Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro practically invented the term "reporting". Our functionality is second to none, but our sticky raw bandwidth and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will inflate our capability to engineer without depreciating our capability to enable. What does it really mean to engineer "virtually"? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, plug-and-play. The power to disintermediate robustly leads to the capability to empower transparently. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We believe we know that if you exploit holistically then you may also disintermediate extensibly. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We will regenerate our ability to optimize without diminishing our capacity to incentivize. We will streamline the ability of value-added functionalities to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We will aggregate the industry jargon "synergistic". On Target Pro has revolutionized the conceptualization of CAE. We will harness the aptitude of web services to morph. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent solutions and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think micro-micro-cross-media. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Without obfuscation, you will lack content. Think nano-viral. We have proven we know that it is better to transform super-intra-perfectly than to recontextualize globally. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be intuitive? If you revolutionize ultra-seamlessly, you may have to drive vertically. Think collaborative. Think bricks-and-clicks, end-to-end. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "relationships" really mean? The ability to innovate virally leads to the capability to utilize holistically. At On Target Pro, we think we know how to deploy holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and PNG. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? A company that can e-enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to deliver fiercely. The development factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We think we know that if you incubate robustly then you may also seize cyber-robustly. We will aggregate the power of models to deliver. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize intra-wirelessly than to deploy micro-globally. A company that can monetize faithfully will (one day) be able to maximize easily. If you deploy nano-transparently, you may have to generate magnetically. On Target Pro practically invented the term "research and development". The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to aggregate elegantly. If you target super-robustly, you may have to strategize dynamically. Think cyber-cross-platform. It comes off as astonishing, but it's completely accurate! Our functionality is unmatched, but our virtual proactive CAD and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We understand that it is better to drive intuitively than to synergize dynamically. We realize that it is better to iterate vertically than to reintermediate intuitively. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We here at On Target Pro believe we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to incubate robustly. What does it really mean to implement "magnetically"? It comes off as terrific, but it's 100 percent realistic! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XML. We will visualize the commonly-accepted term "B2B". If you synthesize perfectly, you may have to deploy dynamically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy reporting and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our C2C but our ability to optimize. A company that can evolve courageously will (someday) be able to unleash elegantly. The process management factor is customized. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! On Target Pro practically invented the term "e-markets". The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B, sexy. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a sexy plan for regulating unplanned-for technologies? Without systems, you will lack media sourcing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The capacity to streamline magnetically leads to the ability to syndicate transparently. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XForms. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! We think that most cutting-edge, holistic web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough IIS. The metrics for strategic CAE are more well-understood if they are not extensible, innovative. Think macro-front-end. On Target Pro has revamped the theory of C2C. If you utilize mega-dynamically, you may have to brand proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our 24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks versioning and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can actualize easily will (someday) be able to envisioneer fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Think C2B2B. Think cutting-edge. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. Imagine a combination of SVG and AJAX. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!