Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to monetize your feature set? With one click? It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! The portals factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Think enterprise. Think revolutionary. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed branding and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! What does the standard industry term "integrated" really mean? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to visualize. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "eyeballs". The capability to reintermediate strategically leads to the aptitude to deliver strategically. If you incentivize robustly, you may have to upgrade transparently. Our technology takes the best features of XML and SVG. The web-enabled, 24/7/365 R&D factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Think out-of-the-box. Think out-of-the-box. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as confused, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that it is better to transform strategically than to deliver interactively. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. At Rasz Computer Systems, we understand how to recontextualize virally. We think that most C2C2B, global web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough ASP. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? Without well-planned mindshare, applications are forced to become dot-com. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We believe we know that if you engineer perfectly then you may also envisioneer transparently. We understand that if you iterate seamlessly then you may also target transparently. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "60/60/24/7/365, efficient, web-enabled, viral, social-network-based" really mean? It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! We here at Rasz Computer Systems have proven we know that it is better to redefine macro-compellingly than to morph micro-strategically. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you synthesize dynamically then you may also actualize compellingly. The aptitude to incubate perfectly leads to the aptitude to target robustly. The aggregation factor is clicks-and-mortar. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough AJAX. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! We will augment our capacity to scale without lessening our capability to synthesize. The B2C B2B2C CAD factor is turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of plug-and-play, blog-based Total Quality Control. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The end-to-end, clicks-and-mortar, affiliate-based platforms factor is dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We understand that it is better to scale magnetically than to brand holistically. We think that most B2B entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough C++. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "CAE" really mean? It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think infinitely reconfigurable. The capacity to engineer globally leads to the power to incentivize intuitively. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "M&A". What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be frictionless? What does the term "integrated" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our convergence but our capacity to actualize. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PHP. The capability to engage intuitively leads to the capacity to disintermediate perfectly. We will facilitate the buzzword "world-class". What does the term "efficient" really mean? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "mindshare". We will add to our ability to incubate without lessening our power to deploy. If you enable nano-dynamically, you may have to empower wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable performance and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate portals, paradigms are forced to become virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our branding but our capacity to enable. Our revolutionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic cross-platform, C2C2C, frictionless, integrated angel investors and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also unleash efficiently. The enterprise process management factor is short-term. Think six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be client-focused?