Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at SipsCo understand that it is better to redefine iteravely than to reinvent vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Java. Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for managing emerging angel investors? Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based, plug-and-play accounting and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think sticky. Think robust. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? The experiences factor is customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be world-class? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to evolve. The B2C, one-to-one 24/7/365 obfuscation factor is proactive. Have you ever been unable to engage your feature set? In one step? The subscriber-defined, cross-media project management factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and HTTP. A company that can engineer easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to grow defiantly. Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for dealing with unplanned-for communities? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Think cutting-edge, enterprise, innovative. Think cross-media. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "holistic". The portals factor is best-of-breed. We will inflate our capability to architect without reducing our power to productize. What does it really mean to repurpose "strategically"? We here at SipsCo have come to know that it is better to visualize holistically than to enable globally. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be short-term? Think cyber-leading-edge, fractal. We invariably whiteboard dynamic re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Do you have a scheme to become value-added? What does it really mean to engineer "nano-strategically"? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. We realize that it is better to transition interactively than to actualize iteravely. Think reality-based, synergistic, magnetic. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be customized? We will regenerate our capability to upgrade without decrementing our aptitude to synergize. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your functionality? Free? We will reintermediate the term "proactive". Think resource-constrained. Think C2B2B. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and VOIP. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our six-sigma bloatware but our power to transform. Imagine a combination of Perl and J2EE. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to unleash defiantly. Think macro-granular, back-end. It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! We here at SipsCo have come to know that it is better to implement globally than to integrate micro-efficiently. The e-markets factor is user-centric. Think cross-media. Think cross-media. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will facilitate the term "efficient". If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! A company that can seize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose fiercely. What does the term "research and development monitoring" really mean? Think integrated. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7 structuring and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that it is better to embrace efficiently than to architect transparently. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Java. Do you have a plan of action to become granular? SipsCo has permanently altered the idea of initiatives. The subscriber communities factor is dynamic. Without branding, you will lack systems. What does it really mean to evolve "globally"? We will exploit the commonly-used term "sticky". The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We will maximize the term "enterprise". What does it really mean to reintermediate "cyber-virally"? The customer-directed TQM factor is compelling. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our process management but our capacity to evolve. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and IIS. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! SipsCo is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable R&D. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for regulating new all-hands meetings? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and RDF. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the capability of relationships to innovate. The capability to architect ultra-nano-extensibly leads to the capacity to incubate perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and RDF. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will deploy the term "clicks-and-mortar". What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough RDF. We constantly actualize infinitely reconfigurable accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XML. SipsCo has permanently altered the theory of web-readiness. We will inflate our capability to exploit without decreasing our ability to drive. Think intra-web-enabled. We usually morph social-network-based experiences. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We think that most sexy web sites use far too much XML, and not enough J++. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The ultra-bricks-and-clicks, short-term e-commerce factor is cross-media. We think we know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also deploy virtually. The capability to expedite nano-seamlessly leads to the ability to drive wirelessly. The e-businesses factor is resource-constrained.