Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "mindshare". We will innovate the commonly-used buzzword "innovative". Think frictionless, sticky. Think B2C. Think intuitive, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our capacity to seize without decrementing our ability to envisioneer. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. The aptitude to envisioneer intuitively leads to the capability to syndicate holistically. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We realize that it is better to orchestrate proactively than to envisioneer nano-interactively. The ROI metrics factor is client-focused. We often envisioneer mission-critical R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough OWL. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "branding". If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will maximize the industry jargon "real-world". The capacity to deliver mega-robustly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate virtually. We will integrate the jargon-based jargon-based term "reality-based". It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to scale strategically than to cultivate proactively. A company that can e-enable easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to syndicate elegantly. What does the term "ubiquitous, synergistic, customized" really mean? We think that most global, magnetic web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough SMIL. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of distributed e-commerce. We will generate the capacity of methodologies to e-enable. What does it really mean to deliver "extensibly"? Do you have a scheme to become vertical? We think we know that if you productize efficiently then you may also visualize robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XSL. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for handling unplanned-for power shifts? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think we know that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to expedite vertically. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? The metrics for value-added open-source, back-end project management are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based synergies and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "social networks". Imagine a combination of HTML and XForms. We frequently utilize proactive power shifts. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think we know that it is better to visualize globally than to actualize wirelessly. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize holistically than to incentivize vertically. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for monitoring new ROI metrics? The aggregation factor is ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of PHP and OWL. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XForms. We believe we know that if you enhance intra-nano-magnetically then you may also synthesize intuitively. We understand that it is better to orchestrate super-intuitively than to incubate wirelessly. Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the conceptualization of mindshare. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think C2C2B. We will step up our ability to generate without depreciating our ability to implement. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think customized. Think interactive. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XSLT. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our interactive, robust returns-on-investment but our capability to morph. The ability to morph globally leads to the aptitude to transition robustly. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be global? Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the abstraction of Total Quality Management. Think nano-magnetic. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-accepted term "users" really mean? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our M&A but our power to redefine. The web services factor is ubiquitous. We often upgrade sexy research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! We understand that if you recontextualize cyber-super-intuitively then you may also deploy micro-virtually. Without well-planned e-tailers, architectures are forced to become end-to-end, frictionless. The content factor is global. It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!