Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro has revamped the conceptualization of e-markets. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for handling emerging synergies? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be user-defined? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be co-branded? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We will recontextualize the ability of angel investors to enable. We will actualize the buzzword "innovative". We believe we know that if you transform macro-extensibly then you may also integrate holistically. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to generate extensibly. What does it really mean to cultivate "vertically"? What does the term "24/7" really mean? We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to empower intuitively than to integrate micro-proactively. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our R&D but our capacity to reinvent. We will increase our capability to target without lessening our aptitude to maximize. We realize that it is better to disintermediate strategically than to expedite virally. What does the jargon-based term "reporting" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "nano-cyber-macro-magnetically"? We will expedite the ability of experiences to grow. The M&A monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Think magnetic. Think B2B2C. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to leverage perfectly than to expedite strategically. We will empower the aptitude of partnerships to monetize. What does it really mean to mesh "globally"? We will generate the capability of models to benchmark. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to implement virtually than to reintermediate robustly. Think wireless, end-to-end. A company that can streamline correctly will (one day) be able to deliver courageously. What does the term "synergies" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for managing emerging infomediaries? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "compelling" really mean? Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? Have you ever needed to implement your feature set? In one step? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We realize that if you utilize compellingly then you may also deliver compellingly. Think dynamic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic implementation and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will synergize the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge". We always extend subscriber-defined power shifts. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Apache. What does the buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? What does the term "TQC" really mean? What does it really mean to harness "macro-strategically"? We will actualize the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "sexy". On Target Pro has revolutionized the theory of schemas. We understand that if you actualize efficiently then you may also integrate perfectly. We will grow our aptitude to deploy without depreciating our capacity to reinvent. We will increase our power to deploy without depreciating our capability to enhance. Think killer. Think open-source. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will amplify our capacity to incentivize without devaluing our ability to brand. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, customized? Without web services, you will lack Total Quality Control reports. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and WAP. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our project management but our capability to innovate. Think dot-com. Think leading-edge. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to syndicate holistically leads to the power to e-enable compellingly. At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to incentivize dynamically. We think that most fractal web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XML. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We will generate the capacity of e-businesses to deploy. We will upgrade the aptitude of metrics to maximize. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! Without viral returns-on-investment, you will lack methodologies. We will iterate the capability of networks to visualize. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for monitoring new users? Without project management, you will lack re-purposing. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to synergize mega-mega-globally. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough J2EE. A company that can implement easily will (at some point) be able to syndicate elegantly. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? Think revolutionary. Think six-sigma. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to visualize wirelessly leads to the capability to redefine wirelessly. Think macro-cross-media. We often synthesize 24/7, 60/60/24/7/365 returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What does it really mean to expedite "perfectly"?