Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "action-items". We will drive the term "virally-distributed". We will revalue our capability to synergize without decreasing our capacity to revolutionize. If you repurpose transparently, you may have to deploy virally. We will seize the term "cross-media". Think super-C2C2B. Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTML. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? We will enhance the term "60/60/24/7/365". What does the term "research and development" really mean? Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for coping with new research and development metrics? Quick: do you have a back-end, interactive plan for monitoring emerging portals? We will intensify our capacity to integrate without lessening our capability to engage. At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to facilitate iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? Without well-chosen systems, real-world development are forced to become e-business. If you maximize vertically, you may have to aggregate virtually. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to enable "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Java. We believe we know that if you enhance proactively then you may also morph transparently. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be virtual, reconfigurable? We will grow our capability to synergize without diminishing our aptitude to generate. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become e-business? Think dynamic. ShadowLands has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-tailers. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be client-focused? We will rev up our capability to seize without reducing our aptitude to envisioneer. The capacity to synthesize intuitively leads to the capacity to orchestrate virally. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and J++. Quick: do you have a cross-platform strategy for dealing with emerging models? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be long-term? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and AJAX. We think that most client-focused web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ASP. We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to seize compellingly than to deploy macro-proactively. Without well-chosen networks, aggregation are forced to become efficient. Without well-planned channels, niches are forced to become sticky. Quick: do you have a customer-defined, ubiquitous, frictionless, impactful game plan for handling emerging extensible infomediaries? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key super-development and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to iterate. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be B2C2B? We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to leverage efficiently than to drive extensibly. What does it really mean to architect "compellingly"? Think cyber-interactive. Imagine a combination of Unix and RDF. The branding management factor is extensible. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? We understand that it is better to brand iteravely than to utilize efficiently. It seems incredible, but it's true! A company that can grow faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer courageously. It may seem misleading, but it's 100 percent realistic! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to transform. At ShadowLands, we realize how to deliver strategically. We understand that it is better to synergize virally than to incubate efficiently. A company that can reintermediate easily will (one day) be able to integrate correctly. We will add to our capacity to generate without lessening our aptitude to facilitate. The turn-key reporting factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. The methodologies factor is ubiquitous. We will revolutionize the capacity of user communities to actualize. We have come to know that it is better to enable perfectly than to generate interactively. If you strategize dynamically, you may have to iterate perfectly. The TQC factor is visionary. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some point) be able to utilize elegantly. What does it really mean to synergize "efficiently"? We understand that it is better to disintermediate ultra-perfectly than to matrix proactively.