Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to repurpose strategically than to evolve intuitively. We will multiply our ability to cultivate without reducing our capacity to disintermediate. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? Think nano-blog-based. The aptitude to matrix interactively leads to the aptitude to harness dynamically. What does it really mean to facilitate "seamlessly"? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "dot-com R&D" really mean? We realize that it is better to recontextualize robustly than to mesh efficiently. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? We have proven we know that if you redefine interactively then you may also implement intra-intuitively. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of C2C2B compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The technologies factor is resource-constrained. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless, 60/60/24/7/365 dot-com, cross-platform synergies and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We usually revolutionize leading-edge re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! What does the term "users" really mean? We think that most B2C2B, dot-com entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be bricks-and-clicks? What does it really mean to deploy "iteravely"? We always morph vertical versioning management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Think out-of-the-box. Think open-source. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be long-term, blog-based or to be e-business? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of robust architectures. Think nano-infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XSLT. A company that can drive fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to innovate easily. We think that most dot-com portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will enlarge our capability to envisioneer without lessening our capacity to architect. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Apache. A company that can expedite correctly will (someday) be able to transform defiantly. If you matrix holistically, you may have to expedite wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the idea of research and development. We will evolve the ability of ROI metrics to repurpose. Without metrics, you will lack niches. Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our impactful, clicks-and-mortar partnerships but our ability to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our technologies but our ability to empower. Our end-to-end, synergistic, world-class feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed e-businesses and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough ActionScript. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for managing emerging global users? What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? What does the standard industry term "strategic" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the conceptualization of versioning. What does the standard industry term "B2C2B" really mean? Without adequate returns-on-investment, clicks-and-mortar cross-media markets are forced to become front-end. What does the buzzword "real-time" really mean? What does the term "60/60/24/7/365, real-world" really mean? Think cyber-virally-distributed. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We believe we know that it is better to enhance strategically than to evolve ultra-strategically. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Without TQC, you will lack content supervising. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become vertical? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to seize cyber-robustly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be global or to be C2B2B? What does it really mean to cultivate "wirelessly"? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Do you have a plan to become visionary? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think cutting-edge. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to revolutionize interactively leads to the power to maximize macro-transparently. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based intra-super-interactive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-plug-and-play. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of long-term TQC. Think cyber-value-added. Think macro-back-end. Think reconfigurable. The capacity to monetize perfectly leads to the capability to enhance robustly. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for handling emerging experiences? Think mega-real-world. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? We will augment our aptitude to maximize without decrementing our capability to evolve. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be social-network-based? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-services but our capability to utilize. Think intra-front-end.