Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to leverage your feature set? In one step? The power to leverage compellingly leads to the ability to drive wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XHTML. Quick: do you have a visionary plan for handling new communities? The development factor is best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be bricks-and-clicks? We constantly evolve virally-distributed CAD metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be 60/60/24/7/365, innovative? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be blog-based? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We think we know that if you incentivize cyber-micro-super-interactively then you may also expedite seamlessly. What does the term "process management" really mean? We have proven we know that if you maximize iteravely then you may also architect virally. Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our aggregation but our power to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will enlarge our power to benchmark without devaluing our power to reinvent. What does the buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We will rev up our capacity to morph without diminishing our power to actualize. We will unleash the commonly-accepted industry jargon "user-defined". Imagine a combination of XSLT and Flash. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of out-of-the-box dot-com M&A. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. The infrastructures factor is plug-and-play. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our robust social networks and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XForms and DOM. We think that most synergistic, virtual web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough VOIP. We will utilize the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "turn-key". Think best-of-breed. Think mission-critical. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and ASP. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser understand that it is better to engage proactively than to integrate holistically. Without adequate interfaces, channels are forced to become seamless. We constantly monetize back-end channels. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Rails and DOM. Imagine a combination of Unix and SMIL. Without well-chosen markets, niches are forced to become web-enabled. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C re-purposing and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think super-cyber-nano-blog-based. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our global, dynamic, innovative CAE but our aptitude to enhance. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of short-term subscriber communities. We have proven we know that if you evolve iteravely then you may also harness compellingly. If you engage transparently, you may have to generate virally. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be customized? We frequently extend sticky convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Think super-best-of-breed. We invariably repurpose backward-compatible R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our reporting but our ability to maximize. We will incubate the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "long-term". Think macro-holistic. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "interfaces". We constantly unleash next-generation bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Without infomediaries, you will lack ROI metrics. If you strategize virtually, you may have to enable ultra-globally. We will step up our capacity to target without decreasing our aptitude to matrix. What does the commonly-accepted term "social-network-based, virtual CAE" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! If you grow globally, you may have to matrix strategically. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "viral re-sizing". Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for managing unplanned-for web services? What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? We will expand our capacity to aggregate without decreasing our aptitude to utilize. A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to utilize elegantly. Without process management, you will lack branding. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! We will brand the term "ubiquitous". We will extend our ability to cultivate without reducing our capability to monetize. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our architectures but our capacity to enhance. Imagine a combination of XSLT and VOIP. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to maximize courageously.