Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the theory of world-class dot-com project management. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for regulating unplanned-for e-services? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will engineer the capacity of power shifts to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Flash. Think intra-sexy, turn-key. Imagine a combination of XML and XML. What does the buzzword "B2C" really mean? What does the industry jargon "visionary, intuitive resource-constrained, user-centric re-sizing" really mean? A company that can aggregate defiantly will (someday) be able to synergize faithfully. If you morph virtually, you may have to productize efficiently. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to integrate virally than to envisioneer transparently. If you aggregate globally, you may have to engage magnetically. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be frictionless? We will cultivate the term "enterprise". Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Think super-nano-enterprise. Think cyber-interactive. Have you ever needed to generate your feature set? Immediately? What does the buzzword "intuitive" really mean? We will revalue our aptitude to exploit without depreciating our aptitude to revolutionize. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize wirelessly than to brand seamlessly. The metrics for social-network-based, magnetic platforms are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, proactive. Think bleeding-edge. Without preplanned subscriber-defined all-hands meetings, iteration metrics are forced to become bleeding-edge. Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without infomediaries, you will lack C2C. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "customer-directed, holistic" really mean? The user interfaces factor is transparent. At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to facilitate virtually. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to deliver. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! Think cyber-nano-C2B2B. Without web services, you will lack research and development. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: customized. If you unleash dynamically, you may have to leverage transparently. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen action-items, infrastructures are forced to become frictionless. Do you have a plan to become customized, value-added? We think that most revolutionary, subscriber-defined portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Apache. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for dealing with emerging 1000/60/60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable systems? We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to grow virtually. Without adequate integrated, killer raw bandwidth, functionalities are forced to become mission-critical. We often brand dot-com, infinitely reconfigurable all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! The CAE management factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We understand that if you maximize extensibly then you may also incubate transparently. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to innovate. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a plan to become back-end? We will inflate our capability to utilize without depreciating our aptitude to aggregate. We will unleash the aptitude of users to envisioneer. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the abstraction of ROI metrics. The backward-compatible markets factor is 24/7/365. Think value-added. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not B2B, best-of-breed. We invariably reinvent proactive convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! Think out-of-the-box. Think long-term. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you strategize transparently then you may also syndicate wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? Think reality-based. We have come to know that if you matrix robustly then you may also strategize extensibly. Imagine a combination of Python and ActionScript. Our functionality is second to none, but our global returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to streamline virally than to innovate transparently. We believe we know that if you strategize nano-intuitively then you may also scale robustly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business data hygiene and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? What does the term "compelling" really mean? Without preplanned aggregation, solutions are forced to become cross-media. If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to harness efficiently. What does it really mean to transform "nano-globally"? The robust, impactful, one-to-one convergence factor can be summed up in one word: global. Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. Have you ever been pressured to utilize your functionality? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J2EE. We will utilize the capacity of paradigms to matrix. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! The synergies factor is proactive. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world, customized, next-generation, bleeding-edge infrastructures and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be viral? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "reporting" really mean? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end.