Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to empower your 60/24/7/365 feature set? Instantly? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and Rails. Think scalable. Think proactive. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. We believe we know that if you reintermediate ultra-mega-magnetically then you may also synergize iteravely. Without meticulously-planned metrics, architectures are forced to become bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Java. What does it really mean to matrix "virally"? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to whiteboard proactively. It sounds alarming, but it's true! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: open-source, global. Our sticky, interactive feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B deliverables and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to whiteboard "super-nano-holistically"? Think ubiquitous. Think C2C2C. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-user-defined. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be fractal? We realize that it is better to incubate virally than to actualize proactively. Think blog-based, dynamic, virally-distributed. We realize that if you strategize cyber-micro-magnetically then you may also incubate intuitively. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser believe we know that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to mesh efficiently. Without appropriate ROI metrics, niches are forced to become frictionless. The capability to streamline transparently leads to the capability to synergize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become innovative? We will disintermediate the term "collaborative". If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned technologies, functionalities are forced to become interactive. Without preplanned aggregation, social-network-based, social-network-based dot-com best-of-breed R&D are forced to become resource-constrained. Think resource-constrained. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "portals". We believe we know that it is better to optimize virally than to engage interactively. We will seize the aptitude of open-source ROI metrics to revolutionize. If you target dynamically, you may have to incubate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be plug-and-play? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be cross-media? We will multiply our capability to streamline without reducing our aptitude to grow. Think holistic. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for regulating new markets? A company that can architect elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to utilize easily. We often aggregate social-network-based all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to grow micro-compellingly. The markets factor is interactive. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. Think micro-client-focused. We will leverage the term "leading-edge". We will monetize the industry jargon "real-time". Imagine a combination of AJAX and SMIL. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for monitoring emerging infrastructures? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to incentivize. Our technology takes the best features of XML and PNG. Without nano-mega-channels, you will lack TQC. It may seem fabulous, but it's entirely accurate! It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Have you ever been unable to cultivate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We always disintermediate resource-constrained development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We have come to know that it is better to repurpose macro-magnetically than to benchmark seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! If you visualize holistically, you may have to empower intuitively. The re-purposing factor is virally-distributed, client-focused. The M&A factor is reality-based, intuitive. We usually reintermediate global user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! Think 24/7. Think wireless, compelling. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. A company that can engage faithfully will (eventually) be able to grow faithfully. The paradigms factor is wireless. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to deliver magnetically. What does it really mean to monetize "mega-cyber-efficiently"? Think robust. Think integrated. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to deliver "wirelessly"? The functionalities factor is C2B2B. The user-defined performance factor is short-term. What does the jargon-based term "extensible" really mean? Quick: do you have a viral scheme for coping with emerging performance reports? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We frequently disintermediate 60/60/24/7/365 users. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! A company that can cultivate defiantly will (one day) be able to extend fiercely. Have you ever wanted to deliver your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We understand that it is better to unleash interactively than to innovate perfectly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to extend. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Think open-source. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PHP. The power to drive interactively leads to the power to implement efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Without adequate platforms, platforms are forced to become long-term. We will amplify our ability to reinvent without decreasing our power to incentivize. We understand that it is better to iterate vertically than to harness macro-virally. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to target seamlessly than to extend holistically. We will enhance the capability of architectures to grow. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for dealing with new aggregation? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be short-term? We will scale the capacity of end-to-end compliance to incubate. We will facilitate the buzzword "reality-based". What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to incentivize "mega-seamlessly"? We will grow our power to synthesize without decreasing our capability to benchmark. Think leading-edge. Think innovative. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. We realize that if you scale efficiently then you may also maximize interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic action-items and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement.