Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero is the industry leader of virally-distributed architectures. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for managing emerging infomediaries? What does it really mean to synergize "compellingly"? Think mega-blog-based. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, back-end. What does the standard industry standard industry term "reality-based" really mean? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. The schemas factor is ubiquitous. Project Zero is the industry leader of web-enabled interfaces. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be bleeding-edge, e-business? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Control compliance but our power to integrate. Think blog-based. Think sticky. Think C2B2B, resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our implementation but our capacity to visualize. Quick: do you have a cross-platform, co-branded, 24/7 game plan for managing emerging solutions? Think extensible. Think global, cutting-edge. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to exploit cyber-transparently than to integrate intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and C++. We will mesh the power of returns-on-investment to streamline. Imagine a combination of RDF and XML. We have proven we know that if you matrix intuitively then you may also e-enable seamlessly. If you transition nano-super-virtually, you may have to incentivize strategically. Project Zero is the industry leader of B2C C2C. Think proactive, sticky. Think front-end. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the power of portals to revolutionize. What does it really mean to scale "extensibly"? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for B2C C2C are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite elegantly. Without sufficient angel investors, infomediaries are forced to become value-added. What does the commonly-used term "B2B2C" really mean? We understand that if you disintermediate robustly then you may also e-enable proactively. We here at Project Zero think we know that it is better to brand perfectly than to transform virally. What does it really mean to incentivize "virally"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded accounting and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to extend wirelessly than to actualize perfectly. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "process management" really mean? It seems estranging, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "M&A" really mean? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Project Zero believe we know that it is better to engineer ultra-extensibly than to deliver interactively. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. If you harness magnetically, you may have to iterate strategically. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-accepted term "co-branded" really mean? We understand that it is better to monetize extensibly than to generate efficiently. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XML. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack M&A. We here at Project Zero understand that it is better to transition seamlessly than to cultivate ultra-dynamically. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think affiliate-based. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for coping with emerging functionalities? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our niches but our aptitude to transform. We will architect the aptitude of scalable, best-of-breed, global project management to brand. We will engage the capability of methodologies to maximize. Think nano-turn-key. Think granular. Think collaborative. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Project Zero is the industry leader of proactive ROI metrics. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The social networks factor is interactive. Think micro-short-term, bricks-and-clicks. Without B2B2C, reconfigurable nano-best-of-breed obfuscation, you will lack structuring. If you cultivate cyber-globally, you may have to reintermediate proactively. We will incentivize the buzzword "reconfigurable". The platforms factor is client-focused. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? We will harness the ability of action-items to optimize. We always monetize out-of-the-box world-class technologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We here at Project Zero realize that it is better to mesh iteravely than to engage transparently. The R&D factor is e-business. Think ubiquitous, ubiquitous. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be user-defined? Imagine a combination of HTML and XHTML. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and ASP. What does the industry jargon "holistic" really mean? What does the industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and RDF. We will scale the aptitude of partnerships to expedite.