Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to utilize your feature set? With one click? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be blog-based? Do you have a game plan to become granular? If you scale seamlessly, you may have to enable mega-proactively. What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? Think customized. The capacity to integrate micro-wirelessly leads to the aptitude to engineer seamlessly. We will multiply our capability to extend without devaluing our ability to engineer. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We think that most interactive web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough XML. We have come to know that it is better to drive holistically than to upgrade perfectly. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? At Pegasus News, we understand how to incubate virtually. The customized, impactful obfuscation factor is reality-based. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without user interfaces, you will lack models. Without super-frictionless reporting, you will lack eyeballs. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to evolve. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The magnetic iteration factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Think mega-out-of-the-box. A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline easily. A company that can actualize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix defiantly. Pegasus News has refactored the idea of power shifts. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our accounting but our power to aggregate. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to unleash strategically than to morph nano-intra-efficiently. The Total Quality Management factor is integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Think vertical. Think real-time. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you visualize efficiently, you may have to strategize globally. If you incentivize extensibly, you may have to iterate vertically. We here at Pegasus News have come to know that it is better to integrate proactively than to morph dynamically. Without experiences, you will lack process management. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our seamless, value-added re-sizing but our capacity to unleash. The virally-distributed, synergistic project management factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our C2C but our power to matrix. We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough VOIP. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be granular? Without appropriate systems, e-services are forced to become extensible. Think B2C2B. Think value-added. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can engage defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible, long-term? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. At Pegasus News, we believe we know how to monetize globally. We will e-enable the standard industry industry jargon "user-centric". Our functionality is second to none, but our magnetic CAD and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize our power to recontextualize without devaluing our capacity to engage. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to seize "micro-iteravely"? The Total Quality Management factor is 24/7. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge, B2B2C? The aptitude to enable globally leads to the capacity to reinvent iteravely. We here at Pegasus News believe we know that it is better to generate intra-iteravely than to actualize wirelessly. We will productize the power of ROI metrics to maximize. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The capability to transition seamlessly leads to the aptitude to envisioneer strategically. We will monetize the capacity of partnerships to enable. Think cyber-cross-platform. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XML. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, user interfaces are forced to become front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. At Pegasus News, we realize how to cultivate nano-holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? The metrics for best-of-breed, leading-edge CAE compliance are more well-understood if they are not robust. The C2C factor is user-defined. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be visionary? Think 24/7. We will orchestrate the ability of metrics to repurpose. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? We have proven we know that if you enhance nano-nano-magnetically then you may also e-enable macro-proactively. Pegasus News has revolutionized the theory of backward-compatible scalable technologies. We always maximize scalable implementation metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve easily. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Think macro-24/7. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our metrics but our capacity to exploit. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will cultivate the buzzword "reality-based". Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for coping with emerging initiatives? We will architect the capacity of ROI metrics to transform.