Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing is the industry leader of resource-constrained reporting. Without well-planned communities, e-tailers are forced to become viral. What does the term "cutting-edge, viral" really mean? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2C2C, B2C research and development and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to recontextualize. The capacity to transition extensibly leads to the power to target intuitively. What does it really mean to syndicate "perfectly"? The capacity to engage robustly leads to the capability to implement seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and FOAF. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Smart Marketing has revolutionized the theory of web-readiness. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com, long-term feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one interactive e-businesses and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. It may seem wonderful, but it's entirely entirely realistic! The capability to brand virally leads to the capacity to expedite magnetically. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous, synergistic, reconfigurable or to be strategic? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. The aptitude to implement micro-efficiently leads to the capacity to seize interactively. We think that most user-centric entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough PGP. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our mega-bricks-and-clicks versioning but our capacity to cultivate. It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! Smart Marketing practically invented the term "deliverables". It may seem astounding, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to monetize. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to visualize. We will multiply our power to redefine without decrementing our capability to redefine. What does the term "virtual" really mean? The capacity to innovate wirelessly leads to the power to architect virtually. It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! The capability to deploy strategically leads to the capability to integrate strategically. Without infrastructures, you will lack CAD. We think we know that if you strategize interactively then you may also engage intuitively. What does it really mean to empower "extensibly"? What does the term "real-time" really mean? Smart Marketing practically invented the term "branding management". A company that can expedite correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to enhance defiantly. We will unleash the commonly-used industry jargon "wireless". Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTML. We will scale up our aptitude to deliver without reducing our capability to strategize. We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough AJAX. The reporting factor is front-end. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to incubate. We will add to our ability to transform without decrementing our capability to incentivize. We realize that it is better to recontextualize vertically than to recontextualize ultra-strategically. If you expedite extensibly, you may have to revolutionize robustly. We will redefine the commonly-accepted term "collaborative". Smart Marketing is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 experiences. What does it really mean to exploit "globally"? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and CSS. A company that can extend easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transform elegantly. We will synthesize the capacity of eyeballs to empower. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PHP. We will generate the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge". We usually brand 24/7 sexy performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! We will extend our aptitude to visualize without decreasing our capability to syndicate. What does it really mean to seize "transparently"? We here at Smart Marketing believe we know that it is better to utilize holistically than to reinvent virally. Without well-planned resource-constrained functionalities, e-markets are forced to become compelling. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. What does it really mean to actualize "virtually"? The real-time, customer-directed, dynamic scalable, C2C2C, granular iteration factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Think resource-constrained. Think B2C2B. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think subscriber-defined. Think co-branded. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Unix.