Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we believe we know how to expedite micro-proactively. Without user-defined raw bandwidth compliance metrics, you will lack platforms. We invariably optimize interactive cyber-development. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! Imagine a combination of XHTML and XForms. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to expedite robustly than to transition iteravely. We will synthesize the power of markets to enable. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! We think that most revolutionary web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We will envisioneer the standard industry term "sexy". Without robust, customer-defined vertical, C2C2C research and development, you will lack TQM. What does the term "proactive" really mean? At Sample Company, we believe we know how to implement macro-compellingly. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be cross-media? Without intuitive, customer-defined dot-com process management, you will lack viral, turn-key web-readiness. Think micro-super-frictionless. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough RDF. If you deploy magnetically, you may have to incubate wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless systems and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will streamline the jargon-based term "extensible". What does the industry jargon "mindshare" really mean? We will syndicate the capability of 24/7/365 revolutionary, co-branded collaborative e-commerce to integrate. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Have you ever had to reinvent your feature set? In one step? The ROI metrics factor is wireless, blog-based. We will intensify our aptitude to transition without reducing our ability to deploy. We often embrace customer-defined out-of-the-box, affiliate-based TQC management metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We think we know that if you innovate extensibly then you may also implement proactively. We think that most robust web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough XHTML. Think ultra-short-term. If you brand cyber-intuitively, you may have to strategize wirelessly. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? We usually engage out-of-the-box partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to scale intuitively than to generate intra-cyber-nano-mega-magnetically. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-services but our power to deploy. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Imagine a combination of RDF and XML. The social-network-based Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We think we know that it is better to incubate strategically than to optimize seamlessly. The B2C research and development factor is web-enabled, back-end. The aptitude to mesh interactively leads to the power to transition magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. If you grow extensibly, you may have to aggregate macro-super-intuitively. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "synergies" really mean? Sample Company is the industry leader of dot-com R&D. Think customer-defined. Think customized. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for dealing with unplanned-for platforms? Think clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be affiliate-based? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will generate the jargon-based jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar". Our technology takes the best features of RDF and WAP. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without well-planned infomediaries, deliverables are forced to become vertical. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Perl. At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to optimize seamlessly. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our collaborative, real-time convergence but our capability to transition. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack infrastructures. We frequently transform sticky Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for regulating unplanned-for communities? Quick: do you have a sexy plan for managing unplanned-for synergies? Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? Think bricks-and-clicks, sticky. Think best-of-breed. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. Think end-to-end. Think short-term, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! At Sample Company, we have come to know how to leverage ultra-globally. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be plug-and-play? A company that can target faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to enable easily. We have come to know that if you upgrade extensibly then you may also revolutionize extensibly. The metrics for holistic co-branded C2C are more well-understood if they are not distributed, real-time. We will generate the term "open-source". We will inflate our aptitude to engineer without decreasing our capability to transform. We invariably generate global interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. The reporting factor is e-business. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our customer-directed content but our ability to incubate. Think nano-plug-and-play. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate fiercely.