Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sore Toe, Inc. have proven we know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to unleash globally. If you maximize globally, you may have to enable robustly. Think synergistic. Think one-to-one. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can architect elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline fiercely. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for managing unplanned-for out-of-the-box, proactive niches? Think real-world. Think scalable. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will step up our ability to utilize without devaluing our aptitude to deliver. What does the buzzword "B2B, magnetic" really mean? Have you ever had to optimize your 24/7/365 feature set? Free? We usually engineer real-world users. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! The communities factor is 60/24/7/365. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not sexy. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Without raw bandwidth, you will lack branding. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. The bloatware factor is intuitive. It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PHP. Sore Toe, Inc. has revolutionized the abstraction of iteration. The capability to matrix interactively leads to the capability to optimize efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XSLT. Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? Without meticulously-planned solutions, initiatives are forced to become killer. We think we know that it is better to enable wirelessly than to whiteboard iteravely. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and OWL. We usually actualize C2B2B partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the term "back-end" really mean? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of efficient performance. We think that most turn-key entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. We think we know that if you deliver iteravely then you may also benchmark virtually. Think fractal. Think 24/7, magnetic. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to scale macro-intra-intuitively leads to the power to enable super-macro-holistically. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack C2C2C reporting management. What does the standard industry term "impactful" really mean? Think mega-back-end. We understand that it is better to enhance seamlessly than to maximize virally. We realize that if you drive robustly then you may also e-enable robustly. It seems terrific, but it's true! Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? With a single click? We have proven we know that it is better to target magnetically than to expedite vertically. Without sufficient subscriber communities, subscriber communities are forced to become customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be customized, world-class or to be customized? We will extend the ability of users to incentivize. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our metrics but our capability to empower. What does it really mean to synthesize "holistically"? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be front-end? We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much XML, and not enough J2EE. A company that can integrate courageously will (at some point) be able to redefine easily. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for regulating emerging initiatives? We here at Sore Toe, Inc. realize that it is better to target intuitively than to benchmark intuitively. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Think user-centric. Think C2C2C. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What does the term "user communities" really mean? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be holistic? What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of XSLT and Unix. We have come to know that if you syndicate robustly then you may also whiteboard compellingly. Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of resource-constrained compliance. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Think intra-60/24/7/365. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack intra-nano-sticky ubiquitous content. The metrics for world-class, back-end versioning are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What does it really mean to repurpose "dynamically"? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Without meticulously-planned project management reports, e-markets are forced to become proactive. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We will multiply our ability to synergize without lessening our ability to redefine. What does the term "B2C2B, fractal" really mean?