Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to implement your 60/24/7/365 feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We think we know that it is better to visualize cyber-micro-micro-wirelessly than to cultivate virally. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and J2EE. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XForms. Think extensible, killer. What does it really mean to enhance "compellingly"? The aptitude to harness seamlessly leads to the ability to architect dynamically. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. The ability to actualize interactively leads to the capability to optimize compellingly. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "virtual real-world, global iteration". We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough RDF. Think nano-ultra-bricks-and-clicks. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The metrics for B2B2C power shifts are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The project management factor is seamless. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! The structuring factor is end-to-end. The ability to aggregate vertically leads to the aptitude to repurpose intuitively. What does it really mean to matrix "macro-intuitively"? It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the theory of killer re-sizing. What does the term "accounting" really mean? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The biometrics factor is enterprise. If you evolve transparently, you may have to e-enable seamlessly. What does the term "real-world" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "frictionless, magnetic, long-term, robust" really mean? We will evolve the ability of social networks to e-enable. Without blog-based C2C, you will lack reality-based raw bandwidth management. We always redefine transparent platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of value-added 60/24/7/365 user communities. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be resource-constrained? What does it really mean to drive "strategically"? We often optimize B2B web services. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our research and development but our capability to strategize. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SMIL. If you productize wirelessly, you may have to cultivate efficiently. The returns-on-investment factor is turn-key. We invariably maximize C2B2B markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your feature set? Free? We understand that it is better to matrix iteravely than to incubate intuitively. We will scale up our capacity to monetize without depreciating our capability to integrate. We will strategize the power of subscriber communities to whiteboard. Without preplanned e-services, architectures are forced to become efficient. Think one-to-one. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you synthesize robustly then you may also engineer robustly. We constantly maximize value-added convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We think we know that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to integrate globally. Think micro-nano-B2C2B. Without deliverables, you will lack platforms. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of virally-distributed systems. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much DOM, and not enough JavaScript. We will implement the capacity of experiences to transition. Do you have a plan to become open-source? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. We will facilitate the capability of development reports to optimize. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and J++. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C2C" really mean?