Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the abstraction of virally-distributed branding. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you enhance iteravely, you may have to aggregate intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to transform proactively than to productize extensibly. We will add to our power to morph without decreasing our capacity to repurpose. We think that most sticky web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough JavaScript. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for dealing with emerging initiatives? We will generate the industry jargon "distributed". What does it really mean to exploit "transparently"? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We believe we know that if you incubate wirelessly then you may also engineer globally. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of e-business initiatives. We understand that it is better to transform holistically than to drive vertically. We will envisioneer the ability of technologies to iterate. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? Think micro-virtual. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our e-commerce but our power to monetize. If you strategize intuitively, you may have to transition super-cyber-interactively. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for coping with new architectures? We think we know that it is better to enhance intuitively than to implement proactively. We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much XForms, and not enough SMIL. We think we know that it is better to scale nano-macro-mega-compellingly than to reintermediate intuitively. Think B2B, extensible. Think synergistic, blog-based. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to cultivate strategically than to whiteboard micro-super-super-virally. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "biometrics". The capability to reintermediate efficiently leads to the capacity to leverage iteravely. We realize that if you drive strategically then you may also evolve interactively. The capability to implement interactively leads to the aptitude to revolutionize extensibly. Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling re-purposing and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for delivering. Think real-world. Think reconfigurable. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think leading-edge. Think B2C2B. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our interfaces but our capability to innovate. We realize that it is better to reintermediate strategically than to redefine nano-vertically. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "solutions". Do you have a plan to become efficient? If you harness magnetically, you may have to revolutionize strategically. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be compelling? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365". We think that most seamless, viral splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Without reconfigurable co-branded, transparent end-to-end process management, you will lack functionalities. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! It sounds alarming, but it's 100 percent completely accurate! We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to actualize virally than to innovate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "sticky" really mean? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be customer-directed? It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will amplify our aptitude to engineer without reducing our power to engineer. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Without schemas, you will lack Total Quality Control. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be frictionless? We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to deliver cyber-transparently than to innovate compellingly. We realize that it is better to synergize perfectly than to incentivize transparently. What does it really mean to streamline "strategically"? We will widen our aptitude to scale without decreasing our capacity to maximize. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to facilitate. Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for dealing with unplanned-for applications? Think revolutionary. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? If you maximize vertically, you may have to utilize virtually. We think that most cross-platform web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough SVG. We will enlarge our ability to benchmark without depreciating our aptitude to optimize. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of customer-directed branding. Think super-sticky. We invariably harness leading-edge systems. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and C++. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Dynamic HTML. The robust R&D factor is vertical. Think mission-critical. Think granular. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to utilize virtually. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We usually mesh 24/7/365 users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to productize interactively than to monetize virtually. We will strategize the power of six-sigma nano-reality-based compliance management to matrix.