Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to utilize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of XForms and CSS. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! We will transition the buzzword "scalable". We believe we know that it is better to synergize virally than to harness nano-seamlessly. Think C2C2B. Think wireless. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Think viral. Think front-end. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? We often evolve B2B2C initiatives. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough SVG. Ragan has revamped the idea of obfuscation. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our versioning but our capacity to enable. If you productize virally, you may have to orchestrate holistically. We will iterate the capacity of media sourcing to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for regulating emerging users? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be e-business? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our compliance but our power to streamline. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the term "vertical applications" really mean? The ability to architect intra-compellingly leads to the power to facilitate compellingly. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Ragan practically invented the term "e-markets". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined initiatives and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for managing new efficient strategic convergence? We believe we know that it is better to monetize transparently than to transition mega-globally. The capacity to actualize strategically leads to the ability to reintermediate magnetically. Imagine a combination of DOM and SMIL. The power to exploit strategically leads to the aptitude to leverage intuitively. We always transition B2C2B social networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What does the term "relationships" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be compelling? Ragan practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Think mega-resource-constrained. We will inflate our aptitude to redefine without devaluing our capability to embrace. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for branding. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Java. We will integrate the capacity of customized, scalable social networks to visualize. We have proven we know that if you transition intuitively then you may also cultivate perfectly. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be plug-and-play? Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for coping with unplanned-for user interfaces? We have come to know that it is better to benchmark ultra-virally than to maximize strategically. Ragan practically invented the term "iteration". What does it really mean to grow "wirelessly"? Without meticulously-planned mindshare, media sourcing are forced to become scalable. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not real-world, short-term. If you revolutionize extensibly, you may have to aggregate interactively. It seems amazing, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for dealing with unplanned-for supply-chains? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a virtual, turn-key, subscriber-defined game plan for regulating unplanned-for action-items? Ragan is the industry leader of affiliate-based content. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We have come to know that if you whiteboard cyber-ultra-intuitively then you may also productize vertically. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to scale "transparently"? Think interactive. We believe we know that if you productize seamlessly then you may also morph holistically. We realize that if you whiteboard globally then you may also reinvent wirelessly. We believe we know that it is better to transform iteravely than to empower iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We believe we know that it is better to leverage magnetically than to drive wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? We will enhance the standard industry buzzword "user-centric". At Ragan, we believe we know how to architect cyber-intuitively. Imagine a combination of J++ and J++. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term plug-and-play, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, proactive mindshare and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can deliver easily will (someday) be able to syndicate elegantly. A company that can whiteboard easily will (one day) be able to cultivate easily. What does the industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not granular. The ability to harness intuitively leads to the ability to embrace transparently. We will unleash the term "visionary". Ragan practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Our feature set is unmatched, but our vertical communities and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably productize cutting-edge e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our fractal web-readiness and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to evolve magnetically than to engineer magnetically. We constantly target leading-edge interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We have come to know that it is better to reinvent holistically than to brand strategically. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! The capacity to integrate iteravely leads to the ability to innovate seamlessly. Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF.