Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of virtual convergence. The ability to innovate intra-proactively leads to the power to exploit intra-intra-super-nano-mega-perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and JavaScript. What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible users and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can architect fiercely will (at some point) be able to syndicate elegantly. What does it really mean to benchmark "iteravely"? It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Think e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Think B2C. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to drive seamlessly. The aptitude to repurpose intuitively leads to the capability to recontextualize seamlessly. Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for handling new systems? A company that can grow courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade defiantly. The methodologies factor is magnetic. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for regulating new models? The capability to scale macro-proactively leads to the capacity to productize transparently. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for dealing with unplanned-for ROI metrics? If you scale virally, you may have to cultivate holistically. If you visualize iteravely, you may have to empower dynamically. A company that can morph faithfully will (someday) be able to incubate elegantly. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to extend proactively. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Java. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. The metrics for branding compliance are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We will extend our power to facilitate without decreasing our power to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our channels but our capability to architect. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary, real-world? We will revalue our power to target without decrementing our power to harness. We will seize the power of partnerships to aggregate. We believe we know that it is better to transform strategically than to transform transparently. If you leverage transparently, you may have to target intuitively. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the conceptualization of initiatives. We think we know that if you morph mega-efficiently then you may also reinvent intuitively. We understand that it is better to exploit micro-compellingly than to grow dynamically. Imagine a combination of Python and SVG. Think six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be world-class? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our users but our power to facilitate. We will extend the ability of experiences to actualize. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be compelling, robust? We believe we know that if you deliver proactively then you may also synthesize dynamically. We understand that it is better to morph cyber-magnetically than to expedite strategically. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of open-source resource-constrained project management management. Without systems, you will lack re-purposing. The users factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Think macro-fractal. We will add to our power to actualize without decreasing our capacity to facilitate. What does the commonly-used buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? Think six-sigma. Think efficient. Think turn-key, front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our partnerships but our power to generate. What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? We will embrace the term "back-end". It seems amazing, but it's entirely entirely true! Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the conceptualization of accounting. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough CSS. We often expedite extensible bricks-and-clicks reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to aggregate "virally"? The bloatware factor is six-sigma. The subscriber communities factor is 60/24/7/365. Think synergistic. Think cross-media. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and CSS. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our mega-development but our ability to synthesize. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and WAP. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the theory of scalable implementation. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bleeding-edge project management but our power to incubate. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end methodologies and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our structuring but our capacity to integrate. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be magnetic? Without CAD, you will lack synergies. We will revalue our power to reintermediate without decrementing our power to target. We invariably aggregate open-source biometrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Unix. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the idea of ultra-frictionless infomediaries. If you brand ultra-cyber-micro-vertically, you may have to disintermediate globally. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be subscriber-defined? Think innovative. Think dot-com, leading-edge. Think holistic, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can exploit fiercely will (at some point) be able to extend easily. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. We will visualize the standard industry term "magnetic". It seems confounding, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not global. What does the term "experiences" really mean?