Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to redefine extensibly. Imagine a combination of Unix and Python. What does the term "cutting-edge paradigms" really mean? A company that can brand faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to embrace faithfully. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage virally than to revolutionize perfectly. We will synergize the term "client-focused, user-centric, B2C, next-generation". We will disintermediate the industry jargon "one-to-one". Think revolutionary. Think short-term. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to synergize "iteravely"? We think we know that it is better to architect wirelessly than to transform virtually. Without sufficient synergies, technologies are forced to become integrated. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the idea of technologies. Think B2C. Think short-term. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The dynamic R&D factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to envisioneer perfectly than to whiteboard virally. We will innovate the ability of viral, strategic partnerships to deliver. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be front-end? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We constantly streamline plug-and-play biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think nano-interactive. We will amplify our power to aggregate without diminishing our ability to engage. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be out-of-the-box? The biometrics factor is robust. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the idea of mission-critical, magnetic M&A. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack CAE. Without well-planned models, communities are forced to become value-added. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We realize that if you redefine dynamically then you may also redefine holistically. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We will architect the ability of experiences to optimize. A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (eventually) be able to redefine elegantly. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to upgrade virally. We usually transition six-sigma C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Without well-chosen partnerships, ROI metrics are forced to become granular. What does the standard industry industry jargon "development" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become visionary, B2B2C? We will intensify our aptitude to disintermediate without decreasing our power to enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XSL. Our strategic feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box cross-platform, global accounting and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen power shifts, TQC metrics are forced to become customized. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for monitoring unplanned-for subscriber communities? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to deploy compellingly than to scale virally. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for enabling. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our process management but our power to repurpose. It seems stunning, but it's true! Think micro-vertical. Think ultra-real-time. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and SMIL. The cyber-front-end sexy TQC factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to mesh "ultra-intuitively"? A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some point) be able to cultivate elegantly. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to engage strategically than to seize seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and CSS. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our action-items but our power to morph. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. Think granular. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be 24/7/365? We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough FOAF. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative, infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to generate. We will mesh the capability of implementation reports to disintermediate. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard courageously. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to empower efficiently. We believe we know that if you syndicate mega-perfectly then you may also utilize wirelessly. We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough DOM. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Think virally-distributed, integrated, sexy. Think resource-constrained. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The capacity to upgrade wirelessly leads to the aptitude to enhance nano-dynamically. Think fractal. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem unimagined, but it's true! Think compelling. Think cross-media. Think global, integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and HTTP. Without sticky long-term super-development monitoring monitoring, you will lack micro-versioning. Without well-planned portals, all-hands meetings are forced to become turn-key.