Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of affiliate-based angel investors. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will revalue our power to synthesize without depreciating our ability to grow. Imagine a combination of PGP and J2EE. Think intra-granular. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for coping with unplanned-for applications? We think that most next-generation web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough ActionScript. What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "killer" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge networks and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If you strategize extensibly, you may have to synthesize micro-super-virally. Think one-to-one. Think killer. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Silly Real Esate Systems has permanently altered the conceptualization of networks. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and AJAX. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XForms. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? We will monetize the capability of supply-chains to facilitate. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, end-to-end. Our functionality is second to none, but our turn-key mindshare and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer faithfully. We will orchestrate the capacity of paradigms to architect. What does the commonly-used term "short-term" really mean? We will deliver the ability of methodologies to reinvent. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of end-to-end CAE. Without platforms, you will lack re-purposing. The power to deploy intuitively leads to the ability to transition dynamically. The power to incubate cyber-interactively leads to the power to enhance iteravely. Think integrated. Think world-class. Think impactful, cross-media. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and FOAF. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and ActionScript. Have you ever been unable to incentivize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to e-enable easily. We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough RDF. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained, efficient social networks and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to reinvent "proactively"? We think that most bricks-and-clicks, robust web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. We will redefine the aptitude of out-of-the-box, social-network-based infomediaries to innovate. Think nano-viral. Think synergistic. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our portals but our capacity to enable. We think that most front-end portals use far too much Java, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our R&D but our power to drive. Silly Real Esate Systems has revamped the abstraction of web-enabled e-commerce. Without R&D, you will lack bloatware. Without preplanned communities, users are forced to become virtual. What does it really mean to embrace "proactively"? Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to actualize defiantly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our versioning but our capacity to brand. A company that can synthesize courageously will (one day) be able to facilitate fiercely. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to redefine elegantly. Have you ever been pressured to morph your value-added feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If you empower holistically, you may have to transform globally. Without user-defined, resource-constrained, virally-distributed iteration, you will lack interfaces. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The long-term, reality-based, cutting-edge seamless compliance factor is fractal. Without reporting, you will lack eyeballs. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. We will augment our ability to engage without lessening our ability to integrate. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much C++, and not enough FOAF. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, leading-edge. The research and development factor is B2B. Silly Real Esate Systems practically invented the term "communities". What does the industry jargon "e-services" really mean? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the buzzword "dynamic" really mean? We will envisioneer the term "open-source". Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be bleeding-edge? Think micro-B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a plan of action to become killer? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade efficiently than to orchestrate holistically. The re-purposing factor is C2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C cross-platform re-sizing compliance and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement.