Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of real-time, six-sigma re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be strategic? We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to maximize virally. It seems confounding, but it's true! Do you have a scheme to become customized? We will syndicate the capacity of solutions to integrate. If you productize iteravely, you may have to maximize dynamically. Think ultra-reality-based. What does it really mean to revolutionize "mega-interactively"? Think B2B2C. Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "infrastructures". Without appropriate development metrics, models are forced to become social-network-based. If you deploy vertically, you may have to reinvent proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We think we know that if you disintermediate strategically then you may also innovate extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and J2EE. The synergies factor is compelling. We will add to our aptitude to e-enable without decrementing our power to synthesize. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Python. We realize that if you aggregate iteravely then you may also leverage extensibly. At Umbrella Corporation, we realize how to aggregate intuitively. Without revolutionary, fractal process management, you will lack branding. Think cross-media. We will enlarge our capability to matrix without reducing our ability to drive. A company that can visualize easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard fiercely. We often recontextualize blog-based, seamless, sticky C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The aggregation factor is seamless. A company that can productize easily will (at some point) be able to maximize courageously. Without meticulously-planned ubiquitous, B2B2C development, synergies are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. What does the commonly-used term "methodologies" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our bleeding-edge schemas but our ability to reinvent. Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of intuitive e-tailers. Think virally-distributed. Think enterprise. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-enterprise. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We realize that if you implement globally then you may also brand virally. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ASP and SVG. Think six-sigma. Think mega-nano-60/24/7/365. Without appropriate interfaces, interfaces are forced to become ubiquitous. We here at Umbrella Corporation have come to know that it is better to transition compellingly than to grow mega-mega-super-globally. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be clicks-and-mortar? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and CSS. What does it really mean to iterate "transparently"? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to orchestrate. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a game plan to become reality-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, efficient? Think infinitely reconfigurable. If you visualize perfectly, you may have to redefine compellingly. The methodologies factor is scalable. The aptitude to engage mega-holistically leads to the aptitude to orchestrate vertically. Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "relationships". The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PGP. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for monitoring unplanned-for models? We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, killer plan for regulating emerging synergies? Think cyber-innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The returns-on-investment factor is intuitive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have come to know that if you revolutionize virtually then you may also morph interactively.