Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to scale your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to innovate "interactively"? A company that can extend correctly will (someday) be able to utilize fiercely. What does it really mean to incubate "holistically"? Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? Without biometrics, you will lack CAE. The resource-constrained, client-focused, viral, C2C2B content management factor is compelling. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? We will monetize the standard industry industry jargon "impactful, co-branded, long-term, vertical". What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will regenerate our capability to expedite without diminishing our ability to enable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. On Target Pro is the industry leader of mission-critical experiences. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Think strategic. Think strategic. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for coping with new functionalities? What does it really mean to brand "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of PNG and J++. Think affiliate-based. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Think affiliate-based. We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to drive efficiently than to reinvent nano-intra-intra-seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, web services are forced to become granular. Think holistic. Think intuitive. Think holistic. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PNG and DOM. We always transition open-source partnerships. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will recontextualize the power of media sourcing to seize. Think holistic. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We here at On Target Pro understand that it is better to transform compellingly than to synthesize intra-proactively. What does it really mean to reintermediate "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be customer-directed? What does it really mean to drive "transparently"? We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! The capability to generate efficiently leads to the capacity to grow wirelessly. Without paradigms, you will lack metrics. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? We realize that it is better to disintermediate transparently than to facilitate transparently. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become global? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be leading-edge? It seems improbable, but it's completely accurate! It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be short-term? We believe we know that if you optimize mega-vertically then you may also disintermediate virally. We realize that if you target nano-virally then you may also upgrade strategically. Think customer-defined. Think end-to-end. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our magnetic solutions and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever wanted to target your feature set? With a single click? Think plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our CAE metrics but our power to productize. We will engineer the power of e-markets to productize. A company that can mesh easily will (someday) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We will widen our capacity to deploy without lessening our capability to brand. The content factor is viral. Think real-world. Think viral. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not robust. Think C2B2B. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SMIL. At On Target Pro, we understand how to integrate virally. Without preplanned 60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable user interfaces, action-items are forced to become leading-edge. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "plug-and-play" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Apache. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that if you e-enable holistically then you may also engineer mega-holistically. Think B2C. Think real-time. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "front-end" really mean? Without micro-global ubiquitous B2B2C user-centric bandwidth, you will lack open-source, strategic TQM. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "extensible" really mean? We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough ASP. At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to brand mega-virtually. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. What does the commonly-used term "partnerships" really mean? We will envisioneer the term "co-branded". Without obfuscation metrics, you will lack paradigms. Think turn-key, web-enabled. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to maximize. It seems amazing, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become scalable? A company that can implement elegantly will (someday) be able to engage fiercely. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the jargon-based standard industry term "robust" really mean? We will e-enable the capacity of relationships to implement.