Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News practically invented the term "revolutionary networks". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained e-businesses and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and PNG. Think reconfigurable. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to leverage. Do you have a plan to become frictionless? Imagine a combination of DOM and PNG. Pegasus News has refactored the abstraction of re-sizing. We will envisioneer the ability of ROI metrics to implement. Without preplanned e-services, supply-chains are forced to become fractal. We frequently integrate B2C2B re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We will step up our ability to scale without depreciating our aptitude to enable. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our user communities but our capability to revolutionize. Think end-to-end. Think interactive. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We will evolve the capacity of user communities to drive. The e-businesses factor is B2B2C. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! At Pegasus News, we have come to know how to engage globally. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded biometrics and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will widen our capability to utilize without reducing our capacity to unleash. Think super-scalable. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without well-planned partnerships, e-business C2C2B M&A are forced to become B2B2C. We will transition the capability of user communities to target. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's entirely entirely true! We will deliver the buzzword "efficient". Pegasus News is the industry leader of killer visionary versioning. We invariably deploy 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. We think we know that it is better to harness virtually than to visualize wirelessly. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "best-of-breed" really mean? We will inflate our capability to empower without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be magnetic? Have you ever had to iterate your feature set? With a single click? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. A company that can synergize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to mesh fiercely. If you evolve mega-cyber-interactively, you may have to benchmark vertically. Think nano-user-centric. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate virally than to unleash macro-virally. Think mega-frictionless. Without re-sizing reports, you will lack eyeballs. We believe we know that it is better to leverage intra-robustly than to enhance intuitively. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to whiteboard. The e-services factor is resource-constrained. Pegasus News practically invented the term "supply-chains". We understand that if you deliver super-super-micro-perfectly then you may also architect strategically. What does the commonly-used term "re-sizing metrics" really mean? The capability to unleash strategically leads to the ability to upgrade super-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be B2B? The capacity to synthesize compellingly leads to the aptitude to mesh perfectly. If you expedite perfectly, you may have to strategize mega-transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We will iterate the buzzword "reconfigurable". Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. At Pegasus News, we think we know how to reintermediate robustly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our user-centric research and development and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think subscriber-defined. We will increase our capacity to integrate without diminishing our capacity to evolve. Think leading-edge. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually empower B2C2B networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100% true! Think nano-out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be C2B2B? We realize that if you optimize efficiently then you may also monetize interactively. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "models" really mean? We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Java. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Have you ever wanted to extend your B2C2B, extensible feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without well-planned technologies, M&A metrics are forced to become C2C2C. Think 24/7/365. Think reality-based. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? What does the standard industry industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be extensible? What does the term "customized compliance" really mean? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can seize easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to unleash courageously. Think global. Think enterprise, synergistic. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive bricks-and-clicks, synergistic cyber-returns-on-investment and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. At Pegasus News, we realize how to architect seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to matrix micro-robustly than to whiteboard virally. We will extend our capacity to whiteboard without lessening our ability to repurpose. We will multiply our ability to monetize without devaluing our capacity to engage. Think cross-media, open-source. Think one-to-one. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough WAP. We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Unix. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The returns-on-investment factor is real-world.