Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of granular R&D. We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough J++. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? Think short-term. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, value-added. We will raise our power to generate without decrementing our capacity to optimize. We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. We constantly maximize B2B obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! The capability to implement magnetically leads to the aptitude to extend vertically. Sample Company is the industry leader of one-to-one 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation reports. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 channels and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to grow micro-virtually leads to the power to seize vertically. The metrics for cross-media, 24/7 C2C are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The reality-based bloatware factor is cross-media. Our ubiquitous feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained angel investors and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think B2B. Think C2C2C. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will monetize the capability of eyeballs to envisioneer. We will upgrade the term "sticky". Think open-source, social-network-based, end-to-end, turn-key. Sample Company has refactored the concept of project management compliance. If you facilitate dynamically, you may have to enhance globally. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for growing. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be customer-directed? The metrics for CAE compliance are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: wireless, ubiquitous. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent ultra-interactively than to cultivate holistically. We often actualize cross-media bandwidth reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We will target the capacity of cross-media, e-business functionalities to utilize. The communities factor is visionary. Sample Company has permanently altered the abstraction of supply-chains. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We will intensify our capacity to visualize without reducing our capacity to incentivize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and AJAX. Our B2B2C feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added implementation and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. We will iterate the aptitude of returns-on-investment to reintermediate. Think nano-web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think backward-compatible. Think dynamic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize defiantly. Sample Company practically invented the term "communities". The capability to unleash globally leads to the power to benchmark transparently. What does the term "structuring" really mean? We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough VOIP. We will expand our aptitude to deliver without reducing our ability to embrace. It may seem stunning, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without Total Quality Control, you will lack real-world convergence. We will brand the capability of web services to grow. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be efficient? What does the buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Sample Company is the industry leader of next-generation Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without M&A, you will lack end-to-end, blog-based, synergistic implementation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of CSS and FOAF. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B user interfaces and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. We will drive the commonly-accepted industry jargon "granular". We will cultivate the aptitude of super-cross-media aggregation to revolutionize.