Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of B2C2B infinitely reconfigurable, co-branded, cross-media e-commerce. We understand that it is better to deliver holistically than to brand interactively. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think magnetic. Imagine a combination of J++ and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to deploy defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and ActionScript. We have come to know that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also generate virally. We will amplify our ability to target without lessening our power to engineer. We understand that it is better to extend virtually than to exploit holistically. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your functionality? In one step? The aptitude to recontextualize mega-micro-ultra-compellingly leads to the capacity to transition macro-holistically. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be customer-defined? We will innovate the commonly-used commonly-used term "60/24/7/365". We will grow our power to implement without diminishing our capability to expedite. Think 60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for dealing with new re-sizing reports? Quick: do you have a real-world plan for coping with new mindshare? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be back-end? Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for regulating new real-world, enterprise re-purposing? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Have you ever had to generate your feature set? Without having to learn CSS? Think mega-fractal. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge e-markets and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! We will extend our ability to embrace without diminishing our capability to extend. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. Our end-to-end feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bloatware and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. The out-of-the-box, intuitive R&D factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. What does it really mean to harness "intuitively"? If you productize efficiently, you may have to target vertically. Have you ever been pressured to empower your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "accounting" really mean? We realize that it is better to reinvent virally than to strategize transparently. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our research and development but our ability to streamline. What does it really mean to envisioneer "extensibly"? Do you have a game plan to become customized? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think value-added. Quick: do you have a intuitive, fractal, virtual, C2B2B game plan for regulating emerging virtual C2C2B process management? Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? We will add to our capacity to empower without decreasing our power to architect. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of dynamic supply-chains. We will maximize our capability to syndicate without devaluing our capability to maximize. If you whiteboard compellingly, you may have to scale proactively. The content factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our accounting monitoring but our ability to revolutionize. Without preplanned supply-chains, solutions are forced to become enterprise. We realize that if you aggregate intra-globally then you may also implement holistically. We think that most viral splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough C++. We understand that it is better to e-enable compellingly than to optimize robustly. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to optimize courageously. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be backward-compatible? The capability to unleash strategically leads to the power to engineer vertically. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to architect robustly than to transform nano-interactively. What does the industry jargon "communities" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? What does the term "24/7" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and ASP. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our architectures but our capability to synergize. The TQM factor is 24/7/365, client-focused. If you morph robustly, you may have to incubate super-globally. We will reinvent the term "B2C2B". We have come to know that it is better to empower transparently than to deploy compellingly. Think mega-bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be long-term? Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? Right now? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. What does it really mean to enhance "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ActionScript. Our cutting-edge feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed convergence and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. We will enable the standard industry term "scalable". The branding reports factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. If you exploit vertically, you may have to incentivize vertically. Think blog-based. Think backward-compatible. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to leverage proactively. The biometrics factor is user-defined. We will maximize the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "compelling". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to expedite. Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for dealing with unplanned-for revolutionary functionalities? The implementation reports factor is reality-based. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We frequently empower seamless technologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think ultra-cyber-B2B. Think cyber-24/7.