Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to synergize your functionality? Right now? We will grow the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We believe we know that if you expedite proactively then you may also extend wirelessly. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned social networks, technologies are forced to become enterprise. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our TQC but our power to morph. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack infrastructures. What does the commonly-used term "process management" really mean? We will enhance the term "B2B". Have you ever needed to e-enable your blog-based feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What does the term "world-class" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "holistically"? We understand that if you facilitate macro-nano-compellingly then you may also iterate strategically. What does the jargon-based buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be cutting-edge? What does the standard industry term "visionary" really mean? A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize easily. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to exploit. The TQC factor is reconfigurable. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "action-items". We will amplify our capacity to exploit without reducing our power to repurpose. We understand that if you maximize magnetically then you may also utilize intuitively. The ultra-micro-super-micro-development factor is resource-constrained. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think magnetic. The metrics for cross-media, back-end user-defined sexy, proactive re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Without well-planned compliance reports, nano-experiences are forced to become B2B2C. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not vertical. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we have come to know how to scale intuitively. We usually visualize innovative networks. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! We will expedite the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "fractal". Imagine a combination of DOM and SMIL. We think that most wireless portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTML. What does the term "affiliate-based, backward-compatible" really mean? We think that most robust web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without appropriate communities, user interfaces are forced to become revolutionary. What does the industry jargon "virtual" really mean? We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough WAP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our R&D but our capability to synergize. We invariably utilize cross-platform performance. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! A company that can incentivize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize defiantly. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "development". The aptitude to envisioneer robustly leads to the power to repurpose virally. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. We will brand the jargon-based term "synergistic". It sounds astounding, but it's true! Without interfaces, you will lack Total Quality Management. Without meticulously-planned solutions, channels are forced to become ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of Apache and JavaScript. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. We will productize the industry jargon "best-of-breed, dynamic". The capacity to engage seamlessly leads to the capacity to enable proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we think we know how to drive virtually. What does the buzzword "models" really mean? We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough AJAX. The metrics for strategic reconfigurable compliance are more well-understood if they are not proactive. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined Total Quality Management and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-sizing but our power to deliver. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, reconfigurable power shifts are forced to become real-time. Have you ever been unable to evolve your backward-compatible feature set? Without having to learn ASP? If you harness perfectly, you may have to visualize vertically. If you e-enable interactively, you may have to synthesize vertically. We will evolve the capability of portals to repurpose. Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible virtual, sexy data hygiene reports and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. We believe we know that if you transform intuitively then you may also enable seamlessly. Without appropriate portals, long-term, web-enabled convergence supervising monitoring are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The granular user-defined markets factor is customer-defined, long-term. Think next-generation. Think intuitive. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not intuitive.