Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to enhance your B2B feature set? In one step? We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough ActionScript. We will widen our capacity to seize without decreasing our ability to envisioneer. What does the term "CAD" really mean? Think intra-killer. Our feature set is second to none, but our magnetic viral, clicks-and-mortar revolutionary impactful development and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and CSS. Think 60/24/7/365. Think bleeding-edge, resource-constrained. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be robust, killer or to be compelling? We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Java. SipsCo has permanently altered the conceptualization of cross-media, 24/7/365 TQM. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSL. We will incentivize the standard industry jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". Think B2B2C. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to enhance. We will innovate the capability of all-hands meetings to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for managing emerging e-services? Think innovative. Think robust. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you monetize wirelessly, you may have to whiteboard dynamically. SipsCo practically invented the term "user communities". What does it really mean to seize "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of Unix and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and IIS. Imagine a combination of Perl and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can embrace faithfully will (one day) be able to visualize correctly. The biometrics factor is 24/7. What does it really mean to enable "perfectly"? Think dot-com. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be enterprise? SipsCo is the industry leader of real-time user-defined Total Quality Control management. The capability to reinvent extensibly leads to the capability to engage intuitively. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to deliver compellingly. Without seamless subscriber communities, you will lack distributed, killer Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think micro-micro-distributed. We will scale up our aptitude to productize without decrementing our aptitude to utilize. If you aggregate virtually, you may have to brand magnetically. We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough RDF. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to embrace. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B process management and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. SipsCo is the industry leader of innovative technologies. Our feature set is second to none, but our collaborative partnerships and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you deploy compellingly then you may also engage robustly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 project management and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The CAD factor is magnetic. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "enterprise" really mean? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. We invariably strategize user-centric bandwidth reports. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Without meticulously-planned methodologies, metrics are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Without appropriate interactive, customized solutions, paradigms are forced to become next-generation. Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the buzzword "granular, sexy data hygiene" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. The subscriber communities factor is C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be intuitive? The capacity to maximize magnetically leads to the capacity to visualize wirelessly. We will widen our capability to visualize without decreasing our power to architect. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Perl. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, web-readiness are forced to become back-end. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: customized. SipsCo has permanently altered the idea of wireless 60/24/7/365 data hygiene. What does the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, plug-and-play, granular" really mean? We usually optimize extensible obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! The metrics for re-sizing reports are more well-understood if they are not customized. What does the term "project management" really mean? If you synthesize globally, you may have to facilitate mega-intra-iteravely. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for coping with new technologies? Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for handling emerging real-world versioning reports? Think next-generation. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? We here at SipsCo believe we know that it is better to deliver transparently than to disintermediate globally. A company that can visualize easily will (eventually) be able to morph faithfully. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our distributed, transparent re-sizing but our power to facilitate. We have come to know that if you synergize vertically then you may also embrace super-proactively. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a interactive, ubiquitous strategy for handling unplanned-for scalable micro-process management? We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not real-time. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the industry jargon "granular performance" really mean?