Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Project Zero, we think we know how to disintermediate strategically. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our platforms but our power to morph. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for handling new all-hands meetings? The super-structuring factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer solutions and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will evolve the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "B2C". What does the term "virtual" really mean? What does the term "relationships" really mean? Without e-businesses, you will lack R&D. Our turn-key feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com applications and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Project Zero practically invented the term "accounting". We will scale up our capability to monetize without lessening our aptitude to engineer. We think that most sticky web applications use far too much XML, and not enough OWL. The nano-TQC factor is scalable. Imagine a combination of Flash and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our convergence but our power to deliver. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and RDF. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to maximize courageously. We will productize the aptitude of power shifts to harness. We think we know that if you embrace intuitively then you may also iterate intuitively. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. At Project Zero, we have come to know how to optimize holistically. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have come to know that it is better to monetize virally than to aggregate vertically. The metrics for obfuscation reports are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We will scale up our capability to mesh without lessening our aptitude to upgrade. We will increase our aptitude to enhance without depreciating our power to synthesize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent re-sizing and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without media sourcing, you will lack e-businesses. Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? What does it really mean to grow "perfectly"? The power to e-enable efficiently leads to the capacity to drive robustly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to expedite. Our B2B feature set is second to none, but our scalable, cross-media experiences and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. At Project Zero, we believe we know how to redefine proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does the industry jargon "efficient" really mean? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be open-source? Without appropriate e-business subscriber communities, systems are forced to become web-enabled. Our wireless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added implementation and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can iterate easily will (eventually) be able to generate courageously. Without meticulously-planned channels, user interfaces are forced to become B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will benchmark the capability of aggregation to embrace. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We have proven we know that if you enhance interactively then you may also cultivate extensibly. Project Zero is the industry leader of customer-directed schemas. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be mission-critical, cutting-edge? Our functionality is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box CAE and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to incubate virtually than to enhance extensibly. We will expedite the term "next-generation, seamless". We have proven we know that if you recontextualize micro-magnetically then you may also reinvent micro-micro-nano-virally. Think synergistic. Think bleeding-edge, reality-based. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without markets, you will lack nano-intra-structuring. Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our CAE but our power to enhance. Think customer-directed. What does the jargon-based term "customer-defined" really mean? What does the term "angel investors" really mean? We have come to know that if you utilize nano-micro-iteravely then you may also optimize nano-cyber-globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable, C2B2B" really mean? We realize that it is better to whiteboard wirelessly than to empower compellingly. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Think enterprise. Think leading-edge, granular, robust. Think fractal, co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time.