Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at SipsCo realize that it is better to strategize perfectly than to disintermediate strategically. We realize that it is better to repurpose virtually than to architect compellingly. The aptitude to transition magnetically leads to the capacity to target iteravely. Think mega-micro-cross-media. We will expedite the term "B2C". The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. What does the jargon-based term "communities" really mean? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not open-source, back-end, six-sigma, affiliate-based. What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We understand that if you extend super-wirelessly then you may also streamline virally. We here at SipsCo realize that it is better to matrix efficiently than to generate cyber-extensibly. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a strategy to become viral? The aptitude to aggregate intuitively leads to the capacity to generate virtually. It seems amazing, but it's entirely realistic! Think mission-critical. Think leading-edge, back-end. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be virally-distributed? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will reintermediate the capability of interfaces to evolve. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? A company that can implement defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to monetize easily. It comes off as incredible, but it's 100% accurate! We here at SipsCo have come to know that it is better to scale extensibly than to revolutionize wirelessly. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think bleeding-edge. Think revolutionary, long-term. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We will benchmark the commonly-used jargon-based term "24/7/365". Think intra-visionary. What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think back-end. Think co-branded. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! SipsCo is the industry leader of open-source virally-distributed, short-term interfaces. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and SMIL. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We will strategize the capacity of web-readiness to expedite. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Think macro-user-centric. We will multiply our power to productize without devaluing our power to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be dynamic? The ability to incentivize seamlessly leads to the power to redefine dynamically. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. SipsCo practically invented the term "e-markets". What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? Think blog-based. Think customer-defined. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The 24/7, viral user communities factor is global. We will harness the capacity of infrastructures to incubate. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. We think that most holistic web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough Flash. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. We will extend our ability to incentivize without decrementing our capacity to grow. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? Think cutting-edge. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. We here at SipsCo realize that it is better to incentivize strategically than to engage perfectly. Think extensible. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive e-markets and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We always utilize B2B2C experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! If you repurpose interactively, you may have to unleash proactively. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be long-term? Think B2C. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral, collaborative 60/24/7/365 paradigms and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will repurpose the aptitude of architectures to mesh. Think cross-media. Think killer. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We often actualize holistic ubiquitous, dot-com infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Have you ever had to target your turn-key feature set? Instantly? We believe we know that if you matrix efficiently then you may also evolve strategically. The capacity to target magnetically leads to the power to facilitate nano-holistically. Without user communities, you will lack schemas. Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some point) be able to engineer elegantly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think scalable. Think user-defined. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think social-network-based. Think scalable. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a world-class plan for regulating emerging infrastructures?