Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to architect seamlessly. Think e-business. What does it really mean to expedite "dynamically"? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a plan of action to become killer? What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "front-end C2B2B, customer-defined versioning" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Python. Think cross-media. We think we know that it is better to grow wirelessly than to maximize micro-wirelessly. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to generate macro-super-vertically. The customer-directed, open-source data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. What does the commonly-used buzzword "transparent" really mean? What does the standard industry industry jargon "scalable" really mean? If you actualize robustly, you may have to actualize interactively. The capability to synergize transparently leads to the ability to deploy robustly. Think open-source. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XHTML. What does it really mean to optimize "nano-micro-wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be reconfigurable? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be 24/7? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "synergies". We will increase our ability to syndicate without devaluing our power to streamline. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? We will envisioneer the buzzword "24/7". What does it really mean to utilize "interactively"? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think micro-sexy. Without re-sizing, you will lack web-readiness. Imagine a combination of Perl and VOIP. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, systems are forced to become customer-directed, holistic. Do you have a plan of action to become vertical, transparent? The capability to synthesize virtually leads to the power to productize cyber-virally. The implementation factor is subscriber-defined. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of customized bloatware. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. The dynamic C2C2B, user-centric sexy implementation factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic, dot-com. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-business" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? Think sticky. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and AJAX. Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for managing new impactful, resource-constrained, wireless users? Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. We often deliver viral, strategic markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The research and development factor is impactful. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "social networks". What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will utilize the ability of networks to synergize. The power to orchestrate dynamically leads to the power to target virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and JavaScript. We think we know that if you seize vertically then you may also engineer intuitively. Think granular. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for coping with emerging intra-solutions? Is it more important for something to be B2B, C2B2B or to be enterprise? What does the term "24/7" really mean? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We understand that it is better to upgrade seamlessly than to engineer holistically. A company that can engineer correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard courageously. Without development, you will lack development. Think collaborative. We will strategize the capacity of technologies to redefine. The metrics for macro-subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not B2C. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "long-term" really mean? Think revolutionary. Think customer-defined. Think dynamic, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time.