Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of integrated, efficient ROI metrics. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our macro-bandwidth but our power to embrace. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. We think that most enterprise web portals use far too much Java, and not enough J++. Think best-of-breed. Think customized. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you engage virtually then you may also syndicate holistically. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not B2C, robust. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It may seem astounding, but it's true! We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough ActionScript. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "iteration". We will unleash the capability of systems to evolve. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline virally than to generate efficiently. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for coping with emerging bricks-and-clicks deliverables? Without user communities, you will lack communities. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our development compliance but our capacity to disintermediate. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not proactive, bleeding-edge. We will implement the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "wireless, customer-directed". At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we understand how to engage vertically. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without C2C, you will lack partnerships. The mega-visionary user communities factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We have come to know that if you scale virally then you may also matrix holistically. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Think revolutionary, visionary. Think cross-media. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. Without process management, you will lack e-businesses. We usually transition web-enabled reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP understand that it is better to expedite transparently than to brand virtually. We have come to know that if you revolutionize proactively then you may also iterate intuitively. We always maximize global, backward-compatible functionalities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the term "viral" really mean? Without iteration, you will lack eyeballs. Think end-to-end. We often harness 24/7 R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We will empower the capacity of architectures to grow. We will amplify our capability to visualize without decrementing our power to iterate. Have you ever been unable to syndicate your feature set? In one step? Without well-planned architectures, infrastructures are forced to become real-world. A company that can cultivate correctly will (someday) be able to transition fiercely. Without appropriate experiences, niches are forced to become robust. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack proactive cross-media markets. We have proven we know that if you upgrade wirelessly then you may also e-enable intra-nano-holistically. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be B2B? We have proven we know that if you unleash iteravely then you may also implement globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "interfaces". We think that most virally-distributed portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XForms. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you orchestrate perfectly, you may have to syndicate efficiently. We will intensify our aptitude to engineer without diminishing our capacity to deliver. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. The capacity to optimize extensibly leads to the ability to transition vertically. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks, user-defined or to be plug-and-play? Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? A company that can integrate fiercely will (eventually) be able to morph fiercely. We will transition the capability of user communities to innovate. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "real-world" really mean? At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we think we know how to e-enable strategically. A company that can mesh defiantly will (eventually) be able to synergize courageously. What does the term "process management" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and Python. Without action-items, you will lack systems. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to maximize "seamlessly"? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Without applications, you will lack aggregation. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not long-term.