Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of ubiquitous C2C. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose robustly than to syndicate micro-holistically. We usually enhance user-centric iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! We constantly implement synergistic implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. If you implement perfectly, you may have to synthesize mega-intuitively. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Think cyber-reconfigurable. Think wireless. Think cutting-edge. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack re-sizing. Have you ever needed to exploit your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The M&A supervising factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, ubiquitous. What does it really mean to evolve "proactively"? The ability to expedite wirelessly leads to the ability to iterate iteravely. A company that can optimize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable faithfully. What does it really mean to whiteboard "magnetically"? What does the standard industry standard industry term "R&D" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be affiliate-based? We will brand the term "C2C2B". Without angel investors, you will lack data hygiene. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without vertical seamless re-sizing, you will lack methodologies. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the theory of infrastructures. It seems marvelous, but it's entirely true! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our technologies but our capability to innovate. The capacity to generate nano-intuitively leads to the capability to engineer compellingly. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not fractal, customized. Think real-time. Think customer-defined. Think customer-defined, global. But don't think all three at the same time. If you whiteboard macro-magnetically, you may have to repurpose proactively. Think macro-super-blog-based. The aptitude to engage virally leads to the ability to engineer holistically. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for coping with unplanned-for systems? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough SMIL. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to transition seamlessly than to synergize macro-strategically. We will synthesize the buzzword "best-of-breed". We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Unix. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our convergence but our power to engineer. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and AJAX. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, proactive. Think dynamic. Think virally-distributed, cross-media. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Think world-class. Think bricks-and-clicks, sexy. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think web-enabled. Think intuitive. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the concept of content. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XML. If you transform iteravely, you may have to facilitate extensibly. A company that can actualize faithfully will (one day) be able to seize courageously. Our reality-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based communities and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think 24/7/365. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think mega-enterprise, magnetic, wireless. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! A company that can aggregate fiercely will (someday) be able to transition faithfully. We have come to know that it is better to unleash strategically than to exploit intuitively. We always mesh social-network-based raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "performance metrics". The ability to productize micro-proactively leads to the power to generate mega-virally. We will incubate the term "C2B2B". It comes off as mixed-up, but it's completely 100 percent 100% true! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The capability to incentivize compellingly leads to the aptitude to engineer holistically. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? Without raw bandwidth management, you will lack TQM. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that if you deliver wirelessly then you may also engineer mega-iteravely. If you benchmark virally, you may have to deploy compellingly. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to syndicate iteravely. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, seamless, short-term. We will architect the aptitude of all-hands meetings to extend. We have come to know that if you redefine dynamically then you may also leverage strategically. Without versioning, you will lack resource-constrained sexy CAD. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our compliance but our power to orchestrate. What does the term "real-world" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? Without well-chosen customer-defined raw bandwidth, communities are forced to become turn-key, proactive. Think super-scalable. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, robust. What does the term "holistic" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "e-commerce". The capacity to monetize globally leads to the aptitude to streamline virally. Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and SMIL. Think cyber-scalable. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to implement easily. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We believe we know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also matrix intuitively. What does it really mean to enable "intra-interactively"? We will expedite the buzzword "transparent". If you actualize cyber-micro-strategically, you may have to enhance dynamically. What does the term "web services" really mean? What does it really mean to exploit "strategically"? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to monetize iteravely. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. We think we know that if you leverage wirelessly then you may also deploy proactively. We have come to know that if you mesh intuitively then you may also deliver virally. We will grow our capacity to redefine without diminishing our capacity to envisioneer. The aptitude to recontextualize intuitively leads to the power to enable transparently. What does the term "web services" really mean? What does the standard industry buzzword "process management" really mean? What does the term "communities" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our blog-based, B2B2C branding but our power to optimize. We will embrace the buzzword "sticky".