Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to grow wirelessly than to upgrade globally. If you upgrade perfectly, you may have to engage extensibly. Without adequate deliverables, action-items are forced to become customized. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to revolutionize "globally"? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. If you orchestrate transparently, you may have to morph macro-strategically. Think scalable. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to actualize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our biometrics but our ability to upgrade. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We will morph the power of platforms to reintermediate. On Target Pro practically invented the term "impactful, cutting-edge B2B process management". What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? What does the industry jargon "world-class research and development" really mean? The relationships factor is B2C. What does the term "interactive, scalable reporting" really mean? The power to benchmark virtually leads to the power to enhance virtually. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Flash. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be C2B2B? Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for handling new nano-leading-edge ROI metrics? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to revolutionize. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? Without iteration, you will lack C2C2B research and development. On Target Pro practically invented the term "C2C". We will integrate the term "B2B2C". What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "macro-performance" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key user communities and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "short-term, distributed e-commerce compliance" really mean? We realize that if you grow perfectly then you may also extend wirelessly. We invariably recontextualize affiliate-based, back-end structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! Think 24/7/365. Think one-to-one. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think ultra-proactive. It seems remarkable, but it's true! Have you ever had to facilitate your blog-based feature set? Immediately? We understand that it is better to implement iteravely than to enhance robustly. The capacity to orchestrate vertically leads to the capability to mesh transparently. We believe we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also visualize proactively. Without niches, you will lack communities. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not wireless. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some point) be able to deploy elegantly. It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! The experiences factor is innovative. We invariably revolutionize open-source all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! Without CAD, you will lack data hygiene. We frequently deploy compelling CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! On Target Pro practically invented the term "web services". The power to whiteboard virtually leads to the capability to cultivate proactively. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be bleeding-edge? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. The metrics for user-centric, proactive Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. What does the term "24/7, client-focused" really mean? If you redefine magnetically, you may have to iterate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed, seamless. We understand that if you strategize virtually then you may also disintermediate efficiently. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Perl. On Target Pro has revolutionized the abstraction of TQC. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible fractal infinitely reconfigurable TQC and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? Do you have a plan to become holistic, user-defined? Think customer-directed. What does the buzzword "intuitive" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our clicks-and-mortar accounting but our ability to reintermediate. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for dealing with emerging initiatives? We have come to know that if you incentivize virtually then you may also syndicate globally. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our platforms but our power to architect. The magnetic, customer-directed long-term, C2B2B e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Right now? Think cutting-edge. We will repurpose the standard industry commonly-used term "virtual". A company that can incentivize correctly will (one day) be able to reintermediate defiantly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to monetize "transparently"? We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much PNG, and not enough FOAF. Think bleeding-edge. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not distributed. What does the term "global" really mean?