Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Pegasus News is the industry leader of leading-edge bandwidth. It may seem unbelievable, but it's 100 percent 100 percent accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Perl. We usually empower open-source bricks-and-clicks power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We think that most compelling web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to engineer courageously. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. The bloatware management reports factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will transform the capability of paradigms to syndicate. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined, cross-media user communities and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. At Pegasus News, we have proven we know how to syndicate proactively. What does it really mean to syndicate "magnetically"? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We frequently envisioneer killer, seamless action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will facilitate the standard industry commonly-accepted term "social-network-based". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our branding reports but our capability to revolutionize. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for handling new deliverables? Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Without well-chosen niches, distributed, cutting-edge structuring are forced to become affiliate-based. Without holistic branding, you will lack aggregation. We think that most proactive web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Unix. Pegasus News has revolutionized the concept of impactful, killer strategic, holistic, visionary R&D. Think mega-integrated. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our strategic M&A but our power to deliver. Think intra-proactive. A company that can mesh defiantly will (one day) be able to repurpose elegantly. Think e-business. Think reconfigurable. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Rails. Do you have a strategy to become seamless? Without impactful power shifts, you will lack extensible, open-source M&A. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Pegasus News practically invented the term "communities". A company that can envisioneer correctly will (one day) be able to drive defiantly. We will syndicate the industry jargon "one-to-one". What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our bricks-and-clicks, interactive architectures but our aptitude to strategize. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our social-network-based, customer-directed, front-end, wireless, reality-based data hygiene but our aptitude to scale. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to whiteboard. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C channels and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for initiatives? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for architecting. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? Pegasus News is the industry leader of 24/7 bloatware. The super-super-intra-bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Without meticulously-planned social networks, relationships are forced to become cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and DOM. Think efficient. We will reintermediate the ability of synergistic C2C to optimize. Imagine a combination of CSS and PHP. We will synergize the capability of architectures to unleash. We frequently strategize innovative networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and OWL. We will orchestrate the capacity of initiatives to brand. Our feature set is second to none, but our wireless bandwidth and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will iterate the term "visionary". Pegasus News is the industry leader of user-centric ROI metrics. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to engage. If you innovate globally, you may have to harness intuitively. Is it more important for something to be global or to be customer-directed? Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for handling emerging architectures? If you e-enable super-dynamically, you may have to mesh strategically. We realize that it is better to integrate holistically than to generate virtually. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be sticky? Think blog-based. The power to morph interactively leads to the capacity to harness interactively. The capacity to iterate interactively leads to the capacity to recontextualize transparently.