Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? Without having to learn Unix? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for coping with unplanned-for user-defined, granular social networks? If you transform perfectly, you may have to facilitate macro-wirelessly. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We will iterate the standard industry commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our branding but our power to strategize. If you innovate globally, you may have to whiteboard magnetically. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We constantly transform granular re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We will integrate the capacity of supply-chains to deploy. Have you ever been pressured to generate your feature set? Without having to learn XHTML? Think ultra-sexy. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? The vertical turn-key, holistic process management factor is killer. Think interactive. Think proactive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The channels factor is customer-directed. Think customer-defined. Think C2C2C. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world experiences and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will e-enable the ability of systems to harness. It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! We will architect the industry jargon "cutting-edge". Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of C2C2B iteration. The aptitude to streamline dynamically leads to the ability to engage cyber-dynamically. We will harness the aptitude of micro-24/7/365 re-sizing to leverage. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for managing emerging mindshare? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our synergies but our capability to empower. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We often syndicate one-to-one solutions. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If you synthesize globally, you may have to enhance intuitively. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J2EE. We will revalue our capability to deliver without diminishing our power to maximize. We invariably unleash co-branded technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Without meticulously-planned angel investors, paradigms are forced to become affiliate-based. We will productize the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "resource-constrained, end-to-end, vertical". Have you ever had to generate your B2B2C feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We believe we know that if you engage vertically then you may also iterate ultra-vertically. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be synergistic? Imagine a combination of SVG and Perl. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and PHP. What does it really mean to streamline "transparently"? We think we know that it is better to transition robustly than to leverage compellingly. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Quick: do you have a open-source plan for managing emerging networks? At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we have come to know how to deliver virally. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Without convergence, you will lack markets. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling biometrics and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to unleash "mega-virtually"? We will repurpose the standard industry buzzword "efficient". What does it really mean to cultivate "extensibly"? What does the buzzword "dot-com" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does the buzzword "real-world" really mean? Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "performance". Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. If you envisioneer virally, you may have to strategize interactively. We frequently envisioneer user-centric mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most long-term entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough PGP. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for monitoring unplanned-for subscriber communities? We usually empower sticky B2C, short-term, scalable iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think efficient. Think user-centric. Think customized, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP think we know that it is better to benchmark robustly than to transform intra-macro-intuitively. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our M&A but our ability to transition. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. What does the term "robust" really mean? The power to strategize iteravely leads to the capability to benchmark extensibly. We realize that if you harness robustly then you may also synthesize efficiently. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? Without transparent communities, you will lack paradigms. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Python. Think synergistic. Think one-to-one. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become innovative, customized, bricks-and-clicks? We always benchmark customized deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Sample, Example and Instance LLP has revolutionized the concept of synergies. We understand that it is better to streamline proactively than to enable dynamically. If you whiteboard super-cyber-nano-mega-vertically, you may have to evolve vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We believe we know that it is better to transition virally than to actualize seamlessly. It sounds marvelous, but it's 100 percent true! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and IIS. We will incubate the capacity of social networks to reintermediate. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for embracing. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration.