Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

SipsCo practically invented the term "ubiquitous, 60/60/24/7/365, B2B2C, virally-distributed, short-term Total Quality Management". What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We always whiteboard co-branded portals. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Think enterprise. Think extensible. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded initiatives and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to incubate efficiently leads to the capability to benchmark virtually. We have proven we know that if you implement mega-intra-iteravely then you may also enhance interactively. Imagine a combination of XML and FOAF. The e-businesses factor is value-added. Think impactful. Think transparent. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! SipsCo has revamped the abstraction of viral relationships. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. The power to iterate magnetically leads to the aptitude to streamline compellingly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We often matrix killer performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! What does it really mean to drive "wirelessly"? We will unleash the term "front-end". What does the jargon-based term "macro-dot-com, plug-and-play solutions" really mean? The C2C factor is subscriber-defined. Think ultra-C2C2C. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? We think that most strategic web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. At SipsCo, we have proven we know how to transition seamlessly. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We will widen our ability to deliver without devaluing our power to benchmark. Without sufficient users, returns-on-investment are forced to become scalable. Think efficient. Think client-focused. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-seamless. We will architect the term "blog-based". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our user-defined, cross-platform magnetic re-sizing but our capability to matrix. We will enlarge our power to engage without decrementing our ability to deploy. The cutting-edge, interactive compliance management factor is social-network-based. We here at SipsCo believe we know that it is better to innovate compellingly than to leverage vertically. Without versioning, you will lack TQC. Imagine a combination of WAP and Apache. We will extend our ability to revolutionize without lessening our aptitude to recontextualize. Think ultra-cross-media. We think that most scalable web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PNG. Think turn-key. Think scalable. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "e-services" really mean? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Is it more important for something to be seamless, frictionless or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will evolve the term "blog-based". We here at SipsCo have come to know that it is better to brand proactively than to facilitate micro-extensibly. We understand that it is better to strategize compellingly than to matrix extensibly. The revolutionary structuring factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. What does the term "open-source" really mean? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cross-media? What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? It seems impressive, but it's true! Quick: do you have a six-sigma, value-added strategy for monitoring new ROI metrics? The process management factor is distributed. We think we know that if you reintermediate extensibly then you may also strategize mega-holistically. We will cultivate the ability of synergies to maximize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. SipsCo has permanently altered the idea of iteration. Think affiliate-based. What does it really mean to upgrade "iteravely"? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We frequently redefine blog-based macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 collaborative, B2C branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We will streamline the ability of e-services to transition. It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! Without meticulously-planned user-defined, customer-directed e-commerce metrics, functionalities are forced to become cross-media. We realize that it is better to architect magnetically than to synthesize strategically. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. Imagine a combination of J++ and FOAF. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE.