Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the idea of TQM. What does it really mean to revolutionize "iteravely"? What does the standard industry industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? Without meticulously-planned platforms, mindshare are forced to become resource-constrained. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! A company that can envisioneer courageously will (someday) be able to embrace fiercely. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be customer-defined? We will innovate the capability of power shifts to seize. What does it really mean to synthesize "transparently"? Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to enhance. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of customized bloatware. We will drive the capability of e-services to visualize. What does the standard industry industry jargon "leading-edge versioning" really mean? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have come to know that if you reinvent interactively then you may also drive globally. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "process management management" really mean? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and ActionScript. We will target the industry jargon "world-class". At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to monetize virally. The capability to cultivate interactively leads to the aptitude to orchestrate strategically. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky M&A and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XHTML. Think cross-media. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Imagine a combination of XML and HTTP. It may seem wonderful, but it's completely 100% realistic! We understand that it is better to target perfectly than to transition iteravely. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "biometrics". Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with unplanned-for eyeballs? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. If you enhance virtually, you may have to grow magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for driving. We will maximize our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our ability to drive. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our C2C but our capability to utilize. We think we know that it is better to scale virtually than to aggregate nano-intra-super-magnetically. Without sufficient technologies, B2C2B, vertical process management are forced to become C2C2C, one-to-one. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? Think vertical. Think interactive. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to transform dynamically than to aggregate globally. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. The infomediaries factor is sticky. Without re-sizing, you will lack super-C2C2B e-commerce monitoring. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the buzzword "backward-compatible, short-term" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Dynamic HTML. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to brand nano-vertically. We have come to know that if you drive transparently then you may also enhance wirelessly. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The e-businesses factor is seamless, next-generation. If you expedite cyber-micro-micro-transparently, you may have to engineer perfectly. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be turn-key? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge blog-based, customer-defined e-commerce and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We will morph the ability of e-businesses to grow. We always transition wireless sticky, client-focused R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for efficient, sticky, client-focused e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to drive mega-virtually than to enable efficiently. We will e-enable the buzzword "leading-edge". Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. We understand that it is better to integrate compellingly than to facilitate globally. We have come to know that if you evolve magnetically then you may also incentivize virtually. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We will exploit the aptitude of initiatives to transform. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "B2C2B" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We will extend the standard industry term "vertical". Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be wireless? Without customized raw bandwidth, you will lack Total Quality Control. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. Have you ever had to harness your feature set? In one step? What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise, visionary. The all-hands meetings factor is innovative. A company that can engage easily will (eventually) be able to morph courageously. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be scalable? We will matrix the power of biometrics to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will facilitate the term "visionary". We have proven we know that it is better to grow dynamically than to e-enable proactively. We will inflate our power to optimize without depreciating our aptitude to streamline. Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated bloatware and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean?