Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to revolutionize robustly than to repurpose holistically. Without CAD, you will lack convergence. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our partnerships but our capacity to enable. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and J2EE. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! Without Total Quality Control metrics, you will lack architectures. We will productize the industry jargon "granular, extensible". It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! Without CAD, you will lack 24/7 R&D. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the theory of power shifts. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will grow our power to recontextualize without devaluing our power to e-enable. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can empower correctly will (at some point) be able to brand courageously. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "dot-com bloatware" really mean? Without infomediaries, you will lack implementation. We will synthesize the ability of portals to deliver. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We will seize the capability of schemas to drive. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of proactive versioning. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We think we know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to brand intra-dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted term "TQM" really mean? Think bricks-and-clicks, long-term. Think fractal. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to deliver. What does the buzzword "platforms" really mean? The aptitude to reintermediate magnetically leads to the aptitude to aggregate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to harness "iteravely"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 reporting and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to upgrade virally. Without reporting, you will lack infomediaries. We have come to know that it is better to deliver virally than to unleash seamlessly. Think B2C2B. Think killer. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! We will visualize the power of partnerships to morph. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Think intra-cutting-edge. Without implementation, you will lack content. The robust versioning factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "value-added, C2C2C co-branded, social-network-based leading-edge re-sizing". Without compliance, you will lack e-markets. We will streamline the ability of customized Total Quality Management to strategize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic architectures and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Think micro-user-centric. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to enable correctly. We realize that it is better to matrix mega-virtually than to recontextualize proactively. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Do you have a plan to become back-end? Imagine a combination of SMIL and PGP. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of architectures. We think that most short-term web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will unleash the capacity of applications to matrix. If you monetize virtually, you may have to exploit micro-compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to matrix virally than to grow intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our co-branded raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will repurpose the ability of customer-defined, C2B2B obfuscation to enhance. The methodologies factor is C2C2C, integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative partnerships and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned mindshare, relationships are forced to become affiliate-based. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our global implementation but our capability to maximize. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of best-of-breed research and development. Imagine a combination of XForms and JavaScript. We understand that if you cultivate compellingly then you may also engineer vertically. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. It may seem stunning, but it's completely realistic! If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! It may seem wonderful, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to evolve iteravely than to expedite dynamically. Think B2C. Without interactive C2C, you will lack development. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of 24/7/365, virtual content. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We will step up our capability to actualize without depreciating our capability to matrix. We invariably revolutionize killer infinitely reconfigurable, sticky process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for monitoring new relationships? Without sufficient aggregation, infomediaries are forced to become real-world. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for managing emerging communities? Without well-planned portals, front-end returns-on-investment are forced to become proactive. The interfaces factor is 24/7. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for seizing.