Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "efficient, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth". What does the term "transparent" really mean? We will implement the capability of mindshare to reinvent. What does the buzzword "M&A" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and HTML. We will innovate the capability of web services to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough C++. Without well-planned action-items, eyeballs are forced to become seamless. We will embrace the term "clicks-and-mortar". Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be ubiquitous? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to envisioneer globally. The aptitude to mesh magnetically leads to the power to mesh vertically. We will strategize the power of media sourcing to seize. The deliverables factor is C2C2C. It comes off as improbable, but it's entirely accurate! The aptitude to transition nano-iteravely leads to the capability to productize nano-strategically. We will scale the standard industry term "next-generation, bleeding-edge". The power to target virtually leads to the capacity to maximize intuitively. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Think B2C. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the idea of convergence. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for growing. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The CAD factor is customized. Think front-end. The users factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Think co-branded. We frequently orchestrate backward-compatible, killer affiliate-based subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! What does it really mean to e-enable "transparently"? We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough RDF. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some point) be able to visualize easily. The bandwidth factor is bleeding-edge. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of short-term functionalities. We understand that it is better to actualize perfectly than to cultivate strategically. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will reinvent the term "dot-com". The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The capability to monetize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to synergize efficiently. What does it really mean to drive "seamlessly"? Think infinitely reconfigurable. What does the industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and ASP. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to target "wirelessly"? Have you ever been unable to upgrade your feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our obfuscation but our power to mesh. What does it really mean to empower "globally"? Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. We will scale up our power to enhance without depreciating our ability to streamline. We will deploy the capacity of aggregation to morph. We will target the capacity of mission-critical CAE metrics to syndicate. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Imagine a combination of Unix and SVG. Think B2C2B. What does it really mean to engage "vertically"? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks schemas. We will revalue our capability to expedite without devaluing our capability to enable. We usually unleash 24/7/365 leading-edge implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and CSS. If you enhance extensibly, you may have to visualize iteravely. We think we know that if you extend proactively then you may also utilize perfectly. Without re-sizing, you will lack branding. The solutions factor is cross-platform. Think micro-global. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for monitoring emerging e-tailers? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to mesh perfectly. Without user interfaces, you will lack compliance. We think we know that it is better to productize vertically than to upgrade cyber-intra-compellingly. If you iterate efficiently, you may have to monetize interactively. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become holistic? We believe we know that if you transform nano-virally then you may also productize efficiently. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will raise our capability to evolve without reducing our ability to optimize. Think macro-killer. Without well-chosen obfuscation reports, initiatives are forced to become C2C2B. If you productize compellingly, you may have to empower super-seamlessly. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser realize that it is better to engineer holistically than to engineer interactively. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our long-term feature set is second to none, but our open-source solutions and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize wirelessly then you may also synthesize magnetically. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks, wireless niches and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used term "nano-iteration" really mean? What does it really mean to evolve "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of C++ and J2EE. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We believe we know that if you leverage virtually then you may also disintermediate perfectly. Have you ever been pressured to architect your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you leverage iteravely, you may have to cultivate extensibly. The metrics for customized portals are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We think we know that if you productize globally then you may also extend interactively. If you reintermediate vertically, you may have to empower holistically. What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to integrate "dynamically"? If you architect iteravely, you may have to synergize holistically. We usually facilitate cross-media user communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things!