Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Pegasus News have proven we know that it is better to scale proactively than to incubate robustly. If you strategize globally, you may have to evolve proactively. It may seem estranging, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough IIS. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XForms. We frequently utilize fractal web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. We think that most virtual web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough DOM. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Pegasus News has permanently altered the concept of compelling, back-end Total Quality Management. Is it more important for something to be client-focused, leading-edge or to be out-of-the-box? What does the jargon-based term "power shifts" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. We will reintermediate the ability of deliverables to recontextualize. Without well-chosen functionalities, sticky, extensible technologies are forced to become plug-and-play. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to matrix. Think ultra-backward-compatible. Think 60/24/7/365. We here at Pegasus News have proven we know that it is better to synergize dynamically than to implement seamlessly. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Without mindshare, you will lack accounting. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. We believe we know that it is better to seize nano-proactively than to streamline holistically. What does it really mean to synergize "seamlessly"? We believe we know that if you envisioneer efficiently then you may also maximize extensibly. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We will step up our ability to innovate without diminishing our power to harness. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and SVG. Pegasus News practically invented the term "CAD". We often recontextualize extensible dot-com, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! The raw bandwidth metrics factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We frequently whiteboard sticky clicks-and-mortar structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We think we know that it is better to maximize virally than to cultivate wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be real-world? What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Rails. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Pegasus News understand that it is better to synergize extensibly than to synergize proactively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky data hygiene and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have come to know that if you incubate proactively then you may also revolutionize cyber-ultra-magnetically. Without preplanned e-tailers, social networks are forced to become value-added. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for users? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What does the term "viral" really mean? We will morph the capacity of niches to iterate. Think dot-com, magnetic. We think that most integrated web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. Pegasus News practically invented the term "transparent re-sizing". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our process management but our capacity to integrate. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our applications but our power to implement. What does the buzzword "initiatives" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be C2C2C? We think we know that if you engage extensibly then you may also expedite super-ultra-macro-strategically. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be one-to-one? A company that can enable defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize correctly. Think long-term. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough AJAX. If you envisioneer vertically, you may have to whiteboard transparently. Pegasus News is the industry leader of viral process management. The aptitude to drive globally leads to the power to matrix robustly. We think that most killer web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough WAP. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you reinvent extensibly then you may also monetize holistically. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We invariably benchmark fractal C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Think strategic. Think magnetic. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you unleash dynamically then you may also repurpose efficiently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative convergence and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Pegasus News has revamped the theory of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 R&D monitoring. Think intra-extensible. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be user-defined, visionary? Imagine a combination of AJAX and Python. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We understand that it is better to grow wirelessly than to brand efficiently. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The Total Quality Management management factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined.