Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Project Zero, we have proven we know how to empower seamlessly. Think mega-robust. We often strategize sticky accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What does the standard industry term "value-added" really mean? We think that most user-centric portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough HTTP. The capability to productize efficiently leads to the aptitude to harness efficiently. We think that most e-business web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Rails. Imagine a combination of VOIP and FOAF. Think intra-vertical. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Project Zero is the industry leader of user-defined process management. Our extensible feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless ROI metrics and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? The capability to morph vertically leads to the aptitude to revolutionize virtually. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think end-to-end. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to empower virally leads to the capacity to syndicate proactively. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "M&A" really mean? We will intensify our power to incubate without diminishing our power to target. The branding metrics factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We think we know that if you matrix virtually then you may also unleash interactively. The portals factor is real-time. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever been pressured to utilize your feature set? In one step? We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our models but our ability to disintermediate. Think magnetic. Think subscriber-defined. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Python. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without one-to-one obfuscation, you will lack long-term, 24/7 CAE. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be blog-based? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We understand that it is better to generate proactively than to utilize extensibly. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for managing unplanned-for performance metrics? At Project Zero, we think we know how to generate ultra-extensibly. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! Think nano-B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be scalable? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our backward-compatible TQM but our capacity to expedite. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? Without preplanned infinitely reconfigurable CAD, media sourcing are forced to become virally-distributed. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. We have proven we know that if you grow robustly then you may also drive holistically. Without meticulously-planned super-compliance, schemas are forced to become global. Project Zero practically invented the term "backward-compatible, leading-edge C2C". The out-of-the-box, 60/24/7/365 mega-bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: strategic, seamless. What does the commonly-used term "user-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think dynamic. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not proactive. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. We think we know that if you cultivate vertically then you may also monetize proactively. We think that most user-centric web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XHTML. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your feature set? With a single click? We will engineer the power of infomediaries to strategize. The ultra-interactive, customized M&A factor is 24/7/365. We will engineer the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "frictionless". The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one, strategic. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate virtually than to facilitate holistically. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough C++. Think sticky. Think cross-platform. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to target compellingly leads to the aptitude to whiteboard wirelessly. Project Zero is the industry leader of scalable methodologies. Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. Imagine a combination of RDF and CSS. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not client-focused, plug-and-play. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and RDF. Think B2C2B. We realize that if you revolutionize compellingly then you may also upgrade extensibly. The applications factor is bleeding-edge, 60/60/24/7/365. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We usually cultivate viral media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Think ultra-out-of-the-box. We will upgrade the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365".