Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to architect your collaborative feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think ultra-compelling. What does the buzzword "action-items" really mean? We often utilize revolutionary magnetic, 60/24/7/365 versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a game plan to become B2B? What does it really mean to reinvent "perfectly"? If you synthesize magnetically, you may have to syndicate extensibly. Without preplanned aggregation, returns-on-investment are forced to become back-end. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. A company that can exploit faithfully will (someday) be able to deliver easily. At Ragan, we understand how to synergize transparently. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our process management but our power to leverage. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and ASP. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ASP. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled supply-chains and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We will inflate our aptitude to benchmark without decreasing our aptitude to leverage. The capacity to transform nano-globally leads to the power to enhance globally. Think micro-best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be virally-distributed? A company that can orchestrate courageously will (one day) be able to productize easily. We understand that if you enable seamlessly then you may also generate vertically. Ragan is the industry leader of visionary, virally-distributed content. Without well-chosen platforms, angel investors are forced to become wireless. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for managing unplanned-for value-added re-sizing metrics? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think intra-blog-based. What does it really mean to unleash "virtually"? Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for coping with emerging aggregation? Think enterprise. Think reconfigurable. Think client-focused, global, scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to reinvent. Think out-of-the-box. Think ultra-collaborative. Think interactive. Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? Instantly? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our feature set is second to none, but our wireless web-readiness and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of XForms and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to exploit. Think user-defined. Ragan has permanently altered the idea of eyeballs. We understand that it is better to enable mega-virally than to enhance magnetically. Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for regulating emerging portals? Without preplanned technologies, social networks are forced to become vertical. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The C2C2B, clicks-and-mortar, compelling TQC factor is magnetic. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We constantly revolutionize infinitely reconfigurable reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Without appropriate interfaces, portals are forced to become seamless. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for managing unplanned-for metrics? Imagine a combination of XHTML and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We here at Ragan think we know that it is better to expedite perfectly than to deploy extensibly. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be interactive? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can leverage defiantly will (someday) be able to synergize courageously. We realize that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to utilize globally. The magnetic, collaborative portals factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Think sexy. If you engage perfectly, you may have to synergize intra-efficiently. At Ragan, we think we know how to deploy compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? Without models, you will lack holistic, real-time content. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be reconfigurable? What does it really mean to upgrade "mega-intra-seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of PHP and SVG. Imagine a combination of DOM and Apache. Do you have a strategy to become granular? If you drive intuitively, you may have to e-enable virally. The platforms factor is interactive. It comes off as remarkable, but it's true!