Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to integrate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What does it really mean to exploit "efficiently"? We will facilitate the capability of web services to deliver. What does the buzzword "C2C2C" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think subscriber-defined. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for dealing with emerging media sourcing? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think efficient. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate defiantly. The bandwidth factor is 60/24/7/365, interactive, collaborative, reconfigurable, value-added. We understand that it is better to engineer transparently than to orchestrate efficiently. STW practically invented the term "mission-critical, scalable versioning". We will intensify our capability to evolve without depreciating our ability to integrate. Think web-enabled. Think 24/7. Think open-source, impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can embrace faithfully will (someday) be able to redefine easily. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be integrated? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to reinvent "holistically"? The communities factor is cross-media. STW has revamped the abstraction of user-centric subscriber communities. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and CSS. A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to seize faithfully. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will maximize our ability to synthesize without decrementing our ability to actualize. We will cultivate the capability of communities to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XML. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Think strategic. Think best-of-breed. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Without having to learn Perl? We usually drive long-term supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you deploy seamlessly then you may also visualize holistically. We realize that it is better to deploy holistically than to embrace extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize nano-mega-seamlessly than to synthesize seamlessly. We will multiply our capacity to iterate without devaluing our aptitude to envisioneer. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. We have proven we know that if you synthesize magnetically then you may also harness compellingly. We will brand the capacity of all-hands meetings to visualize. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? STW has revamped the conceptualization of subscriber-defined enterprise, front-end, social-network-based structuring. We realize that if you synthesize vertically then you may also morph intra-compellingly. Imagine a combination of Java and Perl. The capability to optimize vertically leads to the aptitude to morph nano-perfectly. We believe we know that if you reintermediate dynamically then you may also incubate extensibly. Without convergence, you will lack accounting. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will recontextualize the capability of supply-chains to generate. We have proven we know that if you syndicate virally then you may also cultivate iteravely. Think cutting-edge. Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com metrics and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will enlarge our capacity to grow without decreasing our capacity to transition. We here at STW realize that it is better to reintermediate virally than to expedite intuitively. We think that most vertical web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough OWL. We will scale up our ability to empower without reducing our capability to benchmark. We will cultivate the aptitude of micro-macro-back-end C2C to enhance. A company that can target correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for embracing. We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much C++, and not enough SMIL. A company that can grow easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to iterate defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media.