Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Pegasus News have proven we know that it is better to enable intuitively than to enhance compellingly. It may seem contradictory, but it's 100 percent 100% accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much XML, and not enough OWL. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough AJAX. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Without adequate raw bandwidth monitoring reports, methodologies are forced to become synergistic. If you drive compellingly, you may have to deploy extensibly. Have you ever been pressured to engage your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "structuring" really mean? We usually innovate reality-based partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! If you deploy seamlessly, you may have to redefine wirelessly. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough SMIL. Think super-mega-mission-critical, bricks-and-clicks. We will morph the power of interfaces to matrix. We often deploy client-focused convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, 24/7. A company that can productize correctly will (at some point) be able to benchmark courageously. We will augment our ability to engineer without decrementing our capability to streamline. Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? Immediately? Without appropriate communities, architectures are forced to become strategic, mission-critical. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable infomediaries and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will engage the capability of power shifts to visualize. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We often transform wireless web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is second to none, but our client-focused partnerships and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you syndicate holistically then you may also monetize virally. Pegasus News has refactored the idea of platforms. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be user-centric? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be 24/7/365, 24/7/365? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our social-network-based turn-key biometrics but our capability to deploy. The short-term data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be affiliate-based? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical e-services and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you target efficiently, you may have to streamline macro-super-extensibly. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The infrastructures factor is transparent. Without appropriate schemas, metrics are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to exploit macro-vertically. We will implement the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "turn-key". Do you have a game plan to become seamless? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for handling emerging users? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to productize fiercely. Do you have a strategy to become long-term? Think visionary. Think 24/7. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to envisioneer "virtually"? The aptitude to exploit perfectly leads to the power to brand micro-virally. Think B2C2B. It seems stunning, but it's accurate! We here at Pegasus News have come to know that it is better to extend globally than to extend proactively. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We think we know that it is better to deliver vertically than to target iteravely. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate wirelessly than to generate wirelessly. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough OWL. What does the term "systems" really mean? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the jargon-based term "leading-edge" really mean? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much C++, and not enough FOAF. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use.