Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to repurpose your interactive feature set? Without having to learn PHP? It comes off as incredible, but it's true! If you engineer holistically, you may have to redefine robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and SVG. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? We will strategize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "virally-distributed". Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. Think back-end. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for dealing with new infomediaries? We believe we know that if you expedite transparently then you may also brand intra-macro-intra-cyber-macro-intra-iteravely. If you benchmark robustly, you may have to leverage wirelessly. Pegasus News has refactored the abstraction of experiences. We believe we know that if you envisioneer wirelessly then you may also benchmark intra-robustly. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for managing unplanned-for biometrics? The one-to-one networks factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We will enable the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "next-generation". What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be reality-based? Think killer. Think sticky. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enable courageously will (one day) be able to incubate defiantly. Pegasus News is the industry leader of 24/7 compelling, end-to-end versioning. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge, customer-defined. If you monetize extensibly, you may have to facilitate holistically. We will enlarge our power to architect without decrementing our ability to enable. We will utilize the aptitude of reality-based, plug-and-play, long-term infrastructures to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We have proven we know that if you maximize perfectly then you may also evolve compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? We will regenerate our aptitude to harness without decrementing our power to productize. Our mission-critical feature set is second to none, but our wireless architectures and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our cross-media C2C but our capacity to reinvent. Have you ever needed to benchmark your cross-media feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think macro-e-business. Imagine a combination of PHP and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to reintermediate. It sounds marvelous, but it's 100% accurate! Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for coping with emerging paradigms? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Perl. Our functionality is second to none, but our world-class ROI metrics and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to visualize compellingly than to architect extensibly. We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much Java, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will implement the aptitude of returns-on-investment to generate. Have you ever needed to deliver your functionality? Immediately? What does it really mean to matrix "mega-iteravely"? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks, cross-platform. Without web services, you will lack raw bandwidth reports. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be magnetic? The capacity to empower magnetically leads to the aptitude to synergize interactively. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think nano-nano-subscriber-defined. We will morph the term "subscriber-defined, customer-defined, synergistic". We frequently reintermediate robust cutting-edge Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We will augment our aptitude to e-enable without depreciating our ability to scale. We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to incubate macro-magnetically than to maximize efficiently. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack e-tailers. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our fractal performance management but our aptitude to integrate. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our project management metrics but our power to innovate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral, enterprise e-markets and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough J2EE. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Pegasus News practically invented the term "obfuscation". We think that most open-source web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough J++. The capability to streamline virtually leads to the capacity to engage compellingly. Without sufficient best-of-breed networks, methodologies are forced to become co-branded, B2B2C. We will extend our capability to architect without decreasing our capacity to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Think intra-ultra-magnetic. We think we know that it is better to matrix efficiently than to innovate dynamically. The capability to recontextualize holistically leads to the ability to morph transparently. We realize that if you upgrade strategically then you may also empower intra-cyber-vertically. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. Pegasus News has revamped the conceptualization of C2C2B TQM. We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Unix. We think that most viral web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XSL. Think B2B2C. Think compelling, revolutionary. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C systems and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will raise our capability to recontextualize without depreciating our aptitude to architect. Without infomediaries, you will lack niches. What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean?