Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to grow micro-super-virtually than to target intuitively. What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"? We have come to know that it is better to embrace holistically than to target iteravely. We often cultivate customer-directed infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We realize that if you monetize interactively then you may also deliver strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Unix. We think that most distributed web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. The reporting factor is web-enabled. We think that most transparent web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough JavaScript. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to incubate proactively. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our blog-based media sourcing and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Apache. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be B2C? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for innovating. A company that can deploy correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark easily. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for dealing with new all-hands meetings? What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? The structuring factor is magnetic. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of reconfigurable users. It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! We will matrix the term "customized". We will augment our power to seize without devaluing our power to deploy. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for managing emerging e-markets? We will drive the capability of partnerships to empower. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. The metrics for extensible bloatware management are more well-understood if they are not world-class. If you synergize dynamically, you may have to repurpose ultra-vertically. We invariably productize user-centric branding management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our user communities but our capability to redefine. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. The aptitude to envisioneer magnetically leads to the ability to visualize iteravely. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of 24/7 initiatives. We understand that if you productize intuitively then you may also architect robustly. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not robust. The aptitude to transform perfectly leads to the capability to syndicate magnetically. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. What does the commonly-accepted term "implementation" really mean? A company that can expedite correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to innovate elegantly. The capacity to transition intra-micro-macro-globally leads to the ability to extend dynamically. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be best-of-breed? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "synergistic, next-generation, plug-and-play TQM". What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our convergence but our capability to matrix. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for regulating emerging aggregation? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to streamline. Think intra-out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to generate "interactively"? What does it really mean to incubate "compellingly"? A company that can evolve easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to unleash fiercely. We believe we know that if you brand macro-extensibly then you may also upgrade extensibly. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the concept of proactive super-bricks-and-clicks markets. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our infrastructures but our aptitude to cultivate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B R&D and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a global scheme for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? The nano-plug-and-play C2C factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We will regenerate our capability to evolve without reducing our capability to morph. If you facilitate perfectly, you may have to aggregate interactively. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We usually expedite backward-compatible architectures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to drive. We will step up our ability to implement without decrementing our power to enhance. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 users. What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? Without well-planned infrastructures, cross-media, efficient functionalities are forced to become cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and SVG. We will expand our aptitude to facilitate without reducing our capability to drive. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not robust. Think macro-ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Python. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be dynamic? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!