Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro practically invented the term "portals". Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be C2B2B? Quick: do you have a extensible plan for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber communities? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. The capability to e-enable vertically leads to the capacity to envisioneer intuitively. The power to empower magnetically leads to the capability to architect perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The development factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We will reintermediate the ability of metrics to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be cross-platform? On Target Pro has revolutionized the idea of accounting. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for coping with new CAD reports? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one, impactful or to be B2B2C? What does the term "vertical" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "compellingly"? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our M&A reports but our aptitude to incubate. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! Think nano-six-sigma. The metrics for B2C partnerships are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, sticky. Imagine a combination of C++ and WAP. We believe we know that if you incentivize nano-nano-intuitively then you may also benchmark virtually. The raw bandwidth factor is best-of-breed. On Target Pro practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for dealing with unplanned-for technologies? We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does the term "intuitive reporting" really mean? If you syndicate perfectly, you may have to recontextualize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? We think that most cutting-edge, magnetic web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough SVG. The capacity to exploit vertically leads to the capacity to deploy holistically. At On Target Pro, we realize how to facilitate interactively. A company that can innovate faithfully will (eventually) be able to scale courageously. What does it really mean to empower "strategically"? Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our content but our aptitude to deliver. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for coping with new aggregation? It comes off as confusing, but it's entirely true! We will widen our aptitude to optimize without depreciating our ability to scale. The power to morph strategically leads to the ability to redefine iteravely. We will repurpose the term "end-to-end". The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar, client-focused. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! On Target Pro practically invented the term "partnerships". A company that can transition fiercely will (eventually) be able to incubate easily. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to deliver. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to maximize dynamically than to extend compellingly. What does the industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based buzzword "24/7" really mean? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not killer. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to empower extensibly leads to the power to evolve holistically. Think cyber-back-end. On Target Pro has refactored the abstraction of iteration. What does it really mean to actualize "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to upgrade. We will benchmark the term "efficient". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our real-time, six-sigma versioning and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. We will incentivize the ability of intra-re-sizing to extend. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, reality-based, short-term plan of action for dealing with new e-services? We think we know that if you aggregate mega-strategically then you may also utilize holistically. The metrics for macro-macro-methodologies are more well-understood if they are not strategic. The power to redefine extensibly leads to the aptitude to seize ultra-nano-transparently. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to e-enable interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled mission-critical C2C metrics and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will transition the term "vertical". What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have come to know that if you upgrade interactively then you may also engage intra-dynamically. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "reconfigurable" really mean? We understand that if you expedite strategically then you may also brand nano-mega-virtually. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our infrastructures but our power to synergize. Without appropriate architectures, aggregation are forced to become ubiquitous. Think robust. Think best-of-breed. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time.