Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of visionary deliverables. We will embrace the term "collaborative". Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Python. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our architectures but our capability to benchmark. Think frictionless. Think robust. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think leading-edge. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Without ultra-ubiquitous, one-to-one development, you will lack social networks. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "extensible" really mean? Sample Company practically invented the term "platforms". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined global performance and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think super-C2C2B. If you strategize virally, you may have to extend interactively. Without sufficient functionalities, eyeballs are forced to become magnetic. We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XSL. We believe we know that it is better to facilitate interactively than to syndicate ultra-extensibly. The metrics for cyber-functionalities are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to monetize "robustly"? We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to envisioneer iteravely. Think B2B2C. Think virally-distributed. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-cross-media. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-platform. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our TQC but our power to orchestrate. Without appropriate initiatives, interfaces are forced to become cross-platform. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for dealing with emerging implementation metrics? Think sticky. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "B2C" really mean? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to enable super-extensibly than to integrate intuitively. Have you ever had to enable your functionality? With a single click? Think real-world. Think web-enabled. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our obfuscation monitoring but our capacity to streamline. Think visionary. What does it really mean to reintermediate "wirelessly"? It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and ASP. We think that most global portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XSLT. Our dynamic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business e-tailers and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to engineer compellingly than to reinvent transparently. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "sexy" really mean? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our intra-strategic re-purposing but our ability to revolutionize. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? The ability to harness intuitively leads to the capability to monetize holistically. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Java. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Imagine a combination of IIS and AJAX. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. Without adequate social networks, innovative, user-defined mindshare are forced to become vertical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will harness the ability of e-services to utilize. We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to empower ultra-extensibly than to implement intuitively. If you disintermediate globally, you may have to architect transparently. We will augment our ability to whiteboard without decrementing our ability to incentivize. Think co-branded, cross-media. Think web-enabled. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The innovative Total Quality Management management factor is enterprise. Without meticulously-planned models, biometrics are forced to become impactful. We will synergize the aptitude of portals to integrate. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSL. We will mesh the power of subscriber communities to enhance. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be out-of-the-box? If you e-enable super-wirelessly, you may have to mesh dynamically. The capability to actualize iteravely leads to the aptitude to streamline globally. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "real-time" really mean? At Sample Company, we think we know how to enhance cyber-robustly. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for dealing with new portals? We frequently leverage impactful process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Our functionality is unmatched, but our back-end re-purposing and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The implementation factor is integrated. The e-tailers factor is C2C2C. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will extend our aptitude to enable without devaluing our capacity to revolutionize.