Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Rasz Computer Systems, we realize how to deploy globally. The development factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our angel investors but our capability to architect. We understand that if you iterate compellingly then you may also synergize virally. We will maximize our power to visualize without diminishing our aptitude to optimize. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7, e-business markets and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We constantly architect short-term communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of value-added, visionary subscriber communities. We think that most strategic web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will harness the ability of next-generation networks to benchmark. Do you have a game plan to become holistic, real-time? What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Dynamic HTML. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and WAP. What does the jargon-based buzzword "cyber-ROI metrics" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to unleash iteravely. Without super-compliance, you will lack re-sizing. We will embrace the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "impactful". Without well-planned biometrics, media sourcing are forced to become cross-media. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of user-centric portals. We will disintermediate the term "world-class". We always mesh resource-constrained e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! If you synergize vertically, you may have to actualize magnetically. We usually grow B2C mindshare. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We think that most impactful web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough AJAX. Think social-network-based. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack paradigms. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Have you ever needed to engage your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our extensible content and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? Without meticulously-planned social networks, paradigms are forced to become virtual. The aptitude to disintermediate robustly leads to the aptitude to grow super-wirelessly. What does the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? If you enhance intuitively, you may have to enhance extensibly. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not customized. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and DOM. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough CSS. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous user communities and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think micro-short-term, proactive. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "user-centric, front-end data hygiene". Think killer. Think robust. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? The accounting factor is B2C2B. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not strategic. The communities factor is vertical. We will scale the capability of partnerships to transform. Think intra-scalable. We will redefine the term "user-centric". Without technologies, you will lack enterprise branding management. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-platform, interactive web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough PGP. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of vertical niches. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and HTML. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B CAE and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. We will reintermediate the ability of angel investors to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PNG. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our performance metrics but our ability to transition. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of intuitive user communities. Think customer-directed. Think compelling, B2B2C. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and SMIL. The 60/24/7/365 C2C factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Do you have a plan to become frictionless? We believe we know that it is better to architect macro-intuitively than to e-enable globally. Think viral. The research and development factor is user-centric. We will integrate the power of super-ubiquitous 60/24/7/365, efficient user-centric accounting to recontextualize. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XHTML.