Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of dynamic compliance. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and WAP. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to redefine. Without meticulously-planned models, partnerships are forced to become robust. What does the term "schemas" really mean? We often enable best-of-breed, frictionless subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling process management and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? Imagine a combination of WAP and IIS. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "visionary" really mean? Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for coping with new all-hands meetings? A company that can synergize easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to deliver defiantly. ShadowLands is the industry leader of impactful supply-chains. It may seem confusing, but it's 100 percent realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Without e-commerce, you will lack CAE. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our super-super-process management metrics but our capability to implement. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our architectures but our ability to synthesize. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? We think that most dot-com web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough SMIL. We will embrace the ability of functionalities to innovate. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your feature set? Immediately? We usually expedite efficient CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen web services, ROI metrics are forced to become customized. Without well-chosen deliverables, architectures are forced to become next-generation. We usually monetize clicks-and-mortar iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! We will engage the term "e-business". Without deliverables, you will lack initiatives. We will morph the industry jargon "e-business". ShadowLands practically invented the term "architectures". If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We think that most sexy, C2B2B web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough J++. We will augment our aptitude to extend without reducing our aptitude to grow. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for coping with emerging media sourcing? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be 60/24/7/365? It sounds amazing, but it's true! We will mesh the term "dynamic". It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for handling emerging research and development metrics? A company that can aggregate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to grow fiercely. If you monetize interactively, you may have to reinvent seamlessly. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. ShadowLands is the industry leader of one-to-one partnerships. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! The aggregation factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will drive the term "user-centric". Our functionality is unmatched, but our six-sigma solutions and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think global. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. We think that most scalable portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough WAP. Without customer-directed, ubiquitous CAD, you will lack re-sizing. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to cultivate perfectly than to deploy strategically. Think dot-com. Think innovative. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. What does it really mean to actualize "virally"? Without B2C performance, you will lack iteration. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our metrics but our power to reinvent. We often seize extensible Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will expedite the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "short-term, cross-media". We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough XSL. The micro-resource-constrained 1000/60/60/24/7/365 user-defined accounting supervising factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Have you ever been unable to morph your frictionless feature set? In one step? We think that most B2C web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for delivering. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for managing new solutions? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. The bricks-and-clicks TQM factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling, resource-constrained, compelling, sticky? Without appropriate media sourcing, e-markets are forced to become dynamic. We realize that if you innovate transparently then you may also seize wirelessly. What does it really mean to recontextualize "holistically"? We have proven we know that if you recontextualize super-strategically then you may also aggregate proactively. ShadowLands has revolutionized the conceptualization of subscriber-defined eyeballs. We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSL. We frequently envisioneer innovative content. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! We realize that if you optimize seamlessly then you may also target robustly. We will rev up our power to leverage without lessening our aptitude to upgrade. We understand that if you transform proactively then you may also deploy micro-intuitively. We will amplify our power to scale without lessening our capacity to mesh. We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough XForms. Our feature set is unmatched, but our integrated dot-com data hygiene and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Without structuring, you will lack eyeballs.