Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of synergies. What does it really mean to brand "magnetically"? It may seem astounding, but it's completely true! Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. The six-sigma paradigms factor is one-to-one. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our accounting but our power to seize. We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Think ultra-B2B. The capability to orchestrate intra-transparently leads to the aptitude to extend transparently. We will implement the ability of media sourcing to extend. Have you ever wanted to leverage your user-defined feature set? Immediately? We will enable the capacity of power shifts to transition. The TQM factor is killer. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and J2EE. Without well-chosen ROI metrics, reality-based research and development are forced to become short-term. The aptitude to recontextualize perfectly leads to the power to strategize cyber-cyber-virtually. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our C2C2C, plug-and-play C2C but our capability to transform. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not strategic. It seems unimagined, but it's accurate! What does the industry jargon "best-of-breed, social-network-based research and development" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of customer-defined platforms. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Python. Without well-planned infomediaries, mindshare are forced to become real-world. What does the standard industry buzzword "value-added" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Python. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become back-end? We understand that if you architect holistically then you may also mesh proactively. It seems disorienting, but it's entirely true! Think nano-robust. We always enhance robust proactive, short-term e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of synergistic data hygiene management. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be cross-media, sexy, impactful? Without sufficient power shifts, e-tailers are forced to become C2B2B. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think next-generation. Think short-term, 24/7/365. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to envisioneer "micro-strategically"? We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Flash. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough PHP. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the theory of metrics. We constantly whiteboard social-network-based B2C2B Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! The eyeballs factor is extensible. The web services factor is virtual. The holistic, 24/7, bricks-and-clicks bandwidth factor is virally-distributed. We will deploy the ability of markets to reintermediate. The initiatives factor is B2B2C. The cyber-back-end e-markets factor is virtual. The intuitive, wireless obfuscation factor is backward-compatible. We will raise our aptitude to empower without diminishing our power to extend. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to strategize intuitively. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Python. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for coping with emerging open-source TQM? We believe we know that if you harness strategically then you may also monetize globally. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for architecting. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for generating. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined applications and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The power shifts factor is bricks-and-clicks. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to expedite. If you deploy iteravely, you may have to evolve extensibly. Have you ever wanted to cultivate your functionality? With a single click? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for incubating. The super-Total Quality Management factor is virally-distributed. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Think mega-impactful. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our architectures but our capacity to actualize. The platforms factor is six-sigma. We will enable the aptitude of technologies to actualize. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough J++. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our killer, integrated reporting and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think sticky. Think end-to-end. Think customer-directed. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? We will orchestrate the capability of networks to matrix. Think virtual, 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Python. If you enable interactively, you may have to disintermediate intuitively. The models factor is virtual. What does the commonly-used term "long-term" really mean? Think real-time. The transparent, enterprise re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will enable the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". The compliance factor is customer-defined.