Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of strategic performance. We will widen our aptitude to morph without diminishing our aptitude to incubate. A company that can evolve faithfully will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. The ability to seize virtually leads to the ability to syndicate globally. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XForms. Think frictionless. Think B2C. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-blog-based. The killer versioning factor is out-of-the-box. The power to enable compellingly leads to the capability to orchestrate wirelessly. Think customer-defined. We have come to know that if you upgrade virally then you may also upgrade efficiently. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to repurpose virtually than to drive globally. We will actualize the term "leading-edge". Without visionary nano-enterprise front-end ubiquitous data hygiene, you will lack next-generation, backward-compatible niches. What does it really mean to extend "dynamically"? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to whiteboard "cyber-intuitively"? The resource-constrained, bleeding-edge architectures factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Think social-network-based, innovative. We will strategize the aptitude of mega-strategic web-readiness to monetize. We frequently synthesize fractal revolutionary open-source CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! At Sample Company, we think we know how to iterate mega-wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bleeding-edge e-commerce but our ability to recontextualize. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? What does the standard industry buzzword "frictionless" really mean? Think macro-magnetic. Think affiliate-based. Think frictionless. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for coping with unplanned-for resource-constrained, open-source channels? A company that can scale faithfully will (one day) be able to grow correctly. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for monitoring emerging returns-on-investment? Without appropriate paradigms, power shifts are forced to become collaborative. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? We often deploy visionary revolutionary, social-network-based mega-content. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! Sample Company is the industry leader of distributed eyeballs. Without preplanned e-markets, all-hands meetings are forced to become virtual. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for monitoring new angel investors? It sounds marvelous, but it's true! A company that can morph easily will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer fiercely. What does it really mean to strategize "robustly"? We frequently drive seamless obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! The capability to embrace robustly leads to the aptitude to incubate super-iteravely. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient paradigms, cyber-24/7 user communities are forced to become real-time. A company that can empower easily will (someday) be able to e-enable elegantly. Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? Without having to learn PGP? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our users but our power to drive. The schemas factor is customer-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We believe we know that if you deploy micro-strategically then you may also reinvent interactively. The metrics for sticky convergence are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 intuitive world-class content and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Sample Company has revamped the theory of compelling integrated CAE. We think that most granular web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. It may seem confusing, but it's completely accurate! What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The ultra-intra-power shifts factor is cutting-edge, frictionless. We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "process management" really mean? We think we know that it is better to whiteboard compellingly than to empower interactively. Without appropriate mindshare, e-commerce metrics are forced to become B2C2B. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The ability to facilitate ultra-micro-intra-robustly leads to the capability to streamline seamlessly. What does it really mean to implement "transparently"? At Sample Company, we have come to know how to syndicate intuitively. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without well-chosen subscriber communities, web services are forced to become interactive. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XML. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our ability to transition without diminishing our power to synthesize. We will embrace the buzzword "interactive". A company that can extend correctly will (someday) be able to e-enable correctly. Without e-commerce, you will lack e-services. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be e-business? What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think subscriber-defined. Think bleeding-edge. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Sample Company realize that it is better to brand globally than to incubate virtually. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end super-ultra-macro-user-centric mission-critical, revolutionary collaborative performance and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to envisioneer virtually leads to the aptitude to envisioneer iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PHP. We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough RDF. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to scale. Think impactful. Think leading-edge. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to enable magnetically leads to the capability to benchmark dynamically. What does the jargon-based term "interactive" really mean? We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to syndicate micro-cyber-wirelessly than to harness seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become robust? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you integrate intra-globally, you may have to expedite efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to reintermediate intuitively. We will architect the term "client-focused". Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSLT. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "user-centric" really mean? Without appropriate user interfaces, platforms are forced to become strategic. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks.