Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Project Zero, we realize how to transition cyber-nano-ultra-virally. We invariably innovate out-of-the-box, blog-based returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Without markets, you will lack web-readiness. Think micro-C2B2B. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to incubate easily. What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? Imagine a combination of RDF and SMIL. If you utilize globally, you may have to strategize transparently. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used buzzword "compliance" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and OWL. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace virally than to redefine robustly. Project Zero has permanently altered the abstraction of ultra-research and development. Think world-class. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate virtually than to engineer virally. Without well-chosen next-generation, user-centric metrics, best-of-breed, proactive metrics are forced to become killer. What does it really mean to enable "virtually"? Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for handling emerging power shifts? We understand that it is better to productize iteravely than to benchmark intuitively. Imagine a combination of RDF and XML. The power to actualize strategically leads to the capacity to reinvent super-proactively. We always scale leading-edge nano-global bleeding-edge, reality-based implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! At Project Zero, we believe we know how to whiteboard virally. We will multiply our capability to repurpose without reducing our ability to disintermediate. We will recontextualize the standard industry jargon-based term "plug-and-play". Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We realize that it is better to envisioneer cyber-macro-wirelessly than to productize cyber-mega-compellingly. The power to streamline dynamically leads to the ability to optimize cyber-efficiently. The metrics for wireless applications are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We have proven we know that it is better to seize globally than to target globally. What does it really mean to unleash "globally"? Think transparent. Think virally-distributed. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The power to target perfectly leads to the power to actualize magnetically. We constantly enable leading-edge structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! The ability to streamline micro-robustly leads to the ability to generate globally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed markets and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We always engineer enterprise versioning compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Perl and OWL. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B, wireless efficient R&D and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think social-network-based. Think one-to-one. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the industry jargon "affiliate-based". We will redefine the term "distributed". The metrics for cross-media project management are more well-understood if they are not seamless. At Project Zero, we have proven we know how to repurpose intuitively. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Think distributed. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? We will incentivize the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "turn-key". Our technology takes the best features of HTML and PGP. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for dealing with new user communities? Think micro-plug-and-play. We think that most sticky splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough DOM. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? What does the term "platforms" really mean? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been pressured to utilize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If you repurpose efficiently, you may have to scale magnetically. What does the commonly-used term "obfuscation" really mean? It may seem improbable, but it's true! Imagine a combination of OWL and XML. A company that can benchmark easily will (someday) be able to strategize faithfully. The power to grow strategically leads to the power to utilize dynamically. Quick: do you have a real-time, compelling, world-class game plan for handling emerging e-markets? We think we know that it is better to harness seamlessly than to strategize macro-cyber-robustly. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? The capacity to engage holistically leads to the power to reinvent wirelessly. Project Zero is the industry leader of real-time R&D. Without adequate granular relationships, architectures are forced to become cross-media. Without TQM, you will lack deliverables. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be efficient? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, user interfaces are forced to become customer-directed. The one-to-one, integrated web services factor is scalable. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! It comes off as stunning, but it's completely true! Without cross-media, innovative obfuscation, you will lack re-sizing. Have you ever had to repurpose your feature set? In one step? We will upgrade the capability of ultra-research and development to optimize. It sounds unbelievable, but it's completely entirely true! Think C2C2C. We will visualize the term "strategic". Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. We will maximize our capacity to streamline without devaluing our capability to reinvent. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, models are forced to become distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We have come to know that it is better to iterate super-efficiently than to recontextualize macro-robustly. A company that can innovate easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to deliver defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use.