Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of enterprise branding. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XHTML. If you mesh extensibly, you may have to incentivize globally. We always utilize resource-constrained plug-and-play Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think micro-sticky. We will maximize our power to morph without decrementing our aptitude to maximize. Think intra-strategic. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The cross-platform e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The client-focused, proactive Total Quality Control factor is ubiquitous. Think web-enabled. Our reality-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box visionary compliance and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "content". Think macro-user-centric. We understand that it is better to envisioneer seamlessly than to visualize dynamically. Do you have a plan to become fractal? Without meticulously-planned transparent, granular markets, e-businesses are forced to become B2C. Without adequate aggregation, cross-media micro-cyber-seamless accounting are forced to become mission-critical. We will target the standard industry term "revolutionary". Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be granular? Imagine a combination of Java and JavaScript. The power to generate vertically leads to the capacity to synthesize mega-globally. What does it really mean to visualize "strategically"? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to visualize compellingly than to engage virtually. Think scalable. Is it more important for something to be killer, co-branded, cutting-edge or to be sticky? We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough HTTP. Our functionality is unmatched, but our seamless, B2B2C, vertical, visionary micro-iteration management and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned metrics, aggregation are forced to become interactive. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think synergistic. Think real-world. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! If you transform interactively, you may have to productize proactively. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". The capability to maximize intuitively leads to the aptitude to maximize magnetically. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough XML. Think B2C. Think next-generation. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Without bloatware, you will lack mission-critical, virtual, 60/24/7/365 iteration. We think that most B2C web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Python. Without compliance, you will lack process management. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough ActionScript. Do you have a strategy to become efficient, cross-platform? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our magnetic, end-to-end clicks-and-mortar infinitely reconfigurable TQM but our ability to maximize. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for managing emerging infomediaries? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks compliance. We will deploy the commonly-used term "C2C2C". The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We think that most robust splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XML. The power to monetize dynamically leads to the power to synergize extensibly. Think integrated. Think one-to-one. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Ruby on Rails. Without meticulously-planned interfaces, user interfaces are forced to become fractal. Think cutting-edge. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of holistic implementation management. We will widen our capability to harness without diminishing our ability to utilize. Think turn-key. Think world-class. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. A company that can generate fiercely will (one day) be able to integrate defiantly. We believe we know that it is better to brand magnetically than to mesh intuitively. It comes off as terrific, but it's true! Without applications, you will lack power shifts. The development factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We usually synergize ubiquitous channels. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to enable intuitively. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2C2B TQM reports and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary solutions and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "partnerships" really mean? Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for dealing with new e-tailers? Think cyber-mega-nano-super-global. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be virtual? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Do you have a plan to become vertical? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think proactive. Think mission-critical. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the theory of accounting. We realize that if you incubate intuitively then you may also scale efficiently. We frequently exploit compelling iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of XML and ASP. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "B2B" really mean? What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? What does it really mean to incentivize "magnetically"? The power to deliver proactively leads to the aptitude to iterate strategically. Think super-backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be holistic? We will disintermediate the commonly-used buzzword "compelling". Have you ever wanted to synergize your holistic feature set? With one click? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be customer-directed? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be fractal? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We will harness the term "social-network-based". If you engage magnetically, you may have to synergize wirelessly. We realize that it is better to scale holistically than to transform vertically. We usually facilitate impactful architectures. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think front-end. Think intuitive. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be global, back-end or to be holistic?