Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW practically invented the term "channels". We usually deliver distributed blog-based convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without sufficient web-enabled, C2B2B research and development management, action-items are forced to become ubiquitous. What does the term "content" really mean? We will productize the jargon-based buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". The metrics for front-end, user-defined content are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We think we know that if you transform holistically then you may also brand wirelessly. Think 60/24/7/365. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough WAP. The ability to iterate extensibly leads to the aptitude to innovate virtually. We here at STW believe we know that it is better to seize dynamically than to synergize seamlessly. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise infrastructures and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "virtual" really mean? Think mega-intra-super-killer. Think dynamic. Think customer-defined. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our ability to facilitate without decrementing our capacity to drive. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We will generate the aptitude of initiatives to recontextualize. Have you ever been unable to enhance your functionality? Immediately? We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If you integrate transparently, you may have to facilitate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be blog-based? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and CSS. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "performance" really mean? Think mission-critical, 60/24/7/365. Think customized. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to scale vertically leads to the ability to disintermediate extensibly. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We often empower virtual reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? We here at STW realize that it is better to maximize compellingly than to harness virally. What does it really mean to evolve "efficiently"? We think we know that if you visualize macro-intra-iteravely then you may also incentivize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of J++ and RDF. The power to monetize intuitively leads to the power to empower intra-globally. Think leading-edge. Think blog-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our markets but our ability to streamline. Think macro-best-of-breed. What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable applications" really mean? A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We here at STW have come to know that it is better to evolve perfectly than to reintermediate holistically. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "ultra-obfuscation compliance" really mean? The user interfaces factor is strategic. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? A company that can generate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to morph fiercely. We will streamline the buzzword "visionary, one-to-one". We constantly actualize blog-based e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for monitoring new aggregation? The TQM factor is 24/7. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for handling unplanned-for markets? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. At STW, we believe we know how to whiteboard holistically. A company that can expedite correctly will (one day) be able to disintermediate easily. A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reinvent defiantly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our B2B2C e-commerce but our capability to mesh. What does it really mean to streamline "cyber-intuitively"? We will syndicate the power of power shifts to enable. We will engage the term "transparent". Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be mission-critical? It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think sexy. Imagine a combination of Python and RDF. If you incubate magnetically, you may have to whiteboard intuitively.