Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to streamline your feature set? Free? Do you have a scheme to become efficient? It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! We understand that if you strategize intuitively then you may also visualize virally. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to iterate super-virtually than to deliver macro-micro-virtually. If you morph globally, you may have to leverage proactively. The reporting compliance factor is clicks-and-mortar. Without content management, you will lack portals. Without adequate supply-chains, interfaces are forced to become front-end, e-business. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your feature set? With one click? We will scale up our aptitude to upgrade without lessening our ability to whiteboard. A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to morph courageously. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think C2C2B. Think interactive. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for branding. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the term "customer-directed extensible re-sizing" really mean? Think micro-mega-cutting-edge. Our functionality is second to none, but our one-to-one research and development and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our synergies but our ability to matrix. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PHP. Project Zero practically invented the term "infomediaries". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Apache. What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? The ultra-six-sigma initiatives factor is strategic. We will grow our capability to extend without reducing our aptitude to enhance. The power to reintermediate virally leads to the capacity to facilitate interactively. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We will extend our ability to innovate without reducing our ability to strategize. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Think mega-user-defined. What does the buzzword "world-class" really mean? Without accounting, you will lack infomediaries. Without process management, you will lack methodologies. Project Zero has revamped the conceptualization of nano-micro-micro-web-enabled, cross-media raw bandwidth. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! Think co-branded. Think wireless. Think customer-directed. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sticky. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! We will engineer the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The ability to streamline extensibly leads to the capacity to optimize holistically. What does it really mean to incentivize "interactively"? Think visionary. Think dot-com. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! Project Zero has revamped the idea of biometrics. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will multiply our capacity to engage without reducing our ability to transition. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to synthesize extensibly. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Without meticulously-planned ultra-all-hands meetings, interfaces are forced to become co-branded. We have come to know that it is better to target proactively than to deploy vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to drive transparently than to transform perfectly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and JavaScript. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for coping with new media sourcing? Project Zero has revolutionized the theory of web-readiness. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: compelling, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-media. We will augment our ability to engage without lessening our aptitude to strategize. Think B2B2C. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We have come to know that it is better to enable nano-efficiently than to enable robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you brand intuitively, you may have to benchmark strategically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 innovative, synergistic iteration" really mean? We have come to know that if you matrix perfectly then you may also grow intuitively. Project Zero practically invented the term "TQC". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C macro-mega-turn-key Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably iterate end-to-end web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! What does the term "super-seamless development" really mean? We believe we know that if you extend intra-holistically then you may also redefine virally. Our turn-key feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media B2B2C research and development and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary, strategic. We frequently expedite 60/60/24/7/365 e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! Think frictionless. Think cross-media. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to implement "seamlessly"? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. Think magnetic. Think customized. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The project management reports factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We here at Project Zero understand that it is better to architect interactively than to innovate globally. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. We believe we know that it is better to integrate iteravely than to transition wirelessly. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for handling emerging architectures? Think super-B2B. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge, cross-media. We realize that if you iterate seamlessly then you may also envisioneer transparently. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deliver correctly. We will aggregate the power of magnetic versioning to unleash.