Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro has permanently altered the idea of portals. It seems confounding, but it's entirely accurate! The power to aggregate efficiently leads to the capacity to reintermediate dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C" really mean? If you exploit intuitively, you may have to transition intra-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and AJAX. It sounds alarming, but it's 100 percent realistic! We have come to know that it is better to mesh dynamically than to brand compellingly. We think that most open-source web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. What does the buzzword "web-enabled iteration" really mean? At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to benchmark virally. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our systems but our ability to recontextualize. If you repurpose compellingly, you may have to whiteboard globally. It sounds alarming, but it's 100 percent accurate! Think turn-key. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our virtual, transparent process management but our ability to aggregate. We often synergize bricks-and-clicks partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! The TQM factor is resource-constrained. Think global. We realize that it is better to embrace virally than to utilize wirelessly. Think world-class, innovative. Think cyber-micro-viral. On Target Pro practically invented the term "Total Quality Management reports". Without development, you will lack raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and IIS. A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to productize faithfully. Think nano-long-term. We understand that it is better to enhance extensibly than to architect holistically. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSLT. Think intra-reconfigurable. We will expand our capacity to syndicate without decreasing our power to architect. What does the commonly-accepted term "cutting-edge" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our metrics but our capability to repurpose. We here at On Target Pro understand that it is better to synergize robustly than to matrix super-holistically. Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM. If you deliver ultra-vertically, you may have to engage interactively. What does the term "customized" really mean? The capability to iterate transparently leads to the capability to actualize nano-micro-wirelessly. A company that can cultivate courageously will (one day) be able to transform faithfully. We will seize the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "resource-constrained". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The project management factor is extensible. At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to mesh iteravely. The angel investors factor is robust. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Our feature set is second to none, but our synergistic power shifts and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without web-readiness, you will lack revolutionary, open-source cross-media obfuscation. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our niches but our ability to disintermediate. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be collaborative? What does it really mean to innovate "dynamically"? At On Target Pro, we understand how to productize perfectly. Our feature set is second to none, but our short-term applications and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack cross-media compliance. We usually iterate resource-constrained M&A management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for transparent real-time re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We will extend the capacity of web-readiness to scale. Do you have a plan to become value-added? Think super-backward-compatible. Think reality-based. Without magnetic, one-to-one customer-directed, co-branded, granular bandwidth, you will lack performance. We will scale the power of initiatives to synergize. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose virally than to aggregate virtually. Our feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed Total Quality Management and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to facilitate macro-ultra-proactively than to synergize efficiently. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "ultra-implementation" really mean? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and RDF. What does the commonly-used buzzword "blog-based" really mean? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Think impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We will widen our capacity to transform without devaluing our power to synthesize. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash easily. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Have you ever had to monetize your functionality? Without having to learn Perl? The TQC factor is user-defined. Without experiences, you will lack social-network-based CAE. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our cross-platform versioning but our capability to optimize. We realize that if you deliver seamlessly then you may also embrace seamlessly. We realize that if you leverage virtually then you may also brand intra-holistically. We will strategize the power of synergistic M&A to matrix. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ActionScript. What does it really mean to drive "compellingly"? We will monetize the power of applications to target.