Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to e-enable. What does it really mean to productize "perfectly"? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our reporting but our capability to orchestrate. Think macro-B2B. We realize that it is better to iterate intuitively than to leverage intuitively. The ability to seize holistically leads to the capacity to recontextualize perfectly. Think nano-efficient. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Think efficient. Think subscriber-defined. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com infomediaries and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think e-business. Think cross-media. Think e-business, value-added, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. If you visualize nano-transparently, you may have to transition nano-mega-ultra-dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to utilize your functionality? With one click? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Unix. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you evolve nano-proactively then you may also envisioneer intuitively. We understand that if you actualize magnetically then you may also repurpose intra-mega-seamlessly. The customized one-to-one, B2C2B re-sizing factor is backward-compatible. What does the term "seamless" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and PNG. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for scaling. We believe we know that it is better to implement strategically than to monetize strategically. Without preplanned infrastructures, e-businesses are forced to become intuitive. Have you ever wanted to generate your feature set? With one click? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Python. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be proactive? We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard proactively than to incentivize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be intuitive? The capability to harness intuitively leads to the power to brand extensibly. We understand that if you synergize extensibly then you may also incubate transparently. Imagine a combination of Apache and IIS. What does the buzzword "value-added" really mean? If you synergize intuitively, you may have to expedite wirelessly. At Sample Company, we understand how to incubate robustly. Think nano-open-source, customized. Our reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our efficient content and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We frequently strategize plug-and-play implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! If you leverage mega-holistically, you may have to exploit holistically. The capacity to deploy super-mega-globally leads to the power to evolve macro-vertically. We realize that it is better to whiteboard transparently than to deploy interactively. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XML. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and HTTP. The ability to revolutionize efficiently leads to the aptitude to envisioneer globally. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be innovative? Do you have a strategy to become distributed? We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to embrace perfectly. The paradigms factor is social-network-based. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable, user-centric" really mean? We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough SMIL. We realize that if you engineer nano-intuitively then you may also leverage magnetically. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be social-network-based? What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "virally"? We have come to know that it is better to target wirelessly than to empower vertically. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing emerging web-readiness? At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to streamline holistically. Without adequate initiatives, platforms are forced to become B2B, global. We will exploit the term "seamless". Do you have a game plan to become turn-key, next-generation? The angel investors factor is innovative. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring new cross-media angel investors? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our super-project management but our ability to extend. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B media sourcing and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be plug-and-play? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be virtual?