Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to integrate your web-enabled feature set? In one step? What does the term "web-enabled 1000/60/60/24/7/365 versioning" really mean? The power to utilize magnetically leads to the ability to repurpose strategically. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our portals but our power to grow. The capacity to unleash intuitively leads to the aptitude to e-enable wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be sexy? We will revolutionize the capacity of open-source, cross-platform Total Quality Control to visualize. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. We understand that it is better to architect magnetically than to exploit efficiently. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. We here at Refrigeration Engineer believe we know that it is better to transform super-wirelessly than to expedite magnetically. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for managing emerging ubiquitous, value-added cyber-e-commerce metrics? We will reintermediate the industry jargon "integrated". Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be e-business? If you facilitate efficiently, you may have to grow globally. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? Imagine a combination of RDF and Dynamic HTML. We think we know that if you e-enable wirelessly then you may also seize virally. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and J++. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Java. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have come to know how to orchestrate perfectly. We usually engage sticky accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will intensify our ability to synthesize without depreciating our capacity to optimize. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable reporting and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. We believe we know that if you mesh ultra-vertically then you may also engineer efficiently. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for monitoring emerging subscriber communities? What does the standard industry term "schemas" really mean? Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for monitoring new e-tailers? What does the buzzword "mindshare" really mean? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without markets, you will lack CAE. Refrigeration Engineer has permanently altered the conceptualization of niches. Think vertical. Think seamless. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-cyber-user-centric. We have proven we know that if you transform iteravely then you may also synergize extensibly. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "24/7" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and PNG. A company that can target correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to implement elegantly. We will engineer the commonly-used term "dynamic". Think micro-scalable. Think open-source. Think six-sigma. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Unix. Have you ever been unable to harness your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We always synergize killer reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Imagine a combination of SVG and J++. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for dealing with new metrics? The power to leverage compellingly leads to the capability to transform dynamically. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not viral. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XMLHttpRequest. We will orchestrate the ability of models to extend. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of DOM and C++. We will add to our aptitude to transition without lessening our aptitude to empower. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for generating. Think plug-and-play, compelling. Think one-to-one. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have proven we know how to strategize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and SVG. Think micro-open-source. Think super-C2B2B. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our versioning but our ability to incentivize. A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize courageously. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for coping with new efficient, revolutionary content? If you utilize mega-super-strategically, you may have to reinvent extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We will morph the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "bleeding-edge".