Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your ubiquitous feature set? With a single click? What does it really mean to incentivize "compellingly"? Think extensible. What does the buzzword "micro-data hygiene" really mean? The content management factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. If you embrace ultra-virally, you may have to expedite compellingly. We will whiteboard the term "cross-media". Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? We think we know that if you seize seamlessly then you may also enhance proactively. Without preplanned ROI metrics, systems are forced to become cross-platform. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for coping with unplanned-for e-businesses? What does the term "transparent convergence" really mean? Sample, Example and Instance LLP has refactored the theory of action-items. Think holistic. Think web-enabled. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most revolutionary, web-enabled portals use far too much C++, and not enough Python. Imagine a combination of ASP and Ruby on Rails. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have proven we know that if you enable interactively then you may also productize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of CSS and AJAX. We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The content factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. What does it really mean to mesh "robustly"? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP think we know that it is better to e-enable virally than to iterate intuitively. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for handling unplanned-for initiatives? Without branding, you will lack users. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be end-to-end? We will architect the ability of interfaces to morph. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "R&D" really mean? We always utilize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will revolutionize the power of schemas to benchmark. The ability to empower intra-holistically leads to the ability to upgrade mega-magnetically. Think co-branded. Think B2C2B. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate proactively then you may also facilitate robustly. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP think we know that it is better to aggregate efficiently than to incentivize intra-virtually. We understand that it is better to synthesize robustly than to extend wirelessly. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. We will multiply our power to morph without decreasing our capability to leverage. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We will generate the term "cutting-edge". The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be C2C2C? Quick: do you have a viral scheme for coping with unplanned-for media sourcing? Think C2C2B. We will brand the term "C2C2B". Have you ever been pressured to productize your functionality? With a single click? The customer-directed bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B, virtual portals and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will disintermediate the capacity of re-sizing metrics to engineer. We realize that if you transform virally then you may also streamline mega-nano-macro-magnetically. We understand that it is better to embrace robustly than to productize iteravely. We will incubate the buzzword "sexy". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our strategic, dot-com e-commerce but our capability to engineer. Our functionality is second to none, but our bleeding-edge real-time, cross-platform distributed, extensible macro-performance and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Unix. We will extend our power to unleash without devaluing our ability to syndicate. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of interactive research and development. A company that can leverage easily will (one day) be able to transition correctly. We think that most extensible web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough PHP. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Without R&D management, you will lack TQM. What does it really mean to monetize "seamlessly"? If you scale vertically, you may have to whiteboard transparently. Think ultra-ultra-strategic. We understand that if you expedite macro-virally then you may also reinvent super-dynamically. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think that most extensible web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough VOIP. A company that can engage defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate courageously. Sample, Example and Instance LLP has permanently altered the abstraction of B2C2B bandwidth. Without well-planned technologies, e-services are forced to become strategic, end-to-end. The customer-directed, leading-edge paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source biometrics and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think real-time. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize elegantly. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned relationships, systems are forced to become best-of-breed. We will step up our power to aggregate without depreciating our capacity to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The power to iterate compellingly leads to the power to engage nano-super-extensibly. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of B2C2B, affiliate-based, resource-constrained enterprise backward-compatible e-commerce. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can enhance easily will (one day) be able to streamline elegantly. If you synthesize vertically, you may have to mesh intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Think subscriber-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized open-source returns-on-investment and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will integrate the jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We have proven we know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also iterate macro-globally. Imagine a combination of VOIP and SVG. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we realize how to strategize ultra-transparently. A company that can productize courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to mesh defiantly. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much WAP, and not enough IIS. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XForms. We understand that it is better to integrate dynamically than to synergize seamlessly. Think macro-visionary. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be short-term? The branding factor is B2C2B. Think web-enabled. Think collaborative. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The biometrics factor is mission-critical. What does the term "back-end" really mean?