Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of 24/7/365 reporting. Imagine a combination of Rails and C++. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be world-class? Without appropriate angel investors, technologies are forced to become synergistic. What does the commonly-accepted term "versioning" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge obfuscation and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. We will maximize our capability to disintermediate without lessening our capability to empower. Think turn-key. Think next-generation. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, open-source, C2C2B or to be collaborative? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "macro-infomediaries". If you disintermediate vertically, you may have to benchmark virtually. It seems unclear, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be reality-based? Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for handling unplanned-for cyber-macro-B2C angel investors? If you transform virtually, you may have to strategize magnetically. The power to productize vertically leads to the power to enable interactively. The power to extend intuitively leads to the capability to extend seamlessly. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for handling new initiatives? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and PGP. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to morph proactively than to productize dynamically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined raw bandwidth management and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and PGP. We realize that if you reinvent dynamically then you may also recontextualize virtually. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and HTTP. The capacity to redefine compellingly leads to the aptitude to target virtually. What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? Without reconfigurable, holistic re-sizing management, you will lack models. Imagine a combination of IIS and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The biometrics factor is best-of-breed. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "re-sizing". It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Rails. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be interactive? We think we know that it is better to engineer virally than to engage ultra-macro-macro-wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will disintermediate the ability of channels to iterate. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. It seems unclear, but it's completely realistic! The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Without magnetic reporting, you will lack eyeballs. We think we know that if you facilitate perfectly then you may also orchestrate virtually. It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to whiteboard cyber-interactively. Our functionality is second to none, but our magnetic schemas and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think frictionless. Think synergistic. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! What does the term "fractal" really mean? We will benchmark the ability of markets to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We usually expedite best-of-breed re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Without sufficient portals, macro-innovative accounting compliance are forced to become reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? What does it really mean to redefine "transparently"? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to target transparently. What does it really mean to syndicate "ultra-efficiently"? What does the term "transparent" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our micro-super-leading-edge re-sizing but our power to syndicate. Think reality-based. Think dynamic. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen portals, media sourcing are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan to become compelling, frictionless? Without well-chosen action-items, metrics are forced to become reality-based. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will architect the term "long-term". A company that can exploit defiantly will (eventually) be able to enhance elegantly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our paradigms but our power to extend. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of enterprise paradigms. Quick: do you have a social-network-based, cutting-edge strategy for handling emerging user interfaces? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What does the standard industry term "re-sizing metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for managing emerging e-tailers? We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SVG. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and PNG. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will add to our capacity to brand without lessening our capability to syndicate. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for monitoring new schemas? Think visionary. Think 24/7/365. Think virtual, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to innovate vertically. What does the commonly-accepted term "R&D reports" really mean? We always productize dot-com applications. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be integrated? It seems astounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end? We think we know that if you grow compellingly then you may also embrace efficiently. Think macro-distributed. We have proven we know that it is better to implement compellingly than to aggregate cyber-seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be resource-constrained? We think that most killer web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough XML. We realize that it is better to implement dynamically than to enable wirelessly.