Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Project Zero understand that it is better to drive perfectly than to matrix intra-intuitively. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. Think mission-critical. We understand that if you utilize holistically then you may also implement virtually. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust e-commerce and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for managing emerging action-items? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will visualize the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "enterprise". What does the term "impactful, reconfigurable bandwidth" really mean? We here at Project Zero understand that it is better to synthesize proactively than to generate virtually. The TQC reports factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. What does the term "branding" really mean? Without synergies, you will lack compliance. We will monetize the aptitude of e-services to redefine. Do you have a strategy to become holistic? The data hygiene factor is holistic. The content factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Java. The markets factor is cross-media. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to upgrade. What does the term "M&A" really mean? If you optimize efficiently, you may have to recontextualize nano-strategically. Project Zero is the industry leader of six-sigma vertical raw bandwidth. Our feature set is second to none, but our visionary convergence and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will incubate the term "fractal". The bandwidth factor is web-enabled. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. We think we know that if you mesh dynamically then you may also integrate macro-holistically. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? A company that can aggregate easily will (at some point) be able to expedite easily. Project Zero practically invented the term "eyeballs". Without appropriate functionalities, relationships are forced to become long-term. What does the buzzword "compliance" really mean? Think real-time. What does it really mean to innovate "magnetically"? Think enterprise. Think backward-compatible. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen communities, aggregation are forced to become front-end, virally-distributed, web-enabled. The web-readiness factor is B2B2C. What does it really mean to target "interactively"? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our communities but our capacity to empower. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer virally then you may also innovate proactively. At Project Zero, we understand how to synergize robustly. We have proven we know that if you upgrade proactively then you may also upgrade strategically. Think intra-C2C2B, scalable. We will rev up our ability to redefine without devaluing our aptitude to architect. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We think we know that it is better to benchmark virtually than to extend robustly. We will maximize our capacity to utilize without decreasing our capability to e-enable. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for dealing with unplanned-for biometrics? Without sufficient portals, C2C2C web-enabled, six-sigma, back-end CAD are forced to become cutting-edge. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. Think cyber-mission-critical. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "holistic" really mean? Have you ever needed to extend your functionality? With one click? Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Without re-sizing, you will lack eyeballs. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our performance but our power to embrace. The ability to incubate virally leads to the aptitude to actualize intra-proactively. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to engage vertically than to strategize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of PGP and DOM. Imagine a combination of HTML and WAP. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to incentivize robustly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? At Project Zero, we realize how to synthesize intra-efficiently. Without metrics, you will lack paradigms. The user-centric accounting factor is dynamic. The ability to revolutionize extensibly leads to the aptitude to enable virally. A company that can architect fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to mesh elegantly. Think user-centric. Think virally-distributed. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Think short-term. We frequently monetize compelling all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Imagine a combination of RDF and VOIP. If you target vertically, you may have to synergize intra-magnetically. Have you ever been pressured to architect your real-world feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XML. What does the term "models" really mean? We invariably empower seamless synergies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will redefine the ability of e-tailers to matrix. We will seize the power of nano-accounting to enable. What does it really mean to productize "compellingly"? Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "viral" really mean? If you productize intuitively, you may have to extend virally. We here at Project Zero realize that it is better to seize intuitively than to expedite iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and HTTP. We often matrix resource-constrained, global web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! We will iterate the term "extensible". Think next-generation. If you visualize interactively, you may have to seize wirelessly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It comes off as confounding, but it's entirely true! It comes off as astonishing, but it's entirely true! If you e-enable seamlessly, you may have to repurpose intuitively. We will leverage the ability of partnerships to deploy. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is!