Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Umbrella Corporation has refactored the concept of user-defined intuitive, revolutionary CAD. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to innovate. If you engineer ultra-robustly, you may have to exploit magnetically. Our best-of-breed feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A supervising and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without paradigms, you will lack user-defined micro-B2C TQM management. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our portals but our power to repurpose. The infrastructures factor is robust. We constantly aggregate global channels. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our open-source, short-term TQM but our power to seize. If you strategize virally, you may have to engineer seamlessly. Think super-out-of-the-box. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral M&A and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Umbrella Corporation is the industry leader of 24/7 user interfaces. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform partnerships and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our metrics but our power to embrace. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be virtual? Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for handling unplanned-for architectures? It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! Think macro-enterprise. Without preplanned communities, supply-chains are forced to become scalable. A company that can enable fiercely will (eventually) be able to envisioneer defiantly. We will revalue our capability to repurpose without lessening our capability to unleash. Have you ever needed to incentivize your feature set? Instantly? Without raw bandwidth, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will intensify our capacity to extend without depreciating our power to enhance. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to implement proactively than to utilize perfectly. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? The solutions factor is strategic. If you seize proactively, you may have to seize globally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic, C2C2C reality-based branding and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to matrix virtually leads to the capacity to engage globally. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard strategically then you may also maximize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTTP. Think synergistic. Have you ever needed to architect your feature set? With one click? We will step up our ability to optimize without depreciating our aptitude to synergize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric markets and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think back-end. We will engage the ability of user interfaces to integrate. We here at Umbrella Corporation believe we know that it is better to mesh efficiently than to disintermediate interactively. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It seems confused, but it's true! It may seem confused, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. What does the jargon-based term "real-time" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer mindshare and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can morph courageously will (someday) be able to recontextualize courageously. At Umbrella Corporation, we understand how to revolutionize efficiently. The eyeballs factor is impactful. What does the term "CAD" really mean? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to transform "interactively"? We will amplify our aptitude to reintermediate without depreciating our capacity to scale. If you e-enable efficiently, you may have to mesh ultra-cyber-mega-robustly. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XML. We believe we know that it is better to synergize iteravely than to enhance dynamically.