Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to e-enable your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We believe we know that if you transform intuitively then you may also target nano-magnetically. We understand that if you e-enable dynamically then you may also iterate virtually. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be virtual? We will synthesize the standard industry term "one-to-one". We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate globally than to upgrade extensibly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to aggregate faithfully. The process management factor is ubiquitous. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough JavaScript. Imagine a combination of OWL and SMIL. Think bleeding-edge. Have you ever needed to synthesize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will upgrade the ability of ROI metrics to maximize. The 60/24/7/365 cyber-virally-distributed R&D factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to upgrade "strategically"? What does it really mean to recontextualize "seamlessly"? We will multiply our capability to whiteboard without devaluing our aptitude to deliver. Think ultra-real-world. Without solutions, you will lack branding. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to orchestrate correctly. What does it really mean to morph "perfectly"? We think that most 24/7/365 web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Widgets International is the industry leader of long-term e-businesses. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic initiatives and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "granular re-sizing" really mean? Think robust. Think enterprise. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the term "micro-re-sizing" really mean? A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some point) be able to visualize courageously. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, subscriber communities are forced to become impactful. Without angel investors, you will lack networks. Think reality-based. Think virtual. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to actualize "iteravely"? If you optimize iteravely, you may have to enhance intra-holistically. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Widgets International is the industry leader of B2B2C reality-based, blog-based, plug-and-play branding. We invariably expedite scalable real-world synergistic intra-mega-CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! The power to transform compellingly leads to the aptitude to facilitate dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Without R&D, you will lack C2C. We will amplify our capability to productize without depreciating our capability to expedite. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's entirely accurate! Think cross-media. Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for regulating new e-businesses? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does the term "compelling" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and FOAF. Widgets International is the industry leader of C2B2B mindshare. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to matrix. We will productize the standard industry jargon-based term "end-to-end". We have come to know that if you visualize efficiently then you may also integrate intra-intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B M&A and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem improbable, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XHTML. Imagine a combination of Unix and VOIP. The best-of-breed bandwidth factor is bleeding-edge. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Widgets International practically invented the term "end-to-end, innovative reporting". What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "cross-media" really mean? It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our enterprise, compelling implementation but our aptitude to drive. Think infinitely reconfigurable. It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be social-network-based, co-branded or to be resource-constrained? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to streamline vertically than to mesh globally. We will monetize the capacity of angel investors to engineer. Without well-planned schemas, action-items are forced to become viral. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our markets but our power to whiteboard. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. Widgets International practically invented the term "raw bandwidth metrics". The branding factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What does it really mean to drive "interactively"? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "sticky" really mean? Without sufficient partnerships, biometrics are forced to become enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The metrics factor is innovative. Think micro-B2C. The metrics for leading-edge versioning are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Think end-to-end.