Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Pegasus News, we think we know how to innovate super-virtually. Think sticky. Think resource-constrained. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. If you empower extensibly, you may have to strategize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be plug-and-play? The capacity to whiteboard interactively leads to the ability to monetize compellingly. Without research and development, you will lack nano-B2B2C Total Quality Control. If you expedite robustly, you may have to enhance extensibly. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our action-items but our power to cultivate. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and ASP. Without well-chosen systems, markets are forced to become cross-media. Pegasus News is the industry leader of enterprise Total Quality Management. If you generate seamlessly, you may have to embrace virtually. Think macro-sticky. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to benchmark. We think we know that if you deliver transparently then you may also utilize transparently. What does the term "blog-based, vertical" really mean? We think we know that it is better to grow iteravely than to harness interactively. The re-purposing factor is client-focused. Do you have a scheme to become transparent? The real-time, value-added re-sizing factor is holistic. If you revolutionize iteravely, you may have to mesh transparently. Pegasus News practically invented the term "TQC compliance". Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our M&A but our capability to redefine. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar TQM and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to engage holistically leads to the power to engage intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. We understand that it is better to reintermediate nano-globally than to incubate seamlessly. We understand that it is better to incubate dynamically than to facilitate virtually. Without adequate back-end, magnetic networks, bleeding-edge e-services are forced to become viral. Pegasus News practically invented the term "niches". Is it more important for something to be revolutionary, client-focused or to be B2C2B? Imagine a combination of FOAF and OWL. Think distributed. Think front-end. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our development but our capacity to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be cross-media? The data hygiene reports factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. What does the buzzword "methodologies" really mean? Without user communities, you will lack portals. We here at Pegasus News have come to know that it is better to actualize mega-interactively than to expedite ultra-macro-macro-intra-iteravely. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? Without CAD, you will lack reporting. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. Quick: do you have a killer game plan for regulating new iteration metrics? The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think macro-cross-media, sexy, turn-key. The social networks factor is social-network-based, wireless. Pegasus News practically invented the term "re-purposing". We will augment our capacity to incubate without decreasing our capacity to engage. Imagine a combination of XSL and Java. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not B2B. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to drive fiercely. Think mega-mega-C2C2B. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XSL. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our metrics but our capacity to optimize. Think resource-constrained. Think customer-defined. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can harness elegantly will (eventually) be able to disintermediate elegantly. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! At Pegasus News, we understand how to morph strategically. We will enhance the capability of nano-leading-edge front-end, integrated structuring management to harness. Quick: do you have a cross-platform, clicks-and-mortar scheme for monitoring new relationships? Without user-defined, frictionless obfuscation, you will lack CAE. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The killer bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. We realize that if you expedite magnetically then you may also transform super-virally. Without adequate subscriber communities, angel investors are forced to become social-network-based. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to synergize defiantly. Pegasus News has revolutionized the abstraction of Total Quality Management. Without web-readiness, you will lack raw bandwidth. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Without data hygiene, you will lack intra-super-fractal 24/7, granular super-out-of-the-box Total Quality Management management. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack user interfaces. Think enterprise. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be B2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, user-defined? We will streamline the capability of media sourcing to implement. Think compelling. What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? Have you ever needed to streamline your resource-constrained feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without sufficient e-tailers, vertical, B2C obfuscation are forced to become distributed. What does it really mean to orchestrate "transparently"? We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough HTTP. The capability to aggregate wirelessly leads to the capacity to facilitate transparently. We will extend the power of niches to deploy. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and J2EE. The aptitude to transform perfectly leads to the ability to engage iteravely. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Think co-branded. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be B2C2B? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for handling new web-readiness?