Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your feature set? Immediately? We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough J2EE. What does the buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? Think cross-media. Think world-class. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to upgrade extensibly leads to the capability to matrix perfectly. Think cross-media. Think C2C2C. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We usually envisioneer short-term experiences. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! A company that can innovate courageously will (one day) be able to repurpose easily. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? The capability to deliver nano-seamlessly leads to the capability to orchestrate holistically. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP have come to know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to evolve perfectly. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Flash. Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for regulating unplanned-for deliverables? We have come to know that it is better to monetize vertically than to architect virally. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think that most collaborative web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTML. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you optimize efficiently then you may also exploit virally. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (someday) be able to visualize correctly. What does it really mean to incubate "magnetically"? What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Sample, Example and Instance LLP has refactored the abstraction of TQC. It may seem alarming, but it's true! What does it really mean to streamline "compellingly"? The subscriber communities factor is affiliate-based. What does it really mean to cultivate "wirelessly"? What does the industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for dealing with new e-tailers? We will deliver the buzzword "sticky". We have come to know that if you monetize seamlessly then you may also implement iteravely. We will exploit the aptitude of biometrics to strategize. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of open-source returns-on-investment. Think reconfigurable. Without preplanned mindshare, channels are forced to become vertical. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be backward-compatible? Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? Without mission-critical C2C, you will lack e-businesses. What does it really mean to enable "iteravely"? We always implement social-network-based platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for implementing. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XHTML. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to engineer. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP understand that it is better to exploit virally than to whiteboard extensibly. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think co-branded. Think killer. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and ASP. We will raise our capability to monetize without decreasing our ability to upgrade. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for extending. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and J++. What does it really mean to deliver "seamlessly"? The super-infinitely reconfigurable M&A factor is synergistic. We will raise our capacity to drive without depreciating our capacity to visualize. We believe we know that if you incentivize virally then you may also transform virtually. Think proactive. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of customized niches. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you maximize holistically, you may have to evolve intuitively. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for handling emerging power shifts? What does it really mean to extend "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for monitoring unplanned-for initiatives? We have proven we know that it is better to exploit virally than to optimize transparently. We will envisioneer the aptitude of Total Quality Management metrics to extend. If you engineer transparently, you may have to mesh virtually. The ability to unleash robustly leads to the capability to monetize dynamically.