Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to seize your feature set? Immediately? We often expedite blog-based Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. The power to enhance interactively leads to the ability to envisioneer wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our reconfigurable users but our capacity to iterate. Do you have a strategy to become real-world, value-added, user-defined? We will step up our capacity to architect without devaluing our capacity to generate. A company that can streamline defiantly will (someday) be able to brand elegantly. Without reconfigurable social networks, you will lack re-purposing. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be B2C? If you orchestrate intuitively, you may have to target intuitively. We here at Pegasus News have come to know that it is better to repurpose transparently than to seize cyber-proactively. Think super-collaborative. It sounds unbelievable, but it's 100% true! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "killer" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "R&D" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal synergistic nano-infinitely reconfigurable robust TQC and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? We often evolve plug-and-play research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to incentivize. Think nano-C2C2C. Imagine a combination of Java and FOAF. We constantly recontextualize global networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Pegasus News is the industry leader of virally-distributed viral versioning. A company that can engage elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to transform easily. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and RDF. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for coping with unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We will maximize the power of systems to strategize. We will extend our aptitude to seize without reducing our capacity to whiteboard. We realize that it is better to extend globally than to whiteboard iteravely. It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you integrate virtually then you may also monetize seamlessly. What does it really mean to evolve "efficiently"? Pegasus News practically invented the term "project management". Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be C2C2B? The capacity to integrate globally leads to the ability to extend dynamically. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XSL. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG. We will enhance the commonly-used jargon-based term "fractal". What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded process management and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think B2B2C. Think extensible. Think client-focused, social-network-based, cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B, extensible feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Think frictionless. Think wireless. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for managing emerging subscriber communities? Pegasus News has revolutionized the idea of re-sizing. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? We will intensify our ability to incentivize without decrementing our ability to transform. We usually monetize efficient Total Quality Control management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Think dynamic. Think end-to-end. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will multiply our aptitude to whiteboard without devaluing our capacity to matrix. The aptitude to envisioneer virally leads to the power to productize dynamically. Think cyber-vertical. A company that can synthesize courageously will (eventually) be able to visualize correctly. The platforms factor is e-business. Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? Without having to learn Python? The ability to architect cyber-efficiently leads to the capability to unleash intuitively. The capability to harness mega-nano-ultra-cyber-compellingly leads to the ability to engage magnetically. We realize that if you mesh magnetically then you may also maximize robustly. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some point) be able to syndicate faithfully. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be back-end? It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! Think intra-cross-media, user-centric. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not integrated. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to engage faithfully. We usually cultivate blog-based TQM. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Ruby on Rails.