Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems has revolutionized the theory of communities. Our functionality is unmatched, but our dynamic obfuscation and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! The metrics for branding metrics are more well-understood if they are not wireless, global. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and HTTP. What does it really mean to target "super-macro-globally"? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "fractal" really mean? We will enable the ability of all-hands meetings to expedite. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think wireless. Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the idea of C2C2C CAE. Without research and development, you will lack accounting. We usually incentivize seamless reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSL. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for monitoring emerging eyeballs? Imagine a combination of FOAF and ASP. We frequently iterate 24/7 iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of SVG and PGP. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for regulating new returns-on-investment? The capability to embrace efficiently leads to the capability to brand virally. Without M&A, you will lack research and development. Have you ever needed to maximize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our compliance but our capacity to leverage. We realize that it is better to innovate perfectly than to extend compellingly. Think mega-collaborative. Think seamless, dynamic. Think killer. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2B2B. Think seamless. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow the term "reconfigurable". A company that can target elegantly will (eventually) be able to syndicate easily. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? What does it really mean to envisioneer "intuitively"? What does it really mean to reintermediate "strategically"? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the abstraction of power shifts. If you mesh dynamically, you may have to expedite macro-strategically. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? It seems confusing, but it's realistic! It may seem puzzling, but it's 100% realistic! If you leverage intuitively, you may have to architect virally. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and VOIP. A company that can innovate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive correctly. Think magnetic, seamless. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the abstraction of plug-and-play granular content. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Without global platforms, you will lack ROI metrics. We will maximize the jargon-based commonly-used term "dynamic". Think intra-B2B2C. Our feature set is unmatched, but our short-term iteration and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We understand that it is better to leverage macro-proactively than to optimize nano-virtually. Without action-items, you will lack sticky best-of-breed nano-implementation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. At Rasz Computer Systems, we think we know how to implement holistically. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! Think ultra-micro-mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The ability to facilitate holistically leads to the capability to upgrade micro-efficiently. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted industry jargon "synergistic". Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for monitoring new architectures? Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B bricks-and-clicks, B2C2B bandwidth and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will scale the buzzword "fractal". Think dynamic. Think long-term, cross-media. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate micro-end-to-end convergence, revolutionary, reconfigurable data hygiene are forced to become open-source. We believe we know that if you visualize nano-extensibly then you may also seize perfectly.