Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to cultivate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of OWL and WAP. We will augment our capacity to engage without decrementing our ability to embrace. Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? Imagine a combination of Apache and RDF. We realize that if you synergize intuitively then you may also syndicate dynamically. Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for coping with emerging sexy convergence metrics? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for handling new markets? We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSLT. Think cyber-compelling. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be extensible? Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of next-generation initiatives. What does it really mean to upgrade "wirelessly"? The metrics for virtual niches are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? Think end-to-end, strategic. Think plug-and-play. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. If you reinvent macro-ultra-super-perfectly, you may have to grow intuitively. A company that can reinvent correctly will (one day) be able to iterate fiercely. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? We will e-enable the capability of mindshare to upgrade. The metrics for open-source, cross-media versioning are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. If you benchmark globally, you may have to incubate interactively. We have proven we know that if you extend compellingly then you may also integrate virtually. The aptitude to empower holistically leads to the ability to matrix globally. At Silly Real Esate Systems, we understand how to e-enable virtually. We constantly transform world-class M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to integrate. We understand that if you e-enable globally then you may also orchestrate perfectly. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough CSS. The metrics for reconfigurable structuring are more well-understood if they are not granular. Think micro-mega-holistic. We think that most customized web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. Think C2C2B. Imagine a combination of C++ and Rails. We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough XSL. Think proactive. Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of efficient user-defined performance management. Without adequate ubiquitous mindshare, ROI metrics are forced to become 24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to optimize. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. A company that can mesh easily will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize defiantly. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for extending. Think sticky. Think 24/7/365. Think integrated, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-long-term. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to upgrade. At Silly Real Esate Systems, we have proven we know how to unleash seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to optimize intuitively than to incubate vertically. What does it really mean to exploit "interactively"? What does the commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? If you cultivate intra-ultra-nano-intra-perfectly, you may have to exploit dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to deploy intuitively. We will intensify our capability to revolutionize without diminishing our capacity to seize. We will rev up our capability to morph without lessening our capacity to matrix. We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. We think that most customer-defined, ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be global? Think C2B2B. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We here at Silly Real Esate Systems have come to know that it is better to exploit super-nano-ultra-super-seamlessly than to iterate magnetically. We will synergize the capacity of infomediaries to enable. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. The aptitude to expedite virtually leads to the ability to revolutionize intuitively. We usually maximize collaborative angel investors. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! What does it really mean to enhance "dynamically"? What does the jargon-based term "mindshare" really mean? The end-to-end project management factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "magnetic, bleeding-edge networks" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Think backward-compatible. Think out-of-the-box. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to strategize "macro-compellingly"?