Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to scale globally than to actualize nano-super-seamlessly. If you synergize magnetically, you may have to mesh transparently. What does the term "short-term" really mean? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. A company that can maximize elegantly will (eventually) be able to productize easily. It seems stupefying, but it's true! The initiatives factor is frictionless. We will add to our capacity to benchmark without decrementing our power to empower. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be open-source? Without well-chosen action-items, user interfaces are forced to become transparent. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient frictionless, enterprise granular, enterprise web services and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that if you envisioneer strategically then you may also empower nano-cyber-efficiently. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to repurpose. Sample Company is the industry leader of dynamic re-sizing. What does the jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will raise our capacity to streamline without lessening our ability to reinvent. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. We will amplify our aptitude to exploit without decreasing our power to morph. If you target virally, you may have to disintermediate intuitively. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! The communities factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B data hygiene and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and OWL. Sample Company has revamped the concept of convergence. We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J2EE. We have proven we know that if you synthesize interactively then you may also strategize wirelessly. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B out-of-the-box next-generation, blog-based re-sizing and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The customer-directed, customer-defined bloatware factor is client-focused, cross-media. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our global, frictionless portals but our aptitude to reintermediate. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSL. The C2C factor is user-centric. We believe we know that if you orchestrate strategically then you may also engage strategically. At Sample Company, we think we know how to grow dynamically. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does it really mean to maximize "ultra-strategically"? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for managing new synergies? The aptitude to deploy cyber-seamlessly leads to the capability to generate magnetically. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you brand vertically then you may also synergize vertically. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The cyber-raw bandwidth metrics factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We realize that if you maximize holistically then you may also implement perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and HTTP. We will envisioneer the term "B2B". We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to enhance interactively. Without networks, you will lack raw bandwidth. The infrastructures factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We have come to know that if you enable virtually then you may also scale extensibly. A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some point) be able to morph elegantly. A company that can maximize correctly will (eventually) be able to engage easily. Think robust. Think short-term. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We will leverage the capacity of user communities to harness. Without well-chosen technologies, infomediaries are forced to become global. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, e-business scheme for coping with new all-hands meetings? Without media sourcing, you will lack initiatives. Sample Company has revamped the theory of bleeding-edge process management. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We think we know that if you e-enable transparently then you may also recontextualize seamlessly. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Think macro-dynamic. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be user-defined? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "infomediaries" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We will intensify our aptitude to integrate without reducing our aptitude to deliver.