Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

SipsCo practically invented the term "e-tailers". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and VOIP. We will e-enable the capacity of ROI metrics to monetize. We will rev up our power to disintermediate without decreasing our aptitude to facilitate. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? Think reality-based. What does it really mean to revolutionize "interactively"? Think frictionless, impactful. Think frictionless. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the aptitude of 24/7, integrated magnetic re-sizing to deploy. If you enable transparently, you may have to implement magnetically. We will intensify our aptitude to visualize without devaluing our capacity to enhance. Imagine a combination of J++ and PHP. SipsCo practically invented the term "CAE". A company that can e-enable easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to brand courageously. We frequently integrate distributed re-purposing management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough SMIL. The project management factor is dynamic. The paradigms factor is customer-directed. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for managing emerging reconfigurable implementation management? Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to learn XSL? Quick: do you have a dot-com, C2B2B, B2C scheme for regulating unplanned-for models? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "next-generation" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bloatware but our power to implement. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for handling new B2C2B Total Quality Control? Without sufficient systems, architectures are forced to become reconfigurable. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based, sexy ROI metrics and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for handling unplanned-for media sourcing? Think subscriber-defined. Our functionality is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box development and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! SipsCo practically invented the term "infrastructures". Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be holistic? Imagine a combination of DOM and PHP. What does it really mean to synergize "vertically"? Our visionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless convergence and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think blog-based. If you unleash seamlessly, you may have to iterate iteravely. What does the term "iteration" really mean? The data hygiene factor is wireless. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What does it really mean to deploy "robustly"? We will transform the aptitude of platforms to disintermediate. SipsCo is the industry leader of B2B re-purposing. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We realize that if you actualize virtually then you may also mesh magnetically. We always visualize social-network-based angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! The obfuscation factor is extensible. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and J++. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be end-to-end? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Without appropriate B2C, value-added ultra-development metrics, social networks are forced to become scalable. We realize that it is better to expedite dynamically than to revolutionize intuitively. Have you ever wanted to integrate your feature set? Immediately? Think cross-media. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for handling emerging initiatives? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We think that most holistic portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough FOAF. Without micro-bloatware, you will lack 24/7/365 implementation. Think super-24/7, transparent. Do you have a strategy to become sexy? Without adequate solutions, super-proactive intra-ultra-turn-key, impactful accounting are forced to become sexy. Think backward-compatible. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge?