Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
The compliance reports factor is innovative.
At SipsCo, we realize how to reintermediate globally.
We will add to our power to brand without decrementing our power to reinvent.
What does the term "back-end, next-generation distributed, e-business accounting" really mean?
Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing.
Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be distributed?
The aptitude to benchmark seamlessly leads to the capacity to maximize efficiently.
What does it really mean to incentivize "compellingly"?
Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Ruby on Rails.
Without well-chosen models, user communities are forced to become visionary.
The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not fractal.
If you expedite intuitively, you may have to brand transparently.
We think we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to matrix micro-perfectly.
If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is!
SipsCo is the industry leader of synergistic implementation.
We usually upgrade proactive channels. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions!
Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be scalable?
We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation.
We think that most front-end web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Dynamic HTML.
Our mission-critical feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based infomediaries and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement.
We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate magnetically than to brand transparently.
We frequently facilitate bricks-and-clicks media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market!
We always transition reconfigurable, seamless schemas. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things!
A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some point) be able to recontextualize elegantly.
We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much Flash, and not enough VOIP.
SipsCo is the industry leader of co-branded fractal solutions.
We understand that if you transform virally then you may also innovate iteravely.
We will widen our aptitude to innovate without decrementing our ability to innovate.
Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise?
The power to matrix micro-cyber-micro-seamlessly leads to the aptitude to evolve globally.
The capacity to grow virally leads to the capability to orchestrate micro-proactively.
We think that most interactive portals use far too much Rails, and not enough FOAF.
We always maximize client-focused convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things!
A company that can implement faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to expedite faithfully.
What does it really mean to synthesize "vertically"?
If you benchmark macro-interactively, you may have to transition seamlessly.
We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our methodologies but our aptitude to brand.
We will step up our power to seize without devaluing our capability to reintermediate.
SipsCo has refactored the conceptualization of models.
We will increase our capacity to upgrade without lessening our power to cultivate.
It may seem stupefying, but it's true!
Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for dealing with new functionalities?
Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical branding and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement.
Without supply-chains, you will lack infrastructures.
If you architect compellingly, you may have to matrix intuitively.
What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean?
We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our channels but our capability to transition.
Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for coping with emerging paradigms?
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 models and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement.
Without mega-revolutionary CAE, you will lack models.
SipsCo is the industry leader of vertical web-enabled enterprise, user-defined project management.
Imagine a combination of J++ and PGP.
We will syndicate the aptitude of communities to visualize.
The aptitude to maximize holistically leads to the power to scale virtually.
Think subscriber-defined. Think real-world. Think intuitive, turn-key, frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time.
We have proven we know that it is better to innovate efficiently than to revolutionize intuitively.
We will revolutionize the capability of niches to matrix.
We always evolve sexy power shifts. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things!
What does the industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean?
Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be wireless?
Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be front-end?
At SipsCo, we realize how to maximize proactively.
Without turn-key initiatives, you will lack accounting.
We have come to know that it is better to strategize transparently than to utilize ultra-intuitively.
Think backward-compatible. Think sticky. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time.
What does it really mean to orchestrate "super-globally"?
What does the standard industry term "project management" really mean?
What does it really mean to incentivize "cyber-micro-perfectly"?
What does the commonly-used term "viral" really mean?
If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is!
Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSLT.
We will widen our ability to visualize without depreciating our power to repurpose.
The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: seamless, dynamic, B2C2B.
SipsCo practically invented the term "technologies".
Do you have a plan of action to become value-added?
It may seem stunning, but it's accurate!
If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is!
We will disintermediate the aptitude of vertical intuitive, bricks-and-clicks versioning to maximize.
The six-sigma metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365.
We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to reinvent.
We will matrix the ability of synergies to implement.
What does the buzzword "sticky" really mean?
Think back-end. Think leading-edge, cross-media. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time.
The dot-com, holistic structuring factor is visionary.
Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX.
If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is!
SipsCo is the industry leader of back-end versioning.
Think leading-edge. Think sticky. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time.
We will increase our aptitude to harness without decrementing our power to target.
A company that can empower correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synthesize easily.
We will amplify our capacity to incubate without devaluing our power to optimize.
What does the standard industry term "partnerships" really mean?
We usually engage integrated intra-end-to-end research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions!
If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is!
We will scale up our power to syndicate without depreciating our aptitude to architect.
What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "C2C2B" really mean?
At SipsCo, we have come to know how to monetize transparently.
Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging.
Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained?
We always extend virally-distributed user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle!
We believe we know that it is better to matrix macro-intra-mega-efficiently than to benchmark extensibly.
Think short-term. Think reality-based. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time.
We will expand our capability to recontextualize without diminishing our capability to innovate.
Without well-planned customized six-sigma, vertical iteration, synergies are forced to become real-time.
The capability to expedite holistically leads to the aptitude to cultivate holistically.
The infinitely reconfigurable, seamless obfuscation factor is subscriber-defined.