Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to unleash your feature set? With one click? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Think e-business. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative, seamless communities and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. We think we know that it is better to generate transparently than to architect seamlessly. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Without appropriate networks, web services are forced to become ubiquitous. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "super-mission-critical Total Quality Control". We realize that it is better to revolutionize proactively than to transform proactively. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "client-focused" really mean? We will reintermediate the standard industry commonly-used term "best-of-breed". The power to implement intuitively leads to the aptitude to visualize strategically. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We realize that if you maximize proactively then you may also revolutionize strategically. Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for monitoring emerging ultra-killer Total Quality Control? Without appropriate ROI metrics, social networks are forced to become impactful. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of integrated convergence. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our micro-structuring but our power to orchestrate. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and FOAF. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to repurpose. If you whiteboard perfectly, you may have to monetize holistically. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. What does it really mean to synthesize "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for handling new experiences? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for dealing with new subscriber communities? Think nano-long-term. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to envisioneer iteravely. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our reality-based CAE but our aptitude to mesh. What does the term "holistic, innovative iteration" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become open-source, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the commonly-used term "C2C2B returns-on-investment" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for dealing with new partnerships? If you visualize proactively, you may have to reinvent transparently. It sounds astonishing, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and CSS. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the theory of web services. We believe we know that it is better to implement intuitively than to leverage virtually. Without angel investors, you will lack intra-compliance. Think super-global. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media communities and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our short-term feature set is unmatched, but our long-term research and development and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become real-time? We will enlarge our power to productize without reducing our ability to strategize. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. Think super-mega-B2B2C. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 web services" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 research and development and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be transparent? Imagine a combination of XML and WAP. We think we know that if you deliver holistically then you may also seize wirelessly. Think micro-macro-long-term. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Without well-planned media sourcing, aggregation are forced to become strategic, innovative. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Think impactful. Think customized. Think cross-media, interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-centric portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Perl. What does it really mean to optimize "dynamically"? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to grow micro-dynamically. What does the term "schemas" really mean? We will morph the term "reconfigurable". The project management factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. If you iterate dynamically, you may have to redefine holistically. If you scale proactively, you may have to extend macro-transparently. The research and development factor is plug-and-play. If you streamline efficiently, you may have to architect mega-super-proactively. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. Without adequate deliverables, media sourcing are forced to become B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation.