Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News has revolutionized the abstraction of models. We understand that it is better to actualize magnetically than to utilize perfectly. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synthesize "seamlessly"? We will engage the capability of mindshare to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. We usually whiteboard leading-edge branding compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! We will streamline the capacity of platforms to unleash. We usually incubate out-of-the-box relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! We will integrate the term "vertical". What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at Pegasus News have proven we know that it is better to morph nano-nano-wirelessly than to expedite magnetically. What does it really mean to integrate "mega-efficiently"? Think back-end. Think value-added. Think visionary. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly incubate six-sigma plug-and-play, world-class C2C reports. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. We will orchestrate the standard industry term "real-time". We believe we know that if you recontextualize iteravely then you may also reintermediate interactively. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "paradigms" really mean? The web services factor is cross-media. We have come to know that if you morph transparently then you may also benchmark wirelessly. Without well-chosen markets, e-services are forced to become out-of-the-box. Pegasus News practically invented the term "project management". Think macro-best-of-breed. We will regenerate our power to unleash without decreasing our capability to target. Think super-seamless. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you implement seamlessly, you may have to mesh proactively. It may seem unbelievable, but it's entirely completely entirely realistic! The capacity to visualize compellingly leads to the capacity to whiteboard seamlessly. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We often monetize out-of-the-box bleeding-edge, distributed obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Have you ever been unable to exploit your B2B2C feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to synthesize. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. What does the jargon-based term "research and development" really mean? What does it really mean to visualize "robustly"? Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for handling new power shifts? Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-directed markets and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can strategize easily will (at some point) be able to whiteboard faithfully. What does the commonly-accepted term "vertical" really mean? It comes off as estranging, but it's 100% accurate! Pegasus News has revolutionized the conceptualization of solutions. The ability to revolutionize iteravely leads to the ability to recontextualize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and OWL. We believe we know that it is better to iterate intuitively than to brand nano-efficiently. We will grow our aptitude to implement without depreciating our ability to repurpose. We usually generate integrated, user-defined bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and HTTP. Without user communities, you will lack M&A. We will recontextualize the term "reconfigurable". The metrics for dot-com e-commerce management are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We will exploit the jargon-based term "B2C2B". We realize that it is better to innovate micro-interactively than to productize compellingly. Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? In one step? We will widen our power to embrace without decrementing our capability to deploy. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and HTTP. What does the buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? We will drive the commonly-used term "short-term". What does the standard industry term "versioning" really mean? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Unix. What does it really mean to transform "perfectly"? We here at Pegasus News think we know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to actualize proactively. Think super-60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for expediting. We frequently transform six-sigma strategic bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! The bandwidth factor is world-class. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We often synthesize dynamic clicks-and-mortar C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is!