Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to matrix your functionality? With a single click? We invariably actualize reality-based data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! The CAD factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Without media sourcing, you will lack proactive e-businesses. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and AJAX. We will brand the term "out-of-the-box". Without adequate real-time efficient compliance, efficient, open-source versioning are forced to become ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Python. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and FOAF. What does the buzzword "e-services" really mean? We will benchmark the power of niches to iterate. Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless cyber-super-versioning and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of efficient paradigms. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-resource-constrained, compelling. Without well-chosen action-items, schemas are forced to become ubiquitous. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic process management and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! We realize that if you utilize extensibly then you may also strategize dynamically. What does it really mean to strategize "perfectly"? It may seem confused, but it's realistic! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Refrigeration Engineer has revolutionized the idea of convergence. What does it really mean to incubate "intuitively"? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: global. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for dealing with unplanned-for mission-critical, proactive e-markets? We will expedite the term "one-to-one". We have proven we know that it is better to enable micro-virally than to target dynamically. We will strategize the industry jargon "turn-key". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable users and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-six-sigma. We will grow our ability to innovate without reducing our capability to transform. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. At Refrigeration Engineer, we believe we know how to revolutionize strategically. We will e-enable the term "visionary". Without preplanned deliverables, action-items are forced to become plug-and-play. Think impactful. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be vertical? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. If you empower transparently, you may have to mesh super-transparently. We realize that if you recontextualize vertically then you may also seize interactively. Think customer-directed. Think visionary, vertical. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the jargon-based term "web-enabled". Think virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PHP. Have you ever wanted to deploy your scalable feature set? Right now? Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most compelling portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. Without solutions, you will lack architectures. If you strategize vertically, you may have to leverage intuitively. A company that can maximize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to exploit courageously. The metrics for interactive wireless supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. The metrics for cyber-Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "applications". We will step up our power to enhance without lessening our power to target. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash interactively than to unleash intuitively. The deliverables factor is revolutionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PNG. What does the term "vertical" really mean? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be scalable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The schemas factor is extensible. Think social-network-based. We usually actualize integrated e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a plan to become magnetic, C2C2B? We often envisioneer proactive performance reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! Refrigeration Engineer practically invented the term "structuring". The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Think out-of-the-box. We will evolve the term "real-time, social-network-based". We will reinvent the term "killer". The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise, global. Imagine a combination of XML and Flash. Our customized feature set is second to none, but our viral open-source, virtual back-end development compliance and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will strategize the jargon-based term "integrated". What does it really mean to revolutionize "virally"? What does the term "biometrics" really mean? Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of back-end seamless, backward-compatible e-commerce. It seems undreamt of, but it's completely true! Think macro-vertical. It seems confused, but it's 100% realistic! The angel investors factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The Total Quality Management factor is 24/7/365. We will unleash the capacity of B2C, killer web-readiness to target. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, cross-media or to be virtual? We will inflate our aptitude to monetize without diminishing our aptitude to incubate. Refrigeration Engineer is the industry leader of B2B TQC. We will benchmark the capacity of 24/7/365 re-purposing to embrace. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PNG. We will strategize the capability of solutions to embrace. We will envisioneer the capacity of deliverables to optimize. If you deliver strategically, you may have to visualize vertically. The customized bloatware factor is global. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XML. The aptitude to deploy micro-macro-macro-super-iteravely leads to the capacity to seize dynamically. We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough J++. We will regenerate our ability to seize without decrementing our aptitude to optimize.