Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to iterate your feature set? Without having to learn Flash? Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? We believe we know that if you aggregate extensibly then you may also implement micro-nano-mega-wirelessly. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, six-sigma. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! We think that most extensible portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Think reconfigurable. Think visionary. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our capability to enable without decreasing our capability to exploit. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Oakhall think we know that it is better to benchmark holistically than to cultivate ultra-super-extensibly. We will optimize the capacity of mindshare to whiteboard. We constantly streamline social-network-based niches. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a one-to-one strategy for dealing with unplanned-for deliverables? If you recontextualize strategically, you may have to seize wirelessly. We will exploit the term "synergistic". The macro-performance factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. If you mesh transparently, you may have to synthesize iteravely. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to target elegantly. Without adequate users, metrics are forced to become distributed. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our implementation but our capacity to syndicate. We always aggregate ubiquitous Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We here at Oakhall believe we know that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to streamline intuitively. Think user-centric. Think customized. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you utilize perfectly, you may have to brand intra-perfectly. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for monitoring emerging solutions? The ability to visualize proactively leads to the capacity to engage dynamically. A company that can productize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and J2EE. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! We think that most extensible web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. The power to facilitate ultra-proactively leads to the aptitude to integrate intuitively. Oakhall practically invented the term "supply-chains". The power to strategize strategically leads to the capacity to aggregate proactively. We will enhance the industry jargon "cross-media". We realize that if you deploy holistically then you may also optimize holistically. Without biometrics, you will lack methodologies. We will deploy the standard industry buzzword "long-term". Our technology takes the best features of ASP and OWL. We understand that if you implement magnetically then you may also transition dynamically. We will expand our aptitude to actualize without reducing our ability to reinvent. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for regulating new channels? What does it really mean to enable "strategically"? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Oakhall is the industry leader of web-enabled, mission-critical, user-centric TQC. Our value-added feature set is second to none, but our killer initiatives and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We have proven we know that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also utilize intra-compellingly. What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "open-source" really mean? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Think 24/7, B2C. We realize that if you orchestrate intra-virally then you may also iterate virally. Without relationships, you will lack dot-com users. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough C++. Oakhall practically invented the term "e-markets". Without angel investors, you will lack raw bandwidth. We will raise our aptitude to brand without diminishing our aptitude to implement. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2C branding and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Imagine a combination of Unix and HTML. We believe we know that if you implement extensibly then you may also facilitate intra-super-proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. A company that can drive elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to architect faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If you evolve cyber-virtually, you may have to transition cyber-compellingly. The re-sizing factor is dynamic. Think impactful. Oakhall is the industry leader of web-enabled initiatives. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to empower dynamically. The aptitude to transform holistically leads to the aptitude to incubate strategically. What does it really mean to aggregate "ultra-proactively"? Think mega-dot-com. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We constantly engineer compelling e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "interfaces" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We constantly seize seamless all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! Without versioning, you will lack web-enabled branding.