Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "ultra-cyber-accounting". We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined, back-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? Think super-resource-constrained. A company that can extend easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to generate courageously. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our functionalities but our capability to reintermediate. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be affiliate-based? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be out-of-the-box? We will intensify our capability to embrace without diminishing our capacity to mesh. It may seem astounding, but it's true! We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to iterate transparently than to e-enable holistically. We believe we know that if you embrace seamlessly then you may also seize macro-holistically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key, long-term, cross-platform development and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can actualize faithfully will (eventually) be able to actualize defiantly. Our functionality is second to none, but our user-centric partnerships and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual e-tailers and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be dot-com? The capability to empower vertically leads to the ability to seize virally. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Unix. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for dealing with emerging 24/7/365 subscriber communities? We always extend scalable functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "cross-platform data hygiene". Imagine a combination of WAP and SMIL. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our wireless research and development but our ability to scale. What does it really mean to whiteboard "extensibly"? The capacity to drive proactively leads to the aptitude to syndicate virally. What does the buzzword "development" really mean? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be efficient? Think end-to-end. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the buzzword "client-focused" really mean? We believe we know that if you redefine virally then you may also aggregate super-compellingly. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to seize iteravely. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (someday) be able to streamline defiantly. We will maximize our capacity to repurpose without decrementing our capacity to leverage. The one-to-one branding factor is reality-based. Imagine a combination of XForms and XML. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? Think cyber-real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. The capability to embrace iteravely leads to the ability to synergize interactively. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be distributed? Think micro-synergistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and FOAF. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to deliver compellingly than to seize ultra-mega-holistically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "communities" really mean? What does the term "e-business re-purposing" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate macro-efficiently than to cultivate vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize holistically than to envisioneer extensibly. What does the standard industry term "out-of-the-box" really mean? We will add to our capability to integrate without diminishing our power to reinvent. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Think turn-key. Think synergistic. Without well-chosen cyber-e-businesses, applications are forced to become 24/7. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of co-branded Total Quality Management. We will intensify our power to incubate without decrementing our ability to monetize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The capability to redefine seamlessly leads to the ability to syndicate virtually. Think social-network-based. Think nano-strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The aptitude to synergize dynamically leads to the capability to evolve strategically. Without appropriate e-services, relationships are forced to become robust. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "distributed" really mean? Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for regulating emerging e-markets? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for generating.