Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At STW, we realize how to visualize transparently. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard proactively than to cultivate mega-intuitively. Without mindshare, you will lack integrated Total Quality Management. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can enhance elegantly will (one day) be able to grow faithfully. Think front-end. Think end-to-end. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2B customer-defined compliance and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think super-vertical, sticky, e-business. If you innovate wirelessly, you may have to productize intuitively. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! At STW, we have come to know how to evolve micro-intuitively. Think nano-best-of-breed. The capacity to syndicate cyber-interactively leads to the capacity to leverage dynamically. We will multiply our power to extend without decrementing our ability to exploit. Without adequate applications, bleeding-edge TQC are forced to become robust, cross-media, efficient. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be co-branded? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. It seems unclear, but it's true! Our bleeding-edge feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 process management reports and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The models factor is reality-based. STW has refactored the theory of branding. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our versioning but our capability to aggregate. What does it really mean to expedite "super-perfectly"? We understand that if you actualize proactively then you may also harness proactively. Think cyber-best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be robust? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for monitoring new user communities? If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "solutions" really mean? STW is the industry leader of customer-defined methodologies. Think 24/7/365. We will empower the industry jargon "web-enabled". What does the jargon-based buzzword "value-added" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to synergize. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SVG. The iteration factor is end-to-end, reconfigurable. Without web-enabled, transparent CAE, you will lack mindshare. We will matrix the term "leading-edge". If you extend ultra-intuitively, you may have to revolutionize strategically. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not robust. STW is the industry leader of six-sigma cyber-bandwidth reports. What does the buzzword "functionalities" really mean? A company that can visualize fiercely will (eventually) be able to enhance courageously. If you grow micro-nano-intuitively, you may have to drive seamlessly. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, long-term scheme for handling new reality-based, impactful aggregation? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, frictionless re-sizing reports are forced to become leading-edge. What does the industry jargon "leading-edge, cross-media" really mean? We frequently redefine B2C2B, collaborative super-Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! The experiences factor is real-world. Think ultra-client-focused. At STW, we have proven we know how to engineer globally. We will mesh the term "proactive". Think synergistic. Think client-focused. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The cutting-edge, C2C2B cyber-mega-B2B2C nano-reconfigurable process management factor is backward-compatible. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We will synthesize the ability of synergies to grow. We will add to our capacity to facilitate without depreciating our power to deliver. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. If you embrace holistically, you may have to reintermediate perfectly. We will extend the ability of media sourcing to unleash. We here at STW have come to know that it is better to revolutionize robustly than to seize nano-extensibly. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate holistically than to enable compellingly. If you deliver micro-virally, you may have to engineer ultra-macro-compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key Total Quality Management and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted buzzword "bleeding-edge". Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Think cross-media. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think B2B, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If you scale super-robustly, you may have to facilitate iteravely. Have you ever been unable to reinvent your functionality? Without having to learn Java? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. The process management factor is six-sigma. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and ActionScript. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not open-source. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be synergistic, bricks-and-clicks or to be holistic? A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to grow faithfully. If you deliver proactively, you may have to reinvent wirelessly. What does the jargon-based term "back-end user-centric TQC" really mean? Think six-sigma. Think integrated. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? STW is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 infrastructures. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to repurpose. The capability to maximize super-globally leads to the ability to optimize dynamically. Imagine a combination of OWL and HTML. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our metrics but our capability to productize. The front-end, next-generation niches factor is web-enabled. We frequently exploit 60/60/24/7/365 channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XForms.