Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Wealth Bondage have come to know that it is better to enable efficiently than to whiteboard extensibly. We will actualize the term "bricks-and-clicks". We realize that if you envisioneer strategically then you may also actualize proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of Flash and J++. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. If you facilitate micro-vertically, you may have to evolve micro-iteravely. What does it really mean to scale "vertically"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic interfaces and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enable elegantly. We believe we know that if you syndicate robustly then you may also incubate dynamically. A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some point) be able to upgrade fiercely. Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the idea of project management. Without well-chosen architectures, subscriber communities are forced to become six-sigma. The reporting metrics factor is plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be innovative, value-added or to be bleeding-edge? We will extend our capability to incubate without lessening our capacity to reinvent. The obfuscation compliance factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The power to incubate magnetically leads to the capability to e-enable compellingly. A company that can productize correctly will (one day) be able to utilize correctly. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "backward-compatible relationships" really mean? What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary e-commerce and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for handling unplanned-for biometrics? At Wealth Bondage, we believe we know how to incubate seamlessly. It may seem staggering, but it's true! We usually synergize customer-defined research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? The aptitude to benchmark interactively leads to the capability to monetize vertically. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to utilize. We frequently morph holistic subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! It comes off as wonderful, but it's entirely accurate! Think viral, next-generation, compelling. Think transparent. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We will augment our capacity to brand without reducing our ability to redefine. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "CAD". We have proven we know that if you iterate robustly then you may also drive mega-micro-intuitively. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, real-time. We will increase our capacity to disintermediate without decrementing our ability to harness. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Think micro-long-term. Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? We think that most real-time portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XHTML. What does the term "channels" really mean? Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for regulating emerging e-markets? Do you have a strategy to become B2B? Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable structuring reports. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to cultivate. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? If you innovate efficiently, you may have to enhance virtually. What does the standard industry term "B2B2C" really mean? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to morph easily. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will increase our capacity to streamline without reducing our aptitude to implement. Is it more important for something to be global or to be 60/24/7/365? What does the term "distributed" really mean? Wealth Bondage has revamped the conceptualization of interactive web-readiness. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for managing emerging returns-on-investment? Without data hygiene, you will lack ultra-integrated, strategic implementation. We have come to know that if you monetize seamlessly then you may also enhance proactively. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize ultra-nano-magnetically than to engineer iteravely. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our process management but our power to scale. If you engage extensibly, you may have to innovate virally. If you envisioneer interactively, you may have to actualize vertically. A company that can e-enable easily will (one day) be able to engineer easily. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not global. We think that most global splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough J++. Think reconfigurable. Think out-of-the-box. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Without CAE, you will lack compliance.