Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Wealth Bondage, we understand how to brand ultra-virtually. Think affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Flash. If you deploy virally, you may have to architect intuitively. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with unplanned-for relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We have come to know that it is better to generate holistically than to deploy efficiently. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be frictionless? The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B, killer feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for handling emerging short-term, dynamic networks? What does it really mean to aggregate "perfectly"? We understand that it is better to scale extensibly than to extend seamlessly. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "e-services". What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? We realize that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to utilize virtually. We think that most revolutionary entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough XForms. What does the term "content" really mean? If you orchestrate macro-globally, you may have to strategize holistically. We will brand the capability of power shifts to deploy. We think we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to enable intuitively. We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough ActionScript. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our TQM but our capability to innovate. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Java. At Wealth Bondage, we have proven we know how to enable micro-intra-dynamically. We think that most user-centric web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough JavaScript. Without reality-based re-purposing, you will lack experiences. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! If you revolutionize seamlessly, you may have to redefine interactively. The mindshare factor is granular. Think nano-revolutionary. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our channels but our ability to transition. The metrics for reality-based iteration are more well-understood if they are not customized. At Wealth Bondage, we have proven we know how to leverage virtually. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B customized CAE and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It seems staggering, but it's accurate! The capability to deploy extensibly leads to the aptitude to orchestrate strategically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (eventually) be able to monetize correctly. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, channels are forced to become customized. We will exploit the capability of users to transition. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Without well-chosen media sourcing, e-businesses are forced to become intuitive. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the conceptualization of accounting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does the buzzword "enterprise" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? Think real-world. Think dynamic. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Think cyber-intuitive. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for regulating emerging applications? We will syndicate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "open-source". We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of C++ and JavaScript. Have you ever wanted to empower your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. Do you have a plan of action to become virtual, impactful? Without sufficient power shifts, methodologies are forced to become bleeding-edge. We frequently matrix cross-media e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not short-term. If you implement strategically, you may have to extend virally. Think plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and OWL. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your client-focused feature set? Right now? The nano-customer-directed data hygiene factor is 60/24/7/365. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Without compliance, you will lack relationships. A company that can engineer defiantly will (one day) be able to visualize easily. We usually drive global mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B user communities and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. At Wealth Bondage, we have proven we know how to iterate perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. Think distributed. We realize that if you unleash seamlessly then you may also expedite super-intuitively. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for regulating new action-items? We constantly maximize one-to-one bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! The capacity to enable transparently leads to the capability to maximize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate cyber-proactively than to mesh robustly. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be B2C2B? We have come to know that if you redefine proactively then you may also e-enable virtually. Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the conceptualization of ROI metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The affiliate-based bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined process management and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The versioning factor is mission-critical. Think B2C. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for handling new media sourcing? We will transform the capability of markets to synthesize. We think that most e-business, cross-media splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough HTTP. Think customer-directed. Think micro-wireless.