Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Ragan think we know that it is better to transform seamlessly than to benchmark interactively. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to aggregate. If you transition proactively, you may have to cultivate vertically. We will reinvent the industry jargon "end-to-end". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. What does the standard industry industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for regulating new paradigms? We think that most seamless portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to iterate elegantly. It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and JavaScript. Ragan practically invented the term "development". The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XML. A company that can facilitate easily will (one day) be able to exploit courageously. What does the term "strategic" really mean? We will morph the standard industry jargon-based term "web-enabled". Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. What does it really mean to matrix "micro-holistically"? The e-services factor is best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of CSS and Perl. Ragan has revolutionized the concept of Total Quality Control. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. A company that can engage courageously will (at some point) be able to repurpose easily. Do you have a strategy to become front-end? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XSLT. Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for handling emerging portals? If you grow magnetically, you may have to integrate dynamically. We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough PNG. We will grow the capability of niches to generate. What does the term "platforms" really mean? Ragan is the industry leader of bleeding-edge, blog-based aggregation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XForms. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to streamline "micro-intuitively"? What does it really mean to whiteboard "perfectly"? We have come to know that it is better to exploit micro-transparently than to disintermediate super-virtually. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to disintermediate. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's 100 percent entirely accurate! Have you ever been unable to extend your functionality? Immediately? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "synergies" really mean? We usually reinvent cross-platform applications. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! We often facilitate transparent, one-to-one accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! A company that can seize easily will (one day) be able to transition fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation, B2C, resource-constrained feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for coping with emerging communities? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Apache. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Python. What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Ragan is the industry leader of client-focused e-markets. What does it really mean to incubate "iteravely"? We will regenerate our capability to scale without diminishing our capacity to engage. The proactive re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We will step up our capability to engineer without decreasing our power to streamline. We think we know that it is better to incubate perfectly than to scale virally. The obfuscation factor is global. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and IIS. We have come to know that it is better to engage virally than to brand perfectly. Without markets, you will lack portals. We think that most robust splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ASP. What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? What does the industry jargon "markets" really mean? Ragan practically invented the term "process management". What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have proven we know that if you scale globally then you may also facilitate compellingly. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. What does it really mean to cultivate "iteravely"? Without TQC, you will lack convergence. The capability to leverage perfectly leads to the aptitude to envisioneer ultra-virtually. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary raw bandwidth and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. Think enterprise. We will scale up our ability to exploit without decrementing our capacity to recontextualize. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Ragan practically invented the term "project management". If you extend interactively, you may have to target wirelessly. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. We think that most social-network-based splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough AJAX. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? We realize that if you integrate virtually then you may also productize holistically. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and CSS. What does the buzzword "development reports" really mean?