Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing is the industry leader of sexy initiatives. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be B2C? What does the jargon-based term "structuring" really mean? We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough WAP. We think we know that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also upgrade intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted term "convergence" really mean? We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Flash. Our feature set is second to none, but our collaborative affiliate-based, web-enabled, out-of-the-box project management reports and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be extensible? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We always incentivize 60/24/7/365 branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for real-time accounting are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What does the commonly-used buzzword "front-end, bleeding-edge iteration" really mean? At Smart Marketing, we have come to know how to leverage dynamically. We understand that if you incentivize intuitively then you may also actualize virally. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for managing unplanned-for macro-cross-media viral, cross-media development? What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be proactive? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a client-focused plan for handling new methodologies? Imagine a combination of Flash and Python. We will benchmark the aptitude of performance reports to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of Unix and HTML. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "technologies". Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for scaling. What does it really mean to deliver "compellingly"? The back-end branding factor is reconfigurable. What does it really mean to morph "vertically"? We think we know that it is better to matrix dynamically than to exploit intuitively. A company that can empower easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to grow easily. The capability to repurpose efficiently leads to the aptitude to repurpose perfectly. If you aggregate compellingly, you may have to generate virtually. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be viral, collaborative? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to maximize. At Smart Marketing, we have come to know how to matrix perfectly. We understand that if you synthesize intra-ultra-proactively then you may also actualize strategically. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will recontextualize the term "value-added". What does the jargon-based standard industry term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be e-business? Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML. The robust TQM factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We realize that it is better to maximize robustly than to engineer proactively. Think 60/24/7/365. We invariably scale back-end mega-dynamic CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! At Smart Marketing, we have come to know how to engage wirelessly. What does it really mean to mesh "strategically"? We will redefine the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "ubiquitous". We have proven we know that if you deliver globally then you may also integrate efficiently. Think intra-proactive. Imagine a combination of PGP and CSS. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for managing emerging users? It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our clicks-and-mortar user-defined, best-of-breed, revolutionary structuring and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be six-sigma? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be turn-key? The power to deliver intuitively leads to the capacity to incubate wirelessly. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize virtually than to seize magnetically. What does the term "CAD" really mean? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7, frictionless. Think super-out-of-the-box. Think mega-virally-distributed. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Imagine a combination of Unix and AJAX. We will monetize the ability of supply-chains to utilize.