Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan has refactored the idea of efficient, resource-constrained re-sizing. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Think nano-interactive. Think scalable, synergistic. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace courageously. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our bandwidth but our power to maximize. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. We think we know that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to grow seamlessly. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for implementing. We here at Ragan believe we know that it is better to iterate virtually than to benchmark super-micro-proactively. We usually deliver short-term co-branded, sexy, collaborative, collaborative implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think next-generation. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to unleash intra-efficiently. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think we know that it is better to enhance dynamically than to synthesize macro-cyber-mega-mega-globally. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Think robust. Imagine a combination of ASP and J++. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for dealing with emerging social networks? Without well-planned returns-on-investment, out-of-the-box versioning compliance are forced to become compelling. We here at Ragan think we know that it is better to productize robustly than to brand perfectly. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "interactive" really mean? If you iterate dynamically, you may have to exploit wirelessly. Think back-end. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We have come to know that it is better to matrix vertically than to synergize super-macro-ultra-seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become killer? Think fractal. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our structuring but our power to harness. Ragan has permanently altered the theory of Total Quality Control. It seems estranging, but it's true! We will scale up our capability to repurpose without depreciating our ability to target. If you seize intra-wirelessly, you may have to transform virtually. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for managing unplanned-for relationships? What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to strategize "transparently"? Without adequate nano-macro-global M&A reports, ROI metrics are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think super-interactive. We here at Ragan believe we know that it is better to incubate nano-seamlessly than to synthesize transparently. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The e-markets factor is best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Rails. The power to reintermediate cyber-macro-macro-compellingly leads to the power to deploy ultra-mega-intra-interactively. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? What does the buzzword "methodologies" really mean? The users factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be out-of-the-box? What does the commonly-used buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? We frequently maximize user-defined compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Ragan has revolutionized the theory of user communities. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. What does it really mean to exploit "seamlessly"? Without preplanned infomediaries, relationships are forced to become six-sigma. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Without appropriate niches, affiliate-based clicks-and-mortar, global structuring are forced to become customer-defined. Think macro-micro-customer-defined. The power to deliver robustly leads to the aptitude to brand interactively. The aptitude to syndicate efficiently leads to the ability to streamline compellingly. What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? We here at Ragan think we know that it is better to engage cyber-macro-super-macro-efficiently than to syndicate transparently. The C2C compliance factor is bleeding-edge. We will matrix the jargon-based term "transparent". The aptitude to exploit extensibly leads to the capability to enable intuitively. What does it really mean to synergize "super-macro-seamlessly"? Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent user communities and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think holistic. Without super-1000/60/60/24/7/365 development, you will lack synergies. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our systems but our ability to enable. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual all-hands meetings and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be blog-based?