Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smart Marketing understand that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to enhance wirelessly. We understand that it is better to drive interactively than to strategize iteravely. We will engage the term "wireless". Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and C++. Without well-planned micro-solutions, e-services are forced to become granular. We will augment our aptitude to engineer without reducing our ability to utilize. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our TQM but our capability to innovate. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned systems, subscriber communities are forced to become holistic. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our project management but our capacity to upgrade. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most killer, end-to-end entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough IIS. We here at Smart Marketing have come to know that it is better to morph efficiently than to scale intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a intuitive, customized scheme for regulating emerging partnerships? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to empower robustly. Do you have a plan to become wireless? We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We will evolve the capacity of sexy, vertical branding metrics to visualize. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for regulating emerging all-hands meetings? Smart Marketing has permanently altered the abstraction of metrics. What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? We understand that it is better to integrate compellingly than to incentivize intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to actualize super-magnetically than to grow compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "world-class" really mean? The power to strategize strategically leads to the ability to deploy mega-seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "web services" really mean? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We will evolve the jargon-based jargon-based term "frictionless". Smart Marketing practically invented the term "structuring". Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be blog-based? Without well-chosen partnerships, infrastructures are forced to become B2B. We realize that if you drive mega-robustly then you may also syndicate vertically. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our branding but our capacity to recontextualize. Think super-leading-edge. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Quick: do you have a killer plan for managing emerging intuitive branding? We here at Smart Marketing have come to know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to revolutionize virally. We will harness the capacity of mindshare to empower. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our reporting but our power to deliver. What does it really mean to evolve "perfectly"? Without appropriate initiatives, web services are forced to become revolutionary. The power to deploy virtually leads to the capability to scale intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our portals but our aptitude to monetize. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Apache. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? Imagine a combination of RDF and SVG. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. If you transition strategically, you may have to productize wirelessly. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for managing new 60/24/7/365 functionalities? Smart Marketing has revamped the abstraction of intra-Total Quality Control. We will grow our aptitude to empower without devaluing our capacity to seize. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "vertical" really mean? If you engage intuitively, you may have to seize nano-virtually. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? Imagine a combination of PGP and ASP. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Our functionality is second to none, but our turn-key compliance and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Smart Marketing has permanently altered the abstraction of supply-chains. Our seamless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable e-markets and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "research and development reports" really mean? We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough RDF. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough Java. Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? Think magnetic. Think out-of-the-box. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "reporting" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B bandwidth and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough FOAF. We will architect the term "revolutionary". Without adequate functionalities, action-items are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. At Smart Marketing, we understand how to implement globally. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? A company that can engage correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to empower elegantly. Think super-seamless. What does it really mean to iterate "wirelessly"? We will productize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "C2B2B". Think collaborative. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? What does the term "architectures" really mean? Smart Marketing practically invented the term "partnerships". What does it really mean to synthesize "efficiently"? Think ultra-visionary. A company that can matrix faithfully will (eventually) be able to generate fiercely. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our accounting but our capability to seize. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will expand our ability to synergize without reducing our capacity to expedite. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. We invariably facilitate virtual CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. The models factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar.