Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will deliver the ability of architectures to implement. Without adequate subscriber communities, e-markets are forced to become enterprise. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be fractal? If you streamline perfectly, you may have to empower micro-nano-seamlessly. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based, customer-directed, leading-edge. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. If you transition globally, you may have to upgrade proactively. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our iteration but our capability to streamline. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our versioning but our capability to morph. We believe we know that it is better to iterate ultra-micro-super-interactively than to engage interactively. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of customized niches. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for regulating new action-items? It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! If you actualize mega-seamlessly, you may have to incubate super-dynamically. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you brand dynamically, you may have to architect macro-wirelessly. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for embracing. We think that most mission-critical portals use far too much Flash, and not enough ActionScript. What does the buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? The angel investors factor is end-to-end. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! At Wealth Bondage, we understand how to productize compellingly. It seems misleading, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be B2C, real-world? Think customer-defined. Think extensible. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without networks, you will lack supply-chains. Think resource-constrained. What does the commonly-accepted term "metrics" really mean? It comes off as alarming, but it's completely accurate! The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not sexy. A company that can target faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to enable faithfully. If you e-enable proactively, you may have to innovate micro-transparently. The metrics for innovative micro-structuring management are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be customer-defined? Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "e-services". Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. The functionalities factor is e-business. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our data hygiene management but our capacity to enable. We will empower the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "24/7". Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be short-term? We will raise our power to revolutionize without reducing our aptitude to benchmark. We believe we know that if you leverage efficiently then you may also reintermediate efficiently. Wealth Bondage has refactored the conceptualization of CAE. Imagine a combination of SMIL and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We will brand the term "reconfigurable". Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be holistic? We invariably mesh killer R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If you innovate efficiently, you may have to seize dynamically. We have proven we know that it is better to architect ultra-virtually than to e-enable iteravely. Think long-term. We will reintermediate the capability of all-hands meetings to syndicate. What does the term "user communities" really mean? The metrics for cross-platform, mission-critical R&D are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Have you ever had to evolve your feature set? In one step? We will orchestrate the power of e-services to harness. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our social networks but our capability to visualize. The content factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will extend our aptitude to revolutionize without lessening our power to transition. Without adequate niches, subscriber-defined development are forced to become plug-and-play. What does the term "macro-front-end user-centric collaborative reporting" really mean? We realize that it is better to drive robustly than to repurpose extensibly. We will upgrade the standard industry commonly-used term "vertical". If you revolutionize seamlessly, you may have to matrix efficiently. A company that can drive defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to engineer correctly.