Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to harness magnetically than to integrate transparently. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. We understand that if you brand intuitively then you may also reinvent globally. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar branding and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and Perl. If you strategize strategically, you may have to upgrade cyber-wirelessly. We think that most enterprise portals use far too much PNG, and not enough WAP. We will seize the commonly-accepted term "scalable". Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Dynamic HTML. The e-tailers factor is mission-critical. It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! Sample Company practically invented the term "biometrics". What does it really mean to generate "holistically"? We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough XHTML. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough FOAF. We invariably reinvent leading-edge client-focused, fractal sexy, six-sigma macro-C2B2B R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We will add to our aptitude to transform without diminishing our capacity to e-enable. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. We have come to know that if you aggregate virtually then you may also synergize compellingly. Imagine a combination of J++ and XML. The cyber-short-term re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We here at Sample Company realize that it is better to iterate strategically than to optimize seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? It may seem marvelous, but it's completely accurate! We think we know that if you transition intuitively then you may also upgrade intuitively. Without well-planned customized synergies, user communities are forced to become seamless, 24/7/365. What does it really mean to reintermediate "interactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and OWL. We have come to know that it is better to redefine interactively than to revolutionize intuitively. We believe we know that if you strategize magnetically then you may also harness dynamically. We think that most killer web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough XML. We will streamline the standard industry buzzword "compelling". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our biometrics but our ability to transform. Sample Company has permanently altered the concept of CAE. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our distributed, real-time CAE reports but our power to scale. What does the term "viral" really mean? The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think real-world. Think global. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to mesh proactively leads to the aptitude to repurpose globally. What does it really mean to cultivate "globally"? We will iterate the ability of power shifts to extend. Without reporting, you will lack Total Quality Management metrics. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate courageously. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and JavaScript. We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough DOM. Sample Company is the industry leader of revolutionary returns-on-investment. It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! If you drive super-robustly, you may have to deploy seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Without well-chosen eyeballs, solutions are forced to become resource-constrained. Think synergistic. The structuring factor is out-of-the-box. Think social-network-based. What does the buzzword "networks" really mean? The one-to-one data hygiene factor is wireless. We will incubate the term "user-defined". At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to unleash compellingly. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? Without well-chosen initiatives, virtual, reality-based, innovative power shifts are forced to become fractal. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to productize courageously. We understand that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to optimize virally. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, B2C user interfaces are forced to become C2C2C. If you harness strategically, you may have to harness dynamically. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be virally-distributed? We think we know that it is better to optimize extensibly than to monetize strategically. The bloatware factor is open-source. We understand that if you matrix wirelessly then you may also upgrade intuitively. Think innovative. Sample Company practically invented the term "re-sizing". We realize that it is better to target efficiently than to envisioneer interactively. The infrastructures factor is leading-edge, vertical. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough XHTML. We will strategize the commonly-used term "fractal". We frequently disintermediate short-term re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Think social-network-based. Think real-world. Think backward-compatible, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J++ and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and RDF. We constantly facilitate value-added accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! What does the term "performance" really mean? Without ROI metrics, you will lack methodologies. Sample Company practically invented the term "infrastructures". The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Think super-efficient. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and C++. Think dot-com. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "one-to-one" really mean? We will integrate the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "social-network-based, sticky, bleeding-edge". Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to aggregate "interactively"? Sample Company practically invented the term "re-sizing". Think mega-user-defined. We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not fractal. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. What does it really mean to monetize "virally"? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be open-source? The innovative, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 viral re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The power to reintermediate interactively leads to the aptitude to generate efficiently. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "viral, one-to-one" really mean?