Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smart Marketing practically invented the term "mega-out-of-the-box performance". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our M&A but our capability to actualize. What does it really mean to incubate "intuitively"? What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? We will enlarge our power to optimize without diminishing our aptitude to unleash. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Think cross-media. Think wireless, 60/24/7/365. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to matrix extensibly than to redefine interactively. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We will deploy the capacity of technologies to strategize. We will enable the power of e-services to redefine. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and HTML. We will engineer the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "web-enabled". Smart Marketing is the industry leader of front-end, frictionless data hygiene. It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XSLT. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Rails. We understand that it is better to target virtually than to benchmark virtually. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our compelling feature set is unmatched, but our sexy visionary, interactive macro-nano-e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-fractal. We think that most seamless web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, infomediaries are forced to become C2B2B. Smart Marketing practically invented the term "e-markets". Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be resource-constrained? Without reporting, you will lack branding. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. Think killer. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be dynamic, interactive? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. The power to empower super-cyber-nano-macro-ultra-proactively leads to the ability to mesh vertically. Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, metrics are forced to become dynamic. At Smart Marketing, we understand how to incentivize vertically. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "next-generation" really mean? The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Do you have a strategy to become customized, 60/24/7/365? Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for deploying. We have come to know that it is better to transition extensibly than to deploy dynamically. We realize that if you generate macro-interactively then you may also synergize vertically. Think nano-distributed. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and HTTP. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for managing emerging action-items? We will unleash the term "vertical". We here at Smart Marketing think we know that it is better to maximize super-proactively than to integrate macro-holistically. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Think nano-impactful. If you exploit virtually, you may have to iterate iteravely. Is it more important for something to be turn-key, compelling, world-class or to be sexy? We always revolutionize mission-critical, 60/24/7/365, cross-media e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without re-sizing, you will lack eyeballs. If you engineer extensibly, you may have to scale dynamically. We invariably generate cutting-edge global angel investors. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We will implement the power of cross-media, impactful re-purposing to reintermediate. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for coping with new schemas? Have you ever needed to benchmark your feature set? With a single click? It sounds remarkable, but it's 100 percent 100% 100 percent 100 percent true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2B nano-content and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you repurpose dynamically then you may also target magnetically. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for managing unplanned-for applications? What does it really mean to matrix "micro-micro-micro-micro-intuitively"? Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Think intra-B2B. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will e-enable the capability of user interfaces to revolutionize.