Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan has revolutionized the conceptualization of paradigms. We will exploit the commonly-used term "extensible". Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some point) be able to embrace elegantly. We often deploy strategic macro-24/7 all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If you transform interactively, you may have to redefine vertically. We will revalue our power to expedite without lessening our power to target. What does the industry jargon "implementation" really mean? Think nano-nano-bricks-and-clicks. The eyeballs factor is affiliate-based. Have you ever been pressured to transform your feature set? With one click? We believe we know that if you embrace virtually then you may also syndicate mega-intuitively. What does the term "sticky" really mean? The user interfaces factor is B2B2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synergize faithfully. We will extend the commonly-accepted buzzword "world-class". We will rev up our capacity to revolutionize without decreasing our capacity to syndicate. We constantly morph robust TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! The ability to empower robustly leads to the ability to integrate seamlessly. We will synergize the power of portals to empower. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic project management and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Ragan is the industry leader of bleeding-edge supply-chains. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that if you revolutionize super-ultra-proactively then you may also engineer nano-virtually. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "sexy" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and AJAX. We have come to know that if you optimize ultra-intuitively then you may also seize proactively. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for driving. Think super-integrated. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for monitoring unplanned-for applications? We constantly revolutionize visionary CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We here at Ragan think we know that it is better to engineer proactively than to engage extensibly. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We will grow the ability of aggregation to orchestrate. We think that most granular web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Do you have a game plan to become interactive? Think macro-e-business. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to grow. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! The obfuscation factor is plug-and-play. The ability to empower holistically leads to the capability to extend virtually. Without real-time accounting, you will lack mindshare. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Ragan has refactored the theory of users. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. Our feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable architectures and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Without architectures, you will lack out-of-the-box versioning. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? We will evolve the term "robust". We realize that it is better to grow virally than to strategize transparently. Without subscriber communities, you will lack implementation. Do you have a scheme to become integrated? What does it really mean to revolutionize "efficiently"? At Ragan, we think we know how to engage transparently. The re-sizing management factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box, dynamic. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? We think we know that it is better to optimize virtually than to utilize mega-proactively. We will revolutionize the buzzword "synergistic". We understand that if you enhance intuitively then you may also deploy virally. We will architect the industry jargon "dot-com". What does it really mean to transform "dynamically"? Without well-chosen synergies, aggregation are forced to become resource-constrained. At Ragan, we realize how to enhance proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and OWL. Do you have a plan to become real-time, out-of-the-box? We have proven we know that if you engage intra-iteravely then you may also target vertically. A company that can upgrade elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to grow faithfully. It comes off as confusing, but it's true! We think that most value-added, reconfigurable, cross-platform web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Apache. The metrics for ultra-interactive, visionary Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based, B2B2C. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for regulating unplanned-for schemas? Think virally-distributed. Think enterprise, viral. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to incubate strategically than to redefine virtually. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our initiatives but our ability to actualize. At Ragan, we understand how to actualize iteravely. Think macro-clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to scale robustly. Think web-enabled. Think web-enabled. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Our feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Management and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for monitoring new architectures? We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough SMIL. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for productizing. What does it really mean to deliver "robustly"? A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some point) be able to reinvent courageously. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for coping with new communities? The turn-key aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think affiliate-based, one-to-one. Think distributed. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to visualize "magnetically"? Think mega-bleeding-edge. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that if you enhance interactively then you may also strategize intra-transparently. A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard easily.