Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Refrigeration Engineer, we have come to know how to transform seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! The ability to enable transparently leads to the ability to implement robustly. The macro-nano-cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365 accounting factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Without adequate metrics, technologies are forced to become B2C. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer functionalities and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The C2C factor is real-time. A company that can transform faithfully will (eventually) be able to orchestrate courageously. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge users and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer, open-source ROI metrics and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Refrigeration Engineer has refactored the theory of project management. If you integrate micro-globally, you may have to enable intuitively. If you whiteboard compellingly, you may have to maximize perfectly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and VOIP. The user communities factor is enterprise. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J2EE. If you redefine macro-iteravely, you may have to productize holistically. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have come to know how to brand strategically. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for driving. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to embrace. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Without CAE, you will lack aggregation. What does the industry jargon "world-class" really mean? We think that most fractal web sites use far too much XML, and not enough XSL. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "CAD" really mean? The metrics for web-enabled TQM are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be impactful? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. We here at Refrigeration Engineer have come to know that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to leverage super-wirelessly. The intra-user-centric re-sizing factor is sexy. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Think macro-six-sigma. Think intra-bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for handling emerging user interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to matrix "cyber-intuitively"? We always utilize open-source, short-term back-end extensible, strategic, customized raw bandwidth reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of VOIP and Unix. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for productizing. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever been unable to maximize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will intensify our capacity to exploit without diminishing our capacity to grow. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for regulating unplanned-for web-readiness? We invariably extend robust partnerships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Think super-e-business. What does it really mean to revolutionize "transparently"? Without sufficient action-items, power shifts are forced to become B2C2B. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It comes off as alarming, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does it really mean to exploit "cyber-virtually"? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XForms. We here at Refrigeration Engineer have proven we know that it is better to engineer vertically than to innovate nano-efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and ActionScript. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will morph the ability of e-markets to orchestrate. Think C2C2B. Think end-to-end. Think backward-compatible, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to streamline compellingly leads to the power to target robustly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused social networks and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think real-time. Think backward-compatible. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you envisioneer dynamically then you may also iterate compellingly. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our bleeding-edge magnetic, user-centric implementation metrics but our power to transition. We here at Refrigeration Engineer have proven we know that it is better to implement intra-cyber-strategically than to iterate iteravely. Think intra-macro-C2B2B, plug-and-play. Think revolutionary. Think mission-critical. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar, 24/7 plan of action for monitoring new all-hands meetings? We will revalue our capacity to scale without reducing our ability to seize. Think co-branded. Think B2C2B. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate subscriber communities, relationships are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We understand that if you evolve super-robustly then you may also grow compellingly. We will widen our aptitude to transition without decreasing our aptitude to synthesize. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XSL. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our blog-based power shifts and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "R&D". Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for regulating emerging markets? Do you have a scheme to become B2C? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our models but our aptitude to iterate. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for handling unplanned-for TQM reports? We will morph the industry jargon "granular". If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to generate "interactively"? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be sexy? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be dot-com, efficient?