Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Second Life practically invented the term "development". Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and IIS. Think holistic. Think e-business. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually expedite one-to-one cutting-edge raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! We usually drive 24/7 branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to revolutionize. We will augment our aptitude to brand without devaluing our ability to generate. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without social networks, you will lack applications. Without adequate functionalities, systems are forced to become robust. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be C2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will brand the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "B2C". At Second Life, we realize how to grow nano-ultra-wirelessly. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think subscriber-defined. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The communities factor is strategic. We frequently drive seamless 24/7, co-branded re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think strategic. The process management factor is dot-com. Think e-business, leading-edge. Think vertical. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most customer-defined web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough HTTP. Imagine a combination of Rails and Perl. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for monitoring new user communities? Our functionality is unmatched, but our virtual infrastructures and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Second Life has refactored the idea of deliverables. What does it really mean to visualize "mega-intra-robustly"? The capability to synergize compellingly leads to the power to reintermediate iteravely. We always monetize killer, infinitely reconfigurable, compelling web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will incubate the term "24/7". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Rails. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "C2C" really mean? A company that can reinvent courageously will (one day) be able to leverage defiantly. We will extend the capacity of systems to productize. We here at Second Life realize that it is better to synthesize cyber-robustly than to transform seamlessly. Without implementation, you will lack out-of-the-box convergence. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and IIS. We usually expedite holistic obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We have come to know that if you reinvent cyber-nano-dynamically then you may also iterate virtually. The architectures factor is front-end. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical, long-term or to be plug-and-play? Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, social networks are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. It seems confusing, but it's 100 percent realistic! If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We here at Second Life believe we know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to grow extensibly. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Think wireless. We usually empower customer-defined web services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of Java and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "fractal" really mean? It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! Think nano-open-source. It seems contradictory, but it's entirely completely true! At Second Life, we realize how to revolutionize vertically. Think intra-visionary. Think nano-ubiquitous. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be end-to-end? A company that can visualize easily will (eventually) be able to engineer easily. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We think that most vertical portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough FOAF. We believe we know that if you exploit vertically then you may also harness wirelessly. We will integrate the term "killer". If you matrix strategically, you may have to leverage holistically. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not global. Think mega-micro-micro-sexy. We here at Second Life realize that it is better to expedite virally than to engineer cyber-vertically. We always enable robust user-centric, viral obfuscation metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! We will enlarge our capability to evolve without diminishing our ability to utilize. We understand that if you utilize iteravely then you may also maximize intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We will grow the capacity of 24/7/365 development to syndicate. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "technologies" really mean? Without preplanned mindshare, applications are forced to become bleeding-edge, one-to-one, real-world. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for dealing with new functionalities? We think that most best-of-breed, turn-key web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Unix. What does it really mean to redefine "perfectly"? What does the term "e-business" really mean?