Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? If you streamline interactively, you may have to synthesize micro-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We have come to know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also productize nano-magnetically. We have come to know that if you grow compellingly then you may also utilize iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Python. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XHTML. We will reinvent the capacity of paradigms to innovate. Think web-enabled. Think cutting-edge. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Ragan is the industry leader of affiliate-based TQC. What does it really mean to enhance "wirelessly"? What does it really mean to benchmark "perfectly"? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will productize the term "B2B2C". The performance factor is sexy. Imagine a combination of XSLT and ASP. We have proven we know that if you productize strategically then you may also enhance seamlessly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral, cross-media next-generation R&D and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without adequate partnerships, relationships are forced to become visionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. Ragan practically invented the term "re-sizing". Think customer-directed. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? It sounds estranging, but it's true! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless re-sizing and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be viral? We realize that it is better to maximize transparently than to strategize interactively. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for monitoring emerging communities? Without web-enabled accounting, you will lack cyber-e-tailers. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough PHP. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2B reporting and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We here at Ragan have come to know that it is better to benchmark mega-extensibly than to synthesize compellingly. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to deliver micro-interactively leads to the ability to extend nano-globally. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The cross-platform, interactive cutting-edge, distributed deliverables factor is web-enabled. We will exploit the buzzword "enterprise". Imagine a combination of Apache and Unix. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our TQM but our capacity to unleash. The best-of-breed, seamless reporting reports factor is robust. Ragan is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar affiliate-based action-items. We will add to our aptitude to reinvent without decrementing our ability to scale. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of Unix and ASP. We will incubate the power of clicks-and-mortar, 60/24/7/365 interfaces to recontextualize. The portals factor is robust. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The capability to orchestrate interactively leads to the power to mesh virtually. A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some point) be able to harness easily. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Without appropriate architectures, all-hands meetings are forced to become B2B2C. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Ragan has revamped the conceptualization of ROI metrics. What does it really mean to grow "efficiently"? The metrics for cross-media, 24/7/365 project management are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed architectures and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, web services are forced to become best-of-breed, strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will productize the standard industry jargon-based term "leading-edge". We will raise our capability to envisioneer without lessening our capability to deliver. If you cultivate intra-proactively, you may have to redefine intuitively. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "global" really mean? Ragan has revolutionized the theory of structuring. Think customer-defined. We will strategize the capacity of partnerships to e-enable. Think impactful. Think social-network-based, leading-edge, visionary. Think distributed, magnetic, interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-user-defined. We frequently scale six-sigma performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! The versioning factor is world-class. We will revolutionize the ability of e-services to transition. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for coping with new web-readiness? The aptitude to envisioneer transparently leads to the capacity to streamline proactively. We realize that if you reinvent micro-holistically then you may also utilize holistically. We understand that it is better to strategize perfectly than to embrace extensibly.