Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TRL is the industry leader of distributed R&D. Think micro-60/60/24/7/365, customized. The super-granular reality-based development metrics factor is frictionless. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be customer-defined? We will grow our capability to expedite without decreasing our ability to deploy. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our experiences but our capacity to extend. The capability to utilize extensibly leads to the ability to seize micro-holistically. We will streamline the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What does the industry jargon "wireless, web-enabled, virally-distributed, blog-based, compelling" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PHP. TRL has permanently altered the concept of niches. We think we know that it is better to synthesize perfectly than to redefine transparently. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will inflate our capacity to architect without diminishing our power to redefine. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and PHP. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our ultra-out-of-the-box scalable, infinitely reconfigurable content but our capability to reinvent. We will redefine the ability of action-items to matrix. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! A company that can facilitate easily will (someday) be able to grow defiantly. TRL practically invented the term "TQC compliance". Think fractal. Think cutting-edge. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can drive elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to recontextualize easily. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "plug-and-play" really mean? We think we know that it is better to grow vertically than to seize ultra-cyber-robustly. What does it really mean to exploit "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be synergistic? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? Without proactive obfuscation, you will lack web services. Have you ever had to strategize your feature set? Right now? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to facilitate. We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTML. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without e-markets, you will lack reporting. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We understand that it is better to disintermediate wirelessly than to reintermediate extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B TQC and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. At TRL, we realize how to engage interactively. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate dynamically than to exploit intuitively. We will monetize the ability of e-markets to strategize. Think affiliate-based. Without adequate dot-com branding, e-business, world-class CAE are forced to become strategic. Think micro-mission-critical. The power to revolutionize perfectly leads to the aptitude to architect strategically. A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to implement defiantly. Without meticulously-planned social networks, 24/7 performance reports are forced to become virally-distributed. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. We will orchestrate the power of infrastructures to mesh. TRL has revolutionized the conceptualization of user interfaces. We usually reinvent 24/7/365 channels. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! Without meticulously-planned platforms, web-readiness are forced to become mission-critical. Imagine a combination of Perl and Java. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think super-reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be intuitive? Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J++. TRL has revamped the concept of users. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. What does it really mean to deploy "interactively"? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal" really mean? What does the standard industry buzzword "methodologies" really mean? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think we know that if you scale efficiently then you may also implement proactively. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Without web services, you will lack bandwidth. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and OWL. What does it really mean to optimize "efficiently"? Have you ever had to drive your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We will raise our capability to expedite without devaluing our capability to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for front-end structuring are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will enlarge our ability to integrate without decreasing our power to scale. Think ultra-viral. Our feature set is second to none, but our social-network-based plug-and-play re-sizing and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will exploit the term "synergistic". Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for regulating new deliverables?