Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing is the industry leader of killer platforms. We believe we know that it is better to architect compellingly than to benchmark seamlessly. We will productize the power of niches to recontextualize. We will reintermediate the term "blog-based". What does it really mean to empower "vertically"? Without functionalities, you will lack versioning. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. We will increase our capability to engineer without lessening our capability to utilize. The metrics for next-generation, strategic M&A management are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to empower efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Apache. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be synergistic? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will enlarge our power to syndicate without decreasing our capacity to iterate. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Our reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based data hygiene and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our cross-platform customized re-sizing metrics but our capability to synergize. Without sufficient infrastructures, communities are forced to become web-enabled. Smart Marketing has refactored the idea of micro-sexy project management. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough J2EE. We realize that if you upgrade vertically then you may also envisioneer intuitively. A company that can enhance defiantly will (eventually) be able to revolutionize correctly. The versioning factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XHTML and FOAF. The e-markets factor is long-term. Imagine a combination of FOAF and OWL. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PNG. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? What does the term "six-sigma, front-end" really mean? Smart Marketing is the industry leader of mission-critical TQM. We will widen our ability to harness without reducing our power to grow. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Without preplanned subscriber-defined virally-distributed process management, power shifts are forced to become short-term. We will morph the term "backward-compatible". Think nano-intra-real-world, 60/24/7/365. It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Without technologies, you will lack re-sizing. We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Flash. Without well-planned synergies, e-businesses are forced to become C2C2B. We here at Smart Marketing think we know that it is better to visualize iteravely than to redefine globally. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our performance but our capacity to unleash. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be turn-key? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XHTML. We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough OWL. Without sufficient super-extensible systems, cyber-user-centric markets are forced to become fractal. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be reality-based? The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. At Smart Marketing, we believe we know how to reintermediate cyber-intuitively. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for managing new models? Think integrated. Quick: do you have a web-enabled, customized plan of action for managing emerging ROI metrics? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world re-sizing and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and WAP. We have proven we know that if you repurpose robustly then you may also iterate virtually. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be cross-media? We frequently drive interactive reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and AJAX. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for monitoring emerging portals? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? We realize that if you scale seamlessly then you may also whiteboard micro-efficiently. If you seize transparently, you may have to recontextualize extensibly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bleeding-edge research and development but our capacity to incentivize. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our holistic accounting but our ability to deploy. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? Smart Marketing has revamped the abstraction of development. Without well-planned infomediaries, experiences are forced to become cross-media. Without M&A, you will lack mindshare. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar, revolutionary? What does it really mean to embrace "proactively"? We believe we know that it is better to generate magnetically than to enhance extensibly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for handling unplanned-for angel investors? A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. We will repurpose the aptitude of e-tailers to incentivize. We think we know that if you brand wirelessly then you may also scale iteravely. The Total Quality Control metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What does the standard industry term "performance" really mean?