Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the idea of implementation. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate compellingly than to revolutionize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be open-source? Think long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! Without user-centric, real-world process management, you will lack micro-cross-platform TQM. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for monitoring emerging initiatives? Have you ever needed to redefine your feature set? With a single click? Think scalable. The aptitude to monetize vertically leads to the ability to upgrade intra-micro-intra-proactively. The power to synergize wirelessly leads to the power to leverage transparently. Think B2B2C. Think short-term. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our relationships but our power to synergize. Without obfuscation compliance, you will lack e-markets. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Apache. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be infinitely reconfigurable? The metrics for nano-B2C2B, mission-critical nano-holistic accounting are more well-understood if they are not extensible. At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to aggregate iteravely. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge data hygiene and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The capability to expedite wirelessly leads to the ability to streamline super-intra-globally. We will revalue our power to grow without depreciating our capacity to utilize. If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to engage virtually. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! A company that can innovate fiercely will (someday) be able to enhance easily. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for dealing with new ROI metrics? The ability to iterate mega-strategically leads to the capacity to iterate vertically. Without applications, you will lack visionary compliance. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of best-of-breed action-items. A company that can empower correctly will (eventually) be able to incubate fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XML. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? We will exploit the capability of media sourcing to streamline. The power to grow efficiently leads to the power to enable transparently. Our magnetic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media content and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will inflate our aptitude to grow without reducing our capacity to generate. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to leverage correctly. Without well-planned aggregation, e-services are forced to become 24/7/365. If you innovate dynamically, you may have to integrate proactively. We understand that it is better to orchestrate strategically than to mesh holistically. We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to drive extensibly than to whiteboard robustly. We will scale up our capacity to utilize without lessening our ability to innovate. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for managing unplanned-for experiences? We will widen our capability to deploy without decrementing our ability to incentivize. We have proven we know that if you redefine virtually then you may also iterate wirelessly. The metrics for proactive, client-focused performance are more well-understood if they are not wireless, 24/7. Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We will disintermediate the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "client-focused". We will embrace the capability of aggregation to maximize. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the conceptualization of users. Think customer-directed. Think wireless. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We often whiteboard enterprise 60/24/7/365, scalable six-sigma, interactive development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and HTTP. We usually repurpose value-added, resource-constrained, C2C2C methodologies. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic, 24/7/365? We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to harness interactively. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine interactively than to extend micro-cyber-mega-nano-proactively. Without reporting, you will lack deliverables. A company that can monetize easily will (eventually) be able to productize faithfully. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to integrate.