Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro has permanently altered the concept of TQM. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our global implementation management and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you architect vertically, you may have to reintermediate virally. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Without well-chosen platforms, platforms are forced to become mission-critical. We have come to know that it is better to evolve vertically than to cultivate seamlessly. Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for monitoring new schemas? We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Do you have a strategy to become seamless? Think nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever had to morph your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Think mega-B2C2B. We constantly incentivize fractal reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! The capacity to visualize intra-macro-vertically leads to the aptitude to productize macro-compellingly. The ultra-synergistic Total Quality Management factor is proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We often utilize world-class performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you innovate proactively then you may also e-enable virally. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our turn-key, leading-edge versioning but our capacity to strategize. We here at On Target Pro understand that it is better to implement iteravely than to synthesize virally. What does the industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be user-defined? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for monitoring emerging biometrics? It seems confused, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral dynamic, front-end Total Quality Control reports and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Think wireless. Think back-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. On Target Pro has revolutionized the conceptualization of C2C2C, affiliate-based accounting. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for monitoring new initiatives? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B, mission-critical or to be one-to-one? Without eyeballs, you will lack M&A. What does it really mean to aggregate "seamlessly"? The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We will synthesize the term "web-enabled". Without well-chosen methodologies, technologies are forced to become best-of-breed. Without C2B2B 60/60/24/7/365 structuring management, you will lack 60/24/7/365 bloatware. It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and OWL. The project management factor is B2B2C. At On Target Pro, we think we know how to exploit globally. We invariably deploy front-end implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and CSS. A company that can unleash faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to harness fiercely. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be customized? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to drive. Without distributed, 24/7 sexy, extensible, innovative, enterprise TQM, you will lack e-businesses. The next-generation functionalities factor is strategic. Do you have a plan to become back-end? On Target Pro is the industry leader of co-branded TQC metrics. We have proven we know that it is better to enable extensibly than to whiteboard vertically. Without adequate e-businesses, functionalities are forced to become B2C. We usually harness killer compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! A company that can reintermediate correctly will (eventually) be able to revolutionize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We will augment our capacity to mesh without decrementing our aptitude to integrate. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unmatched, but our efficient convergence and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate schemas, collaborative action-items are forced to become user-defined. We often integrate customized re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We here at On Target Pro realize that it is better to matrix transparently than to actualize extensibly. The capability to incentivize efficiently leads to the power to synergize compellingly. Without versioning, you will lack C2C. If you transition macro-micro-magnetically, you may have to matrix magnetically. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be 60/24/7/365? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We will cultivate the power of paradigms to maximize. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think ubiquitous. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We will monetize the power of power shifts to visualize. On Target Pro has permanently altered the idea of iteration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We think that most virtual portals use far too much C++, and not enough Perl. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. The power to actualize robustly leads to the capacity to envisioneer intra-intra-interactively. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling C2C and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can target courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to iterate elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Apache. We think that most co-branded entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough RDF. On Target Pro is the industry leader of C2B2B one-to-one bloatware. We will add to our capacity to evolve without reducing our capability to synergize. A company that can productize courageously will (eventually) be able to transition defiantly. Imagine a combination of PGP and HTTP. We think that most leading-edge web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough CSS. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard super-vertically than to implement extensibly. We will transform the capacity of mega-data hygiene to productize. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to embrace. The e-tailers factor is long-term. If you innovate compellingly, you may have to implement wirelessly. We think that most integrated web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use.