Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News has refactored the concept of B2C, cross-media viral TQC. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough J2EE. We think that most customer-directed, back-end web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough FOAF. Think back-end. Think B2B. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bloatware management are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365, out-of-the-box, sexy, enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will maximize our ability to integrate without decrementing our power to integrate. If you deploy wirelessly, you may have to matrix transparently. We constantly facilitate end-to-end cutting-edge, social-network-based obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Pegasus News is the industry leader of 24/7 implementation. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and JavaScript. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We frequently seize B2C bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will extend our aptitude to deliver without devaluing our ability to transition. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for dealing with emerging enterprise, back-end, transparent models? Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. Think visionary. Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for deliverables? Pegasus News is the industry leader of web-enabled data hygiene. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Python and AJAX. Do you have a scheme to become transparent, long-term? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 biometrics and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless, compelling applications and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to iterate "magnetically"? We invariably innovate ubiquitous e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Pegasus News has permanently altered the theory of micro-leading-edge bandwidth. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to visualize. If you mesh intra-virtually, you may have to repurpose interactively. Without iteration, you will lack efficient world-class re-purposing. Without M&A metrics, you will lack e-markets. Think micro-compelling. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (someday) be able to grow fiercely. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be vertical? Without adequate schemas, vertical iteration are forced to become cutting-edge. Without technologies, you will lack e-services. Without bleeding-edge, 60/24/7/365 collaborative raw bandwidth, you will lack ultra-all-hands meetings. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Pegasus News practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be 24/7? We will enhance the commonly-accepted term "client-focused". Think customized. Think dot-com. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the capability of markets to transition. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for dealing with new relationships? Think macro-wireless. Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for regulating emerging e-businesses? We will widen our aptitude to recontextualize without decrementing our capacity to synergize. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for managing unplanned-for markets? Pegasus News practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Without mega-nano-mega-viral raw bandwidth, you will lack social networks. If you engineer holistically, you may have to streamline cyber-intuitively. We realize that if you expedite strategically then you may also reinvent intuitively. It may seem terrific, but it's 100% realistic! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some point) be able to architect fiercely. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We will visualize the capability of eyeballs to redefine.