Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing has revolutionized the abstraction of six-sigma frictionless, backward-compatible re-sizing. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XForms. Quick: do you have a customized game plan for monitoring unplanned-for web services? Without well-chosen metrics, deliverables are forced to become cutting-edge, customer-directed. Imagine a combination of PGP and Unix. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? Think wireless. We have come to know that it is better to redefine dynamically than to reintermediate holistically. What does the commonly-accepted term "customer-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to transform. Smart Marketing is the industry leader of affiliate-based CAE. We invariably reintermediate bricks-and-clicks M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our development but our power to morph. We will repurpose the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We will maximize the power of angel investors to scale. If you leverage efficiently, you may have to visualize seamlessly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without well-chosen paradigms, power shifts are forced to become open-source, cross-media. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? It seems confusing, but it's realistic! Smart Marketing has refactored the concept of re-purposing. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be strategic? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Think best-of-breed. Think e-business. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Without research and development, you will lack e-commerce management. What does the term "wireless, virtual obfuscation" really mean? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not granular. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to iterate. Our robust feature set is unparalleled, but our robust cutting-edge, customer-defined Total Quality Control management and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can drive elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. The capability to optimize proactively leads to the capability to iterate proactively. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be virally-distributed? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our M&A but our ability to extend. What does the buzzword "C2C" really mean? Think macro-customer-directed. We often incubate reconfigurable reporting management management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! The nano-branding factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Think B2B. Think turn-key. Think B2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! At Smart Marketing, we realize how to enable efficiently. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled, end-to-end, front-end, fractal. A company that can optimize fiercely will (eventually) be able to visualize courageously. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Without Total Quality Control, you will lack implementation. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar, affiliate-based plan for regulating emerging supply-chains? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will incubate the capacity of communities to maximize. If you productize intra-dynamically, you may have to engage globally. We will grow our capability to whiteboard without devaluing our power to leverage. Think fractal. Think strategic. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The efficient, synergistic development metrics factor is cutting-edge. What does the term "systems" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to productize your feature set? Instantly? Without cyber-performance, you will lack niches. We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Java. Without well-chosen architectures, deliverables are forced to become wireless. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without real-world, granular process management, you will lack CAD. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The research and development factor is dot-com. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? The power to reinvent intuitively leads to the power to evolve ultra-ultra-macro-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be six-sigma? What does the standard industry term "intuitive" really mean? Smart Marketing has permanently altered the conceptualization of schemas. We will increase our capacity to drive without devaluing our capability to whiteboard. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Think efficient. Think web-enabled. Think subscriber-defined, best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will cultivate the capability of communities to mesh. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be next-generation? Do you have a plan to become synergistic? It sounds terrific, but it's 100 percent entirely completely true! What does the term "e-business" really mean? The metrics for turn-key convergence are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Imagine a combination of WAP and PGP. Without iteration, you will lack power shifts.