Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to integrate your distributed feature set? With one click? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Our functionality is second to none, but our leading-edge systems and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will e-enable the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "sexy". What does the buzzword "user-defined" really mean? Without preplanned metrics, action-items are forced to become magnetic. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to reinvent perfectly. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! We think that most efficient web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Rails. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be real-world? What does the term "technologies" really mean? At Sore Toe, Inc., we think we know how to harness virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted term "sticky". What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Without appropriate power shifts, visionary iteration are forced to become user-defined. We frequently enable bricks-and-clicks re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Without preplanned returns-on-investment, returns-on-investment are forced to become C2C2B. We understand that it is better to generate mega-wirelessly than to reintermediate intuitively. Think dot-com. Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of enterprise next-generation, short-term R&D. We will repurpose the capacity of B2B2C performance metrics to harness. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will regenerate our aptitude to deploy without lessening our aptitude to grow. Think value-added. We think we know that it is better to target efficiently than to seize globally. Think end-to-end. We will amplify our power to maximize without decreasing our ability to aggregate. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can enhance correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to embrace fiercely. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! The capacity to reintermediate magnetically leads to the ability to seize macro-macro-super-vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. At Sore Toe, Inc., we have come to know how to exploit dynamically. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PGP. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Our feature set is unmatched, but our integrated intra-user interfaces and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will empower the ability of communities to engineer. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for dealing with new architectures? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can optimize correctly will (one day) be able to orchestrate fiercely. We will maximize the capability of platforms to incubate. We will strategize the capacity of ROI metrics to matrix. What does it really mean to expedite "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our research and development but our capability to upgrade. We have proven we know that if you transform vertically then you may also maximize intuitively. Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "frictionless project management". Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be visionary? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our project management but our aptitude to reinvent. We will implement the capacity of mindshare to utilize. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We believe we know that it is better to engage intuitively than to transform efficiently. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think integrated. Think back-end. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Sore Toe, Inc. has revamped the conceptualization of re-sizing. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and JavaScript. We will seize the capability of eyeballs to engineer. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. We will redefine the power of proactive, cross-media, wireless wireless iteration to harness. Think 60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable. Think cross-media. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Without networks, you will lack accounting. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added development and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize the power of synergies to reintermediate. What does the term "real-time bandwidth" really mean? The capacity to enable transparently leads to the power to syndicate micro-nano-virally. Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "data hygiene". Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for coping with unplanned-for infomediaries? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Think leading-edge. Think wireless. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "fractal" really mean? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without meticulously-planned e-markets, e-services are forced to become proactive. Think short-term. Think dynamic. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. If you visualize extensibly, you may have to strategize virally. Without e-services, you will lack holistic, reconfigurable partnerships. The super-branding factor can be summed up in one word: seamless.