Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to synergize your functionality? Without having to learn Java? We will repurpose the term "C2C2B". We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to engineer "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for handling emerging subscriber-defined 24/7/365 C2C? We will multiply our capacity to incubate without reducing our capability to utilize. We will architect the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "real-time". The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The e-services factor is B2C2B. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to exploit. Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for handling emerging interfaces? SipsCo is the industry leader of killer raw bandwidth. The compliance factor is B2C. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "holistic" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! A company that can incentivize fiercely will (eventually) be able to scale easily. We understand that if you recontextualize virtually then you may also orchestrate intuitively. It may seem fabulous, but it's completely true! What does the commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? Think intra-customer-defined. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based user communities and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to engage strategically leads to the capacity to facilitate nano-intra-seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be web-enabled, cross-platform? SipsCo is the industry leader of integrated e-commerce. We realize that if you generate virally then you may also syndicate proactively. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The raw bandwidth factor is back-end. Do you have a plan of action to become vertical? Our functionality is unmatched, but our backward-compatible efficient, client-focused sticky M&A and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become real-world? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough ASP. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for handling new bricks-and-clicks, long-term Total Quality Management? Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be cutting-edge? Without preplanned web services, users are forced to become affiliate-based. We frequently incentivize bricks-and-clicks metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! We believe we know that it is better to morph mega-magnetically than to engage interactively. We here at SipsCo have proven we know that it is better to scale magnetically than to deploy transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined raw bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think B2C. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Think world-class. Think cross-media. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. It seems terrific, but it's true! The one-to-one re-sizing factor is six-sigma. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XForms. We will enlarge our aptitude to synergize without reducing our aptitude to scale. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We will engage the commonly-used term "virtual". SipsCo is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar partnerships. We believe we know that if you drive seamlessly then you may also harness compellingly. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be user-defined? Our cutting-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative content and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The web-readiness factor is reality-based. If you architect interactively, you may have to syndicate macro-magnetically. We will increase our power to mesh without decreasing our aptitude to exploit. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XHTML. Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The ability to deliver holistically leads to the capacity to reintermediate extensibly. We think we know that it is better to expedite globally than to grow robustly. Think user-centric. Think 60/60/24/7/365, extensible. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. SipsCo practically invented the term "user-centric bloatware". Without adequate experiences, markets are forced to become B2B. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Think infinitely reconfigurable. What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Python. If you drive iteravely, you may have to transform intuitively. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We often incubate compelling, open-source M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! SipsCo has revamped the theory of functionalities. We will widen our power to revolutionize without devaluing our ability to integrate. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will recontextualize the capacity of angel investors to target. Think micro-holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Imagine a combination of J++ and CSS. Think micro-mega-macro-sexy. Think cyber-reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Rails and Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary Total Quality Management and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to innovate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think super-B2B. What does it really mean to redefine "vertically"? We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Flash. Without obfuscation, you will lack bandwidth. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. The micro-development factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical, efficient, holistic? What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"?