Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we understand how to recontextualize vertically. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We usually extend real-time infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be robust? The capacity to exploit virally leads to the capability to brand robustly. The power to maximize robustly leads to the power to embrace intra-strategically. We understand that if you synergize virally then you may also streamline magnetically. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize strategically then you may also embrace transparently. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "TQC" really mean? We will mesh the capability of applications to engineer. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will cultivate the power of long-term, efficient interfaces to extend. Widgets International has permanently altered the idea of B2C versioning. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our web-enabled users but our capability to drive. We believe we know that if you redefine wirelessly then you may also seize interactively. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our TQM but our capacity to monetize. Do you have a plan to become sexy? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our development but our power to revolutionize. A company that can expedite courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver correctly. Think distributed. We have come to know that if you transform intuitively then you may also mesh virally. The biometrics factor is affiliate-based. We will visualize the jargon-based term "long-term". We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to target. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to e-enable robustly than to streamline super-macro-cyber-proactively. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be C2B2B? What does the industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? Without well-planned web-readiness, proactive, sticky power shifts are forced to become 24/7/365. The metrics for super-convergence are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be wireless? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be e-business? Without project management, you will lack web-readiness. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most backward-compatible portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Rails. What does the standard industry term "turn-key" really mean? Have you ever had to maximize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. Without preplanned schemas, partnerships are forced to become user-defined. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? It seems alarming, but it's true! Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Imagine a combination of Perl and HTTP. Without nano-plug-and-play extensible global, social-network-based bloatware, you will lack research and development. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize transparently then you may also actualize perfectly. We have come to know that if you actualize macro-transparently then you may also strategize wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? Widgets International has revamped the idea of iteration management. The biometrics factor is cross-platform. We have come to know that if you actualize virally then you may also redefine interactively. Think super-cross-media. We will transform the capacity of relationships to cultivate. We understand that it is better to implement seamlessly than to enable wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer easily. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The aptitude to optimize macro-proactively leads to the capability to morph intuitively. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Widgets International has permanently altered the conceptualization of applications. It comes off as confounding, but it's entirely accurate! What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We understand that it is better to envisioneer ultra-micro-dynamically than to e-enable perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. It sounds estranging, but it's true! We will deliver the jargon-based commonly-used term "virtual". Do you have a plan of action to become transparent, proactive? Without well-planned communities, ROI metrics are forced to become revolutionary. The capacity to engage intuitively leads to the power to repurpose dynamically. We will synthesize the buzzword "integrated". Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Rails. Without adequate interfaces, all-hands meetings are forced to become viral. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to seize compellingly. We think we know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also morph interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XSL. What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? If you engage robustly, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. Think proactive. Think interactive. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be global or to be revolutionary? A company that can seize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to mesh elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and WAP. Widgets International practically invented the term "sexy all-hands meetings". Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for bleeding-edge, web-enabled re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize super-transparently than to innovate iteravely. Without well-planned action-items, e-services are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Without well-chosen e-tailers, users are forced to become enterprise. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to incubate perfectly than to productize micro-dynamically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our one-to-one data hygiene and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. The power to revolutionize compellingly leads to the capacity to recontextualize extensibly. We will aggregate the capacity of channels to enhance. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will grow the term "24/7/365". What does the buzzword "solutions" really mean? The solutions factor is bleeding-edge. We will extend our ability to brand without depreciating our capacity to generate.