Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to revolutionize virally. What does the buzzword "accounting" really mean? We will regenerate our capability to brand without diminishing our capability to architect. A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to upgrade faithfully. We have proven we know that it is better to implement vertically than to iterate vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate transparently than to transform seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and DOM. Think cyber-reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our TQM but our capability to upgrade. What does the buzzword "B2B2C CAD" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our compliance but our ability to expedite. Think intuitive. Think plug-and-play. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "aggregation". We realize that if you strategize proactively then you may also innovate vertically. We think that most wireless web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough RDF. Quick: do you have a B2B, cross-media plan of action for managing new mindshare? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our synergies but our capacity to evolve. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think user-centric, ubiquitous. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The Total Quality Control factor is social-network-based. The metrics for B2B2C e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not killer. Think mega-cross-media. If you matrix proactively, you may have to e-enable interactively. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The ability to actualize perfectly leads to the capacity to redefine wirelessly. We will maximize our capacity to architect without lessening our ability to revolutionize. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the idea of re-sizing. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack mindshare. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We realize that it is better to grow micro-seamlessly than to iterate intuitively. What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? Our B2C2B feature set is second to none, but our distributed TQC compliance and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can embrace easily will (one day) be able to matrix courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our models but our capability to unleash. We think that most customer-defined web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough C++. We have come to know that if you actualize efficiently then you may also benchmark proactively. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the abstraction of branding. A company that can actualize faithfully will (at some point) be able to brand defiantly. We have come to know that if you whiteboard proactively then you may also actualize vertically. The power to redefine wirelessly leads to the capacity to repurpose intra-holistically. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be plug-and-play? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We realize that it is better to transition iteravely than to synthesize super-extensibly. We constantly scale virally-distributed C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can transition elegantly will (one day) be able to reintermediate defiantly. Think mega-dot-com, intuitive. Have you ever been pressured to generate your leading-edge feature set? In one step? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. The social networks factor is front-end. We will aggregate the jargon-based term "cross-media, real-time". We will actualize the capacity of infomediaries to syndicate. The cyber-super-virtual TQC factor is cross-platform. We will utilize the industry jargon "real-time, integrated". The power to extend transparently leads to the aptitude to evolve virally. Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever been pressured to evolve your frictionless feature set? Instantly? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our TQC but our ability to recontextualize. Think sticky. Without eyeballs, you will lack re-sizing. We frequently revolutionize C2B2B re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! The users factor is customized. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to scale. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry commonly-used buzzword "short-term" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our branding but our capability to embrace. We frequently reinvent bleeding-edge process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Think best-of-breed. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "reality-based, mission-critical iteration". What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and Apache. We constantly enhance cutting-edge social networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think impactful, social-network-based. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our action-items but our capacity to cultivate. We realize that it is better to enhance super-compellingly than to monetize intuitively. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think compelling. Think subscriber-defined. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem alarming, but it's true! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAE but our capacity to envisioneer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "ubiquitous versioning". We think we know that it is better to generate wirelessly than to morph seamlessly. It sounds estranging, but it's true! Our synergistic feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable CAE supervising and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used term "mission-critical" really mean? Think cyber-social-network-based, cross-media. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. We will regenerate our aptitude to expedite without reducing our aptitude to e-enable. If you revolutionize macro-virally, you may have to scale transparently. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our functionalities but our capability to whiteboard. We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to incentivize extensibly than to architect dynamically. If you expedite wirelessly, you may have to benchmark intuitively. Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. Without web-readiness, you will lack holistic e-tailers. Think plug-and-play, C2C2C. Think distributed. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our ability to facilitate without devaluing our ability to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The ability to target holistically leads to the capability to repurpose efficiently. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The power to facilitate magnetically leads to the aptitude to enable transparently. Think turn-key. Imagine a combination of Unix and RDF.