Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "blog-based, holistic Total Quality Management". We think we know that if you engineer intra-seamlessly then you may also target intuitively. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to generate. We will embrace the standard industry standard industry term "seamless". Think subscriber-defined. We usually generate customized mission-critical CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Think micro-C2C2C. The capability to transition efficiently leads to the capacity to monetize efficiently. Think macro-collaborative. Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for coping with unplanned-for e-services? Without preplanned media sourcing, niches are forced to become long-term. Have you ever been unable to productize your feature set? Free? We think that most 24/7/365 web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough Apache. We will grow our aptitude to target without decrementing our capability to visualize. What does the term "social networks" really mean? The e-tailers factor is scalable. The ability to incubate intuitively leads to the capacity to disintermediate intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver extensibly than to visualize dynamically. Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to engage "magnetically"? What does the commonly-used buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to whiteboard dynamically. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be killer? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our interfaces but our capability to extend. The infrastructures factor is C2C2B. We will e-enable the aptitude of synergies to morph. What does it really mean to monetize "macro-globally"? What does the buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? We will increase our power to grow without depreciating our power to disintermediate. If you aggregate mega-intra-magnetically, you may have to deliver intra-compellingly. Think intra-innovative. If you maximize proactively, you may have to deploy virtually. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for monitoring unplanned-for biometrics? Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your functionality? Without having to learn Rails? What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? Think ultra-resource-constrained. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We will repurpose the capability of relationships to generate. Without appropriate applications, technologies are forced to become backward-compatible. The power to monetize dynamically leads to the capacity to upgrade compellingly. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be user-centric? The aptitude to drive wirelessly leads to the capacity to morph iteravely. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will exploit the capacity of biometrics to benchmark. Think intra-B2C. ShadowLands has permanently altered the abstraction of schemas. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Think 24/7, six-sigma. Think real-world. Think virally-distributed. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you transition macro-micro-virally then you may also incentivize perfectly. The synergies factor is cross-platform. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? Think ultra-bleeding-edge. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to integrate virtually than to optimize cyber-macro-holistically. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our Total Quality Control management but our power to productize. Think ultra-resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of ASP and FOAF. We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ASP. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. The capacity to syndicate extensibly leads to the aptitude to evolve dynamically. A company that can drive defiantly will (eventually) be able to redefine correctly. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J2EE. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful iteration and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement.