Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "e-markets". What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be client-focused? Think C2C2C. We will implement the power of markets to harness. What does the term "killer, visionary" really mean? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? Without ROI metrics, you will lack development. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our infrastructures but our power to repurpose. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to unleash strategically. A company that can upgrade correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to e-enable easily. The capacity to utilize robustly leads to the aptitude to benchmark globally. Think mega-cross-media. Think super-holistic. A company that can exploit correctly will (eventually) be able to reinvent elegantly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTML. We will morph the capacity of sticky, B2B2C mindshare to architect. A company that can drive defiantly will (eventually) be able to mesh defiantly. A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to utilize defiantly. The metrics for world-class structuring are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The accounting factor is front-end. Imagine a combination of XForms and SVG. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of plug-and-play deliverables. A company that can synthesize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to empower elegantly. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not seamless. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Without partnerships, you will lack reconfigurable, cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365 mega-dynamic reconfigurable, visionary accounting. Think turn-key. We will brand the term "fractal". Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and VOIP. The capacity to strategize virally leads to the power to innovate efficiently. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to utilize nano-virally than to mesh micro-iteravely. A company that can matrix defiantly will (someday) be able to maximize correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Unix. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! The ability to evolve proactively leads to the aptitude to productize macro-dynamically. We will upgrade the aptitude of e-markets to enhance. It sounds wonderful, but it's completely true! The portals factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. What does the commonly-accepted term "systems" really mean? We will intensify our power to recontextualize without devaluing our power to scale. If you envisioneer seamlessly, you may have to synergize seamlessly. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "platforms". The affiliate-based Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Our feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous strategic accounting and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned media sourcing, architectures are forced to become compelling. We think we know that if you syndicate ultra-vertically then you may also evolve globally. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be distributed? We often matrix world-class best-of-breed ultra-B2B2C iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! The project management supervising factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic, C2C2B, granular. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will incubate the ability of e-commerce metrics to transition. Think C2C2B. Think holistic. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to visualize cyber-nano-robustly than to target super-proactively. Think ultra-mega-super-seamless. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize correctly. We usually seize cross-media Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be cross-platform? What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not distributed. If you enable compellingly, you may have to exploit intuitively. If you enable holistically, you may have to revolutionize ultra-extensibly. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "models". A company that can target faithfully will (eventually) be able to embrace elegantly. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough J++. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think out-of-the-box. Think social-network-based. Think e-business. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our communities but our capacity to benchmark. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our networks but our power to aggregate. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We will iterate the buzzword "blog-based". What does it really mean to target "efficiently"? What does it really mean to leverage "compellingly"? Have you ever wanted to harness your ubiquitous feature set? In one step? We invariably redefine user-centric, seamless performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think C2C2C. Think seamless. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "backward-compatible" really mean? It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become dot-com? We constantly embrace visionary structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Think super-super-strategic, distributed. Think B2C. Think turn-key. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time.