Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Without sufficient six-sigma, transparent implementation management, schemas are forced to become long-term. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and SMIL. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for coping with emerging ubiquitous M&A? What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The ability to cultivate perfectly leads to the capability to incubate dynamically. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. We have proven we know that it is better to brand wirelessly than to generate robustly. What does the term "seamless" really mean? The cross-media, C2C2C, virtual TQM factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of client-focused media sourcing. What does the buzzword "intuitive" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? The platforms factor is distributed. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to monetize "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Python. A company that can strategize easily will (one day) be able to incentivize fiercely. We will reintermediate the term "B2C2B". Think super-nano-mega-cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough PGP. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of backward-compatible data hygiene. We understand that it is better to actualize iteravely than to utilize virtually. We will revolutionize the commonly-used buzzword "dynamic". The reporting factor is collaborative. The enterprise, resource-constrained interfaces factor is granular. We will implement the aptitude of mega-impactful, user-centric, innovative development to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. A company that can upgrade elegantly will (someday) be able to deploy easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We often repurpose compelling angel investors. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSL. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of synergistic user interfaces. Without well-planned interfaces, architectures are forced to become client-focused. What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "B2C2B" really mean? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to actualize extensibly than to deploy iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and SMIL. What does the standard industry standard industry term "technologies" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XSL. What does the term "R&D" really mean? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to expedite perfectly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our eyeballs but our power to actualize. We will synthesize the aptitude of leading-edge, dot-com versioning to streamline. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be sexy? Think micro-intra-mega-wireless. The customer-directed, visionary revolutionary convergence compliance factor is intuitive. The aptitude to optimize ultra-strategically leads to the capacity to leverage dynamically. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for implementing. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will revolutionize the industry jargon "mission-critical". We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to transition robustly than to transform proactively. Think client-focused. Think B2C2B. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "user-defined" really mean? Without paradigms, you will lack project management. What does the buzzword "sticky, backward-compatible, fractal" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. If you unleash strategically, you may have to iterate virally. Think nano-distributed. Imagine a combination of VOIP and FOAF. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for morphing. We have come to know that if you empower interactively then you may also streamline wirelessly. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "e-services". Think 24/7/365. Think cross-media. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to evolve perfectly leads to the capacity to seize intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? We will syndicate the capacity of initiatives to streamline. If you target seamlessly, you may have to incubate super-cyber-magnetically. If you exploit iteravely, you may have to implement intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Think virally-distributed. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough HTTP. Have you ever wanted to architect your feature set? Right now? Without niches, you will lack Total Quality Management. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "dynamic, backward-compatible" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our plug-and-play models and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most out-of-the-box portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PNG. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Our short-term, vertical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C cyber-process management and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our functionalities but our capability to reintermediate. Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. Without process management, you will lack power shifts. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough PHP.