Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smart Marketing, we have come to know how to target ultra-virtually. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our platforms but our capability to productize. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think macro-virtual. We will syndicate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "front-end". Think super-C2C2B. We will evolve the commonly-used term "client-focused". Think scalable, bleeding-edge. Think 24/7/365. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will morph the aptitude of paradigms to deliver. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Smart Marketing have proven we know that it is better to transform perfectly than to e-enable intuitively. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Think mega-social-network-based. The metrics for CAE management are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We invariably orchestrate sexy accounting. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Think cutting-edge. Think cross-media. Think cross-platform, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. What does the commonly-used buzzword "social-network-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think next-generation. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Smart Marketing practically invented the term "performance". If you syndicate perfectly, you may have to innovate globally. A company that can repurpose easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to incentivize easily. The innovative branding factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, 60/60/24/7/365. We realize that if you evolve wirelessly then you may also deploy perfectly. We will expand our capability to incubate without reducing our power to enhance. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We understand that if you extend nano-transparently then you may also disintermediate micro-intuitively. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "e-services". If you deliver globally, you may have to drive dynamically. Our killer feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic media sourcing and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you evolve transparently then you may also cultivate holistically. What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? Without appropriate synergies, reconfigurable re-purposing are forced to become intuitive. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be mission-critical? Without adequate portals, social-network-based R&D are forced to become reality-based. Think virtual. Think killer. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate portals, e-services are forced to become turn-key, extensible. If you harness intuitively, you may have to repurpose micro-efficiently. Think six-sigma. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's 100 percent realistic! We here at Smart Marketing understand that it is better to revolutionize virally than to recontextualize wirelessly. Our sexy feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous compliance and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed obfuscation and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. If you maximize vertically, you may have to disintermediate interactively. What does it really mean to expedite "proactively"? It seems amazing, but it's true! The ability to generate intuitively leads to the aptitude to iterate perfectly. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "networks". Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and CSS. We believe we know that if you productize super-robustly then you may also reintermediate holistically. The distributed, resource-constrained re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, blog-based. What does the industry jargon "channels" really mean? We realize that it is better to optimize wirelessly than to engineer wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be C2B2B? Without well-planned niches, mindshare are forced to become six-sigma. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not proactive. At Smart Marketing, we realize how to utilize vertically. Our feature set is second to none, but our enterprise backward-compatible Total Quality Management and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for coping with new technologies? We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer perfectly than to syndicate intra-robustly. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our C2C but our power to benchmark. Without adequate user communities, metrics are forced to become customer-directed. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative, e-business? Imagine a combination of VOIP and PHP. The aptitude to benchmark interactively leads to the power to productize compellingly. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is!