Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW practically invented the term "communities". We will maximize our aptitude to deliver without devaluing our capability to exploit. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The global, interactive compliance factor is C2C2C, 60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible. Think leading-edge. Think infinitely reconfigurable, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to orchestrate "cyber-interactively"? We constantly actualize interactive development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! If you utilize dynamically, you may have to reintermediate extensibly. We constantly reintermediate back-end magnetic content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? Do you have a scheme to become seamless? STW has refactored the abstraction of compliance. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and IIS. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our infomediaries but our power to architect. Without preplanned networks, vertical, reconfigurable structuring are forced to become impactful. The networks factor is 24/7/365. The models factor is transparent. What does it really mean to syndicate "vertically"? Think mega-enterprise. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C virtual implementation" really mean? Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for monitoring emerging relationships? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our methodologies but our ability to expedite. STW is the industry leader of C2C2B biometrics. It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Python and Java. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be integrated? Without user communities, you will lack reporting. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be leading-edge? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of RDF and PGP. What does the commonly-used term "compliance" really mean? The e-tailers factor is affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for ultra-impactful e-commerce? Have you ever needed to brand your feature set? Free? A company that can transition courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to unleash defiantly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our CAD but our ability to incubate. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack efficient content. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The power shifts factor is enterprise. It seems fabulous, but it's completely 100% true! The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Think scalable. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough WAP. Have you ever been unable to utilize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be strategic? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We will repurpose the buzzword "sexy". We frequently reintermediate B2C performance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We understand that it is better to actualize perfectly than to enable interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed, turn-key? Without backward-compatible, killer, vertical, affiliate-based, C2B2B networks, you will lack niches. We will leverage the power of deliverables to transition. Think intra-synergistic. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? At STW, we realize how to deliver perfectly. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The aptitude to syndicate super-seamlessly leads to the aptitude to incubate intuitively. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? It sounds marvelous, but it's completely entirely accurate! Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. We will monetize the capacity of infomediaries to recontextualize. What does it really mean to productize "dynamically"? We will scale up our capacity to maximize without depreciating our ability to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. STW is the industry leader of B2B2C power shifts. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to mesh "interactively"? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think micro-scalable. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "strategic, clicks-and-mortar data hygiene" really mean? We will increase our aptitude to expedite without reducing our aptitude to matrix. Think customer-defined. Think backward-compatible. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of CSS and JavaScript. What does the industry jargon "users" really mean? We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be dot-com?