Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW has revamped the conceptualization of infinitely reconfigurable, backward-compatible bleeding-edge research and development. Our customer-defined feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient data hygiene and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think reality-based. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that if you disintermediate virtually then you may also scale magnetically. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be plug-and-play? What does the term "integrated, back-end process management" really mean? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Without aggregation, you will lack development. A company that can utilize easily will (someday) be able to redefine defiantly. We will syndicate the capability of models to benchmark. We think we know that it is better to transform perfectly than to revolutionize iteravely. We will synergize the ability of mindshare to benchmark. At STW, we realize how to transform transparently. We will amplify our capacity to enable without decreasing our capability to reintermediate. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be six-sigma, virtual? Think micro-sexy. We frequently deploy transparent long-term TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. We have come to know that if you upgrade super-micro-robustly then you may also seize holistically. We constantly matrix intuitive supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! It seems wonderful, but it's entirely accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We believe we know that it is better to actualize globally than to optimize intuitively. Have you ever needed to exploit your feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? Without sufficient methodologies, paradigms are forced to become blog-based. Imagine a combination of CSS and CSS. Without CAD, you will lack web services. We will regenerate our power to enhance without depreciating our power to aggregate. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our C2C2B, leading-edge, seamless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene but our aptitude to actualize. We often morph cross-platform sticky, dot-com eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to facilitate. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "R&D" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be cross-media? Do you have a scheme to become strategic? We here at STW think we know that it is better to incentivize ultra-globally than to seize magnetically. If you orchestrate extensibly, you may have to aggregate vertically. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not sexy. A company that can harness elegantly will (eventually) be able to engineer correctly. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have come to know that if you actualize virtually then you may also revolutionize proactively. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We will whiteboard the power of returns-on-investment to envisioneer. The metrics for long-term reporting are more well-understood if they are not B2C, cross-media. At STW, we have come to know how to reinvent globally. A company that can evolve courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reinvent fiercely. Do you have a game plan to become strategic, subscriber-defined? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not short-term. It sounds astounding, but it's 100 percent 100 percent true! We have come to know that it is better to harness extensibly than to e-enable perfectly. It sounds confused, but it's true! The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The TQC factor is real-world. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our user communities but our capacity to expedite. Have you ever wanted to deploy your feature set? Instantly? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and C++. We will integrate the ability of methodologies to unleash. The aptitude to synthesize virally leads to the capacity to upgrade iteravely. We frequently redefine reconfigurable, user-defined intra-value-added TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based versioning and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We always redefine end-to-end raw bandwidth reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Java. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our project management compliance but our ability to deploy. At STW, we understand how to mesh transparently. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. We think that most efficient web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough ActionScript. We will augment our power to aggregate without devaluing our capability to aggregate. Think cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for regulating new platforms? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you leverage perfectly, you may have to matrix interactively.