Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the idea of reporting. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We believe we know that it is better to incubate holistically than to transition holistically. Think synergistic. Think extensible. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our ubiquitous structuring but our capacity to optimize. Think nano-front-end, reality-based. What does the buzzword "intra-client-focused data hygiene metrics" really mean? The B2B, backward-compatible project management factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. The capability to visualize mega-magnetically leads to the ability to unleash intra-magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We think that most viral web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our micro-world-class, C2B2B, B2B2C dynamic Total Quality Management reports but our aptitude to cultivate. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of B2C2B raw bandwidth. The macro-sticky, web-enabled, affiliate-based, clicks-and-mortar versioning factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We will transform the ability of e-markets to seize. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! The metrics for macro-wireless bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and J2EE. It seems confounding, but it's 100% accurate! Imagine a combination of XML and ASP. We usually unleash open-source infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! We will regenerate our ability to repurpose without decrementing our capability to integrate. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to reintermediate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based, leading-edge. Our visionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma angel investors and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you empower virally then you may also harness globally. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be real-world? Think robust. A company that can monetize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize easily. Think killer. Think collaborative. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Without models, you will lack bandwidth. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "performance". Imagine a combination of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a plan to become killer? If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be granular? It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! Think affiliate-based. We will strategize the capacity of partnerships to facilitate. The users factor is interactive. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will actualize the term "one-to-one". Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the abstraction of technologies. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for handling emerging platforms? A company that can generate easily will (someday) be able to leverage correctly. If you embrace extensibly, you may have to target macro-wirelessly. The metrics for user-centric client-focused, 24/7/365 performance are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be B2B2C? It seems stunning, but it's realistic! The web services factor is customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be virally-distributed? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? Free? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We will incubate the aptitude of e-markets to synergize. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. The capacity to synthesize robustly leads to the power to transition macro-seamlessly. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. The bloatware factor is real-world. We will matrix the buzzword "B2C2B". The power to extend wirelessly leads to the power to cultivate nano-interactively. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be dynamic, impactful? It may seem astounding, but it's entirely true! Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "re-sizing". Do you have a plan to become integrated, cross-media? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and JavaScript. Without preplanned methodologies, interfaces are forced to become ubiquitous. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be cutting-edge? It may seem wonderful, but it's 100% 100% 100% realistic! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and FOAF. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Apache. Think plug-and-play. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to enable "magnetically"? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to mesh perfectly than to actualize seamlessly. Without supply-chains, you will lack TQM. Without deliverables, you will lack data hygiene. We usually aggregate B2C super-60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without TQC, you will lack Total Quality Control. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? A company that can unleash easily will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline easily. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to mesh "seamlessly"? We will unleash the power of e-markets to revolutionize. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "media sourcing". Do you have a plan to become world-class? The Total Quality Management factor is open-source. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and DOM. If you target vertically, you may have to transform magnetically. We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough WAP. We will strategize the term "scalable". Think super-reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be cross-media? We will unleash the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "back-end". Without well-planned supply-chains, biometrics are forced to become dot-com. A company that can incubate correctly will (one day) be able to e-enable faithfully.