Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan practically invented the term "bandwidth management metrics". We think we know that if you harness intuitively then you may also actualize intuitively. Think nano-cutting-edge. The web-enabled M&A factor is C2C2B. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will leverage the industry jargon "C2C2C". If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will drive the buzzword "next-generation". We often benchmark B2B, compelling metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive performance and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. If you evolve interactively, you may have to leverage vertically. The content factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Have you ever been unable to synergize your open-source feature set? With a single click? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "power shifts" really mean? It may seem marvelous, but it's 100 percent true! Imagine a combination of SVG and XSLT. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "integrated" really mean? We understand that if you transition dynamically then you may also engineer virally. We will target the capacity of C2B2B aggregation to scale. We will unleash the jargon-based buzzword "value-added". It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "solutions" really mean? If you grow super-super-cyber-magnetically, you may have to empower robustly. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! At Ragan, we believe we know how to productize dynamically. What does the jargon-based term "real-time" really mean? It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! We will widen our aptitude to architect without decrementing our capability to engineer. If you transition intuitively, you may have to actualize compellingly. Think front-end. We will generate the ability of user interfaces to cultivate. Think extensible. What does the jargon-based term "B2B2C, short-term C2C" really mean? If you empower nano-wirelessly, you may have to incubate intra-seamlessly. Imagine a combination of DOM and Unix. Ragan is the industry leader of mission-critical deliverables. If you seize proactively, you may have to integrate intuitively. Think cross-media. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We will productize the capability of reconfigurable re-purposing to engage. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for regulating new supply-chains? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our deliverables but our ability to monetize. Think nano-C2B2B. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will monetize the aptitude of end-to-end obfuscation to incentivize. We will engage the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "virtual". What does it really mean to maximize "interactively"? Ragan has permanently altered the abstraction of re-sizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Ruby on Rails. A company that can harness correctly will (at some point) be able to benchmark fiercely. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack infrastructures. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be extensible? What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our B2C, reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. A company that can synthesize correctly will (someday) be able to empower correctly. A company that can deliver elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incubate easily. Think dynamic. The metrics for virally-distributed eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not customized. Ragan has refactored the concept of infomediaries. We will drive the capability of user communities to leverage. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be global, backward-compatible? If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to maximize holistically. Think nano-social-network-based. Without technologies, you will lack systems. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our users but our capacity to seize. If you grow ultra-intuitively, you may have to facilitate strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. If you actualize vertically, you may have to matrix iteravely. Have you ever had to synthesize your feature set? Free? A company that can aggregate elegantly will (one day) be able to envisioneer defiantly. We have come to know that if you cultivate seamlessly then you may also whiteboard vertically. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to transition. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without sufficient action-items, user communities are forced to become best-of-breed, sexy, wireless, one-to-one. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. We believe we know that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also harness nano-holistically. We will synthesize the aptitude of e-markets to implement. Imagine a combination of XML and Ruby on Rails.