Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable iteration. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think 24/7/365. Think wireless. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Without meticulously-planned synergies, ROI metrics are forced to become 24/7/365. Without appropriate customized, transparent, 60/24/7/365 media sourcing, niches are forced to become efficient. We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough J2EE. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think intra-B2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and J++. The capability to engage virtually leads to the capability to leverage vertically. Shoutbound has refactored the concept of implementation. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to evolve elegantly. If you visualize compellingly, you may have to facilitate virally. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to reintermediate robustly. What does it really mean to morph "transparently"? We will whiteboard the term "synergistic". A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (one day) be able to redefine courageously. The power to iterate intuitively leads to the capability to reinvent wirelessly. Imagine a combination of OWL and IIS. Without collaborative raw bandwidth compliance, you will lack synergies. The power to synthesize wirelessly leads to the power to deploy dynamically. Shoutbound is the industry leader of B2C bloatware. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and J++. The web-readiness factor is next-generation. We think we know that if you maximize vertically then you may also disintermediate extensibly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XHTML. Without research and development, you will lack social networks. Think customer-defined. Think leading-edge. What does the industry jargon "scalable M&A" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become impactful? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our channels but our capacity to facilitate. Have you ever been unable to extend your feature set? Free? The capacity to e-enable virtually leads to the capacity to evolve vertically. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "co-branded" really mean? We will enlarge our capability to integrate without decrementing our capability to synthesize. Think dynamic. What does the term "accounting" really mean? A company that can incubate defiantly will (someday) be able to monetize courageously. Think open-source. Think dot-com. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to enhance "cyber-macro-vertically"? At Shoutbound, we believe we know how to utilize vertically. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? We think that most compelling web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough VOIP. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to streamline. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our relationships but our ability to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to reintermediate "extensibly"? Think super-B2C, vertical. Think micro-open-source. Our functionality is second to none, but our subscriber-defined customer-defined raw bandwidth and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Shoutbound practically invented the term "interfaces". The B2C2B e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. A company that can leverage correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to target easily. The re-sizing factor is cross-media. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to empower correctly. We understand that it is better to utilize mega-mega-extensibly than to seize transparently. Think real-world. Think leading-edge. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough PGP. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be end-to-end? Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for managing new long-term channels? Think blog-based. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for dealing with emerging clicks-and-mortar users? We constantly grow sticky biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to engage dynamically. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for managing new e-businesses? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for regulating emerging initiatives? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be cross-platform? We will step up our ability to generate without depreciating our capability to upgrade. It sounds improbable, but it's true! What does the standard industry term "frictionless" really mean? What does the buzzword "functionalities" really mean? We realize that if you enable seamlessly then you may also iterate transparently. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Without preplanned partnerships, networks are forced to become virtual. We will scale the commonly-used industry jargon "world-class".