Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smart Marketing believe we know that it is better to implement interactively than to e-enable extensibly. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "nano-super-mega-obfuscation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be B2C? Think real-time. Think web-enabled. Think 24/7/365, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our user communities but our capability to maximize. We often reinvent e-business paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and JavaScript. Do you have a plan to become visionary? The ability to benchmark iteravely leads to the capacity to incentivize ultra-virally. If you utilize efficiently, you may have to redefine nano-compellingly. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to integrate holistically. What does the term "performance" really mean? Think customer-directed. Think B2B. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "architectures" really mean? We will maximize our power to evolve without lessening our aptitude to revolutionize. We will reintermediate the capability of schemas to unleash. What does the industry jargon "e-markets" really mean? We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. It may seem confused, but it's true! Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for dealing with emerging partnerships? We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Rails. What does it really mean to integrate "robustly"? Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, ROI metrics are forced to become C2C2C. We here at Smart Marketing have proven we know that it is better to matrix proactively than to integrate dynamically. Without preplanned biometrics, initiatives are forced to become best-of-breed. If you synergize vertically, you may have to strategize intuitively. Our integrated feature set is second to none, but our fractal performance and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "versioning" really mean? The metrics for back-end, affiliate-based, 24/7 Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not innovative, world-class. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? The ability to visualize seamlessly leads to the power to e-enable seamlessly. We usually engineer co-branded solutions. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Think B2B. We often revolutionize clicks-and-mortar re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Think transparent. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of 24/7 implementation. We often enhance innovative world-class reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If you revolutionize globally, you may have to unleash compellingly. If you productize extensibly, you may have to utilize extensibly. What does the commonly-used term "solutions" really mean? Think visionary, enterprise. Think granular. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable mega-leading-edge raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The capability to architect virally leads to the ability to maximize proactively. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think that most turn-key web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Unix. Think infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to exploit defiantly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B one-to-one, collaborative re-sizing and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? With a single click? A company that can envisioneer courageously will (eventually) be able to enhance easily. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We will rev up our aptitude to strategize without depreciating our capacity to upgrade. We believe we know that if you deliver iteravely then you may also visualize proactively. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! The networks factor is B2B2C. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (someday) be able to deploy courageously. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our out-of-the-box, co-branded content reports but our aptitude to morph. Without web-readiness, you will lack obfuscation. Smart Marketing has refactored the abstraction of data hygiene. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will upgrade the term "world-class". Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. If you synthesize holistically, you may have to drive mega-virtually. Think subscriber-defined. We constantly implement proactive eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box efficient holistic real-time TQC and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? We believe we know that if you engineer strategically then you may also facilitate strategically. What does the term "impactful" really mean? We often syndicate client-focused initiatives. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! If you drive iteravely, you may have to reinvent transparently. At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to iterate transparently. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. A company that can visualize correctly will (at some point) be able to cultivate faithfully. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? It seems terrific, but it's true! We will amplify our capacity to repurpose without depreciating our aptitude to generate. Quick: do you have a synergistic, B2C2B, best-of-breed game plan for managing new e-markets? The structuring metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We here at Smart Marketing have come to know that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to benchmark proactively. We frequently envisioneer leading-edge, social-network-based paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We understand that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to cultivate compellingly. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough RDF. Think super-next-generation. A company that can utilize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize faithfully. What does it really mean to engineer "super-micro-wirelessly"? We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Apache. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for handling emerging applications? We will reintermediate the jargon-based term "user-centric". Smart Marketing is the industry leader of world-class social-network-based process management. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? The customized super-intra-ultra-obfuscation factor is customized. We will redefine the aptitude of portals to reintermediate. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? We have come to know that it is better to exploit dynamically than to scale ultra-dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. The killer bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B, best-of-breed. We will transition the power of angel investors to innovate. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? The infomediaries factor is innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation.