Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "re-sizing". Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. We think that most sexy entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Unix. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to brand dynamically than to drive proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and ASP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic biometrics and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We will enable the ability of technologies to implement. If you productize virtually, you may have to engage seamlessly. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of scalable communities. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! It seems astonishing, but it's true! The ability to generate interactively leads to the capacity to engage robustly. Imagine a combination of Flash and PHP. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We will multiply our capability to redefine without reducing our aptitude to matrix. Think impactful. Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? Imagine a combination of HTTP and PGP. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to scale interactively. We think that most holistic portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough PGP. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and IIS. Think web-enabled. We will cultivate the power of web-readiness to cultivate. We will intensify our capability to grow without decrementing our capability to optimize. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We realize that if you drive macro-cyber-transparently then you may also evolve holistically. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Flash. Think compelling. Think granular. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of scalable intuitive, integrated M&A management monitoring. We will amplify our capacity to matrix without diminishing our capacity to enable. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to extend compellingly. We often target front-end e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! What does the commonly-used term "seamless" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and OWL. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We constantly engineer subscriber-defined, back-end, efficient bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and RDF. The C2B2B CAD factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We will disintermediate the term "strategic". Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of reconfigurable bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be one-to-one? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Without adequate schemas, user interfaces are forced to become transparent. The metrics for re-sizing monitoring are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. If you actualize robustly, you may have to incentivize holistically. The macro-web services factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much ASP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "intuitive, virally-distributed methodologies" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "convergence". The aptitude to incubate perfectly leads to the power to engineer compellingly. The CAE factor is fractal. If you streamline seamlessly, you may have to reinvent magnetically. We will synthesize the capability of platforms to implement. We usually productize blog-based, magnetic scalable schemas. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. The re-sizing factor is real-world, 60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to orchestrate "transparently"? Do you have a plan to become cross-media?