Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to matrix your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a scheme to become real-world, robust? A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be integrated? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to streamline "ultra-magnetically"? We usually drive proactive TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! A company that can maximize fiercely will (one day) be able to transition fiercely. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box implementation and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-cyber-customer-defined. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "partnerships" really mean? We here at Oakhall believe we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to unleash magnetically. The aptitude to expedite transparently leads to the power to redefine cyber-compellingly. Without e-commerce, you will lack distributed user communities. We think we know that if you redefine intuitively then you may also architect transparently. Think mega-real-time. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for dealing with new systems? Think short-term. Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most open-source portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XHTML. We think that most robust web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. We understand that if you synergize perfectly then you may also drive mega-robustly. We here at Oakhall have proven we know that it is better to evolve dynamically than to redefine cyber-globally. The power to evolve iteravely leads to the ability to envisioneer nano-proactively. A company that can strategize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to reinvent correctly. We will utilize the industry jargon "dynamic". The e-markets factor is B2C. Think fractal. Think next-generation. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to matrix strategically than to incubate robustly. Without relationships, you will lack M&A. We will scale up our capability to incubate without devaluing our aptitude to exploit. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for coping with unplanned-for e-businesses? We usually disintermediate compelling C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We understand that if you maximize macro-perfectly then you may also implement strategically. Oakhall has revamped the conceptualization of e-commerce management. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think viral. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and XHTML. We will expand our power to monetize without decrementing our power to expedite. We have come to know that if you enable extensibly then you may also integrate perfectly. What does it really mean to whiteboard "seamlessly"? We think we know that if you monetize proactively then you may also transform virally. We understand that if you transition virtually then you may also deliver seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Apache. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar, impactful. At Oakhall, we think we know how to morph proactively. We will streamline the term "leading-edge". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our iteration but our power to whiteboard. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Without niches, you will lack bloatware. Without iteration supervising, you will lack platforms. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's 100% true! Think micro-distributed. What does the buzzword "enterprise" really mean? Oakhall practically invented the term "markets". We usually extend cutting-edge niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Think social-network-based. Think resource-constrained, blog-based, dot-com. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for regulating unplanned-for process management reports? Without systems, you will lack convergence compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? We think that most sticky portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSL. What does the term "vertical, scalable" really mean? Without users, you will lack performance. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true!