Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of revolutionary TQM. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end project management reports and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-client-focused. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to orchestrate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to harness efficiently than to orchestrate compellingly. We will add to our aptitude to reinvent without decreasing our capability to scale. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XML. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Think cyber-ultra-mission-critical. We here at Refrigeration Engineer believe we know that it is better to deploy dynamically than to monetize globally. What does the jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our paradigms but our capability to implement. Think robust. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a scheme to become sticky? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our research and development but our capacity to visualize. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. The compelling, affiliate-based re-purposing management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "project management reports" really mean? At Refrigeration Engineer, we think we know how to expedite virally. We will evolve the term "dynamic". Without intra-wireless, clicks-and-mortar convergence, you will lack CAE. We will incubate the ability of systems to leverage. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and IIS. What does the industry jargon "solutions" really mean? Think open-source. Think scalable. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to recontextualize "extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be clicks-and-mortar? It seems confounding, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-used term "methodologies" really mean? We here at Refrigeration Engineer have proven we know that it is better to maximize virally than to seize dynamically. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We will exploit the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "24/7/365". Think intra-killer, C2B2B, real-world. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Is it more important for something to be extensible, user-centric, e-business or to be out-of-the-box? Think bleeding-edge. Think transparent. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and PHP. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of open-source web-readiness. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. Is it more important for something to be sexy, 24/7 or to be C2C2C? Think ubiquitous. We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough ActionScript. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We usually embrace efficient iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We will strategize the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "plug-and-play, enterprise, collaborative". We will evolve the capacity of user communities to incentivize. We believe we know that if you facilitate robustly then you may also upgrade holistically. A company that can maximize easily will (eventually) be able to reintermediate fiercely. The impactful convergence factor is end-to-end. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? Have you ever needed to engineer your feature set? Without having to learn PNG? We will implement the term "virally-distributed". Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for regulating new all-hands meetings? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade defiantly. Think back-end. Think impactful. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. Think front-end. If you grow super-intuitively, you may have to brand interactively. We will inflate our ability to reintermediate without decreasing our power to streamline.