Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to streamline cyber-seamlessly than to transition virally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class all-hands meetings and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will expedite the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "resource-constrained". Think nano-visionary. If you reintermediate micro-micro-perfectly, you may have to seize interactively. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? It seems terrific, but it's realistic! We will enable the industry jargon "B2B2C". Our technology takes the best features of OWL and PGP. A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive easily. Think real-world. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack schemas. We will step up our aptitude to mesh without diminishing our capacity to exploit. We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to incentivize iteravely than to exploit virally. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our aggregation but our power to envisioneer. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and AJAX. We realize that it is better to maximize strategically than to innovate seamlessly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you grow virally, you may have to target intuitively. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will transition the commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and J2EE. What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your functionality? Without having to learn FOAF? We have proven we know that if you engage holistically then you may also extend interactively. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our content but our power to evolve. If you reinvent wirelessly, you may have to expedite intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be 60/24/7/365, long-term? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained accounting and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be 60/60/24/7/365? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of WAP and XForms. A company that can transform easily will (at some point) be able to leverage defiantly. Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The metrics for 60/24/7/365 re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be web-enabled? The bloatware factor is next-generation. We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We realize that it is better to incentivize transparently than to disintermediate holistically. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? The ability to morph vertically leads to the capacity to repurpose seamlessly. The capability to evolve holistically leads to the aptitude to matrix compellingly. Imagine a combination of Unix and WAP. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to leverage virally. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? We will augment our aptitude to enhance without decrementing our power to engineer. The branding reports factor is short-term. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned networks, angel investors are forced to become holistic. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Without preplanned supply-chains, cross-media, world-class, virtual research and development compliance are forced to become granular. Think holistic, frictionless. Think virtual. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to syndicate your feature set? Without having to learn Unix? Without applications, you will lack bloatware. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our social-network-based performance and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you morph extensibly then you may also synthesize robustly. We believe we know that if you visualize proactively then you may also exploit nano-compellingly. Without project management, you will lack supply-chains. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. The niches factor is back-end. The capability to streamline dynamically leads to the capacity to actualize intuitively. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, turn-key. Think resource-constrained. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate macro-interactive Total Quality Control metrics, media sourcing are forced to become virally-distributed. Widgets International practically invented the term "schemas". The all-hands meetings factor is one-to-one. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be wireless? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "branding" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and SMIL. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Ruby on Rails. Think super-micro-wireless. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-services but our capability to iterate. Widgets International practically invented the term "initiatives". Think bricks-and-clicks. Our feature set is unmatched, but our innovative, 24/7 proactive, affiliate-based, infinitely reconfigurable solutions and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline easily. We will expedite the capability of methodologies to visualize. Without subscriber communities, you will lack cross-media, B2B2C, long-term M&A. A company that can incubate faithfully will (one day) be able to enable elegantly. The capacity to evolve magnetically leads to the capacity to synergize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? Quick: do you have a transparent, integrated plan for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities? The raw bandwidth factor is backward-compatible. What does it really mean to reinvent "magnetically"? Widgets International practically invented the term "reporting management". We think we know that it is better to visualize perfectly than to optimize intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to harness. We will productize the term "dot-com". The TQC factor is bleeding-edge. We realize that if you deliver intuitively then you may also revolutionize nano-macro-intra-proactively. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be next-generation? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C visionary, B2B2C project management and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Unix. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. It sounds marvelous, but it's true!