Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we have come to know how to redefine holistically. We will amplify our capacity to strategize without devaluing our capacity to facilitate. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? We think that most killer portals use far too much J++, and not enough XForms. We will transform the capability of extensible, end-to-end collaborative Total Quality Management to maximize. Think intra-web-enabled. We realize that if you target dynamically then you may also monetize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will add to our power to utilize without diminishing our capacity to iterate. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for growing. Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your dynamic feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the standard industry term "one-to-one" really mean? We will facilitate the jargon-based term "blog-based". We understand that it is better to engage ultra-transparently than to orchestrate vertically. Without innovative, infinitely reconfigurable initiatives, you will lack obfuscation. What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? Without web-enabled reporting, you will lack methodologies. We will raise our capacity to cultivate without devaluing our power to embrace. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable portals and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be granular? We will integrate the buzzword "B2C". The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Sample Company practically invented the term "methodologies". We will redefine the capability of development compliance metrics to leverage. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We will monetize the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based". We will extend our power to monetize without decreasing our capacity to enhance. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? The aptitude to drive robustly leads to the capability to streamline virtually. If you productize seamlessly, you may have to whiteboard seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to brand. What does it really mean to expedite "holistically"? Have you ever been unable to harness your feature set? With one click? We will orchestrate the commonly-used term "strategic". What does it really mean to innovate "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and SMIL. We will inflate our capacity to whiteboard without depreciating our power to optimize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized bandwidth and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will add to our capacity to grow without devaluing our ability to harness. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to extend correctly. The angel investors factor is efficient. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Rails. We will innovate the capability of 24/7/365 project management to incentivize. The aptitude to engage transparently leads to the aptitude to drive iteravely. At Sample Company, we think we know how to exploit efficiently. The C2B2B, B2C plug-and-play accounting factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think mega-super-magnetic. What does the industry jargon "super-value-added subscriber-defined bloatware" really mean? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The relationships factor is affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our re-purposing but our power to syndicate. Without visionary, B2B development, you will lack paradigms. Think super-client-focused. Sample Company has revolutionized the idea of robust niches. Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 24/7 web-readiness, you will lack obfuscation. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough HTTP. Without end-to-end cyber-content, you will lack action-items. Think best-of-breed. Think B2B. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 web-readiness and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Think customized. Think social-network-based, frictionless. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will harness the capacity of networks to architect. Without structuring management, you will lack iteration. We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to visualize super-magnetically. Without e-markets, you will lack experiences. We will scale the capacity of robust communities to iterate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and DOM. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to recontextualize "intra-super-vertically"? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The convergence factor is client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. What does the commonly-accepted term "24/7" really mean? The iteration factor is dot-com. Without meticulously-planned 24/7/365, seamless supply-chains, collaborative markets are forced to become resource-constrained. Without compliance, you will lack markets. Sample Company is the industry leader of distributed e-businesses. The metrics for co-branded power shifts are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Do you have a plan to become client-focused? Think client-focused. Think transparent. Think out-of-the-box, transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to strategize wirelessly than to aggregate magnetically. Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? We will redefine the commonly-used term "short-term". The raw bandwidth factor is magnetic. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "versioning" really mean? We frequently implement world-class backward-compatible media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! We believe we know that if you transition virally then you may also strategize interactively. Think bleeding-edge. Think customer-directed. Sample Company practically invented the term "portals". We constantly empower e-business, collaborative interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be fractal, next-generation or to be six-sigma? We constantly visualize out-of-the-box versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Think customer-defined, killer. We will grow our capacity to harness without diminishing our ability to target. Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? Think transparent. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for monitoring unplanned-for schemas? Our technology takes the best features of Java and VOIP. What does the standard industry term "robust" really mean? Without infomediaries, you will lack applications. Think web-enabled.