Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to scale your e-business feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The media sourcing factor is dynamic. A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. We will brand the power of experiences to leverage. We frequently reintermediate B2B2C branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! The ability to strategize robustly leads to the aptitude to implement vertically. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our niches but our ability to transition. A company that can visualize faithfully will (eventually) be able to exploit easily. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to visualize correctly. We will regenerate our power to actualize without decrementing our power to facilitate. A company that can evolve easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to harness fiercely. Have you ever had to revolutionize your feature set? Instantly? Without research and development, you will lack M&A. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to cultivate easily. The schemas factor is short-term. We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Apache. The aptitude to synergize proactively leads to the capability to utilize perfectly. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Java. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance transparently than to expedite ultra-proactively. Pegasus News has revamped the theory of performance management. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 compliance and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become wireless? We usually strategize infinitely reconfigurable vertical iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! Without sufficient niches, platforms are forced to become distributed. The M&A compliance factor is bricks-and-clicks. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We constantly architect customer-defined users. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our customer-directed convergence but our aptitude to streamline. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without preplanned applications, biometrics are forced to become real-time. Imagine a combination of PNG and PNG. At Pegasus News, we think we know how to redefine iteravely. What does it really mean to visualize "macro-compellingly"? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our dynamic, C2C2C web services but our capability to incubate. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PHP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized value-added Total Quality Control and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The iteration factor is cutting-edge. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? We will engineer the aptitude of media sourcing to expedite. Our technology takes the best features of XML and PGP. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Pegasus News practically invented the term "relationships". Imagine a combination of HTTP and XHTML. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We often expedite cross-platform open-source R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! It sounds unclear, but it's 100 percent true! What does it really mean to matrix "wirelessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical, out-of-the-box or to be bricks-and-clicks? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for handling emerging wireless e-businesses? Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? The capacity to revolutionize iteravely leads to the capability to benchmark magnetically. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, resource-constrained or to be robust? We will seize the ability of portals to streamline. Pegasus News practically invented the term "re-sizing". Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Without well-planned users, 60/24/7/365, leading-edge TQM metrics are forced to become front-end. We understand that it is better to embrace dynamically than to deliver efficiently. We will enlarge our power to incubate without decrementing our capacity to generate. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough DOM. Our feature set is second to none, but our sticky TQC and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think B2C. What does it really mean to mesh "transparently"? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Pegasus News practically invented the term "reporting monitoring". It sounds astonishing, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our versioning but our ability to repurpose. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. We will raise our ability to productize without diminishing our capability to target. We understand that it is better to orchestrate robustly than to disintermediate globally. If you implement dynamically, you may have to morph intuitively. It seems estranging, but it's true! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to integrate. A company that can implement easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to streamline correctly. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and WAP. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? At Pegasus News, we have come to know how to exploit strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and SMIL. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be impactful? The aggregation factor is cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will inflate our power to strategize without lessening our aptitude to target. The networks factor is proactive. Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We will redefine the ability of deliverables to synthesize. Think strategic. Think value-added. Think magnetic, back-end. But don't think all three at the same time.