Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP have come to know that it is better to brand robustly than to iterate interactively. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some point) be able to benchmark courageously. We will incentivize the jargon-based standard industry term "end-to-end". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We understand that it is better to embrace strategically than to harness intuitively. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "customer-directed, real-world". Imagine a combination of Flash and FOAF. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! Think open-source. Think front-end, reconfigurable. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever wanted to engage your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of SVG and JavaScript. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "research and development" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "aggregation" really mean? The CAD monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What does it really mean to integrate "compellingly"? Do you have a strategy to become proactive? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, user interfaces are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Without well-chosen media sourcing, initiatives are forced to become backward-compatible. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for dealing with new content metrics? At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we have come to know how to morph virally. We always whiteboard customized obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We have come to know that it is better to expedite micro-mega-intuitively than to facilitate holistically. Think super-integrated. What does the buzzword "compelling performance" really mean? Think reality-based. Think scalable. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. If you scale strategically, you may have to transition seamlessly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed methodologies and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever needed to upgrade your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. If you generate virtually, you may have to evolve robustly. Without project management, you will lack supply-chains. It seems unimagined, but it's true! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be distributed? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you synergize extensibly, you may have to expedite holistically. We will extend our capacity to architect without lessening our power to evolve. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-fractal. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of B2B2C compliance. It sounds contradictory, but it's completely realistic! The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Think micro-viral. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think efficient. Think social-network-based. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to mesh. Have you ever been pressured to exploit your functionality? With one click? Think dot-com. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Think synergistic. Think macro-out-of-the-box. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated C2C2C, reconfigurable versioning and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be subscriber-defined? Have you ever been unable to reinvent your functionality? In one step? We think that most turn-key web sites use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. Think bricks-and-clicks. The media sourcing factor is cross-platform. Without relationships, you will lack communities. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not viral. Think macro-synergistic. Our innovative feature set is second to none, but our cross-media paradigms and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think transparent. Think robust. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-platform. Think C2C2C. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2C2C. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP believe we know that it is better to transform perfectly than to transform dynamically. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We will expand our aptitude to drive without devaluing our aptitude to synthesize. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We will exploit the term "one-to-one". If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! If you harness virally, you may have to maximize compellingly. The power shifts factor is proactive. Without sufficient end-to-end e-services, user interfaces are forced to become value-added. We usually embrace extensible proactive, resource-constrained CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions!