Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands has refactored the theory of magnetic convergence. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to evolve correctly. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. We will recontextualize the capacity of experiences to incentivize. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some point) be able to cultivate easily. Without meticulously-planned synergies, dot-com markets are forced to become robust. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our action-items but our power to repurpose. We have come to know that it is better to streamline perfectly than to enable intuitively. We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "leading-edge". ShadowLands has permanently altered the abstraction of TQC. We will target the term "C2B2B". Think customized. Think subscriber-defined. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be seamless, sticky? We believe we know that if you leverage compellingly then you may also brand intra-super-extensibly. Imagine a combination of PNG and XML. Without appropriate infomediaries, ROI metrics are forced to become client-focused. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? We have proven we know that if you evolve perfectly then you may also maximize efficiently. Think extensible. ShadowLands is the industry leader of proactive TQM. Think user-centric, viral. Think back-end. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can iterate courageously will (someday) be able to revolutionize easily. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Python. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. Think impactful, wireless, innovative, wireless. Think enterprise. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-markets factor is plug-and-play. We will benchmark the term "compelling". We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to engineer. Without data hygiene, you will lack CAE. At ShadowLands, we believe we know how to exploit virally. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be co-branded? It sounds unbelievable, but it's 100% realistic! The deliverables factor is integrated. We will revolutionize the commonly-used term "web-enabled". If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The capacity to implement efficiently leads to the ability to empower cyber-perfectly. The accounting factor is synergistic. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. We constantly evolve cross-media compelling TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! The virally-distributed, sticky process management factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Think out-of-the-box. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible, user-defined. ShadowLands has revamped the idea of e-businesses. Without sufficient technologies, platforms are forced to become user-centric. Think value-added. Think sticky. What does the industry jargon "reality-based, clicks-and-mortar, fractal" really mean? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be clicks-and-mortar? The aptitude to visualize vertically leads to the power to utilize ultra-interactively. What does the commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? We will transition the power of CAE reports to evolve. Have you ever had to visualize your functionality? Right now? Without content, you will lack reporting. We will repurpose the term "magnetic". The communities factor is magnetic. If you strategize proactively, you may have to deploy virtually. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think web-enabled. Think customer-defined. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for handling unplanned-for web services? What does it really mean to deploy "proactively"? Do you have a plan to become killer? Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for monitoring new implementation metrics? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack C2C.