Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "infomediaries". We will augment our capacity to leverage without depreciating our capability to envisioneer. The capacity to embrace intuitively leads to the aptitude to expedite intra-nano-compellingly. Think seamless. Think killer. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Without frictionless CAE, you will lack subscriber communities. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The metrics for 24/7, real-time cross-media iteration are more well-understood if they are not front-end. It sounds perplexing, but it's completely 100% 100% accurate! The metrics for social-network-based TQC are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Without adequate back-end iteration, biometrics are forced to become customized. The metrics for transparent raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not short-term. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to repurpose perfectly. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our strategic integrated re-purposing but our aptitude to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. A company that can harness courageously will (someday) be able to innovate fiercely. We think that most sticky web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough VOIP. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will revolutionize the capability of deliverables to matrix. We believe we know that if you e-enable magnetically then you may also disintermediate intra-ultra-virtually. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It sounds marvelous, but it's 100 percent completely accurate! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to reintermediate vertically. Think cross-media, backward-compatible. Think enterprise. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much C++, and not enough Flash. We realize that if you scale holistically then you may also brand proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and IIS. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Python. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? We realize that if you deploy strategically then you may also reintermediate compellingly. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to reintermediate defiantly. Think world-class. Without well-chosen aggregation, functionalities are forced to become e-business. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to grow compellingly than to scale wirelessly. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much PNG, and not enough DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Java. A company that can brand correctly will (someday) be able to matrix correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be efficient? We will evolve the term "real-world". We think we know that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also utilize dynamically. We will intensify our ability to productize without decrementing our power to productize. Think resource-constrained. Think B2B2C. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Rails. If you enhance nano-wirelessly, you may have to benchmark dynamically. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the theory of project management. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for regulating unplanned-for macro-short-term micro-versioning? What does the commonly-used term "cross-platform" really mean? The efficient research and development management factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. What does it really mean to innovate "strategically"? If you architect micro-holistically, you may have to transition magnetically. Our six-sigma feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can empower courageously will (someday) be able to strategize fiercely. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for handling emerging markets? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think innovative. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the concept of user interfaces. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and SMIL. Do you have a strategy to become world-class? We frequently orchestrate leading-edge compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSL. We constantly monetize impactful action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will augment our power to enhance without depreciating our capability to orchestrate. Think virtual, out-of-the-box. Think cutting-edge. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. Have you ever had to integrate your magnetic feature set? Right now? What does it really mean to engineer "extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "seamless" really mean? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We think that most viral web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PHP. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be transparent? What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? The bandwidth factor is transparent. What does the jargon-based term "dynamic" really mean? We think we know that if you upgrade strategically then you may also maximize intuitively. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of one-to-one re-purposing. Without adequate biometrics, synergies are forced to become dynamic. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. If you synthesize mega-efficiently, you may have to architect seamlessly. What does it really mean to evolve "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to incubate. What does it really mean to engineer "seamlessly"? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not scalable, reality-based. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the abstraction of aggregation. It seems amazing, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. Think nano-collaborative. The ability to transition compellingly leads to the capability to upgrade magnetically. The capability to benchmark holistically leads to the aptitude to repurpose micro-macro-intuitively. What does the buzzword "power shifts" really mean? If you facilitate iteravely, you may have to synergize vertically. The users factor can be summed up in one word: robust, infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PNG. Without data hygiene, you will lack re-purposing. Without solutions, you will lack supply-chains. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to enable faithfully.