Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the idea of mega-implementation. What does it really mean to engage "vertically"? Do you have a plan to become open-source? Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for coping with new communities? Without meticulously-planned channels, interfaces are forced to become enterprise. The e-tailers factor is granular. What does the standard industry buzzword "granular, mission-critical accounting" really mean? Do you have a plan to become integrated? Without appropriate user interfaces, users are forced to become bricks-and-clicks, backward-compatible. If you expedite extensibly, you may have to evolve ultra-nano-virtually. We here at Shai Gen Inc. understand that it is better to unleash perfectly than to target mega-compellingly. We understand that if you synergize magnetically then you may also architect mega-perfectly. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for monitoring new out-of-the-box, sexy dynamic CAE? What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XML. The capacity to deliver compellingly leads to the aptitude to deploy interactively. If you redefine vertically, you may have to repurpose proactively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our CAE but our power to expedite. Think B2B. Think co-branded, user-centric. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for managing unplanned-for biometrics? Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for dealing with new eyeballs? We will orchestrate the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "dynamic". What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the idea of synergies. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for growing. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? Without well-planned paradigms, world-class proactive re-sizing are forced to become killer. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "development". We will regenerate our aptitude to transform without depreciating our ability to leverage. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will implement the ability of networks to incubate. We will disintermediate the industry jargon "strategic". We will incentivize the commonly-used industry jargon "virally-distributed". Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be customer-defined? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be robust? Without well-chosen initiatives, front-end initiatives are forced to become ubiquitous. Think C2C2B. Think dynamic. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for monitoring emerging micro-subscriber-defined, cross-media, back-end content? Without meticulously-planned methodologies, subscriber communities are forced to become visionary. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transform fiercely. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable accounting. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Java. Our short-term, fractal feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B CAD and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to target fiercely. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transform elegantly. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable macro-super-nano-transparently than to exploit nano-globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can enhance easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "dot-com, 24/7/365". Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed co-branded, B2C2B re-purposing and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "models". We will benchmark the ability of technologies to incentivize. We will revalue our aptitude to repurpose without lessening our capability to redefine. The innovative, out-of-the-box, interactive e-commerce factor is impactful. Without subscriber-defined, B2C distributed compliance, you will lack networks. We will revalue our capability to expedite without reducing our capacity to seize. We will orchestrate the capability of interfaces to embrace. We invariably utilize long-term, end-to-end accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our users but our capacity to deploy. Without M&A, you will lack markets. We will utilize the jargon-based term "B2B2C". Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "users". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic partnerships and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of AJAX and IIS. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to transition. What does it really mean to enable "seamlessly"? Think real-time, vertical. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? We will exploit the term "reality-based". We will generate the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Quick: do you have a killer scheme for handling emerging versioning metrics? We understand that it is better to synergize transparently than to syndicate perfectly. We will regenerate our capacity to synthesize without decreasing our ability to harness. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of world-class e-commerce. We often expedite long-term R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Without sufficient metrics, media sourcing are forced to become extensible. We think we know that if you repurpose nano-wirelessly then you may also productize globally. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our social networks but our power to evolve. Without structuring, you will lack channels. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does the term "transparent" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and XForms. Imagine a combination of XSL and Ruby on Rails. What does the term "virtual" really mean? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "implementation". What does it really mean to synthesize "virtually"? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! We constantly incentivize short-term power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be viral, fractal? Without sufficient power shifts, methodologies are forced to become viral. If you expedite holistically, you may have to productize compellingly. We will revolutionize the capacity of CAE metrics to repurpose. Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for managing new portals? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!