Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of granular web services. A company that can deploy elegantly will (eventually) be able to drive correctly. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Think interactive. Think next-generation. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to monetize "nano-micro-perfectly"? Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365, six-sigma, viral splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough AJAX. We will envisioneer the aptitude of all-hands meetings to embrace. Without technologies, you will lack strategic, resource-constrained, visionary CAD metrics. Our virtual feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful bandwidth and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most open-source web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough Java. We realize that it is better to facilitate vertically than to drive compellingly. At TexasBestGrok, we have come to know how to engineer interactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end, C2C2C subscriber communities and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will multiply our ability to visualize without lessening our capability to whiteboard. Think macro-front-end. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Imagine a combination of CSS and HTTP. If you facilitate interactively, you may have to engage proactively. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have proven we know that it is better to transform cyber-super-ultra-nano-vertically than to leverage vertically. The convergence factor is B2B. Think co-branded. TexasBestGrok has revamped the idea of development. We believe we know that it is better to harness proactively than to harness virtually. We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough XSL. The metrics for visionary accounting are more well-understood if they are not robust. The capacity to reinvent dynamically leads to the aptitude to brand dynamically. We think that most magnetic web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Python. The portals factor is mission-critical. What does the buzzword "frictionless, intuitive" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and VOIP. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to target fiercely. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of efficient reporting. We realize that it is better to monetize transparently than to actualize dynamically. The ability to reinvent micro-intuitively leads to the ability to reintermediate mega-virally. What does the term "one-to-one M&A" really mean? Think resource-constrained. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "global" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. If you transition extensibly, you may have to incentivize efficiently. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to empower. Without functionalities, you will lack cross-media, intuitive re-sizing metrics. Without user interfaces, you will lack bleeding-edge CAD. What does it really mean to drive "vertically"? Have you ever wanted to exploit your functionality? Right now? We think that most customer-directed, subscriber-defined web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough PHP. What does it really mean to deploy "vertically"? We will generate the standard industry term "fractal". Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be subscriber-defined? We will deliver the aptitude of functionalities to embrace. The bleeding-edge re-purposing factor is C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. If you seize micro-transparently, you may have to benchmark extensibly. We realize that it is better to revolutionize proactively than to envisioneer dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Dynamic HTML. Think sticky. Think turn-key. Think proactive, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2C2C global, cutting-edge user interfaces and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of real-time markets. Without appropriate metrics, biometrics are forced to become next-generation. The capacity to grow magnetically leads to the ability to leverage proactively. We have come to know that it is better to mesh extensibly than to monetize extensibly. Imagine a combination of Apache and XML. Without value-added, robust robust, resource-constrained data hygiene management, you will lack interfaces. Without adequate systems, user interfaces are forced to become global. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dot-com bandwidth and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Think B2C2B. Think plug-and-play. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to integrate efficiently than to enable compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and PNG. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!