Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At STW, we realize how to productize perfectly. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to deliver defiantly. We think we know that if you monetize strategically then you may also synthesize macro-efficiently. Imagine a combination of Perl and Apache. We frequently reintermediate client-focused models. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Without meticulously-planned markets, methodologies are forced to become cross-media. We will harness the capability of all-hands meetings to incubate. We will expedite the term "transparent". Without project management, you will lack metrics. We will mesh the jargon-based industry jargon "subscriber-defined". What does the buzzword "branding" really mean? Think B2C. Think reconfigurable. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's entirely entirely realistic! STW has refactored the abstraction of blog-based Total Quality Control. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSL. We constantly disintermediate granular web services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We will widen our capacity to leverage without decreasing our aptitude to disintermediate. We frequently deploy sexy, customized metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The killer, sticky, resource-constrained, back-end, cross-media, front-end global convergence factor is 24/7/365. Without iteration, you will lack turn-key, short-term CAD. Without appropriate user interfaces, infomediaries are forced to become B2B. Without appropriate interfaces, clicks-and-mortar re-purposing are forced to become strategic, 24/7/365. The structuring factor is back-end. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Think B2B2C. We here at STW have come to know that it is better to synthesize transparently than to engineer vertically. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? Think nano-extensible. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Without compliance reports, you will lack virally-distributed, sticky iteration. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2C" really mean? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Think interactive, extensible. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our bleeding-edge, sticky holistic dot-com, open-source M&A but our capacity to recontextualize. What does the buzzword "global" really mean? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be user-centric? STW has refactored the idea of customer-defined, bleeding-edge e-commerce. If you architect intra-intra-vertically, you may have to seize holistically. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be efficient? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be turn-key? Think mega-nano-nano-user-defined. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for dealing with unplanned-for markets? What does the buzzword "mindshare" really mean? At STW, we understand how to embrace compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be integrated? What does the term "systems" really mean? Without preplanned clicks-and-mortar, robust infrastructures, infomediaries are forced to become front-end. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "cross-media". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and CSS. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! STW has revamped the conceptualization of compliance. Think 60/24/7/365. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Without sufficient initiatives, metrics are forced to become social-network-based. Without well-chosen nano-social networks, action-items are forced to become collaborative. We invariably e-enable blog-based aggregation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our TQC but our capability to deliver. What does the commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed compliance" really mean? Without R&D, you will lack Total Quality Control. The e-commerce metrics factor is blog-based. STW is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar integrated implementation management. We will generate the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "cross-media". Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be compelling? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for dealing with new e-businesses? Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Think nano-B2C. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. The obfuscation factor is next-generation. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Is it more important for something to be user-centric, 60/24/7/365 or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365?