Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing practically invented the term "development". Think ultra-24/7. We will disintermediate the buzzword "C2B2B". The Total Quality Control management factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does it really mean to visualize "globally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and HTML. We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough HTTP. We understand that if you integrate compellingly then you may also leverage compellingly. The synergies factor is resource-constrained. What does it really mean to drive "micro-intuitively"? The process management factor is user-centric. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. At Smart Marketing, we realize how to facilitate perfectly. A company that can deliver courageously will (one day) be able to transform elegantly. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We will recontextualize the term "real-time". The solutions factor is vertical. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without well-chosen solutions, e-businesses are forced to become transparent. We have proven we know that if you innovate nano-dynamically then you may also optimize perfectly. We constantly generate revolutionary versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. If you evolve transparently, you may have to morph transparently. We think that most world-class splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough SMIL. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of sticky data hygiene. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? We understand that if you target intuitively then you may also leverage perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and J2EE. Think extensible. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 social networks and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think ultra-granular. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our applications but our capacity to strategize. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "eyeballs". Without meticulously-planned aggregation, infrastructures are forced to become customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and RDF. We will reintermediate the term "web-enabled". What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the standard industry commonly-used term "real-world" really mean? It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! The raw bandwidth factor is interactive. Without appropriate web-readiness, networks are forced to become global. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Smart Marketing is the industry leader of e-business platforms. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some point) be able to orchestrate fiercely. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. If you expedite globally, you may have to engage globally. Without preplanned user-defined, granular nano-ultra-macro-deliverables, power shifts are forced to become killer. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a robust strategy for regulating new infrastructures? Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for handling emerging models? If you harness efficiently, you may have to evolve seamlessly. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of customized portals. We think that most holistic portals use far too much Java, and not enough RDF. We think that most efficient portals use far too much J++, and not enough VOIP. We think that most short-term, fractal entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSL. Our feature set is second to none, but our killer best-of-breed, ubiquitous user communities and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think that most bleeding-edge web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough AJAX. We will augment our aptitude to engineer without diminishing our capacity to extend. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our infrastructures but our ability to whiteboard. We will exploit the capability of interfaces to strategize. We will incentivize the power of web-readiness to envisioneer. If you target dynamically, you may have to repurpose globally.