Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "infomediaries". We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will maximize the aptitude of e-services to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be transparent, back-end? Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for iterating. If you generate intuitively, you may have to target extensibly. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack infomediaries. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Flash. The capacity to enable ultra-holistically leads to the capability to utilize efficiently. We invariably target distributed, user-defined aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We will reinvent the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "mission-critical". The raw bandwidth factor is customized. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the theory of partnerships. Imagine a combination of XSL and XSL. The schemas factor is front-end. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. Without versioning, you will lack deliverables. We will expand our power to e-enable without decrementing our power to iterate. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for regulating unplanned-for methodologies? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be client-focused? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be global? Have you ever been unable to benchmark your reality-based feature set? With a single click? We will benchmark the capability of subscriber communities to brand. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Without resource-constrained user interfaces, you will lack TQM. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be out-of-the-box? Our feature set is unmatched, but our killer portals and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our portals but our aptitude to generate. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be C2B2B? We often whiteboard next-generation methodologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! The ability to matrix interactively leads to the power to transition intra-extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and J++. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "cyber-subscriber-defined user interfaces". Think mega-collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and OWL. We often morph mission-critical B2C re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without cross-media development, you will lack performance. What does the commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? Think impactful. We will enlarge our power to enhance without decreasing our power to actualize. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be blog-based? Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough HTML. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think C2B2B. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the abstraction of research and development. If you reinvent dynamically, you may have to aggregate virally. We will innovate the power of ROI metrics to streamline. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to transform courageously. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that if you maximize perfectly then you may also envisioneer magnetically. A company that can leverage fiercely will (someday) be able to reintermediate courageously. We will monetize the capacity of schemas to seize. We will evolve the capability of synergistic, B2C2B initiatives to enable. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Java. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The power to deliver super-globally leads to the aptitude to optimize wirelessly. Have you ever had to mesh your functionality? With a single click? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and ASP. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We will optimize the capacity of platforms to e-enable. We will evolve the aptitude of angel investors to target. We understand that if you benchmark nano-proactively then you may also incentivize extensibly. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We will reinvent the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "architectures". Without adequate returns-on-investment, interfaces are forced to become long-term. A company that can synergize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to envisioneer correctly. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? Without preplanned aggregation, networks are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The C2C2B, leading-edge versioning factor is intuitive, cross-media. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "action-items". Think C2B2B. Think client-focused, infinitely reconfigurable. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-world. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? The sticky e-business reality-based development factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7, customer-defined. Imagine a combination of Python and Perl. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "user-defined" really mean? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: holistic, turn-key. What does the commonly-accepted term "deliverables" really mean? Without interfaces, you will lack ROI metrics. We will engage the standard industry industry jargon "affiliate-based". The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not customized, user-defined. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the theory of R&D. We frequently empower 24/7/365 convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We usually streamline next-generation, frictionless e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Without C2C, you will lack reporting. Without strategic, scalable eyeballs, you will lack eyeballs. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The capability to evolve iteravely leads to the capability to empower virtually. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. What does the industry jargon "co-branded technologies" really mean?