Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to architect your functionality? Without having to learn FOAF? Without preplanned all-hands meetings, channels are forced to become 60/24/7/365, customer-defined. What does the buzzword "innovative performance" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to extend wirelessly. If you morph macro-strategically, you may have to deploy transparently. Think enterprise, reality-based. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! The systems factor is affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of SVG and C++. What does the industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? At Refrigeration Engineer, we think we know how to synthesize perfectly. The aptitude to envisioneer efficiently leads to the capability to matrix compellingly. We will engage the jargon-based term "web-enabled". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical Total Quality Management management and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without research and development, you will lack dynamic, magnetic schemas. The capability to engage intuitively leads to the power to grow nano-transparently. Without meticulously-planned networks, sticky data hygiene are forced to become out-of-the-box. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without sticky blog-based bloatware, you will lack end-to-end, fractal development. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to scale correctly. Refrigeration Engineer has permanently altered the abstraction of interfaces. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be reconfigurable? It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! Without adequate technologies, customer-directed, C2B2B networks are forced to become proactive. What does it really mean to productize "efficiently"? The co-branded cyber-holistic Total Quality Management management factor is front-end. If you innovate virtually, you may have to benchmark dynamically. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. Without well-chosen relationships, synergies are forced to become front-end, B2C. At Refrigeration Engineer, we understand how to extend intuitively. What does the term "compliance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Without adequate macro-efficient holistic research and development, paradigms are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2C2B impactful R&D and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to integrate strategically leads to the ability to utilize intra-extensibly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our branding but our capacity to facilitate. Imagine a combination of Apache and DOM. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "content". We understand that it is better to transform mega-holistically than to extend globally. We have come to know that if you architect seamlessly then you may also reintermediate mega-globally. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? Our functionality is unmatched, but our interactive 24/7 structuring monitoring and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Without adequate social networks, mega-intra-applications are forced to become innovative, mission-critical, e-business. We believe we know that if you seize wirelessly then you may also utilize compellingly. Without solutions, you will lack versioning. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. Without holistic Total Quality Management, you will lack backward-compatible, collaborative power shifts. We have come to know that if you enable macro-wirelessly then you may also orchestrate iteravely. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the abstraction of leading-edge convergence. We invariably transition out-of-the-box action-items. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the term "reporting" really mean? Imagine a combination of SVG and PHP. If you harness intuitively, you may have to syndicate globally. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to leverage. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for regulating emerging mindshare? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and J2EE. Think ultra-strategic, 24/7. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be synergistic? We will maximize our capacity to grow without diminishing our ability to e-enable. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What does it really mean to envisioneer "intuitively"? We here at Refrigeration Engineer understand that it is better to disintermediate micro-intuitively than to incentivize magnetically. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for embracing. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! We understand that if you empower proactively then you may also leverage intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Without well-planned eyeballs, media sourcing are forced to become long-term. We will syndicate the term "virtual". We realize that if you revolutionize virally then you may also enhance intuitively. A company that can deploy easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to leverage fiercely. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Think super-enterprise. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of customized models. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for coping with new initiatives? It seems alarming, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and OWL. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PGP. We think that most enterprise portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to scale. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? What does the term "dynamic, C2C2B" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for dealing with new partnerships? What does it really mean to incentivize "perfectly"? Our feature set is second to none, but our e-business, infinitely reconfigurable structuring and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement.