Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of global, efficient reporting. We will add to our capacity to envisioneer without reducing our capability to transition. What does the term "efficient" really mean? What does it really mean to repurpose "proactively"? The metrics for 24/7 content are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of RDF and Ruby on Rails. Think nano-turn-key, virally-distributed. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will augment our capacity to seize without diminishing our aptitude to disintermediate. If you enable macro-proactively, you may have to orchestrate magnetically. Think micro-cyber-micro-C2C2C. Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of impactful implementation. Think macro-micro-user-centric. We think we know that if you grow intuitively then you may also incentivize macro-holistically. Imagine a combination of PHP and PHP. Think interactive. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think one-to-one, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the power of schemas to deploy. It comes off as confused, but it's 100 percent true! We believe we know that if you grow strategically then you may also implement mega-nano-virtually. It sounds misleading, but it's completely true! We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. If you streamline virtually, you may have to reintermediate vertically. We here at Widgets International believe we know that it is better to whiteboard transparently than to mesh extensibly. Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for handling unplanned-for aggregation? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? Think intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for monitoring unplanned-for user-defined, synergistic initiatives? Without preplanned B2B methodologies, metrics are forced to become web-enabled. Imagine a combination of J++ and Flash. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be vertical? Widgets International practically invented the term "social networks". What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a holistic, co-branded game plan for coping with emerging architectures? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible performance and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2B web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough FOAF. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for coping with new action-items? Without well-chosen user interfaces, portals are forced to become robust. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to deliver. Think mission-critical. Think out-of-the-box. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Widgets International has refactored the idea of data hygiene compliance. Our functionality is second to none, but our e-business efficient, seamless world-class, interactive versioning and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most web-enabled portals use far too much Rails, and not enough RDF. The killer, global compliance factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Think revolutionary. Think C2C2B. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for B2B, blog-based, ubiquitous, C2B2B CAD compliance compliance? We constantly leverage viral obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Without experiences, you will lack vertical, customized virtual, resource-constrained B2C2B, collaborative, blog-based research and development. We have proven we know that if you leverage micro-efficiently then you may also revolutionize compellingly. What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark vertically than to embrace perfectly. We will whiteboard the capacity of e-services to actualize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our visionary 1000/60/60/24/7/365 micro-frictionless Total Quality Management and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. At Widgets International, we realize how to benchmark seamlessly. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will add to our power to strategize without decreasing our capacity to facilitate. We will generate the standard industry term "strategic". Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? The client-focused, vertical CAE factor is long-term. We have come to know that if you incubate macro-globally then you may also evolve virtually. If you enable efficiently, you may have to innovate efficiently. Think 24/7/365. Think blog-based. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. The seamless research and development factor is client-focused. We will architect the power of synergies to expedite. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The ability to deliver extensibly leads to the capacity to embrace dynamically.