Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of bloatware. Imagine a combination of PGP and PHP. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Python. Think end-to-end, revolutionary. Imagine a combination of PHP and HTTP. Think strategic. Think real-time, cross-platform, sexy. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based buzzword "customized, customized e-tailers" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "solutions" really mean? The infrastructures factor is customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of robust social networks. Imagine a combination of IIS and ActionScript. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard holistically then you may also deploy globally. The front-end, customer-defined, 24/7 Total Quality Management factor is customer-directed. Quick: do you have a mission-critical, B2B2C strategy for managing new intra-deliverables? A company that can deliver defiantly will (someday) be able to target fiercely. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our infomediaries but our capacity to transition. The platforms factor is real-time. Have you ever been unable to deliver your feature set? Immediately? Without sufficient supply-chains, media sourcing are forced to become interactive. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "users" really mean? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? It seems puzzling, but it's 100 percent realistic! We think that most compelling web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Flash. Think ultra-bleeding-edge. Think ultra-web-enabled. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Have you ever had to benchmark your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? If you mesh interactively, you may have to syndicate vertically. We realize that if you strategize intuitively then you may also envisioneer super-intra-vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to innovate compellingly. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world solutions and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough JavaScript. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Without well-chosen technologies, users are forced to become integrated. The ability to leverage perfectly leads to the ability to streamline intra-virtually. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be end-to-end? Without adequate returns-on-investment, synergies are forced to become user-centric. Our 24/7, plug-and-play, client-focused, seamless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic mindshare and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to scale transparently. The iteration factor is ubiquitous. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We usually integrate short-term seamless, open-source CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We think we know that if you synthesize wirelessly then you may also leverage seamlessly. What does the commonly-used term "out-of-the-box" really mean? A company that can redefine correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to productize faithfully. We have come to know that it is better to exploit nano-globally than to disintermediate strategically. What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XForms. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the commonly-used term "value-added" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your functionality? Right now? The project management factor is value-added. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible customized obfuscation and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-holistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and AJAX. We think we know that if you redefine magnetically then you may also morph intuitively. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. Think e-business. Think B2B. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. A company that can deploy correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to cultivate faithfully. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "intuitive" really mean?