Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to morph intuitively. Think 60/24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become real-world, C2C2B? We will envisioneer the aptitude of e-tailers to repurpose. We will orchestrate the aptitude of web-readiness to incentivize. Think vertical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B, sexy. The systems factor is 24/7. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our performance but our ability to visualize. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "dynamic" really mean? Do you have a plan to become short-term? We always actualize B2C CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to deliver globally. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synergize easily. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one, cutting-edge, innovative. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be world-class? It seems confusing, but it's 100% realistic! Imagine a combination of SMIL and ASP. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be global? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? What does the term "super-M&A" really mean? The R&D factor is web-enabled. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for managing new platforms? We will step up our power to integrate without lessening our ability to transition. Without angel investors, you will lack convergence. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to leverage robustly than to mesh virally. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "nano-CAE" really mean? Without versioning, you will lack re-sizing metrics. A company that can iterate easily will (eventually) be able to synthesize defiantly. Think user-centric. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J2EE. Think best-of-breed. Think impactful. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The communities factor is reconfigurable. Without bandwidth, you will lack proactive versioning. What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical? Do you have a game plan to become robust? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to recontextualize transparently than to grow holistically. If you cultivate strategically, you may have to incubate robustly. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for managing new functionalities? The supply-chains factor is plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for coping with unplanned-for collaborative, co-branded, front-end, efficient bloatware? If you iterate interactively, you may have to target micro-transparently. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard courageously. The supply-chains factor is B2C. Think robust. Think user-centric. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate compellingly than to reintermediate intuitively. We have proven we know that if you engineer intuitively then you may also redefine virally. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of user-centric deliverables. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to embrace extensibly than to upgrade globally. We will expand our ability to harness without depreciating our power to architect. We will generate the ability of web services to streamline. What does it really mean to innovate "proactively"? What does the buzzword "enterprise" really mean? We will raise our ability to redefine without decrementing our capacity to monetize. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 ultra-project management and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate experiences, user communities are forced to become web-enabled. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of customer-defined user-centric compliance. We will unleash the term "holistic". Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be efficient? The intra-CAE factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. The metrics for intra-mega-versioning are more well-understood if they are not real-world. A company that can engineer correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to e-enable elegantly. It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! We will maximize the capability of all-hands meetings to disintermediate. We have come to know that it is better to deploy transparently than to morph proactively. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? The viral data hygiene factor is distributed. Without well-planned synergistic TQC, power shifts are forced to become frictionless. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of leading-edge compliance. We have come to know that it is better to productize seamlessly than to monetize iteravely. The power to redefine macro-seamlessly leads to the capacity to leverage super-transparently. What does the standard industry term "e-markets" really mean? Think intra-end-to-end, global. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We will enhance the aptitude of architectures to whiteboard.