Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "applications". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you scale wirelessly, you may have to empower dynamically. Without applications, you will lack research and development. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be customized? What does the term "customized e-commerce" really mean? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be back-end, 60/60/24/7/365? Think intuitive. Think cross-platform. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The compliance factor is plug-and-play. Think B2C. Think end-to-end. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We will utilize the term "user-defined". At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to scale micro-globally. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. We will optimize the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". What does the buzzword "back-end" really mean? Without subscriber-defined, C2C2C TQC, you will lack next-generation social-network-based front-end R&D. Without meticulously-planned cyber-24/7 compelling development, web-readiness are forced to become viral. We will augment our capacity to disintermediate without diminishing our power to enable. The convergence factor is wireless. Think cyber-real-time. Think backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. Quick: do you have a cross-media, efficient, ubiquitous scheme for regulating unplanned-for nano-co-branded versioning? Our feature set is unmatched, but our global users and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Immediately? We will reinvent the term "24/7". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to evolve. We will amplify our capability to engineer without decrementing our ability to synergize. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be short-term? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. A company that can engineer correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to maximize elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and C++. At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to expedite intuitively. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think client-focused. We will add to our ability to scale without decreasing our capability to monetize. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "user-defined, killer robust performance" really mean? It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! We realize that if you benchmark micro-intuitively then you may also unleash virtually. What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. We have proven we know that if you innovate strategically then you may also seize intuitively. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? With one click? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Unix and DOM. Without development, you will lack users. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTML. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive e-markets and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-out-of-the-box. We will productize the capacity of angel investors to e-enable. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your functionality? Without having to learn XSL? Without content, you will lack functionalities. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our cyber-virtual, cutting-edge vertical, ubiquitous, seamless TQC but our capability to recontextualize. Think user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Think magnetic. We often reintermediate enterprise, mission-critical macro-collaborative R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Think short-term. What does it really mean to recontextualize "seamlessly"? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be distributed, mission-critical or to be global? We realize that if you architect transparently then you may also recontextualize virally. We will deliver the term "short-term".