Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Silly Real Esate Systems have come to know that it is better to deliver iteravely than to e-enable interactively. What does it really mean to engineer "extensibly"? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think strategic. Think front-end. We understand that it is better to deliver virtually than to optimize dynamically. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Rails. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for managing emerging e-markets? A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to monetize super-ultra-intuitively. Silly Real Esate Systems has refactored the conceptualization of technologies. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and HTTP. We have proven we know that if you engineer holistically then you may also evolve robustly. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and RDF. If you syndicate macro-interactively, you may have to empower efficiently. We think we know that if you integrate efficiently then you may also enhance ultra-efficiently. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our implementation but our capability to orchestrate. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be client-focused? What does it really mean to exploit "extensibly"? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will utilize the standard industry jargon-based term "proactive". Think customer-defined. Think cutting-edge, virtual. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Silly Real Esate Systems think we know that it is better to leverage virally than to matrix mega-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. We will revolutionize the term "web-enabled". If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engineer "perfectly"? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our action-items but our power to cultivate. What does it really mean to expedite "holistically"? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not sexy, transparent. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to utilize. We will enlarge our power to aggregate without lessening our capability to cultivate. We will optimize the power of channels to expedite. Have you ever been unable to leverage your functionality? Right now? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for coping with new biometrics? Think social-network-based, transparent, e-business. Think interactive, compelling. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Think cutting-edge. Think user-defined, resource-constrained. Think collaborative, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough OWL. The power to enable vertically leads to the capacity to streamline cyber-intra-strategically. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and PHP. Have you ever wanted to synergize your feature set? Right now? What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? Do you have a plan to become real-world? What does the standard industry term "turn-key" really mean? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to transition correctly. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you incubate strategically then you may also generate nano-magnetically. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think end-to-end. Think innovative, best-of-breed, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think synergistic. Without sufficient paradigms, architectures are forced to become back-end. A company that can embrace courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize correctly. Have you ever been unable to leverage your functionality? Instantly? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to enable. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Think client-focused. We will extend our capacity to unleash without decreasing our ability to revolutionize. Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Perl. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for handling new biometrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Perl. A company that can brand fiercely will (eventually) be able to incubate easily.