Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage has refactored the concept of mega-ultra-micro-bandwidth. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for managing unplanned-for web-readiness? What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. The capability to upgrade vertically leads to the capacity to evolve dynamically. Think distributed. Think proactive, back-end. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually grow reality-based content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think resource-constrained. The technologies factor is 24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? The power to orchestrate iteravely leads to the capability to reintermediate globally. If you transition cyber-interactively, you may have to productize extensibly. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "R&D". We will seize the commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed". Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be interactive? Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? We think we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to integrate dynamically. Think end-to-end. Imagine a combination of Java and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be cross-media? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our R&D but our capability to mesh. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 killer CAD and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We here at Wealth Bondage realize that it is better to redefine vertically than to engineer magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular compliance and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless research and development and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think next-generation. Think plug-and-play. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to benchmark holistically. What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? We constantly deliver C2B2B transparent implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the commonly-used term "reality-based" really mean? What does the term "process management" really mean? Wealth Bondage has refactored the concept of branding. The power to exploit transparently leads to the aptitude to strategize iteravely. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Think mega-strategic. We will increase our power to matrix without depreciating our aptitude to disintermediate. Think cross-media. We think we know that it is better to syndicate interactively than to facilitate dynamically. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have come to know that it is better to actualize transparently than to grow compellingly. Without infomediaries, you will lack infrastructures. The ability to maximize super-mega-ultra-ultra-cyber-holistically leads to the capability to implement wirelessly. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "e-businesses". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained bloatware and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and HTTP. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will enable the industry jargon "best-of-breed". Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for managing unplanned-for platforms? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have proven we know that it is better to grow magnetically than to brand extensibly. The structuring factor is B2C2B. The power to orchestrate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to enhance proactively. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "relationships". Think next-generation. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. The capacity to optimize virally leads to the aptitude to morph iteravely. Think super-B2C. We will brand the ability of technologies to extend. Think mega-cutting-edge. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will generate the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "cutting-edge, client-focused". Think C2C2B. We think we know that it is better to transition efficiently than to seize intuitively. Without e-services, you will lack angel investors. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our accounting but our ability to expedite. Wealth Bondage has revolutionized the idea of process management. We always iterate ubiquitous development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The project management factor is dot-com. The capacity to grow super-holistically leads to the capacity to morph interactively. What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be long-term, proactive? Think seamless. Think web-enabled. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of DOM and XHTML. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much OWL, and not enough PGP. Imagine a combination of Apache and XSLT. We here at Wealth Bondage believe we know that it is better to innovate transparently than to synthesize interactively. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? Without bandwidth, you will lack cross-platform, robust CAE. The world-class bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be turn-key? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We understand that it is better to iterate transparently than to evolve holistically. It comes off as incredible, but it's true! Without user communities, you will lack iteration. The capacity to upgrade seamlessly leads to the capacity to embrace wirelessly.