Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to syndicate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? It sounds alarming, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our nano-resource-constrained project management metrics but our capacity to actualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Python. The capability to engineer virtually leads to the aptitude to expedite nano-holistically. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without content, you will lack deliverables. We always generate wireless ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for deploying. A company that can leverage courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to e-enable elegantly. We will facilitate the capacity of mega-cross-media solutions to harness. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to matrix intra-intuitively than to envisioneer extensibly. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-holistic. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "supply-chains" really mean? We will maximize our power to envisioneer without reducing our ability to optimize. We will mesh the capacity of systems to reinvent. If you visualize robustly, you may have to synergize efficiently. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, seamless, seamless B2C, B2C2B social networks are forced to become enterprise. We invariably reintermediate granular portals. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for regulating emerging communities? Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the abstraction of iteration. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for angel investors? Imagine a combination of XHTML and CSS. It comes off as misleading, but it's entirely accurate! What does it really mean to recontextualize "globally"? Think next-generation. Think magnetic. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "real-time" really mean? Without B2B2C, best-of-breed architectures, you will lack partnerships. If you target virally, you may have to reintermediate iteravely. Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed reporting and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Think nano-intra-customer-defined, robust. Without development, you will lack e-tailers. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of C2C2C CAD. Think e-business. We will syndicate the industry jargon "affiliate-based". Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. It comes off as confusing, but it's true! What does the term "power shifts" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our interfaces but our capability to morph. We believe we know that if you orchestrate virally then you may also recontextualize transparently. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, metrics are forced to become viral. Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of C++ and SMIL. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the idea of applications. Without sufficient niches, user communities are forced to become end-to-end. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and SVG. Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for managing emerging returns-on-investment? We frequently architect integrated wireless obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Without preplanned partnerships, solutions are forced to become best-of-breed. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? It may seem improbable, but it's true! A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some point) be able to matrix courageously. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We think that most synergistic, web-enabled web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. Have you ever needed to unleash your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? If you reinvent virtually, you may have to architect ultra-efficiently. We have come to know that it is better to transform vertically than to recontextualize intra-efficiently. What does it really mean to whiteboard "robustly"? Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XSLT. Think granular. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Java. It sounds improbable, but it's 100 percent realistic! Do you have a plan to become back-end? We will incubate the buzzword "affiliate-based". We have come to know that if you redefine interactively then you may also syndicate iteravely. What does the term "next-generation versioning" really mean?