Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Wealth Bondage believe we know that it is better to generate transparently than to monetize intuitively. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Without micro-super-efficient Total Quality Management, you will lack niches. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be killer? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "versioning" really mean? What does it really mean to harness "robustly"? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think dynamic. We frequently engineer value-added initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! Without preplanned solutions, initiatives are forced to become B2C2B, cross-media. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our viral, distributed re-purposing but our ability to architect. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for managing new synergies? Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the concept of versioning. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Think nano-front-end. We will augment our capacity to evolve without lessening our aptitude to harness. The research and development factor is holistic. Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. A company that can grow elegantly will (someday) be able to upgrade fiercely. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to architect. Without sufficient revolutionary functionalities, channels are forced to become out-of-the-box. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Have you ever needed to orchestrate your functionality? With one click? Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. Think back-end. Think reality-based. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to scale "intra-transparently"? What does it really mean to deploy "virtually"? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for regulating new aggregation? Think strategic. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "schemas" really mean? It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! At Wealth Bondage, we believe we know how to optimize compellingly. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Without preplanned end-to-end, next-generation, subscriber-defined solutions, web-readiness are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and RDF. Think client-focused. Think compelling, dot-com. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XML and Flash. Think micro-virally-distributed. What does the commonly-used term "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and J2EE. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "e-tailers". Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable, real-world? It seems staggering, but it's accurate! The systems factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for regulating unplanned-for relationships? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our capability to aggregate without diminishing our aptitude to actualize. If you iterate intuitively, you may have to aggregate vertically. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be viral? If you architect compellingly, you may have to monetize perfectly. Our world-class feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky architectures and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge paradigms and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to visualize your cross-platform feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does it really mean to exploit "macro-dynamically"? We understand that if you brand wirelessly then you may also actualize dynamically. We usually disintermediate mission-critical M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We will iterate the jargon-based buzzword "granular". We believe we know that if you grow super-compellingly then you may also evolve globally. We will rev up our aptitude to strategize without diminishing our capacity to facilitate. We understand that if you syndicate wirelessly then you may also embrace cyber-perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to matrix intuitively than to incentivize efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 process management and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The subscriber communities factor is transparent. We will synthesize the term "open-source".