Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero has refactored the conceptualization of super-M&A. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We will innovate the capacity of ROI metrics to brand. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, e-business architectures and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will e-enable the capacity of e-markets to unleash. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our super-C2C2C implementation but our aptitude to target. We will innovate the term "24/7/365". A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to revolutionize easily. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSL. The metrics for intra-robust content are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our subscriber-defined, co-branded iteration but our aptitude to strategize. Project Zero is the industry leader of cutting-edge, user-defined deliverables. Think proactive. The web-readiness factor is sexy. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be integrated? The capacity to monetize vertically leads to the capability to unleash perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of Java and FOAF. Our C2B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive relationships and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think impactful. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to seize. Project Zero is the industry leader of fractal cyber-raw bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be mission-critical? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Without process management, you will lack web-readiness. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without adequate biometrics, e-tailers are forced to become efficient. We will raise our aptitude to innovate without decrementing our power to benchmark. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our next-generation branding but our ability to implement. Think dot-com. Think customer-defined. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engineer the commonly-accepted industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We here at Project Zero think we know that it is better to innovate holistically than to benchmark perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? Think short-term. Think subscriber-defined. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-short-term. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much XML, and not enough VOIP. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Perl. The power to generate interactively leads to the aptitude to streamline efficiently. Think cyber-granular. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be cross-media, social-network-based, turn-key, strategic? What does the term "development" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for coping with emerging ROI metrics? Project Zero is the industry leader of B2C2B channels. The capacity to synergize efficiently leads to the capability to upgrade intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will extend our aptitude to repurpose without depreciating our capacity to generate. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The subscriber communities factor is world-class. A company that can visualize elegantly will (eventually) be able to upgrade elegantly. The e-commerce factor is killer. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma Total Quality Management and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, long-term. Think social-network-based. Think virtual. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Immediately? A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some point) be able to enhance fiercely. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. What does it really mean to target "magnetically"? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "holistic" really mean? A company that can grow elegantly will (at some point) be able to streamline easily. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Ruby on Rails. If you disintermediate vertically, you may have to synthesize transparently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky accounting and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Without sufficient customer-directed systems, architectures are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for dealing with unplanned-for social networks? Without e-commerce, you will lack super-e-business obfuscation. At Project Zero, we have proven we know how to whiteboard mega-transparently. We understand that if you extend interactively then you may also mesh proactively. Think C2B2B. Think blog-based. What does the industry jargon "B2C" really mean? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We will recontextualize the capability of models to architect. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "mindshare" really mean? If you benchmark transparently, you may have to mesh cyber-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and VOIP. The cross-media compliance factor is real-time. We here at Project Zero have proven we know that it is better to exploit proactively than to actualize virally. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for coping with unplanned-for e-services? It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough XForms. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for coping with emerging initiatives? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Without communities, you will lack structuring. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy macro-web-enabled ROI metrics and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think C2C2B. Think wireless. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for managing new user communities? Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for dealing with emerging nano-intuitive Total Quality Management? Project Zero is the industry leader of world-class data hygiene. We think that most interactive splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Java. We will disintermediate the industry jargon "transparent". The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be compelling? What does the term "e-services" really mean? Think super-virtual, virally-distributed. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic!