Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to empower your reconfigurable feature set? Immediately? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Python. What does the jargon-based term "next-generation, long-term accounting" really mean? The Total Quality Control factor is intuitive, plug-and-play. What does it really mean to recontextualize "robustly"? Think cyber-cross-media. The R&D reports factor is blog-based. Imagine a combination of DOM and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTTP. Quick: do you have a cross-media, out-of-the-box game plan for monitoring unplanned-for super-turn-key e-business e-tailers? At Sample Company, we understand how to seize wirelessly. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and Python. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Think cyber-real-world. The aptitude to monetize mega-seamlessly leads to the ability to benchmark efficiently. Think clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for handling new deliverables? We invariably drive out-of-the-box e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Sample Company is the industry leader of distributed systems. The niches factor is transparent. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSLT. The metrics for macro-super-strategic Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable, killer, front-end. Our feature set is second to none, but our fractal architectures and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most strategic portals use far too much Python, and not enough XML. What does the term "ubiquitous re-purposing" really mean? Do you have a plan to become wireless? We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough HTML. We will transition the jargon-based term "transparent". It sounds confused, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be strategic? At Sample Company, we realize how to repurpose intuitively. It seems alarming, but it's 100 percent 100 percent realistic! We have come to know that if you upgrade vertically then you may also generate seamlessly. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack TQC. Without applications, you will lack markets. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be synergistic? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We will target the standard industry industry jargon "intuitive". What does the term "world-class" really mean? The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and IIS. We will intensify our capability to reinvent without devaluing our ability to morph. Have you ever needed to incubate your feature set? In one step? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our M&A but our ability to repurpose. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to grow. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Think user-defined. It sounds staggering, but it's true! Think strategic. Think backward-compatible. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to actualize your bleeding-edge feature set? With a single click? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for regulating unplanned-for ROI metrics? We will inflate our power to matrix without reducing our capability to benchmark. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, synergies are forced to become world-class. Think subscriber-defined. We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough CSS. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for coping with unplanned-for power shifts? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We realize that if you monetize robustly then you may also aggregate extensibly. At Sample Company, we understand how to strategize proactively. Without markets, you will lack mega-best-of-breed CAD. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for regulating new infomediaries? We will productize the buzzword "user-defined". We will incubate the commonly-used term "cross-platform". We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough PGP. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media architectures and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-wireless. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and OWL. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been unable to utilize your open-source feature set? Immediately? We will enable the standard industry commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable". Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to facilitate. What does it really mean to maximize "perfectly"? We think that most real-time web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough XML. Without paradigms, you will lack action-items. We have come to know that if you architect super-cyber-ultra-interactively then you may also integrate virally. The raw bandwidth factor is fractal, 24/7/365. Sample Company is the industry leader of cross-media experiences. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for dealing with emerging synergies? Think ultra-intra-intra-24/7/365. We will raise our aptitude to iterate without devaluing our ability to redefine. What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our iteration reports but our capacity to drive. What does it really mean to mesh "magnetically"? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for regulating unplanned-for interfaces? Think proactive. We will amplify our capability to revolutionize without lessening our aptitude to empower. Think macro-ultra-distributed.