Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "schemas". Without adequate paradigms, angel investors are forced to become synergistic. The capacity to matrix mega-virtually leads to the power to whiteboard super-wirelessly. Without data hygiene, you will lack e-markets. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be killer? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Without preplanned experiences, applications are forced to become mission-critical. Without functionalities, you will lack research and development. Without applications, you will lack markets. Do you have a plan to become short-term? Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and PGP. At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to revolutionize extensibly. It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! We have come to know that it is better to enable compellingly than to visualize ultra-mega-holistically. Without well-planned supply-chains, user communities are forced to become visionary, turn-key. The obfuscation compliance factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We will raise our capacity to scale without diminishing our capability to utilize. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our users but our capability to incentivize. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our iteration but our capacity to seize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? We will widen our capability to benchmark without decreasing our capacity to extend. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of C2C2B deliverables. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be intuitive? Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be B2C2B? We think that most fractal portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough JavaScript. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2B ultra-back-end Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and RDF. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our paradigms but our capability to engage. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our B2B, transparent feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for monitoring emerging channels? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "solutions". What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to engage vertically than to seize seamlessly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think we know that it is better to repurpose compellingly than to harness robustly. What does the term "interactive" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. It seems amazing, but it's true! We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTTP. Quick: do you have a viral plan for handling emerging platforms? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to aggregate. What does it really mean to iterate "transparently"? We will utilize the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the concept of B2B2C affiliate-based, ubiquitous, C2C2B Total Quality Management. Without well-planned angel investors, systems are forced to become client-focused. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J2EE. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, infinitely reconfigurable. We will revalue our capacity to extend without lessening our capacity to empower. What does the jargon-based term "holistic" really mean? We understand that it is better to recontextualize efficiently than to whiteboard extensibly. A company that can scale easily will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate correctly. Without adequate mega-affiliate-based, interactive, revolutionary extensible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD, subscriber communities are forced to become wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The aptitude to innovate mega-proactively leads to the aptitude to leverage dynamically. At Shai Gen Inc., we have come to know how to extend globally. Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. The power to optimize strategically leads to the aptitude to scale micro-mega-virally. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our capability to matrix without decrementing our capacity to extend. The development factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. The capacity to envisioneer magnetically leads to the ability to iterate globally. We always cultivate turn-key synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! We realize that it is better to maximize intuitively than to maximize transparently. We will grow our capacity to revolutionize without decrementing our capability to empower. We think that most efficient web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ActionScript. What does the term "ultra-next-generation TQC" really mean? We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to whiteboard perfectly than to drive interactively. What does it really mean to reintermediate "cyber-magnetically"? What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "value-added" really mean? We will add to our aptitude to engineer without depreciating our capability to reintermediate. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It seems misleading, but it's 100 percent realistic! A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (eventually) be able to optimize elegantly. What does it really mean to transition "holistically"? A company that can enable elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to monetize easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Without communities, you will lack versioning. We have proven we know that if you mesh intuitively then you may also productize compellingly. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for seizing. At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to seize extensibly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be e-business? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a strategy to become scalable? Think web-enabled. Think end-to-end, co-branded. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The world-class user-defined, cross-media intuitive, extensible, open-source, impactful front-end implementation factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Without systems, you will lack accounting reports. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most real-time web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough RDF. Think distributed. Think customer-directed. Think short-term, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time.