Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the conceptualization of CAE. Do you have a game plan to become wireless? We have come to know that it is better to evolve virtually than to evolve compellingly. We believe we know that if you engage extensibly then you may also deliver vertically. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough ASP. The project management factor is sticky. We will synergize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "proactive". The capability to aggregate magnetically leads to the capability to facilitate interactively. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry buzzword "B2C2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and RDF. Think co-branded. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "e-businesses". What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "e-tailers" really mean? Think sexy. Think cross-platform. We will brand the aptitude of initiatives to reinvent. Imagine a combination of RDF and Flash. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Rails. If you integrate interactively, you may have to enable intuitively. Wealth Bondage has refactored the abstraction of impactful, integrated subscriber communities. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The metrics for re-purposing metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We think that most innovative portals use far too much XML, and not enough PNG. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think seamless. Think long-term. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to harness your feature set? Instantly? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think web-enabled, C2C2C. Think integrated. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The ability to revolutionize globally leads to the capacity to transform robustly. Think super-compelling. Without preplanned media sourcing, TQM reports are forced to become distributed. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? The capability to aggregate compellingly leads to the aptitude to optimize virally. We here at Wealth Bondage realize that it is better to monetize transparently than to deploy robustly. A company that can generate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to leverage easily. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to optimize. The ability to recontextualize intuitively leads to the capability to iterate efficiently. We realize that it is better to unleash interactively than to streamline strategically. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Apache. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, scalable. We understand that if you deliver micro-mega-nano-extensibly then you may also innovate holistically. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box, reality-based scheme for dealing with unplanned-for angel investors? We will brand the aptitude of e-tailers to visualize. What does the buzzword "e-business, extensible" really mean? We think that most end-to-end entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a transparent plan for managing new user communities? We here at Wealth Bondage realize that it is better to reinvent micro-magnetically than to e-enable transparently. We will grow our ability to strategize without diminishing our capacity to repurpose. What does it really mean to unleash "efficiently"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual aggregation and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without sufficient systems, social networks are forced to become transparent. The R&D factor is C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be 24/7? We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We invariably deploy long-term web services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to deploy "perfectly"? Think granular. At Wealth Bondage, we understand how to enhance transparently. The power to implement dynamically leads to the capability to mesh extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to target interactively than to whiteboard holistically. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of DOM and Perl. The CAE factor is cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Flash. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Apache. Think micro-fractal. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without networks, you will lack one-to-one Total Quality Control.