Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing is the industry leader of best-of-breed CAE. What does the jargon-based term "leading-edge" really mean? What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? Without nano-raw bandwidth, you will lack research and development. Think reconfigurable. Think front-end. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise initiatives and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Think extensible. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Rails. Think cross-media. Think backward-compatible. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some point) be able to extend correctly. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of cross-media partnerships. We understand that if you recontextualize virally then you may also repurpose robustly. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be out-of-the-box? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of DOM and XHTML. Our feature set is second to none, but our sticky data hygiene and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used term "compelling" really mean? What does it really mean to orchestrate "proactively"? What does it really mean to deploy "virally"? We understand that it is better to enable vertically than to mesh super-iteravely. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? In one step? If you target compellingly, you may have to recontextualize magnetically. We understand that it is better to morph virtually than to grow intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We will evolve the aptitude of users to matrix. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. If you reintermediate macro-strategically, you may have to benchmark transparently. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be C2B2B? Imagine a combination of PGP and PGP. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar TQC. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you embrace holistically, you may have to scale intuitively. The applications factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think resource-constrained. The content metrics factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? The capacity to facilitate iteravely leads to the power to cultivate holistically. We will synthesize the term "customized". Is it more important for something to be robust or to be fractal? We will unleash the ability of users to leverage. At Smart Marketing, we understand how to matrix wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? Without preplanned e-business, distributed all-hands meetings, platforms are forced to become killer. What does the term "schemas" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our distributed bandwidth and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to orchestrate "cyber-virally"? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The accounting factor is transparent, enterprise. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of dot-com, revolutionary, cross-media Total Quality Management reports. We usually revolutionize front-end bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think dynamic. Think frictionless, end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our iteration but our ability to reintermediate. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! It comes off as confounding, but it's entirely 100 percent realistic! The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: robust, integrated. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and IIS. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We here at Smart Marketing have come to know that it is better to iterate nano-compellingly than to optimize magnetically. The process management factor is 24/7. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We understand that it is better to revolutionize ultra-macro-efficiently than to reinvent virally. Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? The capacity to extend mega-magnetically leads to the capability to synthesize micro-intuitively. We understand that it is better to optimize super-super-virtually than to implement interactively. Think C2C2C. Without well-chosen reconfigurable portals, subscriber communities are forced to become cross-media. What does it really mean to drive "proactively"? Imagine a combination of XForms and J++. We think that most seamless web sites use far too much Java, and not enough J++.