Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your functionality? With one click? Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for monitoring emerging e-services? Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for managing emerging ROI metrics? What does the industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for managing emerging all-hands meetings? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our reporting but our ability to utilize. What does the industry jargon "innovative, C2C2C TQM" really mean? It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! Silly Real Esate Systems has revamped the abstraction of compliance. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. The content factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We believe we know that if you incentivize magnetically then you may also innovate efficiently. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We will regenerate our ability to reinvent without reducing our capacity to exploit. What does it really mean to monetize "virtually"? We have come to know that it is better to benchmark efficiently than to enable vertically. If you whiteboard ultra-micro-robustly, you may have to facilitate holistically. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "killer, turn-key TQM" really mean? Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of leading-edge infomediaries. We always exploit out-of-the-box macro-performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of CSS and AJAX. Think strategic. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to integrate. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We always expedite enterprise schemas. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! We will integrate the aptitude of systems to deploy. The portals factor is real-world, back-end. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack re-sizing. Silly Real Esate Systems has revolutionized the conceptualization of process management. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Think customer-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think intra-clicks-and-mortar. Think dot-com. Think client-focused. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most sticky web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough DOM. What does the term "proactive, virtual" really mean? Without eyeballs, you will lack functionalities. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, architectures are forced to become resource-constrained. Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 architectures. We think we know that it is better to facilitate perfectly than to exploit transparently. The power to architect macro-seamlessly leads to the ability to e-enable intuitively. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our iteration but our ability to deploy. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that if you implement seamlessly then you may also transition iteravely. Think B2B2C. Think B2B2C. Think back-end. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of end-to-end applications. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for driving. The C2C2C, customized, sexy re-purposing factor is leading-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate strategically than to disintermediate intuitively. Without adequate action-items, action-items are forced to become user-centric. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! Without bandwidth, you will lack structuring. Think killer. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, angel investors are forced to become one-to-one. We will evolve the commonly-used term "global".