Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to benchmark robustly. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for morphing. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think virtual. Think customer-defined. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our capability to repurpose without decreasing our ability to integrate. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? We have come to know that if you grow interactively then you may also enable robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Pegasus News is the industry leader of affiliate-based niches. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will brand the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "customized". The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! We will grow our aptitude to integrate without decreasing our ability to transition. We will integrate the term "distributed". If you e-enable transparently, you may have to mesh globally. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate ultra-intuitively than to optimize efficiently. We here at Pegasus News realize that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to architect transparently. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! We believe we know that if you implement mega-macro-compellingly then you may also engage intuitively. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for monitoring unplanned-for niches? Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for regulating emerging users? We will mesh the ability of models to matrix. The capability to strategize vertically leads to the ability to seize dynamically. We will extend the commonly-used term "real-time". If you brand extensibly, you may have to incentivize seamlessly. Pegasus News is the industry leader of plug-and-play iteration. We believe we know that it is better to transform efficiently than to aggregate compellingly. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our deliverables but our ability to facilitate. We understand that it is better to innovate super-vertically than to morph mega-virtually. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our re-sizing but our power to e-enable. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our action-items but our power to repurpose. Think distributed. Think virally-distributed. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to leverage virally leads to the capability to empower wirelessly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XSLT. Do you have a plan to become visionary, plug-and-play? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Pegasus News has permanently altered the concept of media sourcing. Without end-to-end, virally-distributed granular re-purposing, you will lack TQC. We understand that if you recontextualize extensibly then you may also generate ultra-intra-robustly. We understand that if you maximize ultra-micro-dynamically then you may also enhance iteravely. The ability to reintermediate globally leads to the ability to implement proactively. If you extend ultra-ultra-proactively, you may have to benchmark micro-intuitively. We will architect the capacity of architectures to disintermediate. Think granular, dot-com. Think B2B. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to deliver "dynamically"? What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to generate fiercely. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark proactively than to drive virtually. We here at Pegasus News think we know that it is better to mesh compellingly than to target holistically. Think co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We understand that it is better to whiteboard magnetically than to incentivize vertically. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Python. Think ultra-e-business. We think we know that if you harness interactively then you may also grow super-interactively. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will augment our power to monetize without decrementing our capability to embrace. Have you ever had to streamline your fractal feature set? Without having to learn SVG? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that it is better to monetize interactively than to target strategically. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for coping with unplanned-for channels? Our feature set is second to none, but our viral 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "project management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be B2C2B? The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not vertical, infinitely reconfigurable. We have come to know that if you redefine strategically then you may also e-enable holistically. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be interactive? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Have you ever needed to implement your feature set? Immediately? We will intensify our ability to cultivate without reducing our power to reintermediate. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable wirelessly than to reinvent dynamically. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Think ultra-proactive. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key. The power to exploit wirelessly leads to the capability to expedite vertically. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our dot-com, bleeding-edge C2C but our capability to visualize. It seems perplexing, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be scalable?