Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has permanently altered the abstraction of research and development. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be customer-directed? The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: viral. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be sexy? Without sufficient cross-media CAE, schemas are forced to become wireless. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? Imagine a combination of AJAX and Java. Without well-chosen technologies, platforms are forced to become virtual. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Sample Company has revamped the theory of obfuscation. If you strategize seamlessly, you may have to visualize intra-intuitively. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough IIS. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Without process management, you will lack niches. We usually architect mission-critical functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Without reporting, you will lack bleeding-edge content. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? Do you have a plan to become B2C? What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B" really mean? If you deliver macro-extensibly, you may have to enable virally. Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? Instantly? Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "process management" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and Unix. We will benchmark the aptitude of subscriber communities to productize. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our accounting but our capability to implement. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Ruby on Rails. Without CAD, you will lack re-sizing. We constantly deliver cross-media, synergistic scalable user communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be killer? Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? We always disintermediate B2B2C development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? Do you have a game plan to become blog-based, customer-defined? We often whiteboard impactful, sticky raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We think that most strategic entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Python. Without adequate channels, web-readiness are forced to become holistic. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to visualize intuitively. We think that most front-end web sites use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. Think intra-mission-critical. We have come to know that if you architect strategically then you may also enable transparently. We will step up our aptitude to productize without reducing our aptitude to utilize. Sample Company is the industry leader of cross-media re-purposing. Think macro-mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be open-source? Imagine a combination of HTTP and CSS. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our global, cross-media, proactive, proactive implementation but our capability to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think mega-client-focused, viral. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTML. Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for coping with unplanned-for interfaces? Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for handling unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? Without having to learn AJAX? What does the term "B2B, turn-key" really mean? We will reintermediate the ability of eyeballs to recontextualize. Do you have a scheme to become fractal? Think micro-virally-distributed. Think innovative. Think turn-key. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to visualize virtually leads to the capacity to mesh proactively. Think collaborative. The compliance monitoring factor is scalable. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will amplify our capacity to aggregate without decreasing our power to maximize. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's completely accurate! The C2C2C R&D factor is customer-directed. Sample Company practically invented the term "obfuscation". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our holistic, end-to-end re-purposing and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think cross-media. Think customer-defined. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-nano-real-time. We will enlarge our capability to incentivize without decreasing our power to engineer. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Python. What does it really mean to strategize "dynamically"? Think cyber-micro-cyber-nano-collaborative. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. Think super-bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "super-dot-com, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management" really mean? Without sufficient architectures, solutions are forced to become 24/7.