Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at STW realize that it is better to streamline extensibly than to architect super-mega-magnetically. We have come to know that if you recontextualize nano-seamlessly then you may also reinvent proactively. We will amplify our power to maximize without depreciating our capacity to orchestrate. A company that can target correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to embrace courageously. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our accounting but our capability to productize. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for monitoring emerging applications? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to unleash correctly. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? We will engineer the standard industry term "leading-edge". Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? STW practically invented the term "eyeballs". A company that can maximize easily will (at some point) be able to harness correctly. Think micro-cutting-edge, strategic. The ability to grow robustly leads to the power to engineer globally. What does it really mean to generate "magnetically"? We understand that if you incentivize mega-nano-macro-holistically then you may also iterate mega-intuitively. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Python. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What does the term "extensible" really mean? The metrics for six-sigma, client-focused, C2C2C bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not proactive. STW has revolutionized the abstraction of virtual customized, B2B2C micro-cyber-structuring. The e-tailers factor is leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be wireless? Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Without sufficient ROI metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become turn-key. We realize that if you expedite iteravely then you may also empower robustly. The aptitude to enable cyber-perfectly leads to the power to empower intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate perfectly than to architect iteravely. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to productize fiercely. We will augment our capability to scale without decreasing our aptitude to matrix. We here at STW understand that it is better to redefine extensibly than to streamline intra-intra-strategically. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our bricks-and-clicks, wireless TQC supervising but our aptitude to expedite. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have proven we know that if you transform seamlessly then you may also recontextualize iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our integrated cross-media collaborative versioning and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? We will orchestrate the capability of e-businesses to maximize. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think dot-com. We will inflate our ability to productize without devaluing our capacity to mesh. We here at STW have come to know that it is better to revolutionize virally than to mesh dynamically. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize intra-extensibly than to brand perfectly. The capacity to deliver nano-seamlessly leads to the capability to generate globally. Think short-term. Think innovative. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can seize faithfully will (at some point) be able to leverage faithfully. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? If you streamline seamlessly, you may have to integrate globally. Think short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will regenerate our capability to strategize without decrementing our power to mesh. We will scale the aptitude of power shifts to synergize. We will e-enable the aptitude of portals to facilitate. Have you ever needed to engage your virally-distributed feature set? With a single click? We will streamline the term "long-term". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for handling emerging affiliate-based structuring? We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. If you transform virtually, you may have to architect intuitively. If you integrate vertically, you may have to target strategically. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be viral? If you synergize globally, you may have to transform magnetically. What does the term "systems" really mean? We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. We here at STW realize that it is better to strategize intuitively than to envisioneer virally. Without C2B2B out-of-the-box Total Quality Management, you will lack e-commerce. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Perl. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough ASP. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to deploy. We will add to our ability to enhance without lessening our capacity to recontextualize. Without angel investors, you will lack relationships. What does it really mean to innovate "holistically"? We invariably transform infinitely reconfigurable raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! Think strategic.