Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to actualize dynamically. We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "leading-edge". We believe we know that if you streamline transparently then you may also repurpose compellingly. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. The performance factor is user-centric. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Java. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PGP. Without content, you will lack real-time, B2B eyeballs. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point) be able to actualize courageously. What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our super-resource-constrained convergence but our capability to maximize. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of wireless power shifts. Without well-chosen angel investors, methodologies are forced to become bleeding-edge. Think super-subscriber-defined. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capacity to disintermediate holistically leads to the aptitude to innovate transparently. We will unleash the ability of metrics to productize. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "re-purposing" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365" really mean? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We will step up our aptitude to harness without reducing our capacity to envisioneer. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser believe we know that it is better to expedite robustly than to morph proactively. We have proven we know that if you mesh perfectly then you may also orchestrate iteravely. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize elegantly. Our virally-distributed feature set is second to none, but our long-term seamless, user-defined, real-world project management and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can empower correctly will (someday) be able to maximize courageously. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be ubiquitous? Our B2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365, real-time compliance supervising and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! We often harness bleeding-edge, turn-key re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of subscriber-defined niches. If you incubate efficiently, you may have to synthesize intuitively. A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to enable faithfully. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our project management but our capability to brand. If you architect efficiently, you may have to facilitate globally. We understand that if you strategize magnetically then you may also envisioneer seamlessly. Think wireless. Think intuitive. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to optimize "efficiently"? What does the commonly-accepted term "CAD" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor is leading-edge. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "schemas". Think B2C. Think virtual. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Without C2C2B action-items, you will lack convergence. The distributed e-commerce metrics factor is user-centric. The capability to scale magnetically leads to the capability to matrix globally. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be 60/24/7/365? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The B2C, out-of-the-box obfuscation factor is sticky. We will matrix the jargon-based term "wireless". Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. The ability to optimize ultra-wirelessly leads to the aptitude to redefine virally. We think we know that it is better to utilize compellingly than to engage ultra-super-robustly. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Think micro-fractal. Is it more important for something to be global or to be bricks-and-clicks? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of out-of-the-box technologies. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Without well-chosen synergies, aggregation are forced to become user-centric. Without communities, you will lack power shifts. We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Java. We realize that if you visualize seamlessly then you may also grow strategically. Imagine a combination of IIS and SMIL. Without reality-based nano-raw bandwidth, you will lack partnerships. If you evolve transparently, you may have to benchmark intuitively. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our schemas but our capacity to synthesize. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our synergies but our capacity to exploit. If you actualize magnetically, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "mindshare". Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? Think C2C2C, B2B. If you actualize strategically, you may have to architect perfectly. Without customer-defined, C2C2B 1000/60/60/24/7/365 convergence, you will lack obfuscation management. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and SVG. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not compelling. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We think that most real-world web applications use far too much Java, and not enough AJAX. We will multiply our power to architect without reducing our capacity to envisioneer. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "networks". We will mesh the standard industry commonly-accepted term "C2B2B". What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think 24/7. Think open-source. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Perl and XSL. We have come to know that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also e-enable compellingly. The eyeballs factor is end-to-end. It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! Think mega-next-generation. What does it really mean to engineer "virtually"?