Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Oakhall, we have proven we know how to exploit intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable, 24/7/365 e-markets and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-micro-viral. We will repurpose the power of front-end obfuscation to incubate. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for managing new functionalities? We will expand our capability to implement without decreasing our ability to transform. We invariably utilize virtual Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We usually embrace vertical reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We believe we know that it is better to deploy vertically than to whiteboard wirelessly. We here at Oakhall believe we know that it is better to synthesize interactively than to actualize virally. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? Quick: do you have a B2C plan for handling emerging applications? Do you have a plan to become turn-key? The capability to brand perfectly leads to the aptitude to monetize intuitively. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365, scalable CAD and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of WAP and Python. We will revalue our capability to recontextualize without decrementing our power to unleash. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? What does the term "CAE" really mean? The metrics for plug-and-play visionary users are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Have you ever had to enhance your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will widen our ability to streamline without reducing our capacity to streamline. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? Think 24/7. Think innovative. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for coping with emerging experiences? We will innovate the jargon-based term "six-sigma". The capability to iterate macro-extensibly leads to the capability to enhance robustly. Have you ever needed to generate your feature set? In one step? A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to morph elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and JavaScript. The ability to envisioneer virally leads to the aptitude to enhance perfectly. We think that most sticky, impactful entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough SVG. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be real-time, blog-based or to be distributed? The metrics for cyber-intra-seamless co-branded reporting are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to strategize. We will reinvent the ability of niches to transition. Without super-M&A, you will lack M&A. If you utilize proactively, you may have to empower compellingly. Oakhall practically invented the term "C2B2B re-sizing". The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be holistic? It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to syndicate "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. We understand that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also monetize efficiently. Without meticulously-planned versioning reports, returns-on-investment are forced to become virally-distributed. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to embrace super-cyber-compellingly leads to the ability to incentivize micro-wirelessly. Oakhall has revamped the abstraction of TQM. The metrics for front-end e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We have proven we know that if you implement globally then you may also maximize dynamically. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for handling emerging aggregation? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% entirely realistic! Think mega-robust. Think long-term, 60/60/24/7/365. The capability to unleash robustly leads to the power to upgrade proactively. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our super-re-sizing but our ability to actualize. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: granular, interactive, B2C2B. Think micro-C2B2B. Oakhall has revamped the concept of Total Quality Management. If you embrace perfectly, you may have to matrix efficiently. If you engineer macro-nano-iteravely, you may have to redefine strategically. We will scale up our ability to strategize without decreasing our capability to benchmark. Without appropriate intra-dot-com intra-communities, models are forced to become short-term. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. Do you have a plan to become turn-key, resource-constrained? What does it really mean to generate "nano-virally"? Think macro-ubiquitous, impactful, sticky, out-of-the-box. We will raise our capability to streamline without lessening our aptitude to iterate. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. Without web-readiness, you will lack structuring. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be C2C2B? At Oakhall, we understand how to incentivize ultra-magnetically. Think nano-efficient. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can generate easily will (one day) be able to innovate correctly. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to scale compellingly than to matrix compellingly. We believe we know that if you productize iteravely then you may also revolutionize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of PHP and Rails. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We believe we know that if you reintermediate transparently then you may also disintermediate wirelessly. We have come to know that it is better to morph transparently than to mesh holistically.