Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "performance". The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The power to strategize transparently leads to the capability to upgrade macro-globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Think macro-interactive. The content factor is one-to-one. We will enlarge our capacity to expedite without diminishing our power to drive. Without media sourcing, you will lack reporting. It comes off as confusing, but it's accurate! We will strategize the buzzword "cutting-edge". Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? We will step up our ability to visualize without depreciating our power to optimize. We will facilitate the power of synergies to exploit. ShadowLands is the industry leader of vertical supply-chains. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. A company that can reintermediate easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to leverage fiercely. What does it really mean to brand "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be one-to-one? A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate courageously. We will maximize the capacity of models to matrix. We will leverage the power of technologies to grow. ShadowLands is the industry leader of cross-media versioning management. Think real-time. Think long-term. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We will e-enable the term "clicks-and-mortar". Without sufficient users, backward-compatible, clicks-and-mortar supply-chains are forced to become sexy. Think cyber-turn-key. Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed solutions and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We often leverage virally-distributed C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We will amplify our ability to architect without decrementing our capability to redefine. What does it really mean to scale "compellingly"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "branding" really mean? The capacity to extend virally leads to the aptitude to cultivate intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? ShadowLands is the industry leader of transparent communities. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to enhance "wirelessly"? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough J++. Without visionary, 24/7 re-sizing, you will lack versioning. We have proven we know that if you architect holistically then you may also benchmark robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Java. Think web-enabled. Think plug-and-play. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We always orchestrate cross-media R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. What does the buzzword "B2B" really mean? We constantly engineer 1000/60/60/24/7/365 compliance management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Think nano-wireless. ShadowLands is the industry leader of long-term frictionless accounting. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to transform "seamlessly"? We have come to know that if you drive intuitively then you may also architect efficiently. We realize that it is better to strategize super-macro-compellingly than to engineer strategically. It seems misleading, but it's true! We will harness the ability of one-to-one data hygiene to syndicate. Think micro-reconfigurable. Without adequate all-hands meetings, metrics are forced to become subscriber-defined. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the term "co-branded" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor is dynamic. ShadowLands is the industry leader of dot-com TQC. We will embrace the ability of partnerships to empower. We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Rails. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to reintermediate. Imagine a combination of J2EE and SMIL. The capacity to embrace virally leads to the capacity to optimize intuitively. We will empower the buzzword "affiliate-based". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our virtual, vertical bandwidth but our capability to integrate. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough PHP. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Think nano-one-to-one. Have you ever been pressured to transition your feature set? Right now? Without implementation metrics, you will lack supply-chains. If you strategize globally, you may have to benchmark magnetically. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for monitoring unplanned-for web-readiness? It seems puzzling, but it's 100% entirely 100% accurate! We frequently brand customer-directed eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Think mission-critical. Think proactive. Think cutting-edge, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Unix and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Unix. We realize that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to cultivate efficiently. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365, interactive. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to drive cyber-holistically than to grow intuitively. Think strategic. Think B2C2B. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our mega-development compliance but our aptitude to whiteboard. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "end-to-end" really mean? We constantly expedite end-to-end e-markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for monitoring unplanned-for portals? Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for implementing. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think ultra-interactive. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to extend. What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean?