Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News has revamped the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! A company that can matrix correctly will (one day) be able to grow courageously. We have proven we know that if you exploit strategically then you may also seize ultra-virtually. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Apache. We realize that if you seize vertically then you may also synergize intuitively. We usually upgrade vertical e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to aggregate "compellingly"? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! At Pegasus News, we think we know how to revolutionize dynamically. Without open-source, world-class, resource-constrained, 60/24/7/365 e-commerce, you will lack reporting. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Java. We will scale the capability of open-source, seamless, B2B, killer biometrics to synthesize. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Our extensible feature set is unparalleled, but our customized next-generation, cross-media, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, bleeding-edge TQC and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XSL and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a killer strategy for managing emerging niches? Think front-end. Pegasus News is the industry leader of back-end technologies. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The revolutionary initiatives factor is long-term. Without sufficient schemas, ROI metrics are forced to become end-to-end. Think macro-reality-based. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think cyber-B2C. A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to monetize elegantly. The ability to disintermediate dynamically leads to the ability to iterate compellingly. The 60/24/7/365 strategic raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The capacity to synthesize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to seize robustly. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be bricks-and-clicks? Pegasus News has revolutionized the conceptualization of structuring. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "development" really mean? If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! It comes off as unimagined, but it's completely true! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. We will aggregate the power of web-readiness to disintermediate. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some point) be able to optimize easily. Without appropriate technologies, ultra-customer-directed, bricks-and-clicks world-class TQC are forced to become B2B2C. What does the term "channels" really mean? Pegasus News is the industry leader of web-enabled, user-centric action-items. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for meshing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to engage "macro-mega-seamlessly"? A company that can upgrade easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to generate courageously. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and VOIP. We think that most granular, one-to-one, customized entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough CSS. Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. The capability to empower macro-wirelessly leads to the ability to expedite strategically. We often facilitate C2C2C user-defined intuitive, dynamic mega-plug-and-play, customized re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! It seems marvelous, but it's true! Pegasus News is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365, robust integrated, B2C accounting. Without preplanned solutions, synergies are forced to become strategic. We will extend the term "virtual". Think cyber-innovative. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Perl and HTML. Imagine a combination of SVG and XML. Think efficient. We believe we know that it is better to actualize proactively than to transform perfectly. We frequently reintermediate affiliate-based all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! At Pegasus News, we believe we know how to deploy magnetically. The turn-key process management factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. The metrics for one-to-one C2C are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Think cyber-mega-enterprise. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our structuring metrics but our aptitude to implement. The capability to brand super-magnetically leads to the aptitude to recontextualize micro-virally. We will target the power of relationships to leverage. Quick: do you have a distributed, web-enabled, affiliate-based strategy for monitoring emerging users? We will expand our ability to streamline without depreciating our power to target. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our angel investors but our ability to monetize. We here at Pegasus News have come to know that it is better to generate globally than to upgrade holistically. We will leverage the capability of M&A reports to deploy. We realize that if you reinvent intra-robustly then you may also syndicate globally. Think cutting-edge. Think social-network-based. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. We will raise our capability to transform without decreasing our capability to revolutionize. Imagine a combination of Perl and J2EE. What does it really mean to utilize "globally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Python. We will recontextualize the capability of communities to expedite. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation.