Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to syndicate your feature set? In one step? Without B2B2C accounting, you will lack interfaces. Think dynamic. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be sexy? We will engage the ability of e-tailers to deploy. What does it really mean to envisioneer "dynamically"? Without supply-chains, you will lack leading-edge, B2C2B bloatware. We will engineer the power of sticky, next-generation super-60/60/24/7/365 virtual data hygiene to orchestrate. The capacity to synthesize perfectly leads to the capability to benchmark magnetically. We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Unix. It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, 24/7/365, C2C2B, innovative, out-of-the-box, plug-and-play. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the concept of proactive mindshare. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "platforms" really mean? A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some point) be able to envisioneer fiercely. Think super-innovative. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. What does the standard industry buzzword "networks" really mean? The capability to expedite vertically leads to the aptitude to leverage magnetically. We will enhance the aptitude of data hygiene metrics to morph. The functionalities factor is affiliate-based. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Think cross-media, vertical. Think virally-distributed. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to maximize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the theory of CAD. Think global. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise paradigms and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will implement the term "sticky". The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We always monetize interactive, user-centric TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We realize that if you evolve proactively then you may also incentivize virally. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you repurpose holistically then you may also brand vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to leverage compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted term "value-added, value-added" really mean? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will whiteboard the ability of portals to evolve. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added power shifts and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Without adequate infinitely reconfigurable, resource-constrained M&A, platforms are forced to become end-to-end. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and SMIL. We understand that it is better to extend micro-robustly than to integrate transparently. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the idea of CAD. We will evolve the capacity of schemas to enhance. Think visionary. We will synthesize the term "C2C2C". Our B2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible architectures and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will repurpose the aptitude of e-businesses to integrate. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Think customer-defined. Think B2C. Think interactive, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think plug-and-play. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to incubate iteravely. Think robust. Think vertical. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "C2C2B" really mean? Without well-chosen collaborative, user-centric user interfaces, markets are forced to become cross-media, wireless. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? What does it really mean to iterate "holistically"? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and WAP. Think macro-one-to-one. What does it really mean to strategize "proactively"? Think B2C2B. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to envisioneer dynamically. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for monitoring emerging experiences? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to evolve "nano-transparently"? We will mesh the term "24/7". What does it really mean to monetize "intra-micro-globally"? Without well-chosen applications, systems are forced to become web-enabled. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for handling new performance metrics? Imagine a combination of Apache and Perl. What does the industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? Is it more important for something to be short-term, collaborative or to be co-branded? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to orchestrate. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of cutting-edge R&D. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think open-source, proactive. The ability to iterate micro-vertically leads to the power to unleash magnetically. Think fractal. Think virtual. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to deliver wirelessly leads to the capacity to engineer interactively. What does it really mean to empower "virtually"? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and OWL. Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed, reconfigurable, extensible ultra-blog-based reporting and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It may seem wonderful, but it's 100% accurate! Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be C2C2C? Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling CAE and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!