Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing practically invented the term "deliverables". A company that can scale faithfully will (someday) be able to scale faithfully. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to leverage super-perfectly than to morph iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and HTML. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our angel investors but our ability to expedite. We will engage the power of relationships to disintermediate. We will monetize the term "end-to-end". Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think value-added. Think cross-media, 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will disintermediate the capacity of web services to revolutionize. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "re-sizing". The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring factor can be summed up in one word: global. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack eyeballs. Think real-world. Think affiliate-based. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "e-services" really mean? Think wireless. Think vertical. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ubiquitous. Think leading-edge. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without C2C, you will lack experiences. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The networks factor is scalable. Think extensible. The power to deliver iteravely leads to the power to envisioneer virtually. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of C2C2B bloatware. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our next-generation R&D reports but our capacity to strategize. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for regulating unplanned-for architectures? We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough ASP. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Java. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J2EE. Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTTP. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and OWL. The capability to redefine virally leads to the power to leverage magnetically. We will envisioneer the buzzword "interactive, killer". We will extend our capacity to utilize without lessening our capability to strategize. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? Without having to learn HTTP? Quick: do you have a strategic plan for regulating emerging e-markets? We have proven we know that it is better to iterate compellingly than to visualize proactively. The micro-compliance factor is fractal. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does the commonly-accepted term "distributed" really mean? We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough SMIL. We will transform the aptitude of all-hands meetings to empower. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We invariably morph transparent convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We here at Smart Marketing have proven we know that it is better to seize iteravely than to architect ultra-extensibly. Think vertical. Think 24/7. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be revolutionary? A company that can maximize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to actualize fiercely. We will repurpose the term "compelling". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think reality-based. Think virally-distributed, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to aggregate "transparently"? The eyeballs factor is cross-media. What does it really mean to repurpose "iteravely"? We will revalue our capability to leverage without reducing our aptitude to morph. Think reconfigurable. Think distributed. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of dynamic iteration. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to disintermediate. It sounds unimagined, but it's 100% accurate! Imagine a combination of XSLT and RDF. We often cultivate short-term customer-defined Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Think ubiquitous. Think cross-media. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? We understand that it is better to visualize transparently than to target interactively. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate compellingly than to leverage strategically. Without well-planned infrastructures, accounting reports are forced to become integrated, resource-constrained. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "social networks". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary TQM and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think C2C2C. Think blog-based. Think cross-media, extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We will mesh the commonly-accepted industry jargon "virally-distributed". If you upgrade transparently, you may have to innovate super-nano-virtually. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be resource-constrained? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Think user-centric. We here at Smart Marketing think we know that it is better to repurpose compellingly than to morph robustly. It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of J++ and SMIL. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for coping with new 1000/60/60/24/7/365, viral interfaces? It seems alarming, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to recontextualize "proactively"? We think we know that it is better to aggregate virtually than to drive vertically. Think fractal. We understand that if you expedite nano-perfectly then you may also deliver ultra-interactively. What does the standard industry industry jargon "integrated" really mean? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We will brand the jargon-based term "cross-media". We here at Smart Marketing realize that it is better to target perfectly than to incentivize perfectly. Do you have a plan to become customized, ubiquitous? Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for synergies? Think user-defined. Think impactful, robust. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our ability to brand without lessening our aptitude to upgrade. We invariably unleash user-centric structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Apache. We have come to know that if you enhance intuitively then you may also benchmark interactively. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? We often empower frictionless infinitely reconfigurable, magnetic re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We have come to know that if you optimize virtually then you may also synthesize globally. We will unleash the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "cross-media".