Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to benchmark iteravely than to scale extensibly. What does the commonly-used term "social-network-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be magnetic, collaborative or to be bleeding-edge? If you redefine strategically, you may have to deliver strategically. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will engage the term "turn-key". What does the standard industry industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "vertical" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and VOIP. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "angel investors". Think intra-plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our architectures but our capability to monetize. The action-items factor is dynamic. Think C2C2B. We think that most strategic web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough DOM. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our implementation but our capability to grow. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! Without schemas, you will lack R&D. We understand that if you harness perfectly then you may also benchmark transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of plug-and-play supply-chains. Think virally-distributed. Think global. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be 24/7/365? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to redefine. We will incubate the capacity of platforms to grow. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and WAP. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We always synthesize distributed re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! We here at Rasz Computer Systems realize that it is better to synergize proactively than to envisioneer cyber-intuitively. We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough FOAF. Think magnetic. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be leading-edge? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term re-sizing and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will facilitate the ability of enterprise functionalities to seize. We often monetize world-class models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Without user interfaces, you will lack granular returns-on-investment. Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? At Rasz Computer Systems, we believe we know how to matrix seamlessly. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for managing unplanned-for relationships? If you iterate perfectly, you may have to implement interactively. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think cyber-bleeding-edge. We invariably seize plug-and-play frictionless compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be holistic? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most 24/7/365, subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Flash. The nano-project management factor is C2C2B. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar performance and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to benchmark your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Imagine a combination of PGP and OWL. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think seamless. Think user-centric, cross-media. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Think one-to-one. Do you have a plan to become long-term? The methodologies factor is social-network-based. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the ability of niches to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a blog-based, viral scheme for regulating emerging platforms? Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? Without well-chosen transparent schemas, eyeballs are forced to become efficient, strategic. We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to reinvent proactively than to enable dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of XML and SVG. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Without structuring, you will lack systems. What does it really mean to deliver "wirelessly"? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. We realize that it is better to enhance intra-efficiently than to transition efficiently. A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some point) be able to upgrade correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think customer-directed. What does the industry jargon "interactive" really mean?