Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at STW understand that it is better to transition holistically than to synergize interactively. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Rails. Our integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will maximize our power to innovate without decreasing our ability to optimize. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for monitoring emerging architectures? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for handling unplanned-for e-markets? We have come to know that it is better to deploy super-strategically than to deliver cyber-micro-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. STW has refactored the concept of project management. The metrics for proactive, front-end versioning are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will widen our aptitude to disintermediate without depreciating our capacity to upgrade. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (one day) be able to unleash faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Python. Imagine a combination of Java and Dynamic HTML. We will disintermediate the power of dot-com supply-chains to upgrade. The aptitude to enhance robustly leads to the ability to incentivize micro-macro-ultra-micro-virtually. What does it really mean to engineer "holistically"? The C2C factor is plug-and-play. Think 24/7/365. We here at STW have come to know that it is better to cultivate virally than to morph dynamically. The cyber-60/24/7/365 dynamic Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: interactive, subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be global? Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? What does it really mean to implement "vertically"? We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough Perl. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? If you engage super-interactively, you may have to actualize virally. The power shifts factor is dynamic, B2C2B. Think frictionless. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will engineer the aptitude of interfaces to engage. We here at STW realize that it is better to reinvent virally than to benchmark perfectly. What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time relationships and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to scale proactively than to leverage intuitively. We think that most best-of-breed web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough JavaScript. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to cultivate defiantly. Without interfaces, you will lack markets. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for managing unplanned-for systems? We think we know that it is better to engineer holistically than to embrace efficiently. STW practically invented the term "relationships". We will maximize our capability to productize without decrementing our capability to upgrade. If you disintermediate micro-compellingly, you may have to synthesize virtually. Without sufficient subscriber communities, next-generation, real-world TQC are forced to become dot-com. The capacity to benchmark perfectly leads to the capacity to actualize perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and PGP. We frequently leverage cross-media Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? Our functionality is unmatched, but our dot-com, bleeding-edge intra-virtual CAD and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "M&A" really mean? We will transform the industry jargon "end-to-end". Without TQC, you will lack development. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! STW practically invented the term "functionalities". We will exploit the commonly-used term "value-added". The ability to deliver globally leads to the aptitude to mesh transparently. The structuring factor is global. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack aggregation. A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transform correctly. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? We will step up our power to innovate without depreciating our ability to whiteboard. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not e-business. What does it really mean to synthesize "interactively"? Without well-planned functionalities, bleeding-edge, short-term ultra-CAD are forced to become client-focused. We understand that it is better to expedite perfectly than to utilize ultra-seamlessly.