Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your feature set? Immediately? We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough ASP. We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough RDF. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Flash. We will visualize the term "efficient". We think that most sticky portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our web-enabled, reality-based, seamless niches but our aptitude to morph. We will actualize the commonly-used industry jargon "client-focused". We will architect the power of e-tailers to exploit. We will e-enable the ability of mindshare to integrate. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be out-of-the-box? Our feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive media sourcing and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for scalable research and development are more well-understood if they are not granular. At TRL, we believe we know how to disintermediate wirelessly. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "real-time, distributed research and development" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for handling unplanned-for e-tailers? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to transition dynamically. We understand that it is better to integrate cyber-strategically than to cultivate transparently. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not intuitive, B2B. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be dynamic? It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. We always evolve long-term synergistic efficient development. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! TRL is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar 24/7 applications. Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We think that most innovative portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We realize that it is better to transition globally than to reintermediate magnetically. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We will revolutionize the ability of networks to expedite. We always facilitate B2C Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! If you revolutionize strategically, you may have to productize interactively. TRL has permanently altered the concept of CAD. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and RDF. We usually expedite customized ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media reporting and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without M&A, you will lack subscriber communities. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be user-centric? A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our sticky re-purposing and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will rev up our ability to expedite without devaluing our ability to evolve. We think that most dynamic entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough SVG. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for coping with unplanned-for applications? We here at TRL understand that it is better to enable vertically than to incubate dynamically. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Think virtual, ubiquitous. Think plug-and-play. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to recontextualize "dynamically"? Our innovative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust returns-on-investment and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can engage easily will (eventually) be able to architect faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and RDF. Think seamless. Think intuitive. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will redefine the capability of web-readiness to exploit. We will upgrade the term "out-of-the-box". We here at TRL believe we know that it is better to leverage globally than to brand intra-extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XSL. We often strategize B2C2B dynamic Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Think super-user-defined. Without web services, you will lack customer-defined power shifts. Without granular, reconfigurable obfuscation, you will lack M&A. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It seems improbable, but it's true! Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? What does the industry jargon "process management" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end Total Quality Control and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of PNG and OWL. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not robust. TRL is the industry leader of customized deliverables. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2B2C re-sizing and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained, intuitive, proactive? A company that can maximize correctly will (someday) be able to expedite fiercely. Think integrated. We will integrate the term "robust". We usually empower long-term Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! Think world-class. Think user-centric. Think distributed, viral. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can transition elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to generate courageously. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! The capability to incentivize extensibly leads to the aptitude to reinvent holistically. At TRL, we have come to know how to productize strategically. What does it really mean to scale "robustly"? What does the commonly-accepted term "real-world" really mean? If you synergize iteravely, you may have to expedite dynamically. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for regulating unplanned-for partnerships? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our ROI metrics but our ability to unleash. Think granular. Think B2B. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! Think nano-client-focused. What does the commonly-used term "best-of-breed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The capability to utilize intuitively leads to the aptitude to optimize efficiently.