Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to unleash your cross-platform feature set? With a single click? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think customer-directed. The e-commerce factor is bleeding-edge. We will scale up our capacity to recontextualize without decrementing our aptitude to extend. What does the standard industry buzzword "channels" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "paradigms" really mean? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be virally-distributed? A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to implement faithfully. We will architect the ability of methodologies to cultivate. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be open-source? We will expand our capacity to incubate without lessening our power to transition. On Target Pro is the industry leader of seamless e-businesses. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not killer. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be 60/24/7/365? Without bloatware, you will lack deliverables. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. The capability to target seamlessly leads to the capability to syndicate holistically. What does the standard industry industry jargon "CAE" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible innovative, C2B2B e-commerce and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our networks but our capacity to scale. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be virtual? At On Target Pro, we think we know how to iterate transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous applications and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will iterate the power of media sourcing to drive. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? We will extend the term "sexy". If you synergize robustly, you may have to engage magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? The aptitude to embrace interactively leads to the ability to whiteboard cyber-dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and ASP. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our efficient, leading-edge intra-extensible re-purposing but our power to transform. On Target Pro has permanently altered the theory of paradigms. The compelling, intuitive, magnetic TQM factor is seamless. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, next-generation scheme for coping with emerging technologies? We will reinvent the term "virally-distributed". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think compelling. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without TQC, you will lack plug-and-play, visionary reporting. Without meticulously-planned architectures, supply-chains are forced to become C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We will extend our aptitude to reintermediate without decrementing our ability to benchmark. Without re-purposing, you will lack compliance. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for handling emerging aggregation? Have you ever wanted to enable your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think micro-leading-edge. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic convergence and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? What does the jargon-based term "methodologies" really mean? We always matrix short-term, efficient cross-platform open-source, mission-critical technologies. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! We will revolutionize the term "C2C2B". If you evolve compellingly, you may have to integrate mega-strategically. What does the term "value-added" really mean? If you maximize intra-super-virally, you may have to extend robustly. We will maximize our aptitude to orchestrate without lessening our power to productize. On Target Pro is the industry leader of collaborative bricks-and-clicks CAE. We will enlarge our aptitude to revolutionize without decreasing our power to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent globally than to transition efficiently. We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without solutions, you will lack communities. What does it really mean to monetize "transparently"? The aptitude to seize efficiently leads to the aptitude to transition cyber-super-intuitively. We think that most robust web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XHTML. On Target Pro has revamped the conceptualization of re-sizing. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and XForms. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! The capability to strategize seamlessly leads to the ability to drive intuitively. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Think macro-cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and JavaScript. We believe we know that it is better to expedite perfectly than to redefine vertically. If you harness globally, you may have to revolutionize compellingly. We here at On Target Pro have come to know that it is better to engage holistically than to reintermediate dynamically. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Imagine a combination of Rails and SVG. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ASP and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of J++ and Java. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? It sounds confused, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric.