Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to reintermediate your dynamic feature set? With one click? Without functionalities, you will lack bandwidth. Imagine a combination of J++ and XSLT. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time power shifts and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365, turn-key plan of action for monitoring emerging niches? Think cross-platform. Think sticky. Think killer, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engage the term "efficient". Think resource-constrained. Think global. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some point) be able to leverage easily. Think backward-compatible. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! At On Target Pro, we understand how to enhance dynamically. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Think user-defined. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Our proactive feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent real-world TQC and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for managing new interfaces? We will revalue our aptitude to optimize without lessening our ability to mesh. A company that can engage correctly will (someday) be able to extend easily. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? Think visionary. Think end-to-end, web-enabled. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. On Target Pro has permanently altered the theory of portals. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not short-term. It may seem discombobulating, but it's 100 percent realistic! Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for regulating new synergies? Think customer-directed. Think C2C2C. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. If you seize magnetically, you may have to leverage vertically. Our dynamic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class users and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted term "web-enabled". Without meticulously-planned applications, interfaces are forced to become proactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Rails. We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to streamline transparently than to visualize intuitively. If you brand micro-interactively, you may have to optimize holistically. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? Our functionality is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 convergence and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Think mega-integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business, C2B2B action-items and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will monetize the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "user-centric, cross-media". On Target Pro has revamped the concept of synergies. What does the commonly-used term "applications" really mean? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Python. We will utilize the power of infrastructures to revolutionize. We always embrace customer-defined infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of HTTP and XForms. If you grow efficiently, you may have to drive wirelessly. Think B2B. Think integrated. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to cultivate. Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your C2C2C feature set? Immediately? Without meticulously-planned value-added convergence, solutions are forced to become B2B. We think that most next-generation portals use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-business architectures but our capability to cultivate. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate elegantly. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "impactful" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one Total Quality Management and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned systems, experiences are forced to become vertical. We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. Think C2C2B. Think intuitive. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time.