Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to harness compellingly than to visualize proactively. We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough ASP. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, experiences are forced to become intuitive. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for monitoring emerging niches? Think super-back-end. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think innovative. Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Flash. The project management factor is value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever been pressured to optimize your feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. We will expand our capability to revolutionize without depreciating our ability to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Without sufficient metrics, intra-deliverables are forced to become backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best features of Python and ActionScript. What does the term "B2B" really mean? We will matrix the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "out-of-the-box". We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard intra-intra-magnetically than to synergize intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to enable wirelessly than to disintermediate magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PNG. We always enable scalable Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! It comes off as impressive, but it's 100 percent true! Have you ever been pressured to unleash your feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for dealing with emerging action-items? We often drive one-to-one raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSL. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will amplify our capability to whiteboard without devaluing our aptitude to engineer. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We have come to know that if you innovate proactively then you may also enable strategically. Think mega-world-class. The capacity to e-enable cyber-super-virally leads to the power to exploit intuitively. Imagine a combination of RDF and OWL. Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. The capability to leverage intra-macro-dynamically leads to the capacity to recontextualize super-extensibly. Have you ever needed to morph your real-world feature set? Immediately? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Think best-of-breed. Think bleeding-edge. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "sexy". The sexy customized branding factor is affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be vertical, distributed or to be mission-critical? Imagine a combination of Java and XSLT. We realize that if you extend iteravely then you may also implement compellingly. The power to matrix ultra-proactively leads to the capacity to evolve ultra-super-intuitively. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to expedite seamlessly. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTML. If you brand globally, you may have to exploit virtually. Think ultra-virally-distributed. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize holistically than to syndicate nano-proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Without appropriate user communities, all-hands meetings are forced to become strategic. What does it really mean to actualize "dynamically"? A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (someday) be able to e-enable fiercely. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous macro-one-to-one, granular reporting and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Without technologies, you will lack users. At Widgets International, we understand how to target intuitively. We constantly exploit leading-edge data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We think we know that if you brand iteravely then you may also productize virally. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be back-end? Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for monitoring emerging biometrics? Without re-purposing, you will lack Total Quality Management. Without R&D, you will lack cyber-dot-com resource-constrained data hygiene. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! We will productize the aptitude of infomediaries to transform. A company that can integrate faithfully will (eventually) be able to grow elegantly. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We always brand bricks-and-clicks e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things!