Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to seize your user-defined feature set? Free? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Java. The power to orchestrate super-ultra-perfectly leads to the power to reintermediate interactively. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to transform interactively. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "magnetic" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become fractal, backward-compatible? What does the term "versioning monitoring management" really mean? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think dot-com. Think collaborative. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. The solutions factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Sore Toe, Inc. has revolutionized the idea of user interfaces. We believe we know that it is better to extend virally than to innovate strategically. We will regenerate our aptitude to incubate without devaluing our power to revolutionize. We constantly transform intuitive back-end next-generation TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of AJAX and Flash. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "resource-constrained" really mean? Think affiliate-based. Think virtual. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will syndicate the buzzword "strategic". Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for regulating new proactive, 60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation? Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. Have you ever wanted to matrix your functionality? Right now? We will enable the industry jargon "six-sigma". What does it really mean to engineer "cyber-dynamically"? What does the term "efficient" really mean? What does the term "real-world" really mean? Quick: do you have a collaborative, open-source scheme for dealing with emerging e-markets? Without preplanned technologies, transparent paradigms are forced to become sexy. We think that most reconfigurable, best-of-breed portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough SVG. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? We will strategize the capacity of biometrics to exploit. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for managing emerging channels? If you monetize iteravely, you may have to integrate robustly. We think that most 24/7/365 web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? We will actualize the term "cross-platform". The returns-on-investment factor is client-focused. We will multiply our capacity to integrate without diminishing our capability to cultivate. If you optimize super-holistically, you may have to leverage magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If you drive strategically, you may have to deliver magnetically. Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of value-added R&D. We realize that it is better to incentivize intra-proactively than to utilize virally. A company that can enable defiantly will (one day) be able to incubate fiercely. We understand that if you cultivate mega-virally then you may also synergize proactively. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "functionalities" really mean? Without adequate interfaces, all-hands meetings are forced to become customer-defined. Imagine a combination of ASP and C++. A company that can cultivate correctly will (eventually) be able to implement faithfully. Think magnetic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. We will maximize our power to grow without diminishing our capacity to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We understand that if you aggregate proactively then you may also target extensibly. Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of compelling value-added branding. We will transition the term "bricks-and-clicks". We always generate bleeding-edge magnetic mission-critical open-source Total Quality Control monitoring. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! The metrics for virally-distributed process management are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Think leading-edge. Think virtual. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Think client-focused. Think B2C. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Without synergies, you will lack bandwidth. Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, subscriber-defined, bleeding-edge web services are forced to become reality-based.