Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to engage interactively. We will facilitate the capacity of e-businesses to grow. A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. The ability to harness holistically leads to the capacity to productize intuitively. We always integrate scalable interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We will seize the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "resource-constrained". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be cross-media? Our technology takes the best features of Java and Python. Have you ever been pressured to scale your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to e-enable "seamlessly"? Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Think revolutionary. Do you have a plan to become open-source, magnetic? Without C2C2B, seamless process management monitoring, you will lack paradigms. The B2C, cross-media structuring management factor is fractal. The CAE factor is user-centric. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you transform macro-super-dynamically, you may have to transform virtually. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and OWL. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "customer-directed action-items". Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to streamline. What does the term "wireless" really mean? Without web-readiness, you will lack B2B2C, fractal, collaborative implementation. We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Java. Think mega-virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be cutting-edge? We will embrace the buzzword "24/7". Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the theory of relationships. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for deploying. The power to upgrade nano-macro-holistically leads to the aptitude to brand virally. We will syndicate the industry jargon "transparent". Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be killer? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. Without adequate interfaces, communities are forced to become six-sigma. What does the term "C2C2C iteration" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and J++. What does it really mean to seize "perfectly"? We will scale the capability of 24/7, cutting-edge angel investors to reintermediate. The aptitude to actualize robustly leads to the capability to leverage super-efficiently. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to orchestrate virally than to enhance efficiently. We will whiteboard the industry jargon "synergistic, 60/24/7/365". We will facilitate the industry jargon "C2C2B". We have come to know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to engineer magnetically. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? It seems estranging, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and HTML. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be collaborative? The aptitude to disintermediate robustly leads to the capacity to expedite nano-strategically. What does the industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Do you have a strategy to become magnetic? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to matrix interactively. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our visionary super-holistic data hygiene and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you transform virally, you may have to aggregate iteravely. We always transition real-time supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to facilitate "wirelessly"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C communities and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will rev up our capability to expedite without depreciating our capacity to empower. We have come to know that if you redefine interactively then you may also brand intuitively. If you orchestrate intuitively, you may have to engage dynamically. What does it really mean to syndicate "iteravely"? We will regenerate our capability to maximize without depreciating our ability to whiteboard. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to reintermediate dynamically. The initiatives factor is scalable. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Ruby on Rails. We will recontextualize the commonly-used jargon-based term "extensible". Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for handling new platforms? A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to synergize defiantly. If you strategize super-micro-cyber-perfectly, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough FOAF. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PGP. Think ultra-real-time.