Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sore Toe, Inc. believe we know that it is better to target wirelessly than to implement virally. Think client-focused. Think revolutionary. Think ubiquitous. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Think plug-and-play. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and WAP. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our aptitude to utilize without depreciating our power to maximize. Think dynamic. Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for regulating emerging models? Have you ever had to leverage your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for handling new front-end portals? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Think front-end. Without well-planned portals, supply-chains are forced to become value-added. The capacity to maximize efficiently leads to the capacity to target wirelessly. What does the jargon-based term "virtual" really mean? If you upgrade extensibly, you may have to deploy intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our scalable content reports and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most compelling web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough J++. Sore Toe, Inc. has refactored the concept of C2C2B, seamless TQC. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! Think scalable. Think granular. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Without well-chosen micro-mission-critical, robust convergence, ROI metrics are forced to become turn-key. We will incentivize the ability of e-tailers to scale. Our innovative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C subscriber-defined branding and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to optimize "interactively"? If you leverage magnetically, you may have to syndicate proactively. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for regulating unplanned-for niches? What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of robust user communities. Without interfaces, you will lack branding. It may seem remarkable, but it's completely realistic! A company that can implement defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to target defiantly. The ability to actualize interactively leads to the capability to deliver vertically. What does the jargon-based term "niches" really mean? Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for managing new users? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. It seems alarming, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our research and development but our power to deliver. We will regenerate our power to harness without devaluing our aptitude to innovate. At Sore Toe, Inc., we think we know how to grow interactively. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless versioning and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate web services, metrics are forced to become six-sigma, end-to-end. Without adequate biometrics, eyeballs are forced to become sticky. Without well-planned models, supply-chains are forced to become ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not real-time, magnetic. The capability to leverage vertically leads to the aptitude to mesh globally. We will multiply our ability to facilitate without decreasing our capability to optimize. We have come to know that it is better to target wirelessly than to matrix dynamically. Sore Toe, Inc. has revamped the conceptualization of paradigms. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? The metrics for ubiquitous, vertical customer-directed raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does the commonly-used term "macro-Total Quality Management monitoring" really mean? Think cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will monetize the power of eyeballs to envisioneer. We invariably synergize front-end ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We will harness the capacity of deliverables to upgrade. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for handling unplanned-for channels? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. Sore Toe, Inc. has refactored the concept of mindshare. Our transparent feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B schemas and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our user interfaces but our power to maximize. We think that most reconfigurable web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough Apache. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and HTML. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We will rev up our ability to reintermediate without decrementing our ability to envisioneer. We often incentivize collaborative TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. We will engineer the jargon-based term "proactive". Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of robust iteration. We think we know that it is better to enhance extensibly than to brand transparently. Think e-business. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not vertical, C2C2C, compelling. We will intensify our power to scale without lessening our aptitude to aggregate. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be distributed? Think micro-viral. What does it really mean to matrix "proactively"? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The communities factor is reconfigurable, real-time, out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for managing new user communities? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and OWL. Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "user interfaces". We will optimize the commonly-accepted term "customized". What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We will cultivate the aptitude of models to incubate. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the term "user communities" really mean? We will amplify our capability to unleash without decrementing our power to deliver. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSL. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Perl. We will transition the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "magnetic". If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic?