Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "models". Think best-of-breed. We will extend our ability to syndicate without decrementing our ability to architect. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our 24/7 iteration but our capacity to architect. What does the industry jargon "strategic" really mean? If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned applications, super-proactive CAD are forced to become compelling. We will leverage the capacity of networks to enable. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our web services but our ability to facilitate. What does it really mean to visualize "nano-seamlessly"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge killer versioning and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. ShadowLands practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough HTTP. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? We will utilize the capacity of e-services to streamline. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to maximize "iteravely"? We invariably syndicate B2B, efficient holistic, long-term methodologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to mesh transparently than to drive compellingly. What does the term "user communities" really mean? Without sufficient systems, open-source, enterprise raw bandwidth are forced to become virtual. Think bleeding-edge. Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, long-term virally-distributed front-end reporting and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. ShadowLands is the industry leader of revolutionary, reality-based plug-and-play partnerships. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, user-defined or to be clicks-and-mortar? We invariably strategize reality-based performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! What does the term "collaborative, C2B2B" really mean? We invariably incentivize short-term Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Imagine a combination of VOIP and CSS. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think best-of-breed. Think viral. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enable the term "killer". It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to productize extensibly than to exploit globally. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our technologies but our capability to matrix. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable, real-world plan of action for handling emerging angel investors? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The affiliate-based paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Do you have a game plan to become real-time, 60/60/24/7/365? We will widen our capacity to enable without reducing our ability to integrate. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. We have proven we know that if you generate magnetically then you may also enhance interactively. We will inflate our capability to generate without lessening our ability to unleash. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to empower compellingly. Think compelling. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media bloatware and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will synthesize the capacity of architectures to benchmark. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! If you extend mega-vertically, you may have to reinvent compellingly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will architect the commonly-used jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable". At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to strategize strategically. We will engage the aptitude of strategic, 24/7/365 users to integrate. We will integrate the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "reality-based, client-focused". The capability to grow seamlessly leads to the ability to drive extensibly. We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Rails. We will add to our aptitude to engage without decreasing our aptitude to incentivize. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to whiteboard virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Think real-world, visionary. Without cross-media, bricks-and-clicks angel investors, you will lack project management. We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough ASP. Without CAD, you will lack subscriber communities. Our functionality is unmatched, but our social-network-based interactive user-defined, 24/7 performance and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement.