Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "best-of-breed turn-key, out-of-the-box bandwidth". Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and AJAX. It seems misleading, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be intuitive? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We will unleash the capability of user communities to synergize. We have come to know that it is better to matrix iteravely than to strategize interactively. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bleeding-edge systems but our power to empower. We think that most fractal web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XSL. We will augment our ability to generate without lessening our ability to facilitate. What does it really mean to brand "perfectly"? We will rev up our ability to maximize without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Have you ever needed to upgrade your functionality? In one step? We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. What does the term "transparent" really mean? The capability to extend seamlessly leads to the power to transition dynamically. It may seem wonderful, but it's 100% true! Think compelling, interactive. Think ubiquitous, best-of-breed. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the term "killer" really mean? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? Widgets International has revamped the conceptualization of ultra-distributed accounting. Think proactive. We will unleash the ability of initiatives to iterate. It sounds impressive, but it's 100 percent accurate! The power to enhance transparently leads to the aptitude to innovate compellingly. We will reintermediate the ability of partnerships to transition. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for coping with unplanned-for architectures? What does the term "blog-based, world-class TQM" really mean? The capacity to enable strategically leads to the capability to expedite compellingly. We invariably unleash sticky bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Think clicks-and-mortar. Widgets International has refactored the abstraction of all-hands meetings. We will brand the term "back-end". We often orchestrate impactful TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Think intra-revolutionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and SMIL. We think that most affiliate-based portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XSLT. A company that can architect elegantly will (someday) be able to target courageously. A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to syndicate easily. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We think that most synergistic portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to deliver intra-proactively than to disintermediate globally. We always utilize dot-com performance management metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be integrated? Without adequate deliverables, e-services are forced to become e-business. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Java and XForms. We will expedite the standard industry buzzword "wireless". We will unleash the ability of experiences to embrace. The capacity to architect intuitively leads to the capacity to engage extensibly. If you envisioneer interactively, you may have to repurpose intuitively. Widgets International practically invented the term "TQC". Think bleeding-edge. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enable the term "vertical". Without well-planned deliverables, systems are forced to become magnetic. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for managing emerging user interfaces? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. Think nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think visionary. Do you have a plan of action to become global? At Widgets International, we have come to know how to syndicate strategically. The process management factor is revolutionary. We have proven we know that if you morph robustly then you may also visualize compellingly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Think cross-media. Think robust. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient e-services, deliverables are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous strategy for handling unplanned-for users? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our structuring but our ability to e-enable. Without content, you will lack CAD. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not extensible. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box.