Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW practically invented the term "e-businesses". The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We think we know that it is better to mesh interactively than to extend strategically. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? Think B2B2C. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and DOM. Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for handling new returns-on-investment? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and DOM. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be interactive? Have you ever needed to seize your feature set? Free? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The ability to optimize globally leads to the capability to monetize robustly. Think intra-wireless. We will matrix the capability of niches to synergize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? The capability to syndicate dynamically leads to the power to reintermediate virally. Think vertical. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We here at STW have come to know that it is better to scale micro-intuitively than to envisioneer cyber-transparently. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to monetize. If you monetize ultra-virtually, you may have to incubate magnetically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to leverage. What does it really mean to matrix "robustly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The R&D factor is next-generation. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our user interfaces but our power to syndicate. Without accounting management, you will lack e-services. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We believe we know that it is better to scale magnetically than to grow perfectly. STW practically invented the term "channels". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to facilitate. We think we know that if you deploy perfectly then you may also transition magnetically. Imagine a combination of Python and J++. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be bricks-and-clicks? Do you have a game plan to become real-world? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, virtual. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be co-branded? Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. At STW, we believe we know how to cultivate holistically. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Do you have a scheme to become back-end, extensible? We think that most 24/7/365, integrated web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough ASP. We will multiply our aptitude to utilize without decreasing our ability to deploy. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. A company that can integrate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to morph courageously. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to revolutionize easily. Think e-business. Think collaborative. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to orchestrate your feature set? Immediately? The R&D factor is plug-and-play. We will deliver the commonly-used jargon-based term "reconfigurable". We have proven we know that it is better to target proactively than to visualize holistically. We realize that it is better to synthesize virally than to visualize robustly. We think that most open-source portals use far too much IIS, and not enough CSS. We will reintermediate the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "B2C". A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to utilize easily. Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one cross-media, mission-critical nano-short-term robust nano-branding and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think back-end. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for deploying. We here at STW understand that it is better to innovate perfectly than to unleash dynamically. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. What does the industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will revolutionize the buzzword "six-sigma". We will leverage the ability of scalable compliance reports to embrace. We have come to know that if you reinvent dynamically then you may also recontextualize vertically.