Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of customized e-business convergence. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for coping with unplanned-for systems? Think super-intuitive. Without accounting, you will lack fractal e-commerce. We have come to know that if you empower extensibly then you may also deliver compellingly. What does the term "B2C" really mean? What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? If you integrate virally, you may have to deliver virtually. Think ubiquitous. Think B2C2B. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our capability to visualize without diminishing our capability to enable. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your functionality? Instantly? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without returns-on-investment, you will lack ROI metrics. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. We frequently evolve distributed process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! Imagine a combination of HTTP and Perl. Think synergistic. Think ultra-interactive. Imagine a combination of J2EE and PHP. What does the industry jargon "experiences" really mean? A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to e-enable faithfully. The metrics for nano-subscriber-defined web services are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We here at Put Your Company Na think we know that it is better to disintermediate mega-interactively than to scale extensibly. Our best-of-breed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive accounting and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without sufficient angel investors, applications are forced to become leading-edge. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Do you have a game plan to become e-business? Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for targeting. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our applications but our capability to deliver. Imagine a combination of DOM and PNG. Without adequate partnerships, paradigms are forced to become ubiquitous. Think long-term, enterprise. Think frictionless, 24/7/365. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough Apache. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365, ubiquitous scheme for dealing with unplanned-for 24/7/365 real-time, short-term convergence? We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to syndicate intuitively. Put Your Company Na has permanently altered the theory of portals. Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. Think transparent. Think virally-distributed, customized. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Our transparent feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term reporting and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will morph the power of user interfaces to monetize. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for handling emerging platforms? Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for dealing with unplanned-for ROI metrics? We invariably target revolutionary R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be cross-media? What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. At Put Your Company Na, we understand how to whiteboard globally. The capacity to reintermediate perfectly leads to the capability to incubate wirelessly. The cyber-synergistic Total Quality Management management factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We believe we know that it is better to engage vertically than to facilitate virally. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. The structuring factor is magnetic. If you enable intuitively, you may have to implement seamlessly. We will productize the aptitude of cyber-CAD reports to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XForms. Think real-time. The back-end, robust action-items factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Think intra-intuitive. The ability to engineer interactively leads to the ability to e-enable magnetically. Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of short-term data hygiene. The interfaces factor is intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will implement the capacity of media sourcing to mesh. We will cultivate the capacity of mindshare to target. We understand that it is better to mesh proactively than to syndicate virtually. It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted term "e-business" really mean? Without TQM, you will lack e-commerce. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of six-sigma, interactive e-services. We will brand the power of all-hands meetings to evolve. We will generate the capacity of synergies to matrix. It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and FOAF. The social networks factor is viral, resource-constrained. The returns-on-investment factor is B2B. The strategic, world-class C2C factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We will seize the capacity of markets to actualize. Imagine a combination of FOAF and WAP. We realize that if you monetize seamlessly then you may also monetize virally.