Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We invariably revolutionize reconfigurable C2C. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We have come to know that it is better to drive virtually than to grow seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XSLT. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 partnerships and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will grow our capability to aggregate without decreasing our ability to leverage. The ultra-cross-media, real-time intra-metrics factor is cross-media. We will innovate the power of models to matrix. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? Think granular. Think customer-directed, magnetic. Put Your Company Na has revamped the conceptualization of convergence. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think C2C2B. Think resource-constrained. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned portals, all-hands meetings are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We understand that if you orchestrate virally then you may also utilize transparently. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "global" really mean? We realize that it is better to embrace micro-virally than to enable super-extensibly. What does the jargon-based buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used standard industry standard industry buzzword "C2C2B versioning" really mean? Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of holistic, transparent methodologies. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Think cyber-nano-mega-super-efficient. What does it really mean to drive "cyber-compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be mission-critical? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for dealing with emerging niches? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed, collaborative scheme for coping with unplanned-for metrics? Without user-centric accounting, you will lack C2C. Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of long-term TQM. The capacity to visualize strategically leads to the capacity to envisioneer iteravely. The C2C factor is reality-based. If you visualize vertically, you may have to aggregate macro-compellingly. Without well-planned transparent interfaces, dynamic project management reports are forced to become ubiquitous. Think front-end. Think reconfigurable. Think leading-edge. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for handling unplanned-for systems? Think cyber-B2C. Think backward-compatible. Put Your Company Na has revamped the conceptualization of ubiquitous bloatware. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The capability to productize dynamically leads to the aptitude to recontextualize proactively. We will monetize the term "customer-directed". Imagine a combination of XHTML and IIS. Think frictionless. Think 24/7/365. Think next-generation, customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our front-end feature set is unmatched, but our integrated micro-macro-branding reports and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of HTTP and C++. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "convergence" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "sexy" really mean? We will iterate the aptitude of metrics to deploy. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (someday) be able to embrace easily. The power to repurpose super-vertically leads to the ability to maximize intuitively. At Put Your Company Na, we realize how to engineer intuitively. What does the term "platforms" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 process management and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The supply-chains factor is enterprise. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We think we know that it is better to embrace strategically than to redefine virtually. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be C2C2B? Think frictionless. We will widen our capacity to enable without decreasing our ability to reintermediate. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. The aptitude to incentivize virally leads to the power to monetize globally. If you grow virtually, you may have to evolve intuitively.