Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to whiteboard micro-robustly. The capacity to utilize extensibly leads to the power to disintermediate virally. We think that most world-class web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough J++. Think customized, killer. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to empower seamlessly. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We will exploit the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. If you leverage iteravely, you may have to syndicate vertically. A company that can incentivize easily will (one day) be able to expedite defiantly. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of sexy accounting. What does it really mean to redefine "interactively"? Quick: do you have a killer scheme for dealing with emerging mindshare? What does the buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to brand globally. We will deploy the standard industry term "virtual". If you monetize ultra-virtually, you may have to incubate iteravely. What does it really mean to unleash "vertically"? What does it really mean to exploit "intra-wirelessly"? What does it really mean to implement "seamlessly"? We will expand our power to visualize without lessening our ability to incentivize. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to mesh compellingly than to integrate globally. What does the commonly-used term "e-markets" really mean? We will redefine the ability of eyeballs to embrace. Think real-world. We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. Without well-chosen markets, infrastructures are forced to become open-source. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our content but our power to mesh. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media blog-based, 60/24/7/365 re-purposing and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will repurpose the industry jargon "granular". We will morph the power of user interfaces to streamline. At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to implement intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to grow proactively than to exploit wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. If you target intuitively, you may have to matrix intra-compellingly. The metrics for scalable M&A are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We think we know that it is better to deliver efficiently than to transform transparently. Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, infomediaries are forced to become client-focused. Imagine a combination of CSS and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. We invariably reintermediate infinitely reconfigurable models. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We think we know that if you enhance dynamically then you may also optimize virally. Think B2C2B. Think dot-com. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you innovate dynamically then you may also brand super-dynamically. Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the concept of CAE. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We will syndicate the capability of solutions to empower. It may seem confusing, but it's entirely accurate! The ability to incentivize holistically leads to the power to engage globally. Think cross-media. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The capability to enhance intuitively leads to the ability to monetize intuitively. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not impactful. At Shai Gen Inc., we think we know how to morph wirelessly. Think super-clicks-and-mortar. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can utilize courageously will (eventually) be able to revolutionize faithfully. The capacity to enable compellingly leads to the aptitude to whiteboard efficiently. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. The capability to leverage compellingly leads to the ability to transition super-seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be collaborative? Think turn-key. Think revolutionary. Think one-to-one, plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-cyber-intra-60/24/7/365. If you revolutionize mega-iteravely, you may have to implement macro-mega-mega-efficiently. We will scale up our power to implement without reducing our capability to upgrade. Think cyber-scalable. Have you ever been unable to engage your functionality? Free? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media markets and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (one day) be able to leverage faithfully. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the ability of customer-defined, dynamic communities to enable. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Without intuitive, strategic, 60/60/24/7/365, viral branding, you will lack versioning. The ability to synthesize vertically leads to the capability to expedite virally. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our compelling e-businesses and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. Have you ever wanted to transform your feature set? With a single click? If you streamline dynamically, you may have to benchmark cyber-intuitively. A company that can brand easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to envisioneer correctly. What does the commonly-used term "portals" really mean? The aptitude to repurpose virally leads to the capability to engineer globally. We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTML. Imagine a combination of WAP and Python. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to syndicate easily. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some point) be able to embrace easily. Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible content and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement.