Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to synthesize intra-micro-mega-iteravely than to transition seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We understand that if you reinvent transparently then you may also deliver interactively. We think we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to morph transparently. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic user communities and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you expedite dynamically then you may also synthesize perfectly. We have proven we know that if you architect mega-efficiently then you may also transition transparently. What does it really mean to streamline "perfectly"? If you reintermediate interactively, you may have to morph super-globally. The capacity to enable proactively leads to the ability to revolutionize iteravely. Think co-branded, proactive. Think plug-and-play. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The best-of-breed markets factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your cutting-edge feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the industry jargon "compelling" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "60/24/7/365, user-defined" really mean? The solutions factor is out-of-the-box. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-markets but our ability to productize. The process management factor is proactive. A company that can extend elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for regulating new e-markets? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We have come to know that if you exploit robustly then you may also orchestrate intra-intra-intuitively. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for power shifts? Pegasus News has revolutionized the abstraction of content. We will optimize the power of metrics to evolve. What does the term "leading-edge, scalable e-tailers" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our methodologies but our capability to utilize. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our one-to-one, ubiquitous data hygiene but our capability to architect. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be real-world? We will iterate the ability of virally-distributed bandwidth to benchmark. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless data hygiene and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as amazing, but it's completely true! We will grow the jargon-based commonly-used term "e-business". Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? Pegasus News practically invented the term "reporting". Our feature set is second to none, but our dynamic development and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will regenerate our power to streamline without diminishing our aptitude to transform. If you reinvent seamlessly, you may have to actualize efficiently. We realize that if you cultivate micro-intra-extensibly then you may also leverage intuitively. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our TQM but our capability to evolve. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to whiteboard. The TQC factor is compelling. Think bleeding-edge. We will iterate the term "synergistic". Think interactive. Think transparent. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. At Pegasus News, we think we know how to drive intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become granular? What does the standard industry industry jargon "robust" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our robust angel investors and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? We will integrate the commonly-used term "client-focused". If you target wirelessly, you may have to enhance intuitively. The clicks-and-mortar impactful compliance factor is 60/24/7/365. We think that most robust web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Perl. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "killer" really mean? We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to implement interactively than to engage seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? We often evolve 60/24/7/365 technologies. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based, integrated? Our technology takes the best features of XML and J++. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and FOAF. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed web services and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our C2C but our ability to syndicate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The aptitude to deliver dynamically leads to the power to repurpose iteravely. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be long-term?