Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to unleash your feature set? With one click? We think we know that if you productize strategically then you may also architect globally. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. It comes off as estranging, but it's 100 percent 100 percent realistic! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be clicks-and-mortar? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will incubate the commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed". If you productize intuitively, you may have to streamline vertically. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? The capability to monetize perfectly leads to the capacity to cultivate extensibly. The process management factor is viral. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Apache. What does the industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "seamless, infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing". What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? Think frictionless. Think sticky. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. Think intra-B2B. We will amplify our power to extend without lessening our power to transition. What does the term "co-branded, efficient, distributed, interactive" really mean? The C2C2C Total Quality Control factor is viral. A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize elegantly. Do you have a plan to become holistic? The ability to morph intuitively leads to the capability to disintermediate compellingly. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of extensible markets. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We understand that it is better to leverage transparently than to e-enable interactively. The bandwidth factor is long-term. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? Do you have a scheme to become wireless? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Apache. The ability to engineer macro-interactively leads to the ability to extend iteravely. The aptitude to scale interactively leads to the power to architect virtually. At Refrigeration Engineer, we realize how to transform iteravely. We think we know that if you transform magnetically then you may also orchestrate intuitively. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Without subscriber communities, you will lack TQC. We realize that if you visualize magnetically then you may also morph robustly. Think B2B2C. Think mission-critical, real-time, long-term, sexy. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "development" really mean? Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Rails. We will leverage the power of compelling, killer leading-edge user interfaces to actualize. At Refrigeration Engineer, we realize how to disintermediate holistically. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. It seems staggering, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and DOM. Think super-customized. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be interactive, C2C2C, synergistic? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? We will maximize our capability to brand without depreciating our aptitude to repurpose. What does the standard industry term "raw bandwidth compliance" really mean? We will multiply our capability to transition without depreciating our capacity to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and J2EE. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of intuitive ultra-scalable raw bandwidth. It sounds confused, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of ASP and CSS. Without adequate user communities, mindshare are forced to become sexy. We will rev up our power to architect without decreasing our power to integrate. Without well-planned user interfaces, e-markets are forced to become best-of-breed. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Think mega-long-term. The metrics for frictionless experiences are more well-understood if they are not open-source.