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Andrew Davidson.
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Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Company Name: 

Your Randomly-Generated Corporate Gibberish:


We will revalue our power to empower without decreasing our power to enhance.
We here at SipsCo understand that it is better to grow efficiently than to facilitate iteravely. Imagine a combination of J2EE and OWL. We will raise our aptitude to architect without decrementing our aptitude to scale. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. It seems amazing, but it's true! The capability to innovate globally leads to the aptitude to empower globally. What does it really mean to morph "mega-perfectly"? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Without well-planned subscriber communities, biometrics are forced to become ubiquitous.
We will optimize the term "C2C2B".
SipsCo practically invented the term "seamless, integrated web services". The ability to incentivize strategically leads to the ability to cultivate holistically. What does it really mean to engage "magnetically"? Without aggregation, you will lack bandwidth. Think long-term, B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be C2C2C? Without adequate subscriber communities, out-of-the-box functionalities are forced to become killer. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and DOM. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed structuring and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think mega-cross-platform. Think cyber-clicks-and-mortar. Think micro-strategic.
Without well-planned methodologies, metrics are forced to become long-term.
At SipsCo, we have come to know how to repurpose magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We think that most compelling web applications use far too much C++, and not enough XML. Quick: do you have a viral game plan for managing unplanned-for e-markets? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without meticulously-planned systems, solutions are forced to become innovative. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for regulating new magnetic technologies? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our performance but our capacity to synthesize. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed?
We have come to know that it is better to reinvent super-nano-ultra-perfectly than to aggregate compellingly.
SipsCo practically invented the term "niches". Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for regulating new dynamic e-tailers? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and CSS. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark compellingly than to brand holistically. We will inflate our ability to brand without decreasing our ability to repurpose. The ability to upgrade proactively leads to the aptitude to enhance virally. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our models but our capacity to productize. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our development but our capacity to evolve.
We believe we know that it is better to morph globally than to upgrade cyber-super-cyber-interactively.
Have you ever wanted to innovate your feature set? Without having to learn Rails? Think customized. We will unleash the capacity of initiatives to facilitate. Without sufficient web-readiness, e-services are forced to become one-to-one. Without front-end, cutting-edge versioning, you will lack experiences. We think that most proactive portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without solutions, you will lack viral versioning. Think super-macro-ubiquitous. We will embrace the term "mission-critical". The power to redefine virtually leads to the capability to evolve compellingly. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Apache. Without synergies, you will lack structuring.
Without Total Quality Management, you will lack re-sizing.
SipsCo has permanently altered the conceptualization of infomediaries. We think that most collaborative, sexy web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough FOAF. We have proven we know that if you brand cyber-efficiently then you may also synergize globally. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "granular" really mean? If you target micro-magnetically, you may have to morph vertically. If you innovate intuitively, you may have to deliver virtually. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to e-enable. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our magnetic feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined visionary M&A and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to integrate "transparently"? The development factor is virally-distributed, e-business. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG.

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When Body Language Goes Bad: A Dilbert Book
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I Sense a Coldness to Your Mentoring: A Dilbert Book
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All 30 episodes from the first and second seasons!