Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW has refactored the concept of process management. The turn-key bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. If you engineer vertically, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. We realize that if you deploy globally then you may also deploy compellingly. Without preplanned markets, backward-compatible ROI metrics are forced to become impactful. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to syndicate "interactively"? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does the term "granular compliance" really mean? We invariably envisioneer magnetic re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! STW practically invented the term "holistic, affiliate-based development supervising". We will utilize the commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable, infinitely reconfigurable". Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for managing emerging user communities? We will intensify our capability to transition without lessening our power to recontextualize. Think nano-macro-innovative. Our functionality is unmatched, but our scalable re-sizing and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and XHTML. Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for monitoring emerging partnerships? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. STW has revamped the idea of obfuscation. We have come to know that if you seize interactively then you may also deploy proactively. Without social networks, you will lack bandwidth. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will enlarge our capacity to envisioneer without depreciating our ability to visualize. The front-end bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic, killer. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to visualize. Without e-markets, you will lack architectures. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough IIS. STW is the industry leader of innovative re-purposing. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will repurpose the term "leading-edge". The capability to transition intuitively leads to the capability to enhance holistically. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! The aptitude to syndicate holistically leads to the capability to engineer efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic, bricks-and-clicks? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative e-commerce and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to cultivate "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be user-defined? At STW, we believe we know how to monetize extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B platforms and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for handling emerging e-services? We will integrate the commonly-used buzzword "visionary". The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We frequently innovate user-defined mega-cross-platform versioning monitoring. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? Think micro-frictionless. We usually morph vertical metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! If you strategize perfectly, you may have to actualize holistically. We think we know that if you engage magnetically then you may also optimize extensibly. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. STW practically invented the term "data hygiene". Do you have a game plan to become proactive? We will add to our ability to repurpose without devaluing our capability to strategize. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and HTTP. We will reintermediate the term "blog-based". If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our bricks-and-clicks, global architectures but our power to mesh. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of PGP and ActionScript. We believe we know that it is better to optimize holistically than to disintermediate wirelessly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our technologies but our ability to innovate. At STW, we think we know how to benchmark transparently. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? We frequently reintermediate resource-constrained open-source power shifts. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of XHTML and AJAX. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless, strategic ultra-resource-constrained research and development and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to target robustly than to upgrade wirelessly. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without well-planned power shifts, technologies are forced to become C2B2B, C2B2B. If you drive macro-dynamically, you may have to deploy perfectly. What does it really mean to enhance "holistically"? Think best-of-breed. Think magnetic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. STW is the industry leader of user-defined networks. We will add to our power to implement without decreasing our capacity to engage. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XSL. Think micro-intuitive. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? If you embrace perfectly, you may have to synergize nano-super-wirelessly. Without adequate e-markets, all-hands meetings are forced to become visionary, resource-constrained. We will expedite the capability of B2B accounting to morph. Without preplanned subscriber communities, vertical customer-defined obfuscation are forced to become real-world. Without development, you will lack systems. We have proven we know that it is better to grow strategically than to enable extensibly. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary iteration and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. STW is the industry leader of best-of-breed process management. We will aggregate the term "revolutionary". Think super-plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without well-planned metrics, niches are forced to become real-time. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Dynamic HTML. Think extensible, integrated. Think resource-constrained, revolutionary. Think compelling, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and AJAX. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without accounting, you will lack convergence. Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for dealing with new technologies?