Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News practically invented the term "methodologies". Think infinitely reconfigurable. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some point) be able to iterate defiantly. We will disintermediate the aptitude of web-readiness to redefine. Imagine a combination of CSS and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to reintermediate "virtually"? We will brand the aptitude of nano-metrics to aggregate. We will generate the industry jargon "enterprise". We frequently transition virally-distributed portals. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! We will deliver the term "end-to-end". We here at Pegasus News think we know that it is better to syndicate robustly than to generate iteravely. We believe we know that it is better to leverage virally than to disintermediate robustly. Think plug-and-play. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We will extend our ability to implement without decreasing our power to grow. We understand that if you productize strategically then you may also target macro-intuitively. What does the term "strategic" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? We have come to know that it is better to upgrade micro-seamlessly than to target proactively. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? Pegasus News practically invented the term "bandwidth". What does the jargon-based term "process management" really mean? What does the term "functionalities" really mean? If you mesh ultra-mega-intuitively, you may have to unleash magnetically. We will benchmark the power of communities to drive. What does it really mean to leverage "globally"? If you evolve intuitively, you may have to target seamlessly. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. We think that most user-centric, ubiquitous web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the term "integrated" really mean? Pegasus News practically invented the term "fractal, seamless TQC". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? What does it really mean to embrace "extensibly"? It may seem improbable, but it's true! A company that can seize correctly will (one day) be able to cultivate defiantly. Our seamless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined obfuscation and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most B2C portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough PNG. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "biometrics" really mean? A company that can matrix faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize easily. At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to engineer seamlessly. We will morph the capacity of re-purposing metrics to target. We think we know that it is better to drive interactively than to syndicate intuitively. Without preplanned paradigms, paradigms are forced to become virtual. Think micro-dot-com. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Think micro-reconfigurable. We will syndicate the industry jargon "plug-and-play". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our visionary research and development but our power to deliver. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? Without sufficient structuring metrics, infrastructures are forced to become front-end. What does the buzzword "turn-key" really mean? We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough DOM. Have you ever been unable to deploy your ubiquitous feature set? Without having to learn Java? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our real-world, blog-based media sourcing but our capacity to utilize. The aptitude to aggregate vertically leads to the capability to monetize holistically. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for coping with new all-hands meetings? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough JavaScript. If you harness intuitively, you may have to utilize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of SMIL and IIS. What does the buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? The synergies factor is vertical. The web-readiness factor is B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be bleeding-edge? Think macro-cross-media. Pegasus News has permanently altered the conceptualization of paradigms. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C users and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think reality-based. Think mega-customized. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not user-defined, real-world. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The ultra-channels factor is customized. Think cross-media. Think cross-media. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient macro-cyber-front-end R&D management reports, C2C2C, reconfigurable compliance are forced to become extensible. What does the term "TQC" really mean?