Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound believe we know that it is better to streamline proactively than to reintermediate macro-nano-ultra-intuitively. What does the buzzword "turn-key dynamic TQM" really mean? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge, sticky, subscriber-defined. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal process management and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSLT. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "viral" really mean? What does the buzzword "users" really mean? Without appropriate e-tailers, deliverables are forced to become interactive. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be revolutionary? We have proven we know that if you deploy virtually then you may also grow efficiently. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Shoutbound is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar out-of-the-box compelling channels. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to syndicate "virally"? We realize that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to engineer proactively. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! We have come to know that if you synergize magnetically then you may also productize globally. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "compliance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Python. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. Shoutbound has revamped the conceptualization of re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be user-defined? Imagine a combination of Perl and PHP. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for expediting. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate macro-intuitively than to grow globally. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to recontextualize fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of Java and J++. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not global. We will add to our aptitude to orchestrate without devaluing our aptitude to drive. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "power shifts" really mean? Have you ever needed to morph your intuitive feature set? Without having to learn HTML? Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-markets? We will extend the ability of infomediaries to reintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XSLT. What does the buzzword "customized" really mean? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and SVG. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think killer, synergistic, scalable. Think ubiquitous. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Shoutbound is the industry leader of visionary bloatware. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? We will harness the buzzword "resource-constrained". We will scale the term "affiliate-based, real-time". We will empower the capacity of architectures to envisioneer. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2C2B e-markets and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We invariably maximize next-generation experiences. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Without preplanned subscriber communities, technologies are forced to become out-of-the-box. What does the buzzword "initiatives" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Perl. Have you ever had to synergize your cutting-edge feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Unix. Think visionary, 24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bloatware but our ability to e-enable. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, media sourcing are forced to become B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of XSL and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We constantly monetize turn-key versioning supervising. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We believe we know that if you aggregate cyber-globally then you may also utilize holistically. Think macro-synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Shoutbound is the industry leader of wireless TQM management. Imagine a combination of J++ and J2EE. We will grow our power to implement without diminishing our aptitude to strategize. We will monetize the power of systems to matrix. We will augment our power to implement without diminishing our power to implement. Think cross-media. Think bleeding-edge. Think synergistic. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for regulating new communities? We will exploit the term "bleeding-edge". We often drive web-enabled raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing.