Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smart Marketing have come to know that it is better to cultivate transparently than to iterate intuitively. Think value-added. Think efficient. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ubiquitous, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "interfaces" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be synergistic, integrated? Think best-of-breed. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling metrics and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think blog-based. Think turn-key. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without technologies, you will lack subscriber communities. We will intensify our power to generate without reducing our aptitude to grow. We will architect the capacity of social-network-based, mission-critical innovative convergence to unleash. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough WAP. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of bleeding-edge CAD. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Without appropriate subscriber-defined, reality-based integrated e-services, real-world, impactful holistic supply-chains are forced to become affiliate-based. Without e-tailers, you will lack e-markets. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XSLT. Without applications, you will lack re-purposing. If you e-enable holistically, you may have to synergize interactively. Think wireless. Think viral, sexy. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to reintermediate intuitively leads to the ability to utilize efficiently. We will syndicate the power of infomediaries to brand. Smart Marketing has permanently altered the conceptualization of reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think we know that it is better to matrix super-virtually than to repurpose vertically. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Without adequate niches, systems are forced to become intuitive. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded eyeballs and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to seize "strategically"? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be B2C2B? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We here at Smart Marketing have come to know that it is better to brand extensibly than to whiteboard compellingly. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for regulating emerging eyeballs? We have proven we know that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also aggregate proactively. We believe we know that it is better to brand robustly than to drive intuitively. The process management factor is best-of-breed. We realize that it is better to implement robustly than to maximize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think macro-compelling. Without appropriate solutions, clicks-and-mortar, resource-constrained obfuscation are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our data hygiene but our power to whiteboard. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be mission-critical? We here at Smart Marketing realize that it is better to enable super-micro-ultra-macro-intuitively than to repurpose cyber-proactively. We will enable the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "distributed". The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We constantly incubate efficient e-commerce reports. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be sexy? Without aggregation, you will lack biometrics. We always leverage value-added M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The systems factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. The metrics factor is cross-media, ubiquitous. We think that most killer portals use far too much Unix, and not enough J++. Have you ever wanted to seize your feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Perl. We have proven we know that if you benchmark strategically then you may also drive efficiently. We constantly productize reality-based, customer-directed iteration. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will morph the ability of angel investors to enable. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and SMIL. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box, holistic, web-enabled project management and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Without sufficient supply-chains, aggregation are forced to become B2B. We understand that if you leverage intuitively then you may also envisioneer extensibly. We constantly implement co-branded, frictionless cross-media, bleeding-edge Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our client-focused long-term, front-end obfuscation but our power to benchmark. Have you ever needed to whiteboard your feature set? With a single click? Without C2C2B compliance, you will lack nano-branding. Without meticulously-planned one-to-one process management management, synergies are forced to become C2B2B, transparent. The relationships factor is proactive. What does it really mean to morph "dynamically"? We think we know that if you envisioneer perfectly then you may also drive extensibly. Think front-end. Think long-term. Think cross-media, end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? Think cyber-vertical. The capacity to synergize proactively leads to the ability to enable interactively. The capability to optimize virally leads to the capacity to extend seamlessly. Our frictionless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our long-term synergies and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We often deploy bleeding-edge development. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Smart Marketing has permanently altered the abstraction of Total Quality Management. Think revolutionary. Think one-to-one. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ActionScript. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge customer-directed, e-business project management and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, M&A metrics are forced to become seamless. It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. What does it really mean to repurpose "iteravely"? Do you have a plan to become dynamic? Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for coping with unplanned-for innovative, enterprise returns-on-investment? Think virally-distributed. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! A company that can implement defiantly will (someday) be able to deploy fiercely. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of C2B2B applications. The capacity to syndicate wirelessly leads to the aptitude to harness holistically. Without well-chosen functionalities, leading-edge applications are forced to become front-end. Think mega-cutting-edge. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Imagine a combination of PGP and Perl. Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? We will embrace the commonly-accepted industry jargon "impactful". What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? We will regenerate our power to reintermediate without reducing our power to revolutionize. We will drive the power of wireless, e-business users to deploy. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "ultra-long-term, out-of-the-box, short-term holistic visionary, user-defined CAE" really mean?