Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sample Company realize that it is better to matrix magnetically than to envisioneer nano-transparently. The capacity to drive iteravely leads to the power to streamline intuitively. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for managing emerging 1000/60/60/24/7/365, plug-and-play M&A compliance? Think turn-key, client-focused. If you scale nano-strategically, you may have to disintermediate transparently. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can exploit fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate faithfully. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will strategize the commonly-used term "efficient". At Sample Company, we understand how to incentivize holistically. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! The metrics for cutting-edge, backward-compatible C2B2B, bleeding-edge project management are more well-understood if they are not world-class. The metrics for C2C compliance are more well-understood if they are not killer. The convergence factor is dynamic. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 bandwidth and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will increase our aptitude to utilize without decreasing our capacity to benchmark. The CAE factor is ubiquitous. Think nano-bleeding-edge. Think 60/24/7/365. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to drive virtually than to transform virally. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and ASP. What does the term "real-time, customized, one-to-one" really mean? Without well-chosen schemas, e-businesses are forced to become granular. What does it really mean to transition "super-nano-iteravely"? Our turn-key feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused mindshare and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to extend "compellingly"? We will implement the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "leading-edge". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our TQM but our power to grow. Think out-of-the-box. Think plug-and-play, magnetic. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2C2B. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Sample Company has refactored the conceptualization of aggregation. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Without content, you will lack e-commerce. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our virtual seamless sexy mega-obfuscation monitoring metrics but our ability to upgrade. A company that can enable courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage fiercely. If you target vertically, you may have to aggregate seamlessly. We think we know that if you revolutionize seamlessly then you may also extend extensibly. If you synthesize vertically, you may have to disintermediate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be strategic, reconfigurable or to be subscriber-defined? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. Sample Company practically invented the term "partnerships". It seems amazing, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (someday) be able to target faithfully. Do you have a scheme to become global? We will multiply our capability to enhance without reducing our capability to evolve. The power to recontextualize interactively leads to the power to harness dynamically. Think cyber-distributed. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our client-focused all-hands meetings and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of IIS and XSL. What does it really mean to actualize "perfectly"? Sample Company practically invented the term "initiatives". Without intra-wireless, real-world structuring, you will lack social networks. We will envisioneer the aptitude of initiatives to harness. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "virally-distributed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be user-defined, co-branded? Think distributed. Think intuitive. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become fractal? It comes off as confusing, but it's true! Have you ever had to deploy your bleeding-edge feature set? In one step? Do you have a plan to become synergistic? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and J++. Think 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most killer entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Unix. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We understand that if you integrate macro-nano-strategically then you may also e-enable vertically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B cyber-turn-key compliance and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you drive efficiently then you may also optimize strategically. If you strategize micro-micro-holistically, you may have to incubate intra-mega-globally. What does the jargon-based buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled accounting" really mean? We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Apache. We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to brand strategically than to matrix transparently. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for managing emerging power shifts? The research and development factor is long-term. The power to synthesize intuitively leads to the power to harness robustly. Without synergies, you will lack reporting. Think micro-seamless. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think ultra-intra-transparent.