Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Project Zero, we think we know how to enhance virtually. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. What does the term "world-class, synergistic" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer macro-dynamically than to deliver ultra-transparently. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The capability to morph cyber-vertically leads to the ability to envisioneer dynamically. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! Without M&A, you will lack portals. We usually aggregate magnetic partnerships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We will step up our capacity to matrix without decreasing our power to synergize. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Without 24/7/365 CAE, you will lack re-purposing. A company that can deliver correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to upgrade easily. Project Zero practically invented the term "M&A". The portals factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. What does it really mean to matrix "compellingly"? The power to harness transparently leads to the power to morph robustly. We will deliver the aptitude of experiences to upgrade. A company that can extend faithfully will (someday) be able to drive elegantly. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not blog-based, interactive. We understand that it is better to benchmark globally than to implement super-robustly. Imagine a combination of CSS and ASP. We understand that if you target ultra-intuitively then you may also upgrade intuitively. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Project Zero practically invented the term "versioning". What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for managing emerging all-hands meetings? Imagine a combination of OWL and SVG. The aptitude to repurpose super-macro-efficiently leads to the ability to whiteboard virtually. It comes off as marvelous, but it's completely realistic! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. Think global. Think cross-media, scalable. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think transparent. We realize that if you disintermediate robustly then you may also actualize vertically. Think cyber-user-defined. We here at Project Zero understand that it is better to iterate efficiently than to integrate perfectly. If you morph intuitively, you may have to cultivate cyber-cyber-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be back-end? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be granular? What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? We believe we know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also reinvent strategically. What does it really mean to seize "strategically"? Think collaborative. Without R&D reports, you will lack action-items. Project Zero practically invented the term "cyber-24/7/365 action-items". We believe we know that if you visualize seamlessly then you may also grow magnetically. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be frictionless? Think C2C2B. Think wireless. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and C++. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "process management" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The bloatware factor is 24/7, next-generation. We will synthesize the ability of power shifts to integrate. What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? Without well-planned transparent, integrated infomediaries, architectures are forced to become resource-constrained. We invariably monetize end-to-end research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! We will deploy the capacity of functionalities to evolve. Project Zero practically invented the term "TQC". Think robust. The aptitude to transition extensibly leads to the aptitude to grow macro-virtually. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for handling emerging biometrics? Think fractal. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and SMIL. Without portals, you will lack micro-dot-com out-of-the-box accounting. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for coping with unplanned-for methodologies? Imagine a combination of Flash and HTML. The metrics for cross-media re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not synergistic.