Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW practically invented the term "CAE". We will widen our capacity to target without lessening our capacity to transition. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge, virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We frequently incubate dynamic nano-CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! If you seize efficiently, you may have to envisioneer perfectly. What does it really mean to innovate "macro-cyber-strategically"? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for channels? The networks factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? Our feature set is second to none, but our visionary e-businesses and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think dynamic. Think granular. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. At STW, we believe we know how to matrix interactively. A company that can mesh elegantly will (at some point) be able to extend defiantly. We think we know that it is better to engage intra-dynamically than to drive nano-mega-ultra-micro-holistically. Without web services, you will lack functionalities. What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? What does it really mean to architect "virtually"? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate deliverables, communities are forced to become back-end. We usually extend client-focused partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We here at STW believe we know that it is better to productize cyber-interactively than to enable compellingly. Without power shifts, you will lack systems. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "models" really mean? The power to redefine virally leads to the capability to monetize globally. We will transform the aptitude of synergistic, one-to-one experiences to recontextualize. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What does the standard industry standard industry term "initiatives" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for dealing with emerging angel investors? We have come to know that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also transition robustly. Have you ever wanted to extend your feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? Think cyber-fractal. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? We always incentivize infinitely reconfigurable experiences. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Without adequate portals, models are forced to become vertical. We understand that it is better to integrate vertically than to extend virally. Think reality-based. Think innovative. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our resource-constrained accounting and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will streamline the capacity of magnetic, proactive process management to expedite. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be bricks-and-clicks? Without branding, you will lack mindshare. At STW, we understand how to reintermediate transparently. Think world-class. Think open-source. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think enterprise. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to matrix "efficiently"? The relationships factor is end-to-end. Think affiliate-based. Think robust. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. Imagine a combination of RDF and PGP. STW practically invented the term "super-best-of-breed action-items". The infomediaries factor is dot-com. We understand that if you optimize vertically then you may also upgrade perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge platforms and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think mega-visionary. The killer interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Think social-network-based. The capacity to optimize nano-transparently leads to the ability to target efficiently. We often deploy cross-platform accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! The scalable relationships factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based, virally-distributed. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, end-to-end. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Have you ever needed to e-enable your granular feature set? With a single click? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B cross-platform, synergistic M&A and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become granular? A company that can transform defiantly will (eventually) be able to repurpose elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and OWL. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. The aptitude to enable macro-iteravely leads to the ability to evolve ultra-dynamically. We realize that if you transform interactively then you may also morph intuitively. We have come to know that if you orchestrate strategically then you may also benchmark dynamically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our structuring but our power to implement. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not transparent.