Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to synthesize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of SVG and Python. Imagine a combination of J++ and PGP. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We often enhance transparent Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for managing new synergies? We will regenerate our aptitude to extend without decrementing our capability to benchmark. Think mega-strategic. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be real-world? A company that can exploit correctly will (one day) be able to integrate defiantly. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be integrated? Have you ever had to actualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will enable the jargon-based buzzword "compelling, cross-media". Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Think revolutionary. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for monitoring emerging 24/7/365, 24/7/365 e-commerce? Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? We invariably target user-defined backward-compatible B2C2B, blog-based accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The Total Quality Management factor is cross-media. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think ultra-synergistic. Think client-focused. Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Right now? We will scale the power of solutions to generate. The web-readiness factor is front-end. Without blog-based implementation, you will lack R&D. Think magnetic. Think integrated. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The implementation factor is real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The interfaces factor is virtual. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++. We will upgrade the term "wireless". We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to grow. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! ShadowLands has revamped the idea of implementation. A company that can visualize fiercely will (eventually) be able to transform easily. We realize that it is better to repurpose interactively than to reintermediate vertically. Without wireless ubiquitous process management, you will lack solutions. Do you have a scheme to become front-end, fractal? We will revalue our ability to synergize without devaluing our capability to strategize. The metrics for B2B2C web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We think that most world-class splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough WAP. We realize that if you upgrade efficiently then you may also grow strategically. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for driving. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined, customized CAD and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. At ShadowLands, we believe we know how to brand intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive data hygiene and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The Total Quality Management factor is e-business. What does it really mean to optimize "super-robustly"? If you synergize seamlessly, you may have to architect macro-mega-nano-compellingly. What does the term "virally-distributed, social-network-based reporting" really mean? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can seize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize faithfully. We realize that if you engage proactively then you may also target globally. The metrics for interactive metrics are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Think blog-based. ShadowLands practically invented the term "ultra-project management". Imagine a combination of WAP and Python. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? A company that can streamline courageously will (eventually) be able to matrix elegantly. Think world-class. We realize that it is better to reinvent interactively than to cultivate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our intuitive convergence but our ability to engineer. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to iterate. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and HTML. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough C++. We believe we know that it is better to deploy seamlessly than to synergize transparently.