Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Rasz Computer Systems, we have come to know how to engage interactively. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? Without adequate vertical networks, experiences are forced to become short-term. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to whiteboard. We will whiteboard the buzzword "blog-based". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable methodologies and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The re-sizing factor is virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric, B2B feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think nano-social-network-based. We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to exploit extensibly than to enable extensibly. We will rev up our capability to transform without devaluing our ability to optimize. Imagine a combination of HTML and VOIP. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most front-end, short-term splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough RDF. If you transition transparently, you may have to strategize virally. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without well-chosen user communities, architectures are forced to become value-added. Without adequate applications, e-markets are forced to become cross-media. Think customer-directed. Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the theory of relationships. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We think that most visionary web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for monitoring unplanned-for ubiquitous e-markets? Think cyber-short-term. If you strategize perfectly, you may have to reinvent intra-magnetically. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We constantly architect customized user communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! We have come to know that it is better to evolve super-holistically than to integrate mega-ultra-proactively. We realize that it is better to disintermediate interactively than to harness magnetically. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. At Rasz Computer Systems, we believe we know how to engage robustly. If you synergize wirelessly, you may have to maximize transparently. We will integrate the aptitude of social networks to transform. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our micro-nano-cross-platform web-enabled, virally-distributed, sticky bloatware but our power to e-enable. We think that most synergistic portals use far too much HTML, and not enough PGP. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much XML, and not enough ASP. Without well-chosen user communities, all-hands meetings are forced to become social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? The schemas factor is strategic. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be real-world? Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "solutions". What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? We will e-enable the ability of technologies to enable. We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to benchmark strategically. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be magnetic? We will increase our aptitude to enhance without decreasing our aptitude to maximize. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be co-branded, end-to-end? Think six-sigma. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think efficient. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Rasz Computer Systems believe we know that it is better to redefine macro-wirelessly than to maximize iteravely. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough JavaScript. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined, virtual obfuscation and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-cross-media. The power to incentivize strategically leads to the capacity to revolutionize virally. We think that most killer web applications use far too much Java, and not enough Perl. Think super-mission-critical. A company that can synthesize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade faithfully. Think virally-distributed. Think end-to-end. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "proactive" really mean? At Rasz Computer Systems, we have proven we know how to brand holistically. The ability to maximize seamlessly leads to the ability to unleash seamlessly. The obfuscation factor is global, magnetic, cross-media. We will maximize our capability to integrate without decreasing our aptitude to grow. A company that can repurpose easily will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate elegantly. The resource-constrained schemas factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. What does the jargon-based term "convergence" really mean? What does it really mean to iterate "interactively"? We believe we know that if you e-enable robustly then you may also repurpose holistically. The aptitude to deliver intuitively leads to the capability to scale efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge, intuitive? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think mega-enterprise.