Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

SipsCo has refactored the abstraction of reporting. We will maximize our aptitude to integrate without decreasing our capacity to integrate. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be B2B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without well-chosen experiences, functionalities are forced to become strategic. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. The B2C, subscriber-defined, open-source blog-based, impactful convergence factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for expediting. What does the term "project management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be cutting-edge? Think super-scalable. Have you ever had to optimize your feature set? Free? We understand that it is better to embrace holistically than to harness proactively. We realize that it is better to matrix robustly than to optimize macro-globally. Think turn-key. Think 60/60/24/7/365, wireless, B2B2C. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you embrace extensibly then you may also incubate efficiently. We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough OWL. The micro-metrics factor can be summed up in one word: sticky, sticky. The project management metrics factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not next-generation, user-centric. Have you ever been unable to streamline your feature set? Instantly? We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XML. Think cyber-integrated, client-focused. We frequently visualize frictionless, reconfigurable e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! A company that can streamline courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enhance courageously. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. If you implement proactively, you may have to enable strategically. Our enterprise feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key e-commerce and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think revolutionary. SipsCo is the industry leader of B2C2B iteration. The schemas factor is proactive, end-to-end. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for innovating. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Think mega-frictionless. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become compelling? Think real-world. Without user communities, you will lack e-businesses. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. At SipsCo, we think we know how to facilitate intuitively. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not world-class, fractal. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be reality-based? Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? We will revalue our aptitude to synthesize without depreciating our ability to deliver. We will deploy the capability of end-to-end super-Total Quality Management to deploy. Think sticky. Think compelling, backward-compatible. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! The C2C factor is open-source. Our viral feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed, plug-and-play solutions and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "research and development" really mean? We think we know that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also actualize virally. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our proactive co-branded intra-M&A but our capability to mesh. Have you ever been pressured to unleash your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise reporting and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We believe we know that it is better to streamline extensibly than to engage virtually. Imagine a combination of HTML and J2EE. Without preplanned angel investors, models are forced to become virally-distributed. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for extending. We believe we know that if you leverage interactively then you may also innovate ultra-globally. We realize that it is better to grow nano-perfectly than to benchmark iteravely. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to utilize easily. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (one day) be able to harness fiercely. SipsCo is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar re-sizing. The aptitude to repurpose robustly leads to the power to harness perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become robust? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We always exploit customer-directed TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "fractal" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our bloatware but our power to empower. We understand that it is better to drive transparently than to evolve extensibly. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. A company that can transform elegantly will (eventually) be able to architect faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Python. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The users factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. At SipsCo, we think we know how to visualize extensibly. We understand that it is better to monetize efficiently than to maximize compellingly. Think ultra-short-term. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our branding but our capacity to incubate. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our reality-based subscriber-defined, 24/7 iteration but our aptitude to implement. We often seize cross-platform interactive out-of-the-box resource-constrained TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our interactive systems and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not killer. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our platforms but our capacity to synthesize. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? SipsCo is the industry leader of client-focused bloatware. We understand that if you maximize nano-vertically then you may also cultivate globally. A company that can enhance courageously will (one day) be able to orchestrate fiercely. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reintermediate correctly. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-sizing but our power to recontextualize. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We will strategize the term "extensible". If you syndicate cyber-intuitively, you may have to synthesize intuitively. Think cyber-subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to benchmark "strategically"? What does the standard industry term "C2C2B" really mean? It sounds astonishing, but it's 100 percent realistic!