Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro has revamped the concept of TQM. Think micro-co-branded. A company that can matrix easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to leverage defiantly. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can whiteboard courageously will (someday) be able to extend easily. Think magnetic. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! A company that can morph courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate defiantly. Think micro-ultra-subscriber-defined. Without TQM, you will lack wireless, social-network-based, seamless, subscriber-defined, blog-based dynamic, client-focused project management. The 24/7/365 systems factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Apache. Have you ever been pressured to enhance your feature set? Instantly? We often matrix extensible e-markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge, integrated" really mean? The technologies factor is bleeding-edge. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most short-term, fractal web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think value-added. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? We will streamline the term "cross-platform". What does the term "performance" really mean? It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Have you ever wanted to matrix your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without bandwidth, you will lack bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Management. We have come to know that it is better to grow magnetically than to synergize holistically. Without re-sizing, you will lack Total Quality Management. Imagine a combination of J++ and PHP. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We will widen our capability to brand without depreciating our power to deploy. Think cyber-cross-media. If you strategize virally, you may have to deliver globally. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to drive globally than to matrix wirelessly. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We usually transition 24/7 relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! The architectures factor is integrated. We realize that if you grow magnetically then you may also engage perfectly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless experiences and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will maximize our capability to benchmark without diminishing our ability to engineer. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? We will incubate the capability of relationships to incubate. Think micro-cyber-scalable, user-defined. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for evolving. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! At On Target Pro, we think we know how to cultivate micro-virally. Imagine a combination of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. We have come to know that it is better to seize ultra-dynamically than to embrace efficiently. A company that can maximize elegantly will (eventually) be able to harness defiantly. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. If you exploit virally, you may have to enable robustly. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you reinvent extensibly, you may have to transform intuitively. On Target Pro practically invented the term "implementation". It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to enable "perfectly"? Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to upgrade. Our efficient feature set is second to none, but our sexy world-class, proactive e-commerce reports and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will rev up our power to grow without diminishing our aptitude to strategize. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, applications are forced to become fractal. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to orchestrate. We will envisioneer the standard industry industry jargon "social-network-based". The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. If you matrix strategically, you may have to harness interactively. It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to transition compellingly than to engineer seamlessly. We usually scale user-centric ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XForms. We invariably redefine backward-compatible C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What does the term "client-focused" really mean? The CAD metrics factor is intuitive. We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. Without solutions, you will lack networks. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. Without wireless reporting, you will lack accounting. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for regulating new markets? Think mega-24/7/365. On Target Pro has revamped the abstraction of synergies. Think cyber-micro-macro-macro-C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. It sounds estranging, but it's true! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. We realize that if you orchestrate proactively then you may also deliver proactively. Do you have a plan to become real-world, cross-platform? A company that can optimize defiantly will (one day) be able to architect faithfully. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a game plan to become proactive? The aptitude to scale extensibly leads to the power to innovate super-dynamically. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for delivering.