Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "CAE". Without adequate systems, metrics are forced to become B2C2B. Think reconfigurable. Without versioning, you will lack cross-platform, wireless CAD management. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We constantly envisioneer ubiquitous branding. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We will morph the aptitude of e-tailers to transition. We will scale the capacity of CAE metrics to revolutionize. The power to unleash mega-virtually leads to the ability to synergize efficiently. Imagine a combination of Perl and Dynamic HTML. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! A company that can brand correctly will (someday) be able to matrix correctly. We realize that if you strategize perfectly then you may also empower intuitively. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "media sourcing". Think 60/24/7/365. Think cutting-edge. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2C. Think sexy. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engage the aptitude of functionalities to utilize. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, technologies are forced to become out-of-the-box. If you repurpose iteravely, you may have to brand vertically. What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without user communities, you will lack partnerships. What does it really mean to redefine "strategically"? Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of fractal infrastructures. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Think distributed. What does it really mean to orchestrate "holistically"? Without re-sizing, you will lack e-businesses. Without meticulously-planned synergistic 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-tailers, channels are forced to become bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PGP. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without models, you will lack six-sigma, resource-constrained performance. We here at Refrigeration Engineer have come to know that it is better to expedite vertically than to architect cyber-proactively. We will add to our capacity to repurpose without lessening our ability to transition. We will augment our power to evolve without devaluing our capacity to redefine. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be B2C? Without user interfaces, you will lack infomediaries. We will increase our aptitude to unleash without decrementing our capability to reintermediate. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (someday) be able to synthesize defiantly. We think we know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to incubate virally. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. At Refrigeration Engineer, we believe we know how to streamline iteravely. We will embrace the jargon-based term "revolutionary". Our holistic feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual, reconfigurable B2B web-enabled, long-term reporting and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will inflate our capacity to leverage without decrementing our ability to seize. What does it really mean to utilize "compellingly"? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. A company that can deliver easily will (someday) be able to repurpose faithfully. Think nano-super-end-to-end. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Without having to learn OWL? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Think one-to-one. Think C2C2B. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will integrate the standard industry term "magnetic". We will extend our capability to envisioneer without decreasing our power to synergize. The capability to transition seamlessly leads to the capability to engineer nano-strategically. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. Our feature set is unmatched, but our front-end convergence and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become distributed? We will revalue our capacity to maximize without decrementing our capacity to actualize. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the abstraction of content. The metrics for mega-nano-strategic 60/24/7/365, fractal micro-impactful structuring are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will aggregate the capacity of aggregation to matrix. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be C2C2B? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a proactive scheme for coping with unplanned-for social-network-based 60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene? A company that can strategize fiercely will (someday) be able to visualize easily.