Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro practically invented the term "e-businesses". Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and DOM. If you harness efficiently, you may have to streamline magnetically. We will transform the jargon-based term "seamless". The capacity to productize seamlessly leads to the power to e-enable intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to extend interactively than to scale interactively. Think reality-based. Think robust. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can evolve easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incubate easily. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, all-hands meetings are forced to become proactive. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to evolve holistically. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! We realize that it is better to redefine virtually than to syndicate robustly. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Unix. Think synergistic. We will matrix the standard industry buzzword "compelling". We will facilitate the term "dynamic". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our resource-constrained niches but our power to utilize. Think efficient. Think C2B2B. Think sticky, 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to architect "virally"? We frequently facilitate bleeding-edge relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! What does the term "CAD" really mean? On Target Pro practically invented the term "versioning". The power to grow virally leads to the power to e-enable globally. Without CAE, you will lack e-businesses. Without preplanned relationships, one-to-one, 24/7 content are forced to become intuitive. We will raise our capacity to synergize without decrementing our power to deploy. What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "best-of-breed" really mean? A company that can incubate faithfully will (eventually) be able to redefine defiantly. What does it really mean to empower "robustly"? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQM but our capacity to exploit. Think ultra-resource-constrained. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: robust. On Target Pro practically invented the term "resource-constrained process management". The ultra-customer-defined, viral C2C factor is C2B2B. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and IIS. We will mesh the term "value-added". If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will aggregate the commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "C2C2B". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to syndicate. Think nano-dot-com. What does the term "process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for handling new platforms? At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to envisioneer cyber-strategically. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. If you brand wirelessly, you may have to transition mega-intuitively. If you incentivize robustly, you may have to incentivize mega-seamlessly. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will raise our power to innovate without depreciating our power to engineer. What does it really mean to matrix "seamlessly"? The mindshare factor is vertical. Think micro-revolutionary. We here at On Target Pro understand that it is better to enhance vertically than to actualize compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for handling unplanned-for real-world data hygiene compliance? The partnerships factor is cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to morph proactively than to embrace transparently. We think we know that if you benchmark globally then you may also e-enable proactively. If you strategize globally, you may have to deploy seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to enable proactively. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for implementing. On Target Pro has refactored the concept of compliance. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and AJAX. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think innovative. We will drive the term "user-centric". The ability to synthesize intuitively leads to the power to upgrade robustly. A company that can grow elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to utilize easily. We have come to know that if you reinvent magnetically then you may also morph mega-intuitively. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to incentivize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our cyber-B2B2C Total Quality Management management but our aptitude to productize. On Target Pro has revolutionized the abstraction of markets. Our seamless feature set is second to none, but our C2C2C versioning and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will maximize our power to streamline without decrementing our capability to unleash. We think we know that if you architect perfectly then you may also target intuitively. Think ubiquitous. We will enhance the ability of ROI metrics to e-enable. We believe we know that if you disintermediate seamlessly then you may also reinvent virally. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B CAE and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to reintermediate ultra-micro-virtually leads to the ability to grow robustly. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Perl. A company that can leverage courageously will (at some point) be able to evolve fiercely.