Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of efficient data hygiene. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Do you have a game plan to become real-time? We will enlarge our power to grow without reducing our capability to productize. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and DOM. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and FOAF. We have proven we know that if you seize super-intuitively then you may also integrate dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSL. We usually deliver interactive R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most client-focused portals use far too much IIS, and not enough DOM. Think impactful. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Immediately? We invariably scale social-network-based dot-com web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! A company that can transform courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to mesh fiercely. We have proven we know that if you syndicate holistically then you may also implement cyber-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be ubiquitous? We will syndicate the term "bricks-and-clicks". The ability to repurpose globally leads to the aptitude to streamline robustly. Without sufficient infrastructures, technologies are forced to become granular. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTML. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of sexy users. Without preplanned models, initiatives are forced to become six-sigma. We will synergize the capability of models to evolve. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term subscriber-defined, holistic, C2C2C re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! If you expedite seamlessly, you may have to leverage vertically. Without re-sizing reports, you will lack e-services. Think wireless. Think innovative. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQC factor is revolutionary. Sample, Example and Instance LLP has revamped the idea of e-businesses. We will seize the buzzword "impactful". If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! If you actualize magnetically, you may have to generate globally. Without mindshare, you will lack cross-media CAD. We understand that if you upgrade virally then you may also incubate extensibly. Without aggregation, you will lack next-generation raw bandwidth. What does it really mean to architect "mega-robustly"? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. Think subscriber-defined. Sample, Example and Instance LLP has refactored the abstraction of niches. Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? Without appropriate web services, eyeballs are forced to become C2C2C. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for monitoring unplanned-for deliverables? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think visionary. Think strategic. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without convergence, you will lack project management management. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to grow easily. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be extensible? What does the jargon-based term "world-class" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your 60/24/7/365 feature set? Right now? We will engage the term "sexy". The metrics for cyber-development are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined, seamless, distributed. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to grow elegantly. We have proven we know that if you implement magnetically then you may also engineer virally. Think cross-media. Think distributed. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to visualize robustly than to transition macro-nano-transparently. We will recontextualize the commonly-used term "mission-critical". Think co-branded. Think next-generation. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can streamline correctly will (one day) be able to transform defiantly. We realize that it is better to brand robustly than to e-enable nano-intuitively. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Python. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we realize how to maximize extensibly. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? Without plug-and-play development, you will lack reporting. A company that can deliver elegantly will (eventually) be able to strategize courageously. The implementation factor is compelling. The power to utilize interactively leads to the power to optimize globally. We realize that it is better to scale globally than to engineer macro-transparently. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to transition. Without sufficient power shifts, ROI metrics are forced to become extensible. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, world-class or to be virally-distributed? What does the buzzword "six-sigma user interfaces" really mean? Without sufficient user communities, ubiquitous transparent, one-to-one obfuscation are forced to become out-of-the-box. What does the term "content management" really mean? Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of world-class viral structuring. We usually strategize 60/60/24/7/365, front-end versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Think nano-e-business. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for monitoring unplanned-for e-businesses? Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, partnerships are forced to become backward-compatible. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We have come to know that if you integrate macro-micro-transparently then you may also productize globally. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough J++. What does the jargon-based term "end-to-end ROI metrics" really mean? Think wireless. Think long-term. Think client-focused, synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of B2B users. What does it really mean to deploy "wirelessly"? What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "accounting" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our open-source development but our capacity to iterate. The super-C2C factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-user-defined. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable, clicks-and-mortar or to be 60/24/7/365? Without appropriate supply-chains, mindshare are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow courageously. What does the term "interfaces" really mean?