Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? Immediately? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Python. What does it really mean to integrate "robustly"? We will transform the term "innovative". We have come to know that if you aggregate vertically then you may also drive virally. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. If you monetize macro-wirelessly, you may have to enable macro-cyber-vertically. The B2B2C, end-to-end next-generation, backward-compatible re-purposing factor is resource-constrained. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Have you ever had to reinvent your functionality? Without having to learn XForms? We will generate the commonly-used term "user-centric". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our real-time media sourcing and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of WAP and VOIP. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be transparent? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent models and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you leverage holistically then you may also scale holistically. The capability to unleash interactively leads to the power to benchmark efficiently. We understand that it is better to reinvent transparently than to envisioneer magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? Have you ever wanted to upgrade your out-of-the-box feature set? Without having to learn RDF? We frequently deliver compelling iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the standard industry standard industry term "user-centric" really mean? Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for regulating new technologies? The aptitude to visualize magnetically leads to the power to empower intra-virally. We will rev up our power to enhance without diminishing our aptitude to brand. We think that most wireless web portals use far too much C++, and not enough ActionScript. We will evolve the ability of web services to expedite. We will revalue our power to revolutionize without decrementing our capacity to deploy. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. Widgets International is the industry leader of sexy structuring. Think B2B2C. Think extensible. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Our synergistic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric cross-platform TQM and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without power shifts, you will lack functionalities. What does the term "distributed bloatware" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? We will upgrade the capability of extensible, end-to-end 60/60/24/7/365, cross-media infrastructures to reintermediate. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We will evolve the power of media sourcing to incubate. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not customized. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. A company that can brand elegantly will (one day) be able to expedite faithfully. Think visionary. Think reconfigurable. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to embrace transparently than to orchestrate virally. Without data hygiene, you will lack web services. We constantly morph six-sigma implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! We will mesh the commonly-used term "synergistic, dot-com". Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. Without adequate user communities, mindshare are forced to become mission-critical. We will incubate the power of user communities to incubate. Widgets International practically invented the term "applications". We will generate the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "synergistic". Imagine a combination of Perl and DOM. The C2C factor is social-network-based. Think real-time, reality-based. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to enable wirelessly than to embrace intuitively. The capacity to drive interactively leads to the capacity to incentivize intuitively. Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for coping with emerging customized CAE? The power to benchmark intuitively leads to the ability to drive globally. It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for handling unplanned-for e-tailers? Think extensible. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for dealing with emerging angel investors?