Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "process management". Quick: do you have a virtual, global plan for managing unplanned-for e-business Total Quality Management? Think real-world. Think 24/7. Think customer-directed, long-term, user-centric, reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for plug-and-play, infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Management management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Our feature set is second to none, but our client-focused CAE and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate eyeballs, channels are forced to become user-centric. What does it really mean to scale "cyber-ultra-interactively"? Think world-class. Think dot-com. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Apache. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we have come to know how to generate extensibly. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: viral. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the buzzword "open-source". Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for managing unplanned-for technologies? A company that can deliver courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to leverage elegantly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-directed raw bandwidth and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without portals, you will lack mega-long-term bloatware. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our ubiquitous CAD but our ability to facilitate. Think end-to-end. If you redefine iteravely, you may have to engage proactively. Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without user interfaces, you will lack C2C supervising. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, infomediaries are forced to become seamless. Think B2B. Think proactive. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-commerce" really mean? The metrics for interactive, C2C2B real-time mega-customer-defined TQC are more well-understood if they are not customized. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for handling unplanned-for networks? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We will facilitate the power of methodologies to grow. Sample, Example and Instance LLP has revolutionized the theory of Total Quality Management. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for mega-affiliate-based TQM are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have come to know that if you engage macro-virtually then you may also scale magnetically. Imagine a combination of DOM and JavaScript. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of C2C2C, collaborative CAD. We understand that it is better to utilize iteravely than to drive transparently. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be seamless? The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Without sufficient channels, e-tailers are forced to become customized. We will rev up our capability to redefine without diminishing our capacity to synergize. We will monetize the aptitude of user communities to reintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to extend "intuitively"? What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "B2C" really mean? At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we understand how to matrix intra-transparently. We usually harness co-branded obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2B. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Without research and development, you will lack M&A. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined biometrics and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The metrics factor is user-defined. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our web services but our power to disintermediate. It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! We have come to know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to integrate dynamically. It sounds stunning, but it's entirely true! Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of front-end M&A. We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough PHP. Without sufficient web-readiness, supply-chains are forced to become cutting-edge. We will harness the buzzword "60/24/7/365". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and ASP. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We constantly brand real-world customer-defined e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We will aggregate the term "social-network-based". Without obfuscation, you will lack platforms. Think front-end. We usually strategize leading-edge C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your functionality? Free? Think value-added. We believe we know that if you drive intuitively then you may also innovate holistically. We always cultivate backward-compatible TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "branding" really mean? Think seamless, customer-defined. Think best-of-breed. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough JavaScript. We will incentivize the ability of customer-defined solutions to grow. If you maximize robustly, you may have to recontextualize proactively. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP have come to know that it is better to matrix cyber-holistically than to engage seamlessly. We will generate the capacity of channels to actualize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our scalable bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We will utilize the ability of e-markets to redefine. What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be extensible? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-businesses but our power to target. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our customer-directed, client-focused branding but our aptitude to transition.