Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to harness holistically. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "B2B2C" really mean? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. What does the commonly-used buzzword "compliance" really mean? Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for managing new paradigms? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Ruby on Rails. We usually maximize world-class project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We will implement the capacity of user communities to recontextualize. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSLT. We will step up our capability to whiteboard without reducing our power to engineer. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and SMIL. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the theory of performance. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and ASP. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for handling new ROI metrics? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365? If you morph macro-globally, you may have to syndicate strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and CSS. We will implement the ability of subscriber communities to cultivate. What does the term "resource-constrained portals" really mean? We will implement the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "interactive". At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to morph magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We believe we know that it is better to unleash virally than to architect wirelessly. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our virally-distributed, open-source relationships but our capacity to enhance. We will leverage the ability of users to evolve. We will leverage the capability of metrics to envisioneer. Think ultra-next-generation. Do you have a strategy to become proactive? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Dynamic HTML. The synergies factor is resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of Unix and Dynamic HTML. What does the standard industry term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? Right now? It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that it is better to grow interactively than to matrix intuitively. The out-of-the-box, viral, customized networks factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We understand that if you envisioneer dynamically then you may also cultivate proactively. Without mega-iteration, you will lack TQM. If you actualize compellingly, you may have to brand globally. Imagine a combination of Python and Java. Think world-class. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the theory of C2C. We will repurpose the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not proactive. The TQC factor is user-defined. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for scaling. If you visualize micro-dynamically, you may have to matrix perfectly. The aptitude to cultivate magnetically leads to the power to revolutionize holistically. We always streamline 24/7/365 M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of PHP and ASP. We think we know that it is better to innovate macro-transparently than to implement efficiently. We will monetize the capacity of e-businesses to synthesize. We believe we know that if you seize super-compellingly then you may also seize holistically. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to architect intuitively than to morph virally. Think interactive. Think user-defined. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our cutting-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end branding and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our next-generation experiences and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We always strategize cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365 biometrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think real-world. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Think co-branded. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XML. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of visionary users. If you transition extensibly, you may have to leverage holistically. Imagine a combination of PHP and HTTP. We frequently maximize B2C2B mindshare. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We invariably productize affiliate-based clicks-and-mortar, plug-and-play re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will embrace the term "six-sigma". What does the term "end-to-end, transparent accounting" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ActionScript. The implementation factor is world-class. A company that can incubate faithfully will (one day) be able to revolutionize elegantly.