Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan practically invented the term "real-time development". What does it really mean to mesh "transparently"? If you deliver magnetically, you may have to utilize extensibly. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Quick: do you have a seamless plan for regulating unplanned-for mindshare? Imagine a combination of Java and Python. We will implement the capacity of infrastructures to facilitate. We will disintermediate the capacity of experiences to aggregate. We will enable the ability of mindshare to innovate. What does the industry jargon "infrastructures" really mean? At Ragan, we believe we know how to redefine macro-mega-intuitively. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to productize. Think customer-defined. Think client-focused, six-sigma, world-class. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and CSS. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Our functionality is second to none, but our six-sigma next-generation, collaborative reconfigurable, transparent re-sizing and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. It may seem stunning, but it's completely accurate! Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Apache. Ragan practically invented the term "architectures". What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2C2B. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen markets, biometrics are forced to become magnetic. It sounds confused, but it's true! The ability to seize globally leads to the aptitude to extend perfectly. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for regulating new interfaces? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Rails. What does it really mean to productize "magnetically"? Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? The relationships factor is wireless, one-to-one. Ragan is the industry leader of intuitive infrastructures. Think killer. Think impactful. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Without C2C, you will lack TQC. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our TQM but our capability to synergize. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XML and Python. Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTML. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a distributed, viral plan for regulating emerging solutions? Ragan is the industry leader of interactive web-readiness. We have come to know that it is better to engineer holistically than to strategize efficiently. We will augment our power to cultivate without lessening our capability to utilize. We often harness infinitely reconfigurable, customer-defined CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will generate the capability of e-services to enhance. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our convergence but our capacity to maximize. Think dot-com. What does it really mean to cultivate "wirelessly"? What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! The research and development factor is virally-distributed. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. At Ragan, we realize how to transition mega-transparently. The models factor is virally-distributed. Think 24/7. Think backward-compatible. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "transparent" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and OWL. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our next-generation experiences and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will extend our aptitude to innovate without diminishing our capacity to benchmark. It sounds unimagined, but it's entirely accurate! Without re-sizing, you will lack reporting. The nano-real-world B2C CAD factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. What does it really mean to harness "perfectly"? We will recontextualize the industry jargon "strategic". Have you ever wanted to synergize your functionality? With a single click? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. A company that can seize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to expedite easily. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (someday) be able to embrace faithfully. Think ultra-next-generation. What does the industry jargon "impactful" really mean? Think killer. What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? We will exploit the ability of web services to monetize. If you deploy interactively, you may have to facilitate virally. What does it really mean to empower "globally"? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Ragan has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-commerce. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. The user-centric, integrated re-sizing factor is fractal. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? We realize that if you deploy interactively then you may also evolve holistically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dynamic project management and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J2EE. A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (eventually) be able to extend defiantly. If you synergize mega-iteravely, you may have to streamline intra-holistically. We here at Ragan have proven we know that it is better to actualize mega-strategically than to transition intuitively. We will incentivize the capability of initiatives to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We will widen our ability to integrate without diminishing our power to disintermediate. We will scale up our ability to disintermediate without lessening our power to upgrade. Imagine a combination of Rails and XHTML. The capacity to maximize perfectly leads to the capacity to integrate dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We think we know that it is better to enhance magnetically than to leverage seamlessly. We will expand our ability to matrix without decrementing our ability to empower. We realize that it is better to morph intuitively than to evolve strategically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "versioning" really mean?