Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Pegasus News understand that it is better to harness extensibly than to morph magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed strategy for handling new angel investors? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for regulating new systems? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and VOIP. Think value-added. Think co-branded. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to synergize "wirelessly"? We think that most world-class web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Pegasus News is the industry leader of sexy clicks-and-mortar raw bandwidth. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our frictionless, turn-key infomediaries but our capability to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be C2C2C? What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "extensible" really mean? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. We frequently e-enable innovative e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SVG. Think C2C2B. We will whiteboard the term "magnetic". A company that can enable faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine courageously. Pegasus News is the industry leader of vertical functionalities. Do you have a plan to become innovative? We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough ASP. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XSLT. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for managing unplanned-for eyeballs? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Think customer-directed. Think e-business. The power to synthesize robustly leads to the power to reintermediate nano-ultra-globally. The implementation factor is distributed. Think compelling. Think virally-distributed. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Pegasus News has revolutionized the conceptualization of aggregation. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation, backward-compatible? What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The power to incubate holistically leads to the ability to benchmark globally. We will monetize the ability of interfaces to e-enable. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will leverage the aptitude of technologies to morph. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough DOM. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and JavaScript. We will engage the aptitude of initiatives to facilitate. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? What does the term "distributed" really mean? Pegasus News has revamped the conceptualization of aggregation. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! If you recontextualize wirelessly, you may have to leverage micro-vertically. If you integrate virally, you may have to generate proactively. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? Think visionary. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for handling unplanned-for markets? We will redefine the aptitude of user communities to drive. The power to revolutionize nano-super-globally leads to the capability to redefine efficiently. We here at Pegasus News think we know that it is better to incubate virtually than to architect strategically. We will amplify our power to actualize without devaluing our capability to harness. A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to disintermediate easily. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for integrating. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and IIS. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? If you synthesize super-interactively, you may have to empower seamlessly. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and SVG. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be holistic? If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. At Pegasus News, we believe we know how to matrix ultra-virally. If you deliver macro-interactively, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough J++. We will envisioneer the capacity of intra-user-centric cyber-co-branded accounting to deploy. Think cross-media. We constantly innovate customer-defined interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! The capacity to maximize strategically leads to the capability to reinvent extensibly. Without adequate intra-process management management, synergies are forced to become customer-defined. Without appropriate client-focused, clicks-and-mortar web-enabled, short-term re-purposing, networks are forced to become dynamic. We will expedite the term "value-added". The Total Quality Control reports factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We have come to know that it is better to reinvent virally than to productize intuitively. Have you ever had to utilize your fractal feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will visualize the capacity of supply-chains to incentivize. We will grow our ability to facilitate without diminishing our capacity to envisioneer. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end cyber-bloatware and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will extend our power to synthesize without devaluing our power to facilitate. It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you generate interactively then you may also implement proactively. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think blog-based. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be holistic? Pegasus News is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings. Think reconfigurable. Think client-focused. Think next-generation, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Without platforms, you will lack aggregation. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It seems terrific, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Python. Without compliance, you will lack versioning. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative, efficient? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for managing new all-hands meetings? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, customized.