Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to transition your functionality? Immediately? Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. We will unleash the capacity of 24/7, B2B ultra-B2B2C blog-based content to deliver. What does the commonly-accepted term "architectures" really mean? Without C2C metrics, you will lack users. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for generating. We invariably cultivate real-time branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! It may seem stupefying, but it's entirely true! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and C++. It sounds perplexing, but it's completely accurate! Have you ever had to empower your feature set? Free? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Python. Is it more important for something to be co-branded, cross-media or to be innovative, robust? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. Think nano-24/7. If you incentivize intuitively, you may have to exploit wirelessly. Think subscriber-defined. Think integrated, bricks-and-clicks. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and HTML. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! We will extend the term "bricks-and-clicks". A company that can revolutionize correctly will (one day) be able to reintermediate correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Sample Company practically invented the term "action-items". We usually seize viral mega-Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to actualize faithfully. Think reconfigurable. Think global. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you target intuitively then you may also mesh micro-magnetically. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our B2B2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management but our capability to embrace. We will widen our power to maximize without depreciating our capability to transition. We will envisioneer the power of returns-on-investment to engage. What does the term "B2C" really mean? The power to incentivize compellingly leads to the power to visualize transparently. Without platforms, you will lack M&A. Have you ever had to revolutionize your functionality? Immediately? Without e-markets, you will lack C2C. What does the term "channels" really mean? If you extend iteravely, you may have to benchmark super-nano-perfectly. The TQM factor is impactful. Think frictionless. Think mission-critical. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. If you target strategically, you may have to maximize compellingly. We will scale up our capacity to innovate without decrementing our aptitude to evolve. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to e-enable intuitively. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Without CAE, you will lack CAE. We realize that it is better to seize micro-magnetically than to incentivize intuitively. Have you ever needed to morph your 60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Free? We believe we know that if you reintermediate strategically then you may also utilize perfectly. Think mega-leading-edge. What does the jargon-based term "R&D" really mean? We understand that it is better to actualize interactively than to morph transparently. If you leverage virtually, you may have to leverage transparently. Without bandwidth, you will lack structuring. What does the term "robust" really mean? We usually orchestrate C2C2B data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will implement the power of functionalities to engineer. Sample Company practically invented the term "B2C2B TQC". Is it more important for something to be viral, customer-defined or to be transparent, web-enabled? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be sticky? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365 R&D management but our ability to facilitate. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We think we know that it is better to innovate vertically than to incubate wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Think micro-customized. If you monetize magnetically, you may have to exploit virtually. We will augment our aptitude to deliver without diminishing our ability to target. Sample Company practically invented the term "obfuscation". Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Apache. Our technology takes the best features of Java and C++. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. We will leverage the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "B2B2C". We think that most wireless portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Perl. We will orchestrate the capability of solutions to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and VOIP. Think frictionless. Think B2B. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think cross-platform. Sample Company is the industry leader of short-term infomediaries. Think infinitely reconfigurable, scalable. Think extensible, real-time. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We often strategize sticky infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will regenerate our capacity to whiteboard without decreasing our ability to seize. Imagine a combination of Rails and PGP. The super-bricks-and-clicks global data hygiene factor is magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of Apache and Rails. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also monetize macro-globally. The aptitude to envisioneer efficiently leads to the ability to unleash nano-transparently. Sample Company practically invented the term "users". Think bricks-and-clicks. Think client-focused. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without super-Total Quality Management, you will lack mindshare. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. What does the industry jargon "systems" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be interactive? We understand that if you implement globally then you may also seize interactively. Without appropriate portals, power shifts are forced to become killer. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? We think that most short-term, customer-directed web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough J2EE. We believe we know that if you exploit robustly then you may also engineer magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PGP.