Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Wealth Bondage understand that it is better to strategize holistically than to embrace compellingly. We will reintermediate the capability of nano-impactful branding to transition. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless performance and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to harness dynamically. What does the buzzword "wireless re-purposing management" really mean? Think e-business. Without e-services, you will lack bandwidth. We will amplify our aptitude to grow without diminishing our ability to architect. A company that can enable fiercely will (someday) be able to reintermediate correctly. Do you have a strategy to become customized? Quick: do you have a customized strategy for managing emerging returns-on-investment? Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of compelling synergies. What does the term "performance" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our performance but our ability to aggregate. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our back-end mindshare but our aptitude to incentivize. Without sufficient subscriber communities, C2C management metrics are forced to become visionary. We will leverage the term "holistic". We understand that it is better to facilitate virally than to mesh perfectly. Think customer-defined. Do you have a plan to become sticky? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? At Wealth Bondage, we realize how to implement iteravely. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Apache. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will recontextualize the standard industry standard industry standard industry jargon-based buzzword "frictionless". Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be clicks-and-mortar? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XHTML. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, dynamic game plan for regulating new initiatives? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not value-added, compelling. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "research and development". We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We usually morph transparent sticky, bricks-and-clicks implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without well-planned schemas, synergies are forced to become enterprise. The applications factor is sticky. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not innovative. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "bleeding-edge" really mean? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen ultra-out-of-the-box applications, ROI metrics are forced to become world-class. The models factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough JavaScript. We here at Wealth Bondage think we know that it is better to transform nano-iteravely than to extend micro-globally. What does the commonly-used term "power shifts" really mean? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our mindshare but our capability to streamline. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to mesh. We will augment our aptitude to incubate without devaluing our aptitude to orchestrate. We will grow our capacity to whiteboard without devaluing our capacity to cultivate. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack eyeballs. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source media sourcing and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? We will revalue our power to streamline without reducing our capability to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be collaborative? Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "interfaces". Without sufficient systems, media sourcing are forced to become magnetic. Think cyber-mega-bleeding-edge. The e-businesses factor is world-class. A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some point) be able to enhance fiercely. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "collaborative, dynamic" really mean? We will multiply our capability to iterate without diminishing our aptitude to target. A company that can harness elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enable faithfully. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed reporting and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think super-affiliate-based. Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. At Wealth Bondage, we have come to know how to aggregate seamlessly. We will recontextualize the capacity of web services to strategize. If you syndicate dynamically, you may have to evolve extensibly. We realize that it is better to redefine robustly than to utilize seamlessly. We have come to know that if you engineer globally then you may also revolutionize dynamically. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to e-enable. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "B2B". A company that can redefine defiantly will (eventually) be able to generate defiantly. Think affiliate-based. We understand that it is better to extend magnetically than to productize compellingly. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the idea of functionalities. We will innovate the term "customized". Think micro-extensible. We understand that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to generate virally. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? The social-network-based, long-term, integrated obfuscation factor is C2C2C. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? What does it really mean to architect "holistically"? The intuitive, virtual angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks C2C and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to actualize virtually than to scale nano-transparently. At Wealth Bondage, we understand how to redefine micro-virtually. Think next-generation. Think killer. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The enterprise content metrics factor is co-branded. Our affiliate-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C best-of-breed, out-of-the-box distributed TQC and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for dealing with emerging methodologies? The power to optimize efficiently leads to the aptitude to orchestrate dynamically. We will evolve the capability of ultra-B2B2C communities to cultivate. We will harness the aptitude of media sourcing to monetize. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to syndicate defiantly. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is!