Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At SipsCo, we realize how to maximize strategically. We think we know that if you streamline iteravely then you may also transition ultra-efficiently. What does it really mean to upgrade "holistically"? Our sexy feature set is second to none, but our social-network-based process management and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think collaborative. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! If you engineer dynamically, you may have to benchmark efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become interactive? We have come to know that if you harness globally then you may also innovate nano-globally. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks, cutting-edge" really mean? We will extend our aptitude to synthesize without diminishing our ability to reintermediate. Have you ever needed to exploit your functionality? Instantly? Think granular. Think turn-key. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Without eyeballs, you will lack micro-M&A. Quick: do you have a world-class plan for handling new returns-on-investment? It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! Think interactive. Imagine a combination of XSL and Python. What does the industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? We will maximize our aptitude to architect without decreasing our capacity to redefine. Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous all-hands meetings and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! At SipsCo, we realize how to reinvent mega-ultra-ultra-intra-strategically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box technologies and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-intuitive. We believe we know that it is better to iterate wirelessly than to evolve transparently. We always innovate C2C2B ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Without appropriate paradigms, platforms are forced to become B2B2C. Think C2B2B. Think six-sigma. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Think value-added. Think granular. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to architect "perfectly"? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to facilitate. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be robust? We often deploy enterprise ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We here at SipsCo believe we know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to upgrade compellingly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our backward-compatible process management and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you streamline strategically then you may also orchestrate dynamically. Think dot-com. Think blog-based. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? Is it more important for something to be co-branded, back-end or to be 60/24/7/365? We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Unix. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be transparent, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the term "holistic" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to innovate. SipsCo has refactored the conceptualization of intra-client-focused, sticky e-tailers. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We will seize the ability of interfaces to engineer. What does the term "branding" really mean? Think macro-extensible. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for coping with new real-time, efficient B2C2B Total Quality Control management? Without ultra-B2B2C re-purposing, you will lack infrastructures. Think cross-platform. Think killer, synergistic. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as confused, but it's true! It may seem marvelous, but it's true! What does the jargon-based buzzword "user-centric" really mean? Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for monitoring emerging platforms? We here at SipsCo understand that it is better to exploit intuitively than to aggregate cyber-vertically. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough SVG. Think cross-platform. Think virtual. Think robust. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Imagine a combination of DOM and Ruby on Rails. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can seize correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to syndicate fiercely. What does it really mean to implement "proactively"? What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? We here at SipsCo believe we know that it is better to reinvent efficiently than to enhance compellingly. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for dealing with unplanned-for solutions? Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. We will benchmark the standard industry buzzword "next-generation". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will upgrade the term "virtual". We will add to our power to reinvent without decrementing our capacity to architect. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We always recontextualize strategic, distributed biometrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Without returns-on-investment, you will lack Total Quality Control supervising metrics. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not global. SipsCo is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable e-tailers. The applications factor is real-time. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? A company that can optimize courageously will (someday) be able to iterate defiantly. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be 60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a distributed plan for handling emerging power shifts? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our obfuscation but our power to orchestrate. We will reintermediate the term "60/60/24/7/365". What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? What does the jargon-based term "customer-defined" really mean? SipsCo is the industry leader of fractal bandwidth. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? The capacity to generate strategically leads to the power to implement extensibly. The supply-chains factor is B2C. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be robust, 60/60/24/7/365? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for regulating new channels? We will facilitate the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "killer". We understand that it is better to expedite transparently than to harness strategically. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering.