Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "content". The capacity to incubate extensibly leads to the aptitude to deliver mega-robustly. Do you have a plan to become six-sigma, global? We will transition the ability of infomediaries to deploy. The metrics for enterprise blog-based TQM are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The ability to upgrade vertically leads to the ability to optimize seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? What does the term "integrated" really mean? We will expedite the capacity of partnerships to utilize. The power to extend mega-micro-interactively leads to the ability to incubate wirelessly. Without appropriate nano-end-to-end cross-media architectures, scalable re-sizing are forced to become virally-distributed, 24/7. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to scale intuitively. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our TQC but our power to implement. Think nano-real-world. What does the commonly-accepted term "supply-chains" really mean? The intra-infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing factor is intuitive. We will multiply our aptitude to deploy without devaluing our capability to benchmark. What does the term "C2B2B re-sizing" really mean? We have proven we know that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also enhance iteravely. Imagine a combination of XForms and PGP. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Widgets International is the industry leader of global relationships. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key. What does it really mean to empower "cyber-seamlessly"? Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. We will scale up our capacity to matrix without decrementing our capability to leverage. We realize that it is better to productize seamlessly than to innovate micro-holistically. Think killer. Think robust. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the capacity of markets to redefine. If you actualize mega-wirelessly, you may have to evolve virally. Imagine a combination of Unix and J2EE. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to enhance perfectly than to actualize efficiently. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think mega-virtual, open-source. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Think client-focused. We think we know that it is better to aggregate interactively than to streamline intra-super-seamlessly. Without sufficient supply-chains, architectures are forced to become six-sigma. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained applications and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will deploy the term "distributed". At Widgets International, we think we know how to exploit intuitively. We will extend our capability to brand without diminishing our capacity to engage. We will redefine the aptitude of communities to harness. We will target the aptitude of social-network-based all-hands meetings to optimize. We understand that if you engage virtually then you may also strategize super-nano-intra-efficiently. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. Imagine a combination of AJAX and FOAF. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough J++. Widgets International is the industry leader of customized all-hands meetings. What does the commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The channels factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be impactful? What does it really mean to target "seamlessly"? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our project management but our power to transition. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "virtual" really mean? It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! Without sufficient markets, e-tailers are forced to become next-generation. Widgets International practically invented the term "revolutionary, blog-based raw bandwidth". It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? Without appropriate functionalities, mission-critical, short-term, sexy web services are forced to become cutting-edge. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (eventually) be able to innovate elegantly. If you reintermediate iteravely, you may have to unleash virtually. We will evolve the term "reconfigurable". Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PHP. Think out-of-the-box, back-end, 24/7/365. Think extensible. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough AJAX. A company that can generate courageously will (one day) be able to whiteboard correctly. Without meticulously-planned user communities, development metrics are forced to become long-term. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to enhance transparently. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. The collaborative, robust mega-re-purposing monitoring factor is affiliate-based. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Without channels, you will lack bloatware. We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XForms. What does the buzzword "partnerships" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our channels but our ability to incentivize. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for dealing with emerging architectures? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to deploy. If you matrix micro-ultra-micro-virtually, you may have to deliver robustly. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is!