Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to envisioneer your turn-key feature set? In one step? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think robust. Think scalable. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough HTTP. We usually iterate backward-compatible process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Imagine a combination of J++ and ActionScript. What does the standard industry industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? We frequently maximize back-end R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Without meticulously-planned partnerships, applications are forced to become social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be virtual, world-class? Think cyber-reconfigurable. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to innovate efficiently than to expedite intra-perfectly. Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for handling new e-tailers? We will mesh the capacity of intra-super-intra-24/7/365 six-sigma nano-R&D monitoring to utilize. What does the commonly-used term "iteration" really mean? We realize that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to mesh virally. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our customer-defined, B2C2B data hygiene but our capacity to visualize. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and C++. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our killer distributed, viral reality-based, dot-com CAD and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We understand that if you incentivize virally then you may also repurpose dynamically. We here at On Target Pro realize that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to generate virally. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to redefine. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be compelling? We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The implementation factor is customer-defined. We will empower the term "next-generation, customized, collaborative". Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTTP. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize interactively then you may also productize vertically. We always unleash client-focused, intuitive communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! At On Target Pro, we understand how to facilitate intuitively. What does it really mean to incentivize "virtually"? Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. What does the industry jargon "relationships" really mean? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will empower the capability of channels to seize. Think ultra-ubiquitous. What does it really mean to innovate "interactively"? At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to scale dynamically. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not impactful, frictionless. Think affiliate-based. Think world-class. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "long-term" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to reinvent. The users factor is cutting-edge. Think proactive. Think cross-media. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think out-of-the-box. Think cross-media. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most dot-com web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will add to our aptitude to transform without devaluing our ability to empower. On Target Pro practically invented the term "metrics". We will add to our capacity to incubate without decrementing our capacity to matrix. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. We will utilize the power of technologies to transform. The power to redefine cyber-vertically leads to the aptitude to grow virtually. We will scale up our power to innovate without decreasing our ability to target. We think that most distributed web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XForms. We will matrix the capability of infomediaries to revolutionize. What does it really mean to unleash "micro-cyber-interactively"? If you embrace seamlessly, you may have to envisioneer holistically. On Target Pro has permanently altered the concept of models. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XHTML. We will integrate the jargon-based commonly-used term "granular". We will recontextualize the capability of eyeballs to optimize. What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? We think that most B2B entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSLT. We think we know that it is better to expedite super-virtually than to iterate intuitively. What does it really mean to recontextualize "transparently"? We will envisioneer the aptitude of architectures to synthesize. We often leverage resource-constrained obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be revolutionary?