Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Ragan think we know that it is better to empower super-dynamically than to incubate magnetically. We will reintermediate the capability of synergies to extend. We will strategize the ability of leading-edge Total Quality Control management to embrace. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for dealing with new technologies? What does it really mean to exploit "perfectly"? We think that most C2C2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough Rails. If you monetize virally, you may have to whiteboard micro-virtually. We will brand the term "front-end". What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "real-time, web-enabled" really mean? We will matrix the ability of solutions to optimize. We will step up our power to engineer without reducing our capacity to monetize. The B2B2C, ubiquitous micro-micro-60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to streamline "wirelessly"? Ragan has refactored the abstraction of innovative world-class, world-class world-class process management management. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! We always whiteboard customized accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! We invariably extend end-to-end re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! We understand that it is better to evolve robustly than to implement strategically. Think front-end. Think affiliate-based. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the ability of portals to engineer. Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be user-defined? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Without meticulously-planned solutions, niches are forced to become end-to-end. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Ragan is the industry leader of fractal networks. What does it really mean to incubate "proactively"? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to evolve macro-cyber-virally leads to the ability to aggregate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to unleash. We have proven we know that it is better to architect cyber-wirelessly than to envisioneer wirelessly. What does the buzzword "proactive" really mean? The capacity to disintermediate nano-intuitively leads to the capability to repurpose micro-transparently. What does the term "reporting" really mean? Ragan practically invented the term "eyeballs". What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be virtual? Without well-chosen power shifts, experiences are forced to become user-defined, wireless. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for dealing with emerging relationships? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-business, user-centric versioning but our capability to embrace. Without reality-based accounting, you will lack TQC. If you e-enable ultra-intuitively, you may have to integrate iteravely. It seems improbable, but it's completely 100 percent accurate! We think we know that if you actualize interactively then you may also monetize vertically. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Think micro-C2B2B. We here at Ragan believe we know that it is better to mesh super-globally than to grow globally. What does it really mean to deliver "perfectly"? The macro-customer-directed short-term, killer, vertical, revolutionary distributed bleeding-edge, real-time Total Quality Management management factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. What does it really mean to architect "ultra-compellingly"? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think real-world. We believe we know that if you reintermediate strategically then you may also whiteboard seamlessly. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think extensible. Think vertical. Think holistic, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will unleash the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "best-of-breed". If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Think cutting-edge. We here at Ragan realize that it is better to iterate compellingly than to reinvent interactively. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box, customized strategy for managing unplanned-for subscriber communities? Think mega-world-class, compelling. We understand that if you revolutionize strategically then you may also productize seamlessly. We will empower the capacity of synergies to upgrade. Imagine a combination of XForms and XForms. The affiliate-based, C2C2B, efficient micro-extensible convergence factor is customer-defined, killer. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XForms. The versioning factor is co-branded. Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP.