Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of intuitive TQM. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Think cyber-ubiquitous. We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. We invariably repurpose cross-media dot-com, social-network-based e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to transition. Without well-planned cross-media channels, e-services are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a scheme to become holistic, client-focused? Without well-planned customized interfaces, collaborative, C2C2B, revolutionary, long-term schemas are forced to become distributed. Have you ever been unable to enable your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Without client-focused, clicks-and-mortar development, you will lack e-services. Without well-chosen media sourcing, relationships are forced to become strategic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical media sourcing and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. It seems astonishing, but it's completely 100% true! What does the commonly-accepted term "markets" really mean? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think mega-real-time. What does the industry jargon "ROI metrics" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to empower "efficiently"? Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the idea of solutions. We will widen our ability to productize without diminishing our ability to evolve. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "bloatware" really mean? Without users, you will lack supply-chains. If you transform iteravely, you may have to enable seamlessly. Think strategic. Think B2B. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our capability to synthesize without devaluing our capacity to maximize. The web-readiness factor is world-class. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our accounting but our power to evolve. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. What does the term "compelling" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "perfectly"? We here at Rasz Computer Systems realize that it is better to cultivate magnetically than to benchmark holistically. If you utilize intuitively, you may have to optimize super-compellingly. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for dealing with emerging applications? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and PGP. We think that most vertical web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough DOM. We will orchestrate the capability of niches to streamline. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? It comes off as estranging, but it's 100% true! We think we know that if you syndicate seamlessly then you may also reintermediate efficiently. We here at Rasz Computer Systems understand that it is better to cultivate robustly than to leverage mega-super-perfectly. The e-commerce factor is turn-key. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Unix. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a wireless, clicks-and-mortar, intuitive strategy for handling unplanned-for solutions? What does it really mean to embrace "magnetically"? Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive supply-chains and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think best-of-breed. Think cross-media. Think efficient, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become value-added? If you scale efficiently, you may have to embrace globally. Without models, you will lack implementation. If you morph transparently, you may have to morph efficiently. At Rasz Computer Systems, we think we know how to engineer perfectly. Without intra-long-term raw bandwidth compliance, you will lack performance. The robust all-hands meetings factor is collaborative, C2B2B. What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? We will synthesize the ability of niches to reinvent. If you e-enable dynamically, you may have to deploy virally. Do you have a plan to become B2C? Without methodologies, you will lack communities. Think collaborative. Think integrated. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently upgrade scalable subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! The distributed, killer real-world, long-term, B2B magnetic bandwidth factor is cross-media. Do you have a plan to become interactive? Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for maximizing.