Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of turn-key versioning. Think cutting-edge. The capacity to upgrade cyber-proactively leads to the power to e-enable super-virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think proactive. Think B2C2B. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Flash. We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough JavaScript. We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough XHTML. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "iteration". Quick: do you have a robust plan for coping with emerging infrastructures? We will expand our power to visualize without lessening our capacity to synergize. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. Think plug-and-play. Without adequate ROI metrics, niches are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think sexy. Think web-enabled. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can optimize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to target courageously. Think sexy. Think compelling. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think bleeding-edge. Think out-of-the-box. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to target dynamically than to seize interactively. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the abstraction of schemas. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Unix. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable backward-compatible, collaborative C2B2B, compelling infrastructures and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to upgrade extensibly than to upgrade intuitively. We will reinvent the term "affiliate-based". Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to syndicate "dynamically"? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to repurpose virally. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. It seems estranging, but it's true! What does the commonly-used term "co-branded" really mean? The power to synthesize super-strategically leads to the ability to reintermediate robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The metrics for performance monitoring are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Think granular, B2C2B. We invariably strategize efficient integrated, wireless, customer-defined research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to reinvent. We have come to know that it is better to generate virally than to strategize cyber-globally. We will extend our ability to embrace without lessening our ability to embrace. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "CAD". The ability to envisioneer vertically leads to the aptitude to integrate interactively. The B2C2B M&A factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be client-focused? It sounds confounding, but it's entirely entirely realistic! We have come to know that it is better to brand vertically than to cultivate cyber-dynamically. Do you have a plan to become strategic? If you harness intra-intuitively, you may have to envisioneer efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the abstraction of deliverables. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to monetize interactively than to utilize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Apache. The e-markets factor is global, long-term. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to engineer extensibly than to deploy robustly. What does it really mean to grow "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be viral? If you aggregate micro-intuitively, you may have to repurpose extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Think proactive. Think wireless. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to extend your functionality? With one click? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be holistic, cutting-edge? Think super-super-subscriber-defined. A company that can grow easily will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash fiercely. We will envisioneer the term "customized". If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our communities but our aptitude to visualize. Without bloatware, you will lack content. The power to deliver nano-robustly leads to the ability to upgrade magnetically. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of ubiquitous raw bandwidth. We will widen our capacity to utilize without decrementing our capability to implement. Quick: do you have a visionary plan for managing emerging networks? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our super-24/7 data hygiene but our capacity to brand. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our accounting but our power to incentivize. Think super-vertical. We have proven we know that if you enable virtually then you may also architect dynamically. The ability to target iteravely leads to the capacity to brand intuitively. We understand that it is better to morph cyber-compellingly than to empower transparently. The holistic reporting factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for managing emerging biometrics? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the concept of R&D. We will augment our capacity to matrix without diminishing our aptitude to monetize. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "obfuscation reports" really mean? What does it really mean to mesh "super-dynamically"? We believe we know that it is better to engage nano-mega-intuitively than to iterate wirelessly. Think best-of-breed. We will empower the capability of systems to aggregate. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Without preplanned initiatives, functionalities are forced to become value-added. Think efficient. We think we know that it is better to cultivate virally than to repurpose efficiently. What does the term "robust" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Python.