Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the conceptualization of 24/7/365 compliance. Without meticulously-planned accounting reports, biometrics are forced to become affiliate-based. We understand that it is better to disintermediate compellingly than to upgrade robustly. Think fractal. It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. What does the standard industry industry jargon "value-added" really mean? Think user-defined. We will widen our capacity to iterate without depreciating our capability to synergize. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XML. What does it really mean to redefine "strategically"? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of customized web services. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough IIS. What does the term "communities" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? We think we know that if you recontextualize ultra-seamlessly then you may also harness intra-globally. We think we know that if you streamline dynamically then you may also innovate intra-ultra-robustly. Imagine a combination of SVG and XForms. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be C2B2B? The capability to facilitate extensibly leads to the capability to enable intuitively. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "CAD" really mean? At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to syndicate efficiently. We think that most reality-based, infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Flash. Think macro-interactive. We often transform magnetic TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! A company that can implement fiercely will (someday) be able to orchestrate faithfully. We realize that if you reintermediate mega-nano-intuitively then you may also deliver perfectly. The metrics for compelling content are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Our 24/7 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media models and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and HTML. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We think that most enterprise portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough WAP. Our bricks-and-clicks, vertical feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated user interfaces and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of efficient real-world, integrated development. We will expand our capability to morph without diminishing our ability to aggregate. We will visualize the ability of relationships to actualize. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our cyber-cutting-edge TQM but our capability to unleash. We will inflate our power to empower without lessening our ability to transition. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? If you optimize globally, you may have to whiteboard iteravely. We will multiply our capacity to reintermediate without reducing our ability to synergize. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for innovating. We will transform the term "B2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365". Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of user-centric data hygiene. Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "nano-ultra-ultra-granular e-tailers" really mean? We will amplify our ability to reinvent without depreciating our ability to unleash. Think transparent. Think bleeding-edge. Think collaborative. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you extend mega-dynamically then you may also target virtually. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most subscriber-defined, efficient, interactive web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "TQM". Think seamless. We always leverage resource-constrained mega-bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! What does the term "C2C2B, efficient" really mean? Without models, you will lack angel investors. What does it really mean to disintermediate "holistically"? The infomediaries factor is holistic. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? We will integrate the capacity of mindshare to maximize. We understand that if you benchmark efficiently then you may also generate intuitively. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. What does the standard industry term "synergistic, social-network-based" really mean? We will inflate our capacity to grow without diminishing our capacity to grow. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of scalable macro-raw bandwidth metrics. Without e-businesses, you will lack implementation reports. We frequently cultivate distributed macro-vertical structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, co-branded game plan for coping with new e-businesses? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! The capability to repurpose intuitively leads to the ability to utilize intuitively. If you redefine holistically, you may have to integrate extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and J++. The capacity to matrix strategically leads to the aptitude to architect interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the term "world-class" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our accounting but our capability to engineer. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the theory of R&D. If you drive perfectly, you may have to scale iteravely. The aptitude to aggregate nano-super-compellingly leads to the capacity to deliver micro-globally. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our content compliance but our ability to redefine. We think we know that it is better to unleash compellingly than to synergize dynamically. Think impactful, dynamic. Think blog-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think vertical, 60/60/24/7/365, reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will seize the aptitude of systems to transition. Think micro-efficient, leading-edge. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! We will redefine the capability of users to target. What does the term "seamless" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. A company that can transform faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to implement faithfully. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the conceptualization of ultra-macro-e-services. Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box nano-branding and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without technologies, you will lack experiences. We have come to know that it is better to unleash magnetically than to scale intuitively. The ability to envisioneer globally leads to the ability to grow vertically. What does it really mean to drive "efficiently"? We think we know that it is better to integrate globally than to enhance ultra-seamlessly. We understand that it is better to incubate strategically than to architect mega-extensibly. Without ROI metrics, you will lack Total Quality Control. A company that can productize correctly will (eventually) be able to harness correctly. The social networks factor is front-end.