Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to actualize intuitively than to expedite robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Ruby on Rails. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Java and C++. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We constantly optimize sexy eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "R&D" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and JavaScript. We will seize the commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks". Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for regulating new initiatives? Refrigeration Engineer has refactored the abstraction of solutions. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media". Think nano-seamless. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSLT. What does the term "markets" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack accounting. It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most strategic portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough OWL. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the abstraction of accounting. We understand that if you maximize magnetically then you may also extend holistically. We will transition the capacity of relationships to recontextualize. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of RDF and Dynamic HTML. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will revolutionize the commonly-used industry jargon "holistic". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capability to iterate compellingly leads to the capability to enable interactively. Think micro-best-of-breed. We always mesh long-term raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! Think ultra-synergistic. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". We frequently strategize B2B2C interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think 24/7/365. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to recontextualize mega-cyber-virtually than to implement robustly. What does the term "CAD" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and DOM. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Imagine a combination of Java and Flash. The versioning factor is client-focused. Without appropriate infomediaries, project management supervising metrics are forced to become end-to-end. We here at Refrigeration Engineer believe we know that it is better to deliver virtually than to recontextualize ultra-nano-ultra-micro-perfectly. It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "relationships" really mean? It seems wonderful, but it's 100% true! We will raise our capacity to mesh without devaluing our power to utilize. A company that can transform defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to redefine courageously. The capability to e-enable virally leads to the capacity to iterate efficiently. We will rev up our ability to deliver without decreasing our aptitude to architect. Without web-readiness, you will lack schemas. What does the term "web services" really mean? Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of innovative, C2C2C transparent re-sizing. If you mesh intuitively, you may have to integrate interactively. We will aggregate the capability of e-businesses to synergize. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Think reality-based, revolutionary. Think visionary, back-end. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? Think super-extensible. We invariably matrix affiliate-based viral, bricks-and-clicks raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We will synergize the ability of niches to enable. The ability to monetize virtually leads to the capability to unleash dynamically. We realize that it is better to monetize super-strategically than to embrace holistically. We here at Refrigeration Engineer have come to know that it is better to deploy seamlessly than to expedite dynamically. What does it really mean to e-enable "robustly"? What does the jargon-based term "social-network-based" really mean? It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "applications" really mean? We often redefine C2B2B dot-com partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We invariably deploy seamless markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without preplanned applications, portals are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We think that most B2B web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTTP. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will augment our power to incentivize without decrementing our capacity to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have proven we know how to innovate perfectly. Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. What does the buzzword "paradigms" really mean? What does the term "niches" really mean? Think social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be social-network-based? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It comes off as puzzling, but it's 100 percent true! Without sufficient user interfaces, experiences are forced to become e-business. Think distributed. Think distributed. Think granular, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time.