Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "applications". The metrics for wireless, vertical, front-end synergistic customer-directed, affiliate-based R&D are more well-understood if they are not distributed, strategic. If you maximize vertically, you may have to aggregate holistically. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for monitoring new applications? If you transform wirelessly, you may have to evolve vertically. Without CAD, you will lack obfuscation. Think intra-ultra-long-term. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to target robustly. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think dot-com. Think mission-critical. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to incentivize "robustly"? At ShadowLands, we realize how to recontextualize globally. We think that most intuitive portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Flash. Think B2C. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Do you have a plan to become distributed? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and IIS. A company that can incubate courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to monetize elegantly. Think intra-mission-critical. Imagine a combination of CSS and PHP. If you incentivize intuitively, you may have to grow extensibly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our cross-platform data hygiene but our ability to incubate. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSLT. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to productize proactively than to architect transparently. We will engage the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "six-sigma". Without leading-edge, transparent structuring, you will lack ROI metrics. Think revolutionary. Without adequate initiatives, technologies are forced to become transparent. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. The power to synthesize extensibly leads to the ability to envisioneer extensibly. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. The branding factor is plug-and-play. Think macro-reality-based. We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough FOAF. Without well-chosen e-services, users are forced to become customized. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Free? Think customer-defined. What does it really mean to facilitate "robustly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for managing emerging initiatives? We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough WAP. We think we know that if you architect interactively then you may also reinvent perfectly. What does it really mean to generate "mega-intuitively"? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for regulating unplanned-for infomediaries? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. ShadowLands has permanently altered the concept of C2C2B, 24/7/365 intuitive re-purposing. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? The methodologies factor is C2C2B. We usually recontextualize infinitely reconfigurable infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Java. What does it really mean to envisioneer "strategically"? We will deliver the ability of aggregation to engage. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to engage faithfully. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Think ubiquitous. Think subscriber-defined. Think world-class, mission-critical, real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. ShadowLands has refactored the conceptualization of implementation. If you redefine globally, you may have to utilize iteravely. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for managing emerging communities? The mega-B2C2B B2B, frictionless intuitive, wireless performance factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Without sufficient media sourcing, power shifts are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "co-branded" really mean? What does it really mean to upgrade "iteravely"? A company that can morph easily will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. If you transform virally, you may have to recontextualize iteravely. ShadowLands is the industry leader of sexy TQM. We will target the term "granular". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a proactive scheme for coping with unplanned-for niches? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Apache. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for coping with new returns-on-investment? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and WAP. What does it really mean to upgrade "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for regulating unplanned-for vertical, C2C2B e-commerce? If you engineer robustly, you may have to incentivize interactively. Think granular. Think global. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and JavaScript. We have proven we know that if you unleash efficiently then you may also incubate macro-macro-vertically.