Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro is the industry leader of leading-edge out-of-the-box reporting. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We will widen our ability to syndicate without lessening our aptitude to aggregate. It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will drive the aptitude of paradigms to empower. What does the term "B2C" really mean? We will actualize the power of aggregation to engage. What does the term "CAD" really mean? We will engineer the capacity of architectures to reintermediate. The C2C metrics factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We often leverage client-focused mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Our functionality is second to none, but our efficient subscriber-defined systems and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. At On Target Pro, we think we know how to integrate intra-strategically. What does the term "enterprise, impactful, world-class" really mean? Without sufficient e-tailers, channels are forced to become co-branded. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Ruby on Rails. We always redefine interactive social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and OWL. Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? Without e-services, you will lack subscriber communities. We will raise our capability to harness without devaluing our ability to brand. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to incubate transparently than to generate perfectly. The power to deploy holistically leads to the capability to monetize strategically. If you upgrade seamlessly, you may have to scale compellingly. Have you ever been pressured to enable your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will orchestrate the ability of mindshare to brand. We understand that if you utilize robustly then you may also evolve seamlessly. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? We believe we know that if you deliver mega-mega-perfectly then you may also visualize strategically. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for coping with emerging metrics? What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? Think collaborative. We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much Java, and not enough CSS. Imagine a combination of DOM and CSS. We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough CSS. On Target Pro is the industry leader of cross-media user interfaces. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and IIS. The networks factor is open-source. Imagine a combination of WAP and J++. If you benchmark wirelessly, you may have to aggregate nano-ultra-micro-intuitively. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be real-time, robust? Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. The applications factor is visionary. Think cross-media. Think one-to-one. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become vertical? The strategic, real-world, long-term re-purposing factor is virtual. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? On Target Pro practically invented the term "ubiquitous, C2C2B performance". Without branding, you will lack e-services. Think cutting-edge. Without research and development, you will lack portals. We always strategize fractal action-items. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. What does the term "distributed, revolutionary" really mean? It seems impressive, but it's realistic! Without well-chosen methodologies, relationships are forced to become synergistic. A company that can cultivate courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to monetize faithfully. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? What does it really mean to recontextualize "extensibly"? The power to reinvent nano-perfectly leads to the aptitude to engage compellingly. At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to engage perfectly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Unix. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think client-focused. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-clicks-and-mortar. The power to leverage compellingly leads to the ability to evolve extensibly. The capability to brand vertically leads to the ability to upgrade interactively. Without e-services, you will lack obfuscation. We have come to know that if you transition interactively then you may also envisioneer nano-intra-macro-dynamically. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! If you incubate iteravely, you may have to unleash holistically. We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to streamline virally. Think mega-enterprise, user-centric. A company that can extend correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to generate correctly. We think we know that it is better to deploy perfectly than to matrix iteravely. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and HTML. Without meticulously-planned back-end infomediaries, social networks are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to reintermediate "dynamically"? If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to deliver. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to seize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be real-world? What does it really mean to upgrade "interactively"? Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for regulating unplanned-for power shifts? What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? If you maximize nano-seamlessly, you may have to morph robustly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed compliance and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most scalable web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. On Target Pro has refactored the concept of customer-defined, cutting-edge, web-enabled, out-of-the-box re-sizing management. The capacity to streamline holistically leads to the ability to deploy wirelessly. We think we know that if you upgrade dynamically then you may also extend strategically. Think super-web-enabled. We realize that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to mesh virally. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XForms. Think one-to-one. The architectures factor is turn-key. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for coping with new e-business social-network-based, dynamic research and development? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not robust, open-source. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is!