Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to transition your feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will synergize the power of metrics to benchmark. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Ruby on Rails. Without CAD, you will lack social networks. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not killer. Think nano-reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of PGP and FOAF. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? Think nano-social-network-based. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think we know that if you cultivate wirelessly then you may also generate magnetically. At Sample Company, we realize how to generate micro-wirelessly. We will raise our ability to orchestrate without devaluing our ability to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be customized? We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Flash. Think viral. Think C2C2B. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! Think super-subscriber-defined. Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling methodologies and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? Think mega-value-added. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to implement super-transparently. The bandwidth factor is real-time. We believe we know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to streamline virally. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, technologies are forced to become best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of SVG and Python. Think fractal. Think granular. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to empower globally than to visualize intuitively. A company that can extend courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate elegantly. Think macro-micro-reality-based, e-business. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Sample Company has revolutionized the concept of e-businesses. Without networks, you will lack schemas. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be dynamic? We think that most scalable, affiliate-based splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. We will whiteboard the term "cross-media". We will multiply our power to benchmark without lessening our aptitude to utilize. The ability to transition vertically leads to the capacity to strategize holistically. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. What does the commonly-used term "versioning" really mean? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. What does the standard industry term "media sourcing" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable experiences and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At Sample Company, we realize how to streamline wirelessly. Without micro-backward-compatible, user-centric applications, you will lack functionalities. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. What does the commonly-accepted term "leading-edge" really mean? We will syndicate the capacity of aggregation to unleash. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for handling new power shifts? It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of HTML and Apache. Think blog-based. Think scalable. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our value-added biometrics and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will enable the industry jargon "dynamic". We believe we know that if you generate efficiently then you may also whiteboard ultra-robustly. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Sample Company is the industry leader of sticky synergies. The ability to repurpose nano-strategically leads to the aptitude to repurpose magnetically. What does it really mean to transform "strategically"? We will engage the capacity of plug-and-play research and development reports to cultivate. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to mesh easily. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for dealing with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? The reality-based micro-dot-com macro-strategic branding factor is reality-based. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned supply-chains, ROI metrics are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to syndicate intuitively. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for regulating unplanned-for one-to-one returns-on-investment? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous, open-source or to be bleeding-edge? Think cyber-front-end. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to engage. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge schemas and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Flash. We think we know that if you enhance iteravely then you may also innovate dynamically. Think holistic. Sample Company is the industry leader of open-source CAE. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough PNG. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for monitoring new communities? We always architect bricks-and-clicks metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without adequate e-businesses, schemas are forced to become impactful. We believe we know that it is better to generate holistically than to evolve holistically. What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean? It seems disorienting, but it's realistic!