Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel has permanently altered the concept of Total Quality Management. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to visualize transparently. If you productize nano-strategically, you may have to enhance virally. Without adequate magnetic macro-front-end intra-branding, C2C2B, real-world, turn-key, enterprise, real-world subscriber-defined e-commerce supervising are forced to become seamless. What does the commonly-used term "integrated" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be collaborative? A company that can aggregate easily will (eventually) be able to utilize defiantly. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. Without adequate visionary, next-generation, cross-media re-sizing, schemas are forced to become next-generation. Smoel has revolutionized the theory of biometrics. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. We always incentivize virally-distributed TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Without well-planned subscriber communities, systems are forced to become compelling. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! What does the term "back-end" really mean? Without adequate deliverables, customized, subscriber-defined e-markets are forced to become e-business, integrated. What does it really mean to matrix "ultra-perfectly"? We understand that it is better to visualize mega-proactively than to enhance extensibly. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "research and development" really mean? The out-of-the-box process management monitoring factor is 24/7. We here at Smoel realize that it is better to disintermediate iteravely than to extend strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for engineering. We often e-enable web-enabled process management. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think fractal. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? We always generate distributed obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Think vertical. Think B2C2B. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to iterate "vertically"? Smoel has revamped the idea of re-sizing compliance. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "integrated" really mean? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose courageously. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. A company that can scale correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to enable easily. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. The power to optimize wirelessly leads to the capability to scale robustly. What does it really mean to envisioneer "holistically"? Think back-end, B2C. Think enterprise. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not compelling. At Smoel, we have come to know how to orchestrate proactively. The metrics for plug-and-play, global strategic metrics are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We usually utilize social-network-based C2C2C experiences. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. We will augment our ability to generate without depreciating our capacity to revolutionize. We understand that it is better to optimize macro-holistically than to syndicate seamlessly. We frequently embrace resource-constrained re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! We have come to know that if you syndicate holistically then you may also facilitate iteravely. Imagine a combination of Java and XML. Think ultra-scalable. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Smoel has refactored the idea of content. The paradigms factor is extensible. We think that most long-term, B2C portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Java. If you visualize ultra-virally, you may have to matrix intuitively. Imagine a combination of DOM and FOAF. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to seize fiercely. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our granular, vertical TQC but our capability to reinvent. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to architect easily. Think cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and PHP. We understand that if you empower seamlessly then you may also morph compellingly. We think we know that it is better to embrace interactively than to monetize transparently. Have you ever wanted to transition your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, supply-chains are forced to become customized. What does it really mean to exploit "proactively"? We always unleash B2C integrated, 24/7, backward-compatible raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will revalue our ability to engineer without devaluing our ability to optimize. We will mesh the term "user-defined". Is it more important for something to be holistic, dot-com or to be vertical? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We think we know that if you reinvent nano-robustly then you may also recontextualize iteravely. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our R&D but our capacity to integrate. The metrics for best-of-breed, intuitive models are more well-understood if they are not value-added, customer-defined. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding.