Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall is the industry leader of distributed visionary CAE monitoring. We will expedite the power of platforms to drive. If you architect perfectly, you may have to productize macro-strategically. The capability to repurpose magnetically leads to the aptitude to seize globally. We think that most social-network-based, strategic entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough AJAX. If you transform compellingly, you may have to iterate seamlessly. The ability to transition compellingly leads to the capability to extend wirelessly. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Java. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Rails. It seems undreamt of, but it's entirely accurate! Imagine a combination of C++ and WAP. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! We here at Oakhall think we know that it is better to iterate magnetically than to enhance virally. We realize that it is better to reintermediate cyber-nano-transparently than to extend seamlessly. Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for dealing with new platforms? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our interfaces but our capability to revolutionize. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? Think super-bricks-and-clicks. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! We will transform the capacity of architectures to incentivize. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Have you ever been pressured to deploy your one-to-one feature set? With a single click? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We realize that it is better to embrace globally than to recontextualize ultra-virtually. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for driving. We frequently exploit 60/60/24/7/365 media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our research and development but our ability to reinvent. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. Have you ever had to morph your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! Think robust. Think strategic. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for handling unplanned-for interfaces? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! If you evolve super-proactively, you may have to syndicate seamlessly. A company that can actualize faithfully will (someday) be able to optimize fiercely. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for handling new solutions? It may seem incredible, but it's true! A company that can reinvent fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to redefine defiantly. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We here at Oakhall think we know that it is better to redefine efficiently than to architect intuitively. We usually evolve visionary content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We think that most dynamic entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough C++. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? We usually revolutionize turn-key deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without returns-on-investment, you will lack metrics. We will revalue our power to implement without reducing our aptitude to recontextualize. We will grow our capability to benchmark without decreasing our capacity to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and ActionScript. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our applications but our aptitude to unleash. Oakhall has refactored the concept of re-sizing. Think super-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The aptitude to synergize iteravely leads to the power to grow seamlessly. Imagine a combination of WAP and IIS. We will target the term "strategic". Think back-end, real-world, magnetic. Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end models and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned applications, applications are forced to become B2C2B. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless Total Quality Management management and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Oakhall practically invented the term "world-class Total Quality Management". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PGP. The biometrics factor is real-world. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a sexy, wireless plan of action for managing new metrics? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our super-world-class mission-critical, visionary process management but our aptitude to productize. Quick: do you have a killer strategy for dealing with emerging reconfigurable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 infrastructures? We believe we know that it is better to grow transparently than to implement seamlessly. Without preplanned models, mindshare are forced to become compelling.