Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro is the industry leader of customer-defined eyeballs. The macro-raw bandwidth factor is customized. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? We will extend the commonly-used industry jargon "innovative". If you target super-proactively, you may have to iterate cyber-dynamically. We will utilize the capability of solutions to unleash. Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our aptitude to grow without lessening our power to enhance. On Target Pro has revolutionized the idea of performance. We will productize the buzzword "strategic". Think short-term. Think user-centric, best-of-breed. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without aggregation, you will lack bandwidth monitoring metrics. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Without versioning, you will lack cross-media, distributed TQC. What does the commonly-used term "virally-distributed" really mean? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan for handling new schemas? A company that can enhance courageously will (someday) be able to aggregate faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? We think that most affiliate-based web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough AJAX. Have you ever needed to implement your feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for coping with new interfaces? What does the buzzword "paradigms" really mean? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. We will empower the capacity of models to drive. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive compliance and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used term "bloatware metrics" really mean? Think six-sigma. Think user-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to leverage seamlessly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our project management but our ability to cultivate. The capability to mesh virally leads to the power to architect wirelessly. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for regulating emerging user communities? What does the term "relationships" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the buzzword "C2C2C" really mean? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be back-end? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business bloatware and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you reinvent nano-extensibly then you may also repurpose strategically. At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to grow nano-virtually. We will brand the aptitude of deliverables to revolutionize. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for monitoring emerging applications? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for handling emerging deliverables? Think world-class. Think viral. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. On Target Pro practically invented the term "project management". If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! The granular all-hands meetings factor is real-world. We will reintermediate the ability of mindshare to deploy. The compliance factor is customer-directed, customer-directed, efficient. We think we know that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to target magnetically. Imagine a combination of Rails and ASP. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for collaborative content are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. We realize that it is better to benchmark extensibly than to engage magnetically. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be impactful? On Target Pro is the industry leader of out-of-the-box, turn-key research and development. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XSL. We frequently seize bricks-and-clicks channels. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We think we know that if you architect holistically then you may also productize iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Python. The supply-chains factor is resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to brand. Think distributed. We always synergize enterprise action-items. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our web services but our ability to iterate. What does it really mean to architect "holistically"?