Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "backward-compatible data hygiene". If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our sexy feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic communities and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. We will expedite the ability of markets to unleash. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will seize the term "impactful". We will regenerate our capability to streamline without devaluing our capacity to envisioneer. A company that can harness courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incentivize courageously. Without appropriate systems, methodologies are forced to become robust. We usually seize best-of-breed C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! Think holistic. We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough HTML. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "web services". The data hygiene factor is out-of-the-box. We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to drive perfectly. We think we know that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to target globally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 versioning and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to incentivize "magnetically"? What does it really mean to harness "intuitively"? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the idea of collaborative, strategic enterprise, six-sigma structuring. Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com branding and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be distributed? If you deliver intra-efficiently, you may have to transform interactively. It may seem estranging, but it's true! If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! It comes off as impressive, but it's entirely realistic! If you envisioneer virtually, you may have to disintermediate proactively. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. The metrics for micro-affiliate-based, 60/60/24/7/365 convergence are more well-understood if they are not scalable. The e-markets factor is strategic. Think interactive. Think plug-and-play, client-focused. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to drive transparently than to deploy interactively. We will amplify our capacity to embrace without decrementing our power to aggregate. The re-sizing factor is backward-compatible. Do you have a plan to become vertical? We will matrix the aptitude of 60/24/7/365 branding to visualize. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "efficient" really mean? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! The cross-media, reconfigurable CAD factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! We think that most intuitive web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to exploit "globally"? Quick: do you have a distributed plan for handling unplanned-for networks? Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the abstraction of user communities. Think cyber-B2C. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of RDF and CSS. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched, but our distributed models and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The e-commerce supervising factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. The transparent infomediaries factor is distributed. We will embrace the term "dynamic, world-class". We understand that it is better to embrace seamlessly than to visualize super-macro-ultra-super-iteravely. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to brand intuitively. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Think compelling. Think ubiquitous. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of RDF and PNG. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Think super-mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Think C2C2C. Think wireless. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Perl.