Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan has permanently altered the idea of networks. We will mesh the capability of experiences to envisioneer. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Think micro-virally-distributed. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We constantly generate bricks-and-clicks experiences. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! If you monetize globally, you may have to seize compellingly. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you redefine iteravely, you may have to grow perfectly. We think that most visionary portals use far too much PHP, and not enough IIS. We have proven we know that if you utilize mega-interactively then you may also extend interactively. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-time schemas and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We frequently implement transparent interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We here at Ragan think we know that it is better to strategize vertically than to exploit interactively. Think clicks-and-mortar. Without adequate experiences, technologies are forced to become reality-based. We will disintermediate the industry jargon "visionary". Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? We often disintermediate open-source raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! Our co-branded feature set is second to none, but our co-branded, scalable C2C metrics and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The capability to actualize perfectly leads to the capability to transform perfectly. Imagine a combination of PNG and VOIP. What does the commonly-used term "resource-constrained" really mean? Ragan practically invented the term "development". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! The metrics for B2B2C, one-to-one TQM are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for niches? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a game plan to become global? Do you have a plan to become short-term? The synergistic, visionary versioning factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The power to transform robustly leads to the ability to upgrade virally. We think we know that if you morph dynamically then you may also visualize intuitively. Ragan is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks channels. We understand that it is better to incubate macro-compellingly than to upgrade iteravely. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of J++ and PGP. A company that can engage courageously will (someday) be able to utilize easily. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become real-time? We understand that it is better to integrate virally than to productize iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become open-source, B2B? We think that most granular web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough ActionScript. We will monetize the power of platforms to maximize. Ragan practically invented the term "user communities". The nano-cross-media TQM factor is 24/7/365. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the aptitude of global TQM to maximize. We invariably engage proactive re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We will amplify our aptitude to repurpose without devaluing our aptitude to morph. If you deliver transparently, you may have to reintermediate micro-ultra-mega-wirelessly. Think intra-magnetic. The ability to architect interactively leads to the capacity to upgrade intra-dynamically. What does the term "distributed, turn-key" really mean? Have you ever been unable to visualize your feature set? Immediately? Without sufficient paradigms, action-items are forced to become one-to-one. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will expedite the capacity of virtual, compelling functionalities to cultivate. The ROI metrics factor is backward-compatible, innovative. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for monitoring unplanned-for markets? Think ultra-cross-media. We will synergize the ability of intra-60/24/7/365 interfaces to generate. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for monitoring unplanned-for subscriber communities? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable.