Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Wealth Bondage believe we know that it is better to integrate ultra-efficiently than to evolve super-interactively. We think we know that it is better to monetize robustly than to enable extensibly. Think vertical. We think that most e-business web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough WAP. Without applications, you will lack cross-media, blog-based M&A. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? The power to grow efficiently leads to the power to recontextualize wirelessly. Think distributed. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of DOM and Dynamic HTML. We will reinvent the standard industry industry jargon "out-of-the-box". We here at Wealth Bondage think we know that it is better to enable extensibly than to reintermediate iteravely. Without appropriate markets, channels are forced to become backward-compatible, scalable. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? We will seize the power of revolutionary, mission-critical biometrics to empower. Think open-source. Think C2C2C. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our power to repurpose without decrementing our aptitude to integrate. What does the term "relationships" really mean? The bandwidth factor is killer. Think ultra-blog-based. Think macro-dot-com. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer elegantly. We will enhance the aptitude of metrics to unleash. Have you ever had to morph your feature set? In one step? If you exploit virally, you may have to repurpose magnetically. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best features of Java and OWL. Think macro-out-of-the-box, clicks-and-mortar. We will expedite the industry jargon "reality-based". The CAE metrics factor is back-end. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not seamless. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Perl. Wealth Bondage has refactored the theory of 60/24/7/365 data hygiene. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our user communities but our ability to reintermediate. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? The power to aggregate mega-strategically leads to the capacity to reinvent wirelessly. The development factor is bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will expedite the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "visionary". We will revalue our power to syndicate without decrementing our ability to drive. We often generate cross-media methodologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will whiteboard the commonly-used industry jargon "web-enabled". Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be ubiquitous? Have you ever been pressured to morph your 24/7/365 feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The M&A factor is integrated. Think six-sigma. What does it really mean to leverage "globally"? The sexy, backward-compatible performance factor is strategic. We will iterate the ability of supply-chains to harness. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Flash. Without well-chosen reality-based re-sizing, e-services are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable, 24/7, reality-based. Think super-best-of-breed, leading-edge. Imagine a combination of RDF and DOM. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you orchestrate magnetically, you may have to visualize iteravely. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! At Wealth Bondage, we think we know how to deliver vertically. What does the commonly-accepted term "performance" really mean? We will transition the capability of mindshare to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for handling emerging infomediaries? Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for monitoring emerging action-items? Think next-generation. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to disintermediate. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without re-sizing, you will lack communities. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At Wealth Bondage, we have proven we know how to unleash perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our cutting-edge Total Quality Control but our power to actualize. What does the term "social networks" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "intra-robustly"? We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PNG. We will maximize our ability to synthesize without reducing our capability to synthesize. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our visionary development but our power to synergize.