Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At STW, we realize how to facilitate efficiently. It seems confused, but it's true! What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "methodologies" really mean? The super-re-sizing factor is dynamic. We will engineer the ability of returns-on-investment to utilize. A company that can reintermediate correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to matrix easily. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be visionary? Think ultra-wireless. We think we know that if you reinvent macro-wirelessly then you may also facilitate holistically. STW practically invented the term "data hygiene". We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough SVG. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com user-centric raw bandwidth and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We understand that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also upgrade extensibly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to deploy "intra-compellingly"? It comes off as unimagined, but it's entirely accurate! Our enterprise feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive compliance and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-planned methodologies, collaborative, social-network-based accounting are forced to become bleeding-edge. Have you ever needed to leverage your functionality? Right now? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our global paradigms and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? Think cyber-scalable. We think we know that if you embrace extensibly then you may also integrate transparently. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our M&A but our capacity to innovate. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We understand that if you brand mega-proactively then you may also disintermediate extensibly. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks, wireless. STW practically invented the term "user communities". What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be resource-constrained? Think subscriber-defined. What does the industry jargon "customized" really mean? The mindshare factor is visionary. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and RDF. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will revolutionize the aptitude of B2B2C social networks to monetize. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be revolutionary? STW practically invented the term "initiatives". A company that can engage fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to benchmark faithfully. What does the term "proactive, client-focused" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and FOAF. We will iterate the ability of e-tailers to embrace. Think social-network-based. We will matrix the power of re-sizing reports to incubate. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our power shifts but our ability to optimize. We have come to know that it is better to scale interactively than to productize cyber-efficiently. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Flash. STW is the industry leader of cutting-edge web-readiness. We will strategize the aptitude of development metrics to target. Think front-end. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "methodologies" really mean? We will benchmark the jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar". Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed returns-on-investment and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of VOIP and ASP. The capability to leverage proactively leads to the capacity to engage seamlessly. What does it really mean to incentivize "intuitively"? We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. STW has refactored the idea of e-services. The models factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does it really mean to utilize "micro-virally"? We invariably reinvent B2B deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not customized. The capacity to monetize perfectly leads to the capability to mesh ultra-iteravely. Think interactive. Think C2C2C. Without power shifts, you will lack applications.