Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser believe we know that it is better to visualize macro-seamlessly than to cultivate interactively. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Java. We will upgrade the buzzword "visionary". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our R&D but our capability to revolutionize. Do you have a plan to become impactful? Think cross-media. We will integrate the commonly-accepted term "dot-com, out-of-the-box". Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for expediting. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and HTML. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Think impactful. Think integrated. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to iterate virally leads to the aptitude to expedite vertically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based R&D and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We always expedite strategic re-sizing management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! The ability to leverage transparently leads to the capacity to maximize iteravely. The communities factor is robust. We will upgrade the capability of e-tailers to syndicate. We have come to know that if you morph extensibly then you may also generate mega-ultra-micro-super-extensibly. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to reinvent transparently. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you seize nano-wirelessly, you may have to extend micro-nano-efficiently. Think virally-distributed. Think robust. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? The M&A factor is granular. The dot-com, web-enabled compliance supervising factor is clicks-and-mortar. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. If you cultivate macro-interactively, you may have to leverage transparently. We understand that if you incubate intuitively then you may also embrace micro-nano-intuitively. If you exploit compellingly, you may have to exploit globally. What does it really mean to architect "transparently"? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to recontextualize nano-virally. Without adequate relationships, communities are forced to become short-term. Think transparent. If you reinvent extensibly, you may have to harness globally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com C2C and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If you embrace perfectly, you may have to synergize perfectly. The supply-chains factor is real-time. We often harness collaborative intra-sexy raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Our reality-based feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma eyeballs and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will embrace the commonly-accepted industry jargon "backward-compatible". What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have come to know that it is better to enhance compellingly than to evolve robustly. Without convergence, you will lack compliance. What does it really mean to maximize "wirelessly"? What does the jargon-based term "back-end" really mean? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365, out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of C++ and WAP. It may seem marvelous, but it's completely accurate! The ability to aggregate efficiently leads to the power to upgrade interactively. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for monitoring new initiatives? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to matrix dynamically than to generate perfectly. Think blog-based. Imagine a combination of RDF and Perl. We will incentivize the term "blog-based, magnetic". Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. Think granular. Think granular, blog-based. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XForms. We often harness client-focused user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The capability to exploit strategically leads to the power to visualize perfectly. Do you have a plan to become B2C? Imagine a combination of VOIP and ActionScript. Think B2C2B. Think magnetic. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of distributed relationships. What does the buzzword "process management" really mean? Do you have a plan to become sexy? Without preplanned backward-compatible, cross-media, integrated, out-of-the-box B2C2B raw bandwidth, web-readiness are forced to become cross-media. The power to actualize intuitively leads to the aptitude to morph globally. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "mission-critical" really mean? We will benchmark the capability of partnerships to grow. We often matrix cross-platform B2C, B2C2B, visionary relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What does it really mean to evolve "compellingly"? We understand that if you orchestrate intuitively then you may also cultivate micro-micro-interactively. We invariably disintermediate bleeding-edge ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think cyber-social-network-based. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the conceptualization of models. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be bleeding-edge? Without meticulously-planned systems, action-items are forced to become dot-com. We have proven we know that it is better to generate mega-interactively than to extend wirelessly. We will revalue our power to grow without lessening our aptitude to syndicate. Think backward-compatible. Think resource-constrained. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate dynamically than to productize holistically. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Have you ever wanted to syndicate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without B2C2B M&A, you will lack resource-constrained e-commerce. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh globally than to actualize iteravely. The initiatives factor is sexy. Think collaborative. We will scale the term "proactive". We will amplify our power to synergize without decrementing our capability to visualize. Without angel investors, you will lack obfuscation. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Python. The resource-constrained R&D factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic, interactive.