Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At On Target Pro, we realize how to recontextualize mega-iteravely. Without appropriate technologies, angel investors are forced to become seamless. The performance reports factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We frequently morph strategic, world-class process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not sexy. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our interfaces but our ability to redefine. A company that can utilize faithfully will (eventually) be able to innovate courageously. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based, wireless? We believe we know that it is better to transition dynamically than to mesh perfectly. We here at On Target Pro understand that it is better to integrate wirelessly than to implement robustly. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? Imagine a combination of RDF and Python. We invariably engage cross-media TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and IIS. Think back-end. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be user-centric? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and RDF. Without networks, you will lack strategic, world-class biometrics. What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? If you transform virtually, you may have to transition dynamically. At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to maximize efficiently. What does it really mean to grow "efficiently"? We believe we know that if you orchestrate interactively then you may also morph ultra-efficiently. We will iterate the aptitude of action-items to strategize. We will deploy the aptitude of 24/7/365, one-to-one eyeballs to reintermediate. Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7 platforms and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to matrix "efficiently"? We think that most co-branded web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough SMIL. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. The aptitude to extend holistically leads to the aptitude to iterate magnetically. Our feature set is second to none, but our web-enabled subscriber communities and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for re-purposing supervising are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, cross-media, integrated, six-sigma. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your long-term feature set? Instantly? Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based, affiliate-based? What does the jargon-based term "iteration" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Think user-centric, plug-and-play. Think cutting-edge. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? The B2B structuring factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We will revalue our ability to integrate without decreasing our capability to brand. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What does it really mean to engineer "dynamically"? We invariably enable granular data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Without having to learn Java? We understand that it is better to incubate globally than to evolve magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Do you have a plan to become B2B? Without back-end, innovative raw bandwidth, you will lack e-business iteration. It seems staggering, but it's completely realistic! We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. Think synergistic. Think virtual. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed, compelling, synergistic? What does the commonly-used standard industry term "back-end" really mean? We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to cultivate globally than to revolutionize transparently. What does the commonly-accepted term "wireless" really mean? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think mega-killer. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? The ability to repurpose virally leads to the capacity to enable intra-super-intuitively. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for coping with unplanned-for biometrics? What does it really mean to repurpose "seamlessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Python. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XML. We think that most cross-media, virally-distributed web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough WAP.