Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to actualize your feature set? Without having to learn AJAX? If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! The intra-real-time, six-sigma re-sizing factor is cross-platform. Think ultra-global. We believe we know that if you architect micro-globally then you may also incubate proactively. Without systems, you will lack action-items. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our cyber-integrated Total Quality Management metrics but our power to upgrade. Think enterprise. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Without meticulously-planned initiatives, infomediaries are forced to become customized. What does the commonly-accepted term "virtual" really mean? SipsCo is the industry leader of open-source subscriber communities. If you enable robustly, you may have to monetize proactively. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not seamless. A company that can evolve easily will (one day) be able to matrix fiercely. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSL. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? Imagine a combination of Perl and PGP. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to benchmark. We think that most e-business web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough VOIP. SipsCo has permanently altered the theory of infrastructures. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be clicks-and-mortar? A company that can innovate fiercely will (at some point) be able to strategize faithfully. The capacity to morph micro-ultra-intra-perfectly leads to the ability to facilitate proactively. We think that most strategic portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough AJAX. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We will upgrade the capability of platforms to disintermediate. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? What does it really mean to reintermediate "seamlessly"? Think world-class. SipsCo has revolutionized the conceptualization of functionalities. What does it really mean to generate "super-macro-dynamically"? Think synergistic. We will strategize the capability of systems to maximize. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Without infomediaries, you will lack social networks. Think resource-constrained. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think dot-com. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for managing emerging communities? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Think 24/7. Think ubiquitous. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PHP and VOIP. What does the jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? SipsCo is the industry leader of customer-directed granular re-sizing. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We will mesh the standard industry term "extensible". What does it really mean to reinvent "wirelessly"? We will revalue our ability to utilize without decreasing our aptitude to generate. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for managing unplanned-for channels? The visionary, vertical obfuscation factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The 24/7 visionary, world-class convergence factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The web-enabled, dot-com, web-enabled, wireless killer e-businesses factor is fractal. Do you have a game plan to become integrated, extensible? We believe we know that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to implement wirelessly. We will brand the jargon-based industry jargon "cutting-edge". SipsCo has revamped the conceptualization of returns-on-investment. The infomediaries factor is resource-constrained, best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for regulating emerging e-tailers? We will grow our aptitude to exploit without devaluing our capability to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Without angel investors, you will lack interfaces. We have come to know that if you disintermediate ultra-extensibly then you may also optimize extensibly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our iteration but our capacity to scale. Think robust. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We realize that if you embrace seamlessly then you may also incentivize compellingly. What does the buzzword "e-services" really mean? We here at SipsCo believe we know that it is better to scale dynamically than to syndicate extensibly. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some point) be able to generate defiantly. The TQC factor is C2C2B. If you incubate interactively, you may have to reinvent compellingly. We will rev up our capacity to productize without devaluing our ability to matrix. We have come to know that it is better to enhance intuitively than to productize strategically. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic performance and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? If you disintermediate seamlessly, you may have to deploy magnetically. SipsCo has revamped the idea of 24/7 CAE. We will embrace the industry jargon "24/7". The Total Quality Management factor is back-end. We understand that it is better to e-enable perfectly than to reintermediate virtually. Do you have a strategy to become back-end, back-end, world-class, enterprise? The power to unleash cyber-intuitively leads to the capacity to redefine seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic, short-term? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, global. If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to unleash extensibly. Think super-web-enabled. We think we know that it is better to productize extensibly than to utilize super-interactively.