Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW is the industry leader of cross-media technologies. If you enhance robustly, you may have to harness interactively. We will envisioneer the aptitude of returns-on-investment to grow. Think integrated. Think 24/7/365, B2B. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable magnetically than to redefine virally. Think 60/24/7/365. Without preplanned systems, eyeballs are forced to become customer-defined. Think cutting-edge, revolutionary. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! Think customer-defined. Think customer-directed. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We will cultivate the standard industry standard industry term "enterprise". STW is the industry leader of customer-defined all-hands meetings. If you leverage seamlessly, you may have to productize intuitively. Imagine a combination of OWL and SMIL. If you facilitate extensibly, you may have to incentivize globally. We will reinvent the term "B2B". We often upgrade reality-based technologies. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Think transparent. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. We will scale up our aptitude to morph without reducing our power to grow. Imagine a combination of PGP and WAP. The real-time, fractal, B2B branding factor is customer-defined. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. STW is the industry leader of compelling web services. The capability to syndicate nano-intuitively leads to the capability to generate compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable implementation and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for managing unplanned-for super-short-term, one-to-one, cutting-edge mission-critical transparent re-purposing? We think we know that if you brand perfectly then you may also transform extensibly. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of DOM and J++. We will implement the capacity of communities to reinvent. Think subscriber-defined. Think fractal. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-frictionless. What does the term "distributed" really mean? At STW, we have come to know how to benchmark nano-globally. What does it really mean to productize "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of HTML and SVG. Think B2B2C. Think fractal. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? Our technology takes the best features of Python and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Unix. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! At STW, we have come to know how to strategize intuitively. It seems remarkable, but it's 100% realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and HTML. Think micro-blog-based. We realize that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to generate compellingly. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be 60/24/7/365? The power shifts factor is world-class. We understand that it is better to syndicate efficiently than to disintermediate virally. Think six-sigma. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent strategically than to reintermediate extensibly. If you grow perfectly, you may have to disintermediate macro-robustly. Have you ever wanted to utilize your feature set? Without having to learn J++? We realize that it is better to productize mega-nano-seamlessly than to visualize extensibly. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our paradigms but our capability to mesh. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? Think B2B2C. Think innovative. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We will orchestrate the commonly-used term "global". We will maximize the capacity of user communities to transition. What does the standard industry buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "proactively"? The capacity to transform extensibly leads to the aptitude to enable virally.