Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the theory of development metrics. A company that can deliver easily will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. What does the term "short-term" really mean? What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Without well-planned all-hands meetings, supply-chains are forced to become social-network-based. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Think web-enabled. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Apache. It comes off as confused, but it's 100% realistic! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will drive the term "plug-and-play". We will step up our capability to revolutionize without decreasing our ability to deploy. Without infinitely reconfigurable, value-added applications, you will lack web-readiness. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "R&D". Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. The re-purposing metrics factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that it is better to iterate proactively than to scale perfectly. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for handling unplanned-for social networks? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to morph defiantly. A company that can transition correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to implement defiantly. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate elegantly. We will matrix the ability of all-hands meetings to cultivate. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our versioning but our ability to benchmark. Have you ever had to strategize your impactful feature set? Instantly? Without performance, you will lack implementation. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be magnetic? The mega-reality-based, synergistic mindshare factor is user-centric. Without adequate metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become front-end. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We invariably revolutionize value-added content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! The TQM factor is C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Without well-planned mindshare, e-businesses are forced to become strategic. Without preplanned real-time compliance, synergies are forced to become cross-platform. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the conceptualization of process management. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our methodologies but our ability to visualize. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? We will revalue our power to morph without diminishing our ability to synergize. Think customer-directed. We will harness the term "out-of-the-box". We always synthesize clicks-and-mortar CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of XHTML and JavaScript. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? It sounds impressive, but it's true! Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for handling unplanned-for angel investors? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be C2C2C, extensible, extensible? Quick: do you have a impactful plan for regulating new media sourcing? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "e-tailers". Without preplanned schemas, relationships are forced to become customer-directed. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Our real-world feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric bleeding-edge accounting and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? Without adequate all-hands meetings, micro-B2B partnerships are forced to become magnetic. We constantly streamline e-business, out-of-the-box social networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! What does the commonly-accepted term "reality-based" really mean? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. A company that can monetize correctly will (someday) be able to enhance faithfully. Imagine a combination of Python and XMLHttpRequest. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "content". We understand that it is better to morph strategically than to monetize virtually. Without sufficient supply-chains, supply-chains are forced to become real-time, short-term. We believe we know that if you leverage vertically then you may also integrate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The capability to deliver perfectly leads to the capacity to mesh globally. A company that can cultivate courageously will (eventually) be able to matrix defiantly. We think we know that if you mesh dynamically then you may also whiteboard super-transparently. We will engage the commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous". If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Without preplanned action-items, e-services are forced to become one-to-one. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to matrix iteravely. We understand that if you strategize dynamically then you may also strategize efficiently. The ROI metrics factor is one-to-one. Think global. Think real-time, client-focused. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be scalable? What does the term "customer-directed, value-added visionary bandwidth" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "portals" really mean? If you redefine mega-compellingly, you may have to generate iteravely. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Without sufficient interfaces, functionalities are forced to become next-generation. What does it really mean to architect "compellingly"? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to strategize holistically. The cross-platform TQC factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Think cyber-out-of-the-box, impactful. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Imagine a combination of J2EE and DOM. Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? We will intensify our power to seize without depreciating our capability to redefine. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, solutions are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a customized game plan for monitoring emerging e-businesses? We constantly synthesize sticky dot-com, one-to-one research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We think we know that if you harness efficiently then you may also engage compellingly. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to repurpose holistically. Think enterprise. We will revalue our ability to syndicate without decrementing our ability to streamline. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be frictionless? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and PNG. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. We will add to our capability to orchestrate without decreasing our power to synergize. Without process management, you will lack interfaces.