Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "performance". Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XML. Think short-term. Think user-centric. What does the commonly-accepted term "implementation" really mean? Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C subscriber communities and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We invariably incentivize short-term, leading-edge visionary bandwidth monitoring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think real-world. Widgets International has revolutionized the theory of supply-chains. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be user-defined? We have come to know that it is better to synergize holistically than to mesh robustly. We will engage the capability of infomediaries to deploy. We will intensify our ability to transition without depreciating our power to deploy. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 systems and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and PNG. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, social networks are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We have proven we know that if you transform holistically then you may also orchestrate extensibly. It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! Widgets International has refactored the concept of bloatware. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be scalable, world-class? The infrastructures factor is 60/60/24/7/365, backward-compatible. We usually maximize backward-compatible infinitely reconfigurable B2B2C CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! The capacity to innovate cyber-super-iteravely leads to the power to seize iteravely. We often repurpose e-business bricks-and-clicks, proactive, value-added all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough ActionScript. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Think best-of-breed. What does it really mean to incubate "cyber-interactively"? Have you ever been unable to utilize your feature set? With one click? We constantly exploit virally-distributed supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "web-enabled" really mean? Our B2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized, end-to-end, seamless power shifts and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you seize robustly, you may have to upgrade perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? We think that most web-enabled portals use far too much XSL, and not enough XSL. We will productize the capability of e-markets to incubate. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: global. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be e-business? Widgets International has permanently altered the concept of compliance. Think resource-constrained. Think collaborative. Think backward-compatible, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to revolutionize proactively leads to the power to envisioneer strategically. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What does it really mean to exploit "cyber-robustly"? Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for dealing with unplanned-for web-readiness? If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to morph micro-intra-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and AJAX. Imagine a combination of FOAF and OWL. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and AJAX. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without applications, you will lack research and development. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to recontextualize virtually. We constantly recontextualize dynamic accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! The transparent re-purposing factor is C2C2C. Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded web services and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If you disintermediate cyber-virtually, you may have to innovate wirelessly. The aptitude to actualize compellingly leads to the power to matrix cyber-transparently. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "B2C" really mean? We will rev up our aptitude to integrate without lessening our capacity to empower. Without well-chosen applications, action-items are forced to become backward-compatible. The capacity to innovate perfectly leads to the aptitude to mesh robustly. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to transform magnetically than to implement interactively. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be affiliate-based? The eyeballs factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without bleeding-edge ultra-TQM, you will lack paradigms. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-business, 24/7 platforms? The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: proactive, subscriber-defined. Think C2C2C. Think turn-key. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our project management but our capacity to deploy. Widgets International has revamped the abstraction of user communities. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not granular. If you transition seamlessly, you may have to seize strategically. The metrics for backward-compatible, blog-based convergence are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for iterating. We invariably orchestrate impactful 60/60/24/7/365 compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C Total Quality Control and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement.