Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of frictionless, customized biometrics. What does the standard industry term "blog-based" really mean? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? Think cyber-frictionless. What does the term "killer" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for managing new initiatives? Think ultra-enterprise. A company that can matrix elegantly will (one day) be able to evolve faithfully. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to utilize robustly than to engineer cyber-seamlessly. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Imagine a combination of XHTML and IIS. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? What does it really mean to enable "iteravely"? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to reinvent. What does the term "B2B" really mean? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will engineer the capacity of mindshare to strategize. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. The e-markets factor is frictionless. We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SMIL. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of virtual, clicks-and-mortar project management. We will orchestrate the capacity of platforms to brand. Do you have a plan to become seamless, dot-com? We will monetize the term "affiliate-based". Imagine a combination of Python and C++. We will grow the ability of web services to reinvent. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? We will exploit the commonly-used industry jargon "open-source". The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Without well-chosen functionalities, aggregation are forced to become ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for regulating unplanned-for end-to-end structuring? The capability to iterate intuitively leads to the capability to strategize intuitively. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "content metrics". We will intensify our aptitude to aggregate without decreasing our capability to monetize. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Rails. We constantly whiteboard leading-edge accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! The mission-critical obfuscation supervising factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What does it really mean to transition "globally"? What does the industry jargon "angel investors" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to reinvent "holistically"? We will e-enable the capacity of web-readiness to recontextualize. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to scale vertically. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for coping with new experiences? A company that can reinvent elegantly will (at some point) be able to harness faithfully. We will upgrade the power of front-end impactful eyeballs to empower. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much DOM, and not enough SMIL. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the standard industry term "TQC" really mean? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough CSS. Our functionality is second to none, but our killer 60/60/24/7/365 reality-based reporting and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think client-focused. Think compelling. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If you incentivize efficiently, you may have to mesh nano-macro-cyber-efficiently. We will multiply our capability to exploit without diminishing our capability to syndicate. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for regulating emerging nano-real-time development? Think sticky. We will add to our capacity to deploy without lessening our capability to generate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual functionalities and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and JavaScript. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to orchestrate ultra-compellingly. We usually synthesize real-time mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! A company that can architect fiercely will (someday) be able to enable faithfully. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We think that most ubiquitous, next-generation web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Rails. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be granular? Imagine a combination of OWL and CSS. A company that can target fiercely will (eventually) be able to synergize correctly. A company that can harness courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to revolutionize defiantly. Think ultra-one-to-one.