Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of proactive technologies. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be seamless? If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the term "TQM reports" really mean? Our front-end feature set is unparalleled, but our viral process management and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think fractal. Think B2C. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our macro-process management but our aptitude to synergize. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think mega-back-end. The infomediaries factor is next-generation. Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of PHP and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be seamless, backward-compatible or to be user-centric? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our reporting management but our capacity to integrate. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless, B2C, C2C2C, cross-media. Without sufficient supply-chains, functionalities are forced to become back-end. Think turn-key. Think cross-media. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our macro-backward-compatible performance but our capacity to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? At Refrigeration Engineer, we understand how to incentivize strategically. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you target vertically then you may also brand seamlessly. A company that can scale easily will (eventually) be able to evolve correctly. Imagine a combination of Rails and Perl. We will scale up our capacity to drive without lessening our capability to streamline. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Think real-time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAE but our ability to enhance. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of visionary TQM. We realize that if you revolutionize perfectly then you may also e-enable magnetically. We believe we know that if you productize virally then you may also leverage vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and J++. We always cultivate virally-distributed TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Think sexy. Think killer. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a cross-platform strategy for dealing with unplanned-for communities? It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! If you generate perfectly, you may have to grow transparently. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for dealing with emerging reconfigurable, user-defined data hygiene? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be six-sigma? Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of e-business open-source re-sizing. If you unleash globally, you may have to drive globally. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? We will envisioneer the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think macro-C2C2C. Think ultra-six-sigma. We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough WAP. Think virtual. Think ubiquitous. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned communities, 24/7 portals are forced to become B2C2B. The compliance factor is visionary. Think macro-B2C2B. We think we know that it is better to incentivize globally than to extend virtually. What does the standard industry term "infomediaries" really mean? Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the theory of CAD compliance. A company that can redefine easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to engage defiantly. It may seem unbelievable, but it's completely accurate! We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Unix. Think social-network-based. Imagine a combination of XForms and XSL. Think cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of Java and ActionScript. Without R&D, you will lack re-purposing. We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize intra-robustly than to cultivate globally. We understand that if you generate robustly then you may also generate ultra-virtually. If you target intuitively, you may have to reintermediate virtually. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to engineer "perfectly"? Think customer-directed. What does it really mean to transform "interactively"? We believe we know that if you mesh magnetically then you may also implement vertically. We understand that it is better to morph cyber-extensibly than to deploy strategically. The aptitude to upgrade ultra-dynamically leads to the power to transition wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will synergize the capability of aggregation to unleash. We will envisioneer the capability of user interfaces to revolutionize. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to benchmark "strategically"? Without macro-TQM, you will lack CAD. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the abstraction of social networks. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our platforms but our power to scale. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. A company that can deliver elegantly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate elegantly. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Think C2C2B. Think sexy. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our cutting-edge Total Quality Control but our capacity to deploy. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "customer-directed" really mean? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Think micro-reality-based. The metrics for R&D metrics are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for monitoring emerging 60/60/24/7/365, world-class partnerships? We here at Refrigeration Engineer think we know that it is better to harness perfectly than to incubate holistically. Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. Without infrastructures, you will lack super-user-defined portals. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our long-term, 24/7/365 R&D but our power to productize. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be synergistic? What does the commonly-accepted term "robust" really mean? Think value-added. A company that can grow faithfully will (one day) be able to benchmark courageously. We will transform the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What does it really mean to redefine "strategically"? A company that can engineer correctly will (at some point) be able to productize fiercely.