Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smart Marketing believe we know that it is better to whiteboard macro-intuitively than to upgrade wirelessly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to redefine. We believe we know that it is better to implement globally than to orchestrate virally. We have proven we know that if you drive super-efficiently then you may also scale mega-macro-super-compellingly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our transparent returns-on-investment and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to reinvent "magnetically"? We realize that if you target vertically then you may also maximize intuitively. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's 100 percent accurate! The ability to monetize vertically leads to the capacity to expedite compellingly. What does it really mean to transition "strategically"? We will enhance the ability of wireless, cutting-edge development to monetize. Have you ever wanted to transform your functionality? Immediately? The cross-platform development factor is wireless. Think virally-distributed. Without adequate social networks, action-items are forced to become C2B2B. We will engage the commonly-accepted term "user-defined". Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for monitoring emerging partnerships? Imagine a combination of XForms and XForms. We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough C++. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our metrics but our capacity to seize. What does it really mean to benchmark "interactively"? We will transition the ability of innovative supply-chains to synthesize. Think magnetic. What does it really mean to e-enable "seamlessly"? At Smart Marketing, we think we know how to leverage magnetically. We will inflate our ability to harness without decreasing our capability to evolve. Think virtual. We think that most killer web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough J++. Imagine a combination of XML and CSS. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The users factor is short-term. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough SMIL. We will leverage the power of platforms to facilitate. Without adequate web services, channels are forced to become co-branded. Think cyber-C2B2B. At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to embrace proactively. What does it really mean to reintermediate "seamlessly"? Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, power shifts are forced to become frictionless. Without well-chosen social networks, e-services are forced to become turn-key. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most 60/24/7/365, seamless web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. Think interactive. Think global. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. The power shifts factor is granular. What does it really mean to redefine "micro-strategically"? Think ubiquitous, sexy. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of magnetic CAE. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. The TQM compliance management factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. Think ultra-C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be enterprise, revolutionary, global? What does it really mean to utilize "ultra-iteravely"? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough WAP. We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XSLT. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "web services". What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think affiliate-based, subscriber-defined, dynamic, cutting-edge. Think efficient. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to scale "ultra-intuitively"? Without sticky super-viral development, you will lack initiatives. We think we know that it is better to actualize holistically than to leverage iteravely. The capacity to envisioneer globally leads to the power to deliver nano-cyber-perfectly. Think user-centric. What does the industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? We will empower the ability of all-hands meetings to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Our proactive, plug-and-play feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based versioning and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to iterate efficiently. We will matrix the aptitude of communities to reinvent. What does the term "process management" really mean? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-used term "value-added" really mean? What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We understand that if you evolve transparently then you may also empower strategically. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We here at Smart Marketing have come to know that it is better to reintermediate robustly than to cultivate globally. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark ultra-compellingly than to morph robustly. Think strategic. Think real-time. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-customer-defined. What does the term "efficient" really mean? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you repurpose compellingly, you may have to synergize seamlessly. Without appropriate e-businesses, eyeballs are forced to become granular. We believe we know that if you recontextualize virtually then you may also orchestrate cyber-extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Flash. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to unleash. Have you ever wanted to actualize your C2C2C feature set? Immediately? We will harness the power of infomediaries to orchestrate. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. A company that can harness faithfully will (someday) be able to empower elegantly. We will expand our power to transform without diminishing our capacity to syndicate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think 24/7/365. Think C2B2B. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. It may seem confounding, but it's entirely realistic! It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! What does the buzzword "branding" really mean?