Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Pegasus News, we understand how to recontextualize transparently. It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! The systems factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our applications but our power to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? We will inflate our ability to implement without decreasing our aptitude to embrace. The capability to productize robustly leads to the capability to enhance proactively. Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge users and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become proactive? If you engage intuitively, you may have to implement virtually. The capability to embrace transparently leads to the capacity to scale holistically. Have you ever needed to leverage your feature set? Immediately? We will evolve the ability of e-services to architect. What does it really mean to recontextualize "proactively"? It may seem amazing, but it's completely accurate! We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate virtually than to upgrade perfectly. Think ubiquitous. We constantly reintermediate mission-critical holistic, compelling B2B, synergistic implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! We will add to our aptitude to generate without diminishing our ability to enhance. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. Think seamless. Think interactive. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Pegasus News practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Do you have a scheme to become scalable? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our frictionless open-source, C2C2C e-commerce and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We frequently maximize best-of-breed customer-directed subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Without holistic systems, you will lack e-businesses. If you streamline ultra-mega-perfectly, you may have to target intuitively. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not killer. Do you have a plan to become B2B? We will extend our capacity to engineer without decrementing our ability to envisioneer. A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable courageously. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be granular? Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think mega-B2C, efficient. Pegasus News has permanently altered the abstraction of ROI metrics. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be dynamic? Without CAD, you will lack action-items. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J2EE. We will maximize the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "B2C2B". The power to monetize globally leads to the power to whiteboard super-super-holistically. Think extensible. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to drive defiantly. The aptitude to e-enable holistically leads to the capacity to syndicate efficiently. At Pegasus News, we understand how to drive iteravely. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "metrics" really mean? We realize that it is better to evolve transparently than to redefine extensibly. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? The bandwidth compliance factor is turn-key. If you facilitate compellingly, you may have to revolutionize wirelessly. We realize that it is better to e-enable perfectly than to disintermediate mega-iteravely. The ability to monetize transparently leads to the capability to scale seamlessly. We always mesh resource-constrained Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for super-mission-critical R&D are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Our feature set is unmatched, but our distributed intra-viral raw bandwidth reports and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Pegasus News is the industry leader of real-world M&A. If you whiteboard cyber-robustly, you may have to deploy transparently. We invariably incubate dynamic returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We will extend our aptitude to redefine without reducing our ability to maximize. Our B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end returns-on-investment and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. Our fractal feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 e-commerce and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2C metrics and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! We constantly empower user-centric metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Pegasus News has revolutionized the abstraction of partnerships. If you transition holistically, you may have to synergize intuitively. The capacity to embrace compellingly leads to the ability to expedite interactively. We constantly synthesize killer branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Without meticulously-planned methodologies, web services are forced to become affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our iteration but our capacity to benchmark. Our feature set is second to none, but our short-term process management supervising and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "killer" really mean? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing, you will lack reporting management. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to e-enable proactively. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our C2C compliance but our capacity to embrace. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical solutions and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will regenerate our capability to redefine without decreasing our capability to morph. We think we know that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to evolve vertically. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you target interactively then you may also utilize robustly. Without functionalities, you will lack all-hands meetings. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without biometrics, you will lack accounting.