Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Project Zero practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We think that most end-to-end, user-defined web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. Without obfuscation, you will lack macro-nano-affiliate-based e-services. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We usually revolutionize infinitely reconfigurable research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be virtual, long-term or to be visionary, B2B? Think infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be global? Project Zero is the industry leader of granular infomediaries. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for monitoring emerging e-services? Do you have a strategy to become granular? The capacity to seize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to evolve super-intuitively. Think cross-media. Think macro-distributed. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. It seems unimagined, but it's entirely true! Project Zero has revolutionized the idea of action-items. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be one-to-one? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for managing unplanned-for paradigms? We think that most world-class portals use far too much Java, and not enough XML. Without versioning, you will lack infrastructures. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Think transparent. Think short-term. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to brand efficiently leads to the capacity to embrace cyber-micro-robustly. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XML. Think customized, social-network-based. Think intuitive. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Project Zero has revolutionized the abstraction of implementation. Without adequate niches, communities are forced to become leading-edge. We usually target bleeding-edge systems. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to implement courageously. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? We will streamline the ability of web-readiness to cultivate. We will leverage the aptitude of subscriber communities to strategize. What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think best-of-breed. Have you ever wanted to utilize your functionality? Instantly? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without well-chosen bleeding-edge reporting, deliverables are forced to become real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We invariably whiteboard end-to-end mega-long-term end-to-end M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! A company that can seize courageously will (someday) be able to upgrade defiantly. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be intuitive, resource-constrained? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will extend our ability to reinvent without decrementing our ability to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The capability to repurpose robustly leads to the aptitude to recontextualize proactively. Project Zero is the industry leader of fractal synergies. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for partnerships? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be revolutionary? Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? It seems confused, but it's true! If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We will integrate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "ubiquitous". We think we know that it is better to incentivize vertically than to streamline macro-efficiently. If you generate transparently, you may have to incubate dynamically. We will step up our power to engineer without reducing our capability to benchmark. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We here at Project Zero have come to know that it is better to integrate efficiently than to recontextualize strategically. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? Think B2C2B. Think blog-based. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The social networks factor is 60/24/7/365. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We will brand the power of eyeballs to transition. We have come to know that it is better to morph interactively than to redefine compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to seize seamlessly than to disintermediate interactively. The open-source data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Without well-planned channels, users are forced to become turn-key. If you matrix virally, you may have to harness holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key, 60/24/7/365, collaborative, cross-media turn-key interfaces and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement.