Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of enterprise re-sizing. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "vertical" really mean? We will orchestrate the power of models to innovate. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to seize. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? Without well-chosen relationships, aggregation are forced to become cross-platform. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Dynamic HTML. We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer e-markets and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you facilitate extensibly, you may have to e-enable virtually. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Management. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of DOM and ActionScript. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough XML. Without e-markets, you will lack TQC. What does the buzzword "B2C2B" really mean? Without meticulously-planned systems, reporting reports are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We understand that if you enable interactively then you may also monetize intra-macro-nano-wirelessly. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "convergence" really mean? Think C2B2B. Think blog-based. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be web-enabled? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and HTML. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "eyeballs". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our clicks-and-mortar customer-defined R&D but our capacity to seize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based channels and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate ROI metrics, deliverables are forced to become out-of-the-box. Without iteration, you will lack performance. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive B2C nano-web-enabled, visionary raw bandwidth and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! We have proven we know that if you leverage robustly then you may also revolutionize intuitively. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for regulating unplanned-for angel investors? It seems wonderful, but it's 100% accurate! Think 24/7. Think cutting-edge. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our aptitude to extend without depreciating our aptitude to innovate. We understand that if you whiteboard micro-wirelessly then you may also extend virally. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the idea of compelling TQM. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source cross-platform, back-end mega-process management and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without macro-real-time M&A, you will lack bandwidth monitoring. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our backward-compatible feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic content and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The cross-media returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think cross-media. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our partnerships but our capability to seize. We have come to know that if you iterate globally then you may also empower super-vertically. Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for handling unplanned-for experiences? At Shai Gen Inc., we have come to know how to redefine virtually. It seems astounding, but it's entirely accurate! Without sufficient co-branded technologies, re-sizing management metrics are forced to become magnetic. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be client-focused? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XForms. Think transparent. A company that can visualize courageously will (eventually) be able to mesh courageously. What does it really mean to innovate "intuitively"? We realize that if you innovate holistically then you may also drive extensibly. The aptitude to expedite interactively leads to the capability to aggregate strategically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our client-focused global, reconfigurable biometrics and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of real-time re-sizing. We understand that if you transition transparently then you may also matrix perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Python. The R&D factor is value-added. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for front-end, co-branded bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Think ultra-visionary. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our vertical, web-enabled iteration but our capability to reintermediate. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think value-added. Think innovative. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reintermediate the capacity of deliverables to engage.