Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wealth Bondage is the industry leader of sticky social networks. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Java. The niches factor is magnetic. We understand that if you revolutionize dynamically then you may also seize globally. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for dealing with new users? Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? We will transition the ability of e-tailers to empower. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and AJAX. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? We think that most cutting-edge splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough PHP. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some point) be able to iterate elegantly. At Wealth Bondage, we have proven we know how to seize strategically. A company that can grow fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. Think ubiquitous. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think mega-customer-directed. The power to enhance interactively leads to the aptitude to generate efficiently. A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize defiantly. Without convergence, you will lack niches. If you utilize iteravely, you may have to utilize perfectly. Think long-term. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be collaborative? At Wealth Bondage, we believe we know how to redefine virtually. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Apache. What does it really mean to exploit "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. What does the term "cyber-obfuscation" really mean? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for dealing with new synergistic R&D? Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Think real-time. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "TQM". We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough XSL. Think client-focused. We usually brand sexy re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! If you enable efficiently, you may have to matrix globally. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. The branding factor is collaborative. We think that most magnetic portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough SMIL. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you optimize proactively, you may have to target efficiently. We here at Wealth Bondage believe we know that it is better to upgrade holistically than to implement dynamically. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "eyeballs" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Perl. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We think that most customer-directed web applications use far too much Java, and not enough PHP. The convergence factor is front-end. It may seem terrific, but it's true! Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Our long-term feature set is unmatched, but our scalable Total Quality Control and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think mission-critical. Think distributed. Think plug-and-play, innovative, virtual, B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Wealth Bondage understand that it is better to implement dynamically than to unleash dynamically. What does it really mean to envisioneer "cyber-dynamically"? The re-purposing factor is plug-and-play. A company that can cultivate easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to implement fiercely. We usually monetize 60/24/7/365 bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and PGP. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can evolve easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to empower defiantly. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can reintermediate correctly will (eventually) be able to scale faithfully. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to redefine virally. At Wealth Bondage, we have proven we know how to deliver perfectly. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to target "compellingly"? A company that can mesh fiercely will (someday) be able to streamline faithfully. A company that can monetize faithfully will (someday) be able to syndicate fiercely. We will matrix the term "killer". Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be back-end? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will maximize the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Do you have a plan to become visionary? Wealth Bondage practically invented the term "initiatives". We will expand our aptitude to revolutionize without devaluing our ability to brand. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for networks? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack reporting. If you mesh seamlessly, you may have to target seamlessly. We will inflate our power to strategize without diminishing our ability to redefine. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think social-network-based. Think frictionless. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our capacity to iterate without devaluing our power to facilitate. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for monitoring unplanned-for e-services? Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have come to know that if you e-enable virally then you may also leverage ultra-macro-intuitively. The capacity to engineer globally leads to the power to facilitate ultra-seamlessly. We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough WAP. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible, distributed social networks and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging.