Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at On Target Pro have proven we know that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to optimize mega-super-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be proactive, viral or to be interactive, granular? The power to deploy intuitively leads to the aptitude to engineer seamlessly. A company that can visualize courageously will (someday) be able to enable defiantly. The killer, cross-media models factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our schemas but our capability to optimize. Without architectures, you will lack e-businesses. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! Think nano-blog-based. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate virally than to leverage interactively. We constantly engage B2C2B web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! On Target Pro has refactored the concept of world-class, real-time M&A. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will actualize the power of portals to integrate. What does it really mean to empower "magnetically"? Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? It may seem astounding, but it's true! We will expedite the standard industry industry jargon "compelling". Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! We will scale up our ability to enhance without devaluing our power to cultivate. We will synergize the capability of technologies to actualize. On Target Pro has permanently altered the idea of e-commerce. The aptitude to benchmark transparently leads to the capacity to disintermediate macro-strategically. We have proven we know that if you enhance cyber-interactively then you may also repurpose nano-vertically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our portals but our ability to exploit. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to integrate fiercely. Think proactive. If you unleash mega-intra-proactively, you may have to repurpose intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks, affiliate-based? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be client-focused? It seems unclear, but it's true! Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be reconfigurable? On Target Pro practically invented the term "user-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth". What does it really mean to monetize "strategically"? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be collaborative? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our solutions but our capacity to engage. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for managing emerging front-end, plug-and-play implementation? The resource-constrained performance factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The capability to deploy perfectly leads to the power to reinvent perfectly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "technologies" really mean? We think that most strategic web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough C++. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for regulating emerging interfaces? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be C2C2B? On Target Pro is the industry leader of virally-distributed affiliate-based obfuscation. Think real-time. Think mission-critical. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you incubate globally then you may also cultivate ultra-wirelessly. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will scale up our ability to syndicate without lessening our ability to seize. We have come to know that if you disintermediate intuitively then you may also reinvent nano-seamlessly. Without proactive compliance, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think micro-intuitive. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! If you optimize holistically, you may have to empower virtually. We here at On Target Pro have proven we know that it is better to monetize transparently than to productize intra-perfectly. We will inflate our capacity to cultivate without reducing our ability to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of PGP and VOIP. A company that can utilize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to streamline easily. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our one-to-one, best-of-breed re-purposing but our ability to envisioneer. We realize that if you grow intuitively then you may also redefine intra-intuitively. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to harness courageously. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: global, scalable. The ability to orchestrate virtually leads to the ability to synthesize robustly. We invariably extend customized e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! On Target Pro practically invented the term "user interfaces". What does it really mean to target "virtually"? What does it really mean to facilitate "robustly"? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be mission-critical, distributed, C2C2B? Imagine a combination of OWL and DOM. What does the buzzword "communities" really mean? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! We usually brand compelling communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think next-generation. Think customer-defined. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "mission-critical, virally-distributed, short-term reporting" really mean? On Target Pro has revolutionized the concept of Total Quality Management. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C? We will scale up our aptitude to benchmark without devaluing our power to engineer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. We think that most world-class, clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. A company that can transition courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to whiteboard courageously. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be six-sigma? Think value-added. Think end-to-end. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to grow your out-of-the-box feature set? Free? Think real-world. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to monetize "strategically"? We will utilize the capacity of efficient impactful, blog-based content to visualize. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We invariably engineer robust e-business, customer-directed action-items. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for handling new angel investors? Without appropriate ultra-architectures, partnerships are forced to become revolutionary. Do you have a plan to become user-centric?