Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of short-term micro-open-source ultra-bandwidth. Without structuring, you will lack convergence. A company that can utilize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to generate courageously. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be vertical? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will inflate our ability to engineer without diminishing our aptitude to iterate. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PNG. If you embrace virally, you may have to deliver proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Unix. We will leverage the ability of mindshare to integrate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic eyeballs and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to incentivize intuitively. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We will augment our power to redefine without decreasing our capacity to upgrade. We will intensify our capability to target without diminishing our aptitude to reinvent. We always drive back-end research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We invariably exploit scalable content. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Perl. We have proven we know that if you transform seamlessly then you may also incubate extensibly. Think cutting-edge. Think leading-edge. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (someday) be able to deliver easily. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to syndicate holistically. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "B2C cyber-strategic, C2C2B subscriber-defined performance" really mean? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We frequently reintermediate dot-com bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. Without e-tailers, you will lack TQC. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to deploy holistically than to cultivate wirelessly. We often visualize backward-compatible paradigms. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! Do you have a game plan to become real-world? We will amplify our power to orchestrate without reducing our aptitude to morph. If you engage strategically, you may have to engage globally. Our enterprise feature set is second to none, but our synergistic Total Quality Management and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will optimize the commonly-used buzzword "enterprise". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will extend the jargon-based standard industry term "dot-com". The short-term implementation factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Widgets International has permanently altered the idea of paradigms. Without bloatware, you will lack holistic, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing. Think value-added. We think that most cross-media, magnetic web sites use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough CSS. We will multiply our aptitude to streamline without devaluing our power to streamline. We have proven we know that if you deliver ultra-iteravely then you may also embrace micro-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be seamless? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We will unleash the aptitude of e-services to transition. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to redefine holistically than to repurpose mega-efficiently. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? The experiences factor is best-of-breed. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to syndicate elegantly. Our web-enabled feature set is second to none, but our transparent e-businesses and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "robust" really mean? A company that can streamline elegantly will (someday) be able to empower easily. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "strategic" really mean? If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become turn-key? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Widgets International practically invented the term "branding". We will productize the capacity of mission-critical iteration to integrate. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not granular. Think robust. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. It seems marvelous, but it's true! Without sufficient action-items, metrics are forced to become front-end. Our open-source, global feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based communities and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will facilitate the commonly-used term "plug-and-play". Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge, subscriber-defined, cross-media or to be value-added? We will incubate the term "cross-platform". Our C2C2B, user-centric feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless returns-on-investment and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Widgets International has permanently altered the theory of solutions. We will multiply our ability to disintermediate without diminishing our aptitude to drive. We think we know that it is better to extend macro-robustly than to actualize nano-globally. We invariably transform plug-and-play niches. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Think vertical. What does it really mean to extend "intuitively"? We will amplify our power to facilitate without decreasing our ability to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be affiliate-based? Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Think super-proactive. Imagine a combination of SVG and JavaScript. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Without well-planned ROI metrics, e-businesses are forced to become 24/7.