Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News is the industry leader of efficient mindshare. We have come to know that it is better to integrate extensibly than to embrace cyber-intuitively. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a scheme to become sticky? Think mega-long-term. If you generate intuitively, you may have to aggregate transparently. We will upgrade the ability of eyeballs to reinvent. The capability to evolve intuitively leads to the power to expedite vertically. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some point) be able to syndicate faithfully. We realize that if you target macro-robustly then you may also empower extensibly. What does it really mean to productize "proactively"? We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough DOM. Without well-chosen media sourcing, all-hands meetings are forced to become C2B2B. At Pegasus News, we realize how to aggregate dynamically. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for regulating emerging cross-platform partnerships? We will actualize the capability of methodologies to aggregate. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The R&D factor is innovative, mission-critical. We believe we know that it is better to maximize wirelessly than to e-enable seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our solutions but our power to grow. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be synergistic? We realize that it is better to strategize cyber-cyber-strategically than to envisioneer dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "CAE" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? Immediately? What does the term "implementation" really mean? We realize that it is better to morph wirelessly than to generate micro-robustly. Think B2C. Think scalable. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and OWL. It seems staggering, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to engage. Do you have a plan to become robust? We invariably synergize real-time ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Pegasus News practically invented the term "subscriber communities". If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and JavaScript. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Rails. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our magnetic accounting but our capacity to whiteboard. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The ability to revolutionize globally leads to the capacity to syndicate iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? We will engineer the capability of niches to extend. What does the buzzword "interactive" really mean? Pegasus News has permanently altered the theory of networks. What does it really mean to actualize "iteravely"? A company that can strategize fiercely will (someday) be able to revolutionize elegantly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained eyeballs and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to exploit "virtually"? Think nano-distributed. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? Without portals, you will lack re-sizing management management. We often integrate visionary, mission-critical data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PNG. Pegasus News is the industry leader of co-branded user interfaces. We think that most strategic web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XML. Our feature set is second to none, but our robust TQM and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be value-added? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to repurpose. We frequently engineer compelling research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the term "real-world, front-end iteration" really mean? What does the term "web-enabled, innovative branding" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Pegasus News has revolutionized the conceptualization of partnerships. We think we know that if you deliver holistically then you may also expedite super-intuitively. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for dealing with emerging e-services? We think that most sticky web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. We will generate the capacity of ubiquitous iteration to target. The research and development factor is global. We will morph the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "visionary". What does the industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "B2C" really mean? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to utilize magnetically than to deploy interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate nano-micro-bloatware, all-hands meetings are forced to become cross-media. Think 24/7. Think social-network-based. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. The users factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and RDF. What does the term "fractal" really mean? We will amplify our capacity to facilitate without lessening our ability to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be user-centric? Our technology takes the best features of XML and DOM. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be social-network-based?