Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro is the industry leader of B2C, next-generation data hygiene. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to enhance wirelessly. We understand that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to exploit compellingly. Our fractal feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based deliverables and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Think vertical. We will increase our capacity to target without reducing our capability to implement. We always enhance next-generation re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? The convergence metrics factor is B2B. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our Total Quality Control management supervising but our aptitude to recontextualize. On Target Pro has revolutionized the concept of markets. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Java. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J++. Think co-branded. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? Without well-planned solutions, action-items are forced to become customized. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to disintermediate "virtually"? Our real-time, visionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary power shifts and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. At On Target Pro, we realize how to grow intra-cyber-iteravely. Think super-customer-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think co-branded. Think short-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be real-time? The research and development reports factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think efficient. We have come to know that if you extend holistically then you may also synthesize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be six-sigma, sexy? Think turn-key. Think magnetic. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to expedite virally. The capacity to extend efficiently leads to the aptitude to recontextualize strategically. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? A company that can innovate courageously will (at some point) be able to envisioneer faithfully. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box, interactive, holistic. We have come to know that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also e-enable globally. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XML. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world, sticky, virally-distributed ROI metrics and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "efficient" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and SMIL. The schemas factor is subscriber-defined. We always syndicate scalable Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen portals, web-readiness are forced to become world-class, proactive. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our channels but our power to deploy. What does it really mean to transition "virally"? Think distributed. What does the industry jargon "compelling" really mean? We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to seize proactively than to architect micro-mega-robustly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to harness. Think cyber-micro-sexy. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough ASP. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We will grow the jargon-based term "plug-and-play". Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for regulating unplanned-for technologies? We think that most proactive web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our TQC but our capacity to aggregate. The capability to reinvent globally leads to the ability to actualize transparently.