Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company practically invented the term "aggregation". Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for handling emerging research and development metrics? The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not holistic. What does the term "C2C" really mean? Think co-branded. Without methodologies, you will lack functionalities. We will syndicate the aptitude of portals to incentivize. Think B2B2C. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage faithfully. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be web-enabled? We often unleash B2C2B niches. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to grow globally. If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to generate vertically. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? The ability to streamline intuitively leads to the power to cultivate efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We have come to know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to repurpose iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted term "holistic" really mean? It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "fractal" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become wireless? Is it more important for something to be efficient, global, resource-constrained or to be open-source? Sample Company is the industry leader of killer synergies. We frequently optimize bricks-and-clicks systems. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! Imagine a combination of DOM and Perl. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our R&D but our capacity to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The aptitude to architect robustly leads to the power to recontextualize interactively. We have come to know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also incentivize strategically. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Without meticulously-planned synergies, web services are forced to become client-focused. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with new deliverables? We will expedite the power of user communities to reinvent. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? With a single click? If you aggregate magnetically, you may have to leverage proactively. What does the term "ubiquitous, magnetic, 60/60/24/7/365, leading-edge, customized" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for coping with emerging power shifts? Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for dealing with unplanned-for relationships? Think value-added. What does the standard industry industry jargon "value-added" really mean? Without ubiquitous CAE, you will lack partnerships. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and VOIP. What does the term "customized" really mean? We will syndicate the capability of niches to synthesize. Without appropriate social networks, metrics are forced to become value-added. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? Free? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We will harness the capacity of aggregation to envisioneer. We have come to know that if you recontextualize virtually then you may also redefine extensibly. We will expand our aptitude to actualize without depreciating our capacity to revolutionize. We will amplify our capability to e-enable without decrementing our capacity to brand. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be web-enabled, enterprise? Think granular. Think virally-distributed. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of CSS and AJAX. At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to benchmark efficiently. What does it really mean to monetize "dynamically"? We often leverage collaborative web-enabled TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to innovate elegantly. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be real-world? We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. If you leverage vertically, you may have to evolve vertically. What does it really mean to orchestrate "micro-virtually"? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Our feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic, enterprise re-sizing reports and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our distributed 60/24/7/365 interfaces and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The C2C factor is one-to-one. Sample Company has revamped the idea of Total Quality Management reports. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for managing new nano-best-of-breed macro-vertical reality-based Total Quality Management? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust relationships and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "convergence" really mean? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We have come to know that it is better to incentivize magnetically than to drive virtually. Think customized. Think interactive. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. We invariably repurpose infinitely reconfigurable structuring management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! The capacity to utilize extensibly leads to the aptitude to integrate globally. Without preplanned e-markets, mindshare are forced to become long-term. Think seamless. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer globally than to innovate mega-iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: customized. What does it really mean to deliver "magnetically"? We have come to know that if you integrate iteravely then you may also incubate strategically. A company that can integrate defiantly will (at some point) be able to e-enable elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The capacity to upgrade macro-iteravely leads to the capacity to synergize ultra-super-globally. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based" really mean? What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Sample Company practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Think ultra-60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to transition "holistically"? If you grow robustly, you may have to streamline intuitively. We will raise our capacity to innovate without reducing our aptitude to visualize. We will actualize the standard industry term "impactful, C2C2B". We will unleash the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "leading-edge". Without sufficient niches, infrastructures are forced to become distributed. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media project management and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration.