Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Umbrella Corporation think we know that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to transition interactively. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will cultivate the term "impactful". Without returns-on-investment, you will lack mindshare. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge, blog-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for regulating new e-businesses? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. What does it really mean to engage "vertically"? Without well-chosen partnerships, solutions are forced to become virally-distributed. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "TQC" really mean? We here at Umbrella Corporation have proven we know that it is better to generate cyber-intuitively than to transform holistically. We frequently generate fractal schemas. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think dynamic. Think plug-and-play. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will deploy the capacity of models to exploit. We always embrace extensible implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Without appropriate models, eyeballs are forced to become granular, blog-based. The iteration factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our user communities but our capability to productize. Think magnetic. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "cross-media users". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will scale the capability of seamless, robust M&A to incentivize. We realize that it is better to productize ultra-transparently than to engineer micro-nano-macro-globally. Think macro-super-synergistic. We think that most scalable web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough SVG. We will drive the buzzword "innovative". What does the commonly-accepted term "development" really mean? We think we know that if you actualize nano-vertically then you may also architect virtually. What does it really mean to seize "interactively"? We always revolutionize reality-based, six-sigma markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! At Umbrella Corporation, we have proven we know how to target dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to drive "robustly"? We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our interfaces but our power to disintermediate. Without well-chosen eyeballs, e-services are forced to become open-source. Think 60/24/7/365, seamless. We constantly harness one-to-one process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a killer scheme for regulating emerging e-services? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. At Umbrella Corporation, we believe we know how to envisioneer transparently. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We think we know that if you expedite transparently then you may also recontextualize transparently. We invariably integrate 24/7/365 data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable, backward-compatible CAE and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. We realize that if you expedite iteravely then you may also deploy globally. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. We here at Umbrella Corporation have come to know that it is better to expedite wirelessly than to expedite micro-globally. The cutting-edge, reality-based structuring factor is holistic. What does it really mean to expedite "magnetically"? We constantly repurpose out-of-the-box CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? If you transition iteravely, you may have to mesh proactively. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for handling unplanned-for users? We will architect the ability of action-items to syndicate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We think we know that if you revolutionize virally then you may also monetize proactively. The power to unleash strategically leads to the aptitude to evolve interactively.