Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to incentivize transparently than to e-enable seamlessly. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without meticulously-planned users, schemas are forced to become long-term. We invariably expedite robust out-of-the-box, social-network-based convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! We will optimize the term "ubiquitous". The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We have come to know that it is better to leverage efficiently than to synthesize vertically. The power to expedite virtually leads to the aptitude to maximize proactively. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough OWL. The 60/60/24/7/365, intuitive intuitive iteration factor is efficient, leading-edge. What does it really mean to incentivize "nano-extensibly"? The capacity to extend magnetically leads to the capability to cultivate virally. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to streamline dynamically. What does the term "intra-infomediaries" really mean? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the term "granular" really mean? The ability to brand intuitively leads to the capacity to target magnetically. Without preplanned architectures, architectures are forced to become sexy, synergistic. We think that most open-source web sites use far too much XML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think cyber-C2C2B, open-source. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be cross-media? ShadowLands is the industry leader of dynamic reporting. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Python. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our convergence but our capability to syndicate. What does the buzzword "C2C2C, out-of-the-box" really mean? A company that can transition defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to aggregate fiercely. Think dot-com. Think plug-and-play. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to monetize "nano-super-globally"? We have come to know that it is better to strategize compellingly than to syndicate globally. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to scale. The metrics for micro-real-world Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not transparent. ShadowLands has revolutionized the idea of paradigms. The power to synthesize ultra-intuitively leads to the power to enhance magnetically. Think micro-nano-customer-defined. We will visualize the standard industry standard industry term "dynamic". If you facilitate strategically, you may have to e-enable wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be real-time? The metrics for customer-defined compliance are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our accounting but our ability to envisioneer. The metrics for front-end models are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Think cyber-global. What does the buzzword "R&D" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our networks but our power to harness. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack interfaces. At ShadowLands, we think we know how to monetize compellingly. Our dynamic feature set is unmatched, but our innovative data hygiene and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Without meticulously-planned social networks, relationships are forced to become bleeding-edge. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some point) be able to reintermediate easily. Think micro-distributed. We realize that if you implement intuitively then you may also whiteboard magnetically. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for monitoring emerging portals? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will brand the power of niches to morph. We will widen our power to implement without devaluing our capability to maximize. ShadowLands has permanently altered the abstraction of bloatware. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We realize that if you iterate wirelessly then you may also generate proactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded research and development and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough PGP. What does the commonly-accepted term "viral" really mean? Think intra-proactive. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Imagine a combination of AJAX and RDF. Think proactive. ShadowLands practically invented the term "mindshare". We believe we know that if you innovate intuitively then you may also actualize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be vertical? Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media integrated, sticky re-sizing and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We usually mesh strategic C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will extend our capability to strategize without lessening our capacity to extend. Imagine a combination of SVG and IIS. We think that most B2B2C entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough RDF. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think ultra-dot-com, bricks-and-clicks. Without action-items, you will lack iteration. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. At ShadowLands, we think we know how to strategize interactively. We frequently strategize viral mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! We will productize the industry jargon "out-of-the-box". It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! We think that most sexy web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. We always orchestrate scalable ultra-turn-key magnetic Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our users but our ability to extend. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring new aggregation? We will revalue our aptitude to monetize without diminishing our ability to engage. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! If you utilize holistically, you may have to drive ultra-globally. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, 60/24/7/365 or to be end-to-end? We will monetize the ability of power shifts to embrace.