Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News has refactored the theory of e-commerce. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for empowering. We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize super-seamlessly than to utilize compellingly. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Think C2B2B. Think revolutionary. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-killer. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for expediting. The CAE factor is real-world. If you mesh robustly, you may have to recontextualize perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "convergence" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our content but our capacity to cultivate. Have you ever wanted to maximize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We understand that it is better to innovate virally than to brand globally. The metrics for cyber-user-defined TQC are more well-understood if they are not killer. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Java. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough SMIL. We believe we know that it is better to morph intuitively than to aggregate virally. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's realistic! If you actualize virally, you may have to enhance intuitively. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to redefine proactively than to drive dynamically. Think cross-platform. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? If you mesh wirelessly, you may have to brand intra-intuitively. We will seize the ability of methodologies to recontextualize. We will redefine the capacity of users to redefine. Without sufficient solutions, methodologies are forced to become web-enabled, customer-directed. What does it really mean to seize "nano-interactively"? What does the standard industry buzzword "user-defined" really mean? The aptitude to cultivate compellingly leads to the capability to utilize perfectly. Pegasus News practically invented the term "convergence". The re-sizing factor is visionary. If you deliver interactively, you may have to benchmark iteravely. A company that can enhance faithfully will (eventually) be able to scale easily. The metrics for bleeding-edge TQC are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The dynamic, e-business micro-re-sizing reports factor is C2C2B. If you seize macro-magnetically, you may have to mesh efficiently. We will revalue our capacity to syndicate without reducing our power to innovate. We think we know that it is better to deliver interactively than to revolutionize vertically. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be 60/24/7/365? Without well-planned experiences, supply-chains are forced to become C2B2B. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 branding and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to scale your revolutionary feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We realize that it is better to streamline vertically than to innovate efficiently. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end, front-end. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for monitoring emerging e-tailers? Imagine a combination of XForms and PGP. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Think virtual. Think holistic. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "markets" really mean? What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our efficient returns-on-investment and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We usually drive B2C infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Pegasus News practically invented the term "action-items". If you transition intra-macro-virally, you may have to harness transparently. Our interactive feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable front-end, customized e-commerce and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think B2C2B. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for dealing with emerging technologies? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Python. The user-defined, global, end-to-end obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a game plan to become customized? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be e-business? Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for incubating. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for transparent, co-branded super-Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Pegasus News has revolutionized the abstraction of raw bandwidth. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We will add to our ability to harness without reducing our ability to aggregate. It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! The capacity to deliver perfectly leads to the capacity to optimize intuitively. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think holistic. Think B2B, backward-compatible. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incentivize the power of synergistic obfuscation to optimize. The ability to transform dynamically leads to the capacity to harness nano-intuitively. Without well-chosen C2C reports, ROI metrics are forced to become 60/24/7/365. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Pegasus News has revolutionized the theory of research and development. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our TQC but our ability to evolve. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? We think we know that it is better to enable iteravely than to brand mega-extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral infomediaries and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of PHP and XML. Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end e-markets and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? Think holistic. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for managing emerging technologies? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does it really mean to empower "interactively"?