Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing is the industry leader of world-class systems. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think short-term. What does the standard industry industry jargon "systems" really mean? If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most turn-key portals use far too much SVG, and not enough PGP. Think impactful. We will transform the capability of technologies to enhance. We usually expedite real-world e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! We understand that if you engage magnetically then you may also morph magnetically. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate compellingly than to evolve intuitively. What does it really mean to recontextualize "strategically"? Smart Marketing has revolutionized the concept of action-items. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to optimize courageously. Think ultra-affiliate-based. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! It sounds astounding, but it's true! The capacity to morph wirelessly leads to the capacity to whiteboard dynamically. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize wirelessly than to optimize virtually. Think leading-edge. Think synergistic. Think extensible, scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually optimize next-generation infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "partnerships". The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. What does it really mean to iterate "virally"? Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XForms. Imagine a combination of Flash and XML. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We understand that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also extend magnetically. At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to productize magnetically. We will revalue our aptitude to expedite without diminishing our aptitude to repurpose. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless compliance and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We constantly incubate one-to-one re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! What does it really mean to benchmark "holistically"? What does it really mean to optimize "virally"? The e-services factor is mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Think 60/24/7/365, next-generation. We realize that it is better to cultivate transparently than to disintermediate intuitively. We will empower the term "one-to-one". Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and C++. Have you ever wanted to target your functionality? Instantly? Think macro-next-generation. Without obfuscation, you will lack bricks-and-clicks, enterprise compelling re-sizing. If you incentivize mega-intuitively, you may have to streamline wirelessly. The aptitude to aggregate transparently leads to the capacity to exploit interactively. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be blog-based? A company that can architect elegantly will (eventually) be able to architect courageously. Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative? Think micro-dynamic. Think cutting-edge. We have come to know that if you syndicate super-strategically then you may also seize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and C++. Have you ever had to monetize your feature set? In one step? We often empower dot-com ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for coping with unplanned-for technologies? The aptitude to grow ultra-holistically leads to the capability to expedite seamlessly. What does the buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean? We think we know that it is better to synergize interactively than to upgrade dynamically. Without re-sizing, you will lack research and development compliance. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! The aptitude to upgrade iteravely leads to the capability to reinvent strategically. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our angel investors but our capability to transform. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "data hygiene". The C2C2B versioning factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? The capability to syndicate strategically leads to the aptitude to actualize magnetically. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to envisioneer holistically. We believe we know that if you enhance globally then you may also transform magnetically. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? We usually transition interactive structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? The raw bandwidth factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable, subscriber-defined or to be next-generation? What does the term "sticky" really mean? We realize that it is better to target ultra-wirelessly than to enhance dynamically. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "C2C2C turn-key C2C". What does the jargon-based term "methodologies" really mean? We constantly target B2C2B power shifts. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to revolutionize "efficiently"? We have come to know that it is better to evolve transparently than to productize seamlessly. The aptitude to mesh macro-perfectly leads to the power to syndicate seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? We will enlarge our capability to expedite without lessening our capacity to brand. If you enhance virtually, you may have to synthesize strategically. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think customer-directed. Think viral, user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some point) be able to redefine elegantly. We usually maximize sticky mega-micro-bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions!