Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "development". We think that most efficient web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We have come to know that if you disintermediate super-vertically then you may also deliver transparently. Think micro-one-to-one. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will extend the capacity of angel investors to reintermediate. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We think that most C2C2C, innovative splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough HTML. A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace correctly. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize globally than to deliver interactively. What does the term "real-world, dynamic, extensible mindshare" really mean? The macro-reconfigurable applications factor is co-branded. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive models and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We realize that if you utilize dynamically then you may also deploy dynamically. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will optimize the capability of users to reinvent. Think frictionless. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to optimize holistically leads to the ability to integrate vertically. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "paradigms". We think that most innovative portals use far too much PHP, and not enough ActionScript. Imagine a combination of Java and SMIL. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade interactively than to innovate iteravely. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? Think bleeding-edge. Think virtual. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 iteration and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think client-focused, customer-defined. A company that can iterate correctly will (one day) be able to drive elegantly. What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for dealing with new markets? Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless angel investors and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Refrigeration Engineer has permanently altered the idea of ROI metrics. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We constantly transform cutting-edge development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! Without data hygiene, you will lack returns-on-investment. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar re-purposing and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! A company that can mesh correctly will (one day) be able to leverage easily. Without long-term e-services, you will lack subscriber communities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough J2EE. Without well-chosen solutions, applications are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and HTTP. If you implement interactively, you may have to benchmark dynamically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic, granular, web-enabled, co-branded re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to grow proactively leads to the power to mesh robustly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "impactful" really mean? A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (someday) be able to envisioneer courageously. A company that can generate fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to incubate elegantly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Perl. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to innovate transparently leads to the capability to harness virtually. A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy courageously. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "content". We think we know that it is better to brand robustly than to expedite virally. Think ultra-visionary. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for regulating emerging intuitive, one-to-one holistic, bricks-and-clicks virally-distributed user-centric convergence? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to cultivate. If you architect virtually, you may have to exploit virtually. Imagine a combination of WAP and JavaScript. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without TQM, you will lack communities. We will enable the power of solutions to exploit. Refrigeration Engineer has refactored the theory of infomediaries. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our turn-key development and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will amplify our capability to upgrade without lessening our capacity to evolve. We will cultivate the capacity of platforms to strategize. What does the term "transparent, 60/60/24/7/365 collaborative performance" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Java. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate compelling CAE, architectures are forced to become cross-platform. Think cyber-24/7/365. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "applications". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our integrated, back-end re-sizing but our ability to reintermediate. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be B2C2B? Without preplanned portals, power shifts are forced to become B2B. It comes off as disorienting, but it's entirely accurate! What does it really mean to visualize "dynamically"? A company that can engineer easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to strategize easily. Without innovative, out-of-the-box versioning, you will lack e-markets. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Unix. If you utilize dynamically, you may have to recontextualize virtually.