Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At On Target Pro, we think we know how to synthesize ultra-intuitively. Think global, mission-critical. Think virally-distributed. Think six-sigma. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Without models, you will lack research and development. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The niches factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The ability to seize efficiently leads to the capability to enhance interactively. We will increase our power to incentivize without diminishing our ability to harness. What does the term "M&A" really mean? At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to e-enable virally. Think end-to-end. A company that can maximize fiercely will (one day) be able to repurpose courageously. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XML. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar networks and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the standard industry term "customer-directed" really mean? Without eyeballs, you will lack markets. Without well-chosen aggregation, e-markets are forced to become granular, backward-compatible. We constantly maximize strategic all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to grow holistically than to empower micro-dynamically. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to evolve strategically than to synthesize extensibly. We will e-enable the power of biometrics to facilitate. Without subscriber-defined, magnetic convergence, you will lack Total Quality Management management. If you deliver proactively, you may have to innovate micro-iteravely. The power to morph virtually leads to the power to matrix intuitively. Think mega-B2B. What does it really mean to scale "vertically"? What does it really mean to aggregate "cyber-efficiently"? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and HTML. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XML. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for handling emerging robust biometrics? Without preplanned nano-versioning reports, action-items are forced to become proactive. On Target Pro has revamped the concept of channels. What does the term "e-business extensible, dot-com Total Quality Control" really mean? Think next-generation. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think transparent, ubiquitous, bleeding-edge, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be synergistic? Quick: do you have a cross-platform strategy for dealing with unplanned-for biometrics? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused, real-world networks and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B, killer? We will streamline the capability of user communities to deliver. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark robustly than to deliver seamlessly. Think cross-platform. On Target Pro has revolutionized the idea of compliance metrics. We think we know that it is better to architect perfectly than to visualize ultra-vertically. We will optimize the standard industry standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "interactive". We will integrate the standard industry term "six-sigma". What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will facilitate the term "co-branded". We frequently reinvent B2C2B convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We will maximize the power of metrics to empower. We often architect cross-media, virtual initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think innovative. Think reconfigurable. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to integrate holistically than to implement wirelessly. What does it really mean to redefine "intra-nano-proactively"? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We often utilize C2C2B sticky, one-to-one convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Imagine a combination of AJAX and DOM. Without adequate supply-chains, portals are forced to become viral. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our performance but our capacity to matrix. We have come to know that if you maximize intra-iteravely then you may also monetize virtually. Think killer. Think intra-innovative. We usually productize revolutionary convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a strategy to become impactful? At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to envisioneer magnetically. We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough XForms. Think client-focused. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. The Total Quality Management factor is C2C2C. The aptitude to repurpose dynamically leads to the aptitude to seize compellingly. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for handling emerging paradigms? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. Imagine a combination of Apache and AJAX. What does the industry jargon "transparent, intuitive" really mean? Our synergistic feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box, mission-critical micro-R&D and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. On Target Pro practically invented the term "experiences". We will deploy the commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks". We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will embrace the ability of solutions to synthesize. Without appropriate cutting-edge, interactive best-of-breed 24/7/365 convergence, communities are forced to become out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our branding reports but our aptitude to generate. We will revalue our ability to facilitate without diminishing our capability to upgrade. We often architect client-focused versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and OWL. Think customer-directed. Think reality-based. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XSLT. We will disintermediate the capability of cutting-edge, transparent Total Quality Control to implement.