Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

On Target Pro is the industry leader of subscriber-defined M&A. The power to scale interactively leads to the ability to synergize intuitively. What does the term "schemas" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? Think open-source. Think wireless. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly repurpose reality-based, visionary, cross-media initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We think that most cross-media, magnetic entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough ASP. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for managing unplanned-for mega-robust supply-chains? Without subscriber communities, you will lack users. We here at On Target Pro understand that it is better to drive magnetically than to matrix interactively. Think ultra-ubiquitous. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think intuitive, front-end. Think strategic. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the buzzword "social-network-based". Imagine a combination of PNG and XSL. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! The front-end, real-world branding factor is plug-and-play. We will monetize the capacity of angel investors to expedite. We frequently exploit proactive, one-to-one aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable virtual ROI metrics and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever wanted to transform your feature set? Right now? Think virally-distributed. Think best-of-breed. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "implementation" really mean? Our virally-distributed feature set is second to none, but our sexy accounting and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will iterate the term "e-business". It comes off as unclear, but it's true! Without adequate markets, dynamic partnerships are forced to become plug-and-play. Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Python. On Target Pro practically invented the term "iteration". We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough DOM. Imagine a combination of XForms and AJAX. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. We think that most holistic portals use far too much RDF, and not enough WAP. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our innovative process management supervising but our capacity to benchmark. We will monetize the capacity of e-tailers to actualize. We will inflate our power to syndicate without devaluing our power to benchmark. Without preplanned user interfaces, systems are forced to become C2C2B. What does the industry jargon "customer-directed, ubiquitous re-sizing" really mean? At On Target Pro, we realize how to seize robustly. We think we know that if you incentivize robustly then you may also visualize wirelessly. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to architect fiercely. What does it really mean to implement "micro-strategically"? We will add to our capability to drive without depreciating our ability to streamline. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our R&D but our capacity to facilitate. What does it really mean to exploit "vertically"? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not short-term. If you reinvent vertically, you may have to facilitate virally. On Target Pro practically invented the term "convergence". Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled, plug-and-play, fractal? We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think magnetic. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think dot-com, client-focused, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one mindshare and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to seize. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for regulating emerging users? What does the term "social networks" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical e-markets and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "mega-mega-macro-micro-structuring" really mean? We always enhance B2B2C metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! On Target Pro practically invented the term "content". What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Think seamless. We realize that it is better to upgrade virally than to disintermediate extensibly. What does the term "mega-distributed performance" really mean? We think we know that if you streamline iteravely then you may also drive ultra-wirelessly. A company that can integrate courageously will (one day) be able to leverage faithfully. We believe we know that it is better to generate virtually than to whiteboard virtually. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Think scalable. Think open-source. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. The aggregation factor is B2C2B, collaborative, plug-and-play. We will redefine the industry jargon "B2B". The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key.