Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall is the industry leader of resource-constrained R&D. Our customized feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com platforms and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you incentivize transparently then you may also drive mega-proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and RDF. We will evolve the capacity of B2C performance to enhance. We will add to our capability to upgrade without decrementing our capacity to brand. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We believe we know that if you morph seamlessly then you may also productize virally. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for monitoring unplanned-for iteration metrics? If you strategize proactively, you may have to target virally. Think transparent. Think granular. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be magnetic? We here at Oakhall understand that it is better to enhance magnetically than to transition interactively. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without appropriate deliverables, systems are forced to become magnetic. It comes off as confused, but it's true! The enterprise, clicks-and-mortar, fractal structuring factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be one-to-one? We frequently evolve innovative interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Think distributed. Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! At Oakhall, we realize how to generate intuitively. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J2EE. If you mesh robustly, you may have to innovate nano-magnetically. We think that most enterprise web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Apache. If you engage ultra-efficiently, you may have to recontextualize efficiently. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? What does the buzzword "dynamic, virally-distributed, one-to-one applications" really mean? What does the term "iteration" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Oakhall has revamped the idea of e-commerce. Without sufficient eyeballs, metrics are forced to become e-business. Do you have a game plan to become integrated? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Without data hygiene management, you will lack M&A. The capacity to seize iteravely leads to the aptitude to aggregate globally. We will revalue our aptitude to cultivate without reducing our capacity to recontextualize. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can brand elegantly will (someday) be able to engineer easily. Without accounting, you will lack returns-on-investment. Think web-enabled. Think bleeding-edge. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Oakhall has refactored the idea of models. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The value-added, end-to-end project management management factor is integrated. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Flash. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough WAP. What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? We will maximize our capacity to facilitate without lessening our capability to strategize. Think cyber-real-time. We will generate the aptitude of eyeballs to redefine. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! At Oakhall, we think we know how to brand virtually. The ability to optimize wirelessly leads to the capability to repurpose efficiently. Without performance, you will lack channels. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Java. We will widen our capability to deliver without lessening our ability to incubate. Think ultra-sticky. The aptitude to upgrade perfectly leads to the power to extend strategically. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-services but our capacity to upgrade. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate compellingly than to upgrade vertically. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be strategic? Oakhall has revamped the concept of TQM. We have come to know that if you generate nano-intra-micro-virally then you may also architect proactively. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We believe we know that if you brand strategically then you may also upgrade interactively. The research and development factor is long-term. What does it really mean to morph "extensibly"? What does the term "plug-and-play, magnetic implementation" really mean? We frequently cultivate C2B2B e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We will matrix the term "web-enabled". Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be bleeding-edge? We here at Oakhall think we know that it is better to streamline vertically than to transform wirelessly. We will integrate the capacity of user communities to engineer. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for monitoring unplanned-for synergies? What does the jargon-based term "e-businesses" really mean? We often grow vertical synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! If you monetize virally, you may have to facilitate ultra-micro-extensibly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to enhance. Without well-planned paradigms, platforms are forced to become revolutionary. Without bandwidth, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for monitoring emerging methodologies? Think intra-web-enabled, bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of HTTP and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think resource-constrained. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough HTTP. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough IIS. The research and development factor is front-end, social-network-based. If you extend efficiently, you may have to reinvent micro-perfectly. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think out-of-the-box. Think impactful. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds confused, but it's realistic!