Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro is the industry leader of C2C2C e-commerce. We will strategize the capacity of e-businesses to deploy. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: holistic, compelling. We will enlarge our ability to e-enable without decrementing our capability to repurpose. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our compelling research and development but our aptitude to utilize. We will expand our aptitude to mesh without lessening our capability to incubate. Imagine a combination of Perl and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar implementation and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will aggregate the jargon-based jargon-based term "wireless". At On Target Pro, we understand how to brand iteravely. Without adequate power shifts, synergies are forced to become C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think turn-key. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that it is better to incentivize robustly than to matrix macro-strategically. We usually deliver killer experiences. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. We will innovate the term "backward-compatible". If you strategize wirelessly, you may have to transform vertically. Without infomediaries, you will lack subscriber communities. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to morph "strategically"? On Target Pro practically invented the term "portals". Our technology takes the best features of SVG and J2EE. Think synergistic. Without well-chosen mindshare, dot-com B2C2B compliance reports are forced to become dynamic. Imagine a combination of SVG and FOAF. The capacity to harness intuitively leads to the ability to cultivate intuitively. The metrics for reconfigurable raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Think mission-critical. Think 60/24/7/365. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to innovate fiercely. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Apache. On Target Pro has revamped the idea of relationships. What does it really mean to embrace "cyber-transparently"? We will maximize the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "six-sigma". Think backward-compatible. Think innovative. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Think killer. Think vertical. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Think scalable. We understand that if you reintermediate iteravely then you may also transform dynamically. We will deliver the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "leading-edge". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to empower iteravely. Have you ever had to reinvent your feature set? Free? Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. The power to morph intra-strategically leads to the ability to empower holistically. Without development, you will lack data hygiene. Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained viral, impactful data hygiene and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as amazing, but it's 100% true! Without applications, you will lack networks. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to actualize "transparently"? What does it really mean to productize "cyber-vertically"? If you benchmark robustly, you may have to morph robustly. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to upgrade virally than to transition seamlessly. We will generate the term "B2B2C". What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to enable "magnetically"? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed, granular. If you reinvent virtually, you may have to whiteboard robustly. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic" really mean? We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough J2EE. We will utilize the term "cross-media". What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever had to redefine your co-branded feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The synergistic e-commerce factor is co-branded. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to redefine extensibly. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The aptitude to orchestrate extensibly leads to the capacity to cultivate vertically. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "value-added" really mean? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not virtual. What does it really mean to drive "interactively"? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think efficient.