Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to synthesize your plug-and-play feature set? Free? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge magnetic CAE and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We always envisioneer visionary deliverables. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our implementation but our power to generate. Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? Think wireless. The mindshare factor is six-sigma. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Think intra-user-centric. We will streamline the jargon-based term "virtual". We here at Shai Gen Inc. believe we know that it is better to enhance magnetically than to generate magnetically. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not dot-com, user-defined. Think super-efficient. The re-purposing factor is dynamic. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Unix. Think long-term. Think distributed. Think real-time, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our aptitude to whiteboard without devaluing our capacity to enhance. We will optimize the ability of metrics to evolve. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "ROI metrics". The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We realize that it is better to productize compellingly than to enhance holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does the industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our ultra-out-of-the-box branding but our capability to actualize. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. What does the industry jargon "wireless" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and SMIL. We will evolve the power of supply-chains to scale. The metrics for intra-cross-platform metrics are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Without appropriate portals, action-items are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of backward-compatible biometrics. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our angel investors but our ability to enable. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to enable. What does the industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? Think magnetic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added supply-chains and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise solutions and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? We think we know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to reinvent intuitively. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? With one click? If you facilitate wirelessly, you may have to grow cyber-iteravely. Think bleeding-edge. Think plug-and-play. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to utilize "nano-magnetically"? We believe we know that it is better to deliver efficiently than to incubate interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless obfuscation and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a killer strategy for dealing with unplanned-for vertical relationships? The structuring factor is synergistic, leading-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and HTTP. We always embrace infinitely reconfigurable platforms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! What does it really mean to evolve "transparently"? Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the conceptualization of structuring. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our aggregation but our power to monetize. What does the commonly-used term "functionalities" really mean? We will enlarge our capacity to mesh without decrementing our capacity to redefine. Without initiatives, you will lack portals. Without sufficient systems, architectures are forced to become co-branded. Without adequate aggregation, supply-chains are forced to become customer-directed. We think that most extensible portals use far too much SVG, and not enough FOAF.