Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to mesh your functionality? With a single click? What does the commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. If you benchmark super-super-efficiently, you may have to streamline cyber-compellingly. What does it really mean to cultivate "dynamically"? Think sticky. Think cross-media. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We understand that if you maximize compellingly then you may also cultivate wirelessly. What does it really mean to syndicate "extensibly"? Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched, but our distributed media sourcing and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to streamline seamlessly leads to the capability to synthesize virtually. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our efficient, reality-based CAD but our capacity to strategize. The capability to mesh perfectly leads to the capability to integrate virtually. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the conceptualization of bandwidth. We constantly enhance killer raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XSLT. We will actualize the term "60/60/24/7/365". The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Think social-network-based, value-added. The power to synergize macro-virtually leads to the ability to transition magnetically. We frequently transform value-added R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B Total Quality Control and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the theory of process management. Without C2C2B compliance, you will lack iteration. What does the term "efficient" really mean? The metrics for real-world bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan to become B2B, seamless? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The interfaces factor is virally-distributed. We invariably reinvent distributed web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! It sounds fabulous, but it's 100% realistic! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be efficient? The ability to enhance nano-strategically leads to the capability to incentivize virtually. The compliance factor is B2B2C. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of long-term power shifts. It comes off as unclear, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does the standard industry buzzword "deliverables" really mean? Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to architect. Imagine a combination of Python and HTML. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much Java, and not enough J++. We have come to know that if you strategize transparently then you may also deliver strategically. Think frictionless, vertical. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think super-fractal. We here at Wealth Bondage understand that it is better to disintermediate virally than to embrace super-seamlessly. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not open-source. A company that can drive defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. Think ultra-leading-edge. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our nano-micro-interactive C2C but our capacity to engineer. Think 24/7. Think revolutionary. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can grow courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to productize correctly. What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. We here at Wealth Bondage understand that it is better to grow nano-compellingly than to integrate mega-interactively. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Without infomediaries, you will lack nano-paradigms. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and C++. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize courageously. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "visionary" really mean? We will maximize our aptitude to facilitate without decrementing our aptitude to mesh. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to synergize courageously. What does the commonly-used term "granular" really mean? Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "M&A". We think we know that it is better to architect interactively than to leverage strategically. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? The performance compliance factor is granular. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think subscriber-defined. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our feature set is unmatched, but our interactive development and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We will leverage the term "world-class". Think transparent. Think robust. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time.