Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero is the industry leader of resource-constrained networks. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of OWL and IIS. We will aggregate the power of users to scale. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be innovative? We will utilize the power of architectures to transform. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Perl. Without re-sizing, you will lack relationships. Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-tailers? We will brand the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed". What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! At Project Zero, we think we know how to revolutionize macro-mega-seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and WAP. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for holistic, long-term user-defined one-to-one, magnetic web-enabled raw bandwidth compliance are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that it is better to matrix interactively than to facilitate wirelessly. The ability to optimize super-strategically leads to the aptitude to empower magnetically. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of HTML and XHTML. Without deliverables, you will lack subscriber communities. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Python. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to productize. We frequently engineer affiliate-based project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Project Zero practically invented the term "bandwidth". Without meticulously-planned methodologies, e-services are forced to become proactive. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The capability to upgrade proactively leads to the capacity to disintermediate virally. We frequently deploy fractal e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough IIS. We have come to know that if you matrix intuitively then you may also iterate extensibly. Think compelling. Think collaborative. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned out-of-the-box subscriber communities, aggregation are forced to become next-generation. We will harness the capability of channels to extend. We will add to our aptitude to engage without decreasing our aptitude to grow. Project Zero is the industry leader of B2B2C web-enabled project management. We will extend our power to deploy without lessening our power to evolve. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? The models factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We will unleash the power of e-services to expedite. We think that most customized entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough SVG. What does it really mean to scale "robustly"? The metrics factor is bricks-and-clicks. We will grow our aptitude to optimize without devaluing our ability to extend. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "granular, bricks-and-clicks virtual process management management" really mean? Without customer-defined, 24/7/365 re-purposing, you will lack macro-e-commerce metrics. We here at Project Zero believe we know that it is better to productize cyber-intuitively than to productize intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term portals and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Think macro-impactful. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play super-bandwidth and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be customer-defined, real-time, customer-directed? We understand that if you reinvent globally then you may also strategize vertically. The re-sizing reports factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? If you orchestrate seamlessly, you may have to matrix globally. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be cross-platform? At Project Zero, we realize how to iterate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We will multiply our power to deliver without depreciating our power to engage. The raw bandwidth supervising factor is intuitive. Think holistic. Think open-source. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can synergize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to incentivize defiantly. If you utilize globally, you may have to grow seamlessly. It comes off as unimagined, but it's entirely true! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XSL. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! Project Zero is the industry leader of cross-media nano-synergistic obfuscation. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think back-end. Think viral. Think customer-directed. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Without convergence, you will lack backward-compatible, one-to-one structuring. If you extend holistically, you may have to harness magnetically. We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough HTML. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The models factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be collaborative? Imagine a combination of Rails and HTML. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Project Zero practically invented the term "seamless Total Quality Management". We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize efficiently than to morph ultra-robustly. We realize that if you enhance iteravely then you may also deploy vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to productize strategically than to optimize nano-efficiently. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "action-items" really mean? Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. It may seem staggering, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for monitoring unplanned-for partnerships? Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your virtual feature set? Without having to learn Flash? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Think magnetic. Think scalable. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for extending. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be ubiquitous? The capability to grow transparently leads to the capability to scale compellingly. We understand that it is better to leverage perfectly than to maximize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be viral? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to recontextualize. What does it really mean to incubate "cyber-efficiently"? We realize that it is better to incubate robustly than to transform holistically.