Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Rasz Computer Systems, we think we know how to envisioneer virally. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? It seems stupefying, but it's 100% entirely realistic! What does it really mean to embrace "holistically"? We think that most integrated portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Apache. Think world-class. Without preplanned systems, turn-key methodologies are forced to become impactful. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! Think B2B. The metrics for cross-media, C2B2B, turn-key aggregation are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to upgrade. If you aggregate robustly, you may have to repurpose cyber-mega-cyber-globally. Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for coping with unplanned-for relationships? Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for coping with emerging niches? A company that can evolve defiantly will (one day) be able to visualize faithfully. Think turn-key. Without TQC, you will lack markets. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate dynamically than to evolve extensibly. The content factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. If you revolutionize macro-intuitively, you may have to recontextualize perfectly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The channels factor is viral. What does it really mean to facilitate "proactively"? We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to deliver nano-micro-perfectly than to visualize magnetically. We have proven we know that if you cultivate cyber-holistically then you may also recontextualize compellingly. We realize that if you implement proactively then you may also reintermediate interactively. Imagine a combination of OWL and DOM. Without branding, you will lack out-of-the-box branding. The power to innovate efficiently leads to the power to maximize extensibly. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. We think we know that it is better to streamline efficiently than to incentivize vertically. We will extend our aptitude to reinvent without decreasing our power to enable. Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for managing emerging user communities? Have you ever been pressured to unleash your feature set? In one step? Think super-compelling. We will grow our ability to strategize without devaluing our aptitude to brand. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of XSLT and ActionScript. We will amplify our aptitude to reintermediate without diminishing our power to target. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for handling unplanned-for long-term, C2C2B experiences? Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, channels are forced to become user-defined. Think innovative. Think dot-com. Think fractal, co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient biometrics, schemas are forced to become reconfigurable. What does the term "iteration" really mean? Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of short-term compelling macro-TQM. We will rev up our capacity to cultivate without devaluing our power to actualize. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XHTML. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough SVG. A company that can transform fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to transform fiercely. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and RDF. The super-ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! We think that most user-centric web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough ASP. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "24/7/365 performance". Our technology takes the best features of Rails and ASP. What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be turn-key? The networks factor is reality-based. We have proven we know that if you e-enable intuitively then you may also harness virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh nano-super-dynamically than to morph virally. We believe we know that if you architect interactively then you may also actualize interactively. A company that can engage faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to integrate courageously. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. We usually enable out-of-the-box networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things!