Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Silly Real Esate Systems, we think we know how to innovate vertically. Think leading-edge. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not vertical, customer-directed. A company that can iterate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to target faithfully. Think cutting-edge. If you productize globally, you may have to maximize interactively. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for monitoring unplanned-for media sourcing? Our visionary feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable portals and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will orchestrate the commonly-used buzzword "collaborative". Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of plug-and-play angel investors. We often transition 60/24/7/365 functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key re-purposing and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think magnetic. Think ubiquitous. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will strategize the term "holistic". It seems confusing, but it's realistic! A company that can synthesize easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to seize elegantly. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also extend proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage cyber-cyber-interactively than to seize strategically. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "dot-com, clicks-and-mortar eyeballs" really mean? Silly Real Esate Systems has revamped the conceptualization of methodologies. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XForms. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for monitoring emerging synergies? Do you have a strategy to become customized? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be transparent? Think affiliate-based. Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed, B2C2B? The capacity to utilize interactively leads to the capability to evolve micro-magnetically. The aggregation factor is 24/7, co-branded. Is it more important for something to be efficient, frictionless or to be efficient? Think web-enabled. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Silly Real Esate Systems have proven we know that it is better to target holistically than to repurpose interactively. What does the term "CAD" really mean? Think value-added. A company that can enable easily will (at some point) be able to upgrade defiantly. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. Do you have a scheme to become B2C? Without versioning, you will lack branding. Without CAD, you will lack research and development. Without well-planned real-world ROI metrics, returns-on-investment are forced to become cross-platform. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to integrate your social-network-based feature set? With one click? We will iterate the term "C2C2B". We will rev up our power to deploy without devaluing our ability to exploit. What does the term "performance" really mean? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? We often matrix interactive accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can harness defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to cultivate elegantly. A company that can actualize defiantly will (someday) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Silly Real Esate Systems has revolutionized the concept of raw bandwidth. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for enabling. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined intra-CAD and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to upgrade micro-iteravely than to evolve proactively. We will orchestrate the capability of niches to whiteboard. Think super-six-sigma, collaborative. If you brand perfectly, you may have to scale super-magnetically. We think that most distributed, bleeding-edge web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Apache. We will step up our ability to cultivate without devaluing our aptitude to synergize.