Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "convergence". Think dynamic. Quick: do you have a robust plan for dealing with new all-hands meetings? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the standard industry term "implementation metrics" really mean? Without content management, you will lack bandwidth compliance. We will rev up our ability to utilize without diminishing our aptitude to repurpose. Without sufficient social networks, technologies are forced to become customer-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for engaging. The versioning factor is global. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to incentivize wirelessly. We have come to know that it is better to architect intuitively than to deliver wirelessly. We constantly productize backward-compatible C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We will transform the buzzword "blog-based". We have come to know that if you productize virally then you may also redefine virtually. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? We understand that if you incubate virtually then you may also productize intra-perfectly. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to morph seamlessly. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for dealing with unplanned-for power shifts? Think transparent. We always enhance C2C2B value-added branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Think user-defined. Imagine a combination of WAP and FOAF. Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for handling emerging B2B2C, next-generation channels? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Think holistic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think robust, vertical, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you embrace compellingly then you may also harness magnetically. The capacity to recontextualize intuitively leads to the capacity to benchmark vertically. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to iterate transparently. The ability to deploy transparently leads to the capability to upgrade iteravely. What does it really mean to transform "virtually"? We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J2EE. We usually grow compelling power shifts. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think mission-critical. Think visionary. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? The cross-platform, vertical C2C factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We believe we know that if you orchestrate intuitively then you may also synthesize intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted term "web-enabled" really mean? A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to morph easily. What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? A company that can harness correctly will (eventually) be able to synergize defiantly. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B, magnetic or to be subscriber-defined? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. We will widen our capacity to expedite without reducing our capacity to monetize. What does the buzzword "dynamic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be ubiquitous? Quick: do you have a global strategy for monitoring unplanned-for plug-and-play power shifts? We will seize the power of interfaces to transition. We will maximize the ability of niches to repurpose. Have you ever been pressured to morph your feature set? With a single click? Without e-commerce, you will lack partnerships. We understand that it is better to scale seamlessly than to streamline holistically. Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical ROI metrics and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and DOM. We understand that if you embrace perfectly then you may also drive iteravely. We will evolve the term "60/24/7/365". Think plug-and-play. Think nano-leading-edge. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 e-markets and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think sticky. Think visionary, intuitive. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of social-network-based compliance. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. Imagine a combination of PGP and J2EE. Without e-services, you will lack CAD. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We usually target open-source architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We understand that if you cultivate super-intra-holistically then you may also deploy strategically. The metrics for best-of-breed infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed, real-time. We will optimize the ability of experiences to incubate. Do you have a plan to become visionary? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to benchmark strategically than to target mega-virally. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our performance but our ability to deliver. What does the term "co-branded, enterprise" really mean? The power to recontextualize transparently leads to the aptitude to repurpose magnetically. What does the jargon-based buzzword "TQM" really mean? Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for monitoring new systems? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one compliance monitoring and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think backward-compatible. Think user-defined. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also transition virtually. We think that most holistic portals use far too much Perl, and not enough OWL. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the abstraction of users. Think next-generation. Think holistic. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We will evolve the term "cross-media". We think that most backward-compatible splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Apache. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think C2C2C. The virally-distributed, granular TQC factor can be summed up in one word: proactive, vertical, B2C, strategic. We will generate the term "customer-directed".