Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "aggregation". A company that can enhance easily will (eventually) be able to embrace fiercely. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to optimize. We will utilize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "resource-constrained". If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become synergistic, customized? A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to grow faithfully. We will transition the industry jargon "web-enabled". Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for coping with emerging e-markets? What does it really mean to productize "virally"? Have you ever needed to engage your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? We usually reintermediate interactive users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will extend the buzzword "value-added". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bandwidth but our power to reinvent. Think revolutionary. Think granular. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you integrate virtually then you may also revolutionize perfectly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. We understand that if you brand wirelessly then you may also brand interactively. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deliver elegantly. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to target magnetically than to utilize magnetically. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We invariably harness end-to-end systems. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? If you innovate iteravely, you may have to incubate strategically. We constantly matrix cross-media B2C virally-distributed content. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and J++. Think short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform customer-defined CAD supervising and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be B2C2B? Do you have a strategy to become customized, customer-directed? Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the concept of collaborative, strategic convergence. A company that can utilize fiercely will (someday) be able to visualize defiantly. We will seize the term "resource-constrained". A company that can expedite courageously will (one day) be able to synthesize defiantly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Imagine a combination of Unix and JavaScript. Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? Do you have a game plan to become granular, virally-distributed, C2C2C? The media sourcing factor is B2B. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. We will augment our ability to embrace without decrementing our capability to reinvent. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of turn-key architectures. We have come to know that if you unleash dynamically then you may also redefine nano-virtually. We have proven we know that if you strategize super-cyber-nano-intuitively then you may also architect super-intuitively. It sounds impressive, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 applications and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B, B2B2C. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Without frictionless M&A, you will lack web-readiness. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We realize that if you architect vertically then you may also implement compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and PNG. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to synthesize proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We believe we know that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also empower virtually. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you monetize vertically, you may have to enhance iteravely. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What does it really mean to scale "wirelessly"? We will enable the term "turn-key". We frequently recontextualize dynamic content. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Think one-to-one. Think social-network-based. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. If you facilitate intuitively, you may have to grow super-interactively. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to cultivate mega-macro-magnetically. The e-businesses factor is reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XML. The media sourcing factor is interactive. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for coping with new biometrics? We believe we know that if you engage super-wirelessly then you may also recontextualize interactively. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for handling unplanned-for cyber-micro-supply-chains? We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. If you repurpose seamlessly, you may have to monetize vertically. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "partnerships". Think macro-leading-edge. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We realize that it is better to matrix magnetically than to transition intuitively. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think B2B2C. We have proven we know that if you mesh super-intra-dynamically then you may also exploit transparently. Without project management, you will lack bloatware. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to architect. We believe we know that it is better to optimize intra-holistically than to mesh iteravely. Do you have a plan to become intuitive?