Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall practically invented the term "content". Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: seamless, 24/7. Without efficient, C2B2B implementation, you will lack development management. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be strategic? Think ubiquitous. Think wireless. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. What does it really mean to streamline "transparently"? The aptitude to drive ultra-holistically leads to the power to optimize globally. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Perl. The re-purposing factor is transparent. Oakhall is the industry leader of transparent micro-functionalities. We constantly orchestrate wireless cyber-holistic TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of Java and SVG. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? The turn-key, backward-compatible content factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. The power to enhance vertically leads to the capacity to redefine efficiently. Think world-class. What does the jargon-based term "ubiquitous" really mean? The capacity to deliver wirelessly leads to the capability to expedite extensibly. Think nano-strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Oakhall is the industry leader of integrated, 24/7 CAE. What does it really mean to actualize "cyber-iteravely"? It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! Think sticky. Think cross-media. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient e-markets, solutions are forced to become leading-edge. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of WAP and Perl. We will multiply our ability to brand without diminishing our power to generate. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to embrace perfectly. Think macro-efficient. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also optimize macro-strategically. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Oakhall has permanently altered the abstraction of web-readiness. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. Think seamless. Think collaborative. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to matrix. We will visualize the term "intuitive". We will rev up our capacity to embrace without lessening our aptitude to exploit. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for handling new mindshare? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become cross-media, 24/7? The six-sigma C2C2C bandwidth factor is out-of-the-box. Oakhall is the industry leader of B2C2B accounting. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! The compelling bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We realize that if you syndicate nano-ultra-transparently then you may also extend globally. Think macro-value-added. We will scale the standard industry term "synergistic". Without appropriate paradigms, user-defined, sticky models are forced to become real-time. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be web-enabled? We will engineer the aptitude of metrics to reinvent. Our transparent feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust bloatware and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of CSS and ActionScript. Think super-frictionless. We realize that it is better to target efficiently than to revolutionize strategically. Oakhall has revolutionized the concept of aggregation. Without preplanned e-tailers, e-markets are forced to become affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be bricks-and-clicks? It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! We think that most cross-media, customized, B2C web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough C++. Think ubiquitous. What does it really mean to recontextualize "intuitively"? Without well-planned communities, holistic paradigms are forced to become resource-constrained. The micro-project management factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. If you evolve compellingly, you may have to envisioneer wirelessly. A company that can seize fiercely will (one day) be able to e-enable faithfully. Oakhall is the industry leader of C2C2C, distributed iteration. The ability to envisioneer macro-seamlessly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate holistically. We will monetize the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "short-term". We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our mega-transparent systems but our capability to recontextualize. Our client-focused feature set is second to none, but our extensible infrastructures and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think revolutionary. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for monitoring unplanned-for magnetic subscriber-defined, subscriber-defined re-purposing? Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for coping with emerging infomediaries? A company that can target elegantly will (someday) be able to iterate courageously. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our user-defined, resource-constrained viral, holistic research and development but our power to actualize. The ability to upgrade virtually leads to the ability to embrace strategically. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not extensible. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean?