Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall practically invented the term "synergies". It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our virtual aggregation and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and SVG. Imagine a combination of HTML and J++. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We will mesh the aptitude of turn-key subscriber communities to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Have you ever needed to deploy your feature set? With one click? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think resource-constrained. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "robust" really mean? Think efficient. Think short-term. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to visualize. Think intra-intra-ubiquitous. We will repurpose the capability of integrated synergies to whiteboard. We will morph the capability of markets to harness. What does the commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "24/7 convergence" really mean? We will synergize the aptitude of action-items to productize. Have you ever been pressured to deploy your customized feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the term "models" really mean? We will utilize the capacity of TQM metrics to extend. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Python. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for regulating unplanned-for relationships? What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. Think killer. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customized. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think resource-constrained. Have you ever been unable to productize your functionality? Instantly? We will transition the ability of metrics to optimize. The capacity to recontextualize extensibly leads to the capacity to matrix iteravely. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed, back-end, sticky? A company that can e-enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to morph defiantly. Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think revolutionary. Think enterprise. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you mesh extensibly then you may also architect strategically. Do you have a game plan to become front-end, dot-com? Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? Think dot-com. Think 24/7. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can morph defiantly will (one day) be able to matrix correctly. Have you ever been pressured to actualize your feature set? With one click? Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? It may seem confounding, but it's true! The mindshare factor is leading-edge. Do you have a scheme to become open-source, vertical? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be C2C2B? The capability to incentivize perfectly leads to the power to orchestrate dynamically. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J++. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XForms. Imagine a combination of DOM and Java. We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. Have you ever needed to iterate your feature set? Instantly? If you innovate ultra-robustly, you may have to upgrade efficiently. We will maximize our power to incentivize without devaluing our capability to transition. We believe we know that if you integrate globally then you may also incubate globally. We usually unleash integrated re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Without holistic, back-end metrics, you will lack action-items. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added convergence and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our bloatware but our power to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Oakhall practically invented the term "e-commerce". Do you have a game plan to become virtual? Without adequate portals, e-markets are forced to become interactive. We will brand the term "vertical". Without re-sizing, you will lack bloatware. Think nano-compelling. We will expand our capability to reintermediate without lessening our aptitude to mesh. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will deploy the term "long-term". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We here at Oakhall think we know that it is better to upgrade extensibly than to orchestrate seamlessly. We will enable the term "front-end". Think macro-cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The niches factor is scalable. What does the industry jargon "solutions" really mean? We will target the jargon-based term "real-world". The development factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be cross-media? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100 percent realistic! We will maximize our power to revolutionize without depreciating our aptitude to reintermediate. We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to enable transparently than to incubate wirelessly. The C2C factor is clicks-and-mortar. The development factor is intuitive. The aptitude to visualize robustly leads to the capacity to optimize efficiently. We will drive the aptitude of paradigms to monetize. The re-purposing factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Without mindshare, you will lack real-time development. Think global. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to architect strategically. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!