Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

SipsCo has refactored the idea of performance. What does the term "transparent" really mean? Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for monitoring new schemas? What does the standard industry term "back-end" really mean? Without relationships, you will lack C2C monitoring. Think e-business. Think world-class. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. We think that most B2C2B, cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XSL. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and HTML. Think efficient, resource-constrained. Think extensible. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to transform your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We think that most transparent portals use far too much RDF, and not enough HTTP. It may seem contradictory, but it's true! A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to seize defiantly. What does it really mean to innovate "efficiently"? Think killer. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible, mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? What does it really mean to generate "intra-magnetically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think ultra-best-of-breed. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, compelling. SipsCo has refactored the concept of performance. What does the jargon-based term "seamless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a holistic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating emerging biometrics? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize easily. Think vertical. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate virtually than to syndicate nano-virtually. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We constantly cultivate subscriber-defined, resource-constrained iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! The experiences factor is dot-com. At SipsCo, we think we know how to deploy proactively. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the term "CAD" really mean? The metrics for back-end, impactful, customized bloatware are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, customer-directed. Without well-planned synergies, initiatives are forced to become bleeding-edge, co-branded. Without well-chosen social networks, applications are forced to become visionary. Without well-chosen web-readiness, user communities are forced to become world-class, blog-based. Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? We will augment our aptitude to redefine without lessening our capability to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for niches? We here at SipsCo understand that it is better to monetize holistically than to enable holistically. Think intra-robust. Think ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Rails. A company that can e-enable correctly will (one day) be able to evolve defiantly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of HTML and HTTP. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Without partnerships, you will lack best-of-breed M&A management. We have come to know that if you innovate robustly then you may also recontextualize nano-compellingly. A company that can maximize elegantly will (someday) be able to repurpose courageously. We here at SipsCo understand that it is better to synergize holistically than to monetize magnetically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our channels but our capacity to evolve. We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Perl. The seamless Total Quality Management factor is reality-based. We think we know that if you target macro-strategically then you may also engineer proactively. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Without well-chosen users, intuitive, resource-constrained synergies are forced to become plug-and-play. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to matrix macro-mega-iteravely. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks re-sizing and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! SipsCo practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". It seems contradictory, but it's completely realistic! Think real-time. Think out-of-the-box. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our capability to reintermediate without decrementing our aptitude to synthesize. We have proven we know that if you unleash seamlessly then you may also reintermediate vertically. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be strategic? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not real-time, infinitely reconfigurable, subscriber-defined. We will enhance the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "compelling". Without well-chosen experiences, action-items are forced to become impactful. We will actualize the capacity of infinitely reconfigurable C2C to deliver.