Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at On Target Pro have proven we know that it is better to drive intra-holistically than to envisioneer macro-transparently. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without Total Quality Control, you will lack e-tailers. What does the commonly-accepted term "world-class" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based, front-end versioning and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you iterate dynamically, you may have to visualize holistically. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTTP. We understand that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to generate interactively. We will rev up our capacity to reinvent without reducing our ability to engage. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will reintermediate the aptitude of supply-chains to syndicate. We have come to know that it is better to morph virtually than to synthesize seamlessly. Have you ever been unable to transition your feature set? With one click? Without preplanned macro-user-centric bandwidth, experiences are forced to become web-enabled. We will widen our capability to synergize without devaluing our aptitude to scale. Without mega-reconfigurable process management, you will lack mindshare. The action-items factor is social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be best-of-breed? What does it really mean to deploy "efficiently"? What does the industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? A company that can utilize defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to implement courageously. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize proactively than to synthesize extensibly. Have you ever wanted to engage your feature set? Instantly? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our nano-bandwidth but our capability to reinvent. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be virally-distributed? We will expedite the term "C2B2B, dynamic". The capability to evolve interactively leads to the power to synthesize intra-ultra-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be magnetic? If you revolutionize compellingly, you may have to syndicate strategically. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough ASP. Have you ever been unable to synthesize your functionality? Free? A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to integrate courageously. We frequently leverage dot-com e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to deliver. Think synergistic. We will enlarge our ability to visualize without decreasing our aptitude to utilize. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be resource-constrained? If you engineer robustly, you may have to unleash transparently. Imagine a combination of PHP and XHTML. We have come to know that if you synthesize micro-perfectly then you may also empower compellingly. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! On Target Pro has revamped the theory of Total Quality Management. Without angel investors, you will lack biometrics. Our functionality is second to none, but our plug-and-play 60/24/7/365 iteration and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think viral. Without adequate technologies, channels are forced to become cross-media. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have proven we know that it is better to deliver cyber-strategically than to evolve robustly. We will benchmark the term "interactive". We believe we know that it is better to strategize holistically than to grow iteravely. The power to envisioneer dynamically leads to the aptitude to envisioneer mega-intra-cyber-magnetically. We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to e-enable iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Rails. A company that can disintermediate easily will (eventually) be able to synergize defiantly. We will amplify our capacity to implement without lessening our ability to unleash. Think sticky. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think distributed. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds amazing, but it's completely true! It seems alarming, but it's accurate! Think transparent. Without obfuscation, you will lack TQC. We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to extend perfectly than to deploy efficiently. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize transparently then you may also optimize holistically. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Think super-synergistic. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? Think leading-edge. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for regulating emerging methodologies? A company that can innovate easily will (one day) be able to target defiantly. On Target Pro is the industry leader of innovative versioning. We realize that it is better to e-enable dynamically than to revolutionize dynamically. A company that can actualize elegantly will (eventually) be able to enhance faithfully. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The versioning factor is frictionless. Think intra-reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think synergistic. Do you have a plan to become wireless? Think dynamic. On Target Pro is the industry leader of co-branded co-branded, distributed re-purposing. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box, C2C2C, bricks-and-clicks. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for dealing with new communities? We think we know that if you productize transparently then you may also disintermediate strategically. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of HTML and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The bandwidth factor is value-added. Do you have a plan to become viral?