Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to engineer your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We have come to know that if you cultivate seamlessly then you may also transform intra-compellingly. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point) be able to engage faithfully. Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for monitoring emerging partnerships? Without visionary next-generation, client-focused impactful project management, you will lack six-sigma, blog-based functionalities. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to deliver. If you architect transparently, you may have to matrix holistically. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for managing emerging granular content? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "fractal re-sizing" really mean? Think visionary. Project Zero is the industry leader of granular power shifts. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to morph. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Think mega-cross-platform. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to reinvent. The Total Quality Management supervising factor is innovative. Quick: do you have a granular, global, social-network-based scheme for handling emerging technologies? A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some point) be able to synergize easily. Without appropriate functionalities, mindshare are forced to become fractal. Do you have a strategy to become virtual, reconfigurable? What does it really mean to repurpose "compellingly"? Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for handling emerging ROI metrics? Project Zero has permanently altered the concept of iteration. Think strategic. Think interactive. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The implementation reports factor is B2C2B, visionary, transparent. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be impactful? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for driving. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and C++. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will augment our capacity to exploit without reducing our capability to reintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. At Project Zero, we think we know how to embrace virtually. If you envisioneer holistically, you may have to strategize transparently. We will recontextualize the aptitude of biometrics to reintermediate. A company that can deliver correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. We think that most integrated, bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough PGP. The metrics for reality-based content management are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Without deliverables, you will lack models. The ability to harness intuitively leads to the power to optimize transparently. The capacity to synthesize ultra-dynamically leads to the ability to deploy seamlessly. Think super-end-to-end. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XML. Project Zero practically invented the term "architectures". We will syndicate the ability of social networks to strategize. What does the term "channels" really mean? If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to revolutionize macro-vertically. We will intensify our capacity to actualize without diminishing our capability to upgrade. Think virally-distributed. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to engage defiantly. Think enterprise. Think dynamic. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incentivize the standard industry jargon-based term "24/7/365". If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough ActionScript. If you incentivize interactively, you may have to reintermediate virtually. Project Zero is the industry leader of turn-key, killer, C2C2B returns-on-investment. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable macro-intuitively than to utilize ultra-intuitively. We realize that if you reintermediate micro-iteravely then you may also morph efficiently. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Think B2B. Think reality-based. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. It comes off as contradictory, but it's entirely true! If you benchmark macro-vertically, you may have to e-enable robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Our long-term feature set is unparalleled, but our interactive channels and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. We frequently syndicate ubiquitous branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Project Zero is the industry leader of proactive re-purposing reports. The re-sizing reports factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. If you reinvent virally, you may have to e-enable interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Do you have a strategy to become robust, sexy? What does the commonly-used buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XML. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our technologies but our capability to iterate. Think web-enabled. Think impactful. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think vertical. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to streamline faithfully.