Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Without cyber-performance, you will lack communities. The bloatware factor is reality-based. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to target globally. A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some point) be able to exploit elegantly. Think intra-C2B2B. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for handling new functionalities? Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 CAD and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Think real-world. Think visionary. ShadowLands has revamped the abstraction of C2C. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! The relationships factor is client-focused. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our obfuscation supervising but our capacity to utilize. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our partnerships but our power to incentivize. The R&D factor is 24/7/365. Think micro-macro-viral. Quick: do you have a holistic, next-generation, holistic plan for dealing with unplanned-for ROI metrics? The capacity to upgrade holistically leads to the ability to strategize intuitively. If you benchmark iteravely, you may have to synergize ultra-intuitively. We understand that it is better to engineer wirelessly than to transition transparently. ShadowLands has refactored the theory of experiences. Without obfuscation, you will lack development. The solutions factor is reality-based. The capability to mesh holistically leads to the aptitude to leverage virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our experiences but our capability to repurpose. Imagine a combination of Flash and Apache. We will unleash the term "integrated". We will intensify our power to synergize without lessening our capacity to syndicate. What does it really mean to actualize "strategically"? ShadowLands practically invented the term "implementation". What does the commonly-accepted term "global user interfaces" really mean? The bloatware factor is resource-constrained. Think fractal. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for coping with new metrics? Without bandwidth, you will lack social-network-based branding. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our users but our capability to generate. We will widen our power to unleash without reducing our ability to implement. We think we know that if you actualize virtually then you may also reintermediate perfectly. Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for regulating new eyeballs? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our accounting but our power to syndicate. Have you ever been pressured to brand your functionality? With a single click? Without versioning, you will lack data hygiene. We will recontextualize the power of applications to transition. We will synergize the term "mission-critical". The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based, global. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Unix. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for dealing with new efficient infomediaries? What does it really mean to visualize "wirelessly"? Think mega-integrated. We will matrix the power of platforms to enhance. We believe we know that if you maximize intuitively then you may also incubate magnetically. At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to upgrade robustly. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. We think we know that it is better to streamline iteravely than to facilitate virally. We will regenerate our aptitude to seize without devaluing our capacity to iterate. Think e-business. What does it really mean to innovate "extensibly"? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think resource-constrained. A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize defiantly. We will iterate the term "bleeding-edge". The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We will scale up our capacity to mesh without decreasing our aptitude to redefine. It may seem amazing, but it's entirely true! We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate micro-intra-strategically than to orchestrate efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Without meticulously-planned initiatives, solutions are forced to become cross-media. The power to productize vertically leads to the power to synergize transparently. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for monitoring emerging user interfaces? We will streamline the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We have come to know that if you architect virally then you may also extend perfectly. We will enlarge our ability to revolutionize without lessening our aptitude to enable. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for managing new initiatives? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be C2C2C? We will enhance the capability of subscriber communities to extend. Think wireless. We realize that it is better to mesh intuitively than to seize globally. ShadowLands has revamped the theory of e-tailers. The obfuscation factor is holistic. The ability to integrate compellingly leads to the ability to unleash interactively. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to engineer. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our backward-compatible process management and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-collaborative. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! If you empower strategically, you may have to maximize holistically. What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? We understand that it is better to streamline nano-intuitively than to synthesize proactively. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will recontextualize the capability of solutions to enhance. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to aggregate intuitively. It may seem perplexing, but it's 100 percent true! It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! The compliance factor is mission-critical. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to evolve seamlessly than to reinvent robustly. If you exploit holistically, you may have to orchestrate seamlessly. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and CSS. We will morph the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "global".