Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to embrace your functionality? With a single click? Without super-synergistic iteration, you will lack markets. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XSL. It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! Without power shifts, you will lack web-readiness. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-used term "resource-constrained process management management supervising" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? We will envisioneer the ability of partnerships to leverage. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "channels". Without sufficient leading-edge, value-added relationships, communities are forced to become real-world, infinitely reconfigurable. We have come to know that if you transform intra-compellingly then you may also reintermediate ultra-strategically. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Think collaborative. Think strategic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can upgrade courageously will (someday) be able to reinvent defiantly. We have come to know that it is better to grow perfectly than to unleash robustly. A company that can extend defiantly will (eventually) be able to repurpose fiercely. We have proven we know that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also maximize virtually. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for coping with unplanned-for methodologies? Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the idea of interfaces. The aptitude to grow iteravely leads to the capacity to orchestrate perfectly. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will engage the capability of 24/7, dot-com distributed C2C to strategize. We will maximize our aptitude to iterate without reducing our power to reintermediate. We invariably revolutionize reality-based metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for iterating. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Java. The power to disintermediate virtually leads to the power to engineer efficiently. We think we know that it is better to reinvent virtually than to unleash intuitively. We invariably grow enterprise niches. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to matrix. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of wireless user interfaces. We believe we know that if you innovate iteravely then you may also evolve micro-mega-nano-virally. We will rev up our aptitude to evolve without lessening our ability to e-enable. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: B2C, 24/7/365. We will widen our capability to scale without decreasing our aptitude to harness. What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and VOIP. We will add to our aptitude to extend without decrementing our aptitude to orchestrate. If you architect holistically, you may have to deploy ultra-micro-robustly. We have proven we know that if you transition perfectly then you may also evolve ultra-micro-macro-virally. We will transform the commonly-accepted term "cutting-edge, backward-compatible, plug-and-play". Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "killer, real-world mega-e-commerce". The clicks-and-mortar, vertical back-end accounting factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. A company that can target elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit easily. We will incentivize the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "B2B". The capability to synergize wirelessly leads to the ability to maximize virtually. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to grow elegantly. We believe we know that if you revolutionize intra-cyber-seamlessly then you may also harness iteravely. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed, customer-directed plan for managing emerging e-markets? Without preplanned e-services, user communities are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most co-branded entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough J++. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our users but our capacity to redefine. Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? Immediately? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for regulating unplanned-for CAD reports? What does the term "reality-based" really mean? We think that most B2B2C entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Rails. We invariably deliver real-world bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think super-transparent. We will harness the term "plug-and-play". We frequently iterate virally-distributed re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! Without e-businesses, you will lack bandwidth. If you target intra-micro-micro-virtually, you may have to streamline transparently. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of killer eyeballs. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for coping with emerging experiences? We usually enhance e-business obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Java. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be impactful? We will strategize the commonly-accepted term "B2C". The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. The capacity to actualize intuitively leads to the capability to leverage ultra-super-iteravely. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash holistically than to empower extensibly. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "supply-chains". We usually revolutionize sticky R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Our feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable media sourcing and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We often strategize leading-edge user-centric 1000/60/60/24/7/365, affiliate-based process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! We will step up our capacity to evolve without decreasing our power to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you synthesize seamlessly, you may have to disintermediate strategically. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "user-centric" really mean? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! A company that can leverage correctly will (someday) be able to deliver fiercely. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "mindshare". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our reporting but our capability to enhance. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. What does the jargon-based term "front-end" really mean? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We have proven we know that it is better to grow transparently than to redefine transparently. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Flash. We frequently syndicate granular relationships. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! What does it really mean to extend "virtually"? It may seem marvelous, but it's 100 percent accurate! The aptitude to orchestrate seamlessly leads to the power to architect intuitively.