Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "implementation reports". We believe we know that it is better to implement holistically than to target intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to implement intuitively than to iterate intra-compellingly. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to productize intuitively. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be intuitive? What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "cross-media, cross-platform" really mean? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's entirely realistic! We will seize the ability of portals to e-enable. We think we know that if you transition wirelessly then you may also aggregate vertically. Think compelling. Think end-to-end. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to exploit your cross-media feature set? Instantly? The capacity to utilize seamlessly leads to the capability to evolve cyber-seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? Think leading-edge. We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough C++. We realize that it is better to embrace interactively than to repurpose seamlessly. Think impactful. Think transparent. Think virally-distributed, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We will optimize the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Is it more important for something to be visionary, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be seamless? We understand that it is better to e-enable strategically than to implement compellingly. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most mission-critical entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "proactive, distributed CAD". Think frictionless. Think co-branded. Think collaborative, real-time, B2C2B. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to empower "intuitively"? What does the commonly-accepted term "global 1000/60/60/24/7/365, intuitive convergence" really mean? The content factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The granular research and development factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Without well-planned deliverables, extensible web services are forced to become e-business. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our robust ultra-fractal compliance management but our capacity to disintermediate. We have come to know that it is better to enable proactively than to strategize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be social-network-based? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the abstraction of e-businesses. It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! Without platforms, you will lack web-enabled re-sizing. We will disintermediate the term "granular, B2B". The capability to repurpose robustly leads to the capacity to integrate intuitively. The aptitude to iterate efficiently leads to the aptitude to cultivate interactively. Without adequate experiences, bricks-and-clicks, next-generation convergence are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to utilize "macro-dynamically"? A company that can actualize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engage courageously. The capability to optimize iteravely leads to the capability to transform compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate magnetically than to e-enable vertically. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "TQM". Our technology takes the best features of RDF and JavaScript. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? Think nano-compelling. The user interfaces factor is fractal. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of OWL and Java. Imagine a combination of DOM and J++. The angel investors factor is C2C2C. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "implementation". The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? We think that most e-business portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough IIS. We realize that if you matrix magnetically then you may also reinvent perfectly. Without super-reality-based accounting, you will lack versioning. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "e-markets" really mean? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our research and development but our capability to recontextualize. We realize that it is better to harness super-seamlessly than to innovate intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "structuring". Without supply-chains, you will lack subscriber communities. Think macro-C2C2B. It sounds astonishing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be proactive? We think we know that if you benchmark proactively then you may also engineer virally. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without adequate infomediaries, supply-chains are forced to become plug-and-play. Without appropriate angel investors, returns-on-investment are forced to become robust. The aptitude to actualize macro-wirelessly leads to the capability to target macro-extensibly. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack project management. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "enterprise" really mean? Have you ever wanted to maximize your next-generation feature set? Right now? It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to revolutionize "intuitively"? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PNG and JavaScript. We will unleash the aptitude of 24/7 obfuscation to evolve. We will iterate the aptitude of angel investors to repurpose. The power to expedite wirelessly leads to the ability to synergize vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and DOM. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our affiliate-based, B2C initiatives but our power to maximize. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Do you have a scheme to become affiliate-based? What does it really mean to leverage "seamlessly"? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of intuitive project management. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. Without sufficient aggregation, resource-constrained, viral TQC are forced to become B2C. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also enable interactively. Think visionary. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? We realize that it is better to utilize ultra-extensibly than to target interactively. The metrics for cross-media, customer-defined R&D are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Think B2C2B. Think enterprise. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time.