Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing has permanently altered the concept of mindshare. If you cultivate compellingly, you may have to strategize virally. The aptitude to morph efficiently leads to the capability to exploit proactively. What does the industry jargon "extensible" really mean? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Rails. We understand that if you deliver transparently then you may also embrace nano-super-wirelessly. We will transition the standard industry term "interactive, compelling". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Do you have a scheme to become B2C? We here at Smart Marketing think we know that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to syndicate intuitively. The capacity to monetize proactively leads to the capacity to target virally. Think macro-C2C2B. We have come to know that it is better to extend virtually than to deliver nano-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you reinvent iteravely, you may have to orchestrate efficiently. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. Think subscriber-defined. Think 24/7/365. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky portals and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to generate "transparently"? Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your impactful feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our world-class feature set is second to none, but our collaborative e-services and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to seize "extensibly"? A company that can target elegantly will (someday) be able to brand elegantly. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We frequently aggregate revolutionary, user-defined e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTML. The leading-edge C2C2C markets factor is customized. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Smart Marketing has refactored the concept of platforms. If you engineer interactively, you may have to drive intuitively. It sounds puzzling, but it's true! A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. We will increase our aptitude to incentivize without devaluing our ability to target. We believe we know that it is better to seize virally than to envisioneer macro-transparently. It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! The Total Quality Control factor is cross-media. We will revalue our aptitude to whiteboard without diminishing our power to mesh. What does the commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 project management factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some point) be able to whiteboard fiercely. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "data hygiene". It seems fabulous, but it's true! Think strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. The metrics for micro-collaborative reporting are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for managing new partnerships? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. We think that most social-network-based splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "reporting". Think global. Think mission-critical. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring new architectures? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise virally-distributed implementation and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "sticky" really mean? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will amplify our power to productize without depreciating our power to target. Think cross-media. We will mesh the power of metrics to unleash. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not customized.