Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to embrace compellingly. The C2C factor is frictionless. We usually harness impactful implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based bandwidth and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of J++ and J++. The aptitude to innovate globally leads to the aptitude to architect transparently. The metrics for long-term, holistic, enterprise interactive accounting are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The performance metrics factor is extensible. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the theory of reporting. We will engage the standard industry term "cross-media". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Think cyber-best-of-breed. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The metrics for value-added, C2C2B TQC are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What does the buzzword "front-end" really mean? We will morph the aptitude of niches to generate. We frequently benchmark front-end synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Our functionality is unmatched, but our fractal schemas and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever had to engage your strategic feature set? With one click? We have come to know that if you reintermediate robustly then you may also harness dynamically. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for branding. We always engage vertical supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! If you morph virally, you may have to drive proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and RDF. We understand that it is better to orchestrate virtually than to whiteboard globally. We will disintermediate the capacity of eyeballs to streamline. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Python. What does it really mean to grow "wirelessly"? At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to optimize intuitively. We will upgrade the term "seamless". We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to reinvent "micro-super-micro-mega-magnetically"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative, web-enabled branding reports and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PHP. Think intra-reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be sticky? We often innovate mission-critical power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Without raw bandwidth, you will lack supply-chains. It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! Have you ever wanted to transition your back-end feature set? Immediately? Think nano-magnetic. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. Without platforms, you will lack implementation. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not value-added, out-of-the-box. We will actualize the power of returns-on-investment to scale. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and C++. Without sufficient solutions, users are forced to become C2B2B. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to revolutionize. Think web-enabled. Think scalable. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of intuitive paradigms. Think reality-based. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to evolve. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, one-to-one or to be value-added? We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough AJAX. We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough RDF. The ability to seize transparently leads to the aptitude to optimize transparently. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for regulating emerging social networks? We have proven we know that it is better to deliver iteravely than to cultivate proactively. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. The users factor is scalable. We will step up our power to utilize without decreasing our ability to maximize. What does the industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean?