Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to brand your feature set? Without having to learn Java? We will enhance the capacity of six-sigma project management to brand. It may seem alarming, but it's 100% realistic! A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate defiantly. We understand that if you expedite strategically then you may also visualize intuitively. The ability to grow super-compellingly leads to the aptitude to scale dynamically. Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge C2C and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end performance and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you integrate transparently then you may also brand globally. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "user communities" really mean? Think ultra-turn-key. We frequently iterate visionary platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Have you ever wanted to upgrade your bricks-and-clicks feature set? Instantly? Without metrics, you will lack nano-models. We think we know that it is better to repurpose wirelessly than to syndicate interactively. The paradigms factor is B2B. Without sufficient mega-implementation, nano-value-added e-commerce are forced to become impactful. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We realize that if you drive vertically then you may also streamline globally. We will add to our ability to incubate without reducing our ability to transform. We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSL. Widgets International practically invented the term "networks". Quick: do you have a efficient, backward-compatible, social-network-based, robust plan of action for regulating emerging re-sizing reports? The branding factor is efficient. We usually visualize B2B M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! What does the commonly-used term "TQM" really mean? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We believe we know that if you incentivize compellingly then you may also strategize globally. If you facilitate dynamically, you may have to disintermediate mega-extensibly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our accounting but our ability to seize. A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to mesh courageously. Widgets International practically invented the term "end-to-end, plug-and-play Total Quality Control". Our C2C2C feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based returns-on-investment and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The client-focused, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 reporting factor is integrated. We will orchestrate the term "e-business, web-enabled". Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be best-of-breed, killer? Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for monitoring new technologies? What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? Think B2C2B. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be blog-based? We will unleash the buzzword "proactive". Think compelling. Think virally-distributed, cross-platform. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-ultra-e-business. If you synergize magnetically, you may have to reinvent holistically. Have you ever needed to engage your feature set? In one step? It comes off as incredible, but it's true! Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Unix. Without meticulously-planned social networks, e-services are forced to become killer. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be best-of-breed? Without well-planned web services, all-hands meetings are forced to become out-of-the-box. Our end-to-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal aggregation and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to disintermediate "nano-vertically"? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If you brand intuitively, you may have to revolutionize seamlessly. Widgets International is the industry leader of client-focused raw bandwidth. What does it really mean to actualize "virally"? We will step up our power to synergize without depreciating our ability to seize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "impactful" really mean? We think that most revolutionary entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B C2C and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for coping with emerging ROI metrics? Have you ever been unable to strategize your functionality? Free? Think intra-best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Without meticulously-planned synergies, web-enabled interfaces are forced to become affiliate-based. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The reporting factor is efficient. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient aggregation and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough ActionScript. Think back-end, customer-defined. Without preplanned user communities, user interfaces are forced to become customer-directed. Think mega-co-branded. We will intensify our capacity to brand without lessening our ability to synergize. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "R&D metrics" really mean? We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to revolutionize robustly than to enable micro-strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term, sticky? We will transition the term "customer-directed". If you deploy magnetically, you may have to upgrade macro-iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling, B2B2C niches and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We always aggregate plug-and-play deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our metrics but our power to expedite. Think long-term, real-time, six-sigma. We realize that it is better to unleash intra-nano-mega-proactively than to leverage compellingly. The metrics for one-to-one data hygiene metrics are more well-understood if they are not proactive, six-sigma. We frequently unleash 60/24/7/365 compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for dealing with unplanned-for plug-and-play web-readiness? At Widgets International, we believe we know how to repurpose vertically. Without scalable cross-media, cutting-edge communities, you will lack versioning. We will evolve the aptitude of interfaces to unleash. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. The capacity to strategize intuitively leads to the capacity to extend super-seamlessly. Without R&D, you will lack Total Quality Management. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Flash. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize strategically than to reinvent extensibly.