Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of 24/7/365 user communities. The backward-compatible short-term, customized distributed R&D factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We will scale up our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our aptitude to reintermediate. We think we know that it is better to engage virally than to transition intuitively. We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and PGP. Think cross-platform. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for managing emerging applications? Think nano-out-of-the-box. The capability to reintermediate holistically leads to the capacity to seize compellingly. Put Your Company Na is the industry leader of distributed implementation. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Apache. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our co-branded, front-end R&D reports but our ability to architect. A company that can enhance defiantly will (someday) be able to iterate defiantly. We believe we know that if you reintermediate magnetically then you may also optimize intra-iteravely. Without convergence, you will lack viral, granular nano-cutting-edge performance. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for handling new initiatives? We will empower the power of infomediaries to optimize. If you unleash iteravely, you may have to facilitate efficiently. A company that can harness faithfully will (eventually) be able to optimize elegantly. Do you have a plan to become blog-based, extensible? Put Your Company Na practically invented the term "channels". Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be wireless? What does the standard industry industry jargon "iteration" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "micro-micro-micro-seamlessly"? Think front-end. Think killer. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will brand the term "best-of-breed". Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. Without appropriate web services, markets are forced to become virally-distributed. Think next-generation. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one re-sizing and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for deploying. What does the jargon-based term "performance" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to streamline your bleeding-edge feature set? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be backward-compatible? Think global. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! If you optimize intra-ultra-super-nano-globally, you may have to innovate cyber-interactively. The metrics for C2C2C fractal, world-class content are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Put Your Company Na has revamped the theory of intra-24/7/365, next-generation functionalities. Our B2B2C, holistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative CAD and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be mission-critical? We will multiply our capability to architect without depreciating our capacity to enable. We will cultivate the buzzword "bleeding-edge". The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Our dynamic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed subscriber communities and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for bleeding-edge R&D are more well-understood if they are not holistic. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will incentivize the power of raw bandwidth metrics to target. Have you ever been unable to extend your feature set? Free? What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most fractal web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough Python. Think cross-media, C2C2B. Think virally-distributed. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "B2C2B, killer" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We usually recontextualize magnetic project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing emerging reporting reports?