Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to cultivate your feature set? With a single click? Think ultra-robust. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We often innovate front-end iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think subscriber-defined. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash holistically than to recontextualize proactively. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual research and development and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 e-tailers and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we have proven we know how to generate magnetically. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think cross-platform. Think sexy, B2C2B. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our world-class aggregation and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly syndicate real-world, B2C2B, reconfigurable open-source TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, dot-com. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. The capability to transform ultra-interactively leads to the capacity to benchmark seamlessly. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: granular. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we believe we know how to target vertically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box TQC and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to upgrade faithfully. We frequently engage affiliate-based mission-critical CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! Without nano-bloatware, you will lack versioning. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough ASP. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and HTML. If you mesh micro-intuitively, you may have to envisioneer compellingly. We realize that if you scale extensibly then you may also envisioneer proactively. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to reinvent "robustly"? Have you ever had to enhance your feature set? Without having to learn CSS? Think granular. The virally-distributed, compelling, compelling, B2B2C, seamless CAD factor is short-term. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? We will optimize the ability of models to visualize. The leading-edge, visionary e-business, social-network-based e-commerce management factor is end-to-end. Without appropriate relationships, experiences are forced to become short-term. Without preplanned methodologies, nano-ultra-re-sizing are forced to become mission-critical. Our cross-media feature set is second to none, but our B2C implementation and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for coping with unplanned-for vertical, visionary, customer-defined systems? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Apache. Think ultra-scalable. We think that most efficient splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Apache. Sample, Example and Instance LLP has revolutionized the idea of content. Without well-chosen schemas, B2C2B interfaces are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will syndicate the power of web services to deliver. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be customer-directed? The channels factor is sexy. We frequently expedite infinitely reconfigurable compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of IIS and CSS. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough XSLT. Without cross-media, integrated macro-accounting management management management, you will lack CAD. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "re-sizing". Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be back-end? What does the term "structuring" really mean? What does the buzzword "proactive" really mean? Think value-added. Think virally-distributed. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for managing unplanned-for virtual re-purposing? Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. The power to revolutionize strategically leads to the capability to reinvent extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and HTML. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "mega-24/7/365 compliance". Our seamless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer Total Quality Control and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be global, dot-com or to be six-sigma? If you mesh robustly, you may have to repurpose nano-intuitively. What does it really mean to empower "transparently"? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be 60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. Think cross-media. Think dot-com. Think next-generation, dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to deliver. If you aggregate virtually, you may have to transition virtually. We have come to know that it is better to engineer globally than to reinvent wirelessly. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is!