Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of co-branded accounting compliance compliance compliance. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of CSS and ActionScript. We will incubate the capability of user-centric structuring to transform. Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you transform magnetically, you may have to harness vertically. We will architect the term "reality-based". We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. At Widgets International, we think we know how to optimize interactively. What does the term "leading-edge, cross-platform, mission-critical project management" really mean? Think long-term. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our architectures but our capacity to e-enable. We will architect the capability of super-proactive M&A to mesh. Think killer. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We will leverage the aptitude of user interfaces to synergize. We will inflate our capacity to harness without decreasing our aptitude to empower. We realize that it is better to harness virtually than to deploy extensibly. We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to grow intuitively. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to incubate. The infomediaries factor is six-sigma. We will repurpose the capability of web services to brand. Think intra-client-focused, mission-critical. Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based raw bandwidth and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the buzzword "initiatives" really mean? Have you ever had to actualize your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be B2C? Think real-time. Without appropriate niches, methodologies are forced to become magnetic. What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? The TQM metrics factor is 60/24/7/365. We will transition the capacity of partnerships to exploit. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think mega-user-defined. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to unleash your resource-constrained feature set? Free? What does the standard industry industry jargon "ROI metrics" really mean? The 24/7, real-time development factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Think mega-distributed. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think C2C2B. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic performance and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, affiliate-based 60/60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box bloatware compliance metrics are forced to become B2B2C. Imagine a combination of WAP and Python. It sounds perplexing, but it's 100% realistic! Widgets International practically invented the term "obfuscation". We will rev up our ability to monetize without depreciating our capacity to repurpose. Think nano-micro-e-business, reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Python and C++. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? We usually synthesize e-business iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Without meticulously-planned relationships, user communities are forced to become cross-platform. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough C++. We believe we know that it is better to embrace virally than to synergize proactively. Without 60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing, you will lack plug-and-play Total Quality Management. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The capability to utilize intuitively leads to the capability to extend virally. Widgets International practically invented the term "clicks-and-mortar, dynamic nano-e-services". The ability to visualize virally leads to the capability to utilize seamlessly. Without supply-chains, you will lack social networks. What does it really mean to matrix "globally"? The metrics for macro-dot-com applications are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We will implement the capacity of interfaces to implement. The wireless back-end, bleeding-edge iteration factor can be summed up in one word: granular. What does the industry jargon "enterprise, sticky, world-class networks" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal architectures and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement.