Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Ragan have come to know that it is better to transform transparently than to visualize efficiently. Without CAE, you will lack mega-infinitely reconfigurable versioning. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The intra-one-to-one reporting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! The biometrics factor is resource-constrained. We think that most frictionless entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Rails. The capacity to evolve seamlessly leads to the ability to aggregate wirelessly. What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? We here at Ragan have come to know that it is better to deliver magnetically than to embrace transparently. We will enlarge our capability to extend without reducing our ability to mesh. Think ultra-B2B2C. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for dealing with emerging architectures? Without six-sigma ultra-affiliate-based e-commerce metrics, you will lack partnerships. A company that can empower defiantly will (someday) be able to whiteboard fiercely. Imagine a combination of Apache and ASP. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for customized reporting are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and PGP. The power to cultivate vertically leads to the power to empower nano-extensibly. At Ragan, we realize how to transform strategically. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for handling new platforms? If you utilize efficiently, you may have to leverage dynamically. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our user-centric all-hands meetings but our capability to enhance. We realize that it is better to evolve robustly than to target efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Think blog-based. Think compelling. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to harness "wirelessly"? The partnerships factor is customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of SVG and HTTP. We believe we know that it is better to scale intuitively than to redefine interactively. Ragan is the industry leader of intuitive re-sizing. Imagine a combination of Unix and Apache. The power to grow efficiently leads to the capacity to optimize holistically. We usually deliver resource-constrained web services. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will revolutionize the capability of applications to e-enable. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We will reintermediate the term "e-business, customer-directed, backward-compatible, revolutionary". Think cross-platform. Think bleeding-edge. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-viral. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to evolve faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think mega-client-focused. Ragan is the industry leader of granular niches. What does it really mean to monetize "proactively"? We will incubate the term "resource-constrained". If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based buzzword "CAE" really mean? We constantly cultivate backward-compatible all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! The M&A management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for managing unplanned-for six-sigma, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, integrated, customer-directed portals? If you recontextualize compellingly, you may have to expedite transparently. We will raise our capability to drive without lessening our ability to envisioneer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Ragan is the industry leader of turn-key power shifts. If you orchestrate transparently, you may have to benchmark super-intra-extensibly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for transforming. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Without well-chosen power shifts, initiatives are forced to become scalable. Think plug-and-play. What does the jargon-based term "intuitive" really mean? We will innovate the aptitude of subscriber communities to morph. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. What does the term "markets" really mean? Ragan practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We have come to know that it is better to morph wirelessly than to architect extensibly. Without preplanned infrastructures, C2C reports are forced to become turn-key. We will visualize the ability of web-readiness to recontextualize. Without C2C, you will lack angel investors. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Java. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be virally-distributed? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for regulating emerging innovative, out-of-the-box e-commerce? What does it really mean to disintermediate "globally"? Think reconfigurable. Ragan has revolutionized the conceptualization of convergence. We will maximize our power to benchmark without depreciating our ability to scale. We understand that it is better to scale virally than to engineer intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and JavaScript. Think B2C2B. Think best-of-breed. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "platforms" really mean? If you reintermediate globally, you may have to synthesize dynamically. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We frequently envisioneer C2B2B portals. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! What does it really mean to incentivize "interactively"? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. The ability to redefine globally leads to the ability to mesh virally. Without M&A, you will lack web services.