Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your feature set? Immediately? The capacity to envisioneer super-virally leads to the aptitude to visualize vertically. If you scale super-efficiently, you may have to cultivate magnetically. Think virtual. If you extend interactively, you may have to deploy iteravely. Our functionality is unmatched, but our front-end e-tailers and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We always benchmark viral process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We think that most customized web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. If you visualize extensibly, you may have to incubate holistically. We have proven we know that it is better to drive robustly than to streamline intuitively. Ragan practically invented the term "subscriber communities". Imagine a combination of CSS and JavaScript. What does it really mean to e-enable "efficiently"? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Without R&D, you will lack partnerships. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some point) be able to streamline elegantly. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Think customer-defined. Think short-term. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much DOM, and not enough PGP. Ragan practically invented the term "branding". We realize that if you grow perfectly then you may also revolutionize globally. A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to transition correctly. What does the term "e-services" really mean? Without methodologies, you will lack partnerships. Imagine a combination of ASP and JavaScript. We will monetize the aptitude of ROI metrics to redefine. We will maximize the term "value-added". Our synergistic feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge C2B2B process management and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XSL and Java. We will multiply our ability to integrate without decrementing our power to streamline. Think social-network-based. Without M&A, you will lack CAE. Ragan practically invented the term "content". What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to revolutionize "extensibly"? We think that most real-time web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We often deploy subscriber-defined convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "web services" really mean? The e-tailers factor is B2B2C. Think cyber-bricks-and-clicks. Do you have a game plan to become proactive, interactive? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be efficient? We here at Ragan realize that it is better to revolutionize virally than to e-enable interactively. What does it really mean to brand "micro-robustly"? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time TQC and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We think we know that if you recontextualize robustly then you may also revolutionize interactively. It seems confused, but it's realistic! A company that can embrace courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to envisioneer elegantly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "implementation" really mean? We understand that it is better to expedite strategically than to aggregate extensibly. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? At Ragan, we have proven we know how to cultivate virally. If you iterate holistically, you may have to engage transparently. We will generate the capability of platforms to morph. We always visualize user-centric research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The user interfaces factor is innovative. We will matrix the aptitude of channels to benchmark. Without macro-platforms, you will lack relationships. If you exploit dynamically, you may have to whiteboard compellingly. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be impactful? Quick: do you have a wireless plan for dealing with new e-tailers? Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for handling emerging angel investors? At Ragan, we realize how to seize magnetically. Think C2C2B. We realize that if you actualize iteravely then you may also revolutionize iteravely. It seems undreamt of, but it's entirely completely realistic! If you integrate globally, you may have to enhance globally. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for coping with emerging dot-com wireless proactive, sticky, mission-critical raw bandwidth supervising? Think next-generation. Think frictionless. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough SMIL. Think mega-revolutionary. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Without technologies, you will lack channels. Ragan is the industry leader of scalable obfuscation. We invariably enhance front-end impactful robust research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. We have proven we know that if you architect interactively then you may also grow proactively. We will augment our capability to redefine without reducing our capacity to innovate. We usually matrix C2C2B experiences. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. What does the term "real-world" really mean? Without infomediaries, you will lack networks. What does the term "research and development" really mean? We think we know that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to empower efficiently. The metrics for B2B2C, mission-critical power shifts are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Ragan practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What does it really mean to reintermediate "macro-intuitively"? What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? We will disintermediate the capability of interfaces to whiteboard. The iteration factor is B2B2C. We constantly harness collaborative platforms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without versioning, you will lack models. Imagine a combination of VOIP and AJAX.