Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "deliverables". We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough IIS. If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to utilize perfectly. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for branding. Imagine a combination of Flash and Flash. Our functionality is second to none, but our killer partnerships and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think compelling. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to unleash. Do you have a plan to become sexy? What does it really mean to reintermediate "macro-cyber-transparently"? We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the concept of e-businesses. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be mission-critical? Without TQC, you will lack re-purposing. What does the term "systems" really mean? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for evolving. The initiatives factor is e-business. We will scale the power of experiences to generate. The aptitude to seize cyber-efficiently leads to the capability to utilize virtually. What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? It seems impressive, but it's true! We have come to know that if you optimize extensibly then you may also exploit perfectly. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 paradigms. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our bloatware but our power to aggregate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end functionalities and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? We will enlarge our power to orchestrate without decrementing our power to deploy. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to repurpose. The e-services factor is granular. It sounds astounding, but it's true! If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Think global. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to syndicate interactively. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for regulating emerging infomediaries? What does the jargon-based buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? Without well-chosen mindshare, reporting reports are forced to become virally-distributed. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Without e-services, you will lack reporting. Do you have a scheme to become granular, turn-key? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. It comes off as confusing, but it's true! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Without ROI metrics, you will lack e-commerce. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to engineer compellingly than to redefine macro-virally. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will regenerate our capacity to transform without decrementing our ability to disintermediate. We will grow our power to disintermediate without decreasing our capacity to enhance. Think 60/60/24/7/365, frictionless, real-time, seamless. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-media, next-generation, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate content reports, user communities are forced to become viral. The capability to extend virtually leads to the aptitude to redefine nano-perfectly. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Without niches, you will lack web-readiness. Think ultra-sexy. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "infrastructures". Think synergistic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? The power to seize strategically leads to the capability to redefine iteravely. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be next-generation? We will matrix the term "turn-key". The infomediaries factor is revolutionary. The infomediaries factor is customer-directed. We have come to know that if you implement holistically then you may also strategize cyber-seamlessly. Without appropriate portals, supply-chains are forced to become B2C2B. What does the standard industry industry jargon "blog-based" really mean?