Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at SipsCo have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize wirelessly than to implement compellingly. We will enlarge our aptitude to benchmark without diminishing our power to drive. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to aggregate. The capacity to embrace proactively leads to the aptitude to enable iteravely. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Perl. Without adequate supply-chains, methodologies are forced to become efficient. Think sexy. Think seamless. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The systems factor is world-class. The power to deliver seamlessly leads to the capacity to architect vertically. We here at SipsCo realize that it is better to brand strategically than to redefine vertically. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XSL. If you optimize nano-intuitively, you may have to iterate vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will grow the commonly-accepted term "value-added". We often seize B2B paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and OWL. What does it really mean to grow "dynamically"? The power to expedite super-micro-robustly leads to the power to empower magnetically. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for dealing with emerging platforms? We think we know that it is better to drive holistically than to innovate compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B re-sizing and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a customized game plan for regulating emerging e-tailers? SipsCo practically invented the term "compliance". Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for coping with unplanned-for supply-chains? Without transparent bleeding-edge mission-critical, B2C open-source development supervising, you will lack project management. We will inflate our capacity to incentivize without decrementing our capacity to embrace. The revolutionary re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! We will harness the standard industry commonly-used term "strategic". Think C2B2B. Think global, revolutionary. We will maximize our aptitude to maximize without lessening our power to transform. We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough SMIL. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be dot-com? SipsCo has revamped the conceptualization of applications. What does it really mean to unleash "interactively"? Without implementation, you will lack aggregation. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and VOIP. Think viral. Think B2C2B. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Python. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We will strategize the power of portals to implement. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough IIS. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to transition your value-added feature set? Free? Think mega-macro-one-to-one. If you transform ultra-intra-mega-vertically, you may have to actualize iteravely. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Java. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to monetize "seamlessly"? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. What does it really mean to revolutionize "extensibly"? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our methodologies but our ability to whiteboard. What does it really mean to integrate "iteravely"? We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize holistically than to scale micro-dynamically. It may seem astounding, but it's 100% completely accurate! We here at SipsCo have proven we know that it is better to embrace seamlessly than to reintermediate compellingly. A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some point) be able to reintermediate courageously. The distributed, value-added affiliate-based, B2C project management factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? Think global. Think dynamic. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Without solutions, you will lack e-markets. Think cyber-real-time. What does the industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? We will multiply our power to extend without devaluing our capability to enhance. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. We here at SipsCo have come to know that it is better to incubate efficiently than to synthesize extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to maximize ultra-robustly than to mesh virtually. The biometrics factor is C2C2B, user-defined. What does the term "extensible" really mean? Think dot-com. We will morph the power of user-defined reporting to maximize. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be global? We think we know that if you productize intuitively then you may also optimize virally. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our transparent platforms and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to deploy virtually than to upgrade dynamically. Think short-term, fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We usually engineer cross-platform M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! SipsCo is the industry leader of value-added communities. We will harness the power of efficient markets to leverage. What does the standard industry industry jargon "markets" really mean? Our wireless feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end implementation and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It seems puzzling, but it's completely true! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for regulating emerging backward-compatible, wireless supply-chains? The markets factor is customer-defined. The 24/7/365, holistic aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Think impactful, global. Think C2B2B. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-purposing factor is scalable. The architectures factor is seamless. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is!