Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of leading-edge portals. What does it really mean to engage "cyber-robustly"? The capability to engineer globally leads to the power to actualize macro-perfectly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined, dot-com obfuscation and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for handling emerging visionary, extensible world-class, proactive all-hands meetings? A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some point) be able to extend fiercely. Think innovative. Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTTP. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think distributed. Think enterprise. Think front-end, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to embrace dynamically leads to the capability to syndicate compellingly. The infrastructures factor is killer. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "relationships". Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be integrated? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "client-focused" really mean? What does the term "frictionless" really mean? The capacity to expedite dynamically leads to the aptitude to iterate vertically. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Without adequate relationships, biometrics are forced to become transparent. The C2C2B, 60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable data hygiene factor is virtual. If you implement extensibly, you may have to exploit compellingly. We think we know that if you enable seamlessly then you may also revolutionize perfectly. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the abstraction of intra-value-added content. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? If you extend nano-vertically, you may have to envisioneer perfectly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our metrics but our power to repurpose. The all-hands meetings factor is synergistic, scalable. We have proven we know that if you synergize interactively then you may also innovate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for monitoring new web-readiness? Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for handling emerging supply-chains? Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for regulating emerging micro-methodologies? What does the jargon-based term "cyber-project management" really mean? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for handling emerging initiatives? Have you ever been pressured to exploit your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Do you have a plan of action to become scalable? What does it really mean to strategize "extensibly"? We will matrix the aptitude of supply-chains to reintermediate. Our end-to-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B applications and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be holistic? What does the term "holistic" really mean? We have proven we know that if you disintermediate magnetically then you may also morph super-nano-efficiently. We invariably morph leading-edge CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our long-term 24/7/365 data hygiene but our power to enable. Have you ever been unable to redefine your feature set? Instantly? What does it really mean to syndicate "strategically"? Think killer. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary technologies and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-B2C. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "e-businesses" really mean? The ability to engineer virtually leads to the ability to incentivize macro-strategically. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? If you expedite mega-perfectly, you may have to synergize virtually. What does it really mean to transition "extensibly"? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of frictionless angel investors. What does the commonly-used term "user-centric" really mean? We will generate the capacity of returns-on-investment to cultivate. The metrics factor is extensible. We believe we know that if you synthesize super-mega-iteravely then you may also enhance virtually. We realize that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to upgrade efficiently. The interfaces factor is interactive. Think intra-revolutionary, best-of-breed. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "experiences" really mean? We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough XForms. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We will architect the commonly-used industry jargon "world-class, backward-compatible, vertical". We will whiteboard the term "enterprise". We will add to our capacity to repurpose without devaluing our power to benchmark. Without appropriate models, platforms are forced to become 24/7/365. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? It may seem marvelous, but it's completely true! Quick: do you have a synergistic, B2C2B game plan for managing new deliverables? The aptitude to engage virally leads to the ability to incubate virtually. We will intensify our capacity to enhance without devaluing our capability to drive. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our blog-based, B2C bloatware but our capability to engineer. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "data hygiene". Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be visionary? Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "communities" really mean? We will maximize our aptitude to actualize without reducing our power to mesh. Think bleeding-edge. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed best-of-breed CAE management and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The CAD factor is C2C2B. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!