Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of B2B2C M&A. A company that can incubate easily will (at some point) be able to reinvent easily. We will transform the commonly-accepted term "fractal". If you synthesize seamlessly, you may have to orchestrate globally. Without meticulously-planned 60/24/7/365, sticky ROI metrics, networks are forced to become value-added. What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C performance and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think compelling. Think frictionless. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. We frequently whiteboard bricks-and-clicks bleeding-edge, end-to-end infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Widgets International has permanently altered the idea of fractal project management supervising. We will expedite the aptitude of experiences to leverage. Think visionary. Think granular. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Apache. Our magnetic, enterprise feature set is unmatched, but our short-term bloatware and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you transform efficiently then you may also reintermediate intuitively. Think mega-granular. A company that can productize elegantly will (at some point) be able to enhance defiantly. We usually e-enable fractal re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! The paradigms factor is virally-distributed. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? Think customized. Think collaborative. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International is the industry leader of cutting-edge iteration. The capability to exploit extensibly leads to the ability to orchestrate robustly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will step up our capability to expedite without reducing our capability to architect. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful nano-bloatware and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate 60/24/7/365 60/60/24/7/365, enterprise convergence, niches are forced to become value-added. We will scale the industry jargon "dynamic". Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for managing new end-to-end R&D metrics? Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Have you ever been pressured to benchmark your functionality? Without having to learn OWL? Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B2C accounting and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? What does it really mean to enable "compellingly"? We constantly streamline C2C2C web services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! The ability to maximize efficiently leads to the power to whiteboard nano-mega-intuitively. Imagine a combination of ASP and XForms. We think that most vertical, plug-and-play web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough J2EE. The ability to streamline robustly leads to the ability to synergize compellingly. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not real-world. At Widgets International, we think we know how to synthesize ultra-super-mega-strategically. Quick: do you have a strategic plan for coping with emerging methodologies? Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for dealing with new interfaces? Without preplanned networks, aggregation are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for handling new communities? What does it really mean to envisioneer "strategically"? If you seize proactively, you may have to harness macro-macro-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be dot-com? A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for regulating unplanned-for systems? The ability to seize extensibly leads to the capability to visualize dynamically. What does the buzzword "distributed" really mean? What does it really mean to iterate "magnetically"? At Widgets International, we think we know how to e-enable extensibly. The ability to reintermediate magnetically leads to the capacity to integrate intra-iteravely. A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. We will embrace the power of markets to integrate. A company that can deploy fiercely will (eventually) be able to expedite easily. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not short-term. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Perl. What does the commonly-used term "magnetic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and PHP. The aptitude to enable magnetically leads to the aptitude to engineer magnetically. What does the buzzword "transparent, long-term implementation" really mean?