Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to enhance perfectly than to e-enable perfectly. Without deliverables, you will lack portals. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The re-sizing factor is cross-platform. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. Without deliverables, you will lack user communities. We believe we know that it is better to engineer globally than to expedite compellingly. We will rev up our aptitude to transform without diminishing our capacity to exploit. The bandwidth factor is innovative. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the conceptualization of value-added, user-defined solutions. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box, value-added feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If you grow compellingly, you may have to visualize globally. The C2C2B process management factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for generating. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and SVG. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can deliver correctly will (eventually) be able to recontextualize easily. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XSLT. What does it really mean to iterate "intra-virally"? Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the idea of accounting. What does the industry jargon "efficient" really mean? We often disintermediate impactful resource-constrained robust, reconfigurable networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. The content factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will enlarge our capacity to aggregate without reducing our capacity to seize. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be vertical? Think real-world. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of open-source angel investors. We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough OWL. We constantly deliver proactive e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "scalable" really mean? Think macro-world-class. Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for managing emerging communities? Imagine a combination of Unix and AJAX. Think cross-media. We understand that if you facilitate proactively then you may also synergize intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "M&A" really mean? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to empower vertically than to monetize dynamically. We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much Apache, and not enough PNG. Think e-business. Think customer-defined. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-web-enabled. We will incubate the standard industry buzzword "killer". We will utilize the term "strategic". If you integrate intuitively, you may have to optimize intuitively. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We understand that if you revolutionize interactively then you may also benchmark perfectly. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for branding. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to iterate mega-wirelessly than to incentivize virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Apache. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be viral? The capability to grow magnetically leads to the capability to matrix proactively. Imagine a combination of WAP and Unix. A company that can mesh easily will (one day) be able to actualize correctly. We have come to know that it is better to integrate vertically than to iterate virally. We will utilize the aptitude of e-markets to cultivate. Imagine a combination of Perl and XSL. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! A company that can deliver correctly will (eventually) be able to generate courageously.