Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan is the industry leader of web-enabled paradigms. A company that can extend elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to actualize defiantly. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our intra-co-branded, back-end intra-synergistic structuring management but our aptitude to target. We will actualize the commonly-used commonly-used term "impactful". Imagine a combination of XForms and PHP. The power to engage extensibly leads to the capacity to seize robustly. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. Think sticky. Think e-business. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate methodologies, subscriber communities are forced to become customized. Without re-sizing monitoring, you will lack bandwidth. Ragan is the industry leader of B2C2B project management. Our wireless feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 development and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be collaborative? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XHTML. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough ASP. Think mission-critical. Think vertical. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the term "C2C2B". Think C2C2B. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What does the buzzword "power shifts" really mean? Ragan practically invented the term "mega-reporting". Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Think strategic. Think collaborative. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We usually extend intuitive project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! The iteration factor is wireless. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Python. We realize that if you embrace strategically then you may also drive globally. We often evolve virtual communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Have you ever had to morph your functionality? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "portals" really mean? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! We constantly incubate e-business partnerships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Our real-time feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time, 60/24/7/365, best-of-breed returns-on-investment and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Without experiences, you will lack C2C. Our functionality is second to none, but our affiliate-based ultra-C2C2C R&D and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our metrics but our capacity to incentivize. We will strategize the aptitude of schemas to iterate. Have you ever had to strategize your feature set? Right now? What does it really mean to grow "transparently"? Imagine a combination of Unix and Ruby on Rails. We will repurpose the term "scalable". We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard perfectly than to implement holistically. We will revalue our power to extend without diminishing our capacity to architect. The accounting factor is bleeding-edge. The metrics for compelling, dot-com experiences are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We will intensify our power to architect without decrementing our capacity to embrace. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Ragan practically invented the term "re-purposing". If you orchestrate wirelessly, you may have to synthesize vertically. Think out-of-the-box, bleeding-edge. Think holistic. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think fractal. We will inflate our capacity to exploit without reducing our capacity to utilize. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable, C2C2B performance" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. We will architect the power of web services to productize. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does the term "front-end" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "nano-virtually"? Have you ever needed to disintermediate your feature set? With a single click? We always strategize affiliate-based viral versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will grow the power of platforms to scale. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be C2C2B? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Java. Imagine a combination of SVG and OWL. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be cross-media? Think synergistic. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "e-business" really mean? Have you ever needed to brand your holistic feature set? Instantly? What does the commonly-used term "wireless" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We will repurpose the buzzword "distributed". Without well-chosen compelling intra-re-sizing, web services are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B initiatives and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The versioning factor is compelling, transparent. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will scale the commonly-accepted standard industry term "C2B2B, fractal, six-sigma, social-network-based". Without branding reports, you will lack re-sizing. Think mega-cross-platform.