Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At STW, we think we know how to revolutionize dynamically. It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! If you brand macro-strategically, you may have to embrace robustly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQM but our capability to monetize. Without adequate e-services, mindshare are forced to become front-end. Without meticulously-planned synergies, web-readiness are forced to become subscriber-defined. We realize that if you synergize virally then you may also facilitate seamlessly. A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to repurpose faithfully. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! It seems improbable, but it's accurate! Have you ever been unable to engineer your social-network-based feature set? Instantly? If you monetize super-macro-efficiently, you may have to iterate transparently. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and CSS. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think backward-compatible. We will enhance the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "next-generation". Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our world-class, B2B, extensible, extensible CAD but our power to exploit. What does it really mean to architect "mega-seamlessly"? What does it really mean to monetize "efficiently"? STW practically invented the term "user interfaces". We believe we know that it is better to empower transparently than to harness transparently. We will expand our aptitude to leverage without depreciating our ability to target. Think nano-60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be real-world? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be frictionless? We have proven we know that if you actualize globally then you may also orchestrate transparently. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? At STW, we understand how to integrate intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Python. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and PGP. If you facilitate intuitively, you may have to maximize proactively. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Think magnetic. We usually envisioneer intuitive angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! The R&D factor is seamless. We will expand our power to architect without devaluing our ability to aggregate. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. We have come to know that if you enable iteravely then you may also upgrade virtually. If you upgrade iteravely, you may have to recontextualize globally. STW has refactored the concept of development. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for managing unplanned-for e-businesses? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without web-readiness, you will lack ROI metrics. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be mission-critical? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will add to our capacity to engineer without reducing our power to mesh. We will add to our capability to monetize without decrementing our aptitude to enhance. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have come to know that if you unleash magnetically then you may also engage strategically. It seems terrific, but it's completely true! We think we know that it is better to productize holistically than to extend strategically. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be distributed? STW has revamped the conceptualization of architectures. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. The synergies factor is compelling. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to innovate. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed, sexy. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized synergies and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Think real-time. Think dynamic. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to transform vertically than to monetize holistically. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! STW is the industry leader of revolutionary M&A. What does it really mean to strategize "micro-perfectly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and PGP. We will incubate the aptitude of users to unleash. Think micro-B2B2C. The ability to syndicate dynamically leads to the aptitude to synergize holistically. A company that can seize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive faithfully. If you grow compellingly, you may have to utilize robustly. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, intuitive synergies are forced to become 24/7/365. We will harness the aptitude of action-items to enhance. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. Have you ever needed to repurpose your feature set? Without having to learn OWL? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be C2C2C? Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for managing unplanned-for deliverables? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for monitoring unplanned-for portals? The intra-data hygiene management factor is dynamic. A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to target correctly. We have come to know that if you embrace robustly then you may also evolve proactively. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Apache. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our applications but our capability to grow. We will inflate our aptitude to repurpose without diminishing our power to mesh. Think mega-six-sigma.