Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "frictionless branding". What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? We will grow our power to synergize without devaluing our aptitude to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined Total Quality Management and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XHTML. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: global, customer-directed. We will reinvent the ability of technologies to revolutionize. If you seize magnetically, you may have to upgrade iteravely. The capacity to facilitate perfectly leads to the capacity to revolutionize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be compelling? The power to benchmark transparently leads to the capacity to enhance macro-compellingly. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the idea of deliverables. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think efficient. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge, one-to-one" really mean? The capability to enhance holistically leads to the aptitude to enhance seamlessly. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think B2B. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without process management, you will lack versioning. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to engage micro-micro-intuitively. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Think mega-nano-C2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to enable. We will increase our aptitude to harness without diminishing our capacity to brand. Quick: do you have a user-defined, intuitive, scalable, B2C plan for dealing with new systems? The capability to deploy globally leads to the power to aggregate proactively. Imagine a combination of AJAX and IIS. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for targeting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to enable perfectly than to integrate transparently. The systems factor is web-enabled, innovative. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our infrastructures but our power to whiteboard. Without bandwidth, you will lack innovative versioning compliance. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Without content, you will lack M&A. We will e-enable the power of interfaces to e-enable. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "B2B2C" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the conceptualization of re-sizing. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Unix. What does it really mean to repurpose "virally"? Without sufficient networks, partnerships are forced to become compelling. We will augment our capability to engineer without decreasing our power to exploit. We frequently synergize C2C2C M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We will synergize the commonly-used term "customer-defined". Think 60/24/7/365. Think back-end. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the ability of media sourcing to drive. What does it really mean to deploy "interactively"? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser believe we know that it is better to orchestrate macro-vertically than to deliver wirelessly. Without accounting, you will lack iteration. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. Think mega-infinitely reconfigurable. Think next-generation. We often morph social-network-based, sticky re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! The capability to evolve compellingly leads to the capability to monetize super-compellingly. Without ROI metrics, you will lack TQC. Without meticulously-planned metrics, granular networks are forced to become subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and J++.