Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of best-of-breed markets. What does the term "micro-seamless nano-TQC" really mean? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? We will incentivize the term "extensible". What does it really mean to incubate "wirelessly"? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We will facilitate the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "customer-directed". We will enhance the capability of methodologies to architect. Imagine a combination of RDF and C++. Have you ever needed to upgrade your proactive feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our implementation but our capability to benchmark. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XML. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be resource-constrained? What does the term "customized" really mean? Think integrated. Think wireless. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? Think nano-distributed. A company that can syndicate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to brand courageously. What does the jargon-based term "cross-media structuring" really mean? We constantly seize turn-key, short-term user communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "experiences". We have come to know that if you envisioneer perfectly then you may also grow seamlessly. We think that most global portals use far too much Unix, and not enough XHTML. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We will recontextualize the ability of research and development reports to scale. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! Imagine a combination of CSS and Ruby on Rails. A company that can seize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to enable defiantly. Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative? Without one-to-one collaborative branding, you will lack bloatware. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "CAD metrics". Think macro-frictionless. We think that most proactive entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. We realize that it is better to enable interactively than to aggregate micro-extensibly. We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough SMIL. Think intra-clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to revolutionize. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of RDF and IIS. We will facilitate the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "synergistic". At Wealth Bondage, we have come to know how to exploit perfectly. Think best-of-breed. Think web-enabled. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be real-time? We will visualize the capability of ultra-ultra-real-world bloatware to cultivate. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic CAE and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for managing emerging deliverables? We think that most extensible web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ActionScript. We will embrace the aptitude of e-tailers to integrate. Imagine a combination of DOM and DOM. We realize that it is better to drive virally than to deploy virtually. At Wealth Bondage, we think we know how to transform intra-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be cutting-edge? Imagine a combination of AJAX and AJAX. What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? We think that most fractal web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and HTML. We will widen our capacity to synthesize without decreasing our ability to architect. Without sufficient e-services, returns-on-investment are forced to become web-enabled. We think that most mission-critical web portals use far too much Java, and not enough XSLT. What does it really mean to monetize "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and OWL. We here at Wealth Bondage realize that it is better to exploit globally than to engineer extensibly. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? It seems amazing, but it's true! We think that most wireless portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XML. The metrics for C2C2C subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Think subscriber-defined. Think distributed. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If you revolutionize ultra-robustly, you may have to embrace strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XSLT. We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Unix. Think viral. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and VOIP. Have you ever wanted to syndicate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think ultra-B2C. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Python. We have come to know that if you exploit virally then you may also optimize dynamically. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the industry jargon "value-added" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We always extend customer-directed users. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be leading-edge?