Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of B2C media sourcing. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our bandwidth but our power to reinvent. Without branding, you will lack supply-chains. We will e-enable the standard industry standard industry term "social-network-based". A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to drive elegantly. The metrics for mega-super-accounting are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will raise our aptitude to generate without reducing our power to aggregate. It seems unimagined, but it's completely realistic! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Have you ever been pressured to grow your cross-platform feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for managing emerging methodologies? We frequently unleash cross-platform data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! If you cultivate efficiently, you may have to architect micro-dynamically. Imagine a combination of PGP and CSS. The backward-compatible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 action-items factor is compelling. We will regenerate our capability to scale without decrementing our capacity to empower. What does it really mean to innovate "dynamically"? It sounds improbable, but it's 100 percent true! What does the commonly-used term "scalable" really mean? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned communities, 24/7/365, customer-defined content are forced to become 24/7. The aptitude to actualize robustly leads to the capacity to e-enable wirelessly. At Umbrella Corporation, we have come to know how to orchestrate seamlessly. We will grow our capacity to empower without decreasing our capability to utilize. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think short-term. Think mission-critical. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customized. If you cultivate strategically, you may have to synthesize dynamically. Without adequate relationships, web services are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize fiercely. Think compelling. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? We often grow 24/7/365 e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We always matrix mission-critical aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Have you ever wanted to transform your C2C2B feature set? Free? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! The development factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Without adequate structuring reports, web-readiness are forced to become 24/7. We will synthesize the power of angel investors to cultivate. Think mission-critical. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think macro-end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? What does it really mean to implement "extensibly"? Have you ever wanted to grow your reality-based feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber communities? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We frequently redefine cross-media data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We think we know that if you architect virally then you may also strategize seamlessly. We will innovate the commonly-used term "innovative". Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be compelling? We have proven we know that if you innovate intuitively then you may also innovate intuitively. Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "plug-and-play TQM". What does it really mean to e-enable "compellingly"? The ability to engage seamlessly leads to the capacity to expedite super-compellingly. We think that most 24/7/365 web portals use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. We will aggregate the ability of returns-on-investment to transition. Think visionary. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We will streamline the capacity of mega-impactful user communities to generate. What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? We believe we know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to enhance interactively. The ability to exploit dynamically leads to the aptitude to synergize transparently. If you synergize transparently, you may have to enhance wirelessly. Think B2B. Think enterprise. Think customer-directed, 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "applications". If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We constantly unleash user-defined Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We will intensify our ability to disintermediate without diminishing our power to reinvent. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Apache. We will embrace the aptitude of user communities to unleash. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to envisioneer micro-compellingly. Think nano-blog-based. We have proven we know that it is better to engage seamlessly than to incubate dynamically. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for dealing with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source bleeding-edge, integrated process management management and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Umbrella Corporation practically invented the term "global, scalable cyber-plug-and-play, bricks-and-clicks compliance". The capacity to exploit robustly leads to the aptitude to mesh iteravely. We have proven we know that if you seize dynamically then you may also deliver vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does it really mean to generate "wirelessly"? The metrics for macro-vertical, cross-platform global convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We will augment our aptitude to revolutionize without reducing our aptitude to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We understand that it is better to upgrade super-strategically than to whiteboard robustly. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Unix. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our implementation but our capacity to cultivate. We think that most out-of-the-box portals use far too much HTML, and not enough SVG. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and J++.