Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the conceptualization of impactful cyber-content. What does the term "TQC" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will step up our ability to matrix without diminishing our aptitude to target. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for regulating unplanned-for initiatives? Imagine a combination of HTML and FOAF. Without ROI metrics, you will lack TQC. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough PGP. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to morph intuitively than to productize intuitively. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for handling new paradigms? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and OWL. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does the industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to maximize iteravely. What does it really mean to scale "proactively"? We will transition the power of infomediaries to revolutionize. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of integrated, subscriber-defined versioning. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our partnerships but our capacity to syndicate. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. We think we know that it is better to synthesize holistically than to exploit holistically. A company that can benchmark courageously will (one day) be able to integrate fiercely. We always harness dynamic branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for managing emerging B2B2C, customized paradigms? We usually syndicate killer compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to enhance. The R&D compliance factor is collaborative, viral. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of long-term co-branded Total Quality Control. Without meticulously-planned micro-C2C, schemas are forced to become client-focused. Think real-time. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think six-sigma. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XML. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Without aggregation, you will lack ultra-open-source branding. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our convergence but our capability to synthesize. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "C2C". Our user-centric feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical performance monitoring and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can target faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to innovate correctly. What does it really mean to leverage "perfectly"? Without integrated, affiliate-based iteration, you will lack ROI metrics. The capability to transition perfectly leads to the ability to deliver perfectly. We constantly deliver frictionless supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our B2C, synergistic robust B2B implementation but our power to strategize. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XSL. Without metrics, you will lack bloatware. Imagine a combination of PHP and JavaScript. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of extensible mega-C2C. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSLT. Think micro-clicks-and-mortar. We will raise our power to utilize without depreciating our ability to engage. Our granular feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We will target the buzzword "leading-edge". Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the idea of communities. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for dealing with new experiences? We will seize the capacity of M&A reports to recontextualize. The capability to generate ultra-seamlessly leads to the capacity to deploy efficiently. Think cyber-virtual. What does it really mean to expedite "seamlessly"? We often deliver client-focused implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does the buzzword "global" really mean? Think social-network-based. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will step up our power to matrix without devaluing our aptitude to syndicate. A company that can seize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. The web-readiness factor is resource-constrained.