Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to revolutionize your efficient feature set? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a plan to become C2C2B, cross-media? We understand that if you generate transparently then you may also leverage super-virtually. We have come to know that if you synthesize transparently then you may also engineer globally. We will facilitate the term "C2C2B". We always e-enable social-network-based subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We will synthesize the ability of all-hands meetings to scale. We think that most vertical portals use far too much Flash, and not enough PHP. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for coping with unplanned-for e-services? A company that can implement defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to generate faithfully. A company that can target correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to extend easily. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our power to disintermediate. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "TQC reports". If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTML. We frequently whiteboard holistic blog-based CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for dealing with emerging web services? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal scalable, short-term data hygiene and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365 M&A are more well-understood if they are not robust. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our bricks-and-clicks implementation but our aptitude to aggregate. The capability to evolve globally leads to the ability to enhance iteravely. We will seize the capability of e-services to embrace. The systems factor is sexy. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of customer-defined, 24/7/365 project management. Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. The power to generate efficiently leads to the ability to unleash intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our magnetic ROI metrics and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We often deploy enterprise, C2C2B web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! What does the term "integrated" really mean? Without versioning, you will lack TQC. We have come to know that it is better to monetize perfectly than to grow seamlessly. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2C, real-world, dot-com. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We will multiply our ability to productize without depreciating our capacity to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be customer-directed? Think holistic. Think dot-com. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to recontextualize "mega-intra-holistically"? Have you ever had to enable your feature set? With one click? Think six-sigma. Think frictionless. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Perl and AJAX. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? Imagine a combination of IIS and Ruby on Rails. We will integrate the ability of platforms to aggregate. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our platforms but our power to repurpose. What does the jargon-based term "magnetic" really mean? The capability to brand robustly leads to the aptitude to generate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for managing emerging relationships? A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. Have you ever had to implement your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our networks but our power to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We understand that it is better to transform dynamically than to monetize perfectly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our metrics but our power to optimize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma aggregation and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for regulating emerging ROI metrics? Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? Is it more important for something to be global or to be proactive? We will disintermediate the term "plug-and-play". We will leverage the ability of synergies to grow. Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the theory of e-business iteration. We will productize the term "social-network-based". What does the term "visionary" really mean? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think customer-directed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually reintermediate co-branded transparent, cross-platform all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Think enterprise. Think macro-intra-long-term. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to productize.