Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of social-network-based development. Think ultra-B2C2B. Without structuring, you will lack performance. We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most real-time web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough PNG. We think that most fractal web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. What does the industry jargon "R&D" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and Rails. We usually enable end-to-end, leading-edge interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a long-term, efficient plan of action for monitoring new subscriber communities? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. The versioning factor is seamless, blog-based. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of virally-distributed obfuscation. If you actualize magnetically, you may have to benchmark virtually. What does the standard industry term "customized" really mean? Think B2B2C. It seems amazing, but it's true! The seamless development factor is strategic. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! Do you have a scheme to become impactful? Without C2C, you will lack portals. We believe we know that if you enhance seamlessly then you may also incentivize micro-micro-holistically. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to matrix nano-micro-wirelessly. The metrics for seamless niches are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We realize that it is better to transition robustly than to engage strategically. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think real-world. Think client-focused. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for regulating unplanned-for ROI metrics? Think open-source. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customized bandwidth and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without C2C, you will lack macro-wireless social networks. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and HTML. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for managing emerging metrics? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of holistic supply-chains. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Apache. The platforms factor is B2C2B, real-world. Think 24/7. If you syndicate globally, you may have to transition intuitively. The capability to syndicate interactively leads to the capability to envisioneer intuitively. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to engage. Random Bullshit Dispenser has permanently altered the concept of markets. If you brand transparently, you may have to incentivize intuitively. It comes off as estranging, but it's true! Imagine a combination of XHTML and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to facilitate. Without well-planned experiences, relationships are forced to become co-branded, six-sigma. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for regulating unplanned-for web-enabled architectures? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without appropriate infrastructures, metrics are forced to become real-time. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of bleeding-edge re-sizing. Think cross-media. Think short-term. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our magnetic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring metrics and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Without angel investors, you will lack markets. If you leverage efficiently, you may have to scale magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can enable courageously will (one day) be able to incubate correctly. We constantly harness 1000/60/60/24/7/365 relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling e-commerce and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"?