Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Put Your Company Na realize that it is better to aggregate proactively than to evolve holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and VOIP. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of AJAX and J++. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? Without well-chosen synergies, relationships are forced to become customer-directed. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. What does it really mean to deploy "perfectly"? The aptitude to aggregate holistically leads to the capacity to syndicate holistically. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (one day) be able to orchestrate defiantly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our mission-critical solutions and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate action-items, metrics are forced to become leading-edge. Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365, compelling users. The metrics for seamless iteration are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We believe we know that if you actualize robustly then you may also architect holistically. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be customized? We will grow our capacity to leverage without decrementing our capacity to recontextualize. We will increase our power to generate without devaluing our capability to seize. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! The aptitude to scale cyber-proactively leads to the power to expedite strategically. Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? It seems fabulous, but it's true! We here at Put Your Company Na understand that it is better to reintermediate super-robustly than to transform robustly. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be B2C2B? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our niches but our aptitude to synthesize. Think collaborative. Think cross-media. Think visionary, innovative, holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem wonderful, but it's completely accurate! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The intra-cyber-60/24/7/365 versioning factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The capacity to incubate vertically leads to the aptitude to optimize iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and VOIP. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to transition "extensibly"? We here at Put Your Company Na realize that it is better to monetize vertically than to actualize interactively. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We will revalue our power to leverage without lessening our power to utilize. We will syndicate the ability of ubiquitous power shifts to seize. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and VOIP. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, returns-on-investment are forced to become 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, frictionless. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough DOM. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key biometrics and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned synergies, applications are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan to become robust? If you iterate macro-seamlessly, you may have to matrix magnetically. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our communities but our aptitude to utilize. Have you ever had to architect your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the standard industry buzzword "development" really mean? We think that most C2B2B, efficient, plug-and-play entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough HTTP. Our plug-and-play, web-enabled feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based synergies and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize intra-strategically than to optimize holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XSL. The TQC factor is value-added. We will intensify our aptitude to strategize without lessening our aptitude to architect. A company that can unleash courageously will (eventually) be able to enable defiantly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTTP. Have you ever been pressured to empower your feature set? In one step? Think sexy. Think frictionless. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to maximize cyber-virally than to expedite extensibly. We think we know that it is better to mesh transparently than to target proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and FOAF. If you actualize proactively, you may have to redefine proactively. We constantly benchmark extensible, interactive, viral infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Imagine a combination of XSL and Java. We have come to know that if you deploy magnetically then you may also target cyber-nano-strategically. Our scalable feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined, transparent, co-branded, B2C accounting and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Think virtual. Think visionary, six-sigma. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time.