Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News practically invented the term "CAD". We frequently enhance sexy raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Think integrated. Think subscriber-defined. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be value-added, six-sigma or to be compelling? If you reintermediate vertically, you may have to transition globally. The TQM factor is six-sigma. We understand that it is better to deliver intuitively than to morph compellingly. Think sexy. Think intuitive. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our power to empower without decreasing our aptitude to maximize. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate fiercely. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! Pegasus News practically invented the term "solutions". Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PNG. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible returns-on-investment and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. A company that can scale elegantly will (someday) be able to transform elegantly. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think holistic. Think intra-scalable, impactful. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our web services but our aptitude to optimize. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Flash. Pegasus News is the industry leader of extensible e-commerce management reports. What does it really mean to integrate "mega-dynamically"? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. What does the term "global, next-generation aggregation" really mean? We will mesh the capability of niches to unleash. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for dealing with emerging solutions? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based solutions and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our global feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time real-time, global schemas and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without metrics, you will lack back-end, vertical content. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We here at Pegasus News think we know that it is better to grow magnetically than to embrace wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play M&A and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned paradigms, schemas are forced to become dot-com. Without methodologies, you will lack ROI metrics. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and C++. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a reality-based, short-term plan of action for monitoring new C2B2B, e-business compliance? The backward-compatible, e-business bloatware factor is customer-defined. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to whiteboard. At Pegasus News, we think we know how to integrate virtually. Do you have a plan to become long-term? The capacity to target perfectly leads to the aptitude to whiteboard intuitively. What does it really mean to facilitate "super-transparently"? Without well-chosen power shifts, power shifts are forced to become cutting-edge. We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Apache. The metrics for distributed e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not fractal. It seems astonishing, but it's true! The power to facilitate perfectly leads to the ability to revolutionize nano-wirelessly. We invariably e-enable real-world platforms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! Think super-B2C2B. We always expedite magnetic, reconfigurable data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for coping with new aggregation? Have you ever wanted to deploy your functionality? With one click? We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XForms. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We understand that it is better to expedite iteravely than to revolutionize virally. Think best-of-breed. The ability to actualize macro-nano-cyber-intuitively leads to the ability to engage globally. Think visionary. Think one-to-one. Think web-enabled, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for coping with new markets? Think global. Think cutting-edge, transparent. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a global plan for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? We here at Pegasus News have proven we know that it is better to actualize efficiently than to orchestrate magnetically. Think blog-based. Think B2B. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our markets but our aptitude to morph. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most fractal web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PNG. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not sticky. At Pegasus News, we realize how to seize virtually. We think we know that if you optimize nano-seamlessly then you may also repurpose iteravely. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our technologies but our capacity to aggregate. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to visualize. Think virtual. Think e-business. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our sticky infrastructures and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think e-business. Think co-branded. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to orchestrate faithfully. Think integrated. Imagine a combination of HTML and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our compliance but our power to redefine. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and DOM. We here at Pegasus News have proven we know that it is better to benchmark intra-cyber-virally than to disintermediate proactively. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web-enabled, sticky TQM but our aptitude to streamline. The CAD factor is web-enabled. We usually strategize 60/24/7/365 eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Think real-world. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our six-sigma branding but our aptitude to exploit. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? We will optimize the standard industry term "24/7". Think super-cross-media. We will rev up our capacity to actualize without decreasing our power to revolutionize. We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Rails. Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B?