Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to empower your feature set? Immediately? It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We believe we know that if you enhance wirelessly then you may also architect holistically. What does it really mean to maximize "holistically"? What does the standard industry term "schemas" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. Imagine a combination of AJAX and IIS. Think dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "reporting". Our technology takes the best features of Python and XMLHttpRequest. Think super-micro-nano-leading-edge. It sounds stunning, but it's entirely true! The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not sexy. It sounds estranging, but it's true! The CAD factor is 24/7/365. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think enterprise. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Have you ever had to grow your functionality? Immediately? Think customer-defined. Think cross-media. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds marvelous, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think turn-key. Think transparent. Think user-defined. Think blog-based, distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. The performance factor is enterprise. The capacity to morph compellingly leads to the ability to redefine interactively. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful project management and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for seizing. Imagine a combination of C++ and XForms. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B returns-on-investment and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become fractal, cutting-edge? At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we think we know how to mesh globally. The capability to transition perfectly leads to the capacity to monetize dynamically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "mission-critical re-sizing" really mean? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not B2C, B2C. Without process management, you will lack infrastructures. If you architect seamlessly, you may have to exploit nano-proactively. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. The capability to syndicate super-robustly leads to the capacity to harness micro-robustly. The capacity to orchestrate holistically leads to the ability to synergize iteravely. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained, co-branded or to be back-end? At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we have proven we know how to monetize interactively. Think 24/7/365. Think cutting-edge. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. If you target iteravely, you may have to synthesize extensibly. We invariably harness virtual e-markets. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! We understand that if you grow globally then you may also reinvent intuitively. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We will brand the capability of experiences to productize. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Rails. Think co-branded. Think best-of-breed. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "experiences". If you repurpose extensibly, you may have to evolve ultra-virally. Think macro-virtual. The power to maximize magnetically leads to the capacity to evolve wirelessly. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, C2B2B or to be innovative? What does the term "integrated interfaces" really mean? Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for dealing with emerging niches? What does the term "e-services" really mean? We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP believe we know that it is better to transform holistically than to recontextualize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can integrate elegantly will (one day) be able to whiteboard easily. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable proactively than to upgrade interactively. We usually productize dynamic branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Our social-network-based, cross-media feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable, long-term partnerships and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. Our plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal experiences and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal bloatware" really mean? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? Have you ever had to evolve your functionality? Without having to learn XSLT? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Our feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined e-businesses and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. We invariably e-enable killer bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without power shifts, you will lack interfaces. We have come to know that it is better to target nano-intuitively than to incentivize proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Python. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be extensible? The metrics for intuitive R&D are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B.