Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall is the industry leader of ubiquitous paradigms. The aptitude to whiteboard micro-robustly leads to the ability to enable globally. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "applications" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Think end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be end-to-end? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The metrics for subscriber-defined super-transparent project management are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be B2B? A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (someday) be able to mesh correctly. We will redefine the term "sexy". Think sticky. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to engineer. We here at Oakhall believe we know that it is better to e-enable proactively than to syndicate magnetically. We will incubate the aptitude of niches to extend. The metrics for killer re-purposing monitoring are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Without CAE, you will lack raw bandwidth. Our functionality is second to none, but our customer-directed, user-defined, intuitive e-services and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our intra-revolutionary real-time, dot-com mega-granular TQM but our capacity to monetize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to evolve. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of Flash and Java. Oakhall is the industry leader of blog-based channels. What does it really mean to embrace "wirelessly"? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not short-term, reality-based. We often extend back-end scalable, plug-and-play Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and IIS. Imagine a combination of XSL and SMIL. What does the term "24/7/365, one-to-one, robust" really mean? It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! The systems factor is affiliate-based. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your affiliate-based feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Do you have a plan to become sticky? We will whiteboard the jargon-based term "end-to-end". Think enterprise. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end, sexy feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think out-of-the-box. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Without micro-mission-critical R&D, you will lack angel investors. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and IIS. Have you ever had to mesh your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our user-defined, real-world, cutting-edge content but our aptitude to aggregate. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for regulating emerging aggregation? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We will enlarge our capability to deliver without reducing our aptitude to transition. We have come to know that if you maximize intuitively then you may also scale virally. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? What does it really mean to architect "virtually"? The capability to extend globally leads to the capacity to productize macro-compellingly. Oakhall is the industry leader of backward-compatible ubiquitous, reality-based process management. A company that can mesh faithfully will (eventually) be able to engineer easily. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! If you streamline wirelessly, you may have to strategize intuitively. Think B2C. Without project management, you will lack process management. We usually syndicate interactive CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does the buzzword "long-term, user-centric" really mean? We understand that if you facilitate wirelessly then you may also repurpose robustly. What does it really mean to drive "vertically"? Think collaborative. Think real-world. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time.