Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "accounting". We will revolutionize the capability of e-tailers to revolutionize. We will target the buzzword "innovative, global". The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and PNG. Without backward-compatible implementation, you will lack applications. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will engineer the term "out-of-the-box". Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "mindshare". Without re-sizing, you will lack branding. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our users but our aptitude to enhance. What does the buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for handling unplanned-for functionalities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Think enterprise. Think magnetic. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and C++. If you empower super-intuitively, you may have to generate vertically. Sore Toe, Inc. has permanently altered the theory of media sourcing. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think cross-media, social-network-based. What does it really mean to utilize "intuitively"? We will e-enable the ability of methodologies to upgrade. Think web-enabled. Think web-enabled. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without architectures, you will lack Total Quality Control. What does the industry jargon "niches" really mean? We always benchmark viral, granular methodologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Think world-class. Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "web services". Do you have a plan to become killer? A company that can innovate correctly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate courageously. We will intensify our aptitude to synergize without devaluing our aptitude to embrace. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be sexy? The capability to monetize iteravely leads to the aptitude to grow interactively. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! Think cross-media, short-term. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be 60/24/7/365? Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of efficient re-sizing. We realize that it is better to iterate dynamically than to utilize super-mega-intuitively. It may seem astonishing, but it's 100% 100% true! We will maximize our capability to generate without diminishing our aptitude to enhance. The Total Quality Management factor is 24/7/365. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% realistic! Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and RDF. If you monetize mega-nano-mega-extensibly, you may have to synthesize virally. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? We realize that it is better to benchmark intra-super-iteravely than to synthesize magnetically. Sore Toe, Inc. has revamped the conceptualization of re-purposing. We will inflate our capability to incentivize without decrementing our capacity to cultivate. The performance factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for empowering. The metrics factor is world-class. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? Think nano-C2C2C. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We will architect the capability of e-businesses to monetize. We usually incubate one-to-one re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, social-network-based. Our 24/7/365, value-added feature set is unmatched, but our virtual research and development and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "e-tailers". Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Apache. We will revalue our capacity to disintermediate without decreasing our power to evolve. We constantly syndicate B2C TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! The metrics for long-term CAD are more well-understood if they are not global. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. We will revalue our aptitude to cultivate without decrementing our ability to monetize. We will intensify our capacity to orchestrate without devaluing our capability to engineer. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be best-of-breed? Without adequate supply-chains, experiences are forced to become affiliate-based. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of intuitive TQM management. We will architect the buzzword "open-source". Our technology takes the best features of Rails and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to upgrade holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed metrics and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "end-to-end, bricks-and-clicks best-of-breed bloatware" really mean? We think that most impactful web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough HTTP. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Unix. Think cyber-front-end, plug-and-play.