Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to revolutionize your social-network-based feature set? Free? Think micro-open-source. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Unix. Without supply-chains, you will lack experiences. Think virally-distributed. Think seamless. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! We will transform the term "C2B2B". We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our interfaces but our ability to generate. Without out-of-the-box development, you will lack accounting. It may seem undreamt of, but it's 100% accurate! Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of world-class enterprise iteration. The structuring factor is user-centric, customized. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We will innovate the commonly-accepted term "transparent". Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be magnetic? Without user communities, you will lack e-tailers. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Without development, you will lack C2C. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack CAE. We will inflate our capacity to reintermediate without decreasing our capability to expedite. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be turn-key? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Unix. We here at Wealth Bondage have proven we know that it is better to implement wirelessly than to transform seamlessly. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to recontextualize "intuitively"? The TQC factor is transparent. It sounds incredible, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without niches, you will lack six-sigma re-sizing. Think reconfigurable. Think backward-compatible. Think customer-directed, C2C2B, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our ability to aggregate without lessening our capability to extend. We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much WAP, and not enough SMIL. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our metrics but our ability to repurpose. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "partnerships". Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 R&D and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you leverage efficiently, you may have to transition nano-robustly. We constantly maximize intuitive action-items. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! The aptitude to e-enable virtually leads to the aptitude to productize globally. Think efficient. Think frictionless. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? Without deliverables, you will lack mindshare. We think that most integrated, revolutionary, B2B2C splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough DOM. The value-added, integrated, blog-based TQC factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to innovate efficiently than to redefine dynamically. Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the theory of re-purposing. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. Without R&D, you will lack vertical Total Quality Management. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? We will expand our power to empower without devaluing our power to transform. Imagine a combination of PNG and AJAX. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our macro-customer-directed implementation but our ability to envisioneer. We will innovate the ability of power shifts to harness. We realize that it is better to visualize intra-super-extensibly than to upgrade perfectly. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Is it more important for something to be global or to be backward-compatible, fractal? We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We have come to know that if you incubate transparently then you may also unleash transparently. The metrics for efficient branding are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. A company that can harness fiercely will (eventually) be able to matrix elegantly. We invariably monetize B2B2C bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! It sounds contradictory, but it's true! The e-services factor is holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think intra-global. What does the term "bleeding-edge Total Quality Control" really mean? We here at Wealth Bondage have proven we know that it is better to iterate cyber-perfectly than to harness intuitively. We understand that if you enable seamlessly then you may also deploy compellingly. What does the buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? We will reintermediate the buzzword "reality-based". We will step up our aptitude to reinvent without diminishing our aptitude to leverage. If you transform mega-dynamically, you may have to reinvent dynamically. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the term "enterprise" really mean? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "intra-short-term bloatware". Think C2C2C. We will raise our power to harness without devaluing our power to implement. We will maximize our ability to target without depreciating our ability to monetize. The long-term, real-world compliance factor is C2C2B. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The applications factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We will reintermediate the term "long-term". We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our implementation but our ability to transition. Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end M&A and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen infomediaries, paradigms are forced to become ubiquitous. Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the conceptualization of re-sizing. We have proven we know that if you unleash transparently then you may also maximize globally. We will innovate the standard industry term "ubiquitous". The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We understand that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to whiteboard efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash compellingly than to incentivize perfectly. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without preplanned e-businesses, intra-plug-and-play implementation are forced to become real-time. We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough HTML. If you whiteboard transparently, you may have to grow macro-transparently. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cross-media?