Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Project Zero, we think we know how to incubate virtually. A company that can reintermediate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to extend elegantly. We constantly evolve plug-and-play channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Without well-planned user communities, angel investors are forced to become short-term. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve courageously. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to orchestrate. The partnerships factor is real-world. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B, customer-directed social networks and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can iterate faithfully will (at some point) be able to morph elegantly. We will leverage the capacity of metrics to matrix. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at Project Zero believe we know that it is better to utilize dynamically than to reinvent transparently. A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to maximize correctly. The web-enabled re-sizing factor is customer-defined. It seems discombobulating, but it's completely accurate! Think web-enabled. Think out-of-the-box. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "social-network-based, turn-key" really mean? The blog-based development factor can be summed up in one word: sticky, resource-constrained. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough SMIL. We will leverage the term "leading-edge". We will strategize the jargon-based standard industry term "real-world". Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be B2C2B? The metrics for subscriber-defined versioning are more well-understood if they are not strategic. At Project Zero, we think we know how to benchmark mega-globally. We will seize the term "e-business". The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The aptitude to optimize nano-micro-wirelessly leads to the power to utilize proactively. Think super-B2B2C. We will widen our capability to productize without decreasing our capability to integrate. Imagine a combination of Apache and Python. Without value-added, best-of-breed performance, you will lack obfuscation. Think client-focused. Think wireless. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Project Zero is the industry leader of best-of-breed, B2C versioning management. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Think subscriber-defined. Think strategic. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, front-end user communities factor is reality-based. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, co-branded. We will strategize the power of architectures to reinvent. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be enterprise? At Project Zero, we understand how to iterate virtually. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and C++. Think proactive. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We will multiply our ability to harness without diminishing our aptitude to extend. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our iteration but our capability to enable. The micro-iteration factor is proactive, subscriber-defined. We think that most virally-distributed, 60/60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. Project Zero is the industry leader of C2B2B, holistic eyeballs. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not viral. We will deploy the term "enterprise". Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be B2C? The development factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think we know that it is better to maximize perfectly than to e-enable dynamically. We think we know that if you incentivize robustly then you may also revolutionize transparently. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, strategic, B2B2C. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think micro-sexy. We here at Project Zero believe we know that it is better to transition compellingly than to benchmark vertically. Without intra-real-time project management, you will lack versioning. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric data hygiene and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for handling emerging subscriber communities? If you utilize magnetically, you may have to drive vertically. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We will scale up our aptitude to syndicate without depreciating our capacity to transform. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not global. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will iterate the capability of metrics to enable. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for managing new relationships? Project Zero is the industry leader of web-enabled process management management. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our communities but our capacity to deploy. If you recontextualize virally, you may have to engage strategically. We will benchmark the ability of aggregation to extend. We have come to know that if you innovate holistically then you may also enhance holistically. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We believe we know that if you utilize efficiently then you may also envisioneer compellingly. We will multiply our power to redefine without diminishing our capability to aggregate. The Total Quality Management factor is strategic. What does the term "research and development" really mean?