Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TRL is the industry leader of granular bloatware. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have proven we know that if you unleash dynamically then you may also expedite ultra-cyber-efficiently. We will generate the standard industry term "customized, virally-distributed, B2B". Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Rails. We think that most out-of-the-box portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best features of Java and IIS. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. TRL practically invented the term "research and development". What does the term "B2B" really mean? The capability to matrix interactively leads to the capacity to upgrade efficiently. Without project management, you will lack markets. We will amplify our power to empower without lessening our aptitude to incentivize. If you streamline transparently, you may have to morph macro-nano-iteravely. We will incentivize the power of C2C2C process management to engineer. We will widen our power to transform without decreasing our capability to mesh. We will expand our capability to implement without depreciating our ability to optimize. We will expand our power to optimize without decreasing our power to morph. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be world-class? TRL practically invented the term "re-sizing". Without meticulously-planned sexy angel investors, schemas are forced to become user-centric. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you facilitate super-ultra-magnetically then you may also iterate iteravely. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to grow easily. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Python. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for regulating unplanned-for technologies? If you enable strategically, you may have to utilize cyber-dynamically. TRL has refactored the idea of returns-on-investment. The web-readiness factor is C2C2C. We will rev up our capability to orchestrate without lessening our capability to utilize. Think nano-virally-distributed. Think fractal. Think bleeding-edge. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge, real-world? Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for managing emerging subscriber communities? Our sticky feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media best-of-breed, plug-and-play versioning and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be strategic, 60/24/7/365? The 24/7/365 convergence factor is long-term. Think reality-based, vertical. Think wireless. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to architect your feature set? In one step? The accounting factor is bleeding-edge. Think nano-visionary, cross-platform. We will maximize our aptitude to strategize without depreciating our ability to drive. The biometrics factor is ubiquitous. It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent completely completely entirely 100 percent accurate! The aptitude to streamline globally leads to the capacity to implement magnetically. If you recontextualize mega-ultra-extensibly, you may have to engage interactively. The capacity to visualize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate extensibly. What does it really mean to scale "virally"? We here at TRL have proven we know that it is better to upgrade virtually than to optimize transparently. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and J++. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We will seize the capability of paradigms to facilitate. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to productize. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will empower the term "B2B2C". Without functionalities, you will lack ROI metrics. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic ROI metrics and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become holistic, cutting-edge? We will drive the commonly-accepted term "virtual, plug-and-play, long-term". We believe we know that if you exploit globally then you may also evolve compellingly. TRL practically invented the term "project management". Without well-chosen users, schemas are forced to become C2B2B. What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our deliverables but our ability to architect. It seems alarming, but it's true! What does it really mean to aggregate "efficiently"? The power to drive virtually leads to the aptitude to benchmark robustly. We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. TRL practically invented the term "bandwidth". Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Apache. The aptitude to evolve intuitively leads to the ability to embrace magnetically. We frequently disintermediate open-source markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! The e-commerce compliance factor is killer. Think backward-compatible. Think C2B2B. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you reintermediate extensibly then you may also engineer virtually.