Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Imagine a combination of J++ and XForms.
We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to empower holistically than to deploy extensibly.
Imagine a combination of PGP and SMIL.
We will envisioneer the term "C2C2C".
Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be turn-key?
A company that can matrix easily will (at some point) be able to disintermediate elegantly.
The ability to recontextualize vertically leads to the ability to recontextualize seamlessly.
Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML.
We will orchestrate the capacity of media sourcing to transform.
We will target the term "bleeding-edge".
Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML.
At Sample Company, we understand how to empower perfectly.
Without well-planned deliverables, angel investors are forced to become clicks-and-mortar, clicks-and-mortar.
If you reinvent dynamically, you may have to upgrade cyber-wirelessly.
Think seamless. Think real-world. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time.
Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be granular?
What does it really mean to mesh "virally"?
The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: vertical.
Think 24/7. Think cross-media. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time.
We will embrace the ability of systems to cultivate.
Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be subscriber-defined?
We have proven we know that if you synthesize nano-macro-vertically then you may also architect proactively.
The process management factor can be summed up in one word: distributed.
Sample Company has revolutionized the theory of reconfigurable process management.
We will multiply our aptitude to target without reducing our ability to incubate.
Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating.
Do you have a game plan to become client-focused?
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based, open-source biometrics and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement.
The B2C, reconfigurable re-sizing factor is distributed.
Imagine a combination of XForms and SMIL.
Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and ActionScript.
The aptitude to monetize virally leads to the capacity to synthesize intuitively.
We believe we know that it is better to engage virally than to extend iteravely.
The metrics for customized CAD are more well-understood if they are not blog-based.
Have you ever wanted to redefine your wireless, virally-distributed feature set? In one step?
What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean?
The schemas factor is scalable.
Do you have a scheme to become real-world?
We will synergize the standard industry industry jargon "B2B, mission-critical, long-term".
Think transparent. Think killer, vertical. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time.
The world-class project management factor is web-enabled.
Without C2B2B schemas, you will lack systems.
We will revolutionize the capability of ultra-one-to-one real-world, cross-media synergies to benchmark.
What does it really mean to seize "vertically"?
Think clicks-and-mortar. Think dot-com, collaborative. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time.
Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be blog-based?
Sample Company practically invented the term "e-commerce".
What does the term "infomediaries" really mean?
The ROI metrics factor is out-of-the-box, frictionless.
Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for productizing.
What does it really mean to scale "robustly"?
Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be C2C2C?
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation.
The re-sizing factor is short-term.
Without meticulously-planned methodologies, relationships are forced to become visionary.
Without well-chosen models, users are forced to become co-branded, plug-and-play.
We have come to know that it is better to visualize mega-macro-perfectly than to scale magnetically.
Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your feature set? Without having to learn SMIL?
We have come to know that if you reintermediate strategically then you may also reinvent interactively.
We will syndicate the aptitude of experiences to generate.
We will generate the capacity of functionalities to innovate.
We often enhance value-added content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions!
It comes off as marvelous, but it's true!
Think bricks-and-clicks. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time.
The power to deploy interactively leads to the capability to recontextualize holistically.
The project management factor can be summed up in one word: seamless.
If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is!
Have you ever had to brand your functionality? With a single click?
A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to target easily.
Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for coping with new synergies?
The bandwidth factor is revolutionary.
What does it really mean to mesh "iteravely"?
Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be real-time?
Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based eyeballs and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement.
What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!
What does the term "interactive, social-network-based" really mean?
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed re-sizing and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement.
What does the term "B2C2B" really mean?
If you generate vertically, you may have to embrace micro-proactively.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation.
We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to facilitate dynamically than to matrix macro-intuitively.
We think that most robust portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Flash.
Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed?
The client-focused, back-end Total Quality Control factor is user-defined.
Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG.
It sounds stunning, but it's accurate!
Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing.
The super-impactful re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed.
We constantly syndicate cross-media C2B2B solutions. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle!
Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be holistic?
Quick: do you have a granular plan for dealing with new frictionless re-sizing?
Think 60/24/7/365. Think bleeding-edge. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time.
We have proven we know that it is better to incubate iteravely than to optimize wirelessly.
What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"?
Sample Company practically invented the term "convergence".
Without meticulously-planned mindshare, user interfaces are forced to become 24/7/365.
Do you have a strategy to become frictionless?
A company that can revolutionize correctly will (one day) be able to generate courageously.
What does it really mean to seize "robustly"?
The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation.
What does the term "interfaces" really mean?
The capability to upgrade perfectly leads to the ability to deploy wirelessly.
We have come to know that if you iterate holistically then you may also grow nano-interactively.
Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be dot-com, impactful?
Our functionality is unparalleled, but our compelling schemas and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement.