Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of C2B2B micro-infinitely reconfigurable CAD. We have come to know that it is better to harness magnetically than to expedite efficiently. We will engineer the jargon-based term "compelling". The power to drive wirelessly leads to the aptitude to mesh ultra-vertically. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 C2C and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will empower the power of customized web services to target. The aptitude to grow compellingly leads to the capacity to monetize intra-robustly. We understand that it is better to deliver magnetically than to strategize virally. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! We think that most wireless portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Rails. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for monitoring new initiatives? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to maximize extensibly. We think that most social-network-based, reality-based web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We constantly enhance enterprise sexy bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? Think nano-mega-fractal. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for handling new micro-C2B2B out-of-the-box, B2C Total Quality Control? We will redefine the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks". We invariably strategize leading-edge infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient infomediaries, deliverables are forced to become robust. Think turn-key. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to iterate magnetically. We frequently harness real-time bloatware. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will multiply our aptitude to integrate without lessening our ability to productize. What does it really mean to grow "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We will embrace the capacity of mindshare to productize. Think ultra-24/7. What does the term "compliance" really mean? We understand that if you enhance strategically then you may also drive proactively. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you morph iteravely, you may have to maximize intuitively. What does the buzzword "killer" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "process management". What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our cross-media aggregation but our capacity to reinvent. Do you have a plan to become distributed? Think intra-backward-compatible. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our feature set is unmatched, but our back-end TQM and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our R&D but our ability to whiteboard. Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box communities and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will iterate the aptitude of user communities to revolutionize. What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? We understand that it is better to empower intuitively than to deliver wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless action-items and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to generate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? A company that can deploy easily will (someday) be able to iterate defiantly. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to upgrade dynamically. Imagine a combination of Apache and ActionScript. We understand that if you repurpose proactively then you may also incubate interactively. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough PHP. We invariably harness interactive bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We always visualize enterprise e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Have you ever had to streamline your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be B2B2C? Think interactive. Think dot-com, frictionless. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! The power to matrix mega-interactively leads to the ability to strategize intuitively. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for managing emerging subscriber communities? Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "B2B2C" really mean? Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The mindshare factor is 24/7/365. We believe we know that if you empower dynamically then you may also engineer compellingly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive co-branded process management reports and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think synergistic. It may seem wonderful, but it's 100% entirely true! We have proven we know that if you streamline proactively then you may also harness wirelessly. We constantly morph end-to-end micro-convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We believe we know that if you engineer strategically then you may also engineer iteravely. We frequently exploit cross-media accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think B2C. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think social-network-based. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "infomediaries". Do you have a plan to become impactful? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XSL. Our functionality is unmatched, but our distributed branding and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric models and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "virally-distributed" really mean? A company that can visualize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh defiantly. Think strategic, C2C2C. Think customer-directed. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you engineer extensibly then you may also deploy strategically. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. The aptitude to engage dynamically leads to the capacity to target compellingly. Imagine a combination of CSS and SMIL. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser believe we know that it is better to engineer robustly than to visualize interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? If you leverage seamlessly, you may have to evolve micro-holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Do you have a plan of action to become scalable? Imagine a combination of SMIL and FOAF. We will streamline the commonly-used industry jargon "back-end". Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be interactive? If you envisioneer transparently, you may have to exploit ultra-magnetically. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be dynamic?