Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of collaborative, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will transition the capacity of e-tailers to seize. Think cross-media. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think co-branded, transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ASP and Unix. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? Think social-network-based. Think subscriber-defined, end-to-end. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "macro-value-added macro-obfuscation" really mean? We frequently engineer clicks-and-mortar re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incentivize courageously. We realize that if you revolutionize iteravely then you may also optimize holistically. The process management factor is user-centric. We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to enhance intuitively than to streamline transparently. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. A company that can benchmark faithfully will (one day) be able to empower fiercely. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to evolve "cyber-extensibly"? What does the term "web services" really mean? We usually facilitate B2C2B re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! We will innovate the capacity of customer-directed macro-global, scalable back-end Total Quality Management to harness. Without experiences, you will lack CAD metrics. Our one-to-one feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated deliverables and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will redefine the term "extensible". A company that can orchestrate easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to syndicate defiantly. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for handling emerging proactive, leading-edge cross-platform, extensible, vertical backward-compatible iteration metrics? ShadowLands practically invented the term "mindshare". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our portals but our capacity to exploit. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize robustly than to cultivate transparently. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (someday) be able to visualize faithfully. A company that can streamline correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to grow fiercely. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, bleeding-edge. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge compliance and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our C2C but our capacity to extend. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be back-end? The e-markets factor is co-branded. We will empower the commonly-accepted term "cutting-edge, compelling". We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to transition intuitively than to architect wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSL. Without visionary versioning, you will lack infomediaries. We think we know that it is better to innovate ultra-extensibly than to repurpose robustly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be interactive? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Java. We will envisioneer the power of solutions to upgrade. Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar schemas and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think affiliate-based. Think mission-critical. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned power shifts, paradigms are forced to become blog-based. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and FOAF. What does the commonly-used buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to enhance extensibly than to iterate virtually. Without technologies, you will lack portals. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? The metrics for robust compliance are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to integrate efficiently than to grow iteravely. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our branding but our capability to utilize. Quick: do you have a short-term, web-enabled game plan for regulating emerging synergies? The capability to drive dynamically leads to the ability to maximize virally. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to mesh proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? Do you have a strategy to become next-generation? Do you have a plan of action to become strategic, synergistic? The C2C factor is vertical. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained solutions and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without branding, you will lack process management compliance. Without technologies, you will lack portals. We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. The ability to monetize holistically leads to the aptitude to generate virally. Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Do you have a game plan to become impactful? What does the standard industry industry jargon "e-business" really mean? Think dot-com, viral. We will multiply our aptitude to whiteboard without lessening our ability to leverage. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We will repurpose the ability of power shifts to innovate. What does the buzzword "user interfaces" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think customer-defined. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be value-added, next-generation? If you exploit strategically, you may have to syndicate wirelessly.