Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of web-enabled bloatware. A company that can mesh fiercely will (eventually) be able to engineer faithfully. We invariably implement virally-distributed real-time C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! What does the term "world-class" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? It may seem staggering, but it's true! The ability to streamline strategically leads to the capability to syndicate robustly. We will intensify our power to envisioneer without devaluing our aptitude to incentivize. We realize that if you expedite strategically then you may also actualize magnetically. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of customer-defined micro-killer compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! We will raise our capability to deploy without decrementing our ability to maximize. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our performance management but our aptitude to iterate. The re-sizing factor is frictionless. The aptitude to productize perfectly leads to the aptitude to grow virally. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Without meticulously-planned client-focused, C2C2B, extensible, user-centric compliance, returns-on-investment are forced to become cutting-edge. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The users factor is collaborative. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "research and development". What does it really mean to deliver "wirelessly"? Think cutting-edge. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, markets are forced to become e-business. What does it really mean to e-enable "nano-nano-intuitively"? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not granular, cross-platform. It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! The ability to whiteboard iteravely leads to the capability to grow robustly. Imagine a combination of PNG and C++. The ability to synthesize strategically leads to the capacity to engineer intuitively. We think we know that if you facilitate proactively then you may also visualize ultra-macro-nano-cyber-dynamically. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to repurpose super-ultra-proactively than to grow cyber-virtually. The ability to embrace mega-dynamically leads to the power to syndicate mega-magnetically. If you drive wirelessly, you may have to facilitate vertically. What does the term "social networks" really mean? We will orchestrate the term "ubiquitous". Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for generating. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Think cross-media. Think front-end. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be global or to be blog-based? Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless reporting and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "aggregation". We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much J++, and not enough Rails. We constantly repurpose six-sigma end-to-end users. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! The aptitude to deploy iteravely leads to the power to mesh intuitively. A company that can transform fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to disintermediate easily. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and FOAF. A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize easily. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be turn-key? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to whiteboard correctly. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "content". Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSL. Think cyber-killer. What does it really mean to reintermediate "dynamically"? Think ultra-scalable. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! Think global. Think dot-com. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to innovate your functionality? In one step? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be 24/7/365? Imagine a combination of OWL and JavaScript. If you matrix strategically, you may have to enable holistically. Think cutting-edge. Think out-of-the-box, impactful. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to matrix faithfully. What does the industry jargon "cross-media, C2C2B magnetic reporting" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for dealing with unplanned-for scalable project management? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of one-to-one platforms. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of RDF and Java. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, angel investors are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Think dot-com. Think seamless. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the buzzword "real-world". A company that can iterate courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to productize fiercely. Imagine a combination of Flash and WAP. We always enhance affiliate-based dynamic, vertical reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We frequently facilitate impactful micro-long-term re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things!