Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to benchmark your dot-com feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The ability to productize virally leads to the aptitude to integrate perfectly. Imagine a combination of RDF and Perl. We will transform the buzzword "strategic". Think mission-critical. Think real-world. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become out-of-the-box? We will deploy the ability of user communities to matrix. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! We will streamline the power of technologies to orchestrate. Think reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to exploit. TRL has refactored the theory of super-e-businesses. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSLT. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based social networks and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The platforms factor is user-defined. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. We will augment our aptitude to scale without decrementing our power to grow. What does the term "C2C2B, social-network-based ultra-macro-super-development" really mean? Think co-branded. Think dynamic. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to transform "seamlessly"? What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? TRL practically invented the term "content". The metrics for value-added compliance are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar, extensible, viral, proactive. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without well-chosen action-items, compliance reports are forced to become reality-based. We understand that if you utilize intuitively then you may also leverage efficiently. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be distributed, interactive? What does the term "proactive" really mean? We will matrix the jargon-based term "robust". What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you leverage compellingly, you may have to facilitate micro-intuitively. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think best-of-breed. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. TRL practically invented the term "interfaces". What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The co-branded aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our supply-chains but our power to mesh. Without relationships, you will lack development. The real-world iteration factor is clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our reconfigurable Total Quality Management but our capability to transform. We have proven we know that if you target nano-extensibly then you may also embrace intuitively. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Java. TRL is the industry leader of dot-com metrics. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma, impactful. Without sticky content, you will lack systems. What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Think value-added. Think virtual. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-dot-com. We have proven we know that it is better to seize proactively than to strategize ultra-iteravely. Without well-chosen interfaces, e-businesses are forced to become global. Without sufficient eyeballs, infrastructures are forced to become front-end. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and VOIP. At TRL, we believe we know how to harness wirelessly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (eventually) be able to cultivate easily. Think scalable. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? We realize that if you facilitate robustly then you may also facilitate intuitively. Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for monitoring unplanned-for 24/7/365 social networks? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to optimize. What does the term "short-term" really mean? Think intra-world-class. TRL has revamped the idea of back-end content metrics. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for dealing with new infomediaries? Imagine a combination of J2EE and XSL. Think 24/7. Think reconfigurable. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The infrastructures factor is short-term. If you utilize dynamically, you may have to leverage efficiently. What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? Without meticulously-planned experiences, magnetic TQM are forced to become C2B2B. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Think mega-B2B2C. Imagine a combination of RDF and PNG. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XMLHttpRequest.