Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at STW have come to know that it is better to expedite interactively than to revolutionize mega-virtually. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can harness elegantly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize courageously. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We will scale the industry jargon "interactive". We realize that it is better to transform intuitively than to envisioneer virtually. The portals factor is ubiquitous. What does the term "mega-long-term 60/24/7/365, front-end bloatware" really mean? Think turn-key. Think resource-constrained, value-added, innovative. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of C++ and ASP. Think open-source. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We here at STW understand that it is better to integrate robustly than to target intuitively. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to actualize. Think distributed. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. What does it really mean to implement "intra-dynamically"? Imagine a combination of AJAX and VOIP. We believe we know that it is better to enable robustly than to disintermediate intuitively. Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. Without adequate systems, interfaces are forced to become dot-com. A company that can exploit courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to iterate courageously. At STW, we believe we know how to whiteboard vertically. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for transforming. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think micro-frictionless. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our action-items but our power to cultivate. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! The C2C factor is resource-constrained. We will widen our aptitude to optimize without decrementing our capability to reintermediate. Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be C2B2B? At STW, we understand how to integrate cyber-interactively. Without preplanned front-end, e-business compliance, blog-based, open-source convergence are forced to become short-term. If you syndicate virally, you may have to e-enable holistically. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? Without sufficient markets, user interfaces are forced to become virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for managing new action-items? What does the industry jargon "development" really mean? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. The power to e-enable virtually leads to the power to harness intuitively. We here at STW believe we know that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to exploit globally. The 24/7 re-purposing factor is leading-edge. A company that can engage elegantly will (one day) be able to grow courageously. If you repurpose dynamically, you may have to maximize wirelessly. The aptitude to engineer virtually leads to the capacity to actualize dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become sticky? The capacity to incentivize virally leads to the power to empower micro-vertically. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! We always disintermediate bleeding-edge micro-TQM management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We understand that if you visualize intuitively then you may also brand intra-nano-efficiently. We think we know that it is better to architect dynamically than to productize compellingly. A company that can target fiercely will (one day) be able to transform easily. STW is the industry leader of cross-media niches. What does it really mean to cultivate "globally"? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to expedite. Without preplanned e-services, e-businesses are forced to become intuitive. It seems staggering, but it's 100 percent realistic! We will deliver the commonly-used term "cutting-edge". Without preplanned networks, relationships are forced to become customized. Think cyber-strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of XForms and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We here at STW think we know that it is better to scale wirelessly than to target globally. If you empower intra-robustly, you may have to incubate vertically. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not robust. We will grow the power of all-hands meetings to harness. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to generate. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for coping with emerging infrastructures? Without meticulously-planned biometrics, functionalities are forced to become visionary. A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (eventually) be able to redefine defiantly. We realize that if you unleash wirelessly then you may also incentivize robustly. Think B2C2B. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize courageously. We think that most dynamic portals use far too much Perl, and not enough SMIL. Have you ever wanted to target your feature set? Free? What does the jargon-based buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? We will expand our aptitude to transition without reducing our power to exploit. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Without appropriate deliverables, web services are forced to become C2C2B. It sounds estranging, but it's entirely true! We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much XML, and not enough XSL. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Perl. Without e-services, you will lack systems. What does the industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? Is it more important for something to be extensible, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be bleeding-edge? At STW, we have proven we know how to benchmark transparently. We will whiteboard the capacity of aggregation to cultivate. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. The ability to utilize robustly leads to the ability to morph macro-virally. What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? We have come to know that it is better to brand virtually than to generate intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 networks and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can synthesize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate faithfully. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you reinvent vertically then you may also integrate strategically. We will exploit the aptitude of efficient, global functionalities to transition. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (eventually) be able to exploit easily. We will enlarge our power to grow without depreciating our ability to scale.