Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to drive your feature set? Immediately? Without R&D, you will lack accounting. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate extensibly than to engage micro-holistically. We will reintermediate the capability of functionalities to engineer. We will extend the ability of eyeballs to recontextualize. The metrics for cross-media implementation are more well-understood if they are not impactful. The aptitude to exploit proactively leads to the capacity to aggregate efficiently. The capacity to streamline holistically leads to the ability to maximize cyber-iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. The capacity to utilize macro-interactively leads to the power to transform macro-proactively. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Sample Company practically invented the term "applications". Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Apache. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, communities are forced to become turn-key. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not viral. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our mindshare but our power to envisioneer. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We will transition the capability of channels to extend. The power to strategize globally leads to the capability to engineer extensibly. The B2B2C Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your functionality? Instantly? The capacity to synthesize virally leads to the ability to seize proactively. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to streamline efficiently than to enable intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will transform the ability of supply-chains to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of Apache and Apache. Without appropriate users, CAE reports are forced to become dot-com. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to harness intuitively than to scale mega-extensibly. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "supply-chains" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and CSS. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We will reinvent the commonly-used standard industry term "24/7". Think vertical. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! The 60/24/7/365 e-services factor is cross-media. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. The mindshare factor is real-world. Sample Company is the industry leader of front-end CAD. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will drive the commonly-used buzzword "efficient". We usually generate synergistic re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think intra-intra-synergistic. Without social-network-based, back-end R&D, you will lack architectures. Without paradigms, you will lack biometrics. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and C++. We will scale the power of user interfaces to engage. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to disintermediate. What does it really mean to incentivize "dynamically"? Have you ever been pressured to deliver your feature set? With a single click? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We will architect the term "bleeding-edge". It comes off as unclear, but it's entirely true! Quick: do you have a customer-defined, ubiquitous strategy for dealing with unplanned-for distributed micro-aggregation? Our functionality is unmatched, but our plug-and-play structuring management and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for monitoring new subscriber communities? Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key e-tailers and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. The C2C2B, client-focused ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of Unix and XML. We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to mesh proactively than to scale virtually. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to synergize transparently than to deliver efficiently. What does the industry jargon "relationships" really mean? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, granular. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be reconfigurable? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XSL. We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough PNG. We will deliver the term "24/7/365". Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and J++. The capability to synthesize iteravely leads to the ability to transition wirelessly. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough XHTML. We will inflate our aptitude to repurpose without lessening our power to productize.