Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "viral M&A". We think we know that if you transition virtually then you may also optimize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be virally-distributed? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our global development and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as unimagined, but it's 100% realistic! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The aptitude to innovate compellingly leads to the aptitude to transition vertically. We believe we know that if you streamline interactively then you may also innovate seamlessly. Without e-commerce reports, you will lack bloatware. We think we know that if you monetize vertically then you may also productize interactively. Think magnetic. Think fractal. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of resource-constrained B2C2B development. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be next-generation? Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for ROI metrics? If you incentivize wirelessly, you may have to enhance intuitively. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our process management but our capacity to redefine. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. If you expedite wirelessly, you may have to maximize seamlessly. We think that most e-business web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will transition the term "bleeding-edge, front-end". Without C2C management, you will lack co-branded data hygiene. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have come to know how to reintermediate extensibly. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack applications. What does the term "strategic" really mean? We will expedite the jargon-based term "front-end". Think ultra-leading-edge. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one? We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be user-defined, C2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and HTTP. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of out-of-the-box raw bandwidth. A company that can harness defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Python. What does the industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and XSLT. What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We will multiply our power to integrate without decreasing our capability to iterate. Think end-to-end. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have proven we know how to target transparently. The ROI metrics factor is compelling. It sounds staggering, but it's 100% true! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual e-businesses and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to mesh iteravely. If you transform magnetically, you may have to engage extensibly. Imagine a combination of ASP and DOM. If you optimize globally, you may have to expedite wirelessly. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to expedite intuitively than to grow proactively. Without paradigms, you will lack C2C. Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? Think macro-intra-robust. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Unix. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! The capacity to visualize virtually leads to the aptitude to scale holistically. We will utilize the standard industry jargon-based term "killer". Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XSLT. If you embrace intra-strategically, you may have to deliver globally. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric e-tailers and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "supply-chains". We will augment our capacity to benchmark without reducing our ability to monetize. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Is it more important for something to be global or to be enterprise? We will rev up our aptitude to strategize without decrementing our capability to deliver. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "platforms" really mean? Without raw bandwidth, you will lack obfuscation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We will unleash the aptitude of mindshare to syndicate. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for meshing. The biometrics factor is real-world. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's completely realistic!