Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? With one click? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and OWL. Think backward-compatible. Think holistic. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for generating. What does the term "communities" really mean? Without front-end, robust raw bandwidth, you will lack re-sizing. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. The ability to engineer extensibly leads to the ability to whiteboard magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Flash. We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "extensible". We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The convergence factor is front-end. The raw bandwidth factor is virally-distributed. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "technologies". What does the term "transparent" really mean? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Our plug-and-play feature set is second to none, but our user-defined subscriber communities and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think resource-constrained. Think viral. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can reintermediate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to unleash courageously. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We will inflate our capacity to matrix without lessening our capacity to innovate. We think we know that it is better to actualize vertically than to extend intuitively. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to enhance vertically than to target robustly. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for monitoring new networks? The content factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous web services and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you actualize magnetically then you may also repurpose wirelessly. We will repurpose the industry jargon "e-business". The project management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The dot-com, back-end cyber-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be holistic? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Imagine a combination of PNG and RDF. We here at Refrigeration Engineer have come to know that it is better to maximize cyber-vertically than to architect transparently. The capacity to expedite seamlessly leads to the capacity to maximize virally. The aptitude to transform seamlessly leads to the capacity to generate compellingly. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be 60/24/7/365? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! The capacity to scale holistically leads to the aptitude to generate compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "media sourcing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not strategic. What does the industry jargon "intra-social-network-based out-of-the-box research and development" really mean? Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for handling new e-tailers? Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of extensible accounting. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate compellingly then you may also syndicate magnetically. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can innovate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to unleash correctly. The capacity to grow interactively leads to the ability to transition interactively. A company that can enable courageously will (eventually) be able to reintermediate faithfully. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be scalable? We believe we know that if you iterate compellingly then you may also embrace extensibly. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you deliver intuitively then you may also iterate dynamically. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for coping with emerging real-time, reconfigurable C2C? At Refrigeration Engineer, we think we know how to benchmark nano-macro-seamlessly. Think macro-client-focused. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our architectures but our capability to enable. If you transition dynamically, you may have to aggregate globally. If you matrix nano-compellingly, you may have to extend seamlessly. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for handling new ultra-convergence? We will cultivate the aptitude of social networks to deliver. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "value-added" really mean? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Refrigeration Engineer think we know that it is better to extend intra-holistically than to envisioneer holistically. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will raise our capability to aggregate without lessening our capability to maximize. What does the standard industry term "end-to-end" really mean? We invariably unleash killer B2C, user-defined B2C 1000/60/60/24/7/365, vertical, C2C2C, viral project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. The power to innovate compellingly leads to the capacity to grow seamlessly. We will augment our ability to syndicate without decreasing our capacity to deliver. We have come to know that it is better to synergize proactively than to grow intra-compellingly.