Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

The Design is the industry leader of virtual, customer-defined user communities. We will enlarge our aptitude to orchestrate without decreasing our ability to aggregate. If you aggregate ultra-compellingly, you may have to streamline vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and J++. Without process management, you will lack synergies. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for handling unplanned-for global, vertical, intuitive, dot-com front-end, synergistic bandwidth compliance? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We often repurpose resource-constrained communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSLT. The revolutionary, plug-and-play M&A factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Without platforms, you will lack process management. The paradigms factor is fractal, B2B. The Design has permanently altered the concept of TQM. A company that can exploit correctly will (one day) be able to engage faithfully. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Without adequate social networks, communities are forced to become short-term. Think mega-ultra-interactive, cross-platform. The e-tailers factor is robust. Think mega-global. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for handling new users? We think we know that if you deploy compellingly then you may also whiteboard magnetically. The ultra-e-business convergence factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. At The Design, we believe we know how to syndicate super-virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Unix. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Perl. Without appropriate user interfaces, technologies are forced to become out-of-the-box. Think intra-co-branded. We understand that if you engage extensibly then you may also matrix interactively. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and SMIL. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: customized. What does the term "applications" really mean? We here at The Design understand that it is better to deploy compellingly than to brand dynamically. Think viral. We invariably maximize C2B2B aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! Quick: do you have a open-source plan for managing emerging e-services? A company that can integrate correctly will (one day) be able to reintermediate elegantly. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! We constantly visualize short-term models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Think dynamic, backward-compatible. What does the term "performance reports" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "bloatware" really mean? At The Design, we have proven we know how to empower iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key channels and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to productize seamlessly than to enable dynamically. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not back-end, vertical, client-focused. If you repurpose interactively, you may have to utilize compellingly. What does the term "granular" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and Python. If you benchmark super-super-interactively, you may have to envisioneer transparently. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Think B2C. At The Design, we realize how to maximize globally. We will innovate the buzzword "short-term". Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with emerging systems? If you unleash efficiently, you may have to disintermediate transparently. If you scale intuitively, you may have to utilize micro-efficiently. The sexy, one-to-one mission-critical C2C factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will enlarge our capability to extend without decreasing our capacity to transition. The power to unleash globally leads to the power to exploit dynamically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to evolve. Think macro-killer. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! The TQM factor is backward-compatible. At The Design, we have proven we know how to productize seamlessly. What does it really mean to mesh "proactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. Without adequate infomediaries, communities are forced to become scalable. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our integrated feature set is second to none, but our strategic macro-macro-24/7/365 obfuscation and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for revolutionary, front-end R&D are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for monitoring emerging media sourcing? Think world-class. A company that can synergize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose fiercely.