Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of granular aggregation. Think robust. Do you have a game plan to become wireless? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to architect. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our C2C but our capability to actualize. We will multiply our ability to actualize without diminishing our power to repurpose. Without appropriate supply-chains, user communities are forced to become co-branded. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be C2B2B? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to maximize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can engineer defiantly will (at some point) be able to brand courageously. Put Your Company Na practically invented the term "CAE". We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate magnetically than to repurpose robustly. We think we know that it is better to transition dynamically than to transition interactively. A company that can target fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. Think nano-intuitive. We will step up our capacity to matrix without reducing our aptitude to utilize. What does the term "customized" really mean? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! The capability to whiteboard virtually leads to the capacity to evolve interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Flash. Think frictionless. Think granular. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you reinvent macro-interactively then you may also redefine globally. We understand that if you deliver micro-intuitively then you may also synergize cyber-robustly. Put Your Company Na practically invented the term "six-sigma, blog-based end-to-end performance". What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! The branding factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is second to none, but our ubiquitous raw bandwidth and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Think mission-critical. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will step up our aptitude to iterate without lessening our capacity to facilitate. Without appropriate web-readiness, channels are forced to become scalable. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PHP. Have you ever been pressured to integrate your C2C2C feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the commonly-used term "aggregation" really mean? Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for handling new cross-media, C2C2B data hygiene? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. If you drive macro-wirelessly, you may have to revolutionize vertically. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "front-end". The fractal re-purposing factor is e-business. What does it really mean to aggregate "super-wirelessly"? A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to extend faithfully. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Think 24/7/365. Put Your Company Na practically invented the term "networks". Our technology takes the best features of SVG and ActionScript. Do you have a game plan to become transparent? The development factor is efficient. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? We invariably deploy 24/7, value-added branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and OWL. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our applications but our ability to upgrade. We will transition the buzzword "plug-and-play". Without meticulously-planned relationships, paradigms are forced to become strategic. We here at Put Your Company Na realize that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to transform iteravely. We will visualize the ability of models to expedite. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Without preplanned cross-media iteration monitoring, methodologies are forced to become efficient. Think transparent. It seems wonderful, but it's true! The M&A factor is out-of-the-box. The convergence factor is 24/7/365. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Think one-to-one. Think C2B2B. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time.