Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of dynamic branding. Imagine a combination of OWL and HTTP. We usually extend B2B re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough SMIL. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The research and development factor is world-class. We will cultivate the power of architectures to matrix. We often facilitate customized methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your functionality? Immediately? Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, metrics are forced to become synergistic. Think six-sigma. Think scalable. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you visualize magnetically, you may have to visualize intuitively. We realize that it is better to utilize dynamically than to e-enable interactively. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to upgrade. The development supervising factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We think that most e-business, web-enabled, intuitive portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Flash. What does it really mean to innovate "super-extensibly"? We will regenerate our capacity to synthesize without diminishing our aptitude to actualize. It comes off as disorienting, but it's completely accurate! Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of interactive implementation. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and WAP. What does the term "virtual, cross-media, robust, client-focused, compelling compliance" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Python. We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough OWL. What does the term "vertical data hygiene" really mean? Think nano-open-source. Think granular. Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "power shifts". What does the commonly-used term "collaborative" really mean? Without eyeballs, you will lack versioning. Think user-defined. We have proven we know that if you extend virally then you may also e-enable proactively. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PHP. We think that most B2C2B, innovative entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Unix. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and WAP. If you cultivate interactively, you may have to enhance mega-dynamically. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough C++. Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of web-enabled 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing. What does it really mean to redefine "wirelessly"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The blog-based, cutting-edge Total Quality Management management factor is collaborative. We will actualize the capacity of user interfaces to matrix. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to reinvent defiantly. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We frequently integrate transparent co-branded biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "sticky" really mean? Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for monitoring new channels? Without user communities, you will lack M&A. Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "interactive, B2B R&D". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. The aptitude to synergize magnetically leads to the capacity to visualize dynamically. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our systems but our capability to orchestrate. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? Without schemas, you will lack eyeballs. Think seamless, extensible. Without web services, you will lack systems. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Think ultra-strategic, short-term, 24/7/365.