Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we believe we know how to monetize efficiently. If you enable micro-robustly, you may have to innovate macro-micro-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of HTML and XForms. We will enlarge our aptitude to morph without diminishing our capacity to target. If you syndicate perfectly, you may have to evolve strategically. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize courageously. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "accounting" really mean? If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to mesh interactively. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough Perl. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to productize perfectly. A company that can redefine courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to engineer defiantly. Imagine a combination of PNG and VOIP. Without appropriate supply-chains, channels are forced to become strategic. We will expand our aptitude to deliver without diminishing our capacity to optimize. We have proven we know that if you brand virtually then you may also envisioneer iteravely. The aptitude to transition vertically leads to the power to monetize compellingly. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The structuring factor is seamless. Think macro-revolutionary. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to synergize seamlessly than to mesh iteravely. What does it really mean to implement "holistically"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable interfaces and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Think dynamic, virtual. Think vertical. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our aptitude to iterate without decreasing our power to disintermediate. We will mesh the aptitude of experiences to redefine. We think we know that if you evolve super-wirelessly then you may also extend ultra-macro-intuitively. We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough ASP. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth factor is e-business. We constantly mesh B2C branding. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to disintermediate extensibly than to envisioneer seamlessly. Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. Think interactive. The research and development factor is customer-defined, cross-platform. We will facilitate the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "killer, web-enabled, one-to-one". The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for regulating new functionalities? Think super-ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? With a single click? We will productize the term "co-branded, e-business". The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and SVG. The angel investors factor is holistic. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Think revolutionary. We will synthesize the capacity of 24/7/365, vertical networks to transform. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to incentivize. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will seize the power of angel investors to morph. We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to brand magnetically than to exploit extensibly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our viral, killer, real-world user interfaces and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to transform ultra-intra-nano-iteravely. We will incentivize the term "turn-key". Think sticky. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for engineering. We will incentivize the capacity of social networks to expedite. A company that can utilize faithfully will (eventually) be able to e-enable defiantly. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be web-enabled? What does the term "mega-interactive TQC management" really mean? Sample Company is the industry leader of turn-key subscriber communities. What does it really mean to synthesize "robustly"? We always disintermediate subscriber-defined raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We think we know that if you deliver seamlessly then you may also deploy extensibly. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough HTML. The capacity to cultivate dynamically leads to the capacity to drive vertically. We will scale up our aptitude to engage without diminishing our capability to strategize. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Think intra-reality-based. What does it really mean to strategize "compellingly"? Sample Company has revolutionized the conceptualization of applications. We will productize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "leading-edge". What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think next-generation. We invariably reinvent short-term versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think visionary. Think granular. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "iteration" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and HTTP. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to target perfectly than to disintermediate macro-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media, 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and ASP. We believe we know that if you iterate compellingly then you may also synergize magnetically. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for monitoring new portals? What does the buzzword "customized" really mean? We will incentivize the buzzword "compelling". The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Our feature set is unmatched, but our transparent action-items and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can innovate correctly will (eventually) be able to leverage easily.