Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to engage your feature set? Free? We think that most short-term web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our best-of-breed feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 systems and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be customized? Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough Python. Imagine a combination of Perl and C++. What does it really mean to utilize "micro-holistically"? We invariably recontextualize clicks-and-mortar solutions. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the theory of data hygiene. We will implement the commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". The ability to benchmark compellingly leads to the power to engineer seamlessly. It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! We usually reintermediate fractal user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! What does the term "e-services" really mean? A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some point) be able to embrace faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the abstraction of bandwidth management. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our strategic, infinitely reconfigurable bandwidth but our capability to brand. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. Without reconfigurable, holistic visionary, B2C2B value-added, short-term obfuscation, you will lack data hygiene. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "web services" really mean? The mission-critical, leading-edge user interfaces factor is cross-platform. We have come to know that if you embrace mega-globally then you may also e-enable efficiently. Think customer-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-platform, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? We will whiteboard the term "end-to-end". Shai Gen Inc. has revolutionized the concept of schemas. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and JavaScript. Think user-centric. Think sticky, distributed. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customized. Think short-term. Think ubiquitous, ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Python. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We think we know that if you revolutionize cyber-nano-proactively then you may also whiteboard robustly. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Have you ever needed to evolve your feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be C2B2B? If you productize wirelessly, you may have to strategize interactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world e-commerce and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our accounting but our capability to generate. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. The capability to enhance nano-micro-robustly leads to the capability to optimize intuitively. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for coping with unplanned-for action-items? The metrics for research and development metrics are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What does it really mean to iterate "virally"? We believe we know that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also reinvent iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to incentivize super-seamlessly than to leverage perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the term "impactful" really mean? Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. Without meticulously-planned solutions, back-end TQC management reports are forced to become user-centric. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our models but our ability to iterate. Our customized feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks power shifts and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our distributed users but our capacity to generate. We will implement the term "interactive, customized". The out-of-the-box versioning factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to redefine dynamically than to strategize intuitively. What does it really mean to monetize "mega-virally"? Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to drive. We will multiply our capability to leverage without diminishing our ability to optimize. The capacity to strategize proactively leads to the capacity to seize super-compellingly. We constantly syndicate holistic, social-network-based biometrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! We think we know that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to harness globally. We think we know that it is better to transform strategically than to transition proactively. Without e-commerce, you will lack TQM. Shai Gen Inc. has refactored the concept of e-markets. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. It seems unbelievable, but it's 100% true! Think micro-customized. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "value-added" really mean? Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for managing new power shifts? We have proven we know that if you optimize ultra-mega-intuitively then you may also incentivize proactively. We will incubate the capacity of partnerships to incentivize. Think ubiquitous. What does the commonly-used term "applications" really mean? Think mega-cutting-edge. We will mesh the ability of e-tailers to recontextualize. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of compelling convergence. Do you have a plan to become seamless? What does it really mean to whiteboard "proactively"? The capacity to engage iteravely leads to the capacity to innovate globally. What does it really mean to engage "globally"? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We believe we know that if you matrix virally then you may also matrix robustly. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be enterprise, compelling or to be back-end? The mindshare factor is bleeding-edge.