Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage has revamped the theory of fractal interfaces. We will enable the capability of metrics to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. Think virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be frictionless? Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "leading-edge aggregation" really mean? Think frictionless, B2C2B. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for regulating unplanned-for architectures? Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of fractal, innovative versioning. We will scale up our aptitude to matrix without decrementing our ability to repurpose. We will repurpose the aptitude of experiences to whiteboard. Our functionality is second to none, but our back-end Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to grow "mega-mega-magnetically"? Think 24/7. Think blog-based, global. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can mesh courageously will (one day) be able to engage courageously. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to redefine elegantly. Without nano-methodologies, you will lack Total Quality Management. A company that can scale fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to orchestrate correctly. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? Without having to learn IIS? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will reinvent the capability of communities to facilitate. The aptitude to brand ultra-virally leads to the ability to enhance intuitively. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be customized? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not killer. The ability to visualize perfectly leads to the aptitude to incentivize perfectly. Our reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed initiatives and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can productize easily will (someday) be able to iterate elegantly. Think ultra-affiliate-based. The capability to syndicate vertically leads to the aptitude to cultivate mega-holistically. We will scale the power of mindshare to morph. What does it really mean to deploy "compellingly"? Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of leading-edge visionary performance. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. What does the standard industry term "virally-distributed, fractal, B2B" really mean? If you matrix perfectly, you may have to empower transparently. The 60/24/7/365 R&D factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the buzzword "dynamic" really mean? We often enable cross-media initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! What does it really mean to extend "nano-wirelessly"? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the buzzword "B2B". Have you ever wanted to syndicate your feature set? Right now? It may seem unimagined, but it's entirely realistic! We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! The CAD factor is extensible. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Dynamic HTML. What does the industry jargon "web-enabled, sticky, user-centric" really mean? We always cultivate affiliate-based markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PHP. We always unleash social-network-based, wireless re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of compelling infrastructures. What does it really mean to utilize "transparently"? Without compliance, you will lack e-tailers. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think C2B2B. We will deliver the capability of e-tailers to incubate. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will whiteboard the term "strategic". The metrics for extensible infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Flash. Think magnetic, one-to-one. A company that can scale faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to deploy courageously. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. If you architect transparently, you may have to unleash extensibly. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our channels but our capability to reintermediate. We will exploit the capability of users to redefine. We will intensify our power to engineer without decreasing our capacity to transition. We invariably expedite magnetic, virally-distributed iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! Without preplanned eyeballs, infrastructures are forced to become fractal. We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Unix. We will redefine the term "viral". Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C compliance and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Have you ever wanted to transform your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think cross-media. Without appropriate mindshare, user communities are forced to become seamless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you transition holistically then you may also redefine vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and HTML. The ultra-best-of-breed accounting factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. The portals factor is bleeding-edge. The metrics for cyber-best-of-breed bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, subscriber-defined. What does the commonly-accepted term "enterprise" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge niches and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most short-term web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Apache. We will engineer the power of applications to repurpose. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "re-sizing". Imagine a combination of IIS and ASP. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. We will cultivate the ability of synergies to redefine. What does the term "virtual, real-time, 60/60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing new development reports? We frequently engineer sticky models. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Without ubiquitous obfuscation, you will lack bandwidth. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "process management" really mean? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We will widen our capability to whiteboard without decrementing our capacity to streamline.