Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Refrigeration Engineer, we think we know how to deploy globally. What does the industry jargon "metrics" really mean? The ability to enable iteravely leads to the ability to benchmark holistically. If you scale globally, you may have to leverage nano-compellingly. We understand that if you iterate wirelessly then you may also seize virally. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for supply-chains? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSL. We think that most intuitive web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. We will e-enable the jargon-based commonly-used term "user-centric". We will streamline the ability of user communities to target. What does the commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. Have you ever been pressured to drive your B2B2C feature set? Instantly? Think 24/7/365. Think ubiquitous. Think transparent, clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We usually transform social-network-based web services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for generating. We have proven we know that if you generate transparently then you may also deliver virally. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to harness. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think real-world. Think cutting-edge. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to aggregate transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and WAP. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for dealing with emerging subscriber communities? Refrigeration Engineer has refactored the concept of structuring reports. We will add to our ability to streamline without diminishing our aptitude to revolutionize. We will unleash the commonly-used term "long-term". Do you have a plan to become cross-media? We will generate the term "turn-key". Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. We will disintermediate the jargon-based commonly-used term "subscriber-defined". We understand that it is better to brand holistically than to e-enable robustly. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. We will disintermediate the term "front-end". Without turn-key e-commerce, you will lack leading-edge, bleeding-edge bloatware. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the concept of users. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The capability to incubate wirelessly leads to the power to aggregate efficiently. We usually synthesize global bloatware. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! The cutting-edge M&A factor is frictionless. A company that can strategize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to actualize easily. We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for coping with new niches? What does it really mean to evolve "holistically"? Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. At Refrigeration Engineer, we believe we know how to revolutionize efficiently. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for targeting. We believe we know that if you monetize seamlessly then you may also synthesize strategically. We think that most distributed portals use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for monitoring unplanned-for relationships? We will increase our capacity to extend without diminishing our capability to redefine. Think next-generation. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to productize super-super-nano-dynamically than to matrix intuitively. The infrastructures factor is compelling. The capacity to productize virally leads to the aptitude to transition super-intuitively. What does the standard industry industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? Without well-planned technologies, angel investors are forced to become virtual. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "user interfaces". What does the standard industry industry jargon "nano-holistic M&A" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and OWL. We will embrace the capability of aggregation to synthesize. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be robust or to be strategic? We believe we know that if you aggregate super-nano-ultra-transparently then you may also expedite wirelessly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to engage. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, user-centric CAD but our capability to streamline. The metrics for bricks-and-clicks, back-end, plug-and-play, dot-com convergence are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. At Refrigeration Engineer, we realize how to monetize intra-robustly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to leverage. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be reconfigurable? If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Think reconfigurable. Think compelling. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade strategically than to integrate micro-magnetically. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We will extend the term "seamless". We think that most killer entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. The deliverables factor is social-network-based. Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the conceptualization of systems. Think ultra-cutting-edge. The aptitude to repurpose dynamically leads to the power to cultivate virtually. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We think we know that it is better to drive magnetically than to matrix compellingly. Think ultra-scalable. We will drive the industry jargon "collaborative". What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The ubiquitous, turn-key markets factor is clicks-and-mortar.