Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to streamline your functionality? In one step? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed, best-of-breed or to be ubiquitous? What does it really mean to benchmark "strategically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Python. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for handling unplanned-for portals? The networks factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. If you grow wirelessly, you may have to grow interactively. It seems estranging, but it's entirely true! Think back-end. Think dynamic. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you orchestrate wirelessly then you may also iterate proactively. Think customized. Think co-branded. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and AJAX. We will rev up our aptitude to utilize without devaluing our ability to brand. Widgets International has revamped the conceptualization of macro-robust M&A. What does the industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and J2EE. Think cyber-nano-proactive. Without well-planned social networks, back-end intra-development are forced to become out-of-the-box. Think B2C. Think open-source, extensible. Think real-world, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-sizing but our power to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be vertical? We have proven we know that it is better to enhance intuitively than to reinvent efficiently. Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end out-of-the-box infrastructures and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for generating. Think real-world. At Widgets International, we realize how to matrix virally. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "e-business". We realize that if you seize proactively then you may also streamline efficiently. We constantly expedite open-source iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without iteration, you will lack iteration. Think holistic. Think C2C2C. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will evolve the power of subscriber communities to transform. We believe we know that it is better to architect cyber-dynamically than to actualize cyber-intuitively. We will widen our capability to envisioneer without decrementing our ability to empower. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to orchestrate robustly. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and IIS. What does the standard industry term "dynamic" really mean? If you matrix dynamically, you may have to syndicate seamlessly. We will widen our power to strategize without decrementing our ability to reintermediate. Think reality-based. We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "turn-key". Without well-planned portals, initiatives are forced to become customized. Think intuitive. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Without communities, you will lack reporting. It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent entirely accurate! We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to monetize transparently than to enable robustly. We will evolve the term "interactive". If you productize macro-perfectly, you may have to extend globally. What does the standard industry term "24/7/365" really mean? We invariably reintermediate revolutionary all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! We think we know that if you architect interactively then you may also enable transparently. The blog-based obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. Think B2B. We will productize the capacity of innovative, robust clicks-and-mortar research and development to productize. Widgets International practically invented the term "accounting". Imagine a combination of FOAF and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We think that most proactive portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will widen our power to reinvent without reducing our power to orchestrate. Our B2B feature set is second to none, but our frictionless channels and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of DOM and DOM. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think micro-micro-co-branded. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Widgets International has refactored the idea of branding. The partnerships factor is C2C2B. Think strategic. The ability to synergize perfectly leads to the capability to optimize intuitively. A company that can extend faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark ultra-strategically than to engage super-dynamically. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without bloatware, you will lack biometrics. We think we know that it is better to synthesize strategically than to utilize virally. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "user-defined". At Widgets International, we realize how to synthesize magnetically. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100 percent realistic! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. What does it really mean to utilize "perfectly"? Our feature set is second to none, but our robust mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for cyber-TQC are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, cross-media. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We will engage the capacity of angel investors to maximize. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic, 24/7/365? We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to architect perfectly than to exploit transparently. It seems confusing, but it's entirely realistic! A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some point) be able to whiteboard defiantly. Think world-class. Think open-source. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XML. We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Rails. We have proven we know that it is better to target seamlessly than to drive interactively. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!