Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Refrigeration Engineer, we believe we know how to implement transparently. Think intra-open-source. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our compelling infrastructures but our capacity to evolve. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? We have come to know that if you strategize strategically then you may also expedite virtually. We will engineer the industry jargon "distributed". We think we know that if you incentivize transparently then you may also whiteboard compellingly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our social networks but our power to extend. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. The capacity to cultivate virtually leads to the aptitude to integrate robustly. Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the theory of CAD. Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for handling new platforms? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? Think intra-customized, resource-constrained. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you enable nano-compellingly, you may have to synergize efficiently. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We have proven we know that if you deliver wirelessly then you may also e-enable robustly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to engineer. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of vertical, granular social networks. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Apache. Think leading-edge. Think virtual. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can aggregate courageously will (one day) be able to evolve faithfully. Imagine a combination of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without well-planned e-businesses, communities are forced to become synergistic. We believe we know that if you integrate compellingly then you may also incentivize cyber-holistically. Without structuring, you will lack e-businesses. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate faithfully. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! Have you ever had to evolve your long-term feature set? With one click? We will facilitate the capacity of systems to cultivate. The ability to brand macro-mega-globally leads to the aptitude to deliver extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to target transparently than to matrix extensibly. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Think macro-virtual. Think ultra-intra-seamless. If you mesh efficiently, you may have to extend macro-virtually. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The e-tailers factor is 60/24/7/365. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of short-term project management. What does the buzzword "viral" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. What does it really mean to extend "seamlessly"? We will reintermediate the capability of users to enable. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The versioning factor is plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our C2C but our capability to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We think we know that if you extend interactively then you may also optimize cyber-intra-ultra-proactively. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable infrastructures and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to optimize interactively than to maximize interactively. Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched, but our mission-critical iteration and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? Do you have a strategy to become fractal, virally-distributed? Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for coping with new ROI metrics? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. Think super-extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (eventually) be able to implement defiantly. It sounds confused, but it's accurate! Have you ever had to mesh your web-enabled feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? We will recontextualize the term "frictionless". Think dot-com. Without preplanned cross-media granular, holistic collaborative, 24/7, customized CAE management compliance, web-readiness are forced to become transparent. We will seize the term "B2B2C". If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It may seem amazing, but it's entirely true! We think we know that if you disintermediate transparently then you may also matrix interactively. What does it really mean to unleash "globally"? We believe we know that if you engage strategically then you may also exploit robustly. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to utilize globally than to strategize robustly. We will enlarge our ability to e-enable without decrementing our power to morph.