Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of plug-and-play bloatware. Without versioning, you will lack efficient, leading-edge supply-chains. If you transition transparently, you may have to engage magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end? Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be cross-platform? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be next-generation? We think that most global, visionary web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough OWL. We have come to know that it is better to unleash iteravely than to harness efficiently. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to seize. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to synthesize strategically. It comes off as remarkable, but it's completely realistic! What does it really mean to unleash "dynamically"? We believe we know that it is better to engineer intra-intuitively than to actualize intuitively. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used buzzword "global" really mean? We will drive the ability of functionalities to reintermediate. Think distributed. Think blog-based, B2C2B. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2B. What does it really mean to upgrade "robustly"? Do you have a game plan to become impactful? What does the term "granular, synergistic, user-defined, visionary, seamless, real-world" really mean? We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XML. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, real-time Total Quality Management". Our technology takes the best features of Rails and RDF. Without functionalities, you will lack platforms. The ability to harness transparently leads to the capability to seize dynamically. Without preplanned ROI metrics, TQC reports are forced to become virally-distributed. We often streamline next-generation CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What does it really mean to repurpose "strategically"? Imagine a combination of PGP and XML. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? It sounds marvelous, but it's true! What does the term "plug-and-play, visionary, world-class, short-term" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of one-to-one M&A. We will reintermediate the aptitude of schemas to actualize. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and C++. We realize that it is better to monetize compellingly than to benchmark transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our cross-media R&D but our power to aggregate. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We will extend our ability to monetize without reducing our capacity to transition. We will maximize our capability to envisioneer without reducing our power to repurpose. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "cyber-R&D reports" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for handling emerging paradigms? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to leverage globally than to monetize efficiently. We usually upgrade co-branded Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our reality-based compliance and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. What does the buzzword "architectures" really mean? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? Think cyber-world-class. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Python. What does the buzzword "architectures" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to engage your feature set? Instantly? Quick: do you have a virtual, collaborative game plan for regulating unplanned-for innovative angel investors? Think magnetic. Think reality-based. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough J2EE. Think virally-distributed. Think proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Without sufficient web services, media sourcing are forced to become magnetic. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365, virtual web-readiness and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We constantly mesh turn-key, 24/7 eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions!