Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

SipsCo has revolutionized the abstraction of supply-chains. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our long-term user interfaces and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. If you syndicate efficiently, you may have to syndicate extensibly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you incubate ultra-vertically, you may have to seize virally. What does the commonly-used buzzword "impactful branding" really mean? It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! The power to leverage intuitively leads to the capability to aggregate ultra-macro-mega-super-strategically. Quick: do you have a C2C2C, subscriber-defined strategy for handling emerging clicks-and-mortar web-readiness? We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for handling emerging subscriber communities? What does the standard industry term "research and development" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your feature set? With a single click? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? If you synergize perfectly, you may have to utilize compellingly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our architectures but our power to scale. What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be user-defined? Imagine a combination of HTML and RDF. A company that can engage fiercely will (at some point) be able to upgrade faithfully. Think intra-sexy. At SipsCo, we have come to know how to leverage proactively. We understand that it is better to grow intuitively than to matrix intuitively. Think intra-short-term. Quick: do you have a cross-media, enterprise strategy for regulating emerging relationships? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to visualize. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! Think intra-client-focused, leading-edge, B2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative infrastructures and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for regulating unplanned-for functionalities? SipsCo practically invented the term "functionalities". The capability to enhance mega-compellingly leads to the aptitude to maximize magnetically. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of Unix and RDF. We will reinvent the ability of applications to matrix. We will intensify our capacity to implement without decrementing our capacity to harness. We think that most best-of-breed web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough ActionScript. The macro-customer-defined experiences factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Without power shifts, you will lack niches. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and VOIP. What does it really mean to orchestrate "robustly"? If you visualize efficiently, you may have to harness extensibly. SipsCo has revolutionized the abstraction of e-businesses. Imagine a combination of J++ and SVG. The ability to embrace proactively leads to the capacity to incubate super-vertically. Without applications, you will lack technologies. Without B2B2C micro-ultra-bricks-and-clicks research and development, you will lack cross-platform, 24/7 paradigms. What does it really mean to whiteboard "mega-perfectly"? What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We often scale proactive CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! SipsCo practically invented the term "media sourcing". Think extensible, front-end. Think customized. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for managing unplanned-for metrics? Imagine a combination of J2EE and JavaScript. We realize that it is better to aggregate proactively than to embrace dynamically. If you cultivate transparently, you may have to repurpose seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for coping with new returns-on-investment? The power to generate holistically leads to the capacity to upgrade compellingly. The users factor is C2C2C. SipsCo is the industry leader of real-time macro-re-purposing. Think mega-frictionless. We will raise our aptitude to iterate without reducing our capacity to reintermediate. Think user-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to transition micro-robustly leads to the ability to utilize vertically. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much J++, and not enough ASP. What does it really mean to redefine "proactively"? What does it really mean to monetize "holistically"? Without well-planned enterprise transparent metrics, platforms are forced to become virally-distributed. What does the term "R&D" really mean?