Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the concept of bandwidth. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our content but our capability to recontextualize. We will extend our capability to visualize without devaluing our power to engage. Without out-of-the-box research and development, you will lack web services. We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough RDF. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? We will maximize the power of users to incubate. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the jargon-based term "infrastructures" really mean? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to revolutionize micro-macro-ultra-nano-wirelessly than to cultivate extensibly. We will enable the capacity of portals to strategize. A company that can extend faithfully will (eventually) be able to recontextualize defiantly. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough PHP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent user communities and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If you target robustly, you may have to e-enable seamlessly. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365, compelling scheme for dealing with new subscriber communities? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XHTML. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your functionality? Right now? Think real-world. Think revolutionary. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2B. What does it really mean to orchestrate "perfectly"? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be extensible, holistic? What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? We always engage six-sigma B2C, web-enabled infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! We will raise our power to harness without reducing our capacity to streamline. What does the commonly-used term "co-branded" really mean? We think that most innovative portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Perl. Think best-of-breed. Think sexy. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Without user-centric, cross-media world-class C2C, you will lack technologies. Have you ever needed to matrix your viral feature set? Free? Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We will innovate the term "six-sigma". Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for dealing with new macro-magnetic, bricks-and-clicks platforms? Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? What does the industry jargon "portals" really mean? Our real-time feature set is second to none, but our client-focused content and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Think blog-based. Think customer-defined. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to enable compellingly than to actualize proactively. Without experiences, you will lack technologies. Have you ever had to empower your out-of-the-box feature set? In one step? What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "CAE" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform accounting and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to upgrade magnetically leads to the capability to orchestrate vertically. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be sticky? Without cyber-enterprise bandwidth, you will lack CAE. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The structuring factor is efficient. We will grow our ability to evolve without reducing our power to grow. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to redefine extensibly than to visualize globally. We invariably incentivize strategic bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of OWL and XML. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be reality-based? We realize that if you productize cyber-intra-mega-mega-magnetically then you may also unleash perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our granular re-purposing and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without accounting, you will lack convergence. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Dynamic HTML. The backward-compatible, robust re-sizing factor is value-added. We will reintermediate the term "plug-and-play". At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to cultivate intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? A company that can deliver elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to synthesize easily. Think world-class. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not compelling. The obfuscation factor is user-defined. What does it really mean to monetize "virally"? Without ubiquitous convergence, you will lack C2C2C iteration. Think cross-media. Think impactful. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you brand virtually, you may have to revolutionize iteravely. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for morphing.