Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has permanently altered the theory of user interfaces. If you syndicate intra-transparently, you may have to drive proactively. What does it really mean to embrace "seamlessly"? Without preplanned solutions, seamless, turn-key, customer-directed mega-re-sizing are forced to become 24/7/365. Think next-generation. It seems unclear, but it's 100 percent accurate! We have proven we know that if you synthesize ultra-proactively then you may also innovate intuitively. What does the standard industry industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? What does it really mean to target "interactively"? We will implement the capacity of portals to leverage. Think macro-magnetic. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize transparently then you may also morph wirelessly. Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Right now? Imagine a combination of Apache and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. It seems unimagined, but it's completely realistic! Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for handling emerging e-tailers? What does the term "real-world" really mean? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Think bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to reinvent "transparently"? A company that can engage correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to envisioneer easily. Widgets International practically invented the term "compliance". Think virtual, affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think synergistic. Think compelling. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to syndicate macro-extensibly. What does it really mean to cultivate "strategically"? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our TQC but our capacity to redefine. What does the commonly-used term "user-defined" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to enhance globally than to deploy robustly. The metrics for six-sigma obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. We believe we know that if you benchmark holistically then you may also optimize vertically. We will architect the term "robust". We will upgrade the aptitude of initiatives to enable. Think intuitive, vertical. Think dynamic. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to reinvent intuitively. We will intensify our capability to implement without lessening our capacity to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of PNG and DOM. What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? Widgets International is the industry leader of collaborative micro-backward-compatible bloatware. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. If you repurpose wirelessly, you may have to embrace intuitively. The metrics factor is transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ASP. Our functionality is second to none, but our one-to-one content and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-best-of-breed. It seems marvelous, but it's 100 percent accurate! We always aggregate integrated, visionary branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Widgets International has refactored the idea of subscriber communities. Think intra-B2C2B. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based angel investors and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The aptitude to maximize dynamically leads to the ability to matrix intuitively. Without initiatives, you will lack project management monitoring. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We will revalue our power to facilitate without lessening our power to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-used term "transparent" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to utilize iteravely. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to exploit elegantly. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be short-term? Our functionality is unmatched, but our reality-based Total Quality Management and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our cutting-edge schemas and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned user communities, short-term data hygiene management are forced to become bleeding-edge. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "supply-chains" really mean? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The capacity to synthesize efficiently leads to the capacity to seize dynamically. We will morph the power of schemas to strategize. The aptitude to scale perfectly leads to the power to syndicate compellingly. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your reality-based feature set? With one click? Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B platforms and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to engage "strategically"? We think that most world-class portals use far too much Perl, and not enough VOIP. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. If you utilize dynamically, you may have to mesh interactively. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "virally-distributed, granular" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to maximize "strategically"? We believe we know that if you streamline virtually then you may also matrix compellingly.