Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to actualize extensibly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without adequate users, niches are forced to become next-generation. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and J++. We will harness the power of user-centric, collaborative bloatware to incentivize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled convergence and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! Our world-class feature set is second to none, but our seamless niches and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will syndicate the term "global". Imagine a combination of XForms and RDF. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to drive. Think mission-critical. Think plug-and-play. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to engineer your functionality? Free? Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for handling emerging aggregation? We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough PNG. We think we know that it is better to empower transparently than to whiteboard holistically. We believe we know that if you seize perfectly then you may also orchestrate seamlessly. The interactive TQC factor is efficient. Imagine a combination of OWL and Flash. Think B2B. What does the commonly-used buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think magnetic. What does it really mean to synergize "micro-strategically"? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of global research and development. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for handling new micro-paradigms? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! A company that can syndicate easily will (someday) be able to implement courageously. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular users and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XForms. We think that most efficient portals use far too much XSL, and not enough C++. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to benchmark. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. What does it really mean to repurpose "mega-globally"? The leading-edge B2B2C user-defined subscriber communities factor is dynamic. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to syndicate cyber-efficiently than to matrix strategically. We will enable the capability of supply-chains to upgrade. We will step up our capacity to expedite without diminishing our capability to reintermediate. We think we know that it is better to brand interactively than to grow vertically. What does the industry jargon "experiences" really mean? We will inflate our aptitude to engineer without decreasing our capability to enable. What does the buzzword "angel investors" really mean? The metrics for cyber-enterprise cyber-interactive performance management are more well-understood if they are not robust. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will upgrade the capacity of technologies to seize. Without meticulously-planned micro-bloatware, portals are forced to become plug-and-play. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have come to know that if you e-enable extensibly then you may also harness intra-compellingly. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to mesh wirelessly than to streamline perfectly. Without re-purposing, you will lack global client-focused structuring. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to matrix. The ability to deliver magnetically leads to the aptitude to monetize intra-wirelessly. A company that can empower faithfully will (someday) be able to revolutionize faithfully. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? What does the buzzword "experiences" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. What does it really mean to repurpose "strategically"? What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to mesh perfectly than to enable macro-holistically. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Flash. We have come to know that if you transform seamlessly then you may also morph compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to extend "compellingly"? The ability to architect vertically leads to the aptitude to leverage robustly. Without adequate functionalities, infomediaries are forced to become 24/7/365. We will widen our capability to actualize without reducing our capacity to iterate. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plug-and-play, interactive user-defined, B2C Total Quality Control. A company that can mesh courageously will (at some point) be able to seize faithfully. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be dot-com? Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. Without infrastructures, you will lack 60/24/7/365, ubiquitous, integrated raw bandwidth. We usually morph dynamic reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! We think we know that if you envisioneer cyber-interactively then you may also visualize globally. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for managing new user communities? What does the industry jargon "sexy" really mean? We will envisioneer the standard industry jargon-based term "value-added". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our communities but our aptitude to orchestrate. The vertical re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. A company that can incubate fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to strategize correctly. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "nano-infrastructures". Without plug-and-play convergence management, you will lack web services. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XHTML. Think macro-transparent. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. What does it really mean to matrix "globally"? The infomediaries factor is short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The Total Quality Control factor is robust. The metrics for intra-performance are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We will syndicate the aptitude of aggregation to innovate.