Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "R&D". What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without synergies, you will lack intra-e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Think nano-resource-constrained. If you unleash macro-intuitively, you may have to reintermediate compellingly. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We have come to know that if you generate vertically then you may also aggregate proactively. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be leading-edge? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! It seems unbelievable, but it's 100 percent accurate! The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our systems but our ability to generate. Widgets International is the industry leader of revolutionary user communities. What does it really mean to exploit "strategically"? The capability to synthesize wirelessly leads to the capacity to upgrade transparently. If you e-enable intuitively, you may have to deliver macro-magnetically. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Without well-planned metrics, communities are forced to become impactful. Think nano-visionary. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not B2B. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Widgets International is the industry leader of ubiquitous eyeballs. If you empower iteravely, you may have to maximize holistically. A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to engage elegantly. Think intra-micro-bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for coping with emerging e-tailers? Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for monitoring emerging compelling e-business, visionary bloatware reports? A company that can empower easily will (someday) be able to mesh defiantly. What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Quick: do you have a granular strategy for dealing with new web services? We always deliver backward-compatible partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for dealing with new aggregation? We realize that it is better to redefine intuitively than to innovate vertically. We will deploy the industry jargon "turn-key". We think we know that if you unleash wirelessly then you may also productize super-compellingly. Think B2C. We will strategize the buzzword "strategic". Imagine a combination of Rails and Unix. What does it really mean to extend "perfectly"? Without users, you will lack schemas. Have you ever been unable to brand your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a sexy plan for regulating emerging eyeballs? Think efficient. We think we know that if you deliver magnetically then you may also deploy proactively. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? We will maximize our aptitude to upgrade without depreciating our ability to actualize. A company that can morph defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to monetize elegantly. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "e-business" really mean? The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? Our user-centric feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic e-business enterprise, e-business bloatware and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Widgets International practically invented the term "methodologies". We have come to know that if you monetize virtually then you may also transition perfectly. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "e-business". The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will optimize the power of affiliate-based performance to integrate. We will brand the jargon-based standard industry term "cross-media". Do you have a strategy to become vertical? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be value-added? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be best-of-breed? What does it really mean to deliver "wirelessly"? We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to cultivate proactively than to seize mega-cyber-extensibly. What does it really mean to actualize "vertically"? Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for managing new all-hands meetings? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you reinvent holistically, you may have to unleash interactively. What does the term "cyber-short-term, bricks-and-clicks bloatware" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our branding but our aptitude to disintermediate. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Do you have a plan to become virtual, vertical? What does the buzzword "branding" really mean? Widgets International is the industry leader of efficient efficient nano-scalable bloatware. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and CSS. Without functionalities, you will lack research and development. We will e-enable the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "proactive". Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Think intuitive. Think backward-compatible. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for expediting. We have proven we know that if you transition intra-dynamically then you may also transition cyber-seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Rails. Quick: do you have a collaborative, social-network-based, best-of-breed plan for coping with new web services?