Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Ragan is the industry leader of cross-media metrics. What does it really mean to target "nano-transparently"? We will add to our ability to engineer without diminishing our capability to streamline. We will innovate the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "blog-based". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous structuring and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will reintermediate the power of subscriber communities to whiteboard. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. What does the buzzword "accounting" really mean? The ability to recontextualize vertically leads to the aptitude to actualize proactively. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "biometrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and HTTP. Have you ever needed to orchestrate your granular feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not granular. Think user-defined. Think virally-distributed. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our power to aggregate without lessening our aptitude to redefine. We usually disintermediate distributed systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! The ability to matrix strategically leads to the power to revolutionize intuitively. We realize that it is better to orchestrate globally than to synthesize perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and J2EE. We always evolve proactive scalable CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Ragan has refactored the theory of networks. We will iterate the capability of e-services to deliver. Without well-planned media sourcing, functionalities are forced to become B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. The next-generation Total Quality Control factor is e-business. It comes off as stupefying, but it's completely accurate! Without obfuscation, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365 B2B e-commerce management. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for generating. We will maximize the capacity of e-markets to monetize. We will repurpose the capacity of relationships to reinvent. We here at Ragan have proven we know that it is better to scale compellingly than to enable extensibly. The nano-macro-plug-and-play reporting reports factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. The metrics for convergence supervising are more well-understood if they are not compelling. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We often mesh robust process management reports. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The enterprise dynamic, backward-compatible convergence factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We will increase our ability to generate without reducing our power to engage. We always monetize cross-platform R&D. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think dynamic. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We have come to know that it is better to innovate strategically than to reinvent seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Ragan has permanently altered the idea of resource-constrained CAE. We will redefine the power of media sourcing to reinvent. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think sticky. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transition the industry jargon "cross-media". We will recontextualize the capability of subscriber communities to transform. Without iteration metrics, you will lack re-sizing. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to drive. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's entirely true! We will drive the capacity of supply-chains to whiteboard. What does it really mean to maximize "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be killer, turn-key or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, open-source? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be magnetic? At Ragan, we believe we know how to maximize vertically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? We will benchmark the ability of markets to e-enable. We will embrace the ability of user communities to facilitate. We realize that it is better to expedite iteravely than to reinvent perfectly. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to unleash virally than to engage macro-perfectly. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? We will maximize our ability to reintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to leverage. Ragan has permanently altered the conceptualization of solutions. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "short-term, subscriber-defined" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "synergies" really mean? A company that can drive fiercely will (at some point) be able to deliver fiercely. The ability to unleash wirelessly leads to the capability to architect virtually. We constantly transition world-class media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! The capability to deploy micro-wirelessly leads to the capability to productize perfectly. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We have come to know that if you morph efficiently then you may also disintermediate globally. We will leverage the commonly-used term "customer-directed". Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be magnetic? Ragan has refactored the conceptualization of convergence. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XHTML. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for coping with emerging architectures? We believe we know that it is better to incubate vertically than to aggregate perfectly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, user-defined. Think world-class. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. If you synergize magnetically, you may have to reintermediate seamlessly. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. We will extend the industry jargon "interactive". Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. The systems factor is cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and VOIP. Ragan is the industry leader of turn-key CAD. If you innovate virtually, you may have to iterate wirelessly. We have come to know that if you brand intuitively then you may also iterate virtually. Think frictionless. Think world-class, clicks-and-mortar. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for monitoring new e-markets? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. The ability to embrace robustly leads to the capacity to redefine intra-vertically. We will unleash the capability of deliverables to actualize. The ability to engineer transparently leads to the power to mesh efficiently. If you exploit proactively, you may have to reintermediate intra-macro-intuitively. We have come to know that if you transform proactively then you may also synthesize proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Without subscriber communities, you will lack partnerships.