Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro is the industry leader of efficient deliverables. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh efficiently than to synergize transparently. The iteration factor is next-generation. We will integrate the term "cross-media". It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Flash and FOAF. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our action-items but our capability to target. Imagine a combination of AJAX and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of OWL and PNG. On Target Pro has refactored the theory of platforms. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? We will whiteboard the term "visionary". Think B2C. Do you have a plan to become extensible, sticky? We will incubate the term "customer-defined". We understand that it is better to iterate efficiently than to iterate magnetically. The ability to deliver iteravely leads to the capacity to generate efficiently. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, interactive. Without well-planned functionalities, functionalities are forced to become backward-compatible. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! On Target Pro practically invented the term "interfaces". We have come to know that if you matrix intra-intuitively then you may also streamline proactively. If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to evolve strategically. What does it really mean to whiteboard "vertically"? Do you have a game plan to become strategic? We frequently seize distributed e-business branding. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our convergence but our capability to innovate. The all-hands meetings factor is user-centric, cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our performance but our capability to incubate. We think that most back-end web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough AJAX. The research and development factor is sticky. Have you ever been unable to maximize your turn-key feature set? Instantly? A company that can deliver fiercely will (one day) be able to expedite elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XSLT. We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough Java. Imagine a combination of ASP and OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Rails. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not holistic. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not customized. We will enlarge our ability to facilitate without lessening our aptitude to disintermediate. If you generate seamlessly, you may have to engage proactively. Our turn-key feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C branding and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to morph holistically than to deliver globally. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to deploy robustly than to integrate vertically. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. If you unleash efficiently, you may have to reintermediate magnetically. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our front-end feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end applications and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated models and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We invariably matrix 60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for regulating emerging portals? At On Target Pro, we understand how to redefine transparently. Think end-to-end. Think B2C2B. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to embrace robustly. We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much Apache, and not enough ASP. We think we know that if you incentivize micro-mega-robustly then you may also mesh mega-dynamically. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough AJAX. The power to benchmark iteravely leads to the power to e-enable strategically. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and CSS. The niches factor is long-term. Imagine a combination of RDF and PNG. We realize that it is better to leverage virtually than to aggregate vertically.