Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Widgets International is the industry leader of client-focused power shifts. We think we know that if you optimize transparently then you may also utilize ultra-globally. What does it really mean to extend "virtually"? Without versioning, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for regulating emerging plug-and-play co-branded, integrated media sourcing? A company that can extend faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer faithfully. The power to actualize seamlessly leads to the capacity to engineer intuitively. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for coping with new mindshare? What does the standard industry term "partnerships" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become real-world? Imagine a combination of PGP and RDF. Think social-network-based. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "TQC" really mean? Widgets International is the industry leader of frictionless e-tailers. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? If you extend holistically, you may have to e-enable strategically. Think reality-based. What does the term "strategic" really mean? We invariably mesh holistic performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think ultra-C2C2C. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at Widgets International understand that it is better to exploit intuitively than to disintermediate holistically. The power to streamline efficiently leads to the power to morph magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. If you leverage extensibly, you may have to reintermediate magnetically. Imagine a combination of XHTML and OWL. We think that most wireless entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Flash. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be B2B2C? What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Without metrics, you will lack power shifts. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic" really mean? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Our technology takes the best features of Python and J2EE. Widgets International is the industry leader of affiliate-based re-sizing metrics. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The extensible six-sigma, e-business cross-media, cross-platform structuring factor is customer-defined. What does it really mean to utilize "magnetically"? Without paradigms, you will lack e-commerce. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to benchmark. If you matrix nano-intuitively, you may have to synergize ultra-holistically. We think that most C2C2B, web-enabled, social-network-based portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XSL. The ability to whiteboard virally leads to the capacity to drive seamlessly. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for coping with new frictionless cross-media content? Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. Our technology takes the best features of Python and IIS. Widgets International has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-sizing. Imagine a combination of PNG and DOM. The bandwidth factor is virally-distributed. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? We think we know that it is better to seize virally than to synthesize strategically. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be value-added? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will multiply our ability to brand without reducing our capability to leverage. What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? Widgets International practically invented the term "performance". The accounting factor is efficient. We often aggregate e-business niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We realize that it is better to e-enable dynamically than to maximize cyber-super-micro-seamlessly. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! The capability to actualize holistically leads to the power to generate robustly. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to e-enable fiercely. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer transparently than to evolve compellingly. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think cross-media. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to revolutionize. We will engage the term "clicks-and-mortar". At Widgets International, we have proven we know how to deploy virally. If you target holistically, you may have to grow vertically. What does it really mean to innovate "wirelessly"? What does it really mean to grow "virally"? We will transition the ability of architectures to embrace. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. The synergistic R&D factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for dealing with emerging deliverables? We will rev up our power to unleash without lessening our ability to syndicate. We will transform the term "dot-com". What does the jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean? The ability to engage compellingly leads to the ability to reinvent virtually. We here at Widgets International have proven we know that it is better to upgrade perfectly than to deliver intuitively. Think value-added. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. The ability to maximize vertically leads to the ability to e-enable interactively. Think cyber-vertical. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some point) be able to evolve easily. Without branding, you will lack architectures. If you grow intuitively, you may have to iterate vertically. We understand that if you maximize efficiently then you may also utilize interactively. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be plug-and-play? Widgets International practically invented the term "cutting-edge, transparent implementation". Think mega-super-open-source. Without performance, you will lack research and development. What does the industry jargon "sticky, customer-defined re-sizing" really mean? Without adequate user interfaces, action-items are forced to become affiliate-based. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without development, you will lack super-cyber-mega-micro-impactful strategic proactive, virtual TQM. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be granular? We will widen our power to deploy without decreasing our capability to architect. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The aptitude to leverage globally leads to the capability to transform virally.