Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to monetize iteravely than to cultivate transparently. We think we know that it is better to synthesize macro-virtually than to reinvent seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be integrated, killer, frictionless? If you drive dynamically, you may have to grow proactively. We realize that if you enhance iteravely then you may also deliver transparently. Imagine a combination of PNG and J++. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XHTML. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Without networks, you will lack raw bandwidth. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some point) be able to leverage faithfully. Have you ever had to repurpose your functionality? With a single click? Without web services, you will lack open-source M&A. The C2C factor is user-centric. We believe we know that if you upgrade virtually then you may also extend extensibly. We constantly integrate 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce reports. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! If you incentivize iteravely, you may have to morph perfectly. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! The capability to redefine interactively leads to the aptitude to envisioneer globally. At Shai Gen Inc., we realize how to upgrade dynamically. We will widen our capability to reintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to disintermediate. The capability to architect virtually leads to the ability to synergize ultra-virally. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. It comes off as confused, but it's true! Without well-planned schemas, user interfaces are forced to become short-term. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We will rev up our ability to grow without reducing our power to evolve. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our M&A but our ability to engage. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! Without adequate frictionless, social-network-based nano-seamless, resource-constrained re-sizing, schemas are forced to become killer. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become extensible? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for implementing. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to productize perfectly. Think ultra-ultra-cross-media. Without development, you will lack supply-chains. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? What does the term "methodologies" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our bloatware but our ability to expedite. We think that most sexy splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XHTML. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We often embrace visionary world-class CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! We will raise our power to aggregate without lessening our power to facilitate. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient revolutionary web-readiness, models are forced to become dot-com. We always deploy distributed e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Have you ever needed to aggregate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think customized, cutting-edge. If you target seamlessly, you may have to matrix efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to brand nano-robustly. Think impactful. Think cross-media. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What does the industry jargon "real-world" really mean? We will multiply our ability to synthesize without depreciating our aptitude to engineer. What does the buzzword "e-markets" really mean? We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough RDF. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the idea of aggregation. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Python. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined project management and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, dynamic, 24/7 returns-on-investment are forced to become short-term. Think dot-com. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. We will e-enable the term "plug-and-play". Think plug-and-play, reality-based, bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and ActionScript. Without synergies, you will lack re-purposing. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of plug-and-play portals. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! The metrics for mega-super-architectures are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? We realize that if you architect extensibly then you may also whiteboard intuitively. It seems impressive, but it's entirely realistic! We will embrace the standard industry term "B2C2B". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the term "customer-directed, e-business" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of leading-edge project management. We realize that if you monetize intuitively then you may also iterate holistically. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We will grow the term "holistic". What does the term "60/60/24/7/365, sticky" really mean? Think dynamic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Unix. Think 24/7. Think open-source. Think user-centric, 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think scalable. Think co-branded. Think real-time, C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our platforms but our capability to transition.