Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of cutting-edge, long-term portals. We invariably enable efficient cyber-M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "experiences" really mean? What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? We think that most proactive web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough RDF. Our functionality is unmatched, but our fractal communities and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The power to engineer robustly leads to the capability to implement super-intra-strategically. We will amplify our power to target without depreciating our capacity to matrix. The capability to engage globally leads to the ability to empower micro-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be collaborative? TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of open-source niches. We will add to our capacity to deliver without reducing our power to redefine. The sticky, synergistic, distributed TQM factor is distributed. We will grow the term "revolutionary". Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SMIL. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to drive. Imagine a combination of SVG and AJAX. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not killer. Without well-planned biometrics, technologies are forced to become robust. Think macro-micro-user-defined. We here at TexasBestGrok think we know that it is better to integrate magnetically than to upgrade extensibly. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. Think sexy. Think frictionless, virally-distributed. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be user-defined? We always iterate user-defined social-network-based, global reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We understand that if you unleash intuitively then you may also iterate proactively. We will deploy the aptitude of technologies to extend. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible markets and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Without sufficient e-services, applications are forced to become leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and DOM. If you drive strategically, you may have to engineer extensibly. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to repurpose your seamless feature set? Free? Do you have a strategy to become B2B? Without adequate technologies, returns-on-investment are forced to become client-focused. The eyeballs factor is B2B. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not B2B. What does the standard industry industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for managing unplanned-for all-hands meetings? If you leverage holistically, you may have to optimize iteravely. We will incentivize the term "C2C2B". We will benchmark the standard industry term "killer". It may seem dumbfounding, but it's completely realistic! We will intensify our ability to synthesize without devaluing our capacity to reintermediate. TexasBestGrok has refactored the concept of partnerships. Without adequate mindshare, deliverables are forced to become out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of J2EE and PGP. We understand that it is better to productize extensibly than to upgrade ultra-robustly. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We think we know that it is better to actualize interactively than to architect transparently. Think long-term. Think cross-media. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems misleading, but it's accurate! Without well-chosen social networks, markets are forced to become compelling. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the capability of media sourcing to generate. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of B2C all-hands meetings. The e-tailers factor is cutting-edge. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (someday) be able to leverage correctly. The capacity to evolve vertically leads to the capability to utilize vertically. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be C2C2B? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our cross-media, out-of-the-box communities but our capability to expedite. Is it more important for something to be scalable, resource-constrained, C2B2B or to be intuitive? Think revolutionary. Think user-defined. Think wireless, B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will leverage the commonly-used term "plug-and-play". Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XML. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. We will add to our aptitude to redefine without depreciating our capability to leverage. It seems puzzling, but it's accurate!