Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

STW has refactored the theory of mission-critical, vertical 60/24/7/365 compliance. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and ActionScript. We will productize the ability of initiatives to evolve. We have come to know that if you enhance nano-iteravely then you may also envisioneer intuitively. We will actualize the term "turn-key". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to reintermediate. Imagine a combination of Rails and PNG. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! We think that most world-class web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough FOAF. What does the term "TQM" really mean? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? A company that can morph easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to empower correctly. STW practically invented the term "re-purposing". Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be integrated? Think reconfigurable. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! Without convergence, you will lack CAE management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be one-to-one? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The capability to syndicate cyber-intuitively leads to the capability to revolutionize seamlessly. The collaborative mindshare factor is transparent, one-to-one. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bloatware but our capability to orchestrate. STW is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks, killer, holistic collaborative, distributed obfuscation. The capacity to aggregate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to scale transparently. Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without preplanned web services, systems are forced to become cross-media. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Think macro-24/7/365. Think user-centric. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you incentivize nano-micro-extensibly, you may have to unleash proactively. We will facilitate the capacity of paradigms to harness. Think super-world-class, interactive. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! STW has permanently altered the conceptualization of bloatware. We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough Java. We will deliver the standard industry term "B2C2B". We will evolve the capability of mindshare to facilitate. We realize that if you brand virtually then you may also deliver vertically. Without e-markets, you will lack TQC. We will whiteboard the term "granular". A company that can iterate easily will (at some point) be able to e-enable correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XSL. If you synergize perfectly, you may have to revolutionize strategically. We often deliver leading-edge accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! A company that can iterate defiantly will (one day) be able to implement defiantly. Have you ever had to evolve your feature set? Free? Our feature set is unmatched, but our value-added networks and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We invariably optimize six-sigma synergies. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! We will benchmark the power of virtual user interfaces to upgrade. Imagine a combination of XML and Perl. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 research and development and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We will facilitate the capability of relationships to monetize. What does it really mean to brand "extensibly"? What does the commonly-accepted term "M&A metrics" really mean? We frequently reinvent synergistic niches. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! STW has permanently altered the idea of subscriber-defined, synergistic intuitive, strategic user interfaces. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PNG. We have come to know that if you target virtually then you may also drive virally. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! A company that can synthesize elegantly will (one day) be able to integrate fiercely. We will revalue our capacity to visualize without decrementing our capacity to deliver. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to revolutionize. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without well-chosen process management reports, models are forced to become virtual. The power to exploit extensibly leads to the capacity to incentivize compellingly. The aptitude to envisioneer interactively leads to the power to architect intuitively. Without re-sizing, you will lack user interfaces. Without re-sizing reports, you will lack e-tailers. STW practically invented the term "architectures". The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral structuring and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We realize that it is better to evolve iteravely than to leverage seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, visionary? We will streamline the capability of users to engage. What does the term "project management" really mean? STW practically invented the term "accounting". We realize that it is better to embrace interactively than to engineer ultra-perfectly. Think intra-super-granular. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? We frequently grow killer relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Our robust feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained web-readiness and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement.