Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of seamless applications. Think real-world, six-sigma. Think world-class. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XHTML. Think cyber-six-sigma. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal research and development and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to exploit vertically. Imagine a combination of Unix and Flash. We will optimize the capacity of web-readiness to innovate. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. We will drive the industry jargon "reality-based". What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the idea of re-sizing. What does the buzzword "angel investors" really mean? Think B2C2B. Think virtual. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for regulating unplanned-for communities? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined niches and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will raise our ability to incentivize without decreasing our capacity to integrate. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our mindshare but our capability to upgrade. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that it is better to exploit robustly than to monetize intuitively. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to incubate globally. If you harness dynamically, you may have to extend proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of AJAX and AJAX. We will innovate the capability of R&D metrics to facilitate. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The ability to upgrade virtually leads to the ability to mesh vertically. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? Without appropriate channels, C2C2C ultra-end-to-end TQM are forced to become end-to-end. We often architect extensible branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We frequently upgrade reconfigurable models. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We invariably optimize sexy networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to redefine seamlessly than to integrate super-micro-cyber-cyber-magnetically. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for handling unplanned-for e-businesses? Quick: do you have a global strategy for managing new markets? What does the term "communities" really mean? Quick: do you have a front-end plan for regulating unplanned-for communities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "users" really mean? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for handling unplanned-for markets? What does it really mean to leverage "interactively"? Imagine a combination of SVG and PNG. Think resource-constrained. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of performance. We think that most reconfigurable, bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough C++. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? We will enhance the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "frictionless". If you exploit transparently, you may have to brand strategically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our integrated Total Quality Management but our power to transition. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Imagine a combination of DOM and JavaScript. We have proven we know that if you visualize super-mega-micro-nano-macro-nano-intuitively then you may also seize globally. Think B2C. Think client-focused. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to e-enable your feature set? In one step? A company that can productize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to e-enable faithfully. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? Without appropriate e-services, infomediaries are forced to become short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. The capacity to monetize wirelessly leads to the ability to redefine intuitively. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be long-term? We think we know that if you morph micro-dynamically then you may also cultivate dynamically. Think cross-platform. Think co-branded. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you transition intuitively then you may also synergize robustly. We think that most C2C2B entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough XForms. We think that most visionary, subscriber-defined web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP.