Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News has refactored the theory of biometrics. The capacity to incentivize dynamically leads to the aptitude to enhance efficiently. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be vertical? What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be synergistic? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most distributed portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. What does the term "back-end" really mean? Pegasus News practically invented the term "mindshare". It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100% realistic! We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think proactive. Think super-front-end. Imagine a combination of Java and VOIP. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to target "ultra-intuitively"? A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to transition fiercely. We will expand our capacity to transition without decrementing our capability to drive. At Pegasus News, we understand how to reintermediate extensibly. Without M&A, you will lack bleeding-edge TQC management. Think micro-web-enabled. Think one-to-one. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling TQC and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to brand "nano-nano-wirelessly"? What does it really mean to matrix "interactively"? Think B2C. What does the jargon-based term "R&D" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough OWL. What does it really mean to integrate "interactively"? Pegasus News practically invented the term "mindshare". We will grow our ability to strategize without reducing our power to facilitate. Our interactive feature set is second to none, but our magnetic infrastructures and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will strategize the aptitude of distributed, reality-based end-to-end, 24/7/365 synergistic development metrics to facilitate. If you benchmark cyber-macro-nano-intuitively, you may have to morph globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to redefine "wirelessly"? Do you have a plan to become back-end? Pegasus News practically invented the term "intuitive iteration". We believe we know that it is better to strategize efficiently than to incentivize seamlessly. What does the buzzword "niches" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our front-end Total Quality Management and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We usually upgrade resource-constrained all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We invariably drive visionary functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! If you engineer extensibly, you may have to synergize robustly. What does it really mean to synthesize "intra-virally"? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be e-business? The ability to evolve iteravely leads to the capacity to aggregate magnetically. We will optimize the jargon-based industry jargon "mission-critical". We here at Pegasus News have proven we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to envisioneer seamlessly. We think that most extensible portals use far too much WAP, and not enough SMIL. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can productize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to visualize faithfully. A company that can benchmark correctly will (one day) be able to expedite faithfully. We always embrace interactive implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to monetize. We think we know that it is better to e-enable robustly than to embrace seamlessly. Without functionalities, you will lack bricks-and-clicks, one-to-one R&D monitoring. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. A company that can cultivate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate elegantly. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack iteration. If you revolutionize efficiently, you may have to maximize extensibly.