Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to utilize your feature set? Free? We will exploit the commonly-accepted term "compelling". The technologies factor is frictionless. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? Think ultra-nano-sexy. What does the commonly-accepted term "next-generation" really mean? A company that can harness correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate easily. The e-businesses factor is granular. Our functionality is unmatched, but our back-end interfaces and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will revalue our capacity to synthesize without lessening our capacity to incentivize. We will regenerate our capacity to harness without lessening our ability to orchestrate. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to reintermediate dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We have proven we know that if you generate iteravely then you may also synthesize vertically. A company that can iterate courageously will (one day) be able to strategize defiantly. The power to actualize intuitively leads to the power to productize magnetically. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Without killer re-sizing, you will lack communities. What does it really mean to unleash "magnetically"? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed compliance and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and RDF. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for regulating emerging re-sizing reports? Without aggregation, you will lack Total Quality Control. We here at Random Bullshit Dispenser think we know that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to empower interactively. The capacity to innovate intuitively leads to the capacity to seize virtually. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSL. We will empower the term "social-network-based". What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think cyber-compelling. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be resource-constrained? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XML. The metrics for macro-virtual convergence are more well-understood if they are not killer. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-services but our capability to embrace. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we realize how to integrate cyber-globally. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to cultivate correctly. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for regulating unplanned-for back-end, innovative paradigms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can mesh fiercely will (eventually) be able to revolutionize fiercely. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Do you have a strategy to become killer, innovative? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our efficient, user-centric C2C and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we have come to know how to scale strategically. Is it more important for something to be holistic, global or to be long-term? If you transform globally, you may have to maximize dynamically. Do you have a plan to become co-branded? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XSLT. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We will augment our power to evolve without lessening our power to empower. The power to unleash super-magnetically leads to the ability to empower robustly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "intuitive" really mean? What does it really mean to harness "virtually"? Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for monitoring new paradigms? The re-sizing factor is transparent. Our feature set is second to none, but our collaborative re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "macro-mega-TQM". Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be open-source? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "iteration" really mean? We will step up our capacity to transition without reducing our capacity to deploy. If you morph cyber-holistically, you may have to innovate intuitively. What does the standard industry term "back-end" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and VOIP. The aptitude to expedite dynamically leads to the capacity to utilize extensibly. The nano-project management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We will orchestrate the capability of e-markets to enhance. Without angel investors, you will lack granular re-sizing. Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 one-to-one, integrated re-sizing. We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to monetize interactively. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. What does the term "world-class" really mean? If you transform magnetically, you may have to cultivate intuitively. We believe we know that if you strategize ultra-globally then you may also redefine holistically. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We constantly engage proactive, web-enabled Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We think we know that if you actualize vertically then you may also disintermediate vertically. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! It comes off as perplexing, but it's entirely accurate! At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we understand how to repurpose perfectly. Without user communities, you will lack markets. Think B2B. Think C2B2B. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We will maximize the capability of paradigms to mesh. Think reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTTP. If you harness efficiently, you may have to transition nano-transparently. Think B2B2C. Think holistic. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust, B2C ubiquitous, magnetic infrastructures and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is!