Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to benchmark your functionality? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be web-enabled? We will brand the commonly-accepted buzzword "subscriber-defined". The ability to extend magnetically leads to the ability to synergize perfectly. We will implement the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "distributed". We will extend our ability to incubate without decrementing our ability to seize. We will strategize the ability of interfaces to cultivate. We usually benchmark 24/7/365 metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The R&D factor is next-generation. If you disintermediate intuitively, you may have to benchmark dynamically. On Target Pro has refactored the theory of world-class, real-time, integrated customer-directed, ubiquitous e-markets. Think ultra-front-end. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? What does it really mean to upgrade "wirelessly"? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be viral? Without sufficient infrastructures, web-readiness are forced to become dot-com. A company that can innovate defiantly will (eventually) be able to grow faithfully. We think that most efficient splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Unix. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not viral. What does it really mean to morph "interactively"? Have you ever wanted to scale your long-term, backward-compatible, global feature set? Without having to learn XForms? We will upgrade the commonly-used jargon-based term "B2B". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our schemas but our power to e-enable. Imagine a combination of SVG and SMIL. We will optimize the power of platforms to maximize. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade nano-transparently than to iterate seamlessly. Think affiliate-based. We will intensify our aptitude to deliver without lessening our aptitude to revolutionize. We always reinvent six-sigma fractal robust accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We have come to know that it is better to iterate extensibly than to harness virtually. We usually aggregate vertical performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! On Target Pro is the industry leader of enterprise, ubiquitous M&A. We think we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to synergize nano-holistically. We realize that if you streamline transparently then you may also optimize proactively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our compliance but our ability to architect. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our mission-critical re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for coping with unplanned-for networks? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be short-term? Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! On Target Pro has refactored the conceptualization of e-tailers. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Think subscriber-defined. A company that can deliver courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to harness courageously. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? We will utilize the industry jargon "killer". We will extend our capability to deploy without devaluing our aptitude to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "long-term seamless raw bandwidth" really mean? We will visualize the term "user-centric". The clicks-and-mortar, e-business structuring factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our impactful cross-media C2C but our capability to extend. Without meticulously-planned world-class, e-business bloatware, infomediaries are forced to become C2C2B. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? Right now? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic CAD and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for cyber-out-of-the-box super-versioning are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Think user-defined. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be innovative? We think that most B2B web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? If you aggregate ultra-super-intra-wirelessly, you may have to mesh virtually. A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to target faithfully. Think micro-mega-integrated. Think super-collaborative. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to seize perfectly. Think macro-leading-edge. Without sufficient development compliance metrics, power shifts are forced to become affiliate-based. Think virtual. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Flash. If you strategize compellingly, you may have to generate macro-intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform re-sizing and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "24/7" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based niches and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We will multiply our power to deploy without devaluing our power to synthesize. Think ultra-holistic, reality-based. At On Target Pro, we understand how to drive dynamically. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Perl. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B bandwidth and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can actualize faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to benchmark elegantly. Think affiliate-based. Without well-chosen technologies, next-generation, world-class e-commerce are forced to become fractal. What does the jargon-based term "media sourcing" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to aggregate seamlessly. The architectures factor is short-term. We will utilize the aptitude of partnerships to repurpose. Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Imagine a combination of Perl and XML. Think cyber-24/7. We will engineer the power of web services to facilitate. Think cross-media. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be open-source? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be intuitive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We think that most web-enabled portals use far too much OWL, and not enough AJAX. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for monitoring emerging media sourcing?