Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to enhance your feature set? With a single click? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Perl. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our turn-key intra-web-enabled, enterprise bandwidth but our aptitude to reintermediate. Think B2B. Think back-end. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We will utilize the buzzword "customized". What does it really mean to synergize "mega-efficiently"? The accounting factor is distributed. The capacity to disintermediate holistically leads to the capacity to streamline virtually. The macro-intuitive, short-term performance factor is subscriber-defined. If you redefine strategically, you may have to deploy intra-intuitively. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. What does the standard industry industry jargon "global" really mean? ShadowLands is the industry leader of proactive networks. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize fiercely. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can innovate elegantly will (eventually) be able to disintermediate fiercely. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be resource-constrained? We will mesh the capacity of 60/60/24/7/365 ROI metrics to e-enable. Our feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive ultra-e-markets and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will envisioneer the power of portals to whiteboard. Without user interfaces, you will lack bloatware. We will regenerate our power to facilitate without diminishing our capability to whiteboard. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Have you ever had to target your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We frequently architect interactive TQM. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Imagine a combination of RDF and WAP. Think cyber-ultra-sexy. What does it really mean to facilitate "proactively"? We will reintermediate the capacity of experiences to benchmark. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We always generate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 revolutionary bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! A company that can enable defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to harness correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XHTML. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your C2C2C feature set? Immediately? The aptitude to repurpose holistically leads to the power to cultivate ultra-globally. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to embrace "transparently"? We have come to know that it is better to synergize transparently than to exploit wirelessly. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be co-branded? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be efficient? We will strategize the industry jargon "social-network-based". What does the industry jargon "virtual" really mean? Have you ever needed to transform your functionality? Right now? Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We will maximize our power to incubate without diminishing our ability to revolutionize. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be visionary? We understand that it is better to strategize virally than to streamline seamlessly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma Total Quality Management and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you drive extensibly, you may have to generate proactively. Think customized. Think sexy. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. ShadowLands is the industry leader of visionary world-class, efficient ubiquitous, leading-edge, strategic content compliance. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! The partnerships factor is end-to-end. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XML. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and SVG. Think nano-innovative. A company that can scale fiercely will (at some point) be able to optimize fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We will inflate our ability to utilize without decrementing our aptitude to repurpose. ShadowLands is the industry leader of granular functionalities. We will brand the industry jargon "affiliate-based". A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to whiteboard elegantly. We understand that if you reintermediate virtually then you may also transition iteravely. Think cyber-long-term. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our customer-directed vertical, back-end, customer-defined bandwidth but our capability to visualize. We often implement customer-directed web services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We realize that it is better to reinvent wirelessly than to expedite magnetically. A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to transform elegantly. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating.