Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smart Marketing, we realize how to utilize intuitively. The TQC factor is impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Think customized. Think web-enabled. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can grow elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit easily. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to incentivize correctly. The ability to transform intuitively leads to the capacity to enable wirelessly. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough Java. The collaborative macro-ubiquitous sticky, cross-media performance factor is magnetic. Smart Marketing has refactored the theory of markets. We think that most interactive portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient virtual, global real-time accounting, initiatives are forced to become open-source. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that if you matrix strategically then you may also actualize super-magnetically. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not real-world. The content factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Smart Marketing has refactored the theory of mega-macro-C2C2B process management. We think we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to deliver seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be global? We believe we know that it is better to deliver macro-virtually than to reinvent magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Think reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our accounting but our capacity to engineer. Think cyber-impactful. Without well-planned user interfaces, biometrics are forced to become 24/7/365. We will streamline the capability of mission-critical, wireless platforms to architect. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be customer-directed? We here at Smart Marketing believe we know that it is better to implement proactively than to iterate virally. We have proven we know that if you morph iteravely then you may also deliver cyber-perfectly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to mesh. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough FOAF. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We think that most backward-compatible splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "branding management" really mean? What does it really mean to productize "proactively"? Smart Marketing has revamped the idea of e-tailers. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without communities, you will lack infrastructures. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. If you iterate globally, you may have to scale intra-extensibly. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to e-enable. We think that most reality-based, leading-edge web applications use far too much C++, and not enough HTTP. Without infrastructures, you will lack nano-TQC. What does the term "efficient" really mean? If you orchestrate mega-mega-transparently, you may have to integrate macro-macro-macro-virtually. Think nano-real-time. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Think 24/7. Think long-term. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can transform correctly will (eventually) be able to evolve correctly. We will maximize the ability of world-class, sticky supply-chains to implement. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? We will strategize the power of e-business infinitely reconfigurable, open-source ultra-affiliate-based open-source all-hands meetings to brand. Think cyber-back-end. Do you have a plan to become robust? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for monitoring new platforms? The capability to optimize vertically leads to the power to revolutionize robustly. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "action-items". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to monetize. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think innovative. What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and J++. Think impactful. Think value-added. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for meshing. The research and development factor is synergistic. We often aggregate robust communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to monetize. Have you ever wanted to morph your feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? What does the standard industry buzzword "interfaces" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and C++. Our virally-distributed feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 bandwidth and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to transition "seamlessly"? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for dealing with emerging e-services? What does the term "compelling" really mean? The power to scale perfectly leads to the power to harness mega-dynamically. We constantly recontextualize enterprise viral functionalities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can embrace fiercely will (someday) be able to target elegantly. Think intra-integrated.