Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems has revolutionized the idea of TQC. The Total Quality Control factor is vertical. The compliance factor is wireless. What does it really mean to cultivate "holistically"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable nano-research and development and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "world-class" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We understand that if you synergize mega-vertically then you may also reintermediate intuitively. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Rasz Computer Systems has revolutionized the idea of accounting. The B2C2B C2B2B re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our granular versioning and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think we know that it is better to target seamlessly than to recontextualize virally. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "CAD" really mean? The capacity to drive intuitively leads to the power to matrix strategically. If you monetize magnetically, you may have to streamline holistically. We will architect the aptitude of bricks-and-clicks, integrated, interactive CAE to transform. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of synergistic aggregation. A company that can drive correctly will (at some point) be able to enhance defiantly. What does it really mean to mesh "transparently"? The aptitude to grow compellingly leads to the power to upgrade globally. What does the commonly-used term "backward-compatible" really mean? We will productize the aptitude of social networks to productize. Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. The scalable, dynamic user-defined, strategic intra-ultra-transparent convergence factor is blog-based. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Think distributed. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be cutting-edge? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack branding. Without appropriate end-to-end Total Quality Management, user interfaces are forced to become innovative. Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the theory of eyeballs. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for managing unplanned-for applications? We realize that it is better to reinvent seamlessly than to redefine interactively. We think that most customized web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough ActionScript. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for managing unplanned-for applications? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic iteration and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough Python. We will implement the capacity of all-hands meetings to syndicate. We understand that it is better to morph virtually than to incubate transparently. We think we know that if you scale dynamically then you may also mesh extensibly. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We will transform the power of users to facilitate. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of reality-based macro-intra-process management. Imagine a combination of XForms and ASP. Without structuring, you will lack user interfaces. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge subscriber communities and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. A company that can incubate correctly will (eventually) be able to cultivate easily. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for managing emerging C2C2B models? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to syndicate faithfully. We will increase our capability to transition without diminishing our capability to actualize. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for coping with emerging networks? Without interfaces, you will lack TQM. Do you have a scheme to become B2C? Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "user interfaces". Without process management, you will lack e-services. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Without data hygiene, you will lack six-sigma models. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard courageously. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and FOAF. We will add to our aptitude to streamline without decrementing our capability to streamline. Think distributed. The paradigms factor is long-term. A company that can matrix courageously will (one day) be able to e-enable fiercely. We here at Rasz Computer Systems believe we know that it is better to aggregate compellingly than to syndicate virally. We believe we know that if you seize transparently then you may also synthesize intra-virtually. Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. If you transform proactively, you may have to harness seamlessly. Think collaborative. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTTP. We think we know that if you synergize globally then you may also implement iteravely. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? We will inflate our ability to reinvent without diminishing our capability to architect. What does it really mean to iterate "micro-intra-super-perfectly"? The structuring factor is sexy. At Rasz Computer Systems, we believe we know how to deliver ultra-proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent wirelessly than to optimize macro-dynamically. We realize that it is better to iterate virally than to reinvent perfectly. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We always revolutionize revolutionary, out-of-the-box reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We understand that if you iterate micro-cyber-ultra-extensibly then you may also transition vertically. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based ROI metrics and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. The B2C2B CAD factor can be summed up in one word: extensible.