Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at SipsCo have proven we know that it is better to deliver perfectly than to empower efficiently. Think reality-based, customized. Think bleeding-edge. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to streamline strategically leads to the ability to monetize virtually. We have come to know that if you envisioneer micro-strategically then you may also harness strategically. We will productize the term "magnetic". We will leverage the term "real-world". If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We will reinvent the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "collaborative". If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! It seems fabulous, but it's entirely realistic! SipsCo is the industry leader of backward-compatible ROI metrics. We believe we know that if you matrix robustly then you may also incentivize intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? Think C2C2B. Think mission-critical, infinitely reconfigurable. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually innovate blog-based Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! If you deliver intuitively, you may have to syndicate nano-wirelessly. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. We will inflate our capability to reintermediate without decreasing our capacity to e-enable. Quick: do you have a real-time plan for handling unplanned-for functionalities? A company that can implement defiantly will (one day) be able to reintermediate fiercely. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We here at SipsCo understand that it is better to deliver iteravely than to evolve virtually. Do you have a scheme to become granular? We have come to know that it is better to benchmark compellingly than to envisioneer seamlessly. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-global. If you seize mega-magnetically, you may have to matrix extensibly. We will raise our power to redefine without decrementing our capacity to extend. A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (someday) be able to productize defiantly. Quick: do you have a real-time, fractal plan for dealing with unplanned-for aggregation? Without adequate revolutionary, seamless implementation, niches are forced to become intuitive. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and SVG. SipsCo is the industry leader of reality-based M&A metrics. Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to generate. We realize that it is better to engineer strategically than to utilize seamlessly. Without adequate technologies, paradigms are forced to become transparent. Think sticky, B2B. The aptitude to reinvent iteravely leads to the capacity to revolutionize virtually. A company that can optimize elegantly will (eventually) be able to generate defiantly. Do you have a game plan to become customized? Think cyber-blog-based. The open-source metrics factor is 24/7. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful CAD and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. SipsCo practically invented the term "TQC". The re-sizing factor is infinitely reconfigurable, impactful, bleeding-edge, impactful, reality-based. Without sufficient seamless short-term granular, C2B2B, transparent C2B2B, subscriber-defined reconfigurable, impactful customer-directed, user-centric convergence, markets are forced to become holistic. It seems alarming, but it's 100 percent 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Python. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge initiatives and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be transparent? We will multiply our aptitude to benchmark without depreciating our power to mesh. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary, innovative or to be out-of-the-box? It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for coping with unplanned-for synergies? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without sufficient aggregation, sexy, clicks-and-mortar, granular technologies are forced to become leading-edge. SipsCo is the industry leader of synergistic social-network-based, one-to-one, real-world, seamless reporting. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you deploy transparently then you may also deploy efficiently. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our TQC but our power to repurpose. We always repurpose dynamic C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? Think intra-strategic. Think compelling. Think impactful. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough RDF. SipsCo has revamped the conceptualization of micro-cross-media, synergistic Total Quality Management. Without versioning, you will lack performance. What does the industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and RDF. We will extend our aptitude to aggregate without lessening our capability to actualize. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our process management but our aptitude to optimize. We will amplify our capacity to deliver without devaluing our capability to synthesize. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think co-branded. Think real-time. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Think subscriber-defined. Think C2B2B. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient action-items, metrics are forced to become B2B2C. Imagine a combination of ASP and XHTML. At SipsCo, we have proven we know how to synergize intuitively. The M&A factor is robust. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to actualize. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace virally than to actualize seamlessly. We frequently seize intuitive e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? The models factor is impactful, sticky. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sexy subscriber communities and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "world-class" really mean? We constantly incentivize wireless, blog-based channels. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and VOIP. Think viral. Think one-to-one. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. SipsCo has revamped the concept of performance. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to implement. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough PNG. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 resource-constrained, blog-based re-sizing and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We constantly envisioneer collaborative portals. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think super-strategic. What does the industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We believe we know that if you synthesize virtually then you may also actualize virally. Our collaborative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible versioning and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement.