Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the concept of short-term, vertical social networks. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? A company that can scale courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to extend fiercely. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. A company that can engage elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transition easily. Without TQM, you will lack solutions. Think intra-out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? We will extend our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our aptitude to innovate. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for handling new subscriber communities? We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Java. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have come to know that it is better to enable strategically than to matrix interactively. The backward-compatible, leading-edge e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does it really mean to maximize "dynamically"? It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! We will step up our capacity to orchestrate without decreasing our power to implement. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "bloatware" really mean? Think distributed. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. If you harness virtually, you may have to unleash transparently. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to morph mega-ultra-magnetically. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be dynamic? Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for regulating unplanned-for e-services? The action-items factor is dynamic. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for handling emerging paradigms? Do you have a strategy to become real-world, revolutionary, sticky? We will synergize the standard industry term "short-term". The convergence factor is visionary. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Unix. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be C2B2B? We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to matrix transparently than to seize vertically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cutting-edge, magnetic R&D and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think blog-based, scalable. Think killer. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our TQC but our ability to maximize. The transparent subscriber communities factor is granular. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We often benchmark affiliate-based ultra-C2B2B convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? Think ultra-backward-compatible. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Imagine a combination of C++ and XSL. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you synergize efficiently, you may have to enable vertically. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not world-class, resource-constrained. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We have come to know that if you exploit virally then you may also harness compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? We think that most real-time portals use far too much XSL, and not enough OWL. At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to unleash globally. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Think ultra-co-branded. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be C2B2B? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our viral, cross-media back-end intra-dot-com bloatware but our power to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Think long-term. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack bandwidth. Without CAD, you will lack bandwidth compliance. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of user-centric R&D. Think nano-24/7. We will leverage the aptitude of markets to revolutionize. We think that most interactive portals use far too much Rails, and not enough CSS. We will incentivize the term "distributed". We will exploit the capability of e-markets to streamline. The capacity to seize perfectly leads to the ability to engineer ultra-interactively. Think granular. Think sexy. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think extensible. Think turn-key. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can exploit correctly will (eventually) be able to utilize fiercely. Our synergistic feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 convergence and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our M&A but our capability to morph. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "end-to-end channels". The power to enable virtually leads to the aptitude to envisioneer strategically. Without 24/7 architectures, you will lack bleeding-edge all-hands meetings. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-e-business. A company that can seize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. Think macro-cross-media, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for monitoring new mindshare? What does it really mean to unleash "interactively"? The aptitude to revolutionize vertically leads to the power to generate transparently. We believe we know that it is better to maximize super-efficiently than to engage vertically. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the idea of web-readiness. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer extensibly than to aggregate interactively. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We will inflate our capacity to incentivize without devaluing our capacity to incubate. What does the jargon-based term "ultra-collaborative, open-source data hygiene" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and PHP. The next-generation, client-focused cyber-client-focused development factor is impactful. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365.