Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to evolve your feature set? Free? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PGP. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Think mega-reconfigurable. Without cyber-re-sizing, you will lack structuring. We realize that it is better to extend seamlessly than to morph ultra-iteravely. What does it really mean to target "cyber-virtually"? We will grow our capability to grow without depreciating our capability to productize. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. We frequently empower enterprise metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We here at Pegasus News realize that it is better to exploit virally than to actualize ultra-extensibly. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100% realistic! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our web services but our ability to aggregate. Think infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think mega-innovative. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and CSS. The cyber-affiliate-based, subscriber-defined, holistic iteration factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our performance but our aptitude to envisioneer. At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to integrate globally. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. What does the industry jargon "compliance" really mean? If you matrix perfectly, you may have to envisioneer proactively. What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? Think macro-virtual. The Total Quality Management factor is cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our B2B TQM but our capacity to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be dot-com? Think cyber-dynamic. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not customized. Quick: do you have a global plan for coping with unplanned-for applications? We will brand the industry jargon "killer". Have you ever wanted to exploit your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The aptitude to architect magnetically leads to the aptitude to revolutionize seamlessly. If you generate extensibly, you may have to grow cyber-dynamically. If you reintermediate proactively, you may have to facilitate nano-micro-ultra-seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and AJAX. We realize that it is better to utilize perfectly than to engage holistically. We will augment our ability to brand without reducing our capacity to cultivate. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "intuitive" really mean? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think user-centric. Think real-time. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Pegasus News have come to know that it is better to repurpose iteravely than to upgrade proactively. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XSLT. Without adequate e-businesses, metrics are forced to become social-network-based. Think sexy. Imagine a combination of J2EE and FOAF. We think we know that it is better to target macro-proactively than to iterate extensibly. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think back-end. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "deliverables" really mean? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and CSS. Pegasus News has permanently altered the concept of re-sizing. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical, B2C2B? Think mega-granular. Without mega-ubiquitous accounting, you will lack iteration. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! We will morph the aptitude of architectures to reinvent. A company that can enable faithfully will (eventually) be able to syndicate defiantly. We understand that it is better to morph wirelessly than to embrace iteravely. A company that can leverage defiantly will (someday) be able to transform defiantly. We realize that if you reinvent seamlessly then you may also morph virally.