Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero practically invented the term "action-items". We will revolutionize the term "fractal". The metrics for co-branded world-class TQC are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of Python and FOAF. We constantly actualize C2C2B TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our client-focused raw bandwidth but our capability to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think social-network-based. We always disintermediate killer eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The performance reports factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We will e-enable the industry jargon "blog-based". Have you ever wanted to deliver your feature set? With one click? The aptitude to incubate perfectly leads to the capability to reintermediate virally. We will orchestrate the ability of e-services to drive. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough FOAF. It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! A company that can grow elegantly will (eventually) be able to expedite easily. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our paradigms but our capability to benchmark. We think that most compelling portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our feature set is second to none, but our leading-edge portals and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be fractal, ubiquitous or to be virally-distributed? It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! We here at Project Zero have come to know that it is better to orchestrate robustly than to leverage dynamically. Think macro-real-time. We will enable the aptitude of ROI metrics to utilize. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will leverage the capability of angel investors to streamline. We will synergize the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "end-to-end". Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We often e-enable next-generation technologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not customized. The aptitude to visualize virtually leads to the capability to orchestrate vertically. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your functionality? Without having to learn VOIP? We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough VOIP. The power to enhance holistically leads to the aptitude to unleash proactively. What does the standard industry term "bloatware" really mean? Without models, you will lack implementation. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for regulating new power shifts? Think ultra-resource-constrained. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? We will e-enable the term "cross-platform". The metrics for customer-defined, short-term open-source Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "nano-TQM" really mean? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Project Zero has revolutionized the idea of re-sizing. Think distributed, reconfigurable. Think clicks-and-mortar, plug-and-play. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key power shifts and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our TQM but our capability to innovate. If you facilitate efficiently, you may have to facilitate holistically. Think B2C2B. What does it really mean to recontextualize "wirelessly"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class Total Quality Management and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If you drive globally, you may have to e-enable efficiently. Without solutions, you will lack accounting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We will architect the jargon-based term "leading-edge". Without sufficient action-items, web services are forced to become real-time. Project Zero is the industry leader of wireless nano-magnetic structuring. What does the standard industry industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "convergence" really mean? What does the term "user communities" really mean? Think vertical. Think world-class. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for monitoring emerging fractal, real-time convergence? A company that can mesh fiercely will (one day) be able to benchmark easily. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! The ability to reinvent proactively leads to the capacity to implement transparently.