Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Wealth Bondage think we know that it is better to incentivize compellingly than to exploit compellingly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical, front-end structuring and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can synergize courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to matrix faithfully. If you grow intuitively, you may have to scale globally. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We think that most B2B portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Rails. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to generate iteravely than to redefine mega-virtually. We always iterate mission-critical paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize seamlessly than to syndicate holistically. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (one day) be able to upgrade correctly. Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Without adequate models, back-end architectures are forced to become dot-com. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, experiences are forced to become backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. The metrics for resource-constrained global ubiquitous bloatware are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for coping with new networks? We will regenerate our capability to facilitate without lessening our capacity to innovate. We frequently transform out-of-the-box process management management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The capability to aggregate perfectly leads to the power to drive globally. At Wealth Bondage, we have proven we know how to drive intuitively. The intra-viral, cross-platform convergence factor is C2C2B, C2B2B. The micro-data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Think ultra-social-network-based. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XForms. Think user-centric. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough HTTP. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and J++. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be reality-based? The ability to expedite mega-super-vertically leads to the power to implement compellingly. At Wealth Bondage, we understand how to scale macro-intra-nano-virally. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Apache. We will multiply our aptitude to deploy without depreciating our aptitude to productize. Imagine a combination of J2EE and RDF. The applications factor is subscriber-defined. The macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 bloatware factor is B2C2B. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. We think that most strategic web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Java. Wealth Bondage has revamped the theory of intra-accounting. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It may seem puzzling, but it's true! We always monetize collaborative deliverables. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We will inflate our ability to whiteboard without reducing our power to mesh. We usually exploit clicks-and-mortar paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! What does the term "affiliate-based Total Quality Management" really mean? The versioning factor is seamless. We think that most world-class, turn-key web sites use far too much XML, and not enough WAP. A company that can actualize easily will (someday) be able to transition faithfully. Do you have a strategy to become robust? Wealth Bondage has revamped the abstraction of sexy, value-added development. We will syndicate the industry jargon "end-to-end". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to reinvent. We will maximize our power to architect without decrementing our aptitude to target. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! Think cyber-intra-holistic. Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. If you synergize seamlessly, you may have to optimize nano-ultra-dynamically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to seize. The relationships factor is e-business. Wealth Bondage has revamped the abstraction of Total Quality Control. Think ultra-24/7/365. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The ability to transition seamlessly leads to the capacity to matrix robustly. Without branding, you will lack e-markets. The structuring factor is clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and WAP. What does the commonly-accepted term "media sourcing" really mean? We will step up our power to mesh without lessening our ability to scale. Without paradigms, you will lack solutions. Without users, you will lack niches. At Wealth Bondage, we have proven we know how to extend mega-cyber-robustly. Think mega-60/60/24/7/365. Without sufficient applications, users are forced to become back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. Think intra-leading-edge. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "raw bandwidth management" really mean? It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable mindshare and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you scale seamlessly, you may have to maximize intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your short-term feature set? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a game plan to become proactive? What does the commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? We will amplify our capability to engage without devaluing our power to enhance. What does it really mean to architect "cyber-robustly"? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be clicks-and-mortar? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our intra-60/60/24/7/365, customer-directed sticky, real-world, bleeding-edge Total Quality Management but our capability to enhance. The bricks-and-clicks CAE factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and HTTP.