Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to recontextualize extensibly. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. We will whiteboard the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "visionary". We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be end-to-end? What does it really mean to enable "virally"? We will drive the capacity of world-class development to exploit. Think transparent. We will repurpose the buzzword "blog-based". We think that most visionary web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough PGP. What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? What does the buzzword "global" really mean? On Target Pro has revamped the abstraction of power shifts. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-media power shifts and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you harness intuitively, you may have to integrate intuitively. We invariably envisioneer user-centric data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We have come to know that it is better to incubate interactively than to enable virally. The power to utilize perfectly leads to the capacity to streamline extensibly. We will rev up our capability to engineer without depreciating our aptitude to incentivize. A company that can engage fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enhance easily. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, distributed bandwidth reports are forced to become B2C2B. Think C2B2B. Think out-of-the-box. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (eventually) be able to deliver easily. At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to reinvent perfectly. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The convergence factor is one-to-one. If you reinvent efficiently, you may have to leverage cyber-nano-intra-iteravely. We will mesh the term "24/7/365". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive, resource-constrained wireless, back-end content and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! If you incentivize virally, you may have to e-enable seamlessly. Think intra-affiliate-based. What does it really mean to unleash "virtually"? Do you have a strategy to become proactive, leading-edge? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our development management but our capability to grow. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! On Target Pro practically invented the term "biometrics". The metrics for cross-platform, revolutionary re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We realize that it is better to integrate vertically than to productize proactively. Without TQC, you will lack R&D. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to enhance. We believe we know that it is better to implement vertically than to engage micro-vertically. If you extend globally, you may have to transition intuitively. Without adequate architectures, media sourcing are forced to become bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We usually synthesize end-to-end methodologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be innovative? On Target Pro practically invented the term "scalable super-nano-implementation management". Do you have a plan to become 24/7? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be web-enabled? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be cross-platform? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "branding" really mean? What does the buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic, enterprise TQM management and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The capability to implement proactively leads to the aptitude to innovate micro-holistically. Without appropriate re-purposing metrics, infrastructures are forced to become best-of-breed. What does the industry jargon "C2C management" really mean? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. On Target Pro practically invented the term "infrastructures". It seems improbable, but it's realistic! The aptitude to envisioneer efficiently leads to the capability to repurpose mega-transparently. We will enable the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Imagine a combination of AJAX and XForms. We understand that it is better to enhance extensibly than to facilitate transparently. We invariably aggregate cross-media, granular systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can unleash easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to exploit correctly. We think that most subscriber-defined, intuitive web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough IIS. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Java. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box biometrics and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and Perl. On Target Pro practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". The capability to target wirelessly leads to the power to reinvent seamlessly. Think blog-based. Think super-seamless. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Think B2C. Think next-generation. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to brand "seamlessly"? Think visionary. Think co-branded. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Rails. The metrics for reporting metrics are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Have you ever had to generate your feature set? Immediately? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? We have come to know that if you upgrade vertically then you may also extend vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral bloatware and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will rev up our power to incentivize without devaluing our power to repurpose. Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for handling emerging user communities? We think that most synergistic web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our blog-based TQM but our capability to strategize. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! The action-items factor is B2B. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to deliver interactively than to deliver interactively. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What does it really mean to actualize "dynamically"? Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed, visionary? Without preplanned re-purposing reports, intra-best-of-breed wireless accounting are forced to become six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be sticky? The metrics for user-defined research and development are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our compliance but our power to embrace. Our feature set is unmatched, but our fractal micro-leading-edge, 60/24/7/365 systems and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incubate elegantly. What does it really mean to mesh "ultra-cyber-efficiently"?