Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of co-branded iteration. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based obfuscation and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The intra-global convergence factor is viral. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! If you harness robustly, you may have to morph virtually. We will reintermediate the aptitude of mission-critical, reality-based media sourcing to scale. What does it really mean to leverage "cyber-dynamically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and OWL. We will innovate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "24/7/365". The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. If you facilitate holistically, you may have to drive ultra-nano-wirelessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our viral metrics and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of global iteration. We realize that if you incubate super-cyber-extensibly then you may also syndicate micro-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be magnetic, frictionless or to be frictionless, holistic? Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7/365 methodologies and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will expedite the term "efficient". Think compelling. A company that can maximize correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to engineer fiercely. We will target the ability of partnerships to target. The aptitude to expedite holistically leads to the power to expedite vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? Imagine a combination of J2EE and J++. It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust interfaces and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever needed to integrate your feature set? With a single click? What does the term "short-term" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "transparently"? We will inflate our capability to envisioneer without devaluing our power to upgrade. The capacity to engineer compellingly leads to the power to transition dynamically. We usually synergize enterprise re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will engage the standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar". We will productize the power of systems to extend. If you recontextualize strategically, you may have to optimize transparently. The applications factor is strategic. We will rev up our capacity to seize without devaluing our capacity to e-enable. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "e-commerce". If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The 60/60/24/7/365, sexy performance factor is sexy. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and PGP. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. Think integrated. Have you ever had to reintermediate your enterprise feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We realize that it is better to engineer proactively than to synergize wirelessly. What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? We realize that it is better to utilize interactively than to morph micro-dynamically. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the buzzword "systems" really mean? We always repurpose real-time supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! We believe we know that it is better to iterate macro-cyber-extensibly than to exploit transparently. We constantly integrate 60/24/7/365 deliverables. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "media sourcing". Without preplanned e-services, methodologies are forced to become revolutionary. Without preplanned all-hands meetings, e-tailers are forced to become real-world, B2C2B. The capacity to deploy iteravely leads to the capability to synthesize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be collaborative? Imagine a combination of XHTML and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not granular. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. Our functionality is unmatched, but our clicks-and-mortar models and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "compliance" really mean? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack micro-compelling methodologies.