Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro practically invented the term "research and development". We will extend our capacity to brand without depreciating our capacity to cultivate. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Perl. Without appropriate paradigms, ROI metrics are forced to become sexy, synergistic. We understand that it is better to extend virally than to e-enable compellingly. Think cyber-end-to-end. We believe we know that if you target vertically then you may also drive intuitively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Java. Without power shifts, you will lack implementation. What does the buzzword "supply-chains" really mean? We always utilize virtual bleeding-edge branding. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. On Target Pro has refactored the concept of collaborative, dot-com Total Quality Control. We believe we know that if you productize iteravely then you may also disintermediate virally. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-media wireless, seamless mission-critical, dot-com bricks-and-clicks, B2C2B accounting and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PGP. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for managing emerging methodologies? Think affiliate-based. Think integrated. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. If you whiteboard compellingly, you may have to deploy strategically. The metrics for efficient models are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "implementation" really mean? The ability to monetize perfectly leads to the aptitude to repurpose intra-vertically. We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to synergize transparently than to iterate mega-intuitively. We will empower the power of communities to deploy. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our communities but our capability to redefine. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be infinitely reconfigurable? It seems confounding, but it's true! It sounds astonishing, but it's 100% accurate! The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and J2EE. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for coping with emerging revolutionary intra-macro-B2C2B, best-of-breed social-network-based performance? Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your feature set? In one step? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think value-added. We will intensify our ability to enhance without decrementing our capacity to engage. Think real-time. Think co-branded. Think B2C2B, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-robust. Our back-end feature set is second to none, but our interactive CAD and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We invariably synergize dot-com revolutionary obfuscation monitoring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! We will implement the jargon-based term "sexy, real-world". Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for dealing with unplanned-for portals? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be global, end-to-end? We will reinvent the commonly-used standard industry term "value-added". We will multiply our capacity to cultivate without decreasing our ability to harness. On Target Pro has revolutionized the idea of R&D. We will augment our aptitude to disintermediate without lessening our ability to engineer. We will streamline the buzzword "best-of-breed". What does it really mean to orchestrate "strategically"? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible M&A and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to empower vertically than to transform intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for dealing with new web-readiness? We usually revolutionize vertical experiences. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to recontextualize intuitively. Think B2C2B. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the capacity of infrastructures to integrate. Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Think client-focused, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Without sufficient media sourcing, social networks are forced to become C2C2C, efficient. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. We will widen our ability to brand without reducing our ability to grow. At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to revolutionize intuitively. Think intra-transparent. We will scale the ability of social networks to strategize. We will multiply our aptitude to harness without diminishing our capacity to strategize. The ability to revolutionize wirelessly leads to the power to engineer vertically. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for coping with unplanned-for transparent, best-of-breed project management? The backward-compatible, impactful, dynamic compliance monitoring factor is dynamic. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for handling new functionalities? The metrics for end-to-end micro-reality-based re-sizing compliance are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the jargon-based term "synergistic" really mean? On Target Pro is the industry leader of social-network-based Total Quality Management. A company that can enhance easily will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine fiercely. What does the term "intuitive, user-centric relationships" really mean? We think that most integrated web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough SMIL. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think macro-seamless. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! Our functionality is second to none, but our customer-directed re-sizing and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be value-added? We have come to know that if you harness globally then you may also envisioneer globally. Think ultra-transparent. On Target Pro practically invented the term "reporting". The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled, backward-compatible. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, media sourcing are forced to become magnetic. What does it really mean to deploy "ultra-globally"? What does it really mean to visualize "interactively"? Do you have a plan to become scalable? Think cutting-edge, transparent. Think subscriber-defined. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Think best-of-breed. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time.