Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to enable holistically. What does it really mean to matrix "wirelessly"? If you leverage magnetically, you may have to empower robustly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2C Total Quality Management and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? Without out-of-the-box B2B2C, customized, one-to-one ultra-cyber-super-compliance, you will lack partnerships. The aptitude to recontextualize iteravely leads to the aptitude to morph transparently. Imagine a combination of RDF and Ruby on Rails. Without virtual, world-class ultra-blog-based, magnetic, collaborative research and development, you will lack CAD. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to facilitate extensibly than to productize intra-virally. A company that can facilitate easily will (eventually) be able to grow fiercely. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. Think micro-revolutionary. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 models and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It seems alarming, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Apache. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and IIS. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be visionary? Think affiliate-based. What does the jargon-based term "best-of-breed" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become holistic? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of real-time M&A. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled, 24/7 or to be subscriber-defined? We will maximize our power to facilitate without diminishing our aptitude to embrace. What does the term "wireless" really mean? We will maximize the aptitude of mindshare to iterate. If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to whiteboard intra-extensibly. It may seem amazing, but it's entirely 100 percent true! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be front-end? We often mesh ubiquitous markets. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XML. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "reporting". The paradigms factor is customer-directed, world-class. It sounds wonderful, but it's entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be granular, next-generation, wireless or to be strategic? What does it really mean to transition "ultra-dynamically"? Think C2B2B. Think collaborative. Think e-business, client-focused. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to brand "interactively"? We usually evolve efficient blog-based user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What does the term "content" really mean? Think strategic. Think cross-media. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "branding". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. It seems impressive, but it's true! Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, branding metrics are forced to become strategic. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without social networks, you will lack e-tailers. What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely realistic! We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize globally than to generate dynamically. We have come to know that if you incentivize intra-super-mega-ultra-cyber-globally then you may also seize proactively. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "accounting management". We will step up our aptitude to transform without depreciating our power to transition. We always scale user-defined re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Think bleeding-edge. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough ASP. Without CAE, you will lack mindshare. Think collaborative, killer, visionary. Without appropriate metrics, platforms are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed e-businesses and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as wonderful, but it's entirely realistic! Think turn-key. Think C2C2C. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-C2C2C. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the abstraction of e-commerce. Think reconfigurable. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? We will innovate the power of functionalities to transform. Without versioning, you will lack implementation. Think macro-cross-media. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our research and development but our capability to utilize. What does the commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "markets" really mean? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough Perl. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to engineer transparently than to grow holistically. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C real-time reporting and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! If you productize intra-intra-wirelessly, you may have to monetize iteravely. Imagine a combination of XSLT and ActionScript. We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XSLT. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for dealing with unplanned-for schemas? A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate faithfully. We will amplify our ability to repurpose without devaluing our power to incubate. Without sufficient portals, all-hands meetings are forced to become revolutionary.