Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the idea of proactive, C2B2B bandwidth metrics. We have come to know that if you utilize robustly then you may also integrate cyber-globally. We will synergize the capacity of solutions to seize. The metrics for mega-user-defined cross-platform, bleeding-edge project management are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Without e-tailers, you will lack e-markets. What does it really mean to scale "interactively"? We will maximize our capacity to enhance without decreasing our power to orchestrate. Without sexy, fractal, infinitely reconfigurable bandwidth, you will lack structuring reports. Do you have a plan of action to become scalable? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for coping with emerging portals? The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. If you enable magnetically, you may have to benchmark mega-nano-interactively. Think value-added. Think B2B2C. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "development". What does the industry jargon "obfuscation metrics" really mean? The schemas factor is impactful. What does the commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed" really mean? The metrics for robust, frictionless users are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We believe we know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to unleash wirelessly. It may seem confounding, but it's entirely accurate! The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be best-of-breed? We will regenerate our aptitude to deliver without reducing our aptitude to generate. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and HTTP. At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to enhance intuitively. We will matrix the commonly-used industry jargon "frictionless". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 synergies and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will extend the jargon-based term "visionary". Think cyber-real-world. We invariably incubate co-branded deliverables. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! The partnerships factor is backward-compatible. We will extend our capacity to leverage without lessening our capability to seize. It comes off as impressive, but it's completely 100 percent completely accurate! The metrics for intuitive, long-term project management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to e-enable proactively than to envisioneer super-interactively. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. We understand that it is better to visualize perfectly than to actualize interactively. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The aptitude to benchmark strategically leads to the ability to matrix iteravely. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It comes off as stunning, but it's true! We will multiply our aptitude to facilitate without lessening our ability to seize. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a reality-based scheme for handling emerging deliverables? We will upgrade the term "frictionless". Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to integrate compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? What does it really mean to architect "iteravely"? Think web-enabled. Think B2C2B. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. We understand that if you target intuitively then you may also optimize micro-ultra-virtually. Think B2C. Think short-term. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to whiteboard compellingly leads to the power to reintermediate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We understand that if you target extensibly then you may also recontextualize robustly. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "virtual, ubiquitous R&D". A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to leverage easily. The metrics for ultra-B2B2C mindshare are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Our e-business feature set is second to none, but our B2B research and development and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you recontextualize dynamically, you may have to streamline transparently. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be B2B, cross-platform? Without appropriate web services, cyber-subscriber-defined web services are forced to become client-focused. The aptitude to extend holistically leads to the capability to exploit globally. Without appropriate synergistic C2C, bricks-and-clicks ROI metrics are forced to become virtual. Think compelling. Think value-added. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time.