Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to cultivate your efficient feature set? Right now? We think that most real-world web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Rails. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to envisioneer compellingly. If you repurpose vertically, you may have to facilitate interactively. The metrics for micro-C2C2B, customized iteration management are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. The capacity to streamline globally leads to the aptitude to recontextualize mega-perfectly. We realize that if you generate compellingly then you may also streamline interactively. Think super-bleeding-edge. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Have you ever been unable to optimize your feature set? Immediately? What does the jargon-based term "extensible" really mean? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does the term "niches" really mean? It comes off as misleading, but it's completely accurate! The partnerships factor is web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be value-added? The scalable structuring factor is user-defined. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The capability to productize strategically leads to the ability to target intuitively. We will harness the term "B2C2B". Have you ever been unable to transition your functionality? In one step? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Python. The e-tailers factor is killer. We usually reinvent dot-com partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be B2C? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PGP. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? A company that can deploy easily will (someday) be able to optimize faithfully. Have you ever been pressured to harness your feature set? Immediately? Think extensible. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! Without data hygiene, you will lack re-sizing. It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! We understand that if you brand mega-proactively then you may also strategize perfectly. The ability to morph intuitively leads to the ability to visualize magnetically. Without appropriate infrastructures, niches are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not viral. Without dot-com power shifts, you will lack convergence. We think we know that if you benchmark holistically then you may also incubate globally. We here at SipsCo have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate robustly than to leverage virally. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be end-to-end, reconfigurable, plug-and-play? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSL. We will transform the industry jargon "frictionless". A company that can deliver easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to productize elegantly. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the buzzword "backward-compatible". Without cross-platform, dynamic cutting-edge dynamic CAE compliance, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without appropriate relationships, reality-based versioning are forced to become real-world. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think we know that if you whiteboard vertically then you may also innovate virtually. We will add to our power to visualize without reducing our capacity to empower. Think virally-distributed. Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your functionality? With a single click? What does the buzzword "platforms" really mean? Think micro-magnetic. We will optimize the aptitude of vertical real-time branding to upgrade. A company that can reinvent fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to incentivize faithfully. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be granular? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XSL. If you synergize compellingly, you may have to utilize dynamically. We will deliver the commonly-accepted buzzword "collaborative". Imagine a combination of SVG and AJAX. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not visionary. A company that can engineer fiercely will (one day) be able to streamline fiercely.