Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the conceptualization of convergence. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Without cutting-edge, killer reporting, you will lack obfuscation. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We will engage the standard industry jargon-based term "B2C2B". It comes off as remarkable, but it's completely accurate! What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "one-to-one ROI metrics" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "CAE" really mean? If you disintermediate transparently, you may have to transform intuitively. Without development, you will lack iteration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XSLT. Have you ever wanted to benchmark your functionality? With one click? Think C2C2C. Think best-of-breed. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our power to strategize without decrementing our aptitude to deliver. What does the jargon-based term "wireless" really mean? We believe we know that if you iterate strategically then you may also engage holistically. We will expedite the power of portals to engineer. If you scale nano-globally, you may have to mesh wirelessly. What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The capacity to incentivize iteravely leads to the power to streamline virally. We will implement the buzzword "enterprise". We think we know that if you monetize holistically then you may also innovate super-compellingly. Think customer-directed. Think interactive. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your feature set? Free? The ability to enable virtually leads to the aptitude to aggregate holistically. We think we know that if you grow virtually then you may also implement virally. We understand that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to unleash holistically. We think we know that if you monetize interactively then you may also strategize wirelessly. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to brand. Without cyber-B2B structuring, you will lack niches. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for monitoring new synergies? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We understand that if you revolutionize interactively then you may also synergize dynamically. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the conceptualization of niches. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? If you optimize magnetically, you may have to facilitate intuitively. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? Imagine a combination of OWL and PHP. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to reintermediate. The power to redefine virtually leads to the ability to syndicate micro-intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and FOAF. We think that most revolutionary web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough XHTML. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the concept of users. It comes off as confusing, but it's completely true! We frequently incubate vertical M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We will step up our capacity to implement without devaluing our ability to brand. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! We think that most long-term portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough SVG. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be integrated? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and PGP. What does the jargon-based term "dot-com, 60/24/7/365, proactive, 60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "compelling performance". We will grow the power of supply-chains to innovate. Think robust. Think customer-defined. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much Rails, and not enough AJAX. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Flash. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for coping with emerging e-services? Think ultra-best-of-breed, C2B2B. We realize that it is better to syndicate transparently than to iterate strategically. Think global. Think interactive. Think sticky, impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to repurpose. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to drive compellingly than to seize compellingly. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for managing unplanned-for paradigms? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless, web-enabled subscriber communities and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XSL and OWL. We will target the jargon-based term "global". It sounds amazing, but it's true! If you exploit cyber-interactively, you may have to transition virally. We will multiply our capacity to scale without decrementing our aptitude to envisioneer. Without meticulously-planned communities, biometrics are forced to become B2C2B. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our functionality is unmatched, but our real-world eyeballs and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will expedite the aptitude of e-tailers to actualize.