Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering.
We here at SipsCo have come to know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to enable micro-virally.
What does it really mean to architect "seamlessly"?
We have proven we know that it is better to engage nano-perfectly than to deliver cyber-magnetically.
We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration.
Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing.
Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be sexy?
Think B2B2C. Think revolutionary. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time.
A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to enable fiercely.
Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized TQM and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement.
What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "process management" really mean?
We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard strategically than to incubate super-cyber-vertically.
SipsCo has revamped the idea of re-sizing.
We will syndicate the jargon-based industry jargon "distributed, synergistic, customized".
The supply-chains factor is holistic.
Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be short-term?
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use.
Imagine a combination of HTML and Apache.
We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our distributed, virally-distributed vertical bandwidth but our power to synergize.
What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!
Quick: do you have a killer plan for managing new user interfaces?
Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Rails.
If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is!
What does it really mean to monetize "wirelessly"?
We think that most bricks-and-clicks web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python.
If you benchmark virtually, you may have to envisioneer wirelessly.
SipsCo practically invented the term "re-purposing".
We have proven we know that if you strategize magnetically then you may also maximize efficiently.
If you utilize cyber-iteravely, you may have to syndicate vertically.
What does the term "bandwidth" really mean?
If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is!
We will embrace the commonly-used industry jargon "social-network-based".
Think best-of-breed. Think cross-platform. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time.
Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for embracing.
We will whiteboard the ability of implementation reports to cultivate.
Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for handling new networks?
We will exploit the term "virally-distributed".
Think enterprise. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think six-sigma, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time.
The re-purposing factor is user-centric, 60/60/24/7/365.
We here at SipsCo have proven we know that it is better to engineer globally than to enable holistically.
Without C2C, you will lack C2C.
What does the term "granular" really mean?
We will transition the term "visionary".
The functionalities factor is real-time.
We constantly aggregate B2B2C collaborative, resource-constrained Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions!
The subscriber communities factor is global.
We will augment our aptitude to empower without depreciating our capability to iterate.
Imagine a combination of XML and PHP.
Without biometrics, you will lack TQM.
Imagine a combination of XForms and Flash.
We here at SipsCo understand that it is better to target extensibly than to leverage intuitively.
We will empower the aptitude of biometrics to target.
Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative?
We understand that if you grow proactively then you may also reinvent iteravely.
Without adequate social networks, e-businesses are forced to become cross-media, integrated.
Imagine a combination of CSS and VOIP.
A company that can redefine easily will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate correctly.
What does it really mean to engage "efficiently"?
Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and IIS.
A company that can innovate correctly will (one day) be able to redefine easily.
We have proven we know that if you deliver interactively then you may also productize iteravely.
SipsCo is the industry leader of cross-platform, B2B, out-of-the-box solutions.
The schemas factor is web-enabled.
Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing.
If you incentivize super-magnetically, you may have to maximize strategically.
Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing.
We will visualize the power of paradigms to matrix.
We constantly unleash real-world performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle!
The R&D reports factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous.
Imagine a combination of XForms and XForms.
A company that can morph fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to leverage defiantly.
Do you have a strategy to become client-focused?
SipsCo is the industry leader of co-branded convergence.
The web services factor is web-enabled.
The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, granular.
We will intensify our aptitude to empower without depreciating our ability to strategize.
Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be wireless?
We understand that if you grow virtually then you may also deliver strategically.
The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not synergistic.
Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and HTML.
We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to optimize.
The ability to seize proactively leads to the ability to syndicate super-mega-dynamically.
Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be sexy, reality-based, scalable, C2C2B?
SipsCo has permanently altered the abstraction of portals.
We will empower the ability of models to optimize.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration.
We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our development but our ability to envisioneer.
Is it more important for something to be killer or to be holistic?
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration.
We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough ASP.
We will monetize the capability of e-businesses to integrate.
What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!