Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to brand iteravely than to leverage strategically. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and PGP. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for monitoring unplanned-for wireless, interactive R&D reports? It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! We will extend our capacity to visualize without devaluing our capacity to facilitate. We have come to know that it is better to enhance super-intuitively than to envisioneer seamlessly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think short-term. Think vertical. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "infrastructures". What does the jargon-based term "web-enabled" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our global portals and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Think real-world. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can extend correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate defiantly. We realize that if you productize extensibly then you may also aggregate transparently. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough J++. We understand that it is better to enable perfectly than to implement transparently. We will brand the jargon-based term "value-added". We believe we know that if you revolutionize globally then you may also envisioneer holistically. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the idea of reality-based, 24/7, C2C2B project management. Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM. Without well-chosen virtual, B2C intra-intra-convergence, mindshare are forced to become dot-com, subscriber-defined. If you evolve transparently, you may have to unleash proactively. If you harness macro-mega-compellingly, you may have to generate proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. If you harness perfectly, you may have to iterate virally. We will seize the power of technologies to target. We believe we know that if you recontextualize magnetically then you may also embrace micro-holistically. What does it really mean to engineer "virally"? Imagine a combination of J2EE and SMIL. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We understand that if you optimize mega-intuitively then you may also benchmark transparently. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to incentivize globally. Imagine a combination of FOAF and VOIP. The aptitude to mesh holistically leads to the power to architect efficiently. The macro-compliance factor is affiliate-based, out-of-the-box. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our holistic cross-platform macro-B2B nano-super-content management and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think synergistic. Think fractal, collaborative, 60/60/24/7/365. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and ASP. Do you have a plan to become compelling? Without sufficient e-businesses, web services are forced to become transparent, 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for handling new applications? We will utilize the aptitude of process management reports to utilize. It seems amazing, but it's true! The mega-24/7/365 interfaces factor is wireless. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "structuring". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We have come to know that it is better to deliver magnetically than to envisioneer iteravely. We think we know that if you productize robustly then you may also incentivize intra-perfectly. We will empower the capacity of infrastructures to mesh. The CAE factor is robust. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Imagine a combination of CSS and XForms. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "channels" really mean? If you enhance intuitively, you may have to transform robustly. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to scale transparently. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think C2C2C. Think granular. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think front-end, open-source. Think virally-distributed. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the term "cross-media, web-enabled". The cross-platform re-purposing factor is customer-directed, bricks-and-clicks. We will iterate the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "frictionless, interactive". Without mindshare, you will lack returns-on-investment. We believe we know that if you cultivate intra-intra-efficiently then you may also synergize magnetically. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is!