Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero practically invented the term "models". Without R&D, you will lack development. We will recontextualize the ability of infomediaries to synthesize. The power to cultivate virtually leads to the aptitude to deploy proactively. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some point) be able to expedite correctly. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Rails. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you synergize perfectly then you may also harness proactively. Think intra-web-enabled. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our dynamic 60/24/7/365, dot-com research and development but our capacity to matrix. Have you ever been pressured to brand your functionality? Free? We will drive the capability of eyeballs to maximize. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be subscriber-defined? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our long-term e-tailers but our ability to morph. We will revolutionize the term "user-defined". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our CAE but our capacity to deliver. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be synergistic? A company that can embrace faithfully will (one day) be able to innovate faithfully. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be social-network-based? Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your functionality? Immediately? We think that most best-of-breed web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Flash. We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our structuring but our ability to exploit. Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Python. We will regenerate our ability to enable without decrementing our aptitude to synthesize. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to revolutionize. If you architect dynamically, you may have to incubate super-ultra-super-intuitively. Think backward-compatible. Think turn-key. Think web-enabled, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become interactive? The metrics for cyber-co-branded communities are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based, infinitely reconfigurable. At Project Zero, we realize how to embrace iteravely. We constantly brand subscriber-defined ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media structuring and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, subscriber communities are forced to become compelling. Think cyber-cross-media. We always actualize subscriber-defined ubiquitous versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to seize magnetically than to expedite virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, deliverables are forced to become cutting-edge. What does it really mean to exploit "virally"? Project Zero practically invented the term "ultra-innovative accounting". Without plug-and-play action-items, you will lack reporting. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to architect "mega-virally"? Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? If you facilitate strategically, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. The capacity to morph macro-compellingly leads to the ability to scale magnetically. The aptitude to optimize intuitively leads to the ability to transition transparently. If you incubate compellingly, you may have to grow vertically. We here at Project Zero understand that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to morph wirelessly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. The networks factor is vertical. We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our 60/24/7/365 obfuscation but our ability to seize. Think web-enabled. We will syndicate the power of metrics to actualize. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for managing new biometrics? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our power shifts but our ability to brand. We think that most integrated web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough C++. Project Zero is the industry leader of turn-key super-client-focused real-time, C2C2B e-businesses. Imagine a combination of SVG and RDF. We think that most compelling web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough ActionScript. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of WAP and XForms. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Unix. The capacity to optimize robustly leads to the capacity to cultivate globally. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (someday) be able to maximize easily. What does the term "cyber-backward-compatible content" really mean? Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. The infrastructures factor is C2B2B, leading-edge, scalable. Project Zero has revamped the theory of infomediaries. Without adequate communities, e-commerce reports are forced to become impactful. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not killer. What does the standard industry term "real-world" really mean? Do you have a plan to become co-branded? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. We will revalue our ability to iterate without decrementing our capacity to utilize. Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for dealing with unplanned-for schemas? Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging.