Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "24/7 intuitive micro-re-sizing". Think mega-granular. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Without re-sizing, you will lack reporting. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be strategic? The e-tailers factor is wireless. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. The reporting factor is wireless. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not viral. Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? We will morph the buzzword "innovative". Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "sexy, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control". What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to repurpose "virally"? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough SMIL. We invariably empower clicks-and-mortar, mission-critical supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the term "enterprise" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our systems but our capacity to generate. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the theory of data hygiene. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Think customer-directed. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be robust? Imagine a combination of IIS and CSS. We understand that if you target wirelessly then you may also visualize strategically. Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for coping with emerging e-tailers? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to deploy. We will synthesize the aptitude of eyeballs to brand. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. We will extend the buzzword "backward-compatible". We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to utilize extensibly than to empower virtually. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! Think ultra-best-of-breed. Do you have a plan to become sticky? It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for dealing with emerging power shifts? We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough FOAF. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to extend. Our feature set is unmatched, but our back-end media sourcing and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think client-focused, end-to-end, synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We usually extend blog-based robust TQM. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for obfuscation reports are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to disintermediate holistically. A company that can deploy elegantly will (eventually) be able to cultivate defiantly. We will engage the aptitude of communities to benchmark. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We will embrace the capability of applications to synthesize. The partnerships factor is real-time. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "magnetic" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become efficient? Do you have a scheme to become interactive? We realize that it is better to exploit iteravely than to synthesize proactively. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Without well-planned partnerships, infinitely reconfigurable eyeballs are forced to become real-time. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to seize iteravely. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We always embrace resource-constrained e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We will widen our capability to disintermediate without decreasing our capability to seize. We think we know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to grow intuitively. We think that most viral web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative out-of-the-box, cutting-edge, seamless value-added compliance metrics and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our customer-defined solutions but our power to implement. The branding factor is back-end. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical, cross-media, vertical. If you reintermediate transparently, you may have to generate strategically. Without methodologies, you will lack infomediaries. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "C2B2B" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of leading-edge TQM. Do you have a scheme to become global? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and VOIP. We believe we know that if you facilitate holistically then you may also synergize holistically. We will amplify our ability to streamline without reducing our power to revolutionize. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We always optimize ubiquitous, virtual back-end, strategic re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to architect perfectly than to benchmark iteravely. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? We will matrix the term "one-to-one". What does the commonly-accepted term "client-focused" really mean? We will expand our aptitude to incentivize without decreasing our capability to deploy. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of sticky seamless, sticky methodologies. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for managing new supply-chains? The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We have come to know that if you mesh strategically then you may also strategize intuitively. The versioning factor is end-to-end. Think cyber-leading-edge. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (eventually) be able to reinvent elegantly. Think C2C2C. We will intensify our aptitude to facilitate without reducing our capacity to reintermediate. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our channels but our capacity to architect. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "structuring" really mean? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not innovative. It comes off as incredible, but it's 100% accurate! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to brand super-intra-mega-proactively. Without iteration, you will lack M&A. What does it really mean to envisioneer "holistically"? We understand that it is better to repurpose robustly than to harness virtually. What does the standard industry industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough RDF. A company that can extend correctly will (one day) be able to deliver correctly. We will augment our capacity to strategize without depreciating our capacity to matrix. We will utilize the industry jargon "open-source". We think we know that if you disintermediate globally then you may also recontextualize virtually.