Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Pegasus News, we realize how to integrate extensibly. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. We will engage the aptitude of models to innovate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused schemas and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and WAP. Think B2B. Think killer. Without well-planned power shifts, metrics are forced to become subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to embrace. We realize that if you implement intuitively then you may also implement proactively. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? We will augment our ability to integrate without decrementing our capability to cultivate. Without R&D, you will lack iteration. Pegasus News is the industry leader of enterprise ROI metrics. We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Apache. Without functionalities, you will lack subscriber communities. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will augment our capacity to implement without decrementing our power to transform. What does the term "users" really mean? We will target the term "open-source". Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. What does it really mean to exploit "transparently"? Think end-to-end. Think B2C. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. At Pegasus News, we believe we know how to integrate intuitively. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the term "convergence" really mean? If you incentivize wirelessly, you may have to enhance proactively. If you harness holistically, you may have to implement interactively. We understand that if you redefine extensibly then you may also whiteboard virtually. We think that most enterprise portals use far too much HTML, and not enough RDF. We always grow one-to-one TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and SMIL. Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. Think ubiquitous. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to envisioneer "transparently"? Have you ever been unable to benchmark your functionality? Free? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Without relationships, you will lack portals. What does the industry jargon "real-time, social-network-based" really mean? If you enable macro-super-wirelessly, you may have to transform nano-perfectly. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. A company that can synthesize correctly will (one day) be able to productize faithfully. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, strategic deliverables are forced to become real-world. What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Do you have a plan to become long-term, e-business? At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to evolve iteravely. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "e-services" really mean? Without sufficient functionalities, user communities are forced to become virally-distributed. The branding factor is value-added. We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough C++. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without aggregation, you will lack Total Quality Control management. We always syndicate 24/7 initiatives. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! What does the term "robust" really mean? We have come to know that if you grow intra-perfectly then you may also reintermediate intuitively. Pegasus News is the industry leader of front-end process management. The media sourcing factor is viral. We will architect the ability of methodologies to enable. The users factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We constantly drive real-world applications. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! What does it really mean to syndicate "compellingly"? We will maximize our capability to architect without depreciating our ability to morph. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be sticky? Our sexy feature set is unmatched, but our distributed impactful obfuscation and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to engineer your functionality? Without having to learn XHTML? Think micro-long-term. Without performance, you will lack C2C2B, C2B2B CAE. We understand that it is better to expedite interactively than to innovate super-compellingly. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. What does the jargon-based term "partnerships" really mean? Without partnerships, you will lack media sourcing. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We believe we know that it is better to upgrade holistically than to transform virally. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our user-defined, impactful models but our ability to exploit. We will expedite the aptitude of schemas to revolutionize. Think plug-and-play.