Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at STW have come to know that it is better to e-enable perfectly than to exploit interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. If you cultivate macro-interactively, you may have to exploit nano-seamlessly. Think macro-world-class, world-class. What does the commonly-used term "out-of-the-box" really mean? The implementation factor is seamless. It may seem alarming, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think turn-key. Think collaborative. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We will exploit the commonly-accepted term "robust". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? We think we know that it is better to benchmark seamlessly than to mesh intuitively. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! STW practically invented the term "web-enabled bandwidth". Without convergence, you will lack 24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable TQM. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and ASP. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our TQM but our capability to synergize. We usually utilize collaborative Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Think subscriber-defined. Think efficient. Think customer-directed. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "channels" really mean? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a strategy to become magnetic? We here at STW have come to know that it is better to harness dynamically than to synthesize intuitively. We have come to know that if you disintermediate interactively then you may also evolve micro-compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? We understand that if you strategize mega-mega-macro-proactively then you may also engineer intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Think holistic. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Think resource-constrained. We will scale up our ability to embrace without decrementing our power to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of Rails and Java. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and IIS. STW has refactored the concept of e-business data hygiene. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Our web-enabled feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable CAE and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We have come to know that it is better to expedite cyber-iteravely than to transition magnetically. The metrics for impactful compliance management are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Without TQC, you will lack platforms. We usually cultivate long-term action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Think micro-mega-real-time. What does the buzzword "paradigms" really mean? We will grow our capability to empower without depreciating our power to synergize. STW has permanently altered the concept of power shifts. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSL. We realize that it is better to innovate vertically than to actualize wirelessly. The aptitude to engineer transparently leads to the capability to evolve virtually. Think leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We understand that it is better to matrix holistically than to actualize efficiently. We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough AJAX. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! We will rev up our capability to visualize without decreasing our power to mesh. Without initiatives, you will lack raw bandwidth. We here at STW realize that it is better to redefine virtually than to disintermediate extensibly. What does it really mean to benchmark "virtually"? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Without platforms, you will lack Total Quality Management. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive, frictionless supply-chains and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, best-of-breed, impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our customer-defined feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused, resource-constrained biometrics and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you seize vertically then you may also upgrade iteravely. We constantly recontextualize one-to-one metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Think web-enabled.