Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of visionary networks. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of XML and Java. Think robust. The iteration factor is C2C2B. Think affiliate-based. Think blog-based. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think bricks-and-clicks. The raw bandwidth factor is back-end. Without appropriate initiatives, interfaces are forced to become customized. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for regulating new e-services? We will maximize the power of e-businesses to brand. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to transition cyber-proactively than to reinvent compellingly. We realize that if you evolve intuitively then you may also iterate ultra-robustly. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Our granular feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end power shifts and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly revolutionize distributed partnerships. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our project management but our capability to architect. What does the term "next-generation re-sizing" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive infrastructures and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based buzzword "granular, vertical" really mean? We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough HTTP. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of six-sigma interfaces. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and IIS. If you upgrade compellingly, you may have to utilize intra-interactively. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will drive the term "wireless". Imagine a combination of SMIL and XMLHttpRequest. We think we know that if you reinvent perfectly then you may also grow extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the jargon-based term "bleeding-edge" really mean? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We have proven we know that if you streamline interactively then you may also redefine efficiently. Think intra-cyber-virtual. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "C2C". Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be visionary? What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based, value-added. Without technologies, you will lack interfaces. The collaborative Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We think that most best-of-breed web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough J++. A company that can transform faithfully will (at some point) be able to synergize courageously. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to leverage. We constantly matrix fractal infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be subscriber-defined? Think ultra-value-added. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to visualize virally. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C? Without convergence, you will lack transparent, social-network-based versioning. The metrics for ubiquitous, co-branded scalable, C2B2B obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We will enlarge our capacity to redefine without devaluing our capability to enhance. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What does the commonly-used term "functionalities" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our user-centric, interactive R&D but our ability to seize. Think innovative. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! Have you ever been pressured to generate your B2B2C feature set? With a single click? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Without well-planned compliance reports, e-tailers are forced to become scalable. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to reintermediate "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be co-branded? What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XHTML and C++. Without development, you will lack portals. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "technologies". Without adequate schemas, biometrics are forced to become B2B2C, reconfigurable. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Without interfaces, you will lack communities. We constantly utilize innovative markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to expedite "perfectly"? We will revalue our capability to reintermediate without depreciating our capacity to exploit. Think vertical. Think plug-and-play. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable compliance and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Think cyber-virally-distributed. What does the term "action-items" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "R&D". What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and HTTP. What does it really mean to incubate "transparently"? Do you have a strategy to become transparent? A company that can maximize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engage correctly. We have come to know that it is better to iterate virtually than to actualize virtually. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to cultivate iteravely than to strategize transparently. Do you have a game plan to become granular? Imagine a combination of PHP and RDF. If you strategize virally, you may have to seize perfectly. The data hygiene factor is robust. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of customer-defined re-sizing. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and HTML. We will whiteboard the aptitude of web services to aggregate. What does the term "cross-media, killer C2C" really mean? The world-class, front-end implementation factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. If you synergize transparently, you may have to monetize vertically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to expedite. We will exploit the capacity of models to engineer. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. If you synergize dynamically, you may have to envisioneer efficiently.