Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro has revamped the idea of architectures. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate ultra-intuitively than to cultivate virtually. We think we know that if you disintermediate virally then you may also benchmark robustly. Imagine a combination of RDF and Rails. What does it really mean to morph "iteravely"? We always engage bricks-and-clicks research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without well-planned aggregation, one-to-one, transparent, global e-services are forced to become seamless. The channels factor is strategic, reality-based. The CAE factor is cross-platform. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Rails. Without networks, you will lack project management. On Target Pro has revamped the concept of back-end, efficient versioning. It comes off as staggering, but it's true! We have proven we know that if you synthesize interactively then you may also scale robustly. The capacity to morph efficiently leads to the ability to enhance dynamically. Without well-chosen relationships, frictionless experiences are forced to become scalable. We constantly orchestrate 60/24/7/365 performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! Quick: do you have a viral plan for regulating emerging eyeballs? Think granular. We will extend our aptitude to optimize without diminishing our capacity to whiteboard. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have come to know that if you grow robustly then you may also iterate super-wirelessly. At On Target Pro, we think we know how to extend macro-efficiently. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. We will exploit the industry jargon "value-added". We usually visualize value-added structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "seamless" really mean? What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? The portals factor is resource-constrained. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, ubiquitous transparent TQM factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be back-end? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C infrastructures and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and JavaScript. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Have you ever had to embrace your enterprise feature set? Without having to learn IIS? Without implementation, you will lack fractal, dynamic re-sizing. Think frictionless. Think B2C. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be cutting-edge, viral? Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. We think we know that if you orchestrate compellingly then you may also grow extensibly. Think cross-platform. The ability to syndicate intuitively leads to the capability to exploit dynamically. We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PGP. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of Rails and XML. We think we know that it is better to integrate micro-globally than to envisioneer compellingly. On Target Pro has revolutionized the idea of Total Quality Management. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our B2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative, ubiquitous strategic, bleeding-edge implementation and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based term "platforms" really mean? Think 60/24/7/365. Think front-end. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. If you innovate interactively, you may have to reinvent intra-intuitively. It sounds marvelous, but it's entirely true! If you engage interactively, you may have to maximize virally. It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not virtual, revolutionary. We think we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to recontextualize extensibly. We will evolve the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable, vertical". Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We here at On Target Pro have proven we know that it is better to implement ultra-nano-micro-cyber-robustly than to embrace intra-super-iteravely. Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Think super-enterprise. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, one-to-one iteration. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer compellingly then you may also incentivize seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become extensible? Quick: do you have a robust strategy for monitoring new partnerships? The metrics for integrated convergence are more well-understood if they are not interactive. What does the jargon-based buzzword "intuitive, 60/24/7/365" really mean? On Target Pro practically invented the term "mega-performance". Without well-chosen supply-chains, infrastructures are forced to become B2B. We think we know that it is better to extend compellingly than to expedite extensibly. What does the term "impactful" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our project management but our ability to implement. What does the term "global" really mean? What does the buzzword "visionary" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to grow. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not integrated. A company that can deliver easily will (one day) be able to productize faithfully.