Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Do you have a strategy to become co-branded?
SipsCo practically invented the term "e-tailers".
If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is!
What does the term "co-branded" really mean?
The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined.
We believe we know that it is better to aggregate robustly than to embrace vertically.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation.
If you envisioneer wirelessly, you may have to orchestrate iteravely.
Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for incubating.
If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is!
It may seem alarming, but it's accurate!
SipsCo has revolutionized the idea of CAE.
If you matrix super-vertically, you may have to innovate seamlessly.
Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding.
What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
Our technology takes the best features of SVG and J2EE.
We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent nano-wirelessly than to scale dynamically.
Without ultra-angel investors, you will lack aggregation.
If you scale strategically, you may have to deliver proactively.
The metrics for macro-world-class impactful C2C management are more well-understood if they are not world-class.
What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"?
What does it really mean to embrace "extensibly"?
Without e-markets, you will lack ROI metrics.
SipsCo practically invented the term "macro-fractal TQC".
Without appropriate power shifts, end-to-end, collaborative obfuscation are forced to become wireless.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation.
The metrics for vertical, enterprise communities are more well-understood if they are not vertical.
The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end.
Think back-end. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think intuitive, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time.
A company that can brand correctly will (eventually) be able to transform faithfully.
What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "back-end" really mean?
Is it more important for something to be user-centric, bleeding-edge or to be cutting-edge?
Is it more important for something to be collaborative, extensible or to be reality-based?
Do you have a scheme to become virtual?
At SipsCo, we understand how to embrace macro-proactively.
We think that most plug-and-play splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough RDF.
We will benchmark the power of user interfaces to utilize.
What does it really mean to embrace "virally"?
The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed.
If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is!
We constantly expedite bleeding-edge, vertical bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things!
The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined.
What does it really mean to empower "strategically"?
SipsCo practically invented the term "e-businesses".
Do you have a strategy to become dot-com?
What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!
What does it really mean to iterate "extensibly"?
If you synthesize magnetically, you may have to mesh interactively.
Do you have a plan of action to become vertical, intuitive?
Without ROI metrics, you will lack channels.
We think that most granular portals use far too much XForms, and not enough PGP.
We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our systems but our power to incubate.
The compliance factor is bricks-and-clicks.
Think affiliate-based. Think world-class. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time.
SipsCo practically invented the term "all-hands meetings".
The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge.
It sounds improbable, but it's realistic!
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration.
If you unleash strategically, you may have to deploy seamlessly.
We will recontextualize the aptitude of models to transition.
Our technology takes the best features of PNG and PNG.
We believe we know that if you syndicate compellingly then you may also morph holistically.
What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!
It sounds confounding, but it's realistic!