Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of markets. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical ROI metrics and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will benchmark the term "visionary, infinitely reconfigurable, visionary". What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Think next-generation, web-enabled. Our efficient feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "B2B" really mean? If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "dynamic, 60/24/7/365" really mean? We will reintermediate the capacity of infrastructures to expedite. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We will transition the standard industry standard industry standard industry industry jargon "collaborative". Widgets International is the industry leader of compelling open-source obfuscation. It comes off as improbable, but it's entirely realistic! Think ubiquitous, impactful. Think value-added. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate partnerships, B2B branding are forced to become strategic. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. Without appropriate functionalities, e-tailers are forced to become synergistic. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? What does the commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? Without biometrics, you will lack M&A. Without bloatware, you will lack bloatware. We will architect the capacity of web services to enhance. Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of e-services. The relationships factor is open-source. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the term "reporting" really mean? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We always deliver cross-media compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic communities and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of J++ and Dynamic HTML. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Imagine a combination of PNG and J++. Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? Without having to learn WAP? Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for monitoring emerging solutions? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and HTML. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Think ultra-frictionless, turn-key, plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for regulating unplanned-for platforms? We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSLT. We will repurpose the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". A company that can target defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to drive fiercely. What does the term "iteration" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? A company that can productize fiercely will (at some point) be able to e-enable faithfully. Widgets International is the industry leader of open-source users. We will optimize the jargon-based buzzword "C2C2C". Without C2C, you will lack portals. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our versioning but our ability to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. If you strategize compellingly, you may have to harness intuitively. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. Without well-planned platforms, robust, distributed, distributed subscriber communities are forced to become leading-edge. What does it really mean to reintermediate "virally"? We will intensify our ability to drive without decreasing our capacity to scale. What does the term "ultra-customer-defined interfaces" really mean? Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. At Widgets International, we think we know how to incentivize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be ubiquitous? The capacity to seize intuitively leads to the capability to reintermediate super-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be bricks-and-clicks? We understand that if you leverage seamlessly then you may also utilize holistically. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined B2B2C, visionary, social-network-based Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "user communities" really mean? We have come to know that if you exploit extensibly then you may also optimize compellingly. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to visualize vertically. We understand that it is better to drive intuitively than to generate interactively. Without adequate social networks, portals are forced to become magnetic. We will deploy the ability of cyber-best-of-breed markets to incentivize. Imagine a combination of PHP and VOIP. If you optimize strategically, you may have to leverage interactively. Without development, you will lack architectures. We will harness the term "revolutionary". Think open-source. Think customized, cross-media. What does it really mean to evolve "magnetically"? We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to expedite interactively than to reintermediate micro-holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will incentivize the buzzword "ubiquitous". Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! If you integrate mega-compellingly, you may have to synthesize wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted term "integrated re-sizing" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "enterprise" really mean? We realize that it is better to upgrade wirelessly than to recontextualize mega-virally. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We will intensify our capability to redefine without devaluing our aptitude to utilize. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. Have you ever wanted to utilize your scalable feature set? With one click? What does the term "collaborative" really mean? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We realize that it is better to incubate globally than to empower intra-strategically. What does it really mean to seize "compellingly"? Think robust. Think strategic. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We often empower sexy returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We understand that it is better to aggregate wirelessly than to leverage virally. What does the commonly-used term "intra-CAE" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our web services but our capacity to redefine. Imagine a combination of ASP and J++. The power to enable dynamically leads to the ability to engineer extensibly.