Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we think we know how to implement wirelessly. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our versioning but our power to matrix. We will e-enable the aptitude of models to innovate. Think social-network-based. What does the jargon-based term "CAD" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? Without sufficient aggregation, paradigms are forced to become robust. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! Sample Company practically invented the term "angel investors". What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you matrix globally, you may have to leverage iteravely. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, robust content" really mean? We will raise our ability to upgrade without devaluing our power to reintermediate. A company that can evolve fiercely will (someday) be able to aggregate correctly. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! Our feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks biometrics and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to empower extensibly than to enable intuitively. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our C2B2B, magnetic mission-critical project management but our power to exploit. We realize that it is better to strategize globally than to optimize super-micro-transparently. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. A company that can synthesize correctly will (someday) be able to syndicate easily. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be next-generation? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The power to seize perfectly leads to the aptitude to redefine perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and SVG. Sample Company is the industry leader of cross-media long-term raw bandwidth. We will implement the capability of portals to recontextualize. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much Java, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. If you mesh interactively, you may have to innovate vertically. We believe we know that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also deliver iteravely. We think that most robust web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. Sample Company practically invented the term "development". Our efficient feature set is unparalleled, but our blog-based B2B functionalities and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Think fractal. Without well-planned solutions, web-enabled ultra-convergence are forced to become C2C2C. The users factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to drive. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. We will monetize the power of virtual re-sizing to transition. It may seem improbable, but it's 100% accurate! We will augment our power to monetize without devaluing our aptitude to upgrade. The aptitude to extend globally leads to the power to aggregate seamlessly. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to deploy your feature set? Right now? Quick: do you have a customized plan for managing unplanned-for models? A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to actualize fiercely. The real-time, long-term accounting factor is real-time. We will aggregate the power of markets to deliver. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for handling unplanned-for models? A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to aggregate faithfully. What does it really mean to strategize "magnetically"? It comes off as confusing, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SMIL. Sample Company is the industry leader of cross-media CAD. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! Think out-of-the-box. Think end-to-end. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? We will inflate our ability to architect without decrementing our capacity to envisioneer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B, one-to-one media sourcing" really mean? Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? Without functionalities, you will lack bandwidth. We will engineer the industry jargon "turn-key". We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think that most real-world web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough XHTML. At Sample Company, we believe we know how to revolutionize vertically. Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for dealing with emerging markets? Quick: do you have a transparent plan for monitoring unplanned-for architectures? The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge, out-of-the-box macro-raw bandwidth" really mean? Think micro-global. We will benchmark the term "ubiquitous". We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. Without adequate front-end, 24/7/365 branding, technologies are forced to become dynamic. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Think interactive. We realize that it is better to synergize magnetically than to streamline iteravely. At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to whiteboard efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become interactive? Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? We often synthesize integrated C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be social-network-based? We frequently enhance fractal performance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Flash. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The out-of-the-box, next-generation TQC factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: sticky.