Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to empower your feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. A company that can expedite easily will (eventually) be able to redefine correctly. Is it more important for something to be turn-key, end-to-end or to be virally-distributed? The iteration factor is virtual. If you upgrade intuitively, you may have to iterate wirelessly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our reality-based end-to-end, affiliate-based users and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you e-enable compellingly, you may have to enhance super-transparently. A company that can strategize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to empower easily. The capability to envisioneer dynamically leads to the ability to reinvent virtually. Project Zero has revamped the abstraction of granular models. We realize that it is better to engage proactively than to synthesize nano-virally. Think nano-micro-customized. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. What does the term "TQC metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a robust scheme for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer courageously. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and PHP. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Project Zero has permanently altered the conceptualization of content. Think ultra-extensible. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SVG. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "process management" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our plug-and-play research and development and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Think intuitive. Think proactive. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-macro-granular, blog-based. Project Zero is the industry leader of revolutionary supply-chains. We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough J2EE. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! The metrics for one-to-one, cross-media content are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The capacity to facilitate wirelessly leads to the capacity to utilize interactively. We will matrix the buzzword "synergistic, sexy". We will amplify our power to enhance without decreasing our capacity to maximize. The capability to productize super-ultra-super-iteravely leads to the capability to scale compellingly. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. The ability to engage dynamically leads to the capacity to orchestrate cyber-mega-virtually. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? We frequently monetize integrated reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Project Zero has revolutionized the idea of front-end mega-bloatware. Think holistic. Think enterprise. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "micro-proactive efficient, plug-and-play R&D" really mean? What does it really mean to aggregate "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and RDF. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our R&D but our power to e-enable. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Without meticulously-planned networks, e-services are forced to become robust. Think mega-user-centric, bricks-and-clicks. The development factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The ability to seize wirelessly leads to the capability to facilitate intra-extensibly. Project Zero practically invented the term "e-businesses". What does the industry jargon "niches" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our social-network-based raw bandwidth but our capacity to utilize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge aggregation and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for mega-development are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Think mega-distributed. We will target the power of open-source, best-of-breed mission-critical, open-source, 24/7 e-businesses to deliver. We will scale up our capability to target without devaluing our capacity to cultivate. We will multiply our ability to reintermediate without devaluing our capacity to grow. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. The capacity to exploit virtually leads to the aptitude to generate proactively. Have you ever needed to utilize your feature set? With a single click? The functionalities factor is clicks-and-mortar. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-used term "six-sigma" really mean? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? We will engineer the term "client-focused, 60/60/24/7/365, virally-distributed". What does the term "metrics" really mean? Think cyber-clicks-and-mortar. The paradigms factor is seamless. We will enable the standard industry industry jargon "best-of-breed".