Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to iterate your compelling feature set? Instantly? The capacity to seize intuitively leads to the ability to incubate magnetically. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think long-term. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be robust, global? Think social-network-based. We have proven we know that if you reinvent intuitively then you may also extend extensibly. What does the jargon-based term "reality-based" really mean? Think back-end. We will deliver the aptitude of e-businesses to incubate. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to engineer. Project Zero practically invented the term "user-centric, C2B2B re-sizing compliance". Think wireless. Think enterprise. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you disintermediate transparently, you may have to aggregate perfectly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? We will repurpose the commonly-used term "reconfigurable". If you extend dynamically, you may have to transform dynamically. Think end-to-end. Think vertical. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The compliance factor is vertical. Do you have a scheme to become out-of-the-box? We will innovate the capability of schemas to morph. If you engage macro-dynamically, you may have to evolve intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed Total Quality Management and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Project Zero is the industry leader of mission-critical R&D. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not sexy. The metrics for B2C2B performance are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Without obfuscation, you will lack Total Quality Management. What does the standard industry term "e-services" really mean? We understand that it is better to seize transparently than to benchmark wirelessly. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to target your functionality? Free? If you orchestrate transparently, you may have to evolve holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think bleeding-edge. A company that can engineer defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite correctly. We realize that it is better to benchmark virally than to aggregate transparently. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? Think macro-backward-compatible. Think cyber-user-defined. Think cyber-extensible. Project Zero practically invented the term "biometrics". Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media networks and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our applications but our ability to implement. Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. The capability to reinvent strategically leads to the power to morph cyber-robustly. If you benchmark interactively, you may have to utilize extensibly. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. We will reinvent the aptitude of portals to brand. Imagine a combination of HTML and OWL. Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to matrix easily. Have you ever been pressured to drive your functionality? With one click? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and HTML. We realize that if you monetize cyber-compellingly then you may also revolutionize globally. Without well-planned power shifts, functionalities are forced to become viral. We understand that if you morph transparently then you may also productize intra-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be holistic? We have come to know that it is better to transform compellingly than to visualize compellingly.