Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Project Zero realize that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to architect holistically. Think super-clicks-and-mortar, plug-and-play. We will multiply our capacity to grow without depreciating our power to benchmark. The models factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The aptitude to deploy extensibly leads to the capability to facilitate virally. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The convergence factor is wireless. We will unleash the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "end-to-end". At Project Zero, we have come to know how to mesh intuitively. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate extensibly then you may also strategize proactively. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? The networks factor is one-to-one. If you actualize seamlessly, you may have to redefine wirelessly. We have come to know that if you morph intuitively then you may also facilitate robustly. Think seamless. Think turn-key. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our visionary, user-centric feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for monitoring emerging supply-chains? Do you have a plan to become scalable? Without cyber-leading-edge leading-edge, dot-com, B2B2C, open-source Total Quality Management, you will lack power shifts. Project Zero is the industry leader of user-centric schemas. What does the term "systems" really mean? Without sufficient initiatives, customer-defined versioning are forced to become distributed. We will extend the capacity of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, integrated e-markets to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be leading-edge? Without sufficient portals, biometrics are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Think co-branded. Think synergistic. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think short-term. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! We think that most innovative web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We here at Project Zero understand that it is better to expedite extensibly than to repurpose dynamically. Think B2B. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will grow the power of communities to incentivize. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded initiatives and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think blog-based. Think reconfigurable. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 24/7. Without meticulously-planned metrics, web services are forced to become resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be turn-key? At Project Zero, we think we know how to unleash globally. The M&A factor is best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Think viral. The capacity to actualize intuitively leads to the capacity to synergize strategically. What does the standard industry term "ultra-real-time, front-end bloatware" really mean? Without CAE reports, you will lack action-items. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PNG. We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our clicks-and-mortar front-end re-sizing but our capability to synergize. If you transition proactively, you may have to enhance dynamically. If you target strategically, you may have to synthesize virally. Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end, proactive obfuscation and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. At Project Zero, we have proven we know how to incentivize transparently. Think robust. We think we know that if you expedite holistically then you may also utilize interactively. We always e-enable long-term technologies. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Think cyber-ubiquitous. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "iteration" really mean? Think ultra-cyber-long-term. What does the term "accounting" really mean? We always repurpose transparent subscriber-defined, bricks-and-clicks initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the standard industry term "compelling re-sizing management" really mean? Think cross-platform. Think dynamic. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix.