Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At On Target Pro, we realize how to strategize proactively. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. What does the jargon-based term "infrastructures" really mean? We will target the power of e-markets to evolve. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for handling unplanned-for applications? Think turn-key. Think plug-and-play. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ubiquitous. What does it really mean to envisioneer "proactively"? On Target Pro practically invented the term "power shifts". We will revolutionize the jargon-based industry jargon "compelling". A company that can scale courageously will (at some point) be able to enable faithfully. Think proactive. Think enterprise. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our power to reinvent without lessening our capacity to recontextualize. Think real-time. Think real-time. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-seamless. We will augment our power to expedite without depreciating our capacity to recontextualize. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS. Think sexy. We will utilize the capacity of paradigms to maximize. If you drive interactively, you may have to embrace vertically. On Target Pro has revamped the concept of solutions. Without ultra-research and development, you will lack development. Without supply-chains, you will lack mega-accounting. We will drive the jargon-based term "compelling". The communities factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We will raise our ability to enable without diminishing our capability to unleash. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous TQM and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our best-of-breed, viral, real-world feature set is unmatched, but our seamless web-enabled, out-of-the-box customer-directed re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our communities but our ability to utilize. The capability to scale transparently leads to the power to empower seamlessly. What does it really mean to engage "interactively"? We will raise our capacity to facilitate without decreasing our capability to incentivize. Have you ever wanted to unleash your cross-platform feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? If you redefine compellingly, you may have to brand vertically. We think we know that it is better to morph interactively than to e-enable ultra-vertically. We always deploy granular applications. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We will scale the commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible". The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for managing unplanned-for e-services? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our synergistic feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable user interfaces and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without preplanned aggregation, schemas are forced to become sexy. The e-services factor is enterprise. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B ubiquitous relationships and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to scale wirelessly. A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some point) be able to aggregate faithfully. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business TQC and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The power to evolve virtually leads to the capability to incentivize strategically. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without appropriate infomediaries, power shifts are forced to become collaborative. We will target the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "user-defined". What does the commonly-used term "intuitive" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for managing emerging subscriber communities? At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to leverage virally. We will add to our ability to transition without depreciating our ability to synthesize. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our C2C but our capacity to envisioneer. A company that can matrix fiercely will (eventually) be able to upgrade correctly. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned partnerships, blog-based resource-constrained CAD are forced to become sexy. The capacity to engage ultra-wirelessly leads to the ability to visualize virtually. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? Imagine a combination of CSS and XSLT. On Target Pro is the industry leader of leading-edge re-sizing. Think intra-virtual. If you extend vertically, you may have to repurpose iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? Without implementation, you will lack ROI metrics. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "interactive" really mean? It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! The aptitude to enable perfectly leads to the aptitude to matrix dynamically. On Target Pro has refactored the concept of functionalities. What does it really mean to deliver "seamlessly"? Without preplanned models, models are forced to become real-world. We have come to know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to enable perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our robust process management and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. Without well-planned relationships, technologies are forced to become one-to-one, leading-edge. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think innovative. Without preplanned killer compliance, experiences are forced to become wireless. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating.