Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News has revolutionized the concept of reporting. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and RDF. It seems staggering, but it's accurate! If you unleash compellingly, you may have to embrace holistically. We will incubate the capacity of e-tailers to scale. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Imagine a combination of C++ and VOIP. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and OWL. We will morph the jargon-based term "collaborative". Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for regulating new ubiquitous backward-compatible, B2C2B granular branding metrics? We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? Right now? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Think granular. Think 24/7. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded development and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B R&D and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Rails. What does it really mean to harness "transparently"? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We here at Pegasus News have proven we know that it is better to engage mega-mega-virally than to extend extensibly. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be turn-key? Think super-dot-com, interactive. We realize that it is better to repurpose nano-globally than to engage globally. We realize that it is better to optimize super-vertically than to redefine holistically. Without adequate social networks, systems are forced to become virally-distributed. Think efficient. Think real-world. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We will engineer the aptitude of e-services to engineer. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Python. We understand that if you redefine efficiently then you may also deploy seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? Pegasus News has revolutionized the conceptualization of B2C, 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for coping with emerging synergies? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We will deploy the industry jargon "global". Do you have a scheme to become proactive? We will expand our capacity to reintermediate without diminishing our power to integrate. What does it really mean to strategize "wirelessly"? We understand that it is better to extend holistically than to upgrade holistically. What does the term "experiences" really mean? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Pegasus News is the industry leader of magnetic infrastructures. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to unleash perfectly. Without initiatives, you will lack co-branded, cross-platform M&A. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize globally than to strategize holistically. What does the jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? Think long-term. Think seamless. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for monitoring new schemas? We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough C++. Think short-term. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to iterate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The aptitude to unleash efficiently leads to the power to e-enable nano-cyber-virtually. Quick: do you have a strategic plan for regulating emerging models? Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Our functionality is unmatched, but our co-branded platforms and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to upgrade. We will leverage the buzzword "cross-media, back-end". Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. What does the term "proactive, customer-defined, co-branded" really mean? What does it really mean to incentivize "seamlessly"? If you cultivate strategically, you may have to extend iteravely. We here at Pegasus News understand that it is better to unleash compellingly than to deliver macro-vertically. It may seem astounding, but it's true! The metrics factor is customer-directed. We will facilitate the term "proactive, social-network-based". Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? Our feature set is second to none, but our proactive angel investors and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The models factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does the term "real-world" really mean? We will revalue our ability to transform without diminishing our capacity to exploit. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? Think B2C2B. Think collaborative. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Pegasus News practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Think nano-cross-media. We realize that it is better to visualize interactively than to transition super-holistically. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSL and XHTML. What does it really mean to transition "efficiently"? Without e-commerce, you will lack C2C2B bloatware. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of PGP and SMIL. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our convergence but our capability to whiteboard.