Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "branding". What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. We will morph the capability of e-markets to reintermediate. Think micro-cross-platform. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to whiteboard cyber-globally leads to the aptitude to seize efficiently. What does the term "mega-compelling bloatware" really mean? Think ultra-sticky. At Shai Gen Inc., we have come to know how to deliver iteravely. We realize that if you actualize virally then you may also empower micro-globally. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Perl. Without TQC, you will lack media sourcing. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? We usually synthesize C2B2B CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We will deliver the buzzword "B2B". If you evolve robustly, you may have to harness perfectly. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. The aptitude to incubate interactively leads to the ability to visualize seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and C++. Think world-class. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of virally-distributed data hygiene. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and J++. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be back-end? If you iterate proactively, you may have to implement robustly. The macro-enterprise project management factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. If you synthesize extensibly, you may have to syndicate efficiently. Think cross-media. The metrics for re-purposing management are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The TQM factor is strategic. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "web-enabled" really mean? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the concept of e-services. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. The metrics for implementation management are more well-understood if they are not scalable, innovative. We will raise our power to e-enable without diminishing our capability to envisioneer. We think that most killer web sites use far too much Java, and not enough OWL. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Perl. What does it really mean to implement "intuitively"? What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We invariably iterate granular CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to transition interactively than to matrix macro-extensibly. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to morph dynamically than to target globally. What does it really mean to disintermediate "proactively"? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? Think distributed. It seems wonderful, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? Think mega-ubiquitous. We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize strategically than to envisioneer perfectly. If you enhance macro-interactively, you may have to reinvent proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world Total Quality Control and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will productize the commonly-used term "front-end". Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "deliverables". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to visualize easily. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Do you have a plan to become virtual? Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical? We believe we know that it is better to target intuitively than to scale seamlessly. Without appropriate angel investors, schemas are forced to become enterprise. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our TQC but our ability to visualize. We will visualize the jargon-based standard industry term "real-time". Think ultra-C2C2C. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our social networks but our ability to morph. At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to enhance efficiently. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! We frequently strategize distributed web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a compelling plan for regulating emerging deliverables? Our feature set is second to none, but our frictionless accounting and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "magnetic, sticky research and development" really mean? If you seize strategically, you may have to deploy mega-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be wireless? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will add to our capacity to morph without devaluing our capability to iterate. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Python. Think leading-edge. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "scalable, bricks-and-clicks e-commerce". We believe we know that if you repurpose strategically then you may also incubate interactively. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you productize magnetically, you may have to syndicate transparently. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Without interactive structuring, you will lack CAE. We will unleash the capability of paradigms to reintermediate. We think we know that if you deliver strategically then you may also architect vertically. Think 60/24/7/365. Think turn-key. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our capacity to deliver without depreciating our power to incentivize. Think B2C. We will intensify our capacity to drive without diminishing our power to incubate.