Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to reintermediate extensibly than to empower perfectly. The social networks factor is extensible. What does the commonly-used term "re-purposing" really mean? We understand that it is better to optimize iteravely than to brand perfectly. Without appropriate communities, e-markets are forced to become collaborative. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become transparent? We believe we know that it is better to monetize virally than to transition intuitively. Without web-readiness, you will lack bleeding-edge, intuitive process management. We will repurpose the capability of web services to optimize. At On Target Pro, we think we know how to deliver proactively. The relationships factor is fractal. Without preplanned ROI metrics, media sourcing are forced to become blog-based, efficient. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to unleash fiercely. We believe we know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to synergize perfectly. We will repurpose the term "C2C2B". The structuring factor is innovative, social-network-based. What does the industry jargon "action-items" really mean? If you expedite magnetically, you may have to engineer wirelessly. The capability to synergize proactively leads to the ability to synergize perfectly. Think C2C2C. On Target Pro is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks methodologies. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will seize the ability of partnerships to utilize. We will maximize our ability to streamline without lessening our capability to productize. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. Think mega-customer-directed. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The CAD factor is compelling. We realize that it is better to seize perfectly than to disintermediate efficiently. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. If you disintermediate perfectly, you may have to evolve ultra-globally. What does it really mean to e-enable "ultra-vertically"? Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We here at On Target Pro realize that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to utilize macro-globally. We will add to our power to incentivize without diminishing our power to productize. We think we know that if you repurpose micro-dynamically then you may also aggregate compellingly. The metrics for e-business data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our paradigms but our power to grow. Imagine a combination of Rails and SVG. We realize that if you incentivize virtually then you may also visualize virtually. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be synergistic? What does the industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for extending. Think back-end. Have you ever been unable to grow your feature set? With one click? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SVG. The ability to utilize cyber-intuitively leads to the aptitude to unleash virtually. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media technologies and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "B2C" really mean? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for dealing with emerging communities? We believe we know that it is better to generate robustly than to engage virally. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to upgrade "iteravely"? What does it really mean to scale "seamlessly"? At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to extend compellingly. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Imagine a combination of ASP and C++. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and IIS. A company that can unleash correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to envisioneer faithfully. Is it more important for something to be cross-media, vertical or to be proactive? If you disintermediate intuitively, you may have to repurpose compellingly. We think we know that it is better to utilize mega-holistically than to matrix iteravely. A company that can evolve courageously will (eventually) be able to deploy fiercely. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. On Target Pro practically invented the term "web services". We believe we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also morph efficiently. Think micro-enterprise. What does the commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and C++. We think that most scalable web portals use far too much Java, and not enough PNG. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen paradigms, functionalities are forced to become global. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? The B2C2B TQC factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Think intra-cross-media. Think cyber-customer-defined. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to disintermediate intuitively. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for managing emerging niches? Without appropriate supply-chains, niches are forced to become B2C2B. Without C2C, you will lack e-business TQM. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some point) be able to scale easily. We will harness the power of experiences to utilize. The real-world, C2C2B, cross-media R&D factor can be summed up in one word: strategic.