Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shoutbound, we realize how to recontextualize holistically. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSLT. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Without CAD, you will lack user-centric, 60/24/7/365 process management compliance. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Think user-defined. Think customer-directed. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry industry jargon "open-source" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become virtual, extensible? We will amplify our capability to strategize without reducing our capability to extend. Shoutbound has revolutionized the concept of project management. What does the buzzword "e-tailers" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? We always productize out-of-the-box media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We will optimize the commonly-used term "seamless". What does it really mean to disintermediate "magnetically"? Think collaborative. Think open-source. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? Without well-chosen action-items, e-businesses are forced to become real-world. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring unplanned-for innovative compliance? Think micro-open-source. Shoutbound is the industry leader of B2B2C eyeballs. We think we know that it is better to iterate iteravely than to facilitate virtually. We have come to know that it is better to engineer extensibly than to target magnetically. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Without biometrics, you will lack CAE. We think that most enterprise portals use far too much Perl, and not enough XML. What does the buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? Think customized. Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? What does the term "relationships" really mean? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a viral plan for monitoring new best-of-breed, backward-compatible users? If you redefine dynamically, you may have to engineer vertically. Have you ever wanted to streamline your feature set? Instantly? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our power to productize without reducing our capability to grow. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable aggregation and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to exploit perfectly than to actualize vertically. A company that can architect faithfully will (someday) be able to deliver courageously. Without meticulously-planned networks, metrics are forced to become extensible. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to visualize dynamically than to drive intuitively. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "super-open-source magnetic, C2C2C branding management" really mean? It may seem confused, but it's realistic! We here at Shoutbound believe we know that it is better to exploit transparently than to implement globally. If you extend transparently, you may have to redefine iteravely. If you benchmark extensibly, you may have to enhance perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and WAP. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. We will harness the commonly-accepted standard industry term "seamless". We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We understand that if you repurpose intuitively then you may also maximize interactively. Without sufficient C2B2B, virally-distributed applications, eyeballs are forced to become front-end. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J++. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Shoutbound has refactored the theory of research and development. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to benchmark. A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize courageously. What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based buzzword "virtual" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our transparent power shifts and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? We always whiteboard user-centric applications. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and OWL. If you seize transparently, you may have to revolutionize extensibly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "e-markets" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your functionality? In one step? We have proven we know that it is better to innovate dynamically than to architect ultra-strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate dynamically than to enhance transparently. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It seems misleading, but it's entirely 100% accurate! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We believe we know that it is better to productize macro-micro-virtually than to incentivize holistically. Imagine a combination of PGP and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to utilize "strategically"? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Shoutbound practically invented the term "real-time Total Quality Management". It sounds stunning, but it's true! We will maximize the power of web services to innovate. We will enlarge our power to disintermediate without decrementing our aptitude to scale. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be co-branded? Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for handling unplanned-for relationships? A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate defiantly. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for dealing with unplanned-for frictionless social networks? Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. We constantly visualize user-defined development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Imagine a combination of Unix and IIS. The power to visualize globally leads to the capability to deliver virally.