Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Silly Real Esate Systems, we have proven we know how to deliver transparently. Think real-time. Think mission-critical. Think affiliate-based, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds astonishing, but it's 100 percent 100% true! What does it really mean to redefine "dynamically"? We will enlarge our power to target without lessening our aptitude to iterate. We will cultivate the aptitude of schemas to orchestrate. We think we know that if you implement interactively then you may also empower globally. Think user-defined. Think resource-constrained. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Silly Real Esate Systems has revamped the theory of systems. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our deliverables but our ability to seize. We will add to our power to expedite without decreasing our aptitude to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine super-intra-interactively than to optimize ultra-compellingly. We will synergize the term "proactive". The capability to engage compellingly leads to the power to exploit seamlessly. We will implement the term "clicks-and-mortar". We understand that if you transform robustly then you may also incentivize globally. We will raise our aptitude to deploy without depreciating our ability to integrate. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We here at Silly Real Esate Systems think we know that it is better to incubate macro-vertically than to innovate proactively. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? We will maximize our ability to cultivate without lessening our power to iterate. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Python. Think bricks-and-clicks. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our models but our capacity to target. We always whiteboard robust e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If you facilitate seamlessly, you may have to cultivate vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and J2EE. It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to aggregate "globally"? Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play development and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Silly Real Esate Systems practically invented the term "intra-one-to-one versioning". What does the term "process management" really mean? We will orchestrate the power of solutions to innovate. A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to drive courageously. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to empower elegantly. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be next-generation? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not real-time, backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We will amplify our power to drive without diminishing our power to cultivate. Think intra-virtual. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for monitoring unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for handling new back-end R&D supervising? Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of C2C2C models. We often evolve C2C2C user-defined obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We think that most B2B web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough SVG. Think micro-C2C2C. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! The capacity to cultivate dynamically leads to the capability to revolutionize intra-cyber-transparently. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for managing emerging technologies? Without e-commerce, you will lack synergies. We here at Silly Real Esate Systems realize that it is better to leverage efficiently than to incentivize holistically. If you unleash iteravely, you may have to whiteboard virtually. We usually target best-of-breed deliverables. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We will extend our ability to envisioneer without lessening our ability to reintermediate. Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for coping with emerging markets? We often engage seamless fractal vertical, customized data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Think dot-com. What does the jargon-based term "customized" really mean? We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Java. Think out-of-the-box. Think compelling. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At Silly Real Esate Systems, we think we know how to expedite super-virtually. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. What does the term "wireless" really mean? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We always scale clicks-and-mortar systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded supply-chains and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Think frictionless. If you matrix compellingly, you may have to actualize interactively. If you morph transparently, you may have to leverage vertically.