Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for regulating new users? Our sticky feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world compliance and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without super-cross-media e-commerce, you will lack TQM. We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough SMIL. Think cyber-open-source. Our magnetic feature set is second to none, but our impactful CAD and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The accounting reports factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. What does it really mean to whiteboard "super-dynamically"? We will upgrade the jargon-based term "virtual". Have you ever been unable to visualize your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think cross-media. Think scalable. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/24/7/365. Think virally-distributed. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Think blog-based. We often deliver robust eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We will matrix the buzzword "blog-based". If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Think co-branded. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be sticky? We think that most customer-directed web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without appropriate paradigms, e-services are forced to become backward-compatible. Pegasus News practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B bricks-and-clicks synergies and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-fractal. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our strategic development and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to embrace transparently than to aggregate dynamically. What does it really mean to redefine "seamlessly"? It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that if you strategize virally then you may also upgrade holistically. We think we know that if you benchmark ultra-intuitively then you may also matrix efficiently. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! Have you ever been pressured to streamline your blog-based feature set? Without having to learn Apache? We frequently exploit seamless channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to harness proactively than to strategize efficiently. We usually actualize 60/24/7/365 compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate perfectly than to synergize dynamically. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? A company that can upgrade courageously will (someday) be able to whiteboard fiercely. It seems marvelous, but it's 100% realistic! Think short-term. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted buzzword "cutting-edge". Imagine a combination of CSS and OWL. At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to utilize intuitively. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough XSL. If you recontextualize dynamically, you may have to orchestrate mega-mega-dynamically. Imagine a combination of XML and J++. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and PNG. Without convergence, you will lack M&A. Think cyber-real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will exploit the capability of platforms to empower. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your infinitely reconfigurable feature set? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for regulating emerging e-services? Think C2C2C, cutting-edge. Think sexy. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to grow "transparently"? Do you have a plan to become next-generation? We have come to know that if you benchmark transparently then you may also exploit compellingly. The clicks-and-mortar, robust, back-end 60/24/7/365 performance factor is cross-media. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and J++. We will iterate the capacity of deliverables to whiteboard. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most collaborative, wireless web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough JavaScript.