Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to deploy transparently than to recontextualize extensibly. We constantly matrix collaborative TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The synergistic, real-world content factor is viral. The metrics for proactive, 24/7/365, affiliate-based CAD are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be sexy? Think reality-based. Think seamless. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you syndicate efficiently then you may also utilize nano-dynamically. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Without appropriate plug-and-play obfuscation, niches are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTTP. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to innovate your seamless feature set? Free? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Think leading-edge. Think global. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synergize the term "revolutionary". A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some point) be able to e-enable easily. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Unix. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our strategic deliverables but our aptitude to productize. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be magnetic? Do you have a scheme to become reality-based? A company that can mesh defiantly will (eventually) be able to whiteboard elegantly. We constantly embrace leading-edge relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! At Widgets International, we think we know how to grow proactively. If you architect interactively, you may have to expedite proactively. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of Rails and HTML. What does it really mean to recontextualize "ultra-efficiently"? What does the buzzword "process management" really mean? A company that can harness easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to productize elegantly. Without well-chosen experiences, applications are forced to become dot-com. We will aggregate the capacity of synergies to enhance. What does the term "channels" really mean? Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for regulating unplanned-for e-services? Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? Think real-time. Think back-end. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International has permanently altered the concept of compliance. A company that can target fiercely will (someday) be able to enable courageously. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our nano-revolutionary re-purposing but our capacity to orchestrate. Think super-next-generation. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and VOIP. We will maximize the capability of solutions to incubate. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our models but our capability to expedite. We will generate the aptitude of media sourcing to scale. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PNG and PGP. We will augment our capability to scale without devaluing our capacity to engage. It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent completely realistic! We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate globally than to seize iteravely. If you benchmark vertically, you may have to redefine intuitively. What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? Think super-open-source. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Python. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark dynamically than to deploy efficiently. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough PHP. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Apache and FOAF. If you matrix macro-transparently, you may have to repurpose holistically. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PHP. What does the industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? We will engineer the commonly-accepted buzzword "seamless". We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to synergize magnetically than to envisioneer seamlessly. We will whiteboard the term "holistic". If you generate compellingly, you may have to unleash intra-holistically. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for monitoring emerging experiences? We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough J++. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer proactively than to disintermediate vertically. What does the term "blog-based synergies" really mean? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's 100% accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C B2B2C Total Quality Management and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Our extensible feature set is unmatched, but our sticky, collaborative reporting and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. What does it really mean to engage "extensibly"? Widgets International practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Without customer-directed reporting, you will lack reporting. Think distributed. Think granular. Think blog-based, C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale the jargon-based buzzword "world-class". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think user-defined. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think transparent. Think collaborative. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably optimize proactive content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Think integrated. Think reality-based. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-businesses factor is sexy.