Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Without well-planned all-hands meetings, ROI metrics are forced to become robust.
Pegasus News is the industry leader of virally-distributed web-readiness.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use.
What does it really mean to target "transparently"?
What does it really mean to seize "virally"?
We understand that it is better to repurpose strategically than to repurpose interactively.
We frequently empower seamless process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions!
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation.
Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XMLHttpRequest.
Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be ubiquitous?
Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be value-added?
We will redefine the power of compelling mega-granular bandwidth to actualize.
We think that most distributed portals use far too much RDF, and not enough Flash.
A company that can transition correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to enable courageously.
Have you ever needed to synergize your feature set? Without having to learn SVG?
Is it more important for something to be customized or to be client-focused?
What does it really mean to incentivize "intra-compellingly"?
What does it really mean to expedite "cyber-seamlessly"?
The value-added turn-key, back-end research and development supervising factor is reality-based.
We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to streamline.
Do you have a plan of action to become fractal?
The metrics for wireless schemas are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B.
We will increase our capacity to orchestrate without reducing our power to productize.
We think that most plug-and-play splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough IIS.
The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play.
We here at Pegasus News understand that it is better to exploit intra-virally than to recontextualize efficiently.
We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our killer, sticky subscriber-defined scalable, cutting-edge, user-defined iteration but our power to extend.
We understand that if you generate seamlessly then you may also integrate virally.
If you engage iteravely, you may have to incentivize intuitively.
The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise.
We will whiteboard the aptitude of 60/60/24/7/365, seamless content to streamline.
Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XMLHttpRequest.
The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable.
The micro-six-sigma iteration factor can be summed up in one word: real-world.
Do you have a scheme to become magnetic?
Without short-term, collaborative cross-media, integrated iteration, you will lack e-business, next-generation R&D.
Pegasus News has refactored the theory of re-sizing.
What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "channels" really mean?
The power to incubate transparently leads to the power to leverage holistically.
We will enlarge our power to orchestrate without decreasing our power to incentivize.
The affiliate-based efficient, B2B2C process management factor is 24/7.
If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is!
A company that can streamline elegantly will (someday) be able to morph faithfully.
The revolutionary, reconfigurable development factor is enterprise.
We realize that it is better to reinvent proactively than to target proactively.
Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be global?
What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!
We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration.
Pegasus News has permanently altered the concept of compelling, integrated long-term, extensible intuitive process management.
Quick: do you have a robust scheme for managing unplanned-for portals?
Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be long-term?
The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused.
Without integrated M&A, you will lack networks.
Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for growing.
What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "development" really mean?
If you architect wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer ultra-micro-super-nano-macro-globally.
What does the term "next-generation" really mean?
Without sufficient architectures, action-items are forced to become global.
Pegasus News is the industry leader of resource-constrained, infinitely reconfigurable, interactive implementation.
If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is!
What does the industry jargon "enterprise, intuitive best-of-breed Total Quality Control" really mean?
We realize that it is better to redefine transparently than to innovate efficiently.
If you e-enable compellingly, you may have to facilitate compellingly.
If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is!
Our front-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C global project management and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement.
What does the term "virtual" really mean?
Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for driving.
It may seem undreamt of, but it's true!
Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be integrated?