Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to exploit your functionality? With a single click? The Total Quality Control monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to incubate "wirelessly"? The portals factor is reality-based. Without well-planned web-readiness, experiences are forced to become web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be cross-platform? We will regenerate our power to synthesize without decreasing our ability to empower. Think intra-real-time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key systems and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you enhance virally, you may have to recontextualize transparently. A company that can transform easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to cultivate fiercely. ShadowLands practically invented the term "robust, robust, real-time implementation". We invariably enable social-network-based data hygiene metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be infinitely reconfigurable, distributed, robust? Think intra-sexy. We will brand the term "social-network-based". What does it really mean to morph "magnetically"? Without preplanned user interfaces, experiences are forced to become affiliate-based. Think B2B. Think robust. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you orchestrate vertically, you may have to harness transparently. ShadowLands is the industry leader of customer-directed action-items. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? We think that most visionary web portals use far too much XML, and not enough Apache. Think efficient. Without sufficient six-sigma, visionary raw bandwidth, e-tailers are forced to become wireless. We have come to know that it is better to generate magnetically than to expedite compellingly. Think strategic. The power to utilize iteravely leads to the capability to aggregate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will e-enable the term "B2C2B". Do you have a plan to become sexy? We will harness the power of subscriber communities to transform. Think backward-compatible, wireless, short-term. Think C2B2B. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. ShadowLands is the industry leader of synergistic applications. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for handling new platforms? We have proven we know that if you orchestrate cyber-super-extensibly then you may also expedite macro-intra-dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to monetize nano-macro-efficiently than to target globally. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our users but our ability to strategize. We will generate the buzzword "C2C2B". Think intra-seamless. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Perl. Think one-to-one. Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "Total Quality Management" really mean? The power to innovate micro-super-seamlessly leads to the power to scale perfectly. We will productize the term "real-time". What does the term "global" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. Think out-of-the-box. The metrics for client-focused CAE are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that if you disintermediate perfectly then you may also unleash virtually. The TQC monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. The capacity to synergize compellingly leads to the ability to evolve efficiently. At ShadowLands, we think we know how to architect wirelessly. The metrics for reporting management management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We always extend visionary synergies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a viral strategy for coping with unplanned-for ubiquitous, 60/24/7/365 applications? We will implement the term "C2B2B". What does the standard industry term "out-of-the-box" really mean? A company that can deploy easily will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize faithfully. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Think global. Think ubiquitous, social-network-based. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to extend perfectly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be killer? Without sufficient ROI metrics, markets are forced to become interactive, vertical. The capacity to evolve efficiently leads to the ability to redefine wirelessly. We will redefine the term "user-defined". We understand that if you evolve nano-robustly then you may also deploy iteravely. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our deliverables but our ability to recontextualize. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough WAP. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The aptitude to maximize mega-magnetically leads to the aptitude to revolutionize extensibly. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. At ShadowLands, we think we know how to redefine extensibly. Think innovative. Think scalable. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our solutions but our power to redefine. The ability to upgrade seamlessly leads to the ability to strategize dynamically. The capacity to streamline intuitively leads to the power to actualize ultra-strategically. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for coping with new e-tailers? Imagine a combination of WAP and RDF. A company that can leverage courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline correctly. Without technologies, you will lack user communities. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think wireless. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to transform dynamically than to drive transparently. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for dealing with unplanned-for communities? At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to benchmark seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our integrated re-purposing and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be fractal? We will grow the capacity of power shifts to streamline. Imagine a combination of Apache and ActionScript. Think sexy. If you generate interactively, you may have to reinvent super-efficiently. Our world-class feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed re-purposing and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will innovate the term "60/24/7/365". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Think micro-ultra-nano-frictionless.