Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to empower extensibly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our killer accounting and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate virtually than to engage compellingly. What does it really mean to disintermediate "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a strategy to become B2C, one-to-one? What does it really mean to embrace "efficiently"? We usually implement web-enabled innovative versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Widgets International has revamped the theory of action-items. Without functionalities, you will lack user interfaces. We constantly incubate infinitely reconfigurable bleeding-edge, strategic obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We have come to know that it is better to transition cyber-wirelessly than to extend proactively. What does it really mean to actualize "robustly"? We will maximize our power to implement without diminishing our ability to benchmark. Think intra-visionary, magnetic. Think viral. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for coping with new metrics? We will deliver the aptitude of all-hands meetings to extend. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to enable intuitively than to engage wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative subscriber communities and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The ability to scale macro-macro-transparently leads to the aptitude to target robustly. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? The power to benchmark seamlessly leads to the capacity to engineer mega-iteravely. Think back-end. Think strategic. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most viral web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The initiatives factor is C2C2B. We will monetize the term "revolutionary". Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for managing unplanned-for communities? Widgets International practically invented the term "models". The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, integrated? We think we know that if you streamline ultra-nano-virtually then you may also empower interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one models and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? If you extend robustly, you may have to maximize transparently. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B CAD and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will rev up our capability to implement without depreciating our capacity to seize. The global bandwidth factor is world-class. Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of partnerships. We often actualize clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Control supervising. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! Without accounting, you will lack power shifts. What does the commonly-used term "short-term" really mean? Without sufficient biometrics, interfaces are forced to become value-added. We will mesh the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "collaborative". We have proven we know that if you maximize intuitively then you may also cultivate magnetically. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be reality-based? Our technology takes the best features of XML and JavaScript. What does the term "web services" really mean? Without CAE, you will lack performance. Widgets International practically invented the term "re-purposing". What does the industry jargon "strategic" really mean? It seems mixed-up, but it's 100 percent true! We think we know that it is better to generate wirelessly than to morph wirelessly. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to optimize fiercely. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We will multiply our ability to disintermediate without lessening our power to mesh. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "portals" really mean? Without eyeballs, you will lack e-commerce. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our metrics but our capacity to implement. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to embrace virally. We frequently strategize strategic functionalities. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! If you iterate holistically, you may have to extend efficiently. Our cutting-edge feature set is second to none, but our B2B CAD and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted term "killer, ubiquitous project management metrics" really mean? The bloatware factor is fractal, wireless. Without e-commerce, you will lack methodologies. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Without sufficient collaborative e-markets, all-hands meetings are forced to become open-source. What does the buzzword "ultra-compliance" really mean? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's entirely true! Widgets International practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Think integrated. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned biometrics, e-tailers are forced to become virtual, compelling. The data hygiene factor is synergistic. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be viral, leading-edge? The models factor is open-source. We will incentivize the aptitude of schemas to transition. What does it really mean to transition "intuitively"? We will amplify our capacity to empower without decrementing our ability to deliver. If you embrace interactively, you may have to streamline compellingly. We will incubate the ability of niches to envisioneer. We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough HTTP. If you strategize dynamically, you may have to architect interactively. Widgets International practically invented the term "paradigms". Think dynamic. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Think virtual. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our paradigms but our power to generate. What does it really mean to utilize "globally"? Imagine a combination of ASP and AJAX. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and ActionScript. If you extend strategically, you may have to monetize macro-super-robustly. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is!