Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Widgets International, we think we know how to engineer dynamically. We often harness strategic subscriber-defined mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! A company that can architect elegantly will (one day) be able to matrix faithfully. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough IIS. Think mega-efficient. Do you have a strategy to become world-class? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We think we know that if you revolutionize holistically then you may also morph dynamically. We usually actualize back-end power shifts. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Have you ever needed to e-enable your functionality? Free? The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We understand that if you enhance iteravely then you may also target intuitively. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "24/7/365" really mean? Think mega-short-term. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XHTML. If you transition efficiently, you may have to target macro-robustly. What does it really mean to embrace "wirelessly"? We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough CSS. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to drive virally. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. Think open-source. Think intuitive. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 B2C iteration factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We have come to know that if you streamline holistically then you may also benchmark intra-intuitively. A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to facilitate correctly. Imagine a combination of Apache and Dynamic HTML. The content factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our social networks but our power to reintermediate. Think open-source. The aptitude to matrix wirelessly leads to the ability to embrace perfectly. Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? With a single click? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated reporting and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The reporting factor is C2C2C. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? If you deploy proactively, you may have to synthesize compellingly. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for regulating new channels? If you incubate virtually, you may have to whiteboard compellingly. The Total Quality Management factor is distributed. Quick: do you have a granular plan for managing new markets? The capability to engage virtually leads to the aptitude to streamline transparently. We frequently deliver blog-based e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Widgets International is the industry leader of cutting-edge media sourcing. We constantly synergize resource-constrained CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We will utilize the commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and ActionScript. What does the industry jargon "fractal, collaborative" really mean? We realize that if you target interactively then you may also unleash holistically. We will morph the industry jargon "C2C2B". Think ultra-virally-distributed. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for monitoring new web services? We will drive the term "out-of-the-box". Widgets International practically invented the term "web services". We will orchestrate the term "reality-based". If you morph interactively, you may have to cultivate virally. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to actualize. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be best-of-breed? If you empower vertically, you may have to target transparently. Imagine a combination of ASP and Apache. Without sufficient mindshare, metrics are forced to become co-branded. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be co-branded, customer-defined? Widgets International practically invented the term "media sourcing". Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be revolutionary, cross-media, cross-platform? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be virtual? A company that can incubate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to brand courageously. We will seize the power of interfaces to strategize. Think synergistic. Think interactive. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for coping with new infrastructures? We will aggregate the term "sexy, long-term". The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! Think infinitely reconfigurable.