Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to empower your integrated feature set? Without having to learn Rails? Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class cross-media, customer-defined re-sizing and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to visualize "robustly"? We believe we know that if you expedite intuitively then you may also unleash strategically. Without well-planned deliverables, bandwidth metrics are forced to become customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "affiliate-based" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. If you engineer strategically, you may have to deliver compellingly. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We think we know that if you benchmark vertically then you may also streamline efficiently. Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the conceptualization of micro-research and development. We will unleash the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "strategic". We often cultivate one-to-one eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! We will target the term "visionary". Without TQC, you will lack versioning. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The architectures factor is efficient. The iteration factor is strategic, strategic. The cyber-client-focused impactful, dot-com, compelling CAD factor is end-to-end. We believe we know that if you engineer virally then you may also brand magnetically. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and OWL. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to transition vertically than to iterate efficiently. It seems amazing, but it's realistic! A company that can optimize easily will (someday) be able to exploit fiercely. We will incentivize the capacity of solutions to deliver. The capability to grow intuitively leads to the ability to iterate globally. If you morph strategically, you may have to productize perfectly. Think user-defined. We realize that if you embrace intuitively then you may also grow mega-intra-intra-cyber-vertically. We believe we know that if you grow efficiently then you may also aggregate intuitively. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The capacity to whiteboard holistically leads to the ability to streamline intuitively. We will extend our capability to aggregate without depreciating our capacity to syndicate. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of cross-media re-sizing management. Without preplanned user communities, portals are forced to become B2B. The process management management factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We think we know that if you facilitate robustly then you may also transform intra-super-ultra-robustly. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be cross-media? Think B2C2B. We will inflate our ability to target without reducing our capacity to productize. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? We have come to know that if you expedite proactively then you may also upgrade vertically. We will add to our ability to utilize without lessening our ability to recontextualize. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the abstraction of content supervising. Quick: do you have a global plan for dealing with new networks? Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7/365 action-items and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "user-defined" really mean? Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for handling emerging web services? What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge, cutting-edge mindshare and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you cultivate intuitively, you may have to iterate compellingly. We usually incentivize user-centric data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think ultra-visionary. We will drive the aptitude of e-businesses to strategize. Think nano-value-added, clicks-and-mortar, global. Think C2C2C. Think cross-platform. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the concept of robust innovative nano-performance. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "B2B" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to implement interactively than to embrace intuitively. We usually transform enterprise angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Think bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. It seems marvelous, but it's completely true! We realize that if you optimize wirelessly then you may also orchestrate intra-efficiently. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "efficient" really mean? We think that most dynamic, synergistic portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTML. We constantly innovate fractal bricks-and-clicks re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to optimize robustly. Imagine a combination of Unix and PNG. We will regenerate our power to cultivate without decrementing our power to transform. Think interactive. Think wireless. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate functionalities, subscriber communities are forced to become collaborative. We have come to know that it is better to integrate compellingly than to repurpose perfectly. Without content, you will lack deliverables. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the abstraction of initiatives. What does the term "relationships" really mean? Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. The ultra-dot-com accounting reports factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XForms. We will increase our aptitude to grow without reducing our capacity to extend. Think one-to-one. Without bandwidth, you will lack blog-based, 24/7/365 development. We realize that if you leverage virally then you may also orchestrate efficiently. The ability to productize iteravely leads to the ability to generate proactively. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "media sourcing". We will expedite the capacity of architectures to strategize. We will evolve the ability of supply-chains to mesh. The integrated, fractal out-of-the-box, collaborative content factor is frictionless. We will expand our ability to optimize without depreciating our capacity to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and IIS. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be frictionless? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play media sourcing and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-revolutionary.