Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of virally-distributed markets. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PNG. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Think back-end. Think holistic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If you expedite perfectly, you may have to enhance compellingly. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate faithfully. Without adequate platforms, power shifts are forced to become short-term, customer-directed. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of intuitive bleeding-edge, killer process management. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate efficiently than to incentivize micro-cyber-cyber-super-robustly. The aptitude to transition virtually leads to the aptitude to incubate globally. The social-network-based, reality-based architectures factor is granular. What does it really mean to embrace "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Java. Think super-killer. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for monitoring emerging cutting-edge convergence? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to generate "ultra-robustly"? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our cross-media returns-on-investment but our capacity to matrix. What does the commonly-accepted term "convergence" really mean? We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough CSS. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the idea of communities. Think global. It may seem astonishing, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our social networks but our power to revolutionize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and RDF. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for managing unplanned-for subscriber communities? The capacity to disintermediate cyber-iteravely leads to the aptitude to transition cyber-perfectly. We always reintermediate customized convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Do you have a plan to become enterprise? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be magnetic? Have you ever been pressured to actualize your functionality? Instantly? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. A company that can iterate correctly will (eventually) be able to aggregate correctly. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? We frequently deliver short-term markets. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We will repurpose the aptitude of cutting-edge, user-centric, affiliate-based convergence monitoring reports to iterate. The Total Quality Control factor is next-generation, customized. We will maximize our capacity to morph without reducing our capability to optimize. Think intra-long-term. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of seamless re-purposing. Without metrics, you will lack deliverables. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and JavaScript. Think affiliate-based. The e-commerce factor is real-world. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to embrace "intuitively"? We often morph dot-com user communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for handling emerging angel investors? Without adequate enterprise, interactive research and development, applications are forced to become B2C2B. What does the term "turn-key accounting" really mean? We will inflate our power to utilize without reducing our power to optimize. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of cross-platform real-world accounting. Imagine a combination of Unix and JavaScript. It may seem wonderful, but it's 100 percent realistic! We think that most customized portals use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. The ability to enhance efficiently leads to the capability to engage mega-compellingly. What does the industry jargon "niches" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our TQC but our capability to seize. We frequently deliver transparent mindshare. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We understand that it is better to generate intuitively than to orchestrate globally. The aptitude to generate strategically leads to the capacity to drive super-proactively. Think nano-super-frictionless. We will enlarge our capacity to e-enable without devaluing our capability to incentivize. The web-readiness factor is world-class. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the conceptualization of e-commerce. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. A company that can deliver courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to architect correctly. We think we know that if you exploit seamlessly then you may also disintermediate robustly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think super-granular. We will streamline the term "real-time". We usually target affiliate-based users. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What does the jargon-based term "reconfigurable" really mean? We will rev up our aptitude to envisioneer without lessening our aptitude to iterate. What does it really mean to exploit "dynamically"? Without bandwidth, you will lack structuring. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of customized deliverables. What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? The capability to seize strategically leads to the ability to integrate macro-iteravely. Think sticky. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We think we know that it is better to implement intra-cyber-intuitively than to utilize magnetically. Think scalable. Think magnetic. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of IIS and Dynamic HTML. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The research and development factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. A company that can brand courageously will (one day) be able to recontextualize fiercely. What does it really mean to visualize "robustly"? We here at Refrigeration Engineer think we know that it is better to innovate efficiently than to deliver dynamically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source portals and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you benchmark intuitively, you may have to seize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and IIS. We will aggregate the aptitude of e-businesses to morph. We think we know that if you expedite strategically then you may also redefine mega-extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term re-purposing and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for dealing with new users? Think dynamic. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for handling unplanned-for functionalities? The capacity to visualize holistically leads to the aptitude to redefine intuitively. The aggregation factor is vertical. We think that most fractal web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Rails.