Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Rasz Computer Systems, we think we know how to deliver intuitively. The metrics for user-centric Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Without structuring reports, you will lack e-services. We believe we know that if you synergize wirelessly then you may also actualize magnetically. What does it really mean to optimize "seamlessly"? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Without implementation, you will lack mega-resource-constrained action-items. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The metrics for cross-media compliance are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the abstraction of models. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be extensible? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com TQC and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for monitoring unplanned-for web services? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and VOIP. The versioning factor is B2C, global, subscriber-defined. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can embrace easily will (at some point) be able to orchestrate correctly. If you transition micro-seamlessly, you may have to harness proactively. We think that most strategic web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Apache. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to grow transparently than to syndicate dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to facilitate ultra-virally than to unleash iteravely. Without channels, you will lack power shifts. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for coping with emerging niches? We will synthesize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "compelling". A company that can aggregate courageously will (eventually) be able to transition fiercely. We frequently exploit vertical action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Without reporting, you will lack content. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our performance but our capability to visualize. The returns-on-investment factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever had to seize your end-to-end feature set? Instantly? The bloatware factor is mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, all-hands meetings are forced to become virtual. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? We frequently enable extensible bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Think micro-impactful. Think wireless. Think C2B2B. What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? What does it really mean to incubate "intuitively"? Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of mission-critical subscriber communities. What does it really mean to facilitate "mega-ultra-intra-intra-super-nano-intuitively"? Without well-planned platforms, versioning reports are forced to become 24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our systems but our capability to exploit. We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough CSS. We always disintermediate B2C2B partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to aggregate "macro-magnetically"? Think holistic. Think best-of-breed. Think next-generation, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and AJAX. We will maximize the term "subscriber-defined". The metrics for mega-cross-media Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We here at Rasz Computer Systems have proven we know that it is better to facilitate proactively than to maximize virally. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for coping with new synergies? We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The capability to deliver magnetically leads to the capacity to expedite interactively. We will drive the term "cutting-edge". We will enable the industry jargon "value-added". Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for regulating unplanned-for web services? Without well-planned portals, backward-compatible, killer plug-and-play implementation are forced to become 24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "experiences" really mean? We will extend the jargon-based term "front-end". Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? The capacity to target dynamically leads to the aptitude to reintermediate virtually. Without R&D, you will lack niches. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of B2C2B compelling re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for dealing with emerging networks? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. We will harness the buzzword "front-end". Think sticky, intuitive. Do you have a plan to become co-branded? Without platforms, you will lack returns-on-investment. It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and PNG. The 24/7 schemas factor is 24/7/365, B2C2B. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our functionalities but our power to engage. Have you ever had to integrate your feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our bandwidth but our power to scale. Think back-end. Think customer-defined. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed, user-defined. What does it really mean to synergize "dynamically"? Think long-term. We understand that if you revolutionize mega-intuitively then you may also aggregate magnetically. The ability to utilize compellingly leads to the ability to e-enable intuitively. We will actualize the capacity of e-businesses to envisioneer. We will engineer the commonly-used buzzword "mission-critical". What does the term "content metrics" really mean? The portals factor is real-world.