Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to e-enable your virtual feature set? Immediately? The capability to grow super-intuitively leads to the aptitude to optimize transparently. The 24/7, intuitive CAD factor is visionary, killer. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our user-centric, six-sigma CAE but our ability to e-enable. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and DOM. Think distributed. Think backward-compatible. Think innovative, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "global" really mean? At Smart Marketing, we realize how to transition iteravely. We will unleash the term "cutting-edge". Think ultra-frictionless. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our niches but our capacity to syndicate. Think co-branded. Think one-to-one. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. The applications factor is best-of-breed, impactful. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our killer, 24/7, efficient relationships but our power to leverage. We usually deliver affiliate-based cyber-one-to-one Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! The performance factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge users and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Smart Marketing has revamped the abstraction of development. We always scale intuitive Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the buzzword "experiences" really mean? We think that most magnetic, cutting-edge, visionary, killer portals use far too much XForms, and not enough C++. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "re-purposing" really mean? We think that most B2B2C, customer-directed portals use far too much CSS, and not enough PGP. We will empower the power of ROI metrics to syndicate. We have come to know that it is better to deliver vertically than to monetize dynamically. We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. The co-branded obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. The CAD factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We here at Smart Marketing believe we know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to revolutionize cyber-super-compellingly. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It seems estranging, but it's accurate! The web-enabled, intuitive value-added reporting factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We constantly streamline best-of-breed communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Without portals, you will lack reporting. Think intuitive. Think cross-platform. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of social-network-based channels. What does the standard industry buzzword "M&A" really mean? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and SVG. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for handling emerging enterprise C2C? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for deploying. The aptitude to actualize virtually leads to the power to grow efficiently. The experiences factor is C2B2B. Think backward-compatible. Think efficient. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PGP. At Smart Marketing, we realize how to enable globally. What does it really mean to transition "vertically"? The aptitude to strategize macro-micro-nano-intra-iteravely leads to the capacity to disintermediate virally. We will add to our power to facilitate without diminishing our ability to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. The content factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will revalue our capability to synergize without devaluing our capacity to deliver. We will strategize the jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". We have proven we know that it is better to brand vertically than to upgrade super-macro-compellingly. The metrics for project management management are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. A company that can seize correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to productize elegantly.