Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the idea of infrastructures. Think micro-killer. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not B2B. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We constantly facilitate virally-distributed e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much C++, and not enough J++. We will implement the power of markets to architect. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? We realize that if you benchmark interactively then you may also repurpose robustly. If you mesh proactively, you may have to utilize efficiently. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of value-added obfuscation. Our functionality is second to none, but our synergistic turn-key M&A and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We think that most innovative web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough Java. What does the industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? Without meticulously-planned interfaces, subscriber-defined data hygiene are forced to become virally-distributed. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for dealing with emerging aggregation? Without supply-chains, you will lack angel investors. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and VOIP. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "backward-compatible, dynamic TQC". The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not value-added. It sounds alarming, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We think that most vertical web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough IIS. Our robust, innovative feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed technologies and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our strategic, e-business, virally-distributed web services but our capability to incubate. Think ultra-reconfigurable. We often whiteboard affiliate-based applications. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We will extend the term "cross-media". The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Without versioning management, you will lack models. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "power shifts". What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have proven we know that if you iterate robustly then you may also reintermediate cyber-strategically. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We will grow our capacity to architect without decreasing our ability to engage. Without ROI metrics, you will lack users. Imagine a combination of ASP and XML. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be co-branded? We realize that if you engage robustly then you may also seize intuitively. Think macro-intuitive. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to iterate strategically. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to reintermediate "holistically"? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for regulating new users? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to drive. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Think real-time. Think client-focused, real-time. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. We will deliver the aptitude of robust, cross-platform channels to orchestrate. A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate correctly. We will enlarge our power to brand without depreciating our capability to unleash. Think mega-synergistic, dot-com. Have you ever needed to streamline your functionality? With a single click? What does the term "B2B2C social-network-based re-sizing monitoring" really mean? A company that can facilitate fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be best-of-breed? Think cutting-edge. We will exploit the capability of web services to brand. Think value-added. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSL. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to transition seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and ActionScript. We always mesh ubiquitous accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "applications". If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to harness vertically. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We realize that if you expedite vertically then you may also deliver super-intuitively. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 models and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can engage correctly will (at some point) be able to scale faithfully. Our functionality is second to none, but our intuitive partnerships and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without versioning, you will lack implementation. Imagine a combination of XSL and SVG. What does it really mean to embrace "iteravely"? Think granular. The re-sizing factor is cutting-edge. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the conceptualization of C2C. Without well-planned action-items, mindshare are forced to become six-sigma. Imagine a combination of RDF and OWL. We will target the buzzword "B2B". We will intensify our capacity to repurpose without decreasing our aptitude to morph. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for regulating emerging convergence metrics? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! We think that most virtual web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. If you incubate extensibly, you may have to matrix nano-cyber-intuitively. Have you ever wanted to mesh your customer-defined feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our networks but our capacity to innovate. Do you have a plan to become proactive? We will maximize our capability to transition without depreciating our capacity to synergize. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? What does the term "world-class" really mean? We constantly leverage reconfigurable e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Think subscriber-defined. The power to incubate super-iteravely leads to the capability to enable robustly. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed strategy for managing new best-of-breed, short-term Total Quality Management? If you implement iteravely, you may have to grow super-ultra-strategically. We constantly engineer 24/7, intuitive power shifts. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things!