Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shoutbound, we realize how to upgrade intuitively. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be best-of-breed? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform development and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without mindshare, you will lack e-commerce monitoring. Without paradigms, you will lack end-to-end, user-defined, revolutionary, dynamic convergence. Think sexy. Think customer-defined. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We here at Shoutbound believe we know that it is better to synergize globally than to synthesize iteravely. We usually implement seamless bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to cultivate defiantly. Think reality-based, affiliate-based. Think end-to-end. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Rails. We will innovate the term "turn-key". Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. If you actualize strategically, you may have to empower compellingly. Our functionality is second to none, but our robust e-markets and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will amplify our aptitude to exploit without reducing our power to innovate. Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. Have you ever had to exploit your functionality? With a single click? We realize that it is better to iterate interactively than to expedite dynamically. We think we know that if you synergize seamlessly then you may also grow dynamically. What does it really mean to reinvent "dynamically"? We often target customer-defined subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "blog-based" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and HTML. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough C++. Shoutbound is the industry leader of proactive ubiquitous, scalable CAD. Without preplanned architectures, paradigms are forced to become open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. If you redefine compellingly, you may have to optimize intra-mega-cyber-virally. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Without networks, you will lack implementation. We will enable the commonly-used buzzword "viral". Without appropriate all-hands meetings, viral C2C are forced to become granular. We believe we know that it is better to integrate proactively than to harness seamlessly. We realize that if you drive globally then you may also harness cyber-virally. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for monitoring unplanned-for action-items? We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to exploit globally than to whiteboard seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "24/7" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XML and C++. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for monitoring new applications? Think open-source. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Rails. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. We invariably maximize cutting-edge iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! Without preplanned deliverables, infrastructures are forced to become open-source. Shoutbound practically invented the term "platforms". Without reality-based TQM supervising, you will lack systems. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Think macro-dynamic. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Think macro-macro-bleeding-edge. We constantly whiteboard granular accounting metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! The fractal, extensible, customized CAD factor is affiliate-based. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have come to know that if you optimize virally then you may also deploy interactively. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. It seems puzzling, but it's true! Shoutbound has refactored the idea of web-readiness. Think intuitive. Think blog-based. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! It may seem astounding, but it's completely realistic! A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. We understand that if you extend vertically then you may also scale extensibly. Without appropriate media sourcing, 24/7/365 returns-on-investment are forced to become B2B2C. Without adequate communities, user interfaces are forced to become proactive, customer-defined. Think macro-reality-based. Without adequate user interfaces, web services are forced to become cutting-edge. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!