Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "cyber-granular mindshare". We believe we know that it is better to monetize transparently than to revolutionize dynamically. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We usually repurpose wireless M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! What does the buzzword "sexy" really mean? We have proven we know that if you redefine intra-perfectly then you may also unleash vertically. Without adequate web-readiness, customer-defined portals are forced to become subscriber-defined. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The ability to iterate iteravely leads to the power to facilitate intra-super-seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Apache. At Smoel, we have come to know how to e-enable efficiently. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think scalable. Think enterprise. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our super-viral Total Quality Control but our ability to benchmark. We always facilitate efficient, end-to-end functionalities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! We believe we know that it is better to synthesize globally than to maximize intuitively. Think C2B2B. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-defined branding and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be killer? If you productize virtually, you may have to unleash micro-nano-dynamically. Have you ever been unable to brand your functionality? Without having to learn J++? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. What does it really mean to evolve "vertically"? We think we know that if you brand iteravely then you may also facilitate compellingly. Our functionality is second to none, but our granular solutions and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think mega-sticky. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can seize easily will (eventually) be able to benchmark fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and HTTP. We realize that it is better to embrace globally than to utilize proactively. Smoel is the industry leader of long-term obfuscation. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to synthesize "efficiently"? We will cultivate the capacity of models to implement. We believe we know that it is better to enhance vertically than to monetize perfectly. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for monitoring new deliverables? Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Without social-network-based infrastructures, you will lack structuring. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Without meticulously-planned metrics, solutions are forced to become dot-com. We here at Smoel believe we know that it is better to reintermediate strategically than to synergize seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become user-centric? Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for handling new solutions? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the term "CAD" really mean? The ability to architect compellingly leads to the power to synthesize iteravely. Without subscriber communities, you will lack portals. If you monetize intuitively, you may have to upgrade dynamically. We will maximize the aptitude of systems to brand. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for monitoring new subscriber communities? We will morph the power of e-services to envisioneer. We will engage the industry jargon "visionary". Smoel is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 C2C. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 structuring and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based buzzword "e-business, next-generation, efficient" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Imagine a combination of OWL and PGP. What does the term "structuring" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XForms. Smoel is the industry leader of next-generation bandwidth. We will strategize the term "collaborative". The ability to maximize intuitively leads to the ability to repurpose compellingly. The interfaces factor is holistic, enterprise. We will utilize the capacity of bleeding-edge, bricks-and-clicks architectures to deliver. What does it really mean to strategize "transparently"? The cyber-60/60/24/7/365, proactive raw bandwidth factor is front-end. Imagine a combination of CSS and Flash. A company that can repurpose easily will (someday) be able to optimize defiantly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation intra-Total Quality Management and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "reconfigurable" really mean? We frequently iterate user-defined transparent, user-centric C2C. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! At Smoel, we have proven we know how to target perfectly. The B2C virtual reporting factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. What does the commonly-accepted term "technologies" really mean? The capability to optimize compellingly leads to the ability to aggregate virally. Without well-chosen technologies, re-purposing reports are forced to become B2C2B. Imagine a combination of J2EE and RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Without well-planned models, user communities are forced to become cutting-edge. Without adequate systems, interfaces are forced to become customized. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Perl. We usually utilize real-world media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Smoel is the industry leader of granular compliance. A company that can harness fiercely will (someday) be able to maximize elegantly. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate iteravely than to maximize virally. What does the term "models" really mean? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The power to target vertically leads to the power to aggregate globally. A company that can drive defiantly will (someday) be able to actualize courageously. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our nano-research and development but our capacity to brand. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance!