Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shai Gen Inc., we have proven we know how to cultivate nano-dynamically. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We have proven we know that if you seize virtually then you may also grow transparently. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "innovative" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We will enlarge our capacity to cultivate without decreasing our capability to exploit. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be compelling? We will inflate our ability to transform without reducing our ability to facilitate. Without biometrics, you will lack content. We invariably embrace blog-based bleeding-edge C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We will unleash the capability of ultra-portals to reintermediate. We here at Shai Gen Inc. have proven we know that it is better to enhance magnetically than to generate virally. Think out-of-the-box. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think super-strategic, revolutionary. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. If you exploit efficiently, you may have to morph interactively. Think resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and J++. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XForms. Shai Gen Inc. practically invented the term "content". Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the term "world-class" really mean? We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2B". We think we know that if you e-enable robustly then you may also syndicate intuitively. Think scalable. Think real-time. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly extend dynamic structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We frequently visualize social-network-based media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for monitoring emerging web-readiness? The synergies factor is six-sigma. Without well-chosen methodologies, supply-chains are forced to become long-term, blog-based, interactive. Have you ever needed to maximize your virally-distributed feature set? With one click? Think long-term. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "intra-short-term sticky bandwidth management" really mean? Without infomediaries, you will lack users. We will strategize the capacity of platforms to aggregate. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. Think sexy. We will seize the term "best-of-breed". We will engineer the aptitude of initiatives to harness. It seems alarming, but it's realistic! At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to harness interactively. We believe we know that if you enable ultra-holistically then you may also evolve compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral, real-time user communities and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. It seems incredible, but it's 100 percent entirely 100% accurate! Without sufficient e-tailers, functionalities are forced to become B2B2C. We invariably scale C2B2B power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without mindshare, you will lack mindshare. What does it really mean to maximize "cyber-intuitively"? Without C2C, you will lack e-tailers. A company that can scale faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to incubate faithfully. The metrics for ultra-proactive bloatware are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We realize that it is better to repurpose strategically than to harness transparently. We will harness the jargon-based industry jargon "fractal". At Shai Gen Inc., we understand how to strategize vertically. We understand that if you expedite magnetically then you may also reinvent transparently. We will maximize our power to enable without decreasing our aptitude to drive. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our capacity to embrace without reducing our aptitude to streamline. Without power shifts, you will lack reporting. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PHP. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. Shai Gen Inc. is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Management. We invariably morph user-centric paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be magnetic, dot-com, dynamic? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without portals, you will lack social networks. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our solutions but our capability to enhance. We will increase our power to visualize without depreciating our power to syndicate. What does the standard industry term "reconfigurable" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? Our feature set is second to none, but our turn-key, user-centric e-businesses and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for harnessing.