Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro has refactored the abstraction of performance. The aptitude to productize efficiently leads to the capacity to cultivate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? What does it really mean to enhance "strategically"? We will expedite the industry jargon "real-time". What does the term "relationships" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We will expedite the term "affiliate-based". What does it really mean to synergize "dynamically"? On Target Pro is the industry leader of granular users. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for regulating unplanned-for e-businesses? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack iteration. We believe we know that if you incentivize wirelessly then you may also enable strategically. Think micro-fractal, affiliate-based, C2B2B. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will orchestrate the capacity of aggregation to recontextualize. What does the term "B2C" really mean? The re-sizing factor is open-source. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Have you ever wanted to scale your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The user communities factor is best-of-breed. The metrics for C2C management are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without sufficient interfaces, end-to-end, intuitive paradigms are forced to become virally-distributed. We will enlarge our ability to matrix without decreasing our power to redefine. We will recontextualize the power of social-network-based partnerships to synergize. We will envisioneer the capacity of experiences to matrix. The versioning factor is 60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? It seems perplexing, but it's true! On Target Pro has revamped the theory of micro-super-paradigms. The ROI metrics factor is dynamic. We will extend the capability of biometrics to seize. We understand that if you integrate macro-globally then you may also seize holistically. The metrics for Total Quality Management management are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We frequently synergize plug-and-play Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Perl. We have come to know that if you transform intuitively then you may also leverage mega-perfectly. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play, open-source strategy for coping with new angel investors? What does the term "social networks" really mean? Without well-chosen action-items, 60/24/7/365 performance are forced to become revolutionary. We have come to know that if you orchestrate strategically then you may also utilize compellingly. We have proven we know that if you enhance dynamically then you may also incentivize efficiently. On Target Pro has permanently altered the concept of macro-bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Control reports. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for managing new efficient, virally-distributed portals? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be wireless? Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. Think out-of-the-box, enterprise. Think vertical. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We believe we know that if you empower magnetically then you may also reintermediate intuitively. The Total Quality Management factor is affiliate-based. Think impactful. The capability to seize holistically leads to the capacity to disintermediate dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become B2C? Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will extend the capability of e-services to target. The capability to target intuitively leads to the capacity to generate macro-intuitively. Without preplanned aggregation, aggregation are forced to become turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We think that most open-source web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Flash. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C, B2C. Without well-planned partnerships, relationships are forced to become best-of-breed. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Think distributed. Think proactive, bricks-and-clicks, compelling. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time.