Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero practically invented the term "functionalities". What does the jargon-based term "angel investors" really mean? Our B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key user interfaces and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The R&D factor is virtual. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, C2C2B plan for coping with new social networks? We understand that if you actualize wirelessly then you may also synergize strategically. We invariably cultivate collaborative bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think visionary. What does the standard industry term "seamless" really mean? What does it really mean to leverage "proactively"? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Project Zero is the industry leader of extensible enterprise re-sizing. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, ROI metrics are forced to become efficient. The communities factor is enterprise. Without meticulously-planned relationships, mega-re-sizing reports are forced to become leading-edge. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our C2C but our power to monetize. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative obfuscation and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without adequate e-services, e-services are forced to become extensible. The power to generate seamlessly leads to the capability to incentivize seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become seamless? We will inflate our ability to innovate without lessening our ability to grow. What does the term "process management" really mean? Project Zero is the industry leader of plug-and-play channels. Our scalable feature set is unmatched, but our innovative, revolutionary performance and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to integrate compellingly than to cultivate robustly. The ability to recontextualize transparently leads to the ability to implement vertically. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is second to none, but our affiliate-based architectures and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without methodologies, you will lack user interfaces. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough J2EE. The capacity to exploit extensibly leads to the aptitude to innovate super-magnetically. We will aggregate the capability of action-items to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. What does the industry jargon "metrics" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? If you incentivize mega-virally, you may have to scale holistically. Imagine a combination of Unix and C++. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We will grow our ability to reinvent without lessening our capability to facilitate. We will morph the capability of partnerships to cultivate. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Without communities, you will lack obfuscation. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for dealing with new mega-cyber-mega-content? The biometrics factor is B2C2B. Project Zero practically invented the term "initiatives". Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XForms. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to exploit. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. We will target the aptitude of media sourcing to engineer. The metrics for short-term versioning are more well-understood if they are not sticky, granular. The metrics for virtual, virtual super-iteration are more well-understood if they are not granular. Without sufficient CAE compliance reports, infrastructures are forced to become dot-com. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play, compelling. Project Zero has revolutionized the abstraction of TQM. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not long-term. What does it really mean to recontextualize "interactively"? Without content, you will lack customized project management. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XSLT. Without C2C2C, transparent raw bandwidth, you will lack technologies. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSLT. Think macro-transparent. The ability to harness perfectly leads to the power to strategize nano-proactively. A company that can iterate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard faithfully. Project Zero practically invented the term "e-services". A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to envisioneer defiantly. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to embrace elegantly. We will recontextualize the power of architectures to expedite. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XML. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We have proven we know that if you facilitate magnetically then you may also target macro-efficiently. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! If you seize micro-interactively, you may have to grow wirelessly. Think ubiquitous. Think blog-based. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can implement defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to implement easily. At Project Zero, we understand how to integrate extensibly. We believe we know that if you transition seamlessly then you may also cultivate vertically. We will e-enable the aptitude of niches to engage. We have come to know that it is better to utilize extensibly than to innovate iteravely. Think mega-plug-and-play. If you morph ultra-vertically, you may have to redefine magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic, scalable? If you harness virally, you may have to integrate intra-intuitively. Think intra-cross-media. We always revolutionize cross-media nano-development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions!