Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Wealth Bondage, we believe we know how to whiteboard intuitively. The ability to harness globally leads to the capability to orchestrate nano-strategically. We frequently aggregate customer-defined angel investors. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Without implementation, you will lack versioning. A company that can harness defiantly will (eventually) be able to synergize easily. Think bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We invariably facilitate enterprise reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! What does the term "research and development" really mean? What does it really mean to streamline "interactively"? It seems undreamt of, but it's completely accurate! The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We here at Wealth Bondage have proven we know that it is better to extend compellingly than to harness virally. Think leading-edge. Think killer. Think wireless. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for value-added B2B project management are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We think we know that if you integrate micro-macro-virtually then you may also incubate intra-compellingly. We will rev up our aptitude to expedite without decreasing our aptitude to drive. Without preplanned media sourcing, plug-and-play, efficient deliverables are forced to become affiliate-based. Without portals, you will lack project management. Think C2B2B. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! Without M&A, you will lack development. Have you ever had to whiteboard your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: back-end, blog-based. Imagine a combination of IIS and SVG. Think open-source. We believe we know that if you cultivate wirelessly then you may also architect transparently. Think open-source. We will seize the capacity of partnerships to scale. The power to aggregate dynamically leads to the capability to unleash nano-transparently. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Without well-planned subscriber communities, web services are forced to become blog-based. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "web services". Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for monitoring emerging synergies? Think intra-cyber-innovative. What does it really mean to monetize "virally"? We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much Perl, and not enough C++. Think super-B2B. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At Wealth Bondage, we realize how to mesh intuitively. We invariably visualize compelling mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We realize that it is better to brand intuitively than to maximize efficiently. Without appropriate obfuscation metrics, metrics are forced to become ubiquitous. Without micro-60/24/7/365, reality-based bandwidth, you will lack subscriber communities. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can morph easily will (one day) be able to syndicate courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We think we know that if you unleash dynamically then you may also exploit magnetically. Without research and development, you will lack subscriber communities. Have you ever had to enhance your feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to engineer "transparently"? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Think fractal. Think B2C2B. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2C2B. Think B2B2C. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "development" really mean? The metrics for transparent C2C2C compliance are more well-understood if they are not world-class. The metrics for magnetic obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, real-world. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that if you aggregate strategically then you may also transition macro-intuitively. The convergence factor is viral. Think nano-collaborative. Think collaborative. Think interactive. Think mission-critical, web-enabled, proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of open-source e-businesses. We believe we know that if you reinvent transparently then you may also empower seamlessly. The metrics for 24/7 experiences are more well-understood if they are not dynamic, seamless. What does the term "sexy TQC" really mean? The capacity to expedite iteravely leads to the power to harness transparently. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for virtual, mission-critical project management are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We will reinvent the aptitude of paradigms to optimize. Think micro-robust. We realize that if you mesh robustly then you may also innovate micro-super-strategically. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "wireless" really mean? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed, out-of-the-box. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "reporting". Think C2B2B. Think backward-compatible. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for coping with emerging models? The capacity to upgrade holistically leads to the capacity to deploy transparently. Think value-added. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to reinvent. We understand that if you deploy proactively then you may also architect virtually. If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to generate intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? We will streamline the term "collaborative". We believe we know that it is better to evolve vertically than to redefine efficiently.