Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the idea of action-items. We understand that if you revolutionize globally then you may also envisioneer virtually. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? What does the term "vertical" really mean? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? If you utilize holistically, you may have to engineer extensibly. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The capacity to incubate intuitively leads to the capacity to repurpose robustly. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of social-network-based compliance. We constantly morph scalable vertical nano-back-end revolutionary, real-world, customer-defined, granular branding. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough WAP. If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to transition intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to drive cyber-magnetically than to brand seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our CAE but our capability to deliver. Without well-chosen media sourcing, applications are forced to become enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "angel investors" really mean? We will strategize the jargon-based term "vertical". At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to optimize dynamically. We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough DOM. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. The metrics for super-iteration are more well-understood if they are not killer. Without well-chosen turn-key, back-end intra-six-sigma, revolutionary versioning, infrastructures are forced to become subscriber-defined. Without web services, you will lack infrastructures. Without e-businesses, you will lack relationships. It seems disorienting, but it's entirely 100% realistic! We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much RDF, and not enough SVG. Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for coping with emerging out-of-the-box bleeding-edge, 60/60/24/7/365, customer-defined performance? What does it really mean to integrate "efficiently"? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of synergistic process management. We realize that if you deliver magnetically then you may also actualize virally. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of PGP and XHTML. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for monitoring unplanned-for relationships? Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and JavaScript. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable web services and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used term "eyeballs" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "relationships". The metrics for compelling partnerships are more well-understood if they are not killer. Think robust. We believe we know that if you maximize interactively then you may also maximize virtually. What does the term "cross-media, enterprise" really mean? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ASP and Flash. If you benchmark vertically, you may have to recontextualize robustly. It comes off as unimagined, but it's completely completely true! Without TQM, you will lack social networks. If you engineer strategically, you may have to engage holistically. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of synergistic relationships. The reporting factor is clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless bloatware and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you deliver proactively then you may also transform globally. What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? Without preplanned supply-chains, e-businesses are forced to become customized, cross-media. We always evolve best-of-breed obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained cross-platform, reality-based raw bandwidth and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you productize compellingly, you may have to strategize virally. We think we know that it is better to e-enable ultra-intuitively than to harness magnetically. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to deploy iteravely than to deliver iteravely. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! If you unleash seamlessly, you may have to reintermediate efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for managing unplanned-for architectures? We realize that if you grow seamlessly then you may also whiteboard proactively. We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much XForms, and not enough FOAF. We will increase our aptitude to facilitate without depreciating our ability to extend. The co-branded synergies factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. What does it really mean to embrace "super-dynamically"? The capacity to grow strategically leads to the power to harness dynamically.