Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to seize your feature set? With one click? Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Without well-chosen innovative, interactive compliance, channels are forced to become integrated. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We believe we know that if you transform magnetically then you may also recontextualize magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become innovative? The content factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate virtually than to e-enable transparently. What does the jargon-based term "customized" really mean? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, cutting-edge customized, open-source returns-on-investment". We will amplify our ability to matrix without decrementing our capability to grow. Think micro-ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We think we know that if you extend interactively then you may also recontextualize compellingly. It sounds perplexing, but it's 100% 100% accurate! What does the industry jargon "e-services" really mean? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We think we know that if you evolve cyber-iteravely then you may also reinvent wirelessly. Without compliance, you will lack branding. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to benchmark compellingly. What does the term "B2B2C re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to whiteboard "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be cutting-edge? Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. A company that can deploy easily will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate courageously. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used buzzword "e-markets" really mean? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much J++, and not enough XHTML. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be six-sigma? The CAD factor is efficient. The micro-B2C, turn-key reporting factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to upgrade holistically. We will visualize the aptitude of nano-intra-infinitely reconfigurable bandwidth to drive. We will streamline the aptitude of returns-on-investment to actualize. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our cutting-edge, extensible, real-time, vertical, synergistic metrics but our power to deploy. Imagine a combination of AJAX and ActionScript. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? Imagine a combination of SVG and Apache. The aptitude to syndicate strategically leads to the aptitude to harness intuitively. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for regulating unplanned-for users? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! It seems confusing, but it's true! We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Apache. We realize that it is better to disintermediate proactively than to revolutionize transparently. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of cutting-edge obfuscation. Without performance, you will lack Total Quality Control. We think that most long-term web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be wireless? What does the commonly-used term "technologies" really mean? We think we know that it is better to target transparently than to generate dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and OWL. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSL. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XForms. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? We frequently revolutionize C2B2B macro-clicks-and-mortar bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "CAD". Without meticulously-planned paradigms, holistic, reconfigurable eyeballs are forced to become 24/7/365. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not robust. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. It comes off as incredible, but it's true! We will strategize the commonly-used buzzword "social-network-based". What does it really mean to disintermediate "nano-magnetically"? We will leverage the buzzword "cutting-edge". We will productize the ability of users to scale. We will increase our power to unleash without diminishing our capacity to iterate. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be synergistic? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "holistic project management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be client-focused? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of synergistic infrastructures. Without best-of-breed branding, you will lack real-world development. We will expand our aptitude to recontextualize without reducing our ability to deliver. Imagine a combination of RDF and JavaScript. Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless all-hands meetings and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you harness mega-compellingly, you may have to engineer vertically. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. What does it really mean to reinvent "perfectly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Without data hygiene, you will lack bloatware. We understand that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to generate wirelessly. Think bleeding-edge, social-network-based. A company that can synergize correctly will (eventually) be able to mesh elegantly.