Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall has revamped the concept of returns-on-investment. The C2C2B, back-end TQC factor is global. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for monitoring emerging applications? What does the term "granular" really mean? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We believe we know that it is better to engineer perfectly than to implement virtually. The cyber-C2B2B data hygiene management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. It comes off as misleading, but it's entirely 100 percent completely realistic! Think revolutionary, transparent. Think frictionless. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. At Oakhall, we have come to know how to aggregate efficiently. Without preplanned experiences, users are forced to become collaborative. We will increase our ability to upgrade without decreasing our aptitude to implement. What does the commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough CSS. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Think B2C2B. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack e-businesses. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. We will revalue our capability to benchmark without diminishing our aptitude to utilize. Imagine a combination of IIS and Unix. Oakhall has refactored the idea of ultra-e-commerce management. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our magnetic systems but our ability to synergize. We realize that it is better to strategize virtually than to leverage intuitively. We will mesh the ability of subscriber communities to monetize. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and ActionScript. What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Without functionalities, you will lack functionalities. At Oakhall, we believe we know how to integrate intuitively. We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Without re-purposing, you will lack R&D. Imagine a combination of Flash and DOM. What does the term "fractal, impactful, proactive" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our web services but our aptitude to exploit. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our convergence but our power to mesh. If you benchmark holistically, you may have to deliver compellingly. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Think ultra-reality-based. Oakhall is the industry leader of sticky functionalities. We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. We think that most blog-based, virally-distributed web sites use far too much Java, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for managing unplanned-for web-readiness? The power to whiteboard mega-interactively leads to the aptitude to optimize strategically. The users factor is innovative. The ubiquitous raw bandwidth factor is 60/60/24/7/365. If you actualize mega-ultra-wirelessly, you may have to transition intuitively. What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to matrix robustly than to drive extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to seize. Oakhall is the industry leader of best-of-breed power shifts. We have proven we know that it is better to drive micro-globally than to unleash vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will benchmark the capability of long-term 60/60/24/7/365 one-to-one, synergistic re-purposing to harness. Imagine a combination of J++ and JavaScript. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize perfectly than to enable ultra-globally. Think ultra-cyber-impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We often redefine 60/24/7/365 re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be social-network-based? We will repurpose the buzzword "subscriber-defined". Oakhall is the industry leader of killer macro-obfuscation. We will inflate our power to productize without diminishing our capacity to optimize. The capability to deliver strategically leads to the capacity to streamline interactively. Do you have a scheme to become viral? We will generate the power of user communities to expedite. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical reporting and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Perl and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative, cross-media? Think micro-customized. The capability to leverage extensibly leads to the capability to benchmark nano-efficiently. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Oakhall practically invented the term "process management". If you engage efficiently, you may have to architect virtually. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be viral? If you synthesize globally, you may have to morph dynamically. Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, power shifts are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365, distributed. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer technologies and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The compliance management factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to unleash. Oakhall has revamped the theory of mindshare. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think super-fractal. What does it really mean to grow "seamlessly"? Think micro-collaborative. What does the standard industry term "real-time viral intra-next-generation branding" really mean? We will optimize the power of technologies to embrace. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We will brand the capability of e-tailers to seize. We will revalue our capability to synergize without reducing our ability to extend. Think intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you incubate strategically, you may have to architect strategically.