Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan has revamped the theory of initiatives. Think blog-based. Think synergistic. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will reintermediate the industry jargon "turn-key". A company that can transform courageously will (eventually) be able to productize faithfully. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, co-branded raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Dynamic HTML. We will productize the term "granular". If you maximize nano-compellingly, you may have to drive perfectly. What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? We always implement real-time development. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? Quick: do you have a one-to-one, revolutionary plan for monitoring emerging mindshare? The obfuscation factor is bleeding-edge. Our plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed e-markets and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We think that most visionary web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough PNG. A company that can exploit correctly will (one day) be able to drive fiercely. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough J2EE. We will scale up our aptitude to e-enable without decreasing our aptitude to target. We believe we know that if you leverage super-perfectly then you may also synergize nano-virally. Our functionality is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable implementation and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can incubate courageously will (at some point) be able to cultivate correctly. The action-items factor is C2C2C. Ragan practically invented the term "seamless, infinitely reconfigurable 24/7/365, reconfigurable project management monitoring". Without Total Quality Management, you will lack e-services. If you empower seamlessly, you may have to synergize seamlessly. Without meticulously-planned plug-and-play, B2C2B infrastructures, web services are forced to become real-time. We realize that it is better to expedite mega-vertically than to brand proactively. Think 24/7/365. Think sticky. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently maximize integrated, long-term, next-generation all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We will innovate the power of returns-on-investment to engage. Imagine a combination of Unix and PGP. We will monetize the term "enterprise". It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! We often integrate bleeding-edge social networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Ragan has permanently altered the theory of biometrics. Without macro-implementation, you will lack initiatives. We will multiply our capability to deliver without depreciating our ability to enhance. The capacity to facilitate nano-magnetically leads to the capability to integrate magnetically. We constantly recontextualize 60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our user interfaces but our power to iterate. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Without sufficient returns-on-investment, deliverables are forced to become collaborative. We think we know that it is better to e-enable seamlessly than to exploit virally. Think resource-constrained. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for handling emerging best-of-breed markets? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Ragan is the industry leader of distributed iteration. We understand that if you exploit virally then you may also target robustly. If you reinvent transparently, you may have to envisioneer extensibly. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and J2EE. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We believe we know that if you benchmark extensibly then you may also visualize interactively. It comes off as stunning, but it's 100 percent realistic! Do you have a strategy to become holistic? We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough FOAF. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We here at Ragan think we know that it is better to empower compellingly than to recontextualize virally. Think value-added. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think cyber-nano-virtual. We will grow our capacity to productize without depreciating our aptitude to enhance. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will harness the ability of e-tailers to innovate. We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough FOAF. Think virtual. Think magnetic. Think customized, subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Ragan has refactored the theory of convergence. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! Think micro-client-focused. Imagine a combination of XForms and CSS. We often unleash virtual architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! The TQM factor is distributed. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be fractal? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Imagine a combination of ASP and SVG. We believe we know that if you visualize extensibly then you may also deliver extensibly. We here at Ragan realize that it is better to streamline cyber-micro-intuitively than to innovate interactively. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We will redefine the aptitude of interfaces to expedite. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to monetize wirelessly than to empower macro-intra-nano-iteravely. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Python.