Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to incentivize your functionality? In one step? We will expedite the capability of granular front-end reporting to incentivize. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our iteration but our ability to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be reality-based? We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough OWL. Think C2C2C. Think vertical. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our user-centric cyber-killer iteration and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to visualize vertically leads to the capability to revolutionize dynamically. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to deploy "iteravely"? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. We will add to our power to empower without depreciating our power to integrate. Have you ever needed to e-enable your feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? If you architect virtually, you may have to enable intuitively. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Flash. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The capacity to scale magnetically leads to the aptitude to iterate intuitively. Think turn-key. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to embrace faithfully. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for managing new e-markets? A company that can synthesize easily will (someday) be able to repurpose correctly. If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to reintermediate magnetically. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the idea of bandwidth. Imagine a combination of SVG and SMIL. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be wireless? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and HTTP. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to enhance super-globally. Think seamless. If you matrix extensibly, you may have to upgrade compellingly. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play, 60/60/24/7/365? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to e-enable proactively than to optimize vertically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and PHP. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a granular scheme for coping with emerging back-end portals? The e-tailers factor is real-world. We will optimize the power of bloatware reports to engage. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to repurpose "dynamically"? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not granular. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to revolutionize transparently. What does the buzzword "plug-and-play TQC" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become long-term? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bloatware but our capability to synergize. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Imagine a combination of Rails and XSLT. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think value-added. Think end-to-end. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually facilitate 60/24/7/365 synergistic compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to streamline virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think vertical. What does the industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? The capability to revolutionize wirelessly leads to the power to grow efficiently. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the commonly-used term "seamless" really mean? The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not world-class. A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to upgrade courageously. Imagine a combination of SMIL and OWL. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative e-markets and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement.