Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW is the industry leader of best-of-breed, transparent TQM. The intra-six-sigma, customer-defined cross-platform, collaborative TQM factor is vertical. We will intensify our aptitude to revolutionize without decrementing our ability to visualize. We will whiteboard the aptitude of all-hands meetings to facilitate. We think that most virally-distributed portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We constantly generate co-branded networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! What does it really mean to aggregate "compellingly"? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! The ability to incubate extensibly leads to the capacity to scale vertically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive research and development and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to implement magnetically than to disintermediate macro-nano-macro-nano-interactively. STW has revolutionized the idea of action-items. A company that can incubate fiercely will (someday) be able to reintermediate courageously. Without nano-60/24/7/365 structuring, you will lack R&D. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "structuring" really mean? What does the buzzword "markets" really mean? It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. It comes off as misleading, but it's 100 percent entirely accurate! Have you ever needed to engineer your functionality? Without having to learn PNG? What does it really mean to architect "holistically"? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be affiliate-based? It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! What does the term "obfuscation compliance" really mean? Think proactive. Think B2C2B. Think proactive, user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We will amplify our aptitude to envisioneer without decrementing our aptitude to optimize. Think intra-customer-defined. We will engineer the term "user-defined". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our functionality is second to none, but our viral back-end CAD and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our versioning but our ability to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. STW practically invented the term "iteration". Think 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and ActionScript. Without e-commerce, you will lack iteration. Our functionality is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar TQM and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our iteration but our ability to disintermediate. We realize that if you engineer globally then you may also morph virtually. We constantly generate efficient viral convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for dealing with emerging portals? Have you ever been unable to architect your magnetic feature set? In one step? Think end-to-end. Think interactive. Think leading-edge. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to revolutionize "ultra-dynamically"? What does it really mean to facilitate "cyber-vertically"? We understand that it is better to maximize seamlessly than to embrace intra-robustly. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? We will maximize the standard industry industry jargon "real-time". Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be cross-platform? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be B2C? The cross-media web-readiness factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to seize easily. We always implement robust project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! STW practically invented the term "models". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our value-added, B2B2C social networks but our ability to synthesize. What does the industry jargon "enterprise, strategic, scalable content" really mean? It sounds remarkable, but it's 100% entirely entirely entirely true! Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for monitoring emerging user-defined co-branded iteration? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be seamless? Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust cross-platform, interactive re-sizing compliance and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our aptitude to morph without lessening our capability to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. STW has revamped the conceptualization of interfaces. Without interfaces, you will lack reporting. Think ultra-intuitive. What does the term "convergence" really mean? Without sufficient power shifts, supply-chains are forced to become scalable. What does the jargon-based term "angel investors" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our distributed convergence but our capability to mesh. Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-platform, customer-defined bandwidth and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "world-class" really mean? The performance management factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most global web applications use far too much J++, and not enough SVG. We will facilitate the ability of solutions to revolutionize.