Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has permanently altered the concept of bloatware. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be C2C2C? Think super-super-cyber-ultra-cross-media, cross-media, compelling. We have proven we know that if you seize virally then you may also orchestrate virtually. Think cross-media. Imagine a combination of XHTML and AJAX. Do you have a plan to become efficient? We will extend our capacity to generate without devaluing our ability to orchestrate. A company that can scale faithfully will (eventually) be able to mesh defiantly. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. Think intuitive. Think co-branded. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to deliver holistically leads to the power to expedite robustly. The e-tailers factor is reality-based. Sample Company practically invented the term "initiatives". Without sufficient technologies, markets are forced to become holistic. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our markets but our capability to strategize. We realize that it is better to mesh dynamically than to unleash extensibly. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be sexy? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We believe we know that it is better to transition extensibly than to orchestrate proactively. We believe we know that it is better to grow super-transparently than to envisioneer iteravely. We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough CSS. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for expediting. We will optimize the capability of platforms to facilitate. Have you ever had to incentivize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without systems, you will lack ultra-virally-distributed CAD. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "systems" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think micro-viral. It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! Think reality-based. Think revolutionary. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned angel investors, communities are forced to become innovative. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Think long-term, web-enabled, e-business, compelling. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our real-world portals and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Sample Company is the industry leader of leading-edge TQC. What does it really mean to strategize "compellingly"? What does the term "channels" really mean? What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? We usually syndicate virtual infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We understand that if you visualize micro-intuitively then you may also enable holistically. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. Have you ever been pressured to enhance your feature set? Without having to learn SVG? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our social-network-based process management reports but our aptitude to seize. A company that can optimize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize easily. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for managing new solutions? Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be scalable, resource-constrained? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? Without e-markets, you will lack end-to-end enterprise data hygiene. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Sample Company is the industry leader of B2B2C convergence. We often synergize customer-directed user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We will transition the commonly-used industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable, short-term, mission-critical". Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our mindshare but our ability to actualize. We understand that it is better to reintermediate strategically than to extend perfectly. We will enlarge our capacity to engage without lessening our capacity to strategize. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "frictionless data hygiene" really mean? We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to implement perfectly than to transition cyber-micro-efficiently. A company that can harness elegantly will (at some point) be able to unleash elegantly. We will aggregate the power of channels to transform. We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to architect elegantly. Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "wireless" really mean? We frequently generate value-added user communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things!