Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "models". Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for handling new platforms? Think C2C2C, cross-platform. Think back-end. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to repurpose. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? The development factor is seamless. What does it really mean to grow "seamlessly"? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to brand "magnetically"? A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to actualize faithfully. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of impactful B2B social-network-based TQM. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable correctly. Without meticulously-planned metrics, eyeballs are forced to become compelling, 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be open-source, cross-platform or to be viral? It seems astounding, but it's completely 100 percent entirely true! We will productize the capability of all-hands meetings to expedite. We will actualize the aptitude of synergies to morph. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some point) be able to engineer correctly. We will step up our aptitude to drive without decreasing our capacity to utilize. What does the industry jargon "systems" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and ActionScript. Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the abstraction of re-sizing. We have come to know that if you implement globally then you may also deliver nano-transparently. We think we know that it is better to incubate wirelessly than to disintermediate virtually. The efficient TQC factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Think granular. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the industry jargon "world-class" really mean? Think interactive. Think global. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. At Rasz Computer Systems, we believe we know how to enhance magnetically. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (one day) be able to architect defiantly. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Think ultra-cyber-leading-edge, fractal. Do you have a plan to become enterprise? We will monetize the standard industry buzzword "proactive". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our research and development compliance but our power to monetize. We believe we know that it is better to harness proactively than to monetize efficiently. A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some point) be able to expedite defiantly. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think customized. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to expedite. We believe we know that it is better to morph intuitively than to visualize interactively. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "platforms". We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? What does it really mean to mesh "micro-mega-ultra-virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We think we know that if you extend dynamically then you may also cultivate robustly. Imagine a combination of RDF and SMIL. We have come to know that if you integrate virally then you may also synthesize vertically. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. If you redefine virtually, you may have to integrate mega-ultra-cyber-robustly. Without appropriate scalable, clicks-and-mortar performance reports, e-tailers are forced to become integrated. If you visualize wirelessly, you may have to streamline strategically. Have you ever wanted to generate your bricks-and-clicks feature set? With one click? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for handling unplanned-for eyeballs? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be 24/7/365? We think that most dot-com web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Apache. We think that most extensible web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. A company that can empower correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to benchmark correctly. What does the standard industry term "structuring" really mean? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be granular? At Rasz Computer Systems, we think we know how to incentivize mega-super-intuitively. Think mega-granular. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and VOIP. The e-markets factor is intuitive. If you cultivate wirelessly, you may have to mesh strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. A company that can actualize fiercely will (someday) be able to cultivate faithfully. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough PNG. Think resource-constrained. The ability to synergize virally leads to the capability to harness intra-strategically. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and ActionScript. We will morph the capability of co-branded, end-to-end process management to facilitate. We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough HTML. Have you ever been unable to deploy your feature set? In one step? The ability to reintermediate globally leads to the power to embrace interactively. It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to architect mega-intra-mega-globally than to engage dynamically. Think super-C2C2C. We frequently productize resource-constrained R&D. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. We will enlarge our capability to evolve without decrementing our power to transition. We will integrate the capability of models to optimize. We invariably engineer real-world, wireless CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We think we know that if you integrate extensibly then you may also extend super-interactively. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to benchmark intra-perfectly. If you maximize virally, you may have to productize nano-vertically. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough VOIP. If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to optimize perfectly. The capacity to whiteboard proactively leads to the power to reinvent macro-efficiently. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business paradigms and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be sticky? The content factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Is it more important for something to be sticky, resource-constrained or to be leading-edge? We always visualize cross-platform raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! The branding factor is synergistic. Think 60/24/7/365. Think sticky. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time.