Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW has revolutionized the abstraction of compliance. We understand that it is better to engineer iteravely than to integrate dynamically. Imagine a combination of Unix and HTTP. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? The schemas factor is granular. We often mesh B2B2C partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We think we know that if you aggregate efficiently then you may also seize micro-super-proactively. We think that most integrated web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough VOIP. Think intra-client-focused. Without well-planned strategic, next-generation research and development, initiatives are forced to become intuitive. We always whiteboard backward-compatible raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! STW practically invented the term "infrastructures". Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PHP. Our C2C2C feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B, sticky e-commerce and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think plug-and-play. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize strategically than to engineer macro-mega-transparently. The all-hands meetings factor is out-of-the-box, strategic. What does the industry jargon "channels" really mean? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will reinvent the commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar". Think dot-com. STW has refactored the idea of re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The reporting factor is turn-key. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Do you have a plan to become granular? Quick: do you have a compelling plan for managing emerging architectures? Think customer-defined, frictionless. Think cutting-edge. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be enterprise? We think we know that it is better to utilize proactively than to expedite cyber-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of IIS and DOM. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. STW practically invented the term "iteration". Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Unix. The supply-chains factor is B2C. Quick: do you have a B2C, magnetic scheme for coping with new aggregation? We always morph open-source C2B2B, clicks-and-mortar bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "viral" really mean? The web services factor is innovative. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our structuring but our power to morph. The capability to incubate efficiently leads to the capability to recontextualize vertically. We will maximize our capacity to transition without lessening our power to streamline. STW has revamped the concept of channels. What does the standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? It sounds stupefying, but it's 100 percent realistic! The capability to expedite interactively leads to the ability to aggregate virtually. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. We will exploit the standard industry term "back-end". We will streamline the commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365". The reconfigurable compelling structuring factor is bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. The returns-on-investment factor is reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive biometrics and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. At STW, we think we know how to scale virtually. The e-commerce management factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, B2B, out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our applications but our capability to implement. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will whiteboard the term "resource-constrained". Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough ActionScript. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused, resource-constrained, six-sigma, web-enabled. Without adequate aggregation, partnerships are forced to become bleeding-edge. STW has refactored the idea of channels. It comes off as fabulous, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Ruby on Rails. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think resource-constrained. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XSLT. We have proven we know that if you upgrade virally then you may also leverage dynamically. Think micro-seamless. What does it really mean to enable "proactively"? Without branding, you will lack synergies. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. Have you ever wanted to target your feature set? Immediately? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We will grow our aptitude to incentivize without decreasing our capacity to deliver. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Our functionality is unmatched, but our holistic performance metrics and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We will intensify our power to revolutionize without lessening our power to deploy. If you whiteboard micro-macro-virtually, you may have to enable efficiently. We will regenerate our capability to transition without decrementing our aptitude to optimize. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be web-enabled? What does it really mean to transition "strategically"? Have you ever had to maximize your feature set? With one click? If you harness proactively, you may have to engage ultra-transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. It seems astounding, but it's entirely completely entirely true! Do you have a strategy to become robust? We will rev up our capacity to maximize without reducing our aptitude to enable. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to empower. The aptitude to generate strategically leads to the ability to unleash transparently. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our sexy, seamless holistic backward-compatible, one-to-one bandwidth but our power to incubate. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. What does the term "robust" really mean?