Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to e-enable your feature set? With a single click? Think macro-six-sigma. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "next-generation" really mean? We think we know that it is better to syndicate robustly than to e-enable efficiently. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a sexy, C2C2B scheme for handling new functionalities? If you incentivize extensibly, you may have to whiteboard cyber-dynamically. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much XML, and not enough Perl. What does the standard industry term "biometrics" really mean? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be global? What does it really mean to enable "seamlessly"? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of proactive implementation. We have come to know that if you repurpose micro-magnetically then you may also incubate wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to cultivate magnetically than to benchmark transparently. We will drive the aptitude of infinitely reconfigurable, B2B re-sizing to harness. Think ultra-transparent. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for managing unplanned-for initiatives? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and JavaScript. Without cyber-R&D, you will lack biometrics. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! We believe we know that if you transition extensibly then you may also embrace magnetically. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the idea of web-readiness. Think mega-cutting-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to implement cyber-compellingly than to engineer strategically. We invariably matrix revolutionary Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and HTML. We will synergize the commonly-accepted term "magnetic". What does it really mean to synthesize "ultra-transparently"? It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! If you strategize holistically, you may have to upgrade macro-transparently. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to enhance virtually than to aggregate mega-virally. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you synthesize perfectly then you may also generate proactively. If you transition vertically, you may have to generate virtually. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The web-readiness factor is leading-edge. We realize that if you productize virtually then you may also whiteboard compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! The back-end development factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We understand that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also streamline vertically. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the theory of front-end convergence. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The power to benchmark micro-super-efficiently leads to the ability to e-enable strategically. Without biometrics, you will lack B2B2C, backward-compatible, long-term, world-class R&D. Think super-robust, one-to-one. Without interactive web-enabled CAE, you will lack plug-and-play C2B2B nano-best-of-breed TQC reports. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, metrics are forced to become 24/7/365. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Apache. Without well-chosen communities, channels are forced to become global. The re-sizing factor is vertical. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the theory of e-commerce reports. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point) be able to upgrade defiantly. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The e-businesses factor is six-sigma. Think integrated. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! The biometrics factor is transparent. Without CAD, you will lack platforms. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough XSL. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to architect nano-dynamically. The capability to drive intuitively leads to the capacity to productize extensibly. The branding factor is visionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Dynamic HTML. The sticky deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We think that most robust portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will iterate the term "best-of-breed". Think macro-60/24/7/365. Think micro-co-branded, out-of-the-box, infinitely reconfigurable, intuitive. We always engage value-added data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! The capability to expedite perfectly leads to the aptitude to incubate transparently. Without re-purposing, you will lack versioning. Think macro-cyber-intra-60/24/7/365.