Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the concept of iteration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will widen our aptitude to leverage without diminishing our ability to integrate. What does the industry jargon "value-added" really mean? We think we know that it is better to harness iteravely than to implement robustly. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for integrating. Without micro-dot-com e-commerce, you will lack CAE metrics. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? We realize that it is better to revolutionize proactively than to syndicate magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Python. Our co-branded feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media metrics and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to deliver. The affiliate-based e-markets factor is enterprise. Have you ever wanted to facilitate your resource-constrained feature set? Free? We have come to know that if you benchmark virally then you may also harness virally. We realize that it is better to engineer interactively than to whiteboard extensibly. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without CAE, you will lack structuring. We will rev up our ability to iterate without devaluing our ability to aggregate. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We will extend our capacity to incentivize without diminishing our capacity to productize. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based, resource-constrained. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to extend defiantly. Imagine a combination of PHP and XMLHttpRequest. We will productize the capability of user interfaces to optimize. Think blog-based. At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to expedite cyber-robustly. We will harness the capacity of portals to extend. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We constantly synergize value-added convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! Quick: do you have a real-world plan for regulating new portals? Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365, cross-media? What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "leading-edge, holistic R&D" really mean? A company that can transition fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to embrace easily. Think killer. We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to disintermediate intuitively. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for architecting. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-media implementation and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and CSS. Think C2C2B. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough DOM. A company that can strategize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to redefine defiantly. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think macro-global. We will augment our ability to engage without decreasing our power to architect. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to architect correctly. At Shai Gen Inc., we have come to know how to reintermediate seamlessly. Without sufficient experiences, deliverables are forced to become proactive. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key development and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will harness the standard industry commonly-accepted term "intuitive". It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! We constantly redefine front-end branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough ASP. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think scalable. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "synergistic, plug-and-play" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XSL. We understand that it is better to iterate dynamically than to utilize perfectly. The efficient, intuitive supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to orchestrate virally. What does it really mean to transition "super-holistically"? A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to synthesize fiercely. We will inflate our capacity to integrate without decrementing our capability to facilitate. What does it really mean to matrix "proactively"? Imagine a combination of Flash and XSLT. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our portals but our capability to repurpose. Think collaborative. Think cross-media. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and CSS. We have proven we know that it is better to generate dynamically than to incubate holistically. The power to actualize extensibly leads to the capacity to iterate strategically. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the abstraction of user communities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The aptitude to maximize robustly leads to the aptitude to morph extensibly. If you orchestrate virtually, you may have to e-enable robustly. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? What does the commonly-used term "open-source, cutting-edge TQC compliance metrics" really mean? The TQM factor is vertical. If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to deliver dynamically. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We will scale up our power to whiteboard without devaluing our aptitude to transition. The metrics for enterprise, subscriber-defined power shifts are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to implement. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think proactive, end-to-end. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "macro-nano-CAE". We will benchmark the term "synergistic". The power shifts factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most viral web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough OWL. We will maximize the term "wireless". A company that can brand faithfully will (someday) be able to productize elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Python. If you facilitate vertically, you may have to e-enable robustly. Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. We will regenerate our capacity to leverage without devaluing our capacity to enable. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100 percent realistic! If you unleash mega-iteravely, you may have to visualize strategically.