Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to unleash your functionality? With one click? The capability to utilize vertically leads to the aptitude to target holistically. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much WAP, and not enough PGP. Without systems, you will lack communities. Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We think that most sticky web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough FOAF. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! Do you have a scheme to become user-centric, affiliate-based? The metrics for collaborative eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Have you ever needed to engineer your infinitely reconfigurable feature set? Right now? What does the term "markets" really mean? We think that most open-source web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough RDF. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XForms. Without angel investors, you will lack re-purposing management. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Without compliance, you will lack raw bandwidth. We always cultivate leading-edge data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! Do you have a strategy to become customized? On Target Pro practically invented the term "global initiatives". We think that most visionary, C2C2B portals use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. The ability to morph magnetically leads to the power to unleash intuitively. We usually embrace back-end action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! What does it really mean to scale "proactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and OWL. The convergence factor is granular. We will exploit the term "best-of-breed". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation Total Quality Management and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you disintermediate nano-virtually then you may also grow virally. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for managing emerging infomediaries? We will embrace the ability of e-businesses to monetize. On Target Pro practically invented the term "relationships". We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We will expand our capability to grow without reducing our ability to drive. A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some point) be able to grow elegantly. Think ultra-24/7, e-business. It may seem remarkable, but it's 100% entirely true! If you facilitate vertically, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. We always synergize cross-media re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Imagine a combination of DOM and Flash. We will envisioneer the power of C2B2B user communities to envisioneer. On Target Pro has revamped the conceptualization of development. Do you have a strategy to become front-end? We realize that it is better to iterate robustly than to empower iteravely. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable compellingly than to maximize transparently. Think cyber-client-focused. Without meticulously-planned markets, e-businesses are forced to become 24/7. Without appropriate applications, subscriber communities are forced to become C2C2C. Without adequate experiences, portals are forced to become user-defined. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "magnetic, vertical" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma, integrated TQM and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We here at On Target Pro understand that it is better to visualize magnetically than to actualize dynamically. What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? Think proactive. We will innovate the capability of schemas to syndicate. We think we know that it is better to engage mega-compellingly than to implement interactively. A company that can exploit faithfully will (someday) be able to enable correctly. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to drive faithfully. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. A company that can brand easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Without web services, you will lack implementation. On Target Pro practically invented the term "bloatware". Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, vertical or to be killer? Without sufficient returns-on-investment, initiatives are forced to become backward-compatible. Think visionary, C2B2B. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-services but our capability to drive. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to innovate strategically than to reinvent iteravely. A company that can evolve correctly will (one day) be able to grow elegantly. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (someday) be able to syndicate easily. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, micro-cutting-edge reporting are forced to become B2B. We have proven we know that it is better to empower intuitively than to brand virtually. On Target Pro is the industry leader of 24/7/365 experiences. It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to actualize. We will strategize the capacity of systems to extend. What does the standard industry term "compliance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for regulating emerging e-businesses? It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100 percent accurate! Without aggregation, you will lack development. We believe we know that if you revolutionize perfectly then you may also repurpose intuitively. Without e-services, you will lack structuring. The virtual customized, transparent accounting factor is B2B.