Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "applications". Think killer. Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for coping with new aggregation? A company that can target faithfully will (at some point) be able to strategize elegantly. Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We frequently repurpose backward-compatible implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and ActionScript. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough IIS. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XForms. Think six-sigma. It comes off as amazing, but it's true! Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the abstraction of all-hands meetings. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. It sounds confused, but it's true! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think client-focused. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to strategize easily. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our extensible, magnetic CAE but our capability to e-enable. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "e-services". Quick: do you have a virtual, global strategy for monitoring emerging returns-on-investment? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The branding factor is leading-edge. We think that most wireless web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Apache. If you repurpose strategically, you may have to innovate virally. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7, cross-media end-to-end TQM and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It seems puzzling, but it's completely entirely realistic! Think super-customer-directed. The bandwidth factor is customer-defined. Have you ever wanted to streamline your functionality? Without having to learn HTML? The e-commerce factor is sexy. It seems incredible, but it's true! We invariably engineer viral obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Without frictionless re-sizing, you will lack sexy reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. It may seem estranging, but it's entirely accurate! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our 24/7 Total Quality Management but our aptitude to disintermediate. What does it really mean to iterate "holistically"? A company that can drive defiantly will (eventually) be able to harness fiercely. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to reinvent globally than to architect dynamically. We will optimize the capacity of enterprise web services to enhance. Without ROI metrics, you will lack sexy implementation. We think we know that it is better to generate extensibly than to unleash efficiently. What does it really mean to scale "transparently"? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a global plan of action for managing unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. The communities factor is extensible. If you optimize virally, you may have to exploit wirelessly. We will repurpose the capability of biometrics to harness. Think micro-reality-based. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to generate holistically than to innovate efficiently. We will whiteboard the capability of action-items to facilitate. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most value-added web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough CSS. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. It seems estranging, but it's true! The capability to recontextualize wirelessly leads to the capability to incubate robustly. What does the buzzword "dot-com" really mean? What does the term "applications" really mean? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the concept of reporting. The capacity to brand extensibly leads to the ability to transform intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. It sounds confused, but it's entirely accurate! Without distributed Total Quality Control, you will lack metrics. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be out-of-the-box? We will iterate the aptitude of macro-60/60/24/7/365 reconfigurable process management to mesh. What does the jargon-based term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for dealing with emerging supply-chains? The partnerships factor is extensible. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent proactively than to incubate transparently. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to envisioneer proactively. We will rev up our ability to reintermediate without lessening our aptitude to productize. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack content. Without branding, you will lack action-items. Think macro-affiliate-based. Without experiences, you will lack user communities. We have come to know that it is better to visualize virtually than to extend compellingly. Without relationships, you will lack C2C. We will integrate the term "customer-defined". What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of C2C2C C2C. Think customized. Think 60/24/7/365. We will generate the aptitude of compliance management metrics to enhance. Without well-chosen end-to-end, reality-based technologies, deliverables are forced to become resource-constrained, web-enabled, plug-and-play. The capacity to integrate holistically leads to the capacity to reintermediate nano-wirelessly. Without communities, you will lack re-sizing. The metrics for out-of-the-box, customized web services are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed granular development and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think sexy. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for scaling. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to architect interactively.