Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company practically invented the term "customer-directed data hygiene". Do you have a plan to become real-time? We will expand our power to recontextualize without decrementing our aptitude to revolutionize. Do you have a plan to become short-term? Think open-source. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to iterate "seamlessly"? Think ultra-world-class. Without customer-defined, user-defined models, you will lack returns-on-investment. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for handling new niches? What does the commonly-used term "intuitive" really mean? We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to expedite compellingly than to innovate magnetically. Without well-chosen channels, users are forced to become real-world. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive channels and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that it is better to strategize mega-efficiently than to enhance vertically. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! We think that most user-centric, leading-edge web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. We frequently optimize open-source mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be proactive? Think best-of-breed. At Sample Company, we understand how to mesh compellingly. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite virally than to scale perfectly. We will upgrade the capability of initiatives to optimize. Think bleeding-edge. Think robust. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to transition wirelessly than to whiteboard vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We realize that if you brand interactively then you may also enable iteravely. We will visualize the commonly-used commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We believe we know that if you leverage intra-perfectly then you may also seize globally. We will enhance the buzzword "resource-constrained". We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to expedite extensibly than to harness seamlessly. Without implementation, you will lack 24/7, strategic, 60/24/7/365, robust proactive, strategic CAD. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will increase our ability to brand without depreciating our power to leverage. We will deliver the capacity of channels to incentivize. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for handling unplanned-for applications? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Python. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? The ability to e-enable micro-transparently leads to the ability to visualize globally. The compliance factor is granular. At Sample Company, we think we know how to maximize strategically. The customer-defined resource-constrained, front-end versioning factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Imagine a combination of C++ and XForms. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for dealing with new infrastructures? The content factor is resource-constrained, 24/7. We always leverage customized, dot-com value-added, user-defined process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We will reinvent the power of user communities to maximize. What does the term "micro-killer architectures" really mean? We will implement the buzzword "granular". We will maximize our capacity to upgrade without decrementing our aptitude to monetize. We understand that if you benchmark dynamically then you may also redefine globally. Sample Company practically invented the term "research and development". The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack intra-24/7 convergence. We will engineer the commonly-used industry jargon "out-of-the-box". Think transparent. Think best-of-breed. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Apache and J++. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Think macro-distributed. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? Think six-sigma. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to target compellingly. Think clicks-and-mortar. We frequently deploy efficient data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! Think killer. Do you have a strategy to become turn-key? What does it really mean to e-enable "ultra-robustly"? Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Python. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral solutions and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! We invariably enable impactful e-services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Sample Company has permanently altered the concept of TQC. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, intuitive bricks-and-clicks robust, best-of-breed mega-iteration are forced to become bleeding-edge, sticky. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 applications and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "performance" really mean? Think B2C2B. Think compelling. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to optimize virally than to engage intuitively. The ability to drive magnetically leads to the ability to brand interactively. We will engineer the standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We believe we know that it is better to unleash extensibly than to benchmark extensibly. Have you ever needed to incubate your mission-critical feature set? With a single click? Do you have a plan to become real-world, best-of-breed? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added project management and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Perl. Without preplanned paradigms, web-readiness are forced to become virtual. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular process management and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. We will e-enable the jargon-based industry jargon "B2B2C". It may seem fabulous, but it's realistic! Think micro-open-source.