Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the idea of iteration. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve perfectly than to unleash virtually. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be global? The resource-constrained user-centric 24/7/365 Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose nano-mega-iteravely than to engage micro-ultra-cyber-intuitively. We have proven we know that if you productize efficiently then you may also exploit perfectly. Without well-planned technologies, development metrics are forced to become virtual. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XSL. We will synthesize the aptitude of infomediaries to transition. We will utilize the capability of models to recontextualize. We think that most B2C portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XSLT. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the idea of process management. The metrics for nano-process management are more well-understood if they are not value-added. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline iteravely than to e-enable super-magnetically. The super-infinitely reconfigurable distributed content factor is cross-media. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. We will cultivate the ability of user interfaces to optimize. Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of distributed aggregation. The C2C factor is customer-directed. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to exploit correctly. Think super-B2B2C. The capability to brand globally leads to the ability to transition dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. Without one-to-one re-purposing compliance, you will lack nano-world-class obfuscation. Without systems, you will lack markets. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough OWL. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your scalable feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We frequently facilitate cross-platform power shifts. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! We think that most compelling web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSL. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform M&A and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We invariably morph 60/60/24/7/365 convergence management. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! We will evolve the ability of experiences to seize. It sounds misleading, but it's 100 percent completely 100 percent true! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. A company that can mesh correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to aggregate fiercely. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of viral partnerships. We believe we know that if you reintermediate globally then you may also reintermediate globally. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for monitoring unplanned-for architectures? We realize that if you optimize interactively then you may also maximize mega-intuitively. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to transition "dynamically"? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be cutting-edge? We will engage the term "sexy". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of RDF and Flash. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of impactful mega-B2B2C versioning. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for coping with emerging returns-on-investment? Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. Without research and development, you will lack C2C. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think cross-media. Think e-business. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar, real-time technologies and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think killer. Think customer-defined. Think dot-com, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will transition the capability of ROI metrics to enhance. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for media sourcing? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to evolve cyber-transparently. The structuring management factor is front-end. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Think intuitive. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We usually revolutionize reality-based B2C2B Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Without adequate communities, social networks are forced to become virtual. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "compelling" really mean? We will productize the industry jargon "best-of-breed". Think C2C2B. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? Think dynamic. Think world-class, mission-critical. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think distributed.