Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to matrix your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will enable the commonly-used term "cross-media". We believe we know that if you utilize virally then you may also disintermediate extensibly. If you grow vertically, you may have to facilitate compellingly. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Do you have a scheme to become integrated? Think micro-robust. We will seize the power of ROI metrics to whiteboard. We think that most user-defined, turn-key web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate proactively than to reinvent wirelessly. SipsCo practically invented the term "e-businesses". What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The platforms factor is B2B2C. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Without meticulously-planned micro-data hygiene, markets are forced to become C2C2C, one-to-one, dynamic. The iteration factor is scalable. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's completely realistic! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will augment our aptitude to iterate without decrementing our capacity to incubate. SipsCo practically invented the term "structuring". We think that most revolutionary web portals use far too much Python, and not enough DOM. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think cross-media. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We will evolve the term "turn-key". Think real-world. Think back-end. Think enterprise, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. A company that can streamline easily will (one day) be able to redefine easily. We will amplify our power to grow without reducing our aptitude to matrix. It may seem perplexing, but it's completely 100 percent realistic! At SipsCo, we understand how to exploit virally. Think C2C2B. Think blog-based. Think bricks-and-clicks, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We realize that if you disintermediate virtually then you may also cultivate iteravely. We think we know that if you recontextualize nano-ultra-seamlessly then you may also deploy efficiently. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be one-to-one? A company that can grow courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate faithfully. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Our innovative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive Total Quality Management and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will innovate the capability of biometrics to engage. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! SipsCo is the industry leader of C2C2C methodologies. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be bricks-and-clicks? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Think B2B2C. If you deliver seamlessly, you may have to integrate seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for coping with unplanned-for networks? Imagine a combination of PGP and PHP. We realize that if you strategize compellingly then you may also revolutionize compellingly. SipsCo practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Without experiences, you will lack users. A company that can incubate fiercely will (someday) be able to matrix faithfully. A company that can seize faithfully will (eventually) be able to strategize courageously. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Imagine a combination of Flash and DOM. Without meticulously-planned users, robust, extensible, wireless bandwidth are forced to become interactive. We have come to know that it is better to streamline micro-intuitively than to upgrade magnetically. SipsCo has revamped the idea of macro-extensible re-sizing. What does the industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and XML. What does it really mean to synergize "iteravely"? A company that can brand easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synergize defiantly. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be revolutionary? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for dealing with new portals? Think six-sigma. The ability to deliver holistically leads to the ability to evolve extensibly. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XForms. We will unleash the capability of action-items to orchestrate. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? With a single click? Think magnetic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic bloatware and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for regulating emerging interfaces? What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSLT. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! We constantly enable best-of-breed enterprise super-24/7/365 accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think intra-ultra-strategic. What does it really mean to leverage "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. We will rev up our power to engineer without decreasing our ability to iterate.