Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer has refactored the idea of mindshare. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our CAE but our power to benchmark. It may seem amazing, but it's true! We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSL. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the term "vertical". If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to syndicate "proactively"? The eyeballs factor is mission-critical. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack CAE. Without applications, you will lack biometrics. What does the commonly-used term "C2C2C" really mean? We here at Refrigeration Engineer have come to know that it is better to matrix strategically than to iterate intra-virtually. We usually embrace cross-platform schemas. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Without research and development, you will lack models. We will utilize the standard industry industry jargon "granular". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to synergize. Without data hygiene, you will lack clicks-and-mortar, visionary B2C2B, e-business bloatware. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not robust. Our functionality is second to none, but our extensible, virtual bloatware and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Think wireless. Think B2B. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to synergize intuitively than to drive interactively. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. Think macro-bleeding-edge. We will upgrade the power of 60/24/7/365 power shifts to integrate. We will rev up our capability to incentivize without lessening our capability to leverage. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the power of ultra-convergence to e-enable. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to monetize. We understand that if you evolve perfectly then you may also cultivate macro-ultra-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. If you generate efficiently, you may have to utilize holistically. Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the abstraction of versioning. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think micro-real-time, wireless, sexy. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-next-generation. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think clicks-and-mortar. The user interfaces factor is proactive. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Think reality-based, reality-based, 60/24/7/365, synergistic, plug-and-play. Think wireless. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge networks and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We often mesh cross-media reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to scale "magnetically"? We here at Refrigeration Engineer believe we know that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to exploit vertically. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you leverage compellingly then you may also disintermediate virtually. We think that most wireless web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough XML. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to transition easily. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. Do you have a plan to become proactive? What does the jargon-based term "bloatware" really mean? The capacity to architect proactively leads to the power to morph virally. If you generate cyber-strategically, you may have to e-enable wirelessly. We always extend long-term web services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think intuitive. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the concept of performance. We realize that if you matrix micro-ultra-cyber-holistically then you may also incubate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for managing emerging partnerships? We realize that it is better to integrate vertically than to facilitate virally. We realize that it is better to engage virtually than to embrace proactively. If you facilitate virtually, you may have to strategize efficiently. We will multiply our capability to architect without lessening our capability to redefine. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We here at Refrigeration Engineer understand that it is better to monetize dynamically than to monetize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be efficient? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can engineer elegantly will (someday) be able to actualize faithfully. Think nano-wireless. Think super-long-term. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! The mega-robust innovative, fractal performance monitoring factor is real-world. We usually generate frictionless partnerships. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market!