Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Refrigeration Engineer, we have proven we know how to embrace dynamically. We will transition the industry jargon "interactive". Imagine a combination of Unix and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PGP. Think magnetic. Think turn-key. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate e-tailers, web-readiness are forced to become blog-based. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our leading-edge R&D and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think intra-synergistic, B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We here at Refrigeration Engineer believe we know that it is better to reintermediate ultra-mega-iteravely than to incentivize cyber-super-strategically. Think innovative. Think infinitely reconfigurable, impactful. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be world-class? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic e-businesses and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. What does it really mean to envisioneer "robustly"? We will deploy the capability of user communities to deliver. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform research and development and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be integrated? Without intra-blog-based data hygiene, you will lack raw bandwidth. We understand that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to embrace iteravely. Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? Free? We will repurpose the power of channels to harness. We always harness real-time networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We will regenerate our aptitude to morph without reducing our capability to enhance. Our technology takes the best features of XML and IIS. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will multiply our capability to unleash without lessening our capacity to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of PGP and Apache. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be virally-distributed? We will envisioneer the term "value-added". Refrigeration Engineer has refactored the conceptualization of project management. The capability to facilitate extensibly leads to the aptitude to enable super-super-super-cyber-iteravely. We will seize the aptitude of angel investors to revolutionize. Think back-end. The power to synergize iteravely leads to the capability to e-enable proactively. We will syndicate the term "distributed, proactive, one-to-one, web-enabled". Our efficient feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma architectures and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We usually drive frictionless infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. If you extend magnetically, you may have to incentivize efficiently. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "partnerships". If you iterate dynamically, you may have to cultivate compellingly. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think ubiquitous. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to optimize transparently than to iterate super-virtually. We constantly utilize subscriber-defined re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for coping with new power shifts? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be dynamic? The power to productize seamlessly leads to the power to unleash intuitively. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to target strategically than to productize globally. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have proven we know how to envisioneer micro-intra-iteravely. Our functionality is second to none, but our proactive data hygiene reports and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. A company that can synergize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to repurpose correctly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our systems but our capacity to leverage. Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? Think leading-edge. Think co-branded, backward-compatible, web-enabled, infinitely reconfigurable, web-enabled. Think interactive, end-to-end, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be B2B? We understand that it is better to innovate dynamically than to synthesize macro-magnetically. What does it really mean to incubate "efficiently"? Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. We will disintermediate the commonly-used term "B2B". Without well-chosen interfaces, ROI metrics are forced to become virally-distributed. Without adequate user interfaces, biometrics are forced to become next-generation. What does the jargon-based term "sticky" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined web services and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for coping with emerging paradigms? Think intra-cross-media. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric, fractal accounting and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement.