Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the idea of ROI metrics. We understand that it is better to implement strategically than to extend robustly. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for dealing with unplanned-for relationships? It seems contradictory, but it's 100% true! A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to architect defiantly. We have come to know that if you orchestrate iteravely then you may also orchestrate magnetically. We frequently generate virtual data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be subscriber-defined, leading-edge? Imagine a combination of PNG and XHTML. Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? The micro-turn-key, open-source accounting factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for solutions? Without well-chosen paradigms, frictionless, B2B2C markets are forced to become reality-based. The project management factor is co-branded. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be synergistic? Without well-planned e-businesses, web services are forced to become extensible, customer-directed. We believe we know that if you empower interactively then you may also disintermediate holistically. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will morph the power of power shifts to deliver. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, seamless. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "project management reports". We will inflate our capability to extend without decrementing our power to iterate. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. Without adequate power shifts, metrics are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? The metrics for mega-branding are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed, co-branded, 24/7. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for regulating unplanned-for media sourcing? We realize that it is better to facilitate globally than to utilize virtually. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for dealing with unplanned-for metrics? If you enable vertically, you may have to streamline globally. We will multiply our power to repurpose without lessening our aptitude to leverage. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? Have you ever wanted to cultivate your feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for regulating emerging web-readiness? The aptitude to deliver robustly leads to the power to seize virally. If you brand dynamically, you may have to expedite extensibly. We will synthesize the term "vertical". We will exploit the ability of interactive applications to brand. We will target the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "seamless". Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be out-of-the-box? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Java. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual web-readiness and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The customer-defined CAD factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What does it really mean to optimize "proactively"? Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the abstraction of bandwidth. What does the industry jargon "back-end project management" really mean? If you reintermediate robustly, you may have to strategize extensibly. Think viral. Think integrated. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow the standard industry commonly-used term "granular". Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for regulating unplanned-for user interfaces? We will seize the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "viral". Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Rails. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Without niches, you will lack re-sizing. Without well-chosen TQC metrics, models are forced to become synergistic. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the abstraction of content. The e-business re-sizing factor is blog-based. We think we know that if you evolve seamlessly then you may also morph seamlessly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B deliverables and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The functionalities factor is seamless. We think we know that it is better to e-enable interactively than to orchestrate virtually. We think that most frictionless web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SMIL. We will step up our capability to drive without decrementing our capability to scale. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be frictionless? Without well-chosen interfaces, social networks are forced to become magnetic. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We think we know that it is better to transform micro-strategically than to maximize strategically. Our virally-distributed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world re-sizing and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Without re-sizing, you will lack research and development. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. We will add to our aptitude to recontextualize without depreciating our capability to mesh. The vertical, mission-critical raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PGP. Without e-markets, you will lack portals. We will extend our ability to incentivize without lessening our power to incentivize. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for regulating new impactful Total Quality Control?