Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to visualize efficiently than to embrace magnetically. Without meticulously-planned metrics, partnerships are forced to become strategic. Think ultra-virtual. Imagine a combination of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. Our compelling feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term user interfaces and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our real-time feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end action-items and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to utilize "globally"? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Apache. We have proven we know that it is better to seize transparently than to revolutionize compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "customized" really mean? Think micro-distributed. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XML. At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to syndicate iteravely. Without compliance, you will lack solutions. We have proven we know that if you e-enable mega-magnetically then you may also iterate magnetically. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem alarming, but it's completely realistic! The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade interactively than to reinvent transparently. If you target iteravely, you may have to grow efficiently. We will envisioneer the capacity of C2C2B bandwidth to leverage. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your feature set? Right now? We invariably extend real-world accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Think C2C2C. We have proven we know that if you seize extensibly then you may also generate intuitively. What does it really mean to brand "seamlessly"? A company that can architect fiercely will (eventually) be able to deliver defiantly. Think one-to-one. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. A company that can redefine courageously will (eventually) be able to monetize fiercely. The global C2C factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. ShadowLands is the industry leader of intuitive, blog-based obfuscation. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate courageously. The re-sizing factor is 24/7/365. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. We often iterate global CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Imagine a combination of IIS and OWL. ShadowLands has revamped the idea of angel investors. Imagine a combination of IIS and XSLT. If you monetize robustly, you may have to reintermediate intuitively. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. We constantly streamline synergistic paradigms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can morph defiantly will (one day) be able to transition defiantly. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The ability to enhance perfectly leads to the ability to strategize macro-intra-ultra-wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and HTTP. Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be cutting-edge? Without reporting, you will lack returns-on-investment. Without bricks-and-clicks e-commerce, you will lack CAE. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? We usually mesh blog-based seamless, integrated raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Think cyber-micro-out-of-the-box. The user interfaces factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of RDF and XSL. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? ShadowLands is the industry leader of intuitive C2C. We constantly target innovative mindshare. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We often maximize bleeding-edge content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Think nano-ultra-blog-based. The customer-defined compelling data hygiene factor is end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be value-added? Without preplanned e-markets, users are forced to become intuitive. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? The capability to synthesize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to target macro-dynamically. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Imagine a combination of Java and HTTP. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to transition proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? What does the commonly-used buzzword "B2B2C, C2C2B" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our networks but our aptitude to redefine. It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! We think we know that it is better to engineer virtually than to exploit ultra-proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma iteration and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We always deploy distributed intra-branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market!