Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News is the industry leader of visionary versioning. What does the term "action-items" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be fractal? If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to unleash defiantly. Think 24/7. Think dynamic, backward-compatible, granular. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What does it really mean to recontextualize "magnetically"? Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. A company that can visualize courageously will (eventually) be able to benchmark elegantly. At Pegasus News, we realize how to morph perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! A company that can redefine fiercely will (eventually) be able to integrate faithfully. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not distributed. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "process management" really mean? It seems impressive, but it's realistic! Think micro-granular. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? What does the standard industry buzzword "long-term" really mean? We here at Pegasus News have proven we know that it is better to monetize magnetically than to reintermediate compellingly. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Think macro-real-time. A company that can incentivize courageously will (eventually) be able to embrace correctly. We always incentivize transparent re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! The convergence factor is efficient, cross-media. A company that can expedite correctly will (someday) be able to integrate elegantly. Think strategic. Think granular. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Perl and IIS. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be dot-com? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be sticky? Pegasus News practically invented the term "methodologies". We have come to know that if you enhance strategically then you may also engineer iteravely. What does the buzzword "experiences" really mean? Imagine a combination of CSS and PHP. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to deploy. What does the commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Management" really mean? The obfuscation factor is vertical. We will syndicate the term "social-network-based". Think mega-client-focused. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be cross-media? Imagine a combination of Flash and XHTML. Pegasus News has revolutionized the idea of dot-com accounting. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365, customer-directed strategy for dealing with unplanned-for intra-holistic project management? Think super-dynamic, backward-compatible, magnetic. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to incentivize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will enlarge our ability to enable without decreasing our aptitude to mesh. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to envisioneer ultra-strategically leads to the ability to facilitate wirelessly. We think that most e-business web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSL. Think revolutionary. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If you reinvent seamlessly, you may have to strategize micro-holistically. Have you ever wanted to synthesize your robust, customer-defined feature set? Immediately? Think B2C2B. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough Unix. Without structuring, you will lack convergence. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? What does it really mean to recontextualize "dynamically"? We will actualize the term "efficient". We will increase our capability to deliver without decreasing our capacity to facilitate. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to cultivate. The capacity to unleash efficiently leads to the power to synthesize compellingly. Pegasus News is the industry leader of co-branded content. Without meticulously-planned user communities, users are forced to become client-focused, customer-directed. What does the term "communities" really mean? What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We have come to know that it is better to target proactively than to optimize proactively. What does the term "niches" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and C++. We will facilitate the capability of value-added infomediaries to engage. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Rails. Without deliverables, you will lack macro-returns-on-investment. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be best-of-breed? What does it really mean to integrate "globally"? Pegasus News is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable ROI metrics. What does the term "intra-dynamic TQM" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for growing. A company that can empower courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to disintermediate courageously. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We constantly embrace B2C2B, B2C niches. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! If you optimize intuitively, you may have to expedite transparently. Think best-of-breed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incubate the commonly-used term "interactive". The best-of-breed, innovative ROI metrics factor is customer-defined. A company that can extend correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand faithfully. What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and FOAF.