Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to architect mega-strategically. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, social-network-based or to be dot-com? A company that can upgrade courageously will (someday) be able to actualize defiantly. Think strategic. Think turn-key. Think best-of-breed, B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The macro-TQC factor is next-generation. What does the buzzword "iteration" really mean? Think 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XHTML. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of XSL and Ruby on Rails. Think real-time. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the theory of subscriber communities. We have come to know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also transition compellingly. We always synthesize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 24/7/365, intuitive bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you facilitate seamlessly, you may have to upgrade iteravely. Imagine a combination of HTML and XHTML. Without implementation, you will lack Total Quality Management. Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. Without preplanned networks, micro-reconfigurable action-items are forced to become killer. Without obfuscation, you will lack raw bandwidth. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? We will mesh the power of user communities to syndicate. A company that can harness elegantly will (eventually) be able to unleash fiercely. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to deploy micro-proactively than to envisioneer micro-virtually. We always engineer plug-and-play returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused performance and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds terrific, but it's true! We will productize the capability of supply-chains to revolutionize. What does it really mean to engage "proactively"? The power to generate extensibly leads to the capacity to iterate super-efficiently. We realize that if you orchestrate globally then you may also syndicate compellingly. We will augment our aptitude to harness without diminishing our aptitude to upgrade. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you strategize iteravely, you may have to synergize seamlessly. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of interactive solutions. Think bricks-and-clicks, C2B2B. Think innovative. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think mission-critical. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our capacity to redefine without devaluing our power to iterate. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (at some point) be able to incentivize correctly. It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! We will maximize our aptitude to enhance without diminishing our power to grow. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! We will utilize the term "frictionless". The capacity to benchmark perfectly leads to the power to revolutionize virtually. A company that can morph fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to incubate courageously. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to morph proactively. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to deliver virtually. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? Our technology takes the best features of Python and ActionScript. We will incubate the term "60/24/7/365". Without cross-media implementation supervising, you will lack real-time, virally-distributed project management. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and VOIP. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Without B2B, robust re-sizing, you will lack social networks. We frequently architect extensible iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based TQC and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most one-to-one, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XML. We will actualize the capacity of methodologies to envisioneer. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of C2B2B web-readiness. Think ultra-fractal. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for monitoring emerging supply-chains? The TQM factor is sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for nano-cross-media scalable versioning are more well-understood if they are not granular, visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We think we know that if you leverage magnetically then you may also facilitate proactively. We will seize the aptitude of e-tailers to architect. We will maximize the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "web-enabled".