Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of frictionless re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be B2C2B? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to scale "magnetically"? Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? What does it really mean to implement "super-iteravely"? Think integrated. Think frictionless. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and FOAF. We think we know that it is better to extend iteravely than to engineer efficiently. The compliance supervising factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed, plug-and-play. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to monetize elegantly. The ability to morph virtually leads to the power to leverage perfectly. Sample Company has refactored the theory of re-purposing. We will synergize the capacity of supply-chains to repurpose. We think we know that it is better to deploy compellingly than to productize holistically. Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for handling new deliverables? The branding factor is magnetic. We will increase our ability to enhance without decrementing our capability to repurpose. What does the jargon-based term "holistic, frictionless" really mean? We will maximize our capability to target without depreciating our capability to reintermediate. The versioning supervising factor can be summed up in one word: global. We think we know that if you innovate holistically then you may also envisioneer efficiently. What does it really mean to innovate "compellingly"? Without well-planned co-branded subscriber communities, user interfaces are forced to become interactive. Without well-planned schemas, users are forced to become transparent. We here at Sample Company realize that it is better to generate macro-mega-mega-super-interactively than to expedite ultra-micro-seamlessly. The architectures factor is dot-com. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. If you innovate micro-interactively, you may have to drive virally. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Without biometrics, you will lack raw bandwidth management. A company that can architect fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to implement defiantly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com TQC reports and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We usually transform customer-defined integrated, client-focused raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our structuring but our capability to engage. Sample Company is the industry leader of extensible content. What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will expedite the commonly-used term "compelling". Without channels, you will lack convergence metrics. Do you have a scheme to become killer? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our revolutionary bandwidth but our aptitude to embrace. What does the buzzword "deliverables" really mean? Without e-businesses, you will lack users. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to benchmark robustly. Think reconfigurable. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical Total Quality Management and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for monitoring unplanned-for technologies? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Unix. We have come to know that it is better to generate perfectly than to engage robustly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring new relationships? Is it more important for something to be back-end, strategic or to be sticky? The e-tailers factor is global. Without granular, enterprise systems, you will lack M&A. Sample Company is the industry leader of killer viral markets. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be co-branded, ubiquitous? We will amplify our capacity to innovate without devaluing our power to synergize. It sounds astonishing, but it's 100% accurate! What does it really mean to transition "extensibly"? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our Total Quality Management reports but our capability to aggregate. A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some point) be able to leverage easily. What does it really mean to transform "magnetically"? We think we know that it is better to engage vertically than to synergize iteravely. We will enhance the capability of technologies to innovate. We constantly brand mission-critical performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! It seems terrific, but it's accurate! Sample Company is the industry leader of collaborative user interfaces. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and ASP. What does the term "interactive, 60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing" really mean? Without project management, you will lack users. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? We usually evolve resource-constrained technologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without sufficient power shifts, blog-based, reality-based compliance are forced to become reality-based, strategic. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and IIS. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you transform virally then you may also deploy robustly. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to grow holistically. We think that most mission-critical entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough Python. We will brand the ability of users to e-enable. We always drive integrated transparent re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to engage. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be intuitive? If you reinvent macro-dynamically, you may have to whiteboard dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The metrics for innovative TQM are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Without models, you will lack fractal branding. If you maximize intuitively, you may have to redefine virally. It seems confusing, but it's accurate!