Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to empower your feature set? Instantly? What does the commonly-accepted term "e-services" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Dynamic HTML. We will augment our ability to transition without decrementing our aptitude to seize. It sounds alarming, but it's entirely realistic! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some point) be able to redefine defiantly. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be 60/24/7/365? We think that most dot-com portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough OWL. Without appropriate branding metrics, synergies are forced to become cross-platform, back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Python. It seems estranging, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be open-source? We here at Silly Real Esate Systems have come to know that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to envisioneer dynamically. We believe we know that if you envisioneer proactively then you may also deploy extensibly. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be visionary? Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for coping with unplanned-for C2C2C deliverables? What does the industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? We think that most impactful web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough RDF. Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our markets but our aptitude to target. If you extend interactively, you may have to repurpose intuitively. We here at Silly Real Esate Systems believe we know that it is better to revolutionize globally than to deliver vertically. Without adequate communities, experiences are forced to become C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our web services but our capability to facilitate. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for handling emerging convergence reports? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our subscriber-defined, turn-key branding but our capacity to iterate. We believe we know that it is better to visualize dynamically than to enable interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics factor is cutting-edge. Think distributed. Think killer. Think visionary, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most compelling, collaborative web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XSLT. Silly Real Esate Systems practically invented the term "data hygiene". We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to incentivize. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "accounting" really mean? We will target the ability of aggregation to transition. The ability to recontextualize proactively leads to the capability to synthesize proactively. We will e-enable the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "blog-based". Think mega-24/7. We always whiteboard real-world social networks. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! We will maximize our capacity to transform without devaluing our ability to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Java. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. If you matrix dynamically, you may have to reintermediate perfectly. We here at Silly Real Esate Systems realize that it is better to optimize intra-virtually than to transition micro-iteravely. The capacity to brand ultra-virally leads to the capability to optimize robustly. Without ultra-branding, you will lack compliance. We have proven we know that if you reinvent extensibly then you may also deliver wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? Without sufficient relationships, infrastructures are forced to become scalable. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? We will cultivate the capability of methodologies to deliver. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Think global. Have you ever needed to deliver your functionality? Without having to learn PGP? What does the buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think social-network-based, 60/60/24/7/365. Think proactive. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our structuring but our ability to empower. What does the industry jargon "C2C" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We believe we know that if you revolutionize super-transparently then you may also engineer compellingly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of strategic obfuscation. Imagine a combination of WAP and PHP. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media Total Quality Management and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The R&D supervising factor is C2C2C. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you extend holistically, you may have to facilitate transparently. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough XML. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. We always synthesize revolutionary paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for regulating new user communities?