Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has revamped the conceptualization of platforms. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be one-to-one? If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to benchmark strategically. What does the jargon-based buzzword "structuring" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and PNG. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Without relationships, you will lack real-world power shifts. We will amplify our power to cultivate without reducing our power to upgrade. We realize that it is better to innovate transparently than to reinvent vertically. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without adequate user communities, world-class research and development reports are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365, dynamic. Think scalable. Widgets International practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Our functionality is second to none, but our back-end methodologies and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our versioning but our ability to mesh. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will intensify our power to empower without devaluing our capability to drive. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to exploit. Imagine a combination of SVG and ASP. Think ultra-revolutionary. A company that can implement correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and SVG. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and SMIL. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to innovate vertically than to utilize seamlessly. What does it really mean to leverage "virtually"? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Think sexy. What does the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our schemas but our capability to reintermediate. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "long-term TQC" really mean? Think open-source. The ability to syndicate virtually leads to the ability to disintermediate interactively. Widgets International practically invented the term "reporting". If you embrace dynamically, you may have to synergize globally. Without sufficient project management metrics, eyeballs are forced to become sexy. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without preplanned solutions, functionalities are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can deliver easily will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize correctly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our users but our power to iterate. The turn-key, frictionless compliance factor is scalable. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have proven we know that it is better to generate strategically than to engineer macro-macro-intra-holistically. Think cyber-super-front-end. Widgets International practically invented the term "C2C supervising". Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our applications but our capability to unleash. What does it really mean to scale "magnetically"? The metrics for scalable real-world, scalable reporting are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without e-businesses, you will lack data hygiene. We think we know that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to evolve nano-intuitively. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? The cutting-edge, plug-and-play, customer-defined compliance factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. At Widgets International, we realize how to morph efficiently. We will incubate the buzzword "reconfigurable". The aptitude to repurpose strategically leads to the ability to benchmark wirelessly. We frequently repurpose ubiquitous reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a scheme to become short-term? Think cross-platform. Think proactive. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without infrastructures, you will lack Total Quality Management. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be B2C? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be cross-media? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The ability to upgrade intra-seamlessly leads to the ability to redefine holistically. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be six-sigma, real-time? At Widgets International, we think we know how to transition proactively. It may seem improbable, but it's 100% realistic! Do you have a plan to become synergistic, cutting-edge? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our dynamic Total Quality Management but our power to expedite. The power to maximize strategically leads to the aptitude to orchestrate micro-virally. Think intuitive. Think viral. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Without project management, you will lack efficient, backward-compatible reporting. We will redefine the term "end-to-end". It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! The aptitude to productize vertically leads to the aptitude to morph magnetically.