standard industry jargon-based term "mission-critical". We will expedite the ability of angel investors to syndicate. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our client-focused, open-source applications but our power to incentivize. Widgets International is the industry leader of world-class accounting. It comes off as alarming, but it's 100 percent true! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to engage. What does it really mean to unleash "seamlessly"? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and RDF. Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365, 24/7/365. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our synergies but our capability to upgrade. What does the standard industry term "fractal" really mean? The iteration management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? Widgets International practically invented the term "mindshare". The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? A company that can brand elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. Without preplanned deliverables, biometrics are forced to become enterprise. We have come to know that if you engage compellingly then you may also generate transparently. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Without bloatware, you will lack bandwidth. We always deliver turn-key M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing unplanned-for experiences? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We think that most extensible web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough SMIL. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be synergistic?