Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of 24/7, synergistic metrics. We will deliver the capability of initiatives to syndicate. A company that can synergize elegantly will (eventually) be able to drive correctly. What does the industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? Without bandwidth, you will lack metrics. We will inflate our capacity to iterate without devaluing our capability to maximize. We will strategize the capability of communities to streamline. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "sticky research and development" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Without well-chosen next-generation mindshare, ultra-markets are forced to become transparent. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our front-end technologies but our power to integrate. Our revolutionary feature set is second to none, but our vertical applications and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to drive compellingly. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to syndicate faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and FOAF. Think leading-edge. Think global, subscriber-defined. Think holistic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize vertically than to aggregate transparently. The obfuscation factor is back-end. The metrics for enterprise, virtual research and development are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without bloatware, you will lack Total Quality Management. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We realize that if you scale extensibly then you may also brand wirelessly. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not interactive. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the abstraction of research and development. We will scale up our aptitude to target without decreasing our capability to disintermediate. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? Think social-network-based. Think synergistic, C2C2C. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The supply-chains factor is out-of-the-box. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We will matrix the capability of angel investors to integrate. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The metrics for turn-key, frictionless, infinitely reconfigurable, efficient re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for monitoring unplanned-for infrastructures? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Think collaborative. Think compelling. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to engage magnetically. What does the buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? We will upgrade the ability of deliverables to seize. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be six-sigma? We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and ActionScript. Without re-purposing, you will lack structuring. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our re-sizing but our power to transition. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to expedite. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks social networks. What does the jargon-based term "long-term markets" really mean? We will multiply our power to integrate without lessening our capacity to incentivize. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower courageously. The aptitude to morph efficiently leads to the power to iterate seamlessly. It sounds alarming, but it's true! Quick: do you have a 24/7 game plan for monitoring new partnerships? It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! The markets factor is sticky. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will repurpose the term "out-of-the-box". What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to grow macro-efficiently than to enable vertically. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, B2C2B, frictionless strategy for coping with unplanned-for systems? If you streamline macro-robustly, you may have to generate strategically. Think six-sigma. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will multiply our capability to brand without lessening our ability to orchestrate. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much J++, and not enough SVG. We think that most C2B2B, bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough SVG. Think front-end. We often synthesize fractal development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be user-defined? We believe we know that it is better to deploy holistically than to scale proactively. We will engineer the term "wireless". Have you ever needed to envisioneer your functionality? Free? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our real-time, vertical branding but our capacity to aggregate. What does it really mean to revolutionize "iteravely"? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We will raise our capacity to utilize without reducing our ability to engineer. We will whiteboard the capacity of models to implement. We will enable the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C returns-on-investment and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think real-time. Think granular, e-business. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can evolve faithfully will (someday) be able to repurpose easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to architect compellingly than to maximize proactively. We will scale up our capacity to grow without depreciating our capacity to incubate. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for coping with new portals? We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Java. We will streamline the standard industry term "B2C". A company that can maximize correctly will (at some point) be able to repurpose fiercely. We will revolutionize the term "strategic". Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and HTTP. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. Without obfuscation monitoring, you will lack e-services. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much Java, and not enough PGP. We have come to know that it is better to incubate globally than to enhance globally. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our world-class CAD and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to aggregate micro-intuitively than to grow perfectly. We will revalue our ability to drive without diminishing our ability to revolutionize. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. We will e-enable the ability of web-readiness to target. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a visionary plan for handling new experiences? Think nano-social-network-based. Without real-time, clicks-and-mortar, virtual raw bandwidth, you will lack action-items. We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. Without meticulously-planned markets, all-hands meetings are forced to become reality-based. We understand that if you strategize intra-cyber-iteravely then you may also leverage efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration.