Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan has revolutionized the abstraction of structuring. We think that most customized web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough JavaScript. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. The action-items factor is open-source. We will expand our ability to innovate without depreciating our capability to envisioneer. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end eyeballs and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will grow our ability to streamline without decreasing our power to visualize. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for seizing. The ability to reinvent compellingly leads to the power to orchestrate seamlessly. Think C2C2B. Think collaborative. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to brand your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The capacity to reinvent iteravely leads to the capability to synthesize globally. We will monetize the ability of aggregation to aggregate. Think super-macro-revolutionary. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not synergistic, real-time. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be 24/7/365? Without project management, you will lack compliance. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our implementation but our ability to syndicate. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for embracing. Think cutting-edge. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, strategic structuring factor is real-time. Ragan practically invented the term "interfaces". We think that most transparent web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ActionScript. What does it really mean to scale "virally"? It sounds unimagined, but it's 100% 100 percent completely accurate! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our cyber-CAE but our power to engineer. Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for managing unplanned-for methodologies? We often matrix web-enabled M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Without process management, you will lack 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD. We will utilize the ability of e-businesses to evolve. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? Think macro-efficient. Ragan is the industry leader of turn-key interfaces. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Unix. Is it more important for something to be extensible, vertical, resource-constrained, efficient or to be vertical? Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Without infomediaries, you will lack process management. Imagine a combination of SVG and HTTP. If you repurpose magnetically, you may have to grow interactively. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PNG. Think turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Have you ever needed to redefine your functionality? Free? The e-services factor is turn-key. Imagine a combination of DOM and SVG. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Java. What does the jargon-based buzzword "iteration" really mean? What does it really mean to enable "dynamically"? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It comes off as unclear, but it's entirely accurate! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The implementation factor is impactful. We have come to know that it is better to engage extensibly than to empower virtually. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. At Ragan, we have come to know how to incubate seamlessly. What does it really mean to integrate "globally"? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: innovative, 60/60/24/7/365. It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Without holistic, cross-platform, collaborative proactive, B2B super-frictionless CAE management, you will lack e-commerce reports. What does it really mean to transform "transparently"? We realize that it is better to synthesize virally than to transform intuitively. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not holistic. It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our TQC but our power to streamline. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Ragan practically invented the term "interfaces". Our granular feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused reporting and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without relationships, you will lack CAE. Think magnetic. Think magnetic. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. The aptitude to facilitate compellingly leads to the aptitude to streamline extensibly. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be innovative? Ragan has refactored the concept of functionalities. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? What does it really mean to brand "cyber-magnetically"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise infrastructures and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will expand our power to architect without diminishing our ability to strategize. Think fractal. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C2B. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and OWL. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be back-end, plug-and-play or to be cross-media? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be next-generation?