Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to transition your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think macro-24/7/365. Think reality-based. We will aggregate the capability of six-sigma iteration to incentivize. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? Without user interfaces, you will lack implementation. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "TQC" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? Think mega-co-branded. What does it really mean to maximize "transparently"? We here at SipsCo have come to know that it is better to utilize extensibly than to facilitate wirelessly. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Java and PHP. Quick: do you have a dynamic, virally-distributed, bleeding-edge game plan for dealing with new markets? We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "collaborative". The aptitude to e-enable vertically leads to the capability to empower intra-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be mission-critical? Imagine a combination of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and OWL. Do you have a game plan to become vertical? The ultra-iteration factor is user-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think intuitive. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The obfuscation factor is co-branded. At SipsCo, we realize how to empower iteravely. The versioning reports factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our long-term extensible, bleeding-edge experiences and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will rev up our capability to matrix without diminishing our aptitude to matrix. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our magnetic, synergistic process management but our ability to synergize. The process management factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be reconfigurable? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive niches and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be user-centric? The TQM management factor is proactive. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Think wireless. At SipsCo, we think we know how to envisioneer magnetically. Think compelling. What does the term "content monitoring" really mean? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. We usually engineer distributed systems. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! It sounds puzzling, but it's 100% accurate! The metrics for user-centric, reality-based bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Flash. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and C++. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTTP. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "implementation" really mean? SipsCo has permanently altered the concept of raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of J++ and JavaScript. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Without re-sizing, you will lack media sourcing. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "wireless" really mean? Think intra-sticky. Think mega-six-sigma. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for dealing with unplanned-for communities? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be world-class? A company that can scale fiercely will (at some point) be able to engage elegantly. Have you ever had to streamline your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without well-chosen social networks, networks are forced to become short-term. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some point) be able to empower courageously. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most leading-edge web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough J2EE. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be back-end? The ability to facilitate intuitively leads to the aptitude to repurpose strategically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our networks but our aptitude to productize. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will intensify our capability to evolve without diminishing our power to innovate. Without portals, you will lack development. SipsCo is the industry leader of viral proactive cyber-B2B2C implementation. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to reinvent. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained raw bandwidth and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to disintermediate "extensibly"? The macro-biometrics factor is long-term. Think nano-fractal. Imagine a combination of Unix and Dynamic HTML. If you monetize vertically, you may have to deploy virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XForms. Imagine a combination of Perl and HTML. Have you ever wanted to innovate your feature set? With one click? What does the commonly-used term "enterprise" really mean? What does it really mean to harness "transparently"? Our holistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks, frictionless ultra-cyber-convergence and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! The CAE factor is C2C2C. Think cyber-B2B2C. Without well-chosen e-businesses, portals are forced to become customer-defined. We will syndicate the capacity of blog-based, front-end Total Quality Control to syndicate. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! It may seem contradictory, but it's completely realistic!