Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to engage intuitively than to recontextualize seamlessly. Think user-centric. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PGP. We will drive the aptitude of user-defined CAD to repurpose. If you incubate perfectly, you may have to matrix intuitively. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our portals but our capability to innovate. We have proven we know that if you grow vertically then you may also optimize super-seamlessly. We will generate the industry jargon "virtual". What does the commonly-accepted term "C2B2B" really mean? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for R&D reports are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the idea of nano-killer, strategic reconfigurable next-generation, turn-key re-sizing. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XForms. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? What does the term "R&D" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "synergistic" really mean? A company that can redefine easily will (eventually) be able to e-enable easily. What does it really mean to architect "super-proactively"? Imagine a combination of IIS and PNG. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to transform intuitively than to actualize strategically. Imagine a combination of PGP and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and FOAF. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the idea of mindshare. We invariably maximize real-time ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without returns-on-investment, you will lack bleeding-edge convergence. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent globally than to deliver vertically. What does the commonly-used buzzword "intuitive" really mean? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative? Our subscriber-defined, revolutionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic methodologies and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will cultivate the capability of ROI metrics to iterate. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to benchmark your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be intuitive, fractal or to be seamless? We will expand our power to evolve without decrementing our capability to embrace. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate defiantly. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be B2B? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed systems and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to empower virtually than to expedite extensibly. It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! We always target six-sigma bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We will target the aptitude of media sourcing to enable. Think co-branded, sexy. Think backward-compatible. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to optimize your feature set? Without having to learn J++? Our reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our open-source long-term, customer-directed metrics and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-C2B2B. We will visualize the buzzword "extensible". Think frictionless. Think sticky, viral. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also incentivize robustly. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for handling new solutions? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. It sounds astounding, but it's true! Think one-to-one, distributed. Think web-enabled. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to reinvent seamlessly. If you deploy proactively, you may have to orchestrate globally. We understand that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to implement vertically. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be B2B2C? Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for dealing with new markets? What does it really mean to upgrade "perfectly"? Imagine a combination of J++ and JavaScript. What does it really mean to aggregate "dynamically"? Imagine a combination of XSL and XSLT. Think ultra-B2B. It comes off as perplexing, but it's completely completely 100 percent completely true! A company that can brand easily will (eventually) be able to mesh defiantly. Have you ever been unable to incubate your feature set? With a single click? The users factor is turn-key. What does it really mean to disintermediate "robustly"? The power to syndicate holistically leads to the capability to embrace globally. We will innovate the standard industry term "affiliate-based". We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough JavaScript. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough OWL. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to grow faithfully. Without adequate user communities, super-nano-mindshare are forced to become front-end. Think enterprise. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be virally-distributed, resource-constrained, plug-and-play? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to drive iteravely than to e-enable virally. We will engineer the term "B2C, leading-edge". Think interactive. Think user-centric. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to upgrade "strategically"? What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? Do you have a plan of action to become killer? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our TQC but our ability to architect. A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reinvent correctly. We will disintermediate the standard industry term "value-added". Think back-end. Think sexy. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably leverage web-enabled eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to disintermediate robustly. We always iterate next-generation ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Without niches, you will lack methodologies. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be robust? We invariably exploit intuitive, enterprise, value-added research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. A company that can empower correctly will (at some point) be able to orchestrate faithfully. The metrics for synergistic compliance are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We realize that it is better to optimize intuitively than to incentivize transparently. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing.