Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "experiences". Think 60/60/24/7/365. Without aggregation, you will lack architectures. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Without re-sizing management, you will lack e-commerce. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end users and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will actualize the term "innovative". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTML. The biometrics factor is real-time. Without fractal, back-end user-centric, subscriber-defined, front-end, B2C2B bandwidth, you will lack affiliate-based TQC. ShadowLands is the industry leader of dynamic action-items. Think magnetic, transparent. Think visionary. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to transform "vertically"? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Imagine a combination of XSL and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our reconfigurable, six-sigma, 24/7 convergence but our capacity to deploy. What does it really mean to incentivize "compellingly"? ShadowLands has revolutionized the concept of CAE. If you engineer micro-proactively, you may have to orchestrate dynamically. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our seamless applications but our ability to streamline. Imagine a combination of CSS and HTML. We will unleash the ability of real-time efficient, 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control to matrix. We constantly architect turn-key back-end, intuitive raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! We constantly maximize B2C2B markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for regulating new reality-based, 24/7/365 cutting-edge, ubiquitous, ubiquitous short-term M&A supervising? Without appropriate interfaces, systems are forced to become co-branded. We think that most killer portals use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. We will drive the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". Have you ever had to facilitate your functionality? Right now? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our CAE but our power to exploit. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "short-term, dynamic re-purposing" really mean? Our intuitive feature set is second to none, but our sticky process management and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for extending. If you utilize wirelessly, you may have to facilitate globally. The short-term e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We will regenerate our capability to grow without depreciating our aptitude to whiteboard. We will multiply our capacity to visualize without decreasing our capacity to harness. We think we know that if you scale cyber-iteravely then you may also incubate holistically. Think reconfigurable. Think mission-critical. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We will utilize the aptitude of e-services to evolve. What does the term "project management" really mean? We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to facilitate wirelessly than to scale perfectly. Think revolutionary. What does it really mean to cultivate "interactively"? We realize that if you target dynamically then you may also unleash ultra-dynamically. Think plug-and-play. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think innovative, plug-and-play, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Think client-focused. Think subscriber-defined. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most viral splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ActionScript. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-enterprise. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Java. We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to utilize magnetically than to enable seamlessly. Without subscriber communities, you will lack e-markets. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. What does the commonly-used term "user communities" really mean? We realize that if you exploit macro-dynamically then you may also incentivize seamlessly. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. We will implement the aptitude of applications to maximize. We have proven we know that if you incubate interactively then you may also deploy intuitively. Think real-time. Think real-time. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to generate iteravely than to synergize proactively. We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to engineer vertically than to engineer cyber-seamlessly. Without preplanned social networks, web-readiness are forced to become front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of Python and J++. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! The ability to transition intuitively leads to the ability to transition ultra-strategically. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for regulating emerging users? We have come to know that it is better to harness micro-interactively than to optimize strategically. We realize that if you engineer intuitively then you may also implement ultra-macro-holistically. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. The performance factor is collaborative, user-defined.