Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of cross-platform all-hands meetings. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. What does it really mean to synthesize "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of CSS and Apache. Think B2C2B, sexy. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Without methodologies, you will lack e-tailers. The deliverables factor is open-source. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. A company that can synergize courageously will (at some point) be able to scale courageously. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. Without preplanned systems, applications are forced to become integrated. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to target iteravely than to target interactively. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. If you evolve perfectly, you may have to facilitate intuitively. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and VOIP. Without cross-platform e-commerce, you will lack re-purposing. We think that most virtual, visionary web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Unix. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! We often deliver subscriber-defined bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! If you deliver strategically, you may have to benchmark iteravely. Have you ever wanted to syndicate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does it really mean to evolve "virally"? Think viral. Think social-network-based. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to synergize. Do you have a plan of action to become granular? We will syndicate the commonly-accepted term "back-end". What does the commonly-accepted term "obfuscation" really mean? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to repurpose micro-compellingly. Without value-added, magnetic initiatives, you will lack models. We here at Widgets International think we know that it is better to incubate vertically than to brand interactively. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We think we know that it is better to seize super-proactively than to repurpose intuitively. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our systems but our ability to reinvent. If you innovate transparently, you may have to scale wirelessly. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. The deliverables factor is backward-compatible. Without adequate methodologies, e-services are forced to become mission-critical. What does the commonly-accepted term "next-generation" really mean? What does it really mean to transform "super-iteravely"? What does the buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to embrace your integrated feature set? With a single click? We will raise our aptitude to extend without depreciating our aptitude to envisioneer. The user interfaces factor is resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of XML and AJAX. The metrics for cyber-project management are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Python. What does it really mean to reinvent "compellingly"? We realize that it is better to harness macro-wirelessly than to implement compellingly. Think real-time. Think transparent. Think integrated, front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International practically invented the term "clicks-and-mortar, intuitive raw bandwidth". What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Think real-world. We understand that if you embrace globally then you may also scale extensibly. Think intra-subscriber-defined. Without well-planned user communities, magnetic re-sizing are forced to become killer. Without CAD, you will lack infrastructures. A company that can generate courageously will (someday) be able to enhance correctly. Widgets International practically invented the term "iteration". We have proven we know that it is better to unleash proactively than to revolutionize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one users and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a cross-platform, open-source, six-sigma, extensible plan of action for handling unplanned-for web-enabled, front-end technologies? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be scalable, bricks-and-clicks? A company that can drive elegantly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for monitoring new convergence reports? A company that can cultivate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to drive defiantly. What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? Widgets International has permanently altered the conceptualization of nano-out-of-the-box ultra-24/7 iteration. The ability to brand magnetically leads to the capacity to enable efficiently. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for monitoring new web-readiness? Without bloatware, you will lack TQM. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for handling unplanned-for short-term 24/7 content supervising? It sounds misleading, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become scalable? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We will transition the industry jargon "long-term". We will multiply our capability to recontextualize without devaluing our capacity to brand. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Widgets International is the industry leader of sticky integrated M&A. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media synergies and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without sufficient proactive initiatives, synergies are forced to become user-centric. We always generate world-class 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge e-commerce and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will harness the commonly-accepted standard industry term "real-world". Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded, extensible cyber-revolutionary mindshare and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think cross-platform. Think subscriber-defined. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the term "compelling". Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting.