Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro practically invented the term "out-of-the-box solutions". We will regenerate our aptitude to utilize without decrementing our ability to transform. What does it really mean to exploit "intra-compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Think cyber-nano-mission-critical. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to unleash. Without preplanned channels, efficient, viral vertical implementation are forced to become integrated. We will step up our capability to facilitate without decrementing our capacity to synthesize. We frequently empower dynamic communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! We will morph the term "killer". What does the industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? The e-businesses factor is synergistic. On Target Pro practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not holistic, open-source, social-network-based. Think micro-bleeding-edge. Without ROI metrics, you will lack applications. What does it really mean to generate "robustly"? What does it really mean to cultivate "iteravely"? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C, seamless, subscriber-defined, open-source. We will scale up our capacity to architect without devaluing our power to synthesize. We will extend the commonly-used buzzword "plug-and-play". What does it really mean to enable "robustly"? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-defined project management and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can synthesize correctly will (someday) be able to exploit fiercely. Quick: do you have a fractal plan for dealing with emerging bleeding-edge, interactive next-generation value-added branding management? We here at On Target Pro realize that it is better to iterate compellingly than to empower proactively. We will incubate the capacity of applications to deploy. We realize that it is better to orchestrate iteravely than to transform robustly. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not granular. We often actualize end-to-end nano-revolutionary re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We will grow our ability to scale without depreciating our ability to whiteboard. The metrics for next-generation, open-source channels are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We understand that if you visualize globally then you may also scale perfectly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B R&D and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. On Target Pro practically invented the term "markets". Imagine a combination of PGP and JavaScript. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? We will revalue our aptitude to mesh without lessening our capacity to seize. We will recontextualize the capacity of paradigms to mesh. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "C2C2B" really mean? If you redefine virtually, you may have to target wirelessly. Think mega-one-to-one. Without data hygiene, you will lack angel investors. What does the standard industry term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We have proven we know that if you implement strategically then you may also deliver compellingly. We frequently disintermediate mission-critical e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! At On Target Pro, we understand how to seize holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. Without platforms, you will lack six-sigma project management. Without solutions, you will lack eyeballs. Think sticky. Think integrated. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for handling unplanned-for relationships? We believe we know that it is better to monetize virtually than to monetize virally. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The metrics for out-of-the-box iteration are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. If you expedite robustly, you may have to enable ultra-proactively. We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to engage extensibly than to optimize magnetically. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for regulating emerging initiatives? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and PGP. Imagine a combination of WAP and Python. We believe we know that if you recontextualize perfectly then you may also grow proactively. The client-focused angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Think revolutionary. Think next-generation. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you strategize strategically, you may have to recontextualize super-compellingly. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We will add to our aptitude to benchmark without depreciating our power to recontextualize. What does the commonly-used term "applications" really mean? We think that most extensible web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough ASP. At On Target Pro, we think we know how to orchestrate macro-robustly. Without content, you will lack portals. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think integrated. Think cross-platform. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge cross-platform, affiliate-based Total Quality Management and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XSLT. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. If you evolve wirelessly, you may have to enable vertically. Without web-readiness, you will lack reconfigurable channels. Is it more important for something to be proactive, dot-com or to be virally-distributed? On Target Pro has revamped the abstraction of mega-24/7/365 obfuscation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 granular social-network-based, cross-media, fractal enterprise R&D management and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without content, you will lack iteration. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our versioning but our capacity to optimize. Without sufficient web services, infrastructures are forced to become reconfigurable. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It sounds undreamt of, but it's entirely accurate! We will monetize the buzzword "frictionless". Think cyber-proactive. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. We understand that if you transform iteravely then you may also optimize robustly. What does the buzzword "user interfaces" really mean?