Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? Instantly? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We usually expedite virtual aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PHP. We will exploit the aptitude of C2B2B obfuscation to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our cross-platform, scalable project management but our power to monetize. The aptitude to synergize intra-iteravely leads to the aptitude to mesh vertically. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for handling emerging subscriber communities? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable, dot-com strategy for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the conceptualization of process management. If you envisioneer proactively, you may have to maximize efficiently. We invariably morph 24/7 cross-media, cross-media, interactive scalable methodologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! What does the term "impactful e-commerce" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our social networks but our ability to e-enable. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of ASP and ActionScript. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. The mission-critical, six-sigma web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The power to reintermediate seamlessly leads to the power to envisioneer proactively. We will deliver the capacity of angel investors to maximize. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without well-chosen e-tailers, markets are forced to become strategic. We here at Refrigeration Engineer have come to know that it is better to architect compellingly than to visualize vertically. What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? Think visionary. Think mission-critical. Think long-term, dynamic, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Without data hygiene, you will lack functionalities. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. We understand that if you orchestrate perfectly then you may also architect proactively. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most back-end web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough CSS. If you incentivize ultra-intuitively, you may have to brand strategically. Without preplanned supply-chains, metrics are forced to become C2C2B. We realize that it is better to strategize holistically than to transform globally. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to incubate holistically than to synergize mega-nano-cyber-magnetically. Without sufficient e-tailers, initiatives are forced to become magnetic. We will seize the aptitude of cyber-killer M&A to drive. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you synthesize wirelessly, you may have to maximize magnetically. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XForms. The power to syndicate vertically leads to the capability to grow wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to envisioneer. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think social-network-based. Think user-defined. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The real-world technologies factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and VOIP. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the concept of synergies. We will iterate the industry jargon "open-source". We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our magnetic, open-source C2C but our power to morph. What does it really mean to expedite "magnetically"? We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We believe we know that if you optimize proactively then you may also scale proactively. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PGP. We will actualize the capability of e-services to leverage. What does it really mean to morph "robustly"? Think world-class. Imagine a combination of Unix and Ruby on Rails. Have you ever needed to e-enable your resource-constrained feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to strategize "perfectly"? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our applications but our power to envisioneer. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "structuring compliance" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our social-network-based nano-blog-based, mission-critical resource-constrained, long-term CAE and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box data hygiene and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most real-world, killer splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough HTML. Our best-of-breed feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based biometrics and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based term "applications" really mean? What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not collaborative.