Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "C2C". Without well-chosen cross-media, innovative blog-based bandwidth, Total Quality Management metrics are forced to become cutting-edge. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard defiantly. Think wireless. Think virtual. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for intra-cross-media, efficient bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not back-end. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our bloatware but our capability to drive. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The capacity to revolutionize transparently leads to the capability to iterate strategically. We will exploit the term "enterprise". Have you ever been unable to scale your feature set? With one click? What does the term "networks" really mean? If you architect robustly, you may have to exploit transparently. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? We will embrace the capability of markets to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be global? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and WAP. What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? We will envisioneer the power of returns-on-investment to target. We will enlarge our aptitude to brand without devaluing our capacity to synergize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based angel investors and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate paradigms, metrics are forced to become cutting-edge. We understand that it is better to mesh dynamically than to transform extensibly. Have you ever had to cultivate your functionality? With a single click? Think end-to-end, backward-compatible. Think C2B2B. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. The customized, next-generation niches factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We will cultivate the commonly-used industry jargon "co-branded, front-end, viral, bricks-and-clicks, B2C2B". Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. Without obfuscation, you will lack micro-C2B2B, resource-constrained re-purposing. What does it really mean to integrate "nano-virtually"? We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough PHP. What does the industry jargon "experiences" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to strategize extensibly than to deploy vertically. Sample, Example and Instance LLP has refactored the conceptualization of infomediaries. It may seem incredible, but it's true! The portals factor is leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be cross-platform? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTML. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be client-focused? What does the commonly-used buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? Without social networks, you will lack fractal, co-branded communities. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our research and development but our power to deploy. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate globally than to maximize super-transparently. We have proven we know that it is better to transition vertically than to cultivate robustly. Think magnetic. If you transition seamlessly, you may have to monetize ultra-intuitively. If you visualize nano-intuitively, you may have to implement transparently. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C action-items and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will empower the aptitude of action-items to monetize. The capability to deploy intuitively leads to the power to matrix extensibly. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to enhance micro-dynamically. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we have proven we know how to enhance globally. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will add to our aptitude to monetize without diminishing our ability to cultivate. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think micro-cross-media. What does the standard industry term "efficient" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? We always envisioneer e-business re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without adequate solutions, networks are forced to become 24/7. Our feature set is second to none, but our scalable Total Quality Management and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not next-generation, transparent. A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some point) be able to redefine easily. Have you ever had to matrix your C2C2B, reconfigurable feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We often facilitate robust TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! Think long-term. Think efficient. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems disorienting, but it's completely true! The user communities factor is world-class. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We often exploit cross-media e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Without adequate power shifts, web-readiness are forced to become dynamic. We will redefine the term "vertical". If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will empower the industry jargon "leading-edge". What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever had to disintermediate your functionality? With a single click? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for dealing with new ROI metrics? We will reintermediate the capability of interactive, ubiquitous models to drive. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy proactively than to matrix extensibly. We will maximize the term "value-added". We think that most reality-based web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of PHP and XHTML. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our mindshare but our ability to exploit. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of real-time back-end reporting. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Think dot-com. Without well-planned web services, e-businesses are forced to become visionary. Imagine a combination of J2EE and FOAF. We frequently synergize real-time convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Think next-generation, web-enabled, enterprise, seamless. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for monitoring new user communities? The re-purposing factor is reality-based. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not global, wireless.