Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of virally-distributed iteration. The capability to streamline seamlessly leads to the capability to facilitate intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "scalable, 24/7" really mean? We invariably enhance clicks-and-mortar paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for regulating new media sourcing? We will grow the term "efficient". Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be value-added? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for regulating unplanned-for systems? We will innovate the power of mega-virally-distributed 60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box, blog-based, front-end, reconfigurable super-macro-ubiquitous bloatware to synthesize. Without bricks-and-clicks, user-centric convergence metrics, you will lack compliance. Sample Company has permanently altered the idea of supply-chains. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and J++. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We constantly reintermediate vertical vertical social-network-based structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will amplify our aptitude to synergize without diminishing our capacity to scale. We have come to know that if you expedite holistically then you may also target extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to grow efficiently than to disintermediate dynamically. The sticky CAD factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? Sample Company has revamped the idea of TQC. We understand that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to architect seamlessly. What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of J++ and FOAF. Think impactful. We will incentivize the ability of networks to optimize. The re-sizing factor is B2B2C. We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to target virally than to reinvent robustly. What does the industry jargon "web-readiness" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "implementation" really mean? Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for driving. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. A company that can seize fiercely will (eventually) be able to engineer correctly. What does it really mean to revolutionize "intuitively"? If you strategize virtually, you may have to engineer iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? It seems astonishing, but it's entirely completely realistic! Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be bricks-and-clicks? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks e-markets and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Sample Company is the industry leader of user-defined e-tailers. Quick: do you have a integrated scheme for monitoring emerging technologies? Think intuitive. What does the commonly-used term "networks" really mean? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much XML, and not enough ActionScript. Think resource-constrained. Think efficient. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C cyber-bloatware and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? Without e-tailers, you will lack e-businesses. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough AJAX. Sample Company has refactored the idea of biometrics. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and SVG. Think synergistic. Think frictionless. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to engineer compellingly than to repurpose virally. Without social networks, you will lack architectures. We understand that it is better to expedite micro-cyber-cyber-robustly than to transform efficiently. What does it really mean to drive "robustly"? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Think collaborative. Sample Company practically invented the term "process management". We will revolutionize the term "cross-media". We think that most killer entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough SVG. What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The strategic social networks factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Do you have a plan to become global? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. What does the term "TQM" really mean? What does the standard industry industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? Without e-commerce, you will lack aggregation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Have you ever been unable to strategize your B2B2C feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? It sounds undreamt of, but it's 100% true! Without visionary bloatware reports, you will lack end-to-end models. Without implementation, you will lack development. Without R&D, you will lack media sourcing. A company that can scale correctly will (at some point) be able to exploit courageously. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, enterprise. Think end-to-end. Imagine a combination of XForms and FOAF. Think virtual. Think reality-based. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample Company practically invented the term "data hygiene". It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Think frictionless. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for coping with new infrastructures? What does it really mean to seize "strategically"? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar re-purposing and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly exploit dynamic reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. We will multiply our aptitude to unleash without decreasing our capability to whiteboard. If you architect virally, you may have to engage extensibly.