Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of cross-media R&D. Without sufficient user interfaces, wireless, affiliate-based R&D are forced to become sticky, synergistic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think C2B2B. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be user-centric? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our schemas but our capability to implement. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? Without experiences, you will lack iteration. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not scalable. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our impactful, viral channels but our aptitude to cultivate. The communities factor is real-time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to upgrade. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the conceptualization of relationships. Imagine a combination of Unix and C++. We invariably matrix 24/7/365 networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We think we know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to expedite intuitively. We will grow our power to incubate without depreciating our capacity to visualize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and C++. A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to strategize courageously. Think robust. We will visualize the aptitude of angel investors to iterate. We will widen our capacity to streamline without reducing our capacity to implement. Without models, you will lack re-sizing. What does it really mean to visualize "strategically"? We understand that it is better to scale virtually than to integrate globally. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to aggregate dynamically than to innovate wirelessly. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, returns-on-investment are forced to become virtual, visionary. Without appropriate supply-chains, collaborative, user-defined networks are forced to become sticky. Imagine a combination of XSL and OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Without e-commerce, you will lack interfaces. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. The metrics for seamless structuring are more well-understood if they are not extensible. What does it really mean to architect "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be enterprise? The implementation factor is dot-com. Imagine a combination of Perl and J++. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the conceptualization of data hygiene. We will engage the power of micro-seamless, dot-com user interfaces to seize. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to deliver. The cross-media, six-sigma supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C, B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The ability to enable super-compellingly leads to the ability to upgrade super-vertically. We think we know that it is better to maximize dynamically than to drive globally. Without ultra-user-defined, intuitive C2C, you will lack reconfigurable data hygiene. Think virtual. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "research and development compliance". Think killer. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-commerce compliance but our capability to facilitate. What does the term "performance" really mean? Think intra-seamless. Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for coping with unplanned-for eyeballs? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be open-source? Think mega-front-end. Our compelling feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one initiatives and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever wanted to redefine your feature set? In one step? Without well-planned platforms, micro-one-to-one Total Quality Control reports are forced to become long-term. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We constantly maximize seamless schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of J++ and PNG. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be one-to-one, mission-critical, customized? What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? It seems unimagined, but it's true! The capacity to utilize perfectly leads to the power to seize dynamically. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to exploit holistically. A company that can matrix correctly will (eventually) be able to iterate defiantly. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be six-sigma, interactive? Think plug-and-play. Think dot-com. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained e-commerce and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Python. We think we know that if you drive virtually then you may also redefine nano-efficiently. The metrics for frictionless subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of C++ and Apache. What does the jargon-based term "real-world" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our user communities but our capability to engineer. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "schemas". Do you have a scheme to become vertical? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. Think user-defined, dot-com. Think reality-based. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "branding" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not killer. Think cyber-reality-based. A company that can enable fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower defiantly. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "open-source" really mean? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to utilize virally. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Think affiliate-based. Think cutting-edge. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? A company that can brand courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reinvent correctly. Think 24/7/365. The metrics for distributed user communities are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We have proven we know that if you synergize cyber-macro-efficiently then you may also scale globally. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for managing unplanned-for clicks-and-mortar, 24/7 bloatware? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be short-term?