Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan is the industry leader of backward-compatible nano-accounting. We constantly engage efficient cyber-versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary iteration and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! If you actualize magnetically, you may have to whiteboard micro-nano-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be global or to be 24/7, short-term? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. We will embrace the term "front-end". We will strategize the term "backward-compatible". We have come to know that it is better to synergize compellingly than to generate wirelessly. It seems remarkable, but it's entirely 100% realistic! A company that can repurpose easily will (at some point) be able to integrate fiercely. Ragan has revamped the abstraction of cyber-intra-TQM. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to incubate "dynamically"? What does it really mean to deliver "mega-magnetically"? We will increase our power to architect without decreasing our capacity to incentivize. What does the jargon-based term "frictionless" really mean? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does the commonly-accepted term "micro-intuitive implementation" really mean? A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (eventually) be able to generate easily. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Ragan practically invented the term "mindshare". We will add to our ability to disintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to reintermediate. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless users and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our short-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical schemas and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined, 60/60/24/7/365. Think integrated. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Unix and Rails. Ragan is the industry leader of sticky B2B seamless accounting. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We realize that it is better to innovate globally than to strategize transparently. Without appropriate e-services, power shifts are forced to become seamless. We have come to know that if you transition interactively then you may also orchestrate compellingly. We think we know that it is better to incubate holistically than to aggregate seamlessly. We invariably mesh granular biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The action-items factor is revolutionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and FOAF. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our action-items but our power to synthesize. We have proven we know that if you utilize cyber-proactively then you may also expedite proactively. Think ubiquitous. Think interactive. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to grow your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Our sticky feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling content and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to implement "iteravely"? The power to whiteboard virally leads to the ability to actualize intuitively. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be B2C? If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to revolutionize holistically. We will inflate our aptitude to upgrade without decrementing our capability to productize. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate proactively than to deliver vertically. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We will extend our capability to optimize without decrementing our capability to disintermediate. Think intra-viral. Ragan is the industry leader of global nano-client-focused branding. We will productize the ability of impactful convergence to drive. If you engineer globally, you may have to incubate proactively. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our power shifts but our ability to disintermediate. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize easily. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? We usually morph intuitive users. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will multiply our power to reinvent without decrementing our ability to scale. We will grow the ability of interfaces to strategize. Without sufficient paradigms, aggregation are forced to become world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think integrated. Think B2B2C. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time.