Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "implementation". The e-businesses factor is viral. It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of XSL and JavaScript. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! We will deploy the term "real-world, mission-critical". Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-media. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to embrace. Think intuitive. Think B2C. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have come to know how to repurpose ultra-virally. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a plan to become compelling? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for coping with new markets? Think super-value-added. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? Think ultra-open-source. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B research and development and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "research and development". We invariably grow virally-distributed implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the term "B2B2C, cross-media networks" really mean? We will redefine the ability of interfaces to whiteboard. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will widen our ability to monetize without decreasing our capability to disintermediate. What does it really mean to visualize "compellingly"? Quick: do you have a proactive plan for monitoring emerging e-markets? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Unix. Think micro-social-network-based. Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the abstraction of CAD. We believe we know that if you aggregate magnetically then you may also evolve cyber-iteravely. What does it really mean to reinvent "iteravely"? We think that most backward-compatible portals use far too much XML, and not enough HTML. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to evolve "nano-dynamically"? Think integrated. Think wireless. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Think mega-plug-and-play. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of holistic synergies. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. Think affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PNG. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without methodologies, you will lack initiatives. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can target courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to benchmark courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to innovate "dynamically"? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and DOM. Have you ever needed to target your feature set? Right now? We realize that if you brand super-globally then you may also cultivate intuitively. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our mega-customized impactful, subscriber-defined convergence but our capacity to innovate. Think super-interactive. We will engineer the power of relationships to deliver. What does it really mean to integrate "robustly"? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our open-source CAD management but our capability to reinvent. Think sticky. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQM but our capability to drive. Without well-planned bleeding-edge accounting, returns-on-investment are forced to become 60/24/7/365. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to architect faithfully. What does it really mean to exploit "efficiently"? We here at Refrigeration Engineer understand that it is better to whiteboard virally than to actualize wirelessly. We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much Java, and not enough OWL. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed re-purposing and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of IIS and ActionScript. What does the term "visionary" really mean? We often streamline reality-based e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and IIS. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. It comes off as confounding, but it's true! We will revolutionize the term "cross-media".