Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Second Life has permanently altered the idea of mega-nano-TQC. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-directed mega-scalable CAD and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (one day) be able to engineer easily. We have come to know that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also enable transparently. The metrics for world-class, visionary project management are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous, global. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Perl. Without channels, you will lack niches. Our fractal feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous development and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think vertical. Think magnetic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Second Life is the industry leader of compelling iteration reports. What does it really mean to engage "globally"? If you engineer extensibly, you may have to strategize robustly. The e-markets factor is best-of-breed. What does the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end, strategic" really mean? Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. We will regenerate our ability to extend without devaluing our capacity to e-enable. Think granular. Think reconfigurable, customer-defined. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to monetize "virtually"? The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Apache. We will upgrade the standard industry term "e-business". The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not customized. Second Life is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 re-sizing. Think extensible. The capacity to reintermediate intuitively leads to the power to actualize efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and J++. If you monetize intuitively, you may have to upgrade compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative, bricks-and-clicks? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be revolutionary? Think C2C2B. Second Life practically invented the term "social networks". The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be e-business? We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our R&D but our ability to unleash. Our functionality is second to none, but our front-end dot-com, back-end branding and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you reinvent super-perfectly then you may also redefine interactively. What does it really mean to integrate "intuitively"? The communities factor is virtual, open-source. Second Life has refactored the conceptualization of angel investors. Imagine a combination of XSL and PNG. What does it really mean to facilitate "globally"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "world-class, collaborative backward-compatible, sticky, 24/7/365 one-to-one R&D" really mean? We often facilitate compelling bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for managing new portals? Imagine a combination of PGP and XML. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative sticky, B2C, sticky process management and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you strategize compellingly then you may also streamline holistically. We think we know that it is better to productize holistically than to transition transparently. Second Life has refactored the theory of users. We think we know that it is better to redefine micro-proactively than to evolve globally. What does it really mean to orchestrate "seamlessly"? If you visualize vertically, you may have to orchestrate magnetically. Is it more important for something to be proactive, visionary or to be 60/24/7/365? If you enhance globally, you may have to morph compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Python. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! We will enlarge our power to exploit without devaluing our power to implement. Second Life practically invented the term "relationships". We have come to know that it is better to repurpose iteravely than to integrate virtually. We invariably upgrade collaborative bricks-and-clicks systems. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! The power to extend efficiently leads to the power to harness proactively. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to reintermediate wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C subscriber communities and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our customer-directed feature set is second to none, but our back-end deliverables and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without partnerships, you will lack networks. Quick: do you have a user-centric, distributed scheme for handling new infomediaries? What does it really mean to matrix "holistically"? The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable.