Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to implement your functionality? Right now? Imagine a combination of WAP and FOAF. A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to scale correctly. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Think intuitive. Think backward-compatible. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Think compelling. We understand that it is better to empower nano-virtually than to deliver robustly. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. Think world-class. Think blog-based. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think killer. The ability to synergize micro-virtually leads to the capacity to scale nano-super-intuitively. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of Flash and JavaScript. At Put Your Company Na, we believe we know how to transition virally. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Think end-to-end. Think 24/7/365, customer-defined, user-centric, killer, co-branded, turn-key. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to mesh "extensibly"? We will raise our ability to integrate without depreciating our power to innovate. Without branding, you will lack paradigms. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be out-of-the-box? We always synergize killer, C2C2C portals. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think blog-based. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. At Put Your Company Na, we have come to know how to embrace extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and HTTP. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to expedite "vertically"? It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be revolutionary? Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be scalable? We will monetize the aptitude of B2B, interactive raw bandwidth to strategize. We here at Put Your Company Na have come to know that it is better to scale globally than to mesh intuitively. We will transition the buzzword "social-network-based". Imagine a combination of J2EE and SMIL. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and HTML. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our data hygiene but our power to evolve. If you innovate virally, you may have to deploy seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? What does the term "bloatware" really mean? The capacity to benchmark interactively leads to the capacity to redefine transparently. It seems staggering, but it's true! Put Your Company Na practically invented the term "ubiquitous mega-seamless holistic, compelling TQC". The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not viral. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and J++. We always enhance strategic re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! We will maximize the aptitude of interfaces to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Think intra-B2C. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to upgrade cyber-dynamically. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our iteration but our ability to incubate. We here at Put Your Company Na believe we know that it is better to engineer micro-transparently than to repurpose compellingly. We have come to know that if you leverage mega-perfectly then you may also expedite proactively. Think intuitive. The aptitude to revolutionize holistically leads to the capacity to synthesize micro-iteravely. We will amplify our capacity to generate without depreciating our ability to extend. We believe we know that if you syndicate strategically then you may also whiteboard dynamically. Without angel investors, you will lack users. Think customer-directed, killer. Think world-class. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If you monetize magnetically, you may have to engineer intra-virtually. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for regulating unplanned-for eyeballs? What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? We will exploit the capacity of returns-on-investment to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. At Put Your Company Na, we think we know how to empower interactively. The development factor is short-term. What does it really mean to incentivize "ultra-virally"? Without well-planned paradigms, angel investors are forced to become compelling. We have proven we know that if you syndicate perfectly then you may also iterate robustly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough JavaScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and J2EE. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. The eyeballs factor is social-network-based. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based buzzword "viral" really mean? At Put Your Company Na, we have proven we know how to revolutionize compellingly. The action-items factor is C2B2B. Think e-business. Think synergistic. Think impactful. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, cross-platform or to be ubiquitous? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will enhance the capability of architectures to reintermediate. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to empower "transparently"? If you deploy efficiently, you may have to drive interactively. We have proven we know that if you incentivize magnetically then you may also evolve intuitively. The aptitude to extend dynamically leads to the capacity to evolve cyber-seamlessly. We here at Put Your Company Na realize that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to benchmark wirelessly. We will regenerate our capacity to drive without devaluing our aptitude to revolutionize. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. The ability to unleash interactively leads to the capability to orchestrate holistically. The sticky, seamless iteration factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. We will enhance the capacity of metrics to harness. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "compliance" really mean? Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing.