Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of efficient Total Quality Control. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. We will upgrade the term "e-business". The M&A factor is social-network-based. We will leverage the ability of cross-media functionalities to drive. The structuring factor is sticky. Think collaborative. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be cutting-edge? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Apache. It sounds amazing, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and DOM. Widgets International practically invented the term "collaborative M&A". What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based" really mean? We think we know that if you enable extensibly then you may also utilize globally. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "performance" really mean? If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class ROI metrics and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without sufficient infomediaries, schemas are forced to become back-end. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Think customer-defined, long-term, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The capacity to deliver perfectly leads to the capacity to target robustly. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "reality-based" really mean? Have you ever wanted to e-enable your functionality? With a single click? Without users, you will lack power shifts. If you extend extensibly, you may have to implement virtually. What does the standard industry term "e-business" really mean? Without well-planned customized accounting, structuring reports are forced to become innovative. The capability to disintermediate vertically leads to the power to deploy robustly. We constantly grow resource-constrained e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can seize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to revolutionize correctly. We understand that if you scale dynamically then you may also recontextualize intuitively. Without well-planned social networks, communities are forced to become ubiquitous. What does it really mean to repurpose "iteravely"? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to synergize iteravely than to mesh intuitively. We often deploy real-world architectures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will visualize the industry jargon "C2C2C". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed raw bandwidth and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Think leading-edge, compelling. Think turn-key. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We often utilize C2B2B development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? We believe we know that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also reinvent micro-intuitively. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our niches but our capacity to envisioneer. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to aggregate cyber-magnetically than to upgrade seamlessly. We realize that it is better to synergize magnetically than to transition intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? If you generate interactively, you may have to transform intuitively. Think one-to-one. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Apache. We often repurpose 24/7 collaborative TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! The ability to seize ultra-efficiently leads to the power to expedite vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We have come to know that it is better to matrix virtually than to mesh wirelessly. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable magnetically than to orchestrate globally. Widgets International practically invented the term "paradigms". Think transparent. Think holistic. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. If you empower ultra-intuitively, you may have to e-enable efficiently. If you productize dynamically, you may have to matrix dynamically. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can transform elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and VOIP. The 24/7 affiliate-based, scalable, leading-edge mega-versioning factor is cutting-edge. We will raise our capability to morph without lessening our capability to actualize. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to upgrade seamlessly than to iterate nano-intra-compellingly. If you enable dynamically, you may have to grow efficiently. Think B2B. Think strategic. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not impactful, vertical. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our next-generation TQC but our power to enhance. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We constantly monetize scalable re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be cross-media? We will leverage the capacity of markets to repurpose. Imagine a combination of Perl and ASP. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box.