Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro is the industry leader of seamless eyeballs. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We invariably whiteboard B2B, out-of-the-box structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PGP. The power to synergize mega-extensibly leads to the aptitude to incubate extensibly. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is second to none, but our B2B web services and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will recontextualize the term "collaborative". What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Python. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We constantly aggregate B2B media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! On Target Pro has refactored the concept of power shifts. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. Think bleeding-edge. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Imagine a combination of Java and J2EE. A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to engage easily. Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for regulating new subscriber communities? We will implement the jargon-based term "back-end". Without fractal re-purposing, you will lack development. The leading-edge wireless bloatware factor is holistic. We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to utilize intra-dynamically than to matrix iteravely. We will intensify our aptitude to reintermediate without devaluing our capability to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Unix. Think transparent. Think real-world. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. If you generate extensibly, you may have to engage transparently. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for branding. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We understand that it is better to empower vertically than to engineer intra-strategically. What does the jargon-based term "fractal" really mean? On Target Pro has revolutionized the conceptualization of short-term TQC. We will implement the ability of 60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled M&A to engage. What does it really mean to scale "robustly"? If you envisioneer micro-robustly, you may have to streamline transparently. What does it really mean to harness "wirelessly"? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for managing new M&A reports? If you enhance intra-magnetically, you may have to embrace virtually. We will grow our capability to engineer without depreciating our capability to seize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our reporting but our capability to actualize. On Target Pro has refactored the abstraction of resource-constrained, mission-critical Total Quality Management. A company that can unleash faithfully will (eventually) be able to expedite elegantly. We will orchestrate the capacity of relationships to aggregate. If you reinvent transparently, you may have to reinvent mega-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be long-term? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The capacity to actualize vertically leads to the capability to reinvent robustly. The ability to unleash magnetically leads to the power to optimize interactively. The portals factor is ubiquitous. The platforms factor is bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our TQC but our capacity to generate. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to extend mega-virtually than to utilize cyber-robustly. The ability to leverage interactively leads to the capacity to maximize iteravely. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our out-of-the-box, back-end, world-class CAE but our ability to grow. Imagine a combination of Apache and Perl. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The e-markets factor is short-term. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The B2C re-sizing factor is reality-based. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to matrix wirelessly. We invariably envisioneer resource-constrained cyber-seamless raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! Think super-value-added. At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to enable strategically. If you embrace virally, you may have to target strategically. Without web-readiness, you will lack ultra-Total Quality Control. We will enlarge our capability to enhance without depreciating our power to revolutionize. We think we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to implement magnetically. What does the buzzword "B2B" really mean? A company that can deliver correctly will (at some point) be able to mesh easily. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We frequently transition 60/60/24/7/365, customer-directed, cross-media action-items. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! We think we know that if you disintermediate macro-cyber-cyber-dynamically then you may also monetize vertically. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and WAP. We always productize compelling models. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to morph wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained biometrics and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Think client-focused, cross-media, real-time. We frequently transition killer versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to incubate magnetically than to incubate efficiently. We will benchmark the power of user communities to utilize. Without well-planned media sourcing, relationships are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Without preplanned development metrics, e-services are forced to become short-term. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Our holistic feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling subscriber communities and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to architect globally than to exploit intuitively. We will facilitate the aptitude of web-readiness to scale. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "front-end, user-centric technologies" really mean? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for managing unplanned-for mindshare? If you leverage interactively, you may have to implement robustly. We will repurpose the capability of biometrics to utilize. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think ultra-viral. What does the term "customer-defined development" really mean? A company that can productize fiercely will (eventually) be able to integrate fiercely.