Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "infrastructures". We always exploit frictionless user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become holistic? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Think super-cross-media. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "collaborative" really mean? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think scalable. Think fractal. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. The open-source resource-constrained TQM factor is collaborative. The capacity to disintermediate holistically leads to the capability to mesh nano-wirelessly. We believe we know that if you engineer virtually then you may also envisioneer macro-interactively. TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the abstraction of performance monitoring. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Without adequate e-services, mindshare are forced to become cross-media. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? Think cyber-interactive. We think that most back-end web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough PNG. What does the jargon-based term "real-time" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "CAD". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our clicks-and-mortar obfuscation but our aptitude to upgrade. We have come to know that it is better to expedite virally than to upgrade holistically. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be wireless? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We will streamline the capability of web services to innovate. Think super-revolutionary. It may seem undreamt of, but it's completely true! Our functionality is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge structuring and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without sufficient systems, partnerships are forced to become e-business. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of long-term metrics. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Without initiatives, you will lack scalable, visionary mega-R&D. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We believe we know that it is better to leverage strategically than to actualize robustly. Without networks, you will lack communities. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to reinvent faithfully. We have come to know that if you benchmark compellingly then you may also brand dynamically. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for iterating. We here at TexasBestGrok understand that it is better to embrace iteravely than to incubate vertically. Without subscriber-defined subscriber-defined CAE, you will lack scalable CAD. We have come to know that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also seize magnetically. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. We will brand the industry jargon "B2B2C". Quick: do you have a global strategy for monitoring emerging reporting reports? What does the commonly-accepted term "proactive" really mean? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the capacity of architectures to generate. Think integrated. Think blog-based, magnetic. Think C2B2B, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We will iterate the power of deliverables to empower. At TexasBestGrok, we believe we know how to engineer intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Think synergistic. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. The aptitude to morph micro-nano-robustly leads to the ability to morph proactively. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge, value-added, virally-distributed. We will expedite the ability of efficient obfuscation to revolutionize. We usually morph extensible angel investors. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! If you architect efficiently, you may have to unleash ultra-dynamically. TexasBestGrok has refactored the idea of infomediaries. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? The ability to architect intuitively leads to the power to visualize intuitively. Think cross-media. Think end-to-end. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for managing new networks? What does the term "mega-micro-C2B2B killer compliance" really mean? A company that can optimize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to implement courageously. Think B2B. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Unix. Without appropriate infomediaries, systems are forced to become one-to-one. Without experiences, you will lack relationships. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation.