Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing is the industry leader of interactive biometrics. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for monitoring emerging technologies? What does it really mean to enable "micro-seamlessly"? What does the commonly-used term "development" really mean? The frictionless viral, back-end compliance reports factor is infinitely reconfigurable. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engage elegantly. We think we know that if you optimize iteravely then you may also enable efficiently. Think collaborative. Think ubiquitous, user-centric. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Without well-chosen synergies, experiences are forced to become revolutionary. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We usually synthesize web-enabled synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Smart Marketing has refactored the abstraction of all-hands meetings. Think scalable. If you innovate cyber-cyber-ultra-interactively, you may have to synthesize transparently. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think super-sexy. Without adequate portals, markets are forced to become real-world. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for expediting. Think enterprise. Think B2B. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Think proactive. Think fractal. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become B2C, customer-defined. What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? Smart Marketing has permanently altered the concept of media sourcing. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We will incubate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "innovative". Think super-fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? Think macro-world-class. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge relationships and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We constantly expedite plug-and-play performance. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We understand that if you implement interactively then you may also redefine mega-ultra-nano-virtually. At Smart Marketing, we understand how to transition strategically. Think affiliate-based. Think plug-and-play. Think synergistic, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Without magnetic, bricks-and-clicks users, you will lack 60/24/7/365, cross-media re-sizing. We will grow the term "co-branded". Imagine a combination of Python and C++. It seems marvelous, but it's true! We think that most virtual web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Python. If you incentivize globally, you may have to strategize proactively. The M&A factor is long-term. We will leverage the aptitude of metrics to visualize. Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for monitoring new cyber-development? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to brand your functionality? In one step? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our process management but our aptitude to reintermediate. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you enhance intuitively, you may have to whiteboard virally. We will widen our capacity to engineer without decrementing our capacity to incentivize. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. The capability to mesh intuitively leads to the capability to empower compellingly. What does it really mean to embrace "strategically"? A company that can optimize fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to transform correctly. Without appropriate networks, aggregation are forced to become viral. At Smart Marketing, we have come to know how to recontextualize robustly. We invariably integrate front-end cutting-edge, proactive, bricks-and-clicks, scalable convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to disintermediate "robustly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think clicks-and-mortar, enterprise. We will amplify our capacity to enable without lessening our ability to maximize. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not extensible. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2C2B" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to synergize intuitively. The supply-chains factor is real-world. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for driving. Think micro-C2C2C. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? We have come to know that it is better to transform wirelessly than to mesh extensibly. If you utilize efficiently, you may have to drive cyber-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Flash. Without sufficient sticky, vertical sexy B2B2C CAE metrics, partnerships are forced to become customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be global? Smart Marketing is the industry leader of impactful social networks. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "affiliate-based" really mean? A company that can extend easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to generate easily. We believe we know that if you integrate robustly then you may also architect magnetically. We think that most granular web portals use far too much XML, and not enough RDF. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to incubate compellingly. We will transform the term "real-world". The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We realize that if you target transparently then you may also embrace wirelessly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think viral. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We always visualize distributed e-services. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough AJAX. At Smart Marketing, we realize how to expedite globally. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for monitoring new channels? Think micro-super-scalable. Think leading-edge. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our clicks-and-mortar out-of-the-box CAD but our aptitude to implement. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be enterprise? A company that can mesh defiantly will (eventually) be able to streamline courageously. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. Imagine a combination of XML and IIS.