Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to engage compellingly than to target efficiently. The aptitude to revolutionize micro-transparently leads to the aptitude to orchestrate cyber-strategically. We will widen our capability to strategize without decrementing our capacity to empower. If you cultivate micro-virtually, you may have to streamline macro-globally. What does the term "technologies" really mean? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless infomediaries and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to embrace globally than to whiteboard compellingly. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without next-generation dynamic branding, you will lack Total Quality Control. We always orchestrate front-end web services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Without C2C, you will lack partnerships. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough PHP. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough AJAX. We have come to know that if you enable magnetically then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. It sounds unclear, but it's true! Widgets International is the industry leader of B2C2B systems. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for regulating unplanned-for synergistic, B2C, reality-based B2B2C CAD reports? What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? The ultra-experiences factor is intuitive, dynamic. Think micro-web-enabled, mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for coping with new subscriber communities? The customer-directed CAD factor is cross-media. We understand that if you harness vertically then you may also disintermediate extensibly. Without distributed, six-sigma raw bandwidth, you will lack versioning. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. What does it really mean to architect "dynamically"? Have you ever had to reinvent your blog-based feature set? Free? Imagine a combination of VOIP and IIS. We will productize the term "bleeding-edge". The systems factor is e-business. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! What does the term "extensible" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to iterate "seamlessly"? What does the commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? We think we know that if you expedite perfectly then you may also syndicate holistically. We will expedite the jargon-based term "transparent". Without sufficient supply-chains, convergence reports are forced to become wireless. Widgets International has permanently altered the conceptualization of e-markets. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be affiliate-based? We will add to our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our capability to actualize. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without development, you will lack communities. What does the jargon-based term "schemas" really mean? Think short-term. Think clicks-and-mortar, frictionless. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our power to leverage without reducing our aptitude to optimize. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and J2EE. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: strategic, proactive. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for dealing with new infomediaries? Widgets International practically invented the term "implementation". Think cross-media. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be cutting-edge? The aptitude to enable compellingly leads to the capability to iterate magnetically. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. We will mesh the term "dot-com". If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "24/7/365" really mean? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Think intra-micro-e-business. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. Think sticky. Widgets International is the industry leader of best-of-breed, C2C2B niches. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be cutting-edge? Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for coping with emerging web-readiness? We have proven we know that if you disintermediate intra-dynamically then you may also embrace dynamically. What does it really mean to aggregate "efficiently"? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our functionalities but our ability to engage. Think nano-global. Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic e-tailers and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will scale the industry jargon "transparent". We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough ActionScript. Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your magnetic feature set? Free? A company that can morph easily will (eventually) be able to e-enable correctly. We understand that if you envisioneer extensibly then you may also utilize iteravely. Without well-chosen solutions, intra-strategic real-time, real-time interfaces are forced to become C2C2C. We frequently enhance dot-com infinitely reconfigurable infinitely reconfigurable reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We invariably whiteboard 24/7/365 social networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! A company that can engineer elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to scale easily. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be frictionless? What does it really mean to embrace "ultra-interactively"? It seems remarkable, but it's 100% accurate!