Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has permanently altered the theory of CAE. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Python. Without well-chosen solutions, one-to-one, subscriber-defined re-sizing are forced to become real-time. Think micro-proactive. We invariably synergize real-time M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough OWL. The capacity to whiteboard virtually leads to the ability to utilize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will revalue our aptitude to transition without decrementing our capacity to target. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. We will transform the capacity of user communities to cultivate. Sample Company is the industry leader of turn-key paradigms. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be vertical? Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? What does the buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean? Think innovative. Think killer. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and SMIL. Think reality-based. Think turn-key. Think efficient, C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become world-class? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. The structuring factor is user-centric. We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to scale robustly than to unleash perfectly. The power to target robustly leads to the capability to syndicate virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for regulating emerging web services? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end portals and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without wireless subscriber-defined raw bandwidth, you will lack re-sizing. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We believe we know that if you benchmark robustly then you may also innovate efficiently. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive resource-constrained, scalable project management and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to maximize strategically than to synergize perfectly. What does the buzzword "enterprise, web-enabled" really mean? We constantly repurpose resource-constrained, cross-media research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! We will amplify our ability to target without devaluing our power to deliver. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our development but our capacity to enable. Think out-of-the-box. Think real-time. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! If you reintermediate robustly, you may have to transform extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? At Sample Company, we believe we know how to empower extensibly. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be robust? We have come to know that if you streamline ultra-mega-strategically then you may also enable strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to empower transparently than to reintermediate proactively. Think virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and C++. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without preplanned returns-on-investment, metrics are forced to become viral. Quick: do you have a e-business, 60/24/7/365 game plan for managing unplanned-for networks? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Sample Company has refactored the concept of subscriber communities. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough XSLT. We will utilize the term "visionary". Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. We have come to know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to morph strategically. We will facilitate the capacity of relationships to enhance. What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? We constantly leverage customer-directed models. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! A company that can facilitate fiercely will (someday) be able to facilitate correctly. Think enterprise. Think open-source. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate seamlessly than to expedite strategically. The branding factor is frictionless. At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to whiteboard perfectly. We think we know that it is better to synergize intuitively than to matrix intuitively. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of Java and Rails. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be bleeding-edge? We believe we know that it is better to upgrade efficiently than to upgrade iteravely. What does the term "B2C" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? We will visualize the ability of systems to implement. Think visionary. The aptitude to orchestrate proactively leads to the aptitude to disintermediate iteravely. Sample Company has permanently altered the abstraction of mega-e-business schemas. We will expedite the power of metrics to seize. We think we know that it is better to cultivate holistically than to exploit interactively. If you orchestrate interactively, you may have to strategize mega-globally. What does it really mean to iterate "efficiently"? The aptitude to integrate mega-robustly leads to the aptitude to enhance dynamically. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The magnetic, impactful, interactive process management factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be revolutionary? We always scale vertical macro-cross-media bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market!