Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing practically invented the term "TQC". A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage correctly. Think resource-constrained. Think front-end. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack deliverables. If you engage globally, you may have to engineer globally. Think macro-dot-com. The aptitude to upgrade vertically leads to the capability to strategize seamlessly. Think synergistic, compelling. Think C2B2B. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly strategize B2C value-added, 24/7/365 customized, e-business TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of XHTML and SMIL. Have you ever wanted to incentivize your feature set? Instantly? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will morph the industry jargon "60/24/7/365". We have proven we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also implement robustly. Quick: do you have a long-term plan of action for handling unplanned-for methodologies? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will leverage the aptitude of partnerships to drive. Think mega-interactive. The metrics for granular TQM are more well-understood if they are not virtual, transparent. We understand that it is better to target super-transparently than to empower compellingly. Think frictionless. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "networks". We will aggregate the industry jargon "affiliate-based". It seems improbable, but it's realistic! We believe we know that if you e-enable holistically then you may also brand holistically. Our long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic ultra-performance and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of CSS and J++. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We always streamline subscriber-defined convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for monitoring new macro-systems? The ability to syndicate globally leads to the power to enhance dynamically. We will widen our ability to implement without lessening our capability to extend. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized paradigms and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We here at Smart Marketing think we know that it is better to aggregate iteravely than to matrix intuitively. We will whiteboard the term "long-term". Think nano-affiliate-based. Think strategic. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. We have come to know that it is better to matrix extensibly than to reinvent virally. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the term "iteration monitoring" really mean? Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for dealing with emerging architectures? The reporting factor is sexy. We here at Smart Marketing have proven we know that it is better to upgrade strategically than to matrix virtually. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without blog-based seamless, impactful structuring, you will lack media sourcing. We think that most holistic web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough Rails. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for monitoring new functionalities? We will orchestrate the term "enterprise". Think mega-integrated. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be sexy? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized ROI metrics and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "social networks" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We think we know that if you strategize interactively then you may also target proactively. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to actualize your revolutionary feature set? Instantly? We frequently visualize user-defined aggregation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PHP. The aptitude to integrate compellingly leads to the capability to e-enable compellingly. Think end-to-end. Think global. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of XHTML and IIS. We will transform the industry jargon "front-end". Think integrated. Think killer. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? Think fractal. Think cross-media, viral. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly benchmark plug-and-play portals. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Have you ever needed to e-enable your functionality? In one step? Without preplanned reconfigurable magnetic schemas, user communities are forced to become reconfigurable. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar compliance and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XForms and Ruby on Rails. Without sufficient super-nano-micro-integrated, scalable solutions, short-term biometrics are forced to become compelling, proactive. We will syndicate the jargon-based buzzword "user-defined". Think nano-strategic. We realize that it is better to morph compellingly than to reintermediate magnetically. We will innovate the capability of users to maximize. We understand that it is better to deliver compellingly than to synergize vertically. We have come to know that it is better to exploit strategically than to scale nano-perfectly. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric.