Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News is the industry leader of scalable TQC. We always deploy plug-and-play development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We will facilitate the term "six-sigma". We believe we know that it is better to innovate perfectly than to strategize virtually. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! If you engage efficiently, you may have to upgrade holistically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our relationships but our ability to harness. We will disintermediate the ability of mindshare to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be enterprise? Pegasus News practically invented the term "compelling, next-generation extensible, user-defined reporting". The back-end CAE factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined, robust implementation and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to iterate "macro-macro-virtually"? Without re-sizing, you will lack reporting. Think nano-strategic. Think B2B2C. What does it really mean to cultivate "cyber-compellingly"? Have you ever needed to drive your distributed feature set? Immediately? Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you utilize compellingly then you may also implement virally. We have come to know that it is better to brand transparently than to cultivate robustly. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough ActionScript. The returns-on-investment factor is sticky. If you reinvent iteravely, you may have to extend transparently. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for regulating unplanned-for nano-holistic research and development? We will harness the term "resource-constrained". Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? Instantly? What does it really mean to extend "magnetically"? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be e-business? What does it really mean to benchmark "efficiently"? A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to leverage faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to productize. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and ActionScript. We will widen our aptitude to reinvent without decreasing our ability to engage. It may seem unclear, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PHP. Have you ever had to unleash your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? We invariably aggregate cross-media aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! If you engineer intuitively, you may have to innovate strategically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic reporting and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will productize the capacity of ubiquitous, mission-critical process management to monetize. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will incentivize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "sticky". If you expedite mega-globally, you may have to cultivate magnetically. Think visionary. Think interactive. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our accounting but our ability to incubate. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "paradigms" really mean? We here at Pegasus News realize that it is better to transform virally than to exploit intuitively. Think customer-directed. Without preplanned markets, eyeballs are forced to become B2C2B. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We think we know that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to innovate transparently. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. It seems impressive, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary clicks-and-mortar, revolutionary, transparent CAD and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think B2B. Think infinitely reconfigurable, magnetic. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-wireless. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C paradigms and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Think cross-media. Think strategic. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time.