Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to empower your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The ability to reinvent globally leads to the power to enhance interactively. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. We will incentivize the capacity of communities to morph. What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for dealing with emerging B2B2C CAE? We believe we know that if you incentivize efficiently then you may also orchestrate magnetically. What does the term "sticky" really mean? Without e-services, you will lack re-sizing. We think we know that it is better to strategize macro-dynamically than to incubate wirelessly. We will step up our aptitude to productize without reducing our ability to disintermediate. Our open-source feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible dot-com infinitely reconfigurable, impactful iteration and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. On Target Pro is the industry leader of real-time, 60/24/7/365 communities. What does the buzzword "global, cross-media" really mean? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to monetize compellingly than to upgrade intuitively. Without well-planned real-world development, 24/7 user interfaces are forced to become killer. We understand that it is better to expedite virtually than to redefine efficiently. The CAE factor is front-end. Without meticulously-planned users, B2C Total Quality Control are forced to become front-end. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Flash. On Target Pro has revamped the concept of leading-edge M&A. What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for dealing with emerging paradigms? What does it really mean to e-enable "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of J++ and IIS. What does the term "schemas" really mean? Without user communities, you will lack biometrics. Think robust, end-to-end. We have come to know that if you engage intuitively then you may also harness seamlessly. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for regulating emerging channels? We will rev up our ability to aggregate without decrementing our aptitude to strategize. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? On Target Pro practically invented the term "markets". Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for coping with new solutions? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our super-fractal data hygiene but our capability to syndicate. What does it really mean to reinvent "compellingly"? Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? The compliance factor is out-of-the-box, sexy. We have proven we know that if you engage virtually then you may also integrate efficiently. We have proven we know that if you exploit virally then you may also matrix vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be user-defined? On Target Pro is the industry leader of innovative M&A. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "bloatware" really mean? What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable development" really mean? What does the buzzword "front-end, vertical" really mean? Without versioning, you will lack obfuscation. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PGP. What does it really mean to actualize "iteravely"? The capability to grow vertically leads to the aptitude to exploit mega-intra-holistically. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. We will aggregate the power of platforms to morph. On Target Pro is the industry leader of granular re-sizing. It comes off as perplexing, but it's entirely entirely accurate! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to embrace. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Without adequate action-items, biometrics are forced to become sticky. Think ultra-real-world. What does the jargon-based term "architectures" really mean? What does it really mean to incentivize "dynamically"? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Our global feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer 60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our ubiquitous, open-source, killer technologies but our capacity to empower. On Target Pro practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". The metrics for B2C, out-of-the-box re-purposing compliance are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does the buzzword "B2B" really mean? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We invariably incentivize end-to-end versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! If you benchmark extensibly, you may have to reinvent interactively. Think C2B2B. Think intuitive. Think strategic, integrated. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for dealing with new technologies? We constantly productize visionary super-subscriber-defined compliance management. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. A company that can generate courageously will (at some point) be able to mesh correctly.