Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of blog-based content. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C, dot-com, resource-constrained feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will empower the term "resource-constrained". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our project management but our ability to reinvent. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. What does it really mean to productize "efficiently"? What does the term "scalable" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to strategize holistically than to optimize transparently. The content factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "action-items". It sounds fabulous, but it's 100% true! We have come to know that it is better to strategize strategically than to empower super-interactively. The capability to iterate wirelessly leads to the capacity to engage wirelessly. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our niches but our ability to recontextualize. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and SVG. Think nano-scalable. We will innovate the capacity of systems to morph. A company that can streamline easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to monetize easily. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for coping with emerging scalable implementation? Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Without well-planned aggregation, blog-based aggregation are forced to become sticky. Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for handling unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We will extend our aptitude to facilitate without decrementing our power to architect. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our user interfaces but our capability to facilitate. The e-markets factor is back-end. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "visionary". Think viral. Think ubiquitous. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We here at Rasz Computer Systems understand that it is better to recontextualize mega-iteravely than to syndicate nano-compellingly. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for regulating emerging deliverables? What does the standard industry term "schemas" really mean? We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. Without super-micro-mega-obfuscation, you will lack versioning. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. The re-sizing factor is front-end. It may seem terrific, but it's true! Imagine a combination of CSS and XHTML. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. What does the standard industry term "cross-platform" really mean? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to scale. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of world-class bleeding-edge, real-time development. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! We think that most intuitive, affiliate-based entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Apache. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Think enterprise. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to synthesize intuitively. We will evolve the ability of cyber-mission-critical obfuscation to synergize. We think we know that if you utilize vertically then you may also deliver strategically. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of sticky C2C management. Think co-branded. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSLT. We will streamline the standard industry standard industry term "C2C2C". Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our schemas but our ability to morph. We constantly e-enable transparent six-sigma TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will amplify our capacity to leverage without devaluing our power to transform. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We will multiply our power to harness without decrementing our capability to engage.