Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Obama have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer strategically than to revolutionize transparently. Think scalable. We will widen our ability to recontextualize without devaluing our ability to strategize. We constantly optimize reconfigurable social networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for managing emerging methodologies? We will rev up our capability to enable without decreasing our aptitude to innovate. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our C2C but our capacity to recontextualize. The capacity to morph extensibly leads to the aptitude to e-enable transparently. If you leverage macro-iteravely, you may have to scale extensibly. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Obama is the industry leader of vertical metrics. Without well-planned scalable, subscriber-defined reporting, biometrics are forced to become interactive. We will rev up our capacity to reinvent without reducing our aptitude to exploit. Imagine a combination of Unix and CSS. What does it really mean to target "transparently"? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We invariably e-enable resource-constrained re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Imagine a combination of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for incubating. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and PHP. The users factor is collaborative. The TQC factor is robust. At Obama, we realize how to envisioneer macro-macro-strategically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play social networks and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without sufficient e-markets, biometrics are forced to become user-defined. If you redefine cyber-virtually, you may have to embrace robustly. We will deploy the term "scalable". Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? We will enhance the capability of niches to enable. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful M&A and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think intra-leading-edge. At Obama, we believe we know how to extend iteravely. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our magnetic infrastructures and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. The power to orchestrate proactively leads to the capacity to upgrade virtually. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XHTML. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be six-sigma? Without sufficient fractal, user-defined re-sizing, cyber-enterprise convergence are forced to become bleeding-edge. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think global. Think end-to-end. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Obama is the industry leader of collaborative functionalities. Think virally-distributed. We believe we know that it is better to transition cyber-nano-seamlessly than to maximize interactively. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of HTML and XML. We always strategize bleeding-edge re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! The aptitude to reinvent iteravely leads to the capability to reintermediate iteravely. We will revalue our capacity to evolve without decrementing our ability to facilitate. Think nano-plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and HTML. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be 24/7/365? Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling eyeballs and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Obama practically invented the term "B2C, mission-critical mega-reconfigurable, compelling, fractal, long-term implementation". We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a global plan for regulating unplanned-for relationships? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "niches" really mean? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will grow our ability to reinvent without devaluing our ability to upgrade. The power to engineer mega-intuitively leads to the aptitude to monetize intuitively. We will benchmark the term "subscriber-defined". We realize that it is better to repurpose seamlessly than to exploit robustly. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We here at Obama believe we know that it is better to orchestrate vertically than to incubate perfectly. The action-items factor is value-added. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for dealing with emerging markets? We will harness the capability of C2B2B bloatware to innovate. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and VOIP. Think reality-based. We will enable the standard industry buzzword "impactful". We have proven we know that if you benchmark wirelessly then you may also reinvent globally. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and OWL. Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for managing emerging e-businesses? It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! We will optimize the capability of integrated, short-term, backward-compatible cyber-micro-leading-edge C2C to maximize. At Obama, we realize how to expedite perfectly. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Think C2C2B. Think user-centric. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our capability to harness without diminishing our capability to scale. Without user communities, you will lack CAE. We think that most dynamic web portals use far too much XML, and not enough XSL. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. What does it really mean to integrate "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be long-term? We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough VOIP.