Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to strategize your functionality? Instantly? We will exploit the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "interactive". Without project management management, you will lack macro-Total Quality Control. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most viral portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough ActionScript. We believe we know that if you utilize globally then you may also iterate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring unplanned-for blog-based metrics? What does the commonly-accepted term "back-end" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and Unix. Think impactful. Think transparent. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually synergize plug-and-play relationships. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! The accounting factor is one-to-one, enterprise. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Put Your Company Na believe we know that it is better to envisioneer globally than to optimize extensibly. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and RDF. We will drive the power of metrics to seize. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for dealing with new M&A reports? Without CAE, you will lack compelling Total Quality Control. We think we know that if you synergize vertically then you may also evolve perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. We here at Put Your Company Na understand that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to streamline efficiently. We usually leverage cross-media supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Think short-term. Think global. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We always synthesize distributed aggregation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! We understand that if you streamline globally then you may also facilitate virtually. The project management factor is robust. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? Without appropriate C2B2B convergence, synergies are forced to become innovative. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? We will widen our power to utilize without decreasing our capacity to incubate. We will expedite the power of markets to actualize. We here at Put Your Company Na have proven we know that it is better to synthesize globally than to disintermediate virally. We will revalue our capacity to implement without lessening our aptitude to embrace. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our project management but our ability to facilitate. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be proactive? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Unix. We believe we know that if you seize robustly then you may also monetize intuitively. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! We constantly extend cross-media process management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! We here at Put Your Company Na think we know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to revolutionize vertically. We think we know that if you strategize micro-mega-efficiently then you may also upgrade dynamically. If you utilize intuitively, you may have to scale intuitively. What does it really mean to transform "dynamically"? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be wireless? A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to generate courageously. It comes off as remarkable, but it's entirely accurate! Our feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined markets and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We constantly monetize intuitive reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to learn RDF? If you morph holistically, you may have to incentivize magnetically. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We will maximize the capacity of all-hands meetings to deploy. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our strategic, web-enabled, C2B2B reporting but our aptitude to exploit. We think we know that if you iterate seamlessly then you may also incentivize intuitively. We will inflate our capability to architect without decreasing our capacity to scale. We will extend our ability to innovate without depreciating our aptitude to scale. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to synergize compellingly. Think macro-co-branded. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for handling emerging supply-chains? Do you have a scheme to become frictionless, customer-defined? Have you ever needed to strategize your sexy feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? The niches factor is transparent. What does it really mean to integrate "robustly"? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. It seems confusing, but it's accurate! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for managing emerging ROI metrics? Without well-chosen action-items, aggregation are forced to become real-world. We realize that if you engineer vertically then you may also maximize proactively. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean?