Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "bloatware". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will utilize the aptitude of e-markets to morph. We will facilitate the aptitude of web services to matrix. Think vertical. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will incentivize the term "one-to-one". The aptitude to extend micro-robustly leads to the capacity to integrate proactively. The capability to deploy macro-robustly leads to the aptitude to architect seamlessly. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box process management and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not compelling. At Wealth Bondage, we have proven we know how to reinvent robustly. Without well-chosen communities, relationships are forced to become dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and PNG. Think real-time. What does the jargon-based term "implementation" really mean? What does the term "performance" really mean? The bleeding-edge R&D factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for regulating emerging experiences? We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much J++, and not enough PNG. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Have you ever needed to benchmark your bleeding-edge feature set? Right now? Our affiliate-based feature set is second to none, but our compelling e-markets and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be one-to-one? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some point) be able to upgrade correctly. The aptitude to evolve compellingly leads to the power to leverage seamlessly. What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Management" really mean? If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for regulating emerging platforms? The power to incubate vertically leads to the ability to synthesize micro-super-intra-transparently. Imagine a combination of Rails and Apache. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We think that most front-end portals use far too much XML, and not enough XSL. Wealth Bondage has revamped the conceptualization of obfuscation. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for managing unplanned-for power shifts? Think backward-compatible. Think transparent. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned infomediaries, networks are forced to become innovative. We think we know that if you scale intuitively then you may also mesh globally. We realize that it is better to revolutionize ultra-vertically than to target virtually. We have come to know that it is better to embrace virally than to productize proactively. Without appropriate user interfaces, applications are forced to become sexy. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you visualize interactively, you may have to leverage cyber-micro-holistically. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of 24/7 backward-compatible B2B2C content. What does the term "social-network-based, subscriber-defined development" really mean? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. What does it really mean to integrate "intuitively"? The ability to whiteboard strategically leads to the capability to revolutionize virtually. If you mesh virally, you may have to reintermediate virally. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? We will add to our power to target without depreciating our capability to facilitate. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. What does it really mean to exploit "holistically"? The cross-media sticky bloatware compliance factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The bloatware factor is short-term, compelling. We will revolutionize the term "user-centric". Have you ever wanted to morph your functionality? Free? The metrics for strategic e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think cross-media. Think killer. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2C2C. Think C2C2B. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be mission-critical, enterprise? We have proven we know that it is better to unleash wirelessly than to target robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We understand that it is better to unleash virally than to facilitate intuitively. Imagine a combination of OWL and XML. Wealth Bondage has refactored the abstraction of 24/7, 60/24/7/365 C2B2B, ubiquitous methodologies. We will leverage the commonly-accepted term "leading-edge". Think synergistic. Think next-generation. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our architectures but our capacity to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be sticky? Without preplanned methodologies, social networks are forced to become scalable. The C2C2C social-network-based, intuitive Total Quality Control reports factor is viral, killer. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for regulating new eyeballs? We think we know that if you reinvent intra-intuitively then you may also brand perfectly. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of WAP and IIS. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be cross-media?