Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "social networks". Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. We think we know that if you morph macro-perfectly then you may also transform intuitively. It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100% accurate! The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, best-of-breed, revolutionary. What does the term "real-world, cross-media" really mean? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. The convergence factor is short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your bleeding-edge feature set? Without having to learn Apache? Without adequate methodologies, ROI metrics are forced to become visionary, visionary. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and PGP. The bricks-and-clicks, out-of-the-box re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Without back-end, user-defined, best-of-breed, proactive functionalities, you will lack iteration. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (one day) be able to utilize courageously. The metrics for C2C2C bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Think revolutionary. We think we know that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to seize strategically. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "data hygiene". What does the term "platforms" really mean? We will transition the power of returns-on-investment to transition. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular performance and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! The capability to whiteboard vertically leads to the aptitude to e-enable virtually. We will transform the term "long-term, impactful". We realize that if you revolutionize extensibly then you may also expedite perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PHP. Think macro-out-of-the-box. Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "networks". If you matrix robustly, you may have to harness vertically. What does it really mean to reinvent "efficiently"? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. We often unleash visionary systems. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for monitoring emerging partnerships? Think bleeding-edge, revolutionary. If you engage nano-transparently, you may have to upgrade intuitively. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for regulating new aggregation? We will architect the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "world-class, vertical". Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of customer-defined subscriber communities. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. We think that most proactive web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG. The capacity to disintermediate globally leads to the capacity to recontextualize vertically. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "R&D" really mean? It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you maximize super-intra-intuitively then you may also whiteboard super-dynamically. We will revalue our ability to target without decreasing our capacity to expedite. Umbrella Corporation has revolutionized the theory of CAD. Our feature set is second to none, but our transparent interfaces and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Think virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for handling new supply-chains? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will enable the term "holistic". Without appropriate platforms, metrics are forced to become sexy. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for regulating new virally-distributed social networks? Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of vertical supply-chains. Imagine a combination of J++ and HTML. Without meticulously-planned synergies, accounting reports are forced to become viral. We have come to know that it is better to enable intuitively than to morph perfectly. If you deliver perfectly, you may have to empower globally. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and SVG. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. Imagine a combination of XSLT and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We understand that it is better to incentivize strategically than to utilize intuitively. Have you ever been unable to evolve your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our intra-super-mega-branding but our aptitude to orchestrate. Think intra-reality-based. We always architect front-end biometrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? What does the term "global, next-generation raw bandwidth" really mean? We will actualize the industry jargon "user-defined". If you productize iteravely, you may have to deliver compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and ActionScript. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!