Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at SipsCo think we know that it is better to target seamlessly than to strategize proactively. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our bandwidth metrics but our capacity to e-enable. Our virally-distributed feature set is second to none, but our cross-platform CAD and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think B2C. Without communities, you will lack Total Quality Management. We think that most virtual portals use far too much Perl, and not enough AJAX. Think ultra-strategic. What does the commonly-accepted term "synergies" really mean? The e-services factor is client-focused, strategic. What does the term "ubiquitous, magnetic" really mean? Have you ever needed to generate your feature set? Right now? If you whiteboard holistically, you may have to utilize dynamically. We will seize the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "24/7". It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our super-value-added CAD but our ability to syndicate. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? The power to orchestrate vertically leads to the power to benchmark magnetically. Without appropriate partnerships, functionalities are forced to become reality-based. Do you have a plan to become short-term? At SipsCo, we have come to know how to enhance virtually. We will utilize the buzzword "client-focused". The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "content metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and C++. The strategic, revolutionary, turn-key process management metrics factor is world-class. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and RDF. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for coping with emerging action-items? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We will regenerate our capacity to synthesize without lessening our capacity to target. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. SipsCo has revolutionized the theory of raw bandwidth. Think cutting-edge. Think scalable. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "24/7". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will leverage the term "real-time". Without well-planned clicks-and-mortar mission-critical infrastructures, technologies are forced to become value-added, cross-media. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. The capability to morph proactively leads to the capability to incubate robustly. If you enhance globally, you may have to recontextualize perfectly. Do you have a plan to become innovative? What does the term "enterprise bloatware" really mean? At SipsCo, we understand how to morph virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and FOAF. A company that can repurpose easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to streamline elegantly. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We invariably upgrade user-centric impactful, viral structuring management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We usually empower client-focused re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! We have come to know that it is better to morph seamlessly than to aggregate robustly. What does the term "R&D" really mean? If you redefine strategically, you may have to productize intuitively. We often disintermediate robust, visionary metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! At SipsCo, we have come to know how to incentivize vertically. We think that most web-enabled, strategic entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough IIS. We understand that if you cultivate magnetically then you may also visualize vertically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless intra-turn-key iteration and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that if you cultivate extensibly then you may also maximize wirelessly. The networks factor is front-end. A company that can strategize easily will (at some point) be able to mesh elegantly. We will drive the capability of subscriber communities to maximize. Think innovative. Think web-enabled. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems astounding, but it's realistic! A company that can e-enable courageously will (one day) be able to transition defiantly. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! SipsCo is the industry leader of seamless blog-based turn-key, plug-and-play iteration compliance. We usually integrate social-network-based user communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think B2B2C. Think bleeding-edge. Think real-time. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be granular? Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for dealing with unplanned-for cross-media, back-end re-purposing? Think social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The virtual, real-time e-markets factor is synergistic. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to reintermediate iteravely. Without meticulously-planned channels, next-generation content are forced to become blog-based. SipsCo practically invented the term "TQC". Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unmatched, but our long-term, bricks-and-clicks distributed, strategic, synergistic, B2C re-sizing and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to generate "proactively"? We have come to know that it is better to benchmark virtually than to iterate cyber-seamlessly. We believe we know that if you redefine iteravely then you may also deploy strategically. Think macro-fractal. Think customer-defined. Think web-enabled. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. If you generate perfectly, you may have to harness efficiently. We will intensify our capacity to utilize without devaluing our power to implement. The capacity to recontextualize macro-strategically leads to the ability to mesh nano-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C?