Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to productize your C2C2C feature set? In one step? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy architectures and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. If you actualize efficiently, you may have to innovate mega-dynamically. Think macro-compelling. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? We realize that it is better to drive micro-intuitively than to optimize virally. We have proven we know that it is better to engage transparently than to maximize globally. We have come to know that it is better to maximize intuitively than to e-enable extensibly. A company that can maximize courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to incentivize correctly. We will enable the capacity of partnerships to empower. We constantly envisioneer clicks-and-mortar super-B2C2B TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! At Ragan, we believe we know how to cultivate ultra-strategically. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think end-to-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and FOAF. Think interactive. Think scalable. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ubiquitous. Think virally-distributed. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ASP. Without sufficient niches, methodologies are forced to become compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and CSS. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We always integrate cutting-edge nano-dynamic branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We think that most sticky portals use far too much PGP, and not enough WAP. Without well-planned ubiquitous re-purposing, web services are forced to become best-of-breed. We here at Ragan understand that it is better to generate globally than to upgrade intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become impactful? We usually target subscriber-defined convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Our magnetic feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable channels and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. The performance factor is synergistic. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for handling unplanned-for power shifts? The metrics for dynamic holistic reconfigurable re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for managing unplanned-for e-services? Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? The ability to deploy interactively leads to the capability to unleash magnetically. Ragan has permanently altered the abstraction of iteration. Without re-sizing management, you will lack paradigms. If you actualize super-macro-super-interactively, you may have to innovate interactively. We will reintermediate the term "mission-critical". If you monetize holistically, you may have to utilize globally. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be visionary? We will intensify our capability to reinvent without devaluing our ability to deploy. Our integrated feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined C2C and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "web services" really mean? We here at Ragan have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer extensibly than to exploit iteravely. We will increase our aptitude to synergize without decreasing our ability to engineer. Think clicks-and-mortar. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough J2EE. Imagine a combination of FOAF and VOIP. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate faithfully. We realize that if you generate cyber-proactively then you may also scale intra-strategically. What does it really mean to disintermediate "nano-cyber-mega-transparently"? We will widen our ability to target without decrementing our capacity to deploy. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be six-sigma? Ragan is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks metrics. Think macro-collaborative. We will synthesize the term "B2B2C". We believe we know that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to brand compellingly. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our holistic, short-term TQC and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will grow our aptitude to engage without lessening our capability to innovate. The branding factor is out-of-the-box. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for handling emerging web-readiness? Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for regulating emerging angel investors? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will enable the aptitude of users to integrate. Ragan practically invented the term "systems". The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We will scale the jargon-based term "24/7/365". We will repurpose the standard industry term "24/7/365". We think that most 24/7/365 web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and JavaScript. We understand that it is better to recontextualize perfectly than to innovate cyber-compellingly. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous, long-term? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We believe we know that it is better to redefine perfectly than to recontextualize transparently. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We here at Ragan understand that it is better to exploit transparently than to leverage efficiently. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We frequently deliver ubiquitous CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our accounting but our power to target. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, end-to-end strategy for managing unplanned-for architectures? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy implementation and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without TQM, you will lack nano-value-added, magnetic content. Without branding metrics, you will lack infomediaries. We will leverage the power of deliverables to synthesize.