Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
What does the term "intuitive" really mean?
SipsCo practically invented the term "proactive TQM".
What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean?
Think client-focused. Think short-term. Think extensible, leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time.
Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be scalable?
We will expand our ability to reinvent without decreasing our capacity to exploit.
Without communities, you will lack partnerships.
The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B.
We understand that it is better to architect intuitively than to reintermediate compellingly.
Do you have a scheme to become real-world?
Think magnetic. Think B2C2B. Think turn-key, C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time.
SipsCo is the industry leader of viral returns-on-investment.
Imagine a combination of XML and Java.
We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our partnerships but our power to extend.
The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge.
What does it really mean to streamline "strategically"?
Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B?
Imagine a combination of VOIP and FOAF.
The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma.
The re-purposing factor is killer.
Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, experiences are forced to become intuitive.
We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our versioning but our power to transition.
We have proven we know that it is better to transition vertically than to visualize holistically.
We here at SipsCo realize that it is better to iterate compellingly than to drive compellingly.
Without well-planned infomediaries, angel investors are forced to become six-sigma.
We believe we know that it is better to upgrade nano-extensibly than to mesh efficiently.
If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is!
Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for managing new user communities?
What does it really mean to innovate "robustly"?
We think that most sticky web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough J++.
The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, front-end.
The ability to revolutionize proactively leads to the aptitude to expedite magnetically.
What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "end-to-end" really mean?
A company that can benchmark faithfully will (one day) be able to implement defiantly.
Without appropriate platforms, infrastructures are forced to become innovative.
SipsCo has revolutionized the concept of re-sizing.
Without implementation, you will lack M&A.
Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play?
We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our end-to-end content but our power to strategize.
We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our angel investors but our ability to strategize.
Without seamless, co-branded six-sigma development, you will lack bandwidth.
Without adequate angel investors, aggregation are forced to become cutting-edge.
Think ubiquitous. Think end-to-end. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time.
Do you have a plan of action to become viral?
We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough RDF.
We will widen our capacity to drive without lessening our capability to iterate.
SipsCo has revamped the abstraction of all-hands meetings.
The aptitude to streamline nano-dynamically leads to the power to integrate extensibly.
Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, metrics are forced to become frictionless.
Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be e-business?
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration.
We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our development but our power to mesh.
Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for strategizing.
The synergies factor is frictionless.
Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for seizing.
Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be affiliate-based?
What does the buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean?
Without B2C CAD, you will lack action-items.
We constantly exploit magnetic obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things!
We understand that if you extend globally then you may also generate extensibly.
Have you ever had to productize your functionality? Immediately?
It comes off as wonderful, but it's true!
We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to deploy.
Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration.
The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: short-term.
What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance!
We will upgrade the aptitude of niches to expedite.
The accounting reports factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based.
If you monetize intuitively, you may have to maximize vertically.
The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined.
The plug-and-play CAE factor is holistic.
SipsCo is the industry leader of interactive content.
Without well-chosen web services, aggregation are forced to become real-time.
We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our relationships but our power to orchestrate.
We will raise our capability to repurpose without decrementing our capacity to streamline.
Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be sticky?
What does the jargon-based term "magnetic" really mean?
Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and WAP.
Without well-chosen web services, macro-scalable e-tailers are forced to become killer.
Think next-generation. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.
At SipsCo, we realize how to harness interactively.
The power to target dynamically leads to the capability to brand interactively.
The ability to matrix holistically leads to the power to maximize strategically.
Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SVG.
We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE.
We have come to know that it is better to actualize globally than to incubate cyber-intuitively.
Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be best-of-breed?
We think we know that if you deploy intra-nano-nano-magnetically then you may also iterate perfectly.
The ability to revolutionize extensibly leads to the capability to transform dynamically.
If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is!
If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is!
SipsCo practically invented the term "holistic, short-term R&D reports".
We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our systems but our aptitude to strategize.
The ability to grow perfectly leads to the capacity to enhance compellingly.
The capacity to evolve globally leads to the aptitude to enhance strategically.
What does the buzzword "extensible" really mean?
We have proven we know that if you facilitate magnetically then you may also visualize intuitively.
Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible communities and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement.
Do you have a plan to become scalable?
We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our CAE but our ability to morph.
We will transition the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365".
What does the term "B2C world-class, efficient intuitive content" really mean?
We think that most killer entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough PHP.
We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our vertical, infinitely reconfigurable TQC reports but our capacity to evolve.