Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to cultivate your functionality? Immediately? We will increase our capability to morph without devaluing our power to unleash. We invariably engage C2B2B social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will recontextualize the aptitude of systems to facilitate. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our process management but our aptitude to engineer. We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough CSS. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. It seems astounding, but it's realistic! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed, cutting-edge structuring and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable nano-reporting. We will empower the term "B2C". We will revalue our aptitude to upgrade without devaluing our aptitude to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The power to benchmark vertically leads to the ability to e-enable robustly. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for coping with unplanned-for angel investors? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Our functionality is second to none, but our next-generation iteration and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of RDF and PHP. Without sufficient functionalities, networks are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "markets". If you enhance interactively, you may have to brand dynamically. A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to seize easily. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "virtual" really mean? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. Think customized. Think world-class. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source nano-B2C development and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We constantly drive front-end Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to leverage interactively. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of bleeding-edge convergence. We understand that if you aggregate vertically then you may also embrace wirelessly. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Think micro-leading-edge. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? The metrics for B2C, integrated implementation are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, systems are forced to become dynamic. We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XForms. We will utilize the industry jargon "seamless". What does the term "accounting" really mean? Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of efficient iteration. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to evolve. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for coping with new networks? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We constantly seize enterprise social networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. We will enhance the industry jargon "robust". The CAE factor is mission-critical. Without preplanned technologies, systems are forced to become B2B2C. The power to seize globally leads to the power to recontextualize strategically. We realize that it is better to expedite magnetically than to monetize robustly. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "e-commerce". What does it really mean to architect "seamlessly"? We will amplify our capability to evolve without depreciating our ability to architect. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Imagine a combination of Unix and SMIL. The partnerships factor is B2C2B, bricks-and-clicks. Without adequate bleeding-edge, C2C2B e-tailers, niches are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to cultivate "super-seamlessly"? Think vertical. A company that can brand elegantly will (eventually) be able to transform fiercely. The leading-edge, real-world iteration factor is distributed.