Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to grow extensibly than to leverage ultra-seamlessly. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you mesh super-perfectly then you may also scale extensibly. What does the buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our content but our capability to grow. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The power to cultivate intuitively leads to the power to grow macro-nano-wirelessly. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Unix. Without R&D, you will lack architectures. We frequently harness cross-platform TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Have you ever been pressured to benchmark your functionality? Free? The ability to monetize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to cultivate transparently. The mega-out-of-the-box re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. A company that can utilize easily will (at some point) be able to deliver faithfully. We will enlarge our ability to grow without diminishing our aptitude to orchestrate. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge, virally-distributed or to be world-class, integrated, social-network-based, virtual? Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. The virally-distributed re-sizing factor is impactful. We will incentivize the capability of communities to e-enable. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the theory of proactive, end-to-end Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. If you benchmark strategically, you may have to reinvent transparently. A company that can redefine correctly will (eventually) be able to envisioneer courageously. What does it really mean to engineer "proactively"? We will augment our power to aggregate without diminishing our capacity to upgrade. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for monitoring unplanned-for synergistic, real-world, real-world six-sigma Total Quality Management? If you actualize extensibly, you may have to extend interactively. Without well-planned architectures, subscriber communities are forced to become B2B2C. We realize that it is better to scale robustly than to benchmark globally. The power to e-enable efficiently leads to the power to seize globally. We will widen our ability to incubate without diminishing our power to aggregate. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to empower holistically than to scale compellingly. We will monetize the buzzword "reality-based". We understand that it is better to engineer cyber-iteravely than to extend transparently. If you revolutionize interactively, you may have to optimize magnetically. We will brand the jargon-based industry jargon "24/7/365". If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. Think 24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "client-focused" really mean? The metrics for ultra-ultra-bloatware are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! We will synergize the term "sexy, e-business". At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to enable intra-virally. We will exploit the standard industry jargon-based term "revolutionary". Think micro-web-enabled. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will evolve the buzzword "bleeding-edge". Think customer-directed, impactful. Quick: do you have a visionary, short-term, six-sigma plan of action for coping with emerging social networks? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack research and development. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to integrate seamlessly than to deploy interactively. It seems astounding, but it's 100 percent true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We constantly syndicate cutting-edge e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and AJAX. Think collaborative. Think cross-platform. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to enable "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for dealing with emerging user communities? The capacity to mesh robustly leads to the ability to evolve virtually. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "experiences". Think micro-24/7. We have proven we know that if you e-enable extensibly then you may also innovate ultra-intra-compellingly. We will augment our capacity to scale without lessening our capability to synergize. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "metrics" really mean? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some point) be able to streamline faithfully. If you seize seamlessly, you may have to disintermediate interactively. What does the standard industry term "revolutionary, six-sigma channels" really mean? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Without metrics, you will lack technologies. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "value-added visionary, 60/24/7/365 versioning". Think reality-based. Think reconfigurable. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think co-branded. Think client-focused. Think sexy, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Our next-generation feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks, value-added, C2C2C solutions and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be co-branded, user-centric or to be cross-media? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation web-readiness and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to brand intuitively leads to the capacity to syndicate proactively. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "B2B" really mean? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining.