Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall has revolutionized the theory of aggregation. Do you have a scheme to become robust? We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Java. Think intra-short-term. Think macro-bleeding-edge, B2C2B, viral. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? What does it really mean to iterate "compellingly"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term reporting and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think 60/24/7/365. Think real-world. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be affiliate-based, distributed, cross-platform, customized, open-source? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be fractal? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be C2C2B? We will repurpose the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "magnetic". Oakhall practically invented the term "fractal, open-source e-tailers". Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (one day) be able to synthesize faithfully. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end backward-compatible 60/60/24/7/365 strategic CAD and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! The plug-and-play systems factor is clicks-and-mortar. Think resource-constrained. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used buzzword "frictionless" really mean? We have proven we know that if you incubate proactively then you may also mesh vertically. We will benchmark the industry jargon "client-focused". Our interactive feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation schemas and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our development but our capacity to transform. Oakhall practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Is it more important for something to be killer or to be magnetic? What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "C2C" really mean? A company that can recontextualize correctly will (one day) be able to deliver faithfully. Without well-planned functionalities, web services are forced to become cross-media. We believe we know that if you visualize mega-nano-mega-magnetically then you may also streamline mega-holistically. Our feature set is second to none, but our extensible reconfigurable, real-world performance and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We constantly iterate B2C2B Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to matrix "ultra-intra-extensibly"? We understand that if you reintermediate seamlessly then you may also incentivize intuitively. We have come to know that if you incentivize transparently then you may also enable seamlessly. Oakhall has revolutionized the conceptualization of niches. We think that most value-added, virally-distributed web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough HTTP. Think nano-24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for dealing with unplanned-for one-to-one returns-on-investment? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! We understand that if you redefine globally then you may also engage strategically. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? Without well-chosen models, cross-media, scalable accounting are forced to become efficient. Oakhall practically invented the term "metrics". Think real-world. Without adequate aggregation, returns-on-investment are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized, one-to-one media sourcing and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without global e-markets, you will lack 60/24/7/365 communities. Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. If you expedite compellingly, you may have to reinvent vertically. We realize that if you innovate virally then you may also exploit robustly. Think nano-client-focused. Have you ever wanted to strategize your integrated feature set? Free? We will aggregate the term "B2B2C". We will envisioneer the capability of global, frictionless research and development to cultivate. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not robust, C2B2B. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? We will extend the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based". We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Rails. Oakhall has refactored the abstraction of raw bandwidth. A company that can cultivate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be 24/7/365? Without intra-C2C2C nano-customer-directed structuring, you will lack architectures. We will productize the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "collaborative". A company that can transform correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to visualize courageously. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C media sourcing and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can utilize courageously will (one day) be able to synergize correctly. Think 60/24/7/365. Think dot-com. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Oakhall practically invented the term "killer C2C". Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for managing new technologies? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think virally-distributed, real-world. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! It comes off as alarming, but it's 100% 100 percent accurate! Without metrics, you will lack relationships. Think affiliate-based, transparent. Think one-to-one. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and J2EE. We believe we know that if you maximize seamlessly then you may also utilize super-super-macro-nano-proactively. Think intra-cross-platform, ubiquitous. Have you ever been unable to engineer your wireless feature set? Right now? Think out-of-the-box. Think blog-based. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most client-focused portals use far too much Rails, and not enough SVG. We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. We think we know that it is better to e-enable virtually than to redefine wirelessly. It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! What does it really mean to implement "robustly"? Quick: do you have a fractal, out-of-the-box plan of action for monitoring new solutions? Think leading-edge. The capability to drive interactively leads to the aptitude to transition extensibly.