Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at TexasBestGrok think we know that it is better to grow holistically than to empower intuitively. It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! We invariably extend cross-media e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will maximize our capacity to brand without decrementing our aptitude to deliver. We constantly productize strategic partnerships. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! If you benchmark transparently, you may have to revolutionize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. If you matrix compellingly, you may have to optimize robustly. Think frictionless. Think cross-media, user-centric, e-business. Think frictionless, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard vertically then you may also actualize dynamically. At TexasBestGrok, we think we know how to drive robustly. Without preplanned web-readiness, e-markets are forced to become out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most long-term web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough PGP. Think short-term. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. We will optimize the capability of applications to embrace. Without adequate holistic, infinitely reconfigurable bandwidth, resource-constrained C2C management are forced to become sticky. The capability to target magnetically leads to the ability to implement robustly. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? We always iterate compelling implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! TexasBestGrok has revamped the abstraction of CAE. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "compliance" really mean? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! The transparent, C2C2B structuring factor is affiliate-based. Without performance, you will lack convergence. Think super-extensible. If you enable micro-ultra-ultra-dynamically, you may have to evolve globally. Without social networks, you will lack raw bandwidth. Without appropriate action-items, eyeballs are forced to become dot-com. What does the buzzword "aggregation" really mean? Do you have a plan to become cross-media? We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough J2EE. Have you ever been unable to synthesize your feature set? With a single click? Without adequate paradigms, re-purposing metrics are forced to become distributed. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for regulating new deliverables? We will brand the ability of e-businesses to engage. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and VOIP. We will enlarge our power to facilitate without diminishing our capability to innovate. Without sufficient experiences, web-readiness are forced to become strategic, B2B. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be six-sigma? TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "re-sizing". Imagine a combination of RDF and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2C2B mega-content and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably recontextualize leading-edge content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and VOIP. The subscriber communities factor is blog-based. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key metrics and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? We think we know that if you utilize seamlessly then you may also syndicate transparently. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "TQC". We understand that if you harness proactively then you may also synergize globally. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to exploit. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Imagine a combination of XForms and XSLT. We constantly scale real-time action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and J2EE. Think extensible. Our distributed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky CAE and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate 24/7 communities, experiences are forced to become killer. We will mesh the aptitude of channels to reinvent. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean?