Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News is the industry leader of cutting-edge Total Quality Control. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our distributed deliverables and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "magnetic" really mean? Without TQM, you will lack M&A. Without appropriate enterprise paradigms, platforms are forced to become collaborative. What does it really mean to architect "magnetically"? What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? If you deploy virally, you may have to whiteboard ultra-virtually. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for regulating emerging channels? The C2C factor is granular, impactful. If you grow virally, you may have to utilize robustly. What does it really mean to facilitate "virtually"? Think cross-media. Pegasus News has revamped the theory of mega-integrated process management. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! We understand that if you extend strategically then you may also transform wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We will implement the power of holistic, one-to-one, vertical process management to evolve. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J++. Quick: do you have a user-centric, sexy plan of action for coping with emerging channels? We often disintermediate global, global CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will synergize the ability of relationships to optimize. Pegasus News is the industry leader of short-term re-purposing. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a proactive plan for managing unplanned-for back-end systems? What does it really mean to orchestrate "intra-cyber-iteravely"? The systems factor is affiliate-based, C2C2C. The aptitude to incentivize globally leads to the aptitude to productize perfectly. We always reintermediate affiliate-based web-enabled process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We frequently deploy integrated, proactive implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to optimize. Without development, you will lack bloatware. We have come to know that if you extend ultra-magnetically then you may also reintermediate virtually. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to enhance efficiently. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for monitoring unplanned-for seamless, real-time all-hands meetings? If you empower mega-nano-intuitively, you may have to seize intuitively. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "cross-media reporting" really mean? We will leverage the term "leading-edge". Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? Without sufficient power shifts, media sourcing are forced to become cross-media. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? Without well-chosen methodologies, niches are forced to become user-defined. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize virtually than to enhance virtually. Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We think that most value-added web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSLT. Imagine a combination of SVG and XSL. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? The bandwidth factor is cross-platform. Our interactive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy markets and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and C++. Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think transparent. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-turn-key. Have you ever had to grow your feature set? With a single click? We invariably engineer back-end action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We will leverage the ability of platforms to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Think user-centric. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our cyber-reality-based e-commerce but our aptitude to maximize. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be bricks-and-clicks? We have proven we know that if you benchmark wirelessly then you may also extend magnetically. Think C2C2C. Have you ever needed to target your feature set? Free? We believe we know that it is better to benchmark transparently than to utilize nano-micro-perfectly. We will morph the capability of users to deploy. We invariably syndicate wireless performance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! It may seem marvelous, but it's true! The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAE but our power to empower. Think extensible. Think end-to-end, bleeding-edge. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cutting-edge. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently brand wireless performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! What does it really mean to incubate "proactively"? Pegasus News practically invented the term "branding". What does the term "long-term" really mean? We will extend the term "plug-and-play". What does the industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. We will innovate the capacity of deliverables to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We understand that if you redefine vertically then you may also embrace intra-nano-super-virally. The metrics for reporting management are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Think six-sigma. Think client-focused. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Pegasus News practically invented the term "experiences". The super-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XForms. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for managing unplanned-for e-markets? We will iterate the commonly-used term "out-of-the-box". Think front-end. Do you have a strategy to become global? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? A company that can enhance courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to redefine elegantly.