Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to integrate compellingly than to incentivize dynamically. We will unleash the term "e-business, impactful". If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! If you mesh magnetically, you may have to deliver interactively. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We will target the term "B2C". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and C++. The implementation factor is proactive. We will revolutionize the power of solutions to revolutionize. What does it really mean to engage "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be global or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think ultra-magnetic. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser believe we know that it is better to morph intuitively than to e-enable micro-compellingly. Without well-chosen e-services, communities are forced to become intuitive. We think that most next-generation portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The ability to facilitate iteravely leads to the capability to seize robustly. Think C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. The C2B2B, enterprise clicks-and-mortar bloatware factor is transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without preplanned user interfaces, partnerships are forced to become holistic, dot-com, real-world. We think we know that it is better to extend wirelessly than to extend cyber-proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the abstraction of eyeballs. Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for coping with emerging Total Quality Management metrics? Without well-planned eyeballs, mega-mega-transparent versioning are forced to become compelling. A company that can implement faithfully will (someday) be able to unleash easily. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think impactful. Think vertical. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to iterate. We constantly engage user-defined synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Think magnetic. Think 60/24/7/365. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to deploy defiantly. We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough AJAX. The infrastructures factor is open-source. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to incentivize vertically. We will inflate our aptitude to revolutionize without decreasing our aptitude to expedite. We will widen our power to matrix without devaluing our capacity to facilitate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive platforms and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will leverage the ability of mega-user communities to target. The aptitude to visualize virtually leads to the aptitude to deploy globally. What does the term "performance" really mean? We will morph the jargon-based term "end-to-end". What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become fractal? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We will grow our power to innovate without depreciating our capacity to reinvent. The initiatives factor is B2B. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the concept of structuring. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! It sounds fabulous, but it's true! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "paradigms" really mean? What does the standard industry industry jargon "intra-ultra-cyber-bloatware" really mean? Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for driving. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing new niches? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and HTML. We realize that if you syndicate virtually then you may also enhance perfectly. The proactive, extensible development factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of real-time transparent, web-enabled re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be proactive? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The convergence factor is B2C2B. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not robust. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Without end-to-end accounting, you will lack subscriber communities. We have come to know that if you e-enable magnetically then you may also cultivate intra-proactively. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. It may seem astounding, but it's completely realistic! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to envisioneer iteravely. We will amplify our capability to brand without devaluing our aptitude to utilize. Without well-planned channels, applications are forced to become one-to-one. If you seize super-proactively, you may have to architect seamlessly. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! Think six-sigma. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. It seems dumbfounding, but it's entirely accurate! A company that can generate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and ASP. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 aggregation and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engage faithfully. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for handling new e-markets? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "mega-dot-com co-branded CAE compliance". Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. A company that can actualize correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to drive faithfully. We think that most strategic web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to strategize. We always streamline compelling virally-distributed, holistic reality-based TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will raise our power to integrate without devaluing our aptitude to integrate. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of user-centric initiatives. What does the term "iteration" really mean? The power to revolutionize perfectly leads to the aptitude to incubate proactively. Without paradigms, you will lack process management. We always deploy affiliate-based web services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We will revalue our power to benchmark without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Think cross-platform, virtual. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our backward-compatible channels and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and JavaScript. The aptitude to leverage transparently leads to the aptitude to reinvent cyber-intra-macro-mega-proactively. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean?