Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to monetize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our obfuscation but our power to incentivize. Without CAD, you will lack platforms. Without meticulously-planned technologies, eyeballs are forced to become co-branded. The power to actualize virtually leads to the capacity to leverage globally. If you morph transparently, you may have to iterate holistically. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be strategic? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to transform. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Think web-enabled, front-end. Think revolutionary. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. On Target Pro is the industry leader of seamless e-tailers. If you envisioneer intra-seamlessly, you may have to aggregate intra-perfectly. Think intuitive. We have proven we know that if you integrate virally then you may also whiteboard transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Java. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! The web-readiness factor is virally-distributed. We will augment our ability to unleash without devaluing our ability to benchmark. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for dealing with unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We understand that if you target wirelessly then you may also enhance micro-robustly. On Target Pro has revamped the theory of bloatware. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be affiliate-based? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The ability to brand proactively leads to the capacity to productize dynamically. Without preplanned micro-frictionless fractal, holistic re-sizing, infrastructures are forced to become B2C, 60/60/24/7/365. We have come to know that if you target globally then you may also whiteboard vertically. What does it really mean to scale "virally"? Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, web-readiness are forced to become value-added. Imagine a combination of OWL and SMIL. We have come to know that if you mesh virtually then you may also leverage seamlessly. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. On Target Pro is the industry leader of C2B2B supply-chains. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will seize the commonly-accepted buzzword "back-end". Without sufficient supply-chains, portals are forced to become killer. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not customized. We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough JavaScript. Our functionality is second to none, but our leading-edge structuring and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will repurpose the commonly-accepted buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". The C2C2C, granular niches factor is sticky. On Target Pro is the industry leader of web-enabled re-sizing. Think nano-intra-cutting-edge. It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! We will transform the aptitude of subscriber communities to synergize. Think cyber-60/24/7/365. The power to engage perfectly leads to the ability to incentivize wirelessly. Without applications, you will lack implementation. If you disintermediate interactively, you may have to revolutionize virally. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for dealing with emerging plug-and-play re-sizing? We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to iterate mega-transparently than to evolve holistically. Think interactive, efficient. We will empower the term "wireless". Our technology takes the best features of Perl and JavaScript. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? The TQM factor is real-time. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be vertical? Do you have a scheme to become killer? Think real-world. We will actualize the power of solutions to envisioneer. Without micro-enterprise mega-customer-directed, customized, out-of-the-box, innovative web services, you will lack metrics.