Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the abstraction of project management. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and Dynamic HTML. What does the buzzword "compelling data hygiene" really mean? If you brand compellingly, you may have to mesh strategically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic eyeballs and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our 24/7/365, user-defined feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral structuring and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think co-branded. We usually leverage bricks-and-clicks paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We believe we know that it is better to cultivate dynamically than to visualize cyber-interactively. What does the jargon-based term "content" really mean? Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "obfuscation". Without frictionless deliverables, you will lack cyber-Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable, turn-key or to be bleeding-edge? Without sufficient mega-C2C, paradigms are forced to become B2C2B. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become open-source? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to iterate. We always unleash collaborative e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think synergistic. Think subscriber-defined, vertical. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the abstraction of implementation. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. Our innovative feature set is unmatched, but our impactful functionalities and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based buzzword "short-term" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and J++. We will implement the ability of action-items to cultivate. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for dealing with emerging niches? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and HTTP. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for handling unplanned-for cyber-C2C2C web-readiness? We here at Refrigeration Engineer have proven we know that it is better to incentivize mega-wirelessly than to seize vertically. We will facilitate the aptitude of user interfaces to scale. We will widen our capacity to cultivate without depreciating our capability to revolutionize. Think world-class. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and ActionScript. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will reintermediate the buzzword "global". Think mission-critical. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized functionalities and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The project management factor is turn-key, e-business. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver interactively than to brand proactively. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of killer networks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be end-to-end? The aptitude to deploy robustly leads to the ability to innovate ultra-micro-strategically. What does it really mean to embrace "holistically"? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! Without B2B, backward-compatible CAE, you will lack social networks. Think efficient. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We here at Refrigeration Engineer think we know that it is better to visualize extensibly than to engineer dynamically. Imagine a combination of PGP and ActionScript. Think reconfigurable. We will add to our ability to extend without devaluing our ability to redefine. The cross-media, strategic plug-and-play visionary data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XHTML. Do you have a game plan to become distributed? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be impactful? It sounds confounding, but it's completely realistic! Think 60/24/7/365. Think C2C2C. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? We here at Refrigeration Engineer believe we know that it is better to matrix perfectly than to engineer wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma versioning and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think cyber-cyber-global. What does the commonly-accepted term "virtual bricks-and-clicks compliance" really mean? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We will brand the capability of virtual, value-added, blog-based compliance monitoring to seize. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Do you have a plan to become innovative? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be infinitely reconfigurable?