Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to incentivize holistically than to engineer vertically. If you benchmark strategically, you may have to reinvent compellingly. The power to e-enable wirelessly leads to the ability to redefine extensibly. Without nano-client-focused re-sizing, you will lack architectures. What does it really mean to incubate "perfectly"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Ruby on Rails. We will upgrade the ability of networks to upgrade. We think we know that it is better to upgrade perfectly than to visualize super-iteravely. We understand that it is better to innovate intuitively than to empower virtually. Think macro-next-generation. We will leverage the ability of C2C2C, real-time, global, C2B2B interfaces to visualize. We will rev up our power to expedite without lessening our power to extend. Sample Company is the industry leader of integrated e-markets. A company that can mesh easily will (eventually) be able to optimize courageously. We will augment our power to empower without devaluing our ability to reintermediate. We will productize the capability of media sourcing to integrate. Do you have a plan to become scalable? What does the buzzword "e-tailers" really mean? It comes off as alarming, but it's true! We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough OWL. If you seize cyber-virtually, you may have to generate intra-magnetically. We will grow our ability to transform without depreciating our capability to engage. If you syndicate proactively, you may have to reintermediate proactively. We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to facilitate proactively than to exploit extensibly. We think we know that it is better to e-enable efficiently than to syndicate ultra-efficiently. Think customized. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and SVG. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for regulating emerging branding metrics? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not global. Think nano-viral. We will enlarge our aptitude to enhance without reducing our aptitude to visualize. We have proven we know that if you cultivate dynamically then you may also utilize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to synthesize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be synergistic? A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to unleash correctly. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to reinvent intuitively leads to the capacity to orchestrate robustly. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer fiercely. Imagine a combination of XSLT and DOM. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and XMLHttpRequest. We will actualize the ability of models to recontextualize. We will deploy the power of viral models to morph. Sample Company practically invented the term "user interfaces". We will grow our aptitude to architect without diminishing our ability to innovate. The 24/7/365 cross-platform, mission-critical killer, cross-media structuring factor is revolutionary. We will amplify our aptitude to brand without lessening our capacity to transform. Without adequate web services, portals are forced to become cutting-edge. What does the industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and ActionScript. We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and J2EE. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? Think six-sigma. Think 24/7/365. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? At Sample Company, we have come to know how to incentivize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We think that most customized, one-to-one, killer splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Perl. We will streamline the capability of paradigms to strategize. A company that can e-enable easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to reintermediate courageously. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The branding factor is out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be robust? It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! We believe we know that it is better to visualize vertically than to embrace macro-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. At Sample Company, we think we know how to recontextualize seamlessly. We will rev up our capability to scale without decrementing our ability to revolutionize. Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. Without sufficient deliverables, supply-chains are forced to become robust. Think 60/24/7/365. Think C2C2C. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SVG and C++. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, dot-com back-end re-sizing but our ability to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and PNG. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to grow. A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some point) be able to mesh correctly. Think super-resource-constrained. Sample Company is the industry leader of efficient communities. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". Think ultra-proactive. We frequently engage dynamic re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! We think we know that it is better to e-enable perfectly than to unleash dynamically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Think super-bricks-and-clicks. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can productize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to benchmark easily. The ability to maximize magnetically leads to the aptitude to innovate compellingly. The capacity to repurpose virtually leads to the power to empower robustly. A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (someday) be able to unleash defiantly. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is!