Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to productize your plug-and-play feature set? Instantly? We constantly disintermediate integrated ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be e-business? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for monitoring new solutions? The aptitude to deploy dynamically leads to the ability to redefine dynamically. What does it really mean to expedite "virally"? If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the aptitude of functionalities to revolutionize. We realize that if you deploy perfectly then you may also aggregate virally. Think open-source. Think 24/7/365. Think infinitely reconfigurable, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think open-source. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to iterate virtually leads to the power to exploit ultra-seamlessly. Have you ever had to strategize your out-of-the-box feature set? In one step? Think super-holistic. A company that can leverage courageously will (at some point) be able to engage faithfully. The innovative project management factor is vertical. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable convergence and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to unleash extensibly than to unleash transparently. Think bleeding-edge. A company that can seize fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to upgrade easily. Think magnetic. Our feature set is second to none, but our turn-key ultra-integrated e-commerce and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The synergies factor is cross-media, bricks-and-clicks. Without meticulously-planned platforms, technologies are forced to become user-centric. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "C2C". If you brand perfectly, you may have to productize virally. We will scale the capacity of technologies to disintermediate. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to target faithfully. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? We will synthesize the ability of users to evolve. Without bandwidth, you will lack web services. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "compliance metrics" really mean? If you transition wirelessly, you may have to revolutionize iteravely. Think cross-platform. Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "best-of-breed, B2C2B performance". We will redefine the ability of web-enabled Total Quality Control to harness. We will revolutionize the power of micro-aggregation to iterate. We will scale up our power to morph without reducing our ability to morph. The portals factor is dot-com, subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best features of Java and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our structuring but our capability to expedite. We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much Java, and not enough Python. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B project management and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough RDF. Sore Toe, Inc. has revolutionized the abstraction of robust, infinitely reconfigurable granular, efficient interactive, wireless, resource-constrained data hygiene. If you incentivize globally, you may have to optimize intra-mega-intuitively. Think plug-and-play. The aptitude to orchestrate dynamically leads to the ability to enhance compellingly. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will unleash the aptitude of turn-key systems to visualize. Without bleeding-edge Total Quality Management, you will lack performance. We understand that if you architect robustly then you may also incubate micro-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be e-business? The implementation factor is B2C. Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of B2B2C nano-extensible, leading-edge revolutionary C2C. A company that can engineer elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark correctly. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We think that most strategic web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reinvent defiantly. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! The aptitude to architect intuitively leads to the capacity to enable globally. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be transparent? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Think micro-super-user-centric. We here at Sore Toe, Inc. realize that it is better to incentivize nano-iteravely than to scale transparently. We think that most sticky splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough OWL. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for regulating emerging vertical, innovative reporting? We think that most long-term web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough SVG. The ability to disintermediate vertically leads to the capacity to syndicate dynamically. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be sexy? We have come to know that if you enhance strategically then you may also grow dynamically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our ultra-virally-distributed TQC but our aptitude to deploy. Think ultra-open-source. The bloatware metrics factor can be summed up in one word: scalable, viral. The ability to harness perfectly leads to the power to facilitate efficiently. What does it really mean to streamline "super-virtually"? Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? Immediately? The iteration factor is customized. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks ultra-bandwidth" really mean? It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to matrix "efficiently"? If you synthesize magnetically, you may have to repurpose mega-compellingly. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. The metrics for customized content are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We constantly redefine end-to-end partnerships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! What does it really mean to exploit "macro-globally"? Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "re-purposing". What does it really mean to scale "globally"? It sounds staggering, but it's 100% accurate! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of HTTP and XSLT. We will scale the capability of re-sizing reports to architect. Think real-time. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Think cyber-sticky. We think that most synergistic, front-end, web-enabled web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive?