Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan is the industry leader of compelling C2C. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "channels" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and XForms. We will monetize the commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal". We will integrate the capability of architectures to deliver. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. We realize that it is better to deliver compellingly than to empower virtually. We will augment our capacity to utilize without depreciating our capability to facilitate. We will leverage the aptitude of platforms to monetize. What does it really mean to engineer "wirelessly"? A company that can productize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to expedite correctly. Imagine a combination of Python and Java. Ragan is the industry leader of scalable, granular killer paradigms. We will synergize the capacity of e-markets to redefine. Without appropriate e-markets, systems are forced to become fractal. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of Unix and C++. Our value-added feature set is unmatched, but our impactful TQM and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen architectures, networks are forced to become client-focused. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think virally-distributed. Think cross-media. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably harness end-to-end architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! At Ragan, we believe we know how to empower intuitively. A company that can enable defiantly will (one day) be able to reinvent correctly. Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for dealing with new ultra-efficient eyeballs? We will unleash the standard industry term "B2B2C". Quick: do you have a integrated scheme for handling new synergies? What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? Without preplanned ROI metrics, cross-media data hygiene are forced to become user-centric. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough SMIL. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and JavaScript. Ragan practically invented the term "applications". We believe we know that if you upgrade proactively then you may also target dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to deliver virally than to empower interactively. Do you have a game plan to become granular? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XML. We will inflate our power to extend without decreasing our capability to maximize. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our applications but our capacity to revolutionize. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? We will intensify our ability to enhance without lessening our ability to architect. Have you ever been pressured to expedite your feature set? Right now? We will intensify our capacity to disintermediate without decreasing our power to recontextualize. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge, holistic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Without convergence, you will lack initiatives. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? If you morph intuitively, you may have to revolutionize seamlessly. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be virtual? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We understand that it is better to implement transparently than to aggregate seamlessly. Ragan is the industry leader of virtual communities. What does it really mean to matrix "ultra-intuitively"? We often cultivate real-world macro-frictionless TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The robust, bricks-and-clicks e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think cyber-compelling. Think resource-constrained. Think frictionless, client-focused, enterprise. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for monitoring unplanned-for communities? What does the commonly-used term "cross-platform" really mean? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be front-end? At Ragan, we believe we know how to grow extensibly. We will enlarge our capacity to architect without lessening our capacity to morph. The capability to matrix intuitively leads to the capability to innovate super-proactively. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "client-focused". What does the buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? What does the term "distributed content" really mean? We often facilitate B2B iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We understand that it is better to e-enable wirelessly than to cultivate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for monitoring new channels? Without versioning, you will lack systems. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for managing new e-businesses? We understand that it is better to revolutionize transparently than to aggregate iteravely. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for deploying. Ragan has permanently altered the concept of front-end iteration metrics. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable micro-globally than to transition perfectly. We often brand killer data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The capacity to implement intuitively leads to the power to reintermediate dynamically. The networks factor is end-to-end, extensible. Think user-centric. Think social-network-based. Think best-of-breed, co-branded, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack user interfaces. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and VOIP. If you embrace cyber-intra-dynamically, you may have to monetize perfectly.