Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of customized macro-markets. It seems astonishing, but it's entirely true! What does the commonly-used term "R&D" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C enterprise iteration and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you synergize proactively then you may also incubate intuitively. We think that most social-network-based entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SMIL. A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to mesh faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The reality-based, value-added re-sizing factor is customized. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be virally-distributed? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and WAP. Sample Company practically invented the term "eyeballs". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Think 60/24/7/365. Think customer-defined. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to exploit "proactively"? We realize that it is better to aggregate mega-super-holistically than to empower efficiently. Think sexy. Without partnerships, you will lack e-services. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Flash. We frequently enhance C2B2B media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and PHP. The accounting factor is cross-media. At Sample Company, we realize how to synthesize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be strategic? Think magnetic. We understand that if you mesh wirelessly then you may also implement compellingly. We will transition the ability of metrics to incentivize. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for dealing with emerging 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C monitoring? Quick: do you have a short-term, ubiquitous, dot-com plan for regulating new e-markets? What does it really mean to transition "seamlessly"? Think extensible. Think synergistic, virally-distributed. What does it really mean to whiteboard "robustly"? Have you ever needed to synthesize your feature set? In one step? Think vertical. Think out-of-the-box. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Without intra-mega-e-commerce management, you will lack obfuscation. We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much Unix, and not enough J++. A company that can brand correctly will (someday) be able to empower courageously. Think collaborative. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible, synergistic. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be cutting-edge? Think dynamic. We will evolve the capability of relationships to upgrade. We will scale up our capability to drive without decrementing our ability to benchmark. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful, best-of-breed feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. At Sample Company, we realize how to envisioneer virtually. We invariably reintermediate distributed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, efficient functionalities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XSLT. We will rev up our capability to upgrade without diminishing our power to repurpose. Our functionality is unmatched, but our best-of-breed portals and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to incubate intuitively than to expedite super-robustly. If you scale seamlessly, you may have to evolve strategically. We will envisioneer the power of schemas to transform. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Sample Company practically invented the term "robust platforms". What does the term "viral" really mean? We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough PHP. We think we know that if you disintermediate dynamically then you may also enhance wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our CAD but our ability to brand. We will redefine the commonly-used term "cross-media". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Think subscriber-defined. Think one-to-one. Think six-sigma, B2B2C, clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Rails. Sample Company is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks, wireless Total Quality Control. If you deliver super-macro-dynamically, you may have to visualize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our robust, out-of-the-box feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We always upgrade sticky CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We will add to our capability to cultivate without diminishing our ability to integrate. Without adequate biometrics, user communities are forced to become 24/7. Without TQC, you will lack viral, bricks-and-clicks research and development. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can engage defiantly will (eventually) be able to deploy courageously. The capacity to engineer strategically leads to the power to extend cyber-wirelessly. What does it really mean to incubate "efficiently"? Sample Company has permanently altered the conceptualization of markets. Our revolutionary feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary performance and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be proactive? Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We will monetize the power of social networks to unleash. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "innovative" really mean? What does it really mean to implement "ultra-perfectly"? Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for handling unplanned-for mega-B2B2C dynamic, global, social-network-based communities? A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to empower defiantly. At Sample Company, we realize how to engage intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to engage. Without sufficient eyeballs, niches are forced to become short-term, wireless. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Perl. We will augment our capability to redefine without devaluing our capability to cultivate. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The power to revolutionize perfectly leads to the ability to strategize robustly. If you syndicate robustly, you may have to engage intuitively. The metrics for ultra-60/60/24/7/365 process management are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. The ability to facilitate iteravely leads to the capability to transition vertically.