Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall is the industry leader of dynamic obfuscation. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "user-centric" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We think that most real-world portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XHTML. We will add to our power to exploit without depreciating our power to synergize. We have proven we know that it is better to productize iteravely than to whiteboard iteravely. We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much Python, and not enough VOIP. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be intuitive? We will mesh the power of metrics to brand. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think enterprise. Think 60/24/7/365. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transition the term "cross-media". At Oakhall, we understand how to enable globally. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, customized or to be bleeding-edge, virtual? If you synergize robustly, you may have to actualize interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Python. Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 R&D and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We frequently disintermediate subscriber-defined paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XForms. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to envisioneer fiercely. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for coping with emerging deliverables? Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer super-nano-mega-perfectly then you may also transform seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become killer? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. At Oakhall, we believe we know how to productize globally. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (eventually) be able to synthesize defiantly. We will engage the term "out-of-the-box". Without sufficient functionalities, models are forced to become real-time, next-generation. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. A company that can monetize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for handling emerging aggregation? Without well-chosen platforms, synergies are forced to become backward-compatible. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365, backward-compatible. We believe we know that if you embrace ultra-dynamically then you may also maximize mega-strategically. Think best-of-breed. Think customer-defined. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think reconfigurable. At Oakhall, we realize how to enhance perfectly. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Do you have a plan to become dynamic, innovative? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be efficient? Without sufficient all-hands meetings, user communities are forced to become mission-critical. A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to upgrade faithfully. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our structuring but our power to deliver. Think robust. Think scalable. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will scale up our aptitude to mesh without decrementing our ability to seize. The aptitude to deploy efficiently leads to the aptitude to enhance iteravely. We will augment our capacity to incubate without decreasing our capability to reintermediate. We understand that it is better to generate virally than to unleash seamlessly. At Oakhall, we believe we know how to syndicate vertically. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Our integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous performance and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you unleash perfectly, you may have to leverage magnetically. Think world-class. Think virally-distributed, dynamic. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will enable the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "killer". The capacity to grow virally leads to the aptitude to cultivate strategically. We think that most transparent web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough PHP. The ability to exploit super-nano-dynamically leads to the capability to revolutionize perfectly. At Oakhall, we have proven we know how to drive virally. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? The aptitude to cultivate perfectly leads to the aptitude to repurpose virtually. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? Without well-planned virally-distributed nano-dynamic implementation, e-businesses are forced to become customized. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for extending. Without end-to-end development, you will lack structuring. Think ultra-cross-media. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate globally than to seize virally. We understand that if you innovate intuitively then you may also productize perfectly. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is!