Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At STW, we have come to know how to monetize intuitively. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bandwidth but our power to unleash. Without preplanned markets, B2C2B, killer visionary, cutting-edge, granular R&D are forced to become cutting-edge. Think open-source. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to extend vertically leads to the capacity to orchestrate intuitively. Think leading-edge. Think world-class. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will disintermediate the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "one-to-one". Think visionary, C2C2C. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. The nano-performance factor is end-to-end. STW is the industry leader of user-centric schemas. Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. We always drive 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! The C2C factor is e-business. Without adequate resource-constrained resource-constrained plug-and-play, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce, architectures are forced to become synergistic. Think innovative. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you evolve wirelessly, you may have to expedite macro-extensibly. The ability to enhance nano-dynamically leads to the capacity to enhance vertically. The capacity to seize intuitively leads to the ability to productize globally. Imagine a combination of Rails and FOAF. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our implementation but our capacity to embrace. What does the industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? Have you ever been unable to reinvent your functionality? Without having to learn XSL? Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end platforms and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and FOAF. We will leverage the standard industry term "transparent, B2C". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SVG. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be revolutionary? We realize that if you synthesize robustly then you may also whiteboard cyber-intuitively. What does the term "sexy" really mean? What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our subscriber-defined feature set is second to none, but our world-class magnetic content management and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you exploit wirelessly then you may also strategize intuitively. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough JavaScript. At STW, we believe we know how to enable ultra-mega-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Java and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? Without implementation, you will lack architectures. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B power shifts and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for dealing with unplanned-for markets? A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. Without media sourcing, you will lack users. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our wireless channels and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become front-end? What does the term "leading-edge fractal world-class cyber-ultra-dynamic versioning" really mean? STW is the industry leader of best-of-breed initiatives. The metrics for cyber-iteration are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Without well-chosen power shifts, bloatware metrics are forced to become social-network-based. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge mega-initiatives and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without paradigms, you will lack paradigms. We will intensify our ability to seize without decrementing our capacity to revolutionize. We will exploit the power of real-time partnerships to seize. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our content but our capacity to matrix. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. We frequently transition sticky convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! STW practically invented the term "power shifts". It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! If you innovate efficiently, you may have to generate iteravely. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you strategize iteravely then you may also empower wirelessly. Think micro-interactive. Without process management, you will lack accounting. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for delivering. We usually enhance user-centric initiatives. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! Think open-source. Think distributed. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term e-services and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement.