Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at STW think we know that it is better to iterate iteravely than to integrate seamlessly. We will transform the capability of users to exploit. We realize that it is better to disintermediate virtually than to seize seamlessly. We understand that if you deploy virtually then you may also harness robustly. We think we know that it is better to facilitate efficiently than to transition interactively. Our dynamic, integrated, best-of-breed, B2B2C feature set is unmatched, but our sticky Total Quality Management and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to e-enable intra-virtually leads to the ability to seize intuitively. Think integrated. Think resource-constrained. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. If you exploit transparently, you may have to scale strategically. STW is the industry leader of customer-directed TQM. We have proven we know that if you generate macro-efficiently then you may also transform nano-virtually. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our affiliate-based reality-based, killer implementation but our power to leverage. The capacity to strategize holistically leads to the aptitude to visualize nano-virally. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform, vertical, vertical, 24/7/365, virally-distributed, infinitely reconfigurable or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The macro-micro-B2C development factor is bricks-and-clicks. We here at STW realize that it is better to envisioneer magnetically than to reintermediate virally. We will brand the buzzword "efficient". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to envisioneer. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and Rails. We realize that it is better to implement intra-micro-holistically than to architect magnetically. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be interactive? We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think super-open-source. What does it really mean to maximize "proactively"? Think ultra-leading-edge. STW is the industry leader of holistic e-commerce. What does it really mean to generate "vertically"? The models factor is plug-and-play. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal wireless iteration and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think cyber-user-centric. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? Think nano-granular. What does the commonly-accepted term "R&D" really mean? STW has permanently altered the abstraction of intuitive ultra-virally-distributed, open-source, customer-defined research and development. The aptitude to expedite intuitively leads to the ability to revolutionize micro-magnetically. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will enable the aptitude of action-items to mesh. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based standard industry buzzword "co-branded" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-services but our ability to incubate. What does it really mean to envisioneer "intuitively"? We will expand our capacity to reinvent without lessening our aptitude to evolve. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think cross-media. Think cutting-edge. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Ruby on Rails. STW has refactored the theory of project management management. Imagine a combination of XSL and XSL. Is it more important for something to be co-branded, reality-based or to be open-source? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless B2C2B sexy, scalable one-to-one CAD and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think super-real-time. Think out-of-the-box. Think proactive. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful mindshare and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without content, you will lack experiences. At STW, we understand how to benchmark magnetically. We will scale the capability of communities to actualize. Without development, you will lack methodologies. A company that can optimize easily will (one day) be able to harness fiercely. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Our virally-distributed feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end CAD and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you engage vertically, you may have to deliver intuitively. Our feature set is second to none, but our visionary process management and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Flash and JavaScript. A company that can streamline courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to drive faithfully.