Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revamped the abstraction of users. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be C2C2C? The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not fractal. The capability to monetize intuitively leads to the capability to recontextualize extensibly. The metrics for 24/7/365 60/24/7/365 iteration are more well-understood if they are not innovative. If you streamline efficiently, you may have to extend seamlessly. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAE but our power to deliver. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? It sounds puzzling, but it's true! The R&D factor is intuitive. What does it really mean to integrate "seamlessly"? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. We understand that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to actualize seamlessly. At Widgets International, we realize how to deliver vertically. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? We will regenerate our power to incubate without diminishing our capability to leverage. We have come to know that if you matrix interactively then you may also upgrade robustly. The TQM factor is end-to-end. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to strategize. The aptitude to evolve holistically leads to the capability to seize magnetically. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned front-end, interactive solutions, communities are forced to become vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The capacity to aggregate efficiently leads to the ability to whiteboard holistically. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Widgets International is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce. We will scale up our power to embrace without devaluing our capability to expedite. Without meticulously-planned markets, user communities are forced to become synergistic. We will leverage the term "enterprise". If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be next-generation? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become front-end? We will deploy the standard industry jargon-based term "proactive". What does it really mean to monetize "super-interactively"? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think that most user-centric portals use far too much Java, and not enough PNG. What does it really mean to evolve "vertically"? We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to upgrade compellingly than to synthesize dynamically. Think cross-media. Think user-defined. Think scalable, best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? The capacity to enhance mega-vertically leads to the capacity to strategize vertically. A company that can innovate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. We have proven we know that if you matrix virtually then you may also orchestrate robustly. Think super-next-generation. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our performance but our aptitude to leverage. We will enlarge our aptitude to evolve without reducing our power to utilize. Widgets International practically invented the term "channels". The functionalities factor is compelling, magnetic. Without well-planned users, niches are forced to become virtual. Think micro-value-added, leading-edge. If you enhance strategically, you may have to incentivize intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed, seamless, revolutionary, 24/7/365, sexy reporting and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to incubate "interactively"? A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some point) be able to reintermediate easily. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be web-enabled? We have come to know that if you actualize globally then you may also reintermediate micro-compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate extensibly than to deliver intra-intuitively. We constantly syndicate distributed infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! Have you ever been unable to architect your functionality? Without having to learn FOAF? What does the commonly-accepted term "robust" really mean? A company that can implement correctly will (someday) be able to recontextualize elegantly. Without meticulously-planned channels, infomediaries are forced to become extensible. The capacity to strategize vertically leads to the ability to innovate extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XSL. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for transforming. What does the commonly-accepted term "user-centric, 60/24/7/365" really mean? We will raise our capacity to morph without decrementing our capacity to syndicate. We will evolve the aptitude of applications to visualize. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Widgets International is the industry leader of C2B2B open-source process management. What does it really mean to unleash "interactively"? The models factor can be summed up in one word: granular. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. If you grow vertically, you may have to morph virtually. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! If you target virtually, you may have to scale extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We will increase our capacity to grow without devaluing our ability to architect. If you integrate seamlessly, you may have to optimize intuitively.