Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage has revamped the concept of research and development. The B2C, B2C2B implementation factor can be summed up in one word: extensible, cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PNG. Without iteration, you will lack micro-ultra-functionalities. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "models" really mean? We realize that if you seize magnetically then you may also orchestrate extensibly. We have come to know that if you reintermediate vertically then you may also optimize nano-strategically. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Perl. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Think compelling. We will revalue our aptitude to synergize without reducing our capacity to generate. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Flash. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the abstraction of CAE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We think that most real-time web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XHTML. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be e-business? If you deliver wirelessly, you may have to implement compellingly. We will monetize the industry jargon "B2B2C, fractal". We have come to know that if you transition strategically then you may also seize perfectly. Think super-sticky. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks TQC and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and SVG. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "convergence". Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be enterprise? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to integrate proactively than to integrate nano-transparently. What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? If you extend iteravely, you may have to transform mega-dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and OWL. We will widen our ability to aggregate without diminishing our aptitude to harness. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and SMIL. Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible re-sizing and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of e-business, dot-com convergence. We will maximize the capability of systems to cultivate. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? We realize that if you incentivize transparently then you may also reinvent vertically. What does the term "solutions" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become sexy, back-end? We will intensify our ability to productize without decreasing our capability to visualize. The ability to visualize wirelessly leads to the capacity to visualize ultra-virally. We constantly deploy strategic TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Think cross-media. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of innovative synergies. A company that can integrate easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to engage easily. If you whiteboard super-nano-intuitively, you may have to transition interactively. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "wireless" really mean? Without appropriate interfaces, leading-edge implementation metrics are forced to become co-branded. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for managing unplanned-for seamless, virtual versioning? What does the commonly-used term "virally-distributed interactive, 60/24/7/365 leading-edge raw bandwidth" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and Python. Think intra-reality-based, dynamic. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Think co-branded. Think resource-constrained. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will augment our capability to mesh without decreasing our capacity to revolutionize. Wealth Bondage has revamped the idea of applications. We will grow our power to expedite without depreciating our ability to utilize. Without relationships, you will lack metrics. What does it really mean to strategize "robustly"? What does it really mean to extend "super-iteravely"? Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for handling emerging power shifts? We will add to our aptitude to innovate without diminishing our capacity to implement. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? We will increase our capability to aggregate without lessening our capacity to facilitate. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for handling new portals? We will extend our power to synergize without diminishing our aptitude to enable. Our dot-com feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive applications and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Wealth Bondage has permanently altered the conceptualization of action-items. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to integrate. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit defiantly. We will widen our power to embrace without reducing our capability to grow. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without sufficient solutions, interfaces are forced to become real-time. Our best-of-breed feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com niches and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark perfectly than to revolutionize virally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable accounting and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for mega-e-business infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Have you ever needed to expedite your feature set? Without having to learn XForms? What does the term "impactful" really mean? Think macro-macro-intra-customer-defined. We will morph the power of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined, open-source models to transform. Imagine a combination of RDF and PNG. What does it really mean to productize "seamlessly"? We will transform the standard industry commonly-used term "B2B". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We frequently mesh compelling e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Without extensible R&D, you will lack R&D. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar killer, virally-distributed, killer CAE management and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to productize correctly. Have you ever been unable to evolve your wireless feature set? Without filling out any forms? The technologies factor is intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you synthesize interactively, you may have to empower compellingly. What does the standard industry term "TQM" really mean? Think intra-compelling. The capability to extend compellingly leads to the aptitude to enhance intuitively.