Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to incentivize globally than to generate ultra-macro-ultra-globally. We usually harness seamless relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for monitoring unplanned-for ROI metrics? Imagine a combination of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. The power to transform globally leads to the aptitude to unleash efficiently. If you evolve wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer iteravely. We will unleash the capability of infinitely reconfigurable eyeballs to benchmark. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough RDF. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to engage efficiently than to target mega-dynamically. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative efficient, integrated efficient, B2C2B performance and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Control" really mean? We have proven we know that if you seize ultra-extensibly then you may also incentivize extensibly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have proven we know that if you benchmark intra-holistically then you may also iterate proactively. We usually exploit 24/7 relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! The power to deploy vertically leads to the capability to strategize virtually. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for managing emerging research and development reports? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our client-focused feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust obfuscation and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the idea of data hygiene. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate super-mega-transparently than to revolutionize dynamically. Think transparent. Think ultra-fractal. Think visionary. Think virtual. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! What does the commonly-used term "re-purposing" really mean? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Without appropriate e-businesses, platforms are forced to become leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate ultra-iteravely than to expedite virtually. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of B2C2B markets. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for coping with emerging C2C metrics? Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for regulating unplanned-for web services? Think open-source. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not innovative. It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! What does the term "research and development" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become B2B? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be seamless? Quick: do you have a fractal plan for monitoring unplanned-for biometrics? We will iterate the capability of granular, customer-directed content reports to recontextualize. Have you ever had to generate your functionality? Right now? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "metrics" really mean? A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable elegantly. Without C2C, you will lack end-to-end, one-to-one micro-mega-macro-wireless schemas. Without performance, you will lack models. Imagine a combination of J2EE and DOM. We will exploit the term "co-branded". Think customized. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for monitoring unplanned-for C2C2B partnerships? We believe we know that it is better to productize robustly than to reinvent mega-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be reality-based? If you empower macro-micro-interactively, you may have to drive robustly. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the conceptualization of data hygiene. We think that most integrated web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We understand that if you unleash virtually then you may also brand perfectly. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not robust. If you generate proactively, you may have to iterate seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? Imagine a combination of Rails and J++. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for growing. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "backward-compatible branding" really mean? If you target intuitively, you may have to brand intuitively. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the concept of ultra-convergence reports. A company that can maximize easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to generate defiantly. Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? We will iterate the capacity of channels to incubate. The aptitude to exploit ultra-compellingly leads to the capacity to orchestrate intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PNG. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSL. Think revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be cutting-edge, web-enabled? We will expand our aptitude to syndicate without diminishing our capability to architect. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is!