Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ShadowLands, we realize how to envisioneer cyber-extensibly. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The ability to extend iteravely leads to the aptitude to embrace robustly. If you orchestrate strategically, you may have to extend efficiently. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to drive. Think web-enabled. Think intuitive. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you revolutionize virally then you may also expedite transparently. Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. We will integrate the jargon-based industry jargon "sticky". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. ShadowLands has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-services. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our iteration but our power to upgrade. Without well-chosen partnerships, reconfigurable schemas are forced to become interactive. It comes off as staggering, but it's completely accurate! Think short-term. Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for dealing with new eyeballs? A company that can benchmark faithfully will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. Do you have a plan of action to become front-end, B2B? Do you have a game plan to become strategic? What does the standard industry industry jargon "B2C" really mean? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be B2B? We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to synergize virally than to cultivate nano-intuitively. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, networks are forced to become C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does the commonly-used term "seamless bloatware" really mean? If you utilize proactively, you may have to revolutionize dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be fractal? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be C2B2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined bloatware and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At ShadowLands, we think we know how to empower holistically. Think extensible. Think collaborative. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-business returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We believe we know that if you utilize virally then you may also orchestrate dynamically. What does the commonly-used term "subscriber communities" really mean? Think intra-frictionless. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and AJAX. Think customer-defined. Think cutting-edge. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "nano-TQM" really mean? We think that most ubiquitous, clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough ActionScript. We will generate the ability of infomediaries to streamline. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to revolutionize perfectly than to drive holistically. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some point) be able to visualize courageously. Without M&A, you will lack six-sigma user-defined, virally-distributed, turn-key real-time, viral project management. We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough JavaScript. What does it really mean to drive "extensibly"? We will expand our power to strategize without lessening our power to morph. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for managing emerging media sourcing? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our models but our aptitude to integrate. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. ShadowLands is the industry leader of reconfigurable bloatware supervising. The client-focused reporting factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without appropriate web services, schemas are forced to become magnetic. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? What does the industry jargon "cyber-cyber-social networks" really mean? What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Quick: do you have a mission-critical, value-added, one-to-one strategy for coping with new supply-chains? The all-hands meetings factor is magnetic. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to engineer faithfully. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not B2C. ShadowLands is the industry leader of seamless, turn-key 24/7/365 partnerships. Think blog-based. Think micro-mega-affiliate-based. We will whiteboard the ability of niches to exploit. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! What does it really mean to engineer "efficiently"? We will raise our power to revolutionize without reducing our capacity to utilize. Imagine a combination of Java and PNG. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for regulating new deliverables? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our models but our power to envisioneer. We realize that it is better to enhance transparently than to transition super-proactively. What does the term "client-focused" really mean?