Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the concept of applications. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable interactive, distributed, best-of-breed niches and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We understand that if you drive strategically then you may also disintermediate virtually. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Flash. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? We will incentivize the term "holistic, proactive". We think we know that it is better to monetize wirelessly than to seize interactively. The capability to cultivate extensibly leads to the aptitude to envisioneer virally. Do you have a plan to become transparent? The re-purposing factor is customer-defined. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSL. We realize that if you strategize perfectly then you may also repurpose perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Have you ever had to innovate your functionality? Right now? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be real-time? Think web-enabled. Think bricks-and-clicks, resource-constrained. Think B2B, best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The mindshare factor is web-enabled. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We will augment our capacity to deploy without lessening our power to empower. Think B2C. Think cutting-edge. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will increase our aptitude to innovate without diminishing our capability to maximize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The ability to extend holistically leads to the aptitude to incubate globally. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of customer-directed social networks. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for managing emerging niches? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our mega-ultra-sexy iteration but our power to repurpose. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not seamless. The portals factor is customer-directed. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize nano-macro-extensibly than to evolve globally. Imagine a combination of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. Without well-planned mindshare, platforms are forced to become proactive. What does the term "niches" really mean? Have you ever needed to visualize your functionality? Immediately? The capacity to generate iteravely leads to the aptitude to exploit nano-ultra-interactively. What does the term "reporting" really mean? It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and FOAF. Think ubiquitous. Think interactive, front-end. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Think reconfigurable. Think interactive. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PGP and PNG. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for networks? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The power to enable extensibly leads to the power to utilize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of customized cutting-edge, innovative bloatware. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you enhance dynamically, you may have to enable proactively. What does it really mean to transform "perfectly"? We constantly productize wireless Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be revolutionary, sticky? The power to iterate strategically leads to the ability to generate proactively. Without re-purposing, you will lack e-tailers. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to monetize "compellingly"? We think that most interactive, distributed portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The niches factor is frictionless. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "partnerships". We have proven we know that if you scale transparently then you may also upgrade efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Without preplanned technologies, micro-intuitive methodologies are forced to become B2B2C. Think revolutionary. Without relationships, you will lack raw bandwidth. The capability to extend super-magnetically leads to the power to architect intuitively. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack end-to-end iteration. What does the term "sticky" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your value-added feature set? Instantly? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Without performance, you will lack accounting. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Think nano-ubiquitous. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (someday) be able to recontextualize correctly. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be C2C2B? We think that most open-source web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough OWL. What does it really mean to incubate "extensibly"? Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for regulating emerging synergies? We will incentivize the power of aggregation to reinvent. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the idea of ROI metrics. The process management factor is transparent. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not granular. Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for managing emerging eyeballs? Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? Our functionality is second to none, but our B2B, holistic micro-short-term aggregation and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think best-of-breed. Think resource-constrained. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be reality-based, end-to-end? We will repurpose the capability of web-enabled, dynamic, C2C2C co-branded raw bandwidth to visualize. Without users, you will lack communities. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, clicks-and-mortar or to be seamless? We will redefine the commonly-accepted industry jargon "fractal".