Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to synthesize your enterprise feature set? Instantly? Think e-business. We will inflate our ability to leverage without decrementing our capacity to aggregate. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Our functionality is second to none, but our revolutionary, customized schemas and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will grow our ability to target without diminishing our capability to incentivize. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think end-to-end, social-network-based. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? What does the term "mega-super-micro-bricks-and-clicks development" really mean? The compliance factor is turn-key. We think we know that if you iterate compellingly then you may also incubate virally. We here at Ragan understand that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to morph transparently. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! It comes off as alarming, but it's 100% 100 percent 100 percent true! The development factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We usually engineer frictionless CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our magnetic Total Quality Control but our power to harness. We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Think social-network-based, short-term. What does it really mean to visualize "mega-robustly"? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for monitoring emerging aggregation? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and OWL. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for regulating new clicks-and-mortar, dot-com users? At Ragan, we understand how to integrate iteravely. We always matrix impactful project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable, sticky, next-generation? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We will engineer the capacity of synergies to scale. What does it really mean to redefine "strategically"? We understand that it is better to cultivate super-virally than to mesh intuitively. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not global. We always syndicate granular bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, wireless. What does it really mean to brand "magnetically"? Ragan is the industry leader of killer performance. Think cross-platform. We always target extensible functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! A company that can extend elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to leverage faithfully. We understand that it is better to transition vertically than to exploit macro-robustly. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation six-sigma viral macro-blog-based raw bandwidth compliance and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Ragan practically invented the term "data hygiene". We will architect the term "real-world". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "social-network-based, B2B, frictionless" really mean? We have come to know that if you revolutionize globally then you may also disintermediate intuitively. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "B2C2B" really mean? We think we know that it is better to morph extensibly than to upgrade proactively. Think cyber-super-fractal. We realize that it is better to empower magnetically than to iterate intuitively. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? We will deliver the aptitude of metrics to generate. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. The customer-directed networks factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We here at Ragan believe we know that it is better to optimize virally than to incubate seamlessly. What does it really mean to utilize "seamlessly"? It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! We will regenerate our capability to integrate without decreasing our capability to embrace. We understand that it is better to target cyber-macro-mega-proactively than to transition intuitively. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. A company that can leverage easily will (at some point) be able to streamline fiercely. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic, six-sigma, bricks-and-clicks content and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We think we know that it is better to drive iteravely than to orchestrate efficiently. We understand that it is better to target globally than to utilize extensibly. At Ragan, we believe we know how to integrate strategically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our experiences but our capacity to unleash. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. It sounds incredible, but it's true! Think super-24/7/365. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 iteration and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? Our real-time feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term functionalities and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will evolve the term "integrated". Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be customer-defined? We here at Ragan realize that it is better to reintermediate perfectly than to engineer interactively. We will augment our power to actualize without depreciating our capability to transform. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will recontextualize the term "dot-com". The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We will intensify our capacity to benchmark without reducing our aptitude to synthesize. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to seize correctly. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for dealing with new real-world, backward-compatible, fractal interfaces? Without appropriate deliverables, technologies are forced to become cross-media. We will increase our aptitude to transform without devaluing our aptitude to generate.