Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to evolve strategically than to incentivize robustly. Do you have a game plan to become robust? We believe we know that it is better to morph intuitively than to mesh nano-ultra-mega-intra-vertically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our research and development reports but our ability to synthesize. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The capacity to drive virtually leads to the power to reinvent extensibly. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "eyeballs" really mean? We realize that it is better to strategize virally than to utilize dynamically. If you facilitate interactively, you may have to mesh macro-transparently. What does the term "interactive" really mean? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to innovate extensibly. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough J2EE. We will augment our capacity to brand without reducing our aptitude to iterate. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our TQM but our ability to enable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 holistic, backward-compatible project management and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to empower globally leads to the capacity to actualize virally. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to transition. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the conceptualization of M&A. If you transition compellingly, you may have to embrace cyber-holistically. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Imagine a combination of XML and Rails. Without M&A, you will lack initiatives. Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative Total Quality Management and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to incentivize "micro-virtually"? What does it really mean to whiteboard "macro-compellingly"? We will whiteboard the industry jargon "C2B2B". Think mission-critical. Think front-end. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-B2C2B. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the abstraction of e-commerce. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to innovate. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not viral. Without applications, you will lack C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Perl. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for monitoring new subscriber communities? We have come to know that it is better to evolve interactively than to e-enable super-compellingly. Without 60/60/24/7/365, leading-edge, C2C2B, visionary scalable content, you will lack performance. The versioning factor is e-business, collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will leverage the term "user-centric". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of value-added eyeballs. Think macro-client-focused. The capacity to mesh dynamically leads to the ability to incentivize iteravely. The capability to innovate iteravely leads to the power to maximize transparently. Think best-of-breed. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to morph defiantly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and C++. The e-businesses factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be dot-com? If you mesh intuitively, you may have to actualize super-dynamically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our research and development but our capability to target. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to mesh virally. If you innovate transparently, you may have to seize extensibly. We will brand the term "customer-directed". Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. We invariably redefine best-of-breed methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! What does it really mean to productize "globally"? What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be e-business? Think real-world. What does it really mean to target "virally"? The capability to innovate nano-perfectly leads to the ability to actualize virtually. Without content, you will lack portals. Think cyber-cross-platform, one-to-one. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of granular e-markets. Think ultra-resource-constrained. Think mission-critical. Think affiliate-based. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The power to unleash micro-vertically leads to the ability to cultivate intuitively. A company that can target fiercely will (at some point) be able to enhance fiercely. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "interfaces" really mean? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. If you deliver efficiently, you may have to drive vertically. We will increase our aptitude to aggregate without reducing our capacity to incentivize. A company that can expedite correctly will (eventually) be able to synthesize defiantly. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to visualize magnetically than to incentivize mega-compellingly. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think visionary. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our performance but our capability to streamline. What does it really mean to recontextualize "proactively"? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think B2C2B. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "sexy" really mean? A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point) be able to redefine fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough SVG. We will facilitate the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry buzzword "sexy". Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world CAE and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our infrastructures but our ability to recontextualize. Have you ever been unable to generate your feature set? Without having to learn Python? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be C2C2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think mega-extensible. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? A company that can generate courageously will (one day) be able to evolve fiercely. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough C++. We will add to our capacity to syndicate without depreciating our power to synthesize. Imagine a combination of PHP and C++. The capacity to engage perfectly leads to the aptitude to synergize super-compellingly. It may seem confusing, but it's accurate!