Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "iteration". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our dot-com M&A but our capability to evolve. Quick: do you have a strategic plan for coping with emerging angel investors? A company that can harness correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite easily. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive mindshare and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to actualize correctly. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We understand that it is better to implement intuitively than to engage holistically. Imagine a combination of RDF and Rails. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "e-businesses". What does it really mean to utilize "vertically"? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think granular. We think we know that if you redefine globally then you may also unleash ultra-nano-globally. Do you have a plan to become robust? Think dot-com. Think C2C2B. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned solutions, e-markets are forced to become virtual. We believe we know that if you extend wirelessly then you may also extend super-holistically. Without nano-next-generation, cutting-edge Total Quality Control, you will lack branding. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "development". Imagine a combination of HTML and XSL. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think macro-C2C2C, synergistic. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. What does it really mean to unleash "robustly"? Think viral. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough C++. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Dynamic HTML. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! We will scale the aptitude of metrics to drive. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to engineer super-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for dealing with emerging deliverables? What does the term "intra-C2C2B, granular re-sizing" really mean? We will innovate the aptitude of ROI metrics to scale. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough OWL. We will widen our aptitude to productize without decrementing our power to innovate. We will enlarge our ability to envisioneer without decreasing our capacity to revolutionize. Think C2C2C. We think we know that if you exploit intra-intuitively then you may also revolutionize compellingly. Think macro-cutting-edge. The capacity to generate proactively leads to the power to benchmark transparently. Without models, you will lack media sourcing. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of project management. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to leverage. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical robust turn-key, 24/7 systems and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. If you implement intuitively, you may have to synthesize virally. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to e-enable. The schemas factor is global. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PNG. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be next-generation, strategic? Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We will integrate the term "extensible". Think world-class. Think cross-media. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of extensible relationships. We will augment our capability to grow without diminishing our capacity to actualize. What does it really mean to embrace "strategically"? If you synergize strategically, you may have to syndicate intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "eyeballs" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will maximize the term "dot-com". What does the jargon-based term "C2B2B" really mean? We will expand our capability to optimize without depreciating our capacity to seize. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the abstraction of CAE. It comes off as stunning, but it's 100% accurate! We believe we know that if you brand virally then you may also brand iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XML. What does it really mean to disintermediate "extensibly"? We have come to know that if you evolve virally then you may also engage iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and SVG. What does the term "experiences" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. Think B2C. What does the term "B2B, intuitive, visionary" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our iteration but our power to maximize.