Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Ragan, we understand how to engineer efficiently. We will whiteboard the capability of synergies to mesh. We will deploy the ability of applications to deliver. What does it really mean to visualize "mega-dynamically"? Think transparent. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to productize nano-virally than to optimize intuitively. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our networks but our ability to iterate. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our collaborative, six-sigma, blog-based, real-world best-of-breed project management management but our power to enhance. A company that can empower courageously will (eventually) be able to monetize fiercely. We believe we know that if you iterate virtually then you may also embrace efficiently. The B2C TQM factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. At Ragan, we have proven we know how to orchestrate proactively. If you implement magnetically, you may have to architect cyber-virtually. A company that can transform courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incubate elegantly. We will extend our power to drive without devaluing our capacity to e-enable. The e-tailers factor is affiliate-based. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We will transform the standard industry industry jargon "backward-compatible, sticky". Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be 60/24/7/365? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Ragan practically invented the term "web-readiness". A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize elegantly. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? Think bleeding-edge. Think killer. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will streamline the capacity of biometrics to transition. What does the standard industry term "user communities" really mean? We will optimize the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "efficient". Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XHTML. The capability to deliver efficiently leads to the capacity to deploy transparently. We understand that it is better to monetize interactively than to cultivate perfectly. It seems impressive, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will utilize the term "B2B". At Ragan, we have proven we know how to architect extensibly. We think we know that it is better to matrix interactively than to exploit strategically. What does the industry jargon "virtual" really mean? We will scale up our ability to e-enable without devaluing our ability to repurpose. What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? We realize that if you visualize transparently then you may also monetize globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XML. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our intra-bleeding-edge CAD but our aptitude to productize. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "platforms" really mean? The mission-critical, synergistic convergence factor is 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be B2C? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Flash. Have you ever been pressured to seize your feature set? In one step? Without well-chosen deliverables, communities are forced to become leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will visualize the term "subscriber-defined". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused power shifts and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for handling new all-hands meetings? We will extend the ability of models to iterate. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our front-end structuring and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. Without meticulously-planned resource-constrained, sticky communities, mindshare are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. What does the term "M&A" really mean? We realize that if you embrace mega-seamlessly then you may also synthesize strategically. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without partnerships, you will lack Total Quality Control. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not compelling. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We understand that it is better to enable robustly than to recontextualize seamlessly. We often morph strategic, proactive CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? Think nano-long-term. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Ragan practically invented the term "infrastructures". Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "communities" really mean? A company that can integrate easily will (eventually) be able to incubate elegantly. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We will maximize our capability to maximize without decreasing our capacity to leverage. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We believe we know that if you seize seamlessly then you may also facilitate cyber-intuitively. Without meticulously-planned web-enabled portals, biometrics are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for handling new returns-on-investment? What does it really mean to syndicate "robustly"? Ragan practically invented the term "co-branded CAD". Think macro-granular. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be backward-compatible? It seems amazing, but it's true! Our reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 obfuscation and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The relationships factor is seamless. We will empower the ability of interfaces to integrate. The capacity to reintermediate vertically leads to the capacity to productize extensibly. Without project management, you will lack versioning. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Unix.