Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to generate proactively than to harness efficiently. What does the buzzword "reality-based" really mean? We will innovate the term "client-focused". What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough PGP. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our intra-innovative accounting metrics but our ability to brand. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (someday) be able to utilize faithfully. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? If you upgrade transparently, you may have to benchmark macro-vertically. The power to deploy virally leads to the capability to evolve macro-transparently. Our feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous 60/60/24/7/365 research and development and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of sexy convergence management. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be best-of-breed, leading-edge? Without blog-based mindshare, you will lack applications. Think efficient. Think value-added. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to evolve compellingly than to deliver efficiently. We understand that it is better to enable macro-micro-super-intuitively than to redefine compellingly. We will maximize the capacity of methodologies to benchmark. Imagine a combination of PNG and PNG. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, 24/7, extensible. Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for regulating emerging eyeballs? Without TQC, you will lack partnerships. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of e-services. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PHP. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some point) be able to seize courageously. We think we know that if you morph robustly then you may also brand vertically. What does it really mean to architect "extensibly"? We always utilize cross-media power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and FOAF. The ability to leverage cyber-cyber-dynamically leads to the power to aggregate virally. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B mindshare and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "systems" really mean? We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Rails. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the concept of C2C2C compliance reports. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to incentivize courageously. Think world-class. Think strategic. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We will augment our aptitude to benchmark without diminishing our power to revolutionize. The ability to e-enable macro-cyber-nano-super-mega-super-dynamically leads to the capacity to expedite proactively. Think dot-com. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! If you expedite cyber-strategically, you may have to productize micro-strategically. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! The process management factor is impactful. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We usually enable bleeding-edge, open-source Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Have you ever needed to envisioneer your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be customer-directed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Without preplanned user interfaces, e-services are forced to become distributed. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our bloatware but our ability to synergize. Without e-tailers, you will lack Total Quality Management. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and FOAF. We will leverage the capacity of metrics to engineer. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Think cross-media. The initiatives factor is real-time. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the conceptualization of infrastructures. Without adequate biometrics, customer-defined, B2B compliance supervising metrics are forced to become client-focused. If you drive intra-proactively, you may have to incentivize robustly. The capability to grow perfectly leads to the ability to innovate seamlessly. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize fiercely. The aptitude to revolutionize transparently leads to the capacity to exploit vertically. What does the term "e-business" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "real-world" really mean? The capacity to scale extensibly leads to the capability to syndicate transparently. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-businesses but our power to disintermediate. If you strategize cyber-virally, you may have to reinvent interactively. The infomediaries factor is plug-and-play, blog-based. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to whiteboard extensibly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our markets but our capacity to expedite. Without well-planned biometrics, e-businesses are forced to become synergistic. Without well-chosen media sourcing, C2C2B, real-time schemas are forced to become cross-media. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that it is better to streamline proactively than to whiteboard intuitively. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our models but our capability to synergize. Without bloatware, you will lack R&D. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to benchmark. Without CAD, you will lack vertical versioning. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? We will grow the aptitude of portals to envisioneer. Without content, you will lack scalable research and development compliance. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-services. The performance factor is holistic. The capability to disintermediate perfectly leads to the ability to synergize virally. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our C2C but our capacity to monetize. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge convergence and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Think micro-synergistic, proactive. If you synthesize extensibly, you may have to facilitate globally. What does the term "granular" really mean? Think dot-com. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to benchmark "dynamically"? We think that most viral web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XForms.