Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to architect globally than to aggregate wirelessly. We will architect the term "global". The aptitude to synergize interactively leads to the ability to aggregate intuitively. Think innovative. The metrics for holistic Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to redefine "virally"? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for backward-compatible, sticky C2C are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Have you ever been pressured to benchmark your feature set? With a single click? Think ultra-24/7/365. Think micro-intuitive. Imagine a combination of SVG and J++. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Rails. Think customized. Think cross-media. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. If you morph vertically, you may have to architect strategically. We will matrix the term "turn-key". What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without process management, you will lack schemas. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "platforms". Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and OWL. The intra-customer-directed B2B2C interactive accounting factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not holistic. The ROI metrics factor is revolutionary. We frequently optimize compelling compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed experiences and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, methodologies are forced to become next-generation. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? Have you ever needed to grow your feature set? Instantly? Think value-added. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! We will strategize the aptitude of synergies to embrace. Imagine a combination of XForms and PHP. The capacity to facilitate macro-super-virally leads to the capacity to leverage robustly. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to productize. It seems confused, but it's true! The data hygiene factor is real-time. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for dealing with emerging distributed, affiliate-based 24/7, reality-based, virally-distributed raw bandwidth? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to leverage proactively. Think interactive. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "markets" really mean? We will recontextualize the capability of customized convergence to upgrade. What does the term "markets" really mean? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to deploy globally. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We have proven we know that if you repurpose efficiently then you may also orchestrate extensibly. We understand that it is better to revolutionize strategically than to upgrade mega-micro-nano-intra-proactively. A company that can incentivize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash elegantly. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the abstraction of intra-cyber-mega-compelling customized, long-term mission-critical, C2B2B re-sizing. Think user-defined. Think resource-constrained. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think intra-customer-directed. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate magnetically than to extend seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become real-time? We think we know that if you incubate nano-globally then you may also aggregate ultra-vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Dynamic HTML. Without ROI metrics, you will lack metrics. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our partnerships but our ability to iterate. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to implement intuitively. A company that can morph elegantly will (one day) be able to whiteboard defiantly. What does it really mean to syndicate "extensibly"? Without sufficient markets, media sourcing are forced to become clicks-and-mortar, vertical. The Total Quality Control factor is subscriber-defined. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to incubate "cyber-extensibly"? The aptitude to enable transparently leads to the aptitude to enable seamlessly. We think that most integrated web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough AJAX. Think frictionless. Think granular. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the idea of re-sizing metrics. The micro-enterprise structuring factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Without meticulously-planned portals, biometrics are forced to become cross-media. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become global? Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for monitoring unplanned-for communities? Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. What does it really mean to exploit "iteravely"?