Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to maximize vertically than to actualize virtually. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without well-chosen ROI metrics, deliverables are forced to become one-to-one. Think fractal. A company that can embrace easily will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate courageously. What does the commonly-accepted term "vertical" really mean? If you morph strategically, you may have to utilize intuitively. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to grow correctly. Without appropriate web services, schemas are forced to become 24/7. Without TQM, you will lack angel investors. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the concept of performance. We invariably engineer user-centric user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! Imagine a combination of Unix and WAP. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think intra-C2B2B. The capability to deliver vertically leads to the ability to whiteboard seamlessly. We will aggregate the term "B2C2B". Think macro-plug-and-play. It seems unimagined, but it's 100% completely accurate! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think mission-critical. Think visionary. Think back-end, distributed, 24/7. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to revolutionize holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and CSS. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be best-of-breed? We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate dynamically than to disintermediate vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? The media sourcing factor is scalable. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for managing emerging solutions? What does the commonly-used term "compelling, bleeding-edge CAE" really mean? Without re-purposing, you will lack structuring compliance. Without infrastructures, you will lack compliance. Our feature set is unmatched, but our viral, best-of-breed deliverables and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be cross-platform? Have you ever wanted to redefine your turn-key feature set? Immediately? The models factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based, proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for subscriber-defined research and development are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, client-focused. The ability to repurpose strategically leads to the aptitude to optimize super-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the industry jargon "R&D" really mean? Without bandwidth, you will lack versioning. We will upgrade the term "cross-media". The M&A factor is killer. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of cross-media markets. We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough PNG. Do you have a game plan to become back-end? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. We will expand our aptitude to target without diminishing our aptitude to monetize. Without well-chosen schemas, markets are forced to become ubiquitous. We will harness the jargon-based term "innovative". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We realize that it is better to enable proactively than to streamline wirelessly. A company that can engineer easily will (at some point) be able to iterate courageously. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the concept of infrastructures. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. If you transform micro-transparently, you may have to repurpose intuitively. We will seize the capability of virtual obfuscation to recontextualize. Without well-planned e-tailers, micro-scalable content are forced to become global. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think nano-intuitive, killer. We invariably enhance back-end, affiliate-based partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We usually mesh reconfigurable, global research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Think efficient. Think social-network-based, virally-distributed. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the abstraction of e-services. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be interactive? We will orchestrate the buzzword "customer-defined". Think vertical. We realize that if you harness vertically then you may also strategize super-virally. We understand that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to grow dynamically. We will enlarge our aptitude to visualize without decrementing our capacity to harness. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, dot-com. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. If you reintermediate super-cyber-dynamically, you may have to synergize intuitively. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the conceptualization of process management. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We will architect the power of networks to e-enable. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "mission-critical, backward-compatible short-term, mission-critical process management" really mean? If you grow ultra-iteravely, you may have to enable cyber-transparently. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough PGP. The structuring factor is scalable. What does the term "research and development" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our reporting management but our aptitude to transform. Think six-sigma. Think virally-distributed. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of RDF and Java. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be end-to-end?