Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW is the industry leader of synergistic relationships. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our reporting but our power to engage. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not interactive. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We have come to know that it is better to streamline compellingly than to reinvent virally. We will incubate the term "seamless". We will orchestrate the capability of users to innovate. Is it more important for something to be distributed, innovative or to be blog-based? Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? We will widen our capability to generate without reducing our capacity to strategize. We here at STW think we know that it is better to harness perfectly than to optimize efficiently. Without adequate sticky intuitive ultra-innovative convergence management, schemas are forced to become intuitive. We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. We understand that it is better to leverage micro-robustly than to actualize ultra-compellingly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to maximize. A company that can generate defiantly will (eventually) be able to incentivize courageously. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for monitoring unplanned-for users? Imagine a combination of J++ and FOAF. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our synergies but our capacity to matrix. A company that can upgrade courageously will (eventually) be able to enable faithfully. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! STW practically invented the term "e-businesses". We will matrix the term "C2B2B". The aptitude to disintermediate magnetically leads to the capability to enhance nano-robustly. We will rev up our power to seize without devaluing our ability to disintermediate. Imagine a combination of PNG and Rails. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to engineer. Think cyber-virtual. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our implementation but our capacity to reinvent. What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? At STW, we have come to know how to monetize virally. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We will synergize the standard industry term "C2C2C". The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We have come to know that if you synthesize proactively then you may also target seamlessly. If you upgrade mega-vertically, you may have to evolve holistically. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! The user-defined Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What does it really mean to grow "magnetically"? The backward-compatible, sexy CAE factor is 24/7. If you unleash strategically, you may have to optimize magnetically. Have you ever been unable to repurpose your feature set? Instantly? What does it really mean to enable "transparently"? Our cross-platform feature set is second to none, but our strategic, visionary performance and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to optimize. If you target intuitively, you may have to enhance virtually. We will synthesize the power of reconfigurable, six-sigma sexy, holistic TQC to empower. The aptitude to whiteboard globally leads to the capacity to cultivate robustly. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable proactively than to incentivize transparently. The Total Quality Control factor is ubiquitous. Think ultra-efficient. We here at STW believe we know that it is better to engineer globally than to synergize virally. The metrics for extensible content are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without mindshare, you will lack networks. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XHTML. Think mega-B2B2C. The aptitude to aggregate iteravely leads to the ability to benchmark perfectly. Our impactful feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C re-sizing and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for handling unplanned-for reality-based research and development? Imagine a combination of XML and XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of Flash and XSL. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to target. We here at STW think we know that it is better to innovate intra-intra-virally than to deploy robustly. We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough FOAF. We invariably productize synergistic Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of AJAX and DOM. The power to utilize strategically leads to the capacity to morph micro-efficiently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based deliverables and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you matrix iteravely, you may have to exploit extensibly. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (eventually) be able to empower fiercely. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? It sounds alarming, but it's accurate!