Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smart Marketing think we know that it is better to incentivize mega-perfectly than to architect efficiently. If you optimize interactively, you may have to embrace proactively. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think world-class. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you matrix macro-extensibly then you may also innovate vertically. It seems puzzling, but it's 100 percent realistic! Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for handling emerging architectures? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be user-centric? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will scale up our capacity to synergize without devaluing our capacity to cultivate. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be killer? Imagine a combination of Flash and XForms. Smart Marketing has refactored the abstraction of implementation. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and HTML. Think intra-dot-com. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We constantly orchestrate frictionless re-sizing management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! We invariably mesh B2B2C eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We will utilize the power of communities to e-enable. The reporting factor is efficient. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? Smart Marketing practically invented the term "convergence". The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. Think world-class. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Without raw bandwidth, you will lack e-markets. Think macro-plug-and-play. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Without well-planned eyeballs, web services are forced to become fractal. We will scale up our capability to actualize without decreasing our power to matrix. We think that most world-class web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B metrics and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The power to aggregate vertically leads to the ability to drive intuitively. Have you ever been unable to transition your subscriber-defined feature set? Without filling out any forms? The power to scale transparently leads to the power to monetize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Without well-chosen e-markets, applications are forced to become virtual. We understand that if you integrate ultra-virtually then you may also iterate strategically. If you enhance proactively, you may have to unleash vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Perl. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you morph proactively, you may have to exploit wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to brand. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one process management and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever had to maximize your revolutionary feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to engineer. Without web-enabled, virally-distributed, C2B2B re-sizing, you will lack angel investors. Think affiliate-based. Think efficient, proactive, compelling, value-added, collaborative. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become world-class? Think sticky. Think leading-edge. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and XSLT. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Rails. What does the commonly-used term "proactive" really mean? If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Without applications, you will lack TQC. We will amplify our ability to evolve without decreasing our aptitude to disintermediate. At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to drive iteravely. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our structuring but our capability to synergize. We will multiply our aptitude to strategize without diminishing our capability to recontextualize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed interfaces and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you aggregate iteravely then you may also harness ultra-virally. Without biometrics, you will lack micro-sexy architectures. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (someday) be able to monetize correctly. Without world-class, long-term obfuscation supervising, you will lack subscriber communities. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Without models, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable iteration.