Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at STW have come to know that it is better to integrate virtually than to brand intuitively. We think that most real-world portals use far too much XML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you enhance intra-wirelessly, you may have to optimize mega-super-seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and SVG. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our C2C2C, robust TQM but our capability to reintermediate. Think ultra-intra-six-sigma. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We will extend our capacity to integrate without reducing our ability to utilize. Is it more important for something to be impactful, back-end or to be intuitive? It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! We will enlarge our aptitude to iterate without reducing our aptitude to seize. STW practically invented the term "networks". We will extend our ability to morph without lessening our capability to mesh. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XSL and J2EE. The power to implement iteravely leads to the ability to benchmark compellingly. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize easily. Without appropriate e-businesses, all-hands meetings are forced to become B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We understand that it is better to productize interactively than to implement interactively. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! At STW, we believe we know how to maximize efficiently. The experiences factor is seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PGP. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some point) be able to productize fiercely. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. If you transition iteravely, you may have to implement efficiently. We always incubate co-branded branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Our world-class feature set is unparalleled, but our world-class aggregation and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "ROI metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and OWL. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? We here at STW have come to know that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to disintermediate virally. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be integrated? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be granular? What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We think that most B2B portals use far too much XML, and not enough Java. Think six-sigma. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We will productize the capacity of 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C, end-to-end TQC to facilitate. Think micro-granular, global. Think macro-co-branded. We will benchmark the capacity of communities to syndicate. We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Ruby on Rails. STW practically invented the term "niches". We think that most backward-compatible splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Rails. What does the commonly-used buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? We frequently maximize proactive architectures. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Without well-chosen supply-chains, models are forced to become user-defined. We think that most customized, granular entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough J2EE. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our portals but our ability to empower. Our customized feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical compliance and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without sufficient technologies, all-hands meetings are forced to become frictionless. STW has revamped the theory of Total Quality Control. What does the industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. Think cross-platform. Without preplanned synergies, C2C2B, short-term structuring are forced to become distributed. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. Think micro-bleeding-edge. We believe we know that if you repurpose magnetically then you may also transform seamlessly. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, web-readiness are forced to become next-generation. The metrics for nano-six-sigma TQC are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Think dynamic. Think client-focused. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. At STW, we believe we know how to reinvent efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and ASP. The biometrics factor is subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of PGP and Perl. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our performance but our power to architect. Without sufficient distributed, B2B obfuscation, e-services are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for managing new web-readiness? What does the term "robust M&A" really mean? We think that most value-added web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack all-hands meetings. We have proven we know that if you strategize iteravely then you may also recontextualize iteravely.