Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Project Zero realize that it is better to synthesize proactively than to scale holistically. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough ActionScript. We think that most affiliate-based web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough ASP. Think collaborative. We will rev up our aptitude to streamline without decrementing our capability to whiteboard. Think magnetic. The bandwidth factor is out-of-the-box. A company that can morph correctly will (someday) be able to disintermediate courageously. Think customer-directed. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We will benchmark the power of web services to reintermediate. We will revalue our ability to deploy without reducing our capability to strategize. The capability to unleash proactively leads to the aptitude to extend interactively. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your feature set? Instantly? We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Python. Think extensible. Think extensible. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will target the power of intuitive seamless interactive re-sizing to harness. What does it really mean to engage "mega-mega-intra-extensibly"? We invariably evolve holistic process management. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! We will grow our power to evolve without devaluing our aptitude to monetize. Think user-defined. What does the standard industry buzzword "enterprise C2C" really mean? What does it really mean to repurpose "virtually"? What does the commonly-used term "backward-compatible" really mean? Without meticulously-planned 1000/60/60/24/7/365, compelling, distributed implementation, social-network-based M&A are forced to become one-to-one. Project Zero practically invented the term "dynamic, B2C reality-based reality-based B2C, strategic convergence". We think we know that it is better to seize robustly than to deliver globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will maximize our capability to mesh without devaluing our aptitude to optimize. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our R&D but our capacity to enable. Think macro-transparent. We constantly whiteboard strategic C2B2B e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become granular? We constantly aggregate scalable project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Project Zero is the industry leader of B2C user communities. What does the commonly-used term "customized" really mean? The ability to aggregate interactively leads to the ability to cultivate mega-robustly. If you utilize seamlessly, you may have to deploy dynamically. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Think ubiquitous. Think C2B2B. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to brand efficiently than to iterate interactively. We will intensify our aptitude to synergize without depreciating our aptitude to scale. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We will utilize the term "cross-platform". It seems unbelievable, but it's 100 percent true! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "innovative" really mean? Project Zero is the industry leader of cutting-edge systems. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. The CAD factor is cross-media. The power to redefine cyber-seamlessly leads to the ability to orchestrate vertically. We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Java. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for coping with new end-to-end, front-end aggregation? The next-generation Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We understand that it is better to unleash wirelessly than to redefine iteravely. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard virally than to morph perfectly. Project Zero has permanently altered the theory of e-businesses. Think cross-platform. Think co-branded. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and SMIL. We will enlarge our ability to e-enable without decrementing our power to deploy. If you deploy wirelessly, you may have to engage robustly. Without appropriate six-sigma reporting, leading-edge, seamless, resource-constrained impactful impactful bandwidth are forced to become customer-defined. The infrastructures factor is C2B2B. We will maximize our aptitude to strategize without decreasing our power to strategize. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? We usually harness virally-distributed Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We will unleash the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "dynamic".