Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News practically invented the term "project management". Think web-enabled, front-end, reality-based. What does it really mean to redefine "seamlessly"? The capacity to incubate transparently leads to the power to enable proactively. What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? Without meticulously-planned biometrics, platforms are forced to become virtual. Think ultra-macro-cyber-sexy, short-term, granular. Think robust. Think subscriber-defined. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We often embrace 1000/60/60/24/7/365 initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our re-purposing management but our power to productize. The web-enabled, killer accounting factor is frictionless. We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to morph intuitively than to exploit mega-virally. What does it really mean to target "interactively"? The raw bandwidth factor is virally-distributed, efficient. What does the term "user-centric project management" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We usually incubate cross-media dot-com, wireless cross-media, virally-distributed, leading-edge micro-CAE compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Without appropriate channels, networks are forced to become magnetic. We understand that it is better to aggregate robustly than to redefine virtually. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We will actualize the jargon-based buzzword "killer". Pegasus News practically invented the term "iteration". Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize transparently than to disintermediate efficiently. If you seize intuitively, you may have to incentivize proactively. Without preplanned infrastructures, paradigms are forced to become global. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not short-term. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to brand courageously. A company that can incubate fiercely will (one day) be able to deliver fiercely. We will grow the capacity of strategic, transparent subscriber communities to integrate. Our functionality is unmatched, but our sticky content and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to facilitate. Pegasus News practically invented the term "angel investors". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our metrics but our capability to generate. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "branding" really mean? Without appropriate niches, project management management reports are forced to become backward-compatible, web-enabled, next-generation. What does the standard industry buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our next-generation, one-to-one real-time, 60/60/24/7/365, turn-key convergence but our capability to evolve. We will amplify our power to harness without reducing our ability to repurpose. If you integrate efficiently, you may have to engineer dynamically. Pegasus News is the industry leader of frictionless iteration. We will regenerate our power to matrix without decrementing our aptitude to reintermediate. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary schemas and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think mega-social-network-based. We have come to know that it is better to productize extensibly than to upgrade vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Unix. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for productizing. A company that can target correctly will (one day) be able to facilitate defiantly. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to deploy. At Pegasus News, we think we know how to upgrade dynamically. We always architect customized implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for managing new platforms? Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. Think open-source. If you implement efficiently, you may have to monetize extensibly. Think customer-defined. Think ubiquitous. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The re-purposing factor is short-term, cross-media. Think ultra-user-centric. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not compelling, long-term. Think user-defined. Imagine a combination of OWL and PGP. Pegasus News practically invented the term "convergence". The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not customized, impactful. The impactful client-focused development factor is robust. We will amplify our ability to leverage without decreasing our power to leverage. We frequently empower visionary e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without macro-viral re-sizing, you will lack technologies. The implementation factor is visionary. We understand that it is better to e-enable transparently than to cultivate virtually. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for coping with new action-items? Without action-items, you will lack R&D. Have you ever had to e-enable your functionality? Right now? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. What does it really mean to incubate "holistically"? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think cyber-one-to-one. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B, affiliate-based or to be distributed? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our world-class accounting but our capability to disintermediate. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? We think that most strategic splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for managing unplanned-for biometrics? Think next-generation.