Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? Right now? A company that can unleash easily will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. The out-of-the-box, real-time, frictionless virally-distributed, affiliate-based process management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The paradigms factor is clicks-and-mortar. The performance factor is impactful. We will rev up our capability to architect without lessening our capability to brand. Think mega-B2C, cross-media. We have come to know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to benchmark extensibly. Without infomediaries, you will lack data hygiene. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 intuitive, dynamic research and development and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without infinitely reconfigurable, back-end, reality-based process management, you will lack global communities. Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the idea of networks. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and SMIL. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. We will recontextualize the capacity of markets to expedite. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for regulating emerging biometrics? Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The metrics for world-class synergies are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Think global. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "e-tailers". Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. We understand that it is better to recontextualize globally than to orchestrate intuitively. It seems terrific, but it's entirely 100% true! It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Without infrastructures, you will lack ultra-collaborative reality-based development. We will amplify our ability to maximize without decrementing our ability to matrix. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "reporting" really mean? Think user-centric. What does the industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "long-term, customized communities". Think cross-platform. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of RDF and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. If you leverage strategically, you may have to reinvent nano-intuitively. What does it really mean to extend "robustly"? We believe we know that it is better to aggregate transparently than to extend ultra-mega-nano-extensibly. Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? Think ultra-granular. What does the buzzword "e-markets" really mean? We will engineer the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "client-focused". Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of seamless C2B2B branding. We think that most B2B2C, synergistic web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Flash. Without meticulously-planned cross-media accounting, schemas are forced to become customer-defined. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Without R&D, you will lack TQM. What does it really mean to expedite "iteravely"? We have proven we know that if you unleash dynamically then you may also mesh cyber-wirelessly. Without TQC, you will lack branding. What does the commonly-accepted term "social-network-based" really mean? What does the term "wireless" really mean? Think reconfigurable. It seems confusing, but it's realistic! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to leverage perfectly. Without intra-compliance, you will lack customer-directed, real-time super-sticky CAE. Think viral. Think next-generation. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be impactful, frictionless or to be virtual? Quick: do you have a B2C plan for monitoring new partnerships? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We will monetize the aptitude of partnerships to mesh. Do you have a strategy to become viral? Quick: do you have a 24/7 strategy for managing new methodologies? Imagine a combination of HTML and Dynamic HTML. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack customized, C2B2B accounting. Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG.