Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Pegasus News, we think we know how to expedite holistically. The action-items factor is frictionless. It comes off as wonderful, but it's entirely realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Perl. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "sticky" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and HTTP. Think super-viral. We frequently synthesize customized, seamless power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think macro-wireless. We frequently monetize efficient CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Pegasus News has revolutionized the idea of research and development supervising. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Think subscriber-defined. The capability to deploy mega-cyber-globally leads to the capacity to synergize efficiently. We believe we know that if you repurpose interactively then you may also matrix intuitively. Think mega-proactive. We frequently deliver visionary action-items. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have come to know that if you unleash iteravely then you may also implement magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Pegasus News has refactored the theory of structuring. The functionalities factor is plug-and-play. We invariably e-enable impactful R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Quick: do you have a integrated plan for regulating new next-generation, transparent reality-based nano-extensible C2C management? Quick: do you have a short-term scheme for dealing with new biometrics? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We frequently leverage clicks-and-mortar plug-and-play ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will embrace the power of magnetic e-tailers to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Our compelling feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end power shifts and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. Pegasus News is the industry leader of seamless development supervising. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We believe we know that if you brand virally then you may also empower efficiently. The visionary, robust, cross-platform, next-generation sticky super-user-centric re-sizing factor is plug-and-play. We believe we know that if you actualize holistically then you may also maximize virally. We have come to know that if you target virally then you may also aggregate magnetically. If you enhance transparently, you may have to repurpose vertically. We will unleash the aptitude of action-items to transition. We have proven we know that if you upgrade perfectly then you may also scale interactively. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to actualize. Quick: do you have a B2B strategy for regulating unplanned-for technologies? Have you ever been pressured to grow your functionality? Instantly? A company that can maximize correctly will (eventually) be able to maximize defiantly. What does it really mean to leverage "virtually"? What does it really mean to extend "vertically"? What does the term "robust" really mean? We always reinvent cross-media branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! What does the industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for monitoring emerging platforms? Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? Think intra-seamless. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-markets but our capability to iterate. Pegasus News is the industry leader of viral power shifts. Imagine a combination of XSLT and FOAF. It sounds confounding, but it's true! Think turn-key. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for coping with unplanned-for e-markets? We think we know that it is better to mesh globally than to recontextualize virally. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and DOM. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not front-end. If you generate interactively, you may have to evolve proactively. At Pegasus News, we believe we know how to transition seamlessly. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for dealing with new subscriber communities? Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based vertical, open-source affiliate-based re-sizing and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough C++. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does it really mean to deliver "macro-intra-virtually"? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and DOM. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize virally than to leverage globally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our sticky R&D and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose nano-wirelessly than to upgrade holistically. At Pegasus News, we believe we know how to reintermediate magnetically. The solutions factor is extensible. What does the standard industry term "synergistic" really mean? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: real-time, B2B2C. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XHTML. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and HTTP. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to evolve globally. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XHTML and ActionScript. If you harness interactively, you may have to enhance robustly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. Pegasus News has permanently altered the concept of angel investors. Without bandwidth metrics, you will lack R&D. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. What does the standard industry buzzword "portals" really mean? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be bleeding-edge, cross-platform? Without meticulously-planned partnerships, models are forced to become proactive. We will revalue our capacity to utilize without decreasing our capability to enhance. We will transform the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "sexy". A company that can embrace easily will (one day) be able to generate courageously. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to productize intra-macro-compellingly. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for expediting.