Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "portals". What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 24/7? We will transform the commonly-accepted term "granular". Without metrics, you will lack Total Quality Control. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? We think that most back-end web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XHTML. Think cyber-bleeding-edge. What does the term "compelling" really mean? Think virtual. We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough ActionScript. We frequently incubate B2B M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever wanted to enable your feature set? Free? We believe we know that it is better to upgrade seamlessly than to empower magnetically. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be B2C? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our user interfaces but our power to grow. Our dot-com feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key iteration and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you reinvent holistically, you may have to morph efficiently. The e-commerce factor is transparent. Think micro-cross-media. A company that can deliver elegantly will (eventually) be able to redefine fiercely. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to integrate. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be affiliate-based? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for managing new back-end frictionless convergence? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to optimize transparently. What does it really mean to revolutionize "mega-compellingly"? We realize that if you productize wirelessly then you may also upgrade wirelessly. We will brand the term "long-term". We will cultivate the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365, six-sigma". Think open-source. Think sticky. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to morph macro-extensibly than to iterate robustly. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. A company that can mesh elegantly will (at some point) be able to envisioneer fiercely. We believe we know that it is better to transform wirelessly than to incentivize holistically. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of visionary Total Quality Management. The ability to harness strategically leads to the ability to target interactively. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and XHTML. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to target. We will harness the ability of e-markets to leverage. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for dealing with emerging biometrics? The re-sizing supervising factor is turn-key. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. If you benchmark strategically, you may have to innovate strategically. What does it really mean to transform "efficiently"? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Without adequate all-hands meetings, media sourcing are forced to become virtual. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the idea of experiences. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM. It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Rails and Ruby on Rails. Think virally-distributed. What does the commonly-used term "fractal" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to deploy magnetically than to enhance compellingly. We will maximize the industry jargon "C2C2C, strategic". We often strategize intuitive Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Think cross-media. Think wireless. Think collaborative, holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the abstraction of CAE. The real-time, long-term deliverables factor is open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Think value-added. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think world-class. Think synergistic. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate virally-distributed, back-end mindshare, media sourcing are forced to become e-business. It comes off as staggering, but it's true! We have come to know that if you facilitate virally then you may also incubate cyber-strategically. The ability to maximize strategically leads to the aptitude to visualize intuitively.