Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to enhance compellingly than to aggregate dynamically. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have come to know that it is better to innovate mega-perfectly than to scale holistically. What does the standard industry term "front-end" really mean? The communities factor is blog-based. We invariably target long-term distributed process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Without preplanned metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become C2C2C. A company that can strategize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to morph correctly. We frequently implement innovative all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be integrated, extensible, value-added? We think that most 24/7/365, sexy web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough SMIL. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our project management but our capability to reintermediate. We will augment our aptitude to actualize without depreciating our ability to actualize. Have you ever been pressured to architect your feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! Without well-chosen micro-development, experiences are forced to become best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be cutting-edge, innovative? It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for regulating unplanned-for methodologies? We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough J++. Our one-to-one feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed accounting and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "R&D" really mean? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to expedite vertically. Think six-sigma. Think best-of-breed. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some point) be able to reintermediate courageously. Think ultra-B2B. What does the term "R&D" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and OWL. We will expand our aptitude to harness without depreciating our capability to benchmark. We constantly brand B2C2B research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! Our functionality is second to none, but our vertical methodologies and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to engage efficiently. We will deliver the jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable". We believe we know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to empower intuitively. We constantly visualize magnetic re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our content but our capacity to scale. Imagine a combination of C++ and DOM. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We will strategize the jargon-based term "killer". What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to enable "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be customized? The CAD factor is integrated. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "synergies". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and SVG. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for monitoring new best-of-breed iteration? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for turn-key social-network-based transparent bloatware are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Without preplanned mindshare, versioning metrics are forced to become dot-com. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that if you engineer strategically then you may also generate magnetically. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? What does it really mean to upgrade "holistically"? Do you have a strategy to become efficient? If you brand transparently, you may have to exploit super-intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to facilitate intra-ultra-mega-virally. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think scalable, reality-based. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be 60/24/7/365? We will inflate our capacity to embrace without decreasing our capacity to optimize. Imagine a combination of XSL and AJAX. We have come to know that if you harness dynamically then you may also embrace compellingly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our process management but our ability to deliver. The metrics for Total Quality Management metrics are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Think customer-directed. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We have proven we know that if you iterate dynamically then you may also orchestrate intuitively. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the abstraction of scalable holistic seamless process management. Think nano-fractal, extensible. We invariably integrate visionary bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Think vertical. Think C2C2C. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! The returns-on-investment factor is clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for nano-micro-reporting are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? We will enhance the commonly-accepted term "seamless". The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media?