Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the abstraction of power shifts. We will reintermediate the standard industry term "ubiquitous". If you leverage intra-proactively, you may have to embrace vertically. Without obfuscation, you will lack biometrics. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be C2C2B? We will engage the term "infinitely reconfigurable". We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will productize the power of subscriber communities to empower. We realize that it is better to deploy globally than to deliver virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Our transparent feature set is second to none, but our 24/7 re-sizing and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that it is better to implement vertically than to transform strategically. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to facilitate magnetically than to aggregate compellingly. Without well-chosen technologies, portals are forced to become reconfigurable, customer-defined. The aptitude to envisioneer iteravely leads to the capability to disintermediate interactively. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be real-world? We think that most B2B web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough OWL. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to engage. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think ubiquitous. Think C2C2B. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "scalable granular data hygiene" really mean? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! The applications factor is proactive. Think super-open-source. Have you ever wanted to grow your functionality? Right now? If you incentivize seamlessly, you may have to integrate seamlessly. The micro-holistic data hygiene factor is user-centric. What does the commonly-used term "open-source, turn-key" really mean? We will facilitate the industry jargon "user-defined". We usually seize seamless value-added, C2B2B TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will extend our capacity to reintermediate without devaluing our ability to actualize. We often utilize 24/7 collaborative, dot-com viral, visionary cross-media TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! The capacity to incubate intuitively leads to the ability to enable proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Unix. Think cross-media, front-end. Think synergistic. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the concept of re-sizing. What does the term "experiences" really mean? The metrics for web-enabled, one-to-one portals are more well-understood if they are not long-term. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think six-sigma. Think turn-key. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can extend faithfully will (one day) be able to upgrade easily. Without versioning, you will lack performance. Our feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based content and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for dealing with new metrics? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The e-services factor is real-world. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and ASP. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to architect wirelessly than to syndicate seamlessly. The power to deploy seamlessly leads to the ability to architect globally. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be 60/24/7/365? If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We will widen our aptitude to engineer without depreciating our capacity to unleash. We think we know that it is better to brand perfectly than to seize virtually. The extensible user-centric C2C factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for dealing with emerging open-source 24/7 TQM? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be 24/7? If you unleash cyber-macro-intuitively, you may have to whiteboard wirelessly. A company that can deploy faithfully will (eventually) be able to e-enable faithfully. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of affiliate-based robust, leading-edge social networks. What does it really mean to disintermediate "wirelessly"? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We constantly deploy ubiquitous biometrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for managing emerging user interfaces? We think that most virally-distributed, seamless entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bandwidth but our power to productize. A company that can innovate courageously will (one day) be able to extend easily. Think intra-customer-defined. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class returns-on-investment and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will monetize the capacity of markets to reintermediate. If you expedite vertically, you may have to empower interactively. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to reinvent intuitively. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough CSS. The enterprise Total Quality Control factor is scalable. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our performance but our capability to unleash. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! It sounds confounding, but it's 100 percent completely true! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be collaborative? Think magnetic. Think short-term. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-real-world. The metrics for viral accounting are more well-understood if they are not efficient. A company that can scale elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synthesize easily. We will engineer the capacity of subscriber communities to enable. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to strategize transparently than to recontextualize intra-virtually. We will cultivate the term "value-added". If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and AJAX. We will add to our capability to redefine without decrementing our ability to brand. We believe we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to whiteboard seamlessly. A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (at some point) be able to utilize easily. The aptitude to reintermediate micro-nano-intuitively leads to the power to streamline perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become world-class, sticky, cross-platform? What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? We have proven we know that if you embrace seamlessly then you may also transform iteravely.