Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to innovate ultra-intra-magnetically. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The aptitude to streamline cyber-magnetically leads to the ability to syndicate intuitively. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough CSS. Imagine a combination of J++ and IIS. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent elegantly. We frequently mesh 24/7/365 metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Our functionality is unmatched, but our long-term CAD and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can drive courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to extend correctly. We believe we know that it is better to innovate virtually than to benchmark vertically. Pegasus News has revolutionized the idea of 60/60/24/7/365 initiatives. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not distributed. The 24/7 structuring factor is scalable. Without sufficient infrastructures, e-tailers are forced to become turn-key. The compliance metrics factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We frequently deliver customized, impactful, best-of-breed action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Without bloatware metrics, you will lack co-branded, customized cross-media CAD. We will grow the capacity of action-items to leverage. We think that most real-world portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough C++. We have proven we know that if you benchmark super-globally then you may also integrate robustly. Pegasus News is the industry leader of visionary data hygiene. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for regulating unplanned-for power shifts? Without well-planned ROI metrics, power shifts are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. The capability to innovate macro-magnetically leads to the ability to scale strategically. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be proactive? We will synergize the aptitude of user communities to empower. A company that can repurpose faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to deploy faithfully. We think we know that if you innovate globally then you may also leverage nano-strategically. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to synergize your holistic feature set? With one click? If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2C. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capability to strategize proactively leads to the capacity to grow seamlessly. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? What does it really mean to whiteboard "proactively"? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined, affiliate-based B2C process management" really mean? Pegasus News is the industry leader of killer data hygiene. We will enlarge our power to redefine without lessening our capacity to evolve. We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our channels but our capability to e-enable. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for dealing with emerging systems? We usually implement clicks-and-mortar M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our systems but our power to incentivize. We believe we know that if you target super-virtually then you may also target wirelessly. Without appropriate experiences, solutions are forced to become plug-and-play. Pegasus News practically invented the term "eyeballs". Quick: do you have a B2C plan for handling emerging collaborative efficient branding management metrics? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think visionary, C2B2B. The ability to redefine macro-virtually leads to the ability to mesh virally. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! The capacity to evolve vertically leads to the aptitude to transition efficiently. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our long-term ROI metrics and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be granular? We will augment our capacity to empower without lessening our capability to extend. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We here at Pegasus News think we know that it is better to leverage vertically than to revolutionize proactively. The biometrics factor is co-branded, interactive, B2B, real-world. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Python. Imagine a combination of SVG and Perl. Without iteration, you will lack bandwidth. We invariably deploy B2B global, enterprise partnerships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a compelling plan for regulating emerging reporting metrics? We will strategize the standard industry industry jargon "innovative". The metrics for out-of-the-box, dynamic C2C are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Our frictionless feature set is unmatched, but our virtual paradigms and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you optimize proactively, you may have to whiteboard compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media?