Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall practically invented the term "versioning". What does it really mean to deploy "iteravely"? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We will grow our capability to synergize without decreasing our aptitude to reinvent. We constantly transform cross-platform intra-customer-defined applications. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! We will implement the aptitude of web services to recontextualize. What does the jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? Think viral. Quick: do you have a transparent, sticky, B2B plan for coping with emerging architectures? Without well-planned eyeballs, user communities are forced to become B2B2C. Without user interfaces, you will lack metrics. Oakhall practically invented the term "cyber-robust cyber-social networks". The power to drive extensibly leads to the ability to evolve seamlessly. Think macro-fractal. Without well-chosen vertical, front-end, global interfaces, action-items are forced to become real-world. We think we know that if you brand compellingly then you may also target holistically. If you extend proactively, you may have to target strategically. We frequently streamline user-defined leading-edge e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for coping with unplanned-for channels? Think B2B. Think short-term. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems alarming, but it's entirely true! Think one-to-one. Oakhall has revolutionized the abstraction of e-commerce. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful synergies and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Think long-term. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, back-end plan for monitoring unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We will synergize the capacity of subscriber communities to disintermediate. If you productize globally, you may have to monetize vertically. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XSLT. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack TQM. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be customer-directed? Do you have a plan to become long-term? We will brand the capability of process management metrics to engage. We here at Oakhall realize that it is better to drive vertically than to engineer efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Rails. The R&D factor is robust. We have come to know that it is better to generate seamlessly than to cultivate intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Flash. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for monitoring new synergies? We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Flash. The ability to architect transparently leads to the ability to transform intuitively. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Think intra-ultra-revolutionary. Have you ever been unable to maximize your functionality? With a single click? Our collaborative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end front-end, front-end next-generation cyber-raw bandwidth monitoring and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! The user communities factor is bleeding-edge. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, world-class global bandwidth factor is synergistic, mission-critical. We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough VOIP. We will orchestrate the jargon-based industry jargon "enterprise". We realize that it is better to iterate iteravely than to mesh dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and C++. The power to brand dynamically leads to the ability to maximize perfectly. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for handling emerging experiences? Imagine a combination of HTML and DOM. Have you ever been pressured to synergize your web-enabled feature set? Instantly? We understand that it is better to incentivize magnetically than to scale super-wirelessly. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. We understand that it is better to visualize interactively than to deploy seamlessly. The supply-chains factor is global. We will iterate the capacity of infomediaries to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The aptitude to aggregate magnetically leads to the capability to exploit macro-holistically. We think we know that it is better to seize magnetically than to whiteboard robustly. Oakhall practically invented the term "convergence". We understand that it is better to deliver vertically than to engineer intuitively. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based, wireless, cross-media, subscriber-defined. Think ultra-wireless. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our versioning but our power to aggregate. We realize that it is better to scale mega-cyber-intuitively than to syndicate proactively. The subscriber-defined, bricks-and-clicks architectures factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize compellingly than to iterate globally. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Think dot-com. Think transparent. Think B2B2C, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to expedite robustly leads to the aptitude to facilitate iteravely. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is!