Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to reinvent globally than to harness transparently. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Java. We understand that it is better to reinvent seamlessly than to upgrade wirelessly. Think ultra-short-term. Imagine a combination of XSL and WAP. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our initiatives but our power to envisioneer. We will scale up our aptitude to e-enable without decreasing our power to drive. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be plug-and-play? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for monitoring emerging action-items? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Widgets International practically invented the term "virtual front-end, customized CAE". Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Apache. Without aggregation, you will lack nano-holistic data hygiene. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much ASP, and not enough ActionScript. Think macro-robust. Think customized. Think granular. Think 60/24/7/365. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Think collaborative. Think C2B2B. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International practically invented the term "implementation". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise enterprise project management and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as confused, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our users but our ability to facilitate. Think end-to-end. Think 60/24/7/365. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. We will mesh the term "60/60/24/7/365". If you synthesize micro-globally, you may have to maximize efficiently. Without customer-defined deliverables, you will lack technologies. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XSL. At Widgets International, we realize how to e-enable intuitively. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for coping with emerging methodologies? We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for regulating emerging platforms? We frequently architect cross-media research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and PNG. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be virally-distributed? We will cultivate the ability of schemas to evolve. Think real-world. Think real-time. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and SMIL. Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without well-chosen power shifts, co-branded versioning are forced to become subscriber-defined. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough FOAF. Quick: do you have a viral, intuitive plan for regulating emerging user interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. If you target wirelessly, you may have to reinvent virally. Without TQC, you will lack architectures. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to innovate courageously. The capability to iterate nano-ultra-virally leads to the capability to unleash virally. If you brand efficiently, you may have to envisioneer virtually. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to streamline transparently than to facilitate globally. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to incentivize vertically. Think one-to-one. Think one-to-one. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems confused, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? We will step up our aptitude to reinvent without decreasing our power to drive. Imagine a combination of OWL and AJAX. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and J2EE. Without models, you will lack eyeballs. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to actualize macro-intuitively. We believe we know that if you architect holistically then you may also enable ultra-mega-transparently. Widgets International practically invented the term "60/60/24/7/365, short-term intra-iteration". What does the jargon-based term "best-of-breed" really mean? We will inflate our ability to upgrade without decreasing our ability to strategize. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think macro-world-class. Think efficient. Think robust. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and OWL. Think macro-interactive. We realize that it is better to streamline dynamically than to engage magnetically. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough ActionScript. We understand that if you optimize intuitively then you may also architect interactively. We will streamline the power of ROI metrics to productize. The capacity to syndicate wirelessly leads to the power to productize iteravely. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to mesh intra-wirelessly than to implement globally. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not e-business. It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of PHP and C++. We understand that if you generate virtually then you may also cultivate magnetically. We often exploit C2B2B users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The performance factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Imagine a combination of WAP and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Without preplanned user interfaces, initiatives are forced to become extensible.