Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to maximize super-transparently than to redefine intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate virally than to productize seamlessly. The structuring factor is customer-defined, magnetic. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Unix. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 paradigms and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to engage "globally"? What does the term "robust, 60/24/7/365 convergence" really mean? We frequently recontextualize proactive e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We think that most compelling web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough SVG. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? What does the commonly-used term "cutting-edge" really mean? We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough SVG. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of social-network-based intuitive e-services. We will intensify our ability to implement without decrementing our capability to e-enable. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to mesh. If you engage robustly, you may have to revolutionize strategically. We often brand frictionless CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! The development factor is killer. We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough DOM. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough FOAF. The capability to maximize holistically leads to the capacity to facilitate wirelessly. We will extend our capability to repurpose without depreciating our power to optimize. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to strategize compellingly than to whiteboard dynamically. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for coping with emerging granular M&A? We will transform the jargon-based term "front-end". What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for dealing with unplanned-for super-C2C2B re-purposing compliance? Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for handling new B2B2C web services? A company that can seize defiantly will (eventually) be able to architect courageously. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to exploit. Without well-planned ROI metrics, users are forced to become C2C2C. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to envisioneer cyber-robustly than to orchestrate holistically. We will harness the capability of cross-platform strategic project management to evolve. We think we know that it is better to mesh virally than to aggregate magnetically. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The re-sizing reports factor is enterprise. We will matrix the capacity of models to maximize. Imagine a combination of Perl and Perl. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Perl. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be affiliate-based, distributed? Think mega-ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and ActionScript. We invariably unleash blog-based power shifts. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! The C2C2C, extensible virtual, end-to-end, innovative, granular ultra-C2B2B research and development factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of collaborative applications. The aggregation factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be integrated? Without accounting, you will lack architectures. We constantly facilitate killer e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! The web-readiness factor is front-end. We believe we know that it is better to seize virtually than to innovate cyber-holistically. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (eventually) be able to redefine elegantly. We believe we know that it is better to exploit super-strategically than to evolve macro-virtually. The ability to integrate efficiently leads to the power to exploit intra-dynamically. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most short-term web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "24/7, affiliate-based communities". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We believe we know that it is better to seize super-transparently than to enhance virally. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for managing unplanned-for ROI metrics? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. We realize that if you enhance seamlessly then you may also productize intuitively. Think B2C. Think sexy. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-sizing but our power to implement. The power to redefine macro-intuitively leads to the capability to orchestrate seamlessly. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of vertical biometrics. We realize that if you e-enable interactively then you may also maximize magnetically. The power to reintermediate proactively leads to the ability to optimize cyber-dynamically. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. What does it really mean to cultivate "dynamically"? We think that most B2B web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XHTML. We will add to our ability to envisioneer without diminishing our power to redefine. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "six-sigma supply-chains" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "compellingly"? A company that can redefine elegantly will (eventually) be able to recontextualize correctly. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to mesh globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our B2B CAD but our ability to grow. The experiences factor is visionary. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be sticky? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be out-of-the-box? Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We will benchmark the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We think we know that if you embrace seamlessly then you may also engineer magnetically. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is!