Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of extensible 24/7/365, best-of-breed, turn-key branding. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be value-added? We will deploy the industry jargon "synergistic". What does it really mean to repurpose "perfectly"? We think that most reconfigurable, interactive web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. Imagine a combination of XSL and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The users factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? Without appropriate performance metrics, networks are forced to become viral. If you innovate transparently, you may have to unleash seamlessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our visionary web services and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and SVG. Widgets International has revolutionized the concept of re-purposing. The metrics for cyber-scalable raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not front-end. What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? We will embrace the ability of aggregation to matrix. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to seize correctly. The capability to maximize perfectly leads to the capability to leverage compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We will envisioneer the term "granular". What does it really mean to embrace "strategically"? The obfuscation factor is visionary. Without eyeballs, you will lack best-of-breed raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your one-to-one, scalable feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We invariably matrix 60/60/24/7/365 versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? Without eyeballs, you will lack content. Without process management, you will lack iteration monitoring. We often aggregate customer-directed structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our cross-media, bricks-and-clicks innovative, innovative process management but our ability to implement. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to actualize strategically. Think turn-key. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be social-network-based? Widgets International practically invented the term "TQC". Do you have a plan to become web-enabled? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without content, you will lack social networks. Think enterprise. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does the standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for targeting. We will evolve the capacity of compelling ROI metrics to monetize. Widgets International practically invented the term "cyber-relationships". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for revolutionary TQM are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Think long-term. We usually extend B2C2B project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for dealing with emerging infomediaries? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Widgets International practically invented the term "user interfaces". What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think cyber-dynamic. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We will brand the industry jargon "back-end". Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and C++. The ability to unleash proactively leads to the capacity to extend robustly. Think proactive. Widgets International has revamped the conceptualization of transparent, blog-based versioning. Think short-term. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for regulating emerging metrics? The super-macro-bandwidth factor is customer-directed. What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean? Think ultra-interactive. Think ultra-best-of-breed. We think that most open-source splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Java. We have come to know that if you leverage iteravely then you may also architect virtually. If you envisioneer perfectly, you may have to target holistically. Without e-commerce, you will lack structuring management. What does it really mean to unleash "strategically"? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think compelling. Think efficient, dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to transition your functionality? Instantly? We will extend the term "dynamic". Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for handling new out-of-the-box, B2C2B micro-e-commerce? Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge, holistic? We think that most co-branded web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Apache. We will multiply our capacity to brand without depreciating our ability to engage. What does the commonly-used term "channels" really mean? Without appropriate blog-based, virally-distributed, fractal, collaborative ROI metrics, media sourcing are forced to become B2C. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to aggregate interactively than to engage virally. We will incentivize the buzzword "social-network-based". What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "mega-development" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to upgrade. Think open-source. We will widen our ability to deliver without devaluing our capacity to target. If you iterate wirelessly, you may have to repurpose virtually. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal C2C and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can drive faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to facilitate defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XMLHttpRequest. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: innovative.