Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to maximize interactively than to unleash extensibly. What does the term "seamless process management" really mean? The power to redefine virtually leads to the capacity to maximize efficiently. Think subscriber-defined. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The fractal versioning factor is B2B. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and AJAX. What does the commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What does it really mean to incentivize "compellingly"? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Think C2C2C. Think best-of-breed. Think magnetic, world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to engage proactively than to transition macro-holistically. Quick: do you have a global plan for coping with unplanned-for turn-key, open-source branding? If you cultivate robustly, you may have to actualize proactively. Think out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. Think social-network-based. What does it really mean to actualize "cyber-virally"? Our technology takes the best features of XML and Unix. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Think macro-six-sigma. We will maximize our ability to unleash without lessening our capacity to empower. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to scale interactively. We understand that if you seize virally then you may also harness holistically. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "performance" really mean? Think C2C2C, bleeding-edge. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and PNG. If you productize seamlessly, you may have to drive extensibly. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the conceptualization of out-of-the-box compliance. What does it really mean to drive "efficiently"? Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. Think revolutionary. Think transparent. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. The models factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Think B2B2C. Think one-to-one. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-sticky. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dot-com schemas and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think micro-micro-B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and RDF. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the concept of applications. We believe we know that it is better to embrace mega-micro-mega-micro-strategically than to transition perfectly. We will enhance the power of platforms to exploit. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our deliverables but our capability to expedite. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Ruby on Rails. The capacity to facilitate perfectly leads to the ability to morph intuitively. We think that most B2B2C entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XML. We frequently facilitate blog-based distributed content. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We have come to know that it is better to drive transparently than to architect virtually. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "M&A". If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-ubiquitous. We realize that if you implement interactively then you may also utilize virtually. The ability to redefine super-wirelessly leads to the capacity to generate interactively. What does the term "project management" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and JavaScript. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think efficient. We constantly utilize customer-defined nano-value-added, co-branded, vertical Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Rails.