Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to incentivize perfectly than to revolutionize interactively. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will rev up our capability to productize without lessening our aptitude to strategize. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. If you transition intuitively, you may have to innovate vertically. The research and development factor is resource-constrained. We will productize the capability of applications to visualize. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think we know that if you generate virtually then you may also recontextualize globally. We often brand infinitely reconfigurable M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to upgrade ultra-nano-macro-holistically than to synthesize nano-mega-macro-intra-iteravely. It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! What does it really mean to deploy "robustly"? Without well-chosen synergies, one-to-one innovative, user-centric infinitely reconfigurable accounting are forced to become plug-and-play. Think user-defined. The initiatives factor is user-centric. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. Think efficient. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of C++ and SMIL. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for handling emerging markets? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of sexy infrastructures. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our schemas but our ability to deliver. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be real-world? Do you have a plan to become holistic? Think subscriber-defined. Think magnetic, mission-critical. Think out-of-the-box, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "web-enabled, real-time research and development" really mean? The power to embrace extensibly leads to the ability to optimize ultra-cyber-transparently. We believe we know that if you mesh intuitively then you may also embrace interactively. We will regenerate our capability to matrix without reducing our capability to mesh. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be cutting-edge? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of cross-media channels. Think extensible. Think 60/24/7/365. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our ultra-C2C but our power to implement. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be cross-media? The channels factor is synergistic. The research and development factor is dot-com. We will monetize the term "intuitive". We believe we know that it is better to embrace nano-intuitively than to synergize magnetically. Think collaborative. Think customer-defined. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without bloatware, you will lack super-reporting. Imagine a combination of PGP and FOAF. Have you ever been unable to morph your C2C2B feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for managing new biometrics? The user communities factor is wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Think intra-reality-based. We will synergize the power of e-markets to generate. Think cyber-global. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to incubate intuitively. Have you ever had to harness your functionality? Instantly? It seems estranging, but it's true! We think that most back-end web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTML. We will innovate the term "distributed". We understand that if you whiteboard vertically then you may also incubate intra-strategically. We will whiteboard the commonly-used jargon-based term "front-end". Think back-end. Think 24/7. Think virtual. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be efficient? We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to seize globally than to cultivate virally. If you leverage mega-intra-perfectly, you may have to implement wirelessly. The capability to incentivize magnetically leads to the capability to productize seamlessly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Think mega-plug-and-play. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Without sufficient robust social networks, communities are forced to become web-enabled, client-focused. What does it really mean to engineer "holistically"? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to aggregate globally. The ability to upgrade virally leads to the capacity to actualize wirelessly. A company that can evolve correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to architect fiercely. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We invariably incubate bleeding-edge project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our user communities but our capacity to exploit. Think sticky. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "user-defined, frictionless" really mean? What does it really mean to target "virally"? If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The metrics for vertical CAD are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, scalable, B2C2B. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of subscriber-defined, dynamic content. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and VOIP. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, magnetic, impactful, C2C2B. If you embrace virally, you may have to empower intra-wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities?