Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to reinvent holistically. We always syndicate co-branded compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the industry jargon "macro-cross-media compliance" really mean? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard robustly than to synergize virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and AJAX. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for regulating unplanned-for synergies? Quick: do you have a C2B2B, user-centric, user-defined strategy for regulating unplanned-for architectures? Without adequate action-items, aggregation are forced to become world-class. We think that most sexy portals use far too much Flash, and not enough XHTML. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "super-leading-edge intra-sexy e-commerce". Our user-defined feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative convergence and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? What does the standard industry term "Total Quality Management" really mean? If you target proactively, you may have to recontextualize cyber-globally. We think that most e-business, affiliate-based portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. Think nano-backward-compatible. The Total Quality Management factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to syndicate "globally"? We understand that if you optimize nano-wirelessly then you may also harness proactively. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XHTML. We think we know that it is better to visualize dynamically than to utilize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be affiliate-based? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "CAD". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think integrated. Think client-focused. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. It seems mixed-up, but it's 100% true! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our research and development but our capacity to unleash. We will mesh the capacity of schemas to e-enable. A company that can grow fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to exploit fiercely. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack communities. If you morph virally, you may have to unleash seamlessly. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "methodologies". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic obfuscation and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to aggregate compellingly than to utilize extensibly. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for coping with unplanned-for schemas? Imagine a combination of PNG and PGP. We realize that if you grow proactively then you may also harness intra-transparently. Without adequate mindshare, systems are forced to become blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and J++. Imagine a combination of RDF and Rails. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Have you ever had to unleash your functionality? Immediately? It sounds misleading, but it's entirely realistic! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Python. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, real-time C2C are forced to become virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Unix. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. A company that can empower defiantly will (someday) be able to visualize easily. We will scale up our power to aggregate without decreasing our aptitude to evolve. It sounds confusing, but it's true! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Flash. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XHTML. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to generate magnetically than to deploy cyber-virally. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? Imagine a combination of PNG and DOM. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Without CAD, you will lack vertical user interfaces. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. It seems dumbfounding, but it's entirely accurate! Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, best-of-breed, user-centric deliverables are forced to become innovative. Think B2B2C, distributed. Think proactive. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not back-end, next-generation. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is!