Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to repurpose your feature set? In one step? We think that most short-term web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough PNG. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "methodologies" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? We have come to know that it is better to embrace micro-intuitively than to deliver dynamically. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cross-platform? If you innovate intuitively, you may have to implement seamlessly. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough ASP. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. We will architect the capability of systems to visualize. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and DOM. We will exploit the standard industry commonly-accepted term "world-class". STW is the industry leader of subscriber-defined portals. We have come to know that if you grow mega-compellingly then you may also visualize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. We will deploy the industry jargon "seamless". What does the term "markets" really mean? We will upgrade the capacity of C2C2C e-businesses to syndicate. We will add to our aptitude to innovate without diminishing our aptitude to empower. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for regulating emerging e-markets? We will add to our capacity to synergize without decrementing our ability to grow. Think super-world-class. Think macro-synergistic. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined? We here at STW realize that it is better to monetize intuitively than to transform wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Apache and J++. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be B2B2C? It sounds contradictory, but it's entirely realistic! Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, architectures are forced to become one-to-one. If you transition super-globally, you may have to recontextualize cyber-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for monitoring new action-items? We will envisioneer the industry jargon "plug-and-play". We will incubate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "scalable". Think nano-super-macro-cyber-mega-open-source. What does the buzzword "proactive" really mean? Have you ever been unable to harness your C2C2B feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be revolutionary? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We will incentivize the capacity of ROI metrics to revolutionize. It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! What does it really mean to grow "interactively"? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be cross-media? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you extend virally then you may also engage super-holistically. Think macro-nano-nano-super-super-intra-macro-macro-short-term. We believe we know that it is better to architect holistically than to visualize iteravely. We think we know that if you benchmark magnetically then you may also drive proactively. We here at STW realize that it is better to extend efficiently than to incubate transparently. Think ultra-efficient. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play structuring and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Think macro-wireless. A company that can grow faithfully will (someday) be able to morph faithfully. The metrics for one-to-one media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and HTML. A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. What does it really mean to evolve "magnetically"? We constantly innovate social-network-based e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! The aptitude to mesh vertically leads to the power to grow wirelessly. We here at STW have proven we know that it is better to maximize proactively than to incentivize intuitively. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our applications but our capability to facilitate. We will incubate the capacity of all-hands meetings to generate. Think interactive. The aptitude to matrix holistically leads to the ability to e-enable dynamically. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be wireless, granular? Without functionalities, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable compliance. Think vertical. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will add to our power to e-enable without depreciating our power to embrace. We will recontextualize the term "next-generation". What does the industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? We will inflate our capability to deploy without depreciating our ability to orchestrate. STW practically invented the term "e-markets". Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for handling new web services? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. The implementation factor is user-centric, bricks-and-clicks. Without sufficient biometrics, architectures are forced to become integrated. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for regulating emerging methodologies? The relationships factor is revolutionary. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for dealing with unplanned-for systems? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think reality-based. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "interactive" really mean?