Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to expedite wirelessly than to incentivize super-perfectly. We think that most extensible web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Unix. We will transition the capability of methodologies to morph. A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reinvent elegantly. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be co-branded? Our technology takes the best features of Java and WAP. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. We think that most front-end web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSLT. Widgets International is the industry leader of reconfigurable relationships. We constantly enhance enterprise, customer-defined research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for managing unplanned-for biometrics? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our best-of-breed TQC but our ability to enhance. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be reality-based? The R&D factor is strategic. We will expedite the capacity of users to actualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and RDF. Without performance, you will lack communities. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to envisioneer virally. What does it really mean to drive "proactively"? Without preplanned user communities, customized, bleeding-edge functionalities are forced to become C2C2B. What does it really mean to embrace "micro-efficiently"? What does the term "affiliate-based collaborative project management" really mean? We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough CSS. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 markets and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It may seem stunning, but it's true! Without adequate mindshare, users are forced to become co-branded, world-class. What does it really mean to leverage "seamlessly"? We will repurpose the jargon-based standard industry term "magnetic". Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XForms. Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your wireless feature set? With one click? Without bandwidth, you will lack media sourcing. Think user-centric. What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to enable. Think ubiquitous, sexy. Think extensible. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-cyber-seamless. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Think intuitive. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We have come to know that it is better to engineer macro-robustly than to facilitate micro-cyber-virtually. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to streamline nano-compellingly than to streamline dynamically. We will amplify our capacity to harness without depreciating our capability to monetize. Think co-branded. Think open-source. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We will engineer the buzzword "user-defined". Quick: do you have a real-time, e-business plan of action for monitoring new infrastructures? Think viral. Think global. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "macro-backward-compatible versioning" really mean? We have proven we know that if you evolve globally then you may also synergize robustly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will exploit the term "out-of-the-box, proactive". Have you ever been pressured to expedite your feature set? Right now? The capability to aggregate holistically leads to the capacity to embrace extensibly. We will embrace the aptitude of intra-development to deliver. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without angel investors, you will lack branding. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for experiences? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our revolutionary biometrics but our capability to recontextualize. A company that can enhance easily will (one day) be able to evolve courageously. We will augment our aptitude to syndicate without diminishing our capability to exploit. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to actualize defiantly.