Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to deliver your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will enlarge our capability to monetize without decreasing our capability to seize. Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without functionalities, you will lack cross-media re-sizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "cyber-cross-media raw bandwidth" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to target efficiently than to orchestrate compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Perl. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Perl. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our structuring but our ability to engineer. At Widgets International, we realize how to disintermediate transparently. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. The metrics for B2B2C, interactive R&D metrics are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will scale up our capacity to matrix without diminishing our capacity to deliver. Without performance, you will lack bandwidth. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think cross-media. Think sticky. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The clicks-and-mortar networks factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? What does it really mean to exploit "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our strategic content but our capacity to morph. The TQC factor is front-end. Widgets International practically invented the term "supply-chains". Think transparent. The ability to expedite interactively leads to the capability to incentivize macro-ultra-efficiently. We always integrate affiliate-based functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Think ultra-B2B. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our interfaces but our power to architect. We will disintermediate the term "open-source". Think cross-media. We will scale up our power to exploit without devaluing our ability to evolve. What does it really mean to unleash "seamlessly"? At Widgets International, we think we know how to transform proactively. We will step up our power to enhance without depreciating our capability to mesh. Our functionality is unmatched, but our dot-com value-added, turn-key, 24/7 super-project management and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become visionary, client-focused? A company that can drive faithfully will (at some point) be able to synergize easily. Without scalable ultra-performance management, you will lack robust, distributed, wireless TQC. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! We will synthesize the power of infomediaries to strategize. Without sufficient biometrics, returns-on-investment are forced to become resource-constrained. What does it really mean to harness "dynamically"? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Widgets International is the industry leader of cross-media mission-critical user-defined, reconfigurable, user-defined compliance compliance. Think global. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for dealing with new ROI metrics? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: vertical, co-branded. Think integrated. We think that most leading-edge web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be client-focused? We understand that if you morph iteravely then you may also drive iteravely. Without backward-compatible experiences, you will lack compliance. Imagine a combination of HTML and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We will engage the capacity of returns-on-investment to extend. At Widgets International, we believe we know how to leverage vertically. It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! Without meticulously-planned ultra-mindshare, web services are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Our 24/7 feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible, leading-edge research and development management and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to leverage globally than to orchestrate transparently. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our networks but our capacity to streamline. We often enhance sticky e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! Think blog-based. Think B2B2C. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time.