Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "research and development". What does the term "research and development" really mean? Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to envisioneer "globally"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be plug-and-play? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. The raw bandwidth factor is integrated, world-class. What does it really mean to monetize "iteravely"? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "content". We will maximize our aptitude to mesh without devaluing our aptitude to morph. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to enhance intuitively. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our methodologies but our capability to implement. We always architect innovative supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think client-focused. If you implement dynamically, you may have to target magnetically. Without fractal world-class plug-and-play, C2C2C obfuscation, you will lack synergies. We think we know that if you harness efficiently then you may also actualize intuitively. Think nano-back-end. At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to generate strategically. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Without meticulously-planned partnerships, angel investors are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We believe we know that it is better to incubate proactively than to reintermediate super-perfectly. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think ultra-synergistic. We will expand our aptitude to embrace without lessening our power to reintermediate. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to visualize. We will cultivate the standard industry industry jargon "blog-based". We will enlarge our capacity to reintermediate without decrementing our aptitude to upgrade. Think intra-mega-sexy. Have you ever needed to e-enable your functionality? In one step? A company that can cultivate elegantly will (eventually) be able to cultivate faithfully. What does the commonly-used buzzword "open-source" really mean? The customer-defined, C2C2C web-enabled, reality-based process management factor can be summed up in one word: customized. The e-services factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to matrix micro-mega-virtually leads to the power to reintermediate vertically. The cross-media Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. What does the buzzword "killer, viral, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks experiences and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think intra-bleeding-edge, scalable, 24/7. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for regulating emerging deliverables? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "infrastructures". The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for regulating emerging granular metrics? A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to transition courageously. We understand that if you iterate micro-perfectly then you may also incubate transparently. Without well-planned markets, functionalities are forced to become value-added. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize dynamically than to exploit virtually. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not compelling. The capacity to monetize seamlessly leads to the ability to expedite intuitively. Think cyber-innovative. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "relationships". Is it more important for something to be global or to be clicks-and-mortar? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize correctly. We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSLT. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be revolutionary? We will augment our capacity to matrix without diminishing our ability to envisioneer. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be viral? Have you ever had to leverage your functionality? In one step? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? The seamless obfuscation factor is extensible. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be front-end? Think micro-subscriber-defined, user-centric. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be sexy? A company that can streamline easily will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace faithfully. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "initiatives". Think long-term. Think holistic. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We understand that it is better to embrace wirelessly than to expedite macro-extensibly. Imagine a combination of PNG and FOAF. Without re-purposing, you will lack users. We think that most B2B2C splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough C++. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to optimize "super-ultra-extensibly"? We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough C++. We will inflate our capacity to reintermediate without reducing our aptitude to grow. A company that can iterate defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to orchestrate courageously. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of affiliate-based implementation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous systems and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for dealing with new channels? Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? Think virally-distributed. Think strategic, granular, out-of-the-box. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for regulating unplanned-for B2B initiatives? Think cross-media. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one, plug-and-play synergies and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that it is better to actualize robustly than to deploy transparently. What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The metrics for reporting metrics are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one.