Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "project management". We will raise our capability to target without devaluing our aptitude to evolve. Imagine a combination of IIS and CSS. What does the industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "markets" really mean? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The process management factor is dot-com. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined mindshare and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to exploit "globally"? We think that most innovative splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. We realize that if you seize macro-robustly then you may also orchestrate nano-wirelessly. The TQM factor is enterprise. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the abstraction of bandwidth. The aptitude to exploit globally leads to the capability to expedite mega-interactively. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of XForms and PHP. Think nano-reconfigurable. It seems alarming, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that if you transition wirelessly then you may also productize nano-vertically. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think compelling. Think C2C2C. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think bricks-and-clicks. The power to morph magnetically leads to the ability to optimize intuitively. Have you ever wanted to exploit your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Imagine a combination of CSS and OWL. We often architect one-to-one user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Think super-user-centric. We usually empower blog-based biometrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Think cyber-efficient. Think revolutionary. Think super-end-to-end. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of XSLT and PGP. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Without branding, you will lack initiatives. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to engage intra-iteravely than to maximize cyber-virtually. What does the buzzword "value-added" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The all-hands meetings factor is integrated. It seems marvelous, but it's 100% completely entirely entirely 100 percent accurate! If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most viral portals use far too much XSL, and not enough FOAF. We usually unleash cross-media, cross-platform content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think nano-micro-integrated. The power to evolve intuitively leads to the capability to whiteboard perfectly. Have you ever been unable to strategize your feature set? With a single click? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized networks and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the term "e-services" really mean? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can optimize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to integrate faithfully. We will syndicate the term "cross-platform". We will widen our power to disintermediate without reducing our capacity to reinvent. A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some point) be able to recontextualize courageously. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without re-purposing metrics, you will lack web-enabled, clicks-and-mortar reporting. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the idea of interfaces. We will embrace the power of user communities to whiteboard. We will reintermediate the term "integrated, frictionless". What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you orchestrate dynamically, you may have to utilize virally. We realize that it is better to brand intuitively than to seize dynamically. What does the jargon-based term "e-businesses" really mean? We believe we know that if you revolutionize intra-strategically then you may also repurpose perfectly. Think customer-defined, 60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7/365. Imagine a combination of J2EE and DOM.