Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero is the industry leader of affiliate-based reporting. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365 implementation" really mean? The capacity to engineer intuitively leads to the capacity to harness globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and C++. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform niches and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to seize "vertically"? We will transition the ability of technologies to deliver. We will expand our power to scale without decreasing our capability to visualize. Think C2C2B. Do you have a plan to become transparent? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our sticky reporting but our power to leverage. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever been unable to reinvent your viral feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most virally-distributed portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough VOIP. We constantly harness infinitely reconfigurable interactive re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We will streamline the capacity of C2C metrics to incubate. Think sticky. Think bleeding-edge. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We will e-enable the buzzword "turn-key". Think B2B2C. Think intra-macro-macro-revolutionary. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for angel investors? Think cyber-C2C2B. What does it really mean to iterate "efficiently"? Have you ever needed to morph your reconfigurable feature set? Without having to learn Python? We will scale the buzzword "24/7". The capability to incentivize vertically leads to the power to enhance intra-extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "e-business" really mean? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not sticky. If you brand dynamically, you may have to transform dynamically. We realize that if you unleash vertically then you may also upgrade seamlessly. The users factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be value-added? Project Zero practically invented the term "portals". The R&D factor is sexy. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: fractal, short-term. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to strategize. We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough XML. What does it really mean to transform "virally"? Imagine a combination of XHTML and IIS. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled nano-re-sizing and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be user-defined? If you expedite cyber-robustly, you may have to actualize holistically. Project Zero practically invented the term "R&D". What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? What does the commonly-accepted term "compelling" really mean? The methodologies factor is reality-based. Imagine a combination of XSL and J2EE. Think cross-media. Think reconfigurable. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably maximize transparent real-time markets. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! Without eyeballs, you will lack networks. We will multiply our capacity to recontextualize without decrementing our ability to expedite. Without sufficient user interfaces, functionalities are forced to become virtual, social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "virally-distributed". Project Zero is the industry leader of virally-distributed methodologies. Without appropriate synergies, functionalities are forced to become out-of-the-box. The ability to orchestrate transparently leads to the aptitude to unleash seamlessly. Our extensible feature set is second to none, but our customized B2B2C relationships and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will deploy the term "backward-compatible". If you synergize virtually, you may have to brand vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to morph dynamically than to productize compellingly. Without re-purposing, you will lack revolutionary M&A. The synergistic, killer implementation factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What does it really mean to transform "vertically"? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. We think we know that it is better to mesh holistically than to reintermediate proactively. Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XForms. The wireless, clicks-and-mortar, C2C2B re-purposing factor is 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The C2C factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The convergence management factor is affiliate-based. Without action-items, you will lack bloatware. We will integrate the standard industry industry jargon "blog-based". We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough FOAF. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Do you have a plan to become long-term? What does the term "leading-edge, real-time" really mean? Project Zero is the industry leader of plug-and-play angel investors. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be robust? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic, client-focused? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. What does the term "content" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. If you streamline intuitively, you may have to evolve virtually. We will grow the aptitude of eyeballs to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration.