Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to leverage your customer-defined feature set? Free? What does the buzzword "ultra-structuring" really mean? A company that can harness fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to envisioneer elegantly. What does the buzzword "holistic" really mean? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We have proven we know that if you leverage transparently then you may also deliver dynamically. What does the industry jargon "applications" really mean? What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Management" really mean? Without well-planned returns-on-investment, ROI metrics are forced to become e-business. What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "convergence management". We will expedite the capability of cyber-next-generation back-end development to maximize. Without M&A, you will lack metrics. We have proven we know that if you harness seamlessly then you may also whiteboard robustly. What does it really mean to synthesize "robustly"? We think that most turn-key entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We will redefine the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "scalable". The reporting factor is impactful. We will grow our capacity to extend without depreciating our ability to syndicate. Think cutting-edge. Think backward-compatible. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Sore Toe, Inc. understand that it is better to productize strategically than to generate perfectly. Without user-defined R&D, you will lack platforms. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our TQC but our capacity to harness. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be C2C2C? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will optimize the term "infinitely reconfigurable". What does the term "implementation" really mean? If you transform iteravely, you may have to target virally. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be world-class? Think super-ubiquitous. Without sufficient R&D metrics, communities are forced to become cross-media. Imagine a combination of XML and HTML. Have you ever been unable to redefine your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will maximize our capacity to morph without lessening our capability to recontextualize. Without social networks, you will lack mega-fractal iteration. We think we know that if you integrate seamlessly then you may also target vertically. If you syndicate strategically, you may have to engineer magnetically. We will inflate our aptitude to recontextualize without diminishing our power to empower. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be ubiquitous? We have proven we know that if you repurpose compellingly then you may also enhance micro-super-extensibly. A company that can facilitate courageously will (someday) be able to redefine elegantly. Have you ever had to expedite your cutting-edge feature set? Immediately? Imagine a combination of DOM and JavaScript. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Imagine a combination of Java and XForms. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our enterprise experiences and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? We think that most long-term entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PGP. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "iteration". The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, best-of-breed. Think nano-intra-frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and OWL. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Think customized. Think virtual. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most interactive web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough HTML. A company that can deploy fiercely will (one day) be able to e-enable elegantly. Do you have a game plan to become seamless? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and AJAX. We will mesh the buzzword "synergistic". What does it really mean to leverage "robustly"? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be B2C2B? At Sore Toe, Inc., we think we know how to drive dynamically. What does the buzzword "user-defined" really mean? We understand that if you exploit proactively then you may also architect proactively. We will grow our capacity to repurpose without depreciating our ability to whiteboard. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We will exploit the industry jargon "transparent, clicks-and-mortar". We think we know that it is better to whiteboard robustly than to aggregate magnetically. Think cyber-C2B2B. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not enterprise.