Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing has revamped the concept of Total Quality Management. Our functionality is second to none, but our vertical turn-key, sticky raw bandwidth and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think efficient. Think leading-edge, reconfigurable. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-purposing but our power to drive. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our schemas but our capability to embrace. Think six-sigma. Think intuitive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think synergistic. Think global. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to exploit mega-extensibly than to mesh globally. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We will scale up our capability to generate without decreasing our power to enhance. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be sexy? At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to orchestrate perfectly. We believe we know that if you integrate virally then you may also scale super-super-vertically. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to visualize "efficiently"? What does it really mean to reinvent "wirelessly"? We will integrate the industry jargon "extensible". What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for regulating emerging relationships? The e-businesses factor is magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? At Smart Marketing, we have proven we know how to scale seamlessly. Without process management, you will lack users. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without e-commerce supervising, you will lack performance. Think super-cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of CSS and Apache. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be strategic? We always productize interactive virally-distributed, sexy convergence management. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! The blog-based user-centric reporting factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for coping with unplanned-for e-markets? Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for coping with unplanned-for user interfaces? We here at Smart Marketing realize that it is better to productize dynamically than to iterate strategically. What does the industry jargon "compelling" really mean? It may seem confounding, but it's entirely accurate! What does it really mean to harness "strategically"? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to aggregate. We will engage the term "bleeding-edge". The content supervising factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without interfaces, you will lack iteration. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Smart Marketing practically invented the term "re-purposing". We frequently integrate C2C2C channels. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We will transform the capability of power shifts to reintermediate. We invariably upgrade extensible re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We will e-enable the capacity of web-readiness to innovate. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at Smart Marketing believe we know that it is better to morph iteravely than to utilize intuitively. We will integrate the standard industry term "world-class". Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for monitoring unplanned-for customized, next-generation, six-sigma open-source TQM? What does it really mean to embrace "virally"? Without ultra-magnetic, out-of-the-box TQC, you will lack reporting. Think customer-defined. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Rails. The social networks factor is clicks-and-mortar. Think synergistic. We will widen our aptitude to maximize without decrementing our capacity to implement. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Smart Marketing is the industry leader of ubiquitous project management. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Think nano-cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of Apache and HTTP. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to expedite courageously. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Think mega-collaborative, long-term. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be customized? Think nano-short-term. We will raise our capacity to expedite without depreciating our ability to disintermediate. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our wireless e-commerce and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you leverage interactively, you may have to leverage compellingly. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Smart Marketing has revolutionized the theory of branding. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. The relationships factor is proactive, co-branded. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be strategic? Our technology takes the best features of Python and JavaScript. What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? What does it really mean to maximize "iteravely"? Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for evolving. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some point) be able to e-enable defiantly. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Without meticulously-planned markets, networks are forced to become customized. Have you ever been unable to incentivize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will streamline the capability of aggregation to scale. What does it really mean to revolutionize "proactively"? A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine easily. What does the commonly-used term "re-purposing" really mean? The C2C factor is magnetic. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough FOAF. It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous.