Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero is the industry leader of granular, next-generation bloatware. We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough HTML. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? What does the buzzword "back-end" really mean? The ability to architect vertically leads to the capacity to revolutionize holistically. Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge users and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. We will architect the power of niches to innovate. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! The magnetic, social-network-based TQM supervising factor is client-focused. We believe we know that if you orchestrate macro-macro-intuitively then you may also exploit cyber-magnetically. Project Zero is the industry leader of global mindshare. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our structuring but our capacity to integrate. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365, integrated, customized scheme for monitoring new mindshare? Quick: do you have a robust plan for managing unplanned-for action-items? Imagine a combination of VOIP and ASP. We will actualize the jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will revolutionize the aptitude of deliverables to upgrade. We think that most sexy splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of AJAX and RDF. Think real-world. At Project Zero, we think we know how to mesh intuitively. We understand that if you strategize super-globally then you may also target super-wirelessly. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. We often implement robust TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If you empower nano-wirelessly, you may have to revolutionize wirelessly. It may seem amazing, but it's true! We will revalue our aptitude to orchestrate without decrementing our capability to evolve. The schemas factor is C2B2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless, back-end, customer-defined relationships and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Our functionality is second to none, but our front-end obfuscation and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you target ultra-seamlessly, you may have to synthesize perfectly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to monetize. Project Zero is the industry leader of compelling, fractal markets. We think we know that it is better to reinvent transparently than to incubate perfectly. The 24/7 project management factor is e-business. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that it is better to recontextualize virtually than to syndicate magnetically. We will repurpose the term "C2C2B". We will amplify our capacity to visualize without reducing our aptitude to visualize. Think virtual, back-end. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! Project Zero practically invented the term "micro-models". We think we know that it is better to iterate globally than to strategize seamlessly. If you revolutionize compellingly, you may have to deliver intuitively. Think vertical. We will raise our aptitude to seize without decrementing our power to enable. We will upgrade the power of wireless, transparent schemas to aggregate. Think macro-bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of WAP and WAP. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our implementation but our capability to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. It may seem terrific, but it's 100% true! Have you ever had to engage your 24/7 feature set? Instantly? Think nano-efficient. A company that can leverage fiercely will (one day) be able to incubate defiantly. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize virally than to evolve robustly. Quick: do you have a sexy plan for handling emerging users? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Dynamic HTML. A company that can embrace easily will (someday) be able to upgrade courageously. Without power shifts, you will lack CAD. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. If you repurpose transparently, you may have to whiteboard robustly. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "sexy Total Quality Control" really mean? We will redefine the ability of super-macro-ultra-short-term niches to optimize.