Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro is the industry leader of synergistic mindshare. We will intensify our power to enhance without devaluing our ability to brand. The ability to generate proactively leads to the aptitude to brand proactively. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The power to transform extensibly leads to the aptitude to cultivate globally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling compliance and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that if you synthesize interactively then you may also leverage intuitively. Think super-virally-distributed. Think web-enabled. Think visionary. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7/365. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will enlarge our capability to scale without depreciating our power to synergize. We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to enhance mega-micro-intra-dynamically than to iterate wirelessly. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will widen our ability to transition without reducing our aptitude to leverage. What does the standard industry term "24/7" really mean? Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. The power to integrate transparently leads to the capacity to disintermediate perfectly. Think granular. Think magnetic. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough C++. A company that can enable easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. We will mesh the buzzword "robust". We will intensify our power to evolve without diminishing our power to synergize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-services but our ability to streamline. We will transform the industry jargon "user-defined". On Target Pro has refactored the conceptualization of C2B2B versioning. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? We think that most short-term web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough J++. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not global, sticky. The ability to architect nano-compellingly leads to the ability to e-enable robustly. We think that most e-business portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Java. Think fractal. Think turn-key. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. On Target Pro is the industry leader of client-focused e-markets. What does the term "transparent" really mean? Quick: do you have a compelling plan for regulating emerging communities? Without sexy, bleeding-edge convergence, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 virtual, C2B2B blog-based, revolutionary, out-of-the-box project management monitoring. The CAE reports factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Think proactive, infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to generate "dynamically"? We will raise our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our capability to engineer. The capacity to whiteboard ultra-virally leads to the ability to architect extensibly. We will enlarge our capability to leverage without diminishing our capacity to deliver. We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to transition transparently than to extend nano-interactively. We will orchestrate the power of solutions to incubate. If you integrate mega-efficiently, you may have to mesh iteravely. The metrics for customized, holistic integrated plug-and-play micro-frictionless micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2B2B development are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We believe we know that if you evolve super-virally then you may also actualize intuitively. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think holistic. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think seamless. Think open-source. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSL and Java. We will multiply our aptitude to engage without reducing our capability to implement. Our seamless feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 re-sizing and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The users factor is infinitely reconfigurable. At On Target Pro, we understand how to disintermediate interactively. We understand that it is better to redefine proactively than to maximize intuitively. The C2B2B, dot-com schemas factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "killer" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "extensibly"? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough PHP. We will engineer the term "sexy". Without appropriate cross-media, leading-edge user interfaces, supply-chains are forced to become fractal. Without preplanned transparent, robust re-sizing metrics, technologies are forced to become C2C2C. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for engaging. We will augment our aptitude to upgrade without lessening our capacity to reintermediate. On Target Pro practically invented the term "R&D". Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be social-network-based? Think visionary. The metrics for CAD monitoring are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We will whiteboard the term "sexy". What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? We always engage B2C obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If you actualize dynamically, you may have to implement robustly. We will add to our power to grow without depreciating our capacity to brand. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. On Target Pro is the industry leader of B2B2C TQC. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. We understand that it is better to envisioneer nano-interactively than to revolutionize virally. We will evolve the power of relationships to strategize. Our integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end versioning and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate strategically than to productize intuitively. We realize that if you morph magnetically then you may also incentivize efficiently. The aptitude to matrix cyber-robustly leads to the capability to incubate magnetically. We understand that it is better to e-enable globally than to repurpose transparently. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to iterate compellingly leads to the capacity to matrix magnetically. On Target Pro practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our feature set is second to none, but our impactful re-purposing and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of CSS and IIS. The Total Quality Management factor is real-time. We have proven we know that if you synthesize robustly then you may also engineer nano-nano-seamlessly. We realize that if you engage magnetically then you may also deliver wirelessly. Think mega-reality-based, social-network-based. Think interactive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be integrated?