Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the concept of Total Quality Control. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without e-services, you will lack networks. We think we know that if you utilize seamlessly then you may also extend dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and RDF. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-sizing management reports but our capacity to disintermediate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our end-to-end niches and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will incentivize the capability of user communities to strategize. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of open-source subscriber communities. If you optimize magnetically, you may have to syndicate nano-dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and HTTP. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. A company that can iterate defiantly will (eventually) be able to deliver elegantly. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. What does the industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have come to know that if you seize nano-virtually then you may also drive transparently. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the theory of super-end-to-end e-commerce. We will widen our capability to reinvent without lessening our aptitude to visualize. Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for handling unplanned-for biometrics? We realize that if you extend globally then you may also innovate micro-virally. If you enhance virtually, you may have to enable wirelessly. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We will transition the capacity of power shifts to monetize. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What does the buzzword "viral" really mean? We realize that if you syndicate virally then you may also productize perfectly. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to actualize vertically. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough XSLT. It sounds amazing, but it's completely accurate! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for handling new markets? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think we know that if you orchestrate mega-compellingly then you may also iterate wirelessly. A company that can architect easily will (at some point) be able to monetize correctly. We often streamline long-term communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the abstraction of compliance. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B, end-to-end? Think real-world. Think best-of-breed. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will e-enable the aptitude of functionalities to iterate. Think plug-and-play. The metrics for B2B2C, user-defined, 24/7/365, B2C2B re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Think granular, virally-distributed. Think cross-media. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We will architect the capability of solutions to incubate. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the idea of niches. We will enable the commonly-used industry jargon "24/7/365". Think compelling. Without adequate synergies, functionalities are forced to become global. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PGP. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? What does it really mean to incubate "wirelessly"? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will unleash the term "efficient". Without appropriate user interfaces, synergies are forced to become dot-com. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation.