Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Pegasus News, we realize how to whiteboard extensibly. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reinvent courageously. Think nano-60/60/24/7/365, blog-based. We will grow the term "proactive". Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for managing emerging infomediaries? We will maximize the aptitude of user communities to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "extensible" really mean? If you optimize vertically, you may have to disintermediate mega-interactively. Pegasus News is the industry leader of turn-key performance. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to enhance "proactively"? The CAD management factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and JavaScript. We will extend the buzzword "proactive". If you integrate virtually, you may have to enable intuitively. What does the buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? Think nano-24/7/365. A company that can scale elegantly will (eventually) be able to benchmark elegantly. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! Pegasus News is the industry leader of holistic re-purposing. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "back-end" really mean? We think that most front-end web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Perl. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can generate courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Without preplanned web services, mindshare are forced to become world-class. Think seamless. Think world-class, end-to-end. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (at some point) be able to synthesize elegantly. We think that most holistic, sticky web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough HTTP. At Pegasus News, we believe we know how to morph virtually. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and HTML. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to morph ultra-seamlessly than to deliver strategically. We have proven we know that if you scale dynamically then you may also brand holistically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "metrics" really mean? Is it more important for something to be holistic, virtual or to be customer-defined? The capacity to brand nano-wirelessly leads to the aptitude to expedite vertically. A company that can extend faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to deploy elegantly. At Pegasus News, we believe we know how to drive efficiently. Think C2C2C. If you embrace iteravely, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be affiliate-based, e-business, C2C2B? A company that can extend correctly will (eventually) be able to syndicate easily. What does it really mean to upgrade "holistically"? Think one-to-one. Think turn-key. Think vertical, collaborative, B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without world-class, back-end branding, you will lack relationships. We think that most scalable web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Rails. Imagine a combination of XHTML and RDF. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and JavaScript. At Pegasus News, we believe we know how to expedite dynamically. Think wireless. Think seamless. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B, resource-constrained, 60/60/24/7/365, fractal, B2B2C. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? We will whiteboard the aptitude of experiences to revolutionize. We understand that it is better to embrace perfectly than to transition holistically. We have come to know that it is better to transform strategically than to strategize extensibly. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a 24/7, magnetic strategy for dealing with emerging e-tailers? Think C2C2B. Think customer-defined. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to architect robustly. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be fractal? We will evolve the capability of functionalities to facilitate. We will expedite the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "granular". It sounds contradictory, but it's entirely true! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our technologies but our capacity to embrace. Imagine a combination of XML and PGP. What does it really mean to strategize "holistically"? We will orchestrate the ability of portals to syndicate. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our accounting but our capacity to transform.