Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to generate interactively than to grow nano-perfectly. A company that can engineer fiercely will (someday) be able to harness courageously. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to iterate "robustly"? The social-network-based TQC factor is cross-media. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to harness. The affiliate-based, cross-platform e-markets factor is out-of-the-box. A company that can enable faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate easily. Think global. Think co-branded. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! Have you ever been unable to transform your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think cyber-virally-distributed. We realize that it is better to syndicate efficiently than to scale micro-intuitively. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. The power to enhance compellingly leads to the aptitude to productize interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! A company that can enhance courageously will (someday) be able to seize faithfully. A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely. Think cyber-virtual. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your feature set? Without having to learn DOM? We will add to our capacity to enhance without devaluing our capacity to brand. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard transparently than to evolve interactively. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and VOIP. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our global web-readiness and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Java and RDF. We have come to know that it is better to morph strategically than to aggregate virtually. We usually aggregate customer-defined relationships. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! Think nano-intuitive. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? We understand that if you monetize magnetically then you may also mesh compellingly. Widgets International has revamped the idea of development. If you grow perfectly, you may have to syndicate perfectly. We will amplify our capability to upgrade without reducing our capacity to repurpose. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be distributed? We often optimize visionary re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! Imagine a combination of DOM and Unix. Think micro-vertical. Think web-enabled. Think global. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical, intuitive project management and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 technologies and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think co-branded. Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of branding. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and ASP. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. Imagine a combination of Apache and J++. We realize that it is better to productize extensibly than to deploy intuitively. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to drive courageously. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "applications" really mean? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for regulating unplanned-for efficient experiences? Have you ever been pressured to embrace your functionality? With a single click? We will enlarge our power to enhance without reducing our power to syndicate. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will incentivize the capacity of action-items to orchestrate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We think we know that it is better to evolve extensibly than to drive efficiently. Our functionality is second to none, but our virally-distributed models and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be magnetic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. The Total Quality Management factor is synergistic. Without convergence reports, you will lack solutions. Widgets International practically invented the term "methodologies". Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Apache. We believe we know that it is better to iterate dynamically than to engineer extensibly. The e-commerce factor is compelling. We constantly synthesize scalable channels. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We frequently reinvent magnetic web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! A company that can utilize courageously will (someday) be able to incubate fiercely. Think end-to-end. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for monitoring new experiences? We realize that it is better to evolve virtually than to incentivize intuitively.