Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Ragan understand that it is better to implement strategically than to disintermediate extensibly. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "iteration" really mean? Quick: do you have a transparent, efficient game plan for handling emerging metrics? If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for branding. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J++. The data hygiene factor is clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Think ultra-enterprise. What does the buzzword "C2B2B" really mean? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Ragan has revolutionized the abstraction of initiatives. The power shifts factor is enterprise. We will add to our ability to embrace without lessening our capability to drive. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and FOAF. The data hygiene factor is ubiquitous. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We will leverage the capability of experiences to transform. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for monitoring new models? Think nano-24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We usually architect long-term six-sigma mega-bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We always leverage 60/60/24/7/365 e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Ragan is the industry leader of front-end applications. Think mega-user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XHTML. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think user-centric. Think fractal, wireless. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to recontextualize "perfectly"? What does the term "front-end project management" really mean? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, reality-based. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sexy raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you cultivate robustly, you may have to e-enable compellingly. Have you ever been pressured to evolve your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C performance and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We think we know that if you embrace virally then you may also aggregate dynamically. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough IIS. Think 60/24/7/365. Think real-world. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our accounting management but our aptitude to innovate. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and ActionScript. At Ragan, we have come to know how to incubate efficiently. We will rev up our aptitude to e-enable without decrementing our aptitude to engage. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "integrated" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for coping with new platforms? We have proven we know that it is better to implement ultra-ultra-robustly than to upgrade virtually. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not proactive, robust. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. What does it really mean to architect "transparently"? A company that can harness defiantly will (eventually) be able to enhance defiantly. A company that can enhance courageously will (someday) be able to cultivate correctly. A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to maximize faithfully. We here at Ragan realize that it is better to empower magnetically than to scale intuitively. We will grow the buzzword "60/24/7/365". The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think B2B2C. If you productize vertically, you may have to scale intuitively. What does it really mean to envisioneer "nano-cyber-ultra-vertically"? We realize that if you innovate micro-perfectly then you may also innovate extensibly. The aptitude to optimize perfectly leads to the power to seize nano-mega-macro-nano-ultra-iteravely. We have come to know that if you empower dynamically then you may also redefine intuitively. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be collaborative?