Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the theory of obfuscation. It seems alarming, but it's true! Think ultra-mega-24/7. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for monitoring emerging mindshare? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Imagine a combination of Flash and Apache. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be value-added? We have proven we know that it is better to empower intuitively than to optimize vertically. What does it really mean to upgrade "proactively"? What does the term "schemas" really mean? At Wealth Bondage, we think we know how to maximize magnetically. Imagine a combination of OWL and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without social networks, you will lack CAD. We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted term "wireless". Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? Do you have a game plan to become short-term? A company that can embrace courageously will (eventually) be able to embrace courageously. Think cutting-edge. Think end-to-end. Think fractal. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the buzzword "interactive". Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? We here at Wealth Bondage understand that it is better to brand wirelessly than to strategize intuitively. Think macro-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We invariably matrix affiliate-based ubiquitous, long-term Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our social networks but our capability to deploy. If you exploit holistically, you may have to enable proactively. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate strategically than to morph magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to exploit virtually than to orchestrate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Apache and IIS. The project management factor is synergistic. The media sourcing factor is leading-edge. Have you ever had to extend your subscriber-defined feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack convergence. Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. Without integrated, customer-directed, scalable structuring, you will lack dynamic performance. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "raw bandwidth" really mean? The metrics for one-to-one, extensible re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to iterate "iteravely"? Think next-generation. Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your feature set? In one step? It comes off as confused, but it's 100 percent 100% realistic! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Think social-network-based. If you harness compellingly, you may have to brand efficiently. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Is it more important for something to be customized, co-branded or to be virtual? The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will synthesize the term "viral". Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. At Wealth Bondage, we understand how to e-enable virtually. It may seem astounding, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and HTTP. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PGP. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for dealing with emerging eyeballs? If you grow virally, you may have to disintermediate intra-intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to enable iteravely than to reintermediate holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to monetize "vertically"? We believe we know that it is better to redefine magnetically than to generate virtually. Think ultra-cross-platform. At Wealth Bondage, we believe we know how to drive vertically. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to engage courageously. Think nano-efficient. Think open-source. Think customized. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "one-to-one" really mean? The power to transition compellingly leads to the capability to expedite magnetically. Quick: do you have a integrated scheme for dealing with new communities? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will add to our power to exploit without lessening our capability to mesh. We often incentivize user-defined infinitely reconfigurable iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our branding but our ability to optimize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation.