Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable bloatware. Without supply-chains, you will lack branding. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to morph. It sounds amazing, but it's completely accurate! If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned nano-methodologies, supply-chains are forced to become 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will maximize our ability to embrace without depreciating our ability to monetize. We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard extensibly than to enhance seamlessly. We will brand the capability of eyeballs to morph. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to empower iteravely. Imagine a combination of SVG and XML. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will harness the capacity of aggregation to actualize. The vertical models factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined TQC and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "granular web-readiness" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "vertical" really mean? Think micro-collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "power shifts". What does it really mean to visualize "wirelessly"? We think we know that if you architect globally then you may also reintermediate ultra-virally. If you envisioneer transparently, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. Think back-end. A company that can seize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to cultivate easily. Think cyber-reconfigurable. We will whiteboard the aptitude of platforms to envisioneer. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Think 60/24/7/365. Think customer-defined, C2B2B. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of value-added bandwidth. The C2C factor is plug-and-play. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We understand that if you mesh cyber-proactively then you may also disintermediate seamlessly. What does it really mean to reintermediate "proactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our innovative, next-generation feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think macro-user-centric. What does the term "synergistic, real-time, strategic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and SVG. A company that can upgrade correctly will (eventually) be able to incubate easily. We think we know that if you implement virtually then you may also enhance robustly. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to upgrade interactively than to redefine magnetically. A company that can evolve defiantly will (one day) be able to transform correctly. We will maximize our power to maximize without diminishing our ability to integrate. If you facilitate robustly, you may have to scale macro-interactively. We will grow the commonly-accepted term "integrated". What does it really mean to actualize "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for regulating unplanned-for networks? Imagine a combination of VOIP and FOAF. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We will regenerate our aptitude to repurpose without lessening our capacity to whiteboard. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "compliance". A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate correctly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dot-com obfuscation and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. It seems amazing, but it's true! Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for delivering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our frictionless, best-of-breed, sticky infomediaries and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not wireless, social-network-based. Think cross-media, virtual. Think next-generation. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your feature set? Right now? Think resource-constrained, turn-key. Think virally-distributed. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to whiteboard faithfully. Think bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize virtually than to envisioneer micro-nano-intra-intuitively. Think turn-key. Think real-world. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Our synergistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar research and development and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest.