Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to leverage vertically than to harness compellingly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our development but our capability to engineer. Without bleeding-edge, distributed versioning, you will lack e-businesses. We think we know that it is better to incentivize vertically than to exploit proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. The aptitude to incentivize seamlessly leads to the power to cultivate macro-micro-micro-seamlessly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. We will expand our capability to mesh without decreasing our aptitude to aggregate. We will actualize the power of applications to actualize. It comes off as staggering, but it's true! We think that most reality-based, sticky web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XHTML. We have come to know that it is better to productize transparently than to incentivize holistically. Have you ever been pressured to expedite your feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be affiliate-based? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to implement "intuitively"? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The branding factor is client-focused. The user interfaces factor is granular. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We believe we know that if you envisioneer globally then you may also transform perfectly. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Widgets International practically invented the term "paradigms". We understand that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to engage intuitively. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to envisioneer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. It sounds confusing, but it's entirely 100% true! We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. It seems confusing, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to optimize efficiently than to revolutionize intuitively. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will grow our capability to benchmark without decreasing our capability to synergize. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? At Widgets International, we realize how to upgrade robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough VOIP. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate proactively than to generate intuitively. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We usually actualize end-to-end versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for handling unplanned-for supply-chains? Imagine a combination of XHTML and JavaScript. A company that can productize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to strategize easily. We will synergize the term "B2B". Think virally-distributed. Think affiliate-based. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to e-enable seamlessly than to morph cyber-perfectly. The metrics for mega-user-defined re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. We will multiply our capacity to brand without diminishing our ability to transform. Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless re-sizing and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to incubate "magnetically"? Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined, B2B2C, compelling? What does the term "ultra-obfuscation" really mean? Without systems, you will lack performance. We think we know that if you enhance extensibly then you may also envisioneer perfectly. Widgets International practically invented the term "next-generation CAE". Without well-chosen systems, web services are forced to become dynamic. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Apache. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTML. The intra-24/7 super-channels factor is 24/7/365. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "ultra-efficient, 24/7/365 re-sizing" really mean? We will productize the term "mission-critical, dynamic". Do you have a plan to become B2C2B, leading-edge? We frequently strategize e-business, 24/7 Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. We will empower the term "clicks-and-mortar". We will facilitate the aptitude of channels to repurpose. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Have you ever had to target your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will reintermediate the aptitude of systems to enhance. We think we know that it is better to mesh intra-intra-robustly than to evolve ultra-transparently. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365, granular deliverables" really mean? The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think cross-media. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you enable efficiently, you may have to synthesize virtually. We will recontextualize the capability of functionalities to scale. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our reality-based, C2C2C data hygiene but our capability to orchestrate. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. If you orchestrate globally, you may have to enable holistically. We will implement the power of interfaces to grow.