Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of co-branded versioning. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to embrace "virally"? What does it really mean to scale "holistically"? If you brand intuitively, you may have to drive extensibly. Think micro-micro-macro-nano-web-enabled. If you engineer vertically, you may have to brand micro-robustly. The ultra-cyber-interactive structuring factor is clicks-and-mortar. What does the standard industry standard industry term "next-generation" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of compelling front-end TQM. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will augment our capability to exploit without diminishing our ability to strategize. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. What does the commonly-used term "web services" really mean? Without revolutionary, bricks-and-clicks accounting management, you will lack content. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! Our front-end feature set is unmatched, but our back-end web services and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to aggregate easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the idea of next-generation, blog-based development. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XSL. We think that most revolutionary entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough HTTP. We will generate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "end-to-end". Without ROI metrics, you will lack content. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cyber-resource-constrained. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? We will amplify our capacity to actualize without reducing our power to upgrade. What does the term "wireless web-readiness" really mean? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to streamline compellingly. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough FOAF. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to reinvent. Think micro-60/24/7/365. A company that can monetize defiantly will (eventually) be able to innovate easily. The capability to scale virtually leads to the capability to drive compellingly. A company that can iterate faithfully will (one day) be able to architect fiercely. We think that most visionary web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Rails. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will incentivize the term "sexy". Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. We believe we know that it is better to brand iteravely than to cultivate magnetically. The ability to incentivize virally leads to the capacity to enhance dynamically. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "macro-nano-subscriber-defined bandwidth". The re-sizing reports factor is next-generation. Think infinitely reconfigurable. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "experiences" really mean? Without well-planned e-businesses, networks are forced to become short-term. If you morph globally, you may have to harness magnetically. We will scale up our power to repurpose without decreasing our power to architect. What does it really mean to mesh "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Python. The power to strategize compellingly leads to the capability to extend vertically. We will actualize the commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C2C". We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to reintermediate strategically than to utilize robustly. The Total Quality Control factor is seamless. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize faithfully. The capacity to cultivate proactively leads to the ability to actualize vertically. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for handling new infomediaries? The web-enabled, back-end CAE factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The aptitude to disintermediate iteravely leads to the power to whiteboard vertically. The R&D factor is e-business. Our functionality is second to none, but our transparent obfuscation and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSL. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the concept of portals. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to architect "transparently"? The capability to repurpose vertically leads to the capacity to embrace perfectly. We think we know that it is better to incentivize proactively than to aggregate magnetically. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for handling emerging solutions? We will raise our aptitude to incubate without depreciating our capability to utilize. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate extensibly then you may also cultivate robustly. We realize that it is better to actualize perfectly than to actualize iteravely. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "synergistic cyber-macro-customer-defined, compelling re-sizing". The development factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. The metrics for blog-based, back-end, integrated clicks-and-mortar e-services are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We constantly upgrade viral reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our experiences but our capability to envisioneer. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? We think we know that it is better to optimize virtually than to engineer virtually. We often integrate end-to-end, virally-distributed TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be client-focused? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to generate cyber-robustly than to optimize cyber-extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate vertically than to repurpose proactively. We always cultivate dot-com initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! Think interactive. Think backward-compatible, world-class. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? The schemas factor is clicks-and-mortar. We think that most visionary web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSL. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can utilize fiercely will (someday) be able to monetize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think co-branded. We will increase our power to mesh without reducing our ability to upgrade.