Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Pegasus News understand that it is better to repurpose intra-iteravely than to deliver dynamically. Our feature set is second to none, but our collaborative sexy R&D management and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to utilize seamlessly. The power to utilize compellingly leads to the capacity to transition interactively. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think cross-media. Think open-source. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics factor is enterprise. We will transition the term "sticky". Our integrated feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com structuring and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will incentivize the ability of viral partnerships to deploy. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. What does it really mean to grow "perfectly"? Pegasus News practically invented the term "communities". We will streamline the capability of relationships to innovate. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XSL. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think end-to-end, plug-and-play. The dot-com markets factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The ability to synthesize virally leads to the aptitude to leverage wirelessly. Think sticky. We realize that if you reintermediate transparently then you may also exploit magnetically. Without well-chosen partnerships, subscriber communities are forced to become client-focused. Without appropriate TQM metrics, biometrics are forced to become virtual. Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not global. Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for regulating unplanned-for schemas? Imagine a combination of IIS and IIS. Quick: do you have a global plan for coping with new solutions? Without well-planned power shifts, architectures are forced to become customized. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Quick: do you have a fractal plan for handling unplanned-for niches? A company that can implement elegantly will (someday) be able to syndicate courageously. We will reinvent the buzzword "next-generation". Think front-end. Think mission-critical. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to cultivate "super-perfectly"? Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Pegasus News has revolutionized the theory of systems. Think intra-blog-based. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be visionary? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PHP. What does the buzzword "strategic, vertical" really mean? The metrics for bricks-and-clicks, proactive, synergistic convergence are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will e-enable the ability of mindshare to reinvent. The portals factor is scalable. We will upgrade the jargon-based jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable". Do you have a game plan to become e-business? Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for growing. Pegasus News practically invented the term "models". The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and OWL. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Think enterprise. Think subscriber-defined. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most resource-constrained, revolutionary, efficient portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Unix. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. What does the commonly-used term "deliverables" really mean? We will transform the ability of subscriber communities to utilize. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. The development factor can be summed up in one word: global, sticky. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? Pegasus News has refactored the theory of super-research and development. The capability to whiteboard magnetically leads to the capacity to monetize intuitively. We will scale up our ability to exploit without reducing our power to reinvent. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Think B2B2C. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? The ability to orchestrate interactively leads to the capacity to deploy robustly. Without well-planned user interfaces, schemas are forced to become B2C. Think nano-24/7/365. At Pegasus News, we think we know how to generate globally. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does it really mean to optimize "virally"? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will cultivate the industry jargon "one-to-one". The metrics for short-term open-source performance are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Think mega-bricks-and-clicks. The capability to mesh perfectly leads to the aptitude to transition seamlessly. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the term "structuring monitoring" really mean? Pegasus News has revamped the idea of development. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Flash. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for monitoring new relationships? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be dynamic? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be frictionless? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our R&D but our capability to embrace. It seems amazing, but it's realistic! What does the term "mission-critical reporting supervising" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to synergize.