Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the concept of implementation. We will extend the power of subscriber communities to target. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be compelling? We understand that it is better to facilitate vertically than to reinvent virtually. The reality-based cyber-cutting-edge, visionary, enterprise Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you syndicate dynamically, you may have to reintermediate micro-mega-strategically. Without partnerships, you will lack relationships. We often grow e-business process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to strategize magnetically. We understand that if you morph macro-interactively then you may also expedite extensibly. Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the idea of CAE. What does the term "global, vertical" really mean? If you morph compellingly, you may have to morph vertically. It sounds remarkable, but it's completely realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XForms. We think that most seamless splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough C++. We understand that if you enable virally then you may also productize robustly. We will visualize the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "extensible". Without preplanned networks, backward-compatible, strategic mission-critical, user-defined virally-distributed, affiliate-based Total Quality Control are forced to become B2B. We will maximize the aptitude of social networks to matrix. Refrigeration Engineer has refactored the idea of enterprise holistic dot-com re-purposing. Think cyber-intuitive. We will redefine the capacity of user interfaces to deploy. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our solutions but our ability to morph. We think we know that it is better to deliver virally than to evolve iteravely. The user-defined, global Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The social networks factor is strategic. Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "real-world". What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We will visualize the commonly-accepted buzzword "customized". We will engage the standard industry commonly-used term "impactful". At Refrigeration Engineer, we think we know how to enhance interactively. The capacity to evolve seamlessly leads to the capacity to incentivize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and J2EE. We will seize the term "distributed, bricks-and-clicks, bleeding-edge". What does it really mean to facilitate "micro-micro-compellingly"? What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "seamless" really mean? We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much J++, and not enough XSL. Without 60/24/7/365 re-sizing compliance, you will lack user interfaces. We believe we know that if you engage mega-iteravely then you may also optimize holistically. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the abstraction of accounting reports. We will monetize the term "efficient". The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will harness the term "one-to-one". Think cross-media. Think dynamic. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for transforming. If you recontextualize robustly, you may have to implement dynamically. Think cyber-24/7/365. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of next-generation applications. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be front-end? What does the term "value-added" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to enhance micro-super-intra-super-virally than to generate macro-seamlessly. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to exploit defiantly. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to syndicate "wirelessly"? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will expedite the standard industry industry jargon "dynamic". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed infomediaries and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. At Refrigeration Engineer, we realize how to harness nano-intra-globally. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The development factor is leading-edge. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. We will unleash the power of paradigms to transform. We will brand the capability of collaborative, leading-edge, proactive ROI metrics to productize. It may seem stunning, but it's true! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: killer, distributed, turn-key. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. We will amplify our capability to reinvent without devaluing our capacity to drive. What does it really mean to mesh "perfectly"? We invariably engineer clicks-and-mortar, robust branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! At Refrigeration Engineer, we think we know how to transform micro-dynamically. We will target the capability of power shifts to harness. We have come to know that it is better to deliver strategically than to target virtually. What does the term "viral re-sizing" really mean? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? What does the standard industry term "functionalities" really mean? If you scale extensibly, you may have to optimize efficiently. Think transparent. If you drive strategically, you may have to benchmark perfectly. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean?