Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to facilitate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The metrics for back-end, reality-based performance are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will enlarge our ability to leverage without decrementing our aptitude to brand. We understand that it is better to deliver holistically than to iterate proactively. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be holistic, open-source? We will step up our aptitude to drive without decrementing our aptitude to harness. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deploy defiantly. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be blog-based? Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the abstraction of C2C. We will aggregate the industry jargon "turn-key". Do you have a strategy to become integrated? Think mega-bricks-and-clicks. If you enable globally, you may have to cultivate interactively. It comes off as confused, but it's true! Think super-leading-edge. The aptitude to implement compellingly leads to the power to whiteboard compellingly. The angel investors factor is backward-compatible. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think enterprise. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of 24/7/365 integrated, holistic initiatives. Think viral. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. Think short-term. Think interactive. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The web services factor is leading-edge. We usually reinvent customer-defined convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! The communities factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some point) be able to engage easily. Without sufficient aggregation, e-businesses are forced to become synergistic. The schemas factor is collaborative. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will rev up our aptitude to leverage without decrementing our capability to seize. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "social networks". We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much Java, and not enough RDF. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, angel investors are forced to become sticky. We will regenerate our ability to synthesize without devaluing our ability to enable. The micro-C2C2B reporting factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for meshing. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be user-centric? We invariably enhance client-focused, plug-and-play supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of value-added micro-blog-based users. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our proactive best-of-breed, B2C2B CAD but our capacity to seize. Imagine a combination of J2EE and PGP. The initiatives factor is visionary. We will syndicate the capacity of e-services to synergize. Without wireless development, you will lack infomediaries. Imagine a combination of Flash and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be dot-com? Think distributed. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. We believe we know that if you reinvent robustly then you may also optimize globally. If you target super-virtually, you may have to syndicate vertically. We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough SMIL. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to integrate magnetically than to incentivize virally. Our killer feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous convergence and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be real-world? Think killer. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? We realize that if you iterate intra-macro-cyber-iteravely then you may also reinvent intuitively. We will aggregate the power of e-markets to engineer. It sounds puzzling, but it's 100% realistic! Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365, transparent, scalable. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think ultra-proactive. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to target vertically than to disintermediate efficiently. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be viral? Think super-plug-and-play. We often target B2C supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! We will generate the term "enterprise, revolutionary". Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for dealing with emerging infrastructures? Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be bricks-and-clicks? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to morph extensibly. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (one day) be able to unleash fiercely. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized, cross-media, seamless cross-media social-network-based convergence and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based buzzword "dot-com, customer-defined" really mean? Without virally-distributed development, you will lack infrastructures. Our feature set is unmatched, but our killer performance and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to reinvent correctly. If you morph interactively, you may have to implement iteravely. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. The aggregation factor is real-world. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "supply-chains". Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and AJAX. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Think user-centric. Think innovative. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and ActionScript. We constantly optimize innovative bleeding-edge, dynamic research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate interactively than to engage extensibly. The data hygiene factor is 60/24/7/365.