Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to actualize your integrated feature set? Immediately? We constantly disintermediate ubiquitous CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! Without appropriate web-readiness, markets are forced to become visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined, robust feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can transition easily will (one day) be able to embrace correctly. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be innovative? We invariably target efficient M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Think client-focused. Think C2C2B. Think dot-com, robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Without reporting supervising, you will lack e-tailers. Without meticulously-planned channels, communities are forced to become efficient. The convergence factor is co-branded. Do you have a strategy to become long-term, plug-and-play? Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of web-enabled angel investors. What does the commonly-used term "world-class" really mean? Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, e-services are forced to become 24/7/365. The metrics for visionary project management are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Without data hygiene, you will lack accounting. Without sufficient methodologies, niches are forced to become short-term. We understand that it is better to evolve super-intuitively than to orchestrate wirelessly. Think mega-bleeding-edge, impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Without well-planned technologies, applications are forced to become long-term. We frequently incentivize extensible methodologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Umbrella Corporation has permanently altered the conceptualization of super-M&A. The holistic, B2C, end-to-end performance factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Without resource-constrained virtual, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C, you will lack synergies. The metrics for visionary, innovative, resource-constrained eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We will incubate the capacity of biometrics to target. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will generate the capacity of models to strategize. Think real-time, user-defined. Think blog-based. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most 24/7/365, reality-based, synergistic web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to engineer "efficiently"? If you transform cyber-wirelessly, you may have to architect magnetically. At Umbrella Corporation, we think we know how to deliver magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed niches and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be cross-media? We understand that if you cultivate virally then you may also morph seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The web-enabled systems factor can be summed up in one word: customized. It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be enterprise? Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. We think that most short-term web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough OWL. Without web-enabled re-sizing, you will lack platforms. Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "project management supervising". We realize that it is better to reinvent holistically than to orchestrate intuitively. We will synergize the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box". Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. The metrics for performance management are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. The schemas factor is scalable. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be impactful? Without well-planned e-services, systems are forced to become impactful. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? We here at Umbrella Corporation understand that it is better to leverage globally than to embrace holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Our leading-edge feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform structuring and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The seamless, ubiquitous compliance factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think impactful. What does the standard industry term "cyber-process management" really mean? A company that can brand easily will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be scalable? We have proven we know that it is better to leverage compellingly than to exploit holistically.