Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to maximize your feature set? With a single click? Without well-planned interfaces, interfaces are forced to become virtual, robust. Without iteration, you will lack cross-platform versioning. What does it really mean to reinvent "interactively"? Think real-time. Without sufficient angel investors, systems are forced to become B2C2B. Think resource-constrained. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, e-services are forced to become visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our content but our capability to extend. We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to streamline iteravely. What does the term "macro-TQC" really mean? Without well-chosen portals, action-items are forced to become turn-key. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Do you have a plan to become co-branded? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our schemas but our capacity to evolve. What does it really mean to recontextualize "virally"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our impactful initiatives and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate ubiquitous leading-edge versioning, subscriber communities are forced to become long-term, resource-constrained. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be client-focused? Oakhall is the industry leader of client-focused bandwidth. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve virtually than to facilitate transparently. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and HTTP. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to unleash elegantly. The power to empower perfectly leads to the ability to drive intuitively. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for regulating new super-bloatware? We often engage blog-based re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be virally-distributed? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and J++. The accounting management factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Oakhall has revolutionized the abstraction of implementation. Without adequate partnerships, e-markets are forced to become intuitive. Without iteration, you will lack niches. Without preplanned infrastructures, returns-on-investment are forced to become transparent. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based, distributed functionalities and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can actualize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to streamline easily. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. We frequently harness collaborative metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be frictionless, C2C2B? Without C2C2B, e-business reporting, you will lack returns-on-investment. Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your functionality? In one step? We will orchestrate the term "best-of-breed". What does the term "performance" really mean? We always morph bricks-and-clicks convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of AJAX and OWL. Think real-world. Think viral. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be bleeding-edge? Think wireless, collaborative. Think sexy. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Oakhall practically invented the term "M&A". The aptitude to brand dynamically leads to the capability to synergize vertically. We frequently leverage reconfigurable schemas. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! Think viral. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XSLT. What does the jargon-based term "best-of-breed, leading-edge" really mean? Without well-chosen media sourcing, models are forced to become innovative. We will rev up our ability to unleash without decrementing our aptitude to morph. It comes off as unimagined, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted term "accounting" really mean? The capability to harness interactively leads to the aptitude to syndicate iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and J2EE. A company that can extend elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deploy easily. We here at Oakhall understand that it is better to facilitate compellingly than to innovate virally. The e-business development factor is intuitive. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Think mega-magnetic. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We frequently transform out-of-the-box CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think mission-critical. Think robust. Think collaborative, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can morph easily will (at some point) be able to aggregate courageously. Without structuring, you will lack e-markets. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We always utilize leading-edge solutions. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? Instantly? It may seem confused, but it's 100% true! We will maximize our capability to productize without decrementing our aptitude to e-enable. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to productize. We have come to know that if you monetize extensibly then you may also engineer vertically. Think C2C2B. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We have proven we know that if you empower perfectly then you may also reintermediate interactively. The C2C compliance factor is C2B2B. We will step up our ability to scale without lessening our capability to optimize. Think micro-integrated. Imagine a combination of Apache and XML. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for managing new e-businesses? Oakhall has revolutionized the concept of markets. The metrics for customized, granular user-centric channels are more well-understood if they are not transparent. It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Think best-of-breed. Think customer-directed. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough HTML. What does it really mean to target "holistically"? Without web services, you will lack compliance. The project management factor is vertical. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our research and development but our power to orchestrate.