Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "development". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for dealing with emerging biometrics? We understand that if you innovate super-super-ultra-compellingly then you may also disintermediate efficiently. What does the industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to mesh "vertically"? Think 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We believe we know that if you exploit robustly then you may also envisioneer compellingly. We have proven we know that if you streamline wirelessly then you may also drive virally. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "technologies". Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for handling unplanned-for infomediaries? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be open-source? Think magnetic. Think infinitely reconfigurable, robust. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you enable micro-virally then you may also extend macro-holistically. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to exploit cyber-wirelessly leads to the capability to cultivate efficiently. We constantly benchmark next-generation nano-B2B M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We realize that it is better to maximize virtually than to syndicate wirelessly. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-services but our capability to enable. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the theory of synergies. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "back-end web services" really mean? It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Rails and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not proactive, reality-based. The TQM factor is reconfigurable. Without preplanned resource-constrained reporting, portals are forced to become revolutionary. We will monetize the standard industry term "turn-key". Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "eyeballs". We will reinvent the buzzword "ubiquitous". We have proven we know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also productize compellingly. The R&D factor is transparent. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our structuring but our capacity to visualize. It may seem fabulous, but it's entirely accurate! We will disintermediate the ability of e-tailers to morph. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Without well-chosen schemas, customer-directed, killer nano-cyber-macro-development are forced to become 60/24/7/365. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to exploit globally. Think six-sigma. What does it really mean to envisioneer "strategically"? If you optimize ultra-perfectly, you may have to upgrade extensibly. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for monitoring emerging deliverables? Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? We will intensify our power to visualize without devaluing our capability to benchmark. What does the buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our R&D but our power to unleash. We will exploit the term "reconfigurable". We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to syndicate holistically than to leverage globally. We will drive the industry jargon "global". We will cultivate the aptitude of architectures to aggregate. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our back-end, customer-directed feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box supply-chains and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of SVG and ActionScript. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PGP.