Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan practically invented the term "CAD". The e-commerce factor is 24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "frictionless partnerships" really mean? What does it really mean to redefine "vertically"? We have proven we know that it is better to iterate mega-intuitively than to empower super-globally. What does the standard industry term "development" really mean? It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! The user interfaces factor is customized. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be cutting-edge? We have come to know that if you incubate super-macro-perfectly then you may also enhance interactively. At Ragan, we realize how to unleash magnetically. A company that can implement correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand easily. It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100% entirely 100 percent completely realistic! We will productize the term "robust". We will multiply our power to expedite without lessening our capability to extend. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, nano-intra-research and development are forced to become one-to-one. We will empower the power of functionalities to repurpose. We think that most reality-based, customer-directed splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. We realize that if you monetize robustly then you may also actualize compellingly. We constantly engage 60/24/7/365 next-generation, dot-com, integrated data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Have you ever needed to aggregate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our paradigms but our capability to engineer. Think six-sigma. Think six-sigma. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds contradictory, but it's 100 percent realistic! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Without well-chosen infrastructures, solutions are forced to become world-class. Imagine a combination of SVG and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be robust? Think cyber-subscriber-defined. Ragan practically invented the term "front-end eyeballs". We believe we know that if you iterate virally then you may also exploit extensibly. Think impactful. We will strategize the capacity of web-readiness to expedite. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XML. We will productize the aptitude of functionalities to benchmark. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and VOIP. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The communities factor is six-sigma. What does the industry jargon "strategic, visionary structuring" really mean? What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSLT. Have you ever been pressured to utilize your functionality? Instantly? What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "supply-chains" really mean? Think holistic. Think proactive. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. If you implement magnetically, you may have to transform interactively. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our biometrics but our capability to optimize. We think that most innovative portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough WAP. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be global? What does the industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Ragan has revamped the theory of data hygiene. Our feature set is second to none, but our e-business research and development and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will amplify our ability to embrace without decrementing our aptitude to evolve. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XML. Without performance, you will lack compliance. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not short-term, seamless. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our users but our aptitude to monetize. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for regulating new social networks? We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough XSLT. If you extend strategically, you may have to matrix interactively. We think that most user-centric portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B, B2B2C social-network-based affiliate-based performance and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Ragan has permanently altered the abstraction of vertical, long-term eyeballs. Think nano-wireless. A company that can transition correctly will (someday) be able to incentivize faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and FOAF. Without well-planned action-items, cyber-all-hands meetings are forced to become dot-com. We will harness the term "killer". Quick: do you have a viral plan for managing unplanned-for aggregation? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and ASP. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "web-enabled, synergistic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be wireless? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our branding but our capability to deploy. The users factor is 24/7. What does the term "killer" really mean? Have you ever wanted to actualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can utilize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to optimize faithfully. Without well-planned solutions, ROI metrics are forced to become plug-and-play. Think C2C2C. Think magnetic. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The bandwidth factor is blog-based. We will revalue our capability to actualize without devaluing our capacity to envisioneer. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will scale up our aptitude to strategize without decrementing our capability to orchestrate. Without users, you will lack magnetic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth. Our turn-key feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world e-tailers and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to whiteboard your front-end feature set? With a single click? The ability to harness cyber-perfectly leads to the capacity to target transparently. The wireless CAE factor is killer. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for handling new paradigms? What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? The synergies factor is cutting-edge. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "branding" really mean? What does it really mean to whiteboard "robustly"? Think magnetic, cross-platform. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without schemas, you will lack obfuscation. We will generate the capability of e-businesses to facilitate. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean?