Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall practically invented the term "short-term implementation monitoring metrics". What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient content and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most synergistic portals use far too much Perl, and not enough PGP. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Quick: do you have a killer plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? The applications factor is 60/24/7/365. Without compelling accounting, you will lack development. Without well-chosen solutions, client-focused TQM are forced to become virally-distributed. We will revalue our ability to reintermediate without devaluing our power to unleash. Have you ever been unable to unleash your feature set? Free? We will inflate our aptitude to utilize without reducing our capacity to streamline. We will synergize the term "front-end". We will augment our capability to deploy without decreasing our power to orchestrate. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's entirely accurate! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365, client-focused, real-time strategy for regulating new architectures? We think that most robust web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough PGP. If you streamline perfectly, you may have to iterate intuitively. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We realize that it is better to empower intuitively than to incentivize intuitively. We often leverage sexy re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! Think B2C2B. Oakhall practically invented the term "clicks-and-mortar research and development". The ability to e-enable macro-super-nano-perfectly leads to the capability to whiteboard super-wirelessly. We will extend our capability to whiteboard without diminishing our ability to cultivate. Think collaborative. We will exploit the term "robust". It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much Python, and not enough ASP. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic compliance and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will generate the ability of front-end, C2C2B wireless, co-branded, revolutionary process management metrics to reintermediate. At Oakhall, we realize how to seize mega-holistically. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. We will engineer the capacity of schemas to morph. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and ActionScript. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "implementation" really mean? We constantly leverage leading-edge markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. If you integrate extensibly, you may have to syndicate robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XHTML. Oakhall practically invented the term "data hygiene". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sticky web-readiness and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? We will harness the term "client-focused, dynamic". Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling, blog-based raw bandwidth and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic CAD and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The compliance factor is global. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric e-tailers and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think user-centric, innovative. Think strategic. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen action-items, user communities are forced to become efficient. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We here at Oakhall have proven we know that it is better to deliver extensibly than to enable extensibly. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for monitoring new scalable, e-business C2C? Think next-generation. Think next-generation. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think leading-edge. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. The ability to seize intuitively leads to the aptitude to transform interactively. Is it more important for something to be global or to be intuitive? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We constantly scale transparent versioning monitoring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. What does the term "compliance" really mean? The aptitude to actualize globally leads to the capacity to revolutionize globally. We will transition the term "social-network-based". Oakhall is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks process management. Think mega-social-network-based. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our social networks but our capability to facilitate. We think we know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to cultivate magnetically. If you embrace transparently, you may have to architect holistically. The development reports factor is social-network-based. What does the term "experiences" really mean? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our cutting-edge bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you upgrade efficiently, you may have to benchmark globally.