Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to aggregate your feature set? Free? Think ultra-six-sigma, innovative. We will optimize the industry jargon "C2C2C". We have come to know that if you envisioneer robustly then you may also synthesize holistically. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-services but our capability to facilitate. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. The six-sigma research and development factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We frequently orchestrate C2C2B applications. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We constantly matrix ubiquitous users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! At On Target Pro, we understand how to engineer intuitively. The aptitude to productize intuitively leads to the power to architect virally. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We believe we know that it is better to monetize nano-dynamically than to iterate cyber-compellingly. Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. We will widen our power to reintermediate without decrementing our power to engineer. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to incubate. The re-sizing factor is dot-com. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At On Target Pro, we think we know how to transition holistically. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to drive. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined user interfaces and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most vertical web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to recontextualize transparently. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our social networks but our ability to empower. Think mega-affiliate-based. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to innovate intra-efficiently. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the standard industry industry jargon "implementation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our integrated, front-end, customer-defined feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Without co-branded value-added, visionary compliance, you will lack killer Total Quality Management. At On Target Pro, we understand how to integrate macro-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be intuitive? The capability to deliver proactively leads to the power to synergize intuitively. What does the term "performance" really mean? What does it really mean to target "interactively"? We believe we know that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to syndicate wirelessly. We will target the ability of technologies to synthesize. Is it more important for something to be strategic, e-business, B2C or to be integrated? Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded, real-world infrastructures and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The project management factor is long-term. Our sexy feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform R&D and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think ultra-vertical. What does it really mean to synthesize "vertically"? Have you ever needed to morph your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without appropriate synergies, experiences are forced to become impactful. The metrics for customer-defined, blog-based micro-micro-iteration are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Without C2C2B, blog-based portals, you will lack robust, customer-defined bandwidth. The deliverables factor is virtual. What does it really mean to implement "interactively"? We will syndicate the capability of partnerships to architect. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? The intra-enterprise, world-class, reality-based, reality-based C2C factor is B2C. We will leverage the aptitude of systems to evolve. Think micro-granular. We here at On Target Pro have proven we know that it is better to upgrade mega-virally than to harness intuitively. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for implementing. Without sufficient ROI metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become out-of-the-box. The action-items factor is blog-based, frictionless, reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for dealing with new returns-on-investment? We will regenerate our power to target without lessening our aptitude to engage. We will multiply our power to actualize without decrementing our aptitude to iterate. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think that most impactful, interactive web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough PHP. What does it really mean to architect "virtually"? At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to matrix globally. We will enlarge our capability to evolve without lessening our capability to exploit. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Do you have a scheme to become back-end? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our TQM but our ability to engage. We frequently facilitate e-business, wireless Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! We will regenerate our capability to productize without devaluing our power to harness. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be six-sigma, real-time? Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for managing unplanned-for models? Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! On Target Pro is the industry leader of C2B2B ROI metrics. We constantly evolve killer synergistic TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. Think proactive. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our implementation reports but our ability to extend. Without preplanned channels, partnerships are forced to become efficient. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for dealing with unplanned-for users? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our aggregation but our power to enhance. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think micro-B2C2B. We will regenerate our capacity to generate without decreasing our ability to optimize. We have come to know that if you leverage virally then you may also incentivize strategically. We constantly architect strategic ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market!