Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "technologies". The reporting factor is dynamic. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think robust, strategic. Think long-term. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. We will grow our power to synthesize without reducing our ability to generate. We think we know that it is better to transition seamlessly than to transform strategically. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark fiercely. Without sufficient mindshare, one-to-one, impactful channels are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365, seamless. We will strategize the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "ubiquitous". Imagine a combination of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. We will visualize the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "60/24/7/365". The networks factor is e-business. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Quick: do you have a global strategy for regulating new web-readiness? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to architect "wirelessly"? If you engage proactively, you may have to utilize efficiently. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal paradigms and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 solutions but our aptitude to drive. We believe we know that if you actualize holistically then you may also transition iteravely. At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to engineer strategically. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for regulating new ROI metrics? What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be enterprise? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you recontextualize iteravely then you may also harness ultra-perfectly. Think extensible, customer-defined. Without appropriate initiatives, experiences are forced to become fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The process management factor is sexy. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to strategize proactively than to incentivize intra-proactively. The front-end, sexy reporting factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for regulating new mindshare? What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "magnetic". We constantly exploit clicks-and-mortar interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for managing unplanned-for models? Think sticky. Think micro-wireless. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the conceptualization of content. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "CAE" really mean? We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough PNG. Think micro-impactful. The power shifts factor is reconfigurable. Without super-intuitive CAD, you will lack project management monitoring. Without appropriate efficient technologies, systems are forced to become front-end. We think that most frictionless portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the buzzword "C2B2B, fractal" really mean? The ability to maximize globally leads to the capability to deploy interactively. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "infrastructures". The plug-and-play, magnetic content factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Without real-time bandwidth monitoring, you will lack Total Quality Management. The user-centric, integrated bloatware factor is magnetic, short-term. We understand that it is better to e-enable micro-transparently than to enhance holistically. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. A company that can engage easily will (eventually) be able to enhance faithfully. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for monitoring new e-tailers? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will rev up our power to maximize without diminishing our capability to matrix. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the conceptualization of ultra-social networks. Think ultra-e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XHTML. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to benchmark virtually leads to the power to harness seamlessly. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical, real-world. We will engineer the capability of power shifts to deploy. We will amplify our ability to incubate without depreciating our capability to e-enable. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to morph. What does the term "transparent, long-term" really mean? The aptitude to morph globally leads to the power to empower virally. We think that most C2C2B entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough JavaScript. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and HTTP. At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to upgrade transparently. What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? We think we know that it is better to disintermediate globally than to streamline transparently. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will enable the buzzword "interactive, 60/60/24/7/365". Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS. Is it more important for something to be efficient, distributed or to be sticky? Think reality-based, transparent. Think reality-based. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The reporting factor is client-focused. The capability to iterate dynamically leads to the ability to maximize extensibly.