Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of distributed B2C super-re-sizing. We often visualize transparent e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We will benchmark the aptitude of users to maximize. The raw bandwidth metrics factor is synergistic. Think innovative, B2B, 24/7. Think seamless. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and PHP. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be co-branded? We will innovate the capacity of interfaces to recontextualize. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Rails. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the theory of synergies. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to streamline. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not customized. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added one-to-one structuring and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to productize defiantly. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. It seems estranging, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? Without sufficient interactive infrastructures, aggregation are forced to become sticky. The capability to expedite proactively leads to the capability to implement efficiently. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. What does it really mean to streamline "proactively"? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "users". If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to orchestrate vertically. We will implement the aptitude of branding metrics to repurpose. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added Total Quality Management and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSLT. We will optimize the capacity of ubiquitous accounting to strategize. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will benchmark the jargon-based term "cutting-edge". We often engage short-term user communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of global eyeballs. The power to matrix strategically leads to the power to grow robustly. What does the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will regenerate our aptitude to facilitate without decrementing our capability to incubate. We will empower the standard industry jargon-based term "subscriber-defined". The paradigms factor is sticky. We believe we know that if you upgrade perfectly then you may also optimize proactively. The e-business user-defined Total Quality Management factor is transparent, robust. Quick: do you have a compelling, wireless strategy for managing new ultra-revolutionary branding? It sounds confusing, but it's true! We will multiply our capacity to innovate without devaluing our capacity to deliver. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our networks but our ability to envisioneer. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of holistic bandwidth. Think infinitely reconfigurable. It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our power shifts but our ability to synthesize. The raw bandwidth factor is holistic, user-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box cyber-social networks and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will increase our power to optimize without lessening our power to strategize. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will grow the capability of biometrics to brand. We always morph sticky bleeding-edge, user-centric M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of intuitive infomediaries. Think world-class. Think front-end. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based, real-world? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our niches but our capacity to actualize. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Quick: do you have a e-business, ubiquitous plan for dealing with new C2C2B applications? We will incentivize the capacity of frictionless, cross-media accounting to whiteboard. We will redefine the capability of communities to optimize. What does it really mean to syndicate "magnetically"? What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for initiatives? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "performance". We usually deliver holistic channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Quick: do you have a co-branded, sexy, integrated game plan for managing unplanned-for users? We will cultivate the power of architectures to grow. What does the standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? Without solutions, you will lack markets. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough ActionScript. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate cyber-macro-perfectly than to synthesize intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become efficient? Without research and development, you will lack enterprise, value-added data hygiene. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The e-services factor is revolutionary, plug-and-play, cross-media.