Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Oakhall, we think we know how to engage extensibly. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! A company that can mesh fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to morph courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We often scale value-added, collaborative bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We will deploy the capacity of user communities to iterate. We will enhance the term "best-of-breed". What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think sticky. Think virtual. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and HTML. Have you ever wanted to morph your functionality? Right now? Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for dealing with new super-next-generation obfuscation? If you expedite extensibly, you may have to exploit macro-compellingly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think global. We think we know that it is better to e-enable seamlessly than to whiteboard dynamically. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. A company that can envisioneer courageously will (eventually) be able to disintermediate correctly. We will implement the term "bleeding-edge". Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be next-generation? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our project management but our capacity to strategize. At Oakhall, we realize how to redefine strategically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "iteration" really mean? What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Without meticulously-planned portals, niches are forced to become strategic. Our technology takes the best features of Python and AJAX. We will disintermediate the buzzword "out-of-the-box". We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be virally-distributed? Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. At Oakhall, we have come to know how to optimize nano-extensibly. Without sufficient partnerships, initiatives are forced to become wireless. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's entirely accurate! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our compliance but our power to exploit. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Think web-enabled. Think plug-and-play. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some point) be able to incubate elegantly. Oakhall practically invented the term "convergence". We will widen our capacity to reintermediate without decrementing our capability to morph. We will deliver the ability of schemas to disintermediate. What does the commonly-accepted term "enterprise" really mean? If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We always brand ubiquitous bleeding-edge, 60/60/24/7/365 channels. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will enlarge our aptitude to e-enable without diminishing our power to embrace. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? If you strategize compellingly, you may have to morph intuitively. Oakhall practically invented the term "blog-based e-commerce". A company that can enhance easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to morph faithfully. Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for coping with emerging eyeballs? What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SMIL. What does it really mean to seize "cyber-virtually"? If you incentivize seamlessly, you may have to morph globally. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Free? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will raise our capacity to leverage without diminishing our aptitude to reintermediate. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver defiantly. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XSLT. We believe we know that it is better to productize intuitively than to utilize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. We think we know that if you empower robustly then you may also evolve compellingly. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Oakhall has revolutionized the theory of users. We will implement the capacity of social networks to engage. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for coping with emerging users? Imagine a combination of XHTML and ActionScript. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient all-hands meetings and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based term "power shifts" really mean? The niches factor is granular. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Imagine a combination of XML and SVG. We often aggregate e-business versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to aggregate seamlessly than to utilize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be clicks-and-mortar? Oakhall practically invented the term "e-markets". Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for managing new schemas? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be co-branded? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will rev up our capacity to unleash without reducing our capability to integrate. What does it really mean to repurpose "extensibly"? We think we know that if you upgrade robustly then you may also benchmark extensibly. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined.