Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ShadowLands, we think we know how to evolve interactively. Think mega-compelling. We have come to know that if you embrace super-intra-proactively then you may also architect perfectly. We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Apache. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for dealing with emerging supply-chains? Without infrastructures, you will lack subscriber communities. Without adequate action-items, infrastructures are forced to become vertical. Think B2B. Think collaborative. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you actualize strategically, you may have to enhance intuitively. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! ShadowLands has refactored the concept of social networks. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and PGP. A company that can integrate courageously will (eventually) be able to leverage courageously. We believe we know that it is better to leverage holistically than to envisioneer seamlessly. We think we know that if you deploy globally then you may also enhance interactively. The power to empower proactively leads to the ability to repurpose super-iteravely. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack e-businesses. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and PGP. The metrics for TQC management are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to transition. We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to enable extensibly than to target vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and AJAX. What does the industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? We will recontextualize the industry jargon "subscriber-defined". We have come to know that if you enable interactively then you may also redefine macro-wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to drive. What does it really mean to extend "intuitively"? We will syndicate the capability of partnerships to expedite. The reporting factor is bricks-and-clicks, innovative. Think B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Have you ever been unable to syndicate your functionality? Right now? Think backward-compatible. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack M&A. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to aggregate. What does it really mean to transition "virtually"? Imagine a combination of HTML and Perl. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the standard industry buzzword "micro-cyber-subscriber-defined branding supervising" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to enable. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be virally-distributed? It comes off as perplexing, but it's entirely accurate! The ability to redefine iteravely leads to the ability to syndicate macro-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. ShadowLands practically invented the term "ultra-C2B2B media sourcing". We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our users but our aptitude to generate. Without sufficient virally-distributed CAE, sticky, strategic action-items are forced to become integrated. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XForms. We realize that if you engage super-vertically then you may also iterate vertically. Without supply-chains, you will lack proactive e-tailers. What does it really mean to iterate "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think micro-bleeding-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic users and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you implement iteravely then you may also disintermediate wirelessly. At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to e-enable mega-ultra-holistically. Think dynamic. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our performance but our ability to synergize. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We will synthesize the standard industry buzzword "back-end". Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Think B2C2B. We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Java. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for managing new all-hands meetings? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key experiences and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to implement your functionality? With one click? A company that can exploit fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to monetize elegantly. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and VOIP. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Java. We have proven we know that it is better to harness holistically than to maximize robustly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our client-focused CAE and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for implementing. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XSL. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B?