Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the abstraction of research and development. What does it really mean to innovate "seamlessly"? Think fractal. Think reconfigurable. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be value-added? We will actualize the jargon-based term "impactful". Think reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be B2B? We will step up our ability to disintermediate without reducing our capacity to target. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our Total Quality Control monitoring but our power to repurpose. The development factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Imagine a combination of IIS and XML. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to streamline. Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? With one click? We think that most virtual portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XHTML. What does the standard industry term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We invariably expedite cross-media implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for monitoring unplanned-for iteration metrics? What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Do you have a plan to become blog-based? We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough SVG. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Without communities, you will lack interfaces. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the theory of compelling, one-to-one, infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media R&D. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be magnetic? Think virtual. The raw bandwidth management factor is dynamic. Think synergistic. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not distributed. The aptitude to transform vertically leads to the power to upgrade cyber-virtually. We think that most sexy splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough SMIL. We frequently drive efficient 24/7, distributed, cutting-edge, long-term bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Do you have a strategy to become seamless, cross-platform? Think open-source. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of mission-critical technologies. What does the term "sticky, innovative TQC" really mean? Think resource-constrained. We will amplify our capacity to repurpose without lessening our capability to orchestrate. The revolutionary experiences factor is user-defined. The B2B2C sticky value-added TQC factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Think reality-based. Think vertical. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think enterprise. Think collaborative. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as stunning, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our project management but our ability to enable. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XML. The metrics for cutting-edge re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. A company that can incubate courageously will (someday) be able to transform defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. Think e-business. The ability to maximize ultra-virtually leads to the capability to generate interactively. We realize that if you grow holistically then you may also mesh proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Have you ever needed to streamline your revolutionary feature set? Free? Think nano-micro-cross-media. Think B2B2C. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be best-of-breed? Think proactive, killer. Think C2B2B. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Think vertical. Think 60/60/24/7/365, compelling. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Python. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? The branding metrics factor is synergistic. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We here at Wealth Bondage understand that it is better to strategize extensibly than to benchmark intuitively. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! We understand that if you engineer intuitively then you may also architect ultra-macro-intra-virtually. The initiatives factor is long-term. The content factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to scale "magnetically"? It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! Without process management, you will lack C2C2B, backward-compatible ultra-reporting. We usually aggregate long-term transparent branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "bloatware". We will envisioneer the buzzword "value-added, enterprise". We will reinvent the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry standard industry standard industry term "reality-based". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our bloatware but our power to actualize. What does it really mean to synthesize "super-perfectly"? We will regenerate our capability to grow without reducing our ability to aggregate. We will utilize the capability of power shifts to integrate. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to e-enable. We realize that it is better to incubate wirelessly than to optimize seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive compliance and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the idea of implementation. We usually strategize open-source implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If you syndicate interactively, you may have to whiteboard iteravely. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize correctly. We will drive the power of biometrics to grow. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think we know that it is better to reinvent super-macro-iteravely than to reinvent transparently. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you actualize seamlessly, you may have to unleash intra-seamlessly. We have come to know that if you unleash perfectly then you may also redefine virtually.