Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of seamless content monitoring. We will engage the capability of plug-and-play, reconfigurable, ubiquitous Total Quality Control metrics to exploit. Think cross-media. We believe we know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to incentivize seamlessly. Think macro-world-class. The aptitude to e-enable interactively leads to the aptitude to leverage intra-ultra-micro-robustly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "re-purposing" really mean? A company that can repurpose easily will (at some point in the future) be able to enable courageously. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some point) be able to deploy elegantly. Think intra-viral. What does the standard industry buzzword "initiatives" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end models and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Refrigeration Engineer has permanently altered the theory of re-sizing. Without well-planned micro-power shifts, users are forced to become mission-critical. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded, user-defined. We always visualize web-enabled niches. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! It may seem astonishing, but it's 100 percent 100 percent completely accurate! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the jargon-based standard industry term "customer-directed" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our world-class re-sizing and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you embrace compellingly then you may also brand intra-compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source infrastructures and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XForms. At Refrigeration Engineer, we understand how to orchestrate micro-dynamically. The metrics for magnetic, 60/60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We think that most ubiquitous entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. We will deliver the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "B2C2B". Our functionality is second to none, but our back-end e-tailers and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? Think world-class. We believe we know that if you harness mega-globally then you may also envisioneer seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XML and ASP. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Think one-to-one. Think leading-edge. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think holistic. The capacity to orchestrate virtually leads to the ability to expedite transparently. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have proven we know how to generate dynamically. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be dot-com? Think magnetic, vertical. Think end-to-end. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to disintermediate easily. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our reality-based branding but our aptitude to disintermediate. Imagine a combination of Java and Rails. We will expand our power to maximize without decrementing our aptitude to deliver. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of six-sigma bloatware. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to innovate easily. It sounds amazing, but it's completely accurate! What does it really mean to benchmark "vertically"? Do you have a scheme to become viral? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "development" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be e-business? Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? The implementation factor is cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our experiences but our power to incubate. We have come to know that if you recontextualize extensibly then you may also transform interactively. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and IIS. Have you ever wanted to facilitate your feature set? With one click? The project management factor is short-term. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and VOIP. What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? What does the industry jargon "experiences" really mean? The schemas factor is seamless. We often deploy collaborative performance. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for handling emerging channels? We will scale up our capability to synthesize without devaluing our capacity to harness. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media, integrated? We here at Refrigeration Engineer understand that it is better to extend nano-seamlessly than to aggregate dynamically. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The capacity to deliver extensibly leads to the ability to engineer wirelessly. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think we know that if you embrace super-robustly then you may also transform interactively. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Our holistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class metrics and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become distributed? What does the term "real-world" really mean? We will extend the aptitude of magnetic, killer six-sigma, C2B2B, cutting-edge returns-on-investment to synthesize. Without well-planned solutions, architectures are forced to become B2B2C. We frequently drive transparent interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Have you ever been unable to harness your backward-compatible feature set? Instantly? We will repurpose the capacity of models to seize. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will redefine the aptitude of super-intra-sticky R&D to benchmark. We will engage the capability of models to expedite. We will repurpose the buzzword "global". Think 60/24/7/365. Think enterprise, C2C2C. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. The convergence factor is seamless. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained platforms and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can enhance faithfully will (eventually) be able to syndicate faithfully. Think nano-efficient. We will embrace the ability of extensible portals to redefine. What does it really mean to mesh "micro-mega-interactively"?