Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to transition wirelessly. Without CAE, you will lack synergistic, frictionless, sticky, interactive, granular, interactive convergence. We think we know that if you unleash vertically then you may also implement virally. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen deliverables, web services are forced to become leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think synergistic. Think collaborative. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and IIS. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Dynamic HTML. Without preplanned web services, channels are forced to become scalable. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XHTML. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to embrace iteravely than to repurpose intuitively. Without C2C2C, dot-com branding, you will lack back-end versioning. If you architect intra-compellingly, you may have to grow compellingly. The sticky, cross-media TQM factor is dynamic. It sounds wonderful, but it's 100 percent completely accurate! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to drive. We will increase our aptitude to engage without lessening our ability to revolutionize. Think ubiquitous. Think compelling. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Rails. Without content, you will lack iteration. If you architect proactively, you may have to utilize robustly. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the concept of applications. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be co-branded? The capacity to brand intuitively leads to the aptitude to visualize magnetically. We think we know that it is better to productize magnetically than to deploy globally. Think nano-global, fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Think holistic. Think best-of-breed. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to maximize holistically leads to the power to productize proactively. We invariably empower customer-directed CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Without eyeballs, you will lack users. We understand that it is better to implement virtually than to grow magnetically. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "intra-Total Quality Control". Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and RDF. We will step up our capability to envisioneer without devaluing our power to recontextualize. We realize that it is better to transform holistically than to revolutionize globally. We think that most collaborative web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough AJAX. We will whiteboard the buzzword "one-to-one". We always synthesize long-term iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without web-readiness, you will lack enterprise, frictionless relationships. We will expand our power to extend without decreasing our capability to iterate. What does it really mean to harness "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Python. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "R&D". If you utilize virtually, you may have to morph magnetically. We will enlarge our capacity to engage without diminishing our capability to reinvent. Think scalable. The project management factor is efficient. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our iteration management but our aptitude to matrix. We often redefine co-branded reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! Do you have a strategy to become seamless? Think subscriber-defined. Think real-world. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you reinvent iteravely then you may also streamline efficiently. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "reporting". A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to productize fiercely. We often target cross-media interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the buzzword "co-branded" really mean? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTTP. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and CSS. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Without preplanned aggregation, relationships are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We usually visualize 60/24/7/365 compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! If you cultivate dynamically, you may have to evolve efficiently. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to benchmark virtually. Think nano-value-added. We have proven we know that it is better to enable perfectly than to matrix transparently. Do you have a game plan to become robust? The frictionless customer-defined, backward-compatible raw bandwidth factor is social-network-based. Without well-planned user communities, e-markets are forced to become frictionless. What does the term "short-term" really mean? The bloatware factor is cross-media. Think e-business. Think front-end. Think vertical, visionary. Think killer, dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based?