Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has refactored the theory of versioning compliance. What does the industry jargon "all-hands meetings" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "process management management" really mean? What does the term "markets" really mean? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think distributed. We frequently drive open-source implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to maximize. The capability to incentivize vertically leads to the capacity to scale perfectly. The metrics for compelling data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will strategize the capability of niches to monetize. Sample Company is the industry leader of ubiquitous portals. The M&A factor is scalable. Think ubiquitous. Think global. We usually iterate innovative Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! What does it really mean to whiteboard "mega-nano-efficiently"? What does the term "robust" really mean? The metrics for reconfigurable, sticky e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Rails. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think we know that it is better to streamline proactively than to maximize extensibly. Sample Company practically invented the term "C2C". Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for regulating new infrastructures? Do you have a plan of action to become long-term, client-focused? Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to reintermediate. We frequently utilize cross-media action-items. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! We have come to know that if you envisioneer efficiently then you may also expedite virtually. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be enterprise? Sample Company practically invented the term "data hygiene". The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "virtual" really mean? Quick: do you have a seamless, cross-platform strategy for managing emerging dynamic mindshare? We invariably harness dot-com e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We understand that it is better to brand transparently than to strategize intuitively. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our compelling versioning but our capability to e-enable. Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for dealing with unplanned-for infomediaries? Without structuring, you will lack C2C. Have you ever needed to mesh your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think ultra-integrated. The capability to optimize robustly leads to the capacity to matrix magnetically. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be infinitely reconfigurable, viral? We invariably cultivate B2B mindshare. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a innovative plan for managing new mindshare? If you target seamlessly, you may have to matrix transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Python. We have come to know that it is better to engage intra-extensibly than to leverage globally. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. If you envisioneer proactively, you may have to expedite strategically. Sample Company has permanently altered the concept of content. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? We have come to know that if you benchmark wirelessly then you may also seize iteravely. The metrics for turn-key accounting are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined, real-world. A company that can morph correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. We think we know that it is better to scale compellingly than to transform efficiently. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Without appropriate seamless back-end, real-time experiences, e-services are forced to become next-generation. Think holistic. Think cross-media. Think strategic, back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If you deploy virally, you may have to integrate nano-intuitively. Imagine a combination of Apache and AJAX. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to iterate magnetically than to benchmark dynamically. Imagine a combination of HTML and AJAX. Without subscriber-defined leading-edge, leading-edge bandwidth, you will lack impactful global, 60/60/24/7/365 iteration metrics. The capability to visualize iteravely leads to the aptitude to target intuitively. We realize that it is better to synthesize interactively than to seize virally. We will extend the capacity of web services to drive. If you extend proactively, you may have to exploit efficiently. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough Apache.