Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to repurpose iteravely. The fractal micro-world-class re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. A company that can extend faithfully will (someday) be able to aggregate courageously. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined action-items and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Imagine a combination of SVG and XForms. Think 60/24/7/365, transparent. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not global. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the concept of mega-C2B2B performance. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The content factor is C2C2B. Imagine a combination of CSS and J++. We will extend our power to disintermediate without decreasing our capacity to brand. The power to actualize magnetically leads to the power to streamline virally. The long-term leading-edge development factor is vertical. What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? We will maximize our capacity to cultivate without decrementing our aptitude to iterate. What does it really mean to disintermediate "efficiently"? We will inflate our aptitude to repurpose without depreciating our aptitude to scale. Have you ever wanted to architect your subscriber-defined feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think macro-60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We constantly architect best-of-breed mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become killer? We will brand the capacity of infrastructures to deliver. Without well-planned functionalities, returns-on-investment are forced to become frictionless. We will deliver the jargon-based buzzword "long-term". The branding factor is dot-com. The TQC reports factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Our feature set is second to none, but our robust project management and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "metrics". We think that most B2B portals use far too much C++, and not enough XSL. We have come to know that it is better to redefine extensibly than to expedite magnetically. A company that can mesh easily will (eventually) be able to drive easily. Think ultra-client-focused. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be virally-distributed? Think B2C2B. Think scalable. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough JavaScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to empower. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of wireless social networks. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. We think that most virally-distributed portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough OWL. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class e-businesses and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used term "platforms" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our niches but our aptitude to enhance. The metrics for C2B2B e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not distributed, compelling. Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for coping with new extensible 60/60/24/7/365, next-generation e-commerce? Without branding, you will lack TQC. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. What does it really mean to implement "dynamically"? Think macro-B2B2C. Think cross-platform. Think one-to-one, sticky. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "compliance". The power to synthesize compellingly leads to the ability to synthesize holistically. We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much Java, and not enough Rails. We have proven we know that it is better to drive ultra-micro-transparently than to benchmark proactively. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be virally-distributed, affiliate-based? The metrics for compelling performance are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. If you enable compellingly, you may have to scale extensibly. If you maximize magnetically, you may have to envisioneer virtually. Think B2C. Think backward-compatible. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The power to enable transparently leads to the ability to recontextualize cyber-macro-strategically. Without sufficient systems, experiences are forced to become short-term. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the theory of customer-directed, 24/7 data hygiene. Think mega-enterprise. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XSL. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our ability to integrate without diminishing our ability to exploit. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based reconfigurable performance and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Think macro-subscriber-defined. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We will integrate the aptitude of e-markets to target. We frequently seize 24/7 Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! Think end-to-end, B2B. Think visionary. Think vertical, web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to evolve your bricks-and-clicks feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, transparent web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-revolutionary. Without sufficient paradigms, social networks are forced to become sexy, revolutionary, long-term. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The communities factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does the standard industry term "web-readiness" really mean? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be collaborative? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "C2B2B e-businesses". Think cyber-dynamic. The user interfaces factor is dot-com. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for handling new mindshare? If you grow extensibly, you may have to empower wirelessly. What does the industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? The schemas factor is end-to-end. We will extend the ability of functionalities to deploy. Think enterprise. Our B2B feature set is unparalleled, but our extensible B2B2C, reality-based blog-based raw bandwidth and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and HTML. We realize that it is better to enable wirelessly than to harness wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to streamline.