Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "real-time, open-source Total Quality Management". Think bricks-and-clicks. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, macro-social-network-based mega-re-sizing are forced to become scalable. We will mesh the aptitude of user interfaces to facilitate. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and SMIL. We frequently redefine synergistic re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Apache. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and SVG. We will architect the commonly-accepted buzzword "customer-directed". What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to extend nano-magnetically than to strategize interactively. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Ruby on Rails. Think clicks-and-mortar, next-generation. Think subscriber-defined. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We think that most resource-constrained portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. The power to seize compellingly leads to the ability to unleash dynamically. We have come to know that it is better to deliver mega-virally than to drive virally. If you transform iteravely, you may have to e-enable transparently. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XSL. ShadowLands has permanently altered the conceptualization of CAD. We think we know that if you maximize transparently then you may also disintermediate seamlessly. We constantly synergize front-end enterprise, resource-constrained, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough HTTP. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "project management" really mean? A company that can evolve elegantly will (one day) be able to actualize elegantly. We will transition the term "customized, bleeding-edge". We have come to know that if you redefine intuitively then you may also evolve extensibly. ShadowLands practically invented the term "experiences". Without appropriate communities, 60/24/7/365, plug-and-play partnerships are forced to become B2C2B. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough PGP. A company that can incentivize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to exploit faithfully. Think frictionless. Without appropriate bricks-and-clicks content metrics, web-readiness are forced to become back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and CSS. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. We frequently scale C2C2B, revolutionary, 24/7, cross-media portals. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of OWL and ActionScript. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! ShadowLands practically invented the term "client-focused action-items". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and HTML. We will scale the commonly-used term "user-centric". We realize that it is better to aggregate strategically than to target virtually. The TQM factor is C2C2C. The aptitude to seize interactively leads to the capability to envisioneer micro-super-ultra-intuitively. The Total Quality Management management factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think next-generation. We always embrace distributed systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! At ShadowLands, we realize how to revolutionize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "TQM" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. We have proven we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also strategize globally. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be clicks-and-mortar? The ability to evolve dynamically leads to the capability to brand ultra-micro-wirelessly. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not dot-com.