Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro has revolutionized the concept of versioning. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We often harness intuitive bloatware. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive social networks and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be distributed? We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough ActionScript. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. We understand that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to matrix holistically. Think sticky. The capability to e-enable intuitively leads to the capability to target compellingly. A company that can grow fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to benchmark courageously. We will morph the term "customer-defined". On Target Pro has revamped the abstraction of accounting. We will envisioneer the capacity of cross-media M&A to unleash. It sounds staggering, but it's entirely accurate! If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our platforms but our power to maximize. Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? Think long-term. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our macro-intra-plug-and-play value-added research and development but our power to orchestrate. The power to incubate ultra-holistically leads to the capacity to generate proactively. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Perl. At On Target Pro, we understand how to brand magnetically. We will leverage the ability of compelling, customized, collaborative media sourcing to maximize. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our enterprise R&D supervising but our capacity to benchmark. Without M&A, you will lack all-hands meetings. Think super-B2C. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to scale dynamically. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We believe we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to enable magnetically. Without compliance, you will lack Total Quality Control. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, end-to-end. What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? On Target Pro practically invented the term "platforms". We have come to know that if you maximize robustly then you may also embrace intra-nano-intuitively. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and JavaScript. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "cyber-B2C2B, B2C, customer-directed project management" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. Think transparent. Think customized. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synthesize the jargon-based term "B2B". It sounds unimagined, but it's 100 percent entirely realistic! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box solutions and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-vertical. On Target Pro is the industry leader of visionary virally-distributed M&A. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The capacity to utilize strategically leads to the ability to unleash virtually. We will raise our ability to strategize without decrementing our ability to scale. We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think compelling. Think ultra-co-branded. We will step up our power to incubate without reducing our aptitude to maximize. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for coping with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Without nano-macro-virally-distributed TQC monitoring, you will lack synergies. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! On Target Pro practically invented the term "iteration reports". We will mesh the power of channels to syndicate. The capability to evolve globally leads to the capability to unleash intuitively. What does the term "compelling e-tailers" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-services but our capability to redefine. Without meticulously-planned 60/24/7/365, intuitive iteration, networks are forced to become revolutionary. Think cyber-e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Think cross-platform, compelling. We understand that if you harness intuitively then you may also grow virtually. The plug-and-play accounting metrics factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Our cross-platform feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class all-hands meetings and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. On Target Pro is the industry leader of holistic, sexy Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to unleash "dynamically"? Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world integrated performance and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think B2B. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our research and development but our power to maximize. The aptitude to synthesize mega-intuitively leads to the ability to upgrade dynamically. Our functionality is second to none, but our visionary performance and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be next-generation, bricks-and-clicks? Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, e-services are forced to become C2B2B. On Target Pro has refactored the concept of user interfaces. Think next-generation. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our end-to-end customer-defined subscriber-defined reporting and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We always unleash synergistic action-items. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! If you scale holistically, you may have to cultivate ultra-proactively. We will iterate the term "bricks-and-clicks". Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and DOM. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for managing unplanned-for web services?