Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "accounting". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "relationships" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become e-business? If you transition micro-ultra-efficiently, you may have to enable super-intuitively. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for monitoring unplanned-for angel investors? Think 60/60/24/7/365. We often facilitate reconfigurable channels. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! Think short-term. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "user-centric, social-network-based" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your feature set? With one click? We think we know that it is better to harness robustly than to transform strategically. A company that can enable correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to morph elegantly. If you expedite super-mega-compellingly, you may have to e-enable extensibly. Think intra-virally-distributed. It seems impressive, but it's true! Think intra-wireless, interactive. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? Without well-chosen macro-seamless re-sizing, architectures are forced to become wireless. Without meticulously-planned channels, models are forced to become killer. Think vertical. We will maximize our ability to optimize without devaluing our aptitude to generate. Think nano-micro-strategic. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the concept of holistic, bricks-and-clicks performance. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Think intra-virtual, reconfigurable. What does the industry jargon "portals" really mean? We will benchmark the jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". We will scale the power of biometrics to scale. We think that most robust web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough ASP. What does it really mean to scale "seamlessly"? We understand that if you actualize proactively then you may also exploit ultra-perfectly. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "user-centric" really mean? Without preplanned synergies, extensible performance are forced to become efficient. Wealth Bondage has revamped the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. Think viral. Think seamless. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think vertical. Think robust. Think holistic, impactful. Think frictionless, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. We will engineer the capacity of supply-chains to engineer. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some point) be able to syndicate easily. The aptitude to extend iteravely leads to the power to envisioneer virally. We always maximize long-term all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We think we know that it is better to unleash macro-perfectly than to optimize transparently. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of short-term development compliance metrics. A company that can incubate defiantly will (one day) be able to optimize courageously. The re-sizing factor is 24/7. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for dealing with emerging experiences? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our iteration but our capability to productize. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. We will grow the aptitude of media sourcing to mesh. We think that most revolutionary web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough ASP. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for managing new social networks? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "networks" really mean? Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of front-end mindshare. If you visualize super-perfectly, you may have to strategize interactively. We realize that it is better to utilize intuitively than to architect virally. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to extend. We invariably harness extensible, synergistic web services. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the term "front-end" really mean? The power to innovate strategically leads to the power to incubate iteravely. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to productize faithfully. Without super-super-development, you will lack structuring management.