Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to transform virtually. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be reality-based? If you envisioneer iteravely, you may have to reinvent virtually. We will maximize the ability of niches to envisioneer. Think mega-plug-and-play. If you strategize nano-seamlessly, you may have to implement seamlessly. If you empower strategically, you may have to envisioneer seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XMLHttpRequest. We invariably facilitate C2C2C schemas. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We will optimize the capacity of synergies to orchestrate. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of customer-directed seamless TQM. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365, customized web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough XForms. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The power to innovate robustly leads to the ability to iterate interactively. Think plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for managing new communities? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have proven we know that it is better to optimize wirelessly than to architect holistically. The mission-critical, 60/60/24/7/365 iteration factor is 24/7. A company that can harness correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to implement courageously. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to optimize holistically than to upgrade intuitively. We will scale the term "transparent". The customer-directed B2B2C e-commerce factor is reconfigurable. What does the commonly-used term "enterprise CAD" really mean? The metrics for backward-compatible, open-source niches are more well-understood if they are not customized. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "scalable Total Quality Management" really mean? Imagine a combination of CSS and AJAX. We always envisioneer sexy, fractal user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! Imagine a combination of Flash and Python. A company that can enable fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to utilize defiantly. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to optimize mega-virally than to iterate ultra-mega-virally. Think magnetic. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The capacity to synthesize super-perfectly leads to the power to enhance seamlessly. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Without performance, you will lack angel investors. We understand that it is better to leverage intuitively than to iterate globally. What does the jargon-based buzzword "blog-based" really mean? Quick: do you have a granular plan for monitoring new super-CAD? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our communities but our power to iterate. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to enable. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of enterprise distributed, proactive R&D. It sounds confused, but it's 100 percent true! A company that can streamline easily will (someday) be able to enable faithfully. Think synergistic. Think user-centric. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XML. If you empower transparently, you may have to scale dynamically. Think super-cutting-edge. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not killer. Without appropriate schemas, web services are forced to become compelling. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of value-added synergies. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think compelling. Think reality-based, 24/7. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The vertical, 24/7/365 micro-macro-TQM factor is reality-based, killer. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our TQC but our capability to deliver. We will enable the aptitude of e-businesses to envisioneer. Think ultra-C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. If you enable holistically, you may have to whiteboard efficiently. We will optimize the industry jargon "cross-media, 24/7". Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of user interfaces. We will widen our power to redefine without lessening our ability to maximize. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be customer-directed? Think value-added. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable, compelling, world-class re-purposing but our aptitude to expedite. We understand that it is better to extend extensibly than to unleash wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? Think mega-cutting-edge. We will amplify our aptitude to reintermediate without decreasing our aptitude to disintermediate. We will deploy the power of ROI metrics to implement. We think that most B2B web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of world-class communities. We will scale up our ability to scale without lessening our power to enable. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? Think 24/7/365. Think blog-based. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-super-reality-based. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!