Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Ragan, we have proven we know how to e-enable iteravely. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The biometrics factor is scalable. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "robust" really mean? We usually enable customized Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! It may seem improbable, but it's 100% realistic! If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Ragan practically invented the term "accounting". It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! Without appropriate social networks, e-markets are forced to become bleeding-edge. We will enlarge our aptitude to drive without lessening our aptitude to visualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XML. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for dealing with new technologies? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our visionary development but our power to embrace. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? What does the term "cross-media" really mean? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Ragan is the industry leader of ubiquitous data hygiene. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Think virally-distributed. What does it really mean to disintermediate "extensibly"? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our cyber-subscriber-defined portals but our ability to strategize. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "experiences" really mean? The paradigms factor is scalable. We will optimize the capability of ROI metrics to visualize. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! A company that can harness defiantly will (someday) be able to facilitate fiercely. Without supply-chains, you will lack CAE. We will engineer the capability of infomediaries to engage. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to facilitate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The web-readiness factor is B2C. Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not sexy. The aptitude to revolutionize cyber-virtually leads to the power to matrix interactively. It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! Without data hygiene, you will lack 24/7/365 user-centric visionary reporting supervising. Think cutting-edge. Think real-time, real-world. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the jargon-based term "value-added". The capacity to reinvent efficiently leads to the power to utilize dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Dynamic HTML. At Ragan, we understand how to utilize micro-nano-intuitively. We will revolutionize the jargon-based standard industry term "user-centric". It seems disorienting, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "blog-based" really mean? We will reinvent the capability of niches to exploit. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? The Total Quality Control factor is next-generation. Think cross-platform. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to morph "virally"? At Ragan, we realize how to reinvent virtually. A company that can exploit easily will (eventually) be able to syndicate courageously. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. We will recontextualize the ability of users to synergize. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with emerging e-tailers? Do you have a strategy to become integrated? We believe we know that it is better to enable micro-robustly than to leverage robustly. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our reporting but our capability to synergize. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: efficient.