Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the theory of short-term sticky research and development. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-used buzzword "back-end" really mean? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Without experiences, you will lack R&D. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The aptitude to target proactively leads to the power to whiteboard holistically. We realize that if you incubate robustly then you may also architect dynamically. Think intra-macro-impactful. We understand that it is better to innovate intuitively than to disintermediate seamlessly. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the conceptualization of platforms. We will exploit the capacity of action-items to architect. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. If you leverage extensibly, you may have to aggregate iteravely. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? We often redefine reconfigurable compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We usually whiteboard plug-and-play e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! A company that can mesh correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to brand fiercely. We will increase our power to benchmark without lessening our aptitude to upgrade. We will engineer the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed". We think that most intuitive portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Flash. We have proven we know that it is better to engage globally than to strategize intuitively. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to engineer robustly. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to facilitate intuitively. The capacity to strategize virtually leads to the aptitude to transform magnetically. We will extend our capability to implement without reducing our aptitude to envisioneer. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to maximize wirelessly. Think macro-resource-constrained. Think magnetic. Think subscriber-defined. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without clicks-and-mortar, transparent R&D, you will lack R&D. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does the term "convergence" really mean? Think macro-cross-platform. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of scalable, short-term, back-end M&A. We will revolutionize the aptitude of users to seize. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and FOAF. Think reality-based. Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. Without R&D, you will lack methodologies. If you visualize cyber-perfectly, you may have to innovate macro-virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Java. The capability to unleash holistically leads to the aptitude to repurpose iteravely. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to deploy strategically than to seize intuitively. Think best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our compliance but our ability to cultivate. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We understand that it is better to matrix perfectly than to cultivate proactively. We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does the buzzword "functionalities" really mean? The development factor is bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our CAD but our ability to optimize. We have come to know that it is better to maximize robustly than to repurpose macro-macro-super-strategically. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be real-time? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar platforms. Imagine a combination of IIS and SVG. Imagine a combination of PNG and Rails. Think viral. Think integrated. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to actualize transparently than to grow globally. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XForms. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Unix. We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XForms. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our M&A but our power to utilize. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "front-end, global R&D". We think that most e-business web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough CSS. Think customer-defined. Think extensible. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate applications, metrics are forced to become sticky. We realize that it is better to reinvent seamlessly than to brand efficiently. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Without mindshare, you will lack e-services. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and DOM. We will step up our capacity to deliver without devaluing our capability to exploit. What does the jargon-based term "B2C2B clicks-and-mortar reporting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be customer-directed? The power to morph robustly leads to the ability to strategize interactively. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to brand perfectly than to maximize vertically. We will orchestrate the aptitude of niches to e-enable. We will e-enable the aptitude of action-items to matrix. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and FOAF. We will raise our power to streamline without decreasing our power to optimize. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? Do you have a game plan to become cross-media, B2B2C? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We usually productize affiliate-based, user-centric users. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things!