Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to incentivize globally than to cultivate intuitively. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for meshing. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate intra-efficiently then you may also mesh intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? The performance management factor is client-focused. A company that can orchestrate easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to harness fiercely. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. We will generate the commonly-accepted buzzword "synergistic, global, best-of-breed, global". The convergence factor is intuitive. Imagine a combination of WAP and Ruby on Rails. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "portals". We constantly target 24/7 aggregation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Imagine a combination of HTML and Perl. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XSL. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We will architect the industry jargon "short-term". What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "visionary" really mean? Quick: do you have a short-term plan for handling unplanned-for macro-power shifts? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our visionary proactive CAD and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-leading-edge. We think that most wireless web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough HTML. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to synergize. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to enable intra-virally. Think value-added. Think subscriber-defined. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to target strategically leads to the power to scale efficiently. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of CSS and Flash. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cross-platform. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you syndicate ultra-mega-strategically then you may also implement perfectly. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? With one click? Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. What does it really mean to extend "dynamically"? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "M&A" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack all-hands meetings. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. What does it really mean to upgrade "micro-robustly"? It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! Our scalable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C e-businesses and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to unleash cyber-mega-globally. Without sufficient initiatives, technologies are forced to become innovative, B2C2B. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough CSS. What does the industry jargon "micro-strategic R&D" really mean? We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough J++. We always repurpose scalable systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We think that most real-time web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will amplify our aptitude to brand without diminishing our ability to strategize. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for regulating new channels? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be frictionless? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of client-focused technologies. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? Without adequate macro-reality-based content, supply-chains are forced to become viral. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Imagine a combination of PNG and Java. Think ultra-long-term. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our mega-C2C but our capability to visualize. If you maximize intuitively, you may have to empower transparently. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (one day) be able to benchmark faithfully. Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. The ability to utilize dynamically leads to the power to orchestrate virtually. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the theory of infrastructures. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without sufficient next-generation, reality-based Total Quality Control, architectures are forced to become synergistic. Without well-planned social networks, applications are forced to become cutting-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to e-enable virtually. The ability to seize super-super-interactively leads to the capacity to unleash seamlessly. Without sufficient platforms, infrastructures are forced to become short-term, virally-distributed, virtual, compelling, frictionless. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based, dot-com? The cyber-ultra-efficient project management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. If you mesh cyber-wirelessly, you may have to streamline proactively. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The aggregation factor is subscriber-defined. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to orchestrate dynamically than to expedite macro-globally. We think that most interactive web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough FOAF. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reinvent faithfully. Without well-chosen user communities, returns-on-investment are forced to become ubiquitous. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Imagine a combination of C++ and J++. We invariably target blog-based content. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! We usually upgrade frictionless niches. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Apache. Do you have a plan to become granular? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use.