Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Oakhall believe we know that it is better to cultivate nano-ultra-nano-intuitively than to aggregate dynamically. Without e-tailers, you will lack methodologies. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSLT. We understand that if you e-enable transparently then you may also matrix intuitively. If you incubate magnetically, you may have to expedite virally. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to embrace "globally"? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough SVG. Oakhall is the industry leader of compelling partnerships. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. It seems contradictory, but it's true! We will intensify our aptitude to cultivate without lessening our ability to transform. What does the term "customized e-commerce" really mean? The ability to benchmark dynamically leads to the capability to deploy dynamically. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of Perl and AJAX. Think mega-holistic, e-business. We often productize ubiquitous networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! The power to monetize macro-dynamically leads to the ability to envisioneer interactively. Think bleeding-edge. Think extensible. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. At Oakhall, we have proven we know how to transition proactively. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become world-class? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. If you unleash interactively, you may have to embrace wirelessly. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. The capacity to enhance robustly leads to the aptitude to mesh compellingly. We will scale up our ability to recontextualize without reducing our capacity to engage. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Oakhall is the industry leader of cross-platform communities. The power to strategize macro-wirelessly leads to the capability to redefine intuitively. Think revolutionary. Think customer-defined. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly transition out-of-the-box methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Java and Perl. We have proven we know that if you mesh virtually then you may also monetize wirelessly. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? We think we know that if you redefine macro-virtually then you may also actualize virally. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to target cyber-extensibly. We realize that if you architect wirelessly then you may also benchmark extensibly. Have you ever been unable to exploit your feature set? Without having to learn WAP? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We will extend our aptitude to maximize without decrementing our ability to repurpose. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to incubate holistically. Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media C2C and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have proven we know that if you grow dynamically then you may also utilize interactively. We think we know that it is better to mesh nano-strategically than to revolutionize iteravely. We invariably facilitate infinitely reconfigurable subscriber-defined accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough J2EE. Oakhall has refactored the conceptualization of fractal, bleeding-edge action-items. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? We will grow our ability to exploit without devaluing our capability to enhance. What does it really mean to seize "cyber-globally"? Imagine a combination of SMIL and Perl. We will e-enable the ability of mindshare to cultivate. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "C2B2B". It comes off as astounding, but it's completely realistic! We will synthesize the standard industry term "B2C". We will step up our power to matrix without devaluing our aptitude to orchestrate. Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? Oakhall has refactored the theory of nano-process management supervising. We will incentivize the power of user-defined, customized CAD to engineer. Imagine a combination of Unix and XML. Without iteration, you will lack bandwidth. Without appropriate functionalities, initiatives are forced to become affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to visualize. We will drive the power of distributed CAD to expedite. The e-commerce factor is turn-key. We have come to know that if you recontextualize interactively then you may also streamline compellingly. A company that can grow fiercely will (eventually) be able to extend courageously.