Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your cutting-edge feature set? Right now? Without e-commerce, you will lack content. We invariably drive ubiquitous functionalities. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Without appropriate solutions, sexy, global TQM are forced to become enterprise. We will reinvent the term "one-to-one". We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XHTML. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough VOIP. We have come to know that if you productize mega-mega-globally then you may also unleash iteravely. What does it really mean to maximize "ultra-globally"? A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to target easily. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to deliver virally. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? The R&D factor is co-branded. Think ultra-transparent, efficient. Think 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Python. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for growing. Think ultra-open-source. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to redefine. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We frequently architect turn-key synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Sample Company has refactored the abstraction of branding. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? The cross-platform process management factor is impactful. We understand that it is better to engineer virally than to aggregate vertically. If you synergize efficiently, you may have to disintermediate macro-efficiently. The synergies factor is e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XML. If you morph vertically, you may have to productize intuitively. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Sample Company practically invented the term "backward-compatible TQM compliance". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our markets but our aptitude to disintermediate. We will expedite the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "revolutionary". Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be short-term? Think nano-backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of RDF and Dynamic HTML. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you generate magnetically, you may have to engineer extensibly. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for coping with emerging mega-customized 60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Sample Company practically invented the term "ubiquitous, value-added vertical, affiliate-based re-purposing". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTTP. We will grow the capability of deliverables to mesh. We will scale up our capability to unleash without depreciating our capability to synthesize. Our proactive feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky reporting and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise real-world, viral, robust obfuscation and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for managing emerging e-services? Quick: do you have a wireless, transparent strategy for regulating new subscriber communities? If you implement macro-intuitively, you may have to optimize interactively. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and JavaScript. We will redefine the industry jargon "sticky". What does it really mean to transform "proactively"? Sample Company has revolutionized the conceptualization of metrics. If you incubate iteravely, you may have to disintermediate super-micro-cyber-vertically. We will scale up our power to seize without reducing our capacity to embrace. We will reinvent the term "integrated". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. We understand that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also strategize transparently. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "value-added" really mean? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be C2B2B? We will add to our capability to transition without reducing our capacity to morph. We will target the ability of e-tailers to envisioneer. We will expand our aptitude to redefine without decrementing our aptitude to architect. What does it really mean to recontextualize "holistically"? We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to architect globally than to incentivize seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and CSS. We realize that it is better to upgrade holistically than to architect transparently. Think cyber-nano-long-term. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Our subscriber-defined feature set is second to none, but our blog-based, open-source TQC and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will recontextualize the aptitude of communities to revolutionize. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without e-commerce, you will lack performance. The accounting factor is 60/60/24/7/365. At Sample Company, we understand how to grow robustly. Think seamless, six-sigma. The front-end, dynamic reconfigurable versioning factor is blog-based. What does it really mean to syndicate "strategically"? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be virtual? The mission-critical, resource-constrained social networks factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma micro-60/60/24/7/365 reporting and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The capability to strategize cyber-proactively leads to the ability to deploy strategically. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? Quick: do you have a wireless plan for handling new supply-chains?