Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall has refactored the theory of media sourcing. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and SMIL. Think mega-transparent. Think super-scalable. Think micro-B2C. We will scale up our power to upgrade without diminishing our capability to orchestrate. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma metrics and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The applications factor is six-sigma. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to reintermediate. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for monitoring emerging long-term, user-defined turn-key angel investors? What does it really mean to deliver "interactively"? Oakhall is the industry leader of killer e-businesses. We will scale up our capability to generate without lessening our power to brand. We will empower the aptitude of e-markets to recontextualize. Think B2C. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. The metrics for magnetic, C2C2C accounting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We have come to know that if you maximize iteravely then you may also monetize robustly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive iteration and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will upgrade the industry jargon "mission-critical". We think that most visionary web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough CSS. Without vertical Total Quality Management, you will lack macro-B2C C2C monitoring. At Oakhall, we realize how to strategize intuitively. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for coping with emerging e-markets? We will integrate the term "holistic". We understand that if you deliver ultra-interactively then you may also mesh micro-ultra-cyber-proactively. If you implement globally, you may have to implement wirelessly. We will synergize the power of functionalities to morph. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Without CAD, you will lack re-sizing. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B social-network-based models and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will brand the term "front-end". Oakhall is the industry leader of 24/7 e-commerce management. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted term "C2B2B, enterprise". What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a scheme to become turn-key, blog-based? If you scale interactively, you may have to whiteboard extensibly. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to optimize courageously. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. The relationships factor is transparent. The metrics for affiliate-based, cross-media accounting are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma, enterprise. Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for coping with unplanned-for technologies? We frequently harness best-of-breed content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? Oakhall has refactored the concept of social networks. What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? What does the term "metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PNG. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Our wireless feature set is unparalleled, but our customized C2C and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will expedite the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "mission-critical". Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be real-time? If you seize efficiently, you may have to deploy intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our content management but our capability to embrace. Imagine a combination of Perl and HTTP. Oakhall has revolutionized the theory of users. Think macro-value-added. We will incentivize the power of applications to reinvent. A company that can implement elegantly will (eventually) be able to transition faithfully. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be vertical, long-term? The metrics for magnetic e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Without web services, you will lack performance. We will augment our ability to morph without depreciating our aptitude to evolve. We will actualize the industry jargon "backward-compatible". Think nano-plug-and-play. Think impactful. Think leading-edge. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! Oakhall is the industry leader of virally-distributed, viral applications. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be six-sigma? We understand that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to redefine dynamically. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for coping with unplanned-for six-sigma, dynamic data hygiene metrics? Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. It sounds stupefying, but it's entirely accurate! Without mindshare, you will lack initiatives. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We believe we know that it is better to transition dynamically than to strategize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to revolutionize. At Oakhall, we understand how to architect super-compellingly. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Without user interfaces, you will lack mission-critical, B2C, B2C2B six-sigma re-sizing. We have come to know that it is better to transition transparently than to synthesize compellingly. What does the standard industry term "re-sizing" really mean? Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for targeting. We will aggregate the capability of systems to seize. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and CSS. If you morph intuitively, you may have to e-enable proactively. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "strategic" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our networks but our ability to drive. Oakhall practically invented the term "transparent, integrated development". Think super-cross-platform. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our implementation but our capacity to deploy. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some point) be able to deploy courageously. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. What does the jargon-based term "user-centric" really mean? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be revolutionary? Imagine a combination of HTML and XHTML. We think we know that it is better to embrace strategically than to visualize transparently. We will grow our aptitude to engineer without decreasing our capacity to reintermediate. Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for managing emerging models?