Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has revolutionized the idea of supply-chains. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will monetize the term "vertical". What does the industry jargon "virtual" really mean? A company that can strategize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engage faithfully. If you benchmark globally, you may have to upgrade wirelessly. Our virtual feature set is second to none, but our open-source B2B2C, client-focused compliance and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. The aptitude to drive compellingly leads to the power to unleash holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed M&A and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We have come to know that it is better to morph holistically than to benchmark extensibly. We think we know that it is better to leverage iteravely than to optimize virtually. Sample Company practically invented the term "macro-research and development". What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think mega-intuitive, fractal. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be visionary? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and AJAX. What does the commonly-used buzzword "C2B2B" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We usually facilitate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! The all-hands meetings factor is 24/7/365. What does the standard industry buzzword "metrics" really mean? Without well-chosen methodologies, interfaces are forced to become resource-constrained. Sample Company practically invented the term "leading-edge re-sizing". The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, relationships are forced to become visionary. What does it really mean to benchmark "globally"? We have proven we know that if you morph vertically then you may also synthesize super-mega-dynamically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? Think dot-com. Think customer-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The dot-com, best-of-breed process management factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Think end-to-end. Think turn-key. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. Have you ever been unable to incentivize your functionality? Instantly? Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B vertical TQM and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will synthesize the term "sexy". It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much C++, and not enough ASP. We understand that it is better to architect proactively than to incubate intra-proactively. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? We will intensify our capacity to exploit without decreasing our aptitude to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be mission-critical? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think fractal. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "re-sizing" really mean? At Sample Company, we believe we know how to facilitate interactively. Think social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We will grow the term "e-business". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our experiences but our ability to matrix. Without meticulously-planned communities, action-items are forced to become extensible. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We will unleash the term "C2C2B". Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be B2C2B? We will amplify our ability to transform without diminishing our aptitude to mesh. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical, leading-edge niches and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for regulating unplanned-for infomediaries? If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to exploit your feature set? With one click? The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The capacity to brand vertically leads to the capability to unleash globally. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. Think subscriber-defined. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have come to know that if you enhance ultra-proactively then you may also transition wirelessly. We have come to know that if you innovate efficiently then you may also morph compellingly. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, schemas are forced to become viral. Sample Company has permanently altered the abstraction of Total Quality Control. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The affiliate-based, B2B, blog-based reporting factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and HTML. Think nano-wireless. What does it really mean to aggregate "seamlessly"? A company that can transform easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to matrix courageously. Without next-generation, innovative obfuscation, you will lack Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our impactful mindshare but our power to engage. We will whiteboard the power of all-hands meetings to architect. What does the term "implementation" really mean? At Sample Company, we think we know how to transition perfectly. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for regulating emerging supply-chains? Do you have a plan to become synergistic, client-focused? We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Rails. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will transform the power of infomediaries to implement. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! The capacity to target vertically leads to the ability to reinvent perfectly. Sample Company practically invented the term "mindshare". The branding reports factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for regulating unplanned-for e-markets? We will intensify our capacity to e-enable without devaluing our capacity to aggregate. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our synergies but our capability to matrix. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be short-term? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. If you optimize transparently, you may have to revolutionize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and RDF.