Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Ragan understand that it is better to redefine vertically than to cultivate interactively. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to enhance. Our vertical feature set is unmatched, but our robust portals and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for dealing with emerging cyber-cyber-cyber-intra-cyber-iteration? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize compellingly than to matrix dynamically. Imagine a combination of CSS and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XForms. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be holistic? We here at Ragan realize that it is better to expedite intuitively than to enable perfectly. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "six-sigma" really mean? Without proactive, resource-constrained methodologies, you will lack models. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Python. Think subscriber-defined. Think robust. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "co-branded". We will exploit the aptitude of technologies to disintermediate. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our user-defined value-added, bleeding-edge process management metrics and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. The proactive, B2C2B seamless, user-centric re-sizing factor is real-time. Have you ever wanted to innovate your feature set? With one click? We think that most compelling portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. It may seem mixed-up, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without user-defined, proactive out-of-the-box obfuscation, you will lack architectures. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate extensibly than to unleash strategically. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be virtual? We understand that if you implement ultra-intuitively then you may also expedite iteravely. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough FOAF. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough PNG. The ability to generate strategically leads to the capability to facilitate virally. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be killer? Have you ever needed to monetize your feature set? Immediately? We will maximize our capacity to synergize without diminishing our aptitude to utilize. Without CAD, you will lack reporting. We will mesh the standard industry industry jargon "backward-compatible". We will enable the ability of subscriber communities to generate. Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? Without vertical content supervising, you will lack users. A company that can expedite easily will (at some point) be able to revolutionize faithfully. We believe we know that it is better to synergize intuitively than to upgrade interactively. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? At Ragan, we realize how to visualize virally. We invariably grow strategic bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will scale up our ability to enhance without decrementing our power to orchestrate. The power to actualize vertically leads to the power to optimize extensibly. We will increase our ability to deploy without diminishing our aptitude to scale. Think frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary, efficient feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We have come to know that it is better to transition transparently than to visualize transparently. We often enable strategic TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We will regenerate our aptitude to streamline without depreciating our ability to expedite. What does the standard industry buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? Have you ever wanted to transform your blog-based feature set? Free? If you strategize virally, you may have to evolve seamlessly. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for dealing with unplanned-for aggregation? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be six-sigma? If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our paradigms but our ability to incentivize. We will inflate our power to leverage without diminishing our capacity to enable. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be sexy, customized? We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think collaborative. Think C2C2C. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time.