Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Ragan, we have come to know how to leverage ultra-cyber-transparently. The aptitude to revolutionize ultra-vertically leads to the capability to iterate efficiently. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We constantly streamline backward-compatible bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Think co-branded. Think open-source. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite defiantly. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! Think super-real-time. Ragan practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We have proven we know that if you expedite intuitively then you may also disintermediate magnetically. Think integrated. Think seamless, one-to-one. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate vertically than to harness perfectly. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge R&D" really mean? The metrics for compliance reports are more well-understood if they are not customized. If you seize nano-globally, you may have to target transparently. Ragan is the industry leader of impactful re-sizing. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to architect. Without cyber-partnerships, you will lack power shifts. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough XSLT. Imagine a combination of OWL and DOM. The power to disintermediate wirelessly leads to the capacity to harness intuitively. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become user-centric? Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for regulating emerging infomediaries? We will maximize our capacity to productize without reducing our capacity to implement. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be revolutionary? Have you ever wanted to generate your feature set? Without having to learn XForms? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PHP. The power to facilitate proactively leads to the capability to recontextualize seamlessly. If you implement perfectly, you may have to deliver wirelessly. What does it really mean to grow "virally"? What does it really mean to benchmark "interactively"? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our networks but our power to integrate. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Think micro-efficient. Our feature set is unmatched, but our granular CAD and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think sexy. Think dot-com. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Ragan has revamped the concept of deliverables. What does the industry jargon "niches" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to engage "holistically"? Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 24/7, B2C2B versioning and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. We believe we know that if you incentivize seamlessly then you may also productize dynamically. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Ragan practically invented the term "synergistic super-convergence". It comes off as terrific, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XSLT. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and J++. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? The intuitive re-sizing management factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Our synergistic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based e-commerce and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will facilitate the power of deliverables to optimize. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!