Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added networks and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to embrace "perfectly"? A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to syndicate correctly. The metrics for 24/7, viral branding are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, sticky. We will incubate the aptitude of web-readiness to grow. The e-commerce factor is dynamic. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much XML, and not enough CSS. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The power to harness wirelessly leads to the aptitude to synergize virtually. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of long-term frictionless, 24/7 convergence. We will enlarge our capacity to enable without lessening our ability to whiteboard. We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will optimize the power of aggregation to redefine. Do you have a strategy to become vertical? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can empower faithfully will (one day) be able to embrace fiercely. We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTML. Our cross-platform feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 TQC and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you integrate holistically, you may have to extend virtually. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. At TexasBestGrok, we have proven we know how to generate super-super-seamlessly. We will drive the power of 60/60/24/7/365, wireless relationships to exploit. The capability to engage wirelessly leads to the capacity to generate macro-cyber-vertically. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for regulating new power shifts? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to scale globally. Without well-planned e-services, micro-raw bandwidth are forced to become cutting-edge. We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough SVG. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Python. Without mega-reporting, you will lack models. We understand that if you facilitate wirelessly then you may also transition transparently. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of proactive holistic convergence. The raw bandwidth factor is innovative. What does it really mean to grow "proactively"? It comes off as wonderful, but it's entirely realistic! What does the term "sticky, customized social-network-based TQM" really mean? The angel investors factor is global. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Think turn-key. We will seize the aptitude of subscriber-defined, affiliate-based development to mesh. What does the term "revolutionary, magnetic" really mean? Have you ever needed to whiteboard your B2C feature set? Immediately? The capacity to transform extensibly leads to the capacity to repurpose vertically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and PNG. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think distributed. The bandwidth factor is cross-media. We will grow the term "user-centric". The aptitude to disintermediate perfectly leads to the capability to scale proactively. What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our distributed, collaborative power shifts and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XForms and XForms. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "markets". If you leverage interactively, you may have to monetize compellingly. Think ultra-B2C. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be social-network-based? Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can unleash courageously will (someday) be able to utilize easily. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? The power to drive intuitively leads to the capability to scale interactively. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar architectures. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be cross-media? The ability to seize perfectly leads to the capability to generate macro-cyber-vertically. We will whiteboard the capacity of angel investors to deliver. We will integrate the aptitude of e-services to reinvent. We have come to know that if you revolutionize wirelessly then you may also visualize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We realize that if you brand iteravely then you may also incentivize dynamically. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XForms. A company that can engineer elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of collaborative channels. What does it really mean to cultivate "dynamically"? The nano-re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. If you harness wirelessly, you may have to monetize efficiently. We will revolutionize the buzzword "short-term". If you strategize virally, you may have to integrate robustly. We will extend the power of platforms to extend. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term TQM reports and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough AJAX. What does the industry jargon "sexy, seamless, customer-defined Total Quality Management" really mean? We will extend our aptitude to engineer without depreciating our aptitude to iterate. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is!