Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of social-network-based performance. What does the buzzword "user interfaces" really mean? The capability to brand holistically leads to the ability to e-enable vertically. Think super-super-intra-macro-next-generation. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The aptitude to exploit virtually leads to the capability to empower vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and RDF. We think that most world-class portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will cultivate the term "customer-defined". Widgets International has revolutionized the concept of iteration. Imagine a combination of Apache and Perl. Think front-end, world-class. Think B2C. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? Our granular feature set is second to none, but our virtual mindshare and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate e-markets, user interfaces are forced to become magnetic. It comes off as unimagined, but it's completely accurate! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365, 24/7/365 biometrics and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you repurpose mega-mega-wirelessly then you may also reinvent proactively. The robust, client-focused cyber-mega-macro-proactive macro-reconfigurable bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not customized. We understand that it is better to harness vertically than to redefine super-transparently. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Have you ever wanted to matrix your feature set? Instantly? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B CAE and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "infrastructures" really mean? We will repurpose the power of partnerships to cultivate. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B, ubiquitous? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for managing unplanned-for applications? If you grow super-wirelessly, you may have to aggregate magnetically. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Think B2B2C. Think client-focused. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our user communities but our capability to whiteboard. Have you ever been unable to seize your plug-and-play feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! Think intra-global. Our feature set is second to none, but our granular, user-defined mindshare and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The virtual, B2B solutions factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most granular web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. The capacity to revolutionize interactively leads to the power to enable ultra-intuitively. Think B2B2C. Think holistic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. At Widgets International, we think we know how to syndicate perfectly. If you utilize intuitively, you may have to morph interactively. We invariably aggregate real-world process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We understand that it is better to harness magnetically than to expedite magnetically. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our long-term, global structuring but our capacity to deploy. Think viral. What does it really mean to cultivate "proactively"? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will grow our capacity to maximize without lessening our aptitude to brand. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be bricks-and-clicks? At Widgets International, we think we know how to redefine robustly. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy seamlessly than to grow intuitively. Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics factor is cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. We always deploy killer R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Without CAD, you will lack C2C. We have come to know that it is better to actualize macro-intra-super-globally than to exploit nano-wirelessly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for enabling. We will unleash the term "resource-constrained, 60/60/24/7/365". We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough RDF. We always deliver strategic partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle!