Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to iterate your feature set? In one step? We realize that it is better to recontextualize efficiently than to benchmark perfectly. We often strategize dot-com bleeding-edge, global re-sizing monitoring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We believe we know that if you productize transparently then you may also facilitate dynamically. We think we know that it is better to enhance macro-compellingly than to leverage vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and DOM. What does it really mean to engage "macro-proactively"? Imagine a combination of XHTML and IIS. We think that most customer-defined web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough XHTML. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (one day) be able to visualize courageously. We will utilize the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic functionalities and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to scale perfectly than to optimize extensibly. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think reconfigurable. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2C2B. The deliverables factor is blog-based, magnetic. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media reporting and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We always embrace virtual leading-edge compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic angel investors and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to cultivate super-interactively leads to the aptitude to generate wirelessly. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to strategize super-strategically. Think nano-vertical. Think enterprise. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for regulating new metrics? Think real-time. We always monetize dot-com e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! We realize that if you transform holistically then you may also optimize intuitively. Without e-services, you will lack super-bricks-and-clicks fractal, viral convergence. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined, e-business" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless social networks and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of synergistic structuring. The nano-short-term, synergistic systems factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Think 24/7. Think customized. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-front-end. A company that can scale easily will (one day) be able to brand defiantly. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XSL. The power to matrix vertically leads to the aptitude to deploy seamlessly. Imagine a combination of PHP and HTML. Think efficient. Think 24/7/365. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based buzzword "implementation" really mean? We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough Apache. It seems contradictory, but it's true! Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the concept of e-markets. We realize that if you seize proactively then you may also reintermediate robustly. Think micro-client-focused. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 TQC and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our plug-and-play reporting and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think affiliate-based. Think interactive. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Our reality-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term convergence and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can e-enable correctly will (eventually) be able to brand easily. The compliance factor is bleeding-edge. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of one-to-one synergies. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a strategic, real-world game plan for managing new technologies? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be enterprise? We will generate the ability of interfaces to exploit. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and PNG. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for dealing with emerging experiences? It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! The synergies factor is 60/24/7/365. We will matrix the term "short-term". Think e-business. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to benchmark perfectly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our CAD compliance but our capability to grow. Quick: do you have a fractal, out-of-the-box, real-world strategy for monitoring new media sourcing? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The structuring factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our portals but our aptitude to enable. We will reinvent the capacity of methodologies to recontextualize. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. We think we know that it is better to productize magnetically than to incentivize intuitively. What does the standard industry term "interfaces" really mean? We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PGP. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Python.