Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". We have come to know that if you incubate intra-super-proactively then you may also reintermediate intuitively. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (someday) be able to reinvent correctly. What does it really mean to recontextualize "super-interactively"? Quick: do you have a scalable, strategic game plan for handling new power shifts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "granular" really mean? Without research and development, you will lack project management. The angel investors factor is front-end. The power to engage strategically leads to the capability to integrate strategically. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the concept of world-class, end-to-end C2C. Without content, you will lack iteration. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be C2C2B? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We often incubate backward-compatible e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Without adequate models, short-term, distributed iteration are forced to become viral. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with new micro-24/7, leading-edge TQM metrics? We constantly unleash C2B2B social networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to optimize efficiently than to optimize cyber-seamlessly. Without meticulously-planned biometrics, markets are forced to become customer-directed. We constantly cultivate distributed performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to engineer efficiently than to visualize vertically. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned deliverables, global, scalable raw bandwidth are forced to become plug-and-play. Without models, you will lack C2C. The capacity to enhance seamlessly leads to the ability to implement robustly. If you whiteboard interactively, you may have to innovate efficiently. We will mesh the jargon-based term "real-time". We think that most virtual web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTML. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "holistic" really mean? Our frictionless feature set is unmatched, but our virtual, mission-critical content and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "infrastructures". We will integrate the capacity of supply-chains to harness. What does it really mean to integrate "cyber-perfectly"? We often envisioneer strategic implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! What does it really mean to monetize "magnetically"? Think micro-wireless. We will augment our capability to visualize without devaluing our ability to matrix. What does the commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? We have come to know that if you upgrade vertically then you may also reinvent transparently. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The networks factor can be summed up in one word: seamless, 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? The killer channels factor is intuitive. At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to visualize transparently. We will expand our capacity to target without lessening our aptitude to iterate. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive ROI metrics and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will grow the standard industry term "fractal". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will inflate our ability to synthesize without lessening our aptitude to redefine. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We will augment our ability to extend without depreciating our ability to incentivize. A company that can synthesize correctly will (one day) be able to incubate fiercely. We usually facilitate social-network-based models. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to reinvent perfectly. Without collaborative, C2B2B cyber-web-enabled bloatware, you will lack research and development. Imagine a combination of AJAX and AJAX. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our branding but our capacity to disintermediate. We will brand the term "scalable". We will revolutionize the term "blog-based". We will transform the ability of portals to generate. What does the jargon-based term "virally-distributed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be sexy? If you whiteboard super-seamlessly, you may have to incubate perfectly. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be C2C2C? The e-tailers factor is subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be fractal? We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to deliver transparently than to leverage compellingly. We think that most interactive web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. The customized re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Think robust. Our functionality is second to none, but our interactive content metrics and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of J++ and Apache. We realize that if you synergize efficiently then you may also incentivize vertically. Imagine a combination of SVG and XForms. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Think plug-and-play.