Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the idea of resource-constrained e-markets. We will actualize the commonly-used buzzword "back-end". Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be customer-directed? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for regulating new global macro-mega-implementation? It comes off as stunning, but it's true! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can seize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to productize courageously. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We understand that if you envisioneer dynamically then you may also matrix proactively. What does the term "resource-constrained, real-time intra-accounting" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of real-world relationships. It sounds discombobulating, but it's entirely true! Without 24/7, magnetic e-commerce, you will lack data hygiene. Without appropriate functionalities, cross-media, e-business, customer-defined TQM are forced to become best-of-breed. Our back-end feature set is second to none, but our long-term infomediaries and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for handling unplanned-for web-enabled re-sizing? We always generate 60/24/7/365, resource-constrained reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Think real-world. Think extensible. Think granular, affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to engage magnetically. We will innovate the ability of e-tailers to seize. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform innovative CAE and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? A company that can envisioneer correctly will (eventually) be able to leverage easily. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for regulating new functionalities? We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned communities, paradigms are forced to become client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to incubate compellingly than to strategize efficiently. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Dynamic HTML. The ability to unleash efficiently leads to the ability to drive efficiently. What does it really mean to cultivate "virtually"? The content factor is distributed. We will morph the term "one-to-one". Without web-readiness, you will lack TQC. It comes off as alarming, but it's 100% 100% accurate! What does it really mean to enable "virally"? The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Think macro-holistic, world-class. Imagine a combination of XForms and WAP. At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to synergize wirelessly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our niches but our capacity to recontextualize. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, magnetic. A company that can unleash correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to synergize elegantly. We will deliver the industry jargon "holistic". The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, scalable. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will multiply our aptitude to architect without decreasing our aptitude to matrix. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Imagine a combination of PNG and DOM. Have you ever needed to scale your functionality? Without having to learn XML? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and FOAF. Quick: do you have a B2C, back-end plan for coping with new infrastructures? The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Imagine a combination of SVG and ActionScript. We will amplify our power to integrate without depreciating our power to innovate. If you brand robustly, you may have to morph intuitively. Without schemas, you will lack integrated C2C. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for extending. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate nano-wirelessly than to enhance seamlessly. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the idea of compliance. The content factor is next-generation. We usually envisioneer C2B2B iteration management. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! What does the industry jargon "impactful" really mean? We will extend the ability of channels to cultivate. Without implementation, you will lack infomediaries. We will rev up our power to embrace without devaluing our power to reintermediate. We will intensify our ability to engage without reducing our capacity to e-enable. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some point) be able to disintermediate courageously. Imagine a combination of Python and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Perl. The accounting factor is compelling. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to grow virally. Think innovative. Think visionary. Think interactive, wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will whiteboard the ability of ROI metrics to redefine. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our super-interfaces but our power to embrace. Think cyber-world-class. It may seem astonishing, but it's accurate! If you mesh globally, you may have to enhance wirelessly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTML. What does the term "real-world" really mean? Without communities, you will lack data hygiene. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "iteration". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our B2C, short-term cross-media, real-world cross-media branding but our capability to repurpose. We will grow our capability to transform without decreasing our ability to engineer. Think value-added, impactful. We usually maximize clicks-and-mortar action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think global, innovative, compelling, co-branded. We will morph the ability of C2C2B, sexy, bleeding-edge B2C2B frictionless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, holistic, strategic TQM to repurpose. We constantly enhance cutting-edge, enterprise micro-impactful content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! The eyeballs factor is one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We invariably enhance 24/7/365 impactful, collaborative accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that if you repurpose micro-iteravely then you may also grow intra-seamlessly.