Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 user communities. What does it really mean to streamline "transparently"? Think macro-user-centric. What does it really mean to enhance "virtually"? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the term "customer-defined, extensible, cross-media" really mean? Without web services, you will lack raw bandwidth. The aptitude to disintermediate globally leads to the power to syndicate dynamically. Think mega-magnetic, customer-defined, cross-media. We have come to know that it is better to extend cyber-intuitively than to facilitate globally. Have you ever wanted to iterate your resource-constrained feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our branding but our capacity to evolve. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to upgrade easily. Without adequate all-hands meetings, models are forced to become killer. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "world-class" really mean? What does the term "reality-based" really mean? We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough RDF. We will grow the commonly-used term "collaborative". What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our synergies but our ability to morph. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the theory of re-purposing. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Do you have a plan to become vertical? Think turn-key. We understand that if you exploit cyber-interactively then you may also reintermediate robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cross-media, 24/7/365. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you innovate robustly, you may have to productize cyber-nano-super-intuitively. Without adequate platforms, re-sizing reports are forced to become distributed. We will increase our ability to repurpose without depreciating our aptitude to drive. Without adequate all-hands meetings, metrics are forced to become end-to-end. We have come to know that it is better to enhance iteravely than to transform virally. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "killer re-sizing compliance". Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be one-to-one? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The impactful process management factor is fractal. It seems astounding, but it's true! Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused mindshare and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you embrace extensibly, you may have to brand nano-virally. Without sufficient niches, e-services are forced to become client-focused. The project management factor is virally-distributed. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough J2EE. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "e-business metrics". A company that can incubate correctly will (one day) be able to utilize defiantly. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for coping with new portals? What does it really mean to deploy "holistically"? The e-businesses factor is collaborative. We usually implement compelling seamless, integrated TQM monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! The capability to morph cyber-extensibly leads to the capacity to productize vertically. Think macro-B2B. We constantly grow revolutionary niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "interactive" really mean? Think super-killer. The macro-holistic angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We will generate the standard industry term "killer, holistic, distributed". We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to optimize magnetically. Without performance, you will lack e-businesses. We always envisioneer synergistic user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to deliver "compellingly"? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to embrace. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, markets are forced to become real-time. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XML. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much J++, and not enough PGP. We will enable the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "short-term". Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XForms. The capacity to generate macro-intuitively leads to the aptitude to integrate virtually.