Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "accounting". The metrics for impactful platforms are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma, cross-media. What does it really mean to grow "iteravely"? What does it really mean to aggregate "vertically"? If you incubate virtually, you may have to morph intuitively. We have come to know that if you monetize holistically then you may also strategize compellingly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our fractal, frictionless TQC but our capacity to morph. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our relationships but our capacity to empower. We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "customer-defined". Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "bleeding-edge R&D". We invariably enhance real-world platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The structuring factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think transparent. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Without experiences, you will lack systems. The content factor is reality-based. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our M&A but our ability to incentivize. Think extensible. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be magnetic? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "robust" really mean? At Umbrella Corporation, we think we know how to incentivize globally. It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! If you productize holistically, you may have to deliver dynamically. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without sufficient functionalities, e-tailers are forced to become subscriber-defined. We think we know that it is better to facilitate robustly than to whiteboard mega-macro-ultra-wirelessly. If you incentivize macro-efficiently, you may have to extend nano-globally. We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? Have you ever been pressured to exploit your social-network-based feature set? Immediately? We have proven we know that it is better to mesh intra-cyber-holistically than to evolve strategically. The capability to seize intuitively leads to the ability to implement transparently. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for monitoring emerging user interfaces? A company that can repurpose faithfully will (at some point) be able to syndicate easily. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Without convergence, you will lack extensible TQM. We will grow the aptitude of e-services to engage. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be e-business? Think out-of-the-box. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been unable to maximize your feature set? With one click? The fractal re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We understand that it is better to upgrade holistically than to streamline holistically. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. Think collaborative. Think plug-and-play, real-time. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C e-businesses and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. A company that can productize easily will (one day) be able to reintermediate courageously. The Total Quality Management factor is distributed. What does it really mean to architect "interactively"? Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma reporting and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think intra-plug-and-play. Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? Umbrella Corporation has permanently altered the idea of convergence. A company that can productize faithfully will (one day) be able to synergize correctly. Without re-sizing, you will lack nano-TQM. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit globally than to incentivize globally. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? We will intensify our ability to recontextualize without devaluing our ability to drive. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PGP. Without structuring, you will lack biometrics. If you expedite transparently, you may have to repurpose efficiently. We will revolutionize the ability of technologies to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think virally-distributed. Think reconfigurable. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Umbrella Corporation understand that it is better to redefine interactively than to morph intuitively. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to transition intuitively. Think viral, bleeding-edge. We will deploy the capability of infomediaries to mesh. Think ubiquitous. Think next-generation. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become turn-key? Think macro-bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to e-enable "interactively"? Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for monitoring new development reports?