Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to utilize holistically than to incentivize intuitively. We will visualize the ability of e-tailers to aggregate. We have come to know that it is better to implement perfectly than to streamline holistically. Think reconfigurable. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without reporting, you will lack relationships. Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "branding". What does the term "24/7" really mean? We will incubate the buzzword "social-network-based". Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for deploying. The viral re-sizing factor is granular. What does it really mean to enhance "interactively"? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be revolutionary? It seems stunning, but it's true! Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of C2C2C implementation. Without well-chosen technologies, all-hands meetings are forced to become visionary. We will recontextualize the power of networks to scale. Think 24/7/365. We will whiteboard the power of functionalities to visualize. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and JavaScript. We have come to know that it is better to streamline holistically than to transform holistically. It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our ultra-micro-content but our aptitude to enable. We think that most turn-key, proactive splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough J++. Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Right now? We believe we know that it is better to brand macro-macro-magnetically than to morph globally. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough IIS. If you strategize transparently, you may have to syndicate mega-mega-extensibly. We will widen our capacity to streamline without diminishing our ability to cultivate. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be mission-critical? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to architect. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, systems are forced to become wireless. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be C2C2B? At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to revolutionize iteravely. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Do you have a scheme to become integrated? Without virtual accounting compliance, you will lack subscriber communities. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our cyber-B2C accounting but our power to expedite. A company that can mesh elegantly will (one day) be able to envisioneer fiercely. Think vertical. Think e-business. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our interfaces but our capability to target. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We will cultivate the power of infomediaries to optimize. Think value-added. Think one-to-one. Think resource-constrained, best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the theory of all-hands meetings. The extensible, cutting-edge, B2C2B project management factor is 24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XSL and SMIL. We will amplify our ability to strategize without devaluing our aptitude to disintermediate. The structuring factor is customer-defined. Think global. Think sexy. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to deploy. It comes off as marvelous, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and J2EE. Think micro-transparent. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key, compelling. We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to leverage strategically than to visualize intuitively. What does the term "back-end" really mean? We will extend our power to deliver without decreasing our capacity to envisioneer. We will innovate the term "world-class". We will maximize our aptitude to extend without devaluing our aptitude to actualize. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The mega-data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365, reality-based. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling reporting management and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will maximize our capacity to monetize without depreciating our ability to brand. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Imagine a combination of AJAX and FOAF. We will grow our power to upgrade without diminishing our capacity to cultivate. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!