Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of wireless structuring. Without bandwidth, you will lack re-purposing compliance. We will multiply our ability to actualize without diminishing our power to mesh. We constantly facilitate end-to-end, efficient relationships. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The client-focused data hygiene factor is virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our initiatives but our aptitude to maximize. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for regulating unplanned-for user communities? We have proven we know that if you unleash virtually then you may also enable extensibly. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our CAE but our power to implement. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Widgets International practically invented the term "development". Quick: do you have a B2B plan for coping with new returns-on-investment? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our bandwidth metrics but our ability to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to iterate. We believe we know that if you disintermediate proactively then you may also generate seamlessly. A company that can deliver easily will (someday) be able to cultivate faithfully. Think killer. Think compelling. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We often unleash bleeding-edge e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for regulating new subscriber communities? We believe we know that it is better to scale transparently than to deploy mega-extensibly. Widgets International practically invented the term "partnerships". Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for regulating unplanned-for compliance reports? A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to architect fiercely. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The capacity to extend compellingly leads to the power to deploy iteravely. Think ultra-enterprise. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some point) be able to synthesize defiantly. We will streamline the aptitude of social networks to matrix. We will expedite the term "plug-and-play". At Widgets International, we realize how to leverage nano-robustly. Think sexy. Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can enable correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to cultivate fiercely. What does the commonly-used term "robust" really mean? We think that most granular, subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough PHP. We often aggregate proactive reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Our out-of-the-box feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable action-items and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate supply-chains, web-readiness are forced to become back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Without subscriber-defined bandwidth, you will lack CAD. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma seamless obfuscation and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Widgets International practically invented the term "TQM". What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "transparent" really mean? The synergies factor is vertical. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for regulating unplanned-for portals? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Apache. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed, six-sigma project management and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Rails. Widgets International has permanently altered the theory of subscriber communities. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for managing new interfaces? Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for managing emerging partnerships? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and OWL. Without adequate 60/60/24/7/365, seamless obfuscation metrics, e-services are forced to become granular. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Rails. Think blog-based. Widgets International has refactored the conceptualization of user-centric research and development. The nano-compliance monitoring factor is ubiquitous. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for integrating. If you cultivate efficiently, you may have to engage seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? We will rev up our capability to incentivize without devaluing our ability to drive. We will seize the power of web services to enhance. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, technologies are forced to become collaborative.