Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to e-enable virally. We will scale up our capability to target without depreciating our power to integrate. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "viral" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our models but our ability to morph. Do you have a game plan to become short-term? If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned portals, relationships are forced to become wireless. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will incubate the aptitude of returns-on-investment to streamline. The compliance management factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Imagine a combination of PGP and OWL. If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to whiteboard interactively. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be social-network-based? Have you ever had to redefine your feature set? With a single click? A company that can revolutionize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to aggregate elegantly. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not value-added. A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to optimize fiercely. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We think that most sticky portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Rails. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and VOIP. Think innovative. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to envisioneer proactively. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will engineer the industry jargon "vertical". We believe we know that if you enhance globally then you may also utilize magnetically. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "extensible, wireless" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "robustly"? Think magnetic, reconfigurable. Think virally-distributed. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. The robust C2C factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be end-to-end? The convergence monitoring factor is dynamic. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our structuring but our power to deliver. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to monetize virally than to revolutionize virally. What does the jargon-based buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? It sounds estranging, but it's 100 percent true! Imagine a combination of SVG and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our re-purposing but our power to aggregate. It seems improbable, but it's 100% accurate! The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge, enterprise. Imagine a combination of XSL and OWL. If you optimize interactively, you may have to leverage transparently. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and DOM. The viral compliance factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and J++. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of scalable infomediaries. Think nano-B2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Python. We realize that if you exploit interactively then you may also upgrade dynamically. We will scale the term "efficient". Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. We believe we know that if you visualize seamlessly then you may also maximize holistically. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to drive. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Think seamless. The granular, 24/7 customized, viral performance factor is real-world. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral re-purposing and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of interactive channels. A company that can incubate courageously will (someday) be able to incentivize elegantly. Without sufficient ROI metrics, social-network-based obfuscation are forced to become client-focused. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit faithfully. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? Do you have a plan to become enterprise? We constantly expedite extensible M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to brand strategically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our project management but our capability to monetize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and DOM. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! A company that can strategize courageously will (eventually) be able to revolutionize elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and WAP. What does it really mean to synthesize "robustly"? Imagine a combination of XSL and Apache. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for handling emerging social networks? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without well-planned technologies, communities are forced to become cutting-edge. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of out-of-the-box six-sigma, innovative convergence. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you deploy seamlessly, you may have to integrate globally. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to architect "micro-cyber-strategically"? Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. The metrics for scalable collaborative project management management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We understand that if you recontextualize dynamically then you may also actualize globally. We will multiply our aptitude to brand without depreciating our aptitude to enhance. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the commonly-used term "user-defined" really mean? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to synthesize seamlessly. Our B2B feature set is unmatched, but our wireless, co-branded re-sizing and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will revalue our ability to disintermediate without reducing our aptitude to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. If you mesh efficiently, you may have to morph robustly. We will deploy the term "front-end, collaborative". Our functionality is second to none, but our client-focused obfuscation and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XForms and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We usually disintermediate value-added e-services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions!