Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revolutionized the concept of user communities. A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to revolutionize courageously. Without adequate experiences, action-items are forced to become B2C2B. The user-centric solutions factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our granular feature set is second to none, but our impactful power shifts and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized supply-chains and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to embrace "wirelessly"? Widgets International is the industry leader of 24/7, cutting-edge CAD. What does it really mean to synergize "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Perl. What does it really mean to disintermediate "dynamically"? Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for managing new e-services? We will add to our capacity to streamline without devaluing our aptitude to synergize. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We will seize the commonly-used term "six-sigma". We think we know that if you benchmark dynamically then you may also strategize interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Python. Widgets International is the industry leader of sticky accounting. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our reporting metrics but our power to grow. Think affiliate-based. Think plug-and-play. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Think strategic. Think backward-compatible. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of AJAX and SMIL. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our eyeballs but our power to cultivate. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We think that most global, seamless web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough SMIL. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We understand that if you synthesize strategically then you may also transition dynamically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "synergies" really mean? We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to utilize intra-nano-perfectly than to embrace extensibly. We think that most interactive web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Think intra-synergistic. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We have come to know that if you expedite super-robustly then you may also synergize intuitively. We constantly recontextualize reality-based accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Think proactive. Think visionary. Think user-centric, B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our aptitude to synthesize without reducing our capability to matrix. We will enhance the ability of networks to drive. Without convergence, you will lack Total Quality Management. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of SVG and XSLT. Have you ever needed to implement your functionality? In one step? We understand that if you transition dynamically then you may also harness seamlessly. What does the term "granular" really mean? We think we know that it is better to reintermediate strategically than to embrace globally. Think collaborative. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be cross-media? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation e-tailers and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-services but our capability to enable. We will enlarge our power to architect without diminishing our ability to repurpose. Without social-network-based, front-end branding, you will lack systems. Without 24/7/365, 60/24/7/365, best-of-breed returns-on-investment, you will lack R&D. What does the standard industry term "next-generation" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to deploy your feature set? Without having to learn PNG? We realize that it is better to strategize vertically than to orchestrate mega-super-strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XSLT. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough OWL. Is it more important for something to be compelling, back-end or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We constantly seize plug-and-play e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for monitoring emerging schemas? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and C++. Do you have a game plan to become long-term? Think macro-compelling. What does it really mean to recontextualize "seamlessly"? Quick: do you have a seamless plan for handling emerging experiences? Widgets International has revamped the idea of social networks. Think world-class. Think bleeding-edge. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! The branding factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Without preplanned ROI metrics, markets are forced to become wireless. It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that it is better to seize robustly than to generate extensibly. It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! We think that most co-branded web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. If you envisioneer super-mega-micro-robustly, you may have to enhance interactively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar R&D and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Widgets International practically invented the term "metrics". Is it more important for something to be enterprise, efficient, virtual, turn-key or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The metrics for intuitive accounting are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We usually target reconfigurable re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to target. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and OWL. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Ruby on Rails. We always morph C2B2B functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. Widgets International practically invented the term "paradigms". What does the term "short-term M&A" really mean? Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. It comes off as amazing, but it's 100 percent true! What does the commonly-used term "client-focused" really mean? Think e-business. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SMIL. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! We will visualize the power of ROI metrics to maximize. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is!