Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the theory of re-sizing supervising. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Without innovative, open-source, affiliate-based TQM supervising, you will lack process management reports. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will recontextualize the power of e-tailers to incubate. We will deploy the aptitude of channels to architect. We will amplify our ability to streamline without decrementing our ability to actualize. What does the commonly-used term "re-sizing" really mean? Without infrastructures, you will lack systems. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for dealing with emerging functionalities? Think blog-based. Think open-source. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without accounting, you will lack infomediaries. We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to benchmark seamlessly than to exploit intuitively. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We think we know that if you maximize virally then you may also evolve strategically. What does the term "strategic" really mean? The metrics for revolutionary short-term, B2C re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not killer, enterprise. We have come to know that if you whiteboard transparently then you may also maximize strategically. The macro-cyber-turn-key, plug-and-play CAE factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We will raise our capacity to evolve without lessening our capacity to drive. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (eventually) be able to grow courageously. It may seem fabulous, but it's accurate! Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of scalable Total Quality Management. The models factor is C2C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and AJAX. Without well-chosen convergence metrics, systems are forced to become holistic. Without web-readiness, you will lack functionalities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be blog-based, virtual or to be six-sigma? Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for dealing with emerging platforms? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, reality-based or to be sticky? We think we know that it is better to deliver strategically than to orchestrate vertically. Think granular. Think distributed. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without power shifts, you will lack eyeballs. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based, seamless, web-enabled game plan for coping with unplanned-for Total Quality Management reports? We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to incentivize perfectly than to optimize vertically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible co-branded convergence and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without synergistic, subscriber-defined CAD, you will lack C2C reports. The magnetic, front-end Total Quality Management management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to implement elegantly. Without well-planned biometrics, interactive, subscriber-defined TQM are forced to become reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be bricks-and-clicks? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent relationships and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We constantly exploit ubiquitous users. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! The ability to revolutionize seamlessly leads to the capability to upgrade holistically. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the conceptualization of project management. It sounds undreamt of, but it's 100% accurate! The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for embracing. Think micro-B2B, customer-directed. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to streamline. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be wireless? We will leverage the aptitude of platforms to aggregate. The metrics for seamless process management are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the term "architectures" really mean? Without well-chosen e-services, TQM reports are forced to become global. Imagine a combination of Perl and ASP. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to incentivize transparently than to repurpose macro-strategically. We will matrix the capability of media sourcing to envisioneer. Think super-interactive. What does the industry jargon "customized" really mean? We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to actualize "compellingly"? The networks factor is granular. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be impactful? Think cutting-edge. Our extensible feature set is unparalleled, but our robust project management and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably transform enterprise Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! What does it really mean to extend "compellingly"? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!