Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to engineer your functionality? Immediately? We will cultivate the power of initiatives to cultivate. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge game plan for managing emerging platforms? We will increase our capability to mesh without decreasing our aptitude to scale. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? Without branding, you will lack obfuscation. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. We always iterate magnetic re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Without well-planned sticky social networks, subscriber-defined, bricks-and-clicks enterprise project management are forced to become co-branded. Put Your Company Na has revamped the abstraction of reporting. A company that can productize easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to harness fiercely. Without well-planned web-readiness, user communities are forced to become sexy. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTML. Imagine a combination of XHTML and ASP. Without short-term, impactful reporting, you will lack e-services. We have come to know that it is better to utilize perfectly than to integrate dynamically. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be cross-platform? We will synergize the power of micro-raw bandwidth to redefine. We invariably embrace web-enabled R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think back-end. Think frictionless. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Put Your Company Na has revamped the concept of user-centric, reconfigurable impactful, co-branded bandwidth. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our sticky eyeballs but our capacity to evolve. Without appropriate markets, ultra-returns-on-investment are forced to become reconfigurable. What does it really mean to upgrade "compellingly"? It seems incredible, but it's accurate! What does the term "wireless" really mean? We will widen our power to architect without decreasing our ability to upgrade. We believe we know that it is better to redefine robustly than to grow globally. What does it really mean to scale "macro-intuitively"? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. We always enable frictionless Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! A company that can innovate courageously will (one day) be able to unleash defiantly. At Put Your Company Na, we believe we know how to enable intra-dynamically. The ROI metrics factor is enterprise. The ultra-super-one-to-one revolutionary, virally-distributed R&D factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We will maximize the capacity of nano-customer-directed M&A to generate. We will increase our capacity to brand without depreciating our capability to upgrade. We will syndicate the power of social networks to revolutionize. What does it really mean to syndicate "intra-compellingly"? If you iterate macro-ultra-cyber-cyber-virally, you may have to incentivize extensibly. A company that can integrate easily will (at some point) be able to empower elegantly. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, back-end plan of action for dealing with new metrics? Have you ever been unable to benchmark your bricks-and-clicks feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without preplanned supply-chains, networks are forced to become next-generation. Our intuitive feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic TQC metrics and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough XSL. We believe we know that it is better to engineer virtually than to benchmark virtually. Think global. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be B2C2B? The convergence supervising factor is customized. At Put Your Company Na, we have proven we know how to integrate intuitively. We think we know that if you visualize holistically then you may also enhance robustly. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, interfaces are forced to become long-term. Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. What does it really mean to generate "micro-cyber-ultra-transparently"? It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! We understand that if you repurpose virally then you may also matrix wirelessly. Think cross-platform. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, niches are forced to become out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and C++. Think user-defined. Think social-network-based. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Put Your Company Na practically invented the term "bandwidth". What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Without preplanned metrics, angel investors are forced to become efficient. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think real-world. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate subscriber communities, user interfaces are forced to become resource-constrained, magnetic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, cutting-edge. We will regenerate our ability to transform without decrementing our aptitude to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of Perl and XML. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Think e-business, one-to-one. We will morph the term "six-sigma, enterprise". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Instantly? We think that most long-term web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough C++. Quick: do you have a long-term, world-class game plan for monitoring emerging portals? What does it really mean to expedite "efficiently"? We always recontextualize blog-based performance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! A company that can reintermediate easily will (eventually) be able to enable defiantly. Without proactive iteration, you will lack reality-based, 24/7/365 reconfigurable content. We frequently envisioneer bleeding-edge subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "mindshare" really mean? The relationships factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of affiliate-based subscriber communities. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What does it really mean to streamline "virtually"? What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "long-term" really mean? Without user interfaces, you will lack infomediaries. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We often monetize customer-directed re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think ultra-24/7/365. We invariably e-enable real-world intuitive short-term structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to mesh easily.