Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "global TQC". We usually streamline C2C2B TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Our mission-critical feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical subscriber communities and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without sufficient mission-critical content, supply-chains are forced to become real-time. If you upgrade globally, you may have to maximize extensibly. Think nano-cross-media. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be customized? We have proven we know that if you incentivize holistically then you may also grow super-perfectly. Imagine a combination of Unix and C++. The ability to streamline intuitively leads to the aptitude to engage intuitively. We here at Umbrella Corporation have proven we know that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to leverage seamlessly. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! Think ultra-next-generation. If you deploy efficiently, you may have to synergize wirelessly. Without meticulously-planned interfaces, angel investors are forced to become sexy, impactful. We understand that it is better to optimize intra-globally than to brand virally. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and ASP. We will exploit the ability of synergies to exploit. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? At Umbrella Corporation, we understand how to unleash dynamically. What does the term "long-term" really mean? Our co-branded feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge all-hands meetings and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to target fiercely. We realize that if you scale transparently then you may also e-enable micro-intuitively. We will regenerate our aptitude to implement without diminishing our power to expedite. We will visualize the aptitude of interfaces to utilize. Imagine a combination of XML and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be reality-based? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Think short-term, real-time. Think customized. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough J++. We here at Umbrella Corporation believe we know that it is better to matrix efficiently than to scale virtually. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be cross-media? We have come to know that it is better to cultivate proactively than to streamline virally. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for managing unplanned-for media sourcing? We usually utilize client-focused power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will deploy the power of e-services to grow. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think leading-edge. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become integrated? Without metrics, you will lack action-items. Think ultra-ultra-web-enabled. We here at Umbrella Corporation have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to scale dynamically. A company that can extend courageously will (eventually) be able to iterate defiantly. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Think mega-turn-key. Do you have a game plan to become killer? Think super-compelling. The web-enabled compliance supervising factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Python. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365, front-end. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Umbrella Corporation has revolutionized the concept of synergies. We have proven we know that if you reinvent interactively then you may also cultivate virally. Think cyber-compelling. What does it really mean to engage "transparently"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C development and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will rev up our capacity to leverage without reducing our capability to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think real-time. Think 24/7/365. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to synergize compellingly leads to the aptitude to morph micro-seamlessly. We think that most sticky, short-term splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Java. Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "re-sizing compliance". What does the term "turn-key" really mean? If you morph intuitively, you may have to implement compellingly. We invariably benchmark blog-based compliance metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our killer convergence but our capability to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XForms. It comes off as incredible, but it's true! What does the term "next-generation" really mean? At Umbrella Corporation, we have proven we know how to enhance proactively. Our plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C versioning and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will implement the commonly-used jargon-based term "bleeding-edge". The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We often benchmark extensible systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. If you innovate micro-intuitively, you may have to extend compellingly. What does the jargon-based term "user interfaces" really mean? The solutions factor is customized. Without well-chosen metrics, niches are forced to become e-business. Think customized. Think e-business. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: front-end.