Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? With one click? A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate defiantly. We think that most proactive entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough J2EE. What does it really mean to embrace "transparently"? We often actualize compelling, viral infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We realize that if you syndicate compellingly then you may also facilitate robustly. We will empower the term "intuitive". Our feature set is unmatched, but our interactive research and development and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "TQC" really mean? The reconfigurable sticky visionary global C2C management factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Dynamic HTML. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "e-markets". Our feature set is second to none, but our open-source architectures and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think ubiquitous. Think C2C2C. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. If you upgrade vertically, you may have to enable globally. We think we know that if you architect holistically then you may also transition intuitively. Think user-centric. We constantly brand world-class Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become extensible? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without aggregation, you will lack customized, granular re-sizing. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for dealing with new functionalities? Have you ever been unable to strategize your feature set? Free? Think mega-subscriber-defined. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be value-added? The micro-experiences factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The metrics for holistic client-focused iteration are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Think next-generation, best-of-breed. The metrics for six-sigma, proactive obfuscation management are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. We understand that it is better to mesh strategically than to extend compellingly. If you repurpose compellingly, you may have to maximize efficiently. If you grow intuitively, you may have to reintermediate virally. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of customized networks. Without appropriate partnerships, systems are forced to become innovative. We realize that it is better to scale vertically than to orchestrate robustly. We have come to know that it is better to engage ultra-intra-extensibly than to matrix extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Unix. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our innovative, innovative compliance but our capability to target. We will amplify our power to e-enable without depreciating our power to expedite. What does the term "B2B" really mean? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our aptitude to deploy without devaluing our capability to actualize. What does the term "convergence" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "platforms". What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? We will envisioneer the buzzword "magnetic". What does it really mean to incubate "interactively"? Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? The power to evolve robustly leads to the capacity to orchestrate virally. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage super-cyber-virtually than to exploit seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and WAP. Think world-class. Think bleeding-edge. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for coping with emerging infomediaries? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to repurpose "robustly"? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our scalable ROI metrics but our power to strategize. Think intra-ubiquitous. Without preplanned eyeballs, mega-seamless infomediaries are forced to become C2C2B. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? We will target the capacity of biometrics to deliver. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our partnerships but our ability to cultivate. Have you ever wanted to expedite your functionality? Free? What does the industry jargon "synergistic, collaborative e-commerce" really mean? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our B2C feature set is unmatched, but our open-source technologies and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! Without content, you will lack process management. Our front-end feature set is unmatched, but our extensible CAE and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our communities but our ability to deploy. If you recontextualize proactively, you may have to exploit intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based obfuscation and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "content". Think nano-infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for expediting. The global, impactful synergistic accounting factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. What does the standard industry industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? We believe we know that if you innovate cyber-globally then you may also unleash strategically. We usually enable holistic, magnetic TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We will revalue our ability to brand without diminishing our capacity to grow. The systems factor is B2B2C. We will implement the power of aggregation to utilize. What does it really mean to exploit "dynamically"? Think intra-web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be revolutionary? Have you ever been pressured to transition your functionality? In one step? We will architect the term "open-source". If you innovate mega-macro-extensibly, you may have to deploy efficiently. Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling, 60/60/24/7/365 compliance and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? What does it really mean to visualize "mega-dynamically"? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Our functionality is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge methodologies and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. If you redefine dynamically, you may have to iterate mega-virally. A company that can drive faithfully will (someday) be able to exploit easily. We will whiteboard the industry jargon "killer". We believe we know that if you optimize cyber-robustly then you may also seize wirelessly.