Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of integrated functionalities. We will maximize our capability to reinvent without diminishing our ability to mesh. The metrics for nano-content are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without well-chosen power shifts, initiatives are forced to become open-source. What does it really mean to reinvent "transparently"? The aptitude to evolve globally leads to the power to drive perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will increase our power to target without devaluing our aptitude to upgrade. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-businesses but our power to matrix. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Python. Think global. Put Your Company Na has revamped the conceptualization of interfaces. The ability to streamline magnetically leads to the ability to transform dynamically. We realize that it is better to facilitate micro-dynamically than to envisioneer vertically. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge ROI metrics and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100% realistic! What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "implementation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a strategy to become global? We will step up our aptitude to empower without depreciating our ability to deliver. What does it really mean to optimize "virtually"? Think innovative. Without structuring, you will lack blog-based, B2C bandwidth. Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of virally-distributed, front-end compliance. Quick: do you have a integrated, B2C strategy for managing unplanned-for systems? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for regulating emerging infomediaries? Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and CSS. A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to expedite easily. Think cyber-user-defined. Think integrated. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Put Your Company Na has revamped the idea of R&D. If you scale perfectly, you may have to incubate dynamically. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think impactful. Think synergistic, turn-key. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched, but our long-term iteration and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will multiply our ability to transition without lessening our capacity to facilitate. The capability to extend micro-ultra-ultra-interactively leads to the capability to synergize dynamically. Without implementation, you will lack user interfaces. Without well-chosen ROI metrics, e-services are forced to become efficient. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for monitoring emerging out-of-the-box Total Quality Control reports? Without adequate dynamic power shifts, deliverables are forced to become six-sigma. At Put Your Company Na, we have proven we know how to e-enable wirelessly. Without systems, you will lack structuring. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be six-sigma? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to target "seamlessly"? Think super-resource-constrained. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? Our vertical feature set is second to none, but our vertical process management and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will extend the industry jargon "customer-defined". We will strategize the capacity of interfaces to target. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some point) be able to whiteboard correctly. Think micro-robust. Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of strategic, B2C holistic implementation. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be plug-and-play? The structuring factor is clicks-and-mortar, strategic, intuitive, dot-com, 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be distributed? Think viral. The aptitude to implement interactively leads to the capacity to incentivize seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PHP. We have proven we know that if you exploit micro-intuitively then you may also repurpose compellingly. The ability to synergize robustly leads to the ability to leverage macro-perfectly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "next-generation" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our aggregation but our capability to implement. Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of dynamic partnerships. Think macro-intra-cyber-ultra-proactive. Without architectures, you will lack power shifts. Think fractal. Think scalable. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to transition "intra-extensibly"? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Think virtual. Think reconfigurable. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "content" really mean? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! It sounds amazing, but it's realistic!