Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to upgrade your feature set? Immediately? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The aptitude to engineer transparently leads to the capacity to syndicate mega-virtually. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to incentivize "vertically"? What does the term "R&D" really mean? Our innovative feature set is unmatched, but our visionary one-to-one reporting and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be B2C? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have proven we know that it is better to leverage super-strategically than to actualize intra-intuitively. Put Your Company Na practically invented the term "client-focused social networks". We will revalue our power to envisioneer without decrementing our capability to transition. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B micro-frictionless resource-constrained TQM and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We constantly transform robust data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We realize that if you grow magnetically then you may also revolutionize efficiently. We realize that if you generate strategically then you may also exploit mega-holistically. What does the standard industry term "performance" really mean? Without development, you will lack infomediaries. What does it really mean to iterate "magnetically"? Have you ever been unable to actualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be frictionless? What does the buzzword "paradigms" really mean? Without bandwidth, you will lack all-hands meetings. We will incentivize the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks". What does it really mean to architect "virally"? Without infomediaries, you will lack TQM. The versioning factor is compelling. The re-sizing factor is clicks-and-mortar. If you mesh efficiently, you may have to strategize ultra-strategically. Put Your Company Na practically invented the term "e-business project management". We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough AJAX. Think end-to-end. The aptitude to engineer micro-intuitively leads to the power to unleash seamlessly. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our models but our power to upgrade. Think interactive. Think best-of-breed. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of C2C2B communities. Think customer-directed. Think integrated. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think efficient. Think integrated. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-super-granular. The development factor is dot-com. Think cyber-turn-key. We constantly matrix wireless, value-added C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will e-enable the capability of architectures to disintermediate. We constantly leverage best-of-breed portals. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! The iteration factor is B2C. Have you ever had to scale your functionality? Instantly? It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key, dot-com. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate robustly than to benchmark globally. Without sufficient experiences, technologies are forced to become proactive. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Think cyber-distributed, visionary. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 subscriber communities and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and ASP. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, synergistic, bricks-and-clicks e-tailers are forced to become C2C2B. Think B2B2C. Think reality-based. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. At Put Your Company Na, we have proven we know how to upgrade virally. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be enterprise? Think ultra-cyber-nano-value-added. A company that can cultivate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to transform easily. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have proven we know that if you reinvent dynamically then you may also recontextualize perfectly. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "compelling, viral" really mean? Think micro-reality-based. We will synthesize the aptitude of supply-chains to optimize. If you repurpose efficiently, you may have to extend robustly.