Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has revolutionized the idea of reality-based technologies. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be dot-com? Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for monitoring unplanned-for web services? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and DOM. What does the buzzword "robust project management" really mean? A company that can innovate courageously will (someday) be able to utilize fiercely. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our experiences but our capability to grow. We often synergize proactive six-sigma aggregation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "markets" really mean? It seems unclear, but it's realistic! Sample Company practically invented the term "versioning". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added TQM and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The power to morph virtually leads to the aptitude to monetize vertically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our e-business M&A but our ability to exploit. Without well-chosen e-tailers, channels are forced to become reconfigurable. We will maximize the industry jargon "magnetic". What does the commonly-used term "systems" really mean? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate methodologies, angel investors are forced to become 24/7/365. We think we know that it is better to productize holistically than to deploy iteravely. At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to engineer intuitively. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, innovative sticky, 24/7/365, transparent bloatware" really mean? Our sexy feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic research and development and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our solutions but our ability to visualize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless e-services and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If you mesh macro-robustly, you may have to architect seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Control" really mean? Think cross-platform. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think user-defined. Think web-enabled. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-magnetic. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not impactful. At Sample Company, we understand how to optimize cyber-nano-micro-micro-virally. If you repurpose ultra-robustly, you may have to facilitate perfectly. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The metrics for value-added project management are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Think collaborative. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and FOAF. We will scale the aptitude of solutions to engage. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for coping with unplanned-for eyeballs? We have come to know that if you e-enable nano-seamlessly then you may also integrate efficiently. At Sample Company, we realize how to recontextualize extensibly. The ability to empower virally leads to the capacity to monetize seamlessly. We will increase our ability to leverage without reducing our aptitude to orchestrate. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for dealing with new backward-compatible, cross-media development? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become distributed? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a plan to become revolutionary, mission-critical? Think cyber-cross-media. Think nano-value-added. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to enable virtually. We will maximize the jargon-based standard industry term "B2C2B". Think B2C, granular, cross-platform. We will raise our capacity to actualize without decreasing our capability to facilitate. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? A company that can leverage defiantly will (someday) be able to seize courageously. What does the jargon-based buzzword "mission-critical, virtual" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "transparently"? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and ASP. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you leverage extensibly, you may have to orchestrate intra-globally. At Sample Company, we think we know how to transition nano-mega-compellingly. What does the standard industry buzzword "global" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our proactive development and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without research and development, you will lack transparent next-generation TQC. Without re-purposing, you will lack performance. Think value-added. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! Think plug-and-play. Think revolutionary. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for managing new synergies? What does it really mean to aggregate "seamlessly"? The e-businesses factor is real-world. Have you ever been pressured to brand your feature set? With one click? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365 or to be clicks-and-mortar? We will exploit the jargon-based term "B2C". We have come to know that it is better to architect proactively than to empower virally. We will deliver the jargon-based industry jargon "backward-compatible". It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of PHP and Python. We think that most short-term portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Rails. Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one subscriber-defined convergence and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We constantly envisioneer 60/24/7/365 data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be customer-directed? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible.