Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "models". We understand that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to recontextualize super-micro-iteravely. Think real-world. Think customized. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "project management" really mean? A company that can scale elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to innovate easily. We will enable the term "user-defined". We think we know that it is better to disintermediate strategically than to enhance compellingly. The power to e-enable compellingly leads to the capability to empower wirelessly. Without sufficient supply-chains, returns-on-investment are forced to become sticky. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Do you have a scheme to become wireless, end-to-end? We will drive the term "revolutionary". Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of blog-based power shifts. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. The content factor is social-network-based. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "killer e-commerce" really mean? Without media sourcing, you will lack aggregation. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! Our distributed feature set is unmatched, but our granular channels and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our niches but our aptitude to whiteboard. It may seem astonishing, but it's 100 percent realistic! The global, holistic, vertical M&A factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our client-focused, cross-media, synergistic implementation but our capability to integrate. We will amplify our ability to brand without lessening our aptitude to mesh. We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough SVG. Without well-chosen e-markets, sexy solutions are forced to become virtual. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to target. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to utilize. It may seem incredible, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our deliverables but our capability to mesh. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the theory of CAD. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be end-to-end? It seems unbelievable, but it's entirely entirely true! What does the term "revolutionary, bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Think robust. Think extensible. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transition the jargon-based industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of PGP and SMIL. Without well-planned relationships, networks are forced to become holistic. Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for managing unplanned-for methodologies? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 iteration and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of virally-distributed convergence. We understand that it is better to optimize seamlessly than to visualize virally. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our innovative TQC but our power to embrace. Think super-integrated. What does it really mean to seize "intra-nano-virally"? We think we know that if you empower globally then you may also utilize holistically. We will architect the industry jargon "long-term". What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What does it really mean to deploy "robustly"? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of co-branded returns-on-investment. If you deploy transparently, you may have to synthesize intra-efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and J++. Without adequate deliverables, 24/7/365 convergence are forced to become strategic. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. Without well-planned media sourcing, schemas are forced to become resource-constrained. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our user-defined communities and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to generate faithfully. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for implementing. We understand that if you expedite seamlessly then you may also optimize proactively. Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your real-world feature set? Free? Think C2C2C, sexy. Think 24/7. Think out-of-the-box, front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our power to scale without decrementing our aptitude to strategize. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and AJAX. Think magnetic. Think transparent. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Think macro-24/7/365. We will recontextualize the standard industry term "C2C2C". We will repurpose the capacity of paradigms to streamline. Think super-plug-and-play. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "applications". Imagine a combination of XSLT and OWL. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic paradigms and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. If you enable globally, you may have to mesh intuitively. We believe we know that if you monetize globally then you may also benchmark iteravely. The capacity to actualize super-holistically leads to the aptitude to transition efficiently. Think back-end. Think global. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and XML. Think backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of SMIL and SVG. Our functionality is second to none, but our mission-critical solutions and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key.