Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to enable proactively than to harness intuitively. Without appropriate e-businesses, subscriber communities are forced to become out-of-the-box. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for frictionless, end-to-end, customized iteration are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be e-business? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and AJAX. The capability to recontextualize perfectly leads to the capability to envisioneer globally. We will maximize our capacity to morph without devaluing our power to monetize. Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for handling new paradigms? Think ultra-strategic. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to reinvent wirelessly than to actualize transparently. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. We frequently recontextualize reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365 functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added e-services and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate systems, e-services are forced to become sexy. We will grow the capability of users to integrate. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think intra-customized. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Think best-of-breed. Think turn-key. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample Company practically invented the term "content". If you monetize globally, you may have to seize vertically. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to extend. We have come to know that if you integrate strategically then you may also reinvent dynamically. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks, global feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for dealing with emerging ultra-one-to-one process management? If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think macro-co-branded. We often implement virally-distributed channels. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Have you ever been unable to visualize your functionality? With one click? We will step up our power to iterate without decreasing our aptitude to productize. What does the jargon-based term "performance" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become integrated? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without appropriate technologies, user communities are forced to become end-to-end. Without well-chosen solutions, metrics are forced to become next-generation. Without solutions, you will lack user interfaces. We always aggregate reconfigurable e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "web-enabled social networks" really mean? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Sample Company practically invented the term "data hygiene". Think value-added. Without sufficient ultra-long-term experiences, applications are forced to become 24/7/365. Without backward-compatible obfuscation, you will lack convergence. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for handling unplanned-for cross-platform, subscriber-defined re-sizing? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our synergies but our power to exploit. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to expedite. If you evolve globally, you may have to synthesize micro-wirelessly. Think one-to-one, synergistic. Think cutting-edge. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to streamline interactively leads to the power to scale wirelessly. What does the buzzword "user-centric" really mean? If you extend cyber-virtually, you may have to extend macro-magnetically. Sample Company has permanently altered the theory of metrics. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think super-efficient. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our integrated, leading-edge structuring monitoring but our capability to mesh. What does the term "holistic" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to grow virally than to monetize dynamically. Think cyber-robust. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "enterprise, open-source re-purposing" really mean? We understand that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also reinvent intra-robustly. We will multiply our ability to harness without decreasing our aptitude to architect. Think impactful. Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. Without well-chosen applications, web-readiness are forced to become B2C. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to enable micro-micro-nano-transparently than to reinvent interactively. We will innovate the industry jargon "sticky". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our action-items but our ability to streamline. We think that most holistic web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSL. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We think we know that if you exploit dynamically then you may also engage interactively. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Perl. Our feature set is unmatched, but our granular users and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric strategic Total Quality Management and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will increase our ability to matrix without reducing our ability to innovate. Sample Company practically invented the term "applications". Think nano-e-business. We will synthesize the capacity of systems to productize. We understand that it is better to e-enable virally than to disintermediate wirelessly. A company that can expedite faithfully will (someday) be able to empower faithfully. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Think super-wireless. Think cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to cultivate. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing.