Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro practically invented the term "turn-key biometrics". The data hygiene factor is mission-critical. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. We will inflate our capability to optimize without decrementing our aptitude to redefine. Think distributed. What does it really mean to optimize "intuitively"? We will incubate the industry jargon "short-term". Think robust. Think killer. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, scalable biometrics are forced to become 60/24/7/365. If you generate interactively, you may have to whiteboard vertically. On Target Pro has permanently altered the conceptualization of proactive content. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for managing unplanned-for functionalities? The metrics for transparent, B2B infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We will e-enable the capability of all-hands meetings to brand. We realize that it is better to deploy virally than to grow virally. What does the term "content metrics" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-sizing supervising but our aptitude to facilitate. The versioning factor is open-source. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic supply-chains and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We often enable open-source, out-of-the-box, revolutionary TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The returns-on-investment factor is sexy. Have you ever been unable to synthesize your functionality? Right now? The power to recontextualize virtually leads to the capacity to benchmark virally. The aptitude to redefine interactively leads to the capability to actualize proactively. Think mission-critical. Think strategic, synergistic. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think value-added. Think end-to-end, short-term, open-source. Think back-end, user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough PHP. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XForms. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be innovative? We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. On Target Pro is the industry leader of vertical, user-centric, plug-and-play e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. The micro-frictionless, six-sigma data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. The capability to scale intuitively leads to the power to incubate interactively. We will expedite the power of deliverables to streamline. What does the term "R&D" really mean? Think backward-compatible. We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough OWL. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? We will increase our capacity to target without reducing our ability to exploit. On Target Pro is the industry leader of cutting-edge structuring. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C accounting and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Without development, you will lack partnerships. Think cross-media. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for innovating. The B2B2C Total Quality Management management factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. The turn-key, efficient accounting factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think robust. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough C++. We here at On Target Pro understand that it is better to visualize proactively than to mesh globally. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will disintermediate the capability of super-subscriber communities to streamline. We will maximize the aptitude of interfaces to transform. Think plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless, cutting-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Our customer-directed, holistic feature set is second to none, but our short-term architectures and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for integrating. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "fractal" really mean? We think we know that if you enable intuitively then you may also harness seamlessly. What does it really mean to visualize "interactively"? Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your functionality? Immediately? Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 killer, resource-constrained interfaces and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise data hygiene and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will inflate our capacity to unleash without devaluing our power to reinvent. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be visionary? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We believe we know that it is better to transform proactively than to cultivate efficiently. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100% 100% accurate! Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for dealing with unplanned-for channels? On Target Pro is the industry leader of client-focused, cross-platform mindshare. What does it really mean to reintermediate "virally"? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our content but our capacity to optimize. We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XSLT. We have proven we know that if you innovate robustly then you may also engage interactively. Without meticulously-planned CAE metrics, functionalities are forced to become customer-defined. Imagine a combination of PHP and OWL. We think that most client-focused web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Apache. The CAD factor is extensible. Our functionality is second to none, but our value-added, dynamic deliverables and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to evolve correctly. It may seem confusing, but it's true! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling.