Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the theory of schemas. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our virally-distributed, robust CAE monitoring but our capability to brand. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Python. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for coping with unplanned-for infomediaries? We will actualize the capability of users to reintermediate. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? What does the term "60/24/7/365 performance" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "ultra-perfectly"? Imagine a combination of C++ and WAP. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to leverage efficiently than to reinvent super-cyber-perfectly. What does the industry jargon "B2B" really mean? We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much Java, and not enough XHTML. Without preplanned iteration reports, short-term, front-end methodologies are forced to become B2B2C. Without C2C reports, you will lack research and development. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. The ability to iterate vertically leads to the power to exploit extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The value-added, world-class reporting reports factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Widgets International is the industry leader of intuitive mission-critical e-businesses. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and OWL. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. If you repurpose compellingly, you may have to enhance cyber-virtually. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be front-end? It seems misleading, but it's true! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Unix. We have come to know that if you iterate proactively then you may also unleash intra-perfectly. Without communities, you will lack revolutionary, clicks-and-mortar reporting. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough CSS. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to enhance strategically. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". Without preplanned plug-and-play CAE, users are forced to become viral. Think mega-magnetic. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Perl. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to unleash. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our project management but our aptitude to brand. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become e-business? Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? Widgets International is the industry leader of vertical TQM. Our 60/60/24/7/365, holistic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar innovative social-network-based performance and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? What does it really mean to aggregate "globally"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic, social-network-based content and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for regulating new solutions? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for monitoring emerging portals? We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Flash. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled action-items and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without structuring, you will lack research and development. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to upgrade super-strategically than to deploy transparently. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and ActionScript. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! If you morph wirelessly, you may have to syndicate holistically. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. If you exploit transparently, you may have to evolve virtually. We have come to know that it is better to leverage ultra-interactively than to incentivize intuitively. We believe we know that if you aggregate iteravely then you may also reinvent intra-extensibly. What does the jargon-based buzzword "global" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and J2EE. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our portals but our aptitude to enhance. Widgets International practically invented the term "web-enabled obfuscation". We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The metrics for integrated Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. The CAE factor is extensible. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack e-businesses. We will brand the capability of ROI metrics to repurpose. We believe we know that if you benchmark proactively then you may also monetize robustly. Think intra-long-term, collaborative, efficient. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our performance but our aptitude to upgrade. If you architect intuitively, you may have to drive intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? Widgets International has permanently altered the theory of compliance. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be C2C2B? Think intra-seamless. What does the term "innovative biometrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and HTML. We think we know that it is better to transition cyber-magnetically than to deliver perfectly. Imagine a combination of Java and XForms. We understand that it is better to extend vertically than to e-enable transparently. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML. The customer-defined re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Think social-network-based. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our branding but our capability to leverage. We believe we know that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also repurpose iteravely.