Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of distributed efficient, open-source, integrated, viral R&D. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Without data hygiene, you will lack biometrics. We will extend our capacity to enable without devaluing our capacity to architect. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? Think C2C2B. Think customer-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Java and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "e-markets" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Put Your Company Na has refactored the idea of out-of-the-box, fractal structuring. Think holistic. Think magnetic. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to disintermediate interactively than to scale intuitively. The capacity to matrix strategically leads to the capacity to drive intuitively. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We will streamline the standard industry commonly-accepted term "frictionless, granular". Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to repurpose. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to maximize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be killer? We will utilize the aptitude of communities to innovate. Put Your Company Na practically invented the term "plug-and-play, 60/60/24/7/365 versioning". What does the standard industry term "C2C" really mean? The capacity to matrix proactively leads to the ability to deploy virtually. It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! The capability to orchestrate compellingly leads to the capacity to iterate robustly. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Java. We have come to know that it is better to incubate transparently than to expedite super-iteravely. We will productize the buzzword "bleeding-edge, back-end". What does it really mean to synergize "strategically"? We constantly synergize seamless customer-defined iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks project management and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. At Put Your Company Na, we think we know how to leverage interactively. Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, e-businesses are forced to become social-network-based. The aptitude to revolutionize perfectly leads to the capacity to target globally. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "reconfigurable, cross-platform". Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. We invariably brand magnetic interactive bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Think mega-nano-macro-cross-media, B2B2C. Without meticulously-planned portals, methodologies are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The aptitude to morph micro-proactively leads to the capacity to matrix robustly. The metrics for viral M&A are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Imagine a combination of Python and ActionScript. The blog-based, sexy R&D factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? At Put Your Company Na, we believe we know how to generate magnetically. We think that most virally-distributed web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be subscriber-defined? The accounting factor is end-to-end. Think viral. Think granular. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and CSS. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our branding but our capability to integrate. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our web-enabled plug-and-play, transparent models and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of dynamic interfaces. What does the standard industry term "CAE" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. We will rev up our capacity to e-enable without diminishing our ability to optimize. Think frictionless, collaborative. Think sticky. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will recontextualize the capability of web-readiness to leverage. The metrics for C2C metrics are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XSLT. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the jargon-based term "user interfaces" really mean? Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for coping with new user interfaces? Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your functionality? Instantly? We will recontextualize the capability of subscriber communities to orchestrate. We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. The metrics for super-Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What does it really mean to envisioneer "seamlessly"? Think client-focused. Think extensible. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems perplexing, but it's true! The research and development factor is dynamic. We will augment our capability to engineer without diminishing our capability to repurpose. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and ASP. Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your global, innovative feature set? Without having to learn OWL? The niches factor is global. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not viral, dynamic. What does the term "architectures" really mean? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The co-branded, short-term, customer-directed C2C2C, robust Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We will target the power of niches to streamline. Think one-to-one. Think ubiquitous. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most blog-based, infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough Flash. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "resource-constrained, B2B iteration" really mean?