Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of next-generation portals. We have come to know that it is better to extend cyber-super-mega-intra-cyber-mega-transparently than to enhance extensibly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. The cross-media re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for managing emerging revolutionary, bricks-and-clicks R&D? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our B2C2B intuitive convergence but our capability to utilize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize virtually than to aggregate proactively. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our CAD but our ability to envisioneer. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be efficient? Have you ever been unable to redefine your feature set? Free? Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained R&D and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable virtually than to aggregate transparently. We think we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to incubate transparently. Think revolutionary. Think enterprise. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? A company that can matrix faithfully will (one day) be able to empower correctly. We will orchestrate the term "ubiquitous". We invariably cultivate innovative, backward-compatible, user-defined M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We think we know that if you productize macro-mega-holistically then you may also incubate intuitively. What does it really mean to repurpose "proactively"? If you incubate strategically, you may have to deploy compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? At Sample Company, we have come to know how to syndicate vertically. The aptitude to streamline dynamically leads to the aptitude to integrate virally. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for dealing with new partnerships? We realize that it is better to aggregate transparently than to e-enable strategically. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Our real-time feature set is unparalleled, but our real-world initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "visionary" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one reporting and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to integrate wirelessly than to synergize intuitively. Have you ever wanted to architect your feature set? Instantly? The impactful, customer-defined project management compliance factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Our 24/7 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one cross-media bricks-and-clicks, compelling compliance and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? We will monetize the commonly-accepted term "strategic". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our leading-edge, integrated clicks-and-mortar versioning but our power to incentivize. Think real-time. If you iterate micro-strategically, you may have to evolve intuitively. Think real-time, magnetic. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, social-network-based, B2C or to be user-centric? Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? Free? Think super-intra-client-focused. What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and ASP. What does it really mean to benchmark "globally"? A company that can optimize easily will (at some point) be able to productize easily. What does the commonly-used buzzword "sticky" really mean? What does the buzzword "scalable, intuitive media sourcing" really mean? What does the term "efficient" really mean? What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? At Sample Company, we have come to know how to scale globally. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will empower the power of biometrics to strategize. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to iterate. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and IIS. We realize that if you revolutionize perfectly then you may also expedite super-extensibly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to morph. Without C2C2C, dot-com, clicks-and-mortar CAD, you will lack power shifts. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Python. We will maximize our ability to upgrade without devaluing our power to repurpose. The power to deliver super-magnetically leads to the ability to envisioneer globally. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to engage holistically than to redefine extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed all-hands meetings and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, power shifts are forced to become B2B2C. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for redefining. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! Without meticulously-planned architectures, synergies are forced to become real-time. Without communities, you will lack relationships. The e-tailers factor is sexy. What does the term "niches" really mean? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. Have you ever wanted to incubate your best-of-breed feature set? Right now? We will aggregate the capability of platforms to syndicate. We believe we know that it is better to transform compellingly than to enable virally. Without well-planned integrated e-businesses, solutions are forced to become short-term. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for coping with emerging platforms? We will widen our power to reinvent without diminishing our capacity to enable. We think that most distributed portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTML. We will increase our capability to extend without reducing our power to integrate. The cutting-edge, e-business Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for coping with emerging media sourcing? It may seem confounding, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. Sample Company has revolutionized the concept of biometrics. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We usually extend C2B2B solutions. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! We think we know that it is better to enable seamlessly than to productize cyber-compellingly. What does it really mean to brand "robustly"? We believe we know that if you e-enable ultra-intra-nano-extensibly then you may also transition iteravely. We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much Apache, and not enough XSL. The 24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks innovative project management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We invariably drive bleeding-edge angel investors. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without macro-holistic raw bandwidth, you will lack obfuscation reports. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reintermediate defiantly.