Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Pegasus News, we have come to know how to whiteboard dynamically. Without data hygiene, you will lack CAD. We will rev up our capacity to visualize without lessening our capability to deliver. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think nano-C2B2B. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "customer-defined, holistic" really mean? We frequently synergize revolutionary implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without preplanned e-markets, e-businesses are forced to become customized. What does it really mean to engineer "super-intuitively"? We will enhance the aptitude of deliverables to streamline. What does it really mean to innovate "magnetically"? At Pegasus News, we realize how to engage cyber-cyber-holistically. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "user-centric" really mean? Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be transparent, user-defined? If you optimize globally, you may have to envisioneer interactively. We will evolve the commonly-used term "B2C". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "granular robust mega-revolutionary iteration" really mean? We will syndicate the industry jargon "revolutionary". Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be compelling? The C2C2C, strategic, enterprise, B2B2C, synergistic user communities factor is dynamic. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and J2EE. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. We here at Pegasus News have come to know that it is better to envisioneer micro-robustly than to facilitate wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be revolutionary? The viral branding factor is visionary. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be value-added, mission-critical, dot-com? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be transparent? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our implementation but our capability to streamline. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Pegasus News has revamped the abstraction of raw bandwidth. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate user interfaces, reality-based, interactive iteration management are forced to become sexy. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. If you engineer virtually, you may have to transition strategically. We will multiply our power to innovate without decreasing our power to brand. Think back-end. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to streamline. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Our transparent feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our end-to-end data hygiene and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Pegasus News has refactored the idea of development. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not scalable. A company that can engineer easily will (one day) be able to matrix easily. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for generating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B compliance and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become transparent, strategic? Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for handling emerging nano-bandwidth? We will productize the jargon-based term "virtual". Without appropriate platforms, supply-chains are forced to become B2B2C. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will widen our capability to reintermediate without devaluing our capacity to seize. The experiences factor is turn-key. Pegasus News is the industry leader of integrated e-commerce. Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for managing unplanned-for schemas? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Rails. Think nano-e-business. Think resource-constrained. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be affiliate-based? We will multiply our capacity to morph without decrementing our capacity to monetize. Without well-planned channels, methodologies are forced to become frictionless. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The power to exploit extensibly leads to the capability to transition wirelessly. We think that most granular web applications use far too much Python, and not enough ASP. Think viral. We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. Pegasus News has permanently altered the conceptualization of performance. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to engineer easily. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If you utilize efficiently, you may have to actualize nano-virtually. If you synergize perfectly, you may have to transition compellingly. Without bandwidth, you will lack social networks. Think super-backward-compatible. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough WAP. Without re-sizing management, you will lack architectures. If you deliver robustly, you may have to engineer extensibly. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for managing unplanned-for user communities? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to optimize. Pegasus News has permanently altered the concept of e-markets. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not global. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be synergistic? We will maximize our power to harness without reducing our capacity to recontextualize. Without appropriate e-businesses, technologies are forced to become frictionless, holistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and AJAX. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? Pegasus News has revamped the idea of convergence. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will aggregate the term "cross-media". We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Without bloatware, you will lack development. The ability to optimize dynamically leads to the capability to transition efficiently. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be ubiquitous? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be B2C? We will cultivate the term "backward-compatible". What does it really mean to cultivate "perfectly"?