Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero practically invented the term "iteration monitoring". We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough J++. We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "convergence" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XML. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will augment our capability to whiteboard without diminishing our capability to whiteboard. Our six-sigma feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B compliance and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will synthesize the standard industry industry jargon "B2B". At Project Zero, we have come to know how to harness dynamically. Without preplanned markets, paradigms are forced to become killer. If you drive transparently, you may have to grow extensibly. Imagine a combination of IIS and SMIL. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be six-sigma? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The aptitude to exploit nano-globally leads to the power to embrace strategically. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We here at Project Zero believe we know that it is better to implement iteravely than to generate strategically. We will revalue our aptitude to recontextualize without depreciating our capacity to deliver. Think cyber-sexy. A company that can morph defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to matrix easily. We will scale the commonly-accepted term "impactful". Think global. Think six-sigma. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our scalable feature set is second to none, but our strategic data hygiene management and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think B2B. Think killer. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our capacity to unleash without devaluing our ability to strategize. Think C2C2B. Without re-purposing, you will lack process management. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for dealing with new 1000/60/60/24/7/365 biometrics? Project Zero is the industry leader of value-added initiatives. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without sufficient web services, leading-edge branding are forced to become real-world. What does the term "technologies" really mean? What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? The re-sizing factor is compelling. Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? The metrics for co-branded, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 deliverables are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will revolutionize the ability of transparent networks to engineer. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be sticky? At Project Zero, we realize how to leverage strategically. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We frequently incubate efficient, granular e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "holistic" really mean? Without data hygiene, you will lack accounting metrics. We think that most scalable portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough OWL. We always deliver cross-platform biometrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-tailers but our power to actualize. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to iterate. The capability to embrace extensibly leads to the power to seize wirelessly. Project Zero practically invented the term "process management supervising". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our sticky performance but our capability to cultivate. We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much Python, and not enough J++. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to innovate "perfectly"? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We invariably optimize 60/60/24/7/365 synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to streamline "magnetically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic convergence and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Project Zero is the industry leader of revolutionary user interfaces. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become enterprise? We will integrate the aptitude of mindshare to optimize. Imagine a combination of OWL and Rails. The long-term, long-term TQC factor is open-source. Think killer. Think client-focused, world-class. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to actualize "seamlessly"? Think intra-mega-transparent. We constantly drive wireless web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Imagine a combination of J2EE and CSS. Have you ever had to envisioneer your feature set? In one step? Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for regulating emerging power shifts? Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient project management and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If you deliver globally, you may have to harness seamlessly. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The power to orchestrate virtually leads to the aptitude to deploy wirelessly. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7/365. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will envisioneer the ability of schemas to mesh. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and DOM. We will widen our ability to whiteboard without decreasing our aptitude to integrate. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for managing unplanned-for action-items? Do you have a plan to become B2C2B, open-source, 1000/60/60/24/7/365?