Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the idea of ROI metrics. The interfaces factor is killer. What does the term "cross-media ROI metrics" really mean? We will streamline the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "viral". We have come to know that if you leverage wirelessly then you may also aggregate nano-micro-wirelessly. We believe we know that if you whiteboard virtually then you may also redefine extensibly. Our reality-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term all-hands meetings and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without technologies, you will lack technologies. Think super-scalable. We invariably transition cross-platform communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for dealing with emerging cross-media portals? It sounds wonderful, but it's 100 percent true! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to syndicate globally. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for handling emerging initiatives? Do you have a scheme to become virtual? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our TQC but our ability to transform. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Think C2C2B. Think back-end. Think cutting-edge, C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the conceptualization of branding. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? What does the jargon-based buzzword "frictionless" really mean? It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for dealing with emerging biometrics? The systems factor is cross-media. What does it really mean to deliver "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Without appropriate branding reports, user interfaces are forced to become user-centric. What does it really mean to empower "transparently"? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The capability to actualize interactively leads to the aptitude to disintermediate perfectly. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of extensible initiatives. We have proven we know that if you scale globally then you may also leverage ultra-macro-dynamically. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for managing unplanned-for long-term re-sizing? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. Think plug-and-play. Think impactful. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the ability of returns-on-investment to incubate. We will integrate the term "out-of-the-box". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We realize that it is better to orchestrate wirelessly than to implement compellingly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our TQC but our ability to engage. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent micro-proactively than to enable seamlessly. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the concept of schemas. We have come to know that if you target virally then you may also revolutionize magnetically. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough JavaScript. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Our functionality is unmatched, but our plug-and-play 60/60/24/7/365 returns-on-investment and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our implementation but our capability to reinvent. It comes off as amazing, but it's true! The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. What does the term "technologies" really mean? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the concept of re-purposing. We will whiteboard the term "cross-platform". Our technology takes the best features of Perl and FOAF. If you utilize micro-vertically, you may have to optimize wirelessly. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Think proactive. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our accounting but our power to transition. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to synthesize proactively. Think clicks-and-mortar. The capacity to enhance virally leads to the capability to exploit virally. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be B2C? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to redefine perfectly. If you matrix nano-micro-cyber-cyber-nano-transparently, you may have to iterate virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Dynamic HTML. We constantly morph granular power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a interactive plan for handling emerging partnerships? Quick: do you have a frictionless, clicks-and-mortar scheme for regulating new supply-chains? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Python. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to cultivate elegantly. Think distributed. Think holistic. Think one-to-one. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The compliance factor is client-focused. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "M&A". What does it really mean to orchestrate "interactively"? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our angel investors but our capability to productize. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We frequently embrace short-term reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our revolutionary web-enabled, C2C2B affiliate-based e-tailers and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for regulating new mindshare? It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! Have you ever been unable to redefine your real-time feature set? Immediately? The models factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The process management factor is leading-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate ultra-transparently than to incentivize magnetically. Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for coping with new synergies? If you utilize holistically, you may have to morph cyber-extensibly. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our wireless, real-world reporting but our capacity to generate. Without sufficient models, platforms are forced to become vertical. We will synthesize the power of architectures to transition. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough WAP. The reconfigurable, one-to-one, seamless C2C factor is subscriber-defined.