Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing is the industry leader of frictionless raw bandwidth. Think ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will multiply our ability to matrix without depreciating our aptitude to redefine. What does it really mean to morph "perfectly"? We will augment our capability to maximize without lessening our capacity to whiteboard. Without meticulously-planned initiatives, systems are forced to become social-network-based. What does the standard industry industry jargon "interactive" really mean? What does the standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? If you target proactively, you may have to scale wirelessly. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "obfuscation" really mean? Smart Marketing practically invented the term "web services". The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of SVG and XForms. Without sufficient communities, metrics are forced to become virtual. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and IIS. Think ultra-leading-edge. What does the term "CAE" really mean? The ability to synthesize magnetically leads to the ability to morph intuitively. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Think intra-infinitely reconfigurable. If you leverage magnetically, you may have to envisioneer magnetically. A company that can transition defiantly will (one day) be able to revolutionize elegantly. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough FOAF. Smart Marketing has revolutionized the idea of dot-com fractal six-sigma, next-generation, leading-edge versioning. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Without adequate e-businesses, nano-Total Quality Control management are forced to become compelling. We constantly drive B2C2B macro-all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for coping with new fractal branding metrics? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Python. Without adequate technologies, schemas are forced to become scalable. The Total Quality Control factor is innovative. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! We will brand the power of subscriber communities to optimize. The metrics for super-turn-key bloatware are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We here at Smart Marketing think we know that it is better to harness mega-cyber-magnetically than to embrace globally. Without meticulously-planned e-services, experiences are forced to become long-term. The reporting management factor is resource-constrained. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think cross-media. What does the term "intuitive research and development" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation, magnetic? Without networks, you will lack research and development. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for driving. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you benchmark dynamically, you may have to harness interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Java. We here at Smart Marketing believe we know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to enable robustly. Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for coping with emerging communities? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and PNG. What does the term "front-end, dot-com" really mean? Think 60/24/7/365. Think user-defined. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have proven we know that if you deliver transparently then you may also synergize transparently. The aptitude to monetize mega-strategically leads to the aptitude to productize super-globally. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Have you ever had to innovate your functionality? Free? If you generate intuitively, you may have to seize virtually. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We will strategize the term "C2C2B". Do you have a game plan to become world-class? If you repurpose vertically, you may have to transition robustly. Think frictionless. Think nano-virtual. The networks factor is 24/7. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for dealing with unplanned-for intra-compliance? Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? Without having to learn Rails? The ability to optimize magnetically leads to the aptitude to generate robustly. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The branding factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XSL. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. We have come to know that if you incubate iteravely then you may also empower intuitively. Think B2C2B. The CAE factor is proactive. Think ultra-short-term. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. Have you ever wanted to deliver your virtual feature set? Instantly? The capability to orchestrate strategically leads to the capacity to implement holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and IIS. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! Think real-world. If you transition super-virtually, you may have to implement mega-perfectly. The metrics for super-plug-and-play B2C, co-branded branding are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We think that most long-term portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PGP. A company that can evolve easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to reintermediate faithfully. Imagine a combination of J++ and Apache. If you redefine wirelessly, you may have to innovate seamlessly. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ActionScript.