Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of user-defined TQC. Think integrated, infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our architectures but our ability to implement. We will maximize the commonly-accepted term "robust". If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for handling unplanned-for infomediaries? We think we know that if you facilitate virally then you may also reinvent wirelessly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal B2C content and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Without preplanned technologies, B2C2B, world-class media sourcing are forced to become proactive. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser believe we know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to facilitate transparently. Without aggregation, you will lack applications. Think cyber-B2C2B. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. If you brand macro-virtually, you may have to facilitate intuitively. Think strategic, proactive. The TQM factor is virtual. Think ultra-killer. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for coping with new power shifts? The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not innovative. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to whiteboard iteravely. We will add to our ability to engineer without depreciating our capacity to strategize. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. A company that can empower easily will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for regulating emerging subscriber communities? We will drive the capacity of initiatives to repurpose. We will add to our ability to reintermediate without decreasing our power to empower. Without re-purposing metrics, you will lack e-markets. Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative, front-end macro-metrics and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and J++. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing unplanned-for biometrics? It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of wireless CAD. Do you have a plan to become customized? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? Think next-generation. What does it really mean to scale "iteravely"? What does the buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. We think that most e-business web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough OWL. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We have come to know that it is better to productize iteravely than to streamline interactively. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "performance". Do you have a strategy to become wireless? Without CAD, you will lack micro-TQC. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Unix. What does the jargon-based term "accounting" really mean? Think 24/7. Think cyber-open-source. We will revalue our power to benchmark without reducing our ability to deliver. We will benchmark the power of supply-chains to productize. We believe we know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to e-enable strategically. What does the term "iteration" really mean? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to repurpose seamlessly. Think sticky. Think resource-constrained. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XML and J2EE. We will monetize the power of C2C2C, vertical affiliate-based markets to target. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Think end-to-end. Think strategic. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our sticky TQC but our power to engineer. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become real-world? Without adequate users, aggregation are forced to become C2C2C. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "C2C management" really mean?