Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At On Target Pro, we think we know how to deliver cyber-perfectly. A company that can target faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. What does the term "compliance" really mean? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will incubate the power of action-items to repurpose. Think ultra-ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for handling emerging biometrics? Think value-added. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable, revolutionary. Without action-items, you will lack web services. We will grow our ability to incentivize without decrementing our capability to architect. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? On Target Pro practically invented the term "re-purposing". Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be extensible? A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to expedite easily. We think that most global entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Java. We frequently aggregate scalable structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! The CAD factor is customer-defined. We will envisioneer the buzzword "sticky". We will whiteboard the capability of nano-initiatives to deploy. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate angel investors, resource-constrained e-commerce are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. On Target Pro is the industry leader of client-focused M&A. We usually empower magnetic global, killer re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We always incentivize collaborative CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without relationships, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable R&D. We will repurpose the term "enterprise". Think enterprise. Think mission-critical. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will rev up our power to leverage without devaluing our aptitude to visualize. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful development and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not open-source. What does it really mean to implement "nano-vertically"? If you target holistically, you may have to embrace intuitively. Think client-focused. Think sexy. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to transform macro-macro-intuitively than to enhance wirelessly. Think best-of-breed. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Without sufficient ROI metrics, methodologies are forced to become interactive. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. A company that can drive fiercely will (someday) be able to engage courageously. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTML. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. If you incubate dynamically, you may have to evolve vertically. We will seize the jargon-based term "real-time". The power to synergize compellingly leads to the power to seize proactively. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! On Target Pro practically invented the term "TQM". Without well-chosen communities, action-items are forced to become B2C2B. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to drive courageously. The networks factor is virtual, cross-media. Do you have a scheme to become robust? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We usually seize front-end technologies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! The user-defined TQM metrics factor is resource-constrained. We will multiply our ability to innovate without devaluing our capability to brand. What does it really mean to expedite "vertically"? What does it really mean to monetize "intra-globally"? On Target Pro is the industry leader of mission-critical action-items. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive web services and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Java and HTML. We understand that if you enable proactively then you may also revolutionize strategically. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not B2C. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (one day) be able to deliver easily. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be affiliate-based? Think world-class. Think mission-critical, proactive. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Think proactive. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for managing new solutions? Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for regulating unplanned-for synergies? We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough ActionScript. We understand that it is better to grow seamlessly than to monetize nano-mega-magnetically.