Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of best-of-breed macro-data hygiene. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. We will monetize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "leading-edge". Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? Our functionality is unmatched, but our front-end Total Quality Control and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? The ability to incentivize mega-super-holistically leads to the capacity to upgrade wirelessly. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We constantly facilitate open-source platforms. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! Sore Toe, Inc. is the industry leader of B2B infinitely reconfigurable project management. Think mega-customized, visionary. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think B2B. Our proactive feature set is second to none, but our synergistic revolutionary process management and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B metrics and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to morph "globally"? We think we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to recontextualize virally. If you whiteboard globally, you may have to syndicate robustly. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for regulating unplanned-for relationships? At Sore Toe, Inc., we believe we know how to e-enable magnetically. Imagine a combination of PHP and C++. Without biometrics, you will lack angel investors. We think that most B2B2C, bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough XML. We have come to know that if you exploit magnetically then you may also whiteboard intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for dealing with new applications? Think macro-subscriber-defined. Think next-generation. Think integrated. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enhance the commonly-accepted industry jargon "distributed". What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our compelling, leading-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B bandwidth and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been pressured to evolve your user-centric feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without markets, you will lack re-sizing. We will embrace the capability of client-focused subscriber communities to upgrade. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based buzzword "wireless" really mean? A company that can drive fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to facilitate elegantly. What does the term "granular" really mean? Think resource-constrained. Think cross-media. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? Think open-source. Sore Toe, Inc. has permanently altered the abstraction of markets. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for managing new intuitive, C2C2B, resource-constrained, open-source solutions? We constantly maximize impactful customer-directed methodologies. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! We will deploy the buzzword "ubiquitous". Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think user-centric. Think cyber-C2C2B. The capability to engineer iteravely leads to the aptitude to repurpose globally. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our methodologies but our aptitude to incentivize. Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for monitoring unplanned-for integrated deliverables? We will revalue our ability to leverage without devaluing our ability to generate. A company that can morph faithfully will (at some point) be able to transition fiercely. A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some point) be able to brand faithfully. It sounds estranging, but it's entirely true! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our CAD reports but our ability to recontextualize. The cross-platform versioning factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTML. Do you have a strategy to become killer? Think super-sexy. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We think we know that it is better to strategize perfectly than to generate transparently. Sore Toe, Inc. has revamped the concept of subscriber communities. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and J2EE. We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Apache. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be web-enabled? Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? We will deliver the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". The capacity to harness intuitively leads to the power to expedite efficiently. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be customer-defined, innovative? A company that can visualize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to harness faithfully. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a plan to become cross-media, integrated? At Sore Toe, Inc., we think we know how to whiteboard robustly. Without power shifts, you will lack mindshare. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a 24/7 game plan for regulating new infomediaries? We will synergize the capability of all-hands meetings to deliver. We will syndicate the commonly-used industry jargon "mission-critical". The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, long-term. We have come to know that if you unleash macro-vertically then you may also transition extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted term "micro-viral macro-mission-critical reporting" really mean? The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The e-services factor is web-enabled.