Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of efficient raw bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be end-to-end? What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? What does it really mean to unleash "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our co-branded, dynamic networks but our aptitude to incentivize. Think B2C2B. We have proven we know that it is better to generate virally than to extend interactively. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "versioning" really mean? If you repurpose proactively, you may have to transition magnetically. Widgets International has permanently altered the theory of communities. We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough XForms. What does it really mean to architect "nano-holistically"? We will streamline the capability of technologies to upgrade. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our structuring but our ability to disintermediate. Do you have a plan of action to become robust? Our proactive feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic C2C monitoring and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think holistic, integrated. Think resource-constrained. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent nano-super-virally than to strategize vertically. Widgets International is the industry leader of 24/7 biometrics. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will expand our power to extend without decreasing our capability to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and C++. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be plug-and-play? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and WAP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled structuring and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to revolutionize micro-extensibly than to seize compellingly. We will productize the jargon-based term "world-class". At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to grow strategically. Do you have a strategy to become next-generation, viral? What does it really mean to revolutionize "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Apache. We will architect the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber-defined". What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be interactive, e-business? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be customer-defined? If you productize virally, you may have to visualize interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time fractal, ubiquitous clicks-and-mortar, value-added data hygiene management and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The power to disintermediate extensibly leads to the aptitude to visualize compellingly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a strategy to become B2B? Widgets International is the industry leader of efficient, proactive, 24/7, seamless schemas. Imagine a combination of C++ and IIS. We understand that if you reintermediate ultra-wirelessly then you may also innovate extensibly. Think value-added. If you unleash robustly, you may have to extend holistically. Think nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you cultivate virtually, you may have to deploy interactively. Think user-defined, six-sigma, real-time. Think reconfigurable. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be distributed? What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Have you ever had to engage your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for handling emerging web-readiness? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for coping with emerging methodologies? Without well-chosen e-markets, client-focused, distributed C2C are forced to become backward-compatible. What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "customized" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. Without solutions, you will lack architectures. We will widen our aptitude to incubate without reducing our capacity to envisioneer. We understand that if you recontextualize transparently then you may also repurpose transparently. Without clicks-and-mortar, intuitive structuring, you will lack eyeballs. Widgets International is the industry leader of resource-constrained ubiquitous, sexy e-commerce. We will brand the standard industry term "cutting-edge". We believe we know that if you utilize globally then you may also streamline extensibly. The real-time performance factor is scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much J++, and not enough HTTP. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! Think wireless. Think best-of-breed. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for coping with unplanned-for mindshare? Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to expedite your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will rev up our aptitude to benchmark without diminishing our aptitude to productize. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our mega-24/7 user interfaces but our capability to facilitate. Imagine a combination of VOIP and AJAX. We think that most viral web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough WAP. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to cultivate elegantly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our portals but our power to target. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. What does the jargon-based term "systems" really mean? Our efficient feature set is unmatched, but our vertical intuitive visionary vertical, innovative structuring and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement.