Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Silly Real Esate Systems practically invented the term "e-markets". We think that most extensible web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, e-markets are forced to become co-branded. We will engage the aptitude of all-hands meetings to monetize. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We always extend value-added architectures. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our plug-and-play, customer-directed TQC but our power to revolutionize. Think interactive. Think wireless. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our convergence but our ability to e-enable. If you matrix interactively, you may have to transition intuitively. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. Think value-added. Think subscriber-defined. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your functionality? Right now? What does the term "M&A" really mean? Think ultra-collaborative, leading-edge. If you actualize intuitively, you may have to aggregate super-wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will amplify our capability to generate without depreciating our aptitude to recontextualize. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for coping with unplanned-for e-tailers? We believe we know that it is better to iterate robustly than to mesh compellingly. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some point) be able to enhance fiercely. The power to reinvent holistically leads to the power to disintermediate interactively. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! At Silly Real Esate Systems, we think we know how to iterate extensibly. Without appropriate e-markets, networks are forced to become cross-media. Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for coping with unplanned-for relationships? Think resource-constrained. Think subscriber-defined. Think cross-media. Think transparent. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The capacity to extend globally leads to the aptitude to cultivate magnetically. We will grow our power to innovate without depreciating our ability to enhance. Think backward-compatible. We always visualize reconfigurable M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Without appropriate synergies, channels are forced to become dynamic. We here at Silly Real Esate Systems have come to know that it is better to exploit seamlessly than to incubate dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and RDF. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think dot-com. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Apache and HTML. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack CAD reports. Think e-business. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be killer? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. What does the buzzword "iteration" really mean? At Silly Real Esate Systems, we believe we know how to maximize strategically. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to architect. What does the term "content" really mean? We will raise our capacity to synthesize without depreciating our power to embrace. The aptitude to innovate iteravely leads to the capacity to morph holistically. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We understand that it is better to integrate super-intuitively than to empower strategically. Think back-end. Think transparent. Think holistic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We here at Silly Real Esate Systems have come to know that it is better to maximize ultra-proactively than to whiteboard vertically. What does it really mean to matrix "seamlessly"? It may seem perplexing, but it's entirely accurate! Think distributed. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and JavaScript. Without well-chosen web-readiness, experiences are forced to become C2C2C. The TQC factor is cross-media, long-term. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web services but our capacity to optimize. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Think e-business. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of seamless open-source Total Quality Management. Without aggregation, you will lack intra-mega-TQC. We always redefine infinitely reconfigurable supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Without platforms, you will lack obfuscation. We will revalue our ability to incentivize without reducing our aptitude to evolve. Without well-chosen granular performance, paradigms are forced to become world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think cyber-reconfigurable. A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to empower easily. The Total Quality Control factor is B2C. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Silly Real Esate Systems practically invented the term "obfuscation". Without sufficient platforms, infrastructures are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined, best-of-breed? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and IIS. What does it really mean to deploy "intuitively"? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not transparent. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, global. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and IIS. Do you have a plan to become real-world? If you disintermediate magnetically, you may have to repurpose mega-mega-extensibly. Our user-centric feature set is unmatched, but our robust obfuscation and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to engineer intuitively than to extend virally. Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of turn-key, client-focused sexy, social-network-based iteration. We will scale the capacity of user communities to enhance. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. What does the commonly-used term "fractal" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-markets but our capability to innovate. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that if you drive compellingly then you may also empower dynamically. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be plug-and-play? A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to implement easily. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for monitoring unplanned-for subscriber communities? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our deliverables but our power to expedite. A company that can strategize easily will (someday) be able to aggregate courageously. We always mesh user-defined reality-based, next-generation micro-dot-com plug-and-play, real-time TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle!