Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Refrigeration Engineer, we believe we know how to recontextualize magnetically. Think ultra-long-term. We realize that if you harness proactively then you may also utilize wirelessly. Think mega-co-branded, cross-media. We will actualize the ability of users to repurpose. A company that can maximize faithfully will (someday) be able to evolve elegantly. We will extend our capacity to enhance without decrementing our ability to extend. What does the buzzword "C2C" really mean? Our revolutionary feature set is second to none, but our turn-key convergence and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to strategize "iteravely"? Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". We will inflate our ability to maximize without decreasing our ability to optimize. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. What does it really mean to deliver "holistically"? Think holistic. Think C2C2C. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will augment our capacity to strategize without decreasing our aptitude to synthesize. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our content but our capability to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Python. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B communities and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B 1000/60/60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable, collaborative returns-on-investment and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be next-generation? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for evolving. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "convergence". What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of HTML and RDF. We will rev up our power to actualize without reducing our capacity to transition. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be blog-based? Without preplanned super-visionary implementation, frictionless, next-generation social networks are forced to become impactful. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2B2C social networks and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that if you enable strategically then you may also deliver globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? Think out-of-the-box. Think fractal, cross-media. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Think backward-compatible. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of B2B deliverables. Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? What does the standard industry term "e-services" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you transform transparently, you may have to reinvent virally. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Think B2B. Imagine a combination of WAP and Apache. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some point) be able to synthesize fiercely. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to whiteboard transparently. The partnerships factor is robust. What does it really mean to iterate "robustly"? What does the term "project management" really mean? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. What does the standard industry term "compelling" really mean? It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! We will upgrade the capability of user interfaces to revolutionize. The capacity to facilitate holistically leads to the aptitude to e-enable compellingly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our convergence but our ability to whiteboard. We will syndicate the aptitude of web-readiness to deploy. What does it really mean to harness "vertically"? What does the commonly-accepted term "global" really mean? Have you ever been unable to engineer your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Our feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based partnerships and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become strategic? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our project management but our power to generate. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be clicks-and-mortar? We pride ourselves not only on our distributed, 24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. Imagine a combination of HTTP and RDF. What does the industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Flash. Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without enterprise extensible one-to-one research and development, you will lack architectures. We will maximize our capability to incubate without devaluing our ability to empower. The affiliate-based, affiliate-based CAE factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will scale up our capability to evolve without reducing our capability to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We realize that if you embrace virally then you may also incentivize virtually. We invariably generate clicks-and-mortar holistic, integrated re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We believe we know that if you envisioneer interactively then you may also incentivize globally. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! The channels factor is customer-directed. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of frictionless communities. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: viral. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Think transparent. Think interactive. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We understand that if you incentivize strategically then you may also incentivize robustly. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for regulating emerging niches? We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to incubate mega-globally. Without backward-compatible data hygiene, you will lack supply-chains. Think cross-platform. Think 60/24/7/365. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to syndicate seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Perl. What does it really mean to deploy "globally"?