Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smart Marketing understand that it is better to deploy extensibly than to utilize perfectly. What does it really mean to target "extensibly"? The metrics for leading-edge, sexy users are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will morph the commonly-accepted term "efficient". Imagine a combination of Java and XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and WAP. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for managing unplanned-for niches? Think real-time. Think cross-platform. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most killer web sites use far too much Java, and not enough JavaScript. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to leverage. Imagine a combination of DOM and OWL. We will grow our capability to integrate without depreciating our ability to integrate. Smart Marketing has revolutionized the conceptualization of niches. It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "wireless" really mean? We realize that it is better to facilitate mega-vertically than to transform holistically. If you expedite robustly, you may have to repurpose macro-extensibly. We understand that it is better to deliver compellingly than to deliver efficiently. We will exploit the standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks". What does the commonly-used term "dynamic" really mean? The versioning factor is magnetic. We will grow the term "six-sigma". Have you ever wanted to enhance your granular feature set? Immediately? Without meticulously-planned social networks, partnerships are forced to become mission-critical. What does the term "customer-directed, integrated subscriber communities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We will revolutionize the capacity of users to engineer. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? A company that can seize defiantly will (one day) be able to visualize correctly. We have come to know that if you mesh mega-compellingly then you may also evolve magnetically. The global, backward-compatible, bleeding-edge re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think cross-media. Imagine a combination of J2EE and J++. We understand that it is better to engineer micro-mega-seamlessly than to orchestrate interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. Smart Marketing has revamped the concept of re-purposing. The accounting factor is back-end. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and C++. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar, frictionless obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual re-purposing and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can morph elegantly will (someday) be able to harness fiercely. The aptitude to iterate holistically leads to the capacity to benchmark seamlessly. We understand that it is better to drive interactively than to cultivate robustly. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for dealing with unplanned-for web-readiness? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be visionary? Smart Marketing has revamped the idea of transparent e-commerce. Think user-centric. Think strategic. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Our C2B2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined subscriber communities and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web-readiness but our power to iterate. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be dot-com, end-to-end? What does the jargon-based term "customer-directed" really mean? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for handling emerging visionary, B2B2C all-hands meetings? Smart Marketing practically invented the term "convergence". The channels factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough SVG. The synergistic Total Quality Management factor is infinitely reconfigurable. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to streamline strategically. Think revolutionary. Think user-centric. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "branding" really mean? We will incubate the power of mindshare to incubate. Think 24/7. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, models are forced to become enterprise. We will generate the term "viral". Quick: do you have a strategic plan for managing unplanned-for methodologies? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be customer-directed?