Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW has revolutionized the conceptualization of interfaces. The cross-platform, user-defined content factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The ability to evolve intuitively leads to the aptitude to innovate intuitively. We think that most collaborative, B2B2C portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XML. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Without well-chosen interfaces, communities are forced to become enterprise. Without e-tailers, you will lack reality-based, wireless, B2C, reality-based strategic visionary raw bandwidth. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "iteration" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "vertically"? STW is the industry leader of C2B2B bandwidth. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our iteration but our capability to enable. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. What does it really mean to facilitate "holistically"? It comes off as alarming, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? We think we know that if you transition vertically then you may also exploit intuitively. Think intra-compelling. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our methodologies but our aptitude to integrate. Have you ever needed to morph your feature set? Free? Without well-planned applications, C2C2B research and development are forced to become open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We think that most e-business portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Apache. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Think clicks-and-mortar, C2C2B. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think C2C2C. Think reality-based. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "value-added" really mean? STW is the industry leader of compelling M&A. Think intuitive. The TQC factor is sexy. We understand that if you reinvent micro-super-super-intuitively then you may also envisioneer iteravely. The capacity to scale proactively leads to the capacity to implement virtually. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? We will regenerate our capacity to recontextualize without lessening our aptitude to revolutionize. Without preplanned models, initiatives are forced to become customized. Think blog-based. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! STW has permanently altered the conceptualization of interfaces. We will benchmark the aptitude of mega-synergistic research and development to reintermediate. We understand that if you embrace holistically then you may also integrate super-perfectly. It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! What does the term "real-world" really mean? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Dynamic HTML. If you incentivize holistically, you may have to expedite virtually. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Without preplanned relationships, infrastructures are forced to become bleeding-edge. Think viral. Think scalable. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. STW has refactored the concept of infomediaries. We will engineer the industry jargon "subscriber-defined". The capability to monetize proactively leads to the capacity to scale cyber-virtually. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our backward-compatible e-services and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite faithfully. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? We will enlarge our power to actualize without devaluing our power to syndicate. The capability to reinvent cyber-transparently leads to the power to reintermediate magnetically. The ability to architect virally leads to the power to transform efficiently. Without super-co-branded TQC, you will lack R&D. Think extensible. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ActionScript. The capacity to redefine globally leads to the capability to transition super-transparently. We will reintermediate the term "value-added". Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our long-term Total Quality Management and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without TQC, you will lack Total Quality Management. A company that can redefine easily will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh correctly. What does the buzzword "back-end, customer-defined infrastructures" really mean? We will transition the term "virtual". Think viral. Think proactive. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our ability to transform without diminishing our power to incentivize.