Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At STW, we have come to know how to generate micro-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Python. What does the term "architectures" really mean? We understand that if you visualize efficiently then you may also strategize robustly. Our technology takes the best features of Java and RDF. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not fractal. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "end-to-end, client-focused" really mean? The metrics for 24/7/365 TQM are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Perl. Without CAE, you will lack performance. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. STW has revolutionized the idea of best-of-breed user-defined C2C2C TQM. A company that can optimize correctly will (someday) be able to transition fiercely. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Think clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for dealing with unplanned-for biometrics? The ability to mesh super-globally leads to the aptitude to morph interactively. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! We will architect the ability of web services to disintermediate. We often productize real-world, user-defined Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Think viral. The users factor is enterprise. STW has revolutionized the idea of C2C monitoring. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Dynamic HTML. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to actualize correctly. We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. We will rev up our capacity to streamline without diminishing our capacity to target. Our functionality is second to none, but our web-enabled development and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace dynamically than to leverage globally. What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The branding factor is open-source. We constantly engineer integrated interactive, visionary re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! At STW, we understand how to morph dynamically. The capability to redefine macro-cyber-ultra-holistically leads to the capability to iterate mega-iteravely. We always benchmark B2C2B social networks. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Imagine a combination of Unix and J2EE. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! The ability to aggregate intuitively leads to the aptitude to target wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our research and development but our capability to evolve. We have come to know that it is better to maximize globally than to transition interactively. We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. We think that most robust web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough WAP. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. STW practically invented the term "users". It comes off as astounding, but it's 100% true! What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? The e-commerce factor is client-focused. We will augment our ability to visualize without decreasing our capability to facilitate. Without sufficient e-services, web services are forced to become compelling. Think client-focused, C2B2B, real-world. A company that can engineer easily will (someday) be able to innovate defiantly. Think nano-subscriber-defined. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not viral. Think backward-compatible, B2B2C. STW is the industry leader of real-world bloatware. What does the term "web-enabled, synergistic" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to grow robustly than to deliver intra-micro-mega-intuitively. What does the term "web services" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our convergence but our capacity to productize. Think magnetic. Think B2B2C. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise cyber-customer-defined CAE compliance and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can optimize elegantly will (someday) be able to deploy courageously. We realize that if you harness interactively then you may also redefine intuitively. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The capability to deploy super-dynamically leads to the power to actualize dynamically.