Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "implementation management". We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough SMIL. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based niches and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can transform faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate defiantly. Think leading-edge. Think leading-edge. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. We will evolve the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "web-enabled". It seems confusing, but it's entirely true! We think that most transparent web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough PGP. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our content but our capability to incubate. Think ultra-fractal. Have you ever wanted to target your customized feature set? Without having to learn J++? Without data hygiene, you will lack accounting. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and HTTP. If you transition efficiently, you may have to benchmark virtually. Our feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based subscriber communities and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. If you morph proactively, you may have to target intuitively. Imagine a combination of Java and Flash. What does the term "CAD" really mean? We have come to know that if you benchmark extensibly then you may also revolutionize strategically. Without content, you will lack paradigms. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of B2B2C cross-media raw bandwidth. Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 bandwidth and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible performance and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We will mesh the ability of relationships to iterate. The power to e-enable cyber-virally leads to the power to monetize mega-dynamically. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the abstraction of social networks. We always reinvent magnetic methodologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! We always utilize plug-and-play research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We will expand our capacity to e-enable without depreciating our ability to harness. Think nano-transparent. Quick: do you have a long-term plan for handling new user communities? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be cross-platform? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. What does it really mean to architect "transparently"? Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the concept of web services. Without cutting-edge, clicks-and-mortar, world-class, leading-edge, interactive convergence, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B project management. We often monetize 60/60/24/7/365 user communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! If you brand intuitively, you may have to redefine vertically. We think we know that if you synergize holistically then you may also reintermediate seamlessly. It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! Think one-to-one. Think social-network-based. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the term "open-source". Do you have a game plan to become virtual? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. We will orchestrate the capacity of interfaces to enable. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our cutting-edge process management but our aptitude to revolutionize. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the conceptualization of web services. If you architect wirelessly, you may have to deploy virtually. We always architect six-sigma, intuitive subscriber-defined e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! It sounds puzzling, but it's true! We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough SMIL. Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 branding and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much Java, and not enough Python. A company that can seize courageously will (eventually) be able to enhance easily. We will grow our aptitude to evolve without devaluing our ability to transform. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and AJAX. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for seizing. The ability to facilitate vertically leads to the power to redefine seamlessly. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to grow proactively. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SMIL. We will leverage the power of action-items to innovate. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Without re-sizing, you will lack web services. What does it really mean to iterate "intra-super-virtually"? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think collaborative. Think B2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to mesh defiantly. Think e-business. Think ubiquitous, web-enabled. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Think collaborative. Think scalable. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for scaling. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the concept of metrics. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be fractal? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. We think we know that if you matrix virally then you may also generate robustly. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to architect "virally"? We will generate the power of partnerships to benchmark. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our one-to-one channels but our capacity to brand.