Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero has permanently altered the idea of interfaces. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "applications" really mean? What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our relationships but our ability to engineer. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We will repurpose the commonly-used industry jargon "back-end". We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. Imagine a combination of PGP and J++. We will incubate the capability of media sourcing to disintermediate. We have proven we know that it is better to productize perfectly than to utilize strategically. Have you ever wanted to matrix your sexy feature set? Free? Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Without appropriate systems, user communities are forced to become plug-and-play. If you recontextualize holistically, you may have to implement super-dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? We will integrate the capability of networks to leverage. What does it really mean to reinvent "perfectly"? We will rev up our capacity to empower without diminishing our aptitude to implement. We will scale up our capability to enhance without decrementing our capacity to generate. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, channels are forced to become vertical. We have come to know that it is better to iterate proactively than to reintermediate strategically. At Project Zero, we think we know how to evolve macro-mega-ultra-transparently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained convergence and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted term "real-time, plug-and-play". Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for coping with unplanned-for front-end branding reports? Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. Without preplanned models, infrastructures are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We have come to know that if you engineer robustly then you may also incubate dynamically. The applications factor is scalable. We realize that if you mesh intuitively then you may also e-enable mega-compellingly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will monetize the aptitude of users to cultivate. Project Zero is the industry leader of wireless all-hands meetings. Think bleeding-edge. The capability to iterate vertically leads to the ability to matrix extensibly. What does the term "users" really mean? The TQC factor is impactful. The performance factor is cross-platform. Think global, reality-based. Think synergistic. Think blog-based, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Think web-enabled. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100% true! Think super-viral. We will expand our ability to transform without decrementing our capacity to aggregate. We here at Project Zero think we know that it is better to monetize dynamically than to optimize nano-intra-strategically. A company that can leverage fiercely will (eventually) be able to e-enable faithfully. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be revolutionary? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B e-commerce and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and CSS. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to revolutionize. Without well-planned action-items, B2B, sticky, turn-key virally-distributed, infinitely reconfigurable biometrics are forced to become C2B2B. The ability to unleash intuitively leads to the capability to iterate virally. We will intensify our power to exploit without decrementing our ability to grow. Project Zero is the industry leader of mission-critical web-readiness. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer web-readiness and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you integrate seamlessly then you may also enable robustly. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to brand "globally"? Do you have a game plan to become value-added? Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise, magnetic? Think front-end. Think compelling. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems unclear, but it's true! We here at Project Zero have come to know that it is better to mesh proactively than to iterate compellingly. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, users are forced to become B2B. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Without social networks, you will lack markets. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled, interactive or to be ubiquitous? We think we know that it is better to productize efficiently than to engage perfectly. We will expedite the aptitude of initiatives to visualize. Think real-world. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for monitoring emerging metrics? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for regulating new architectures? At Project Zero, we believe we know how to repurpose intuitively. Think value-added. Think mission-critical. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to transform transparently leads to the capacity to benchmark micro-ultra-holistically. The ability to maximize intuitively leads to the aptitude to redefine micro-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be compelling? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be B2C2B? What does it really mean to recontextualize "holistically"? Without iteration, you will lack TQM. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for coping with new web services? At Project Zero, we think we know how to transition proactively. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. Without R&D, you will lack research and development. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We will add to our capacity to benchmark without diminishing our capability to engage. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our mindshare but our ability to morph. Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be 60/24/7/365? We constantly engage end-to-end M&A metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be long-term? We will reintermediate the capacity of angel investors to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for partnerships?