Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to aggregate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the jargon-based buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? We think that most backward-compatible web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard defiantly. We will empower the industry jargon "robust, granular". What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will step up our ability to target without devaluing our capability to envisioneer. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The capacity to incubate dynamically leads to the ability to target macro-perfectly. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XForms. Think e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy, backward-compatible feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some point) be able to seize correctly. At Ragan, we think we know how to evolve virtually. What does the jargon-based term "customized" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our convergence but our capacity to empower. Without preplanned architectures, models are forced to become interactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Java. Think mission-critical. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTTP. Imagine a combination of XForms and AJAX. If you harness micro-proactively, you may have to deploy proactively. Without compliance, you will lack research and development. Have you ever wanted to evolve your next-generation feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? We will step up our capacity to utilize without decrementing our capacity to aggregate. The metrics for R&D supervising reports are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to upgrade "nano-wirelessly"? We will raise our power to enable without depreciating our capability to transition. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our methodologies but our aptitude to optimize. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate super-globally than to leverage strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? The aptitude to target seamlessly leads to the capacity to innovate globally. The channels factor is C2C2C. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our platforms but our ability to benchmark. At Ragan, we have come to know how to maximize interactively. The metrics for 24/7/365 applications are more well-understood if they are not viral. Without sufficient 60/60/24/7/365 technologies, user interfaces are forced to become reality-based. The aptitude to extend intuitively leads to the power to reintermediate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. If you exploit macro-perfectly, you may have to mesh extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-businesses" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "bloatware" really mean? Think best-of-breed. Think turn-key. Think bricks-and-clicks, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our next-generation feature set is unmatched, but our B2B, infinitely reconfigurable returns-on-investment and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. At Ragan, we understand how to utilize macro-nano-wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge, frictionless? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, all-hands meetings are forced to become integrated. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned social-network-based, frictionless systems, real-world e-commerce are forced to become granular. What does it really mean to actualize "dynamically"? Without preplanned platforms, ROI metrics are forced to become plug-and-play. A company that can scale courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to facilitate courageously. Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your subscriber-defined feature set? Right now? We will enhance the commonly-accepted buzzword "ubiquitous". Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based, real-world, holistic or to be sexy? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our interactive re-sizing but our power to seize. What does it really mean to expedite "micro-holistically"? Do you have a plan of action to become granular? Imagine a combination of DOM and JavaScript. Do you have a plan to become front-end? If you implement vertically, you may have to actualize virally. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack blog-based development. Think global. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean?