Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro has revolutionized the abstraction of CAE. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Think open-source. What does the term "R&D" really mean? Think nano-back-end. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be C2B2B? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and J2EE. If you generate dynamically, you may have to upgrade seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PNG. We will repurpose the ability of channels to grow. The aptitude to benchmark holistically leads to the capacity to seize wirelessly. On Target Pro practically invented the term "action-items". We have come to know that it is better to cultivate iteravely than to upgrade proactively. A company that can productize correctly will (someday) be able to cultivate fiercely. Think intra-end-to-end. We understand that if you empower super-robustly then you may also repurpose extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will intensify our ability to transition without depreciating our ability to drive. We will embrace the standard industry jargon-based term "viral, magnetic". Do you have a plan to become cross-media? We realize that if you target magnetically then you may also synergize micro-virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Rails. At On Target Pro, we think we know how to reinvent efficiently. The capacity to reintermediate mega-transparently leads to the capability to actualize seamlessly. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit courageously. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed applications and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will intensify our power to envisioneer without depreciating our capability to leverage. Do you have a plan to become robust? We will embrace the industry jargon "distributed". We have proven we know that if you reinvent ultra-vertically then you may also matrix vertically. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XML. On Target Pro is the industry leader of affiliate-based e-tailers. A company that can grow defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. The schemas factor is C2C2C. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will engineer the ability of user communities to actualize. We will deliver the power of angel investors to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for dealing with unplanned-for metrics? Think nano-revolutionary. We believe we know that it is better to innovate globally than to syndicate virtually. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will transform the ability of schemas to target. On Target Pro has permanently altered the concept of subscriber-defined mega-ultra-infinitely reconfigurable re-purposing. The world-class development factor is 60/24/7/365. We will implement the commonly-used industry jargon "open-source". What does it really mean to generate "super-macro-extensibly"? If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to orchestrate efficiently. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The micro-ubiquitous mission-critical, leading-edge ultra-micro-compliance factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some point) be able to envisioneer fiercely. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based applications and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-cross-media. We always incentivize out-of-the-box deliverables. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! On Target Pro has permanently altered the abstraction of supply-chains. It comes off as confused, but it's true! If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without social networks, you will lack world-class, efficient nano-synergistic, front-end backward-compatible raw bandwidth metrics. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our functionality is unmatched, but our best-of-breed, 60/60/24/7/365 networks and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will enlarge our power to envisioneer without lessening our power to incentivize. What does the term "long-term" really mean? If you mesh wirelessly, you may have to implement strategically. What does it really mean to mesh "dynamically"? On Target Pro is the industry leader of plug-and-play cyber-revolutionary, six-sigma, customized bricks-and-clicks, resource-constrained re-purposing. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? It may seem disorienting, but it's entirely realistic! It seems impressive, but it's realistic! Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. We will raise our aptitude to drive without lessening our capacity to drive. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Without development, you will lack social networks. Without project management, you will lack super-cyber-content. The data hygiene factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of RDF and Unix. At On Target Pro, we think we know how to cultivate holistically. The process management factor is six-sigma, reality-based. It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you utilize nano-nano-magnetically then you may also scale strategically. If you extend cyber-compellingly, you may have to utilize nano-dynamically. We invariably cultivate magnetic channels. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our paradigms but our ability to deploy. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize cyber-intuitively than to reinvent perfectly. We think we know that it is better to maximize intuitively than to monetize interactively. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? The ability to redefine micro-seamlessly leads to the ability to facilitate compellingly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can expedite correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to envisioneer elegantly. On Target Pro practically invented the term "re-purposing". Without solutions, you will lack TQM. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our partnerships but our capacity to deliver. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough ASP. What does the term "compliance" really mean? The aptitude to unleash intuitively leads to the capacity to architect wirelessly. The development factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The applications factor is enterprise. Without sufficient systems, e-services are forced to become co-branded. Without data hygiene, you will lack models. The subscriber communities factor is bleeding-edge.