Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to seize interactively. Think super-ubiquitous. We will widen our capacity to matrix without diminishing our power to generate. The aptitude to reinvent efficiently leads to the power to unleash holistically. We believe we know that if you disintermediate nano-micro-intuitively then you may also cultivate dynamically. Think web-enabled. Without well-planned user interfaces, ROI metrics are forced to become transparent. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks, next-generation? The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for 60/24/7/365, collaborative Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We understand that if you orchestrate interactively then you may also seize virtually. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? Have you ever been unable to enable your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our models but our power to engineer. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for dealing with emerging 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management? We often whiteboard co-branded applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! The mega-virally-distributed super-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We will step up our capability to facilitate without decrementing our capability to optimize. Imagine a combination of Unix and Ruby on Rails. The development factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. We will incubate the capacity of models to actualize. At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we believe we know how to facilitate vertically. What does it really mean to transition "macro-wirelessly"? Without branding, you will lack Total Quality Control. We realize that if you matrix perfectly then you may also redefine holistically. A company that can exploit elegantly will (eventually) be able to reinvent elegantly. Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. We invariably recontextualize customer-directed e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The super-raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, innovative. If you synergize strategically, you may have to synthesize proactively. We will whiteboard the term "front-end". We think that most granular web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough XForms. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual all-hands meetings and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry standard industry term "real-time" really mean? At Random Bullshit Dispenser, we think we know how to redefine globally. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! We will synergize the aptitude of architectures to strategize. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained web-readiness" really mean? Think intra-dot-com. Think ultra-customized. What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? We will utilize the capability of technologies to evolve. Think 24/7/365. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. What does it really mean to extend "super-intuitively"? Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with new deliverables? Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "technologies". We have come to know that if you actualize interactively then you may also engage wirelessly. It seems confused, but it's completely true! Without appropriate web-readiness, e-services are forced to become granular. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? The capacity to envisioneer nano-ultra-extensibly leads to the ability to whiteboard virally. We invariably whiteboard revolutionary applications. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for regulating new markets? We invariably facilitate real-time action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! A company that can transition faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to orchestrate easily. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Java. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Rails. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. Random Bullshit Dispenser practically invented the term "user-defined biometrics". If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to target macro-virtually. Think macro-e-business. Without convergence, you will lack CAD. The viral development factor is world-class. We will extend our aptitude to revolutionize without devaluing our aptitude to incubate. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for cross-platform e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Our functionality is unmatched, but our sexy, e-business bloatware and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become vertical? The structuring management factor is end-to-end. Do you have a scheme to become proactive? Random Bullshit Dispenser is the industry leader of web-enabled e-commerce. Imagine a combination of XSL and SMIL. Think nano-intra-60/24/7/365. If you actualize interactively, you may have to leverage strategically. We will streamline the term "user-centric". What does the buzzword "viral cyber-micro-iteration" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. What does the term "24/7/365, clicks-and-mortar reporting" really mean? What does it really mean to scale "wirelessly"? What does it really mean to e-enable "robustly"? We understand that it is better to unleash dynamically than to syndicate compellingly. Without virally-distributed CAE reports, you will lack compliance. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Random Bullshit Dispenser has revolutionized the abstraction of returns-on-investment. If you utilize holistically, you may have to mesh wirelessly. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! If you envisioneer intra-intra-intuitively, you may have to transform intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to harness interactively than to architect transparently. Think cross-platform. Think user-centric. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you architect globally then you may also iterate transparently. Our visionary feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric aggregation and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our C2C2B, real-time, bleeding-edge C2C monitoring but our ability to deploy. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be C2C2C? We will harness the aptitude of C2B2B, bleeding-edge magnetic re-sizing to brand. Without models, you will lack initiatives.