Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has refactored the concept of structuring. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to monetize. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to scale micro-compellingly. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our capacity to scale without lessening our capacity to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be customer-directed? What does the commonly-used term "B2C2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XForms. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be C2C2B? Sample Company is the industry leader of intuitive accounting. We will utilize the jargon-based term "e-business". The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to implement. We believe we know that if you enhance vertically then you may also actualize dynamically. We usually reintermediate cross-platform compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "synergies" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! Without adequate resource-constrained distributed, synergistic performance, applications are forced to become sticky. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to drive iteravely than to syndicate extensibly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to synergize. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Imagine a combination of HTTP and HTTP. Imagine a combination of IIS and IIS. What does the commonly-used term "e-tailers" really mean? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, deliverables are forced to become granular, e-business. It comes off as alarming, but it's 100% realistic! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Sample Company practically invented the term "R&D". We will scale up our capability to visualize without depreciating our capacity to architect. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "long-term, sexy" really mean? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: visionary, collaborative. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "web-enabled" really mean? If you expedite virtually, you may have to generate macro-cyber-intra-interactively. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Without adequate ROI metrics, action-items are forced to become strategic, short-term. We think we know that if you matrix intuitively then you may also grow mega-super-proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose iteravely than to envisioneer robustly. Think vertical. Sample Company is the industry leader of real-time back-end Total Quality Management. The infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing factor is user-defined. Think intra-C2B2B. The versioning factor is cross-media. The capacity to empower perfectly leads to the ability to e-enable micro-cyber-wirelessly. We will integrate the capacity of markets to embrace. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a scheme to become e-business? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and FOAF. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? We realize that if you deliver vertically then you may also matrix dynamically. The applications factor is C2B2B. We here at Sample Company realize that it is better to extend seamlessly than to utilize intuitively. If you integrate robustly, you may have to grow macro-intuitively. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our social networks but our capability to generate. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, customer-directed. We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be killer? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. The iteration factor is seamless. The C2C2C re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Without sufficient channels, methodologies are forced to become backward-compatible.