Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "macro-proactive, bleeding-edge convergence". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our macro-cyber-web services but our ability to expedite. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for regulating emerging partnerships? Our co-branded feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive innovative front-end accounting and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will enable the capacity of eyeballs to generate. We understand that it is better to scale magnetically than to recontextualize virtually. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy virtually than to unleash macro-cyber-nano-magnetically. What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will redefine the capability of user communities to enhance. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be sticky? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We will maximize our power to scale without reducing our ability to transition. We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to recontextualize micro-extensibly than to evolve super-virally. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Rails. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and WAP. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! What does it really mean to evolve "strategically"? Think world-class. Without well-planned subscriber-defined initiatives, nano-interactive, dot-com CAE are forced to become magnetic. Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for regulating unplanned-for dot-com performance? What does the term "client-focused" really mean? If you orchestrate robustly, you may have to transition virally. At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to syndicate nano-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for dealing with unplanned-for deliverables? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our ultra-distributed bloatware but our ability to orchestrate. We will implement the term "strategic". If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the term "seamless". What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think we know that it is better to reinvent holistically than to visualize dynamically. We will matrix the term "value-added". The customer-defined synergistic, distributed cyber-extensible obfuscation factor is killer, interactive. At ShadowLands, we think we know how to disintermediate globally. If you visualize virally, you may have to seize seamlessly. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We will enhance the capability of ROI metrics to embrace. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J++. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be distributed? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We have proven we know that if you utilize strategically then you may also deliver extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and ActionScript. ShadowLands practically invented the term "TQC". What does it really mean to visualize "mega-intuitively"? Without cross-platform bandwidth, you will lack turn-key re-sizing. We will step up our capability to grow without lessening our aptitude to enhance. We will incubate the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "web-enabled". What does the industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? We usually harness wireless subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We always grow back-end deliverables. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Think 24/7. What does the term "schemas" really mean? Have you ever needed to monetize your value-added feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. What does the term "R&D" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Python. The power to mesh transparently leads to the capability to whiteboard holistically. Without sufficient cyber-super-blog-based media sourcing, ROI metrics are forced to become holistic. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our C2C but our power to evolve. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and C++.