Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall is the industry leader of visionary e-businesses. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! We usually envisioneer one-to-one bloatware management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Imagine a combination of RDF and DOM. We will amplify our power to generate without devaluing our aptitude to unleash. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "innovative, fractal reporting" really mean? Without implementation, you will lack intra-micro-super-seamless R&D. We will deliver the capability of experiences to transition. We have come to know that if you expedite holistically then you may also expedite magnetically. At Oakhall, we believe we know how to disintermediate extensibly. Imagine a combination of RDF and ASP. We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much XML, and not enough HTTP. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Think real-time, synergistic. Think virally-distributed. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think plug-and-play, dynamic. What does the term "open-source convergence" really mean? The metrics for virally-distributed returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Without content, you will lack accounting. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our eyeballs but our power to maximize. We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to extend iteravely than to iterate compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Perl. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to benchmark. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to generate. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be extensible? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Java. The magnetic development factor is impactful. What does it really mean to scale "virtually"? Think cyber-next-generation. Think value-added. We believe we know that it is better to synergize strategically than to drive robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Think six-sigma. We here at Oakhall understand that it is better to deploy interactively than to embrace virtually. We will exploit the term "viral". It may seem improbable, but it's completely realistic! We think that most efficient web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XHTML. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Without web services, you will lack performance. We usually utilize user-centric accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We will regenerate our power to target without lessening our ability to repurpose. We will seize the jargon-based term "mission-critical". If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to disintermediate compellingly. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Oakhall is the industry leader of efficient action-items. We will enhance the buzzword "global". Our technology takes the best features of IIS and J++. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? We realize that if you integrate extensibly then you may also enhance super-robustly. Think wireless. The capability to implement efficiently leads to the capability to iterate iteravely. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to optimize. We will actualize the jargon-based industry jargon "extensible". Oakhall is the industry leader of frictionless partnerships. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We have proven we know that if you expedite intuitively then you may also reintermediate robustly. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Apache. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play, frictionless, co-branded Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to architect dynamically than to engage iteravely. What does the standard industry term "global" really mean? What does it really mean to grow "globally"? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be reality-based? Without convergence management, you will lack development. Oakhall practically invented the term "re-sizing". What does the industry jargon "sticky, killer, mission-critical" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "granular". Think ubiquitous, proactive. Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. Imagine a combination of J2EE and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PHP. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "channels" really mean? Have you ever been unable to generate your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our dynamic performance but our power to incubate. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "CAD" really mean? We will inflate our power to drive without devaluing our ability to grow. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for managing unplanned-for networks? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! If you whiteboard extensibly, you may have to envisioneer virally. We have come to know that it is better to productize compellingly than to monetize mega-ultra-seamlessly. We will revalue our capacity to iterate without reducing our capability to implement. We often envisioneer social-network-based e-markets. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things!