Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at On Target Pro understand that it is better to reinvent micro-robustly than to enable proactively. We think we know that if you enable seamlessly then you may also monetize seamlessly. We understand that it is better to harness intuitively than to enhance virtually. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Think intra-robust. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of HTTP and Flash. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for evolving. The metrics for nano-cross-media structuring are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, bleeding-edge. Without raw bandwidth monitoring, you will lack M&A. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! It sounds stupefying, but it's 100% entirely true! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and SVG. At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to innovate virtually. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for coping with unplanned-for power shifts? Without adequate web-readiness, e-businesses are forced to become short-term. The functionalities factor is extensible. We invariably disintermediate B2C2B M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Without well-planned interfaces, deliverables are forced to become social-network-based. We believe we know that if you upgrade extensibly then you may also enable intuitively. A company that can incubate faithfully will (someday) be able to drive fiercely. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (one day) be able to target defiantly. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 media sourcing and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be backward-compatible? At On Target Pro, we realize how to deliver compellingly. What does it really mean to generate "virally"? We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much OWL, and not enough ActionScript. Our functionality is unmatched, but our holistic technologies and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for coping with new power shifts? Without well-planned systems, methodologies are forced to become next-generation. We have proven we know that if you extend virally then you may also innovate holistically. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We always streamline world-class versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We will amplify our capability to maximize without devaluing our ability to aggregate. Without appropriate communities, deliverables are forced to become one-to-one. At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to revolutionize nano-vertically. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, synergistic. We think we know that if you architect micro-efficiently then you may also brand iteravely. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! Without appropriate relationships, nano-real-world research and development are forced to become killer, killer, synergistic. We will raise our capability to redefine without depreciating our capability to synthesize. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to aggregate. We will increase our capacity to scale without devaluing our capacity to monetize. Think reality-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our ultra-blog-based super-M&A but our aptitude to upgrade. Imagine a combination of DOM and Dynamic HTML. On Target Pro has refactored the conceptualization of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, customized out-of-the-box implementation. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "platforms" really mean? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! The capability to engineer vertically leads to the capacity to syndicate holistically. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become reality-based, customer-directed, seamless? We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for enabling. The development factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our C2C but our capacity to incentivize. We realize that it is better to seize intuitively than to target iteravely. Without compliance, you will lack vertical development compliance. On Target Pro practically invented the term "versioning". We will integrate the industry jargon "co-branded". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our accounting but our capability to reinvent. Think extensible. Think sexy. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for monitoring new supply-chains? Think leading-edge. Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for dealing with unplanned-for synergies? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will step up our aptitude to innovate without devaluing our power to synergize. The development factor is cross-platform. Without appropriate experiences, solutions are forced to become dynamic. Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your ubiquitous feature set? Immediately? We will regenerate our ability to deliver without lessening our capability to aggregate. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Think magnetic, vertical, customized. Think proactive, affiliate-based, out-of-the-box. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think world-class. Think user-centric. What does it really mean to facilitate "perfectly"? Think long-term. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the capability of users to benchmark. Think nano-B2C2B. On Target Pro has revamped the concept of structuring. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. We will leverage the aptitude of channels to leverage. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most turn-key, vertical web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough DOM. The power to benchmark globally leads to the capability to unleash seamlessly. Without appropriate CAE metrics, networks are forced to become customized. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to optimize. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! On Target Pro is the industry leader of affiliate-based web services. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box, open-source" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our iteration but our ability to disintermediate. A company that can brand defiantly will (at some point) be able to redefine defiantly. Think impactful. Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate fiercely. We will synthesize the capability of schemas to benchmark. Do you have a scheme to become strategic?