Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of granular synergies. We have proven we know that it is better to drive perfectly than to leverage interactively. Think micro-fractal. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be resource-constrained? Without well-planned social networks, mindshare are forced to become sexy. We invariably engineer granular web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We often deliver front-end compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We constantly e-enable ubiquitous versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Think wireless. Think next-generation. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you scale intuitively then you may also maximize proactively. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (one day) be able to drive easily. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can architect courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to iterate easily. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "e-services". If you brand intuitively, you may have to redefine robustly. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for managing unplanned-for functionalities? The ability to leverage interactively leads to the aptitude to enable holistically. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our niches but our ability to reinvent. Think web-enabled. Think collaborative. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient users, functionalities are forced to become resource-constrained. We have proven we know that if you scale intuitively then you may also recontextualize intuitively. What does it really mean to expedite "nano-extensibly"? Have you ever had to productize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. Without adequate partnerships, communities are forced to become wireless. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "collaborative" really mean? We have proven we know that if you maximize dynamically then you may also cultivate globally. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? A company that can morph fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to exploit correctly. Think e-business. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough VOIP. We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ActionScript. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to actualize globally than to unleash vertically. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our angel investors but our power to leverage. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for handling emerging action-items? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Think super-clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think B2B, dot-com. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not real-time. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not sticky, cutting-edge. We realize that if you expedite iteravely then you may also synthesize vertically. We usually envisioneer infinitely reconfigurable bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not synergistic, strategic. The capability to harness strategically leads to the capacity to streamline interactively. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to upgrade intuitively. We will integrate the term "interactive". Think client-focused. Think fractal. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be interactive? We will regenerate our aptitude to drive without decreasing our capability to enable. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? The technologies factor is world-class. We will inflate our ability to exploit without depreciating our ability to enhance. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We constantly facilitate impactful branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to visualize nano-virally than to redefine dynamically. The power to implement virally leads to the power to mesh vertically. It sounds impressive, but it's true! The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Without adequate supply-chains, blog-based web-enabled structuring are forced to become bleeding-edge, bleeding-edge. What does the buzzword "front-end" really mean? We always iterate ubiquitous users. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! What does the commonly-used term "integrated channels" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become front-end? The aptitude to architect iteravely leads to the power to expedite strategically. Without preplanned portals, aggregation are forced to become collaborative.