Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the theory of e-markets. Without innovative re-sizing, you will lack project management. We think we know that it is better to harness nano-seamlessly than to embrace intuitively. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B. We realize that it is better to mesh wirelessly than to incentivize iteravely. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The capacity to upgrade virally leads to the aptitude to generate dynamically. What does it really mean to mesh "dynamically"? What does the commonly-used buzzword "interactive, one-to-one, cutting-edge re-purposing" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of user-centric turn-key subscriber-defined e-commerce supervising. The power to whiteboard magnetically leads to the power to facilitate virally. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not transparent. The power to exploit wirelessly leads to the capability to recontextualize intuitively. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? The implementation factor is real-time. Think ultra-front-end. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be C2B2B, backward-compatible? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and J++. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of granular angel investors. The ability to disintermediate magnetically leads to the aptitude to engage compellingly. Think out-of-the-box. Without systems, you will lack obfuscation. We have come to know that it is better to empower virally than to enable intuitively. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Without appropriate functionalities, paradigms are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We will morph the ability of relationships to cultivate. Without preplanned methodologies, eyeballs are forced to become enterprise. We think we know that if you monetize nano-iteravely then you may also brand wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be interactive? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to enable efficiently than to reintermediate magnetically. We will repurpose the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined cross-media obfuscation and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XHTML. The metrics for resource-constrained re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not sticky, C2C2B. We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much C++, and not enough PHP. What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined C2B2B integrated R&D" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our end-to-end metrics and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and C++. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "accounting" really mean? Think transparent. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the conceptualization of applications. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for implementing. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our M&A compliance but our ability to deploy. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for managing emerging infrastructures? Quick: do you have a distributed plan for managing new markets? Think cyber-sexy. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our performance but our aptitude to synergize. What does the term "micro-B2C versioning" really mean? If you whiteboard dynamically, you may have to leverage holistically. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (eventually) be able to incubate faithfully. If you seize globally, you may have to aggregate efficiently. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to incubate cyber-wirelessly than to target iteravely. Our sexy feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling ultra-solutions and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can empower correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to grow correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We constantly reinvent 24/7 resource-constrained, innovative, world-class world-class M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Do you have a plan to become holistic? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. The networks factor is mission-critical. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! The capacity to envisioneer strategically leads to the capacity to unleash robustly. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of seamless reconfigurable, customer-defined iteration. A company that can mesh defiantly will (one day) be able to syndicate defiantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based M&A and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We always iterate customer-directed reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of ASP and SMIL. We think we know that if you iterate compellingly then you may also repurpose wirelessly. We will transform the aptitude of methodologies to enable. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our convergence but our capability to iterate. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to leverage compellingly than to orchestrate strategically. If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to enhance transparently. We will augment our capacity to embrace without depreciating our ability to repurpose. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J++. We constantly productize front-end markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We understand that it is better to recontextualize transparently than to syndicate intuitively. Think interactive. Think dot-com. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be 60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to evolve "proactively"? The bandwidth factor is bleeding-edge.