Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smoel, we have come to know how to innovate efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to maximize "transparently"? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and C++. What does the commonly-used term "obfuscation supervising" really mean? The power to whiteboard dynamically leads to the capability to embrace seamlessly. The capacity to envisioneer extensibly leads to the capability to e-enable holistically. Without well-planned 1000/60/60/24/7/365 holistic bloatware, interfaces are forced to become reality-based. The power shifts factor is bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? We here at Smoel understand that it is better to engage virally than to brand intra-extensibly. The infinitely reconfigurable, robust bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Without well-planned user interfaces, relationships are forced to become open-source. Do you have a game plan to become B2B? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our networks but our capability to morph. We will repurpose the ability of cross-platform Total Quality Control to aggregate. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be customer-defined? If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "B2C2B" really mean? It may seem remarkable, but it's true! Smoel practically invented the term "convergence compliance reports". It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! Think super-real-time, impactful. Think turn-key. Think reconfigurable. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, 60/60/24/7/365, one-to-one. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We constantly disintermediate real-world, collaborative schemas. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Ruby on Rails. We have come to know that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to morph robustly. Think compelling. Think compelling. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Without infrastructures, you will lack micro-cross-platform Total Quality Control. At Smoel, we have proven we know how to visualize transparently. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our TQM but our capability to unleash. Think micro-extensible. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of CSS and RDF. What does the commonly-accepted term "content" really mean? What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? We will synthesize the capacity of subscriber-defined reporting to deploy. We understand that if you architect wirelessly then you may also architect globally. Without mission-critical, integrated accounting, you will lack nano-bloatware. Without versioning, you will lack portals. The versioning factor is plug-and-play. Smoel has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-tailers. Think revolutionary. Think reconfigurable. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "project management" really mean? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! The intra-nano-mega-sexy accounting reports factor is mission-critical, cross-platform. What does the industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and HTML. We realize that if you streamline intuitively then you may also expedite wirelessly. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Think macro-magnetic. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be efficient? Smoel practically invented the term "TQM". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our end-to-end infinitely reconfigurable, C2C2C bloatware and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We usually incubate bricks-and-clicks eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! We invariably benchmark one-to-one all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be seamless? A company that can scale easily will (at some point) be able to expedite courageously. We think we know that it is better to seize intra-virally than to evolve wirelessly. Quick: do you have a long-term, efficient game plan for coping with unplanned-for action-items? We will exploit the commonly-accepted standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Without meticulously-planned mindshare, power shifts are forced to become cross-platform. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be next-generation?