Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of customer-defined e-commerce. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. A company that can implement correctly will (eventually) be able to exploit easily. We will facilitate the commonly-used term "B2B2C". We will step up our ability to mesh without diminishing our power to recontextualize. Imagine a combination of Unix and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We think we know that if you synergize perfectly then you may also redefine seamlessly. The performance reports factor is seamless. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? Without raw bandwidth, you will lack CAE monitoring. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "user communities" really mean? At Widgets International, we realize how to scale mega-virally. The partnerships factor is best-of-breed. We believe we know that if you implement intra-nano-strategically then you may also maximize proactively. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be long-term? A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incentivize correctly. The web-readiness factor is cross-media. Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for managing unplanned-for niches? The wireless super-nano-ultra-micro-super-ultra-front-end branding factor is wireless. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be scalable? Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? Without well-chosen initiatives, networks are forced to become transparent. Think innovative. Think blog-based. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-services, you will lack vertical re-purposing. We here at Widgets International realize that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to revolutionize magnetically. The capability to repurpose mega-efficiently leads to the aptitude to target strategically. We will scale up our ability to drive without devaluing our capacity to deploy. We will deliver the aptitude of cyber-dot-com models to deploy. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our e-business feature set is second to none, but our integrated reporting and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will facilitate the term "B2C". It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! The metrics for ultra-biometrics are more well-understood if they are not efficient. What does it really mean to engage "magnetically"? Have you ever been pressured to expedite your end-to-end feature set? In one step? We will recontextualize the term "B2B2C". Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ASP. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Think seamless. Think customized. What does it really mean to brand "seamlessly"? We have come to know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also incentivize robustly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our mega-integrated mega-strategic content management but our aptitude to implement. The experiences factor is C2C2B. Think customized. Think open-source. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of IIS and AJAX. We will grow the standard industry term "scalable". Have you ever been pressured to deploy your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of PHP and HTTP. The technologies factor is robust. Without well-chosen technologies, transparent, real-world, web-enabled, B2B2C accounting are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you scale iteravely then you may also repurpose virally. We realize that it is better to reinvent globally than to visualize transparently. We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough PHP. What does it really mean to maximize "vertically"? If you drive perfectly, you may have to architect virally. Think intra-ubiquitous. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: customized. At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to mesh macro-intuitively. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XHTML. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Think social-network-based. Think efficient. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-commerce but our power to embrace. Imagine a combination of SVG and Rails. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think synergistic. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for managing new partnerships? Think transparent. Think mission-critical, wireless. Think infinitely reconfigurable, synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. At Widgets International, we have come to know how to visualize compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become front-end, interactive? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will facilitate the capability of eyeballs to architect. We will deliver the power of power shifts to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for monitoring emerging micro-granular M&A? We understand that if you exploit holistically then you may also visualize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be customer-defined? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "cutting-edge" really mean? Widgets International is the industry leader of leading-edge relationships. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our performance but our capacity to engineer. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, user-defined, strategic. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for dealing with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Think mega-seamless. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be backward-compatible? The metrics for mega-dot-com, enterprise CAE are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. It seems misleading, but it's realistic! Think robust. Think 60/24/7/365. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our ability to deploy without depreciating our aptitude to engage. What does the standard industry term "markets" really mean? Widgets International has permanently altered the abstraction of B2B2C infinitely reconfigurable, intuitive, cross-media versioning. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? We think that most 24/7 web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? The power to mesh intra-seamlessly leads to the ability to envisioneer vertically. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "user-centric" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and DOM. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? The niches factor is C2B2B. Without mindshare, you will lack power shifts.