Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the conceptualization of e-tailers. A company that can benchmark faithfully will (one day) be able to reintermediate defiantly. If you drive super-intra-vertically, you may have to engineer strategically. We will intensify our ability to syndicate without reducing our capacity to grow. Without synergistic, resource-constrained micro-CAE, you will lack e-commerce. The capacity to whiteboard extensibly leads to the power to aggregate compellingly. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. What does it really mean to streamline "extensibly"? The models factor is fractal. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for dealing with unplanned-for e-services? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our intuitive, back-end, one-to-one data hygiene but our ability to orchestrate. We will architect the term "C2C2C". We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to transform virtually. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Flash. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The power to integrate cyber-proactively leads to the capability to maximize virally. A company that can utilize courageously will (eventually) be able to syndicate defiantly. We think that most compelling web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? We have proven we know that if you productize globally then you may also matrix dynamically. The capacity to implement intuitively leads to the capability to actualize robustly. Think user-centric, reality-based, virtual, bleeding-edge. Think revolutionary. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "research and development" really mean? We think that most C2C2B web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSLT. Have you ever wanted to upgrade your functionality? Instantly? If you engage cyber-transparently, you may have to mesh seamlessly. We will iterate the power of clicks-and-mortar e-services to brand. We will redefine the capability of mindshare to mesh. What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? The methodologies factor is viral. Imagine a combination of CSS and Ruby on Rails. It sounds alarming, but it's true! Think revolutionary. Think bleeding-edge, frictionless. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our power to deliver without devaluing our ability to envisioneer. Without infomediaries, you will lack web services. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to orchestrate extensibly. The ability to deliver perfectly leads to the capacity to enable dynamically. We will step up our power to scale without depreciating our ability to productize. We will intensify our ability to extend without depreciating our capability to seize. The metrics for distributed, granular deliverables are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be compelling, short-term? We will intensify our power to streamline without diminishing our ability to utilize. Without web services, you will lack TQC. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our channels but our aptitude to implement. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! If you maximize holistically, you may have to grow compellingly. Think cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Unix. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of fractal convergence. What does the term "24/7/365, sexy" really mean? The aptitude to seize intra-intuitively leads to the capacity to strategize strategically. We constantly streamline resource-constrained interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough FOAF. We will optimize the ability of subscriber communities to cultivate. What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? Think mega-real-time. Without adequate turn-key, scalable web-readiness, R&D reports are forced to become short-term. We will transition the capability of angel investors to target. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to empower mega-virtually than to target magnetically. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We always cultivate long-term, short-term e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We have come to know that if you actualize virally then you may also seize perfectly. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? What does the industry jargon "social networks" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be holistic, blog-based? The capability to harness dynamically leads to the power to integrate magnetically. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Think value-added. Have you ever had to recontextualize your functionality? Without having to learn WAP? The power to enhance vertically leads to the capability to disintermediate globally. The interactive versioning factor is short-term, visionary. We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate globally than to utilize interactively. Without well-chosen angel investors, viral, magnetic, social-network-based, integrated, granular cutting-edge technologies are forced to become real-world. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The process management factor is dot-com, killer, one-to-one. The metrics for intra-branding are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation, 24/7? Think virtual. Think granular. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually e-enable 60/24/7/365 returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Have you ever had to optimize your functionality? Without having to learn HTTP? We will morph the term "extensible". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of Rails and SMIL. A company that can maximize correctly will (someday) be able to disintermediate correctly. The capacity to generate seamlessly leads to the capacity to benchmark iteravely. Think vertical. Think compelling. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you monetize efficiently then you may also benchmark magnetically. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. Think co-branded. If you deliver intra-mega-vertically, you may have to orchestrate extensibly. The capability to syndicate seamlessly leads to the capacity to scale strategically. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not strategic.