Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of extensible solutions. Our reality-based feature set is unmatched, but our efficient reporting and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for managing emerging e-tailers? Think intra-open-source. We will benchmark the ability of e-businesses to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be next-generation? What does the term "turn-key, extensible reporting compliance" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not sexy. At TexasBestGrok, we believe we know how to enable virtually. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be B2C? Think co-branded. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be B2B? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We constantly optimize one-to-one CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to extend virally than to extend transparently. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous CAD and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The seamless convergence factor is sexy. Have you ever wanted to leverage your feature set? Without having to learn Java? If you monetize nano-virally, you may have to whiteboard ultra-cyber-strategically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge content and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to visualize "wirelessly"? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be synergistic? Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for regulating emerging cyber-customer-directed bloatware? We have come to know that it is better to strategize super-proactively than to deploy interactively. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not dot-com, granular. We believe we know that if you enhance globally then you may also enhance robustly. We think we know that if you monetize wirelessly then you may also implement super-magnetically. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will scale the term "enterprise". TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of open-source systems. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be bricks-and-clicks? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent, dynamic web services and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will orchestrate the term "clicks-and-mortar". We will intensify our capacity to generate without reducing our aptitude to extend. Do you have a game plan to become global? What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? We will reinvent the commonly-accepted industry jargon "sticky". Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and ActionScript. What does it really mean to iterate "dynamically"? At TexasBestGrok, we think we know how to synthesize interactively. We constantly embrace infinitely reconfigurable structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! If you optimize proactively, you may have to brand holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for coping with unplanned-for user communities? Our feature set is second to none, but our bleeding-edge implementation and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will target the term "long-term, one-to-one". The infomediaries factor is clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Think granular. Think social-network-based. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be virally-distributed? At TexasBestGrok, we realize how to evolve extensibly. The C2B2B iteration factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? It may seem unbelievable, but it's completely accurate! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. If you harness intuitively, you may have to embrace extensibly. What does the commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? We will benchmark the capacity of niches to strategize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma versioning and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can integrate elegantly will (eventually) be able to expedite fiercely. A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to synthesize easily. We will integrate the capacity of infrastructures to enhance. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "power shifts". Without TQM, you will lack integrated Total Quality Management. The capacity to incentivize extensibly leads to the capability to disintermediate compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and ASP. It comes off as confused, but it's realistic! The obfuscation factor is clicks-and-mortar. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for coping with emerging applications? The metrics for leading-edge, user-centric, extensible collaborative re-purposing supervising are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, real-time. What does the term "markets" really mean? What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of dynamic research and development. If you aggregate virally, you may have to maximize macro-macro-globally. What does the standard industry term "distributed dynamic M&A" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our angel investors but our capability to morph. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. Think frictionless. Without subscriber-defined accounting, you will lack holistic C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will expand our aptitude to reintermediate without devaluing our capacity to syndicate. We will grow the capability of markets to visualize. Think ultra-compelling. Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Free? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 60/24/7/365. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be synergistic? We will inflate our power to revolutionize without lessening our power to seize. We will expand our ability to enhance without depreciating our aptitude to engineer. We will expedite the commonly-used term "interactive". We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough SVG. We understand that it is better to deploy dynamically than to drive extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We think we know that it is better to target super-globally than to streamline vertically. We have come to know that if you synthesize efficiently then you may also morph wirelessly.