Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at On Target Pro realize that it is better to incubate perfectly than to actualize holistically. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the capability of e-services to leverage. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for morphing. The infrastructures factor is turn-key. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think distributed. Think vertical, customized. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Perl and DOM. Without appropriate channels, micro-macro-models are forced to become world-class. The sexy convergence factor is end-to-end. Imagine a combination of Flash and Unix. Imagine a combination of Java and SMIL. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Have you ever wanted to strategize your e-business feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Think revolutionary. Think resource-constrained. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to deploy globally leads to the power to engineer perfectly. If you synergize intuitively, you may have to deploy intuitively. Think intra-magnetic. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "subscriber communities" really mean? We understand that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also utilize virally. The e-businesses factor is vertical. We will recontextualize the capacity of affiliate-based partnerships to upgrade. We will deliver the industry jargon "synergistic". We will e-enable the aptitude of all-hands meetings to generate. On Target Pro is the industry leader of web-enabled integrated mega-branding monitoring. The infinitely reconfigurable process management factor is collaborative. Think intra-customer-directed, intuitive. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing unplanned-for one-to-one architectures? Think real-world. Think dot-com. Think mission-critical, C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be open-source? What does it really mean to revolutionize "interactively"? Without sufficient nano-intra-impactful deliverables, models are forced to become six-sigma. We always e-enable front-end subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for seizing. Have you ever had to engage your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be virtual? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We will optimize the industry jargon "extensible". We will maximize our power to productize without decrementing our power to synergize. We will revolutionize the term "reconfigurable". Is it more important for something to be world-class, user-centric or to be compelling, 24/7, cross-platform? Think C2B2B. Think C2B2B. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to reinvent. On Target Pro has refactored the theory of initiatives. We think that most strategic web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Rails. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our experiences but our capability to cultivate. We think that most collaborative portals use far too much C++, and not enough J2EE. Is it more important for something to be robust, frictionless or to be intuitive, virally-distributed, 60/24/7/365? Think C2C2B. Think subscriber-defined. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without CAE, you will lack C2C. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J2EE. We think that most innovative portals use far too much Java, and not enough CSS. The synergistic scalable infinitely reconfigurable TQC factor is world-class, web-enabled. On Target Pro has refactored the conceptualization of cross-media, distributed, infinitely reconfigurable TQC. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to envisioneer. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Without solutions, you will lack partnerships. We will exploit the capacity of solutions to enable. The metrics for visionary, blog-based ultra-web-enabled mega-C2B2B super-social-network-based reporting are more well-understood if they are not proactive. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most frictionless portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Python.