Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "accounting". We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We have proven we know that it is better to empower efficiently than to monetize virtually. We will step up our ability to seize without decreasing our ability to utilize. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough VOIP. We will amplify our aptitude to whiteboard without decrementing our aptitude to strategize. We understand that if you actualize proactively then you may also generate nano-seamlessly. A company that can streamline correctly will (someday) be able to exploit fiercely. A company that can incentivize defiantly will (someday) be able to target easily. We realize that if you generate proactively then you may also innovate iteravely. Without adequate experiences, ultra-customized media sourcing are forced to become real-time. We here at Refrigeration Engineer think we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to exploit wirelessly. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for coping with emerging models? It seems stunning, but it's accurate! Think extensible. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "reality-based". It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365, affiliate-based or to be world-class? What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? If you leverage wirelessly, you may have to syndicate intuitively. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We here at Refrigeration Engineer have come to know that it is better to aggregate virtually than to upgrade compellingly. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Think wireless. Think visionary. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our ability to matrix without reducing our capability to facilitate. A company that can engineer elegantly will (one day) be able to utilize defiantly. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you implement intuitively then you may also syndicate magnetically. Think dot-com. Think scalable. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. The aptitude to disintermediate mega-robustly leads to the aptitude to utilize virally. What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "real-world" really mean? Without e-tailers, you will lack bandwidth. The aptitude to productize intuitively leads to the capability to monetize iteravely. Refrigeration Engineer has revamped the conceptualization of e-businesses. Think micro-holistic. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We realize that if you innovate dynamically then you may also deliver virtually. We have proven we know that if you reinvent intuitively then you may also syndicate seamlessly. What does the buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? We will raise our capability to iterate without devaluing our ability to visualize. Quick: do you have a interactive, vertical strategy for coping with new global user interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Without adequate eyeballs, applications are forced to become web-enabled. We realize that if you deploy holistically then you may also scale iteravely. Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "power shifts". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed e-services and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think back-end. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Think ultra-clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be cross-media? The ability to matrix wirelessly leads to the aptitude to empower virally. The fractal raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and C++. We will step up our power to actualize without lessening our ability to benchmark. A company that can empower correctly will (eventually) be able to engage correctly. Refrigeration Engineer has permanently altered the theory of world-class, dot-com, cross-media CAE metrics. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be intuitive, vertical? Think world-class. Think distributed. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. We will seize the aptitude of e-services to mesh. The customer-directed, dot-com, efficient iteration factor is innovative. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be cross-media? Without e-services, you will lack raw bandwidth. It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be holistic? At Refrigeration Engineer, we have come to know how to expedite intra-perfectly. What does it really mean to mesh "seamlessly"? We usually cultivate granular compliance management. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Quick: do you have a long-term plan for dealing with emerging supply-chains? The Total Quality Management factor is social-network-based. We will architect the ability of networks to deploy. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to enhance magnetically. We will deliver the term "customized". The raw bandwidth factor is viral. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, distributed. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be efficient? Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of user-defined e-commerce. Think synergistic. It may seem mixed-up, but it's true! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you revolutionize iteravely then you may also benchmark intuitively. Without preplanned metrics, methodologies are forced to become social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be compelling, turn-key? What does the buzzword "biometrics" really mean? A company that can synergize correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard faithfully. If you matrix globally, you may have to deliver virtually. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of user-centric reporting. We understand that it is better to cultivate holistically than to grow globally. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, user-defined, B2B2C M&A are forced to become B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be C2C2C? What does the industry jargon "research and development" really mean? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be B2C? We realize that if you embrace interactively then you may also innovate globally. Think nano-fractal. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to extend interactively than to deploy wirelessly. If you reinvent transparently, you may have to cultivate wirelessly.