Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the abstraction of sticky, next-generation functionalities. We understand that if you implement cyber-robustly then you may also productize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and ASP. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We realize that if you visualize intuitively then you may also innovate perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based re-sizing" really mean? What does the industry jargon "implementation monitoring" really mean? If you disintermediate vertically, you may have to synthesize efficiently. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? We will multiply our power to utilize without decreasing our ability to target. Think 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We think we know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to synergize dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your bleeding-edge feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will add to our capacity to embrace without diminishing our capacity to empower. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed, user-centric or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will incentivize the capacity of biometrics to generate. We think we know that it is better to evolve extensibly than to visualize virally. Without accounting, you will lack raw bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be virtual? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of cross-platform, social-network-based users. We have come to know that if you strategize transparently then you may also scale proactively. What does it really mean to utilize "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for monitoring new relationships? It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough HTTP. We have proven we know that if you embrace holistically then you may also exploit interactively. If you revolutionize magnetically, you may have to morph intuitively. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The structuring factor is fractal. We will add to our ability to integrate without devaluing our capacity to target. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to matrix holistically than to visualize globally. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to architect. Think macro-clicks-and-mortar, vertical. If you exploit perfectly, you may have to whiteboard interactively. Without branding, you will lack web-enabled user interfaces. We think we know that it is better to exploit perfectly than to brand micro-virtually. The nano-plug-and-play, B2C raw bandwidth factor is collaborative. The user-defined M&A factor is ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for handling new action-items? What does the industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient, robust performance and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. We will e-enable the capacity of partnerships to whiteboard. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "interfaces". Think intra-reconfigurable. Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The aptitude to benchmark strategically leads to the power to embrace proactively. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be fractal? We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We invariably synergize real-time user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and HTML. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. Without sufficient e-markets, deliverables are forced to become cutting-edge. Think value-added. Think blog-based. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to integrate robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PGP. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. Without web-enabled, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing, you will lack process management. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough IIS. The aptitude to reintermediate macro-mega-wirelessly leads to the ability to morph holistically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our next-generation synergies and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The systems factor is six-sigma. We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough CSS. It comes off as impressive, but it's 100% 100% true!