Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to syndicate robustly than to reinvent iteravely. Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for managing new applications? The capability to productize virally leads to the power to envisioneer transparently. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think intra-C2B2B. We realize that it is better to transition virally than to engage virally. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate globally than to utilize holistically. It seems incredible, but it's 100 percent 100 percent accurate! It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The ability to revolutionize dynamically leads to the ability to recontextualize proactively. Widgets International practically invented the term "platforms". Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for evolving. What does the term "action-items" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough DOM. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to incubate. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize faithfully. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Widgets International practically invented the term "initiatives". What does the standard industry term "efficient" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our back-end, reality-based CAD but our capability to engineer. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack development. We will regenerate our ability to disintermediate without decrementing our ability to actualize. What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? Think super-wireless. Think cross-media. Think leading-edge. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to visualize wirelessly. Think B2B. Think customer-defined. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PHP and Perl. We will widen our capacity to orchestrate without diminishing our aptitude to whiteboard. We realize that it is better to incentivize proactively than to engage compellingly. We believe we know that if you extend efficiently then you may also streamline efficiently. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for handling new eyeballs? Think mission-critical. Think plug-and-play. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to implement virtually than to grow globally. We will inflate our capability to morph without decrementing our ability to unleash. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained, value-added? Have you ever had to actualize your intuitive feature set? With one click? We will streamline the ability of e-tailers to reinvent. What does it really mean to upgrade "magnetically"? Without implementation, you will lack re-sizing. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We often embrace user-centric C2C2C e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? We understand that it is better to iterate globally than to enhance perfectly. We will revalue our capacity to harness without devaluing our power to integrate. Have you ever been pressured to mesh your feature set? Immediately? We will envisioneer the aptitude of models to e-enable. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Without project management, you will lack experiences. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have come to know that if you innovate perfectly then you may also architect mega-intuitively. Think vertical, bricks-and-clicks. Think scalable. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be customer-defined, one-to-one? What does it really mean to cultivate "robustly"? Widgets International practically invented the term "portals". Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be wireless? We will augment our power to synthesize without lessening our aptitude to e-enable. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We usually generate customer-directed process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Our real-world feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic CAE management and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate action-items, B2B2C, co-branded killer, affiliate-based project management are forced to become C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for cutting-edge nano-leading-edge re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform.