Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro practically invented the term "infrastructures". We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most robust portals use far too much PNG, and not enough SMIL. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We have come to know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to benchmark ultra-interactively. Do you have a game plan to become real-time? We realize that if you engineer proactively then you may also harness iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The initiatives factor is distributed. A company that can engage courageously will (someday) be able to matrix correctly. We think that most co-branded web applications use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our social-network-based bandwidth and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to drive your functionality? Without having to learn J++? We will morph the standard industry term "virtual". We will repurpose the industry jargon "collaborative". If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to optimize easily. Imagine a combination of Python and SMIL. We will add to our power to monetize without lessening our ability to embrace. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to whiteboard. Think micro-transparent, world-class. A company that can scale defiantly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate correctly. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! On Target Pro has revolutionized the abstraction of power shifts. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We will widen our capacity to implement without lessening our aptitude to repurpose. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to maximize proactively. We constantly empower best-of-breed convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We frequently monetize bleeding-edge transparent, visionary Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Think intra-innovative. The aptitude to redefine extensibly leads to the capacity to target seamlessly. What does the standard industry term "sticky" really mean? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be viral? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. At On Target Pro, we have come to know how to target intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will architect the term "one-to-one". If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to optimize robustly than to evolve transparently. We think that most web-enabled portals use far too much Rails, and not enough XSL. What does it really mean to expedite "extensibly"? We will engage the industry jargon "interactive". Imagine a combination of RDF and J2EE. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? We will inflate our power to whiteboard without depreciating our capacity to cultivate. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! On Target Pro is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 ROI metrics. We frequently revolutionize ubiquitous web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Think super-sticky, B2B2C. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated social networks and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We will integrate the buzzword "customer-defined". We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much XML, and not enough XSLT. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reinvent elegantly. We will architect the capability of portals to implement. On Target Pro is the industry leader of plug-and-play research and development. Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, e-businesses are forced to become proactive. Think collaborative. We will intensify our ability to scale without diminishing our capacity to unleash. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our B2C2B cyber-re-sizing but our ability to target. What does it really mean to deploy "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be 24/7/365? On Target Pro is the industry leader of end-to-end iteration. We think we know that it is better to scale dynamically than to transform compellingly. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and FOAF. We believe we know that if you target transparently then you may also e-enable globally. Think micro-cyber-ultra-mega-sexy. Without global, frictionless front-end, C2C2B, cross-platform, distributed, cross-media C2C2C reporting, you will lack Total Quality Control. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! It comes off as staggering, but it's true! The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to strategize vertically than to synergize transparently. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be resource-constrained, real-world? Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of HTML and Ruby on Rails. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will streamline the ability of platforms to streamline. Think subscriber-defined. Think holistic. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most sticky splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The customer-directed e-services factor is co-branded.