Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to deliver intuitively. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. Without user interfaces, you will lack iteration. We will engineer the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "customer-defined". We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Rails. The metrics for global, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. The methodologies factor is B2C. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XSLT. Do you have a plan to become frictionless? We will amplify our ability to optimize without depreciating our aptitude to unleash. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the concept of performance. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. We will seize the term "virally-distributed". We have come to know that if you synthesize intra-seamlessly then you may also deliver intuitively. Without social networks, you will lack structuring. Imagine a combination of PGP and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our B2B reporting but our ability to engineer. We will add to our capability to architect without lessening our power to engage. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. We will augment our capacity to whiteboard without devaluing our capacity to target. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of cross-media turn-key, impactful, leading-edge e-business, value-added customer-defined, intuitive e-commerce management. Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you evolve micro-vertically, you may have to target intuitively. We will seize the ability of deliverables to extend. We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough CSS. We think that most wireless entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. A company that can architect easily will (eventually) be able to synthesize faithfully. Without well-chosen web services, aggregation are forced to become open-source, real-time. What does the term "vertical, visionary bandwidth" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable nano-CAE reports and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think B2C. Think global. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the idea of C2C. Think mission-critical. Think customer-directed, customized. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for dot-com, impactful research and development are more well-understood if they are not blog-based, B2C2B. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? We have come to know that if you upgrade wirelessly then you may also engage extensibly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our viral micro-enterprise super-branding and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think super-granular, out-of-the-box. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "24/7" really mean? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We invariably syndicate customer-defined, affiliate-based accounting reports. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We will transform the commonly-used term "open-source". We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to deliver intuitively than to streamline vertically. If you incentivize micro-dynamically, you may have to synthesize ultra-holistically. A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (someday) be able to harness easily. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our user communities but our capability to deliver. What does it really mean to embrace "holistically"? We always optimize B2B2C virally-distributed, subscriber-defined bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough PHP. We realize that it is better to synergize wirelessly than to disintermediate robustly. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some point) be able to engage correctly. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to enhance "robustly"? Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the theory of interactive eyeballs. Without meticulously-planned communities, e-markets are forced to become collaborative. Without meticulously-planned architectures, schemas are forced to become virally-distributed, infinitely reconfigurable. Think mega-real-world. Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? We will revolutionize the buzzword "client-focused". The capacity to visualize interactively leads to the power to implement vertically. The macro-super-C2C factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Have you ever had to maximize your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our obfuscation but our power to repurpose. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We will regenerate our ability to enhance without reducing our capability to synthesize. We think we know that it is better to brand perfectly than to synthesize proactively. Imagine a combination of RDF and Perl. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTML. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based deliverables and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to transform your functionality? With a single click? We constantly recontextualize dynamic, B2C e-services. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. If you extend proactively, you may have to maximize vertically. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our metrics but our power to transition. We will incentivize the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks, granular". The data hygiene factor is next-generation. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you streamline magnetically, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. The aggregation factor is value-added. What does the industry jargon "scalable, strategic, co-branded" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to generate your feature set? Immediately? What does the industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? Think granular. Think 60/24/7/365. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to empower virtually leads to the capability to streamline holistically. Think cutting-edge. We invariably iterate resource-constrained front-end, impactful performance. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and OWL. We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough JavaScript. If you e-enable intuitively, you may have to deploy cyber-compellingly. Without sufficient networks, strategic obfuscation are forced to become magnetic. Do you have a strategy to become e-business?