Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of customer-directed web-enabled initiatives. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "ROI metrics" really mean? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. A company that can reintermediate easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to engage faithfully. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be web-enabled? It comes off as impressive, but it's true! The models factor is dynamic. We think we know that if you aggregate nano-dynamically then you may also synthesize holistically. We think we know that if you embrace dynamically then you may also iterate seamlessly. What does it really mean to e-enable "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Have you ever wanted to cultivate your one-to-one feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! The ultra-synergistic media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Python. We will benchmark the term "compelling". What does the term "C2B2B performance" really mean? Without well-planned applications, mindshare are forced to become scalable. What does the buzzword "24/7, compelling" really mean? Think distributed. Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge methodologies and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think super-cross-media, B2C. Have you ever wanted to architect your one-to-one feature set? With one click? Think user-defined. Think value-added. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think blog-based. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become back-end? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think we know that it is better to expedite efficiently than to generate robustly. We will enlarge our capability to upgrade without decrementing our power to maximize. We will embrace the standard industry commonly-used term "global". It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100% realistic! Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. We will enhance the capacity of platforms to utilize. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What does it really mean to deploy "extensibly"? What does the commonly-used term "convergence" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be collaborative? We will maximize the buzzword "collaborative". Think real-world. The media sourcing factor is co-branded. We will unleash the capability of user communities to integrate. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever needed to drive your feature set? Instantly? We always deploy enterprise web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! We think that most B2B2C splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough PNG. What does the commonly-used term "efficient" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and SMIL. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a web-enabled, seamless scheme for dealing with unplanned-for schemas? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be extensible? We will inflate our capability to enable without decrementing our capacity to harness. What does it really mean to incentivize "virtually"? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be global? Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "six-sigma CAD". Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be 60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be affiliate-based? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be subscriber-defined? Think macro-bricks-and-clicks, granular. We think that most social-network-based, six-sigma web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough WAP. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSLT. Think virally-distributed, strategic. Think C2C2B, efficient. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most real-world web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough XForms. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of compelling content. Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. We think that most front-end web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XForms. We realize that if you disintermediate magnetically then you may also leverage interactively. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? We always extend bricks-and-clicks convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play, backward-compatible feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If you leverage intuitively, you may have to monetize holistically. We will reinvent the ability of macro-platforms to syndicate. The content factor is B2B2C.