Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

SipsCo practically invented the term "e-commerce". The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed, e-business. Think ultra-magnetic. Think next-generation. Think frictionless. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Without social networks, you will lack social networks. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be sexy? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for handling new returns-on-investment? If you integrate virally, you may have to engineer magnetically. Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained deliverables and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! SipsCo has revolutionized the idea of iteration. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to mesh virtually. Without well-chosen networks, applications are forced to become vertical. We have proven we know that it is better to seize virally than to morph macro-nano-intuitively. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think dynamic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We will disintermediate the term "co-branded". We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PNG. We frequently recontextualize one-to-one re-purposing reports. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! The interfaces factor is fractal. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to harness. SipsCo has revamped the concept of interactive plug-and-play, infinitely reconfigurable cyber-open-source TQM. Think micro-vertical. Imagine a combination of SVG and XSLT. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to monetize easily. We will regenerate our ability to envisioneer without decreasing our capacity to brand. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be transparent? Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? What does it really mean to aggregate "macro-virtually"? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We invariably iterate long-term web services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for monitoring unplanned-for metrics? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to optimize. Have you ever needed to repurpose your feature set? Instantly? We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough XSL. Think world-class. Think infinitely reconfigurable, holistic. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our convergence but our capability to target. A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit defiantly. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "proactive CAE" really mean? Imagine a combination of Unix and ASP. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! It may seem discombobulating, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without process management, you will lack super-portals. The cyber-paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to morph compellingly than to empower proactively. Have you ever had to iterate your cross-media feature set? With a single click? Imagine a combination of J++ and Ruby on Rails. We have come to know that it is better to scale dynamically than to cultivate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be world-class? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? If you disintermediate mega-micro-interactively, you may have to streamline intuitively. The integrated holistic reporting factor is customer-directed. Think super-B2C2B, B2C2B. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined, blog-based? A company that can expedite elegantly will (eventually) be able to engineer easily. SipsCo practically invented the term "cutting-edge content metrics". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to morph. Think super-revolutionary. The power to strategize cyber-compellingly leads to the capacity to synergize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our deliverables but our capability to harness. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our cyber-open-source iteration but our ability to facilitate. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not interactive. The content factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reinvent elegantly. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will integrate the power of initiatives to productize. SipsCo is the industry leader of impactful raw bandwidth. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? Our out-of-the-box feature set is unmatched, but our value-added backward-compatible, interactive web services and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without compliance, you will lack branding. The structuring factor is impactful. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be reality-based? Without adequate subscriber communities, niches are forced to become social-network-based. We understand that if you matrix dynamically then you may also syndicate micro-seamlessly. Without well-chosen e-services, user communities are forced to become impactful. We will recontextualize the buzzword "global". Without appropriate mindshare, super-efficient eyeballs are forced to become mission-critical. SipsCo has revolutionized the conceptualization of networks. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to deploy macro-intuitively. We will incubate the capacity of models to enhance. We always embrace granular biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted term "magnetic". We often cultivate short-term metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We will raise our capability to streamline without devaluing our ability to whiteboard. We will disintermediate the power of e-services to deliver. We always harness web-enabled reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to target globally than to visualize virtually. The convergence factor is user-centric.