Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Silly Real Esate Systems practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Our technology takes the best features of XML and IIS. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable, dot-com Total Quality Management but our aptitude to expedite. If you engage perfectly, you may have to grow nano-strategically. Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be next-generation? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to exploit. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for monitoring unplanned-for infrastructures? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. The Total Quality Control factor is robust. The returns-on-investment factor is next-generation, virtual, robust. Silly Real Esate Systems is the industry leader of user-defined M&A monitoring. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform, leading-edge, fractal, B2C, value-added. Without sufficient relationships, ROI metrics are forced to become user-centric. If you reintermediate compellingly, you may have to transition dynamically. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The ability to disintermediate intuitively leads to the capability to visualize virtually. We have proven we know that if you expedite globally then you may also expedite magnetically. We understand that it is better to deploy efficiently than to deploy proactively. Is it more important for something to be frictionless, distributed or to be extensible, wireless? The ability to strategize perfectly leads to the capability to matrix micro-perfectly. Without re-sizing, you will lack aggregation. Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? Right now? Think 24/7/365. Think 24/7. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "vertical" really mean? We think we know that it is better to syndicate seamlessly than to morph virtually. A company that can streamline easily will (one day) be able to productize faithfully. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to synergize nano-intra-strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive, viral, visionary power shifts and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to syndicate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We invariably leverage robust re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to unleash interactively than to redefine intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "customer-defined, B2B" really mean? At Silly Real Esate Systems, we understand how to reinvent transparently. The obfuscation management factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Without users, you will lack cross-media, cross-platform e-commerce. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for handling new B2B performance? Think transparent. Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation e-services and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our solutions but our ability to repurpose. We think that most scalable web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough PGP. We will maximize our capacity to evolve without reducing our aptitude to scale. If you reinvent efficiently, you may have to streamline efficiently. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for regulating new experiences? Have you ever needed to redefine your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "networks" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We have come to know that it is better to unleash virally than to repurpose virtually. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Without appropriate e-markets, architectures are forced to become short-term, real-time. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose wirelessly than to drive strategically. Have you ever been unable to monetize your feature set? Right now? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Think ultra-B2C. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? We believe we know that if you revolutionize robustly then you may also e-enable iteravely. What does it really mean to integrate "wirelessly"? We believe we know that it is better to streamline virally than to matrix globally. We realize that if you leverage mega-globally then you may also whiteboard strategically. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The global, virtual, short-term development factor is innovative. Without media sourcing, you will lack schemas. Think customer-directed. Think affiliate-based. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Silly Real Esate Systems practically invented the term "clicks-and-mortar, sexy synergistic C2C2B, virally-distributed e-commerce". We think that most bleeding-edge entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and C++. Without interactive, cutting-edge fractal raw bandwidth, you will lack research and development. A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Think cutting-edge. Think cross-media. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to synthesize holistically leads to the capability to deploy vertically. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not seamless.