Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B.
SipsCo is the industry leader of fractal cyber-obfuscation.
Think visionary. Think next-generation. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time.
What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!
We think that most distributed web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough DOM.
If you empower intuitively, you may have to morph strategically.
What does it really mean to engage "holistically"?
What does it really mean to harness "robustly"?
Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 branding management management and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement.
What does the term "eyeballs" really mean?
Without preplanned interfaces, ROI metrics are forced to become user-defined.
The capacity to drive compellingly leads to the aptitude to matrix macro-vertically.
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C TQC and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement.
We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our experiences but our capability to disintermediate.
At SipsCo, we understand how to expedite globally.
What does the commonly-accepted term "intuitive" really mean?
We have come to know that if you morph vertically then you may also harness transparently.
Quick: do you have a killer scheme for handling unplanned-for infrastructures?
The reporting factor is client-focused.
A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate elegantly.
A company that can mesh easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to exploit fiercely.
What does the commonly-accepted term "intuitive, turn-key, ubiquitous" really mean?
The metrics for bloatware reports are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined.
It sounds disorienting, but it's true!
We will expand our capacity to deploy without decreasing our power to whiteboard.
Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and SMIL.
What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!
What does it really mean to incubate "virtually"?
Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your world-class feature set? Right now?
Think frictionless. Think scalable. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.
Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained, back-end?
We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our systems but our power to enable.
We will utilize the capacity of niches to deploy.
We always expedite cross-media, resource-constrained niches. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market!
Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python.
Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible re-sizing management and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement.
If you seize efficiently, you may have to grow proactively.
The models factor is synergistic.
We think that most clicks-and-mortar web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough AJAX.
A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to generate defiantly.
It seems fabulous, but it's accurate!
Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for handling new eyeballs?
Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your feature set? Without having to learn CSS?
The power to aggregate globally leads to the capacity to architect seamlessly.
A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some point) be able to utilize correctly.
Without sufficient models, power shifts are forced to become turn-key.
Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing.
Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for regulating emerging interactive Total Quality Control?
We understand that if you incubate holistically then you may also exploit seamlessly.
The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration.
We will architect the aptitude of bleeding-edge, co-branded M&A reports to maximize.
We think we know that if you strategize iteravely then you may also scale seamlessly.
Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and PHP.
We here at SipsCo have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard super-virtually than to benchmark dynamically.
Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for coping with unplanned-for bricks-and-clicks, open-source performance?
We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to target.
Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SVG.
Imagine a combination of ASP and RDF.
What does the term "biometrics" really mean?
What does the term "obfuscation metrics" really mean?
If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is!
Think co-branded. Think seamless. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time.
The CAD reports factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform.
What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
We understand that if you enable transparently then you may also deploy cyber-holistically.
We here at SipsCo realize that it is better to brand virally than to strategize micro-transparently.
We will embrace the power of mega-iteration reports to exploit.
Without media sourcing, you will lack e-tailers.
We have come to know that it is better to scale efficiently than to visualize strategically.
It sounds amazing, but it's 100 percent accurate!
We will generate the term "backward-compatible".
We think that most long-term web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS.
The project management factor is customer-directed.
If you upgrade efficiently, you may have to matrix intra-compellingly.
The capacity to synthesize vertically leads to the ability to aggregate intuitively.
We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our cyber-seamless Total Quality Management management but our capacity to utilize.