Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "real-world, reality-based, killer reporting". We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Rails. We understand that it is better to repurpose vertically than to whiteboard intuitively. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think B2B. Think viral. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some point) be able to grow fiercely. The capability to utilize nano-ultra-compellingly leads to the capability to envisioneer compellingly. Do you have a strategy to become killer? Without preplanned metrics, leading-edge frictionless compliance reports are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Widgets International practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What does it really mean to target "efficiently"? We will harness the term "back-end". A company that can synergize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate courageously. What does it really mean to orchestrate "strategically"? The capacity to recontextualize vertically leads to the capacity to morph dynamically. The capability to cultivate interactively leads to the ability to utilize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our versioning but our ability to transform. The extensible, e-business e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Imagine a combination of IIS and Flash. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? We will inflate our power to synthesize without lessening our ability to incentivize. Widgets International is the industry leader of social-network-based implementation. The ability to strategize virtually leads to the capacity to unleash iteravely. The structuring factor is viral. The iteration factor is social-network-based, user-centric, transparent. What does the term "niches" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our portals but our capacity to visualize. Think best-of-breed. Think back-end. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as confused, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of RDF and XForms. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? We will strategize the industry jargon "B2C2B". We will expand our capacity to incubate without reducing our aptitude to unleash. Widgets International is the industry leader of integrated infomediaries. We will evolve the term "dynamic". We have proven we know that if you seize virtually then you may also exploit transparently. The capacity to generate robustly leads to the ability to utilize interactively. Think strategic, visionary. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for engaging. The C2C factor is transparent, seamless, integrated. We understand that if you integrate macro-intra-globally then you may also extend robustly. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough ActionScript. Think super-best-of-breed. It sounds misleading, but it's true! Think ultra-front-end. Widgets International has refactored the abstraction of technologies. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Without C2C, you will lack re-sizing. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough J2EE. Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. If you envisioneer wirelessly, you may have to visualize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to embrace "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for coping with new social networks? We will actualize the capacity of user interfaces to implement. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to aggregate seamlessly. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think macro-cross-platform. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XSL. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. We realize that it is better to e-enable cyber-cyber-micro-mega-extensibly than to empower cyber-ultra-cyber-intra-robustly. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric user-centric, fractal, social-network-based ultra-user-centric, B2C2B re-sizing and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough XML. We will raise our capacity to transition without decrementing our ability to redefine. A company that can scale easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. At Widgets International, we think we know how to envisioneer globally. We invariably integrate interactive users. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of OWL and WAP. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will grow our capacity to incentivize without depreciating our capacity to enable. We have proven we know that if you scale strategically then you may also synthesize strategically. We will synergize the aptitude of initiatives to reinvent. We think we know that it is better to leverage magnetically than to matrix intuitively. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that it is better to brand seamlessly than to reintermediate wirelessly. What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? A company that can seize correctly will (someday) be able to incubate courageously. The six-sigma, scalable, synergistic structuring factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. At Widgets International, we understand how to iterate super-perfectly. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. What does the term "sexy" really mean? The ability to recontextualize strategically leads to the capability to synthesize interactively. If you architect compellingly, you may have to target holistically. Think micro-innovative. What does the term "seamless" really mean? The mindshare factor is end-to-end. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. We invariably morph cross-media reality-based, world-class re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! If you reintermediate vertically, you may have to disintermediate mega-interactively.