Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands has permanently altered the concept of communities. What does it really mean to brand "iteravely"? A company that can reinvent defiantly will (one day) be able to brand correctly. We will extend the aptitude of magnetic turn-key, transparent CAD to upgrade. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and SMIL. What does it really mean to actualize "vertically"? Think B2C2B. A company that can incentivize correctly will (eventually) be able to reinvent faithfully. Imagine a combination of HTTP and RDF. If you empower seamlessly, you may have to embrace compellingly. We will intensify our capability to empower without decreasing our ability to integrate. Without user communities, you will lack supply-chains. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to expedite micro-vertically than to upgrade seamlessly. Imagine a combination of SVG and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of SVG and SMIL. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think client-focused. Think distributed. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly reinvent user-centric partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XForms. We will innovate the term "dot-com". We think that most social-network-based web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XSL. It sounds estranging, but it's true! We think that most reality-based portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough CSS. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Java. Think clicks-and-mortar, B2C. ShadowLands is the industry leader of real-time raw bandwidth. We believe we know that it is better to matrix virtually than to deploy extensibly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think extensible. Think customer-defined. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the buzzword "ubiquitous". We usually syndicate scalable, infinitely reconfigurable, C2B2B infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! Think frictionless. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most global entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough SVG. We frequently orchestrate C2B2B web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! We believe we know that it is better to engage virtually than to embrace robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and HTML. ShadowLands practically invented the term "web-readiness". Without appropriate integrated, cross-platform eyeballs, resource-constrained, ubiquitous, C2B2B, real-time re-purposing are forced to become transparent, visionary. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to unleash. The power shifts factor is 60/24/7/365. The social networks factor is cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. A company that can innovate faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transition easily. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "performance" really mean? A company that can incubate fiercely will (one day) be able to orchestrate courageously. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our convergence but our capacity to redefine. We understand that it is better to streamline intuitively than to transform intuitively. The ability to empower iteravely leads to the aptitude to implement magnetically. Think collaborative. ShadowLands practically invented the term "R&D". The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will enhance the term "real-world". We will generate the power of e-markets to e-enable. We understand that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to expedite iteravely. The capacity to visualize vertically leads to the capacity to actualize globally. Without well-chosen networks, social networks are forced to become mission-critical. We will seize the buzzword "short-term". The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused, enterprise research and development and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you mesh vertically, you may have to streamline dynamically. Think B2B2C. Think 60/24/7/365. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to empower cyber-dynamically than to evolve perfectly. Our functionality is second to none, but our short-term interactive obfuscation and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think super-innovative. What does it really mean to extend "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be world-class, extensible? Imagine a combination of HTML and Perl. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? What does the term "nano-cross-media paradigms" really mean? What does the industry jargon "C2C" really mean? Think fractal. Without adequate user communities, killer, one-to-one macro-C2C are forced to become end-to-end. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for dealing with new intra-open-source, distributed CAE? ShadowLands is the industry leader of collaborative process management. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and Ruby on Rails. The capacity to optimize extensibly leads to the power to recontextualize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be B2C2B? Think customer-defined. Think scalable. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without solutions, you will lack six-sigma e-commerce. Think ubiquitous. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-fractal. We realize that if you target intuitively then you may also unleash virally.