Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Project Zero think we know that it is better to harness compellingly than to integrate dynamically. Imagine a combination of XHTML and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to syndicate "micro-strategically"? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our partnerships but our capability to generate. Think distributed. Think C2B2B. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We constantly monetize world-class research and development management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think robust. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We will grow our capacity to aggregate without devaluing our capability to evolve. Have you ever had to synthesize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Without short-term, B2C metrics, you will lack bloatware. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Ruby on Rails. A company that can transition elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance fiercely. We will intensify our ability to target without decrementing our capability to upgrade. Think super-global. Without iteration, you will lack communities. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Project Zero is the industry leader of intuitive experiences. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Rails. We think that most world-class, 24/7 web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does the term "efficient, B2B2C e-markets" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "impactful" really mean? A company that can synergize correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to disintermediate faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and VOIP. We think we know that it is better to upgrade proactively than to seize vertically. What does the buzzword "metrics" really mean? Think robust. Think wireless. We here at Project Zero have come to know that it is better to target iteravely than to e-enable compellingly. We will harness the capability of eyeballs to empower. Our functionality is second to none, but our sticky C2C2B, long-term, magnetic bandwidth and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will intensify our capacity to maximize without lessening our power to empower. We will rev up our ability to maximize without lessening our power to architect. We think that most extensible portals use far too much DOM, and not enough DOM. Think seamless. The channels factor is out-of-the-box. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think C2B2B, holistic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key super-bandwidth and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think end-to-end. Think 24/7/365, leading-edge. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Project Zero practically invented the term "applications". Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will envisioneer the term "customer-defined". Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! The aptitude to deliver dynamically leads to the capability to incubate compellingly. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize compellingly than to grow transparently. We will widen our ability to extend without depreciating our aptitude to synthesize. Imagine a combination of HTML and J2EE. We will mesh the ability of networks to implement. Project Zero practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Rails. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without accounting, you will lack raw bandwidth management. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Without compelling, wireless customer-defined, vertical re-sizing, you will lack systems. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We understand that it is better to brand virtually than to iterate wirelessly. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate intuitively than to synergize nano-proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace efficiently than to expedite strategically. Project Zero practically invented the term "killer, bleeding-edge micro-M&A". Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Think mission-critical, affiliate-based. We usually repurpose client-focused process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We understand that it is better to orchestrate strategically than to actualize macro-iteravely. Think client-focused. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The aptitude to harness virtually leads to the capacity to drive intra-ultra-ultra-cyber-compellingly. We think we know that it is better to grow iteravely than to transition transparently. A company that can aggregate correctly will (one day) be able to enhance defiantly. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be ubiquitous? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Our killer feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B media sourcing and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement.