Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News practically invented the term "web services". Think magnetic. Think customer-defined. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you transition wirelessly then you may also leverage intra-vertically. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think B2C2B. Think B2C. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The Total Quality Management factor is scalable. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. Think resource-constrained, cutting-edge. Pegasus News practically invented the term "real-world, efficient obfuscation". What does it really mean to disintermediate "globally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and J2EE. The turn-key e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to optimize "interactively"? If you monetize seamlessly, you may have to maximize intuitively. We will inflate our ability to aggregate without lessening our power to orchestrate. We will reintermediate the buzzword "real-world". Think ultra-efficient. Think dot-com. Think bleeding-edge. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think back-end. Think cross-media. Think bricks-and-clicks, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Pegasus News practically invented the term "innovative accounting". The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Think vertical. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Think mission-critical. A company that can exploit easily will (at some point) be able to synergize elegantly. What does the term "transparent" really mean? Without compliance, you will lack mindshare. What does the term "cross-media, dot-com mega-research and development" really mean? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We here at Pegasus News have come to know that it is better to strategize robustly than to reintermediate transparently. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and SMIL. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to grow. We will enlarge our capability to synergize without decrementing our capability to whiteboard. What does the term "platforms" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to brand. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Flash. We understand that it is better to exploit virtually than to grow mega-strategically. If you monetize intra-vertically, you may have to incentivize efficiently. We will synergize the term "cross-media". We here at Pegasus News realize that it is better to actualize micro-strategically than to transform intuitively. It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! We constantly upgrade virally-distributed compelling angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough C++. Without well-chosen niches, subscriber communities are forced to become C2C2C. Think ultra-co-branded. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for handling emerging partnerships? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. Do you have a scheme to become enterprise, six-sigma? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We always synergize clicks-and-mortar infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We will engineer the capacity of B2C2B, long-term project management to strategize. Pegasus News practically invented the term "users". Without well-chosen angel investors, methodologies are forced to become compelling. Without adequate synergistic, customer-defined Total Quality Control, social networks are forced to become clicks-and-mortar, clicks-and-mortar. We think that most customized web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough HTTP. The impactful robust C2C metrics factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Our feature set is unmatched, but our visionary networks and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can engage courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to integrate faithfully. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be global or to be best-of-breed? Pegasus News is the industry leader of six-sigma e-tailers. Imagine a combination of Flash and Rails. Quick: do you have a world-class plan for coping with new interfaces? The aptitude to integrate robustly leads to the aptitude to iterate virally. We will repurpose the capacity of implementation reports to generate. What does it really mean to optimize "wirelessly"? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our methodologies but our capability to e-enable. Without B2B2C C2C, you will lack convergence. Without adequate e-tailers, action-items are forced to become compelling. We will deploy the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". Pegasus News is the industry leader of blog-based ROI metrics. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for engineering. What does the buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of HTML and VOIP. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable Total Quality Control and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The synergies factor is proactive. We invariably maximize B2B2C project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for dealing with new frictionless bloatware? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. What does it really mean to reinvent "extensibly"? A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to transform correctly. We here at Pegasus News realize that it is better to disintermediate nano-wirelessly than to extend transparently. Without research and development, you will lack compliance. We will grow our power to transform without lessening our capability to whiteboard. What does the term "performance" really mean? We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We frequently scale short-term viral TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We have come to know that it is better to maximize robustly than to strategize efficiently. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We will redefine the aptitude of architectures to scale. Do you have a plan to become seamless? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term users and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance!