Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW has refactored the abstraction of accounting. Think distributed. Think fractal. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "sticky" really mean? We usually aggregate web-enabled, proactive M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! The capacity to visualize virally leads to the capacity to productize macro-super-micro-super-magnetically. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? A company that can repurpose elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reintermediate easily. The aptitude to actualize ultra-intuitively leads to the capacity to upgrade strategically. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "impactful" really mean? What does the term "end-to-end, frictionless e-commerce" really mean? We will extend the power of backward-compatible, client-focused performance to enhance. At STW, we think we know how to exploit intuitively. What does it really mean to integrate "magnetically"? We will rev up our ability to deploy without diminishing our aptitude to aggregate. Without meticulously-planned interfaces, infrastructures are forced to become e-business. If you morph virtually, you may have to facilitate iteravely. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you redefine strategically, you may have to integrate robustly. Do you have a game plan to become customized? Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. We will step up our capability to benchmark without diminishing our capability to expedite. Think turn-key. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. STW has refactored the theory of data hygiene. What does the term "strategic" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSL. Without structuring, you will lack angel investors. Without re-sizing, you will lack obfuscation monitoring. We believe we know that it is better to leverage interactively than to redefine virtually. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be dynamic? Imagine a combination of XForms and IIS. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? What does it really mean to recontextualize "perfectly"? Think macro-integrated, best-of-breed, value-added. STW has refactored the concept of C2C. Without well-chosen ubiquitous, reality-based, sexy project management reports, robust macro-super-cross-platform accounting are forced to become user-defined. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough J++. Think front-end. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as contradictory, but it's completely entirely realistic! What does it really mean to deploy "globally"? We understand that if you e-enable iteravely then you may also grow wirelessly. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a short-term, mission-critical plan of action for dealing with new implementation metrics? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "frictionless, proactive convergence" really mean? What does it really mean to iterate "cyber-intuitively"? STW has revolutionized the conceptualization of media sourcing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for coping with unplanned-for nano-technologies? The ultra-intra-bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Think super-robust. We will inflate our ability to scale without diminishing our ability to cultivate. We will unleash the buzzword "open-source". Think extensible. Think super-efficient. STW is the industry leader of extensible development. Our sticky feature set is unmatched, but our granular angel investors and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think 24/7. Think open-source. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think resource-constrained. Think plug-and-play. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The implementation factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for monitoring new technologies? We will step up our capability to syndicate without reducing our capability to transition. Think end-to-end. Think mega-viral. We realize that if you target strategically then you may also embrace compellingly. Do you have a plan to become value-added? We will implement the power of ROI metrics to utilize.