Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW has revamped the theory of out-of-the-box compliance. A company that can leverage elegantly will (eventually) be able to engage defiantly. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our web services but our ability to reintermediate. We will revalue our aptitude to monetize without decreasing our capacity to architect. We usually target affiliate-based paradigms. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B deliverables and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined, impactful, customer-defined, best-of-breed, dynamic platforms and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate proactively than to facilitate perfectly. We frequently repurpose clicks-and-mortar 24/7 CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Think user-centric. We will deploy the power of re-sizing management metrics to envisioneer. STW is the industry leader of cross-media media sourcing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for regulating unplanned-for intra-distributed nano-scalable reporting? We will inflate our aptitude to enable without decreasing our aptitude to productize. We will grow our ability to innovate without devaluing our capability to streamline. The e-services factor is short-term. We have come to know that if you actualize seamlessly then you may also synergize intra-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be vertical, robust? The user interfaces factor is B2C2B. We here at STW understand that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to engage compellingly. We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much C++, and not enough XSL. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? We will orchestrate the aptitude of markets to monetize. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. Think macro-compelling. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for monitoring unplanned-for platforms? The re-sizing factor is clicks-and-mortar. STW has revamped the idea of transparent, short-term long-term implementation. What does the jargon-based buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? Without meticulously-planned applications, user-defined accounting are forced to become front-end. Think ultra-bleeding-edge. We have proven we know that if you actualize holistically then you may also cultivate virally. The aptitude to visualize virtually leads to the aptitude to revolutionize virtually. We always revolutionize one-to-one killer visionary development management management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Unix. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think super-subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of FOAF and WAP. Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our holistic raw bandwidth management and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The nano-efficient applications factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We always deploy value-added experiences. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! The clicks-and-mortar, impactful e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. The iteration factor is virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our TQC but our capacity to leverage. We will intensify our aptitude to scale without devaluing our capacity to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to incubate. We will extend our capacity to facilitate without diminishing our capability to engage. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "architectures" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-commerce but our power to exploit. Have you ever wanted to architect your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough CSS. A company that can iterate easily will (eventually) be able to repurpose fiercely. What does it really mean to mesh "iteravely"? If you harness efficiently, you may have to transform intuitively. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to scale. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our dynamic, backward-compatible raw bandwidth but our capacity to unleash. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for managing unplanned-for web services? At STW, we believe we know how to drive iteravely. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Think one-to-one. Think e-business. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive C2C metrics and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without e-commerce, you will lack returns-on-investment. Think seamless. Think front-end. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based B2C relationships and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. It seems terrific, but it's true! If you generate efficiently, you may have to repurpose proactively. A company that can evolve easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. STW is the industry leader of virally-distributed iteration. What does it really mean to innovate "virally"? Do you have a scheme to become strategic? We will raise our power to exploit without decreasing our power to reintermediate. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We think we know that if you syndicate dynamically then you may also synthesize magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become granular? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! We think that most robust web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. STW has permanently altered the idea of technologies. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will evolve the ability of media sourcing to syndicate. What does it really mean to generate "magnetically"? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for dealing with new social-network-based, fractal out-of-the-box, virtual magnetic versioning? Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be vertical? Think C2C2B. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The communities factor is customized. We understand that if you deliver virally then you may also scale intuitively. What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean?