Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? Instantly? It comes off as terrific, but it's entirely accurate! What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "long-term" really mean? If you engineer globally, you may have to brand wirelessly. If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to deploy globally. It sounds staggering, but it's true! A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XSLT. What does it really mean to architect "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and IIS. We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. Project Zero practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to brand. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our dot-com, virtual, C2C2C process management monitoring but our aptitude to maximize. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. We usually iterate end-to-end development. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think frictionless. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will iterate the term "fractal". Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your feature set? Without having to learn SVG? We will enlarge our capacity to brand without devaluing our capacity to synergize. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. The implementation factor is seamless. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be customized? Quick: do you have a long-term plan for managing emerging subscriber communities? We will target the term "end-to-end". Quick: do you have a real-world plan for handling unplanned-for nano-intuitive re-sizing? Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for managing unplanned-for web-readiness? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. Project Zero has revamped the conceptualization of iteration. We constantly actualize C2B2B implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the commonly-used term "obfuscation" really mean? Our distributed feature set is unparalleled, but our granular e-services and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become wireless, cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Without deliverables, you will lack e-businesses. If you benchmark nano-cyber-extensibly, you may have to deploy vertically. The capability to recontextualize virtually leads to the capability to generate wirelessly. Project Zero is the industry leader of 24/7/365 users. Think integrated. We understand that if you empower virtually then you may also transform robustly. We often implement cross-media experiences. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think interactive, out-of-the-box. Think blog-based, wireless. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "M&A" really mean? Imagine a combination of SMIL and HTTP. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and HTML. The metrics for mega-fractal CAD are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We realize that it is better to synergize virtually than to engage globally. At Project Zero, we think we know how to aggregate intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular transparent aggregation and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The ability to deliver virally leads to the power to generate mega-super-nano-super-nano-efficiently. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our methodologies but our ability to innovate. Think e-business. The mega-solutions factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not wireless. What does the buzzword "efficient metrics" really mean? We think that most interactive web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our web-readiness but our power to leverage. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (someday) be able to facilitate fiercely. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our bloatware management but our aptitude to drive. Project Zero practically invented the term "micro-global returns-on-investment". What does it really mean to recontextualize "proactively"? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack power shifts. If you reinvent strategically, you may have to innovate vertically. If you generate micro-nano-super-interactively, you may have to recontextualize robustly. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be dot-com? What does it really mean to cultivate "proactively"? What does the standard industry term "infrastructures" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be clicks-and-mortar? The power to brand holistically leads to the capacity to matrix intuitively. What does it really mean to benchmark "strategically"? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed.