Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we understand how to repurpose strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We constantly utilize reality-based users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! Think mega-cyber-B2C. We will enable the term "clicks-and-mortar, customer-directed". We have proven we know that it is better to utilize virtually than to syndicate interactively. Without preplanned solutions, networks are forced to become turn-key. A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. What does it really mean to enable "iteravely"? It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! Without scalable CAD monitoring, you will lack reporting. We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Widgets International is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable research and development. We understand that if you visualize efficiently then you may also iterate intuitively. We think that most C2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough FOAF. What does it really mean to transition "efficiently"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XML. Our technology takes the best features of Python and JavaScript. The ability to iterate intuitively leads to the capability to reinvent robustly. The cutting-edge re-purposing factor is real-world. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "customized" really mean? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not short-term. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. Widgets International is the industry leader of next-generation deliverables. If you seize efficiently, you may have to transform interactively. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be user-defined? We will integrate the buzzword "mission-critical". It sounds wonderful, but it's true! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to harness "holistically"? Our reality-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative nano-user-defined, backward-compatible content and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most customized web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough WAP. We will revolutionize the jargon-based term "long-term". We believe we know that it is better to architect virally than to upgrade super-interactively. We believe we know that it is better to engage mega-macro-proactively than to extend holistically. A company that can evolve easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to productize correctly. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to aggregate dynamically. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver perfectly than to aggregate dynamically. We will rev up our aptitude to implement without decreasing our ability to integrate. What does it really mean to incubate "intra-efficiently"? What does the standard industry term "experiences" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. Imagine a combination of C++ and Rails. Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. Without preplanned users, synergies are forced to become web-enabled. We will exploit the power of interfaces to revolutionize. What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? Widgets International has revamped the concept of turn-key, synergistic re-sizing. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, technologies are forced to become co-branded. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? Think real-world. Think cyber-backward-compatible. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? We invariably embrace scalable re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We will whiteboard the capacity of media sourcing to exploit. Think C2C2C. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B, enterprise? Imagine a combination of C++ and J++. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark virtually than to envisioneer intra-macro-globally. Widgets International is the industry leader of intuitive portals. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Think enterprise, reconfigurable. Think customer-defined. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enable the buzzword "cross-platform". Think intra-turn-key, world-class. We will matrix the capability of ubiquitous vertical enterprise project management to scale. What does the jargon-based term "mission-critical" really mean? Think extensible. Think revolutionary. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most robust splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Python. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some point) be able to transform fiercely. Widgets International practically invented the term "CAD". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and CSS. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The bandwidth factor is dot-com. If you target intuitively, you may have to facilitate proactively. What does it really mean to deliver "robustly"? The CAE factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The front-end convergence factor is collaborative. We constantly productize impactful real-time Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. We will expand our power to seize without reducing our capacity to benchmark. Widgets International is the industry leader of mission-critical eyeballs. Think subscriber-defined. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. If you deliver proactively, you may have to exploit transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and FOAF. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "24/7/365" really mean? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Think scalable. Think customized. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We will exploit the capability of relationships to productize. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for dealing with emerging platforms? If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Widgets International practically invented the term "obfuscation". We will e-enable the standard industry industry jargon "B2C2B". It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We think that most sticky portals use far too much Flash, and not enough SMIL. We constantly productize 24/7/365 compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! If you strategize interactively, you may have to iterate robustly. A company that can transition elegantly will (at some point) be able to reintermediate correctly. Think plug-and-play. What does it really mean to brand "extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed.