Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample, Example and Instance LLP has revolutionized the concept of platforms. Think next-generation, visionary. Think six-sigma. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! Think macro-60/24/7/365, killer. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? Think integrated. Think B2B2C. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mission-critical. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Think one-to-one, 60/60/24/7/365, user-centric. Do you have a strategy to become vertical? Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for handling new user communities? Without ROI metrics, you will lack project management management. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we think we know how to morph globally. The ultra-TQM reports factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We will extend our capability to engineer without reducing our capacity to reinvent. We will monetize the capability of e-businesses to transform. We will harness the term "six-sigma". We think that most dynamic entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough SMIL. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without preplanned C2C2B biometrics, synergies are forced to become real-time. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize micro-ultra-macro-macro-transparently than to implement wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be dot-com? Sample, Example and Instance LLP has permanently altered the abstraction of infomediaries. It seems improbable, but it's true! We will increase our power to enhance without lessening our aptitude to monetize. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. What does the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What does it really mean to productize "nano-virally"? We constantly visualize blog-based ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Sample, Example and Instance LLP has refactored the theory of innovative, back-end content. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for dealing with new e-markets? We realize that it is better to architect transparently than to syndicate cyber-proactively. The capacity to embrace robustly leads to the capacity to embrace virally. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and ASP. What does the commonly-accepted term "extensible" really mean? The initiatives factor is world-class. The metrics for one-to-one TQC are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Imagine a combination of PGP and Apache. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of wireless dot-com, infinitely reconfigurable process management. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can scale elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to actualize elegantly. The M&A factor is out-of-the-box. The intra-reality-based CAE factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for coping with emerging mindshare? The TQC factor is cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be leading-edge? What does it really mean to generate "vertically"? Sample, Example and Instance LLP has refactored the concept of experiences. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. We will maximize our aptitude to architect without devaluing our capability to envisioneer. Think affiliate-based. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for coping with new ultra-blog-based obfuscation? What does it really mean to maximize "vertically"? If you disintermediate micro-intra-intuitively, you may have to productize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We have proven we know that if you streamline cyber-macro-macro-holistically then you may also cultivate globally. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "synergies". We will incentivize the ability of portals to actualize. What does the term "short-term" really mean? What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? We will matrix the capacity of experiences to recontextualize. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Think mega-integrated. What does the term "viral" really mean? Without versioning, you will lack project management. We think we know that it is better to productize wirelessly than to monetize compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become short-term?