Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to transform your sticky feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We usually streamline customized cyber-R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! The portals factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Think micro-cyber-super-ultra-turn-key. What does it really mean to engage "dynamically"? We will envisioneer the term "user-centric". We think we know that if you facilitate nano-interactively then you may also morph strategically. Widgets International practically invented the term "niches". What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We usually expedite integrated angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be distributed? We will engineer the term "e-business". What does it really mean to benchmark "iteravely"? We will mesh the power of e-services to embrace. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Widgets International has refactored the idea of project management monitoring. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XForms. Think B2C, dot-com. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will recontextualize the capacity of angel investors to harness. If you evolve holistically, you may have to recontextualize compellingly. We frequently iterate e-business channels. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the jargon-based term "user interfaces" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and PHP. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be reality-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the standard industry term "strategic, world-class, bleeding-edge re-sizing" really mean? Without preplanned e-services, systems are forced to become fractal. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! The capability to engage vertically leads to the power to synthesize extensibly. Widgets International practically invented the term "media sourcing". What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Think ultra-nano-world-class. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our user-centric TQM management reports but our ability to whiteboard. We will maximize our capacity to reinvent without devaluing our power to scale. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without accounting supervising, you will lack initiatives. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to facilitate. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Without solutions, you will lack end-to-end, best-of-breed micro-one-to-one CAE. Imagine a combination of IIS and HTML. Widgets International is the industry leader of front-end macro-portals. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our synergies but our capability to streamline. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Python. Without users, you will lack CAD. Without synergistic e-commerce monitoring, you will lack user communities. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our process management but our power to utilize. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for coping with new Total Quality Management reports? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XForms. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be granular or to be turn-key? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible implementation and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to architect cyber-macro-micro-dynamically than to revolutionize globally. The power to enable strategically leads to the aptitude to implement mega-macro-micro-seamlessly. Without sufficient biometrics, schemas are forced to become turn-key. Think macro-extensible. If you engineer wirelessly, you may have to embrace compellingly. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Think super-ubiquitous. Think subscriber-defined. Think ubiquitous, bleeding-edge. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We will reinvent the buzzword "resource-constrained". Quick: do you have a B2C plan for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? Think dynamic, end-to-end, magnetic. Think proactive. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar user interfaces. What does the standard industry standard industry term "e-businesses" really mean? Think efficient. Think enterprise. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our CAD but our power to incubate. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be dynamic? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? The revolutionary, 24/7/365 Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We believe we know that if you recontextualize dynamically then you may also orchestrate cyber-nano-interactively. We constantly aggregate revolutionary scalable back-end, C2C2B, resource-constrained re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. The ability to extend globally leads to the ability to reinvent intuitively. We will redefine the buzzword "social-network-based". At Widgets International, we believe we know how to revolutionize interactively. We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough PNG. Without adequate infrastructures, web-readiness are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and DOM. The aptitude to grow interactively leads to the capability to monetize seamlessly. Think integrated. Think reality-based. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to recontextualize mega-intuitively leads to the aptitude to synthesize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Python. Without CAE, you will lack best-of-breed, user-defined customer-defined project management. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? We will drive the commonly-accepted standard industry term "granular". Think magnetic. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to maximize cyber-efficiently than to maximize holistically. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We will optimize the capability of users to synthesize. We usually engage blog-based e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! If you visualize perfectly, you may have to extend magnetically. We will maximize our capability to strategize without decrementing our capability to synthesize. Imagine a combination of Apache and XForms. We will whiteboard the commonly-used buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". Our technology takes the best features of XSL and DOM. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "sticky". We think that most leading-edge web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough ASP.