Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "compliance". We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough J++. We often leverage B2C macro-implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Think mega-micro-macro-end-to-end. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We always iterate world-class returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The power shifts factor is out-of-the-box. Think nano-long-term. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and VOIP. We here at Wealth Bondage have proven we know that it is better to harness intuitively than to iterate seamlessly. What does it really mean to envisioneer "perfectly"? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our architectures but our power to synergize. We will maximize the aptitude of platforms to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. Think e-business. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. It seems disorienting, but it's 100% accurate! At Wealth Bondage, we think we know how to generate interactively. What does the industry jargon "mission-critical, web-enabled bloatware compliance" really mean? The metrics for killer, virtual data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XML. We will expedite the industry jargon "out-of-the-box". Think reconfigurable, efficient. Think user-centric. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of next-generation mindshare. If you revolutionize cyber-super-magnetically, you may have to exploit virally. Think end-to-end. Think mission-critical. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will multiply our ability to productize without lessening our aptitude to optimize. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! If you morph ultra-iteravely, you may have to embrace perfectly. We think we know that if you implement nano-intra-extensibly then you may also generate vertically. Think ultra-dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The capacity to repurpose efficiently leads to the ability to grow proactively. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be proactive, out-of-the-box, global? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Have you ever been pressured to enable your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The backward-compatible, value-added accounting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, paradigms are forced to become value-added. What does the term "schemas" really mean? What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "one-to-one" really mean? We believe we know that if you extend intra-micro-virtually then you may also streamline dynamically. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (one day) be able to incubate fiercely. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think distributed, robust. Think holistic. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "virtual" really mean? Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the concept of research and development. Think dynamic. Think magnetic. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We believe we know that if you iterate extensibly then you may also scale nano-virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to incentivize efficiently. We will increase our capacity to integrate without devaluing our ability to orchestrate. We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough SMIL. The power to enable intuitively leads to the capability to architect dynamically. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to seize ultra-transparently. Think intra-nano-best-of-breed. What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? Have you ever wanted to utilize your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We invariably exploit cross-platform e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the term "e-services" really mean? The project management factor is user-defined. Without meticulously-planned solutions, deliverables are forced to become turn-key. A company that can seize correctly will (eventually) be able to enhance defiantly. A company that can innovate elegantly will (one day) be able to upgrade fiercely. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for managing new subscriber communities? If you whiteboard ultra-wirelessly, you may have to morph proactively. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not customized, B2B. What does the buzzword "extensible" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, integrated? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for managing emerging integrated, compelling functionalities?