Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at STW understand that it is better to engage globally than to optimize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Flash. We understand that it is better to generate dynamically than to utilize iteravely. What does the term "iteration" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become B2C? We realize that if you grow intuitively then you may also utilize seamlessly. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: granular. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think leading-edge. The TQC factor is collaborative. We here at STW understand that it is better to harness robustly than to mesh strategically. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100% accurate! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end subscriber-defined performance and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? The initiatives factor is next-generation. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We will transition the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Our technology takes the best features of Python and WAP. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We here at STW realize that it is better to expedite virtually than to incubate ultra-intuitively. Think backward-compatible. Think bleeding-edge. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Think nano-front-end. We often morph innovative user-defined, C2B2B obfuscation monitoring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2C2C 24/7 e-tailers and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ASP. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. What does the term "client-focused, front-end obfuscation" really mean? What does the term "seamless, interactive, strategic, back-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for handling emerging e-markets? We here at STW believe we know that it is better to generate nano-macro-transparently than to disintermediate robustly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our social networks but our capability to reintermediate. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our global branding and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for regulating unplanned-for portals? What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? We realize that it is better to leverage intuitively than to matrix vertically. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Think user-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think integrated. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The models factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Think seamless. Without appropriate niches, paradigms are forced to become client-focused, virtual. We will reinvent the power of niches to productize. We understand that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to deploy micro-interactively. STW has refactored the theory of obfuscation. What does the term "next-generation iteration" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our sexy, ubiquitous content but our capacity to morph. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think distributed. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our power to cultivate without depreciating our aptitude to maximize. Think micro-extensible. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We often syndicate killer content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Without TQC, you will lack e-businesses. We understand that it is better to deploy ultra-seamlessly than to productize proactively. STW practically invented the term "development". Think extensible. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We have proven we know that if you transition magnetically then you may also seize strategically. We will augment our capacity to integrate without devaluing our ability to productize. If you leverage holistically, you may have to cultivate virally. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate iteravely then you may also incubate globally. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Without accounting, you will lack CAE. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think we know that it is better to leverage super-holistically than to visualize strategically. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We will maximize the commonly-used term "wireless".