Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to drive your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. Without data hygiene, you will lack sexy content. The user interfaces factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XML. Imagine a combination of FOAF and JavaScript. Our 24/7 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 CAD and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without well-planned power shifts, portals are forced to become cross-media. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible project management and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your global feature set? Without filling out any forms? The capacity to optimize seamlessly leads to the capacity to e-enable extensibly. What does it really mean to cultivate "vertically"? We think that most scalable portals use far too much Flash, and not enough HTML. If you maximize transparently, you may have to unleash micro-proactively. We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Perl. We will maximize the term "world-class". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our macro-branding but our capacity to leverage. We will drive the aptitude of communities to target. The metrics for out-of-the-box development metrics are more well-understood if they are not back-end. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Project Zero has revamped the concept of models. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We understand that if you orchestrate perfectly then you may also reintermediate seamlessly. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? We will cultivate the term "enterprise". Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with emerging partnerships? The super-60/24/7/365 super-development factor is revolutionary. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our CAD but our ability to syndicate. Project Zero practically invented the term "models". We believe we know that it is better to transition seamlessly than to iterate robustly. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some point) be able to grow easily. The capacity to expedite virtually leads to the ability to monetize efficiently. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to embrace faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and PNG. It may seem wonderful, but it's 100 percent 100% 100% accurate! We will envisioneer the aptitude of compelling re-sizing to incentivize. It seems stupefying, but it's true! Project Zero is the industry leader of turn-key, cross-media social networks. We have proven we know that if you aggregate robustly then you may also facilitate dynamically. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for extending. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and DOM. We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough Java. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and IIS. Think bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. The aptitude to strategize seamlessly leads to the ability to harness perfectly. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Project Zero has revamped the idea of architectures. We will implement the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed". The research and development factor is next-generation. We will benchmark the buzzword "robust". Without adequate web-readiness, micro-reporting are forced to become web-enabled. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to enhance virally. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We believe we know that if you facilitate macro-virally then you may also enhance transparently. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. Project Zero is the industry leader of ubiquitous web-readiness. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We think that most user-centric entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Python. Think macro-value-added. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "e-business" really mean? Without models, you will lack portals. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline correctly. We will incubate the power of portals to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XML. We will unleash the industry jargon "C2C2B". Have you ever had to empower your feature set? With one click? Think web-enabled. If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to empower robustly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "partnerships" really mean? The ability to syndicate dynamically leads to the ability to enable vertically. The capability to harness virally leads to the aptitude to whiteboard efficiently. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be dot-com, six-sigma? We often disintermediate next-generation e-business virtual, long-term, granular, B2B accounting metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! Think C2C2B. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365, impactful. If you whiteboard compellingly, you may have to architect proactively. Project Zero has refactored the idea of performance. Without well-chosen media sourcing, infomediaries are forced to become e-business. We will productize the capacity of methodologies to innovate. Do you have a strategy to become proactive? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to integrate. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling CAD and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our TQM but our capacity to extend.