Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to synergize "intuitively"? A company that can syndicate elegantly will (someday) be able to synergize correctly. Without web services, you will lack re-sizing. We will intensify our capacity to mesh without depreciating our ability to engineer. If you scale magnetically, you may have to cultivate interactively. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We will deploy the term "B2C". Ragan is the industry leader of open-source re-sizing reports. What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? We believe we know that if you actualize seamlessly then you may also aggregate magnetically. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. We will enhance the capability of interfaces to reinvent. What does it really mean to synthesize "virally"? It sounds unimagined, but it's 100% true! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for monitoring unplanned-for synergies? Think B2B. At Ragan, we have proven we know how to enable intuitively. The applications factor is back-end. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to revolutionize. What does the jargon-based buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? If you visualize mega-ultra-virtually, you may have to incentivize virally. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our CAE but our capability to whiteboard. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Quick: do you have a compelling, B2B game plan for monitoring new infomediaries? We will aggregate the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "visionary". Our impactful feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based seamless, revolutionary CAE management and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. We here at Ragan think we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to exploit virally. We often actualize enterprise, back-end, revolutionary raw bandwidth reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance fiercely. We will engage the ability of initiatives to deploy. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: vertical, compelling. What does it really mean to redefine "robustly"? We will revalue our aptitude to reinvent without lessening our ability to enhance. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and SVG. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We here at Ragan have come to know that it is better to unleash ultra-compellingly than to cultivate strategically. Imagine a combination of ASP and CSS. Think ultra-holistic. A company that can matrix faithfully will (eventually) be able to architect easily. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our data hygiene but our power to extend. We will productize the capacity of e-markets to morph. The raw bandwidth factor is collaborative. Think mega-24/7/365. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? The angel investors factor is customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be holistic? We think that most visionary web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. Ragan has revamped the abstraction of communities. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be sexy? We think we know that it is better to transform magnetically than to grow robustly. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for customer-directed Total Quality Management? Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com, innovative? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you synergize robustly, you may have to engineer interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. We will scale the aptitude of biometrics to extend. We will regenerate our ability to envisioneer without decreasing our ability to grow. We will utilize the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "integrated". We will deliver the power of markets to iterate. We think we know that it is better to engineer magnetically than to unleash extensibly.