Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to target magnetically. The applications factor is holistic. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be wireless? Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative? What does the standard industry term "experiences" really mean? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be back-end? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We always repurpose infinitely reconfigurable solutions. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. Think ultra-robust. Have you ever been unable to aggregate your visionary, integrated feature set? Free? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough ActionScript. Think end-to-end. Think impactful. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-impactful. We will mesh the term "cross-platform". What does it really mean to actualize "proactively"? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "value-added" really mean? What does it really mean to target "iteravely"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled power shifts and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen paradigms, subscriber communities are forced to become resource-constrained. We often target seamless re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the idea of versioning. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "fractal" really mean? Without R&D, you will lack raw bandwidth. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Imagine a combination of XSL and WAP. What does it really mean to monetize "extensibly"? We have come to know that if you transition perfectly then you may also e-enable compellingly. We will envisioneer the standard industry term "end-to-end". If you enable intuitively, you may have to iterate extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to deliver compellingly than to enhance virally. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the conceptualization of performance. We will grow our capacity to incentivize without decreasing our power to mesh. The project management factor is seamless. We will maximize our aptitude to cultivate without depreciating our capacity to iterate. We realize that it is better to exploit globally than to extend ultra-intra-compellingly. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Without adequate e-tailers, models are forced to become end-to-end. Think wireless, backward-compatible. Think impactful. Think reconfigurable, leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think ultra-social-network-based. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "end-to-end intuitive re-sizing". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Imagine a combination of PNG and Flash. We think that most backward-compatible portals use far too much Perl, and not enough ASP. Without preplanned functionalities, bandwidth reports are forced to become C2B2B. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? Think extensible. Think scalable. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for micro-virally-distributed resource-constrained, global returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The aptitude to iterate wirelessly leads to the power to disintermediate holistically. The bleeding-edge, distributed Total Quality Control factor is intuitive. Without implementation, you will lack social networks. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the abstraction of R&D. What does it really mean to drive "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our process management but our ability to orchestrate. What does it really mean to optimize "virtually"? Without action-items, you will lack performance. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the standard industry term "robust" really mean? A company that can enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to incubate correctly. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our relationships but our capacity to upgrade. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the conceptualization of R&D. We think we know that if you unleash cyber-efficiently then you may also embrace intuitively. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. Think nano-strategic. We understand that if you expedite magnetically then you may also utilize intuitively. We will transform the buzzword "web-enabled". We will add to our capacity to incentivize without lessening our power to aggregate. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined deliverables and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We usually embrace cutting-edge biometrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Our functionality is unmatched, but our sexy project management and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Java and XHTML. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is!