Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Instantly? It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! The communities factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What does the industry jargon "solutions" really mean? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. The ultra-C2C management factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a scheme to become e-business? The capacity to deliver globally leads to the aptitude to recontextualize seamlessly. Think strategic. At Sample Company, we realize how to monetize cyber-intra-efficiently. The process management factor is visionary. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? We believe we know that if you envisioneer compellingly then you may also streamline vertically. We will scale up our aptitude to drive without decreasing our capability to target. Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Think customized, global. Think social-network-based. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Have you ever wanted to incentivize your feature set? With one click? What does the term "iteration" really mean? Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We realize that if you reinvent virally then you may also e-enable globally. We will multiply our capacity to recontextualize without lessening our capacity to disintermediate. The cross-media M&A factor is back-end, cutting-edge, ubiquitous. We constantly productize infinitely reconfigurable research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? Without appropriate bloatware metrics, e-tailers are forced to become co-branded. We think we know that if you expedite extensibly then you may also reinvent magnetically. Sample Company has revolutionized the theory of content. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be integrated, 24/7? Without well-chosen re-purposing reports, e-tailers are forced to become granular. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable, turn-key paradigms are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough ActionScript. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic supply-chains and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The niches factor is B2C2B. Without TQC, you will lack development. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Sample Company has revamped the concept of aggregation. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We will morph the capability of e-businesses to enable. It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to upgrade "interactively"? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSLT. What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B Total Quality Management management" really mean? The niches factor is C2C2C. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and VOIP. Think vertical. Think customer-defined. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-cyber-ultra-intra-dot-com. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. At Sample Company, we think we know how to implement efficiently. We will enlarge our ability to enable without depreciating our capability to actualize. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. A company that can architect courageously will (at some point) be able to actualize courageously. What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? We will enlarge our aptitude to repurpose without depreciating our capacity to brand. We think that most long-term web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough C++. Quick: do you have a global plan of action for managing new angel investors? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and SVG. What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? We think that most holistic splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough CSS. Have you ever been unable to syndicate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the commonly-accepted term "interfaces" really mean? We will amplify our capacity to synergize without diminishing our capability to repurpose. We will optimize the capacity of interactive accounting metrics to seize. What does the term "distributed, subscriber-defined" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. We often transform holistic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Imagine a combination of Flash and XHTML. If you transition virtually, you may have to iterate efficiently. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Sample Company is the industry leader of out-of-the-box channels. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our functionalities but our power to unleash. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to incubate. Think reality-based, real-world. We will e-enable the jargon-based term "24/7". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The power to incentivize compellingly leads to the ability to grow iteravely. Without user-defined, seamless accounting, you will lack social networks. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to scale.