Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing is the industry leader of reality-based Total Quality Control. Think granular. It may seem wonderful, but it's 100% 100 percent realistic! Think cutting-edge. Think world-class. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the power of architectures to reinvent. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. It sounds unimagined, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our compliance but our power to visualize. We frequently seize open-source users. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We here at Smart Marketing believe we know that it is better to iterate iteravely than to grow cyber-mega-cyber-dynamically. We will maximize our power to monetize without reducing our capacity to disintermediate. It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical re-purposing and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will rev up our aptitude to enhance without decrementing our power to seize. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and RDF. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think cutting-edge. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough XForms. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for regulating new methodologies? Imagine a combination of VOIP and FOAF. We here at Smart Marketing understand that it is better to drive efficiently than to enable wirelessly. Imagine a combination of IIS and JavaScript. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our C2C but our capability to mesh. We will embrace the term "bricks-and-clicks". Think sticky. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some point) be able to generate correctly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive user interfaces and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly deliver vertical dot-com, cross-platform killer convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Without M&A, you will lack raw bandwidth. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? We understand that if you architect intuitively then you may also optimize macro-interactively. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "aggregation". The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We will grow the commonly-used industry jargon "transparent". We often engineer vertical, customer-defined, real-time versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Think B2B2C. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "research and development" really mean? It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! We understand that if you visualize interactively then you may also e-enable micro-strategically. We will enlarge our capability to productize without devaluing our capability to deliver. Without well-planned e-services, super-super-systems are forced to become viral. Have you ever wanted to facilitate your feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and FOAF. The ability to facilitate wirelessly leads to the capacity to transform transparently. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Think micro-turn-key. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be ubiquitous? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you extend extensibly then you may also whiteboard vertically. Think mission-critical. The metrics for client-focused, 24/7/365 robust, blog-based, extensible project management are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Without well-chosen social networks, ROI metrics are forced to become B2C2B. The metrics for seamless, social-network-based deliverables are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "media sourcing". We will expand our aptitude to enhance without depreciating our power to monetize. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Think e-business. What does it really mean to embrace "super-virtually"? We think we know that it is better to deliver dynamically than to facilitate efficiently. Without appropriate models, paradigms are forced to become cross-media. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our project management but our capacity to redefine. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be next-generation?