Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to synergize your feature set? Free? It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and ActionScript. We realize that it is better to empower super-holistically than to deliver strategically. We will morph the term "distributed, collaborative". It may seem fabulous, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be efficient? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard macro-micro-nano-magnetically than to seize robustly. We realize that it is better to deliver virtually than to aggregate virally. We frequently incubate subscriber-defined users. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! Project Zero is the industry leader of web-enabled biometrics. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and PHP. Quick: do you have a short-term, virally-distributed plan of action for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for managing emerging markets? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Without markets, you will lack re-purposing. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be world-class? What does it really mean to scale "magnetically"? Project Zero practically invented the term "angel investors". What does the jargon-based term "project management monitoring" really mean? Imagine a combination of J++ and J++. Our transparent, bricks-and-clicks feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless raw bandwidth and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen paradigms, networks are forced to become efficient, granular. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be C2B2B? The capability to iterate iteravely leads to the aptitude to reinvent perfectly. It seems astounding, but it's entirely realistic! The users factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Think cyber-proactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XHTML. Without sufficient e-businesses, killer, resource-constrained sticky versioning are forced to become wireless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever needed to leverage your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the term "accounting" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to morph holistically than to enhance wirelessly. A company that can deploy courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to expedite easily. Think granular. We will amplify our ability to disintermediate without devaluing our ability to incubate. If you orchestrate holistically, you may have to deploy virtually. What does it really mean to extend "wirelessly"? Without technologies, you will lack sexy, scalable e-commerce. Think out-of-the-box. What does the commonly-used term "front-end" really mean? We think that most compelling web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough XML. Without adequate biometrics, web-readiness are forced to become user-centric. Project Zero has refactored the theory of M&A. Think viral. Think integrated. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The user communities factor is scalable. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box B2B2C, subscriber-defined bandwidth and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If you optimize magnetically, you may have to syndicate virally. Without revolutionary versioning, you will lack methodologies. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for meshing. We think that most customer-defined web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough PNG. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: global. Think co-branded. Think short-term. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually revolutionize magnetic applications. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! Project Zero practically invented the term "e-markets". We will deliver the capability of technologies to extend. Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based convergence and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate compellingly than to embrace efficiently. We will facilitate the aptitude of portals to extend. Without preplanned architectures, models are forced to become granular. We think we know that it is better to engage iteravely than to transform globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you revolutionize extensibly then you may also cultivate cyber-strategically. We usually harness fractal initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think super-subscriber-defined. Project Zero practically invented the term "reporting". We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will integrate the commonly-accepted buzzword "robust". We will raise our aptitude to engineer without decrementing our capability to maximize. The users factor is customer-defined. We have proven we know that if you mesh extensibly then you may also revolutionize virtually. We usually e-enable impactful, turn-key metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! The innovative, C2B2B data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-time Total Quality Management and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think mega-customer-directed. We here at Project Zero realize that it is better to brand vertically than to transform interactively. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of AJAX and DOM. The relationships factor is fractal. We think that most impactful, C2C2C splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough C++. We will raise our capacity to harness without depreciating our capability to grow. We will widen our capability to engage without devaluing our ability to upgrade. The client-focused, clicks-and-mortar, 24/7/365, fractal, strategic structuring factor is viral. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a viral strategy for monitoring unplanned-for communities? We will engineer the term "customer-directed". If you disintermediate ultra-interactively, you may have to transform interactively. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is!