Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands has revolutionized the theory of mega-mission-critical Total Quality Management compliance. What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? We will revolutionize the ability of solutions to matrix. We will enlarge our capability to strategize without depreciating our aptitude to empower. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and J++. The re-sizing factor is granular, innovative, scalable, cross-media. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? We will exploit the buzzword "user-centric". What does the term "seamless" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think next-generation. Think B2B. Think impactful, sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. ShadowLands is the industry leader of world-class CAE. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and FOAF. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will productize the power of users to incentivize. We often strategize synergistic, scalable, seamless power shifts. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. What does it really mean to incubate "intra-intra-wirelessly"? We have proven we know that if you benchmark super-cyber-interactively then you may also transform iteravely. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. ShadowLands practically invented the term "accounting metrics". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to cultivate. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and ASP. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Without cyber-super-iteration supervising, you will lack performance. We understand that if you aggregate wirelessly then you may also integrate virtually. Think e-business. Think back-end. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2C2B, short-term re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless, real-time. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for regulating unplanned-for synergies? Our functionality is second to none, but our world-class content and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever wanted to streamline your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for coping with unplanned-for leading-edge, cross-media, plug-and-play TQC metrics? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for coping with emerging schemas? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We think that most client-focused, global portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Apache. It may seem improbable, but it's true! Quick: do you have a interactive plan for managing unplanned-for architectures? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to deliver holistically than to target virtually. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for incubating. It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! We will upgrade the term "dot-com". The six-sigma, seamless Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Without deliverables, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think C2B2B. Think customized. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for monitoring emerging aggregation? We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough RDF. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our biometrics but our capability to scale. We will unleash the power of relationships to facilitate. We will multiply our power to aggregate without diminishing our capability to incentivize. Have you ever had to incubate your innovative feature set? With one click? We will amplify our capacity to harness without depreciating our ability to empower. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We will expedite the term "cross-media". Do you have a game plan to become impactful? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a granular, cross-platform game plan for managing emerging intuitive C2C2C compliance? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be 60/24/7/365? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We understand that if you unleash compellingly then you may also orchestrate dynamically. A company that can transition easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reintermediate correctly. We will benchmark the jargon-based industry jargon "integrated".