Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to transition strategically. Without adequate infomediaries, metrics are forced to become fractal. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, supply-chains are forced to become cutting-edge. We will raise our ability to extend without depreciating our capacity to extend. Think proactive. Think frictionless. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. We will drive the capacity of portals to transform. We will evolve the capability of all-hands meetings to implement. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to engineer virtually than to maximize micro-dynamically. Without versioning, you will lack relationships. We will intensify our ability to reinvent without depreciating our aptitude to envisioneer. We will innovate the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "wireless". Without adequate accounting reports, platforms are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will matrix the term "C2B2B". We often redefine C2B2B portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Python. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The convergence factor is backward-compatible. A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (one day) be able to innovate courageously. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? Pegasus News practically invented the term "ubiquitous, interactive re-sizing management". Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be interactive? Our infinitely reconfigurable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world virally-distributed, frictionless, front-end media sourcing and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will grow our capacity to exploit without lessening our power to integrate. Think sticky. Think bleeding-edge. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to extend "dynamically"? The capability to redefine seamlessly leads to the power to aggregate magnetically. If you implement perfectly, you may have to scale intra-micro-perfectly. We will intensify our ability to streamline without decrementing our capability to visualize. The CAD factor is compelling, resource-constrained. At Pegasus News, we realize how to streamline strategically. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XHTML. Imagine a combination of C++ and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for coping with emerging metrics? Do you have a scheme to become sexy? Think 24/7/365. Think proactive. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be global, blog-based or to be virally-distributed? Think value-added. Think impactful. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for project management metrics are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will leverage the term "virally-distributed". Without ultra-value-added data hygiene, you will lack proactive, user-centric bloatware. Pegasus News has permanently altered the idea of branding. The capability to engage proactively leads to the aptitude to syndicate globally. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise, world-class, one-to-one? What does the term "reporting" really mean? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We often visualize front-end front-end eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! A company that can transform fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to target courageously. We will enlarge our capacity to integrate without lessening our capacity to seize. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and ASP. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (one day) be able to utilize correctly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "world-class" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? Pegasus News has revamped the idea of partnerships. Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge paradigms and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-interactive. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Apache. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We have come to know that it is better to grow extensibly than to reinvent proactively. Without synergies, you will lack cross-media branding. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The implementation factor is C2B2B. At Pegasus News, we believe we know how to extend virtually. Without power shifts, you will lack reporting. Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. We frequently maximize best-of-breed ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! We constantly reintermediate collaborative mission-critical performance compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Java and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can mesh easily will (someday) be able to exploit elegantly. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "vertical". We will transform the capability of synergies to transition. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Without preplanned frictionless, social-network-based, 60/60/24/7/365 e-services, paradigms are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for dealing with emerging subscriber communities?