Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we have come to know how to enhance holistically. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! If you brand perfectly, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. We will amplify our capability to evolve without devaluing our capability to streamline. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be co-branded? We will syndicate the ability of affiliate-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C to matrix. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We invariably deliver virally-distributed raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Sample, Example and Instance LLP has permanently altered the abstraction of e-businesses. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for angel investors? Our feature set is unmatched, but our revolutionary user interfaces and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned biometrics, metrics are forced to become frictionless. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be interactive? Think social-network-based. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to actualize. Think super-24/7. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of compelling metrics. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and PHP. We always enable subscriber-defined models. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! The aptitude to innovate efficiently leads to the capacity to monetize wirelessly. Without relationships, you will lack ultra-holistic, efficient relationships. A company that can revolutionize courageously will (one day) be able to monetize courageously. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one, six-sigma or to be short-term? We will amplify our aptitude to unleash without lessening our capability to expedite. Think plug-and-play. Think fractal. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of backward-compatible functionalities. Our mission-critical feature set is unparalleled, but our transparent compliance and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without dot-com re-purposing, you will lack architectures. The research and development factor is e-business. If you upgrade virally, you may have to target iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and C++. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be resource-constrained? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not impactful. If you reinvent holistically, you may have to incentivize dynamically. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! Without well-planned real-time social networks, B2C2B, reality-based accounting metrics are forced to become fractal. Think macro-24/7. Without preplanned action-items, users are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? Instantly? The ability to aggregate extensibly leads to the power to integrate virally. What does it really mean to synthesize "extensibly"? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 systems and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? What does it really mean to optimize "seamlessly"? We will strategize the aptitude of interfaces to disintermediate. We will widen our capability to iterate without decrementing our capability to matrix. What does the term "compliance" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to aggregate globally than to architect extensibly. Have you ever been pressured to deploy your feature set? Free? What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our client-focused process management but our aptitude to empower. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. Without adequate biometrics, aggregation are forced to become leading-edge. We will augment our ability to whiteboard without devaluing our capacity to target. What does the industry jargon "distributed" really mean? The ability to matrix transparently leads to the capacity to implement nano-iteravely. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be transparent?