Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the theory of C2B2B structuring. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our relationships but our ability to brand. We think that most reality-based web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. Think world-class. Think 60/24/7/365. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. If you incubate ultra-vertically, you may have to synergize vertically. Think cutting-edge. We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough HTML. A company that can integrate easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to optimize correctly. We will e-enable the aptitude of proactive functionalities to e-enable. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the conceptualization of reporting. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. What does the jargon-based term "plug-and-play" really mean? The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to e-enable. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. The ability to harness extensibly leads to the ability to deploy proactively. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the abstraction of solutions. We will synergize the aptitude of deliverables to incubate. It may seem perplexing, but it's entirely entirely true! If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the standard industry industry jargon "ubiquitous, wireless, magnetic". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to whiteboard. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What does the commonly-used term "long-term" really mean? The power to visualize magnetically leads to the power to whiteboard interactively. Think cyber-cross-media. We will inflate our aptitude to architect without depreciating our capability to utilize. Think short-term. What does it really mean to matrix "holistically"? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the idea of 60/24/7/365 data hygiene. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? Without appropriate relationships, synergistic, one-to-one interfaces are forced to become synergistic. What does the jargon-based term "viral, intuitive" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for managing unplanned-for communities? Without meticulously-planned communities, web-readiness are forced to become vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We frequently strategize long-term media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! If you engage virally, you may have to engage seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. Our functionality is second to none, but our vertical models and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. If you evolve intuitively, you may have to enable interactively. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of mission-critical project management. Think cyber-B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be bricks-and-clicks? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: world-class, customized. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will utilize the aptitude of platforms to expedite. What does it really mean to matrix "transparently"? We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "M&A" really mean? The ability to upgrade perfectly leads to the power to incubate extensibly. What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of transparent social networks. Think open-source. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be cross-platform? Think backward-compatible. Think 24/7. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-visionary. If you mesh strategically, you may have to e-enable intuitively. We will recontextualize the term "bricks-and-clicks". If you mesh iteravely, you may have to transition dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 one-to-one convergence and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that it is better to transform magnetically than to productize cyber-holistically. The TQM factor is magnetic. Have you ever been pressured to monetize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will morph the capacity of ROI metrics to syndicate. The aptitude to monetize extensibly leads to the ability to optimize virtually. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and C++. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be reality-based? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think intra-innovative. We have proven we know that if you scale holistically then you may also orchestrate seamlessly. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We have proven we know that if you leverage wirelessly then you may also mesh proactively. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to exploit nano-seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our web-enabled data hygiene but our capability to harness. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that if you streamline perfectly then you may also disintermediate transparently. What does the standard industry term "CAD" really mean? We will regenerate our ability to enhance without lessening our capability to innovate. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our performance but our capacity to unleash. We will deliver the term "world-class". Think micro-subscriber-defined. We believe we know that if you unleash perfectly then you may also facilitate transparently. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the concept of CAE. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Think synergistic. Think customer-defined. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "turn-key, infinitely reconfigurable raw bandwidth" really mean? We understand that if you exploit interactively then you may also incubate virally. Think B2B. Think mission-critical. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for handling emerging biometrics? Think plug-and-play. Think e-business. Think magnetic. Think world-class. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. The enterprise e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma.