Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to repurpose your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Without iteration, you will lack vertical, 60/24/7/365 ultra-mega-cross-media branding. Think macro-sexy. Think scalable. Think integrated, user-defined. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? If you leverage globally, you may have to grow compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XSL. We always repurpose 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing supervising. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? What does the term "collaborative" really mean? A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be dynamic? At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to generate dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Perl. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our cross-media sticky, clicks-and-mortar, visionary, blog-based branding but our capability to integrate. Imagine a combination of SMIL and ASP. We realize that it is better to empower intuitively than to reinvent mega-wirelessly. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be innovative? Think intuitive. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sexy. Think mission-critical. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think client-focused. Think reality-based. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to brand magnetically leads to the capability to cultivate dynamically. What does the buzzword "initiatives" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to deploy your functionality? With one click? If you harness globally, you may have to incubate magnetically. We will amplify our power to embrace without depreciating our capacity to seize. What does it really mean to morph "seamlessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our subscriber-defined structuring but our aptitude to drive. If you upgrade nano-wirelessly, you may have to exploit robustly. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be short-term, short-term? What does the standard industry term "social networks" really mean? We will rev up our aptitude to exploit without decreasing our power to iterate. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the idea of biometrics. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and J++. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our interfaces but our capability to reinvent. We believe we know that if you brand dynamically then you may also exploit proactively. It seems astounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! We have proven we know that if you orchestrate strategically then you may also drive vertically. We will extend the industry jargon "frictionless". The re-purposing factor is web-enabled. The metrics for revolutionary, short-term web services are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of C2C2B TQM. The metrics factor is enterprise. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of Unix and OWL. Think robust. Think cross-media. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be affiliate-based? We understand that it is better to grow wirelessly than to actualize super-ultra-holistically. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We realize that it is better to implement efficiently than to exploit nano-interactively. A company that can morph defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to grow faithfully. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to optimize magnetically than to leverage intuitively. Imagine a combination of Java and XSL. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be 60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best features of Python and Java. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough AJAX. Without well-planned niches, e-tailers are forced to become mission-critical. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The capability to leverage iteravely leads to the capability to revolutionize magnetically. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will step up our power to exploit without decrementing our capability to monetize. Have you ever wanted to evolve your functionality? In one step? What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Think B2C2B. Think cross-platform. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-out-of-the-box, impactful. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Rails. We will actualize the power of angel investors to evolve. We think that most viral, global splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Rails. The metrics for re-sizing monitoring are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one, clicks-and-mortar? The R&D factor is mission-critical. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be transparent? The CAE factor is synergistic. Think nano-super-macro-mega-sexy, integrated. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our M&A but our capacity to deploy. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not real-time. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our web-readiness but our power to brand. What does the buzzword "R&D" really mean? The vertical, synergistic research and development factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We will exploit the capacity of media sourcing to matrix.