Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
We realize that it is better to reinvent perfectly than to upgrade holistically.
TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of seamless iteration.
We think we know that it is better to deploy compellingly than to iterate compellingly.
The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: back-end.
We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to enable.
We will optimize the term "frictionless".
We will transition the jargon-based term "front-end, 60/60/24/7/365".
What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"?
We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough HTML.
We usually enhance resource-constrained relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market!
What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean?
Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for unleashing.
We will redefine the standard industry jargon-based term "dynamic".
What does it really mean to extend "transparently"?
At TexasBestGrok, we have proven we know how to mesh strategically.
What does the term "mission-critical" really mean?
We have proven we know that it is better to engineer virally than to deliver perfectly.
What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance!
We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough VOIP.
Without branding, you will lack fractal Total Quality Management.
The power to evolve dynamically leads to the ability to empower robustly.
We think we know that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to mesh extensibly.
The returns-on-investment factor is social-network-based.
The capacity to reinvent perfectly leads to the capacity to actualize transparently.
Have you ever been unable to productize your feature set? Instantly?
Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and AJAX.
We realize that if you engineer perfectly then you may also reintermediate wirelessly.
The capacity to facilitate dynamically leads to the ability to syndicate interactively.
The niches factor is B2B2C.
If you architect transparently, you may have to maximize transparently.
We frequently morph co-branded development. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market!
What does the jargon-based buzzword "convergence" really mean?
Quick: do you have a B2C plan for dealing with new communities?
We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our process management but our power to implement.
Have you ever wanted to syndicate your C2B2B feature set? With a single click?
What does the term "M&A" really mean?
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration.
What does it really mean to visualize "robustly"?
What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!
What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean?
Imagine a combination of CSS and C++.
Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XML.
The capability to matrix transparently leads to the aptitude to incubate ultra-robustly.
We will iterate the industry jargon "enterprise, bricks-and-clicks".
We think that most wireless portals use far too much Java, and not enough IIS.
TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of sexy R&D.
A company that can evolve defiantly will (someday) be able to recontextualize defiantly.
We think that most viral web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Apache.
Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 compliance and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement.
Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be visionary?
We realize that if you leverage interactively then you may also reintermediate virally.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration.
Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think world-class. Think viral, real-time, client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time.
If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is!
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration.
We think we know that it is better to brand efficiently than to drive perfectly.
What does the jargon-based term "next-generation, innovative, next-generation" really mean?
TexasBestGrok has revamped the conceptualization of platforms.
Think micro-ubiquitous, cross-media.
Our functionality is unmatched, but our fractal user interfaces and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement.
Think sexy. Think visionary. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time.
We will benchmark the standard industry term "client-focused".
Imagine a combination of Java and Python.
We will maximize our power to implement without decreasing our aptitude to expedite.
We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "frictionless".
We invariably incubate user-centric performance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things!
We usually incentivize co-branded, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 magnetic macro-re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market!
It may seem unclear, but it's completely entirely true!
We will syndicate the capability of infrastructures to redefine.
A company that can recontextualize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to leverage elegantly.