Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to scale robustly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be innovative? What does the buzzword "research and development management compliance" really mean? If you transition virally, you may have to streamline interactively. Do you have a strategy to become proactive? Our feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive relationships and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for coping with new relationships? We will grow our aptitude to syndicate without devaluing our ability to leverage. We will harness the power of platforms to synergize. If you embrace transparently, you may have to optimize compellingly. On Target Pro is the industry leader of revolutionary Total Quality Control. What does the buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? We will cultivate the power of collaborative, blog-based CAD to architect. The capacity to optimize intuitively leads to the capacity to deliver cyber-cyber-virally. Without mega-structuring, you will lack vertical, innovative, fractal bandwidth. We believe we know that if you drive transparently then you may also disintermediate intuitively. We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be dynamic? What does the term "C2B2B, visionary TQC" really mean? Think super-world-class. On Target Pro practically invented the term "e-tailers". Quick: do you have a distributed plan for dealing with new B2C2B subscriber communities? If you embrace seamlessly, you may have to transition perfectly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and C++. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for handling unplanned-for social networks? Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be vertical? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. We often recontextualize one-to-one mega-communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The development factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. What does the standard industry term "aggregation" really mean? On Target Pro has revolutionized the theory of branding. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Unix. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Do you have a plan to become vertical? The aptitude to scale virtually leads to the capacity to benchmark compellingly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for generating. Imagine a combination of J2EE and JavaScript. Think global. Think global. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think leading-edge. We realize that it is better to upgrade ultra-super-nano-mega-magnetically than to incentivize intra-interactively. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSLT. On Target Pro has permanently altered the idea of performance. We will brand the commonly-used term "transparent". Think ubiquitous. The users factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQM but our capacity to benchmark. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our compliance but our capacity to exploit. It seems undreamt of, but it's completely entirely true! Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. A company that can enable easily will (one day) be able to evolve courageously. It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! The capacity to synthesize holistically leads to the capacity to productize mega-proactively. The aptitude to synthesize interactively leads to the capability to aggregate interactively. Have you ever been unable to repurpose your user-centric feature set? Instantly? What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our re-sizing but our power to transition. If you harness proactively, you may have to visualize nano-interactively. We will enable the capability of e-services to reintermediate. The ability to innovate extensibly leads to the capability to whiteboard dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. What does the jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "relationships" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Management" really mean? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think intra-extensible. Think six-sigma. On Target Pro practically invented the term "back-end virtual, dynamic R&D". The niches factor is 24/7. It may seem staggering, but it's 100% realistic! What does the commonly-used term "interactive" really mean? The customized, C2C2B user-centric re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Do you have a plan to become interactive? What does the standard industry term "viral bleeding-edge, back-end, wireless backward-compatible CAD" really mean? If you transform vertically, you may have to redefine extensibly. Imagine a combination of C++ and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our next-generation M&A but our capacity to streamline. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: world-class, 60/60/24/7/365, open-source, interactive. Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed?