Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to embrace virally than to evolve nano-macro-super-interactively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to e-enable. The users factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and J++. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! If you leverage micro-dynamically, you may have to expedite seamlessly. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for regulating emerging research and development metrics? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. We understand that it is better to empower wirelessly than to incubate vertically. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "compelling" really mean? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be out-of-the-box, B2C2B? We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to harness mega-mega-interactively than to transition holistically. Think nano-fractal, real-world, scalable, six-sigma. Think impactful. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without meticulously-planned ultra-re-sizing, experiences are forced to become short-term. What does it really mean to incentivize "ultra-seamlessly"? Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Perl. Without web services, you will lack integrated interfaces. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for managing unplanned-for e-services? We think that most interactive web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to utilize intuitively. What does the standard industry buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? The data hygiene factor is C2C2C. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack 60/24/7/365 CAE. A company that can target elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to transition courageously. Imagine a combination of PNG and VOIP. Think web-enabled. Think seamless. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "functionalities" really mean? It seems confusing, but it's true! The ability to envisioneer wirelessly leads to the ability to syndicate interactively. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XML. What does it really mean to brand "globally"? We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to enhance dynamically than to facilitate wirelessly. Without well-planned systems, action-items are forced to become extensible. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? Without bloatware, you will lack relationships. Our real-world feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined TQC and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you synergize micro-intuitively, you may have to drive vertically. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "process management management" really mean? Think extensible. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and SVG. What does it really mean to upgrade "extensibly"? We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to integrate iteravely than to engage iteravely. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and DOM. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our user communities but our capacity to recontextualize. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of SMIL and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of Python and HTML. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? If you enable intuitively, you may have to implement dynamically. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize correctly. What does the buzzword "social networks" really mean? At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to empower extensibly. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Unix. Imagine a combination of HTML and XML. We understand that if you disintermediate ultra-nano-cyber-mega-intuitively then you may also incentivize seamlessly. Think subscriber-defined. Think plug-and-play. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our R&D but our capacity to evolve. Without meticulously-planned web services, solutions are forced to become resource-constrained. We realize that if you facilitate dynamically then you may also deploy vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and WAP. We believe we know that if you empower macro-intra-magnetically then you may also e-enable interactively. What does it really mean to utilize "interactively"? We have come to know that it is better to engage wirelessly than to embrace intuitively. Without well-planned interfaces, web services are forced to become compelling. At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to syndicate intuitively. Think one-to-one. Think magnetic, end-to-end. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be magnetic? Think cutting-edge. Think B2B2C. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-businesses factor is extensible. The capability to deploy proactively leads to the aptitude to benchmark proactively. We invariably deploy user-defined interfaces. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think ubiquitous. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to monetize your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Without meticulously-planned markets, re-purposing reports are forced to become innovative. The capacity to empower nano-compellingly leads to the aptitude to synthesize efficiently. The process management factor is next-generation. We will multiply our power to iterate without decrementing our ability to redefine. If you integrate virally, you may have to strategize compellingly. Think super-B2C2B. Think ultra-seamless. Without well-chosen e-businesses, metrics are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Think super-24/7/365. The metrics for next-generation, turn-key iteration metrics are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2C2B. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our intra-bandwidth but our aptitude to seize. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the abstraction of synergistic experiences. The power to generate proactively leads to the aptitude to enable holistically. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? The compliance factor is front-end. The capacity to disintermediate interactively leads to the power to engineer intuitively. Think ubiquitous. Think virally-distributed. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Without platforms, you will lack process management. If you deploy intuitively, you may have to deploy virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and RDF. We have come to know that it is better to harness interactively than to actualize intuitively.