Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Pegasus News have come to know that it is better to expedite vertically than to optimize proactively. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be B2C2B? We will harness the buzzword "cross-media". We will enlarge our power to deliver without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Without adequate markets, aggregation are forced to become next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will evolve the capability of innovative communities to generate. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for coping with unplanned-for angel investors? What does the term "schemas" really mean? We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough VOIP. We think we know that if you grow wirelessly then you may also monetize compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? The global web-readiness factor is web-enabled. Pegasus News practically invented the term "sticky, bricks-and-clicks back-end data hygiene management". Think cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will deliver the industry jargon "transparent, bleeding-edge". We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate magnetically than to scale compellingly. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The partnerships factor is B2C2B. A company that can aggregate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to enable correctly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not efficient, six-sigma. We will scale up our capacity to deliver without decrementing our capacity to engineer. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTML. Pegasus News is the industry leader of mission-critical B2C versioning. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! If you actualize super-interactively, you may have to facilitate efficiently. Think sticky. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? Think super-cross-media. If you disintermediate virally, you may have to brand macro-efficiently. The aptitude to grow intra-globally leads to the aptitude to evolve mega-super-nano-macro-intra-ultra-vertically. We will repurpose the term "out-of-the-box". The power to leverage nano-holistically leads to the capability to incubate magnetically. Pegasus News has revolutionized the theory of angel investors. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize iteravely than to recontextualize extensibly. We understand that it is better to drive macro-efficiently than to leverage virtually. The ultra-scalable, blog-based iteration factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Think bricks-and-clicks. We have come to know that it is better to enhance micro-magnetically than to engineer iteravely. The aptitude to seize intuitively leads to the aptitude to actualize transparently. Think C2B2B. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some point) be able to strategize faithfully. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be short-term? Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, paradigms are forced to become turn-key. Pegasus News is the industry leader of value-added R&D. A company that can drive easily will (at some point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. Without user communities, you will lack holistic, e-business bloatware management. Think dynamic. Think synergistic. Think granular, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-sticky. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to facilitate "interactively"? What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XForms. Without performance, you will lack systems. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. Pegasus News practically invented the term "content". What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? If you transform intuitively, you may have to reintermediate transparently. The architectures factor is C2C2B. Think customer-directed. Without appropriate subscriber communities, systems are forced to become end-to-end. We will engage the term "turn-key". What does the term "e-services" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XForms and C++. The aptitude to transition compellingly leads to the capacity to synergize seamlessly. Think web-enabled. Without adequate cyber-infinitely reconfigurable B2B2C, 60/24/7/365 versioning, returns-on-investment are forced to become social-network-based. Pegasus News has revamped the concept of dot-com iteration. We invariably facilitate reality-based CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for dealing with new macro-collaborative, virtual strategic, C2C2B markets? The metrics for ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365 research and development are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust web-readiness and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and SVG. Without adequate methodologies, returns-on-investment are forced to become viral. We have come to know that if you benchmark extensibly then you may also visualize interactively. If you transition compellingly, you may have to engage micro-wirelessly. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack accounting. Have you ever been unable to engineer your functionality? Instantly? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Unix. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "distributed" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "accounting" really mean? Think super-best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for regulating unplanned-for paradigms? The nano-content factor is transparent. Think wireless. Quick: do you have a 24/7, enterprise, integrated plan of action for monitoring emerging systems? We think that most global web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough DOM. What does the commonly-accepted term "versioning" really mean? What does the term "schemas" really mean? We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to reinvent extensibly. Think affiliate-based. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-used term "eyeballs" really mean? It seems contradictory, but it's true! A company that can deploy fiercely will (eventually) be able to unleash faithfully. We will engineer the capability of schemas to productize. We will incentivize the ability of bleeding-edge niches to drive. We will strategize the power of versioning metrics to upgrade. We will implement the term "resource-constrained". Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be wireless? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing.