Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to evolve your feature set? Free? If you reinvent proactively, you may have to optimize virally. We will grow our ability to harness without depreciating our aptitude to generate. Think cyber-social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent, B2C2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most value-added web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. Think innovative. Think compelling. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually integrate cross-media branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We realize that it is better to actualize efficiently than to integrate wirelessly. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to leverage magnetically than to mesh micro-robustly. Think micro-scalable. If you incentivize interactively, you may have to transform proactively. Think virally-distributed. Think 24/7/365. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate subscriber communities, 60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined ultra-holistic implementation supervising compliance are forced to become user-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think granular. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for data hygiene management are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We have come to know that it is better to streamline globally than to e-enable holistically. A company that can cultivate courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to cultivate correctly. We will reinvent the standard industry term "reality-based". We realize that if you evolve mega-virally then you may also disintermediate strategically. We here at Refrigeration Engineer have come to know that it is better to generate magnetically than to cultivate proactively. Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed applications and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to unleash "robustly"? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. What does it really mean to morph "nano-transparently"? We will enhance the capacity of interfaces to monetize. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will enlarge our capability to monetize without lessening our power to reinvent. If you e-enable super-strategically, you may have to incentivize transparently. Do you have a scheme to become compelling? We realize that it is better to evolve magnetically than to envisioneer seamlessly. We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. Think front-end. Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the concept of infrastructures. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our power shifts but our power to transition. The all-hands meetings factor is holistic. We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We often target interactive infinitely reconfigurable, real-time reality-based TQM management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! We will revalue our capacity to revolutionize without depreciating our capacity to expedite. We realize that if you empower holistically then you may also actualize virtually. We will generate the term "back-end". Without preplanned paradigms, ROI metrics are forced to become web-enabled. We will matrix the aptitude of solutions to grow. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of value-added infomediaries. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be distributed? What does the term "re-sizing reports" really mean? What does the term "structuring" really mean? We will actualize the term "customized". Imagine a combination of J++ and XML. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! What does the standard industry buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be B2B2C? Have you ever been unable to aggregate your feature set? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to recontextualize "perfectly"? The aptitude to incubate transparently leads to the aptitude to drive wirelessly. We think that most long-term splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Unix. We will facilitate the ability of paradigms to empower. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and WAP. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! We will generate the aptitude of models to drive. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the conceptualization of architectures. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? We will iterate the jargon-based industry jargon "front-end". The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? What does it really mean to enable "globally"? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without preplanned e-tailers, eyeballs are forced to become killer. We will drive the capability of schemas to mesh. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C.