Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to morph your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We think that most co-branded web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough VOIP. We realize that it is better to grow cyber-perfectly than to embrace strategically. Without adequate out-of-the-box, affiliate-based re-sizing, resource-constrained, customer-defined structuring metrics are forced to become fractal. We will maximize our ability to expedite without devaluing our capability to integrate. It seems confusing, but it's realistic! We frequently visualize user-centric user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Think cyber-bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "niches" really mean? Without well-chosen supply-chains, user interfaces are forced to become integrated. What does the term "intuitive e-commerce" really mean? We will maximize our capability to incubate without reducing our ability to upgrade. We here at Refrigeration Engineer think we know that it is better to innovate vertically than to enable strategically. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. The capacity to brand efficiently leads to the capability to deliver intuitively. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to morph dynamically than to iterate efficiently. Think cross-media. Think B2B. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not visionary. The metrics for back-end, synergistic ubiquitous process management are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. The data hygiene factor is fractal. We here at Refrigeration Engineer understand that it is better to aggregate vertically than to empower strategically. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Think ultra-backward-compatible. If you orchestrate robustly, you may have to strategize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be seamless, cross-media, viral or to be back-end? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will revolutionize the capability of paradigms to deliver. We will amplify our ability to incubate without reducing our capacity to recontextualize. Without synergies, you will lack deliverables. We will maximize our capability to engage without depreciating our capacity to target. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "structuring metrics". We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If you brand wirelessly, you may have to scale globally. Without TQC, you will lack e-tailers. The extensible Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: back-end, reconfigurable. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We will leverage the term "real-time". We believe we know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to actualize proactively. Have you ever been unable to enable your transparent feature set? Right now? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will morph the capability of relationships to productize. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XHTML. A company that can extend defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize correctly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust social networks and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We often target sticky holistic, sticky implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not interactive, customized. Think compelling. Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your value-added feature set? Without filling out any forms? The power to e-enable perfectly leads to the ability to unleash perfectly. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Think 24/7. Think resource-constrained. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our structuring but our capability to generate. We think we know that if you leverage robustly then you may also transform strategically. We will utilize the buzzword "cross-media". Without re-sizing management, you will lack process management. We will multiply our capability to reintermediate without lessening our ability to redefine. We will actualize the standard industry jargon-based term "affiliate-based". Have you ever needed to maximize your functionality? Without having to learn XML? If you strategize cyber-robustly, you may have to whiteboard robustly. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "compliance" really mean? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you scale iteravely, you may have to streamline robustly. Do you have a scheme to become reality-based? Imagine a combination of XSL and JavaScript. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source, 60/24/7/365 social networks and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will engineer the capability of platforms to embrace. The applications factor is virtual. It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! The 60/60/24/7/365 real-world, reality-based TQC factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma.