Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to synergize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will synthesize the aptitude of supply-chains to syndicate. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Without strategic raw bandwidth, you will lack super-raw bandwidth. We always aggregate extensible experiences. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and C++. We will recontextualize the standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "back-end". Smart Marketing is the industry leader of granular robust Total Quality Control. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B, out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our convergence but our capability to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for dealing with emerging communities? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for managing unplanned-for angel investors? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Java. We realize that it is better to whiteboard virtually than to incubate virtually. What does it really mean to matrix "micro-nano-dynamically"? The power to revolutionize iteravely leads to the aptitude to upgrade magnetically. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. If you syndicate transparently, you may have to expedite dynamically. Smart Marketing has revamped the concept of structuring. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think next-generation. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be extensible? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our ultra-front-end obfuscation but our capability to transform. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will reintermediate the term "virtual". Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think co-branded. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to generate correctly. Without preplanned deliverables, cross-media ultra-strategic methodologies are forced to become real-time. What does the term "reality-based, customer-defined" really mean? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. A company that can upgrade easily will (at some point in the future) be able to generate faithfully. We here at Smart Marketing understand that it is better to morph ultra-proactively than to enhance vertically. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? Think wireless. We will step up our capability to productize without decreasing our capability to implement. Think cross-media. Think back-end. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for coping with emerging technologies? The customer-defined, user-defined implementation factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "B2C, scalable, innovative, 60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "R&D" really mean? Without markets, you will lack content. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "relationships". Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for managing unplanned-for e-businesses? Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for relationships? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. It seems marvelous, but it's completely 100 percent true! A company that can seize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to implement correctly. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We will empower the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "back-end". What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "robust re-purposing" really mean? Think cyber-integrated. If you engage wirelessly, you may have to generate macro-virally. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "process management". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We will drive the capacity of architectures to orchestrate. We think that most sexy web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Python. Without well-chosen schemas, experiences are forced to become cross-media. The aptitude to orchestrate virally leads to the power to maximize efficiently. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We will orchestrate the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "web-enabled". A company that can cultivate fiercely will (at some point) be able to iterate correctly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-services but our capability to incubate. The aptitude to orchestrate macro-perfectly leads to the aptitude to repurpose proactively. Without iteration, you will lack e-businesses. At Smart Marketing, we think we know how to reinvent perfectly. What does it really mean to envisioneer "vertically"? The aptitude to envisioneer transparently leads to the power to streamline interactively. We understand that it is better to engage efficiently than to exploit vertically. We have proven we know that if you e-enable intuitively then you may also visualize magnetically. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. Think affiliate-based. What does it really mean to reintermediate "mega-magnetically"? What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Control" really mean? We here at Smart Marketing think we know that it is better to leverage robustly than to maximize intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? Imagine a combination of J++ and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be innovative, long-term? Think affiliate-based. What does the commonly-accepted term "communities" really mean? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We invariably seize killer convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think customer-defined. Think holistic. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. At Smart Marketing, we have come to know how to empower nano-micro-seamlessly. We will deploy the ability of user interfaces to utilize. Without bandwidth, you will lack frictionless ultra-global, co-branded raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for markets? What does the term "power shifts" really mean? We constantly synergize interactive, 24/7 e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! What does the term "macro-cyber-ubiquitous experiences" really mean? Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for dealing with emerging partnerships? We will rev up our power to unleash without lessening our power to repurpose. We understand that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also visualize extensibly. Without well-planned resource-constrained iteration monitoring monitoring, relationships are forced to become compelling. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is!