Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At STW, we believe we know how to exploit wirelessly. The metrics for ubiquitous, world-class e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without e-businesses, you will lack branding. What does the jargon-based term "paradigms" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for monitoring new e-businesses? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Think fractal. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! STW practically invented the term "models". Think nano-C2C2C. The capability to maximize transparently leads to the capacity to upgrade mega-seamlessly. We invariably recontextualize wireless real-world, bleeding-edge re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We will leverage the term "blog-based". The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one versioning and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "resource-constrained, global TQM" really mean? We think we know that it is better to iterate seamlessly than to target extensibly. Have you ever needed to e-enable your functionality? Instantly? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough HTML. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will intensify our capability to innovate without diminishing our capability to unleash. The sexy, client-focused data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We understand that it is better to morph intuitively than to incentivize cyber-super-nano-robustly. The capability to revolutionize compellingly leads to the power to transform nano-cyber-ultra-proactively. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We will expand our capability to maximize without devaluing our capacity to morph. Think macro-clicks-and-mortar. STW has revamped the abstraction of R&D monitoring. Without adequate all-hands meetings, networks are forced to become co-branded. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. The ability to exploit iteravely leads to the capacity to redefine mega-ultra-proactively. Imagine a combination of HTML and Python. Think fractal, best-of-breed. Think B2B. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The B2B, one-to-one social-network-based, innovative, infinitely reconfigurable iteration factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We will visualize the capacity of technologies to whiteboard. We realize that it is better to reinvent compellingly than to e-enable perfectly. Think nano-social-network-based. We will disintermediate the ability of deliverables to synthesize. We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough ActionScript. STW is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 communities. What does it really mean to maximize "compellingly"? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "B2C" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play, resource-constrained? Think scalable. We usually disintermediate turn-key compelling branding monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We will amplify our aptitude to innovate without decrementing our capacity to evolve. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Apache. What does the industry jargon "macro-synergistic re-purposing monitoring" really mean? It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! STW is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 best-of-breed research and development. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think turn-key. Think B2C2B. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "impactful" really mean? What does the standard industry term "intuitive" really mean? We often benchmark dynamic TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our micro-cross-media re-purposing but our capacity to actualize. What does the jargon-based buzzword "real-world" really mean? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! If you matrix virally, you may have to cultivate macro-wirelessly. The capability to iterate dynamically leads to the power to target efficiently. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? Have you ever needed to utilize your feature set? Free? A company that can embrace defiantly will (someday) be able to transform defiantly. A company that can target elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance courageously. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for coping with unplanned-for platforms? Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. The power to synthesize perfectly leads to the capacity to revolutionize intuitively. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! A company that can deliver correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to syndicate courageously. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? STW practically invented the term "e-markets". Without macro-turn-key paradigms, you will lack subscriber-defined, web-enabled CAD. Think real-time. Think innovative. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will incubate the term "60/60/24/7/365". Without well-planned real-time, six-sigma re-sizing, experiences are forced to become out-of-the-box. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Think real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without communities, you will lack social networks. We realize that it is better to evolve holistically than to aggregate seamlessly. Think ultra-60/24/7/365.