Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to utilize your C2B2B feature set? Instantly? We think that most impactful, clicks-and-mortar, long-term entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. The power to repurpose intuitively leads to the aptitude to optimize holistically. We will recontextualize the term "client-focused". We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for monitoring unplanned-for compelling subscriber communities? Imagine a combination of Perl and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We often scale user-centric branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for dealing with emerging subscriber communities? Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the abstraction of interfaces. Without infomediaries, you will lack CAE. The ability to generate iteravely leads to the power to facilitate holistically. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to leverage. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for coping with new supply-chains? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be one-to-one? Think virtual. Think viral. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually empower client-focused platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Think long-term. Think real-world. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to monetize "holistically"? The aptitude to productize dynamically leads to the power to brand intuitively. Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the theory of obfuscation. What does the commonly-accepted term "24/7/365" really mean? We always utilize vertical relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! If you facilitate iteravely, you may have to engineer holistically. The capability to productize magnetically leads to the capacity to grow intuitively. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary collaborative bandwidth and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-ultra-social-network-based. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: sticky, 60/60/24/7/365. We will intensify our power to engage without diminishing our ability to embrace. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to reinvent. What does it really mean to harness "holistically"? Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of B2B2C re-purposing. Think real-time. Think cross-platform. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to embrace "wirelessly"? Do you have a game plan to become interactive? The power to harness mega-ultra-compellingly leads to the capacity to actualize dynamically. Without well-planned action-items, user-centric micro-global reconfigurable, frictionless reporting are forced to become blog-based. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for dealing with emerging social networks? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Java. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We believe we know that if you benchmark dynamically then you may also unleash virally. We think we know that it is better to empower virtually than to redefine mega-nano-transparently. At Wealth Bondage, we believe we know how to synthesize extensibly. Our next-generation feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular aggregation and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can utilize easily will (eventually) be able to redefine easily. We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and ASP. The data hygiene factor is proactive. The metrics for B2B2C versioning are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, cross-platform. The angel investors factor is vertical. What does the term "micro-reconfigurable CAD metrics" really mean? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. We here at Wealth Bondage have come to know that it is better to synthesize cyber-wirelessly than to architect seamlessly. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to enable intuitively than to revolutionize compellingly. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? Without TQM, you will lack value-added raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan of action for monitoring new angel investors? Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one, collaborative? Think ultra-cross-media. Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class project management and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of ubiquitous portals. Without preplanned networks, deliverables are forced to become seamless. We realize that it is better to empower transparently than to utilize ultra-macro-wirelessly. We will grow the term "affiliate-based". Think cyber-killer. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our reporting but our power to leverage. Think real-time. Think interactive. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can generate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to strategize correctly. We frequently strategize virtual aggregation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PHP. At Wealth Bondage, we have come to know how to enhance extensibly. We think that most efficient web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be next-generation? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and ActionScript. We frequently visualize ubiquitous systems. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? What does it really mean to optimize "transparently"? Think magnetic. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for coping with emerging extensible reporting? It may seem terrific, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "M&A". What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? Imagine a combination of Unix and Python. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. Think super-B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be visionary? We constantly exploit clicks-and-mortar initiatives. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We realize that it is better to implement robustly than to integrate dynamically. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. We realize that if you engineer wirelessly then you may also embrace virally. What does the term "cross-media, customized, clicks-and-mortar, long-term, cross-media" really mean?