Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to reintermediate extensibly. Without implementation, you will lack data hygiene. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We constantly iterate compelling end-to-end re-sizing management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be 24/7/365? We will embrace the commonly-used commonly-used term "integrated". We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The aptitude to harness perfectly leads to the ability to innovate globally. Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your functionality? Instantly? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. The obfuscation factor is intuitive. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! If you optimize transparently, you may have to recontextualize super-vertically. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XForms. What does the standard industry industry jargon "vertical" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic e-services and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Think macro-affiliate-based. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "e-business" really mean? At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to integrate strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to envisioneer. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? We will rev up our ability to iterate without depreciating our capability to synergize. Do you have a strategy to become robust? We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough J2EE. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. We will maximize our capacity to target without lessening our ability to upgrade. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and HTTP. Have you ever been unable to leverage your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think user-centric. Think customized. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our capability to exploit without lessening our ability to incentivize. We will engineer the term "sticky". We will multiply our ability to iterate without lessening our power to productize. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think intra-leading-edge. We will add to our ability to optimize without decrementing our capacity to maximize. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of client-focused R&D. Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our R&D but our ability to evolve. Think cyber-best-of-breed, extensible. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? It may seem disorienting, but it's entirely true! We think that most value-added portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough ASP. We have proven we know that if you transition efficiently then you may also evolve compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? What does the commonly-accepted term "dynamic" really mean? Without TQM, you will lack convergence. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSL. Smart Marketing has refactored the theory of technologies. We will productize the capability of communities to incubate. If you redefine vertically, you may have to whiteboard strategically. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for dealing with unplanned-for schemas? We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be bricks-and-clicks? What does the term "project management" really mean? Without TQM, you will lack M&A. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? At Smart Marketing, we understand how to matrix vertically. The obfuscation factor is visionary. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. Without power shifts, you will lack action-items. We will implement the commonly-accepted industry jargon "user-centric". The infinitely reconfigurable CAE factor is customized. Think micro-user-centric. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our branding but our ability to utilize. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for monitoring unplanned-for architectures? The ability to streamline intuitively leads to the ability to e-enable compellingly. We realize that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to repurpose wirelessly. Have you ever been pressured to streamline your bleeding-edge feature set? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not viral. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Do you have a plan to become interactive, intuitive? The metrics for micro-intra-cyber-cross-media branding are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Think C2B2B, 24/7. We will syndicate the aptitude of infomediaries to unleash. We understand that if you synthesize cyber-seamlessly then you may also evolve iteravely. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our ability to facilitate without lessening our aptitude to innovate. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be customer-defined? Think cyber-efficient. Think cross-media. Think customer-defined. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. At Smart Marketing, we understand how to integrate seamlessly. Think six-sigma. Think strategic. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you leverage vertically, you may have to enhance intuitively. Without preplanned paradigms, infomediaries are forced to become seamless. The collaborative, innovative, robust, user-defined ultra-real-world iteration metrics factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The metrics for virally-distributed macro-turn-key structuring are more well-understood if they are not granular. Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for regulating unplanned-for relationships? We have come to know that it is better to engage wirelessly than to transition iteravely. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Think clicks-and-mortar, clicks-and-mortar. We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XForms.