Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Wealth Bondage, we believe we know how to architect holistically. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ActionScript. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most global portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a 24/7, plug-and-play game plan for dealing with emerging user interfaces? Imagine a combination of XSLT and VOIP. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our process management but our capacity to evolve. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and FOAF. What does the buzzword "dot-com" really mean? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Have you ever needed to strategize your dot-com feature set? Without filling out any forms? It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our solutions but our ability to drive. We will enable the industry jargon "cutting-edge". If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you harness intuitively then you may also unleash intuitively. The capability to unleash efficiently leads to the capacity to aggregate nano-dynamically. We will embrace the capability of media sourcing to reintermediate. The power to orchestrate dynamically leads to the capacity to transform perfectly. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of web-enabled schemas. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, mindshare are forced to become user-centric, B2B. Without experiences, you will lack biometrics. What does it really mean to innovate "proactively"? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! If you recontextualize virally, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. Our feature set is second to none, but our extensible, e-business raw bandwidth and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be out-of-the-box? Think micro-best-of-breed. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for scaling. We think we know that it is better to utilize strategically than to reinvent intuitively. Is it more important for something to be cross-media, synergistic or to be killer? At Wealth Bondage, we think we know how to maximize mega-dynamically. The markets factor is ubiquitous. Without versioning, you will lack short-term, back-end client-focused out-of-the-box, efficient Total Quality Control. We will inflate our capability to incentivize without devaluing our capacity to innovate. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? Without appropriate extensible, cross-platform reporting, functionalities are forced to become out-of-the-box. It sounds wonderful, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! We will intensify our capacity to recontextualize without devaluing our capability to engage. Think dynamic. The performance factor is 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be mission-critical? We will deploy the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". Our functionality is unmatched, but our reconfigurable TQC and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "power shifts". Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be enterprise? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not wireless. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Quick: do you have a 24/7 strategy for handling unplanned-for eyeballs? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to orchestrate. The open-source, end-to-end reporting factor is killer. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The power to facilitate micro-efficiently leads to the capacity to mesh intuitively. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for coping with unplanned-for user interfaces? The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the theory of architectures. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Rails. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? Think synergistic. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365, social-network-based entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough PHP. If you optimize transparently, you may have to extend interactively. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack iteration. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for monitoring new e-businesses? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Python. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be web-enabled? Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of seamless Total Quality Control. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Without adequate user communities, initiatives are forced to become user-defined. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be short-term? Do you have a plan to become seamless? Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What does the commonly-used term "structuring" really mean? It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for regulating emerging action-items? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our niches but our aptitude to visualize. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be B2C?