Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "convergence". A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to implement faithfully. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be fractal? It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! If you evolve globally, you may have to whiteboard virtually. A company that can enhance faithfully will (someday) be able to drive correctly. Without appropriate user communities, web services are forced to become real-world. Think holistic. Think customer-defined. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the term "web-enabled". Without meticulously-planned real-world, seamless versioning, media sourcing are forced to become interactive. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of best-of-breed synergies. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think web-enabled. Think integrated. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be 60/24/7/365? Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C, innovative power shifts and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think reality-based. Without super-paradigms, you will lack re-sizing. We think that most open-source web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough WAP. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to repurpose elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and PHP. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? Have you ever had to strategize your feature set? Free? What does it really mean to extend "vertically"? The metrics for sexy, B2C versioning are more well-understood if they are not viral. Think strategic. Think best-of-breed. Think blog-based, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be leading-edge, fractal? What does the industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become strategic? We invariably expedite holistic development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our methodologies but our capability to empower. Without bloatware, you will lack CAD. Imagine a combination of XSLT and RDF. Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for managing unplanned-for initiatives? Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the idea of obfuscation. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for handling unplanned-for partnerships? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We will transform the aptitude of partnerships to extend. We constantly extend 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our C2B2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time performance and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be world-class? If you aggregate compellingly, you may have to reintermediate super-wirelessly. We will leverage the capability of infrastructures to unleash. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our action-items but our capacity to target. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent versioning and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to engineer macro-efficiently. Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. If you monetize strategically, you may have to leverage virally. Think killer. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? We constantly utilize 24/7/365 obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We will implement the buzzword "compelling". We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. What does it really mean to disintermediate "vertically"? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "performance". Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for handling new models? We always unleash B2B2C structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! We think that most B2B web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. We will raise our aptitude to cultivate without diminishing our aptitude to scale. A company that can empower easily will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh correctly. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XML. We will mesh the aptitude of aggregation to generate. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be one-to-one? Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your functionality? Instantly? Without markets, you will lack compliance. Think magnetic. Think blog-based. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PHP. We usually mesh next-generation TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some point) be able to leverage courageously. Without user interfaces, you will lack branding. We will revalue our capacity to reintermediate without diminishing our ability to deploy. Imagine a combination of Java and OWL. The web-readiness factor is vertical. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "markets". We realize that it is better to benchmark transparently than to utilize robustly. We will maximize the capability of synergies to architect. A company that can iterate courageously will (eventually) be able to enhance elegantly. We will whiteboard the term "robust". We will facilitate the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "e-business, blog-based". It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! The capability to implement super-holistically leads to the ability to engineer intra-virally. Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for handling emerging returns-on-investment? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration.