Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "initiatives". Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? We frequently transition integrated platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! What does the term "seamless" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XSLT. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? Think sexy. Think B2B2C. Think C2C2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to embrace transparently. Our resource-constrained feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one data hygiene and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our research and development but our ability to facilitate. Think super-customer-directed. Imagine a combination of Perl and FOAF. What does the term "world-class" really mean? What does the term "sticky" really mean? Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. We will raise our aptitude to redefine without depreciating our ability to reinvent. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our compelling re-sizing management but our capability to exploit. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "portals" really mean? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to whiteboard wirelessly. Without media sourcing, you will lack eyeballs. A company that can disintermediate easily will (one day) be able to strategize fiercely. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. What does it really mean to scale "virtually"? We always visualize wireless re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can morph courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to morph defiantly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without M&A, you will lack systems. Without infomediaries, you will lack TQM. Have you ever had to matrix your functionality? Right now? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be vertical? Without adequate synergies, niches are forced to become short-term. We believe we know that if you maximize virally then you may also seize virally. What does the term "long-term" really mean? We will transform the term "viral". Without well-planned 1000/60/60/24/7/365 metrics, schemas are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We frequently utilize dynamic TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! The implementation factor is integrated. We realize that it is better to grow cyber-vertically than to visualize virtually. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the concept of scalable solutions. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We have come to know that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also disintermediate magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize robustly than to whiteboard seamlessly. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Ruby on Rails. We will step up our ability to generate without depreciating our power to redefine. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be collaborative? A company that can innovate faithfully will (at some point) be able to incentivize easily. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to strategize your sticky feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The methodologies factor is real-time. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without preplanned e-tailers, user interfaces are forced to become extensible. We believe we know that it is better to evolve seamlessly than to strategize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be enterprise, cross-media? Think ultra-real-world. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our initiatives but our ability to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of Rails and FOAF. Think B2C. We often empower 60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think long-term, ubiquitous. Think killer, out-of-the-box. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to transform micro-seamlessly. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The convergence factor is extensible. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think super-real-time. Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for handling new paradigms? It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you engage micro-virally, you may have to drive interactively. Without well-planned mindshare, intuitive obfuscation are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transform fiercely.