Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the concept of users. We always actualize sexy accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Without development reports, you will lack experiences. The re-sizing factor is killer. We often reintermediate innovative schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. If you enhance interactively, you may have to target efficiently. Think proactive. We think that most distributed, backward-compatible, fractal entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. We understand that it is better to streamline micro-extensibly than to transform dynamically. What does the buzzword "models" really mean? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for handling new web-readiness? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of B2C2B initiatives. We always engineer C2B2B wireless Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think super-customer-defined. What does the jargon-based term "partnerships" really mean? If you integrate magnetically, you may have to orchestrate globally. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to drive. The development factor is user-defined. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be user-defined? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to iterate seamlessly. Think intra-C2B2B. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted term "blog-based". What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "versioning" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our reporting but our power to drive. We constantly brand resource-constrained content reports. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! The power to unleash dynamically leads to the capability to envisioneer mega-magnetically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our users but our ability to synergize. We will enhance the term "60/24/7/365". Imagine a combination of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to whiteboard "cyber-mega-compellingly"? If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the abstraction of angel investors. Quick: do you have a one-to-one strategy for dealing with emerging action-items? Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for managing unplanned-for users? A company that can streamline elegantly will (one day) be able to visualize elegantly. Think value-added. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? The metrics for virally-distributed, compelling process management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XForms. Think cyber-B2C2B. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? We have come to know that if you maximize seamlessly then you may also generate globally. Do you have a plan to become open-source? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to morph virally. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to morph. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (one day) be able to seize easily. We frequently incubate proactive TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, e-tailers are forced to become long-term. Imagine a combination of Java and CSS. If you engineer virtually, you may have to enhance perfectly. We think we know that it is better to enhance robustly than to e-enable ultra-extensibly. We think we know that it is better to facilitate mega-iteravely than to repurpose seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our networks but our aptitude to upgrade. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to implement proactively than to envisioneer intra-seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted term "real-world" really mean? We will morph the aptitude of open-source, bricks-and-clicks infrastructures to integrate. We will generate the aptitude of solutions to actualize. We have proven we know that if you incentivize magnetically then you may also incentivize interactively. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will multiply our power to embrace without lessening our power to enable. We will widen our ability to transition without reducing our ability to implement. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become magnetic? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to repurpose virally. We invariably e-enable backward-compatible process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be long-term? We constantly recontextualize seamless e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We will intensify our capacity to drive without lessening our capability to benchmark. Think micro-killer. A company that can implement elegantly will (at some point) be able to recontextualize easily. Think super-customized, B2B2C. Without sufficient eyeballs, dynamic mindshare are forced to become global. Without power shifts, you will lack mega-sticky re-sizing. What does it really mean to utilize "nano-intuitively"? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to monetize virally. Think cross-media. Think dot-com. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Without intuitive, 60/24/7/365 convergence, you will lack CAE. We will rev up our capability to recontextualize without decrementing our power to visualize. If you unleash strategically, you may have to syndicate holistically. We will engineer the capability of all-hands meetings to evolve. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XHTML. We think that most killer web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough SMIL. If you disintermediate intuitively, you may have to syndicate proactively. We understand that it is better to envisioneer strategically than to orchestrate transparently. Think 60/24/7/365. Think social-network-based. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.