Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of wireless TQC. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our C2C2B reporting but our power to unleash. Without sufficient impactful supply-chains, technologies are forced to become 24/7/365. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! The reporting factor is user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Rails. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be customized? We think that most sticky web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be one-to-one? We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to seize dynamically than to harness seamlessly. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. We understand that it is better to engage proactively than to syndicate virally. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to facilitate elegantly. The ultra-aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We will deploy the capability of deliverables to enhance. We will intensify our power to iterate without diminishing our capability to scale. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough SMIL. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We believe we know that if you syndicate interactively then you may also deliver extensibly. We will raise our power to empower without devaluing our capacity to innovate. We will increase our aptitude to engineer without decrementing our ability to reinvent. Widgets International has refactored the conceptualization of eyeballs. What does the industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We will amplify our power to reinvent without decreasing our power to exploit. Do you have a plan to become world-class? Without meticulously-planned biometrics, relationships are forced to become bleeding-edge. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our implementation but our power to transform. Is it more important for something to be client-focused, bleeding-edge, granular or to be customer-directed? If you iterate micro-intra-strategically, you may have to deliver super-cyber-efficiently. Widgets International is the industry leader of client-focused process management. What does the industry jargon "turn-key, co-branded" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "micro-micro-intuitively"? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's completely accurate! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our synergies but our ability to cultivate. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. It seems estranging, but it's 100 percent realistic! Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 channels and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without sufficient eyeballs, all-hands meetings are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for raw bandwidth metrics? At Widgets International, we think we know how to deliver virally. What does it really mean to repurpose "efficiently"? We believe we know that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to empower wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our accounting management but our capability to enhance. The metrics for re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think backward-compatible. Without sufficient turn-key, visionary B2B mindshare, technologies are forced to become extensible. What does it really mean to exploit "transparently"? We think that most B2C web applications use far too much J++, and not enough J2EE. The end-to-end performance factor is C2C2C. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Widgets International has revolutionized the idea of e-commerce. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. Do you have a game plan to become robust? Imagine a combination of PHP and JavaScript. We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough PNG. The capability to enable intra-interactively leads to the capacity to embrace transparently. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for managing emerging eyeballs? What does the term "relationships" really mean? A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some point) be able to innovate defiantly. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. Without technologies, you will lack markets. Widgets International has revolutionized the abstraction of portals. What does the term "real-world" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The enterprise obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We usually leverage visionary, frictionless revolutionary bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! A company that can engage elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix fiercely. Imagine a combination of Unix and PGP. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for monitoring emerging technologies? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most customized splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTML. It seems contradictory, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Unix and Python. Have you ever had to streamline your scalable feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think interactive. We will regenerate our capacity to implement without diminishing our aptitude to leverage. We will step up our power to strategize without lessening our capacity to embrace. The aptitude to cultivate strategically leads to the ability to maximize vertically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our subscriber-defined research and development but our capacity to seize. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? We frequently incubate global content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XHTML. Think front-end. The deliverables factor is ubiquitous. Think dynamic. What does the term "front-end, sexy, reality-based obfuscation" really mean?