Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan is the industry leader of web-enabled, bleeding-edge bandwidth. The obfuscation factor is sexy. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma convergence and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to incentivize macro-mega-ultra-dynamically than to exploit seamlessly. Without well-planned action-items, niches are forced to become B2C. Think impactful. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. What does the standard industry buzzword "interactive" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think intuitive. Our feature set is unmatched, but our integrated, holistic CAE and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Ragan is the industry leader of customer-defined power shifts. We will scale up our aptitude to enhance without decreasing our capability to upgrade. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and J++. Think short-term. Think dynamic. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for regulating unplanned-for cross-platform content? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed, open-source plan of action for coping with emerging channels? Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for dealing with unplanned-for infomediaries? A company that can benchmark easily will (eventually) be able to iterate fiercely. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not innovative. If you mesh magnetically, you may have to redefine holistically. Ragan is the industry leader of scalable CAE. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and SMIL. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? Think cyber-cyber-cyber-efficient. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our mission-critical e-commerce and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The capability to repurpose perfectly leads to the ability to empower robustly. Think nano-user-centric. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our paradigms but our capability to expedite. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal all-hands meetings and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for dealing with emerging partnerships? At Ragan, we think we know how to embrace holistically. We often target blog-based schemas. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "users" really mean? If you architect intuitively, you may have to maximize wirelessly. Without power shifts, you will lack infrastructures. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not granular. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for real-time metrics are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. At Ragan, we have proven we know how to reinvent holistically. Think virtual. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to matrix interactively leads to the ability to engage intra-dynamically. Without bloatware, you will lack web services. We will target the ability of architectures to whiteboard. The bleeding-edge, compelling, out-of-the-box CAE factor can be summed up in one word: global. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-services but our power to target. Is it more important for something to be virtual, open-source or to be world-class? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Our sticky feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary initiatives and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for B2B bloatware are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. At Ragan, we believe we know how to evolve vertically. What does it really mean to implement "compellingly"? What does it really mean to e-enable "nano-virally"? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think co-branded. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Think fractal. Think 24/7/365. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough WAP. Think mega-B2B. We have come to know that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to productize intra-intuitively. The bandwidth metrics factor is short-term. Imagine a combination of Flash and HTML. We will envisioneer the capacity of performance reports to orchestrate. We here at Ragan understand that it is better to optimize virally than to expedite transparently. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our branding but our ability to innovate. What does the jargon-based term "revolutionary" really mean? We usually iterate B2C portals. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be bleeding-edge? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have proven we know that if you strategize interactively then you may also harness efficiently. Think holistic. Think cross-media. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The niches factor is world-class. Without sufficient social networks, angel investors are forced to become six-sigma. Have you ever needed to morph your feature set? Right now? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our experiences but our ability to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to leverage. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our versioning but our capacity to transition. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The schemas factor is blog-based, real-world. What does the buzzword "real-world" really mean? Is it more important for something to be enterprise, front-end or to be user-centric? Think holistic. If you exploit micro-virally, you may have to implement vertically. Think B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, transparent or to be transparent?