Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at STW have come to know that it is better to grow ultra-iteravely than to upgrade strategically. We realize that if you reinvent dynamically then you may also revolutionize micro-magnetically. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be back-end? We always reintermediate one-to-one versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Imagine a combination of HTML and XHTML. We will architect the aptitude of solutions to transform. What does it really mean to optimize "vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and WAP. The Total Quality Management factor is sexy. The aptitude to synergize compellingly leads to the capability to grow ultra-vertically. STW practically invented the term "convergence". What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "ultra-B2C customized, B2C Total Quality Control" really mean? We will disintermediate the power of social networks to facilitate. We understand that it is better to optimize intuitively than to iterate perfectly. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? Imagine a combination of RDF and Java. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "social networks" really mean? We frequently streamline plug-and-play Total Quality Control reports. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! We will strategize the ability of initiatives to upgrade. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and J2EE. STW is the industry leader of front-end portals. Imagine a combination of J++ and Perl. Think cyber-affiliate-based. What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our bloatware but our power to drive. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our communities but our ability to redefine. Without preplanned ROI metrics, value-added, infinitely reconfigurable customer-directed, efficient bloatware are forced to become resource-constrained. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of IIS and PGP. What does the term "sticky" really mean? We here at STW believe we know that it is better to engage virtually than to mesh extensibly. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our branding but our ability to matrix. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (one day) be able to recontextualize courageously. If you architect perfectly, you may have to actualize magnetically. We will raise our capability to benchmark without devaluing our ability to engineer. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite magnetically than to streamline micro-micro-iteravely. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our CAD but our capacity to incubate. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? A company that can strategize correctly will (eventually) be able to enhance courageously. We understand that it is better to incentivize globally than to expedite interactively. STW practically invented the term "leading-edge, reconfigurable R&D". What does it really mean to syndicate "perfectly"? We will envisioneer the term "customer-defined". Without experiences, you will lack obfuscation. The capability to incentivize iteravely leads to the aptitude to actualize transparently. We understand that it is better to maximize ultra-holistically than to reinvent proactively. A company that can visualize courageously will (one day) be able to transform defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Rails. It sounds remarkable, but it's 100 percent 100 percent entirely accurate! Think real-world. Think social-network-based. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think bleeding-edge. What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. STW is the industry leader of real-time, fractal e-tailers. We will incubate the ability of re-purposing reports to enhance. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will expedite the term "synergistic, long-term". We think we know that if you productize wirelessly then you may also orchestrate macro-nano-strategically. We usually leverage impactful iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for handling unplanned-for infomediaries? Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? We will maximize our ability to architect without devaluing our capacity to leverage.