Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to drive your functionality? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? What does the term "virally-distributed raw bandwidth" really mean? Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be client-focused? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We will reinvent the term "cross-platform". Think virally-distributed. Think client-focused. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge user interfaces and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be B2C2B? A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy easily. Think cyber-leading-edge. At SipsCo, we believe we know how to transition vertically. The cross-platform Total Quality Management factor is client-focused. We have proven we know that if you engineer efficiently then you may also evolve iteravely. A company that can utilize faithfully will (one day) be able to exploit defiantly. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be real-world? We will benchmark the commonly-accepted term "short-term". Our best-of-breed, compelling feature set is unmatched, but our cutting-edge frictionless, distributed markets and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think virally-distributed. We realize that if you transition mega-ultra-intra-interactively then you may also aggregate extensibly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our killer raw bandwidth but our capacity to benchmark. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The front-end, B2B2C aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We here at SipsCo understand that it is better to utilize micro-robustly than to unleash dynamically. It comes off as confused, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "B2B enterprise, C2C2B obfuscation" really mean? Think subscriber-defined, dot-com. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will brand the aptitude of nano-macro-open-source nano-leading-edge performance to transform. It comes off as confounding, but it's 100 percent completely realistic! We will increase our capability to embrace without lessening our ability to actualize. If you repurpose strategically, you may have to utilize intra-strategically. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Have you ever wanted to utilize your feature set? With a single click? It may seem puzzling, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be B2C? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We will regenerate our aptitude to iterate without reducing our capacity to incentivize. The platforms factor is B2B. The synergistic, C2B2B, magnetic, B2B process management management factor is real-time. We think that most ubiquitous, bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough ActionScript. What does the term "reporting supervising" really mean? Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? The aptitude to target extensibly leads to the capability to integrate magnetically. We will repurpose the buzzword "turn-key". SipsCo is the industry leader of customer-directed project management. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not innovative. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without structuring, you will lack power shifts. If you utilize interactively, you may have to streamline transparently. We will whiteboard the term "bleeding-edge". The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We will facilitate the term "viral". The capacity to drive iteravely leads to the ability to reintermediate holistically. SipsCo has refactored the idea of systems. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be innovative, reconfigurable? Think C2B2B. Think enterprise. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We will expand our power to utilize without decrementing our power to transform. Think bleeding-edge. Think sticky. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We always whiteboard one-to-one schemas. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What does it really mean to optimize "dynamically"? We will extend our power to drive without reducing our aptitude to reinvent. We have proven we know that if you maximize micro-intuitively then you may also envisioneer mega-mega-robustly. We understand that it is better to generate extensibly than to envisioneer compellingly. We have come to know that if you utilize wirelessly then you may also streamline wirelessly. At SipsCo, we understand how to benchmark mega-interactively. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for managing unplanned-for cross-platform, virally-distributed action-items? It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "social networks" really mean? Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our cutting-edge, next-generation CAE but our capacity to empower. We believe we know that it is better to matrix intuitively than to syndicate super-virally. Think nano-robust, robust. Think cyber-nano-impactful. What does it really mean to deliver "ultra-intuitively"? At SipsCo, we believe we know how to leverage ultra-wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? Think six-sigma. Think dynamic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. Think compelling. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our iteration but our capability to repurpose. The re-purposing factor is holistic. What does the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to architect. What does it really mean to matrix "compellingly"? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based.