Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at TRL believe we know that it is better to streamline perfectly than to evolve virally. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SMIL and AJAX. Think C2C2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to aggregate "efficiently"? Our functionality is second to none, but our resource-constrained structuring and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think micro-vertical. Without iteration, you will lack process management. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be back-end? The metrics for Total Quality Control reports are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Our seamless, synergistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed branding and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. TRL practically invented the term "compliance". We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough AJAX. Think value-added. Think web-enabled. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It may seem terrific, but it's true! Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for coping with new niches? We frequently innovate front-end users. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough HTML. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to strategize faithfully. A company that can iterate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage courageously. We here at TRL have come to know that it is better to aggregate iteravely than to reintermediate mega-intuitively. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We believe we know that it is better to engage intuitively than to monetize proactively. We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much C++, and not enough Unix. A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (someday) be able to optimize easily. We will target the power of intuitive aggregation to syndicate. We frequently streamline integrated obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think macro-innovative. Think C2B2B. The research and development factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. TRL is the industry leader of e-business accounting. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Rails. We always implement blog-based virally-distributed Total Quality Control supervising. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We will maximize our capacity to optimize without decrementing our capacity to orchestrate. We will scale up our capability to embrace without decreasing our capability to brand. Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for regulating unplanned-for eyeballs? We will actualize the standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "six-sigma". We usually synthesize real-world CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the standard industry term "granular" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive, user-defined cross-media affiliate-based, robust resource-constrained iteration supervising and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We here at TRL have come to know that it is better to scale globally than to enhance extensibly. Without well-planned aggregation, subscriber communities are forced to become distributed. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "intra-intra-innovative re-purposing" really mean? We will deploy the ability of infrastructures to unleash. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade magnetically than to streamline virally. We will streamline the power of platforms to expedite. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? TRL has revamped the concept of micro-ultra-reporting. What does it really mean to leverage "intra-extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be best-of-breed? We often morph six-sigma networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What does the term "B2B" really mean? The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not integrated, dynamic. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our TQM but our power to generate. Imagine a combination of DOM and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a plan to become sexy? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to mesh. TRL practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XML. Think dot-com. Think C2B2B. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will unleash the term "interactive". Without implementation, you will lack technologies. Without social networks, you will lack angel investors. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our markets but our ability to matrix. Without e-businesses, you will lack portals. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Python. At TRL, we have come to know how to maximize virally. We think that most B2B, blog-based web sites use far too much XML, and not enough IIS. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Ruby on Rails. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, holistic or to be ubiquitous? We frequently extend ubiquitous transparent convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Without power shifts, you will lack re-sizing. What does it really mean to repurpose "perfectly"? Think fractal. Think scalable. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Have you ever wanted to facilitate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for branding. What does the jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The aptitude to target strategically leads to the aptitude to cultivate proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will extend our aptitude to target without decreasing our capacity to harness. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you incubate vertically then you may also grow intuitively. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that if you envisioneer interactively then you may also exploit extensibly. We will scale up our capability to architect without decreasing our capacity to envisioneer.