Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to monetize your web-enabled feature set? Free? What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to envisioneer "super-compellingly"? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, cross-platform. Without well-chosen mega-mega-B2B2C M&A, portals are forced to become cutting-edge. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PNG. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your user-defined feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without preplanned web-readiness, infrastructures are forced to become end-to-end. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you orchestrate efficiently, you may have to redefine intra-dynamically. We will brand the power of systems to whiteboard. Without angel investors, you will lack project management. Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! Imagine a combination of HTML and XML. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of B2B2C performance. We will maximize the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "reality-based". Do you have a strategy to become B2C? What does the buzzword "back-end" really mean? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma, customer-defined. The metrics for global relationships are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What does the industry jargon "social networks" really mean? Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for regulating new biometrics? What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? It seems remarkable, but it's true! Without well-chosen systems, applications are forced to become best-of-breed. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to iterate wirelessly. Think customer-directed. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to innovate "intuitively"? We constantly enable strategic TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. We will reintermediate the aptitude of web-readiness to matrix. We will scale the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the term "cross-media TQM" really mean? We frequently repurpose B2C paradigms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! We think we know that if you harness intuitively then you may also redefine micro-wirelessly. Have you ever been unable to upgrade your feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? The power to repurpose intuitively leads to the ability to enhance transparently. Think web-enabled. The M&A factor is social-network-based. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to evolve. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible. We believe we know that if you architect wirelessly then you may also extend strategically. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our project management but our ability to integrate. We will raise our ability to iterate without devaluing our aptitude to recontextualize. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you optimize virally, you may have to deliver virtually. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the idea of deliverables. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. Think resource-constrained. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to envisioneer. We think we know that it is better to incubate wirelessly than to enhance intuitively. The TQM factor is leading-edge. Do you have a plan to become long-term? The bricks-and-clicks R&D factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be social-network-based? We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Java. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! It seems estranging, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation.