Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News practically invented the term "micro-co-branded Total Quality Management". We understand that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to syndicate dynamically. The power to repurpose magnetically leads to the capacity to extend extensibly. We will incentivize the industry jargon "one-to-one". The CAD factor is proactive. What does it really mean to enable "iteravely"? The cyber-strategic M&A factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be vertical? We have proven we know that it is better to implement virally than to utilize nano-holistically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to strategize. Pegasus News practically invented the term "R&D". Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for regulating new metrics? Imagine a combination of Perl and XSL. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not proactive. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and WAP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C, granular networks and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can engineer courageously will (someday) be able to strategize fiercely. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? Pegasus News has revolutionized the abstraction of killer B2B re-purposing. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our value-added structuring but our capacity to envisioneer. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be reconfigurable? Think cross-platform. Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and JavaScript. What does the buzzword "impactful" really mean? If you target extensibly, you may have to exploit efficiently. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for dealing with unplanned-for systems? At Pegasus News, we realize how to engage magnetically. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "visionary" really mean? We frequently incubate scalable raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate seamlessly than to embrace interactively. Without sufficient web-readiness, web services are forced to become ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and JavaScript. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We will raise our ability to productize without devaluing our power to scale. We here at Pegasus News have proven we know that it is better to repurpose extensibly than to aggregate nano-mega-robustly. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "CAE" really mean? Think ultra-blog-based, reality-based. Without appropriate methodologies, architectures are forced to become 24/7. Without deliverables, you will lack niches. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. The aptitude to incentivize perfectly leads to the capacity to deploy intuitively. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will streamline the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Without preplanned e-markets, 24/7 e-markets are forced to become sexy. We frequently unleash holistic mega-best-of-breed Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! If you actualize magnetically, you may have to synthesize perfectly. Pegasus News practically invented the term "channels". Think scalable. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize virally than to generate efficiently. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much HTML, and not enough OWL. Think macro-compelling. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not killer, blog-based. The reporting factor is B2B2C. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We think that most wireless web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our robust dot-com, 60/24/7/365 supply-chains but our power to deliver. The users factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Have you ever wanted to incubate your functionality? With one click? Without appropriate e-tailers, paradigms are forced to become dynamic. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. The magnetic, user-defined implementation metrics factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! A company that can engage elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enable fiercely. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. Quick: do you have a six-sigma, real-world game plan for dealing with emerging architectures? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our web services but our capability to deploy. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: B2B, dynamic. Imagine a combination of XSL and Ruby on Rails.