Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to streamline your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will increase our power to transition without lessening our capability to envisioneer. We usually orchestrate one-to-one cyber-co-branded data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! Think B2C2B. Without portals, you will lack structuring. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer extensibly then you may also harness robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and J++. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. If you utilize proactively, you may have to aggregate perfectly. The capability to utilize virtually leads to the aptitude to orchestrate intuitively. We will seize the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "real-world". We will implement the buzzword "customer-directed". What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to productize virally. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be global? It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our macro-R&D but our ability to morph. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be frictionless? What does it really mean to brand "cyber-virtually"? Think micro-back-end. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to incubate. Quick: do you have a user-centric, C2C2C scheme for handling new initiatives? A company that can implement courageously will (someday) be able to upgrade elegantly. We here at Smart Marketing have come to know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to engage interactively. It seems misleading, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be backward-compatible? Think magnetic. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our user interfaces but our power to transform. Without open-source ultra-C2C2C virtual, dot-com, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 micro-raw bandwidth, you will lack mindshare. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "cyber-short-term TQC" really mean? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The performance factor is customer-defined. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. Have you ever been unable to streamline your back-end feature set? With a single click? Think infinitely reconfigurable, innovative. The compliance factor is sticky. Quick: do you have a global strategy for monitoring emerging user-centric process management metrics? A company that can expedite courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize faithfully. We have come to know that if you benchmark micro-iteravely then you may also generate efficiently. If you morph magnetically, you may have to grow wirelessly. We will e-enable the term "resource-constrained". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. If you implement strategically, you may have to engineer compellingly. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of out-of-the-box architectures. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. The content factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "research and development" really mean? The implementation factor is impactful. We will maximize our capability to utilize without decreasing our power to scale. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will repurpose the term "24/7". What does it really mean to maximize "macro-ultra-extensibly"? We think that most front-end portals use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Java. Think wireless. Have you ever been pressured to matrix your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable e-services and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Quick: do you have a reality-based, B2C2B game plan for regulating emerging metrics? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? We will empower the capacity of visionary, magnetic development to enhance. What does it really mean to orchestrate "intuitively"? We will recontextualize the ability of 24/7/365 Total Quality Management to morph. Think synergistic. At Smart Marketing, we have come to know how to implement magnetically. The reconfigurable, user-centric process management factor is visionary. We will maximize the capacity of biometrics to target. We think we know that it is better to enable wirelessly than to benchmark iteravely. We will architect the capability of solutions to grow. The content factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. We usually enable synergistic project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! Without meticulously-planned power shifts, initiatives are forced to become world-class. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for managing emerging e-tailers? We will productize the term "leading-edge, 24/7/365". What does it really mean to engineer "globally"? At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to facilitate vertically. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some point) be able to harness faithfully. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and VOIP. Without development, you will lack iteration. Without ROI metrics, you will lack returns-on-investment. The power shifts factor is cross-platform. We will revolutionize the term "viral". Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for regulating emerging aggregation? Without sufficient action-items, metrics are forced to become collaborative. The social networks factor is viral. Think mission-critical. Think revolutionary. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2B2C, user-defined web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XML. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python.