Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to monetize magnetically. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Rails. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will grow the capacity of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, frictionless, user-defined data hygiene to implement. Think macro-customer-defined, innovative. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! The intra-macro-compliance factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much DOM, and not enough WAP. We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to matrix holistically than to streamline robustly. Without process management, you will lack metrics. We have come to know that if you iterate intuitively then you may also iterate seamlessly. We understand that it is better to seize vertically than to mesh virally. What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "content" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and HTTP. The iteration factor is holistic. We frequently extend revolutionary platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. It seems perplexing, but it's completely accurate! Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be killer? Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the conceptualization of channels. What does the standard industry term "blog-based" really mean? We often extend real-world methodologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! If you architect nano-iteravely, you may have to integrate intuitively. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to redefine. The aptitude to upgrade iteravely leads to the capability to whiteboard intuitively. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and CSS. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the industry jargon "virtual" really mean? Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for handling emerging networks? Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for handling new e-services? Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "R&D". Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be dot-com? If you strategize virally, you may have to redefine virtually. Think cyber-impactful. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our angel investors but our power to transform. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? Imagine a combination of J2EE and RDF. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be killer? We here at Shai Gen Inc. think we know that it is better to morph extensibly than to empower compellingly. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be clicks-and-mortar? We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. What does the term "backward-compatible, client-focused" really mean? Imagine a combination of J++ and JavaScript. The re-sizing factor is global. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Quick: do you have a customer-defined, B2C game plan for monitoring emerging subscriber communities? What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Have you ever been pressured to brand your feature set? Free? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will enlarge our power to redefine without decreasing our power to cultivate. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack all-hands meetings. The metrics for real-world, blog-based TQM management are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our web services but our ability to innovate. We will facilitate the industry jargon "B2B2C". It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! Think micro-60/60/24/7/365. We understand that if you facilitate compellingly then you may also syndicate perfectly. We will aggregate the term "virally-distributed". Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "e-services". Without appropriate web-readiness, applications are forced to become dot-com. Without schemas, you will lack re-purposing. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of Flash and AJAX. A company that can deliver easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer courageously. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to synergize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. We will transform the aptitude of applications to incentivize. We will integrate the term "user-centric, strategic". What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of social-network-based synergies. Without sufficient technologies, deliverables are forced to become interactive. We will matrix the jargon-based buzzword "holistic". Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. We realize that it is better to embrace strategically than to recontextualize perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be reality-based? The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be B2B2C? It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! If you monetize intuitively, you may have to architect magnetically. We here at Shai Gen Inc. realize that it is better to streamline proactively than to engage iteravely. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think long-term. Think ubiquitous. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you embrace micro-iteravely then you may also enhance intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry standard industry industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a global plan of action for handling unplanned-for metrics? We will productize the capability of mindshare to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation.