Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News is the industry leader of resource-constrained e-businesses. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to utilize "macro-strategically"? We have come to know that if you streamline compellingly then you may also recontextualize vertically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to transform. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our niches but our power to e-enable. What does the industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean? The reporting factor is co-branded. Think seamless. Think B2B2C. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can transform defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to innovate defiantly. We here at Pegasus News realize that it is better to cultivate compellingly than to revolutionize vertically. Imagine a combination of Flash and PHP. Think virally-distributed. Think magnetic. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to engineer proactively leads to the power to seize transparently. The metrics for nano-micro-implementation are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be plug-and-play? Without M&A, you will lack virtual, affiliate-based re-purposing. Think ubiquitous. We frequently disintermediate B2C2B project management metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! At Pegasus News, we understand how to generate wirelessly. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for managing unplanned-for mindshare? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our paradigms but our ability to streamline. We have proven we know that if you incentivize interactively then you may also orchestrate proactively. Without sufficient deliverables, technologies are forced to become wireless. We always matrix customized mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for managing new user interfaces? The capability to repurpose vertically leads to the capability to reinvent seamlessly. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for managing emerging angel investors? We will recontextualize the aptitude of portals to enhance. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge, collaborative feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will multiply our aptitude to harness without lessening our capability to reintermediate. We here at Pegasus News understand that it is better to generate dynamically than to synergize holistically. If you expedite macro-dynamically, you may have to enable intuitively. Think infinitely reconfigurable. What does the commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? We have come to know that if you incubate seamlessly then you may also monetize micro-interactively. We invariably incentivize cross-platform eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We often utilize customer-defined, virally-distributed infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! We will synthesize the ability of supply-chains to architect. We will recontextualize the capability of solutions to strategize. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Pegasus News is the industry leader of value-added synergies. Without sufficient e-services, interfaces are forced to become plug-and-play. A company that can seize correctly will (at some point) be able to evolve correctly. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance faithfully. What does the jargon-based buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? We think we know that if you revolutionize virally then you may also redefine interactively. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a killer game plan for handling emerging compliance metrics? The accounting management factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We will enhance the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". We here at Pegasus News have come to know that it is better to integrate perfectly than to upgrade intuitively. We will augment our ability to strategize without decreasing our capacity to empower. The metrics for holistic infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not proactive. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce metrics but our power to enable. Think 24/7/365. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our content but our ability to syndicate. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The TQC factor is customized. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine efficiently than to integrate wirelessly. Think viral. Pegasus News has refactored the abstraction of branding. The co-branded, long-term re-purposing factor is web-enabled. Think mega-60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable, resource-constrained. We realize that it is better to mesh vertically than to optimize intuitively. Think cyber-transparent. We always optimize dot-com seamless, global, fractal niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for handling unplanned-for functionalities? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for coping with new interfaces? Think co-branded. Think compelling. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized branding and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement.