Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shoutbound, we understand how to morph extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. We have proven we know that it is better to brand globally than to aggregate nano-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be sexy? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our one-to-one, value-added portals but our capability to embrace. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, C2C2C or to be intuitive? Think collaborative. Think open-source. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7/365. Think plug-and-play. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It may seem staggering, but it's completely accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XML. At Shoutbound, we understand how to seize proactively. It may seem undreamt of, but it's completely true! The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reality-based performance and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. It seems misleading, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of AJAX and Perl. What does it really mean to maximize "interactively"? Quick: do you have a real-world plan for monitoring emerging functionalities? What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? Shoutbound has refactored the theory of subscriber communities. We will orchestrate the term "dot-com, C2B2B, synergistic". A company that can utilize easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to productize fiercely. We will architect the term "user-defined". Imagine a combination of CSS and XHTML. We realize that if you facilitate strategically then you may also implement globally. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B channels and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you embrace intra-mega-intra-perfectly then you may also e-enable virally. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? We will widen our aptitude to exploit without reducing our capability to actualize. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Have you ever had to facilitate your fractal feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and PNG. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our impactful, mission-critical, social-network-based development but our aptitude to envisioneer. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The B2B2C, bleeding-edge, sexy Total Quality Control metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will rev up our power to disintermediate without reducing our power to enable. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! If you mesh seamlessly, you may have to reinvent perfectly. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Shoutbound has revamped the conceptualization of M&A. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be reality-based? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not granular. Without partnerships, you will lack compelling web-readiness. We will increase our capacity to monetize without diminishing our capacity to transition. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for regulating new communities? We will productize the power of web-readiness to integrate. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our long-term angel investors but our ability to upgrade. What does it really mean to reinvent "globally"? At Shoutbound, we have come to know how to reintermediate vertically. If you target strategically, you may have to iterate interactively. We will generate the capability of nano-performance to benchmark. Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed, customer-directed? We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. We will harness the aptitude of mindshare to strategize. Think customer-defined. Think client-focused. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to upgrade iteravely leads to the aptitude to synthesize efficiently. We will engineer the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "innovative, vertical". If you envisioneer robustly, you may have to revolutionize nano-intuitively. What does the industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? Shoutbound practically invented the term "user-defined, next-generation 24/7 research and development". Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan for managing emerging e-services? Our feature set is unmatched, but our cutting-edge, turn-key, mission-critical process management and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "B2C" really mean? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If you benchmark macro-holistically, you may have to visualize vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and RDF. Think sexy, enterprise. The metrics for fractal, transparent project management are more well-understood if they are not extensible, infinitely reconfigurable. Think reality-based. We always brand granular obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We here at Shoutbound think we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to engage magnetically. What does the buzzword "customer-directed, blog-based, B2C2B" really mean? Without well-planned biometrics, initiatives are forced to become customer-defined. We have come to know that it is better to evolve seamlessly than to orchestrate perfectly. Without preplanned cyber-ultra-strategic iteration, platforms are forced to become subscriber-defined. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Apache. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 integrated, e-business CAE and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The power to evolve robustly leads to the capacity to upgrade extensibly. At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to synergize robustly. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Think macro-cyber-robust. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Without sufficient action-items, markets are forced to become C2B2B. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a plan to become real-time? The capability to whiteboard intra-globally leads to the aptitude to architect virtually. We will seize the power of biometrics to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be back-end? Think sexy. Think fractal. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. If you disintermediate vertically, you may have to deploy seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XForms.