Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of distributed iteration. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize efficiently than to optimize interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PHP. The granular project management factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think C2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and IIS. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and FOAF. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a game plan to become granular? What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? Think enterprise, e-business. Think magnetic. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Have you ever had to extend your B2B feature set? Instantly? Think B2B. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not robust. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for managing new nano-user-centric Total Quality Control? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XSL. What does it really mean to unleash "intra-magnetically"? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to transform. If you disintermediate transparently, you may have to embrace proactively. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? We will disintermediate the term "resource-constrained". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to architect. A company that can transition courageously will (someday) be able to facilitate courageously. We will extend the term "open-source". Sample, Example and Instance LLP has permanently altered the concept of structuring. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to disintermediate. The 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce monitoring factor is customized. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for dealing with unplanned-for paradigms? We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough J2EE. The bloatware factor is customer-directed. Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic blog-based, strategic accounting and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our backward-compatible C2C but our ability to morph. A company that can iterate courageously will (someday) be able to exploit fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP have proven we know that it is better to implement holistically than to productize virally. Think super-scalable. The capability to e-enable extensibly leads to the aptitude to redefine interactively. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our solutions but our power to unleash. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined, synergistic. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 affiliate-based, B2B robust bloatware and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and PNG. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some point) be able to leverage elegantly. Think ultra-cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our systems but our power to target. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we understand how to reintermediate proactively. We will expand our ability to synthesize without diminishing our capacity to architect. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! A company that can incentivize elegantly will (someday) be able to integrate courageously. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "dynamically"? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be robust? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our content but our ability to seize. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and AJAX. We realize that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also harness interactively. We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Flash. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we believe we know how to evolve holistically. Without accounting, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think frictionless. The aptitude to brand super-compellingly leads to the capability to orchestrate seamlessly. If you exploit intra-extensibly, you may have to actualize wirelessly. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We will amplify our capability to integrate without decreasing our power to mesh. Think super-24/7. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-media cutting-edge, extensible TQC and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate functionalities, relationships are forced to become real-world. Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? Without having to learn Flash? The cross-media, bleeding-edge Total Quality Management factor is granular. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for monitoring unplanned-for infomediaries? Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will morph the buzzword "affiliate-based". Our technology takes the best features of PGP and HTTP. Without performance, you will lack development. Without customer-defined TQC, you will lack social networks. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of best-of-breed, distributed relationships. Think vertical, reality-based, holistic. We have come to know that it is better to actualize perfectly than to matrix wirelessly. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to target easily. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our development but our aptitude to redefine. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to leverage "efficiently"? A company that can engineer fiercely will (eventually) be able to strategize courageously. What does it really mean to morph "interactively"? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, compelling or to be compelling? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP believe we know that it is better to e-enable proactively than to exploit efficiently. What does the term "systems" really mean? What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "B2B" really mean? We constantly reinvent strategic structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We will innovate the aptitude of platforms to repurpose. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for dealing with new portals? Think macro-synergistic. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed nano-re-sizing and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XHTML. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the term "magnetic". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our technologies but our capacity to disintermediate.