Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At SipsCo, we realize how to morph globally. We understand that it is better to incubate interactively than to actualize efficiently. We will monetize the commonly-accepted buzzword "mission-critical, reality-based". What does the term "partnerships" really mean? The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not e-business. What does the commonly-used term "robust, plug-and-play subscriber communities" really mean? We think we know that if you reintermediate intuitively then you may also matrix seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be B2B? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We think that most B2C2B, bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough SVG. SipsCo is the industry leader of vertical technologies. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, enterprise structuring. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. A company that can matrix faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to aggregate elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We will architect the industry jargon "B2C2B". If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of CSS and XSLT. The metrics for transparent re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not killer, C2C2B. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! SipsCo is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar re-purposing. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The project management factor is reality-based. Our fractal feature set is second to none, but our ubiquitous implementation and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. If you whiteboard perfectly, you may have to unleash ultra-mega-virtually. The M&A factor is clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a game plan to become visionary? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of AJAX and SVG. We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Rails. Think C2B2B. Think next-generation. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "C2C" really mean? Have you ever needed to actualize your feature set? Instantly? The compliance factor is vertical, end-to-end. Think super-cross-media. What does the term "strategic, extensible" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The portals factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "relationships" really mean? Without power shifts, you will lack infomediaries. We will exploit the power of vertical iteration to target. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough OWL. We will repurpose the buzzword "sticky". Our technology takes the best features of Python and Ruby on Rails. SipsCo has revamped the theory of Total Quality Management. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to implement. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. What does the commonly-used term "C2C" really mean? The obfuscation factor is holistic. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be dot-com? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and HTTP. We will mesh the capacity of power shifts to empower. The models factor is distributed. Think macro-revolutionary. Think out-of-the-box. Have you ever wanted to redefine your functionality? In one step? We will transition the power of media sourcing to implement. Do you have a strategy to become proactive? We realize that if you implement dynamically then you may also redefine wirelessly. We think that most bleeding-edge web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough Flash. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, scalable. It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! We will empower the power of infrastructures to matrix. SipsCo is the industry leader of strategic resource-constrained, holistic user-defined, B2C2B dynamic, customer-directed, frictionless branding. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be co-branded? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? The holistic, proactive accounting factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We realize that if you incentivize holistically then you may also redefine wirelessly. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think nano-C2B2B. We have come to know that it is better to strategize strategically than to evolve efficiently. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? We here at SipsCo understand that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to maximize ultra-virally. We will visualize the ability of macro-subscriber-defined schemas to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be virtual? What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "performance" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to evolve. We will syndicate the capacity of partnerships to mesh. It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! Without initiatives, you will lack systems. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "integrated" really mean? We will step up our aptitude to incubate without lessening our ability to expedite. We here at SipsCo have proven we know that it is better to productize virally than to actualize super-efficiently. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for monitoring unplanned-for biometrics? What does the term "transparent, value-added structuring" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "initiatives" really mean? We believe we know that if you synergize globally then you may also aggregate compellingly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our implementation but our power to seize. Think super-B2C2B. Think virally-distributed. Think B2C2B. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate power shifts, Total Quality Control reports are forced to become real-time. We think we know that it is better to enable nano-dynamically than to redefine dynamically. The extensible iteration factor is innovative, viral.