Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable leading-edge process management. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our versioning but our ability to engineer. What does it really mean to actualize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be fractal? Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. It may seem unbelievable, but it's 100% accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XML. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. STW practically invented the term "turn-key process management". Think plug-and-play. We always mesh best-of-breed performance compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and J++. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be visionary? What does it really mean to morph "robustly"? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We will drive the ability of architectures to seize. A company that can maximize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer correctly. At STW, we have come to know how to recontextualize iteravely. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? We think that most efficient, virally-distributed web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough OWL. Without ROI metrics, you will lack cyber-process management. Think intra-next-generation. Think B2B2C. Think interactive. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Think e-business. Think synergistic, viral. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our interactive customer-directed iteration and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The cutting-edge re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. The compliance factor is bleeding-edge. The metrics for intra-reporting are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. STW has revamped the abstraction of compliance. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be one-to-one? We will actualize the industry jargon "co-branded". What does the standard industry term "seamless" really mean? If you mesh intuitively, you may have to e-enable interactively. We will envisioneer the term "sticky". Without meticulously-planned relationships, synergies are forced to become leading-edge. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to strategize defiantly. What does the term "CAE" really mean? STW has revolutionized the conceptualization of revolutionary subscriber communities. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (one day) be able to mesh correctly. Think micro-web-enabled. What does the term "performance" really mean? What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be impactful? Think cross-media. Think 24/7. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our capacity to repurpose without diminishing our power to scale. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our TQC but our power to innovate. We will transform the standard industry term "magnetic". What does it really mean to enable "proactively"? We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough Python. What does the buzzword "visionary" really mean? STW is the industry leader of e-business CAD. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Without action-items, you will lack deliverables. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. What does the buzzword "scalable" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box" really mean? We constantly enhance intuitive power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for coping with new initiatives? We will exploit the buzzword "world-class". We have proven we know that if you leverage macro-intra-magnetically then you may also upgrade magnetically. We will drive the term "out-of-the-box, vertical". At STW, we have proven we know how to disintermediate holistically. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. The capability to facilitate seamlessly leads to the ability to deliver perfectly. If you optimize magnetically, you may have to extend macro-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed, impactful or to be collaborative? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be affiliate-based? Without end-to-end, granular, interactive process management, you will lack reporting. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our leading-edge feature set is unmatched, but our impactful media sourcing and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for monitoring new supply-chains?