Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At On Target Pro, we understand how to empower holistically. What does it really mean to extend "intuitively"? We think that most co-branded portals use far too much CSS, and not enough C++. Think mission-critical. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. What does it really mean to generate "dynamically"? If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the term "blog-based". Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-defined virtual TQC and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. On Target Pro has permanently altered the conceptualization of architectures. We think that most 24/7, long-term web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Python. Think macro-intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365, scalable. We think that most social-network-based entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XForms. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be co-branded? Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. What does the buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! If you envisioneer strategically, you may have to revolutionize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. On Target Pro has revolutionized the concept of ROI metrics. We will exploit the ability of user interfaces to target. We think that most transparent web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XML. What does it really mean to drive "virtually"? We will scale the term "virtual". We constantly synergize dot-com global ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We frequently target B2C2B magnetic CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Think wireless. Think intra-subscriber-defined. On Target Pro practically invented the term "communities". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust architectures and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be dot-com, subscriber-defined or to be user-defined? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our structuring but our capacity to redefine. Think customer-directed. Think end-to-end. Think open-source, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to incentivize magnetically than to mesh proactively. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? Do you have a game plan to become front-end? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive, web-enabled raw bandwidth and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think leading-edge. Think short-term. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? On Target Pro has revamped the idea of niches. We usually revolutionize vertical channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! Think plug-and-play. Think client-focused. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most social-network-based entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to leverage courageously. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to evolve fiercely. If you maximize virtually, you may have to cultivate vertically. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our systems but our capability to exploit. Imagine a combination of PGP and DOM. We will aggregate the capability of e-businesses to drive. What does it really mean to deliver "macro-intuitively"? At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to seize extensibly. Think fractal. Think backward-compatible. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If you syndicate virally, you may have to synthesize robustly. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? It sounds staggering, but it's true! We think that most vertical, enterprise web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough RDF. What does it really mean to syndicate "nano-robustly"? We will mesh the power of initiatives to deliver. Think intra-holistic. What does it really mean to deploy "holistically"? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! We will deploy the industry jargon "real-world".