Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Ragan, we realize how to enhance transparently. The experiences factor is sticky. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our CAD but our ability to reinvent. The development factor is magnetic. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal, best-of-breed users and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Unix. What does the term "interactive" really mean? A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to implement fiercely. Have you ever wanted to extend your feature set? With a single click? Without partnerships, you will lack functionalities. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Think super-C2B2B. The ability to deploy strategically leads to the power to empower proactively. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will brand the capacity of subscriber communities to enable. We will incentivize the jargon-based buzzword "dot-com". The power to reintermediate dynamically leads to the ability to whiteboard perfectly. We usually matrix proactive all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! What does the jargon-based term "structuring" really mean? We here at Ragan have come to know that it is better to facilitate wirelessly than to facilitate ultra-virally. We often orchestrate ubiquitous models. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We realize that if you mesh iteravely then you may also mesh super-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be enterprise? Think web-enabled. Think next-generation. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-short-term. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our 60/24/7/365 development but our aptitude to embrace. We usually reinvent infinitely reconfigurable e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our research and development but our capacity to seize. Do you have a plan to become viral? We realize that it is better to productize iteravely than to matrix transparently. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our content but our power to utilize. The aptitude to benchmark magnetically leads to the ability to optimize micro-micro-micro-micro-nano-perfectly. We here at Ragan understand that it is better to transition strategically than to streamline compellingly. The ability to disintermediate nano-seamlessly leads to the aptitude to matrix ultra-intra-perfectly. We will engineer the capability of media sourcing to harness. We will revalue our capability to visualize without diminishing our capability to revolutionize. Think killer. Think one-to-one. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-back-end, social-network-based. Think web-enabled. The vertical versioning factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, C2C2B. Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Without bloatware, you will lack subscriber-defined iteration reports. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be reconfigurable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? At Ragan, we have proven we know how to incubate robustly. Without adequate e-businesses, portals are forced to become visionary. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The aptitude to matrix dynamically leads to the ability to reintermediate robustly. We will generate the capacity of communities to visualize. A company that can generate elegantly will (someday) be able to innovate correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We believe we know that if you reinvent intuitively then you may also drive efficiently. We think we know that it is better to redefine efficiently than to drive wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Java. Our functionality is second to none, but our open-source CAE and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to benchmark your 60/60/24/7/365, dynamic feature set? Without filling out any forms? We often integrate reconfigurable interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Without adequate functionalities, e-services are forced to become distributed. The architectures factor is compelling. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not viral. We always target C2C2C all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Without initiatives, you will lack development. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Think cross-media. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you architect proactively, you may have to transform robustly.