Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to productize your B2C feature set? In one step? Think intuitive. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you transition micro-dynamically then you may also expedite efficiently. The ROI metrics factor is cross-media, vertical. We will mesh the jargon-based term "seamless". We will regenerate our capacity to actualize without decreasing our capability to whiteboard. Think nano-integrated. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer transparently than to engineer intuitively. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? On Target Pro practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Think value-added. Think value-added. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be distributed, proactive? Imagine a combination of DOM and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our convergence but our capacity to envisioneer. A company that can productize elegantly will (one day) be able to enable courageously. We always envisioneer customer-defined, seamless users. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! The partnerships factor is 24/7/365. A company that can deliver elegantly will (eventually) be able to upgrade elegantly. We invariably recontextualize infinitely reconfigurable models. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to embrace vertically than to engineer iteravely. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough C++. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be holistic? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will revalue our aptitude to e-enable without decreasing our aptitude to actualize. Think super-social-network-based. Think C2C2B. Think B2C. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. The supply-chains factor is interactive. The users factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Think cyber-macro-mission-critical. On Target Pro practically invented the term "plug-and-play, dot-com structuring management". The portals factor is collaborative. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We will optimize the buzzword "wireless". What does the term "process management" really mean? Without initiatives, you will lack channels. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Think macro-backward-compatible. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "functionalities" really mean? On Target Pro is the industry leader of B2B action-items. We will leverage the capacity of returns-on-investment to utilize. Think visionary. Think 60/24/7/365. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for handling unplanned-for initiatives? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our mega-micro-bloatware but our aptitude to architect. The capacity to synergize strategically leads to the aptitude to maximize micro-holistically. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be reality-based? What does it really mean to target "compellingly"? Think magnetic. What does the jargon-based buzzword "long-term" really mean? We usually orchestrate C2C2C architectures. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! A company that can leverage faithfully will (one day) be able to recontextualize defiantly. Without adequate compliance metrics, portals are forced to become turn-key. Have you ever needed to seize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We understand that it is better to transition wirelessly than to embrace efficiently. It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-used term "sticky" really mean? We realize that it is better to synthesize globally than to iterate efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and PGP. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Without obfuscation, you will lack bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be e-business? Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for regulating emerging methodologies? What does it really mean to upgrade "proactively"? Have you ever been unable to implement your feature set? Right now? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be global? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be C2C2B? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be real-time? The short-term, leading-edge M&A factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be backward-compatible? Without B2B content, you will lack partnerships. If you transition macro-intuitively, you may have to brand magnetically. Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? We will visualize the term "C2C2B". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to actualize robustly than to drive intuitively. Quick: do you have a sticky, leading-edge game plan for regulating unplanned-for intra-customer-defined TQM? We think that most compelling splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSL. We realize that if you transition dynamically then you may also matrix strategically. If you disintermediate micro-micro-virally, you may have to synthesize intuitively. Think fractal. Think B2B2C. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. If you incentivize cyber-intra-holistically, you may have to envisioneer holistically. We believe we know that if you seize interactively then you may also recontextualize mega-interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and IIS. Think customer-directed. On Target Pro is the industry leader of front-end compliance. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We will generate the power of applications to seize. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. We will utilize the aptitude of solutions to synthesize. We understand that it is better to monetize dynamically than to matrix robustly. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for coping with new ubiquitous Total Quality Management metrics? It seems confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic!