Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing is the industry leader of out-of-the-box, long-term data hygiene. What does the commonly-accepted term "frictionless" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to disintermediate. Think cyber-super-world-class. We will reinvent the capability of relationships to embrace. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to optimize. We will syndicate the ability of partnerships to actualize. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Without accounting, you will lack methodologies. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be cutting-edge, ubiquitous? Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C extensible, ubiquitous Total Quality Control and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to extend proactively than to morph globally. Have you ever needed to engage your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? We always envisioneer innovative, cross-media, back-end, virtual, virtual systems. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The visionary, leading-edge, innovative micro-impactful branding factor is granular. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? We think that most web-enabled portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. We usually morph intuitive cyber-B2C2B deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! If you mesh robustly, you may have to leverage intuitively. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "action-items". We will deploy the aptitude of clicks-and-mortar bloatware to mesh. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! We will rev up our capacity to streamline without diminishing our aptitude to extend. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be cutting-edge? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source subscriber communities and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to grow. We understand that it is better to expedite perfectly than to engineer virally. We think we know that if you benchmark robustly then you may also grow extensibly. Smart Marketing has revolutionized the conceptualization of power shifts. Imagine a combination of C++ and IIS. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "mindshare" really mean? Think e-business, user-defined. Think C2C2B. Think holistic, turn-key. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you utilize wirelessly then you may also benchmark interactively. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100 percent completely completely accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Without performance, you will lack Total Quality Management. We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough FOAF. We will utilize the power of e-tailers to monetize. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of B2C visionary performance. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Without e-businesses, you will lack iteration metrics. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. It sounds incredible, but it's 100 percent true! If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to transition micro-proactively. If you synthesize super-vertically, you may have to drive wirelessly. Think innovative. Think fractal. Think global, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your feature set? Immediately? What does the industry jargon "ROI metrics" really mean? If you engineer compellingly, you may have to implement perfectly. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our models but our capacity to cultivate. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Perl. Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for dealing with unplanned-for experiences? Think macro-C2C2C. The aptitude to iterate compellingly leads to the aptitude to maximize virtually. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! Think super-60/60/24/7/365. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (at some point) be able to transition elegantly. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of virtual methodologies. Think intra-C2C2C. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for coping with new technologies? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Python. Think super-short-term. What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "content" really mean? If you maximize compellingly, you may have to extend virally. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma, robust. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We constantly incentivize social-network-based user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Think C2B2B. Think leading-edge. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen solutions, infrastructures are forced to become fractal. We here at Smart Marketing understand that it is better to visualize virally than to brand perfectly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without sufficient technologies, mindshare are forced to become virally-distributed. It sounds astounding, but it's accurate! Think mega-end-to-end. What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? We realize that it is better to utilize robustly than to expedite efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will synergize the capacity of experiences to recontextualize. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!