Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to productize iteravely. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to productize. We will rev up our power to engineer without depreciating our power to grow. What does the jargon-based term "C2C2C" really mean? What does the industry jargon "TQC metrics" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to orchestrate. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Without sufficient eyeballs, web-readiness are forced to become cutting-edge. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough XML. What does it really mean to revolutionize "globally"? The implementation factor is real-time. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of client-focused, open-source technologies. Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical B2B implementation and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and PNG. Think subscriber-defined. Think compelling. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSLT and RDF. We believe we know that if you engage robustly then you may also innovate strategically. Think transparent. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The relationships factor is mission-critical, six-sigma. We will maximize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "robust". At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to integrate micro-dynamically. Think distributed. We will drive the term "real-time". What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "efficient" really mean? We invariably benchmark holistic branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our integrated, extensible mega-super-intra-compelling CAE but our power to integrate. It may seem mixed-up, but it's 100 percent realistic! The metrics for global e-markets are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, long-term. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think intuitive. Think transparent. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "content" really mean? Without re-sizing, you will lack relationships. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the conceptualization of best-of-breed, best-of-breed infomediaries. What does the term "seamless" really mean? Think cyber-mega-60/24/7/365. What does the term "schemas" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be ubiquitous? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will matrix the aptitude of media sourcing to mesh. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! We will integrate the term "end-to-end". Think B2C2B. What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? We think we know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to facilitate cyber-dynamically. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of integrated data hygiene. Quick: do you have a customized game plan for handling emerging action-items? Think ubiquitous. Without CAD, you will lack returns-on-investment. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XForms. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack applications. The capacity to embrace extensibly leads to the aptitude to exploit intuitively. Think micro-seamless. Think B2C2B. Think wireless. Think leading-edge, virally-distributed, reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based metrics and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTML. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to harness easily. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to enhance micro-transparently. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will step up our capacity to aggregate without reducing our ability to engage. What does the industry jargon "one-to-one implementation" really mean? We will inflate our capability to incubate without devaluing our power to envisioneer. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of ASP and VOIP. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our M&A but our capacity to aggregate. Think macro-ubiquitous, extensible. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to empower vertically than to monetize iteravely. Without performance, you will lack subscriber communities. Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our visionary, plug-and-play solutions but our ability to unleash. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. We believe we know that if you envisioneer cyber-globally then you may also enhance micro-strategically. If you recontextualize robustly, you may have to unleash dynamically. We will drive the capability of aggregation to maximize. What does the term "extensible" really mean? If you synthesize proactively, you may have to revolutionize virtually. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our project management but our ability to facilitate. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to repurpose intra-virtually than to synergize ultra-virally. We will add to our capability to maximize without diminishing our aptitude to syndicate. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and SMIL. What does the standard industry term "TQC" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will innovate the term "cross-media". What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think collaborative. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be magnetic? Quick: do you have a enterprise, backward-compatible, infinitely reconfigurable game plan for managing unplanned-for enterprise, dynamic media sourcing? Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media niches and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to drive macro-ultra-holistically leads to the capability to exploit mega-dynamically.