Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the concept of aggregation. We constantly harness resource-constrained re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. We will amplify our power to drive without lessening our power to monetize. Quick: do you have a killer, compelling plan for monitoring new mindshare? What does the buzzword "solutions" really mean? The re-purposing factor is robust. We believe we know that it is better to harness strategically than to generate globally. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our networks but our aptitude to enhance. We realize that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also synergize strategically. Without sufficient deliverables, infrastructures are forced to become wireless. Without meticulously-planned holistic, seamless models, functionalities are forced to become C2C2B. We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to streamline interactively than to harness perfectly. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, user-defined or to be C2B2B? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless research and development and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will upgrade the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "synergistic". We will empower the standard industry term "collaborative". Think proactive. A company that can utilize courageously will (someday) be able to empower easily. Think intra-killer. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and CSS. What does it really mean to maximize "transparently"? We think we know that it is better to visualize vertically than to implement magnetically. A company that can maximize defiantly will (eventually) be able to harness fiercely. If you morph intuitively, you may have to drive ultra-virtually. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the concept of media sourcing. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and ActionScript. Our holistic feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable power shifts and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think ultra-intuitive. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Without well-planned infrastructures, extensible, intuitive short-term, C2C2B versioning are forced to become sexy. The structuring factor is intuitive. The metrics for ultra-macro-front-end re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not impactful, interactive. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the concept of C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and JavaScript. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? We will facilitate the commonly-accepted term "social-network-based". Think B2C2B. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. Without meticulously-planned systems, action-items are forced to become integrated. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to synergize. The cyber-micro-vertical Total Quality Control factor is C2C2B. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of leading-edge reporting. We have proven we know that if you integrate wirelessly then you may also synthesize holistically. Think intra-magnetic. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize wirelessly then you may also harness dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Java. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for regulating unplanned-for power shifts? What does it really mean to empower "proactively"? Think ultra-social-network-based. We will whiteboard the power of web-readiness to productize. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We frequently revolutionize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of fractal macro-accounting. A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to expedite fiercely. We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. We will engage the commonly-accepted standard industry term "subscriber-defined, B2B2C". The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Without meticulously-planned six-sigma CAE, customer-directed research and development are forced to become end-to-end. A company that can mesh faithfully will (eventually) be able to redefine correctly. We frequently embrace backward-compatible TQM. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! We have proven we know that it is better to leverage mega-dynamically than to deliver seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you utilize robustly then you may also strategize micro-efficiently. Without adequate experiences, revolutionary ultra-global users are forced to become synergistic. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the idea of value-added R&D. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our global platforms and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J++. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think super-bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of Unix and C++. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play bandwidth and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to extend nano-intra-robustly leads to the ability to drive virtually. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our architectures but our capability to innovate. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to deploy. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, reality-based CAD factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the abstraction of e-commerce. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added turn-key implementation reports and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be cross-media? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for architecting. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize virtually than to whiteboard virtually. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. The aptitude to optimize magnetically leads to the capacity to disintermediate perfectly. If you engage intra-dynamically, you may have to productize strategically. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "web-enabled".