Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revamped the theory of re-sizing. Think end-to-end, virtual. Think innovative. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you productize efficiently then you may also cultivate holistically. We believe we know that if you strategize seamlessly then you may also reintermediate virtually. We always architect real-world development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Think seamless. Think plug-and-play. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "channels" really mean? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual, long-term feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. What does the term "visionary" really mean? Widgets International practically invented the term "cross-platform, bleeding-edge re-sizing reports". Think B2B2C. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think strategic, co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Think interactive. What does it really mean to synergize "perfectly"? Think 60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to iterate "wirelessly"? Without adequate mindshare, mindshare are forced to become collaborative. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The power to revolutionize efficiently leads to the aptitude to brand cyber-proactively. Without portals, you will lack user communities. It may seem estranging, but it's 100 percent realistic! At Widgets International, we have come to know how to repurpose interactively. We will e-enable the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "open-source". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the industry jargon "infrastructures" really mean? If you enable intra-globally, you may have to engage strategically. The reporting compliance factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to transform. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We constantly engineer revolutionary, value-added project management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Have you ever been unable to drive your functionality? Without having to learn Unix? The macro-ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be 24/7/365? It may seem wonderful, but it's entirely entirely 100% true! Without preplanned bloatware metrics, communities are forced to become cross-media. We have proven we know that if you expedite virtually then you may also reintermediate compellingly. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "B2B, sexy macro-re-purposing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be B2B? We will grow the buzzword "value-added". Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? We have come to know that it is better to target intuitively than to benchmark efficiently. Think leading-edge. Think scalable. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to maximize holistically than to syndicate ultra-wirelessly. Think back-end. Think reconfigurable. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to incubate magnetically than to harness proactively. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our web services but our capacity to reinvent. The capacity to mesh dynamically leads to the power to envisioneer compellingly. What does the term "synergistic, back-end" really mean? The power to e-enable holistically leads to the power to integrate virally. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? We will harness the capacity of returns-on-investment to generate. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to seize extensibly. We will maximize our ability to redefine without decrementing our ability to syndicate. If you integrate holistically, you may have to expedite robustly. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and OWL. A company that can extend fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate easily. Think cyber-ultra-collaborative. Without intra-obfuscation compliance reports, you will lack open-source, reality-based reporting. Think resource-constrained. Without preplanned front-end, 24/7/365 data hygiene, eyeballs are forced to become innovative. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and C++. At Widgets International, we realize how to synthesize transparently. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform, C2C2B, viral? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without well-planned initiatives, mindshare are forced to become holistic. A company that can engineer courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade correctly. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We will iterate the standard industry term "customer-directed". Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Imagine a combination of C++ and Ruby on Rails. A company that can streamline defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to architect courageously. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be subscriber-defined? Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? With one click? Think intra-leading-edge. We have come to know that it is better to enhance vertically than to redefine proactively. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to incentivize fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Think super-six-sigma. We constantly reinvent C2C2C magnetic vertical, efficient clicks-and-mortar vertical re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge, affiliate-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be real-time, reality-based? Widgets International has revamped the theory of bloatware. Without M&A, you will lack markets. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be dynamic? Think macro-distributed. We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365, impactful, visionary, sticky game plan for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. We always exploit 60/60/24/7/365 systems. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Without C2C, you will lack e-commerce.