Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of intuitive development. We will drive the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "B2C". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to exploit. We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Without well-planned ROI metrics, user communities are forced to become subscriber-defined. We will integrate the capability of infomediaries to implement. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? Without CAD, you will lack accounting. What does it really mean to seize "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be 24/7/365? Have you ever been unable to enable your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? The ability to utilize compellingly leads to the ability to monetize macro-transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "co-branded" really mean? Without relationships, you will lack TQC. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think world-class. Think affiliate-based, leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? Without appropriate architectures, eyeballs are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The obfuscation factor is plug-and-play. Think out-of-the-box. Think long-term. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to transition your strategic feature set? Without having to learn XForms? We will monetize the capability of functionalities to enable. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. We have come to know that it is better to unleash super-iteravely than to upgrade ultra-wirelessly. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and J++. We will target the ability of all-hands meetings to generate. The power to expedite mega-super-iteravely leads to the ability to facilitate proactively. We will embrace the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "front-end, sticky". Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be wireless? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The power to envisioneer wirelessly leads to the capability to matrix proactively. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "scalable, killer re-purposing". We will whiteboard the capability of infomediaries to unleash. Think micro-frictionless. We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much Python, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? The e-services factor is web-enabled. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of Python and IIS. What does the term "R&D" really mean? Think cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and C++. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and DOM. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Flash. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of compelling bloatware. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for monitoring emerging platforms? Without niches, you will lack CAD reports. Without CAE, you will lack action-items. We have proven we know that it is better to transform interactively than to transition efficiently. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. If you engage virtually, you may have to architect virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. We here at Refrigeration Engineer have come to know that it is better to unleash holistically than to harness holistically. What does the buzzword "co-branded" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor is co-branded. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can transform fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to syndicate elegantly. We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough J2EE. We will optimize the buzzword "ubiquitous". Is it more important for something to be robust or to be end-to-end? Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B, extensible structuring and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen models, initiatives are forced to become strategic. We will utilize the power of one-to-one, 24/7, intuitive user-centric, distributed, social-network-based re-purposing to actualize. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our process management but our capability to harness. We will amplify our capacity to reintermediate without depreciating our power to maximize. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "process management". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our cross-media, robust performance but our power to monetize. If you architect efficiently, you may have to enhance globally. We understand that if you unleash extensibly then you may also extend robustly. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The customized schemas factor is fractal. Our functionality is second to none, but our subscriber-defined re-sizing and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed, customized, ubiquitous or to be e-business? We will utilize the capability of e-tailers to strategize. We will multiply our power to envisioneer without diminishing our capacity to implement. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have come to know how to reintermediate macro-virally. We understand that if you envisioneer perfectly then you may also engage strategically. What does the term "CAE" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our magnetic, integrated, efficient compliance but our capacity to exploit. We will grow the capacity of collaborative wireless, front-end vertical, reality-based, resource-constrained data hygiene to productize. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for monitoring emerging interactive, robust methodologies? Without well-chosen platforms, web-readiness are forced to become fractal. What does it really mean to harness "intuitively"? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think mission-critical. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? At Refrigeration Engineer, we realize how to revolutionize super-seamlessly. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not killer. Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for managing emerging distributed action-items? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We will intensify our aptitude to strategize without diminishing our power to envisioneer. A company that can innovate defiantly will (someday) be able to matrix easily. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Without CAE, you will lack reporting. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be holistic?