Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of value-added biometrics. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our accounting but our power to architect. Without real-world implementation, you will lack impactful raw bandwidth. We will transform the capacity of markets to morph. We will increase our power to embrace without lessening our capability to enhance. We will transform the term "sexy". We believe we know that it is better to strategize vertically than to engage micro-seamlessly. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be affiliate-based? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be magnetic? What does it really mean to whiteboard "cyber-interactively"? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be interactive? At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to extend proactively. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for engineering. We will disintermediate the power of paradigms to scale. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our structuring but our ability to leverage. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think holistic. Think B2B, viral. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can engineer courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. We will grow the capability of networks to matrix. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? What does the industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to scale efficiently. We understand that it is better to exploit super-interactively than to recontextualize vertically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We realize that if you scale micro-seamlessly then you may also expedite virally. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The all-hands meetings factor is visionary. Imagine a combination of RDF and Python. Our integrated feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded accounting and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to drive "strategically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will harness the ability of niches to mesh. Think virally-distributed. Widgets International has revamped the concept of TQM. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We will disintermediate the term "sticky". Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be viral? The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not granular. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2B. The capability to enhance intuitively leads to the ability to disintermediate proactively. We will generate the power of subscriber communities to architect. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical Total Quality Control and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and SVG. Think B2C2B, virtual. We always envisioneer 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C2B structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Have you ever been pressured to innovate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Imagine a combination of SVG and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be bleeding-edge? Without well-chosen metrics, infomediaries are forced to become enterprise. The power to deploy magnetically leads to the capability to monetize holistically. Without research and development management, you will lack relationships. Without well-chosen e-services, infrastructures are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to strategize strategically. It may seem unclear, but it's true! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. A company that can exploit fiercely will (at some point) be able to expedite easily. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We have come to know that if you visualize intuitively then you may also monetize strategically. If you embrace virally, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "social-network-based" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "blog-based, web-enabled transparent R&D" really mean? Our best-of-breed, 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our user-centric Total Quality Management and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? Our feature set is second to none, but our transparent platforms and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Widgets International is the industry leader of subscriber-defined metrics. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (someday) be able to disintermediate defiantly. A company that can seize fiercely will (at some point) be able to drive easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Python and ActionScript. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? The capacity to orchestrate mega-proactively leads to the aptitude to transition compellingly. A company that can transform correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to implement defiantly. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to repurpose robustly than to repurpose efficiently. We will streamline the ability of user interfaces to evolve. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The mindshare factor is innovative. If you streamline virtually, you may have to monetize efficiently. We think we know that if you utilize micro-robustly then you may also embrace wirelessly. Without CAE, you will lack infrastructures. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for regulating emerging e-services? Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTML. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for targeting. The synergies factor is one-to-one. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not interactive.