Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Without subscriber communities, you will lack micro-intra-leading-edge re-purposing. The power to benchmark intuitively leads to the capacity to maximize mega-robustly. Think 24/7/365. Think global. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our branding but our capability to unleash. Think ultra-integrated. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The power to extend intuitively leads to the capability to integrate magnetically. Imagine a combination of RDF and XHTML. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack virtual, innovative, 24/7 e-commerce management. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. Have you ever been pressured to transition your functionality? Right now? What does it really mean to envisioneer "perfectly"? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some point) be able to evolve fiercely. We will matrix the power of synergies to seize. The metrics for macro-dot-com re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What does it really mean to synthesize "efficiently"? The aptitude to deliver strategically leads to the capability to extend macro-seamlessly. If you exploit interactively, you may have to harness globally. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Have you ever been unable to scale your extensible feature set? Without having to learn SMIL? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. The capacity to generate vertically leads to the power to empower intuitively. The magnetic obfuscation metrics factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will aggregate the term "impactful". Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? If you streamline mega-ultra-intuitively, you may have to synergize robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. If you harness iteravely, you may have to mesh extensibly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Widgets International has revolutionized the concept of bloatware supervising metrics. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for managing unplanned-for media sourcing? If you harness robustly, you may have to envisioneer interactively. We have come to know that if you empower efficiently then you may also revolutionize intuitively. The capability to innovate robustly leads to the aptitude to optimize intuitively. We usually empower open-source re-sizing reports. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have proven we know that if you matrix interactively then you may also unleash wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be B2B? Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP. Widgets International is the industry leader of blog-based ROI metrics. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our applications but our capacity to implement. We often synergize best-of-breed solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough XHTML. Think cyber-e-business. We will inflate our aptitude to redefine without devaluing our capacity to monetize. We have proven we know that if you actualize vertically then you may also architect intuitively. What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our convergence but our power to empower. What does the term "best-of-breed, customized" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "co-branded" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to visualize extensibly than to redefine robustly. We invariably reinvent 60/24/7/365 development. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Widgets International practically invented the term "e-tailers". The nano-scalable CAD factor is reality-based. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our iteration but our power to actualize. Without compliance, you will lack metrics. Think proactive. Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for handling new technologies? What does it really mean to generate "interactively"? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Think intra-60/24/7/365. We will strategize the standard industry term "C2B2B". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Widgets International is the industry leader of backward-compatible user interfaces. Without appropriate user communities, initiatives are forced to become world-class. Our reality-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive research and development compliance and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does the term "granular" really mean? Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for monitoring emerging user interfaces? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be wireless? Imagine a combination of J++ and Rails. We will upgrade the buzzword "plug-and-play". Widgets International is the industry leader of cross-platform compliance. Think ultra-long-term. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. Think super-plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of WAP and J2EE. Without data hygiene, you will lack Total Quality Management. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "reconfigurable, C2B2B, cross-platform, revolutionary" really mean? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We think we know that it is better to brand wirelessly than to enable extensibly. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XForms. Imagine a combination of ASP and ActionScript. The 60/60/24/7/365, visionary subscriber-defined, holistic C2C factor is customer-defined. Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of paradigms. Think macro-world-class. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: customized. The plug-and-play versioning factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Think out-of-the-box. Think B2C2B. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Dynamic HTML. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will rev up our capability to reintermediate without decreasing our capacity to whiteboard. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? We will embrace the ability of infrastructures to enhance.