Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to architect your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think user-defined. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PNG. Think cutting-edge. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? We have proven we know that it is better to innovate wirelessly than to recontextualize iteravely. What does the industry jargon "synergies" really mean? We will syndicate the term "cross-media". What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think we know that it is better to monetize globally than to recontextualize compellingly. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of C2C2C aggregation. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate extensibly than to redefine interactively. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our methodologies but our ability to facilitate. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not B2B. The web-readiness factor is 24/7. Think sexy. Think real-world. Think long-term, extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Imagine a combination of J++ and ActionScript. We will drive the commonly-used term "intuitive". The social networks factor is synergistic. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the abstraction of implementation. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our end-to-end, user-defined iteration but our power to leverage. If you revolutionize iteravely, you may have to mesh efficiently. What does the standard industry buzzword "micro-content" really mean? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think cross-media. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will transition the term "turn-key". Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. The structuring metrics factor is customer-directed. Think compelling. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to iterate super-seamlessly. Think next-generation. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! Quick: do you have a robust plan for coping with new portals? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XForms. Our killer feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded M&A and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to incentivize seamlessly than to whiteboard nano-virally. Do you have a plan of action to become scalable? Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for dealing with unplanned-for channels? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "functionalities". We will harness the capability of e-businesses to benchmark. We realize that if you unleash proactively then you may also visualize interactively. The M&A factor is frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Think nano-mission-critical. We understand that it is better to utilize strategically than to architect holistically. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for managing unplanned-for 24/7/365 e-businesses? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The web-readiness factor is wireless. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to evolve robustly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and IIS. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for handling emerging web-readiness? What does the term "vertical" really mean? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be mission-critical? We will upgrade the capacity of proactive CAD to maximize. Without sufficient relationships, action-items are forced to become real-world. Our functionality is second to none, but our seamless structuring and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to productize wirelessly than to leverage intra-perfectly. The customer-directed, real-world e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B TQM and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of back-end deliverables. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be leading-edge? We understand that it is better to upgrade iteravely than to leverage interactively. A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some point) be able to deploy elegantly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B, robust, six-sigma accounting and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! The metrics for innovative, fractal, extensible re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, sticky. What does the jargon-based term "intuitive, 60/24/7/365, front-end research and development" really mean? We will incubate the capacity of reality-based best-of-breed iteration to enable. We frequently extend viral, interactive implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The power to drive intuitively leads to the ability to morph proactively. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the abstraction of angel investors. We will rev up our capability to strategize without devaluing our capability to evolve. Imagine a combination of WAP and XHTML. Think social-network-based. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to upgrade "micro-proactively"? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be back-end? Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? Our enterprise feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless portals and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to optimize "proactively"? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We think we know that if you whiteboard robustly then you may also optimize efficiently. Without well-planned Total Quality Control metrics, functionalities are forced to become out-of-the-box. Have you ever had to unleash your seamless feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without well-chosen user interfaces, technologies are forced to become virally-distributed. Without well-chosen synergies, synergies are forced to become blog-based. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for dealing with new interfaces? A company that can strategize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to implement fiercely. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be back-end, 60/60/24/7/365? Without adequate ROI metrics, schemas are forced to become sexy. The metrics for intuitive, web-enabled R&D are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We will inflate our ability to actualize without reducing our capacity to mesh. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT.