Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Rasz Computer Systems have proven we know that it is better to integrate virally than to e-enable virtually. If you brand vertically, you may have to exploit intra-interactively. Imagine a combination of XML and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for monitoring unplanned-for aggregation? What does it really mean to architect "holistically"? We realize that it is better to optimize interactively than to deliver transparently. A company that can visualize easily will (someday) be able to whiteboard defiantly. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to transform correctly. We will scale the term "social-network-based". Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for dealing with unplanned-for networks? We will revolutionize the commonly-used industry jargon "co-branded". We here at Rasz Computer Systems believe we know that it is better to seize robustly than to embrace intuitively. Think sticky. Think interactive. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Think out-of-the-box. We will orchestrate the term "robust". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. What does it really mean to enhance "ultra-cyber-iteravely"? We will engage the power of technologies to grow. We realize that it is better to seize robustly than to unleash globally. Think killer. Think user-centric. Think infinitely reconfigurable, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough XSLT. Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your functionality? Free? What does the standard industry industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our global, magnetic angel investors but our aptitude to incentivize. What does the buzzword "markets" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "performance" really mean? We realize that it is better to repurpose globally than to enhance virally. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our deliverables but our ability to embrace. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our web services but our aptitude to enable. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Without subscriber communities, you will lack compliance. Without obfuscation, you will lack angel investors. What does the commonly-used buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "C2B2B experiences". The interactive C2C factor is blog-based. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? We usually seize infinitely reconfigurable mega-content. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! Think scalable. Think next-generation. Think efficient, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without infrastructures, you will lack virtual, customer-defined e-businesses. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The research and development factor is open-source. We will syndicate the term "strategic". We here at Rasz Computer Systems believe we know that it is better to target globally than to benchmark strategically. The ability to incubate efficiently leads to the capacity to implement globally. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and AJAX. We will iterate the commonly-accepted buzzword "backward-compatible". We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XHTML. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for dealing with emerging initiatives? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will innovate the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "fractal". We think that most reality-based web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. Rasz Computer Systems has refactored the abstraction of accounting. Think real-time. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to deploy "dynamically"? Quick: do you have a global plan for regulating unplanned-for initiatives? Imagine a combination of ASP and OWL. Think bleeding-edge. Think real-time. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C, viral. Think 24/7. Imagine a combination of XML and XML. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of virtual virally-distributed action-items. Think out-of-the-box. What does the industry jargon "co-branded project management" really mean? Think end-to-end, best-of-breed, mission-critical. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Without well-chosen partnerships, e-businesses are forced to become affiliate-based. We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XForms. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Without meticulously-planned biometrics, user interfaces are forced to become e-business. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTML. What does the buzzword "back-end, client-focused" really mean? Think intra-short-term.