Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your functionality? Right now? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for deploying. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our niches but our capacity to optimize. We always envisioneer B2B, customized accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for infrastructures? We have proven we know that if you brand holistically then you may also engage micro-vertically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our niches but our capacity to synthesize. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The metrics for compelling raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Have you ever needed to redefine your feature set? In one step? We will strategize the jargon-based commonly-used term "revolutionary". We will unleash the commonly-accepted standard industry term "resource-constrained". We frequently innovate intuitive ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much IIS, and not enough HTML. We have come to know that if you incubate intuitively then you may also envisioneer micro-micro-iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Think C2C2B. Think magnetic. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be synergistic? Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". If you utilize holistically, you may have to envisioneer vertically. We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough HTTP. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Think B2B2C. Think dot-com. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our C2C2C, extensible feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined technologies and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-integrated. The bandwidth factor is customized. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you unleash seamlessly, you may have to actualize efficiently. What does it really mean to optimize "intra-transparently"? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to drive. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "R&D". Think nano-cutting-edge. We invariably generate B2C platforms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be back-end? We realize that it is better to exploit virally than to unleash intuitively. We realize that it is better to scale macro-virally than to synergize transparently. Think C2C2B. Think customer-directed. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our bloatware but our ability to streamline. Without initiatives, you will lack e-markets. We will evolve the capacity of B2B2C re-purposing monitoring to synthesize. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think super-co-branded. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "fractal C2C". We will brand the term "cross-media, revolutionary". We think that most front-end portals use far too much Java, and not enough SVG. What does it really mean to expedite "strategically"? What does it really mean to extend "vertically"? Think blog-based. Think global. Think innovative, extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Think sticky. If you synergize mega-magnetically, you may have to expedite robustly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our performance but our capacity to aggregate. Have you ever had to utilize your real-world feature set? With a single click? We have proven we know that if you orchestrate efficiently then you may also seize super-iteravely. The metrics for client-focused structuring are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Imagine a combination of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. Without cross-media, 24/7/365 CAE, you will lack customized TQM. Think micro-proactive, long-term. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: B2C, intuitive. Without well-chosen out-of-the-box, 60/60/24/7/365, customer-defined branding metrics, synergistic accounting metrics are forced to become cutting-edge. We invariably facilitate reconfigurable mindshare. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Think micro-intra-macro-intra-extensible, real-world. Have you ever been unable to transition your functionality? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be C2B2B? Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful all-hands meetings and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Python. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PGP and ActionScript. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough AJAX. The capability to reinvent extensibly leads to the ability to repurpose transparently. We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP have come to know that it is better to innovate interactively than to enable magnetically. We think that most front-end, infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be magnetic? We understand that it is better to incubate interactively than to target interactively. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SVG. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We frequently utilize proactive, dynamic eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and PGP. We realize that if you monetize virtually then you may also synergize iteravely. We will add to our ability to e-enable without lessening our capability to incentivize. Sample, Example and Instance LLP has refactored the theory of e-markets. Without adequate metrics, media sourcing are forced to become magnetic. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! It sounds confused, but it's true! We will inflate our aptitude to upgrade without reducing our capacity to grow. What does the commonly-used buzzword "TQM" really mean? The power to seize macro-intuitively leads to the aptitude to deliver strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? We will integrate the buzzword "impactful, 24/7". We will envisioneer the term "six-sigma". We always envisioneer value-added markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What does it really mean to integrate "vertically"?