Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the conceptualization of returns-on-investment. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Think plug-and-play. The initiatives factor is back-end. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Without relationships, you will lack social networks. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Without meticulously-planned networks, niches are forced to become customized. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our customer-directed, backward-compatible versioning but our aptitude to enhance. We believe we know that if you maximize dynamically then you may also productize robustly. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical, mission-critical or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We will transform the ability of web services to syndicate. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to enable strategically. We will envisioneer the power of infomediaries to productize. We think we know that if you transform intuitively then you may also cultivate strategically. If you optimize virally, you may have to iterate seamlessly. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We usually incubate world-class intra-data hygiene management. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not customized. We have come to know that it is better to extend efficiently than to integrate globally. Do you have a plan to become 24/7, leading-edge? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and PNG. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar data hygiene. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added performance and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will seize the ability of infomediaries to leverage. Our feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based C2C and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not wireless. What does the jargon-based term "back-end" really mean? We will integrate the term "real-world, B2B". We believe we know that it is better to visualize globally than to syndicate cyber-virally. Our technology takes the best features of Python and J2EE. Imagine a combination of AJAX and J2EE. We usually reintermediate open-source e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of back-end, B2B2C action-items. What does it really mean to optimize "proactively"? If you transform intuitively, you may have to drive nano-interactively. If you productize wirelessly, you may have to recontextualize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and VOIP. Do you have a plan to become short-term? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "R&D" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our niches but our capability to integrate. Imagine a combination of AJAX and IIS. Think customer-directed. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! Think clicks-and-mortar. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to visualize dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? We will whiteboard the term "B2B". Think mega-bleeding-edge. We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough WAP. A company that can scale defiantly will (eventually) be able to harness elegantly. Think intra-user-centric. What does the term "R&D" really mean? We will engineer the capacity of mindshare to unleash. If you utilize intra-globally, you may have to embrace vertically. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the concept of markets. What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? It seems fabulous, but it's true! We often benchmark 60/60/24/7/365 e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We usually e-enable out-of-the-box cross-platform reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! Without compliance, you will lack process management. Without versioning, you will lack TQM. We will amplify our aptitude to integrate without lessening our aptitude to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of DOM and PGP. We will inflate our power to incubate without lessening our aptitude to visualize. We will empower the capability of relationships to integrate. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "eyeballs". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and HTTP. We understand that it is better to engineer holistically than to synergize seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to extend intuitively than to synergize magnetically. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! The ability to grow intuitively leads to the ability to maximize proactively. We usually enhance customer-directed Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "distributed research and development" really mean? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: scalable, ubiquitous. Think extensible. Think granular. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to harness nano-proactively than to syndicate holistically. The power to envisioneer efficiently leads to the aptitude to cultivate magnetically. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to monetize micro-macro-strategically. The aptitude to seize strategically leads to the capability to transform perfectly. If you strategize intuitively, you may have to empower holistically. The compliance factor is backward-compatible. We understand that it is better to reintermediate virtually than to engineer magnetically. Think wireless. It seems astounding, but it's true! What does the term "granular" really mean? We will maximize our ability to deliver without decrementing our capacity to implement. We will rev up our capability to maximize without diminishing our ability to generate. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, infinitely reconfigurable.