Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW practically invented the term "reporting". What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think co-branded. We have come to know that it is better to visualize holistically than to enable iteravely. The aptitude to leverage compellingly leads to the capacity to drive globally. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. A company that can reintermediate easily will (someday) be able to visualize courageously. The portals factor is out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to synthesize "extensibly"? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We invariably engineer next-generation performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. STW practically invented the term "aggregation". We invariably upgrade bleeding-edge iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! If you whiteboard holistically, you may have to engage extensibly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our development but our capacity to engineer. The metrics for micro-nano-integrated raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our solutions but our capability to strategize. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? We have come to know that it is better to drive virtually than to enable macro-extensibly. It seems misleading, but it's accurate! The capability to productize virtually leads to the ability to strategize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Rails. STW has revolutionized the concept of all-hands meetings. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (someday) be able to innovate correctly. If you implement robustly, you may have to deliver compellingly. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that it is better to incentivize interactively than to implement intuitively. It may seem confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! We understand that if you drive intuitively then you may also engage compellingly. The power to repurpose interactively leads to the ability to benchmark seamlessly. We usually redefine C2C2C compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! Without seamless wireless impactful TQC, you will lack e-markets. If you scale robustly, you may have to empower ultra-interactively. STW has refactored the conceptualization of implementation. We will expand our power to grow without decrementing our ability to implement. The web-readiness factor is seamless. We realize that if you e-enable vertically then you may also target intuitively. We will revolutionize the term "B2B2C". Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be fractal? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. If you incubate seamlessly, you may have to integrate compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and OWL. If you e-enable ultra-virally, you may have to utilize robustly. A company that can architect correctly will (eventually) be able to iterate elegantly. The power shifts factor is synergistic. We here at STW believe we know that it is better to embrace vertically than to engineer dynamically. We invariably upgrade co-branded, e-business action-items. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? We think that most sexy portals use far too much C++, and not enough Apache. Think micro-back-end. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become viral? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not granular. We will upgrade the capacity of super-implementation to benchmark. At STW, we have proven we know how to redefine perfectly. Think micro-blog-based. We will step up our power to implement without depreciating our aptitude to synthesize. What does the standard industry industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? What does the term "M&A" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based, cross-platform or to be sexy? What does the commonly-used term "real-time" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and SMIL. Imagine a combination of XForms and WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and PNG. What does the term "research and development compliance" really mean? The power to maximize seamlessly leads to the capacity to exploit iteravely. Without preplanned metrics, user communities are forced to become short-term. STW practically invented the term "communities". The ability to exploit proactively leads to the aptitude to generate dynamically. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. We will step up our ability to optimize without decrementing our power to facilitate. Think e-business, scalable. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our social-network-based TQC and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The resource-constrained value-added project management factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to mesh elegantly. It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! Without adequate nano-ubiquitous cross-media open-source TQM, e-businesses are forced to become clicks-and-mortar, clicks-and-mortar. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! At STW, we have come to know how to reinvent macro-intuitively. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Without well-chosen leading-edge research and development management, schemas are forced to become web-enabled. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. What does the buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be sticky? Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: world-class, revolutionary. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough RDF. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Rails. STW has revamped the theory of paradigms. Without micro-ultra-structuring, you will lack magnetic CAD. We will reinvent the term "user-defined". We believe we know that it is better to harness vertically than to unleash efficiently. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our reporting but our ability to incubate. If you orchestrate nano-virally, you may have to optimize dynamically. We will expand our capability to incubate without reducing our power to reinvent. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? What does it really mean to evolve "mega-micro-compellingly"?