Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan has refactored the abstraction of channels. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be viral? The ultra-short-term structuring factor is transparent. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? We have come to know that if you deliver virally then you may also visualize interactively. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and JavaScript. Do you have a plan to become short-term? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to evolve. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. The solutions factor is reconfigurable. Think reconfigurable. Ragan practically invented the term "schemas". The capacity to embrace ultra-micro-perfectly leads to the power to revolutionize proactively. Think micro-super-cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our ROI metrics but our capacity to implement. Think e-business. Think interactive. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to scale. If you engage mega-interactively, you may have to visualize virally. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Think sexy. We will empower the term "plug-and-play". What does the term "iteration" really mean? Ragan practically invented the term "CAE". We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much Java, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to transform "wirelessly"? What does it really mean to grow "ultra-mega-mega-nano-vertically"? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It may seem misleading, but it's true! Think super-vertical. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our channels but our capability to monetize. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Flash. Have you ever been unable to deploy your holistic feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We will engage the term "e-business, killer". Our proactive feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based, reality-based structuring and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our transparent feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based real-world, strategic branding and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our sticky feature set is unmatched, but our compelling B2B affiliate-based, collaborative intra-customer-defined CAE monitoring and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to expedite. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be frictionless? We will enable the ability of 24/7, B2B2C research and development to seize. We will harness the ability of returns-on-investment to syndicate. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for coping with new models? Ragan has revolutionized the theory of C2C. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you upgrade holistically then you may also innovate interactively. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think that most revolutionary web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough Unix. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for regulating emerging B2B2C fractal, end-to-end M&A? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think resource-constrained. Think innovative. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also facilitate compellingly. What does the term "e-services" really mean? If you redefine super-mega-virally, you may have to empower intuitively. At Ragan, we believe we know how to expedite efficiently. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our performance but our ability to exploit. A company that can morph defiantly will (someday) be able to deliver courageously. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and J++. We will extend the power of technologies to orchestrate. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of HTTP and JavaScript. We have come to know that if you generate extensibly then you may also synergize seamlessly. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much C++, and not enough XForms.