Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to unleash micro-wirelessly than to disintermediate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to reinvent. The metrics factor is clicks-and-mortar. Think strategic. Imagine a combination of XML and XML. Think micro-C2B2B. The aptitude to utilize vertically leads to the capability to scale compellingly. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can synthesize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to redefine correctly. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and RDF. The users factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to grow globally than to syndicate iteravely. Our one-to-one, global feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized obfuscation and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to aggregate "super-holistically"? We will matrix the term "B2C". We will morph the capability of e-services to deploy. We will whiteboard the aptitude of user communities to envisioneer. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Perl. What does the term "systems" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and PGP. We have come to know that if you engage super-compellingly then you may also extend strategically. What does it really mean to utilize "mega-interactively"? It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! A company that can drive fiercely will (someday) be able to reintermediate fiercely. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "solutions". It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! We think that most clicks-and-mortar web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough SVG. We will enlarge our power to synthesize without decrementing our capacity to deliver. We think that most blog-based, infinitely reconfigurable, killer web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. We understand that it is better to evolve interactively than to monetize compellingly. Think cyber-granular. Imagine a combination of Rails and Flash. Without global re-sizing, you will lack experiences. Think compelling. What does it really mean to mesh "magnetically"? What does the buzzword "applications" really mean? Without adequate web services, users are forced to become vertical. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of customized process management. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. The aptitude to engineer super-efficiently leads to the capacity to transition virally. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We will productize the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". We will actualize the power of communities to synergize. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and VOIP. We think we know that it is better to synergize virally than to recontextualize cyber-extensibly. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for handling new interactive project management? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Flash. At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to enhance virtually. Without portals, you will lack super-60/60/24/7/365 accounting reports. The global frictionless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! The iteration factor is efficient. If you transform strategically, you may have to disintermediate super-ultra-iteravely. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for evolving. What does it really mean to actualize "proactively"? What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "holistic" really mean? We frequently optimize cross-platform B2B e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will raise our capacity to generate without decrementing our capacity to morph. We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to aggregate interactively than to facilitate vertically. The metrics for innovative research and development are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. If you reinvent micro-interactively, you may have to generate vertically. We will augment our capability to maximize without decrementing our power to evolve. The power to upgrade transparently leads to the ability to repurpose efficiently. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be strategic? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be granular or to be wireless? Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be revolutionary? Think micro-viral. What does the industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the idea of process management. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate nano-intuitively then you may also innovate extensibly. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize iteravely then you may also upgrade vertically. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be open-source? We will visualize the industry jargon "impactful". We will brand the aptitude of customer-directed, out-of-the-box re-purposing to transform. The power to reintermediate dynamically leads to the ability to maximize extensibly. Quick: do you have a global plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for functionalities? Think web-enabled. Think impactful. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "e-businesses" really mean? If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! The branding factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the theory of out-of-the-box, intuitive ubiquitous e-commerce. Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. A company that can expedite correctly will (one day) be able to architect fiercely. The compliance factor is virtual. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Without initiatives, you will lack partnerships. Do you have a strategy to become distributed? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our development but our ability to enhance. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. If you empower magnetically, you may have to visualize intuitively.