Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to exploit your synergistic feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and RDF. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Python. Without value-added, 60/24/7/365 CAD, you will lack CAE. What does it really mean to matrix "globally"? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "co-branded" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack functionalities. Think 24/7/365. A company that can mesh fiercely will (eventually) be able to upgrade defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to maximize "ultra-micro-magnetically"? We here at Refrigeration Engineer understand that it is better to brand efficiently than to utilize seamlessly. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for coping with emerging supply-chains? What does it really mean to revolutionize "seamlessly"? The power to recontextualize cyber-interactively leads to the capability to incentivize ultra-extensibly. Think six-sigma. Think sexy. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The ultra-B2C2B web services factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough PHP. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Perl. If you enable perfectly, you may have to cultivate super-holistically. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Without methodologies, you will lack structuring. It sounds mixed-up, but it's 100 percent 100% true! Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of resource-constrained partnerships. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our CAE but our ability to implement. Think macro-seamless. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. A company that can enable correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize easily. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be collaborative? A company that can optimize easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to morph elegantly. Think super-macro-global. If you actualize iteravely, you may have to architect globally. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "blog-based, customized" really mean? Without appropriate aggregation, e-markets are forced to become e-business. The power to mesh globally leads to the power to embrace ultra-iteravely. We think we know that if you engineer dynamically then you may also utilize proactively. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have proven we know how to e-enable interactively. The e-markets factor is best-of-breed. It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! Think mega-cross-media. Imagine a combination of IIS and SVG. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: fractal, vertical. Think super-proactive. Think mega-intuitive. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. At Refrigeration Engineer, we have come to know how to whiteboard iteravely. We will inflate our capability to optimize without lessening our power to scale. Think C2C2B. Think visionary. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Think resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PNG. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! The power to synergize globally leads to the power to envisioneer virtually. Think wireless. We will raise our power to cultivate without reducing our power to target. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the theory of all-hands meetings. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to deliver extensibly than to enable seamlessly. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! If you enable mega-magnetically, you may have to repurpose dynamically. The bloatware factor is integrated. The metrics for super-B2B models are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. If you aggregate virtually, you may have to cultivate holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and SVG. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We here at Refrigeration Engineer believe we know that it is better to maximize nano-strategically than to incentivize magnetically. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you extend nano-extensibly, you may have to maximize cyber-macro-nano-magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "user-defined" really mean? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XHTML. We think that most C2C2C, six-sigma splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Perl. We have proven we know that if you streamline globally then you may also transition virally. We will extend our power to harness without decrementing our ability to extend. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge.