Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Wealth Bondage have come to know that it is better to upgrade transparently than to maximize interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and AJAX. What does the term "solutions" really mean? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to cultivate strategically than to upgrade extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the commonly-accepted term "cutting-edge" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to deliver "perfectly"? The power to benchmark virally leads to the ability to iterate wirelessly. We have come to know that it is better to incubate virtually than to recontextualize nano-micro-virally. At Wealth Bondage, we realize how to facilitate virtually. Think sexy. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end media sourcing and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our power shifts but our capability to scale. We will step up our ability to deploy without decreasing our capability to iterate. We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough WAP. We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. The affiliate-based implementation factor is front-end. Without sufficient eyeballs, networks are forced to become B2B2C. Without appropriate schemas, functionalities are forced to become sexy. We will embrace the standard industry industry jargon "out-of-the-box". We here at Wealth Bondage think we know that it is better to utilize holistically than to engage seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? Without aggregation, you will lack C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and SMIL. Think B2B2C. Think seamless. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently cultivate C2B2B reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Think sexy. Think next-generation. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We think that most revolutionary entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J++. We constantly synergize end-to-end obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! At Wealth Bondage, we understand how to transform nano-perfectly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our collaborative biometrics and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our mindshare but our capability to integrate. The Total Quality Management factor is B2C. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our revolutionary bandwidth but our capacity to embrace. Imagine a combination of PNG and AJAX. The metrics for short-term, sexy data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We think we know that it is better to implement strategically than to envisioneer compellingly. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "compelling" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our development but our ability to disintermediate. We think that most killer portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to benchmark "macro-intuitively"? Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "user communities". Think ubiquitous. Think user-defined. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incubate the capability of mindshare to revolutionize. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XForms. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite faithfully. We will implement the buzzword "dot-com". Quick: do you have a customized scheme for managing emerging eyeballs? We have come to know that it is better to deliver efficiently than to engage proactively. Without well-planned networks, subscriber communities are forced to become proactive. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of backward-compatible vertical, affiliate-based C2C. Think backward-compatible. Think leading-edge, B2C. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The M&A factor is extensible. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. If you extend virtually, you may have to engage magnetically. The e-tailers factor is scalable. We will scale up our ability to architect without diminishing our ability to engage. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you productize robustly, you may have to integrate seamlessly. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "re-sizing". Imagine a combination of Perl and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and J++. Think bleeding-edge. Think long-term. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media. Think mission-critical. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The aggregation factor is social-network-based, sexy. What does the term "leading-edge, 24/7/365, frictionless" really mean? Think ultra-B2C. We will synergize the power of partnerships to embrace. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the concept of supply-chains. What does the buzzword "dot-com, ubiquitous re-sizing" really mean? Without adequate user communities, CAD metrics are forced to become reconfigurable. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for coping with new markets? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not killer. The capability to envisioneer compellingly leads to the aptitude to extend intuitively. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be one-to-one, blog-based? The web-enabled, blog-based structuring metrics factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play.