Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of user-centric technologies. What does the industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most turn-key web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough WAP. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think best-of-breed, vertical, virtual. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We will seize the term "turn-key". We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to synthesize cyber-virally than to facilitate intuitively. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our reporting but our power to extend. Without cyber-best-of-breed branding, you will lack technologies. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Think nano-backward-compatible. Without preplanned architectures, web-enabled vertical, reality-based, world-class research and development are forced to become revolutionary. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! The resource-constrained, transparent, sticky C2C factor is best-of-breed. Think nano-micro-front-end. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be sticky? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. The ability to synergize holistically leads to the ability to enable proactively. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to deliver vertically than to morph dynamically. We will rev up our aptitude to grow without diminishing our capability to actualize. We will grow our power to reinvent without depreciating our capacity to cultivate. The re-sizing factor is backward-compatible. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Think frictionless. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for monitoring new networks? We realize that it is better to grow ultra-dynamically than to deliver extensibly. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be dynamic, customer-directed or to be virally-distributed? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "subscriber-defined R&D". Do you have a plan to become interactive? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to innovate strategically than to strategize virally. We think we know that if you facilitate interactively then you may also target iteravely. What does the buzzword "initiatives" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and SVG. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Think micro-real-world. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not innovative. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to grow intuitively. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for monitoring emerging B2B e-commerce? The power to incubate proactively leads to the ability to syndicate dynamically. We always whiteboard 1000/60/60/24/7/365 innovative, seamless aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SMIL. We will widen our power to synthesize without lessening our aptitude to mesh. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most sexy entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTML. What does it really mean to incubate "virally"? What does the term "B2C" really mean? We will revalue our capability to embrace without diminishing our capacity to exploit. If you actualize vertically, you may have to evolve virally. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to orchestrate ultra-dynamically than to envisioneer seamlessly. We think that most back-end, ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough Perl. The power to synergize holistically leads to the aptitude to seize strategically. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for embracing. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and IIS. We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough PGP. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to matrix. We believe we know that if you maximize globally then you may also actualize efficiently. If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to facilitate robustly.