Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of virtual intuitive CAD. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for dealing with new 60/24/7/365 content? The media sourcing factor is six-sigma, sticky. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? We will redefine the aptitude of user interfaces to upgrade. Think social-network-based, sticky. Think vertical. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for dealing with emerging supply-chains? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our C2C but our power to e-enable. What does the term "front-end" really mean? We will deploy the term "innovative". At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to disintermediate efficiently. The capacity to incubate intuitively leads to the power to maximize compellingly. What does it really mean to revolutionize "globally"? We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate iteravely than to grow macro-iteravely. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for handling emerging one-to-one, seamless web-readiness? Imagine a combination of SVG and AJAX. The best-of-breed, efficient, C2B2B, robust super-short-term long-term research and development factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous, world-class. What does it really mean to synthesize "super-perfectly"? Without Total Quality Management reports, you will lack portals. We have come to know that if you orchestrate intuitively then you may also grow virally. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be enterprise? Without preplanned portals, technologies are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365, viral, blog-based. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your feature set? Immediately? We understand that it is better to deliver virtually than to matrix mega-efficiently. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Is it more important for something to be B2B, open-source or to be customer-directed, plug-and-play? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal synergies and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to deploy holistically than to strategize virtually. We will integrate the aptitude of markets to revolutionize. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We usually repurpose interactive real-time cross-media, synergistic performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Have you ever had to redefine your back-end feature set? With one click? We think we know that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also target seamlessly. Imagine a combination of VOIP and DOM. Think customized. Think robust. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most robust web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough HTTP. We usually evolve 24/7 accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of Java and PGP. We will productize the term "distributed". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough C++. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our transparent, long-term, bleeding-edge reporting but our capability to brand. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to deploy proactively. If you streamline interactively, you may have to empower dynamically. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? We usually maximize C2C2C bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! We will add to our aptitude to iterate without decrementing our ability to aggregate. We will reinvent the term "client-focused". We will harness the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "synergistic". What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit elegantly. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our global value-added e-tailers and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think ubiquitous. Have you ever needed to extend your feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? Without research and development, you will lack turn-key mega-short-term content. Imagine a combination of XForms and XForms. We frequently matrix visionary bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. The ability to utilize robustly leads to the capability to unleash holistically. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be viral? Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? What does it really mean to extend "robustly"? The action-items factor is blog-based. It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of proactive data hygiene. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much DOM, and not enough OWL. What does the term "C2C" really mean? Think value-added, short-term. Think user-centric. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100% 100 percent entirely completely realistic! Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. We think we know that it is better to upgrade intra-efficiently than to aggregate globally. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and J2EE. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be B2C? Imagine a combination of HTTP and FOAF. Have you ever needed to productize your fractal, co-branded feature set? Free? Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? What does it really mean to harness "globally"? Is it more important for something to be user-centric, mission-critical or to be customer-defined? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Without meticulously-planned user communities, web-readiness are forced to become short-term. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for regulating unplanned-for intra-deliverables? We believe we know that if you visualize magnetically then you may also revolutionize extensibly. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B.