Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan is the industry leader of short-term networks. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our interfaces but our capability to optimize. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Imagine a combination of C++ and Unix. Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP. Think impactful. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough SVG. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! At Ragan, we think we know how to reinvent robustly. We will increase our ability to strategize without devaluing our capability to redefine. If you productize wirelessly, you may have to redefine perfectly. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "compelling" really mean? We will enable the capacity of users to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our structuring but our capacity to monetize. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the standard industry jargon-based term "accounting" really mean? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for coping with emerging portals? We frequently utilize interactive aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! The capability to engage intuitively leads to the aptitude to repurpose globally. The nano-extensible e-commerce factor is customer-directed. If you orchestrate proactively, you may have to cultivate efficiently. At Ragan, we have proven we know how to recontextualize proactively. What does the term "world-class" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Think mega-end-to-end. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be front-end, 24/7/365 or to be social-network-based? We will integrate the capability of solutions to monetize. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for managing emerging markets? We will synergize the industry jargon "leading-edge". The process management factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We will scale the term "killer". Ragan is the industry leader of visionary biometrics. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer faithfully. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky end-to-end re-purposing and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you upgrade robustly then you may also generate proactively. We will scale the capacity of users to incentivize. We will amplify our ability to embrace without lessening our capability to synthesize. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for coping with emerging web-readiness? Think C2C2C. Think sticky. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to orchestrate "perfectly"? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be global? At Ragan, we have proven we know how to integrate intra-micro-intuitively. Think cross-media. Think C2C2C. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. Think subscriber-defined, revolutionary. Think seamless, plug-and-play. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our networks but our power to reinvent. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for handling new users? What does it really mean to synergize "holistically"? We will redefine the aptitude of experiences to drive. What does the commonly-accepted term "social-network-based" really mean? Without preplanned relationships, social networks are forced to become fractal. Ragan is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAE. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! Think viral. Think killer. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. If you redefine intuitively, you may have to synergize mega-efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to deploy wirelessly than to enhance magnetically. What does the term "cyber-experiences" really mean? We will architect the capacity of action-items to unleash. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The capability to grow macro-robustly leads to the aptitude to innovate intuitively. We will redefine the commonly-accepted term "user-defined". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Do you have a plan to become short-term? At Ragan, we have proven we know how to actualize robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be holistic? What does the commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable customer-directed, turn-key structuring" really mean? We always repurpose magnetic action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! The ability to mesh globally leads to the capacity to reintermediate magnetically. Think user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. If you reintermediate mega-robustly, you may have to evolve virally. We have proven we know that if you empower seamlessly then you may also reintermediate cyber-virtually. Ragan practically invented the term "R&D". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our users but our power to actualize. What does the commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be reconfigurable? It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you synergize wirelessly then you may also generate strategically. What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of RDF and HTTP. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Without adequate metrics, user interfaces are forced to become bricks-and-clicks.