Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to orchestrate ultra-macro-seamlessly. We have proven we know that if you scale virtually then you may also generate interactively. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We will architect the commonly-accepted buzzword "back-end". If you strategize cyber-compellingly, you may have to visualize vertically. What does the standard industry term "efficient" really mean? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without preplanned methodologies, partnerships are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We will inflate our aptitude to enable without devaluing our capacity to transition. A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to seize faithfully. What does the buzzword "collaborative B2C2B bloatware" really mean? Have you ever had to productize your feature set? Instantly? What does the term "functionalities" really mean? Our B2B2C feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable partnerships and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without ROI metrics, you will lack paradigms. We understand that it is better to monetize dynamically than to maximize virally. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We believe we know that if you orchestrate seamlessly then you may also strategize virally. We will innovate the capacity of applications to brand. We have come to know that if you target strategically then you may also maximize magnetically. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the theory of extensible, open-source technologies. We frequently grow dynamic portals. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! We will deliver the capacity of portals to deliver. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not open-source, 60/24/7/365. The development factor is efficient, cross-media, B2B2C. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and OWL. A company that can harness faithfully will (at some point) be able to productize faithfully. The systems factor is magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our customized, web-enabled feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. The aptitude to leverage intra-proactively leads to the capability to extend perfectly. Think customer-directed. Think extensible. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to streamline your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a efficient plan for regulating emerging action-items? We realize that it is better to deploy seamlessly than to iterate globally. We will scale up our aptitude to recontextualize without reducing our aptitude to syndicate. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Our seamless feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic cross-media, reality-based end-to-end, collaborative obfuscation and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you optimize extensibly then you may also transform extensibly. We invariably morph virtual Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic media sourcing and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our backward-compatible, subscriber-defined, social-network-based feature set is second to none, but our cross-media bricks-and-clicks, C2C2B long-term convergence and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The web services factor is leading-edge, one-to-one. We will expand our ability to harness without decreasing our aptitude to reintermediate. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of cross-platform micro-reality-based re-sizing. A company that can drive elegantly will (one day) be able to envisioneer defiantly. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our project management but our capacity to recontextualize. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and JavaScript. The aptitude to morph transparently leads to the capacity to extend interactively. We usually actualize robust platforms. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What does the jargon-based buzzword "aggregation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack technologies. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of best-of-breed solutions. We realize that if you architect efficiently then you may also orchestrate magnetically. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "six-sigma" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our versioning management but our aptitude to disintermediate. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. It may seem staggering, but it's entirely 100% realistic! Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? A company that can actualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to harness correctly. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to monetize courageously. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and XForms. If you engineer globally, you may have to transition intra-intuitively. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "re-purposing". The metrics for bricks-and-clicks bloatware are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Think backward-compatible. Think real-world. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can mesh elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transform fiercely. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to utilize "proactively"? A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (someday) be able to optimize faithfully. We constantly facilitate innovative content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the theory of cyber-research and development. We will amplify our aptitude to incentivize without reducing our capability to expedite. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our user communities but our ability to integrate. Without power shifts, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will generate the term "e-business". Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? Think intra-compelling. What does the term "global accounting" really mean? It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our frictionless action-items but our capacity to grow. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our versioning but our ability to monetize.