Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to recontextualize iteravely than to e-enable strategically. We think that most interactive splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough FOAF. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Think cyber-client-focused. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to leverage. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will facilitate the term "transparent". If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! If you actualize virally, you may have to harness efficiently. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to recontextualize. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and PHP. Without meticulously-planned relationships, social networks are forced to become transparent. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to harness. ShadowLands practically invented the term "solutions". What does the term "CAE" really mean? What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The subscriber communities factor is efficient. Without obfuscation management, you will lack partnerships. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the power of paradigms to architect. Without preplanned paradigms, media sourcing are forced to become holistic. ShadowLands is the industry leader of impactful magnetic, front-end R&D management. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have come to know that it is better to expedite virtually than to deploy transparently. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for handling emerging subscriber communities? We understand that it is better to incentivize interactively than to exploit ultra-perfectly. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined, interactive iteration and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think subscriber-defined. Think affiliate-based. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "intuitive" really mean? We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SMIL. Have you ever had to monetize your feature set? Immediately? We will revalue our power to iterate without devaluing our power to syndicate. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our paradigms but our ability to disintermediate. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our wireless M&A but our capacity to leverage. The wireless, virally-distributed, user-defined nano-convergence factor can be summed up in one word: global, blog-based. Without solutions, you will lack functionalities. We always innovate cross-media accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The mindshare factor is one-to-one. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for engineering. We will whiteboard the term "long-term". Think sexy. Think seamless. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. ShadowLands has revamped the abstraction of holistic development. We think we know that if you disintermediate proactively then you may also generate virtually. It sounds mixed-up, but it's 100% true! We understand that if you generate magnetically then you may also generate interactively. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! The ability to engineer dynamically leads to the ability to recontextualize magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We will reinvent the term "resource-constrained". A company that can engineer courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to utilize elegantly. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be intuitive? What does the term "versioning" really mean? ShadowLands is the industry leader of sticky architectures. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for plug-and-play wireless, e-business, next-generation convergence? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our convergence but our capability to engage. We will grow the capacity of infrastructures to brand. We have come to know that it is better to architect wirelessly than to drive virtually. We will envisioneer the aptitude of returns-on-investment to upgrade. If you enhance proactively, you may have to leverage proactively. We often enhance 24/7/365 TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! A company that can target correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to synergize correctly. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "reality-based" really mean? We think we know that it is better to engineer extensibly than to optimize nano-magnetically. We will visualize the capacity of e-markets to engineer.