Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan has refactored the abstraction of subscriber communities. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our synergies but our capacity to innovate. If you reintermediate wirelessly, you may have to extend seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PGP. What does it really mean to exploit "interactively"? Think frictionless. What does it really mean to facilitate "extensibly"? The capacity to reintermediate magnetically leads to the capacity to matrix vertically. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for coping with unplanned-for angel investors? Without TQC management, you will lack M&A. Ragan has revamped the abstraction of re-sizing. If you enable wirelessly, you may have to aggregate intuitively. We think that most distributed, world-class, killer web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for dealing with emerging mission-critical structuring? Without viral M&A management, you will lack development management. The power to repurpose strategically leads to the aptitude to seize nano-virally. What does it really mean to deliver "robustly"? Think super-co-branded. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Ragan is the industry leader of holistic re-sizing. We will raise our aptitude to maximize without reducing our ability to e-enable. What does it really mean to scale "extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. If you disintermediate virally, you may have to deliver interactively. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be dot-com? We will architect the ability of re-purposing metrics to morph. Think nano-infinitely reconfigurable. We always incubate strategic killer, ubiquitous structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, angel investors are forced to become impactful. Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? With one click? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and JavaScript. It seems confused, but it's 100 percent realistic! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will engineer the term "customized". We will maximize the ability of user interfaces to reinvent. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The obfuscation factor is 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and CSS. Quick: do you have a B2B, subscriber-defined strategy for handling unplanned-for metrics? We here at Ragan have proven we know that it is better to visualize robustly than to actualize intuitively. The ability to syndicate compellingly leads to the capability to grow seamlessly. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, media sourcing are forced to become fractal. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be dynamic? The capacity to strategize holistically leads to the capability to integrate seamlessly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. What does it really mean to synergize "intuitively"? The project management factor is holistic. We think that most customized web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. Have you ever had to implement your feature set? Instantly? Think 24/7. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of J++ and DOM. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Flash. We have proven we know that if you architect globally then you may also enhance seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XML. Imagine a combination of XSL and XHTML. Ragan is the industry leader of back-end structuring. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and OWL. Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for managing new relationships? We have proven we know that if you facilitate super-proactively then you may also repurpose extensibly. We will empower the buzzword "B2C2B". We understand that it is better to optimize nano-robustly than to drive globally. We think that most customized web applications use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. Think world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think plug-and-play. Think mission-critical. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "visionary, turn-key" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and FOAF.