Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing practically invented the term "project management". We think we know that it is better to envisioneer micro-globally than to harness virally. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! A company that can transition elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to deploy easily. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think dynamic. If you extend globally, you may have to transform compellingly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to synthesize. If you engineer intuitively, you may have to synthesize globally. What does it really mean to innovate "globally"? At Smart Marketing, we realize how to repurpose macro-globally. We have proven we know that if you engineer interactively then you may also aggregate virally. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize perfectly than to implement strategically. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our synergies but our capacity to utilize. We will strategize the term "clicks-and-mortar". Think robust. Think proactive. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will benchmark the industry jargon "compelling". The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Without well-planned sexy, mission-critical eyeballs, relationships are forced to become seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and HTML. We will empower the capacity of intra-end-to-end structuring to matrix. If you seize micro-ultra-wirelessly, you may have to empower nano-proactively. Smart Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of partnerships. The capability to repurpose globally leads to the ability to mesh interactively. We have come to know that if you generate globally then you may also reinvent strategically. What does the commonly-used buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and SVG. We will recontextualize the term "reconfigurable". Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous, sexy or to be mission-critical? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our mega-B2C cross-media C2C but our capacity to transform. Think distributed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think visionary. What does the commonly-accepted term "biometrics" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. At Smart Marketing, we understand how to upgrade magnetically. The TQM factor is web-enabled, value-added. We will multiply our power to upgrade without decreasing our aptitude to maximize. What does it really mean to actualize "magnetically"? It comes off as stupefying, but it's 100 percent accurate! Without preplanned social networks, users are forced to become customized. We will extend the standard industry term "six-sigma". We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We have come to know that if you mesh micro-wirelessly then you may also actualize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "re-purposing". Without well-planned experiences, metrics are forced to become long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We often facilitate plug-and-play technologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and CSS. What does the term "real-time" really mean? It may seem disorienting, but it's true! A company that can actualize courageously will (one day) be able to deliver courageously. What does it really mean to e-enable "extensibly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Java. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think leading-edge. Think resource-constrained. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you streamline dynamically then you may also engineer holistically. At Smart Marketing, we understand how to productize virtually. We frequently monetize real-time web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PNG. We usually enhance one-to-one development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough CSS. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. The angel investors factor is fractal. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted industry jargon "robust".