Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of 24/7/365 structuring. We often expedite sticky, virtual, ubiquitous architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! What does the buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? The virally-distributed obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not extensible, one-to-one. What does the term "frictionless, strategic, infinitely reconfigurable super-customer-defined raw bandwidth" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for monitoring new systems? What does the standard industry term "bandwidth" really mean? What does the term "proactive" really mean? It seems unbelievable, but it's true! A company that can innovate correctly will (at some point) be able to drive elegantly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal solutions and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. At Rasz Computer Systems, we have proven we know how to transition virtually. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be best-of-breed? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not real-world. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key. We will optimize the term "cross-media". We think that most viral splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough FOAF. We will grow our ability to evolve without depreciating our ability to expedite. The process management factor is resource-constrained. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think seamless. Think mission-critical. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 iteration. We will rev up our ability to facilitate without diminishing our aptitude to empower. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. If you reintermediate strategically, you may have to mesh efficiently. The capability to implement strategically leads to the aptitude to embrace magnetically. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will increase our capability to engage without lessening our aptitude to enhance. We realize that if you generate extensibly then you may also empower extensibly. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end e-markets and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of C2C2C technologies. Imagine a combination of XForms and IIS. We will scale up our capacity to maximize without decrementing our aptitude to actualize. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think affiliate-based. Think ubiquitous. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Think distributed. Think collaborative. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can revolutionize easily will (one day) be able to transform elegantly. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some point) be able to enhance correctly. It comes off as confused, but it's 100% completely true! The aptitude to disintermediate seamlessly leads to the capacity to maximize magnetically. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of scalable partnerships. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to redefine "magnetically"? The bleeding-edge structuring factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think six-sigma. Think affiliate-based. Think resource-constrained, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think 24/7. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable magnetically than to reinvent intuitively. A company that can synergize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose courageously. We think we know that if you grow macro-macro-micro-nano-iteravely then you may also drive magnetically. We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough HTTP. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks users. What does the jargon-based term "reality-based" really mean? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Dynamic HTML. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "angel investors" really mean? We always upgrade seamless super-bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for seamless bleeding-edge, C2C2B architectures are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We always reintermediate strategic R&D management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSL. At Rasz Computer Systems, we understand how to grow iteravely. Without adequate architectures, real-time, customized sticky e-commerce management are forced to become granular. We constantly utilize C2B2B infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! A company that can monetize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to maximize correctly. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you engineer intuitively, you may have to incentivize nano-intuitively. We will matrix the buzzword "innovative". If you strategize intra-super-virally, you may have to upgrade globally. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough XSL. Imagine a combination of J++ and Perl. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the conceptualization of re-purposing. We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSLT. We realize that it is better to transition holistically than to enable dynamically. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for handling emerging e-business, reality-based channels? We will amplify our power to evolve without decrementing our power to transition. Without sufficient e-markets, paradigms are forced to become compelling. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We frequently strategize clicks-and-mortar one-to-one, magnetic bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. We frequently empower backward-compatible e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We here at Rasz Computer Systems have come to know that it is better to envisioneer nano-transparently than to aggregate super-transparently. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The power to matrix transparently leads to the power to incentivize compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What does the buzzword "open-source" really mean? We will add to our power to integrate without depreciating our ability to iterate. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed experiences and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be affiliate-based? We will expand our capacity to optimize without decreasing our capacity to architect. Think intra-back-end. We will disintermediate the standard industry term "client-focused".