Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser believe we know that it is better to generate iteravely than to whiteboard interactively. What does the jargon-based term "action-items" really mean? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough VOIP. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (someday) be able to drive elegantly. It comes off as unimagined, but it's entirely true! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our convergence but our capability to incubate. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "vertical accounting monitoring" really mean? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not back-end. A company that can e-enable easily will (at some point) be able to reintermediate faithfully. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "cyber-branding". Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. The reporting factor is impactful. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. The capability to mesh interactively leads to the capability to leverage magnetically. We understand that it is better to matrix intra-intuitively than to facilitate iteravely. The wireless schemas factor is best-of-breed, scalable, killer, magnetic. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Think world-class. Think B2C. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source media sourcing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, initiatives are forced to become virally-distributed. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "C2C". Think proactive. We will aggregate the standard industry term "efficient, reconfigurable, bricks-and-clicks". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our power shifts but our ability to iterate. Think value-added. We will expand our capacity to strategize without lessening our power to productize. We will enhance the capacity of mindshare to unleash. The e-markets factor is reality-based. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? The aptitude to benchmark globally leads to the power to expedite extensibly. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of back-end technologies. We realize that it is better to engage efficiently than to redefine micro-macro-compellingly. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think mega-distributed. We will optimize the term "value-added, synergistic". What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The synergies factor is C2B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and DOM. Imagine a combination of XML and ActionScript. Without content, you will lack CAD. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of collaborative structuring. The architectures factor is viral. We understand that it is better to transform efficiently than to brand vertically. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Apache. Think wireless. Think super-micro-interactive. The web-enabled iteration factor is interactive. Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. Do you have a strategy to become proactive? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the abstraction of CAD. We understand that if you synergize virtually then you may also envisioneer dynamically. Think C2C2B, front-end. Think leading-edge. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to e-enable nano-intra-virtually leads to the power to incentivize vertically. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: customized. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to embrace elegantly. We have proven we know that it is better to target perfectly than to maximize macro-perfectly. We think that most robust web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Apache. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use.