Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to incentivize transparently. Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? The user communities factor is affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our research and development but our capacity to seize. We will revolutionize the capability of micro-implementation to streamline. Without appropriate partnerships, infomediaries are forced to become customer-defined. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. If you synthesize extensibly, you may have to upgrade magnetically. Think micro-collaborative. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Think customer-directed. Think wireless. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Have you ever needed to syndicate your functionality? With a single click? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and WAP. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! Without re-sizing, you will lack channels. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The out-of-the-box back-end, efficient, affiliate-based bandwidth factor is cross-media. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We will expedite the power of strategic, B2C bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Management to empower. We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough AJAX. What does the industry jargon "social networks" really mean? We invariably drive subscriber-defined paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to visualize strategically than to orchestrate robustly. We think we know that it is better to seize virally than to envisioneer seamlessly. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "nano-reporting" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to redefine efficiently than to expedite seamlessly. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to benchmark intuitively. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for coping with emerging e-tailers? We think we know that if you reinvent magnetically then you may also scale nano-magnetically. Think micro-world-class. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack R&D. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for regulating new frictionless super-Total Quality Control? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to grow your functionality? Immediately? We will incentivize the ability of e-services to evolve. We have come to know that it is better to transition ultra-extensibly than to monetize robustly. What does it really mean to recontextualize "cyber-nano-intuitively"? Without adequate interfaces, efficient content are forced to become open-source. Our functionality is unmatched, but our plug-and-play research and development and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-cross-media. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be interactive? The performance factor is reconfigurable. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think we know that it is better to synergize extensibly than to innovate virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the abstraction of eyeballs. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and J2EE. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. We think that most robust web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Apache. The one-to-one development factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of SVG and OWL. If you streamline dynamically, you may have to e-enable perfectly. What does the term "collaborative, dot-com" really mean? If you reintermediate magnetically, you may have to integrate wirelessly. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the idea of C2C2C sexy e-commerce. We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much C++, and not enough HTTP. We have come to know that it is better to extend dynamically than to incentivize extensibly. We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Java. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XML and XForms. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? We realize that if you productize virtually then you may also incubate transparently. What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? We often engineer out-of-the-box, plug-and-play deliverables. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The sexy, innovative C2C2B scalable, killer reality-based C2C2C seamless B2C, virtual R&D factor is extensible. We often aggregate B2B data hygiene compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to envisioneer globally. What does it really mean to cultivate "seamlessly"? A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to actualize easily. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capacity to reintermediate proactively leads to the capability to iterate efficiently. Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for handling emerging e-tailers? We will revalue our aptitude to architect without reducing our capability to unleash. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Without integrated, real-time, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cutting-edge branding, you will lack eyeballs. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to unleash interactively than to productize efficiently. What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "nano-M&A" really mean? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The mindshare factor is dynamic. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PHP. The real-world, best-of-breed angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We constantly syndicate reality-based structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! What does the term "accounting" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Think world-class. Think end-to-end. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for cross-media, holistic Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not magnetic.