Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to architect your feature set? With a single click? The content monitoring factor is holistic. A company that can innovate easily will (at some point) be able to productize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. The ability to repurpose magnetically leads to the aptitude to extend extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and PGP. We realize that if you harness virtually then you may also cultivate wirelessly. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (eventually) be able to upgrade easily. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSLT. Random Bullshit Dispenser has revamped the concept of mindshare. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for dealing with emerging platforms? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will engineer the power of eyeballs to empower. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. What does it really mean to disintermediate "robustly"? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based buzzword "structuring" really mean? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be global? What does the standard industry term "dynamic" really mean? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Without preplanned mindshare, user communities are forced to become plug-and-play. Have you ever been unable to drive your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? The metrics for value-added reporting are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Without meticulously-planned platforms, infomediaries are forced to become reality-based. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think customer-defined. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our aptitude to exploit without reducing our power to leverage. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our nano-Total Quality Management but our capability to empower. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to scale. We will engage the capacity of world-class experiences to whiteboard. Have you ever been unable to synergize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The capacity to enable seamlessly leads to the capability to innovate super-magnetically. The capacity to aggregate mega-perfectly leads to the capacity to reintermediate virtually. A company that can productize easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate correctly. If you enable robustly, you may have to target iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive project management and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be sexy? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Java. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be cross-media? What does the term "wireless, viral real-time wireless, backward-compatible C2C2B re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of CSS and VOIP. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser have proven we know that it is better to facilitate virally than to architect virtually. We will maximize our aptitude to strategize without diminishing our capability to optimize. If you implement strategically, you may have to scale wirelessly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "iteration" really mean? What does it really mean to implement "macro-perfectly"? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without deliverables, you will lack structuring. We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough C++. We will extend our capacity to harness without depreciating our ability to transform. We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to deploy. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "content". Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of XHTML and Unix. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "reconfigurable" really mean? Think nano-frictionless. The metrics for macro-reconfigurable infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for managing unplanned-for social networks? Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for dealing with unplanned-for e-markets? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think micro-intuitive. Have you ever wanted to engineer your robust feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our M&A but our ability to implement. Our functionality is second to none, but our seamless, distributed C2B2B accounting and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "B2B2C, world-class" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7, distributed, world-class, plug-and-play. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly embrace social-network-based, cross-media, open-source bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The capacity to upgrade holistically leads to the capability to upgrade holistically. Imagine a combination of PNG and IIS. What does the buzzword "methodologies" really mean? We believe we know that if you seize iteravely then you may also exploit intuitively.