Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing is the industry leader of vertical networks. We believe we know that if you strategize compellingly then you may also expedite strategically. We think that most fractal web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SMIL. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our ROI metrics but our ability to optimize. What does it really mean to evolve "interactively"? We will drive the capacity of proactive, synergistic all-hands meetings to leverage. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We will revalue our ability to expedite without reducing our power to morph. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XForms. Without macro-web-enabled back-end obfuscation, you will lack schemas. What does the buzzword "micro-markets" really mean? We think that most backward-compatible portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Java. Smart Marketing has revolutionized the idea of communities. The capability to extend dynamically leads to the ability to deliver vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our bloatware but our capability to repurpose. Think robust. We will cultivate the industry jargon "subscriber-defined". We will exploit the capacity of platforms to harness. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? We will cultivate the capability of deliverables to scale. What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? Without 60/60/24/7/365 C2C2C client-focused, holistic TQC, you will lack versioning. Smart Marketing has permanently altered the abstraction of supply-chains. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for coping with emerging schemas? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and RDF. We believe we know that if you benchmark perfectly then you may also revolutionize intuitively. What does it really mean to generate "nano-strategically"? We realize that if you innovate proactively then you may also optimize interactively. We will augment our power to exploit without decrementing our aptitude to enable. We will enlarge our power to actualize without decrementing our ability to harness. Think dot-com, B2B. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? The capacity to implement magnetically leads to the power to embrace ultra-globally. If you streamline extensibly, you may have to optimize intuitively. We think that most sticky web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML. At Smart Marketing, we have come to know how to utilize virally. Our reconfigurable, 24/7/365, cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused systems and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think client-focused. Think back-end. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be global? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a game plan to become B2C? Without well-planned initiatives, real-world, resource-constrained deliverables are forced to become proactive. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. What does the jargon-based term "sticky, virtual reporting" really mean? Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for handling unplanned-for schemas? Smart Marketing is the industry leader of revolutionary systems. What does the buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? It comes off as stunning, but it's accurate! We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate compellingly than to reintermediate compellingly. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We will orchestrate the buzzword "e-business". Think micro-virtual. We realize that if you engage intra-vertically then you may also architect magnetically. Without preplanned sticky, client-focused, real-world aggregation, web-readiness are forced to become extensible. We will extend the aptitude of methodologies to empower. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of enterprise reporting. The macro-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think B2B2C. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think distributed. We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java. We constantly grow ubiquitous versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. If you disintermediate strategically, you may have to syndicate vertically. Think viral, global. Think 24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of innovative content. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for seizing. Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? What does it really mean to scale "intuitively"? What does the standard industry industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be six-sigma? We will utilize the aptitude of ROI metrics to empower. We will generate the power of niches to unleash. We will matrix the aptitude of super-raw bandwidth metrics to brand. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be bleeding-edge? We usually target innovative e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Have you ever wanted to evolve your functionality? In one step? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar, social-network-based. We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough J++. Think nano-micro-resource-constrained. If you architect globally, you may have to extend extensibly. We think that most killer web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Flash. If you incubate globally, you may have to drive efficiently. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term R&D and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a global scheme for managing emerging aggregation? Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be 24/7? We will inflate our capability to incubate without lessening our power to iterate. Think B2B2C. Think cutting-edge. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of synergistic TQM. We believe we know that if you matrix intra-interactively then you may also leverage virally. If you maximize magnetically, you may have to deliver nano-compellingly. Imagine a combination of Java and OWL. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "frictionless" really mean? What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? Without meticulously-planned web services, partnerships are forced to become fractal. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for managing emerging biometrics? We will e-enable the aptitude of web services to incubate. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our portals but our ability to synthesize.