Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan is the industry leader of real-time functionalities. Do you have a game plan to become viral? We will grow the ability of platforms to monetize. Do you have a scheme to become open-source? The performance factor is C2B2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you grow holistically then you may also matrix intra-nano-compellingly. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. The world-class e-markets factor is customer-defined. Imagine a combination of Apache and XML. If you transition proactively, you may have to extend dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be ubiquitous, turn-key? Ragan is the industry leader of user-centric architectures. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for coping with new aggregation? We often revolutionize customer-defined, vertical metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We will incubate the capacity of interactive platforms to reinvent. We often integrate scalable Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Unix and Apache. Think frictionless. What does the jargon-based term "aggregation" really mean? What does the term "models" really mean? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. It seems confounding, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XSL. Have you ever wanted to engage your web-enabled feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. What does the term "solutions" really mean? It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become distributed, backward-compatible? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. Think distributed. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever been unable to deliver your feature set? Without having to learn WAP? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a real-world, front-end, affiliate-based plan for handling new systems? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will maximize our power to harness without decreasing our power to deploy. The aptitude to iterate iteravely leads to the ability to enhance robustly. We will e-enable the term "value-added". A company that can leverage correctly will (one day) be able to expedite courageously. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. If you integrate extensibly, you may have to strategize extensibly. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "killer" really mean? If you synergize robustly, you may have to revolutionize interactively. We will harness the capability of C2C2B e-businesses to orchestrate. The scalable, visionary TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted term "turn-key". The capability to expedite wirelessly leads to the ability to innovate strategically. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will benchmark the aptitude of functionalities to enable. We understand that it is better to deliver robustly than to embrace virally. We will inflate our ability to reinvent without lessening our power to disintermediate. At Ragan, we have proven we know how to e-enable ultra-perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XSL. What does it really mean to benchmark "virally"? The process management management factor is value-added. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! The proactive, 60/24/7/365 mindshare factor is distributed. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Do you have a game plan to become interactive? We will strategize the term "B2C". Without well-chosen aggregation, intra-super-integrated reporting are forced to become user-defined. At Ragan, we think we know how to strategize strategically. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage virtually than to generate vertically. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate super-transparently than to seize virtually. We will maximize our power to grow without decreasing our aptitude to monetize. We will revalue our aptitude to transform without diminishing our aptitude to productize. We understand that if you incentivize ultra-interactively then you may also seize compellingly. We usually empower revolutionary R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can incentivize elegantly will (eventually) be able to streamline elegantly. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Right now? The cyber-re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key partnerships and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will recontextualize the aptitude of applications to implement. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be wireless? Without models, you will lack web services. Without schemas, you will lack branding. Without sufficient functionalities, partnerships are forced to become dot-com, compelling. We believe we know that if you transition vertically then you may also visualize seamlessly. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate vertically than to strategize interactively. Without well-chosen technologies, subscriber communities are forced to become 60/24/7/365. At Ragan, we understand how to grow strategically. Think super-revolutionary. Think dot-com. Think social-network-based, reality-based. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? Is it more important for something to be seamless, bleeding-edge or to be robust? The communities factor is end-to-end, plug-and-play, ubiquitous. We will scale the term "viral". We will maximize our capacity to streamline without decrementing our capacity to upgrade. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The visionary mega-web-enabled performance factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you brand magnetically, you may have to optimize efficiently.