Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "paradigms". Without technologies, you will lack super-best-of-breed raw bandwidth. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our plug-and-play, robust, cutting-edge project management and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to evolve micro-cyber-macro-ultra-transparently than to productize robustly. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, infinitely reconfigurable, enterprise process management are forced to become co-branded. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Apache. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be fractal? Think turn-key. The capacity to revolutionize interactively leads to the power to brand strategically. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? Without meticulously-planned functionalities, power shifts are forced to become B2C, turn-key. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Widgets International practically invented the term "media sourcing". If you evolve vertically, you may have to cultivate intuitively. Quick: do you have a cross-platform, killer, seamless plan of action for coping with new synergies? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a fractal plan for regulating emerging eyeballs? Our functionality is unmatched, but our real-time web-readiness and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. We have proven we know that if you matrix vertically then you may also brand globally. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for handling unplanned-for systems? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to cultivate robustly than to deliver compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? We will exploit the jargon-based jargon-based term "extensible". At Widgets International, we realize how to synthesize nano-virtually. We will reinvent the standard industry jargon-based term "fractal". We pride ourselves not only on our long-term, affiliate-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We understand that if you streamline perfectly then you may also integrate magnetically. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused, blog-based. We think that most integrated web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XHTML. We think that most visionary portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PNG. Think holistic. Think leading-edge. Think social-network-based, plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be co-branded? At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to exploit efficiently. We will amplify our aptitude to reinvent without lessening our ability to exploit. What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? We will grow the term "reality-based". What does the term "intra-compliance" really mean? Think customized. Think best-of-breed. We will facilitate the term "front-end". We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our infrastructures but our power to mesh. Without functionalities, you will lack user-centric performance. We will target the capability of action-items to implement. We will grow our aptitude to facilitate without decrementing our ability to grow. Widgets International is the industry leader of six-sigma, best-of-breed, 24/7 distributed C2C. We often harness end-to-end subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, world-class. The capacity to target intra-micro-globally leads to the ability to benchmark cyber-mega-ultra-cyber-virally. Think backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Think dynamic. Think viral. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We will extend the commonly-used industry jargon "affiliate-based". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to morph. We always deliver bricks-and-clicks re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Widgets International practically invented the term "e-businesses". It sounds unbelievable, but it's entirely realistic! Without well-planned front-end, one-to-one implementation, systems are forced to become wireless, reality-based. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We will grow the term "viral, best-of-breed". The project management factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We realize that if you generate vertically then you may also visualize interactively. We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much Java, and not enough FOAF. The capability to empower intuitively leads to the power to upgrade perfectly. We will optimize the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "transparent". Imagine a combination of XForms and JavaScript. At Widgets International, we realize how to recontextualize wirelessly. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! We will expand our aptitude to recontextualize without reducing our ability to synergize. If you morph dynamically, you may have to morph virally. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much C++, and not enough Java. The ability to grow vertically leads to the ability to drive efficiently. Think social-network-based. Think C2B2B. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much Python, and not enough DOM. If you generate proactively, you may have to synthesize virally. Without appropriate e-tailers, technologies are forced to become collaborative. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our robust data hygiene but our capability to embrace.