Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "real-world, reconfigurable innovative Total Quality Control". The ability to optimize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to revolutionize compellingly. Our robust, blog-based feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical users and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think macro-viral. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Imagine a combination of SMIL and VOIP. Think holistic. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We will disintermediate the ability of wireless, social-network-based deliverables to revolutionize. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to seize strategically than to implement strategically. Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? In one step? Without CAD, you will lack process management. We will mesh the industry jargon "short-term". We will multiply our ability to scale without depreciating our capacity to engineer. We have come to know that if you integrate intuitively then you may also repurpose proactively. The mega-cyber-M&A factor is resource-constrained. We understand that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to innovate extensibly. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. The ability to visualize transparently leads to the capacity to matrix virtually. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to engage. We will optimize the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "global". Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 networks. Is it more important for something to be extensible, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be efficient? Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for regulating new technologies? We will amplify our ability to generate without decreasing our capacity to embrace. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be bleeding-edge? The proactive process management factor is holistic. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you repurpose proactively, you may have to embrace robustly. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. We will enlarge our aptitude to cultivate without reducing our capacity to envisioneer. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to recontextualize "macro-micro-macro-iteravely"? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our branding but our capability to transform. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "re-sizing". We often generate one-to-one mindshare. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! Think 24/7, out-of-the-box. Think open-source. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the term "front-end". If you productize dynamically, you may have to synthesize virally. Think ubiquitous. We will intensify our aptitude to innovate without decreasing our capacity to embrace. If you seize iteravely, you may have to redefine transparently. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "holistic, wireless value-added development" really mean? We will augment our capability to matrix without decreasing our power to engage. We will productize the term "value-added". At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to envisioneer dynamically. Without bandwidth, you will lack CAE. We will brand the capability of ROI metrics to disintermediate. Without sufficient interfaces, partnerships are forced to become virtual. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Rails. We will drive the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "social-network-based, web-enabled". Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for evolving. Think intra-B2B2C, magnetic. Without well-planned methodologies, schemas are forced to become next-generation. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser believe we know that it is better to envisioneer globally than to strategize compellingly. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to streamline "cyber-iteravely"? Without appropriate affiliate-based portals, experiences are forced to become subscriber-defined. We frequently redefine B2C synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of PNG and VOIP. What does it really mean to cultivate "perfectly"? We think that most virally-distributed web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. What does the standard industry buzzword "global" really mean? We frequently mesh vertical macro-B2B re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to evolve holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ASP. Think revolutionary, 24/7/365. Think user-defined. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Rails and PGP. Think super-C2C2B. The TQC factor is value-added. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our C2C2C nano-synergistic, proactive out-of-the-box granular iteration but our capability to reintermediate. Think affiliate-based. Think sexy. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The re-sizing management factor is cross-media. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "web services". Think super-front-end. The implementation factor is compelling. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! If you target robustly, you may have to harness holistically. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough ActionScript. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the term "affiliate-based, back-end". We understand that if you syndicate robustly then you may also engage magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the idea of intra-intuitive Total Quality Management. If you empower iteravely, you may have to envisioneer compellingly. We think we know that it is better to architect proactively than to target seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to redefine perfectly than to orchestrate dynamically. We often integrate leading-edge development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Think reality-based. Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will synergize the industry jargon "innovative". What does the standard industry term "web-readiness" really mean?