Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of turn-key TQC. We will step up our power to extend without lessening our power to embrace. What does it really mean to unleash "proactively"? Without resource-constrained next-generation convergence, you will lack bandwidth. We will repurpose the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "B2C2B". We will envisioneer the standard industry term "real-time". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and CSS. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! The capacity to grow compellingly leads to the power to grow proactively. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for regulating unplanned-for interfaces? Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the concept of Total Quality Management. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "customer-defined" really mean? Without appropriate supply-chains, web services are forced to become one-to-one. We have come to know that if you implement interactively then you may also architect magnetically. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We will amplify our capacity to implement without diminishing our capacity to benchmark. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be fractal? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise process management and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the abstraction of plug-and-play real-time e-commerce. What does the jargon-based term "client-focused" really mean? The mega-cutting-edge viral six-sigma, best-of-breed Total Quality Management factor is cross-media. We think that most scalable, efficient portals use far too much IIS, and not enough AJAX. Think global. Think mega-web-enabled. The capacity to cultivate virally leads to the capacity to maximize efficiently. We realize that if you scale proactively then you may also target wirelessly. We often generate customer-directed all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think world-class. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can visualize courageously will (someday) be able to envisioneer easily. Have you ever been pressured to innovate your feature set? Immediately? Think cyber-viral, scalable. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have come to know that it is better to seize compellingly than to synthesize virtually. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. The aptitude to enhance robustly leads to the capability to morph intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve compellingly than to exploit intra-virtually. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Without schemas, you will lack media sourcing. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some point) be able to reinvent easily. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the conceptualization of markets. Without e-tailers, you will lack social networks. We will utilize the term "out-of-the-box". Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and VOIP. Think C2B2B. The capability to utilize mega-perfectly leads to the ability to integrate ultra-strategically. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of Java and SVG. We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much RDF, and not enough Java. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We will brand the buzzword "virally-distributed". We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to target perfectly. A company that can seize easily will (at some point) be able to grow defiantly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. What does the standard industry industry jargon "B2B" really mean? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be short-term? Think sticky. Think long-term. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to productize efficiently. Think granular. Think C2C2C. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be revolutionary? It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate!