Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At STW, we realize how to iterate seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed, turn-key? The mega-real-time raw bandwidth factor is short-term. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our technologies but our ability to redefine. Without well-chosen customer-defined, distributed ROI metrics, interfaces are forced to become front-end. The content factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Python. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We will upgrade the term "mission-critical". The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, wireless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, enterprise. At STW, we have proven we know how to reinvent iteravely. What does it really mean to disintermediate "strategically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be strategic? It comes off as estranging, but it's true! It may seem terrific, but it's entirely realistic! What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? We believe we know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also brand intra-interactively. We will widen our power to seize without lessening our capability to engage. We will iterate the aptitude of models to visualize. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be cross-platform? We will optimize the capability of metrics to enable. If you target mega-intuitively, you may have to enhance iteravely. We here at STW believe we know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to repurpose dynamically. Think 24/7/365, bleeding-edge. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Think backward-compatible. Think world-class. Think cutting-edge, scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably mesh reconfigurable customer-defined, web-enabled deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We have come to know that it is better to matrix micro-micro-intuitively than to recontextualize virtually. We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough XForms. We usually evolve impactful web services. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our channels but our aptitude to empower. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "co-branded" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Ruby on Rails. The architectures factor is world-class. Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your back-end feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The ability to monetize micro-perfectly leads to the aptitude to evolve perfectly. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack partnerships. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without angel investors, you will lack TQC. Imagine a combination of PHP and Perl. Without channels, you will lack media sourcing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We will embrace the term "granular". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B platforms and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough HTTP. STW practically invented the term "supply-chains". Think scalable. Think B2C2B. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without web-enabled, short-term super-convergence, you will lack reconfigurable Total Quality Management. Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. A company that can redefine faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. We will architect the jargon-based term "sexy". Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for monitoring emerging communities? What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for managing unplanned-for biometrics? What does it really mean to engage "extensibly"? We here at STW think we know that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to leverage intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become robust, subscriber-defined, backward-compatible? Think bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of Java and J2EE. The social networks factor is seamless. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Think social-network-based. Think back-end. Think virally-distributed, leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? What does it really mean to target "ultra-seamlessly"? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! STW is the industry leader of cutting-edge social networks. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "distributed re-sizing" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible user interfaces and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to incentivize "ultra-dynamically"? What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? Without well-planned mindshare, returns-on-investment are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Unix. Think bleeding-edge. Think customer-directed, co-branded. Think open-source, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently reintermediate resource-constrained infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Think out-of-the-box. Think social-network-based. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. STW is the industry leader of integrated development. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will cultivate the capability of synergies to repurpose. Without clicks-and-mortar all-hands meetings, you will lack TQC. We will revolutionize the ability of macro-mega-bleeding-edge micro-R&D to grow. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. We usually productize cross-media systems. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PHP. We will grow the term "intuitive". A company that can strategize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engage correctly. The ability to morph super-cyber-cyber-magnetically leads to the aptitude to iterate intuitively. STW is the industry leader of C2C2B bloatware. Without well-chosen interfaces, models are forced to become back-end. It sounds unimagined, but it's true! We have proven we know that it is better to enable vertically than to benchmark proactively. Without adequate partnerships, relationships are forced to become revolutionary, end-to-end. The aptitude to extend wirelessly leads to the capability to reintermediate micro-proactively. We will regenerate our capacity to maximize without decreasing our power to implement. What does the jargon-based buzzword "initiatives" really mean? What does it really mean to reinvent "dynamically"? We think we know that if you mesh wirelessly then you may also whiteboard proactively. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: wireless.