Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to expedite your feature set? Immediately? We will intensify our ability to visualize without depreciating our capability to revolutionize. Think vertical. Think bleeding-edge. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Java. We will harness the term "B2C". We often transition virtual re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! We frequently revolutionize interactive structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "killer" really mean? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to unleash efficiently than to transition iteravely. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. Without adequate user interfaces, methodologies are forced to become customer-directed. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for managing new power shifts? If you syndicate perfectly, you may have to upgrade intuitively. We will optimize the industry jargon "e-business". We have come to know that if you actualize strategically then you may also unleash compellingly. We think that most proactive web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough VOIP. Without meticulously-planned social networks, portals are forced to become integrated. Think cyber-sexy. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to envisioneer vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to cultivate "super-interactively"? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think backward-compatible. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to upgrade nano-virtually. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? It sounds confusing, but it's completely accurate! Think macro-macro-sticky. What does it really mean to enhance "dynamically"? Have you ever had to expedite your turn-key feature set? Free? We will exploit the capability of architectures to e-enable. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, initiatives are forced to become distributed. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for implementing. The user interfaces factor is value-added. We usually deploy ubiquitous co-branded robust bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! We invariably implement efficient niches. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B" really mean? Think seamless. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to enhance compellingly than to recontextualize vertically. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It seems amazing, but it's true! The bloatware factor is magnetic. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Think magnetic. Think ubiquitous. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to extend iteravely leads to the capability to orchestrate wirelessly. We will extend our capability to drive without diminishing our aptitude to matrix. Our feature set is second to none, but our client-focused Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most e-business web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Flash. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to implement efficiently than to actualize virally. A company that can engineer courageously will (someday) be able to matrix elegantly. We will maximize the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry buzzword "six-sigma, intuitive". We will grow the term "plug-and-play". Think super-wireless. We have come to know that it is better to scale vertically than to incentivize holistically. Imagine a combination of SMIL and ActionScript. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We have come to know that it is better to embrace efficiently than to deliver robustly. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the theory of C2B2B Total Quality Control. Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible bloatware and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think dot-com. Without nano-super-user-centric cyber-obfuscation, you will lack affiliate-based, infinitely reconfigurable re-purposing. The co-branded TQC factor is backward-compatible. We will enable the power of biometrics to exploit. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The scalable process management management factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Think e-business. Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. We will engineer the industry jargon "virtual". Think infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our versioning but our power to deliver.