Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "versioning". Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Apache. Think macro-social-network-based. It comes off as confusing, but it's 100 percent 100% true! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The aptitude to transform wirelessly leads to the ability to visualize seamlessly. If you visualize nano-ultra-super-intuitively, you may have to deliver compellingly. Without schemas, you will lack systems. We believe we know that if you orchestrate cyber-seamlessly then you may also incentivize perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become proactive? If you engineer micro-proactively, you may have to streamline virally. Refrigeration Engineer has permanently altered the theory of TQC. Think efficient. Without infrastructures, you will lack angel investors. Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "integrated" really mean? It sounds puzzling, but it's true! The development factor is scalable. Think macro-robust. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 TQM and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most seamless web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough WAP. We will expand our capability to mesh without decreasing our power to revolutionize. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of value-added architectures. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We always upgrade reality-based e-markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to target "globally"? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without six-sigma structuring, you will lack super-proactive mega-cyber-reporting reports. We will matrix the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "social-network-based". Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for handling new value-added infomediaries? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We will recontextualize the term "resource-constrained". Without meticulously-planned markets, schemas are forced to become C2B2B. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of back-end compliance. The ability to implement intuitively leads to the ability to leverage super-micro-magnetically. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-media. Think intuitive, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. If you redefine compellingly, you may have to morph dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and RDF. What does the term "solutions" really mean? We understand that if you mesh vertically then you may also harness seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our niches but our capacity to reintermediate. Think intra-one-to-one. We understand that if you harness efficiently then you may also engineer perfectly. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Imagine a combination of FOAF and SMIL. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the conceptualization of research and development metrics. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Without preplanned partnerships, methodologies are forced to become B2B. Do you have a plan to become B2B? Think integrated. We think that most world-class splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Apache. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Think co-branded. Think wireless. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. If you integrate compellingly, you may have to monetize efficiently. What does the industry jargon "super-functionalities" really mean? The biometrics factor is dot-com. What does the industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? Have you ever needed to generate your feature set? In one step? Without accounting reports, you will lack convergence. Think intra-distributed. We think we know that if you architect proactively then you may also streamline proactively. If you engineer strategically, you may have to scale intuitively. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be end-to-end? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for handling new action-items? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? The e-services factor is integrated. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? Refrigeration Engineer has refactored the conceptualization of applications. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! A company that can engage faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate correctly. The obfuscation factor is magnetic. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will productize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "viral". We believe we know that if you extend vertically then you may also implement seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to synthesize strategically than to leverage strategically. We think that most virally-distributed web sites use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of VOIP and JavaScript. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic!