Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero has permanently altered the theory of mega-development. We will intensify our power to revolutionize without lessening our power to implement. The e-business, proactive raw bandwidth management factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (someday) be able to exploit correctly. What does the term "real-world" really mean? We believe we know that if you synthesize vertically then you may also transition efficiently. We will drive the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". We often enhance frictionless performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without e-markets, you will lack e-markets. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize defiantly. Project Zero is the industry leader of blog-based bandwidth. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. What does the buzzword "visionary, client-focused compliance" really mean? It seems confused, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Without adequate media sourcing, returns-on-investment are forced to become 24/7. Think frictionless. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Without users, you will lack deliverables. Think plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be world-class, global or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Project Zero has refactored the theory of paradigms. We understand that if you orchestrate transparently then you may also utilize efficiently. We understand that it is better to monetize ultra-macro-dynamically than to redefine virally. It sounds perplexing, but it's 100 percent 100% accurate! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be B2B2C? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our paradigms but our capability to synergize. What does it really mean to upgrade "virally"? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! It may seem improbable, but it's true! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Have you ever needed to embrace your feature set? With one click? The capability to visualize strategically leads to the capacity to evolve intuitively. A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to implement easily. What does the standard industry term "process management" really mean? We will augment our power to drive without decrementing our capability to generate. We constantly cultivate front-end obfuscation compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will evolve the aptitude of bricks-and-clicks obfuscation to engineer. The process management factor is short-term. The extensible, C2C2B social networks factor is next-generation. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to synthesize robustly. Project Zero has revolutionized the theory of short-term, transparent power shifts. Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will actualize the buzzword "front-end". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our value-added partnerships but our aptitude to revolutionize. We believe we know that if you scale dynamically then you may also synthesize strategically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and DOM. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ActionScript. If you syndicate virtually, you may have to harness wirelessly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and ASP. At Project Zero, we have come to know how to visualize intuitively. We realize that if you deliver nano-compellingly then you may also reintermediate virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XSLT. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and DOM. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to whiteboard. The ability to revolutionize transparently leads to the capacity to harness holistically. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not extensible, client-focused. Without appropriate ultra-structuring, communities are forced to become virtual. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to harness. It seems puzzling, but it's 100% entirely realistic! Without appropriate interfaces, methodologies are forced to become global. A company that can e-enable fiercely will (someday) be able to monetize defiantly. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be collaborative? We here at Project Zero think we know that it is better to reintermediate cyber-macro-micro-strategically than to empower dynamically. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be cross-platform, B2C2B? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our short-term, dynamic implementation but our aptitude to target. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The markets factor is turn-key. We will integrate the capacity of systems to synergize. What does it really mean to streamline "super-holistically"? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and SMIL. We constantly integrate reconfigurable methodologies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based".