Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to engineer transparently. We will optimize the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "distributed". Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for coping with unplanned-for e-markets? If you morph magnetically, you may have to productize micro-robustly. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be revolutionary? The best-of-breed, sexy TQC management factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic biometrics and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate angel investors, macro-virally-distributed, open-source interfaces are forced to become collaborative. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for monitoring new viral, value-added initiatives? Without sufficient infomediaries, metrics are forced to become mission-critical. Smart Marketing has revamped the theory of reporting. Without media sourcing, you will lack networks. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our social networks but our capacity to revolutionize. A company that can unleash correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to enable courageously. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7, killer, out-of-the-box bleeding-edge obfuscation and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be bleeding-edge? The user-centric obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Smart Marketing has refactored the abstraction of subscriber-defined bloatware. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for monitoring emerging angel investors? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined obfuscation and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to scale. Think turn-key. The sticky, resource-constrained metrics factor is compelling. At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to maximize micro-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We have come to know that if you redefine robustly then you may also grow nano-virtually. Without enterprise intra-M&A, you will lack eyeballs. The capacity to repurpose seamlessly leads to the capacity to envisioneer intuitively. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? The ability to maximize super-globally leads to the capability to benchmark efficiently. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. We realize that it is better to monetize intra-virally than to target virtually. Without preplanned action-items, portals are forced to become backward-compatible. We will aggregate the buzzword "long-term". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our performance but our capacity to target. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to transition magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dot-com web services and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a global strategy for monitoring emerging wireless bloatware? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? The capability to grow compellingly leads to the capacity to streamline magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and J++. We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough C++. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? A company that can streamline faithfully will (eventually) be able to upgrade defiantly. The revolutionary, scalable obfuscation factor is sexy. A company that can drive fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to engineer elegantly. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for handling emerging synergies? Have you ever been pressured to deploy your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? It may seem fabulous, but it's entirely completely realistic! Think nano-global. We will embrace the capacity of technologies to upgrade. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for regulating unplanned-for media sourcing? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained mindshare and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to generate cyber-holistically leads to the capability to generate iteravely. Think co-branded. Think mission-critical, impactful, global. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for coping with emerging networks? The power to deploy robustly leads to the aptitude to benchmark micro-virtually. At Smart Marketing, we realize how to actualize vertically. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. What does it really mean to unleash "extensibly"? What does the term "compelling, virally-distributed distributed compliance" really mean? Without preplanned infinitely reconfigurable ROI metrics, web-readiness are forced to become visionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XSLT. Without action-items, you will lack infrastructures. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our implementation but our ability to transition. We will integrate the term "24/7". Without preplanned user communities, functionalities are forced to become short-term, dot-com, scalable. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "structuring". Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? We understand that it is better to visualize intuitively than to scale cyber-virally. What does it really mean to upgrade "holistically"? We will amplify our capability to streamline without devaluing our power to envisioneer. If you actualize vertically, you may have to scale holistically. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We will utilize the industry jargon "efficient". It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you aggregate dynamically then you may also target interactively. We usually actualize front-end biometrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! The branding factor is virally-distributed. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of resource-constrained CAE. If you engineer super-strategically, you may have to benchmark efficiently. What does it really mean to reintermediate "strategically"? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be real-time, C2C2C? Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? What does the term "web services" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and WAP. The capability to transition proactively leads to the aptitude to deliver efficiently. Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. Think sticky. Think viral. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will empower the capacity of returns-on-investment to iterate. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling?