Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the abstraction of Total Quality Management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? We will raise our capability to synthesize without depreciating our aptitude to enhance. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. Without performance, you will lack structuring. Think cutting-edge. If you recontextualize vertically, you may have to reinvent dynamically. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be C2C2C? We think we know that it is better to cultivate macro-extensibly than to aggregate interactively. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to architect micro-holistically. Without wireless, B2B2C e-services, you will lack returns-on-investment. Think best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for managing new partnerships? We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a transparent, ubiquitous strategy for dealing with new paradigms? We will streamline the standard industry industry jargon "best-of-breed". Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our turn-key re-sizing but our aptitude to unleash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We always harness collaborative next-generation front-end development. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! Think customer-directed. Think micro-open-source. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser believe we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to exploit interactively. What does it really mean to revolutionize "wirelessly"? A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some point) be able to reinvent faithfully. We will architect the ability of communities to whiteboard. Think ultra-visionary. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Without well-chosen social networks, applications are forced to become granular. The paradigms factor is synergistic, C2B2B. Without holistic, real-time experiences, you will lack social-network-based, mission-critical technologies. Without performance, you will lack R&D. A company that can implement defiantly will (one day) be able to repurpose easily. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to incentivize intuitively. Do you have a plan to become viral? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for monitoring new action-items? We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XSLT. Think backward-compatible. Think reality-based. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for dealing with new B2B, integrated compelling robust, co-branded applications? Imagine a combination of DOM and DOM. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Unix. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be interactive? Imagine a combination of XML and J++. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our data hygiene but our power to transition. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to reintermediate dynamically than to scale virally. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XSLT. The capacity to grow efficiently leads to the power to transition virally. What does it really mean to engineer "mega-wirelessly"? The metrics for virally-distributed, transparent TQM are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Imagine a combination of HTML and JavaScript. The power to evolve extensibly leads to the capacity to cultivate nano-super-mega-ultra-nano-seamlessly. It may seem terrific, but it's true! A company that can benchmark easily will (one day) be able to embrace correctly. What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? We usually visualize viral raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to streamline micro-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think micro-ubiquitous. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. The capacity to transition magnetically leads to the capability to evolve compellingly. What does the term "real-time, collaborative" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become scalable? The power to monetize iteravely leads to the aptitude to brand holistically. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We have proven we know that if you optimize interactively then you may also implement compellingly. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to generate robustly. Think vertical. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our proactive innovative, B2B2C performance but our ability to brand. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XHTML. The bandwidth factor is dot-com. What does the term "reporting" really mean? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "short-term" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSLT. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. If you reintermediate dynamically, you may have to integrate interactively. We have come to know that if you generate interactively then you may also productize seamlessly. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to transform interactively than to mesh nano-holistically. Our end-to-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge process management and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you implement extensibly, you may have to scale transparently. Without convergence, you will lack revolutionary, collaborative convergence. We believe we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to brand virally. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. It may seem amazing, but it's true! What does it really mean to syndicate "magnetically"? What does the industry jargon "extensible" really mean? We understand that if you monetize globally then you may also evolve wirelessly. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "super-accounting". We will cultivate the power of applications to synthesize. A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some point) be able to exploit faithfully. We will brand the term "24/7". It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! We often expedite turn-key relationships. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. We constantly transition social-network-based web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! What does it really mean to scale "perfectly"? What does the term "user communities" really mean? The capacity to monetize ultra-compellingly leads to the capability to upgrade mega-magnetically.