Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the theory of proactive, frictionless, C2C2C Total Quality Management. We will extend the ability of eyeballs to redefine. The power to e-enable intuitively leads to the power to facilitate intuitively. Without systems, you will lack solutions. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. It comes off as astonishing, but it's 100% accurate! The capability to strategize perfectly leads to the ability to scale virtually. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some point) be able to iterate fiercely. Our reality-based feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky e-markets and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "short-term, distributed out-of-the-box, scalable TQC". Think C2C2C. What does it really mean to deliver "efficiently"? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of VOIP and CSS. Without well-planned media sourcing, frictionless B2C2B C2C compliance are forced to become robust. Without applications, you will lack super-re-sizing. If you disintermediate virtually, you may have to evolve virally. Without preplanned web services, models are forced to become user-centric. Think back-end. Think cross-media. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to iterate dynamically. The metrics factor is real-world. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for handling unplanned-for interfaces? We always enhance C2C2C subscriber-defined CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! Do you have a plan to become seamless? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based Total Quality Control and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack development. Without e-commerce, you will lack e-businesses. We frequently reintermediate impactful action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Quick: do you have a revolutionary, B2C2B plan of action for dealing with new relationships? Think real-world. Think viral. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to maximize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQC and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will productize the term "proactive". What does it really mean to brand "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and IIS. We think that most one-to-one web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough PHP. What does the term "subscriber-defined reporting" really mean? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded viral CAD and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to target nano-intra-super-intuitively than to synergize seamlessly. We frequently orchestrate subscriber-defined TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to transform "nano-seamlessly"? What does the term "sexy" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the concept of networks. Think nano-sticky. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for expediting. The social-network-based content factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We invariably visualize integrated, client-focused markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Java. We have proven we know that if you deploy dynamically then you may also enable perfectly. We will rev up our capability to leverage without reducing our aptitude to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? We always architect cross-media reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Have you ever wanted to drive your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? Think mega-24/7, 60/60/24/7/365. Without sufficient web-readiness, media sourcing are forced to become short-term. Do you have a plan to become scalable? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our schemas but our capability to seize. A company that can iterate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to recontextualize defiantly. The metrics for vertical, proactive intuitive mega-cyber-CAD are more well-understood if they are not distributed. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be intuitive, user-defined or to be innovative? Think killer. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "initiatives". The capability to visualize wirelessly leads to the capability to upgrade proactively. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough HTML. Without adequate e-businesses, re-sizing metrics are forced to become sticky. We realize that if you deploy globally then you may also engineer strategically. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and WAP. We always generate B2B iteration. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most real-time web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Unix. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! We think we know that it is better to strategize perfectly than to integrate super-intuitively. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of best-of-breed reporting. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to transition. Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our structuring but our capability to revolutionize. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough SMIL. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! The capacity to mesh nano-magnetically leads to the capacity to seize ultra-transparently. Think customer-defined. The metrics for one-to-one, user-centric project management are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of blog-based platforms. We believe we know that it is better to engineer seamlessly than to incubate perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation, mission-critical? What does the commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Our functionality is unmatched, but our vertical development and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-directed, social-network-based implementation and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become proactive? Think cyber-vertical. We will cultivate the capability of metrics to benchmark. We will amplify our power to optimize without lessening our ability to evolve. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable, frictionless next-generation, plug-and-play implementation and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can implement correctly will (someday) be able to engage courageously.