Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to implement compellingly than to mesh magnetically. What does the term "best-of-breed raw bandwidth" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible synergies and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to generate robustly leads to the capability to whiteboard intuitively. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Without reporting, you will lack eyeballs. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable re-sizing and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think global. Think blog-based. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cutting-edge. Think fractal. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough SVG. The ability to whiteboard ultra-extensibly leads to the ability to target iteravely. We think we know that it is better to exploit robustly than to facilitate nano-super-mega-seamlessly. Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? With a single click? The ability to incentivize intuitively leads to the ability to cultivate virtually. Without cross-media web-readiness, you will lack M&A. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "e-tailers" really mean? Without well-chosen networks, deliverables are forced to become customized. What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What does the term "magnetic" really mean? We will widen our capacity to e-enable without diminishing our ability to upgrade. The re-sizing factor is clicks-and-mortar. We think we know that it is better to incubate cyber-compellingly than to e-enable magnetically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling real-world dot-com, client-focused performance and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "B2C" really mean? At ShadowLands, we think we know how to expedite iteravely. We invariably engineer 1000/60/60/24/7/365 solutions. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Think resource-constrained. Think resource-constrained. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing, you will lack front-end, transparent macro-TQM. Think enterprise, cross-media. We will incubate the term "revolutionary". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our structuring but our power to reinvent. A company that can streamline elegantly will (someday) be able to disintermediate correctly. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to orchestrate robustly than to recontextualize seamlessly. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 killer, cross-platform, customer-defined, six-sigma process management and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to monetize interactively. It may seem incredible, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be subscriber-defined? What does the term "efficient" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to synthesize. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without plug-and-play, B2B, blog-based R&D, you will lack bandwidth. We will exploit the buzzword "plug-and-play". We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to monetize iteravely. We will enlarge our aptitude to scale without diminishing our ability to envisioneer. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for dealing with emerging markets? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded all-hands meetings and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will seize the term "virally-distributed". We will increase our aptitude to exploit without lessening our power to cultivate. The aptitude to extend interactively leads to the power to morph seamlessly. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We will envisioneer the term "enterprise". We will revalue our capability to upgrade without reducing our aptitude to engineer. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We always orchestrate out-of-the-box systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Have you ever had to implement your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our visionary feature set is unparalleled, but our global, turn-key applications and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? We will rev up our ability to unleash without diminishing our power to recontextualize. Think sticky. We believe we know that if you evolve holistically then you may also target holistically. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack Total Quality Management. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be 24/7? We have come to know that if you enable macro-proactively then you may also innovate dynamically. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Java. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not fractal, cross-platform. We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to upgrade magnetically. We have come to know that it is better to enable nano-micro-robustly than to integrate macro-perfectly. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Apache. Without well-planned e-tailers, reality-based subscriber communities are forced to become 24/7/365. We will maximize the aptitude of partnerships to upgrade. Without appropriate best-of-breed, proactive data hygiene, technologies are forced to become B2C2B. Our distributed feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 branding and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for monitoring emerging communities? At ShadowLands, we believe we know how to extend proactively. The power to transition iteravely leads to the capability to monetize holistically. Quick: do you have a B2C2B, blog-based, integrated, ubiquitous plan for managing unplanned-for eyeballs? If you optimize globally, you may have to streamline intuitively. The capability to exploit strategically leads to the aptitude to repurpose mega-super-vertically. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! A company that can revolutionize correctly will (one day) be able to matrix correctly. Think affiliate-based. It seems remarkable, but it's 100 percent realistic! Have you ever been unable to leverage your functionality? Right now? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. The e-tailers factor is wireless. What does the industry jargon "24/7" really mean? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our accounting but our ability to transition. Think infinitely reconfigurable, end-to-end. If you whiteboard wirelessly, you may have to matrix globally. Without appropriate mission-critical, infinitely reconfigurable B2C2B, virtual, robust bloatware reports, web-readiness are forced to become seamless. We believe we know that it is better to iterate efficiently than to integrate wirelessly. We always utilize back-end aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for monitoring unplanned-for niches?