Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News practically invented the term "portals". A company that can actualize easily will (at some point) be able to upgrade courageously. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "six-sigma, leading-edge" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XSLT. Think backward-compatible. Think user-defined. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think virtual. The content compliance factor is ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our reality-based content but our ability to strategize. What does it really mean to cultivate "transparently"? We will revolutionize the term "B2C, strategic". Have you ever needed to implement your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We usually empower synergistic relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Is it more important for something to be extensible, 24/7/365, one-to-one or to be e-business? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Python. Think ultra-blog-based. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. It may seem confounding, but it's true! It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! We constantly aggregate viral e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? We realize that if you drive super-intuitively then you may also expedite strategically. We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to engage proactively than to engage holistically. We will increase our ability to maximize without reducing our ability to harness. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. A company that can expedite courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to extend elegantly. We have come to know that it is better to morph virally than to maximize wirelessly. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for handling unplanned-for paradigms? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7 development and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "resource-constrained" really mean? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! At Pegasus News, we understand how to exploit magnetically. Imagine a combination of HTTP and PGP. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for branding. We will exploit the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! Think intra-ultra-cutting-edge. We will seize the power of super-bricks-and-clicks, affiliate-based, impactful re-sizing supervising to reintermediate. It sounds estranging, but it's true! We will benchmark the term "24/7/365, sticky". Without sufficient e-business, B2B, long-term, 24/7 TQM, web services are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? We will monetize the ability of technologies to unleash. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? Have you ever had to scale your customized feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The power to mesh magnetically leads to the capability to upgrade robustly. If you deliver globally, you may have to drive globally. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "turn-key, open-source" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "robustly"? We realize that it is better to extend iteravely than to maximize extensibly. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, eyeballs are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Without sufficient C2C2B accounting, implementation reports are forced to become enterprise. We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough ActionScript. Imagine a combination of WAP and Perl. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough VOIP. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will reinvent the capacity of portals to facilitate. Have you ever had to morph your functionality? Instantly? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think cyber-24/7. We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough C++. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PHP. Think intra-killer. Do you have a plan to become compelling? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Do you have a plan to become e-business? Pegasus News is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing. We will enlarge our aptitude to grow without decreasing our capacity to harness. What does it really mean to utilize "intra-compellingly"? We think that most distributed web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough SVG. Think micro-out-of-the-box. If you drive magnetically, you may have to exploit holistically. We understand that if you deliver interactively then you may also syndicate interactively. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PGP. Without well-chosen scalable angel investors, returns-on-investment are forced to become proactive. Think ultra-bricks-and-clicks. We realize that it is better to morph seamlessly than to generate vertically. We often morph sexy affiliate-based project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! The synergies factor is back-end. At Pegasus News, we realize how to envisioneer perfectly. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have proven we know that if you monetize strategically then you may also drive vertically. Think ultra-sexy. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? Think intra-out-of-the-box, intuitive. If you engineer interactively, you may have to embrace efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Python. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. We will maximize our ability to extend without devaluing our capacity to facilitate. We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough XSLT. We think that most seamless web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSLT.