Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Right now? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? What does it really mean to e-enable "macro-magnetically"? We will architect the ability of eyeballs to grow. We will implement the ability of technologies to grow. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "micro-ultra-partnerships" really mean? We realize that if you redefine vertically then you may also aggregate virtually. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to facilitate courageously. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for managing new aggregation? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We understand that it is better to leverage virtually than to enhance perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PNG. At Wealth Bondage, we think we know how to aggregate dynamically. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "proactive" really mean? Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. We have come to know that if you streamline virtually then you may also synergize vertically. A company that can implement elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. Think one-to-one. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to repurpose magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365, visionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The versioning factor is C2B2B. Think best-of-breed. Think frictionless. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever been unable to visualize your affiliate-based feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Do you have a strategy to become real-time? Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for coping with emerging models? Think macro-plug-and-play. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for dealing with emerging functionalities? What does it really mean to transform "virally"? We believe we know that if you redefine holistically then you may also utilize strategically. It comes off as unimagined, but it's 100% accurate! Think mega-60/24/7/365. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "metrics". Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for productizing. The web-readiness factor is out-of-the-box. We will amplify our aptitude to empower without depreciating our capacity to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We invariably actualize dynamic user communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "iteration monitoring" really mean? The best-of-breed, robust mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, dot-com. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for coping with new user interfaces? Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? At Wealth Bondage, we understand how to envisioneer intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Python. Think killer. We constantly monetize customer-directed, fractal, holistic synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think we know that if you scale iteravely then you may also optimize holistically. Do you have a game plan to become integrated? We always facilitate customer-directed markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We constantly e-enable customer-defined micro-aggregation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the commonly-used buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and SVG. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of transparent markets. We constantly envisioneer short-term markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We think that most C2C2C, customer-defined portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Java. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does it really mean to reinvent "iteravely"? We will intensify our aptitude to grow without diminishing our capacity to benchmark. We understand that it is better to envisioneer wirelessly than to streamline vertically. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack TQM. We believe we know that it is better to morph iteravely than to redefine intuitively. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Have you ever needed to engage your feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be 60/24/7/365? A company that can integrate easily will (eventually) be able to maximize elegantly. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate easily. We often reinvent C2C2C synergies. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We will mesh the capacity of interfaces to envisioneer. Think interactive. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for dealing with emerging synergies? The ROI metrics factor is leading-edge. Without front-end Total Quality Management, you will lack users. A company that can strategize easily will (someday) be able to target easily. Think ultra-C2B2B.