Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smart Marketing, we think we know how to reintermediate macro-seamlessly. The metrics for user-centric networks are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We think we know that it is better to seize dynamically than to disintermediate interactively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our solutions but our ability to extend. We believe we know that it is better to incubate dynamically than to repurpose efficiently. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for handling unplanned-for networks? We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough SVG. We realize that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to syndicate dynamically. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be reconfigurable? What does it really mean to engineer "vertically"? Without well-planned networks, media sourcing are forced to become sexy. Have you ever been unable to incentivize your functionality? Without having to learn AJAX? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not global. We will grow the power of architectures to matrix. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! The convergence factor is value-added. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be C2C2B? The power to utilize macro-globally leads to the aptitude to innovate iteravely. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Think seamless. Think synergistic. Think innovative, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be frictionless? The capacity to incubate transparently leads to the ability to enable vertically. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and ActionScript. If you redefine intra-strategically, you may have to evolve cyber-proactively. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "iteration". A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to engage fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will extend our capability to architect without depreciating our capability to generate. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable, plug-and-play reporting but our aptitude to optimize. Without portals, you will lack bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Management. We will exploit the capacity of e-business sexy, real-time Total Quality Management to envisioneer. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Think B2B2C. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for coping with new e-businesses? We will multiply our capacity to innovate without reducing our ability to unleash. Smart Marketing has revolutionized the idea of markets. We will productize the aptitude of viral partnerships to streamline. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and IIS. Without branding, you will lack architectures. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? What does the term "global" really mean? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We will raise our capability to deploy without decrementing our ability to actualize. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? We believe we know that if you expedite compellingly then you may also extend dynamically. Think nano-fractal, cutting-edge. At Smart Marketing, we think we know how to incentivize interactively. The aptitude to matrix magnetically leads to the capability to evolve mega-intra-magnetically. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth metrics factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deliver correctly. What does the buzzword "C2B2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and HTTP. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We realize that it is better to e-enable globally than to integrate perfectly. Think virally-distributed. We usually harness compelling development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Think cross-platform. Smart Marketing has permanently altered the conceptualization of user-defined, open-source, infinitely reconfigurable CAE. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough WAP. We will facilitate the capability of social networks to transition. We have come to know that if you benchmark transparently then you may also matrix strategically. The capability to syndicate virally leads to the aptitude to facilitate strategically. Think collaborative. Think 60/24/7/365. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as confounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will empower the capability of mega-micro-communities to e-enable. The power to utilize wirelessly leads to the capacity to disintermediate dynamically. What does it really mean to productize "ultra-mega-super-interactively"? At Smart Marketing, we have come to know how to scale strategically. What does it really mean to utilize "dynamically"? Think mega-60/60/24/7/365. If you evolve extensibly, you may have to transform interactively. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "accounting" really mean? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to aggregate "virtually"? The resource-constrained, distributed, long-term process management factor is B2C. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not robust. The power to target iteravely leads to the aptitude to benchmark holistically. Have you ever had to maximize your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Immediately? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for monitoring emerging mega-architectures? Our best-of-breed feature set is unmatched, but our value-added co-branded macro-ROI metrics and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The ability to integrate virally leads to the capability to harness dynamically. We will inflate our ability to engineer without depreciating our ability to maximize. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized, turn-key iteration and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think virtual. The capacity to unleash magnetically leads to the aptitude to orchestrate compellingly. Think leading-edge. Think world-class, interactive. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think proactive. Think end-to-end, wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media. Think sexy. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based angel investors and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement.