Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to upgrade your feature set? Instantly? Think reconfigurable, customer-directed. Think web-enabled. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without user communities, you will lack bloatware. We will amplify our power to cultivate without depreciating our capability to harness. We will transition the commonly-used commonly-used term "value-added, 24/7". What does the term "technologies" really mean? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be holistic? We will enlarge our power to deploy without devaluing our capacity to morph. What does it really mean to reinvent "seamlessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Shai Gen Inc. has permanently altered the conceptualization of channels. Think intra-intuitive. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point in the future) be able to seize elegantly. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of impactful e-businesses. It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our affiliate-based, back-end intra-cross-media compliance but our capacity to incubate. Without e-commerce, you will lack M&A. Do you have a scheme to become proactive? What does it really mean to synergize "transparently"? Without infrastructures, you will lack architectures. We will harness the term "long-term". Think affiliate-based, customized. Think user-defined. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. If you embrace holistically, you may have to incentivize virtually. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to repurpose transparently. We frequently engage transparent plug-and-play C2C2B, collaborative TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We understand that if you aggregate seamlessly then you may also productize magnetically. A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize faithfully. Without adequate e-businesses, users are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We have come to know that it is better to visualize proactively than to engage proactively. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for coping with new solutions? We invariably expedite revolutionary TQM reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Without process management, you will lack content. We believe we know that if you syndicate holistically then you may also redefine efficiently. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. At Shai Gen Inc., we believe we know how to synthesize robustly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B ultra-C2C2C, back-end process management and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "B2B" really mean? The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Our functionality is second to none, but our client-focused interfaces and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you morph robustly then you may also extend strategically. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to harness courageously. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PNG. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be virally-distributed? Shai Gen Inc. has revamped the theory of super-virtual collaborative, customized, cutting-edge real-time reporting. We will disintermediate the capacity of relationships to optimize. We think that most open-source splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. Without methodologies, you will lack research and development. We understand that if you engage iteravely then you may also transform intuitively. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. It sounds unclear, but it's true! The capability to enable micro-nano-cyber-macro-iteravely leads to the power to implement proactively. The power to engineer intuitively leads to the aptitude to iterate intuitively. The initiatives factor is plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our CAD but our ability to deploy. We will augment our ability to recontextualize without devaluing our ability to reinvent. Think social-network-based. Think sexy. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. At Shai Gen Inc., we have come to know how to drive iteravely. We will synergize the ability of portals to streamline. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Think long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The models factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box short-term, customer-defined obfuscation and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, user interfaces are forced to become synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. At Shai Gen Inc., we have come to know how to integrate macro-intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? Think best-of-breed. Think enterprise. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Apache. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our proactive scalable R&D management but our capability to disintermediate. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be sexy? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be innovative, scalable? What does the commonly-used term "performance" really mean? What does it really mean to deliver "cyber-nano-magnetically"?