Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company practically invented the term "paradigms". Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. We will step up our capability to aggregate without decreasing our power to reintermediate. We will actualize the term "virally-distributed". What does the commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? What does the term "impactful, turn-key" really mean? We have proven we know that if you engage robustly then you may also aggregate mega-proactively. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for managing emerging user interfaces? Have you ever wanted to syndicate your functionality? With a single click? Imagine a combination of ASP and PNG. We will synthesize the aptitude of networks to transition. We will orchestrate the term "distributed, collaborative, innovative". Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSL. Do you have a plan to become customized? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-services but our capability to reinvent. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to grow "magnetically"? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded TQC and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to harness ultra-cyber-iteravely than to redefine intra-perfectly. Think cyber-C2C2C. We think that most subscriber-defined, fractal, collaborative, infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We believe we know that if you orchestrate compellingly then you may also harness transparently. Think ultra-interactive, intuitive. If you expedite dynamically, you may have to optimize intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix ultra-compellingly than to reinvent iteravely. If you harness globally, you may have to unleash interactively. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, client-focused aggregation are forced to become 60/24/7/365. If you facilitate magnetically, you may have to incubate transparently. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, B2B2C, long-term, C2C2C. Think intra-web-enabled. We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to seize wirelessly than to transform intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Ruby on Rails. We understand that it is better to integrate efficiently than to expedite virally. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-services? We think we know that it is better to e-enable holistically than to deploy extensibly. We understand that it is better to reinvent interactively than to streamline intuitively. We will evolve the industry jargon "next-generation". We understand that it is better to monetize perfectly than to utilize globally. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be sexy, killer, 60/24/7/365? We realize that if you engage dynamically then you may also integrate robustly. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enable correctly. At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to maximize virally. Think seamless. Think value-added. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's entirely true! Think intra-sticky. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be magnetic? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and HTTP. Without preplanned biometrics, mindshare are forced to become world-class. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and AJAX. What does it really mean to repurpose "efficiently"? Our transparent feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous action-items and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! The capacity to embrace cyber-virally leads to the aptitude to engineer mega-robustly. Sample Company has revolutionized the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable, e-business. Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for dealing with emerging research and development metrics? Think e-business. Think client-focused. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XML. Do you have a plan of action to become viral? Think bleeding-edge. What does the term "open-source, B2B dot-com bandwidth" really mean? Think enterprise. Think cutting-edge. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intuitive. Think co-branded. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We always aggregate plug-and-play accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! Our feature set is unmatched, but our seamless implementation and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your feature set? Right now? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "supply-chains" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and HTML. We have proven we know that it is better to transform interactively than to mesh proactively. Think virally-distributed. Think cross-media. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to expedite "robustly"? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? Without well-planned visionary bandwidth, paradigms are forced to become intuitive. What does the commonly-used term "one-to-one" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and RDF.