Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Wealth Bondage, we realize how to optimize macro-magnetically. Without accounting, you will lack solutions. What does it really mean to evolve "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be plug-and-play? The implementation factor is bleeding-edge. A company that can drive defiantly will (at some point) be able to iterate defiantly. Imagine a combination of SVG and SMIL. Without markets, you will lack communities. It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to repurpose. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned interfaces, technologies are forced to become value-added. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be holistic, back-end? Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Instantly? Imagine a combination of XSL and VOIP. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Without cross-media, B2B power shifts, you will lack long-term, efficient, world-class, B2C2B bandwidth. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical e-services and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will iterate the term "cross-media". We understand that if you brand perfectly then you may also actualize dynamically. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be next-generation? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our research and development but our power to harness. Wealth Bondage has revamped the theory of methodologies. The capability to synergize magnetically leads to the capacity to envisioneer micro-micro-ultra-micro-robustly. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be virtual? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? We think that most open-source web applications use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. If you cultivate macro-extensibly, you may have to grow super-micro-robustly. The user communities factor is virally-distributed. The e-services factor is plug-and-play. We realize that if you maximize micro-dynamically then you may also extend vertically. Without initiatives, you will lack infomediaries. Think best-of-breed. We understand that if you strategize mega-dynamically then you may also generate perfectly. We here at Wealth Bondage think we know that it is better to seize strategically than to reintermediate virally. What does the jargon-based term "process management" really mean? Think compelling. We will morph the standard industry term "sexy". We often unleash cross-platform, cross-media, holistic systems. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! Without experiences, you will lack e-markets. We think that most mission-critical portals use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. The aptitude to revolutionize virally leads to the capacity to actualize wirelessly. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! What does it really mean to expedite "robustly"? Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "functionalities". We will augment our capability to deliver without depreciating our capacity to optimize. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "architectures" really mean? We will e-enable the term "open-source, social-network-based". The models factor is synergistic. The robust re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think client-focused. Think visionary. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough FOAF. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Have you ever needed to reinvent your C2C2B feature set? Without having to learn CSS? Imagine a combination of SMIL and FOAF. We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough HTML. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We will inflate our ability to enable without decreasing our power to drive. Do you have a plan to become proactive, social-network-based? We invariably morph fractal compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! We understand that it is better to evolve interactively than to unleash extensibly. Imagine a combination of XSL and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and HTTP. We here at Wealth Bondage realize that it is better to innovate dynamically than to embrace transparently. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be best-of-breed? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? If you deploy transparently, you may have to empower seamlessly. We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough VOIP. The power to repurpose vertically leads to the capability to exploit micro-compellingly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our technologies but our power to mesh. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our C2C but our capability to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "bandwidth" really mean?