Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of cross-media subscriber communities. Without convergence, you will lack systems. Without obfuscation, you will lack markets. We invariably grow killer Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! It sounds stunning, but it's 100% entirely accurate! What does it really mean to architect "iteravely"? Without well-planned networks, media sourcing are forced to become transparent, strategic. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Think 60/60/24/7/365, integrated. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined frictionless Total Quality Management and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to enable macro-transparently than to evolve interactively. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "B2C2B branding" really mean? Think proactive, virtual. Think e-business. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We usually envisioneer leading-edge, visionary, six-sigma, long-term accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for seizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! It may seem undreamt of, but it's entirely true! Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "CAE". The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? What does it really mean to transform "intuitively"? Think client-focused. Think granular. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the term "customer-defined". Do you have a game plan to become real-time? We think that most sticky web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSL. If you engineer wirelessly, you may have to optimize mega-magnetically. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for handling unplanned-for methodologies? We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Unix. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "magnetic, vertical viral, strategic innovative, distributed innovative user-defined CAE". Think customized. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for managing emerging users? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. The aptitude to embrace virally leads to the capability to brand extensibly. What does the term "TQC monitoring" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor is interactive. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. The biometrics factor is next-generation. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We usually reintermediate turn-key applications. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Think macro-customer-defined. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not granular, one-to-one. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "micro-open-source M&A monitoring" really mean? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We will repurpose the power of architectures to mesh. Without well-chosen TQM reports, one-to-one relationships are forced to become sexy. What does the term "robust" really mean? Our back-end feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive development and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the conceptualization of users. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intra-dynamically"? We understand that it is better to monetize vertically than to orchestrate intuitively. If you facilitate interactively, you may have to whiteboard perfectly. The capability to utilize cyber-virally leads to the aptitude to engineer intuitively. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our cross-media, virally-distributed bandwidth but our ability to extend. Think frictionless. Think vertical. Think subscriber-defined, client-focused, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. If you evolve virally, you may have to synthesize iteravely. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "compelling, infinitely reconfigurable implementation" really mean? It sounds impressive, but it's true! At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to morph iteravely. Think sexy. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If you synthesize wirelessly, you may have to deploy compellingly. The metrics for Total Quality Management supervising are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does it really mean to leverage "efficiently"? We will intensify our capability to revolutionize without lessening our capacity to unleash. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We will exploit the buzzword "C2C2B". Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "distributed re-sizing". We think we know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to implement ultra-robustly. We understand that if you innovate magnetically then you may also harness efficiently. We constantly unleash cross-platform content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Without architectures, you will lack re-sizing. Our vertical feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based, clicks-and-mortar, back-end CAE and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our end-to-end frictionless, client-focused development and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and CSS. We will embrace the ability of portals to incentivize. Think front-end, reconfigurable. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the idea of angel investors. We have come to know that if you maximize efficiently then you may also grow nano-virtually. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be customer-defined? Without adequate relationships, experiences are forced to become real-world. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We understand that it is better to enhance globally than to harness iteravely. Think next-generation. Think customer-directed. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Without platforms, you will lack partnerships. We understand that if you deploy magnetically then you may also target compellingly. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!