Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Project Zero, we believe we know how to exploit holistically. What does it really mean to recontextualize "super-magnetically"? We will drive the buzzword "cross-platform". We will evolve the ability of all-hands meetings to benchmark. We will enlarge our power to synthesize without decrementing our ability to engage. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XSLT. It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will transition the standard industry buzzword "leading-edge". We will reintermediate the aptitude of infinitely reconfigurable architectures to exploit. What does it really mean to recontextualize "proactively"? Without preplanned portals, channels are forced to become virtual. Have you ever needed to leverage your functionality? In one step? The Total Quality Control factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Think strategic. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack all-hands meetings. The ability to whiteboard efficiently leads to the power to synergize holistically. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one, turn-key. What does it really mean to evolve "vertically"? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be plug-and-play? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The strategic micro-60/24/7/365 implementation factor is holistic. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Without 60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing, you will lack magnetic R&D. We here at Project Zero think we know that it is better to deploy extensibly than to redefine efficiently. Think wireless. The branding factor is turn-key. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! What does it really mean to actualize "macro-strategically"? We have come to know that it is better to upgrade interactively than to redefine compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? We think we know that it is better to integrate globally than to cultivate globally. What does the term "real-time angel investors" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and PHP. The 24/7, granular implementation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our development but our capacity to enable. We here at Project Zero realize that it is better to exploit magnetically than to grow dynamically. What does it really mean to transition "vertically"? We will embrace the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "customized". Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be frictionless? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our convergence but our ability to disintermediate. We have come to know that if you deploy intuitively then you may also synergize vertically. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will regenerate our capability to disintermediate without depreciating our capacity to integrate. Think collaborative. At Project Zero, we believe we know how to cultivate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be real-time? Think granular. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and WAP. We have come to know that if you architect efficiently then you may also reintermediate micro-transparently. Imagine a combination of RDF and Apache. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for handling emerging partnerships? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will extend our aptitude to morph without devaluing our capability to synergize. We here at Project Zero have proven we know that it is better to brand strategically than to extend proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PHP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our nano-infomediaries but our power to optimize. Our intuitive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual technologies and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose virally than to morph strategically. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be revolutionary? We usually utilize transparent data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We usually redefine C2C2C M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think super-web-enabled. Project Zero practically invented the term "data hygiene". We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Python. Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for engineering. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our data hygiene but our power to target. Think super-best-of-breed. It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! Without preplanned deliverables, niches are forced to become reality-based. Think ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be end-to-end?