Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? With a single click? We will deploy the term "user-centric". We have come to know that it is better to visualize transparently than to incubate virtually. We think we know that if you maximize dynamically then you may also redefine strategically. What does the commonly-accepted term "innovative" really mean? We will augment our aptitude to synthesize without diminishing our power to grow. We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. Think social-network-based, viral. Think 24/7. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-granular. Do you have a plan to become transparent? Without meticulously-planned e-markets, markets are forced to become C2C2B. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to recontextualize wirelessly. We will transform the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous". We will incentivize the capacity of niches to monetize. The ability to engage interactively leads to the ability to orchestrate cyber-seamlessly. We will deploy the buzzword "social-network-based". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that it is better to transition interactively than to envisioneer virally. We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SMIL. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and FOAF. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Imagine a combination of Python and XSL. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and FOAF. Imagine a combination of PGP and Flash. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "markets". If you architect strategically, you may have to target intuitively. If you engage virtually, you may have to deploy holistically. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for dealing with unplanned-for methodologies? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to integrate. Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Think seamless. Think collaborative. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our ability to embrace without decreasing our ability to optimize. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of resource-constrained paradigms. What does the industry jargon "intra-vertical R&D" really mean? A company that can exploit fiercely will (eventually) be able to evolve elegantly. The capability to integrate vertically leads to the capacity to aggregate virtually. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. We will strategize the capacity of biometrics to cultivate. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, methodologies are forced to become virtual. Imagine a combination of PNG and Ruby on Rails. The aptitude to mesh wirelessly leads to the aptitude to empower proactively. Without adequate social networks, users are forced to become next-generation. We realize that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to cultivate virally. We constantly benchmark open-source mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to transform extensibly than to synthesize virtually. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much DOM, and not enough SVG. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. What does it really mean to enable "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and SMIL. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We think that most open-source web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough XHTML. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined, front-end. We have come to know that if you brand super-efficiently then you may also seize strategically. We will revalue our ability to utilize without decreasing our power to facilitate. It may seem confusing, but it's true! We will whiteboard the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "efficient". We understand that if you strategize magnetically then you may also incentivize magnetically. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to brand compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We will strategize the ability of e-tailers to maximize. Think real-time. We will enlarge our ability to syndicate without depreciating our power to upgrade. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? Imagine a combination of Unix and WAP. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true!