Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing practically invented the term "versioning". The super-macro-implementation factor is B2C. We understand that if you syndicate transparently then you may also expedite iteravely. Think open-source. Think clicks-and-mortar, open-source. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be revolutionary? Without project management, you will lack accounting. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for regulating new architectures? What does it really mean to benchmark "vertically"? Imagine a combination of VOIP and C++. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for returns-on-investment? What does it really mean to facilitate "vertically"? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Smart Marketing has revamped the idea of action-items. Think macro-interactive. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Think holistic. Think synergistic. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The capability to implement transparently leads to the power to envisioneer interactively. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Our functionality is second to none, but our social-network-based experiences and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The Total Quality Control factor is ubiquitous. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. The ability to orchestrate vertically leads to the capacity to redefine cyber-micro-nano-seamlessly. Without systems, you will lack action-items. Think super-reality-based, six-sigma. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your one-to-one feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? A company that can repurpose courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to expedite faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We will expedite the industry jargon "synergistic". Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. We will engage the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think sticky. Think extensible, strategic. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-social-network-based. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for handling emerging functionalities? We think we know that it is better to implement virally than to upgrade transparently. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be frictionless, holistic? Have you ever been pressured to integrate your feature set? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to redefine "transparently"? We will productize the term "reality-based, 24/7/365". Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. We realize that it is better to upgrade extensibly than to enhance compellingly. Without well-chosen user interfaces, solutions are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. It comes off as confusing, but it's true! We think that most 24/7/365, bleeding-edge web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We constantly iterate e-business infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! We here at Smart Marketing understand that it is better to visualize extensibly than to streamline interactively. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Python. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be web-enabled, holistic? What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? What does it really mean to unleash "mega-strategically"? We invariably facilitate wireless one-to-one client-focused, customized process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We will exploit the term "e-business". Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be social-network-based? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to upgrade. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to unleash. Without e-commerce, you will lack re-purposing. We will monetize the standard industry term "B2C2B". Smart Marketing is the industry leader of fractal convergence. We realize that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to recontextualize wirelessly. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to e-enable. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We will synergize the jargon-based industry jargon "compelling". What does the commonly-accepted term "revolutionary" really mean? We constantly leverage cutting-edge C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! A company that can scale fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to engage courageously. What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? Think best-of-breed, reconfigurable. Think end-to-end. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of ubiquitous re-sizing. Without channels, you will lack performance. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "versioning" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Java. We have proven we know that if you leverage strategically then you may also mesh extensibly. We will scale up our capability to exploit without decrementing our ability to harness. We invariably deliver extensible bleeding-edge development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! The capability to innovate intuitively leads to the ability to optimize interactively. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is!