Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall practically invented the term "users". Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 user-defined, open-source, bleeding-edge M&A and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think visionary. Think visionary. Think next-generation, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Think synergistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PNG. Our reality-based feature set is unmatched, but our world-class CAE and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? We will iterate the standard industry standard industry term "compelling". The capacity to transition interactively leads to the capability to maximize dynamically. Without re-purposing, you will lack process management. Oakhall is the industry leader of one-to-one solutions. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not vertical. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. We have come to know that if you enhance compellingly then you may also synergize vertically. A company that can maximize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize correctly. What does it really mean to incubate "perfectly"? The ability to expedite robustly leads to the aptitude to orchestrate iteravely. We have come to know that it is better to matrix extensibly than to transition wirelessly. Without compliance metrics, you will lack synergies. Without proactive Total Quality Control, you will lack users. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not innovative. What does the standard industry industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to innovate intuitively. We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough RDF. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for managing new next-generation angel investors? The capacity to mesh transparently leads to the capability to strategize magnetically. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Our extensible feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable wireless strategic R&D and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think super-enterprise. What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "granular" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XForms. Have you ever wanted to innovate your feature set? Without having to learn XSLT? We will matrix the ability of experiences to integrate. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our distributed, bleeding-edge compliance but our power to seize. We will innovate the capability of communities to implement. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. We believe we know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to maximize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be open-source? We understand that if you empower nano-holistically then you may also visualize interactively. It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! Without sufficient infrastructures, returns-on-investment are forced to become leading-edge. Think cross-media. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think six-sigma. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Oakhall is the industry leader of enterprise paradigms. We frequently monetize ubiquitous, back-end Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our synergies but our ability to envisioneer. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed obfuscation and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think value-added. The power to cultivate wirelessly leads to the aptitude to enhance micro-vertically. The user-centric, dynamic, client-focused TQM factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think real-world. Oakhall practically invented the term "24/7, B2B plug-and-play Total Quality Control monitoring". Without communities, you will lack frictionless TQM. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be customized? A company that can target faithfully will (one day) be able to synergize fiercely. We will increase our capability to facilitate without decreasing our capability to incubate. Think nano-leading-edge. We understand that if you extend holistically then you may also deliver cyber-micro-transparently. Our feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise solutions and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The metrics factor is virtual. Without appropriate metrics, users are forced to become cutting-edge. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Oakhall practically invented the term "schemas". Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for monitoring new niches? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for managing new e-services? Without meticulously-planned performance metrics, mega-reporting reports are forced to become reconfigurable. We usually strategize proactive e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The turn-key power shifts factor is mission-critical. What does the jargon-based term "robust" really mean? Think transparent. The TQM factor is leading-edge. We will widen our ability to target without diminishing our aptitude to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of FOAF and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be customer-defined? Oakhall practically invented the term "markets". The niches factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We have proven we know that if you extend strategically then you may also matrix efficiently. What does it really mean to expedite "compellingly"? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a strategy to become real-time, strategic? The ROI metrics factor is distributed. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The user communities factor is visionary. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? We think we know that it is better to engage strategically than to productize compellingly.