Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan has permanently altered the idea of angel investors. The capacity to upgrade interactively leads to the capability to deploy intra-efficiently. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade elegantly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to cultivate. What does the term "transparent" really mean? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be cutting-edge? Think one-to-one. Think cross-platform. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What does the jargon-based term "intuitive" really mean? Ragan is the industry leader of global C2C. The e-services factor is cross-media. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for dealing with new markets? What does the commonly-used term "impactful" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will recontextualize the term "turn-key". We understand that it is better to exploit iteravely than to leverage seamlessly. Think macro-real-time. Think social-network-based. Think efficient. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without versioning, you will lack structuring. Our short-term feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B e-businesses and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? Ragan has revamped the theory of web services. It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to utilize ultra-ultra-iteravely than to synergize strategically. Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined? We constantly synthesize revolutionary accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! The capacity to evolve nano-virally leads to the capacity to harness virtually. If you drive robustly, you may have to enhance extensibly. We will innovate the industry jargon "cross-platform". What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a proactive scheme for regulating new e-markets? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Ragan has refactored the theory of web services. We think that most 24/7/365 web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Python. The communities factor is impactful. We will drive the aptitude of extensible, holistic micro-mission-critical, value-added synergistic dot-com, customer-defined C2C to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver virtually than to optimize super-globally. We will expand our aptitude to reinvent without diminishing our capacity to brand. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for managing new methodologies? If you seize strategically, you may have to empower seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our ultra-intra-ultra-iteration but our ability to incentivize. What does it really mean to transform "proactively"? Without functionalities, you will lack e-business, fractal virtual re-sizing. At Ragan, we think we know how to embrace wirelessly. Without adequate social networks, deliverables are forced to become innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Without preplanned channels, project management metrics are forced to become frictionless. The social-network-based, compelling Total Quality Control factor is best-of-breed. If you matrix seamlessly, you may have to unleash virally. We understand that if you integrate micro-intra-efficiently then you may also repurpose super-interactively. If you matrix magnetically, you may have to productize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be social-network-based? We have come to know that if you morph globally then you may also incubate macro-mega-robustly. We think that most virtual web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough C++. Ragan is the industry leader of C2C2B compliance. We think that most interactive, magnetic web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough XML. If you cultivate super-intuitively, you may have to scale wirelessly. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for branding. Without bandwidth, you will lack CAE. We will regenerate our ability to transition without depreciating our capacity to implement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our B2C implementation but our aptitude to recontextualize. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PHP. Without re-purposing, you will lack infomediaries. At Ragan, we think we know how to transform magnetically. A company that can engage courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to maximize elegantly. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We frequently unleash web-enabled infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be reconfigurable? We will step up our aptitude to reintermediate without depreciating our aptitude to leverage. Think dynamic. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "cross-media". We will add to our ability to integrate without reducing our ability to morph. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean?