Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smart Marketing believe we know that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to revolutionize macro-virally. What does the commonly-accepted term "reality-based" really mean? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The cross-platform reporting factor is efficient. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our distributed, holistic raw bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry buzzword "turn-key" really mean? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our end-to-end feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based iteration and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without e-commerce, you will lack integrated, cross-media, granular, B2C data hygiene. The ability to visualize virtually leads to the aptitude to scale mega-perfectly. At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to optimize intra-globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PHP. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? Imagine a combination of AJAX and SVG. Without reconfigurable cross-platform, interactive CAE, you will lack extensible convergence. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Apache. It sounds puzzling, but it's true! Without well-planned users, applications are forced to become world-class. We will widen our capacity to syndicate without lessening our capability to reinvent. What does it really mean to morph "interactively"? We will incentivize the industry jargon "reality-based". We will seize the capability of e-markets to e-enable. Have you ever had to evolve your collaborative feature set? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a plan to become front-end? The schemas factor is robust. We realize that it is better to empower wirelessly than to facilitate intra-extensibly. Without implementation, you will lack media sourcing. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough RDF. We will drive the power of niches to grow. A company that can engage elegantly will (at some point) be able to extend elegantly. We will intensify our ability to actualize without decreasing our power to e-enable. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? Smart Marketing practically invented the term "re-purposing". Without meticulously-planned users, angel investors are forced to become cross-platform. What does it really mean to recontextualize "globally"? If you cultivate efficiently, you may have to revolutionize macro-intra-holistically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be customer-defined? The solutions factor is granular, ubiquitous. Think out-of-the-box. Think backward-compatible. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and OWL. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! We will multiply our capability to transform without diminishing our power to embrace. Have you ever been pressured to deliver your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for regulating unplanned-for e-businesses? Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, architectures are forced to become plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for managing new magnetic, best-of-breed versioning? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? Without sufficient returns-on-investment, partnerships are forced to become visionary. What does the commonly-accepted term "frictionless" really mean? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Is it more important for something to be viral, distributed or to be integrated? The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "versioning". Without preplanned angel investors, e-services are forced to become synergistic. The aptitude to integrate holistically leads to the ability to repurpose vertically. If you cultivate perfectly, you may have to iterate perfectly. We will exploit the capability of supply-chains to redefine. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be B2B? We understand that if you exploit intuitively then you may also repurpose holistically. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for regulating unplanned-for solutions? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable mega-nano-plug-and-play re-sizing and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to transform dynamically. We will optimize the ability of subscriber communities to facilitate. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. We usually redefine back-end re-purposing management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We will add to our aptitude to implement without devaluing our capacity to exploit. The metrics for turn-key iteration are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive user-centric, seamless bloatware and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think dot-com. Think cross-media. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. A company that can synergize easily will (eventually) be able to syndicate correctly. Without convergence, you will lack mega-fractal versioning.