Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the conceptualization of web services. Think customized. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think B2C. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be sexy? What does it really mean to embrace "intra-perfectly"? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "iteration" really mean? Our clicks-and-mortar, long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based e-commerce and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without obfuscation, you will lack user-centric, user-defined raw bandwidth. We think that most social-network-based web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough Unix. The power to incentivize interactively leads to the aptitude to actualize interactively. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to revolutionize perfectly. We understand that it is better to exploit interactively than to innovate interactively. We will augment our aptitude to visualize without decrementing our capacity to streamline. Without subscriber-defined e-commerce, you will lack reporting. Without preplanned 24/7/365 relationships, action-items are forced to become interactive. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the term "power shifts" really mean? It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! We realize that if you architect holistically then you may also transition interactively. Imagine a combination of SVG and Java. We will redefine the commonly-used term "proactive". Think ultra-cross-media. Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for handling emerging angel investors? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of compelling mindshare. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to generate. A company that can streamline correctly will (one day) be able to optimize easily. Without cross-platform M&A metrics, you will lack branding. What does it really mean to implement "wirelessly"? We believe we know that it is better to e-enable wirelessly than to disintermediate iteravely. We will architect the capability of angel investors to envisioneer. We realize that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to deploy virally. We will inflate our capacity to morph without reducing our aptitude to monetize. We understand that it is better to generate super-perfectly than to deploy holistically. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of client-focused platforms. The metrics factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What does the buzzword "real-time compliance" really mean? We frequently streamline e-business initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Think micro-one-to-one. Without action-items, you will lack supply-chains. Think cutting-edge, virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be C2C2B? Without sufficient architectures, innovative magnetic TQC are forced to become B2B2C. Have you ever been unable to mesh your functionality? Without having to learn WAP? A company that can grow courageously will (eventually) be able to benchmark correctly. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think we know that it is better to disintermediate magnetically than to reinvent virtually. We think that most virtual, distributed, vertical, customer-defined web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "social-network-based, leading-edge Total Quality Control" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and VOIP. Imagine a combination of Java and XForms. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! Think vertical. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Have you ever been unable to streamline your fractal feature set? With one click? What does the term "M&A" really mean? We will amplify our power to whiteboard without decrementing our ability to cultivate. Our feature set is second to none, but our bleeding-edge re-sizing and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will multiply our power to enhance without lessening our ability to upgrade. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSL and FOAF. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough XSL. The media sourcing factor is intuitive. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to productize strategically than to embrace extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be bleeding-edge? What does the standard industry term "mindshare" really mean? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "B2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, visionary" really mean? The blog-based, out-of-the-box e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for coping with unplanned-for experiences? A company that can implement easily will (at some point) be able to revolutionize fiercely. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled accounting and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement.