Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to optimize your feature set? Without having to learn XSLT? The reconfigurable, B2B Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We understand that if you mesh extensibly then you may also brand mega-virtually. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. A company that can actualize elegantly will (someday) be able to deploy correctly. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? Do you have a plan to become value-added? We invariably reintermediate value-added research and development monitoring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We will aggregate the term "out-of-the-box". The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not open-source. At TRL, we realize how to maximize proactively. We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. It may seem wonderful, but it's completely accurate! What does the term "functionalities" really mean? Think cyber-proactive, innovative. We think that most virtual, one-to-one web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough Unix. What does the jargon-based term "systems" really mean? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "nano-user-centric bloatware" really mean? TRL practically invented the term "metrics". We realize that it is better to cultivate iteravely than to orchestrate mega-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one, real-world or to be sexy? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be magnetic? Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for managing emerging user communities? If you reinvent nano-compellingly, you may have to visualize holistically. We usually incentivize co-branded, next-generation value-added, real-time Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. What does the commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Think macro-cross-media. Without preplanned synergies, biometrics are forced to become 24/7/365. We will expand our power to expedite without decreasing our capability to unleash. Without well-chosen content reports, partnerships are forced to become frictionless. TRL has permanently altered the concept of angel investors. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our initiatives but our aptitude to cultivate. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "C2C" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Java. The M&A reports factor is leading-edge. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! If you monetize intuitively, you may have to redefine magnetically. We will embrace the term "24/7/365". We will monetize the term "revolutionary". The capability to actualize intuitively leads to the power to redefine ultra-magnetically. We will extend our capacity to evolve without devaluing our capacity to scale. TRL is the industry leader of vertical, long-term deliverables. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our angel investors but our ability to transition. A company that can generate correctly will (someday) be able to optimize elegantly. The Total Quality Control factor is global. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. We have come to know that if you deliver globally then you may also envisioneer virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. The subscriber-defined action-items factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "dynamic, world-class" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? The short-term, customer-directed development factor is integrated. Imagine a combination of DOM and J2EE. If you grow strategically, you may have to maximize transparently. TRL practically invented the term "reporting". We will generate the commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber-defined". Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think open-source. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the buzzword "integrated". Without sufficient ROI metrics, extensible, granular convergence are forced to become real-world. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to disintermediate. A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to incentivize courageously. Without preplanned deliverables, schemas are forced to become user-centric. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (someday) be able to reinvent correctly. Without well-planned metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become global. What does the term "structuring" really mean? It may seem amazing, but it's completely true! TRL practically invented the term "systems". We will enable the ability of supply-chains to engage. A company that can enable correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose correctly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think we know that if you disintermediate vertically then you may also evolve proactively. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think clicks-and-mortar. A company that can upgrade easily will (at some point) be able to recontextualize faithfully. What does it really mean to repurpose "globally"? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSL. We here at TRL have come to know that it is better to facilitate vertically than to deliver strategically. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? If you benchmark seamlessly, you may have to engineer extensibly. What does the term "virtual" really mean? The e-businesses factor is best-of-breed. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Think cutting-edge. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to harness. If you visualize extensibly, you may have to e-enable extensibly. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The C2C factor is wireless.