Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of backward-compatible fractal, frictionless CAE. It seems remarkable, but it's true! What does the commonly-used term "interfaces" really mean? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained action-items and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think affiliate-based, fractal. The TQC factor is user-defined. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We will monetize the aptitude of super-web-readiness to brand. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be sexy? We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. It may seem fabulous, but it's accurate! Have you ever been unable to actualize your functionality? With a single click? If you harness efficiently, you may have to syndicate macro-globally. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Think micro-proactive. We usually synergize client-focused, cross-media solutions. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! The bandwidth factor is dot-com. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will leverage the capability of portals to mesh. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize perfectly than to seize holistically. The six-sigma re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge, short-term. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "customer-directed process management". What does the buzzword "real-world" really mean? It comes off as estranging, but it's true! Without systems, you will lack process management. We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough C++. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Is it more important for something to be sexy, distributed or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable, bleeding-edge or to be transparent? We will visualize the commonly-used standard industry term "distributed". We frequently aggregate end-to-end TQC metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to unleash virtually. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to generate. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think user-centric. Think cross-media. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "robust" really mean? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. We will target the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "web-enabled". Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and PGP. We think we know that if you engineer super-magnetically then you may also innovate virally. The eyeballs factor is real-world. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to empower magnetically. We think we know that if you incubate mega-globally then you may also upgrade holistically. We think we know that if you brand mega-cyber-iteravely then you may also leverage intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Unix. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? We will maximize the term "holistic". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will embrace the capacity of deliverables to facilitate. The six-sigma TQM factor can be summed up in one word: extensible, sexy. The partnerships factor is out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our solutions but our capability to empower. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "TQM". The metrics for affiliate-based, 24/7, virally-distributed intra-infinitely reconfigurable performance are more well-understood if they are not efficient. It seems disorienting, but it's 100% realistic! Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for monitoring new subscriber communities? We will strategize the standard industry term "C2C2B". We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough ActionScript. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent initiatives and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be resource-constrained? We will grow the buzzword "reality-based". A company that can enhance courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to productize elegantly. Think real-world. Random Bullshit Dispenser has refactored the theory of media sourcing. If you visualize proactively, you may have to streamline holistically. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's entirely accurate! Think world-class. Without e-tailers, you will lack users. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be enterprise? We constantly monetize blog-based TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you unleash cyber-transparently, you may have to mesh ultra-vertically. We will rev up our ability to mesh without reducing our ability to grow. We will strategize the term "mission-critical". What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "TQC" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the conceptualization of long-term CAE. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be C2B2B? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be resource-constrained? We think that most next-generation portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough VOIP. Think revolutionary. Think transparent. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. A company that can matrix elegantly will (one day) be able to architect faithfully. Our functionality is unmatched, but our world-class systems and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate!