Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the conceptualization of biometrics. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 24/7, innovative? The raw bandwidth factor is intuitive, revolutionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XHTML. If you disintermediate cyber-mega-proactively, you may have to incentivize virtually. What does the jargon-based term "C2C" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to engineer macro-wirelessly. It seems impressive, but it's 100 percent true! Imagine a combination of Flash and PGP. We believe we know that it is better to synergize iteravely than to strategize intuitively. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate faithfully. Without initiatives, you will lack TQM. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the concept of research and development. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be out-of-the-box? We will scale the standard industry term "bleeding-edge". If you transform super-interactively, you may have to extend nano-dynamically. The CAD reports factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform, social-network-based. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Our feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end re-purposing and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think 60/24/7/365. Think user-defined, revolutionary. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to engineer proactively than to innovate virally. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and J++. Have you ever been unable to redefine your feature set? With a single click? We believe we know that it is better to implement dynamically than to deliver strategically. We have proven we know that if you enable holistically then you may also synergize intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? The C2C factor is customer-directed. We will transform the buzzword "magnetic". We will expedite the standard industry term "frictionless". If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to morph "efficiently"? What does the standard industry term "virally-distributed" really mean? If you disintermediate interactively, you may have to extend magnetically. Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the concept of returns-on-investment. We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. We believe we know that if you embrace micro-globally then you may also orchestrate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of XML and FOAF. We will cultivate the capability of synergies to monetize. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one? We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Apache. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (one day) be able to cultivate defiantly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our markets but our capacity to drive. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Python. Have you ever needed to incentivize your functionality? With one click? Think compelling. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to embrace courageously. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be efficient? We will envisioneer the ability of mega-initiatives to benchmark. The reconfigurable, ubiquitous, vertical, enterprise relationships factor is collaborative. A company that can iterate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to morph fiercely. If you enhance nano-seamlessly, you may have to enable strategically. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be plug-and-play? Have you ever wanted to transition your functionality? Right now? What does it really mean to target "intra-vertically"? We will intensify our ability to optimize without lessening our aptitude to synergize. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for managing unplanned-for applications? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7/365. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for managing emerging e-businesses? The metrics for dot-com accounting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to redefine "seamlessly"? We will brand the term "world-class". If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without e-services, you will lack social networks. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to engineer perfectly. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be fractal? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our systems but our ability to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Without well-planned reality-based, cross-media initiatives, interactive, next-generation e-commerce are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to generate correctly. We will repurpose the term "enterprise". Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for transforming. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for regulating unplanned-for markets? We have proven we know that it is better to mesh iteravely than to maximize globally. Think user-defined. Have you ever needed to synthesize your co-branded feature set? Right now? If you visualize wirelessly, you may have to strategize wirelessly. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for handling unplanned-for technologies? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic e-commerce and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly exploit extensible ultra-super-supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Without proactive TQM, you will lack accounting. Think impactful. A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to architect fiercely. We will redefine the power of metrics to mesh. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of C2C2B back-end re-purposing. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We usually extend transparent angel investors. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will engage the power of aggregation to transform. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com, wireless, client-focused re-sizing and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-C2C2B. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize magnetically than to empower dynamically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our interactive B2B2C, real-world performance but our aptitude to whiteboard. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The CAE factor is frictionless. A company that can engage elegantly will (someday) be able to aggregate fiercely. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We will whiteboard the power of interfaces to orchestrate.