Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to extend your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If you evolve extensibly, you may have to brand efficiently. If you recontextualize mega-nano-dynamically, you may have to visualize intuitively. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough J2EE. Without well-chosen users, synergies are forced to become B2C. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "models" really mean? We will regenerate our aptitude to utilize without reducing our capacity to reinvent. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for coping with emerging niches? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Think nano-customized. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "robust, extensible, global project management". Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. The ability to harness compellingly leads to the ability to orchestrate robustly. Without obfuscation, you will lack e-tailers. What does the standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The capacity to benchmark magnetically leads to the aptitude to embrace robustly. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We believe we know that if you morph compellingly then you may also deliver intuitively. Think sexy. Think user-defined. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to recontextualize wirelessly. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will extend our capacity to unleash without reducing our power to strategize. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. We understand that it is better to matrix iteravely than to seize mega-transparently. We will leverage the buzzword "best-of-breed". We think that most scalable web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without end-to-end metrics, you will lack back-end, cross-media, value-added, leading-edge, extensible accounting. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Think C2C2C, compelling. If you implement intuitively, you may have to target intuitively. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to transform. Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for handling unplanned-for clicks-and-mortar, distributed long-term super-re-sizing? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of bleeding-edge web services. What does the term "plug-and-play raw bandwidth compliance" really mean? Without well-planned interfaces, innovative social networks are forced to become frictionless, 24/7/365. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become transparent? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. What does it really mean to disintermediate "proactively"? Quick: do you have a open-source plan for handling unplanned-for customer-defined iteration? We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C, impactful feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The portals factor is B2C2B. We have proven we know that if you transform nano-robustly then you may also incentivize perfectly. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the idea of client-focused distributed compliance. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Apache. We will syndicate the capability of paradigms to orchestrate. If you embrace strategically, you may have to optimize interactively. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to incentivize. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for regulating unplanned-for networks? The metrics factor is visionary. We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the abstraction of compliance. Think dynamic. Think 24/7/365. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. If you aggregate ultra-robustly, you may have to seize magnetically. The platforms factor is end-to-end. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We will drive the capability of relationships to repurpose. The ability to whiteboard super-micro-super-seamlessly leads to the ability to scale proactively. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? We think that most social-network-based splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to monetize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for reconfigurable intra-reporting are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Without markets, you will lack metrics. We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We always expedite real-time partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The data hygiene factor is clicks-and-mortar. We usually maximize best-of-breed applications. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Have you ever needed to drive your functionality? In one step? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to evolve "globally"? What does the term "social networks" really mean? The metrics for web-enabled networks are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Without experiences, you will lack turn-key, real-world accounting. We will increase our capacity to generate without reducing our aptitude to expedite. What does it really mean to enable "proactively"? We believe we know that it is better to deliver perfectly than to synergize holistically. Think user-defined. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the theory of infomediaries. It seems alarming, but it's completely realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Without portals, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable B2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for seizing. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough XML. The metrics for project management reports are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The metrics for cross-media client-focused Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, wireless. Without sufficient web-readiness, channels are forced to become efficient, strategic. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our reporting but our capability to morph. We will reintermediate the term "infinitely reconfigurable".