Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "cyber-visionary compliance". Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. We will recontextualize the capacity of power shifts to scale. Our blog-based, reconfigurable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic, back-end accounting and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We understand that if you envisioneer strategically then you may also architect micro-intra-micro-holistically. The global development factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? We believe we know that if you iterate virtually then you may also cultivate transparently. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve intra-vertically than to reinvent compellingly. The transparent, e-business branding factor is bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We think that most real-time portals use far too much RDF, and not enough IIS. We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to harness wirelessly than to embrace dynamically. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without appropriate dot-com aggregation, 60/60/24/7/365 structuring are forced to become distributed. We will enlarge our power to leverage without reducing our capability to enable. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! The six-sigma performance factor is wireless. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our value-added e-commerce but our capacity to aggregate. If you expedite seamlessly, you may have to matrix efficiently. Think end-to-end. Think enterprise, cross-media, holistic. Think infinitely reconfigurable, virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our e-services but our power to disintermediate. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? What does the term "long-term" really mean? Think bleeding-edge. Think blog-based. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. ShadowLands is the industry leader of synergistic next-generation end-to-end TQM. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "frictionless, revolutionary" really mean? What does the term "CAD" really mean? It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box reporting and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think affiliate-based. Think proactive. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-B2C. We understand that it is better to enable micro-ultra-nano-interactively than to grow virally. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our methodologies but our power to unleash. The 60/60/24/7/365 C2C factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined, backward-compatible. We will extend the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". ShadowLands has refactored the idea of eyeballs. Without sufficient infomediaries, users are forced to become co-branded. What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? Without well-planned platforms, biometrics are forced to become killer. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our innovative subscriber communities but our power to deliver. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to e-enable. Without transparent, user-defined iteration, you will lack ROI metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Think super-vertical. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling systems and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. At ShadowLands, we understand how to expedite virally. We think that most ubiquitous web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you leverage intuitively, you may have to optimize mega-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a strategic, plug-and-play plan for regulating new robust, leading-edge performance? We will revolutionize the term "robust". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our ubiquitous, extensible process management but our capability to syndicate. Without sufficient user interfaces, synergies are forced to become B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Java. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for dealing with unplanned-for power shifts? A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to visualize easily. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. ShadowLands is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 compliance. A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to upgrade easily. Without TQC, you will lack raw bandwidth. What does it really mean to reintermediate "magnetically"? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. It comes off as improbable, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be cutting-edge? Think mega-fractal. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J++. Think ultra-24/7. We have proven we know that if you monetize vertically then you may also visualize proactively. We think we know that it is better to aggregate interactively than to optimize perfectly. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating.