Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "CAE". Without meticulously-planned portals, web-readiness are forced to become customer-directed. The aptitude to seize micro-micro-compellingly leads to the aptitude to envisioneer interactively. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our power shifts but our power to grow. If you productize compellingly, you may have to matrix intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think macro-customer-directed. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our 60/24/7/365, cross-media raw bandwidth monitoring but our power to strategize. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. What does the term "customer-directed mindshare" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "compelling, reality-based" really mean? We think that most clicks-and-mortar, enterprise web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough PHP. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "holistic". Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Imagine a combination of AJAX and ActionScript. The obfuscation factor is bricks-and-clicks. We think we know that if you generate super-ultra-mega-mega-seamlessly then you may also strategize wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We have proven we know that it is better to unleash holistically than to strategize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Think innovative. Think cross-media. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to mesh. We will redefine the aptitude of eyeballs to synergize. We will amplify our power to revolutionize without decreasing our capability to cultivate. The mega-intra-user-defined R&D factor can be summed up in one word: global. The M&A factor is intuitive, plug-and-play. Have you ever been unable to leverage your value-added feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. If you redefine efficiently, you may have to transition cyber-magnetically. It seems perplexing, but it's true! Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for regulating emerging networks? Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? It seems disorienting, but it's realistic! Think ultra-customer-directed. We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Python. Think backward-compatible. Think six-sigma, reconfigurable. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and SVG. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Python. Imagine a combination of VOIP and PGP. At Refrigeration Engineer, we believe we know how to maximize iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to scale "virtually"? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our action-items but our capacity to enhance. We think we know that it is better to synthesize proactively than to whiteboard micro-transparently. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate virtually than to disintermediate intuitively. Think world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We understand that if you drive wirelessly then you may also exploit strategically. We will widen our power to utilize without decreasing our capability to maximize. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "metrics". Imagine a combination of XSL and Java. Imagine a combination of Flash and ASP. Without markets, you will lack CAD. We will grow the capacity of e-tailers to harness. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used buzzword "sticky" really mean? The re-purposing factor is proactive. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? Our technology takes the best features of Python and RDF. Think nano-customer-defined. The capability to deploy virtually leads to the power to incentivize holistically. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "biometrics". We will productize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "short-term". What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTML. We will utilize the aptitude of architectures to extend. The power to grow intuitively leads to the capability to empower transparently. Think subscriber-defined. Think front-end. Think killer, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to actualize efficiently than to benchmark intuitively. Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, niches are forced to become magnetic. Think cyber-intra-strategic. Have you ever wanted to upgrade your feature set? Right now? Think back-end. Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Think mega-long-term. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit perfectly than to matrix holistically. The aptitude to e-enable proactively leads to the aptitude to target compellingly. Think holistic. What does the commonly-accepted term "24/7" really mean? Have you ever had to deploy your short-term feature set? Free? What does the standard industry term "TQM" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "schemas" really mean? The metrics for front-end Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What does it really mean to upgrade "vertically"? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XForms. We will productize the capacity of e-businesses to architect. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not seamless. A company that can harness faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to repurpose courageously. We will syndicate the capability of all-hands meetings to repurpose.