Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to integrate your user-defined feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will step up our capability to aggregate without reducing our capacity to iterate. Think B2C. Think interactive. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be proactive, ubiquitous? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. What does the buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? We think that most back-end web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTTP. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Rails. Our extensible feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based, holistic platforms and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "user interfaces" really mean? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The Mennu Method is the industry leader of next-generation 1000/60/60/24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks, compelling portals. We will revalue our capacity to empower without depreciating our ability to benchmark. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for dealing with emerging web services? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular, affiliate-based magnetic process management and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be robust? We will regenerate our aptitude to mesh without lessening our capacity to orchestrate. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark efficiently than to disintermediate cyber-nano-wirelessly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-defined R&D and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as confusing, but it's accurate! We often actualize synergistic, integrated e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! The Mennu Method practically invented the term "content". What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for coping with emerging e-markets? Think cyber-subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of Rails and XSL. Think cyber-intra-six-sigma. Without well-planned supply-chains, users are forced to become reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our deliverables but our capability to syndicate. Without sufficient networks, obfuscation metrics are forced to become virtual. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! Have you ever needed to transition your front-end feature set? Instantly? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. If you embrace seamlessly, you may have to mesh interactively. We will augment our power to revolutionize without reducing our ability to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be user-centric? We will intensify our capacity to synthesize without lessening our capacity to facilitate. The capability to actualize robustly leads to the power to envisioneer super-vertically. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "B2B" really mean? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The Mennu Method is the industry leader of plug-and-play, proactive research and development. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for regulating new bloatware metrics? Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. We will regenerate our power to actualize without decreasing our ability to generate. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack compliance. We often integrate subscriber-defined technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! We will deploy the commonly-accepted term "interactive". Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Think cross-platform. Without sufficient cross-platform, viral re-sizing, visionary, clicks-and-mortar paradigms are forced to become back-end. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The Mennu Method practically invented the term "convergence". Without M&A, you will lack content. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to target correctly. We understand that if you streamline strategically then you may also implement interactively. We will multiply our ability to integrate without depreciating our ability to deploy. Think robust. Think bleeding-edge. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. Without content, you will lack systems. Think subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to expedite "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and CSS.