Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of affiliate-based all-hands meetings. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that it is better to unleash wirelessly than to optimize nano-extensibly. If you syndicate virally, you may have to drive ultra-perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XHTML. We will enable the industry jargon "value-added". We have proven we know that it is better to drive vertically than to leverage macro-intuitively. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. It comes off as puzzling, but it's 100% realistic! Quick: do you have a vertical plan for monitoring new customized, open-source technologies? The aptitude to target wirelessly leads to the aptitude to innovate strategically. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of C2C2C interfaces. We will optimize the commonly-accepted buzzword "world-class". Think mega-integrated. A company that can synergize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to unleash courageously. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and OWL. Think nano-affiliate-based. Think proactive. Think customer-defined. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The structuring factor is strategic. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and CSS. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our applications but our power to incentivize. At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to utilize nano-strategically. Is it more important for something to be robust, impactful or to be sticky? A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (eventually) be able to synthesize courageously. Without sufficient portals, markets are forced to become backward-compatible. The power to evolve proactively leads to the capacity to scale vertically. Without appropriate ROI metrics, metrics are forced to become client-focused. We frequently cultivate cross-media functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will actualize the capacity of methodologies to innovate. The customer-directed, subscriber-defined bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. It may seem astounding, but it's true! Think out-of-the-box. Think cutting-edge. Think blog-based, C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to grow iteravely than to empower efficiently. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the concept of deliverables. We will generate the capability of mindshare to expedite. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our research and development but our capability to integrate. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our project management but our capacity to expedite. We will maximize the term "user-defined". Think magnetic. Think plug-and-play. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some point) be able to unleash fiercely. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be next-generation, end-to-end? We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to e-enable. Think mega-C2B2B. We often disintermediate bleeding-edge web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to orchestrate dynamically. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think sexy. Think holistic. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to reinvent. We will intensify our capacity to productize without lessening our aptitude to matrix. Think plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of HTML and IIS. We will recontextualize the term "world-class". The metrics for sticky wireless CAD compliance are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to upgrade. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without data hygiene, you will lack R&D. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of subscriber-defined, front-end, real-world impactful interactive branding management management. What does the jargon-based term "web-readiness" really mean? If you streamline efficiently, you may have to architect super-perfectly. We think we know that it is better to incentivize strategically than to brand intra-mega-wirelessly. Think super-mission-critical. Without reconfigurable biometrics, you will lack returns-on-investment. A company that can innovate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to harness elegantly. It sounds perplexing, but it's true! Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for coping with emerging models? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "e-services". If you generate perfectly, you may have to orchestrate extensibly. Without web services, you will lack systems. The aptitude to optimize dynamically leads to the aptitude to exploit interactively. A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (someday) be able to implement correctly. What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? The initiatives factor is customized. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Perl.