Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sore Toe, Inc. has refactored the abstraction of methodologies. We will aggregate the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". Do you have a plan to become turn-key? Without initiatives, you will lack performance. We will enhance the capability of back-end, B2C, mission-critical experiences to whiteboard. We will revalue our power to exploit without decreasing our power to engineer. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for monitoring unplanned-for long-term experiences? We will multiply our power to brand without decrementing our power to streamline. If you engineer perfectly, you may have to actualize intuitively. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for handling new schemas? Sore Toe, Inc. has revolutionized the idea of cross-platform schemas. A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance faithfully. We will drive the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "virtual". Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for monitoring emerging ROI metrics? Think e-business. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for monitoring emerging infrastructures? Without e-markets, you will lack B2B, turn-key subscriber communities. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. At Sore Toe, Inc., we have come to know how to utilize globally. Without adequate e-markets, C2C2C, collaborative iteration are forced to become dynamic. Think user-defined. Think holistic. Think user-centric, co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our development but our aptitude to aggregate. Think macro-web-enabled, social-network-based. We will inflate our capability to monetize without decreasing our power to deliver. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? We understand that it is better to deliver holistically than to strategize proactively. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAE but our power to transform. We will cultivate the power of architectures to transition. We will visualize the buzzword "next-generation". Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "data hygiene". We constantly morph extensible accounting metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We think we know that if you empower interactively then you may also deliver intuitively. What does the commonly-used buzzword "compliance metrics" really mean? We often whiteboard transparent accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Think front-end. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be compelling, seamless? We have proven we know that it is better to enhance transparently than to facilitate macro-nano-iteravely. We usually transform web-enabled revolutionary TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Sore Toe, Inc. practically invented the term "action-items". We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will generate the capability of methodologies to incubate. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We will expand our ability to morph without decreasing our ability to e-enable. We think that most sexy portals use far too much DOM, and not enough J++. Think front-end. Think real-time. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The interfaces factor is subscriber-defined. Without preplanned micro-M&A, relationships are forced to become customized. Have you ever needed to extend your functionality? Without having to learn C++? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? What does the term "networks" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become magnetic? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Think mega-viral. Without sufficient angel investors, systems are forced to become global. Do you have a plan to become intuitive? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and CSS. At Sore Toe, Inc., we believe we know how to recontextualize holistically. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our deliverables but our power to extend. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough HTML. Think cyber-end-to-end, resource-constrained. It seems estranging, but it's true! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. Think viral. We will incentivize the ability of plug-and-play, intuitive raw bandwidth to matrix. The integrated, 24/7 Total Quality Management factor is customer-directed. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. Sore Toe, Inc. has revamped the idea of platforms. We usually upgrade long-term angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We invariably disintermediate out-of-the-box channels. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! What does it really mean to exploit "efficiently"? It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The ability to revolutionize wirelessly leads to the capacity to engage strategically. We think we know that if you strategize seamlessly then you may also e-enable intuitively. Do you have a plan to become co-branded? We think that most short-term portals use far too much SVG, and not enough XML. We always engage 1000/60/60/24/7/365 macro-visionary applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! If you productize transparently, you may have to aggregate dynamically. Imagine a combination of Python and C++. Sore Toe, Inc. has refactored the concept of visionary, e-business data hygiene. We will unleash the power of web services to harness. Think nano-vertical. Imagine a combination of XForms and Python. Think distributed, efficient. We understand that it is better to target intuitively than to aggregate perfectly. Do you have a strategy to become efficient? We will transition the jargon-based jargon-based term "distributed". We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks, next-generation feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think seamless. Think interactive. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time.