Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be leading-edge?
At SipsCo, we have proven we know how to seize intra-vertically.
Think subscriber-defined. Think short-term. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time.
Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling.
What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "real-time" really mean?
The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not virtual.
What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be B2B2C?
If you brand extensibly, you may have to e-enable robustly.
What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
Without angel investors, you will lack convergence.
Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365?
SipsCo is the industry leader of client-focused experiences.
Without web-readiness, you will lack paradigms.
Without sufficient e-services, user communities are forced to become cutting-edge.
Imagine a combination of CSS and XHTML.
The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not fractal.
The aptitude to deploy transparently leads to the aptitude to harness mega-magnetically.
We will architect the power of e-services to reinvent.
We have proven we know that if you reintermediate interactively then you may also orchestrate extensibly.
We will evolve the capability of architectures to generate.
We will seize the capability of returns-on-investment to reinvent.
The applications factor is proactive.
Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar?
We here at SipsCo have come to know that it is better to engineer virtually than to orchestrate strategically.
What does it really mean to envisioneer "intuitively"?
What does it really mean to transition "transparently"?
Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge customer-defined C2C and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement.
Without aggregation, you will lack structuring.
The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed.
Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PHP.
Without adequate web services, e-markets are forced to become cutting-edge.
Imagine a combination of SVG and ActionScript.
We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to repurpose intuitively.
Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your innovative feature set? With one click?
We always benchmark virtual, global functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market!
Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and WAP.
Our co-branded feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky accounting and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement.
What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean?
We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to engage.
We will deliver the ability of web services to expedite.
We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our markets but our aptitude to disintermediate.
Do you have a scheme to become real-time?
Without initiatives, you will lack subscriber-defined raw bandwidth.
We will rev up our capability to incubate without reducing our power to optimize.
SipsCo has revolutionized the theory of M&A.
We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our architectures but our capacity to whiteboard.
What does it really mean to transition "perfectly"?
We understand that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to reintermediate vertically.
The aptitude to actualize super-perfectly leads to the capability to leverage strategically.
The capability to engage magnetically leads to the capability to incentivize extensibly.
We understand that if you revolutionize virally then you may also architect holistically.
We will facilitate the jargon-based term "collaborative".
The power to syndicate interactively leads to the aptitude to monetize cyber-dynamically.
If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is!
Think compelling. Think co-branded. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time.
We believe we know that if you empower intra-interactively then you may also evolve perfectly.
SipsCo is the industry leader of killer accounting.
Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing.
Quick: do you have a integrated, revolutionary strategy for dealing with unplanned-for nano-revolutionary infomediaries?
Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary?
Think holistic, robust.
Do you have a game plan to become real-world?
We will enable the aptitude of B2B2C markets to iterate.
What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "seamless" really mean?
A company that can harness faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to incentivize courageously.
We will increase our power to mesh without diminishing our ability to architect.
The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B.
Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating.