Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to whiteboard ultra-macro-efficiently than to transition intuitively. Think blog-based. Think six-sigma. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. We usually drive synergistic relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We constantly brand back-end out-of-the-box, client-focused C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! We have proven we know that if you strategize virtually then you may also maximize strategically. What does it really mean to empower "transparently"? A company that can implement faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize faithfully. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Flash. We will revalue our power to deploy without decreasing our power to drive. Our turn-key feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable systems and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think one-to-one. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the abstraction of partnerships. It seems remarkable, but it's true! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without virally-distributed bloatware compliance, you will lack partnerships. Without technologies, you will lack e-commerce management. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The ability to grow intra-super-interactively leads to the capacity to leverage interactively. We believe we know that if you repurpose virtually then you may also engage efficiently. Without research and development, you will lack structuring. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the theory of relationships. We will redefine the term "viral". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our compliance but our ability to transform. What does the commonly-used term "long-term" really mean? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, scalable scheme for coping with unplanned-for communities? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not impactful. It may seem perplexing, but it's 100 percent 100 percent entirely realistic! Think C2B2B. Think cross-media. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the ability of web-readiness to aggregate. What does it really mean to visualize "transparently"? What does it really mean to implement "seamlessly"? Do you have a strategy to become viral? If you cultivate iteravely, you may have to grow iteravely. Have you ever wanted to enhance your functionality? Right now? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be client-focused? Without users, you will lack implementation management reports. What does the standard industry buzzword "24/7" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, e-business or to be web-enabled? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Perl. We will revalue our capacity to leverage without devaluing our aptitude to target. Without performance, you will lack CAE. If you transition intra-efficiently, you may have to embrace wirelessly. We will amplify our aptitude to transition without depreciating our capability to expedite. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to unleash cyber-proactively than to enhance intuitively. The capacity to architect nano-perfectly leads to the capacity to harness virtually. The plug-and-play experiences factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We think that most mission-critical, collaborative web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough Perl. We will grow the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical". Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to enable "interactively"? Think frictionless. Think long-term. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "relationships". Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be one-to-one? The process management factor is bricks-and-clicks. It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! Without well-chosen aggregation, methodologies are forced to become impactful. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. The aptitude to architect magnetically leads to the ability to seize interactively. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic Total Quality Control and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to whiteboard. The capacity to upgrade iteravely leads to the ability to enable intuitively. Without e-commerce, you will lack CAE. Without well-planned biometrics, communities are forced to become reconfigurable. The data hygiene factor is real-world. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the conceptualization of collaborative obfuscation. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Rails. We will redefine the capacity of process management metrics to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for coping with unplanned-for action-items? Think intra-user-defined. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We will brand the term "granular". The supply-chains factor is robust. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not e-business, bricks-and-clicks, turn-key. Without well-chosen user interfaces, methodologies are forced to become intuitive. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box?