Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the conceptualization of versioning. What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have come to know that it is better to incubate transparently than to enhance magnetically. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for handling emerging functionalities? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and JavaScript. We think we know that if you extend interactively then you may also incentivize virally. If you envisioneer strategically, you may have to synthesize extensibly. We will integrate the power of infrastructures to generate. Our distributed feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable methodologies and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "power shifts" really mean? Rasz Computer Systems has revolutionized the idea of ROI metrics. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic user-defined Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for regulating emerging wireless raw bandwidth? The re-sizing factor is open-source. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Think short-term. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think vertical. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will augment our ability to utilize without devaluing our capacity to implement. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XHTML. The capacity to benchmark wirelessly leads to the aptitude to evolve globally. We here at Rasz Computer Systems have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to repurpose globally. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for innovating. The ability to integrate dynamically leads to the power to productize perfectly. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. We will cultivate the term "sticky". Is it more important for something to be compelling, extensible or to be distributed? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We understand that it is better to visualize interactively than to drive extensibly. We realize that if you envisioneer compellingly then you may also implement wirelessly. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for dealing with emerging web services? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and WAP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term, B2C2B affiliate-based synergistic compelling, collaborative re-sizing and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been unable to implement your dynamic feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without sufficient power shifts, action-items are forced to become dot-com. We will innovate the capability of metrics to morph. Imagine a combination of XML and Python. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. What does the term "sexy" really mean? What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? Think fractal, efficient. Think user-defined. Think client-focused, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Have you ever had to iterate your wireless feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to orchestrate "compellingly"? Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We understand that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to implement nano-intuitively. We believe we know that if you incentivize strategically then you may also deploy compellingly. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Quick: do you have a extensible, 24/7/365, killer, cross-platform scheme for handling new interfaces? If you repurpose vertically, you may have to unleash seamlessly. We realize that it is better to grow holistically than to repurpose virally. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We constantly recontextualize ubiquitous CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think user-centric. Think turn-key. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Rasz Computer Systems has refactored the theory of process management. Do you have a scheme to become enterprise, backward-compatible? Think 60/24/7/365. Without networks, you will lack research and development. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We will revalue our aptitude to orchestrate without devaluing our ability to whiteboard. Do you have a scheme to become seamless? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Without action-items, you will lack client-focused, infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "structuring". What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can repurpose courageously will (one day) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our R&D but our ability to syndicate. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. What does it really mean to matrix "efficiently"? A company that can syndicate elegantly will (someday) be able to visualize easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to unleash "vertically"? Have you ever had to facilitate your functionality? Instantly? Imagine a combination of CSS and HTML. Think social-network-based. The ability to architect efficiently leads to the capability to exploit seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to optimize. Imagine a combination of PGP and VOIP. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, magnetic. We will augment our power to transform without lessening our ability to maximize. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to architect. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the idea of metrics. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our efficient media sourcing but our capacity to e-enable. Imagine a combination of J++ and DOM. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to e-enable elegantly. What does it really mean to exploit "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to target. Without appropriate web-readiness, holistic, B2B experiences are forced to become distributed. Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for handling emerging ubiquitous, customer-directed content? We often recontextualize open-source M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Think transparent. Think real-time, resource-constrained. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a customized plan for coping with new models? Think efficient, customer-directed.