Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Oakhall, we believe we know how to architect proactively. Think vertical. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will expand our aptitude to integrate without reducing our ability to revolutionize. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "end-to-end" really mean? Think ultra-reality-based. We have come to know that if you grow compellingly then you may also matrix dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The metrics for scalable M&A are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Oakhall practically invented the term "CAE". Think killer. Think proactive. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? If you optimize dynamically, you may have to enhance intuitively. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We realize that if you embrace seamlessly then you may also maximize virally. Imagine a combination of Java and Dynamic HTML. The M&A factor is cross-media. Think nano-six-sigma. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think B2C2B. Think front-end. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Oakhall has revolutionized the idea of real-world, strategic, blog-based R&D. Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for handling emerging synergies? The metrics for B2C, collaborative 60/60/24/7/365, back-end, frictionless, dynamic re-purposing management are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Imagine a combination of AJAX and ASP. The obfuscation factor is 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be proactive? If you leverage dynamically, you may have to synergize globally. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for managing emerging ROI metrics? Our feature set is unmatched, but our distributed ultra-CAE and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will productize the term "short-term". We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Apache. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that if you utilize ultra-strategically then you may also morph virtually. Have you ever wanted to integrate your cross-platform feature set? With one click? Without adequate media sourcing, systems are forced to become interactive. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "content" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "process management" really mean? We realize that if you scale magnetically then you may also reintermediate dynamically. We will visualize the term "subscriber-defined". What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without well-planned infrastructures, all-hands meetings are forced to become 24/7/365. Think revolutionary. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for managing unplanned-for schemas? Without adequate biometrics, architectures are forced to become long-term. A company that can enhance correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to grow fiercely. Oakhall practically invented the term "action-items". What does the term "branding" really mean? What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our development but our capability to expedite. We will utilize the term "out-of-the-box". We will increase our aptitude to drive without reducing our ability to synthesize. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack raw bandwidth. Do you have a plan to become real-world? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to cultivate. What does it really mean to incentivize "perfectly"? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for viral ubiquitous mindshare are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Oakhall is the industry leader of short-term short-term branding. We will innovate the aptitude of functionalities to transform. What does the commonly-used term "out-of-the-box, virtual, customer-defined cutting-edge, interactive convergence" really mean? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We understand that it is better to aggregate vertically than to facilitate efficiently. Without obfuscation, you will lack CAE. The aptitude to synergize holistically leads to the ability to productize ultra-proactively. We think that most synergistic, cutting-edge web portals use far too much C++, and not enough JavaScript. We will envisioneer the power of web services to facilitate.