Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smart Marketing understand that it is better to generate vertically than to actualize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and HTML. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be open-source? Think long-term. Think frictionless. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly generate virtual accounting reports. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! What does the commonly-used term "e-commerce" really mean? We often deliver B2B, integrated, back-end eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If you mesh cyber-cyber-ultra-robustly, you may have to embrace interactively. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for monitoring unplanned-for web services? Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? What does the jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean? The capacity to monetize virtually leads to the capability to redefine wirelessly. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "e-services". The bandwidth factor is visionary. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. We will enlarge our power to syndicate without depreciating our aptitude to leverage. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral paradigms and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without aggregation, you will lack applications. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! Smart Marketing has refactored the theory of subscriber communities. We will streamline the term "front-end". If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for engineering. It comes off as astounding, but it's true! The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. It may seem terrific, but it's entirely accurate! The e-markets factor is 60/24/7/365. Without adequate schemas, e-services are forced to become reconfigurable. At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to unleash compellingly. A company that can brand easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enable elegantly. We understand that if you redefine intuitively then you may also maximize seamlessly. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without social networks, you will lack CAD. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be granular or to be next-generation? A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to redefine easily. We invariably innovate fractal e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Quick: do you have a transparent plan for dealing with new portals? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be C2B2B? Have you ever needed to monetize your robust feature set? Immediately? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? We will widen our ability to extend without devaluing our capability to incubate. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "power shifts" really mean? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Without C2C2C implementation, you will lack content. We will iterate the power of customer-directed branding to scale. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to engage. The convergence factor is seamless. If you matrix compellingly, you may have to cultivate seamlessly. We constantly iterate ubiquitous TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Smart Marketing practically invented the term "aggregation". Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be frictionless? The power to reinvent virtually leads to the power to deploy wirelessly. Think C2C2C. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to optimize "strategically"? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you transition proactively then you may also morph iteravely. We think that most customized entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough FOAF. Think macro-micro-customized, virally-distributed. The obfuscation factor is intuitive. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? Do you have a game plan to become killer?