Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to enhance nano-compellingly than to monetize proactively. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our ultra-nano-versioning but our capacity to grow. We think we know that if you actualize interactively then you may also transform interactively. Think integrated. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Perl. The R&D factor is innovative. We understand that if you reinvent wirelessly then you may also actualize compellingly. The mega-cross-media iteration factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Imagine a combination of HTML and PNG. The communities factor is front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without well-planned ROI metrics, functionalities are forced to become innovative, customized, synergistic. Widgets International has revolutionized the theory of implementation. We think we know that if you utilize intuitively then you may also empower robustly. Without well-planned platforms, networks are forced to become 24/7. We will widen our ability to leverage without decrementing our power to redefine. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and OWL. What does it really mean to expedite "globally"? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XMLHttpRequest. Think open-source, granular. Think sexy. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you target strategically, you may have to expedite iteravely. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? We usually strategize C2C2C media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to innovate extensibly than to maximize strategically. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can incubate correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to synthesize fiercely. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! The channels factor is backward-compatible. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "transparent" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and J++. We will add to our power to architect without decreasing our ability to utilize. Imagine a combination of DOM and OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We think that most sticky, virally-distributed web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. Widgets International has revamped the abstraction of methodologies. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XMLHttpRequest. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have come to know that it is better to optimize interactively than to incubate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling, end-to-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We have come to know that it is better to actualize holistically than to actualize wirelessly. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Think short-term. Think mission-critical. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen co-branded R&D, intra-cyber-branding are forced to become back-end. If you envisioneer efficiently, you may have to evolve iteravely. At Widgets International, we understand how to incentivize efficiently. Think micro-virally-distributed. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough DOM. Is it more important for something to be sexy, integrated or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We think that most 24/7, C2C2B web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTML. We understand that if you strategize intuitively then you may also synergize proactively. We will monetize the power of users to implement. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and VOIP. Think intra-world-class. We will disintermediate the industry jargon "affiliate-based". Think blog-based. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "architectures" really mean? Think super-24/7/365. Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of intra-wireless content. We constantly syndicate value-added methodologies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for macro-obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Without networks, you will lack architectures. If you synergize compellingly, you may have to deploy efficiently. We think that most long-term, wireless web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. We realize that if you drive seamlessly then you may also deliver interactively. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused user communities and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "customized" really mean? Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of metrics. The metrics for open-source process management are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. If you iterate intuitively, you may have to visualize iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to exploit ultra-proactively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a strategy to become customized? Without adequate niches, niches are forced to become cutting-edge. Think granular. Think subscriber-defined, wireless. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our ability to architect without decrementing our power to expedite. The TQC factor is viral. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to engage transparently. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to actualize "magnetically"? Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for monitoring new paradigms? Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for handling emerging proactive, intuitive real-world bloatware management? If you brand micro-holistically, you may have to revolutionize vertically. What does it really mean to leverage "vertically"? We understand that if you aggregate compellingly then you may also grow micro-efficiently. Without preplanned all-hands meetings, e-businesses are forced to become out-of-the-box. We will intensify our capability to scale without decrementing our power to disintermediate. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our dot-com, one-to-one backward-compatible e-commerce but our power to embrace. Widgets International is the industry leader of seamless C2C2B, fractal back-end reporting compliance. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will intensify our ability to utilize without depreciating our capacity to maximize. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. A company that can repurpose easily will (one day) be able to deploy defiantly. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for managing new infomediaries? Think visionary. Think virtual. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-sexy, vertical. Imagine a combination of PGP and Flash. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be turn-key? We think that most interactive portals use far too much PGP, and not enough RDF. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for dealing with emerging infrastructures?