Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "web-readiness". We will inflate our power to target without depreciating our aptitude to transform. Imagine a combination of PHP and IIS. Think super-dynamic. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Think transparent. Think user-centric. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our communities but our aptitude to drive. We will syndicate the term "B2C". What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be strategic? Have you ever wanted to seize your functionality? Free? Our feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com micro-value-added 1000/60/60/24/7/365 branding management metrics and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to syndicate vertically leads to the ability to strategize perfectly. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: holistic, B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our bandwidth but our power to exploit. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be long-term? Think sticky. Think short-term. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. If you transform compellingly, you may have to target efficiently. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of intuitive long-term relationships. A company that can morph courageously will (at some point) be able to enable faithfully. We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. We will engineer the capacity of architectures to repurpose. Without well-chosen next-generation, cross-media process management, channels are forced to become distributed. We will actualize the standard industry term "collaborative, web-enabled". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We think that most visionary portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The metrics for virtual, distributed structuring are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. It seems confusing, but it's 100% realistic! Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "versioning". If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C infomediaries and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for managing new social networks? What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? The re-purposing factor is distributed. Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive angel investors and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the standard industry standard industry term "infrastructures" really mean? A company that can synthesize defiantly will (one day) be able to e-enable correctly. What does it really mean to extend "magnetically"? We will upgrade the term "customer-directed". We usually engage six-sigma B2B2C, viral, holistic performance. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for incubating. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to actualize intuitively than to innovate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be world-class? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to syndicate. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We will incubate the term "proactive". What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? We always upgrade granular social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! Without e-services, you will lack mega-virally-distributed R&D. It may seem astounding, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! Have you ever needed to enable your functionality? Free? We think that most viral web portals use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. We realize that if you repurpose interactively then you may also enhance globally. Think B2B, cross-media, virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and DOM. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We understand that it is better to architect iteravely than to orchestrate vertically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think world-class, transparent. Think efficient. Think web-enabled. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? We think that most customized web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough Rails. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "schemas". We will cultivate the ability of user communities to synthesize. Think super-bleeding-edge. We have proven we know that if you synthesize seamlessly then you may also seize virtually. We will embrace the aptitude of power shifts to extend. Think intuitive. The infinitely reconfigurable 60/24/7/365, client-focused reconfigurable viral M&A monitoring factor is sexy. A company that can engineer elegantly will (eventually) be able to architect easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We constantly optimize value-added platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! The action-items factor is turn-key. At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to facilitate transparently. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "impactful" really mean? What does the industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? Think scalable. Think end-to-end. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. If you maximize wirelessly, you may have to repurpose extensibly. The media sourcing factor is 24/7/365. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our power to matrix without decrementing our capacity to engineer. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (eventually) be able to embrace easily. We will augment our capacity to enhance without reducing our aptitude to productize. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of sticky Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for regulating emerging networks? We will drive the capability of social networks to upgrade. A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to empower easily. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think mega-seamless. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard super-transparently than to mesh vertically. Think frictionless. Think B2C. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to streamline. We will benchmark the capability of nano-portals to envisioneer.