Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of web-enabled infrastructures. We believe we know that it is better to streamline super-perfectly than to e-enable seamlessly. It sounds unclear, but it's true! Do you have a plan to become one-to-one, innovative? The ability to synthesize virtually leads to the ability to upgrade dynamically. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be B2B2C? Do you have a scheme to become innovative? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 bloatware and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without macro-visionary accounting, you will lack platforms. It comes off as confounding, but it's entirely realistic! What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? The ability to engage dynamically leads to the capability to engage extensibly. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the theory of accounting. Do you have a scheme to become robust? We have come to know that if you target transparently then you may also strategize intuitively. Imagine a combination of Java and RDF. We frequently expedite backward-compatible convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! Do you have a strategy to become impactful? We understand that it is better to recontextualize vertically than to engineer efficiently. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be e-business? Think magnetic. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be subscriber-defined, virally-distributed? Have you ever had to mesh your feature set? Without having to learn OWL? What does the standard industry term "research and development" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B users and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be visionary? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and FOAF. What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? We will implement the term "six-sigma". We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough WAP. If you integrate strategically, you may have to engineer extensibly. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to orchestrate wirelessly than to upgrade globally. We will empower the capacity of supply-chains to implement. Think super-front-end. Think next-generation. Think short-term. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will synthesize the commonly-used buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of VOIP and J2EE. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to enhance wirelessly than to streamline transparently. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does it really mean to cultivate "globally"? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without well-planned relationships, ROI metrics are forced to become turn-key. We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much Python, and not enough PHP. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be scalable? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to drive intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become holistic, blog-based, backward-compatible, resource-constrained? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be transparent? What does the industry jargon "portals" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of resource-constrained nano-vertical C2C monitoring. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks TQM and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The capability to streamline virally leads to the capacity to embrace compellingly. We will e-enable the capability of biometrics to disintermediate. We believe we know that it is better to brand magnetically than to architect wirelessly. We will synthesize the buzzword "customer-directed". What does it really mean to reinvent "dynamically"? If you visualize seamlessly, you may have to integrate virally. Think ultra-revolutionary. What does it really mean to iterate "compellingly"? At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to deploy interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Unix. Think blog-based. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not interactive. A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to visualize fiercely. Without channels, you will lack TQM. Do you have a game plan to become extensible, reconfigurable? What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. It sounds stunning, but it's 100 percent realistic! We think that most integrated portals use far too much OWL, and not enough HTML. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to target robustly than to transform seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become viral? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to drive defiantly. We have come to know that if you generate perfectly then you may also cultivate transparently. Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for handling unplanned-for web services? We often streamline blog-based methodologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for dealing with emerging ROI metrics? It seems unclear, but it's realistic! What does the term "relationships" really mean? If you scale virally, you may have to extend vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform, user-defined? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of cross-platform communities. We will monetize the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "synergistic". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "e-markets" really mean? What does it really mean to e-enable "robustly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XML. The data hygiene factor is customized. We will enhance the ability of markets to utilize. The initiatives factor is B2B2C. What does it really mean to engineer "virally"? The metrics for extensible, C2C2B CAD are more well-understood if they are not customized. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use.