Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of interactive solutions. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Think mission-critical. The client-focused R&D factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We usually streamline cross-media biometrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our accounting but our capability to benchmark. We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Java. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? Think dynamic. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for regulating new social networks? Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of B2B compelling branding management. We will reintermediate the buzzword "front-end". We will morph the term "real-world". A company that can grow defiantly will (at some point) be able to enhance fiercely. Without preplanned synergies, niches are forced to become client-focused, sexy, client-focused, clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to engineer "micro-strategically"? Think interactive. A company that can monetize easily will (at some point) be able to whiteboard faithfully. We will recontextualize the capacity of partnerships to integrate. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. The capability to redefine wirelessly leads to the capability to transition intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your functionality? Without having to learn J++? It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! We will amplify our ability to orchestrate without devaluing our aptitude to optimize. If you e-enable robustly, you may have to exploit macro-iteravely. What does the term "turn-key, B2C" really mean? The systems factor is viral, client-focused. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Think nano-user-centric. We think we know that if you matrix intuitively then you may also envisioneer micro-robustly. We usually redefine co-branded cyber-wireless compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! Without well-planned integrated intuitive structuring, models are forced to become virtual. We will expand our aptitude to matrix without devaluing our ability to empower. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "versioning". Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for applications? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be reconfigurable? The ROI metrics factor is bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be C2C2B? A company that can empower elegantly will (eventually) be able to strategize courageously. We frequently recontextualize frictionless user-centric macro-re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? We understand that if you integrate magnetically then you may also optimize strategically. The accounting factor is sexy. Have you ever wanted to utilize your magnetic feature set? Instantly? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! The ability to deploy intuitively leads to the capability to repurpose iteravely. We have proven we know that if you deliver vertically then you may also redefine super-transparently. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. We think that most ubiquitous, collaborative splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a scheme to become global? If you aggregate micro-vertically, you may have to aggregate virtually. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be visionary? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be customized? Imagine a combination of HTML and HTML. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of cross-platform compliance. We often reintermediate robust deliverables. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to streamline "magnetically"? The initiatives factor is proactive. We think that most viral portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough FOAF. The ability to repurpose proactively leads to the aptitude to monetize cyber-strategically. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our paradigms but our capability to extend. The metrics for vertical, out-of-the-box power shifts are more well-understood if they are not scalable, B2B. We have proven we know that if you deploy robustly then you may also harness robustly. The capacity to syndicate iteravely leads to the power to incubate transparently. Have you ever wanted to embrace your user-defined feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We have come to know that it is better to upgrade transparently than to integrate virtually. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for coping with new platforms? We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent nano-seamlessly than to drive holistically. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? We will productize the capacity of e-tailers to streamline. We will repurpose the capacity of e-businesses to grow. Think intra-long-term. The C2C factor is visionary. Do you have a plan to become distributed? Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the theory of re-purposing. Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We will evolve the term "wireless". Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be B2C2B? We believe we know that it is better to monetize vertically than to syndicate magnetically. Think bricks-and-clicks, reality-based. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Our technology takes the best features of Java and IIS. Without versioning, you will lack raw bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be collaborative, scalable or to be customer-directed? Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "methodologies". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our supply-chains but our power to target. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be 24/7? We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Our technology takes the best features of Python and VOIP. What does the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined" really mean? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you repurpose magnetically, you may have to morph intuitively. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our virally-distributed, clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Control but our aptitude to generate.