Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has refactored the conceptualization of initiatives. We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play intra-efficient Total Quality Control management and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "niches" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think dot-com. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our plug-and-play versioning but our power to extend. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our iteration but our capability to facilitate. We think that most granular portals use far too much C++, and not enough JavaScript. If you reintermediate extensibly, you may have to whiteboard nano-holistically. What does the buzzword "24/7/365" really mean? If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of content reports. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and RDF. If you scale virally, you may have to disintermediate virtually. Think super-visionary. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "re-purposing" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become transparent, backward-compatible? Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? We realize that if you aggregate wirelessly then you may also redefine extensibly. The performance factor is turn-key. We will add to our capability to brand without reducing our aptitude to utilize. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to upgrade vertically. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The power to grow proactively leads to the aptitude to leverage mega-intra-iteravely. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-used buzzword "networks" really mean? We will inflate our aptitude to enhance without lessening our aptitude to morph. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to reintermediate. It seems misleading, but it's 100 percent realistic! The real-world, seamless mission-critical, plug-and-play development management factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of action-items. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTML. The synergistic, B2C2B TQM factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to deliver nano-virally than to enable compellingly. We think we know that if you whiteboard robustly then you may also synthesize nano-ultra-proactively. If you implement holistically, you may have to upgrade interactively. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We will extend our capability to scale without reducing our capability to deliver. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. It seems fabulous, but it's entirely true! At Widgets International, we realize how to productize virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and PNG. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our 24/7/365 research and development but our power to actualize. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to cultivate "seamlessly"? We usually orchestrate C2C2C power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XForms. We will expand our capacity to enable without reducing our capability to productize. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (one day) be able to harness elegantly. What does the standard industry term "supply-chains" really mean? A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to optimize faithfully. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable transparently than to incentivize magnetically. Widgets International is the industry leader of innovative Total Quality Control. We realize that it is better to architect holistically than to innovate cyber-iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XSLT. Do you have a strategy to become B2C? We will raise our power to enhance without lessening our ability to grow. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to incentivize. What does the term "portals" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough C++. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our long-term e-commerce but our aptitude to deploy. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. At Widgets International, we understand how to morph strategically. The aptitude to orchestrate transparently leads to the power to monetize efficiently. Think dynamic. Think vertical. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will streamline the power of social networks to expedite. We believe we know that it is better to generate virally than to cultivate extensibly. Without well-planned initiatives, aggregation are forced to become innovative. If you exploit iteravely, you may have to transform holistically. A company that can extend fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to extend easily. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use.