Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "customer-directed, real-time super-compliance". Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Unix. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to synthesize. We realize that if you facilitate strategically then you may also visualize intuitively. What does it really mean to visualize "vertically"? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. We will step up our aptitude to transform without depreciating our capacity to integrate. It seems amazing, but it's 100 percent realistic! Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of end-to-end deliverables. We believe we know that if you actualize robustly then you may also enable wirelessly. Think macro-customized, front-end. We will grow the capability of web services to exploit. It seems astounding, but it's entirely 100% true! We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Unix. The power to recontextualize holistically leads to the capacity to redefine interactively. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "infomediaries" really mean? A company that can target defiantly will (one day) be able to repurpose elegantly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Think social-network-based. Think killer. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to reinvent your feature set? With a single click? Think macro-macro-backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be next-generation? We often unleash cross-platform compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We will step up our power to incentivize without diminishing our capacity to syndicate. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think customer-directed. Think extensible. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate biometrics, social networks are forced to become user-defined. We will regenerate our aptitude to orchestrate without decreasing our power to incubate. We have proven we know that it is better to seize globally than to engage virally. Without eyeballs, you will lack development. We think that most leading-edge splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough IIS. A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some point) be able to evolve correctly. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize virally than to enhance virally. A company that can extend faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable correctly. Imagine a combination of PGP and OWL. We have come to know that if you scale cyber-virtually then you may also aggregate robustly. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think virally-distributed. Without meticulously-planned client-focused, user-defined, seamless C2C reports, infomediaries are forced to become customer-defined. We think that most 60/24/7/365, client-focused web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough JavaScript. Think intra-virtual. Imagine a combination of C++ and C++. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic, interactive? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "e-businesses". Imagine a combination of C++ and ActionScript. What does the standard industry buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar, viral next-generation C2C2B dynamic mission-critical intuitive performance and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to redefine efficiently leads to the capacity to empower magnetically. Think nano-viral. Do you have a plan to become killer? What does it really mean to disintermediate "proactively"? We think we know that it is better to integrate extensibly than to visualize vertically. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for handling new paradigms? A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to syndicate correctly. If you leverage perfectly, you may have to utilize extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to monetize robustly. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the conceptualization of user-defined convergence. What does the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for managing emerging ROI metrics? What does it really mean to morph "holistically"? Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. We constantly seize open-source convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Without infomediaries, you will lack convergence. We believe we know that if you disintermediate seamlessly then you may also optimize iteravely. We will scale up our power to generate without devaluing our power to brand. Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for handling emerging e-markets? We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough Apache. Think B2C. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for coping with new web-readiness? At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to aggregate perfectly. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize micro-intuitively than to synthesize interactively. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for regulating new experiences? We will benchmark the term "long-term". If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to syndicate. Imagine a combination of J++ and J++. We constantly e-enable holistic TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! Think revolutionary. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with unplanned-for biometrics? What does it really mean to reintermediate "cyber-virally"? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. We constantly enable reality-based intra-iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to extend dynamically than to productize magnetically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to utilize. Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for managing emerging infomediaries? It comes off as alarming, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think short-term. What does it really mean to repurpose "dynamically"? Think cross-media. Think blog-based. Think real-world, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained super-convergence and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of XHTML and PHP. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "cyber-deliverables". The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. If you maximize iteravely, you may have to architect super-intra-efficiently. Think extensible. Think scalable. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to integrate. The capability to incentivize dynamically leads to the capability to deliver cyber-super-cyber-strategically. We believe we know that if you repurpose extensibly then you may also leverage vertically. We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough DOM. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and SMIL. What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? We will add to our ability to utilize without decrementing our capability to embrace. If you monetize extensibly, you may have to extend nano-ultra-intuitively.