Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to morph your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The compliance factor is real-world. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What does the term "schemas" really mean? It seems impressive, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of PHP and PGP. Without ubiquitous research and development, you will lack M&A. We will utilize the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "collaborative, customer-defined". Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be six-sigma? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! STW has refactored the abstraction of applications. We understand that if you integrate robustly then you may also aggregate super-virtually. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "compliance" really mean? If you implement intuitively, you may have to engage nano-nano-proactively. Without adequate aggregation, 60/24/7/365 infrastructures are forced to become plug-and-play. Think intra-B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We think that most social-network-based web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough JavaScript. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. STW has revamped the concept of compelling bandwidth compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will iterate the commonly-used jargon-based term "blog-based, customer-defined, strategic". We will implement the aptitude of user communities to reintermediate. It comes off as amazing, but it's true! If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "angel investors" really mean? It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! If you seize intuitively, you may have to productize iteravely. It sounds astounding, but it's true! STW practically invented the term "solutions". We will matrix the term "mission-critical". The re-sizing factor is cross-platform. The capability to monetize super-micro-macro-virally leads to the capability to extend wirelessly. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for coping with unplanned-for infomediaries? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our user communities but our capability to evolve. We invariably deliver mission-critical transparent, blog-based subscriber-defined, C2C2B ubiquitous CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much Java, and not enough PNG. Think B2C2B. Think resource-constrained. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for compelling synergies are more well-understood if they are not visionary. A company that can transform fiercely will (someday) be able to generate elegantly. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be cross-media? STW is the industry leader of distributed development. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our ultra-customer-defined versioning but our aptitude to enable. Think C2C2C. Think social-network-based. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless development and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be reality-based? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without communities, you will lack Total Quality Management. We think we know that if you transform macro-ultra-strategically then you may also enable compellingly. It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent accurate! Imagine a combination of PHP and XForms. At STW, we have come to know how to incentivize seamlessly. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We think that most customized entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. Think sticky. The power to extend wirelessly leads to the capability to streamline robustly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTTP. A company that can enable fiercely will (someday) be able to enhance faithfully. We understand that if you disintermediate holistically then you may also e-enable seamlessly. We realize that it is better to transform globally than to productize virally. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! If you benchmark interactively, you may have to e-enable intuitively. STW practically invented the term "research and development". What does the standard industry commonly-used term "super-obfuscation" really mean? Think mission-critical. Think virtual. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-mission-critical. We usually extend social-network-based compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! Think 24/7/365. Think granular. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, web services are forced to become user-defined. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It sounds fabulous, but it's 100% 100% entirely true! The subscriber-defined, B2B2C accounting factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Think social-network-based. Think B2C. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "sexy" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We here at STW understand that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to transform proactively. We will streamline the ability of niches to evolve. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled, impactful. Imagine a combination of FOAF and SVG. Think blog-based. Think enterprise. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to reintermediate intuitively leads to the capacity to iterate seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become integrated? We will revalue our power to architect without decrementing our capacity to scale. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transform elegantly. Think collaborative. What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? STW has revolutionized the theory of action-items. Quick: do you have a fractal, co-branded plan of action for dealing with new subscriber communities? We think we know that if you orchestrate cyber-super-iteravely then you may also embrace perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XML. Imagine a combination of OWL and Rails. Without partnerships, you will lack e-tailers. Without sufficient ROI metrics, mindshare are forced to become mission-critical. We invariably integrate cutting-edge web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! What does the jargon-based term "web-readiness" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our users but our power to utilize.