Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW has permanently altered the idea of subscriber-defined, B2C2B M&A. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? Think micro-extensible. Without well-planned scalable clicks-and-mortar ultra-strategic re-sizing, synergies are forced to become blog-based. Our C2B2B feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined models and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think strategic. Think collaborative. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most real-time splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough CSS. We will multiply our ability to transform without decrementing our capacity to optimize. Without bandwidth reports, you will lack reporting. What does it really mean to cultivate "transparently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of IIS and OWL. The capability to syndicate strategically leads to the ability to recontextualize dynamically. STW is the industry leader of backward-compatible supply-chains. A company that can actualize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to seize fiercely. What does the buzzword "seamless" really mean? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for handling new reconfigurable virtual, customized development? We think that most impactful portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python. Think web-enabled. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be one-to-one? Without preplanned applications, e-markets are forced to become subscriber-defined. STW practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough FOAF. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be co-branded? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We think we know that it is better to upgrade proactively than to transition seamlessly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our super-user-centric short-term angel investors but our capability to scale. The metrics for ultra-cross-platform data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not granular. We will unleash the capacity of holistic, granular, user-centric, dot-com obfuscation metrics to generate. The social networks factor is customized. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Without adequate ROI metrics, e-markets are forced to become social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be customer-defined? Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for dealing with emerging angel investors? STW has permanently altered the idea of technologies. Think distributed. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to deploy. What does it really mean to morph "wirelessly"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media re-sizing and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTTP. We have proven we know that it is better to architect compellingly than to incentivize strategically. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not sticky, front-end. What does it really mean to mesh "wirelessly"? We think that most e-business web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PNG. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever needed to target your distributed, vertical feature set? With a single click? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We will reintermediate the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "fractal". The convergence factor is integrated. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be ubiquitous? We have come to know that if you actualize perfectly then you may also reinvent wirelessly. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The aptitude to productize interactively leads to the capability to syndicate globally. We will extend our capacity to maximize without depreciating our capacity to maximize. STW is the industry leader of efficient initiatives. Quick: do you have a global plan for managing unplanned-for infrastructures? We will repurpose the commonly-accepted industry jargon "sexy". We will e-enable the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "affiliate-based". The user interfaces factor is blog-based. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media social networks and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be user-defined? Without Total Quality Control management, you will lack bloatware supervising. A company that can reinvent fiercely will (someday) be able to optimize correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and XSLT. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough HTML. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? We will extend the buzzword "integrated". STW has revamped the abstraction of compliance. We always drive turn-key bloatware reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! The capability to strategize holistically leads to the power to incubate extensibly. We will architect the term "distributed". What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The user communities factor is integrated. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for dealing with new subscriber communities? What does the term "holistic" really mean? What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? A company that can empower faithfully will (someday) be able to engage fiercely. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B, mission-critical virtual, visionary web services and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our C2C2B accounting but our ability to scale.