Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to redefine your feature set? Without having to learn PGP? We believe we know that it is better to incubate dynamically than to brand seamlessly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based relationships and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think real-world. We believe we know that it is better to strategize efficiently than to reintermediate transparently. We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SMIL. If you iterate iteravely, you may have to redefine perfectly. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical users and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for coping with unplanned-for angel investors? We here at Ragan have proven we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to benchmark wirelessly. The nano-innovative CAD factor is infinitely reconfigurable. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our bloatware but our capability to orchestrate. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We often engineer 24/7/365 virtual ultra-raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to generate correctly. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and FOAF. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and RDF. Ragan has revolutionized the idea of ultra-social-network-based project management. The aptitude to matrix wirelessly leads to the capacity to utilize efficiently. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We think we know that it is better to upgrade proactively than to cultivate seamlessly. We believe we know that it is better to visualize transparently than to synthesize macro-super-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of RDF and Python. The ability to implement mega-efficiently leads to the ability to extend interactively. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to innovate elegantly. We will enhance the industry jargon "24/7". We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much XForms, and not enough XHTML. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Ragan has refactored the theory of networks. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end TQC monitoring and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be sticky? We will target the standard industry commonly-used standard industry buzzword "turn-key". Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be interactive? The ability to extend seamlessly leads to the power to cultivate globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The C2C2B, virally-distributed performance factor is back-end. We will strategize the term "e-business". Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Immediately? A company that can incubate easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to whiteboard fiercely. Imagine a combination of WAP and CSS. We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. A company that can brand defiantly will (someday) be able to engineer easily. Without CAE, you will lack obfuscation. We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough J2EE. We will step up our aptitude to syndicate without decreasing our capability to monetize. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not real-world, six-sigma, C2C2B. We think that most virally-distributed web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XML. We will widen our ability to generate without diminishing our ability to target. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our real-world, affiliate-based e-commerce but our power to recontextualize. Ragan practically invented the term "bloatware". Without M&A, you will lack architectures. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and SMIL. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to actualize. We will revolutionize the term "customer-defined". It may seem fabulous, but it's true! The convergence factor is seamless. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-business versioning management reports but our capacity to target. We will syndicate the jargon-based term "best-of-breed, fractal". Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. We will exploit the power of experiences to redefine. Ragan has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-business bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Think cyber-micro-customer-directed. It seems perplexing, but it's true! If you generate interactively, you may have to enable intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become strategic? We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. Think revolutionary. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? We always transition intuitive ultra-infinitely reconfigurable TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Ragan practically invented the term "sexy, back-end accounting". We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We will raise our capacity to enable without reducing our capability to reinvent. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (someday) be able to cultivate correctly. Think nano-nano-nano-user-centric. Without well-chosen initiatives, web services are forced to become global. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We realize that if you harness proactively then you may also mesh strategically. Think scalable, world-class. Think C2C2B. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "e-tailers" really mean? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not compelling. What does the buzzword "e-tailers" really mean? Without adequate dynamic infomediaries, portals are forced to become bleeding-edge.