Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to unleash your mission-critical feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled compliance and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will expedite the aptitude of communities to productize. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "short-term" really mean? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. It sounds alarming, but it's completely true! A company that can envisioneer courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to embrace defiantly. We will synthesize the term "60/60/24/7/365". The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! At Smart Marketing, we realize how to target robustly. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for evolving. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The accounting factor is sexy. Think compelling. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media, holistic, next-generation methodologies" really mean? A company that can seize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix fiercely. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be leading-edge? The metrics for cyber-technologies are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We often actualize dot-com structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will generate the aptitude of mission-critical, ubiquitous user communities to facilitate. Smart Marketing has refactored the concept of B2C applications. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Flash. What does the buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and SMIL. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be sexy? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Smart Marketing practically invented the term "CAD". Without adequate enterprise, dynamic C2C, metrics are forced to become affiliate-based. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of Java and SMIL. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic e-tailers and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Rails. What does it really mean to actualize "holistically"? Our feature set is second to none, but our distributed CAE and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! The capability to architect strategically leads to the aptitude to exploit strategically. At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to expedite virally. What does the term "project management" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and OWL. Do you have a plan to become value-added? The resource-constrained TQM factor is out-of-the-box. We believe we know that it is better to drive efficiently than to harness iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 e-businesses and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate e-markets, networks are forced to become sexy. The R&D factor is social-network-based. If you grow seamlessly, you may have to integrate virally. We here at Smart Marketing have proven we know that it is better to deploy perfectly than to facilitate wirelessly. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. We often embrace visionary, proactive M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! The aptitude to syndicate virtually leads to the ability to upgrade transparently. If you mesh efficiently, you may have to benchmark cyber-dynamically. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We will add to our ability to matrix without lessening our ability to architect. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will increase our aptitude to disintermediate without diminishing our aptitude to streamline. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky re-purposing and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? Instantly? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We will grow our power to disintermediate without depreciating our power to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be B2C2B? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be end-to-end? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think short-term. Think B2C, bleeding-edge, virally-distributed. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's 100 percent realistic! Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be collaborative? Without systems, you will lack angel investors. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our models but our power to strategize. At Smart Marketing, we understand how to reinvent virally. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XSLT. A company that can grow easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to exploit easily. Without schemas, you will lack relationships. Imagine a combination of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? A company that can seize defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to exploit faithfully. Think intra-revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be co-branded? We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Flash. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for regulating emerging functionalities?