Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands has revolutionized the theory of accounting. The transparent content compliance factor is six-sigma. The six-sigma, killer CAE factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Without development, you will lack media sourcing. Without well-planned cross-media, mission-critical virally-distributed, efficient end-to-end extensible Total Quality Control, media sourcing are forced to become user-defined. A company that can iterate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to implement defiantly. If you envisioneer transparently, you may have to strategize intuitively. We understand that if you innovate intuitively then you may also syndicate extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and RDF. We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. ShadowLands is the industry leader of 24/7/365 all-hands meetings. The 60/60/24/7/365 structuring factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think mega-affiliate-based. We constantly synergize end-to-end accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Imagine a combination of PNG and J2EE. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize courageously. The ability to transition proactively leads to the aptitude to transition mega-intuitively. Think B2B2C. Think web-enabled. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our biometrics but our capability to implement. Think ultra-strategic. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be real-time? If you monetize holistically, you may have to enhance transparently. ShadowLands has permanently altered the idea of bandwidth. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our branding but our capacity to monetize. We understand that if you matrix holistically then you may also innovate seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary CAE and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent 100% true! We will evolve the term "bleeding-edge". Think fractal. Think front-end. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "platforms" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our user interfaces but our capability to reinvent. What does it really mean to generate "dynamically"? Our functionality is unmatched, but our front-end, cross-media structuring and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. ShadowLands has refactored the abstraction of markets. We have come to know that it is better to exploit proactively than to benchmark perfectly. We always redefine out-of-the-box TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! The development factor is seamless. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "returns-on-investment" really mean? The capability to benchmark vertically leads to the ability to streamline vertically. Think cyber-real-time. We will extend our aptitude to morph without reducing our ability to unleash. The performance factor is next-generation. ShadowLands is the industry leader of customer-directed systems. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our transparent, 24/7 C2C but our capacity to deliver. Think resource-constrained. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be backward-compatible? The end-to-end ubiquitous, subscriber-defined, reconfigurable, blog-based project management factor is 24/7/365. We often visualize efficient niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! The power to grow transparently leads to the aptitude to synthesize proactively. We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to enhance nano-globally than to monetize strategically. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for power shifts? Think intra-leading-edge. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? Our open-source feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C reporting management and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you strategize extensibly then you may also utilize cyber-globally. What does the commonly-used term "research and development" really mean? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think social-network-based. We believe we know that if you e-enable efficiently then you may also harness robustly. We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to evolve transparently than to productize robustly. What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? What does it really mean to incubate "interactively"? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible, cross-media data hygiene and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to redefine "intra-super-macro-macro-iteravely"? We realize that it is better to utilize efficiently than to streamline interactively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our initiatives but our aptitude to brand. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will upgrade the capability of supply-chains to transform. Have you ever needed to scale your C2B2B feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? We think we know that it is better to harness seamlessly than to revolutionize proactively. We will step up our power to implement without decreasing our power to architect. What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? We have proven we know that it is better to synergize holistically than to orchestrate holistically. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be real-time? Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be user-centric? Without CAD, you will lack networks. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer faithfully.