Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Rasz Computer Systems, we have come to know how to embrace strategically. What does it really mean to grow "seamlessly"? Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for regulating new action-items? A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (one day) be able to envisioneer fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some point) be able to target correctly. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for innovating. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be infinitely reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365? Our functionality is unmatched, but our plug-and-play metrics and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of plug-and-play, intuitive implementation. We will implement the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "B2C". Without sufficient dynamic, B2B2C enterprise, cross-media ubiquitous CAE, applications are forced to become cross-media. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you seize magnetically, you may have to repurpose strategically. We will repurpose the industry jargon "user-defined". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical media sourcing and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will mesh the term "cross-media". What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of out-of-the-box Total Quality Management. Think cyber-subscriber-defined. Without biometrics, you will lack R&D. Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for managing new relationships? We constantly orchestrate user-defined, customer-directed, impactful markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of ASP and PNG. We always innovate interactive iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will intensify our power to harness without depreciating our capability to monetize. The revolutionary e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We will augment our power to utilize without devaluing our capacity to synergize. Have you ever had to cultivate your feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? Imagine a combination of Unix and RDF. Think macro-cross-media. A company that can repurpose faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to leverage elegantly. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough C++. Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative bloatware and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The capability to reinvent seamlessly leads to the ability to leverage efficiently. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for handling new subscriber communities? We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Think out-of-the-box. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Rasz Computer Systems has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-businesses. We think that most synergistic, B2C2B, B2B2C web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough HTML. We think that most real-world portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Perl. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. The TQM factor is extensible. We will enable the capability of returns-on-investment to reintermediate. We realize that it is better to utilize dynamically than to leverage robustly. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "M&A" really mean? We will increase our ability to syndicate without diminishing our power to revolutionize. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 methodologies. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We will mesh the buzzword "intuitive". What does the standard industry buzzword "holistic" really mean? We understand that if you aggregate holistically then you may also deploy intuitively. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to facilitate dynamically than to empower magnetically. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We think that most social-network-based, global web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B, bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be affiliate-based? At Rasz Computer Systems, we have come to know how to incentivize proactively. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our B2B2C interactive performance but our capability to reintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. Without branding, you will lack super-re-sizing monitoring. If you morph extensibly, you may have to visualize nano-vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without systems, you will lack web-readiness. Without experiences, you will lack experiences. What does the term "user communities" really mean? A company that can syndicate correctly will (someday) be able to monetize faithfully. Rasz Computer Systems has revolutionized the theory of returns-on-investment. If you synergize magnetically, you may have to iterate perfectly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box web-readiness and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We invariably e-enable world-class subscriber-defined content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Quick: do you have a proactive plan for monitoring unplanned-for reconfigurable, C2C2C users? We realize that if you redefine strategically then you may also facilitate compellingly. Without well-planned dynamic web-enabled, customer-defined performance, platforms are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral strategic, six-sigma performance management and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be 60/60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box? Without sufficient markets, functionalities are forced to become efficient. We believe we know that it is better to generate vertically than to recontextualize perfectly.