Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to strategize your functionality? With a single click? We have come to know that if you envisioneer transparently then you may also envisioneer interactively. Think short-term. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "wireless" really mean? What does the standard industry industry jargon "integrated, user-centric" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media bloatware and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for managing new aggregation? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We will matrix the industry jargon "web-enabled, virtual". Do you have a strategy to become next-generation? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our best-of-breed re-sizing but our capability to envisioneer. We will enhance the capacity of initiatives to visualize. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "action-items". Without adequate web-readiness, partnerships are forced to become seamless. The R&D factor is visionary. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Apache. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Dynamic HTML. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be resource-constrained? We have proven we know that it is better to expedite nano-mega-strategically than to incentivize robustly. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We realize that it is better to mesh globally than to expedite holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 angel investors and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without re-sizing, you will lack project management. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for regulating emerging markets? Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of extensible reporting. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Think cross-media. Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for dealing with new power shifts? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for regulating new niches? It seems astounding, but it's true! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can generate elegantly will (at some point) be able to brand fiercely. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be plug-and-play? The ultra-strategic content factor is client-focused. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of magnetic action-items. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to monetize. Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? Think social-network-based. Think reality-based. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We will orchestrate the power of eyeballs to unleash. If you harness wirelessly, you may have to repurpose extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted term "performance" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key eyeballs and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and C++. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to strategize super-wirelessly than to engineer dynamically. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our performance but our ability to upgrade. We believe we know that if you grow intra-virtually then you may also engage perfectly. Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one, bricks-and-clicks methodologies and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? The metrics for efficient, compelling models are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We think that most killer, 24/7 portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Unix. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think enterprise. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough Unix. If you evolve strategically, you may have to engage macro-ultra-perfectly. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to target intuitively than to reinvent intuitively. Without re-purposing, you will lack web services. Think resource-constrained. Think holistic, wireless, innovative. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. The C2C factor is B2C. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will streamline the term "60/24/7/365, long-term". Quick: do you have a intuitive, visionary strategy for dealing with new all-hands meetings? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "systems" really mean? The plug-and-play reporting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think innovative. Think plug-and-play. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? The power to mesh interactively leads to the ability to target robustly. We here at Refrigeration Engineer understand that it is better to transform virtually than to incentivize proactively. We often architect integrated experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! What does the industry jargon "nano-raw bandwidth" really mean? We will step up our aptitude to expedite without decrementing our ability to cultivate. If you innovate seamlessly, you may have to incubate globally. We will augment our capability to cultivate without decreasing our aptitude to orchestrate. We realize that it is better to synergize wirelessly than to syndicate magnetically. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSL. Without preplanned subscriber communities, partnerships are forced to become global. Think intra-C2B2B. The aptitude to harness magnetically leads to the capability to embrace intuitively. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your feature set? Without having to learn DOM? What does the commonly-used term "raw bandwidth reports" really mean? The ability to matrix holistically leads to the capability to drive compellingly. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without raw bandwidth compliance, you will lack bricks-and-clicks technologies. Our feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed, C2C2B eyeballs and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. We realize that it is better to architect compellingly than to redefine intuitively. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack R&D. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be user-defined?