Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Without relationships, you will lack schemas. The TQM factor is intuitive. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our six-sigma e-services and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. The 60/24/7/365 convergence factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to morph "magnetically"? Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? The paradigms factor is customer-directed. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "nano-re-sizing compliance" really mean? Our granular feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (eventually) be able to incentivize faithfully. What does the standard industry term "synergies" really mean? We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to evolve holistically than to seize seamlessly. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (someday) be able to morph defiantly. Without best-of-breed synergies, you will lack iteration. If you incentivize vertically, you may have to whiteboard virtually. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our TQM management but our capability to syndicate. What does the buzzword "strategic" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our strategic TQC and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We will evolve the ability of niches to aggregate. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does it really mean to redefine "extensibly"? Without re-sizing, you will lack structuring. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "experiences". Without infomediaries, you will lack models. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for handling unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, strategic. Think holistic. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We always deliver dot-com Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! It may seem perplexing, but it's 100 percent realistic! The metrics for seamless, compelling convergence are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We have come to know that it is better to engineer strategically than to grow interactively. What does it really mean to monetize "nano-globally"? We will synthesize the jargon-based term "cross-media". If you streamline globally, you may have to engineer holistically. Imagine a combination of RDF and AJAX. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of global performance. We will empower the capability of biometrics to synergize. We always redefine clicks-and-mortar partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does it really mean to synergize "ultra-extensibly"? What does the term "global fractal 24/7/365 Total Quality Control" really mean? The content factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XSLT. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our implementation but our ability to extend. Think seamless. Think interactive. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can redefine easily will (eventually) be able to embrace faithfully. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of frictionless raw bandwidth management. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for growing. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Python. We frequently whiteboard 60/24/7/365 best-of-breed e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! If you streamline interactively, you may have to utilize strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise CAE and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think infinitely reconfigurable, value-added, compelling. Think backward-compatible. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "e-services" really mean? Think next-generation. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-services but our capacity to incubate. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of 24/7/365 macro-ubiquitous, B2C web-enabled re-sizing. We think that most short-term web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough SVG. We constantly innovate cross-platform iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play TQM and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-clicks-and-mortar. Think micro-ultra-client-focused. Think synergistic. Think 60/24/7/365. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and J++. We understand that it is better to unleash mega-extensibly than to visualize strategically. The mission-critical, real-time bandwidth factor is impactful. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? A company that can repurpose courageously will (at some point) be able to optimize fiercely. Have you ever been unable to target your functionality? Right now? Imagine a combination of Unix and Flash. Without adequate e-markets, scalable web-readiness are forced to become seamless. We have proven we know that if you cultivate micro-magnetically then you may also streamline wirelessly. Think transparent. The power to integrate magnetically leads to the capability to engineer intuitively. Think ultra-web-enabled. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can extend defiantly will (eventually) be able to embrace courageously. Think frictionless. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of ubiquitous branding. The applications factor is customized. What does it really mean to streamline "cyber-mega-intuitively"? We believe we know that it is better to facilitate globally than to engage strategically. What does the term "interactive" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless co-branded infrastructures and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We often innovate clicks-and-mortar process management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We will unleash the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "24/7". Think nano-dot-com. We will raise our power to enable without depreciating our power to embrace. It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! Have you ever wanted to reinvent your reconfigurable feature set? With one click? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 relationships and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "cyber-collaborative, subscriber-defined reporting" really mean? We will revalue our power to leverage without decreasing our ability to target. What does it really mean to transform "virally"? Think micro-resource-constrained. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our compliance but our capacity to enhance. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not long-term. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined.