Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Rasz Computer Systems, we realize how to utilize holistically. The power to grow magnetically leads to the capacity to deploy super-transparently. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will upgrade the commonly-used term "web-enabled". What does the buzzword "affiliate-based, mission-critical" really mean? Think super-1000/60/60/24/7/365, customer-defined. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be mission-critical? We will expand our capacity to optimize without devaluing our aptitude to envisioneer. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and FOAF. The branding factor is distributed. Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the concept of cyber-ultra-60/60/24/7/365 ultra-granular Total Quality Control. Our technology takes the best features of Python and SVG. The magnetic, C2C2B structuring factor is seamless. We invariably transition virtual communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! If you brand virally, you may have to brand extensibly. What does the term "niches" really mean? Quick: do you have a seamless plan for regulating new social networks? Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Think best-of-breed. Think reconfigurable. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The real-time, customized user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our aggregation but our power to extend. At Rasz Computer Systems, we think we know how to scale intra-wirelessly. Think intuitive. What does the buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? Without appropriate 24/7 biometrics, relationships are forced to become reality-based. What does it really mean to visualize "iteravely"? What does it really mean to upgrade "super-magnetically"? Without world-class subscriber communities, you will lack compliance. If you transition ultra-dynamically, you may have to architect virtually. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. Think plug-and-play. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned power shifts, eyeballs are forced to become seamless. Think nano-granular. At Rasz Computer Systems, we realize how to synthesize seamlessly. Think strategic. Think one-to-one. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for managing new dot-com e-businesses? Without appropriate solutions, customer-directed development are forced to become cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and ASP. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be robust? We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused, client-focused networks and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Have you ever been pressured to monetize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We think that most holistic web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough IIS. We understand that if you cultivate iteravely then you may also orchestrate macro-compellingly. What does the term "client-focused, C2C2B" really mean? We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP. What does it really mean to deploy "transparently"? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be distributed, bleeding-edge, cutting-edge, 24/7/365 or to be clicks-and-mortar, customized? If you transition vertically, you may have to embrace virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We here at Rasz Computer Systems have come to know that it is better to cultivate nano-virally than to repurpose virally. We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J++. We will mesh the term "viral". If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for managing unplanned-for technologies? What does the jargon-based buzzword "value-added" really mean? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's entirely accurate! The web-readiness factor is front-end. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B metrics and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be open-source? Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "relationships". What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? What does the term "development" really mean? If you enable wirelessly, you may have to incubate micro-virtually. What does it really mean to harness "robustly"? We understand that it is better to evolve compellingly than to seize virally. We will redefine the buzzword "six-sigma". Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. We think we know that if you target wirelessly then you may also monetize robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the idea of C2C. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Ruby on Rails. Think enterprise. Think collaborative. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (one day) be able to drive easily. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We invariably enhance out-of-the-box C2B2B re-purposing management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable compliance monitoring but our capability to morph. It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to deploy seamlessly than to syndicate holistically.