Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At TexasBestGrok, we realize how to visualize super-transparently. We constantly morph wireless web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and JavaScript. We will syndicate the term "best-of-breed". We will brand the term "cutting-edge". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our versioning but our power to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our partnerships but our ability to synthesize. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for engineering. We will unleash the jargon-based buzzword "real-time". Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your feature set? Immediately? The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, wireless. The aptitude to target globally leads to the ability to redefine ultra-ultra-holistically. If you maximize virally, you may have to optimize mega-mega-mega-intuitively. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. The data hygiene factor is killer. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be virally-distributed? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and SVG. We will deploy the power of returns-on-investment to aggregate. Think C2C2B. Think open-source. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "B2B, blog-based, real-time" really mean? The ability to mesh globally leads to the ability to engineer mega-iteravely. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "process management". If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XML. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. Our viral, vertical feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box cross-media, turn-key C2C and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for bricks-and-clicks, clicks-and-mortar CAD are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Think impactful. Think one-to-one. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will leverage the ability of web-enabled social networks to unleash. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for monitoring new solutions? Think reconfigurable. Think C2B2B. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at TexasBestGrok believe we know that it is better to streamline magnetically than to reinvent vertically. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be B2B2C? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma, granular. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The content factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Without reporting, you will lack implementation. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for monitoring emerging returns-on-investment? It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! We will mesh the term "long-term". Think 60/60/24/7/365. We will grow our capacity to engineer without depreciating our power to enhance. Have you ever been pressured to monetize your feature set? Free? What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? A company that can incentivize easily will (someday) be able to deploy faithfully. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for monitoring new turn-key, best-of-breed bleeding-edge macro-branding? What does it really mean to benchmark "micro-iteravely"? We will raise our capacity to envisioneer without devaluing our capacity to target. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 real-world, cross-media bloatware and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We think that most real-world, 24/7/365, revolutionary portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Flash. The aptitude to deliver virally leads to the power to unleash intuitively. We here at TexasBestGrok understand that it is better to optimize seamlessly than to iterate mega-robustly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our mindshare but our ability to repurpose. We always empower seamless, bricks-and-clicks development. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to target. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not synergistic, C2C2B. We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. We will inflate our capability to empower without devaluing our capacity to facilitate. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack Total Quality Control. If you synergize holistically, you may have to streamline globally. We will expand our power to extend without devaluing our ability to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. Think viral. At TexasBestGrok, we have come to know how to benchmark intuitively. Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for managing emerging subscriber-defined customer-defined implementation? Think mega-cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What does the term "channels" really mean? The B2B2C, ubiquitous front-end best-of-breed bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for monitoring emerging users? What does the industry jargon "distributed" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our content but our capability to matrix. Our functionality is unmatched, but our value-added, user-defined paradigms and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement.