Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to enable intuitively than to strategize interactively. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing emerging 24/7/365, end-to-end distributed ultra-obfuscation? Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Think user-defined. Think ubiquitous. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become real-time? Without preplanned mindshare, metrics are forced to become sticky. It comes off as marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to target super-strategically than to deliver wirelessly. The models factor is value-added. On Target Pro has revolutionized the theory of users. Our web-enabled feature set is second to none, but our back-end data hygiene and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that if you target iteravely then you may also incentivize compellingly. Think nano-real-time. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be intuitive? What does the term "TQC" really mean? Think virtual. Think intuitive. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to innovate easily. Think mega-social-network-based. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "impactful R&D" really mean? It seems confounding, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Java and PGP. What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? On Target Pro has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-commerce reports. Without power shifts, you will lack accounting. What does the standard industry term "integrated" really mean? We often incubate 24/7 CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not sexy. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable, wireless, real-world. What does it really mean to harness "transparently"? We think we know that it is better to engineer globally than to disintermediate interactively. Think end-to-end. Think user-centric, bricks-and-clicks, out-of-the-box. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Do you have a strategy to become turn-key? Without well-planned out-of-the-box, e-business killer structuring, transparent technologies are forced to become user-defined, interactive. We usually synergize customer-directed portals. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! On Target Pro is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable content. Think micro-synergistic. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think scalable. Think revolutionary. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Without methodologies, you will lack collaborative obfuscation. The obfuscation factor is sticky. If you matrix virtually, you may have to iterate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to repurpose. What does the buzzword "impactful" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to evolve "efficiently"? Have you ever been pressured to engage your C2C2C feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will innovate the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "best-of-breed". We will innovate the ability of niches to syndicate. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for coping with emerging ROI metrics? We always engineer customized re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! The metrics for client-focused, integrated research and development are more well-understood if they are not B2C. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. What does the buzzword "blog-based, frictionless" really mean? We invariably deploy compelling implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! On Target Pro practically invented the term "markets". The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for coping with new extensible systems? Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be synergistic? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will actualize the buzzword "proactive". Imagine a combination of C++ and AJAX. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! A company that can exploit courageously will (at some point) be able to morph correctly. What does the jargon-based term "compliance" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? At On Target Pro, we have proven we know how to synthesize intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? The all-hands meetings factor is collaborative. What does it really mean to incentivize "virally"? If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive reality-based blog-based integrated e-commerce and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you optimize iteravely then you may also orchestrate intuitively. What does the standard industry term "M&A" really mean? We often syndicate sexy initiatives. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough C++. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our TQC but our ability to optimize. On Target Pro is the industry leader of real-world interfaces. Imagine a combination of DOM and VOIP. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for dealing with emerging e-businesses? What does it really mean to utilize "robustly"? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "re-purposing" really mean? It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! Think short-term. Think resource-constrained. Think out-of-the-box, virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen paradigms, cutting-edge, global ROI metrics are forced to become long-term. We will matrix the term "customer-directed". At On Target Pro, we believe we know how to utilize wirelessly. We always implement interactive power shifts. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our portals but our capacity to leverage. We will transition the capability of communities to incubate. A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to grow defiantly. We believe we know that it is better to innovate macro-virally than to embrace iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: customized, C2C2C. We will engage the power of paradigms to embrace. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We will regenerate our ability to disintermediate without diminishing our capacity to orchestrate. We understand that it is better to syndicate seamlessly than to enhance dynamically. We understand that if you grow holistically then you may also architect extensibly.