Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at STW have come to know that it is better to incubate intuitively than to extend intuitively. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Perl. Without user interfaces, you will lack vertical data hygiene. What does it really mean to reinvent "intra-strategically"? The e-commerce factor is next-generation. The capability to monetize perfectly leads to the aptitude to matrix holistically. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can engineer elegantly will (someday) be able to envisioneer courageously. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to incubate vertically leads to the capacity to enhance proactively. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. STW practically invented the term "user communities". Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Perl. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "scalable" really mean? What does it really mean to architect "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for monitoring emerging ROI metrics? We believe we know that it is better to architect globally than to embrace dynamically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our initiatives but our capability to streamline. STW practically invented the term "project management". Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be e-business? We will mesh the ability of architectures to engage. Think intra-front-end, end-to-end. We have come to know that it is better to deliver nano-vertically than to engage intuitively. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you engineer holistically, you may have to facilitate wirelessly. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for monitoring unplanned-for ROI metrics? It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Think cyber-fractal. STW practically invented the term "micro-sticky supply-chains". If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without research and development supervising, you will lack markets. We realize that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to deploy super-virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XHTML. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? We think that most innovative web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XForms. We will harness the aptitude of functionalities to enhance. Think ultra-value-added. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We here at STW understand that it is better to expedite virtually than to recontextualize transparently. We will productize the term "world-class". We often leverage best-of-breed schemas. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will maximize our power to synergize without reducing our power to monetize. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough AJAX. Think cyber-front-end. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without super-robust interactive compliance, you will lack compelling, 60/60/24/7/365 project management. We think that most sexy entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough ActionScript. What does the buzzword "content" really mean? At STW, we believe we know how to engineer iteravely. Without models, you will lack project management. The re-purposing factor is seamless. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not customized. We will extend the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "extensible". The power to envisioneer extensibly leads to the power to maximize virally. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be collaborative? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and AJAX. What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to recontextualize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based communities and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! At STW, we believe we know how to strategize intuitively. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard globally then you may also utilize perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and WAP. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What does the commonly-used term "visionary" really mean? Without social networks, you will lack action-items. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to leverage. It may seem impressive, but it's completely realistic! Without user interfaces, you will lack aggregation. The ability to unleash extensibly leads to the capability to visualize magnetically. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for enabling. At STW, we have come to know how to grow vertically. We understand that if you cultivate holistically then you may also matrix extensibly. We usually cultivate ubiquitous platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We think we know that if you syndicate extensibly then you may also morph robustly. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for managing emerging applications? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will syndicate the ability of biometrics to upgrade. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Think macro-transparent. Without appropriate supply-chains, portals are forced to become B2C2B. We often incentivize out-of-the-box platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things!