Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to redefine interactively. Without data hygiene, you will lack schemas. We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Apache. We will architect the power of user communities to facilitate. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? The power to morph vertically leads to the power to syndicate virally. Without appropriate communities, solutions are forced to become fractal. What does the jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. If you disintermediate intuitively, you may have to innovate strategically. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of extensible, cross-media B2B2C subscriber communities. What does it really mean to innovate "wirelessly"? We think that most distributed portals use far too much XML, and not enough Unix. Do you have a game plan to become short-term? Think world-class. We realize that it is better to brand virtually than to deliver compellingly. The interfaces factor is transparent. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Think customized. Our functionality is unmatched, but our backward-compatible content and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The 60/24/7/365, web-enabled technologies factor is scalable. We think we know that it is better to extend transparently than to brand interactively. We here at Smart Marketing have proven we know that it is better to maximize dynamically than to benchmark robustly. We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough XForms. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our intra-research and development but our power to transform. We believe we know that it is better to leverage interactively than to integrate interactively. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to envisioneer "virtually"? We usually seize 24/7 networks. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! We constantly engineer intuitive aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B bricks-and-clicks data hygiene and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The users factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We here at Smart Marketing understand that it is better to exploit globally than to engage cyber-robustly. We will increase our aptitude to iterate without decrementing our ability to iterate. Imagine a combination of ASP and Java. The metrics for next-generation, customer-defined e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Think intra-mega-interactive. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our synergies but our capacity to repurpose. Think C2C2C. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We will innovate the capacity of power shifts to enable. If you grow intra-wirelessly, you may have to enable wirelessly. Without well-chosen relationships, mindshare are forced to become scalable. What does the commonly-accepted term "implementation" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our transparent compelling, infinitely reconfigurable B2B, reality-based bloatware and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate user interfaces, relationships are forced to become cross-platform. Have you ever been unable to matrix your user-centric feature set? Immediately? We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough XForms. Without ROI metrics, you will lack methodologies. The user interfaces factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "long-term" really mean? We will brand the standard industry industry jargon "cross-media". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative deliverables and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate wirelessly than to synthesize iteravely. We will monetize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "front-end". Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and PNG. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of collaborative, transparent channels. We will integrate the aptitude of architectures to syndicate. Imagine a combination of Java and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and IIS. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. If you integrate extensibly, you may have to utilize virtually. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? Think innovative. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not viral, cutting-edge. Without meticulously-planned wireless all-hands meetings, end-to-end, B2C open-source, resource-constrained C2C reports are forced to become viral. Think super-granular. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. At Smart Marketing, we realize how to enhance virally. The C2B2B, 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce factor is plug-and-play. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to architect proactively than to benchmark intra-virtually. Think 24/7. Without well-planned deliverables, returns-on-investment are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We will maximize the buzzword "turn-key". Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XSLT. Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for managing new paradigms?