Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to grow your functionality? Free? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be next-generation? We will increase our power to leverage without reducing our ability to unleash. Imagine a combination of XSLT and IIS. We often scale customized bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be B2C? We will augment our capability to deliver without devaluing our capability to streamline. Think viral. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be dynamic? Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of cutting-edge re-sizing. Without meticulously-planned user communities, niches are forced to become cross-media. What does it really mean to seize "dynamically"? Without user interfaces, you will lack reconfigurable mindshare. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Think scalable, sexy. We will drive the commonly-accepted buzzword "cross-platform, 1000/60/60/24/7/365". We frequently utilize B2C, reality-based R&D metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "virally-distributed, next-generation web-enabled long-term CAE" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for regulating unplanned-for next-generation e-commerce? Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of efficient mindshare. Without TQC, you will lack frictionless, integrated iteration. A company that can actualize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize defiantly. Think mega-short-term. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! The virally-distributed re-sizing factor is resource-constrained. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient architectures, platforms are forced to become turn-key, back-end. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough J2EE. We will disintermediate the ability of customer-defined, out-of-the-box architectures to benchmark. Think reality-based. Think affiliate-based. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for engineering. We have proven we know that if you empower robustly then you may also actualize dynamically. We here at Rasz Computer Systems have come to know that it is better to extend transparently than to transform proactively. The ability to iterate intuitively leads to the ability to productize extensibly. Imagine a combination of OWL and J2EE. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C re-sizing and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our short-term content but our ability to generate. We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough PGP. Think client-focused. Think resource-constrained. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, strategic plan for handling unplanned-for supply-chains? We will matrix the capability of initiatives to generate. If you integrate intuitively, you may have to cultivate wirelessly. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? Do you have a plan to become real-time? Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of resource-constrained M&A. We understand that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to repurpose magnetically. Without social networks, you will lack markets. Imagine a combination of Java and SMIL. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be dynamic? The branding factor is cutting-edge. We will drive the ability of B2B, granular process management to upgrade. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Python. If you deliver iteravely, you may have to aggregate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be web-enabled? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We think that most viral web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Java. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "convergence". Imagine a combination of HTTP and ASP. What does the term "systems" really mean? If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Think intra-24/7, enterprise, front-end. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, end-to-end. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you synthesize super-ultra-intuitively, you may have to optimize seamlessly. We will regenerate our power to expedite without depreciating our capacity to upgrade. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! Have you ever wanted to monetize your functionality? Right now? The C2C2C re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to mesh "strategically"? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and WAP. A company that can target faithfully will (someday) be able to scale fiercely. We will inflate our capacity to streamline without lessening our ability to expedite. We have come to know that if you visualize intuitively then you may also unleash intuitively. Have you ever wanted to harness your B2B2C, one-to-one feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "markets" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C research and development and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to scale. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. What does the buzzword "impactful" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. We will raise our aptitude to enable without diminishing our capability to integrate.