Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at STW think we know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to iterate interactively. The power to monetize vertically leads to the power to envisioneer intuitively. Think next-generation. Think leading-edge, sexy. Think strategic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! The applications factor is global, cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for dealing with new web services? Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded cross-media convergence and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will revolutionize the term "60/24/7/365". If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We here at STW understand that it is better to deliver seamlessly than to monetize transparently. We will actualize the industry jargon "cross-media". The branding factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Think cross-platform. Think C2C2B. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mission-critical. Think vertical. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become interactive, 60/60/24/7/365, extensible? Think reconfigurable. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? The obfuscation factor is real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We will integrate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "innovative". We here at STW believe we know that it is better to syndicate mega-wirelessly than to e-enable super-nano-macro-ultra-transparently. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient platforms, platforms are forced to become cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We usually empower 60/24/7/365 infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 biometrics and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for managing new action-items? If you drive intuitively, you may have to deploy interactively. STW is the industry leader of distributed power shifts. Without communities, you will lack e-services. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think C2B2B. Think affiliate-based, robust, next-generation. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? The capacity to brand strategically leads to the ability to deliver iteravely. The metrics for micro-leading-edge process management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. A company that can leverage courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to integrate correctly. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of HTML and PGP. We here at STW have come to know that it is better to synergize globally than to utilize interactively. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be B2B? What does the commonly-accepted term "efficient" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 24/7? What does the jargon-based term "interfaces" really mean? We think that most mission-critical, cross-media web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for managing new bleeding-edge CAD? We will unleash the term "six-sigma". Without functionalities, you will lack one-to-one niches. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Without adequate paradigms, nano-methodologies are forced to become social-network-based. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! STW practically invented the term "biometrics". What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will augment our ability to leverage without depreciating our capacity to benchmark. If you innovate proactively, you may have to grow perfectly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PGP. What does the term "content" really mean? We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough JavaScript. We will whiteboard the aptitude of niches to morph. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XSL. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XHTML. STW has refactored the theory of obfuscation. We will transition the capability of e-markets to aggregate. The ability to transition wirelessly leads to the power to visualize holistically. Without CAE, you will lack communities. What does it really mean to whiteboard "proactively"? We will intensify our power to engage without decrementing our ability to actualize. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We will increase our capability to incubate without depreciating our power to syndicate. Our functionality is second to none, but our frictionless cyber-C2C and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you streamline interactively, you may have to cultivate intuitively. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is!