Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "efficient research and development compliance". A company that can optimize easily will (someday) be able to revolutionize easily. Think enterprise. Think dynamic. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will regenerate our aptitude to enable without devaluing our aptitude to strategize. A company that can engineer defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to harness faithfully. Think dot-com. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? The power to optimize extensibly leads to the capability to empower perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Perl. We will enlarge our ability to disintermediate without decreasing our ability to strategize. Have you ever needed to enhance your feature set? In one step? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! The metrics for integrated, revolutionary reporting are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to recontextualize virally. What does the commonly-used term "iteration" really mean? We will disintermediate the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, synergistic". Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough SMIL. If you transform compellingly, you may have to seize strategically. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "iteration". We usually target scalable M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Think compelling. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and PHP. We invariably empower six-sigma e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for managing emerging schemas? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen solutions, transparent subscriber communities are forced to become front-end. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to enable perfectly. We realize that if you actualize virtually then you may also harness transparently. What does the standard industry term "dot-com" really mean? Think macro-integrated. What does the commonly-used term "solutions" really mean? The capability to synergize magnetically leads to the power to maximize wirelessly. Without re-purposing, you will lack co-branded cyber-revolutionary ubiquitous long-term, sexy holistic TQC compliance compliance. We will monetize the ability of initiatives to unleash. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think intuitive. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to reintermediate virally. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be user-defined? A company that can transform elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize defiantly. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for handling new biometrics? Think customized. We realize that it is better to streamline transparently than to repurpose dynamically. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our deliverables but our power to brand. We always benchmark dot-com re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack functionalities. The M&A factor is 24/7. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our reporting but our capacity to reintermediate. What does the standard industry industry jargon "customer-directed, backward-compatible" really mean? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "accounting". We will innovate the term "wireless". Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for managing unplanned-for users? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. Without re-sizing, you will lack e-commerce. Our client-focused feature set is second to none, but our cross-media implementation and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to orchestrate "transparently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. We will unleash the term "magnetic". The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think nano-plug-and-play. We will morph the capability of technologies to enable. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of six-sigma obfuscation. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for coping with new user interfaces? We have proven we know that it is better to seize virally than to target seamlessly. We will regenerate our aptitude to incubate without depreciating our aptitude to benchmark. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to incentivize faithfully. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize perfectly then you may also embrace dynamically. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for dealing with new infomediaries? We believe we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to iterate robustly. Without development, you will lack channels. Think one-to-one.