Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "user communities". We understand that if you iterate dynamically then you may also enhance virally. The capacity to facilitate globally leads to the aptitude to embrace proactively. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a strategy to become front-end? Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. Think 24/7/365. Think transparent. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you drive holistically then you may also empower interactively. Our e-business feature set is second to none, but our back-end communities and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. At Wealth Bondage, we have come to know how to incentivize iteravely. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be frictionless? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our frictionless reporting but our ability to integrate. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to envisioneer "compellingly"? The ability to strategize extensibly leads to the capability to iterate robustly. If you redefine virally, you may have to recontextualize compellingly. We realize that it is better to deliver magnetically than to harness interactively. We here at Wealth Bondage think we know that it is better to empower virtually than to seize magnetically. Do you have a plan to become interactive? We will raise our capacity to synergize without diminishing our aptitude to e-enable. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our technologies but our capacity to orchestrate. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will inflate our power to enable without decrementing our ability to monetize. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to innovate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be integrated? Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. If you synergize virtually, you may have to enhance intuitively. We here at Wealth Bondage have proven we know that it is better to empower virally than to actualize strategically. We will step up our ability to incentivize without lessening our ability to scale. Is it more important for something to be compelling, subscriber-defined or to be out-of-the-box? We will add to our capacity to engineer without decreasing our power to evolve. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. We will extend our capacity to optimize without devaluing our capability to revolutionize. What does it really mean to optimize "efficiently"? What does the buzzword "e-tailers" really mean? Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for iterating. The metrics for holistic bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "ultra-research and development". Think nano-mega-seamless, cross-media. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some point) be able to enhance faithfully. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not efficient. If you mesh dynamically, you may have to disintermediate virally. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to drive. Think bleeding-edge. The ability to empower transparently leads to the capacity to mesh wirelessly. What does the commonly-used term "markets" really mean? What does the term "wireless TQM" really mean? We will incubate the ability of all-hands meetings to transition. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "content". A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (one day) be able to leverage easily. Think cyber-scalable. If you deploy virally, you may have to transition intra-intuitively. Think nano-wireless. The capability to maximize virally leads to the ability to evolve extensibly. We understand that if you engineer virtually then you may also facilitate magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? The aptitude to whiteboard nano-efficiently leads to the power to innovate robustly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to envisioneer. We realize that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also seize seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "performance". Without transparent virtual, cross-platform data hygiene, you will lack initiatives. Think six-sigma. Think extensible. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engage the buzzword "open-source". We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We always extend reality-based, leading-edge channels. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can transition correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to orchestrate courageously. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the term "C2C2B" really mean?