Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "reporting". We will benchmark the standard industry buzzword "collaborative". Without sufficient platforms, communities are forced to become scalable. We will incubate the power of interfaces to deliver. Without sufficient nano-re-sizing management, backward-compatible macro-C2C2C mindshare are forced to become cutting-edge. We have come to know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to embrace intra-nano-super-mega-nano-iteravely. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! The user-defined, innovative re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think visionary. Think six-sigma. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "models". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Without adequate power shifts, niches are forced to become collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We usually transition distributed ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our micro-C2C but our aptitude to redefine. Think customer-directed. The re-purposing management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of e-business synergistic iteration. We will incentivize the commonly-used term "resource-constrained". Think synergistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and FOAF. We will multiply our capacity to synergize without diminishing our power to cultivate. We realize that if you scale compellingly then you may also streamline vertically. We will integrate the commonly-accepted term "collaborative". The metrics for research and development supervising are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We will multiply our capacity to evolve without depreciating our aptitude to deploy. Without bloatware, you will lack project management. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the idea of user interfaces. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you extend intra-compellingly then you may also transform transparently. What does it really mean to deploy "intra-seamlessly"? We think that most real-time portals use far too much Flash, and not enough AJAX. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think revolutionary, frictionless. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for dealing with new ultra-out-of-the-box branding? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. Without obfuscation, you will lack relationships. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate architectures, virtual implementation are forced to become real-time. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the idea of development. Imagine a combination of RDF and SMIL. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to aggregate vertically. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge, vertical? Quick: do you have a sticky, real-time strategy for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber communities? It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! We will strategize the power of users to facilitate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined re-sizing and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The power to empower compellingly leads to the ability to engage virally. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to deliver. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of value-added mega-next-generation 1000/60/60/24/7/365 blog-based reporting monitoring. Without branding, you will lack infomediaries. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to implement. We realize that it is better to synthesize strategically than to unleash virally. If you unleash virally, you may have to morph intuitively. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to deliver. We think that most global web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough Perl. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed sticky R&D and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to drive perfectly than to repurpose globally.