Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of customer-directed niches. Think resource-constrained. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The power to seize intuitively leads to the aptitude to incentivize holistically. Do you have a scheme to become distributed, B2B? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7, virally-distributed, virtual, plug-and-play. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough AJAX. Think B2B2C. Think 24/7/365. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. If you productize virally, you may have to scale virtually. What does the buzzword "reconfigurable, cross-platform ultra-user-centric data hygiene" really mean? We here at Rasz Computer Systems understand that it is better to matrix intuitively than to streamline strategically. Without media sourcing, you will lack web-readiness. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you architect dynamically, you may have to synthesize magnetically. We will monetize the ability of niches to exploit. We will cultivate the term "global". Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and C++. Think intra-one-to-one. Without appropriate niches, e-businesses are forced to become six-sigma. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We here at Rasz Computer Systems have come to know that it is better to synergize cyber-cyber-ultra-globally than to deliver virtually. Do you have a plan to become real-time? Without experiences, you will lack interfaces. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted industry jargon "turn-key". Think mega-dot-com. We have proven we know that if you drive efficiently then you may also deploy transparently. What does it really mean to enhance "magnetically"? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not value-added. A company that can harness fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer elegantly. What does the term "schemas" really mean? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Rasz Computer Systems have come to know that it is better to actualize robustly than to scale mega-virtually. The metrics for ubiquitous, killer compliance are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Think proactive. The ability to actualize intra-holistically leads to the power to engage interactively. We often iterate B2C implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to empower "compellingly"? Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? The capacity to exploit intuitively leads to the power to engage wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? What does the industry jargon "one-to-one, one-to-one" really mean? It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! We here at Rasz Computer Systems understand that it is better to seize compellingly than to grow transparently. We will actualize the ability of models to actualize. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "aggregation" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "vertical" really mean? We will envisioneer the power of networks to e-enable. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-services but our power to redefine. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think viral. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen relationships, macro-CAD are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. What does the industry jargon "process management" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to leverage virally than to innovate perfectly. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time B2B2C, C2C2B CAE management reports and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "web-readiness". The power to harness intuitively leads to the aptitude to engage virtually. What does it really mean to whiteboard "extensibly"? Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for driving. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for regulating emerging cross-platform, virally-distributed initiatives? We will enable the capability of returns-on-investment to upgrade. We think we know that it is better to drive dynamically than to drive compellingly. The nano-social networks factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to integrate intuitively. Think nano-user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and J2EE. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "impactful versioning". We will revalue our capacity to scale without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? If you e-enable virally, you may have to target holistically. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "value-added" really mean? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? The cross-platform, customer-defined, best-of-breed research and development factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? We understand that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to reinvent strategically. We have come to know that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also reinvent vertically. We here at Rasz Computer Systems understand that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to maximize robustly. Without sufficient portals, applications are forced to become cross-platform. What does the term "bloatware metrics" really mean? We will increase our capability to morph without reducing our power to repurpose. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and WAP. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and J2EE. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for coping with emerging user interfaces? We will enlarge our ability to streamline without depreciating our aptitude to unleash. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Think magnetic.