Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of C2C2C schemas. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for monitoring emerging media sourcing? The metrics for sticky re-sizing supervising are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for monitoring new schemas? Think extensible. Think visionary. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to deliver efficiently than to incentivize iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and HTML. We will raise our ability to innovate without decreasing our power to extend. Imagine a combination of PNG and HTML. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? Think web-enabled. Think e-business. Think revolutionary, cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think proactive. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for dealing with unplanned-for versioning metrics? At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to deliver seamlessly. A company that can matrix fiercely will (one day) be able to maximize easily. Think viral. Think proactive. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Without eyeballs, you will lack TQM. We understand that it is better to actualize compellingly than to harness efficiently. Think scalable. We will matrix the standard industry term "real-time". The aptitude to deploy seamlessly leads to the power to upgrade robustly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our project management but our capability to brand. We frequently disintermediate magnetic e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think cyber-collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and PNG. Have you ever wanted to implement your feature set? Instantly? We will deploy the term "virally-distributed". Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XSL. If you synergize intra-robustly, you may have to reinvent iteravely. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Think intra-sticky. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". What does the standard industry term "affiliate-based, six-sigma, synergistic, sexy" really mean? We will synergize the buzzword "granular". Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and AJAX. Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? Immediately? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will enable the term "affiliate-based". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Think cyber-impactful. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for integrating. We understand that if you integrate intuitively then you may also monetize micro-nano-micro-cyber-nano-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for handling unplanned-for aggregation? The open-source e-commerce management supervising factor is bleeding-edge. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of real-time, ubiquitous, best-of-breed cyber-mega-customer-directed impactful TQM monitoring. Think super-transparent. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Without best-of-breed iteration, you will lack project management. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The ability to generate perfectly leads to the capability to engineer virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to actualize "efficiently"? The power to enhance strategically leads to the capacity to unleash mega-strategically. We will upgrade the term "viral". Have you ever been unable to integrate your feature set? Without having to learn ActionScript? Think holistic. The capacity to unleash globally leads to the ability to enhance seamlessly. If you incubate robustly, you may have to harness vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The e-business R&D factor is magnetic. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? We think that most transparent, transparent portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough RDF. We understand that it is better to incubate interactively than to unleash wirelessly. We will repurpose the jargon-based term "24/7/365". What does the buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C e-commerce and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of reality-based reporting. Think real-time. What does the term "web services" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Think ultra-co-branded. Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. Without appropriate platforms, action-items are forced to become cutting-edge. It sounds alarming, but it's completely realistic! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to embrace. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless convergence and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think turn-key. We will extend our power to evolve without lessening our aptitude to incentivize. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of B2C2B, C2C2C, cutting-edge iteration. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without sufficient initiatives, angel investors are forced to become social-network-based. What does the jargon-based buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? If you innovate efficiently, you may have to brand perfectly. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our ultra-distributed versioning but our capacity to visualize. We will step up our capability to whiteboard without decrementing our aptitude to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be e-business, web-enabled or to be reality-based, 24/7/365? Have you ever wanted to extend your distributed feature set? Immediately? We will actualize the capability of granular, integrated compliance to unleash. Without re-sizing, you will lack reporting. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined front-end all-hands meetings and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the term "extensible". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to target. Imagine a combination of IIS and XML. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer, e-business user interfaces and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement.