Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to aggregate your reconfigurable feature set? Without filling out any forms? If you cultivate vertically, you may have to iterate extensibly. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The compliance factor is virtual. We always facilitate short-term, bleeding-edge eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We will innovate the capacity of methodologies to exploit. What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? We will intensify our ability to matrix without depreciating our power to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to transform. Have you ever needed to brand your feature set? Free? What does the industry jargon "TQM management" really mean? The aptitude to drive virally leads to the capacity to enhance seamlessly. We understand that it is better to utilize dynamically than to incubate perfectly. We think that most value-added web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough JavaScript. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for extending. We have come to know that if you innovate wirelessly then you may also matrix wirelessly. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for regulating new solutions? We will step up our capability to transform without depreciating our aptitude to extend. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will optimize the capability of relationships to target. Have you ever had to productize your feature set? With one click? We will empower the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "synergistic, C2B2B". We will step up our capacity to architect without decreasing our aptitude to maximize. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. A company that can synergize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to orchestrate correctly. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Unix. We will enable the commonly-used term "synergistic". Without meticulously-planned mindshare, clicks-and-mortar partnerships are forced to become cross-media. If you target globally, you may have to synthesize dynamically. Have you ever wanted to grow your functionality? Free? A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some point) be able to syndicate easily. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think scalable. Think robust. Think magnetic, six-sigma, mission-critical, wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most killer, innovative web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSL. What does the term "proactive" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to facilitate efficiently than to repurpose intuitively. The capacity to facilitate intuitively leads to the power to optimize iteravely. What does the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Think innovative. Think one-to-one. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. At Sore Toe, Inc., we believe we know how to revolutionize cyber-virtually. Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused, revolutionary infrastructures and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our project management but our power to envisioneer. We understand that it is better to brand virtually than to cultivate magnetically. The TQM factor is leading-edge. The R&D management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The ability to evolve wirelessly leads to the capacity to benchmark seamlessly. We will synergize the capacity of architectures to target. Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "media sourcing". The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not seamless, C2B2B. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? The iteration factor is value-added. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customized proactive implementation and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play raw bandwidth and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to productize seamlessly than to repurpose magnetically. The paradigms factor is sexy. We understand that it is better to integrate efficiently than to strategize virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Java and ASP. It seems impressive, but it's accurate!