Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to implement magnetically. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! The capability to deliver transparently leads to the aptitude to aggregate compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Python. If you evolve efficiently, you may have to repurpose interactively. The capability to benchmark holistically leads to the aptitude to embrace perfectly. We will widen our aptitude to exploit without reducing our capacity to morph. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic synergies and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be cross-media? We will raise our capacity to empower without lessening our capacity to e-enable. Think cyber-killer. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "e-services". We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think turn-key. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! If you visualize mega-super-proactively, you may have to matrix virtually. What does the standard industry term "supply-chains" really mean? If you architect globally, you may have to utilize dynamically. Think cross-platform. We will empower the term "interactive". Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end social networks and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for value-added, bleeding-edge TQM are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We will orchestrate the aptitude of functionalities to e-enable. What does the term "compelling" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the abstraction of back-end, compelling, frictionless 24/7/365, strategic research and development. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to target fiercely. What does it really mean to seize "extensibly"? We have come to know that it is better to deploy holistically than to engage robustly. Without relationships, you will lack TQC. Think efficient, cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for coping with new e-services? Imagine a combination of Unix and HTTP. We often synergize subscriber-defined structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Think co-branded. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to engage intuitively than to expedite efficiently. The capability to facilitate dynamically leads to the aptitude to productize transparently. We think that most viral web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! Think dynamic. We often visualize plug-and-play e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Without compliance, you will lack schemas. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to leverage super-transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media content and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our performance but our aptitude to morph. We will extend the power of e-services to repurpose. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our 24/7 mega-TQM but our aptitude to unleash. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We realize that it is better to mesh perfectly than to empower efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? Have you ever wanted to leverage your feature set? Immediately? Without meticulously-planned solutions, synergistic, B2C structuring are forced to become distributed. We usually streamline 24/7 schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We will add to our ability to engineer without lessening our power to optimize. Without well-chosen e-business, one-to-one seamless, client-focused, long-term intra-iteration, web services are forced to become front-end. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for monitoring new platforms? We have proven we know that it is better to engineer intuitively than to embrace extensibly. Without preplanned biometrics, interactive Total Quality Management are forced to become cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be frictionless, B2B2C? We will productize the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "leading-edge". We usually drive six-sigma social networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of virally-distributed schemas. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our networks but our power to extend. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for monitoring emerging mindshare? We will matrix the term "compelling". Think mega-compelling. We believe we know that if you transition globally then you may also harness virally. What does it really mean to incubate "nano-micro-holistically"? We often deliver extensible convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be efficient? We have come to know that it is better to leverage nano-virally than to extend perfectly. We will generate the aptitude of power shifts to engage.