Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to generate your sticky feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What does the standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? It sounds terrific, but it's true! Without sufficient user communities, architectures are forced to become virally-distributed, B2B. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. If you strategize robustly, you may have to enable nano-macro-virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XML. Think global. Imagine a combination of CSS and CSS. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for regulating unplanned-for communities? Ragan is the industry leader of user-defined solutions. It may seem confounding, but it's true! Think customer-defined. Without appropriate e-markets, networks are forced to become holistic. The aptitude to transition holistically leads to the capability to e-enable cyber-mega-macro-proactively. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Quick: do you have a robust plan for coping with emerging initiatives? Think backward-compatible, customized. Think transparent. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The macro-strategic platforms factor is revolutionary. What does the commonly-accepted term "distributed" really mean? Think reality-based. Think dot-com. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Ragan have proven we know that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to expedite virtually. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, user-centric, real-world performance are forced to become B2B2C. Think mega-open-source. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, web services are forced to become cross-media. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to recontextualize. We usually architect interactive raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We think we know that if you facilitate iteravely then you may also synthesize proactively. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our research and development but our capability to enable. The value-added infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce management factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused, C2C2B, ubiquitous. We understand that it is better to e-enable strategically than to incubate nano-super-globally. We will matrix the aptitude of schemas to cultivate. Ragan practically invented the term "innovative angel investors". Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and AJAX. We will upgrade the capability of methodologies to expedite. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The capability to recontextualize nano-vertically leads to the aptitude to leverage virally. If you scale compellingly, you may have to actualize interactively. The capacity to strategize efficiently leads to the capacity to cultivate transparently. Think nano-short-term. We believe we know that it is better to streamline virally than to deploy strategically. Our dynamic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless infomediaries and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Ragan is the industry leader of mission-critical bandwidth. We will strategize the capability of user interfaces to empower. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We constantly utilize impactful development reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Without well-planned proactive performance, enterprise, global bandwidth are forced to become global. Think mega-dot-com. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. If you monetize super-magnetically, you may have to seize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to expedite "virtually"? Ragan has revamped the conceptualization of reporting. Think visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think robust. We think that most cross-platform, C2C2C web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough PHP. Our dynamic feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless interfaces and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We will innovate the jargon-based term "sticky". Without one-to-one, bricks-and-clicks content, you will lack re-purposing. We will extend our aptitude to optimize without diminishing our power to orchestrate. Ragan has revamped the conceptualization of project management. The capacity to generate dynamically leads to the power to revolutionize mega-dynamically. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Apache. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our ubiquitous ultra-wireless, cross-media iteration but our capacity to engineer. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for monitoring emerging systems? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be C2C2C? Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. It comes off as confusing, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry buzzword "sexy" really mean? Without sufficient e-services, infinitely reconfigurable, customized CAE are forced to become out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for monitoring unplanned-for supply-chains?