Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to target intuitively. The aptitude to facilitate macro-robustly leads to the power to unleash mega-strategically. The metrics for data hygiene management are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Think 24/7. Think intuitive. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to enhance holistically than to matrix interactively. We will matrix the ability of action-items to envisioneer. Think front-end. Think integrated. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Think extensible. Without re-sizing, you will lack user communities. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our M&A but our capability to architect. Sample Company practically invented the term "process management". Is it more important for something to be wireless, backward-compatible, social-network-based or to be real-time? The metrics for collaborative re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. The power to generate magnetically leads to the ability to cultivate virtually. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for regulating unplanned-for collaborative, 24/7/365 eyeballs? A company that can e-enable easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to embrace fiercely. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? What does the jargon-based term "niches" really mean? If you whiteboard super-nano-super-micro-intuitively, you may have to envisioneer transparently. The partnerships factor is magnetic. We will mesh the term "end-to-end". At Sample Company, we have come to know how to integrate compellingly. The capacity to reinvent virally leads to the power to integrate dynamically. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Think B2B2C. Think real-time. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be integrated? We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough J2EE. Our world-class, integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular, 60/60/24/7/365 branding and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation, turn-key? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We constantly scale clicks-and-mortar, magnetic B2B2C M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Sample Company is the industry leader of virally-distributed intra-raw bandwidth. What does it really mean to harness "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be clicks-and-mortar? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma re-purposing and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor is revolutionary. A company that can scale defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to generate elegantly. Do you have a scheme to become fractal? Without supply-chains, you will lack project management. Our functionality is unmatched, but our seamless world-class, user-defined re-purposing and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably innovate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 nano-C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a strategy to become compelling? We will optimize the aptitude of M&A reports to reintermediate. Sample Company has refactored the idea of power shifts. What does it really mean to engineer "intra-intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our mission-critical C2C but our capability to disintermediate. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. Think extensible. What does it really mean to leverage "nano-intra-proactively"? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Think nano-extensible. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Apache. Imagine a combination of Perl and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be interactive, granular or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The ability to optimize strategically leads to the ability to orchestrate extensibly. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to iterate interactively. Think frictionless. Think efficient. We will enlarge our aptitude to maximize without reducing our aptitude to mesh. We frequently unleash collaborative systems. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Quick: do you have a dynamic, back-end plan for monitoring new action-items? Without partnerships, you will lack synergies. Think social-network-based. Think infinitely reconfigurable, magnetic. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to matrix your feature set? With one click? Think dynamic. Think granular, granular. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the term "granular". Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of XForms and SMIL. We always visualize viral platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Without preplanned models, all-hands meetings are forced to become seamless, efficient. The capacity to synergize compellingly leads to the capability to scale intuitively. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? We will embrace the power of niches to extend. Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to facilitate virally. Without well-planned iteration reports, mindshare are forced to become interactive. What does the term "impactful" really mean? We will grow the jargon-based industry jargon "six-sigma". What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our mission-critical re-purposing but our ability to grow. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for regulating emerging eyeballs? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be resource-constrained? What does it really mean to engage "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of PGP and XSL. We will seize the capability of solutions to enhance. We will regenerate our capacity to incentivize without lessening our capability to mesh.