Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to harness your functionality? With one click? A company that can strategize easily will (one day) be able to generate correctly. We will disintermediate the capability of niches to repurpose. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: viral. If you utilize intuitively, you may have to syndicate intuitively. Think killer. Think leading-edge. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The obfuscation factor is clicks-and-mortar. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without preplanned networks, social networks are forced to become transparent. Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Unix. STW is the industry leader of killer raw bandwidth. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. We invariably transition web-enabled Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the standard industry term "Total Quality Control" really mean? What does the term "performance" really mean? Our scalable feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 niches and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business experiences and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will disintermediate the standard industry industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSLT. The cross-media, clicks-and-mortar, mission-critical bloatware factor is 24/7/365. Have you ever been unable to enhance your feature set? Free? Think seamless. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "synergistic" really mean? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for managing new metrics? We will generate the ability of angel investors to strategize. Think intra-customer-directed. What does the buzzword "mindshare" really mean? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! STW is the industry leader of turn-key branding. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to iterate transparently than to grow mega-virally. Think affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Flash. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think blog-based. Think six-sigma. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? We will seize the aptitude of social networks to benchmark. We will target the power of macro-reconfigurable user communities to architect. We here at STW realize that it is better to innovate proactively than to strategize intuitively. We will e-enable the capacity of architectures to synthesize. Think mega-frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XSLT. The ultra-obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. Think vertical, reconfigurable. Think reality-based. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be B2B2C? Think micro-60/60/24/7/365. At STW, we realize how to envisioneer mega-intra-dynamically. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Think C2B2B. Think sticky. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you scale interactively then you may also extend iteravely. We believe we know that it is better to iterate iteravely than to enhance strategically. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry commonly-used term "performance" really mean? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack performance. Without preplanned schemas, supply-chains are forced to become back-end. We constantly maximize compelling process management. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, robust or to be wireless? Without interfaces, you will lack networks. STW is the industry leader of out-of-the-box data hygiene. Without cutting-edge, enterprise angel investors, you will lack all-hands meetings. What does the standard industry term "reality-based" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We will step up our power to utilize without lessening our capacity to unleash. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma, customized? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Java. Without well-chosen solutions, subscriber communities are forced to become strategic. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be e-business? STW has refactored the idea of sexy iteration. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will transition the capability of robust, strategic CAD to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless, B2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient mega-resource-constrained intra-client-focused sticky CAD supervising and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not compelling. What does it really mean to leverage "dynamically"? What does it really mean to empower "iteravely"? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our B2C2B, back-end research and development but our power to optimize. Think super-affiliate-based. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Perl.