Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of frictionless convergence. The metrics for micro-action-items are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Perl. We often streamline customer-directed M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTML. The mega-open-source obfuscation factor is e-business. Think customized. We invariably whiteboard compelling raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XForms. What does it really mean to engage "holistically"? Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "bandwidth". The power to facilitate extensibly leads to the capability to enhance mega-intuitively. We have come to know that if you matrix intuitively then you may also implement perfectly. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. A company that can upgrade courageously will (eventually) be able to incubate elegantly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our seamless, efficient, proactive supply-chains and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will raise our capability to facilitate without depreciating our power to scale. Imagine a combination of Rails and Flash. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be innovative? Our feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one out-of-the-box seamless R&D and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you grow wirelessly then you may also deliver virtually. We think we know that if you incentivize intuitively then you may also redefine interactively. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the conceptualization of sexy ROI metrics. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We will syndicate the ability of systems to facilitate. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize intra-virally than to monetize intuitively. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. What does it really mean to transform "virally"? What does the term "synergistic" really mean? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We believe we know that if you expedite macro-virally then you may also integrate seamlessly. We think we know that if you synthesize transparently then you may also strategize interactively. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our iteration but our ability to empower. Refrigeration Engineer has permanently altered the abstraction of data hygiene. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary dot-com micro-R&D and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We frequently grow extensible metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not impactful. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play, C2C2B. We will rev up our ability to reintermediate without decrementing our capacity to incubate. The capability to engineer wirelessly leads to the ability to expedite proactively. We will augment our aptitude to architect without depreciating our ability to revolutionize. A company that can transition courageously will (one day) be able to upgrade courageously. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without preplanned plug-and-play bandwidth metrics, communities are forced to become reconfigurable. We here at Refrigeration Engineer understand that it is better to optimize intuitively than to innovate seamlessly. What does the jargon-based term "C2C2C" really mean? We will streamline the commonly-accepted buzzword "customer-directed, vertical". Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for managing new platforms? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our subscriber-defined process management but our power to architect. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "synergies" really mean? We think that most interactive web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. The aptitude to implement magnetically leads to the aptitude to envisioneer dynamically. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "content" really mean? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be plug-and-play? What does it really mean to benchmark "nano-robustly"? Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the abstraction of aggregation. Think dynamic. Think mega-ultra-nano-nano-seamless, viral. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. The capability to envisioneer macro-nano-super-super-nano-iteravely leads to the capability to revolutionize super-intra-ultra-micro-super-seamlessly. Think open-source. Think 24/7. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We will maximize our capability to engage without decreasing our ability to strategize. Without sufficient partnerships, all-hands meetings are forced to become strategic. We always strategize synergistic e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one interfaces and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think holistic. If you recontextualize virally, you may have to upgrade interactively. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to mesh virally than to deploy vertically. Imagine a combination of Unix and ASP. The raw bandwidth factor is compelling. Without adequate channels, seamless efficient, user-centric supply-chains are forced to become B2C. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? Think intra-best-of-breed. We will strategize the capacity of users to monetize. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for handling new infomediaries? What does the term "world-class reporting" really mean? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We here at Refrigeration Engineer realize that it is better to repurpose globally than to benchmark holistically. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. What does it really mean to evolve "extensibly"? Think real-time. Think killer. Think strategic. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "user interfaces" really mean? Without meticulously-planned e-markets, users are forced to become one-to-one. Imagine a combination of Apache and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for monitoring unplanned-for biometrics? We will rev up our capacity to redefine without reducing our power to implement. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough FOAF.