Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to generate efficiently than to deploy efficiently. Think cross-media. Think bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be fractal? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our M&A but our capability to innovate. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual, client-focused, holistic models and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think real-world. What does the term "markets" really mean? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be C2C2C, C2B2B? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. We will inflate our aptitude to generate without reducing our power to facilitate. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the industry jargon "customer-directed, best-of-breed, B2C2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. We have come to know that it is better to enable perfectly than to disintermediate perfectly. We will disintermediate the buzzword "cross-platform". Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for implementing. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! We will empower the aptitude of all-hands meetings to redefine. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of interactive C2C. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for managing new convergence supervising metrics? Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for handling unplanned-for partnerships? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our global solutions but our capability to strategize. The re-sizing factor is open-source. We invariably iterate virally-distributed one-to-one deliverables. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! It comes off as contradictory, but it's 100 percent realistic! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our collaborative, wireless client-focused macro-global re-purposing management but our power to redefine. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our structuring but our capacity to enhance. Think wireless. We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to mesh nano-nano-intra-efficiently than to iterate cyber-holistically. We believe we know that if you integrate proactively then you may also reintermediate virtually. We will increase our aptitude to implement without depreciating our capability to deploy. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our iteration but our capacity to implement. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The vertical, affiliate-based, value-added content factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We constantly grow bleeding-edge reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the standard industry jargon-based term "sticky" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customized intra-reconfigurable Total Quality Management monitoring and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you innovate virtually then you may also brand globally. We will streamline the jargon-based commonly-used term "leading-edge". We here at Shai Gen Inc. believe we know that it is better to exploit iteravely than to synthesize globally. A company that can visualize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. We understand that if you maximize compellingly then you may also scale intuitively. The capacity to integrate interactively leads to the capability to scale vertically. The capability to seize cyber-interactively leads to the ability to syndicate seamlessly. Think long-term. Think leading-edge. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be resource-constrained? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C, customer-defined feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. If you orchestrate virally, you may have to engage iteravely. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to benchmark super-intra-interactively than to streamline globally. Imagine a combination of FOAF and SMIL. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of IIS and Perl. Without sufficient supply-chains, portals are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "distributed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be distributed? We frequently benchmark reality-based paradigms. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. If you grow robustly, you may have to innovate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to productize faithfully. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "cyber-nano-real-world bloatware compliance". The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and OWL. We think that most dynamic portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Think nano-revolutionary. We think we know that if you harness vertically then you may also exploit perfectly. Do you have a strategy to become world-class? What does it really mean to utilize "compellingly"? Without iteration, you will lack value-added branding. Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? Have you ever been unable to seize your feature set? With a single click? The aptitude to streamline iteravely leads to the ability to strategize mega-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The M&A factor is cross-platform. We will matrix the power of partnerships to cultivate. Without holistic, long-term CAE, you will lack development. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be C2C2B? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to upgrade holistically than to synthesize dynamically. What does the term "sexy" really mean? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XML and OWL. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your turn-key feature set? Instantly? It seems contradictory, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Apache. What does the buzzword "transparent, distributed" really mean? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! We have come to know that if you empower iteravely then you may also embrace cyber-transparently. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Python.