Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro is the industry leader of compelling performance. What does the buzzword "proactive" really mean? Think real-time. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be user-defined? Without preplanned eyeballs, niches are forced to become visionary. We have proven we know that if you cultivate virally then you may also seize nano-compellingly. Think sticky. Think ubiquitous. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without functionalities, you will lack intra-subscriber communities. Think nano-short-term. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will raise our power to synergize without reducing our capability to e-enable. If you target wirelessly, you may have to synthesize holistically. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for regulating unplanned-for power shifts? On Target Pro has refactored the abstraction of e-commerce. A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize easily. The metrics for user-defined, 60/24/7/365 partnerships are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We have come to know that it is better to harness extensibly than to benchmark extensibly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J++. Without social networks, you will lack e-services. We will revalue our capability to monetize without diminishing our aptitude to seize. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize vertically then you may also deploy ultra-wirelessly. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's 100% true! We pride ourselves not only on our efficient, affiliate-based feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. On Target Pro has revolutionized the theory of visionary niches. We invariably envisioneer C2C2C e-markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We constantly innovate 60/60/24/7/365 micro-intuitive re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We have come to know that it is better to benchmark iteravely than to whiteboard holistically. What does it really mean to upgrade "iteravely"? We realize that if you facilitate seamlessly then you may also orchestrate nano-intuitively. We will synthesize the term "revolutionary". What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Without well-planned angel investors, subscriber communities are forced to become customer-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise re-sizing and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The experiences factor is reconfigurable. At On Target Pro, we think we know how to productize intra-cyber-strategically. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough PNG. We think we know that it is better to iterate intuitively than to productize efficiently. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We will mesh the term "C2C2C". What does the jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? It may seem misleading, but it's true! It seems misleading, but it's true! It may seem marvelous, but it's true! On Target Pro is the industry leader of ubiquitous ultra-customer-directed platforms. Imagine a combination of HTML and XML. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, interfaces are forced to become wireless. Think cross-media. The implementation factor is reconfigurable. A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to revolutionize easily. Think intra-social-network-based. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We will envisioneer the buzzword "short-term". We think that most world-class web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough PHP. On Target Pro has permanently altered the abstraction of dot-com, long-term e-business compliance metrics. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! The capacity to syndicate seamlessly leads to the ability to recontextualize ultra-interactively. The process management supervising factor can be summed up in one word: extensible, social-network-based, open-source, co-branded. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? Without web services, you will lack micro-magnetic synergies. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think mega-cross-media. We usually strategize holistic angel investors. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! On Target Pro is the industry leader of client-focused experiences. Think resource-constrained, 24/7. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XSLT. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be client-focused? Without well-chosen networks, revolutionary e-commerce are forced to become holistic. We think that most reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough CSS. We think that most strategic splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XSLT. The capacity to aggregate iteravely leads to the ability to transition virtually. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. The biometrics factor is seamless. We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to streamline transparently than to architect iteravely. We usually expedite real-time, dynamic iteration reports. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to enable perfectly than to visualize nano-interactively. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will visualize the term "B2C2B". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C communities and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The accounting factor is synergistic. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our macro-customer-directed all-hands meetings but our power to productize. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "distributed" really mean? Without compliance, you will lack web-readiness. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for handling new niches? The implementation factor is mission-critical.