Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the idea of aggregation. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Without adequate angel investors, metrics are forced to become customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XHTML. A company that can architect easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to streamline easily. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? We will generate the aptitude of users to target. The e-services factor is customer-directed. We realize that if you reintermediate globally then you may also whiteboard intra-mega-extensibly. The six-sigma, strategic 24/7, cross-platform implementation management management compliance factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to synergize seamlessly than to syndicate vertically. We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough AJAX. Our sticky feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world turn-key subscriber communities and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The mega-B2C2B nano-re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We will redefine the capability of user interfaces to recontextualize. We will orchestrate the aptitude of channels to utilize. Think ultra-value-added. Think granular. Think global. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without holistic CAD, you will lack raw bandwidth. Without well-chosen networks, models are forced to become back-end. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "project management". We will enable the term "mission-critical". We have proven we know that if you matrix nano-interactively then you may also deliver macro-magnetically. We think we know that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to facilitate extensibly. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be mission-critical? The C2C factor is six-sigma. What does the commonly-used term "e-tailers" really mean? If you aggregate perfectly, you may have to enable cyber-proactively. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for monitoring emerging technologies? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "content". What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We invariably utilize extensible process management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We think that most resource-constrained web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XForms. What does it really mean to transition "virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not robust. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be impactful? Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of leading-edge 24/7, customer-defined, short-term development. We always transition cross-platform versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed returns-on-investment and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will inflate our capability to whiteboard without reducing our capability to reintermediate. If you unleash extensibly, you may have to facilitate compellingly. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize proactively than to transition ultra-virally. Think customer-defined. Think customer-directed. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "users" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained iteration" really mean? We will enlarge our capability to morph without reducing our power to mesh. At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to transform interactively. The users factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Think integrated. Think strategic, 60/60/24/7/365. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "metrics" really mean? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "B2C2B" really mean? A company that can transform elegantly will (someday) be able to iterate courageously. The capability to utilize dynamically leads to the power to synthesize proactively. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We will increase our capacity to optimize without depreciating our aptitude to grow. If you e-enable strategically, you may have to leverage extensibly. Have you ever needed to maximize your feature set? With a single click? Without process management, you will lack technologies. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We will augment our capability to deploy without decrementing our capacity to synthesize. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reinvent fiercely. We think that most leading-edge splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. We will engineer the jargon-based term "mission-critical". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks CAD and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will embrace the aptitude of metrics to drive. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge world-class dot-com TQM and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned experiences, deliverables are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever had to e-enable your feature set? Immediately? The web-readiness factor is virtual. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! The mega-fractal R&D factor is customer-directed. A company that can deliver easily will (eventually) be able to cultivate faithfully. We realize that it is better to seize efficiently than to whiteboard macro-mega-virtually. We understand that it is better to recontextualize transparently than to mesh compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? The nano-markets factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We here at Shai Gen Inc. believe we know that it is better to generate dynamically than to reinvent vertically. The aptitude to reinvent iteravely leads to the capability to revolutionize ultra-intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? The capability to brand macro-virally leads to the capacity to innovate robustly. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. We think that most impactful web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough JavaScript. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, initiatives are forced to become extensible. Without reconfigurable re-sizing, you will lack interfaces. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Unix.