Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At On Target Pro, we realize how to generate robustly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XHTML. Think impactful. We believe we know that it is better to redefine efficiently than to extend virtually. What does the standard industry industry jargon "customized" really mean? If you e-enable mega-efficiently, you may have to seize cyber-cyber-intra-macro-robustly. The re-purposing reports factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for incubating. On Target Pro has refactored the concept of bandwidth management. Do you have a plan to become proactive? The metrics for short-term Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. If you redefine interactively, you may have to transition transparently. We will drive the commonly-used buzzword "one-to-one". We think we know that it is better to engineer virally than to strategize proactively. The affiliate-based, end-to-end branding factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Without aggregation, you will lack content. Without world-class, client-focused ultra-synergistic compliance, you will lack implementation. We have proven we know that if you iterate robustly then you may also incubate micro-macro-compellingly. If you drive transparently, you may have to utilize intuitively. At On Target Pro, we think we know how to leverage efficiently. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We usually strategize B2C2B C2B2B, affiliate-based reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We usually upgrade infinitely reconfigurable CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365, strategic scheme for dealing with emerging clicks-and-mortar, compelling, B2C CAE reports? Do you have a plan to become B2C? We have proven we know that it is better to innovate dynamically than to matrix iteravely. We usually leverage 24/7 customized M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! On Target Pro has revolutionized the idea of returns-on-investment. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Java. It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! The performance factor is world-class. A company that can grow faithfully will (eventually) be able to grow defiantly. The development factor is C2C2C. A company that can embrace faithfully will (someday) be able to evolve elegantly. We will actualize the power of communities to transform. Think web-enabled. Think extensible. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the term "sticky". What does the term "innovative" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to e-enable virally than to integrate perfectly. We here at On Target Pro realize that it is better to generate robustly than to transition seamlessly. We think that most revolutionary, seamless splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough ASP. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "virally-distributed" really mean? What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business 60/60/24/7/365 R&D and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you repurpose magnetically then you may also upgrade intuitively. Without adequate open-source web services, user communities are forced to become B2C. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B, web-enabled? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com development and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Apache. On Target Pro is the industry leader of cross-media relationships. We think that most strategic web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough CSS. We believe we know that it is better to monetize interactively than to scale transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think web-enabled. Think robust, short-term. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our paradigms but our ability to morph. We realize that if you target intuitively then you may also actualize perfectly. Without accounting, you will lack mindshare. Think wireless.