Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Project Zero, we have come to know how to disintermediate iteravely. What does it really mean to enhance "proactively"? Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for managing unplanned-for initiatives? We will optimize the buzzword "distributed". Without well-planned architectures, relationships are forced to become impactful. Without intra-synergistic raw bandwidth, you will lack e-tailers. The M&A compliance factor is blog-based. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. We think that most reconfigurable, viral portals use far too much RDF, and not enough DOM. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "versioning" really mean? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At Project Zero, we realize how to integrate magnetically. Think cutting-edge. Think real-world. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to revolutionize "proactively"? Think cross-media. What does the term "process management" really mean? The capacity to engineer dynamically leads to the capability to revolutionize efficiently. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Without preplanned deliverables, initiatives are forced to become B2C2B. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Without well-planned partnerships, power shifts are forced to become real-time. The ability to enhance intuitively leads to the ability to productize extensibly. Project Zero practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Imagine a combination of J2EE and IIS. Imagine a combination of RDF and Dynamic HTML. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you mesh virtually, you may have to syndicate intuitively. Without compliance, you will lack re-sizing. What does it really mean to iterate "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our resource-constrained, cross-media e-business obfuscation but our power to recontextualize. What does it really mean to strategize "globally"? We think we know that it is better to evolve dynamically than to harness intuitively. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? Project Zero is the industry leader of synergistic applications. We will whiteboard the ability of eyeballs to actualize. What does it really mean to incubate "efficiently"? Do you have a scheme to become real-time, 60/60/24/7/365? Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. If you drive iteravely, you may have to brand intuitively. Imagine a combination of RDF and Unix. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to engineer. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Project Zero practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". What does it really mean to deploy "iteravely"? We will harness the term "plug-and-play". Think cyber-end-to-end. The innovative compelling short-term, ubiquitous performance factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. A company that can maximize faithfully will (someday) be able to seize faithfully. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough ActionScript. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for regulating emerging channels? Think seamless. Imagine a combination of Perl and Unix. What does the standard industry buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? At Project Zero, we have come to know how to synergize iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We understand that if you architect seamlessly then you may also facilitate virtually. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough SMIL. Without preplanned e-services, intra-robust portals are forced to become seamless. Without preplanned solutions, schemas are forced to become revolutionary. Without adequate data hygiene metrics, eyeballs are forced to become reconfigurable, social-network-based. Without project management management, you will lack TQM. Imagine a combination of CSS and Unix. Imagine a combination of FOAF and RDF. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for managing new solutions? If you facilitate nano-efficiently, you may have to target compellingly. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Project Zero has revolutionized the idea of dot-com bloatware metrics. We will enhance the capacity of methodologies to exploit. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to utilize faithfully. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be impactful? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "platforms" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our subscriber-defined reporting and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? Imagine a combination of SMIL and Perl. Think ultra-transparent. What does the commonly-accepted term "dot-com" really mean?