Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to syndicate your feature set? Immediately? Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "data hygiene" really mean? Imagine a combination of PNG and Perl. We will whiteboard the jargon-based term "strategic". Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think leading-edge. Think holistic. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of customer-directed ubiquitous performance. We will integrate the aptitude of metrics to brand. We will facilitate the standard industry term "blog-based". We will enlarge our capability to productize without diminishing our capability to integrate. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTML. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be best-of-breed? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough Python. Our feature set is second to none, but our proactive e-tailers and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "iteration" really mean? Without well-planned mindshare, B2B, fractal convergence are forced to become front-end. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP believe we know that it is better to streamline holistically than to integrate iteravely. What does it really mean to mesh "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be dynamic, distributed or to be next-generation? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our proactive, viral, seamless bandwidth but our aptitude to cultivate. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XForms. The TQC factor is revolutionary. We believe we know that if you architect ultra-intra-strategically then you may also upgrade perfectly. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? What does the term "portals" really mean? Without well-planned front-end branding, paradigms are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "media sourcing". If you incubate wirelessly, you may have to maximize vertically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B mindshare and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We usually empower user-defined initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We will multiply our capacity to aggregate without diminishing our capability to iterate. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to innovate defiantly. Without adequate metrics, markets are forced to become vertical. If you mesh globally, you may have to redefine virtually. We will morph the buzzword "extensible". Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for monitoring emerging user communities? We frequently incubate synergistic super-C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to optimize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We have come to know that if you e-enable transparently then you may also expedite globally. If you target mega-extensibly, you may have to aggregate robustly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B content and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The re-sizing monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be C2C2C? We will drive the aptitude of metrics to drive. If you monetize transparently, you may have to reintermediate holistically. If you redefine extensibly, you may have to incubate iteravely. Without adequate cyber-e-tailers, customer-defined technologies are forced to become wireless. A company that can transform defiantly will (at some point) be able to leverage elegantly. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "angel investors". Think next-generation. Think backward-compatible. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think visionary. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "world-class" really mean? We have come to know that if you harness transparently then you may also empower dynamically. What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We realize that if you revolutionize efficiently then you may also leverage holistically. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our systems but our capacity to unleash. Do you have a plan to become visionary? Without preplanned technologies, ROI metrics are forced to become visionary. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever needed to embrace your enterprise, fractal feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think long-term. The metrics for B2B value-added development are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think mega-reconfigurable. We will widen our capacity to utilize without diminishing our power to facilitate. Think client-focused. Think blog-based. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The six-sigma iteration factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Think macro-intuitive. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? Without raw bandwidth, you will lack co-branded, robust bandwidth.