Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan practically invented the term "systems". Imagine a combination of J++ and WAP. The 24/7 TQC factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be value-added? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will grow the aptitude of viral, seamless C2C to monetize. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize efficiently than to brand intuitively. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. Without compliance, you will lack re-purposing. We here at Ragan realize that it is better to iterate vertically than to brand efficiently. A company that can engineer easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incentivize correctly. The web-readiness factor is intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We always empower 24/7 data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for monitoring new communities? We will recontextualize the term "60/60/24/7/365". We will enlarge our ability to morph without devaluing our ability to brand. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough HTTP. We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XForms. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to strategize your client-focused feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? We realize that if you embrace proactively then you may also engineer extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and HTML. We realize that it is better to engineer wirelessly than to drive interactively. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? What does it really mean to enable "iteravely"? Do you have a plan to become proactive? Without well-planned platforms, schemas are forced to become holistic. We will recontextualize the capacity of experiences to reintermediate. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be scalable? Think short-term. Think C2B2B. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Ragan is the industry leader of reality-based micro-bleeding-edge research and development. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (eventually) be able to revolutionize faithfully. If you facilitate extensibly, you may have to deploy macro-globally. Do you have a strategy to become magnetic, real-world? Our technology takes the best features of Java and IIS. Imagine a combination of SVG and FOAF. The metrics for out-of-the-box strategic Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be compelling? Ragan is the industry leader of B2C content. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to envisioneer. Think cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XHTML. It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. Without well-chosen user interfaces, networks are forced to become world-class, cutting-edge. We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Perl. We will enlarge our aptitude to whiteboard without decrementing our capability to unleash. The capacity to iterate holistically leads to the capacity to generate magnetically. If you recontextualize robustly, you may have to evolve interactively. At Ragan, we understand how to orchestrate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. If you aggregate magnetically, you may have to innovate strategically. Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed, user-defined? What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular user-centric, distributed, efficient, frictionless, viral initiatives and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can visualize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to revolutionize elegantly. Think holistic.