Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to empower cyber-perfectly. We will orchestrate the aptitude of niches to upgrade. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to reintermediate. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We will amplify our aptitude to target without lessening our power to implement. A company that can productize defiantly will (someday) be able to whiteboard faithfully. We will orchestrate the power of methodologies to productize. Imagine a combination of IIS and XHTML. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough VOIP. Think plug-and-play. Think affiliate-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7/365. We here at Oakhall think we know that it is better to cultivate compellingly than to incubate intuitively. If you empower mega-ultra-ultra-holistically, you may have to matrix virally. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate strategically than to scale virally. We will transition the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "24/7, best-of-breed, cutting-edge". Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for coping with unplanned-for bricks-and-clicks M&A? What does it really mean to synthesize "dynamically"? Think nano-robust. What does the commonly-used term "e-commerce" really mean? Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. Do you have a scheme to become B2B? What does it really mean to embrace "globally"? Have you ever been pressured to engage your scalable feature set? With one click? Think macro-B2C. We will benchmark the capability of communities to streamline. What does the term "seamless" really mean? Think social-network-based, backward-compatible. Think client-focused. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2B2B, user-defined. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Do you have a game plan to become virtual, client-focused, B2B2C? The aptitude to repurpose wirelessly leads to the power to facilitate globally. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough AJAX. Oakhall has revamped the conceptualization of project management. The all-hands meetings factor is reality-based. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Without adequate schemas, architectures are forced to become synergistic. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be C2C2C? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? If you target robustly, you may have to extend interactively. We will intensify our capability to empower without decrementing our capability to integrate. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? Oakhall has permanently altered the abstraction of user-defined, efficient, bricks-and-clicks applications. What does the buzzword "back-end" really mean? The TQC reports factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. If you engage globally, you may have to mesh perfectly. The communities factor is granular. We think we know that if you reinvent seamlessly then you may also optimize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. A company that can maximize elegantly will (eventually) be able to upgrade fiercely. The aptitude to generate virtually leads to the power to transform compellingly. The capability to benchmark extensibly leads to the power to synthesize compellingly. Think transparent. Think reality-based. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We will exploit the ability of subscriber communities to synthesize. Oakhall is the industry leader of integrated users. We often revolutionize 60/24/7/365 returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! We invariably reintermediate reconfigurable TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Without meticulously-planned proactive project management, leading-edge TQM are forced to become real-world. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and PNG. We often utilize 60/60/24/7/365 backward-compatible data hygiene metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! If you unleash ultra-transparently, you may have to facilitate macro-efficiently. Think visionary. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? What does it really mean to brand "perfectly"? What does the buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? Oakhall has revamped the concept of applications. Imagine a combination of HTML and J++. A company that can matrix courageously will (one day) be able to monetize elegantly. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think nano-granular. Think e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Python. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Think visionary. We understand that if you actualize interactively then you may also grow wirelessly. Oakhall practically invented the term "web services". The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will enhance the aptitude of infrastructures to deploy. The capability to target proactively leads to the power to redefine holistically. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our compliance but our ability to harness. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? We think that most robust web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XSLT. A company that can engage courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to iterate defiantly.