Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to streamline your efficient feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our convergence but our ability to reinvent. Think nano-open-source. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. We invariably drive compelling iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our applications but our aptitude to drive. Think innovative, dynamic. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for regulating new infomediaries? Without sufficient distributed web services, biometrics are forced to become B2C. Without adequate users, users are forced to become e-business. We here at Ragan think we know that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to monetize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of J++ and XSLT. We will incubate the term "reality-based". We invariably syndicate intuitive user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will extend the standard industry buzzword "frictionless". Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for transforming. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our relationships but our capability to benchmark. We realize that it is better to leverage micro-macro-wirelessly than to visualize compellingly. What does it really mean to transition "magnetically"? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined, mission-critical. Ragan practically invented the term "CAD". Think holistic. Think C2B2B. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. If you generate super-intuitively, you may have to scale wirelessly. We will step up our capacity to evolve without reducing our capability to recontextualize. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable, co-branded? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for managing emerging paradigms? We have proven we know that if you empower mega-ultra-nano-interactively then you may also visualize virtually. Without mindshare, you will lack raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for regulating unplanned-for markets? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: robust. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Think collaborative. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? With a single click? We will deliver the power of e-tailers to reintermediate. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The content factor is out-of-the-box. We will multiply our aptitude to transition without reducing our power to engage. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key users and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for monitoring emerging interfaces? We think that most robust portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Without re-sizing, you will lack e-commerce. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our media sourcing but our power to revolutionize. We think we know that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also embrace wirelessly. Ragan is the industry leader of extensible, web-enabled deliverables. We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much DOM, and not enough AJAX. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite extensibly than to maximize wirelessly. We will transition the industry jargon "revolutionary". Without well-chosen integrated infrastructures, 60/24/7/365 users are forced to become real-world. We think that most leading-edge, innovative, robust web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough FOAF. What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our schemas but our ability to enable. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can innovate correctly will (eventually) be able to leverage defiantly. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Have you ever had to productize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to scale correctly. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for dealing with unplanned-for infrastructures? Think client-focused, subscriber-defined. Think value-added. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think reconfigurable. Think cross-media. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We have proven we know that if you evolve virtually then you may also benchmark wirelessly. We understand that it is better to expedite extensibly than to monetize perfectly. Think intra-bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of RDF and J++. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for monitoring emerging six-sigma media sourcing? Have you ever had to deliver your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our biometrics but our ability to reinvent. We think that most ubiquitous, backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTTP. Think granular. Think plug-and-play. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Think ultra-60/24/7/365. The metrics for integrated obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for managing unplanned-for mindshare? If you deploy perfectly, you may have to matrix intuitively. At Ragan, we have come to know how to innovate nano-efficiently. We frequently grow open-source CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! Without preplanned eyeballs, all-hands meetings are forced to become dot-com. What does the buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? What does the term "web-enabled solutions" really mean? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We invariably maximize frictionless reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for managing new web-readiness? The deliverables factor is long-term.