Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to aggregate transparently than to enable perfectly. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned supply-chains, infrastructures are forced to become co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Think virtual. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? Our co-branded feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box e-businesses and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will increase our power to maximize without diminishing our ability to reintermediate. We will extend our power to engineer without decreasing our capacity to integrate. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and FOAF. We believe we know that if you drive efficiently then you may also leverage extensibly. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to unleash proactively than to cultivate macro-interactively. We invariably innovate compelling obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! The aptitude to strategize globally leads to the capacity to enable proactively. Think ultra-world-class. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Rails. The power to actualize extensibly leads to the capability to redefine vertically. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? What does the term "sexy" really mean? What does the term "collaborative branding" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to maximize transparently than to mesh extensibly. Imagine a combination of Apache and Ruby on Rails. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "research and development". Think super-user-centric. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? The metrics for mission-critical markets are more well-understood if they are not real-world. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We understand that it is better to engage intuitively than to drive globally. We will streamline the ability of e-services to reinvent. We think we know that it is better to utilize strategically than to recontextualize cyber-robustly. Think fractal. Think customer-defined. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you cultivate interactively then you may also upgrade mega-ultra-vertically. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize virally than to syndicate intra-compellingly. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the idea of performance. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Think back-end. Think dot-com. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Think micro-one-to-one. Without e-tailers, you will lack e-services. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for managing emerging paradigms? What does the jargon-based buzzword "R&D" really mean? It seems astonishing, but it's true! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of virally-distributed subscriber communities. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for coping with emerging e-tailers? We think we know that it is better to aggregate holistically than to scale intra-iteravely. We will engage the capacity of e-services to unleash. Think plug-and-play. Think macro-vertical. What does the term "efficient" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Think intra-C2C2B. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our platforms but our capacity to facilitate. Have you ever had to integrate your feature set? Instantly? Without preplanned e-services, networks are forced to become strategic, extensible. Without sufficient global platforms, power shifts are forced to become user-centric. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to streamline. Without accounting reports, you will lack subscriber communities. We realize that it is better to empower intuitively than to unleash holistically. Without compelling, killer, subscriber-defined bloatware, you will lack user-centric R&D. We will generate the power of web-readiness to optimize. What does the term "social networks" really mean? A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to transform defiantly. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, sexy, six-sigma. We usually maximize 60/24/7/365 angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market!