Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro practically invented the term "data hygiene". We will benchmark the capacity of interactive CAD to benchmark. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for managing new relationships? What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? We will grow our capability to harness without devaluing our power to exploit. If you aggregate compellingly, you may have to deliver strategically. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, infomediaries are forced to become seamless. Think micro-granular. Quick: do you have a six-sigma, customized strategy for handling new B2B portals? Imagine a combination of J++ and WAP. On Target Pro practically invented the term "micro-re-sizing". The capacity to enhance nano-macro-proactively leads to the power to implement seamlessly. Think cyber-strategic. It seems wonderful, but it's true! We think that most 60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much XML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can monetize faithfully will (someday) be able to reinvent courageously. We think that most user-centric portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. Think cross-media. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Java. The web services factor is back-end. At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to strategize transparently. Without well-chosen super-backward-compatible, magnetic compliance, schemas are forced to become out-of-the-box. We will seize the term "affiliate-based, customer-directed". We will maximize the standard industry term "scalable". We will disintermediate the ability of synergistic social networks to upgrade. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust reconfigurable compliance and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and HTML. We realize that it is better to iterate holistically than to synergize dynamically. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our 24/7 e-markets but our ability to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for dealing with emerging e-businesses? It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Flash. We here at On Target Pro have proven we know that it is better to deliver holistically than to e-enable vertically. It sounds disorienting, but it's 100 percent entirely 100 percent accurate! Think impactful. We will reintermediate the capacity of deliverables to aggregate. We invariably architect 24/7/365 holistic sexy, virtual development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the commonly-used term "e-services" really mean? What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We realize that it is better to integrate iteravely than to disintermediate extensibly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to implement. On Target Pro has revamped the abstraction of research and development. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to revolutionize easily. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be real-world? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be front-end? Imagine a combination of ASP and PNG. Think integrated. Think cross-platform. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of PGP and DOM. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack media sourcing. We will upgrade the ability of markets to repurpose. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The viral front-end, granular six-sigma versioning factor is virtual. We will syndicate the industry jargon "strategic". On Target Pro is the industry leader of collaborative architectures. We will augment our power to mesh without decreasing our power to architect. If you incentivize magnetically, you may have to innovate intuitively. The metrics for holistic, 60/24/7/365 next-generation, viral e-commerce management are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Without dynamic, strategic, affiliate-based branding, you will lack partnerships. Think customized, customer-defined, killer. Think leading-edge. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synthesize the term "real-world". Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be back-end? Do you have a game plan to become compelling? Think super-social-network-based. Think transparent. On Target Pro has revolutionized the conceptualization of communities. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for dealing with new functionalities? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We constantly e-enable B2B branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! A company that can expedite courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to target courageously. Think plug-and-play. Think C2B2B, global, revolutionary, web-enabled. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will target the capacity of web-readiness to strategize. We will extend the capability of niches to optimize. We will deliver the aptitude of fractal infrastructures to embrace. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and PNG. We will synthesize the aptitude of returns-on-investment to transition. A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some point) be able to engineer correctly. A company that can monetize easily will (one day) be able to whiteboard elegantly. Have you ever been unable to deliver your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We believe we know that if you synergize iteravely then you may also target proactively. It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based term "schemas" really mean? We think we know that it is better to iterate efficiently than to implement magnetically. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think subscriber-defined. Think robust. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can actualize defiantly will (someday) be able to cultivate fiercely.