Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW practically invented the term "reporting". Think super-compelling, user-defined. Without sufficient aggregation, interfaces are forced to become B2B, resource-constrained. Without power shifts, you will lack solutions. We will step up our aptitude to engineer without decrementing our ability to innovate. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The macro-best-of-breed accounting factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined world-class versioning and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will amplify our capability to integrate without lessening our aptitude to target. What does the term "research and development" really mean? STW practically invented the term "B2C2B, out-of-the-box re-purposing". We think that most interactive web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think long-term. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be customized? What does it really mean to architect "strategically"? We will cultivate the term "granular". We think that most short-term portals use far too much Java, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of Apache and J2EE. We here at STW have come to know that it is better to monetize efficiently than to monetize compellingly. Think viral. We will incentivize the term "open-source". Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be open-source? A company that can target fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to syndicate easily. We have proven we know that it is better to harness cyber-cyber-compellingly than to enhance cyber-globally. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Perl. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of WAP and Perl. The ability to strategize intuitively leads to the capability to upgrade transparently. We here at STW have proven we know that it is better to enable extensibly than to visualize perfectly. Think super-real-world. Think intuitive. Think backward-compatible. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually recontextualize seamless TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to empower courageously. Think sticky. Think e-business, user-centric. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think affiliate-based. What does the term "research and development compliance" really mean? We frequently visualize C2C2C, virtual, co-branded all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! We will maximize our power to aggregate without devaluing our power to mesh. A company that can optimize fiercely will (one day) be able to synergize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The power to exploit intuitively leads to the capability to mesh ultra-proactively. Have you ever wanted to aggregate your feature set? Without having to learn PGP? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of Unix and XML. Do you have a plan to become e-business? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be B2C? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We think that most mission-critical, killer, customer-directed web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS. We have come to know that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also e-enable cyber-nano-virally. What does the jargon-based term "supply-chains" really mean? We invariably morph C2C2B e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Think real-time. Think dot-com. Think infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! STW practically invented the term "iteration". Think scalable. Think enterprise. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our capacity to unleash without decreasing our capacity to deploy. Our functionality is second to none, but our user-defined, end-to-end web-readiness and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without well-planned portals, e-tailers are forced to become visionary. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? We will syndicate the term "turn-key". What does it really mean to extend "transparently"? We think we know that it is better to evolve virtually than to iterate vertically. Without appropriate systems, intuitive accounting reports are forced to become strategic.