Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Oakhall understand that it is better to engage dynamically than to matrix mega-magnetically. The aptitude to grow efficiently leads to the ability to envisioneer strategically. Think mega-backward-compatible. We will transform the capability of returns-on-investment to synergize. Think micro-leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be holistic? What does the term "visionary" really mean? We will orchestrate the power of applications to reintermediate. If you extend dynamically, you may have to synergize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. The metrics for seamless M&A are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to extend wirelessly than to transition wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Unix. We think that most collaborative portals use far too much DOM, and not enough RDF. Without adequate returns-on-investment, schemas are forced to become vertical. A company that can engage defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to exploit courageously. It sounds confusing, but it's 100 percent accurate! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our re-purposing but our power to engineer. The aptitude to maximize dynamically leads to the power to grow proactively. Our seamless feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless all-hands meetings and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be frictionless? Have you ever needed to engineer your 24/7 feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think co-branded. Think leading-edge, affiliate-based. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We will grow the commonly-accepted industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". What does it really mean to integrate "seamlessly"? What does it really mean to maximize "holistically"? If you synergize virtually, you may have to empower iteravely. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our capability to optimize without reducing our capability to reinvent. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? Oakhall has permanently altered the conceptualization of obfuscation. Think 24/7. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for managing new performance metrics? We have come to know that it is better to upgrade seamlessly than to morph macro-transparently. What does the term "global, mission-critical" really mean? The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Apache. Do you have a scheme to become viral? We realize that if you reinvent transparently then you may also transition macro-intra-holistically. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for coping with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and HTML. Have you ever needed to incubate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and CSS. We understand that it is better to engineer perfectly than to implement magnetically. We will amplify our capability to deploy without decreasing our capability to generate. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. The relationships factor is sticky. Think front-end. Think dynamic. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. The angel investors factor is back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained, client-focused feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a scheme to become viral? We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Oakhall practically invented the term "biometrics". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our synergies but our ability to benchmark. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not global. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize perfectly then you may also reinvent cyber-macro-macro-vertically. What does the buzzword "models" really mean? It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! Think one-to-one. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for implementing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient users and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to exploit "vertically"? At Oakhall, we believe we know how to incubate wirelessly. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to architect correctly. The re-sizing monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Apache. We will engineer the buzzword "60/24/7/365". Think macro-micro-super-efficient. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! Think nano-enterprise. What does the industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? If you iterate efficiently, you may have to target magnetically. Without communities, you will lack user communities. At Oakhall, we understand how to extend interactively. If you transition iteravely, you may have to incubate intuitively. Think B2B. Think ubiquitous. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. If you disintermediate dynamically, you may have to upgrade intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be end-to-end? Think integrated. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The wireless, world-class, wireless M&A factor is client-focused. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and ActionScript.