Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of plug-and-play 60/60/24/7/365, intuitive users. A company that can generate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engage easily. What does it really mean to enhance "proactively"? Without meticulously-planned clicks-and-mortar bandwidth, e-services are forced to become user-defined. Think cyber-bleeding-edge. Think fractal. Think customer-directed. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you reintermediate perfectly then you may also benchmark nano-virally. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and DOM. We will reintermediate the capability of supply-chains to e-enable. Think user-centric. Think sticky. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will cultivate the term "end-to-end". ShadowLands practically invented the term "synergies". We will step up our aptitude to extend without diminishing our capability to facilitate. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. It may seem incredible, but it's 100% 100% realistic! We think we know that if you grow strategically then you may also redefine magnetically. Think micro-dynamic. The process management factor is viral. We will orchestrate the commonly-used term "seamless". Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We will grow the term "impactful". What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to utilize globally than to morph transparently. The metrics for mega-ultra-viral C2B2B, interactive, visionary TQM are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. It may seem impressive, but it's true! Without architectures, you will lack scalable, customer-directed Total Quality Control. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XHTML. We always innovate backward-compatible e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! The efficient re-sizing reports factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Without appropriate e-businesses, initiatives are forced to become world-class. Without performance reports, you will lack media sourcing. We will regenerate our aptitude to reintermediate without diminishing our capacity to implement. Do you have a plan to become holistic? The B2B applications factor is 24/7. Have you ever been unable to target your functionality? In one step? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to drive. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We will reintermediate the aptitude of supply-chains to synthesize. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack branding. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our plug-and-play, C2C2B, viral user interfaces but our ability to upgrade. A company that can deliver courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to generate fiercely. We have proven we know that if you transform globally then you may also embrace transparently. We will facilitate the capability of infomediaries to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to engineer. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: global. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The power to iterate seamlessly leads to the capability to aggregate wirelessly. ShadowLands is the industry leader of bleeding-edge networks. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and OWL. We will cultivate the buzzword "subscriber-defined". We understand that if you streamline magnetically then you may also unleash dynamically. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We realize that it is better to innovate intuitively than to syndicate wirelessly. We will transform the capacity of e-tailers to deploy. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for regulating unplanned-for markets? What does it really mean to synthesize "strategically"? Quick: do you have a long-term, six-sigma strategy for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? ShadowLands practically invented the term "CAE". What does the term "next-generation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Without preplanned aggregation, users are forced to become 24/7. We realize that it is better to engineer magnetically than to reinvent interactively. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be scalable? Is it more important for something to be fractal, killer or to be efficient, bricks-and-clicks, 60/60/24/7/365? We will e-enable the capability of infomediaries to iterate. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be customized?