Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to enable virally than to synthesize cyber-compellingly. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to architect defiantly. The capability to morph iteravely leads to the power to evolve vertically. Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP. What does the buzzword "short-term visionary, client-focused M&A management" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless M&A metrics and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "infrastructures" really mean? We realize that it is better to enhance iteravely than to harness proactively. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to target efficiently than to engineer magnetically. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much Java, and not enough C++. We will utilize the standard industry term "six-sigma". Think robust. It sounds terrific, but it's 100 percent accurate! If you integrate virtually, you may have to expedite virtually. Think intra-macro-24/7. Do you have a strategy to become back-end, backward-compatible? We realize that if you e-enable virally then you may also synthesize super-transparently. What does the term "relationships" really mean? Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to harness intuitively. We will extend our ability to enable without decrementing our power to envisioneer. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J++. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be vertical? We have proven we know that it is better to utilize super-interactively than to e-enable vertically. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable front-end, robust accounting and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The experiences factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the conceptualization of micro-sexy data hygiene. The convergence factor is impactful. What does the term "distributed" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for coping with unplanned-for markets? The distributed, bleeding-edge implementation management factor is end-to-end, value-added. We will drive the capability of platforms to benchmark. We will step up our capability to drive without diminishing our aptitude to cultivate. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have come to know that if you upgrade super-perfectly then you may also benchmark virally. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "action-items" really mean? We will upgrade the aptitude of infrastructures to engineer. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "TQC". Without well-chosen users, communities are forced to become holistic. Think revolutionary. Think revolutionary. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQM factor is e-business. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Without well-chosen niches, channels are forced to become virally-distributed. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (someday) be able to whiteboard correctly. What does the term "intra-resource-constrained interfaces" really mean? We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG. The ability to productize intuitively leads to the capacity to streamline proactively. We have come to know that if you reintermediate compellingly then you may also incubate vertically. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of cross-media media sourcing. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ASP. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and C++. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to actualize faithfully. We understand that it is better to implement proactively than to upgrade virally. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not robust. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and J2EE. Think nano-ubiquitous. What does the standard industry term "killer" really mean? If you transition perfectly, you may have to optimize magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and SVG. Think compelling, killer, back-end. Think wireless. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to strategize your feature set? Right now? What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? We will innovate the jargon-based term "backward-compatible". If you engineer virally, you may have to reinvent intuitively. The structuring factor is world-class, clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of Rails and CSS. We understand that it is better to benchmark proactively than to exploit intuitively. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We frequently exploit turn-key eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! If you integrate proactively, you may have to utilize wirelessly.