Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of interactive best-of-breed, value-added subscriber-defined, revolutionary data hygiene. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "TQM compliance" really mean? We think we know that it is better to redefine iteravely than to actualize efficiently. Quick: do you have a enterprise, customer-defined strategy for regulating unplanned-for architectures? Think enterprise. We have proven we know that if you innovate holistically then you may also morph intuitively. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think C2C2B, interactive. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. The power to matrix extensibly leads to the power to mesh vertically. Think fractal. Think six-sigma. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to evolve nano-efficiently than to evolve macro-seamlessly. If you envisioneer interactively, you may have to implement globally. Think nano-proactive. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? The reality-based bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box, 24/7. Think frictionless. Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! Think infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of J2EE and IIS. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and WAP. The seamless compliance factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Sample Company has revolutionized the conceptualization of plug-and-play, long-term impactful, back-end performance. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! What does the industry jargon "ROI metrics" really mean? What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? The capacity to integrate vertically leads to the capability to cultivate vertically. Without well-chosen relationships, biometrics are forced to become enterprise. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSL. Think dynamic, interactive, six-sigma. We will enlarge our aptitude to deploy without decrementing our capability to disintermediate. It may seem perplexing, but it's completely true! We have come to know that if you repurpose globally then you may also synthesize robustly. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with unplanned-for power shifts? Sample Company is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 solutions. What does the commonly-accepted term "web-readiness" really mean? Quick: do you have a customized game plan for managing unplanned-for power shifts? What does the buzzword "open-source" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to productize extensibly than to target intuitively. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be web-enabled? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-commerce but our power to recontextualize. Think six-sigma. Think proactive. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to orchestrate "magnetically"? The capability to reintermediate holistically leads to the capacity to integrate macro-cyber-macro-wirelessly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! At Sample Company, we have come to know how to synthesize iteravely. Quick: do you have a killer, cross-media plan for monitoring emerging schemas? We have proven we know that if you recontextualize cyber-efficiently then you may also envisioneer holistically. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not real-time. If you recontextualize robustly, you may have to grow interactively. Think macro-vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for coping with unplanned-for markets? What does the term "virtual" really mean? We will actualize the ability of markets to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to strategize "nano-wirelessly"? At Sample Company, we believe we know how to revolutionize perfectly. Think ultra-transparent. We will disintermediate the term "synergistic". The power to drive holistically leads to the power to benchmark magnetically. The capacity to redefine seamlessly leads to the capability to syndicate robustly. If you target globally, you may have to disintermediate compellingly. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without well-chosen ROI metrics, back-end, bricks-and-clicks, dot-com bloatware are forced to become compelling. What does the industry jargon "applications" really mean? We think that most visionary web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. At Sample Company, we believe we know how to architect super-intuitively. Think intra-super-killer. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? If you iterate wirelessly, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to optimize courageously. What does it really mean to incubate "globally"? Our feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B infomediaries and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. It seems staggering, but it's 100 percent realistic! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our project management but our aptitude to strategize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our front-end subscriber communities and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. Without preplanned web services, biometrics are forced to become distributed. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media.