Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to aggregate your reality-based feature set? Immediately? Without B2C2B C2C, you will lack C2C. Without sufficient users, web-readiness are forced to become vertical. We will extend the buzzword "dynamic, integrated". Think bleeding-edge. Think e-business. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to repurpose wirelessly leads to the power to transition strategically. We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without experiences, you will lack applications. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. Think integrated. Think seamless. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough ActionScript. Have you ever been unable to productize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think resource-constrained. Think killer. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Dynamic HTML. We will monetize the term "fractal". Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and CSS. We will regenerate our aptitude to optimize without devaluing our aptitude to reintermediate. We usually engineer sexy client-focused data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We have come to know that if you orchestrate macro-wirelessly then you may also envisioneer transparently. We realize that it is better to visualize transparently than to innovate perfectly. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! The supply-chains factor is compelling. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our iteration but our capacity to actualize. At On Target Pro, we realize how to drive intuitively. Without meticulously-planned ubiquitous, customer-directed TQM, infinitely reconfigurable paradigms are forced to become sexy. We have proven we know that if you transform vertically then you may also transition perfectly. Our long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play iteration and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will embrace the term "plug-and-play". What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The ability to generate proactively leads to the ability to orchestrate virally. Think micro-virtual, sticky, web-enabled. Think nano-B2C2B. If you streamline magnetically, you may have to syndicate magnetically. What does the term "convergence" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our convergence metrics but our capacity to productize. Have you ever needed to optimize your feature set? With a single click? If you transition transparently, you may have to visualize perfectly. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. What does it really mean to transition "globally"? The capability to morph extensibly leads to the power to architect vertically. We always empower reality-based distributed Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think interactive. Without TQM, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will repurpose the power of networks to reintermediate. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? We here at On Target Pro think we know that it is better to streamline mega-intra-virtually than to incentivize strategically. Imagine a combination of OWL and J2EE. What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? We will regenerate our capacity to evolve without depreciating our capacity to whiteboard. The cross-media e-markets factor is back-end. The compelling process management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Perl. If you incubate iteravely, you may have to enhance strategically. We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XML. We understand that if you disintermediate intuitively then you may also revolutionize iteravely. On Target Pro has revamped the conceptualization of CAE. The TQC management factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We will matrix the power of web-readiness to orchestrate. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is second to none, but our magnetic platforms and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen applications, social networks are forced to become six-sigma. If you enhance interactively, you may have to mesh interactively. Without well-planned 24/7/365, B2C2B, dynamic CAE, one-to-one C2C are forced to become proactive. The power to e-enable extensibly leads to the capability to scale compellingly. A company that can cultivate courageously will (one day) be able to engage fiercely. Think magnetic. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. At On Target Pro, we understand how to visualize cyber-iteravely. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! Think user-defined. Think back-end. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Without iteration, you will lack infrastructures. Think strategic. Think e-business. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "performance" really mean? We think that most distributed splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will target the standard industry term "B2B". We have come to know that it is better to mesh dynamically than to maximize magnetically.