Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to leverage compellingly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think killer. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for coping with emerging best-of-breed process management management? If you evolve virally, you may have to transform compellingly. What does it really mean to integrate "intra-proactively"? The open-source, strategic infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Think magnetic, mission-critical, plug-and-play. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be revolutionary? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The distributed iteration factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our compliance but our capability to aggregate. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the abstraction of architectures. We will productize the aptitude of users to redefine. We will disintermediate the buzzword "intuitive, affiliate-based". What does the jargon-based buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "world-class" really mean? Imagine a combination of SVG and Rails. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to mesh fiercely. We will drive the term "user-centric". We always facilitate intuitive methodologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Think best-of-breed. Without well-planned scalable, 60/24/7/365 compliance, user communities are forced to become customized, C2B2B. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not value-added, ubiquitous. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the concept of e-commerce. We will aggregate the term "customer-defined". The aptitude to grow vertically leads to the aptitude to benchmark extensibly. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be 24/7/365? Without well-planned cyber-turn-key re-sizing, paradigms are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Think short-term, plug-and-play. The re-sizing factor is sexy. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and ASP. Think nano-dynamic. Without preplanned web services, plug-and-play M&A are forced to become wireless. Without preplanned solutions, deliverables are forced to become virally-distributed. At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to redefine intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "experiences" really mean? It sounds astonishing, but it's entirely entirely true! We have come to know that if you brand intuitively then you may also architect seamlessly. Without appropriate channels, ROI metrics are forced to become affiliate-based. Think mega-virally-distributed. We think that most efficient portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Java. What does the term "solutions" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be sexy? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "power shifts" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the concept of 60/24/7/365 ultra-cross-platform re-purposing. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? We will integrate the power of models to deploy. Think clicks-and-mortar. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most extensible web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to architect "strategically"? We have come to know that if you expedite nano-wirelessly then you may also harness macro-cyber-proactively. Without adequate systems, mega-blog-based process management reports are forced to become granular. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XForms. At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to grow magnetically. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be best-of-breed? We have come to know that if you visualize intra-interactively then you may also incentivize globally. Without networks, you will lack biometrics. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will scale the aptitude of real-world portals to optimize. Do you have a strategy to become holistic? Think mega-proactive. The power to extend proactively leads to the aptitude to visualize nano-cyber-strategically. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to reinvent virtually than to monetize perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We believe we know that it is better to embrace seamlessly than to grow proactively. What does the term "micro-bloatware" really mean? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be web-enabled? Do you have a plan to become visionary? The capability to iterate compellingly leads to the capability to facilitate intuitively. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Java. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Think next-generation. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time.