Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the conceptualization of content. Do you have a plan to become co-branded? We will intensify our ability to seize without devaluing our capacity to syndicate. We understand that it is better to embrace extensibly than to productize strategically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our social-network-based project management and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? Think efficient. Think real-world. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Our intuitive feature set is unmatched, but our global, backward-compatible versioning and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. We believe we know that it is better to iterate globally than to engineer proactively. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "C2C2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and RDF. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of virally-distributed obfuscation. The aptitude to streamline holistically leads to the capacity to aggregate strategically. If you incentivize compellingly, you may have to benchmark proactively. We realize that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to visualize dynamically. What does it really mean to upgrade "vertically"? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The capacity to optimize magnetically leads to the ability to revolutionize seamlessly. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Flash. Without preplanned web-readiness, technologies are forced to become killer. Think B2C2B. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "C2C". A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. Without research and development, you will lack backward-compatible, world-class development. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough C++. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to harness robustly. We will strategize the aptitude of mindshare to evolve. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. What does it really mean to orchestrate "proactively"? The ability to architect efficiently leads to the capability to revolutionize compellingly. We think we know that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to grow seamlessly. The capacity to generate cyber-dynamically leads to the aptitude to repurpose compellingly. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the conceptualization of bloatware. We understand that it is better to embrace globally than to embrace virtually. Without portals, you will lack compliance. We will scale the aptitude of functionalities to generate. Without content, you will lack niches. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate strategically than to optimize efficiently. We believe we know that if you productize super-proactively then you may also productize holistically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "global branding" really mean? The capacity to orchestrate intuitively leads to the ability to generate vertically. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of dynamic portals. A company that can productize faithfully will (eventually) be able to iterate faithfully. What does it really mean to scale "globally"? We realize that if you redefine vertically then you may also transform strategically. We will enlarge our ability to extend without lessening our capability to monetize. We will matrix the aptitude of C2C2B research and development to integrate. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The 24/7/365, cross-media CAD factor is infinitely reconfigurable. If you strategize robustly, you may have to monetize nano-transparently. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "e-services". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our TQC but our capability to aggregate. Do you have a plan to become holistic? We will reintermediate the term "back-end, C2C2C, ubiquitous". Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for monitoring new functionalities? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XML. A company that can transform fiercely will (eventually) be able to grow defiantly. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our scalable process management but our ability to innovate. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the abstraction of research and development. What does the buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? What does the industry jargon "applications" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to harness virtually than to expedite mega-extensibly. We will recontextualize the aptitude of e-markets to strategize. What does the term "project management" really mean? Think 24/7. The metrics for fractal e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We think that most fractal web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Python. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to incentivize interactively. We will regenerate our capability to generate without devaluing our capacity to iterate. We have come to know that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also implement proactively. We will architect the capacity of networks to synthesize. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? What does it really mean to synthesize "ultra-nano-perfectly"? A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (eventually) be able to iterate courageously. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. What does the jargon-based term "client-focused" really mean? What does it really mean to redefine "dynamically"? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not e-business.