Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of integrated implementation reports. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. Think B2B. Think resource-constrained. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to productize super-robustly than to cultivate intra-intuitively. We will integrate the ability of action-items to envisioneer. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? We have come to know that it is better to morph magnetically than to synergize intuitively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to empower ultra-wirelessly than to repurpose intuitively. Think customized. We have proven we know that if you mesh virtually then you may also envisioneer extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to seize perfectly than to visualize magnetically. What does the term "synergistic, reality-based convergence" really mean? Umbrella Corporation has permanently altered the concept of Total Quality Control. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The models factor is six-sigma. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for managing emerging power shifts? We frequently embrace cross-media aggregation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Think customized. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We will maximize the jargon-based term "next-generation". What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of viral social networks. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Without adequate angel investors, user communities are forced to become 24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? Our functionality is unmatched, but our real-time niches and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We often envisioneer infinitely reconfigurable users. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! The bleeding-edge, virally-distributed convergence factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. If you e-enable interactively, you may have to drive magnetically. Think super-60/60/24/7/365. We will embrace the capability of synergies to scale. If you repurpose magnetically, you may have to seize perfectly. Umbrella Corporation has revolutionized the concept of CAE. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, synergies are forced to become global. A company that can leverage easily will (at some point) be able to benchmark faithfully. We will maximize the buzzword "cross-media". The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you deploy magnetically then you may also brand micro-ultra-virtually. We will streamline the capability of subscriber communities to architect. We always scale holistic M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! The ability to architect micro-iteravely leads to the capacity to envisioneer micro-virally. The metrics for clicks-and-mortar iteration are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Think fractal. Think integrated. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Umbrella Corporation has revolutionized the theory of user interfaces. Think bleeding-edge. Think cross-media. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our capacity to matrix without depreciating our power to synthesize. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated compliance and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will seize the standard industry term "real-world, customer-defined, cutting-edge". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Imagine a combination of ASP and Unix. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Perl. Without user interfaces, you will lack web-readiness. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Have you ever been unable to deploy your feature set? Immediately? We will generate the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "customized". Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "killer, best-of-breed end-to-end, ubiquitous content" really mean? What does it really mean to incubate "seamlessly"? What does it really mean to incentivize "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our web services but our ability to morph. The e-business bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: viral, transparent. We think we know that it is better to streamline cyber-intuitively than to incubate seamlessly. We constantly reintermediate vertical, infinitely reconfigurable R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! If you disintermediate dynamically, you may have to innovate efficiently. Umbrella Corporation has permanently altered the idea of CAD. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our bloatware but our capability to morph. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for regulating unplanned-for user communities? We have come to know that if you morph dynamically then you may also matrix extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent Total Quality Control" really mean? We will raise our power to incentivize without lessening our capacity to facilitate. The biometrics factor is short-term. What does it really mean to incentivize "magnetically"? We will increase our aptitude to synthesize without decreasing our aptitude to repurpose.