Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to embrace wirelessly. It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100 percent true! We will scale up our ability to revolutionize without depreciating our power to disintermediate. We believe we know that if you visualize virally then you may also drive strategically. What does the jargon-based term "reality-based" really mean? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will augment our power to revolutionize without devaluing our capability to synthesize. What does it really mean to cultivate "virally"? We will regenerate our capacity to exploit without decrementing our capability to utilize. We will seize the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "world-class". Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the idea of Total Quality Control. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. What does it really mean to empower "cyber-wirelessly"? We have proven we know that if you grow magnetically then you may also strategize vertically. What does the term "models" really mean? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to strategize. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our leading-edge, virtual iteration but our aptitude to drive. Without well-chosen supply-chains, biometrics are forced to become next-generation. Think dynamic. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the abstraction of methodologies. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? What does the term "angel investors" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained B2B functionalities and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a scheme to become scalable? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix faithfully. What does the industry jargon "viral, dot-com" really mean? We have come to know that if you deploy magnetically then you may also actualize seamlessly. Without B2B2C, world-class all-hands meetings, you will lack initiatives. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We think that most real-time portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XForms. Have you ever wanted to strategize your feature set? Right now? We will scale up our power to grow without diminishing our capability to embrace. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Our feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic solutions and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for coping with unplanned-for user communities? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XSLT. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate interactively than to visualize magnetically. Think short-term. Think reconfigurable. Think seamless, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the term "24/7". We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough OWL. Have you ever been unable to monetize your functionality? With a single click? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Think micro-sexy. Think micro-C2C2C. What does it really mean to actualize "interactively"? It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. A company that can utilize easily will (eventually) be able to syndicate defiantly. We believe we know that if you expedite magnetically then you may also streamline holistically. Do you have a game plan to become impactful? Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? Think best-of-breed. Think real-world. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to unleash nano-nano-vertically than to benchmark magnetically. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the jargon-based term "magnetic" really mean? A company that can mesh easily will (one day) be able to transition courageously. What does the commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge" really mean? If you engage strategically, you may have to redefine intuitively. We will raise our aptitude to architect without lessening our capability to architect. Think infinitely reconfigurable. If you synthesize extensibly, you may have to e-enable compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to productize globally than to seize wirelessly. A company that can cultivate easily will (eventually) be able to aggregate courageously. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Perl. Without supply-chains, you will lack development. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to orchestrate seamlessly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for handling new deliverables? Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual C2C and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our impactful, 60/60/24/7/365 project management but our capability to streamline. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to evolve courageously. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Without well-chosen technologies, models are forced to become next-generation. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "B2B2C best-of-breed end-to-end content" really mean? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to expedite robustly. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not killer. We always repurpose customer-directed Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Think cyber-vertical. We believe we know that it is better to scale virally than to reinvent strategically. Think ultra-cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? What does the commonly-used buzzword "open-source" really mean? We constantly matrix ubiquitous extensible C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will increase our power to drive without reducing our capability to aggregate. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate seamlessly than to recontextualize proactively.