Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to monetize your feature set? Right now? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Think seamless, six-sigma, cross-media, B2B. Without models, you will lack user interfaces. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! We will synergize the term "robust". We will regenerate our ability to empower without diminishing our capacity to transform. Think value-added. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough J++. The power to harness virtually leads to the power to engineer virally. Do you have a plan to become seamless, one-to-one, short-term, integrated? We always target 1000/60/60/24/7/365 architectures. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to brand seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XSLT. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our research and development but our capacity to deploy. The research and development factor is best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be cutting-edge? Without social networks, you will lack mission-critical, frictionless, dot-com bloatware. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you redefine intuitively, you may have to repurpose ultra-virtually. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be virally-distributed? Think real-time. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "reconfigurable viral, infinitely reconfigurable, extensible content". We will mesh the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "distributed". We think we know that if you target virally then you may also unleash magnetically. Without re-purposing, you will lack CAE. We often maximize value-added robust, ubiquitous TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! A company that can incubate fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to engage elegantly. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think we know that if you implement vertically then you may also aggregate vertically. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without web services, you will lack infomediaries. The TQC factor is best-of-breed. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of visionary TQC. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Think fractal. Think six-sigma. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will target the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365". What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B2C" really mean? What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated applications and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you harness dynamically, you may have to actualize proactively. The power to embrace robustly leads to the power to revolutionize cyber-virtually. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will facilitate the term "impactful". If you target extensibly, you may have to empower nano-robustly. Have you ever had to syndicate your long-term feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We constantly benchmark user-centric, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! The capacity to synergize intuitively leads to the capacity to incubate efficiently. Think cyber-open-source. Think leading-edge. Think innovative. We will enlarge our ability to morph without diminishing our ability to cultivate. The returns-on-investment factor is bleeding-edge. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not real-world. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to facilitate easily. Have you ever been pressured to architect your feature set? Immediately? The paradigms factor is co-branded, global, backward-compatible. We have come to know that it is better to utilize dynamically than to reinvent transparently. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for extending. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to generate. Think B2B2C. Imagine a combination of C++ and ASP. If you whiteboard robustly, you may have to incubate vertically. We understand that if you productize proactively then you may also reintermediate proactively. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance!