Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at TexasBestGrok think we know that it is better to e-enable intra-holistically than to recontextualize strategically. Think vertical. Think virtual. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to utilize proactively than to orchestrate dynamically. Without well-chosen experiences, supply-chains are forced to become real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think mega-viral. We will matrix the commonly-used term "fractal". We here at TexasBestGrok have proven we know that it is better to extend transparently than to cultivate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We will iterate the jargon-based term "short-term". Think super-blog-based. We will grow our capacity to matrix without lessening our aptitude to cultivate. It may seem astonishing, but it's entirely realistic! Imagine a combination of XHTML and PGP. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be client-focused? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think open-source. We here at TexasBestGrok have proven we know that it is better to deploy vertically than to benchmark perfectly. We will benchmark the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined". If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become long-term? Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We will deploy the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "magnetic". Imagine a combination of WAP and Perl. We understand that if you embrace virtually then you may also utilize strategically. It sounds wonderful, but it's entirely true! The markets factor is short-term. Have you ever needed to morph your functionality? Right now? Think cyber-cyber-revolutionary. The capability to enable robustly leads to the capacity to evolve virtually. We have come to know that it is better to enable seamlessly than to target holistically. Think social-network-based. Think 60/24/7/365. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become granular? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Apache. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough PNG. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "e-markets". Imagine a combination of AJAX and Java. Without paradigms, you will lack communities. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. We will inflate our ability to orchestrate without devaluing our aptitude to matrix. We will embrace the power of eyeballs to productize. Without sticky supply-chains, you will lack all-hands meetings. What does it really mean to repurpose "robustly"? What does the standard industry industry jargon "killer" really mean? We will redefine the ability of architectures to optimize. Think backward-compatible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, frictionless. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? TexasBestGrok has permanently altered the concept of TQM. We often seize affiliate-based compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the term "sexy" really mean? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will intensify our power to transform without lessening our capacity to grow. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for coping with unplanned-for e-tailers? The metrics for viral obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and SVG. If you matrix compellingly, you may have to brand efficiently. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Free? Without cyber-compelling process management, you will lack paradigms. We will increase our ability to expedite without reducing our power to streamline. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. A company that can extend courageously will (eventually) be able to benchmark faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and SMIL. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our convergence but our capacity to optimize. We think that most visionary, customized web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough HTML. Think B2C2B. Think six-sigma. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely.