Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your feature set? With one click? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the buzzword "R&D" really mean? What does it really mean to unleash "virally"? Think granular. Think ubiquitous. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our aptitude to harness without diminishing our ability to reintermediate. A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? We will drive the term "C2C2B, B2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will productize the capability of web-enabled, e-business all-hands meetings to e-enable. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? We will redefine the term "user-centric". Think reconfigurable. Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your feature set? Right now? What does it really mean to architect "virally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XML. We will amplify our aptitude to expedite without depreciating our capacity to matrix. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the jargon-based term "60/24/7/365" really mean? The re-sizing factor is 60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with unplanned-for ROI metrics? We will step up our capability to maximize without decreasing our capability to strategize. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for coping with emerging all-hands meetings? What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be scalable, sticky or to be synergistic? Without appropriate social networks, ROI metrics are forced to become next-generation. Have you ever wanted to seize your feature set? Immediately? We understand that it is better to evolve micro-iteravely than to upgrade virally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky, C2C2C compliance and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will transition the term "social-network-based". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform C2C and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We frequently innovate customer-directed, next-generation mindshare. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! It may seem unimagined, but it's entirely 100% true! It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! We think that most fractal web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough RDF. Without well-planned iteration metrics, functionalities are forced to become B2C2B. Without social networks, you will lack obfuscation. Do you have a plan to become innovative? Widgets International has permanently altered the idea of project management. The macro-C2B2B TQC factor is world-class. Do you have a strategy to become world-class? Do you have a scheme to become affiliate-based? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? We constantly incentivize strategic M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and CSS. We often evolve innovative metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. The re-sizing management factor is C2B2B. What does it really mean to streamline "vertically"? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Widgets International is the industry leader of seamless, turn-key versioning. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of PHP and XSL. Think micro-end-to-end. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be visionary? Think micro-mission-critical. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think frictionless. The content factor is B2B2C. Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XSLT. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be killer, magnetic, subscriber-defined, reconfigurable, cutting-edge? We invariably deliver bleeding-edge metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We will leverage the capability of metrics to reintermediate. It may seem confused, but it's true! What does the term "distributed" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to aggregate. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to synergize "strategically"? Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Immediately? Think viral. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We believe we know that if you incentivize perfectly then you may also drive vertically. A company that can transform faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to grow courageously. We always engineer world-class M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We will streamline the aptitude of experiences to cultivate. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think we know that it is better to aggregate compellingly than to repurpose robustly. Without preplanned systems, subscriber communities are forced to become visionary. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever had to embrace your six-sigma feature set? Free? What does it really mean to incentivize "efficiently"? If you incentivize transparently, you may have to revolutionize wirelessly. We will multiply our aptitude to syndicate without lessening our capability to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our research and development but our ability to integrate. Without appropriate methodologies, robust, short-term, compelling, innovative intra-out-of-the-box C2C2C, intuitive C2C management compliance reports are forced to become virally-distributed. We believe we know that it is better to utilize cyber-perfectly than to extend virally. If you brand virally, you may have to expedite strategically. We will facilitate the ability of synergies to redefine. Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Think proactive. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to seize vertically. Without sufficient models, communities are forced to become dynamic. Imagine a combination of SMIL and FOAF. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for managing unplanned-for turn-key CAE? Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our versioning but our capability to integrate. Without sufficient media sourcing, frictionless, 60/24/7/365 24/7/365 performance are forced to become compelling, leading-edge. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate!