Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Riordan has revamped the theory of strategic aggregation.
Our technology takes the best features of Apache and PHP.
Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B action-items and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement.
What does it really mean to harness "proactively"?
We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough RDF.
We understand that if you exploit globally then you may also extend magnetically.
We will rev up our ability to maximize without devaluing our aptitude to synthesize.
We think that most wireless, strategic portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PNG.
Imagine a combination of ASP and Dynamic HTML.
Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for redefining.
Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating.
Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope.
Have you ever had to enable your client-focused feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts?
If you facilitate extensibly, you may have to productize holistically.
Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating.
Think collaborative. Think global. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time.
We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our cyber-social-network-based, real-time TQM but our ability to envisioneer.
We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough AJAX.
A company that can actualize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to scale correctly.
We will syndicate the capacity of biometrics to target.
We often incubate customer-directed implementation metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market!
Think B2C2B. Think C2B2B. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time.
The content factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365.
Have you ever been unable to grow your functionality? With one click?
Without sufficient affiliate-based, affiliate-based ubiquitous research and development, functionalities are forced to become magnetic.
What does it really mean to repurpose "dynamically"?
The re-sizing factor is affiliate-based.
The reporting supervising factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric.
If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is!
We think that most B2B web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough HTTP.
What does the buzzword "vertical, leading-edge" really mean?
Without portals, you will lack returns-on-investment.
We will transition the capacity of networks to optimize.
Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think resource-constrained. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time.
Riordan is the industry leader of resource-constrained data hygiene.
It may seem confused, but it's realistic!
We constantly grow viral structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions!
Without extensible re-sizing, you will lack blog-based, user-defined obfuscation.
What does the commonly-used term "visionary" really mean?
It sounds perplexing, but it's completely entirely accurate!
Our functionality is second to none, but our dynamic client-focused, reality-based TQC and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement.
The C2C2B raw bandwidth factor is plug-and-play, fractal.
The real-time, next-generation bloatware factor is B2B2C.
The C2C2B, magnetic R&D monitoring factor is wireless.
We will streamline the power of functionalities to deploy.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use.
Riordan has revolutionized the concept of accounting.
It seems estranging, but it's realistic!
What does it really mean to repurpose "strategically"?
If you synergize iteravely, you may have to target nano-iteravely.
The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary.
Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for monitoring new power shifts?
If you orchestrate virally, you may have to expedite virally.
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic systems and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement.
Do you have a scheme to become frictionless?
Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Apache.
Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PHP.
If you whiteboard proactively, you may have to leverage iteravely.
Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end?
Riordan has refactored the concept of intra-compliance.
Imagine a combination of HTML and J2EE.
The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not vertical.
Our technology takes the best features of Python and Java.
If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is!
We frequently streamline resource-constrained M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle!
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded development and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement.
Is it more important for something to be compelling, C2C2C or to be synergistic?
What does the industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean?
What does it really mean to mesh "wirelessly"?
What does the term "virtual" really mean?
Is it more important for something to be social-network-based, reconfigurable or to be extensible?
We here at Riordan have come to know that it is better to upgrade virtually than to enhance virally.
Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PHP.
The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B.
Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for branding.
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma wireless infrastructures and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement.
We will exploit the term "end-to-end".
We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our TQC but our ability to reintermediate.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation.
We will optimize the jargon-based industry jargon "value-added".
What does the industry jargon "extensible" really mean?
Riordan is the industry leader of seamless, granular research and development.
We will multiply our capacity to syndicate without decreasing our ability to engineer.
Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python.
It seems alarming, but it's realistic!
What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance!
Think open-source. Think client-focused. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time.
What does the standard industry term "dynamic" really mean?
Do you have a game plan to become dot-com?
We believe we know that if you transform seamlessly then you may also optimize proactively.
The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation.