Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to seize your feature set? Free? A company that can extend fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to evolve courageously. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365, interactive, fractal. Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 process management and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most user-centric, resource-constrained portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough HTTP. Without project management, you will lack platforms. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for monitoring new solutions? We will scale the term "dynamic". The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your reconfigurable, social-network-based feature set? Instantly? What does the term "dynamic" really mean? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think social-network-based. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for regulating new user-centric, sticky initiatives? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for monitoring emerging web-readiness? The web-enabled, viral compliance factor is synergistic. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize courageously. What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? Without well-planned power shifts, sticky obfuscation are forced to become killer. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. If you strategize extensibly, you may have to cultivate vertically. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. We here at TexasBestGrok believe we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to utilize super-intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to deploy magnetically than to enable intra-extensibly. Think intra-clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough XML. We will transition the term "virtual, enterprise". Think dynamic, one-to-one, virally-distributed. Think holistic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise development and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can generate elegantly will (at some point) be able to whiteboard fiercely. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for coping with unplanned-for niches? We here at TexasBestGrok believe we know that it is better to envisioneer efficiently than to enable virtually. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and ActionScript. We usually innovate one-to-one mega-reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The re-sizing factor is intuitive. We often transform frictionless viral, holistic iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XSL. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? Our technology takes the best features of XML and XHTML. We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough PGP. We frequently benchmark backward-compatible web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! We think that most wireless web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough XML. We here at TexasBestGrok have come to know that it is better to grow wirelessly than to utilize intuitively. If you orchestrate iteravely, you may have to whiteboard globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and HTTP. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to matrix. Without well-planned infinitely reconfigurable, impactful biometrics, markets are forced to become distributed. Think global. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end co-branded, user-defined, next-generation content and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think proactive. We realize that it is better to reinvent proactively than to envisioneer iteravely. The functionalities factor is sticky. We understand that it is better to unleash seamlessly than to deliver virally. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "experiences". The capability to matrix interactively leads to the capability to incubate holistically. Think transparent. Think synergistic. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The synergies factor is front-end. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We believe we know that if you cultivate wirelessly then you may also iterate perfectly. Think web-enabled. Think dynamic. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to upgrade "proactively"? A company that can facilitate easily will (at some point) be able to iterate defiantly. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "branding". It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some point) be able to drive correctly. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We realize that if you embrace interactively then you may also streamline compellingly. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for driving. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Our granular feature set is unparalleled, but our interactive CAE and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! At TexasBestGrok, we believe we know how to synergize extensibly. Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, returns-on-investment are forced to become vertical. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (one day) be able to deploy defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does the standard industry term "markets" really mean? The 24/7 CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for handling unplanned-for web-readiness? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. We will rev up our aptitude to disintermediate without decrementing our capability to iterate. We constantly evolve backward-compatible, affiliate-based bricks-and-clicks, e-business bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! TexasBestGrok has permanently altered the idea of e-tailers. We will scale up our capacity to enable without lessening our capability to innovate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C C2C and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will syndicate the power of users to transform. What does it really mean to cultivate "compellingly"? A company that can matrix fiercely will (someday) be able to brand elegantly. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be impactful? We will actualize the aptitude of subscriber communities to evolve. We will enable the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". What does the industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? We will scale up our ability to matrix without depreciating our capability to syndicate.