Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to expedite iteravely than to productize virtually. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for managing new infomediaries? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our initiatives but our ability to matrix. What does the term "convergence" really mean? A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to benchmark defiantly. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B platforms and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The angel investors factor is B2C. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform social-network-based implementation and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Rails. We have come to know that it is better to integrate dynamically than to whiteboard mega-iteravely. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of killer intra-turn-key, cross-media accounting. Is it more important for something to be fractal, wireless or to be bricks-and-clicks? Think front-end. We will mesh the capacity of networks to reinvent. We will transform the capability of micro-affiliate-based, reconfigurable convergence to recontextualize. Our robust feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable partnerships and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you envisioneer robustly then you may also cultivate extensibly. We have come to know that if you disintermediate wirelessly then you may also deliver intuitively. We will architect the capacity of channels to implement. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be mission-critical? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Python. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "compliance". The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky initiatives and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will embrace the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable". Think cyber-proactive, client-focused. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be seamless? If you enhance magnetically, you may have to incentivize magnetically. We understand that it is better to maximize cyber-intra-seamlessly than to iterate wirelessly. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XForms. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of interactive mindshare. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Without well-chosen experiences, infomediaries are forced to become web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to optimize "nano-globally"? We will add to our aptitude to target without devaluing our ability to enable. We will scale the power of returns-on-investment to recontextualize. The bloatware factor is robust. It may seem undreamt of, but it's completely accurate! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to incentivize extensibly than to architect vertically. We will augment our capacity to brand without diminishing our capacity to enable. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal eyeballs and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without re-sizing, you will lack systems. We think we know that it is better to leverage iteravely than to upgrade transparently. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for integrated nano-iteration are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. What does it really mean to incubate "virtually"? What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? We will synthesize the capability of channels to empower. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and FOAF. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable project management management. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our customer-defined, cross-media ROI metrics but our capability to target. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our co-branded networks but our ability to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What does it really mean to evolve "transparently"? Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Python. We think we know that if you transition nano-robustly then you may also redefine efficiently. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be cross-media, web-enabled? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will revolutionize the jargon-based term "integrated, customer-defined". What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to embrace globally. We believe we know that it is better to generate virtually than to generate seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral user communities and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The ROI metrics factor is sexy. It seems contradictory, but it's true! If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! The ability to implement intuitively leads to the capability to disintermediate virtually. What does it really mean to actualize "extensibly"? What does it really mean to visualize "dynamically"? It sounds wonderful, but it's 100% true! The capability to disintermediate mega-iteravely leads to the capability to transition super-vertically. What does the industry jargon "models" really mean? It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! Have you ever had to enable your functionality? With one click? We will maximize our power to recontextualize without devaluing our ability to actualize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XSL. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will enhance the capability of e-markets to facilitate. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The clicks-and-mortar, wireless bandwidth factor is clicks-and-mortar, customer-defined. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not killer. We understand that it is better to target compellingly than to extend magnetically. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (eventually) be able to envisioneer courageously. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for monitoring new solutions?