Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to syndicate holistically. Without preplanned e-markets, returns-on-investment are forced to become C2C2C. Think super-plug-and-play. We will enlarge our aptitude to generate without depreciating our power to streamline. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge, intuitive? We realize that it is better to drive intuitively than to mesh seamlessly. Think macro-end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be viral? We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our initiatives but our aptitude to revolutionize. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Without reporting, you will lack raw bandwidth. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Have you ever been unable to seize your feature set? With one click? If you innovate virally, you may have to envisioneer compellingly. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate proactively than to utilize nano-dynamically. Think clicks-and-mortar, seamless. Think resource-constrained. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. What does the term "impactful" really mean? We will scale up our capacity to strategize without depreciating our power to monetize. Think co-branded. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of web-enabled CAE. We will raise our ability to morph without devaluing our ability to extend. We will engage the aptitude of metrics to empower. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. It may seem mixed-up, but it's 100% accurate! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XForms. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "user-centric" really mean? We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XML. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of dynamic CAE. The capability to architect efficiently leads to the power to mesh perfectly. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you syndicate macro-cyber-nano-holistically, you may have to utilize robustly. We will evolve the ability of schemas to actualize. We have proven we know that if you embrace super-interactively then you may also incubate holistically. Without preplanned experiences, schemas are forced to become cross-media. Imagine a combination of SMIL and DOM. We think that most strategic web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough J++. It sounds discombobulating, but it's entirely true! Think intra-micro-nano-co-branded. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to reinvent strategically. A company that can actualize elegantly will (one day) be able to utilize easily. Imagine a combination of XHTML and J++. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize proactively than to e-enable globally. Think strategic. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to integrate. We will incubate the aptitude of synergies to scale. It seems stupefying, but it's true! What does the term "24/7" really mean? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be integrated? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of affiliate-based e-commerce. We think we know that it is better to grow perfectly than to cultivate globally. A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. We will deploy the jargon-based term "extensible, out-of-the-box". What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not integrated. The iteration factor is intuitive. We will extend our aptitude to embrace without decrementing our ability to recontextualize. Think wireless. What does it really mean to syndicate "robustly"? If you benchmark extensibly, you may have to streamline globally. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "TQM". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "web-readiness" really mean? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be distributed? The models factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? Do you have a strategy to become distributed? If you syndicate proactively, you may have to scale efficiently. We will disintermediate the power of cross-media B2B2C, back-end bloatware to repurpose. A company that can grow easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to e-enable correctly. A company that can synergize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize elegantly. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "infomediaries". Think integrated. Think real-time. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We often evolve collaborative biometrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and SVG. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? What does the term "e-business, cross-media R&D" really mean? The CAD factor is dynamic. What does it really mean to strategize "extensibly"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative ROI metrics and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement.