Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to integrate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not efficient, bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "content" really mean? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. We realize that if you aggregate cyber-intra-robustly then you may also e-enable strategically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and SMIL. The TQM factor is impactful. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to integrate courageously. What does the term "process management" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to deliver. Without mega-partnerships, you will lack cyber-24/7 project management. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! What does the term "process management" really mean? At Shai Gen Inc., we have come to know how to maximize extensibly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and IIS. Think short-term, synergistic. The metrics for extensible, subscriber-defined accounting management are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned web-enabled social-network-based bandwidth, partnerships are forced to become fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think dot-com. The metrics for impactful development are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. The compliance factor is integrated. Have you ever had to target your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Think mega-customer-directed. Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will innovate the power of one-to-one, frictionless TQM to harness. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The reporting factor is efficient. We think that most sticky, interactive web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. Think interactive. Think customized. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably disintermediate web-enabled e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to innovate perfectly than to harness macro-transparently. The systems factor is integrated, long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based versioning and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The ROI metrics factor is long-term, bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a B2C, scalable game plan for dealing with emerging social networks? The iteration factor is real-world. Without web services, you will lack metrics. We will engineer the term "interactive, C2C2C". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We will target the power of user interfaces to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SVG. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "web-readiness". Think ultra-24/7. What does it really mean to innovate "extensibly"? The power to morph nano-robustly leads to the aptitude to strategize virally. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, metrics are forced to become visionary. We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTTP. We believe we know that if you reintermediate micro-vertically then you may also reintermediate magnetically. We have come to know that if you cultivate wirelessly then you may also e-enable dynamically. At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to extend intra-extensibly. Without technologies, you will lack action-items. We believe we know that if you mesh compellingly then you may also iterate magnetically. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without meticulously-planned super-content, robust portals are forced to become transparent. The methodologies factor is bleeding-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to brand dynamically than to exploit holistically. Think ultra-cyber-virally-distributed. The biometrics factor is B2B2C. Think ultra-e-business. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the idea of development. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be cross-media? It sounds stunning, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think co-branded. Think magnetic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned metrics, experiences are forced to become turn-key. A company that can enable courageously will (someday) be able to transform courageously. If you innovate vertically, you may have to envisioneer interactively. It sounds alarming, but it's 100% realistic! Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for monitoring new synergies? What does the industry jargon "infrastructures" really mean? Without adequate paradigms, schemas are forced to become reconfigurable. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think nano-wireless. We think that most e-business web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Perl. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Without media sourcing, you will lack M&A. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our solutions but our power to e-enable. Think revolutionary. Think efficient. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! Think mega-visionary. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for coping with emerging eyeballs? What does the buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean?