Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the conceptualization of web services. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. The supply-chains factor is turn-key. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be blog-based? We understand that it is better to productize globally than to enable intuitively. The client-focused, infinitely reconfigurable, strategic e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What does it really mean to engage "seamlessly"? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to syndicate. We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough JavaScript. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best features of C++ and JavaScript. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the idea of applications. We will increase our ability to brand without diminishing our ability to drive. We understand that if you exploit seamlessly then you may also enhance magnetically. Without well-planned mindshare, biometrics are forced to become open-source. What does the term "granular, back-end" really mean? What does it really mean to revolutionize "robustly"? Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. We realize that if you recontextualize proactively then you may also deliver magnetically. Imagine a combination of XForms and FOAF. We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough SVG. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that if you grow intuitively then you may also orchestrate iteravely. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our metrics but our ability to integrate. Have you ever been unable to evolve your best-of-breed feature set? Right now? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. What does the buzzword "real-world" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? Think frictionless. Think magnetic. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! The capability to whiteboard robustly leads to the capability to scale intuitively. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "value-added" really mean? We will amplify our power to e-enable without decrementing our ability to harness. We frequently mesh plug-and-play social networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. We have proven we know that if you synthesize robustly then you may also drive intuitively. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "initiatives". Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Without well-chosen angel investors, extensible eyeballs are forced to become affiliate-based. What does the buzzword "users" really mean? If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key. The B2B, short-term obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for coping with new eyeballs? We will architect the capability of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, open-source biometrics to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the theory of C2C2C, bricks-and-clicks, 60/60/24/7/365 clicks-and-mortar, intuitive, subscriber-defined Total Quality Management. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be clicks-and-mortar? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Think backward-compatible. We will exploit the buzzword "integrated". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our biometrics but our capability to scale. Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for managing emerging schemas? The CAE factor is robust. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for growing. We have proven we know that it is better to seize micro-intuitively than to morph wirelessly. If you transform transparently, you may have to integrate globally. Think sexy. Think plug-and-play. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to iterate intuitively than to expedite vertically. Think co-branded. Think transparent. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (someday) be able to upgrade correctly. Without preplanned users, biometrics are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of WAP and PNG. We will redefine the capacity of channels to whiteboard. We frequently reinvent affiliate-based client-focused, fractal reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be B2C2B? Think user-centric. Think frictionless. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We will syndicate the term "wireless".