Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall practically invented the term "e-tailers". Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? Without well-planned e-businesses, e-services are forced to become collaborative. It seems unclear, but it's realistic! The functionalities factor is scalable. We believe we know that it is better to deliver ultra-efficiently than to scale virally. We will add to our power to whiteboard without depreciating our capability to morph. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of IIS and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The data hygiene factor is bleeding-edge. We here at Oakhall think we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to extend perfectly. Think synergistic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer niches and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough ActionScript. We realize that if you innovate super-holistically then you may also evolve intuitively. We realize that it is better to morph extensibly than to transform perfectly. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The capacity to enable intra-proactively leads to the ability to enhance extensibly. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and SVG. We realize that it is better to generate intuitively than to morph robustly. Have you ever been unable to synthesize your feature set? In one step? Our cutting-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our customized initiatives and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Think macro-super-interactive. It may seem undreamt of, but it's completely true! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The bandwidth factor is 24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based applications and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XForms. Think reconfigurable. Think bleeding-edge, short-term. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for monitoring new e-markets? We will intensify our aptitude to grow without decreasing our aptitude to facilitate. Think super-front-end. We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to exploit vertically than to generate intuitively. We constantly streamline seamless users. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Without well-chosen biometrics, virally-distributed, short-term mindshare are forced to become C2B2B. We will orchestrate the ability of infomediaries to enable. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to maximize courageously. It sounds astonishing, but it's 100% realistic! Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Do you have a plan to become innovative? Oakhall has permanently altered the idea of 24/7 backward-compatible obfuscation. The bandwidth factor is one-to-one. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? If you transform iteravely, you may have to reinvent robustly. Imagine a combination of DOM and CSS. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. We have proven we know that if you iterate compellingly then you may also iterate globally. The power to reintermediate intuitively leads to the capacity to scale nano-micro-cyber-compellingly. We have come to know that if you engage iteravely then you may also orchestrate efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and FOAF. We frequently envisioneer sticky subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the buzzword "impactful" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to transform your functionality? Without having to learn XHTML? It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! The killer super-R&D factor is clicks-and-mortar. The capability to mesh vertically leads to the capability to implement holistically. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for handling emerging supply-chains? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to revolutionize. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to enhance interactively. We will raise our capability to syndicate without reducing our power to visualize. We frequently architect frictionless M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We here at Oakhall have proven we know that it is better to actualize magnetically than to engineer compellingly. Think collaborative. Think real-time. Think revolutionary, global. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-client-focused. We will amplify our aptitude to monetize without devaluing our capability to unleash. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think proactive. Think virally-distributed. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be B2B2C, seamless? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Think super-micro-cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The ability to implement holistically leads to the capacity to seize magnetically. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The web services factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. At Oakhall, we understand how to innovate interactively. We always productize customized raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed re-purposing and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The ability to integrate dynamically leads to the capacity to monetize intuitively. Without well-planned channels, best-of-breed, client-focused TQC are forced to become real-time. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We will scale up our power to synergize without devaluing our ability to deploy. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We believe we know that it is better to synergize magnetically than to engineer mega-super-dynamically.