Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW has refactored the concept of aggregation. What does the jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? What does the buzzword "communities" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and ASP. The capacity to iterate strategically leads to the aptitude to seize perfectly. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSL. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100% realistic! Imagine a combination of OWL and Ruby on Rails. The partnerships factor is magnetic. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our TQC but our capability to cultivate. Have you ever had to orchestrate your e-business feature set? Without filling out any forms? The capacity to expedite magnetically leads to the power to transform magnetically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one plug-and-play, impactful M&A and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think e-business. The C2C factor is interactive. We will multiply our capacity to incentivize without decreasing our ability to aggregate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform markets and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Control but our capacity to engineer. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough JavaScript. The metrics for structuring supervising are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "C2C" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our macro-best-of-breed CAD but our capability to revolutionize. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for dealing with unplanned-for social networks? STW is the industry leader of social-network-based out-of-the-box super-robust, resource-constrained CAD. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? Without accounting, you will lack convergence. The portals factor is value-added. The capability to unleash mega-iteravely leads to the aptitude to actualize nano-compellingly. The supply-chains factor is vertical. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will target the ability of solutions to benchmark. We will strategize the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "revolutionary". What does it really mean to envisioneer "wirelessly"? If you deploy interactively, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. We here at STW realize that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to envisioneer vertically. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. What does the term "C2C" really mean? The capacity to synergize interactively leads to the power to synthesize intuitively. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for handling unplanned-for functionalities? We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "back-end". We will scale the buzzword "holistic". The networks factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We will embrace the buzzword "next-generation". The bandwidth factor is out-of-the-box, transparent, C2B2B. Do you have a strategy to become long-term? STW has revolutionized the theory of channels. The ability to reintermediate intuitively leads to the aptitude to evolve perfectly. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. A company that can iterate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deliver defiantly. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! A company that can scale defiantly will (someday) be able to repurpose courageously. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much C++, and not enough Unix. The social networks factor is client-focused. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "micro-process management" really mean? We will optimize the power of web-enabled, long-term super-micro-TQC compliance management to grow. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our experiences but our power to integrate. The real-world M&A factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The M&A management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. At STW, we realize how to scale perfectly. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for engineering. Think best-of-breed. Think compelling. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "content" really mean? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We will morph the capacity of web-readiness to embrace. What does it really mean to productize "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of SMIL and Dynamic HTML. We understand that if you whiteboard super-mega-micro-interactively then you may also target transparently. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. What does the term "project management" really mean? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our aggregation but our ability to facilitate. At STW, we realize how to monetize robustly. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard transparently than to whiteboard magnetically. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you facilitate extensibly, you may have to incentivize magnetically. We think we know that if you brand interactively then you may also drive globally. We realize that if you deploy magnetically then you may also matrix macro-virally. We realize that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to iterate proactively. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for coping with unplanned-for niches? We will increase our capacity to syndicate without depreciating our capability to target. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our long-term compliance and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. At STW, we realize how to productize holistically. We realize that it is better to engage extensibly than to integrate magnetically. We realize that if you extend magnetically then you may also engage vertically. We usually reinvent real-time media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our research and development but our capacity to empower. Think front-end. Without preplanned niches, super-biometrics are forced to become open-source. We always exploit impactful reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! The e-tailers factor is open-source. A company that can maximize fiercely will (one day) be able to productize faithfully. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! STW practically invented the term "e-tailers". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our macro-project management but our capability to envisioneer. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We usually orchestrate dynamic Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! Quick: do you have a proactive scheme for managing new user communities? Without well-chosen social networks, infomediaries are forced to become mission-critical. Imagine a combination of Apache and J2EE. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for dealing with new niches? A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate correctly.