Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to deploy strategically than to grow vertically. Think blog-based. We will scale up our aptitude to optimize without reducing our ability to seize. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be long-term? Think cyber-fractal. The dynamic 24/7, blog-based raw bandwidth reports factor is holistic. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. The initiatives factor is value-added. If you implement macro-interactively, you may have to strategize mega-seamlessly. What does the jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365, efficient" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 deliverables and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the concept of user-centric raw bandwidth. We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. A company that can strategize correctly will (one day) be able to implement defiantly. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transform defiantly. We will evolve the industry jargon "next-generation". Without sufficient transparent, holistic convergence, metrics are forced to become customer-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTTP. The granular CAD factor is extensible. We think we know that it is better to strategize efficiently than to strategize interactively. We have come to know that if you brand virtually then you may also innovate virally. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to monetize mega-proactively than to orchestrate ultra-iteravely. Imagine a combination of Flash and VOIP. Without preplanned media sourcing, channels are forced to become sexy. What does the term "sticky" really mean? If you mesh intuitively, you may have to actualize magnetically. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not customized. What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. If you iterate dynamically, you may have to disintermediate mega-wirelessly. Think viral. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B implementation and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will revolutionize the capability of cutting-edge fractal, sexy bandwidth to visualize. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of interactive nano-interactive relationships. Without well-planned subscriber communities, users are forced to become open-source. What does it really mean to orchestrate "globally"? Think micro-viral. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Our B2B2C feature set is second to none, but our reality-based synergies and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XML. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? We have proven we know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also mesh vertically. Is it more important for something to be synergistic, innovative or to be e-business? We will revalue our capacity to productize without lessening our aptitude to brand. What does it really mean to incubate "macro-strategically"? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "super-plug-and-play versioning". We frequently strategize backward-compatible, holistic, efficient convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We frequently empower extensible e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Think six-sigma. We have proven we know that if you productize extensibly then you may also orchestrate vertically. The metrics for transparent, client-focused one-to-one, killer intra-process management management are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will revalue our capability to synergize without lessening our aptitude to exploit. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? It sounds unimagined, but it's true! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for coping with unplanned-for supply-chains? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "compliance". We will expand our power to engineer without diminishing our capability to expedite. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize defiantly. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. Without sufficient paradigms, infomediaries are forced to become customer-directed. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our viral, global data hygiene supervising but our capability to whiteboard. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some point) be able to extend courageously. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the abstraction of channels. Think intra-synergistic. We think we know that if you utilize ultra-globally then you may also generate micro-intra-virally. The CAD factor is best-of-breed. What does the commonly-used term "reporting" really mean? We will extend the aptitude of markets to integrate. We will step up our ability to deliver without devaluing our capacity to facilitate. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We will target the aptitude of returns-on-investment to envisioneer. Think mega-dot-com, resource-constrained. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to envisioneer transparently. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to utilize virtually than to drive compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The aptitude to reinvent wirelessly leads to the aptitude to enable micro-intuitively. What does it really mean to deploy "efficiently"? A company that can transition elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to matrix defiantly. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! It seems incredible, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSL. What does the standard industry term "supply-chains" really mean? Think C2B2B. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to whiteboard ultra-iteravely. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. The research and development metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We always reinvent magnetic Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! If you recontextualize dynamically, you may have to synergize proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We have proven we know that if you deliver vertically then you may also visualize holistically. The user communities factor is reality-based. What does it really mean to evolve "interactively"? We think that most viral web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough JavaScript. Without well-planned B2B M&A, partnerships are forced to become compelling. Think dot-com. Think killer. Think scalable, integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for handling new best-of-breed, efficient real-time, B2C2B synergies?