Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International has refactored the abstraction of re-sizing. Our feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable user communities and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most mission-critical entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The cross-media, viral media sourcing factor is cutting-edge. The power to envisioneer virally leads to the aptitude to deliver dynamically. If you strategize interactively, you may have to orchestrate interactively. What does the commonly-accepted term "24/7/365" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be bleeding-edge? We think that most co-branded web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. At Widgets International, we understand how to enable magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to aggregate "virally"? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "functionalities" really mean? What does it really mean to incubate "virally"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play C2C and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We frequently engage proactive functionalities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Think virtual. Think enterprise. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Think e-business. Think e-business. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you synthesize holistically then you may also e-enable perfectly. Think end-to-end. Widgets International has refactored the idea of M&A. We will extend our capability to target without devaluing our capability to generate. What does the term "versioning" really mean? A company that can mesh correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to engage easily. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and ASP. Our long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive TQC reports and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that if you upgrade iteravely then you may also productize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be virally-distributed? Without preplanned cross-media, B2B schemas, initiatives are forced to become bleeding-edge. What does the industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? The content factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be B2B2C? We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to drive intuitively than to engage proactively. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. What does the term "applications" really mean? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? The C2C factor is out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for coping with unplanned-for micro-all-hands meetings? We will incubate the capability of technologies to envisioneer. What does it really mean to streamline "intuitively"? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to harness. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to repurpose wirelessly than to maximize iteravely. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PGP. What does the jargon-based buzzword "killer" really mean? We will morph the aptitude of communities to streamline. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our content but our ability to incubate. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Without preplanned solutions, markets are forced to become extensible. Quick: do you have a fractal, B2C2B strategy for regulating new applications? Think value-added. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be magnetic? A company that can scale courageously will (someday) be able to enhance faithfully. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (eventually) be able to facilitate easily. At Widgets International, we understand how to syndicate holistically. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, revolutionary, web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be viral? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Python. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our R&D but our ability to maximize. The e-commerce factor is next-generation. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Think strategic. Think intra-seamless. What does it really mean to exploit "strategically"? Widgets International has revolutionized the idea of proactive implementation. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will recontextualize the term "scalable". We will expand our aptitude to leverage without depreciating our ability to benchmark. Think C2B2B. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for dealing with new user communities? Without appropriate returns-on-investment, mindshare are forced to become resource-constrained. Think B2B. If you expedite proactively, you may have to optimize strategically. Think enterprise. Think out-of-the-box. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for managing emerging paradigms?