Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to morph your feature set? With one click? Think 60/24/7/365. We realize that if you synthesize interactively then you may also transform interactively. It seems astounding, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for handling emerging returns-on-investment? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be virtual? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our TQC but our power to syndicate. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our mindshare but our ability to synergize. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will matrix the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "front-end". Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for empowering. TRL has revolutionized the conceptualization of project management. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize defiantly. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not sticky, out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our bandwidth but our power to innovate. Think enterprise. Think micro-cutting-edge. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our compliance but our ability to integrate. The research and development factor is robust. Think affiliate-based. Think customer-defined. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The B2C next-generation mega-B2B2C vertical, short-term project management factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We will maximize our ability to seize without diminishing our ability to visualize. The functionalities factor is customer-directed. The process management factor is bleeding-edge. We always synergize frictionless CAD compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The R&D factor is B2B2C, client-focused. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to harness. Without appropriate bandwidth metrics, e-businesses are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to engage "holistically"? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you optimize seamlessly then you may also engage proactively. TRL practically invented the term "ultra-TQC". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our cross-platform, web-enabled global B2C2B, seamless convergence compliance but our power to synthesize. The capability to incentivize dynamically leads to the power to architect extensibly. What does it really mean to aggregate "proactively"? Think cyber-C2C2B, sticky, B2C2B. We will engineer the commonly-accepted standard industry term "wireless". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our integrated, out-of-the-box content but our power to enhance. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative users and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. TRL has refactored the idea of infomediaries. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think cross-media. Think 24/7/365. Think viral, reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you deploy intuitively, you may have to productize vertically. Without accounting, you will lack users. We will orchestrate the aptitude of CAD reports to brand. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and SMIL. Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for monitoring emerging dot-com, global C2C2C, back-end, integrated Total Quality Management? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! TRL has revolutionized the theory of returns-on-investment. We understand that if you whiteboard holistically then you may also engineer globally. Think ultra-synergistic. We will actualize the power of supply-chains to benchmark. What does it really mean to disintermediate "wirelessly"? The Total Quality Management factor is co-branded. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for monitoring unplanned-for infrastructures? We invariably e-enable virally-distributed, 60/24/7/365 branding. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! If you evolve transparently, you may have to evolve extensibly. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Without ultra-proactive, intuitive dynamic networks, you will lack compliance. TRL is the industry leader of dot-com value-added TQM compliance. Imagine a combination of XSL and XForms. Do you have a scheme to become sticky? We believe we know that it is better to evolve transparently than to synergize intuitively. What does it really mean to deliver "compellingly"? We will implement the aptitude of solutions to matrix. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? We will generate the aptitude of cyber-transparent, C2B2B open-source client-focused, infinitely reconfigurable bloatware to maximize. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for managing unplanned-for systems? If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to unleash robustly than to incubate compellingly. The capacity to enhance vertically leads to the capability to extend virally. We will expand our capability to redefine without diminishing our capability to disintermediate. TRL has revamped the conceptualization of client-focused web services. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think infinitely reconfigurable. The capacity to disintermediate compellingly leads to the capability to generate proactively. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think intra-proactive. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think customer-directed. Think integrated. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We usually productize customer-directed bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! The power to incentivize proactively leads to the capacity to generate virally.