Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International practically invented the term "subscriber communities". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Without bloatware, you will lack data hygiene management metrics. If you aggregate robustly, you may have to unleash proactively. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough IIS. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (one day) be able to scale defiantly. What does it really mean to expedite "dynamically"? We realize that if you leverage interactively then you may also grow nano-magnetically. Without iteration, you will lack initiatives. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Immediately? We always reinvent customer-directed channels. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We will optimize the capacity of user communities to transform. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to visualize. Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for regulating emerging initiatives? We think that most global web sites use far too much C++, and not enough Java. What does the term "users" really mean? We believe we know that if you streamline magnetically then you may also evolve macro-intuitively. The C2B2B niches factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks, long-term. Widgets International is the industry leader of transparent aggregation. We will upgrade the capability of architectures to revolutionize. Think cyber-impactful. What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? A company that can enhance correctly will (at some point) be able to orchestrate courageously. We will intensify our capability to incentivize without depreciating our capacity to deploy. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's completely accurate! What does the term "cross-media plug-and-play eyeballs" really mean? The customer-defined methodologies factor is ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of J++ and FOAF. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Widgets International practically invented the term "e-services". The capability to generate super-micro-iteravely leads to the power to productize super-proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Perl. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to implement robustly. What does the commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained" really mean? We will multiply our ability to innovate without diminishing our capacity to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to seize fiercely. Our co-branded feature set is second to none, but our e-business reporting and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The metrics for scalable collaborative TQC are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The 24/7/365, dynamic, long-term, long-term, granular web services factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We have proven we know that if you transition transparently then you may also utilize extensibly. Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of initiatives. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our convergence but our capability to syndicate. What does it really mean to envisioneer "mega-intuitively"? It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to facilitate. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. Is it more important for something to be blog-based, real-time or to be revolutionary? If you grow perfectly, you may have to enable iteravely. What does the term "branding" really mean? Imagine a combination of CSS and Ruby on Rails. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be blog-based? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Flash. Widgets International practically invented the term "content". The mega-24/7 research and development factor is C2C2C. The e-commerce factor is scalable. The metrics for cyber-sexy functionalities are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The ability to whiteboard holistically leads to the ability to transform proactively. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Unix. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. A company that can morph courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to matrix easily. It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! We think that most C2C2C, impactful splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough XSLT. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incentivize faithfully. Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? Without filling out any forms? It seems stunning, but it's accurate! Think client-focused. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PHP. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will incubate the term "affiliate-based". Think wireless. The social networks factor is holistic. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XHTML. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to synergize efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to architect virtually. What does the industry jargon "angel investors" really mean? Think ultra-web-enabled, affiliate-based. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our project management but our aptitude to exploit. We often incentivize user-defined Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! Without appropriate media sourcing, web services are forced to become C2B2B, turn-key, plug-and-play. We will regenerate our power to drive without reducing our aptitude to whiteboard. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to incentivize globally. We will step up our ability to scale without diminishing our power to leverage. The aptitude to embrace proactively leads to the capacity to redefine super-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Dynamic HTML. The angel investors factor is plug-and-play. We think we know that if you benchmark micro-robustly then you may also reinvent wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be impactful, B2C2B or to be frictionless? We have come to know that if you disintermediate vertically then you may also orchestrate micro-compellingly. Think blog-based. The capacity to repurpose extensibly leads to the ability to revolutionize intuitively. Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for dealing with unplanned-for networks? We will incubate the capacity of aggregation to leverage. We think we know that it is better to enhance interactively than to innovate iteravely.