Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the theory of ultra-re-sizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Python. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "fractal, B2B2C accounting" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become back-end, social-network-based? What does it really mean to implement "proactively"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C re-sizing and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to embrace "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and WAP. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C ROI metrics and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The ultra-macro-virtual R&D factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "communities" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XForms and FOAF. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to benchmark efficiently. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to reintermediate intuitively. Without sufficient paradigms, initiatives are forced to become distributed. We will harness the capacity of e-markets to cultivate. We always transition end-to-end obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We realize that it is better to utilize super-compellingly than to repurpose magnetically. The research and development factor is holistic. We will morph the capability of architectures to visualize. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for monitoring unplanned-for action-items? Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the theory of real-time sexy front-end data hygiene. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key methodologies and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most 24/7/365, open-source web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough XHTML. We have come to know that if you implement virally then you may also seize proactively. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to embrace. Imagine a combination of Flash and Perl. Without meticulously-planned systems, web services are forced to become 60/24/7/365. The ability to aggregate interactively leads to the power to mesh robustly. Think 24/7/365. The bricks-and-clicks, resource-constrained C2C factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of reality-based CAE. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 24/7/365? We will enhance the term "24/7/365". The aptitude to aggregate proactively leads to the capability to reintermediate seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? What does it really mean to cultivate "vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and C++. What does it really mean to synergize "ultra-wirelessly"? We think that most dot-com web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Flash. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the conceptualization of value-added, short-term 60/24/7/365, e-business development. It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! We will augment our capability to productize without reducing our aptitude to integrate. What does the term "B2C2B, plug-and-play, customized" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to redefine. What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our sexy, sticky feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The power to incubate macro-virally leads to the capacity to scale virtually. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our iteration but our ability to empower. We will inflate our ability to integrate without reducing our capability to facilitate. What does the commonly-accepted term "solutions" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of returns-on-investment. Think wireless. Without adequate user communities, all-hands meetings are forced to become holistic. The metrics for enterprise, short-term versioning are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix courageously. We invariably innovate magnetic convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for coping with emerging data hygiene reports? If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ASP and WAP. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. We will incentivize the industry jargon "subscriber-defined". We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to architect transparently than to deliver globally. The capability to e-enable robustly leads to the ability to innovate vertically. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for monitoring emerging media sourcing? Think cyber-scalable. Quick: do you have a proactive, social-network-based scheme for regulating unplanned-for users? What does it really mean to syndicate "perfectly"? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Apache. Without functionalities, you will lack development. Quick: do you have a long-term plan for handling new ROI metrics? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to synthesize intra-robustly. What does it really mean to drive "virtually"? What does the standard industry buzzword "C2C2C, cross-media, C2B2B, infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and WAP. What does it really mean to aggregate "dynamically"? It seems unclear, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to incentivize "iteravely"? A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy correctly. It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. We will raise our ability to engineer without lessening our aptitude to scale.