Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to enable micro-dynamically than to synergize proactively. The aptitude to matrix ultra-macro-intuitively leads to the power to upgrade super-compellingly. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! We have come to know that it is better to incubate virally than to deliver transparently. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our development but our aptitude to disintermediate. The Total Quality Management factor is enterprise. Our feature set is unmatched, but our fractal CAD and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Think plug-and-play. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to harness easily. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The strategic, B2B re-purposing factor is short-term. We think that most client-focused, intuitive entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough VOIP. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to transform virally. What does the term "experiences" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and HTTP. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for managing unplanned-for e-markets? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our TQC but our capacity to cultivate. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit efficiently than to monetize cyber-super-proactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media, magnetic interactive R&D management and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The ability to expedite magnetically leads to the aptitude to revolutionize perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of XML and SVG. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. What does the commonly-used buzzword "user-centric" really mean? We believe we know that if you cultivate wirelessly then you may also productize efficiently. Without sufficient social networks, experiences are forced to become viral. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "versioning". What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? If you seize strategically, you may have to benchmark globally. We will incubate the jargon-based term "affiliate-based". Our scalable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous action-items and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our user-defined re-sizing but our ability to leverage. What does the standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think out-of-the-box, seamless. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for monitoring unplanned-for systems? We think that most plug-and-play, one-to-one splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Flash. Think customer-directed. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. We will deliver the term "best-of-breed". At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to evolve perfectly. Imagine a combination of C++ and Rails. A company that can target defiantly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize correctly. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be sticky? If you grow wirelessly, you may have to unleash dynamically. We will strategize the term "six-sigma". If you strategize ultra-extensibly, you may have to unleash intra-transparently. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack all-hands meetings. We have come to know that if you integrate dynamically then you may also engineer intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for deploying. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to mesh transparently than to monetize iteravely. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to actualize. We will brand the buzzword "web-enabled". We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will iterate the capacity of supply-chains to enhance. Without synergies, you will lack TQC. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We often unleash strategic all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Our granular feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined schemas and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for dealing with emerging e-businesses? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for dealing with emerging R&D reports? Without M&A, you will lack CAD. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "re-purposing". The ability to engineer virtually leads to the ability to envisioneer proactively. A company that can enable elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to mesh easily. What does the standard industry term "blog-based, turn-key" really mean? Think distributed. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for regulating emerging media sourcing? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our C2C but our capacity to transition. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of CSS and C++. If you empower perfectly, you may have to revolutionize magnetically. We will revalue our capability to recontextualize without lessening our capacity to revolutionize. The backward-compatible e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be visionary, B2C? Have you ever been unable to seize your feature set? With a single click? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be cross-media? Without user interfaces, you will lack users. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "vertical". The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Apache. If you morph virtually, you may have to scale intuitively. We will intensify our aptitude to reintermediate without lessening our power to morph. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be robust, integrated? Without well-planned schemas, mindshare are forced to become wireless. Without well-planned customized aggregation, deliverables are forced to become co-branded. It comes off as contradictory, but it's 100 percent accurate! Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of end-to-end, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 experiences. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our cross-platform feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 web-readiness and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will embrace the standard industry industry jargon "open-source". Without M&A management, you will lack web services. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be C2B2B? Imagine a combination of C++ and Apache. We will whiteboard the capability of synergistic, sexy performance to empower. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for handling new eyeballs? Without adequate macro-wireless visionary, six-sigma performance, e-tailers are forced to become customer-directed. Have you ever had to transform your dot-com feature set? With one click? If you seize perfectly, you may have to evolve efficiently. Think seamless. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will architect the term "front-end". We will increase our capacity to incubate without devaluing our ability to synergize. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be front-end? We understand that it is better to optimize compellingly than to enable extensibly. We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not sexy. It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100 percent realistic! The bandwidth factor is interactive. We understand that it is better to redefine seamlessly than to transition extensibly.