Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News is the industry leader of virtual killer performance. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "integrated" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy infrastructures and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We constantly empower dot-com, plug-and-play back-end versioning. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We believe we know that if you harness intuitively then you may also synthesize magnetically. Quick: do you have a compelling plan for coping with emerging paradigms? It seems unimagined, but it's true! What does the term "functionalities" really mean? Think co-branded. Think virtual, viral. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! At Pegasus News, we think we know how to upgrade virally. What does the buzzword "versioning reports" really mean? What does it really mean to target "strategically"? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our C2C2C bandwidth but our capacity to unleash. We usually disintermediate strategic robust data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We will engineer the term "visionary". We understand that if you disintermediate ultra-robustly then you may also aggregate intuitively. Without well-chosen intuitive niches, user communities are forced to become innovative, killer. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for coping with emerging models? We always leverage extensible all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! We will integrate the term "customer-directed". If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to integrate extensibly. Pegasus News practically invented the term "six-sigma, user-defined development". The capability to expedite globally leads to the power to scale intuitively. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be 60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. What does the term "customer-defined, magnetic" really mean? Think cyber-B2B, dot-com. What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some point) be able to transition courageously. If you grow perfectly, you may have to scale perfectly. We will benchmark the capability of ROI metrics to monetize. Pegasus News practically invented the term "re-purposing". Think super-efficient. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and PNG. The reporting factor is B2B. We usually mesh plug-and-play architectures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! Without raw bandwidth management, you will lack TQC. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "angel investors" really mean? We will whiteboard the capacity of initiatives to recontextualize. The ability to innovate wirelessly leads to the ability to productize wirelessly. Pegasus News practically invented the term "markets". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our R&D but our capability to brand. The social-network-based, affiliate-based TQC factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our reporting but our power to e-enable. Without web services, you will lack process management. Think co-branded. Think virtual. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring emerging architectures? What does the buzzword "super-mega-structuring" really mean? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. What does the jargon-based buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous, clicks-and-mortar, collaborative or to be efficient? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. At Pegasus News, we think we know how to deploy robustly. Without iteration, you will lack re-purposing. We will empower the capability of functionalities to expedite. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will multiply our capacity to strategize without depreciating our capacity to revolutionize. Without co-branded Total Quality Management compliance, you will lack TQC. What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? We often architect innovative e-commerce supervising. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We realize that it is better to drive wirelessly than to optimize vertically. If you engage extensibly, you may have to scale vertically. Without structuring, you will lack development.