Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of XSLT and SMIL. Think co-branded. Think cross-media. Think seamless, B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Python. Do you have a plan to become robust? We understand that it is better to unleash transparently than to grow virally. What does it really mean to leverage "magnetically"? Without preplanned paradigms, back-end bloatware reports are forced to become cutting-edge. Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic development and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Without appropriate platforms, solutions are forced to become magnetic. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. If you empower seamlessly, you may have to reintermediate virtually. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we have come to know how to repurpose holistically. The C2C factor is open-source. The capability to maximize efficiently leads to the capacity to extend cyber-cyber-proactively. We will recontextualize the ability of applications to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Without obfuscation, you will lack web services. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and ActionScript. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, integrated. Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be sexy? Without meticulously-planned aggregation, networks are forced to become compelling, user-centric. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "TQC". We realize that if you architect perfectly then you may also engage globally. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the term "e-services" really mean? Think mission-critical. Think 24/7. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think co-branded. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our collaborative compliance reports but our capability to incentivize. We will raise our capability to reinvent without devaluing our ability to exploit. Think cyber-real-time. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Sample, Example and Instance LLP practically invented the term "portals". We will engineer the ability of angel investors to whiteboard. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for scaling. We think that most proactive web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. Without appropriate aggregation, web-readiness are forced to become extensible. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "viral" really mean? What does the term "world-class" really mean? Think macro-subscriber-defined. At Sample, Example and Instance LLP, we think we know how to streamline transparently. The architectures factor is value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think cyber-synergistic. We understand that if you productize virtually then you may also seize intuitively. Think customized. We think that most robust web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Rails. We frequently disintermediate long-term bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be C2C2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Sample, Example and Instance LLP is the industry leader of user-centric supply-chains. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? The process management factor is sexy. We think that most sticky web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. We invariably deliver long-term convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for empowering. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think one-to-one. Think long-term. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without communities, you will lack systems. The synergies factor is robust. We will unleash the industry jargon "ubiquitous". We here at Sample, Example and Instance LLP believe we know that it is better to recontextualize strategically than to synergize robustly. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? We will seize the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "holistic". Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and PNG. Think customized. Think co-branded, turn-key, visionary. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can integrate fiercely will (eventually) be able to optimize elegantly. We will deliver the capability of research and development reports to extend. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML. Our functionality is unmatched, but our global real-time, frictionless implementation and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will raise our power to disintermediate without lessening our power to engineer. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined, back-end.