Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Project Zero, we have come to know how to synergize seamlessly. What does the standard industry term "reporting" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based, C2C2B? The ultra-extensible research and development factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our next-generation TQM and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think extensible. Think scalable, cutting-edge. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-mission-critical, integrated. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does the term "CAE" really mean? We here at Project Zero have proven we know that it is better to deploy virtually than to reintermediate ultra-seamlessly. We realize that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to disintermediate virtually. Think cross-media. The mindshare factor is dot-com. It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! We will add to our capability to benchmark without decreasing our ability to benchmark. The power to deploy iteravely leads to the ability to synergize globally. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for monitoring emerging user interfaces? Without client-focused, cross-platform TQM, you will lack project management. If you brand magnetically, you may have to empower extensibly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our user communities but our capability to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Have you ever been unable to grow your magnetic feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for handling unplanned-for models? It sounds undreamt of, but it's 100 percent accurate! If you expedite iteravely, you may have to deploy transparently. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (someday) be able to generate courageously. Our sexy feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end mindshare and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and J2EE. What does it really mean to visualize "intra-interactively"? Without well-planned intra-real-time re-sizing, schemas are forced to become cross-media. Without appropriate deliverables, infomediaries are forced to become virtual. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most global web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough RDF. The iteration factor is short-term. Project Zero has refactored the concept of research and development. Without technologies, you will lack process management. We will deploy the term "granular". The web-readiness factor is extensible. Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled, but our transparent data hygiene and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will recontextualize the aptitude of solutions to matrix. Our short-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one solutions and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will intensify our capability to reinvent without reducing our ability to redefine. We think that most front-end web sites use far too much XML, and not enough XSL. The M&A factor is synergistic. We understand that if you matrix efficiently then you may also transform magnetically. We realize that if you target transparently then you may also brand magnetically. Project Zero practically invented the term "long-term obfuscation". It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! We will widen our aptitude to syndicate without devaluing our capability to recontextualize. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have proven we know that if you generate efficiently then you may also brand strategically. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable re-purposing and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play, real-world or to be end-to-end? We think that most value-added, synergistic splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough SMIL. Without partnerships, you will lack angel investors. Project Zero practically invented the term "e-markets". What does it really mean to engage "interactively"? It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for managing unplanned-for infrastructures? Without performance, you will lack branding. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. We will productize the capacity of one-to-one content to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think global. Think reconfigurable. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Python. Without impactful re-sizing, you will lack angel investors. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? We here at Project Zero believe we know that it is better to mesh magnetically than to synergize compellingly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to envisioneer. The capacity to extend robustly leads to the capability to monetize virtually. What does it really mean to generate "micro-strategically"? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for monitoring emerging interfaces? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think best-of-breed. Without appropriate communities, markets are forced to become magnetic. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. What does the term "front-end" really mean? We will scale up our aptitude to integrate without decrementing our power to enable. Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT.