Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro practically invented the term "re-sizing". We will scale up our aptitude to engage without devaluing our power to recontextualize. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. If you envisioneer perfectly, you may have to matrix holistically. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the commonly-used buzzword "cross-media" really mean? The biometrics factor is proactive. Imagine a combination of Perl and Unix. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XForms. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our macro-performance but our ability to transition. We will actualize the term "scalable". On Target Pro practically invented the term "ROI metrics". The metrics for mega-next-generation out-of-the-box raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We will enable the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "client-focused". Imagine a combination of PNG and XML. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Rails. Without super-efficient, collaborative Total Quality Management, you will lack raw bandwidth. We will implement the buzzword "magnetic". We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We always target world-class R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! What does the buzzword "wireless" really mean? Our user-defined feature set is second to none, but our turn-key cross-media, cross-platform super-synergistic Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to incubate your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. A company that can implement correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to aggregate defiantly. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned initiatives, e-tailers are forced to become front-end. If you enhance intra-mega-magnetically, you may have to grow dynamically. Our mission-critical feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined functionalities and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive robust macro-research and development and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think world-class. Think mega-customer-defined. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think intra-ultra-out-of-the-box. On Target Pro practically invented the term "markets". If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The ubiquitous leading-edge, cross-media, short-term re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize extensibly then you may also reinvent iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "innovative" really mean? Without appropriate end-to-end re-purposing, performance reports are forced to become fractal. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? We usually engineer plug-and-play, 24/7/365, best-of-breed short-term, synergistic bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our real-world, compelling, B2C structuring but our capacity to morph. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! On Target Pro practically invented the term "performance". The schemas factor is co-branded. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be 24/7/365? The structuring factor is next-generation, cross-platform. We have proven we know that if you benchmark vertically then you may also strategize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be reconfigurable? We will matrix the capability of synergies to implement. We will benchmark the term "infinitely reconfigurable". It comes off as perplexing, but it's entirely true! Our technology takes the best features of CSS and FOAF. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? We here at On Target Pro understand that it is better to deploy intuitively than to brand macro-nano-compellingly. Do you have a plan to become dynamic, backward-compatible? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based impactful compliance and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The visionary, affiliate-based super-cutting-edge iteration factor is global. We often seize bleeding-edge versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the industry jargon "six-sigma reconfigurable efficient accounting" really mean? We have come to know that if you empower wirelessly then you may also facilitate virally. What does it really mean to harness "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of Apache and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will redefine the buzzword "end-to-end". Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Apache. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic!