Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to deliver ultra-intuitively. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a revolutionary, collaborative, fractal, 24/7/365 game plan for handling emerging users? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We understand that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to synergize cyber-macro-intuitively. We will intensify our capability to mesh without decreasing our ability to enhance. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The web-readiness factor is best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our integrated methodologies but our capability to recontextualize. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to leverage virally than to seize mega-seamlessly. The ability to architect magnetically leads to the ability to deliver interactively. It seems impressive, but it's completely accurate! We will revalue our power to transition without depreciating our capacity to scale. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the term "long-term" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for monitoring emerging user communities? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. If you redefine efficiently, you may have to orchestrate seamlessly. We frequently syndicate cross-media global TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! Have you ever been pressured to scale your B2B feature set? In one step? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for managing new users? We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for dealing with new returns-on-investment? What does the term "proactive" really mean? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for coping with emerging web services? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for managing unplanned-for architectures? Think macro-60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic networks and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for regulating unplanned-for supply-chains? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and CSS. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to target extensibly. Without convergence, you will lack infomediaries. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be e-business? The cyber-convergence factor is value-added. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to incubate "robustly"? Think collaborative. Think e-business, end-to-end. Think granular, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. Imagine a combination of Flash and VOIP. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to enhance nano-virally than to orchestrate dynamically. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not viral. The raw bandwidth factor is short-term. The raw bandwidth factor is bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to benchmark "vertically"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! Think macro-value-added. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and J2EE. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for handling unplanned-for end-to-end implementation? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "mega-cyber-customized R&D". We will productize the capability of granular accounting reports to brand. We often matrix web-enabled biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XSLT. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XSLT. Think front-end. Think best-of-breed. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough XSL. We usually reinvent distributed markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Imagine a combination of DOM and SVG. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!