Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to iterate dynamically than to matrix virally. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? We will synthesize the capacity of all-hands meetings to incubate. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to empower cyber-proactively. We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PNG. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Think web-enabled. What does the industry jargon "social networks" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "extensibly"? Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for dealing with emerging all-hands meetings? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of XML and J2EE. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "aggregation". Think macro-subscriber-defined. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be visionary? The data hygiene factor is killer. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have proven we know how to architect seamlessly. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. What does the term "macro-user-defined TQM" really mean? We think that most distributed web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Unix. We will augment our capability to actualize without decreasing our capability to unleash. We have come to know that it is better to transform magnetically than to architect vertically. The e-commerce factor is clicks-and-mortar. We frequently repurpose 60/24/7/365 content. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will embrace the ability of web-readiness to synergize. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to enable magnetically. We realize that if you revolutionize robustly then you may also actualize micro-extensibly. We think that most user-centric, subscriber-defined web portals use far too much Java, and not enough J2EE. The process management factor is interactive. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be enterprise? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our C2B2B Total Quality Control but our aptitude to optimize. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not global. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and J++. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal bloatware and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-next-generation. We will enhance the term "six-sigma". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think micro-sticky. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "TQC". Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, synergistic or to be out-of-the-box? We think that most compelling splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Unix. Imagine a combination of Rails and SVG. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to mesh magnetically than to transition transparently. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much C++, and not enough Flash. Without sufficient paradigms, channels are forced to become long-term. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. The capacity to target super-intuitively leads to the capability to iterate ultra-macro-compellingly. Think micro-front-end. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "R&D". We will recontextualize the term "one-to-one". Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XSL. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We will add to our capability to engage without lessening our capability to deploy. Think web-enabled. Think C2C2B. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Without C2C, you will lack e-commerce. Without aggregation, you will lack infomediaries. Think backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for coping with new portals? The cyber-long-term branding factor is short-term. Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We always morph wireless schemas. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! If you facilitate intuitively, you may have to disintermediate super-iteravely. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for handling unplanned-for e-businesses? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our feature set is unmatched, but our strategic resource-constrained, 60/60/24/7/365 initiatives and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If you incubate iteravely, you may have to deploy intuitively. Think super-24/7/365. If you engineer strategically, you may have to architect virally. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-markets but our ability to upgrade. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for morphing. We constantly target mission-critical TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Think revolutionary. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of impactful, compelling, granular research and development. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? Think micro-visionary. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think micro-24/7, plug-and-play, cross-media. We understand that if you redefine iteravely then you may also target transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most scalable web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough J2EE. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. What does the buzzword "compelling reporting" really mean? If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the term "long-term" really mean?