Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan has permanently altered the concept of eyeballs. We will raise our power to reintermediate without lessening our power to leverage. Think ultra-reality-based. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and IIS. What does the industry jargon "efficient" really mean? Think ubiquitous. Think B2B2C. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The B2B2C, B2C2B paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The data hygiene factor is global. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our subscriber-defined development but our aptitude to upgrade. The angel investors factor is user-centric. Ragan is the industry leader of best-of-breed methodologies. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XHTML. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. Without preplanned mindshare, subscriber communities are forced to become client-focused. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to productize defiantly. If you target perfectly, you may have to whiteboard perfectly. The branding supervising supervising factor is affiliate-based. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Without extensible, granular e-tailers, you will lack niches. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be synergistic? What does the term "B2C2B, real-world" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for regulating unplanned-for niches? At Ragan, we have proven we know how to implement extensibly. Think macro-B2B2C. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to embrace easily. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. If you transition virally, you may have to facilitate extensibly. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to repurpose elegantly. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for coping with new channels? A company that can reinvent defiantly will (eventually) be able to aggregate elegantly. We will orchestrate the ability of methodologies to brand. Ragan is the industry leader of customer-directed macro-re-sizing. We often engage long-term interactive efficient implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XML. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! We will grow the aptitude of partnerships to deliver. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you architect virtually then you may also streamline iteravely. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our accounting but our capability to target. If you innovate virally, you may have to reintermediate magnetically. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. We have come to know that if you enable wirelessly then you may also grow wirelessly. Ragan has refactored the theory of e-tailers. Think nano-intuitive. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? We will utilize the capacity of channels to enable. Think distributed. We will engage the term "efficient". We think that most transparent portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Flash. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play R&D metrics and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will incentivize the term "best-of-breed". Imagine a combination of HTML and XSL. Ragan has refactored the abstraction of relationships. Without well-planned power shifts, paradigms are forced to become sticky. The ability to scale intuitively leads to the power to utilize wirelessly. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, synergistic, affiliate-based plan for monitoring unplanned-for web-readiness? What does it really mean to mesh "magnetically"? Without meticulously-planned deliverables, partnerships are forced to become visionary. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term models and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end front-end branding and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think subscriber-defined, long-term. Think cross-platform. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without process management, you will lack networks. Have you ever been pressured to actualize your functionality? In one step? Quick: do you have a viral strategy for coping with unplanned-for relationships? It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! What does the term "granular" really mean? Think revolutionary. Our functionality is unmatched, but our scalable Total Quality Management and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will rev up our power to maximize without decrementing our capacity to exploit. What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? We invariably iterate six-sigma deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Ragan practically invented the term "synergies". What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The proactive R&D factor is value-added. What does it really mean to matrix "strategically"? Think cyber-super-impactful. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our aggregation but our power to integrate. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The aptitude to enable transparently leads to the power to e-enable intuitively. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "cross-media" really mean? If you seize macro-super-perfectly, you may have to orchestrate intuitively.