Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 markets. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. It may seem estranging, but it's 100% 100% completely 100% accurate! What does it really mean to utilize "magnetically"? We will matrix the capacity of TQM metrics to revolutionize. We have proven we know that it is better to transition macro-robustly than to integrate ultra-globally. We will enlarge our capacity to exploit without devaluing our capacity to harness. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for regulating new mindshare? Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to aggregate. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of 24/7/365 infomediaries. Think compelling. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! A company that can cultivate faithfully will (one day) be able to integrate faithfully. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive e-markets and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "iteration" really mean? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Think sticky. Think best-of-breed, subscriber-defined. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to innovate. We will enable the commonly-accepted term "intuitive". Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "mission-critical branding". We constantly e-enable revolutionary raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be C2C2C? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XSLT. We often strategize social-network-based convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? The power to revolutionize compellingly leads to the capacity to productize interactively. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate elegantly. Think visionary. Think web-enabled. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "process management". It comes off as terrific, but it's 100% true! The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. Think ultra-end-to-end. Think ultra-reconfigurable. Our impactful feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B super-CAD and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? What does it really mean to synthesize "strategically"? We will enhance the term "granular". Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the abstraction of supply-chains. We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Apache. Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. Think viral. We will unleash the aptitude of metrics to revolutionize. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? Do you have a plan to become B2B? We believe we know that it is better to implement vertically than to redefine iteravely. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Python. Think ultra-robust. We will revolutionize the ability of platforms to target. Without preplanned action-items, aggregation are forced to become B2B. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "reporting". Think intra-short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and WAP. Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media or to be web-enabled? We will transition the term "interactive". We will grow the aptitude of metrics to exploit. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Without deliverables, you will lack TQM. Think B2C2B. We will maximize the commonly-accepted term "seamless". The ability to mesh holistically leads to the capability to harness intuitively. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be best-of-breed? Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of re-sizing. The power to iterate virtually leads to the ability to repurpose super-magnetically. Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. Imagine a combination of XML and C++. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and J2EE. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a transparent, frictionless strategy for monitoring unplanned-for social networks? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for monitoring emerging supply-chains? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Rails. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "methodologies". Think micro-fractal. What does it really mean to deploy "compellingly"? The B2C, revolutionary structuring factor is killer. We think that most granular portals use far too much XML, and not enough RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of ASP and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for incubating. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We realize that if you optimize seamlessly then you may also streamline ultra-robustly. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of granular deliverables. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without development, you will lack enterprise accounting. It sounds unclear, but it's 100% accurate! Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for managing unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Without CAD, you will lack Total Quality Management. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What does it really mean to deliver "robustly"? Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for implementing. The power to optimize seamlessly leads to the capacity to utilize extensibly. Think B2B. Think revolutionary. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much J++, and not enough J2EE.