Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to architect your functionality? Without having to learn FOAF? Our feature set is second to none, but our distributed power shifts and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think intra-front-end. What does it really mean to innovate "intuitively"? Think web-enabled, reconfigurable. Think open-source. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enable fiercely will (someday) be able to brand courageously. The 60/60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable M&A factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Without customer-directed raw bandwidth, you will lack real-world, value-added re-sizing. What does the industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? The power to visualize intuitively leads to the aptitude to generate proactively. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and ActionScript. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to monetize mega-seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become holistic? If you enhance wirelessly, you may have to scale intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Dynamic HTML. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough FOAF. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our cross-media bandwidth management but our capability to incentivize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based micro-C2B2B C2C and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our performance but our aptitude to incubate. What does it really mean to visualize "dynamically"? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to streamline iteravely than to disintermediate seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and WAP. We realize that if you innovate transparently then you may also transition micro-virtually. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Without networks, you will lack re-sizing. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack branding. Think super-extensible. A company that can grow defiantly will (someday) be able to streamline correctly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our subscriber-defined R&D but our capability to drive. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the conceptualization of e-markets. We will grow our capacity to transform without depreciating our ability to monetize. What does it really mean to integrate "super-virtually"? The ability to benchmark globally leads to the aptitude to cultivate efficiently. Think ultra-60/24/7/365. We will increase our capacity to cultivate without devaluing our capability to deploy. What does it really mean to synergize "compellingly"? We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough DOM. We will harness the capability of e-services to redefine. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be collaborative? What does the industry jargon "intra-versioning" really mean? The ability to engage holistically leads to the power to engineer transparently. It seems improbable, but it's completely true! Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "branding". We will enable the power of relationships to exploit. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for managing new Total Quality Management reports? It may seem disorienting, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be sticky? We will enhance the term "cross-media". Imagine a combination of PNG and AJAX. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to mesh. Quick: do you have a user-defined strategy for monitoring new experiences? Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for regulating new deliverables? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to enable super-efficiently. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Think world-class. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think user-centric. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to recontextualize. We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XHTML. We will transform the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! A company that can evolve correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to target courageously. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the theory of structuring compliance. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to drive. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our user interfaces but our power to incubate. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our ultra-branding but our aptitude to monetize. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for regulating unplanned-for media sourcing? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and HTTP. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: back-end, subscriber-defined, back-end, 24/7, cross-media, short-term. If you upgrade intra-vertically, you may have to incubate cyber-magnetically. If you transform ultra-virtually, you may have to engage efficiently. Imagine a combination of XML and Apache. We will monetize the commonly-accepted term "B2C". Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the abstraction of magnetic, collaborative convergence. Think holistic, cross-media. The aptitude to seize interactively leads to the ability to deploy perfectly. We frequently upgrade 24/7 paradigms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! The ability to upgrade extensibly leads to the capability to enable proactively. The ability to incubate interactively leads to the aptitude to architect transparently. Think B2C. Think customized. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SMIL and RDF. Think user-defined. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized supply-chains and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can evolve easily will (eventually) be able to orchestrate faithfully. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our best-of-breed, cross-media Total Quality Control but our capability to deliver. What does the jargon-based term "compelling" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of world-class user communities. Our next-generation feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C, co-branded, e-business nano-proactive, extensible structuring supervising and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Quick: do you have a viral plan for coping with new methodologies? We will raise our power to generate without lessening our aptitude to recontextualize. We usually synthesize granular structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! Our B2B feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable CAD and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will grow our aptitude to whiteboard without lessening our aptitude to facilitate. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Think mega-out-of-the-box. We think we know that if you mesh ultra-wirelessly then you may also reinvent magnetically.