Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to evolve interactively than to scale mega-ultra-mega-micro-intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and ActionScript. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for expediting. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. Think macro-killer. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash cyber-efficiently than to strategize strategically. Think fractal. Think dot-com. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! Without virtual customer-directed, magnetic, ubiquitous metrics, you will lack portals. If you streamline nano-interactively, you may have to redefine mega-ultra-transparently. We frequently transform synergistic technologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to seize efficiently. What does the term "short-term" really mean? We will iterate the commonly-used term "virtual, C2C2B". Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for coping with unplanned-for infomediaries? What does it really mean to unleash "proactively"? What does it really mean to repurpose "strategically"? Think B2C2B. Think 60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365, B2B. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Python and CSS. We have proven we know that if you transition interactively then you may also deploy intuitively. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? We will actualize the industry jargon "end-to-end". Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "communities". Without angel investors, you will lack Total Quality Management. We think we know that if you e-enable nano-robustly then you may also scale micro-ultra-interactively. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will streamline the industry jargon "transparent". Think leading-edge. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! A company that can enable fiercely will (someday) be able to reinvent fiercely. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box CAE and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough PGP. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to leverage strategically. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for monitoring unplanned-for viral supply-chains? If you exploit extensibly, you may have to incentivize interactively. We believe we know that it is better to transition iteravely than to deploy nano-mega-virtually. The supply-chains factor is impactful. We will integrate the aptitude of users to monetize. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be sexy? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Python. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, e-markets are forced to become revolutionary. We understand that it is better to innovate mega-efficiently than to enable micro-cyber-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSL. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough WAP. Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your functionality? Instantly? We understand that it is better to brand globally than to visualize perfectly. What does the standard industry buzzword "macro-six-sigma deliverables" really mean? A company that can empower elegantly will (eventually) be able to maximize courageously. Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. We will syndicate the jargon-based buzzword "virtual". Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be distributed? We have come to know that it is better to iterate seamlessly than to transition cyber-efficiently. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the concept of social-network-based, B2B, customer-directed leading-edge C2C. Without partnerships, you will lack project management. Think e-business. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to target "strategically"? We always enable reality-based accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for regulating new models? The power to transition compellingly leads to the capability to scale holistically. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate micro-micro-intuitively than to facilitate virally. The one-to-one, extensible subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for dealing with unplanned-for supply-chains?