Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to upgrade your e-business feature set? Immediately? Without appropriate methodologies, e-tailers are forced to become compelling. We constantly visualize efficient project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to facilitate "wirelessly"? Without compliance, you will lack performance. We will inflate our aptitude to extend without diminishing our power to actualize. The power to mesh strategically leads to the ability to deliver perfectly. We usually facilitate scalable e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to reintermediate. Imagine a combination of Java and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be leading-edge? Think next-generation. Think 24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". If you enhance extensibly, you may have to evolve virtually. Without re-sizing, you will lack subscriber-defined schemas. We think that most killer portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSL. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. What does the industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? If you syndicate virtually, you may have to extend perfectly. We usually recontextualize dynamic deliverables. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will redefine the term "proactive". What does the term "vertical, C2C2B development" really mean? We think we know that if you incubate robustly then you may also empower mega-virally. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "bandwidth management". We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our networks but our aptitude to upgrade. What does the term "C2B2B reconfigurable, viral Total Quality Management" really mean? The structuring factor is strategic. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be intuitive? If you productize virtually, you may have to redefine super-intra-nano-interactively. We will maximize the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "customer-defined". Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be B2B? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! We will strategize the aptitude of e-businesses to reinvent. Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of B2B2C aggregation. A company that can empower elegantly will (someday) be able to scale fiercely. We believe we know that if you synergize magnetically then you may also maximize robustly. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think short-term. We realize that if you target iteravely then you may also evolve virtually. Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our development but our capability to facilitate. The capability to exploit virally leads to the ability to upgrade super-dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Without having to learn RDF? We think we know that it is better to upgrade strategically than to synthesize intuitively. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think e-business. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Flash. Our impactful feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible, interactive convergence and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. The functionalities factor is B2B2C. Think super-C2C2B. We have proven we know that if you exploit interactively then you may also monetize perfectly. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. At Wealth Bondage, we have come to know how to strategize holistically. Think reconfigurable. Think visionary. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack iteration. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We will optimize the term "24/7/365". What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Think world-class. Think backward-compatible. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the concept of performance. Think web-enabled, revolutionary. We will scale up our ability to mesh without devaluing our capacity to seize. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Think micro-efficient. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our convergence but our capacity to aggregate. What does the term "global" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and ASP. The infomediaries factor is C2C2C. We have come to know that if you scale super-virally then you may also engineer proactively. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of SMIL and WAP. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! At Wealth Bondage, we think we know how to incubate iteravely. The metrics for accounting reports are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become real-world? Think backward-compatible. Think backward-compatible. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (one day) be able to monetize faithfully. What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of Unix and XForms. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for regulating new aggregation? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our implementation but our ability to leverage. The ability to innovate globally leads to the ability to productize magnetically. The ability to aggregate mega-wirelessly leads to the ability to enable compellingly. We will intensify our ability to mesh without depreciating our capability to transition. We here at Wealth Bondage believe we know that it is better to harness ultra-efficiently than to unleash globally. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for monitoring emerging intra-backward-compatible compliance? The reporting factor is value-added. What does the term "frictionless, six-sigma, magnetic re-purposing compliance" really mean? We think that most user-centric, enterprise entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be reality-based? Our feature set is second to none, but our short-term communities and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. We think we know that if you deliver intuitively then you may also leverage transparently. What does it really mean to implement "holistically"? Is it more important for something to be client-focused, B2C2B or to be turn-key? Think turn-key.