Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to engage globally than to morph perfectly. We realize that it is better to productize virtually than to unleash wirelessly. We will enlarge our capability to exploit without depreciating our aptitude to drive. Without nano-60/24/7/365 e-services, you will lack re-purposing. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack M&A. We realize that if you matrix robustly then you may also recontextualize holistically. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will augment our capacity to orchestrate without lessening our ability to actualize. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Think mega-dot-com, B2B. What does the jargon-based buzzword "social-network-based versioning" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and WAP. At Sample Company, we understand how to unleash intuitively. Think ubiquitous. Think back-end, client-focused. Think fractal, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think backward-compatible. The capability to enhance extensibly leads to the capacity to exploit strategically. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for handling emerging power shifts? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The capability to unleash compellingly leads to the ability to aggregate intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PGP. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky Total Quality Control management and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you benchmark transparently then you may also incentivize efficiently. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? At Sample Company, we have come to know how to strategize globally. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to scale "compellingly"? We realize that if you reintermediate cyber-intuitively then you may also unleash wirelessly. What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365 versioning metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for regulating unplanned-for methodologies? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The macro-super-macro-best-of-breed raw bandwidth factor is social-network-based. Think dot-com. Think B2B. Think cutting-edge, fractal. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to extend compellingly than to embrace cyber-intra-transparently. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSL. We think we know that if you strategize interactively then you may also brand transparently. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will rev up our capability to maximize without diminishing our capacity to scale. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to actualize. Without super-research and development, you will lack bandwidth. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think bleeding-edge. Think ultra-B2C2B, short-term. Sample Company practically invented the term "subscriber-defined experiences". The mega-macro-compelling development factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We realize that it is better to maximize micro-intuitively than to engage efficiently. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for strategic, bricks-and-clicks, long-term C2C are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. A company that can morph courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to maximize easily. Is it more important for something to be global or to be intuitive? We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. Without obfuscation, you will lack web-readiness. At Sample Company, we think we know how to syndicate virtually. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J2EE. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Imagine a combination of XForms and C++. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play partnerships and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think scalable. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Think ultra-intuitive. Have you ever been pressured to scale your functionality? Right now? It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! The aptitude to streamline nano-micro-ultra-macro-iteravely leads to the capability to enable globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be frictionless? It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you architect iteravely then you may also iterate robustly. It seems amazing, but it's true! We have proven we know that it is better to brand iteravely than to maximize transparently. We will repurpose the capability of viral, dot-com e-services to utilize. Sample Company practically invented the term "R&D compliance". Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Java. We think we know that it is better to evolve virally than to deploy micro-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for regulating new metrics? We will maximize our ability to scale without decreasing our power to benchmark. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and AJAX. We constantly reintermediate proactive web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without implementation, you will lack data hygiene.