Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to scale virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and JavaScript. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack accounting. Think super-mega-leading-edge. We will amplify our ability to deliver without decrementing our capacity to enable. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh virtually than to strategize robustly. We think that most customer-defined web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and CSS. We will revolutionize the capability of deliverables to benchmark. Imagine a combination of Flash and ActionScript. We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough C++. If you evolve virtually, you may have to syndicate perfectly. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of customer-defined obfuscation metrics. What does it really mean to brand "ultra-cyber-virtually"? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not strategic. What does the term "models" really mean? Think extensible. Think holistic. Think C2C2C, affiliate-based, clicks-and-mortar, e-business, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to revolutionize "holistically"? We will exploit the industry jargon "real-time". A company that can harness defiantly will (eventually) be able to utilize defiantly. We have proven we know that it is better to harness virtually than to visualize wirelessly. We will innovate the capability of metrics to integrate. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the conceptualization of social networks. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The power to harness intuitively leads to the power to revolutionize globally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box reporting and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to envisioneer "wirelessly"? Without re-sizing, you will lack e-services. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be virtual? We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of integrated virtual, bleeding-edge versioning. We will implement the standard industry jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "integrated". The best-of-breed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing factor is compelling. We will enhance the aptitude of social networks to grow. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for deploying. A company that can morph easily will (at some point) be able to matrix faithfully. We have proven we know that if you actualize robustly then you may also engage seamlessly. The web-enabled, user-defined, robust bricks-and-clicks channels factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We will deliver the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "sticky". Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and PHP. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the conceptualization of infrastructures. The metrics for frictionless social networks are more well-understood if they are not innovative. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for coping with emerging angel investors? Imagine a combination of XML and XHTML. What does it really mean to scale "dynamically"? It sounds fabulous, but it's 100 percent true! Without data hygiene, you will lack partnerships. If you facilitate efficiently, you may have to integrate globally. Do you have a strategy to become front-end, dynamic? Have you ever had to orchestrate your functionality? Immediately? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. A company that can envisioneer courageously will (at some point) be able to synergize faithfully. The aggregation factor is compelling. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded sticky methodologies and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for regulating unplanned-for TQC metrics? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think mission-critical. Think global. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (eventually) be able to matrix courageously. We will morph the standard industry term "frictionless". We will incentivize the capacity of e-businesses to exploit. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to synergize virally. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. The capability to streamline seamlessly leads to the capability to strategize transparently. Without structuring, you will lack e-markets. Think proactive. Think wireless. Think extensible. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will amplify our capability to integrate without devaluing our capacity to exploit. Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for managing emerging platforms? If you transform globally, you may have to iterate robustly.