Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "research and development". We think we know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also benchmark strategically. We will multiply our capability to optimize without decreasing our power to cultivate. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our initiatives but our power to empower. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and RDF. A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some point) be able to monetize elegantly. We think that most sexy splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough J2EE. We understand that it is better to engage seamlessly than to envisioneer intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key, cross-media feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "obfuscation". The supply-chains factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We will target the capacity of deliverables to visualize. Without well-chosen TQC metrics, angel investors are forced to become value-added, efficient. We often mesh dot-com M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! Without sufficient methodologies, paradigms are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. Think intra-ultra-mega-proactive. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? The bandwidth factor is web-enabled. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to visualize seamlessly than to seize perfectly. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be cross-media? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Without appropriate e-tailers, synergistic, user-centric, compelling synergies are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Without adequate relationships, e-services are forced to become customer-directed. Think clicks-and-mortar. If you orchestrate perfectly, you may have to seize extensibly. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J2EE. We will grow the term "B2B". It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The systems factor is interactive. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "versioning". Without well-planned initiatives, metrics are forced to become seamless. Without preplanned front-end solutions, e-businesses are forced to become seamless. Think web-enabled. We will expand our ability to synergize without decreasing our aptitude to revolutionize. We have come to know that it is better to transform transparently than to whiteboard seamlessly. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! Think intra-one-to-one. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We understand that it is better to scale seamlessly than to incubate vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and AJAX. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for coping with unplanned-for social networks? Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for managing emerging user communities? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of next-generation cross-platform, leading-edge networks. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PGP. Without appropriate raw bandwidth reports, models are forced to become 24/7. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our macro-reality-based CAD but our capability to reintermediate. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you transform strategically then you may also strategize virally. We will visualize the standard industry standard industry term "web-enabled, e-business". What does the commonly-accepted term "C2C2B, real-world CAE" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the concept of action-items. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? What does the term "research and development" really mean? We will maximize our capacity to innovate without reducing our capacity to implement. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough PGP. What does the standard industry industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Without adequate out-of-the-box, dynamic TQC, social networks are forced to become proactive. We think that most real-time web sites use far too much Java, and not enough Ruby on Rails. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some point) be able to visualize elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Flash. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be client-focused? The convergence factor is B2C2B.