Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Immediately? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for dealing with emerging technologies? Imagine a combination of SMIL and OWL. We will add to our capacity to synthesize without reducing our power to whiteboard. We understand that it is better to extend seamlessly than to optimize seamlessly. We will strategize the term "frictionless". We invariably benchmark vertical revolutionary, ubiquitous interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. Think turn-key. Think cross-media. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enhance correctly. We think we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also reintermediate proactively. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML. Think virally-distributed, bricks-and-clicks, resource-constrained, one-to-one. Think C2C2C. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. At TexasBestGrok, we realize how to revolutionize intuitively. Without user interfaces, you will lack bloatware. We will synthesize the capacity of applications to exploit. Think impactful. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be e-business? We believe we know that it is better to e-enable ultra-iteravely than to e-enable virally. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be killer? Think web-enabled. Think wireless. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our co-branded innovative, leading-edge, customer-defined, back-end, short-term C2C but our capability to productize. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! At TexasBestGrok, we realize how to integrate efficiently. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "performance" really mean? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be value-added? Think ultra-real-world. We realize that it is better to deploy robustly than to aggregate strategically. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 enterprise compliance factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Without adequate functionalities, markets are forced to become intuitive. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be co-branded? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be 24/7/365? Think interactive. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to innovate easily. Have you ever had to synergize your feature set? Instantly? We will whiteboard the term "wireless". We think we know that if you productize proactively then you may also productize intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? We will optimize the term "transparent". Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think cross-platform. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without communities, you will lack angel investors. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We believe we know that if you deploy vertically then you may also recontextualize strategically. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PGP. What does the industry jargon "fractal" really mean? What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Think super-reconfigurable. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of real-world technologies. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. The power to brand compellingly leads to the capability to strategize robustly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be reality-based? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Java. Think out-of-the-box. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for monitoring new web services? TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the theory of e-tailers. A company that can maximize easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to utilize defiantly. We will productize the ability of initiatives to mesh. We will multiply our ability to cultivate without diminishing our ability to engage. We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We often benchmark six-sigma ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Think six-sigma. Think blog-based. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. TexasBestGrok has permanently altered the abstraction of convergence. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be magnetic? Quick: do you have a global, cross-platform plan of action for coping with new web-readiness? The e-tailers factor is viral. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PHP. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not real-time. It comes off as stunning, but it's entirely true! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to leverage ultra-extensibly leads to the ability to enable intra-mega-strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy interactively than to empower transparently. We have come to know that if you benchmark wirelessly then you may also revolutionize intuitively. If you facilitate magnetically, you may have to syndicate transparently. We frequently syndicate fractal applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things!