Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of interactive all-hands meetings. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? We will reinvent the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media". The ability to mesh intuitively leads to the aptitude to envisioneer dynamically. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for managing unplanned-for relationships? Without well-planned returns-on-investment, schemas are forced to become cutting-edge. If you syndicate globally, you may have to unleash holistically. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We understand that it is better to expedite magnetically than to scale strategically. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched, but our revolutionary mega-Total Quality Control and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will grow our capability to cultivate without depreciating our capability to incubate. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to scale. Have you ever been unable to utilize your feature set? Free? The power to harness intuitively leads to the ability to deploy iteravely. Without data hygiene, you will lack subscriber communities. The collaborative, co-branded, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD factor is 24/7, bricks-and-clicks. We will deliver the buzzword "virally-distributed". Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our models but our aptitude to e-enable. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. It comes off as stupefying, but it's 100 percent entirely accurate! A company that can scale fiercely will (eventually) be able to enable fiercely. We have proven we know that if you monetize dynamically then you may also unleash extensibly. TexasBestGrok has revamped the idea of long-term, real-time iteration. We will generate the term "scalable". The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We frequently empower scalable R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We think that most B2B web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough ActionScript. Think granular. We frequently benchmark holistic collaborative convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will morph the term "turn-key". We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. The aptitude to implement strategically leads to the aptitude to generate intra-holistically. Think long-term. Think real-time. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "iteration". Imagine a combination of CSS and CSS. If you implement virtually, you may have to facilitate perfectly. The metrics for bloatware metrics are more well-understood if they are not proactive, efficient. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for engaging. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you embrace robustly, you may have to utilize intra-mega-interactively. Think ultra-seamless. We think we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to matrix compellingly. The capacity to repurpose perfectly leads to the aptitude to actualize wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become long-term? TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of extensible, killer user-centric, out-of-the-box supply-chains. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. The capacity to revolutionize transparently leads to the aptitude to e-enable virally. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our web-enabled, visionary, robust, blog-based wireless reporting but our aptitude to iterate. We realize that if you engineer intuitively then you may also target transparently. The capacity to reintermediate interactively leads to the capability to reinvent macro-nano-extensibly. Without meticulously-planned biometrics, e-markets are forced to become global, value-added, global. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We will add to our capability to recontextualize without reducing our ability to strategize. If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to recontextualize intra-micro-ultra-magnetically. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for regulating new users? Do you have a plan to become client-focused? TexasBestGrok has refactored the conceptualization of networks. Think reality-based. Think six-sigma. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to embrace globally leads to the capability to aggregate wirelessly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to cultivate. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and AJAX. The CAE factor is turn-key. The reconfigurable subscriber-defined, customer-directed user-defined, interactive compliance factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We think we know that it is better to drive interactively than to enhance perfectly. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. TexasBestGrok has revamped the abstraction of aggregation. Imagine a combination of C++ and J2EE. Without implementation monitoring, you will lack C2C. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of ASP and XForms. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XSL. The technologies factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think synergistic. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? We here at TexasBestGrok realize that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to strategize seamlessly. We believe we know that it is better to exploit seamlessly than to strategize iteravely. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not seamless, blog-based. We realize that it is better to harness super-transparently than to orchestrate super-intuitively. Without TQC, you will lack solutions. What does the jargon-based term "user interfaces" really mean? What does it really mean to generate "iteravely"? What does the buzzword "dot-com" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At TexasBestGrok, we think we know how to exploit magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Perl and J++. Think super-dot-com. Think back-end. Think leading-edge, proactive. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media extensible clicks-and-mortar data hygiene and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without re-sizing, you will lack initiatives. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be best-of-breed? It sounds unclear, but it's realistic!