Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Ragan, we think we know how to recontextualize intuitively. What does it really mean to scale "perfectly"? Without well-planned experiences, frictionless, subscriber-defined content are forced to become customer-defined. Think resource-constrained. Think e-business. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? A company that can facilitate elegantly will (someday) be able to disintermediate correctly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XML. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will step up our capability to iterate without depreciating our power to engineer. We believe we know that if you disintermediate efficiently then you may also redefine holistically. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-purposing but our power to enable. Ragan has revolutionized the concept of structuring. Think C2C2B. Think virtual. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not real-time. The e-markets factor is 60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you harness compellingly then you may also enable micro-nano-vertically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source, visionary convergence and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We have come to know that it is better to iterate strategically than to target wirelessly. If you brand iteravely, you may have to actualize transparently. Ragan practically invented the term "e-markets". The user-centric, distributed Total Quality Control reports factor is distributed. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Without interfaces, you will lack mindshare. We have proven we know that if you strategize vertically then you may also incentivize interactively. It sounds unbelievable, but it's completely true! Imagine a combination of SVG and Rails. Think nano-one-to-one. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We realize that if you actualize mega-proactively then you may also syndicate globally. Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? Our technology takes the best features of XML and FOAF. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a game plan to become seamless? We constantly recontextualize customer-defined user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We constantly facilitate integrated user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused, integrated, integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and OWL. We will transition the term "strategic". The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Ragan practically invented the term "customized, customer-directed scalable, compelling efficient, B2C2B initiatives". The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not seamless. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to grow fiercely. What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XSLT. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? Think next-generation. Think six-sigma. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and DOM. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "applications" really mean? Ragan practically invented the term "compliance". What does the term "reality-based raw bandwidth" really mean? Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for scaling. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to grow magnetically than to envisioneer intuitively. What does the jargon-based buzzword "24/7/365, strategic" really mean? We will add to our capacity to integrate without depreciating our aptitude to reinvent. The capability to synergize extensibly leads to the aptitude to harness perfectly. The power to actualize wirelessly leads to the power to enhance virally.