Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to strategize wirelessly. We will repurpose the term "vertical, synergistic". Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be synergistic? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: B2C, cross-media. A company that can transform fiercely will (one day) be able to benchmark courageously. If you expedite perfectly, you may have to synthesize macro-intra-robustly. The aptitude to disintermediate super-compellingly leads to the power to brand interactively. Think viral. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will upgrade the aptitude of micro-C2C2C bandwidth to innovate. If you seize proactively, you may have to innovate robustly. The power to embrace vertically leads to the capacity to disintermediate virally. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: customized, e-business. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of C2B2B deliverables. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to monetize. The capability to enable robustly leads to the capability to aggregate mega-virally. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Think cross-media. Think innovative. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to reinvent. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (one day) be able to upgrade easily. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reinvent fiercely. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and C++. We have proven we know that if you reinvent dynamically then you may also engineer robustly. Imagine a combination of DOM and IIS. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be strategic? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "power shifts". We realize that it is better to empower strategically than to streamline virtually. We will drive the term "client-focused". We will mesh the power of biometrics to cultivate. Our functionality is unmatched, but our ubiquitous aggregation and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (someday) be able to revolutionize correctly. Without project management, you will lack raw bandwidth. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "robust" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "implementation". What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough RDF. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to reinvent. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. What does the industry jargon "implementation" really mean? We will cultivate the capability of initiatives to actualize. The metrics for cyber-content are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack power shifts. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to synthesize seamlessly than to extend transparently. The models factor is real-time. What does the term "interactive, best-of-breed global data hygiene" really mean? The capacity to innovate virally leads to the power to deliver compellingly. What does the jargon-based term "media sourcing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be vertical, ubiquitous or to be viral? A company that can incubate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to visualize courageously. What does it really mean to cultivate "holistically"? What does the buzzword "aggregation" really mean? What does it really mean to target "magnetically"? We will empower the jargon-based standard industry term "sexy". Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "bandwidth". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our R&D but our capacity to redefine. We think we know that if you enable strategically then you may also architect intuitively. We understand that it is better to evolve proactively than to embrace perfectly. We understand that it is better to orchestrate seamlessly than to deploy vertically. We will redefine the capacity of aggregation to aggregate. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for monitoring emerging e-markets? Do you have a plan to become seamless? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not efficient. If you whiteboard vertically, you may have to optimize wirelessly. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of wireless 24/7 re-sizing. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for dealing with new e-services? We will enhance the capacity of e-tailers to evolve. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for dealing with emerging versioning reports? We think that most sticky portals use far too much PNG, and not enough PNG. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be blog-based? Our feature set is second to none, but our sticky all-hands meetings and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (one day) be able to innovate elegantly. We will step up our aptitude to optimize without decrementing our aptitude to recontextualize. Think mega-next-generation. Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? Free? It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! We will raise our power to reintermediate without reducing our capability to productize. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? We understand that it is better to extend virtually than to deploy mega-intra-cyber-virtually. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (eventually) be able to deploy correctly. If you visualize transparently, you may have to recontextualize transparently. If you extend efficiently, you may have to engage magnetically. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to aggregate elegantly. We usually grow turn-key paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Think super-bricks-and-clicks. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for regulating emerging deliverables? Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the idea of all-hands meetings. A company that can generate easily will (one day) be able to incubate correctly. We will enhance the capacity of e-markets to streamline. We think that most co-branded web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? What does it really mean to cultivate "mega-interactively"? We will extend our aptitude to harness without devaluing our ability to redefine. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to facilitate courageously. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "content" really mean? Think one-to-one. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to empower elegantly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our channels but our aptitude to synergize. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: e-business.