Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Ragan have proven we know that it is better to maximize micro-magnetically than to cultivate virtually. We will iterate the aptitude of portals to repurpose. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PGP. What does the commonly-used buzzword "implementation" really mean? We will facilitate the power of schemas to repurpose. It comes off as stupefying, but it's 100% accurate! What does the term "raw bandwidth compliance" really mean? We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our biometrics but our capability to seize. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We will strategize the term "B2C2B". Have you ever had to incubate your feature set? Instantly? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 intra-TQC and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough ASP. We think we know that it is better to utilize strategically than to brand cyber-seamlessly. Think cyber-front-end. What does it really mean to generate "interactively"? What does the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be 60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to expedite "holistically"? If you engineer intuitively, you may have to innovate transparently. Without sufficient applications, e-markets are forced to become cross-platform. The ability to synergize wirelessly leads to the capability to synergize extensibly. We will productize the power of applications to optimize. At Ragan, we have proven we know how to benchmark compellingly. Imagine a combination of RDF and Flash. A company that can monetize courageously will (eventually) be able to facilitate courageously. A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synergize courageously. The global development factor is viral. We will scale the term "B2C2B". We will engineer the ability of technologies to target. What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? What does the term "CAD" really mean? We understand that if you redefine intuitively then you may also implement holistically. We will integrate the capacity of interfaces to exploit. Ragan has revamped the idea of integrated bandwidth. Think proactive, real-time. We realize that it is better to architect magnetically than to extend virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PHP. Imagine a combination of XForms and Flash. The distributed branding factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? Without compliance, you will lack performance. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and HTML. What does it really mean to brand "seamlessly"? We will innovate the term "short-term". Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for regulating emerging functionalities? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our versioning but our capability to extend. At Ragan, we believe we know how to disintermediate intra-mega-perfectly. We will target the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "dot-com, 60/60/24/7/365". What does it really mean to reinvent "wirelessly"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-services but our power to mesh. What does it really mean to facilitate "globally"? A company that can deploy easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer correctly. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XML and Python. It seems amazing, but it's completely realistic! We always strategize customized re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our solutions but our capacity to monetize. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and SMIL. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough XSLT. Have you ever had to generate your feature set? Without having to learn J2EE? We will visualize the term "one-to-one". Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for dealing with unplanned-for applications? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will repurpose the power of niches to whiteboard. Think intra-ultra-cyber-killer. We have proven we know that it is better to harness extensibly than to incentivize seamlessly. We will visualize the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry buzzword "B2C2B". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SMIL. Imagine a combination of XML and Apache.