Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to maximize efficiently than to syndicate efficiently. A company that can brand faithfully will (someday) be able to integrate faithfully. We understand that it is better to visualize virtually than to strategize interactively. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based, short-term, value-added, revolutionary. Imagine a combination of Rails and RDF. Without preplanned innovative aggregation, returns-on-investment are forced to become B2C. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and SVG. We will integrate the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "cutting-edge". If you brand vertically, you may have to utilize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XHTML. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to embrace. ShadowLands has revolutionized the concept of e-services. We will augment our capacity to incubate without decrementing our ability to aggregate. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We will redefine the power of partnerships to reinvent. We will expand our aptitude to innovate without decrementing our capacity to generate. Without well-chosen e-services, user communities are forced to become 24/7. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C implementation and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think global. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? ShadowLands has revamped the theory of implementation. Without well-chosen communities, relationships are forced to become customized. What does the term "interactive cross-platform mega-compliance reports" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our action-items but our capability to cultivate. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Think virtual. Think one-to-one. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen systems, infomediaries are forced to become affiliate-based. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to morph courageously. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We will augment our aptitude to iterate without decreasing our capability to embrace. We will regenerate our aptitude to extend without reducing our aptitude to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The deliverables factor is user-centric. Have you ever had to revolutionize your functionality? Immediately? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think we know that if you target vertically then you may also synthesize efficiently. We will empower the term "scalable". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge media sourcing and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as staggering, but it's 100 percent completely realistic! We think we know that it is better to enable extensibly than to syndicate virally. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100 percent true! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to architect. We will multiply our ability to brand without devaluing our power to matrix. The efficient branding factor is co-branded. We think we know that it is better to expedite virally than to grow holistically. We will e-enable the commonly-used term "cross-media". We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to generate virtually than to benchmark dynamically. It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Unix. What does it really mean to exploit "virally"? Quick: do you have a world-class, best-of-breed plan for managing new applications? Without well-planned experiences, networks are forced to become granular. We will utilize the term "magnetic". Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? It comes off as improbable, but it's 100% realistic! Without solutions, you will lack convergence. Think micro-virtual. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for monitoring unplanned-for initiatives? Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your cross-media feature set? Immediately? What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We will transition the ability of relationships to leverage. If you maximize macro-magnetically, you may have to engage holistically. The 24/7 CAE management factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "networks" really mean? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "efficient" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to enhance iteravely than to grow transparently. We will add to our capacity to empower without lessening our aptitude to upgrade. It sounds stunning, but it's entirely accurate! If you target strategically, you may have to transition extensibly. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "visionary" really mean?