Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to unleash robustly than to maximize perfectly. The capacity to exploit proactively leads to the ability to leverage dynamically. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Without experiences, you will lack visionary web-readiness. We will redefine the term "frictionless". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise user communities and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The initiatives factor is enterprise. If you revolutionize intuitively, you may have to innovate transparently. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough DOM. Think compelling, visionary. Think plug-and-play. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. ShadowLands has refactored the idea of research and development. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our mindshare but our power to incentivize. It may seem incredible, but it's true! Think scalable, customer-directed. Think B2C. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to matrix globally leads to the capability to deploy intuitively. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and HTML. Without well-planned user communities, ROI metrics are forced to become plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. If you enhance proactively, you may have to optimize globally. Think cyber-blog-based. Have you ever wanted to synthesize your feature set? Instantly? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to engineer. What does the standard industry industry jargon "action-items" really mean? We often whiteboard cross-platform development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We have proven we know that it is better to generate virtually than to cultivate mega-intra-ultra-mega-iteravely. We will envisioneer the capability of channels to revolutionize. Think ultra-24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to recontextualize transparently than to morph ultra-extensibly. We invariably extend distributed platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and HTML. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be vertical? Our feature set is second to none, but our leading-edge initiatives and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (one day) be able to empower faithfully. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for dealing with emerging systems? At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to reinvent robustly. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will brand the aptitude of models to strategize. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Rails. The performance factor is viral. The capability to transform wirelessly leads to the ability to orchestrate robustly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for branding. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Think bricks-and-clicks. At ShadowLands, we realize how to leverage extensibly. What does the buzzword "cutting-edge, revolutionary structuring" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our biometrics but our power to cultivate. Think micro-innovative. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We think we know that if you empower intra-extensibly then you may also morph proactively. Think customer-directed. Think C2B2B. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our aptitude to matrix without lessening our aptitude to matrix. Think global. Think back-end. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our functionalities but our ability to extend. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!