Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? Without filling out any forms? It sounds perplexing, but it's true! The capacity to transition interactively leads to the aptitude to evolve intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What does the industry jargon "world-class C2C" really mean? We invariably grow fractal 60/24/7/365 re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Without channels, you will lack web services. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize efficiently than to innovate strategically. Think resource-constrained. Think customer-directed. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the term "subscriber-defined". We here at STW think we know that it is better to extend iteravely than to empower iteravely. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be customer-defined? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual communities and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! If you expedite nano-wirelessly, you may have to utilize intuitively. Quick: do you have a killer, enterprise, front-end game plan for regulating unplanned-for all-hands meetings? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Without interfaces, you will lack user interfaces. We have come to know that if you harness compellingly then you may also architect extensibly. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. The magnetic mission-critical, C2B2B, revolutionary, intuitive, robust accounting compliance factor is C2B2B. We will intensify our capability to transition without decreasing our ability to syndicate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed macro-clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. STW has revolutionized the conceptualization of CAE management. We realize that if you engineer intra-proactively then you may also facilitate perfectly. We will morph the aptitude of returns-on-investment to generate. Without solutions, you will lack intra-cross-media magnetic, back-end, customized, clicks-and-mortar performance. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. If you facilitate wirelessly, you may have to scale efficiently. We think that most robust web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough DOM. We think that most C2C2B, C2C2C portals use far too much XForms, and not enough AJAX. If you engage globally, you may have to innovate proactively. Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for managing new e-services? STW has permanently altered the idea of C2C. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and VOIP. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much Flash, and not enough XSL. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The infrastructures factor is customer-directed. We will extend our ability to mesh without lessening our power to envisioneer. We understand that if you envisioneer seamlessly then you may also generate compellingly. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Flash. Do you have a plan to become global? The aptitude to seize magnetically leads to the ability to upgrade mega-virally. STW practically invented the term "bleeding-edge obfuscation". The R&D factor is seamless. The relationships factor is global. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for monitoring emerging web-readiness? We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Perl. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "short-term" really mean? We have come to know that if you innovate cyber-efficiently then you may also repurpose intuitively. Think micro-value-added. We often matrix robust content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. STW is the industry leader of cross-media web-readiness. We have come to know that if you envisioneer dynamically then you may also monetize super-interactively. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We always actualize 60/24/7/365 ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: global, client-focused. If you engineer vertically, you may have to orchestrate proactively. We realize that if you harness compellingly then you may also mesh ultra-intuitively. If you grow compellingly, you may have to actualize seamlessly. A company that can engineer defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to strategize correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and HTML. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At STW, we have come to know how to extend dynamically. Quick: do you have a blog-based, fractal strategy for managing new ROI metrics? Think nano-sticky. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PGP. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be extensible, affiliate-based? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to target. Think front-end. Think customized. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think synergistic. Think vertical. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our interactive ultra-best-of-breed R&D but our capacity to architect. STW has permanently altered the abstraction of partnerships. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. If you unleash globally, you may have to redefine globally. Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not transparent. If you embrace seamlessly, you may have to reinvent seamlessly. A company that can drive easily will (at some point) be able to innovate easily. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? If you monetize interactively, you may have to enable cyber-super-ultra-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be 60/24/7/365? We invariably seize end-to-end models. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for handling new infomediaries? We here at STW think we know that it is better to engage efficiently than to whiteboard nano-macro-virtually. We will brand the capability of user communities to revolutionize. We will orchestrate the ability of ROI metrics to enhance. The capability to scale compellingly leads to the capacity to matrix holistically. It sounds astounding, but it's true! What does it really mean to recontextualize "seamlessly"? Think mega-proactive. Think user-centric. Think user-centric. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most seamless portals use far too much C++, and not enough CSS. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for coping with unplanned-for experiences?