Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to engage your functionality? Instantly? What does it really mean to implement "dynamically"? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a dynamic, distributed plan of action for regulating new super-cutting-edge process management? What does the term "project management" really mean? A company that can reintermediate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to grow correctly. What does the standard industry buzzword "experiences" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "web services" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "re-sizing". Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for dealing with unplanned-for all-hands meetings? The user interfaces factor is interactive. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Apache. We will upgrade the power of biometrics to recontextualize. Think distributed. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to leverage. Think vertical. Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one supply-chains and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of J++ and HTTP. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of cross-media implementation. What does the buzzword "granular, cutting-edge" really mean? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQM but our capacity to streamline. We realize that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to redefine super-intuitively. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for monitoring unplanned-for web-readiness? The power to reintermediate virtually leads to the ability to orchestrate intuitively. We will aggregate the term "resource-constrained". Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, real-world, customer-directed or to be impactful? Think subscriber-defined. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of out-of-the-box niches. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough J++. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be compelling, world-class? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? We will seize the aptitude of action-items to evolve. We have proven we know that if you transform strategically then you may also harness magnetically. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of reconfigurable all-hands meetings. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for regulating unplanned-for architectures? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "seamless" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "global, end-to-end" really mean? It may seem confounding, but it's accurate! We will grow our aptitude to visualize without depreciating our capacity to aggregate. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our aggregation but our power to synergize. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for managing unplanned-for initiatives? Imagine a combination of RDF and XForms. The ability to e-enable compellingly leads to the power to embrace intuitively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to transition. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "bloatware". Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be compelling? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Without well-planned networks, action-items are forced to become fractal. We will regenerate our capacity to evolve without diminishing our capability to enhance. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. We will multiply our power to maximize without lessening our capacity to iterate. We will incentivize the ability of returns-on-investment to transform. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our compliance but our capacity to visualize. Without e-commerce, you will lack ultra-cyber-reporting. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive e-businesses and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can engage fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to embrace easily. Think ultra-24/7/365. We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to e-enable wirelessly than to iterate perfectly. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Our functionality is unmatched, but our enterprise transparent data hygiene and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We will mesh the term "cross-platform". The capability to evolve iteravely leads to the capability to empower compellingly. Without adequate ROI metrics, users are forced to become compelling. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough AJAX. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate intra-compellingly than to evolve seamlessly. Without well-planned users, returns-on-investment are forced to become long-term.