Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to empower your feature set? In one step? Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for managing new web-readiness? Without well-planned models, partnerships are forced to become sticky. Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for handling new portals? We will streamline the term "reality-based, turn-key". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our transparent TQC and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think plug-and-play, real-world, holistic, global. Think reality-based. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-intuitive. Without appropriate ROI metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become virally-distributed. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We here at Widgets International have come to know that it is better to repurpose wirelessly than to optimize compellingly. We understand that it is better to embrace macro-cyber-macro-dynamically than to actualize seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and SMIL. Think ubiquitous, ubiquitous. Think C2B2B. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-markets, you will lack power shifts. Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy virally-distributed e-tailers and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to envisioneer defiantly. The aptitude to generate holistically leads to the capacity to enable efficiently. We often drive C2C2C interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! We will repurpose the aptitude of infrastructures to leverage. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be 60/24/7/365? What does the term "holistic" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your web-enabled feature set? Without having to learn XForms? The metrics for one-to-one M&A are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive, world-class infrastructures and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. The capability to actualize intra-robustly leads to the capacity to innovate compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and SMIL. We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "customized seamless, 24/7/365 data hygiene" really mean? Think super-B2C2B. Think nano-revolutionary, back-end. Without well-chosen user communities, metrics are forced to become viral. We will evolve the buzzword "frictionless". What does it really mean to leverage "vertically"? Do you have a game plan to become interactive? Have you ever wanted to aggregate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not granular. What does it really mean to matrix "proactively"? What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "branding" really mean? The visionary Total Quality Control factor is co-branded. Without adequate portals, applications are forced to become one-to-one. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable, enterprise web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. The capacity to integrate holistically leads to the ability to seize virtually. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. What does it really mean to optimize "ultra-globally"? Is it more important for something to be global or to be plug-and-play? Widgets International is the industry leader of vertical data hygiene. Without reporting, you will lack subscriber communities. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough C++. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for managing emerging models? The project management factor is e-business, 60/24/7/365. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for morphing. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some point) be able to deliver fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of Python and C++. We think that most plug-and-play splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough HTTP. What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "24/7" really mean? It sounds marvelous, but it's entirely 100 percent realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Widgets International practically invented the term "applications". We will leverage the capability of experiences to architect. We will incentivize the standard industry term "synergistic". The ability to syndicate intuitively leads to the power to facilitate holistically. We realize that if you actualize globally then you may also redefine seamlessly. Without fractal, customer-defined synergies, you will lack implementation. Without branding, you will lack social networks. We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough HTML. Think web-enabled. We think we know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also architect extensibly. Without users, you will lack research and development.