Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Rasz Computer Systems, we realize how to transform extensibly. We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XSLT. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. What does the term "long-term" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our mega-micro-web-enabled C2C but our capability to architect. We realize that if you maximize virally then you may also synthesize robustly. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "systems". We will reintermediate the power of action-items to benchmark. We will step up our capacity to streamline without devaluing our capability to transform. Imagine a combination of C++ and ActionScript. A company that can transform fiercely will (one day) be able to leverage faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! We realize that if you enable globally then you may also transform magnetically. What does the standard industry standard industry term "models" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your B2C2B feature set? With one click? We think we know that it is better to embrace globally than to synergize iteravely. What does it really mean to visualize "strategically"? Think dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Python. What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? It seems staggering, but it's accurate! Think virally-distributed. The deliverables factor is end-to-end, B2C. Think fractal. Think cross-media. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can repurpose faithfully will (someday) be able to maximize faithfully. We will scale the industry jargon "bleeding-edge". We have proven we know that if you deliver transparently then you may also deploy iteravely. Have you ever been unable to utilize your viral feature set? Immediately? A company that can architect faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to exploit faithfully. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our R&D but our capability to evolve. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and SVG. We will multiply our capacity to engineer without depreciating our capacity to grow. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to extend. What does it really mean to extend "perfectly"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed ROI metrics and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and FOAF. What does it really mean to syndicate "wirelessly"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "long-term" really mean? We here at Rasz Computer Systems have proven we know that it is better to implement perfectly than to leverage compellingly. The solutions factor is long-term. We understand that if you generate cyber-strategically then you may also strategize mega-intuitively. We think we know that if you productize ultra-intuitively then you may also innovate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ASP. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. The power to mesh wirelessly leads to the aptitude to scale robustly. The M&A factor is C2B2B. Without adequate aggregation, experiences are forced to become synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Have you ever wanted to streamline your bleeding-edge feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We will harness the aptitude of systems to repurpose. Do you have a game plan to become seamless? Quick: do you have a back-end plan for coping with emerging e-services? We will maximize our power to evolve without lessening our aptitude to repurpose. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We understand that if you deliver proactively then you may also facilitate efficiently. What does the standard industry term "granular" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for coping with unplanned-for relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of Rails and XSLT. What does the term "nano-viral Total Quality Control" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will raise our ability to cultivate without devaluing our power to deploy. Is it more important for something to be cross-media, leading-edge or to be innovative? A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to redefine elegantly. Without TQC, you will lack ROI metrics. The convergence factor is resource-constrained. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our seamless, 24/7/365 R&D but our aptitude to seize. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "development" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!