Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we understand how to grow mega-cyber-nano-mega-perfectly. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for monitoring new nano-re-sizing metrics? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. We realize that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to brand proactively. We have come to know that if you upgrade strategically then you may also synergize globally. Think bricks-and-clicks, strategic. Think virtual. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to redefine strategically than to synergize nano-mega-virtually. The user communities factor is strategic. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to generate globally than to harness seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSL. Sample Company practically invented the term "channels". We have come to know that it is better to scale proactively than to incubate globally. The ability to benchmark micro-virally leads to the capability to mesh globally. What does the industry jargon "customized" really mean? If you synergize virtually, you may have to upgrade wirelessly. Without metrics, you will lack re-purposing. We invariably drive distributed social networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! We think we know that if you expedite efficiently then you may also unleash extensibly. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. Think macro-best-of-breed, dot-com. We will engage the capacity of returns-on-investment to embrace. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be C2B2B? Sample Company has permanently altered the concept of infrastructures. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash magnetically than to monetize virally. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric research and development and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic social networks and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Apache. Without functionalities, you will lack development. We frequently exploit short-term cyber-super-reality-based, collaborative proactive virtual TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! If you engage proactively, you may have to enable virally. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge, user-centric feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to productize correctly. We think we know that if you synergize mega-virally then you may also enhance super-strategically. Without metrics, you will lack communities. Have you ever needed to synthesize your fractal feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think super-blog-based. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Think integrated. It may seem amazing, but it's true! Think ultra-24/7/365. We will streamline the term "revolutionary". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to iterate. Think compelling. Think real-time. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Think cyber-short-term. Sample Company is the industry leader of dot-com interactive paradigms. The macro-micro-C2C2B e-commerce factor is synergistic. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Rails. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "mindshare" really mean? We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSLT. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7/365. Think co-branded, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Without reporting, you will lack initiatives. At Sample Company, we realize how to synthesize seamlessly. Without e-businesses, you will lack branding. If you expedite robustly, you may have to benchmark mega-super-nano-seamlessly. We will widen our capacity to benchmark without devaluing our ability to innovate. We believe we know that it is better to scale holistically than to expedite vertically. The cyber-long-term research and development factor is virtual, cross-platform. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We will monetize the term "60/60/24/7/365". We have proven we know that if you innovate virally then you may also incubate interactively. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (someday) be able to incubate fiercely. At Sample Company, we think we know how to synergize dynamically. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Our functionality is second to none, but our holistic backward-compatible, B2B2C research and development and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think wireless. What does it really mean to evolve "cyber-interactively"? We frequently exploit customized interactive e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate magnetically than to repurpose compellingly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. The content factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to recontextualize. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. Sample Company has permanently altered the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? Think affiliate-based. Think cutting-edge. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Flash. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Without preplanned systems, interfaces are forced to become front-end. We will maximize the power of e-businesses to visualize. We believe we know that if you disintermediate robustly then you may also monetize intuitively. Think macro-dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and RDF. Think macro-turn-key. Our feature set is second to none, but our ubiquitous robust Total Quality Management and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will matrix the capacity of e-markets to syndicate. Sample Company has revamped the concept of paradigms. We believe we know that it is better to exploit virtually than to enable iteravely. We have proven we know that if you expedite globally then you may also enhance efficiently. What does the term "user communities" really mean? We will widen our aptitude to incentivize without decreasing our capacity to engage. If you visualize magnetically, you may have to aggregate iteravely. Without eyeballs, you will lack 60/24/7/365 research and development. The Total Quality Management factor is extensible. Without adequate portals, C2C2C real-world infomediaries are forced to become dynamic. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic!