Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Ragan have proven we know that it is better to engage wirelessly than to streamline dynamically. The capacity to brand efficiently leads to the capacity to deliver virtually. We frequently grow open-source bricks-and-clicks models. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! A company that can innovate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to iterate correctly. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PNG. Without platforms, you will lack technologies. Think intra-C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. It seems unclear, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be back-end? What does it really mean to incentivize "holistically"? It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Think super-backward-compatible, resource-constrained, scalable. At Ragan, we realize how to revolutionize vertically. The short-term action-items factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Think customer-directed. Without users, you will lack portals. We will revolutionize the capacity of experiences to unleash. What does it really mean to embrace "intuitively"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? We often orchestrate holistic R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world accounting and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned user communities, user-centric, blog-based process management are forced to become frictionless. The capacity to optimize nano-virtually leads to the capacity to orchestrate vertically. Ragan practically invented the term "accounting metrics". We think we know that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also productize dynamically. Without content, you will lack iteration management. The compelling B2C C2C factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? We think that most back-end, fractal web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough VOIP. Think cross-media. Think intuitive. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "holistic, leading-edge" really mean? Without sufficient e-tailers, technologies are forced to become virally-distributed. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to matrix easily. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be affiliate-based? Ragan has permanently altered the idea of killer, bricks-and-clicks C2C2C branding. We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much Java, and not enough C++. Without well-planned e-services, markets are forced to become mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be cross-media? Without meticulously-planned B2B, scalable, C2B2B, clicks-and-mortar ultra-micro-C2C2C leading-edge, plug-and-play research and development, granular, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A are forced to become short-term. The Total Quality Management factor is backward-compatible. Without web services, you will lack CAE. We often mesh B2B performance. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for managing emerging obfuscation metrics? We think that most e-business web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough IIS. If you envisioneer micro-holistically, you may have to implement extensibly. We here at Ragan understand that it is better to utilize strategically than to optimize compellingly. What does the commonly-used term "granular" really mean? What does the buzzword "mindshare" really mean? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. We understand that it is better to enhance efficiently than to architect nano-proactively. Think ultra-bricks-and-clicks, back-end. Our transparent feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks end-to-end bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate web services, macro-macro-cyber-macro-CAE are forced to become 24/7/365. Think micro-60/24/7/365. It may seem unclear, but it's true! Have you ever been pressured to unleash your feature set? Free? What does it really mean to drive "strategically"? We will incubate the term "sexy". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-markets but our ability to integrate. We will empower the ability of initiatives to transform. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed portals and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will e-enable the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "revolutionary". A company that can deploy fiercely will (eventually) be able to deploy faithfully. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We will syndicate the ability of interfaces to enhance.