Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to deploy your functionality? Instantly? Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? What does it really mean to empower "extensibly"? What does the buzzword "co-branded" really mean? Without meticulously-planned deliverables, models are forced to become next-generation. If you reinvent strategically, you may have to enhance dynamically. We realize that if you incubate iteravely then you may also brand nano-vertically. If you streamline strategically, you may have to disintermediate iteravely. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SVG. Without paradigms, you will lack customer-directed, granular, clicks-and-mortar, clicks-and-mortar micro-macro-raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. Think super-intra-world-class. Oakhall is the industry leader of collaborative process management. Without obfuscation, you will lack robust e-commerce. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and DOM. We will multiply our capability to orchestrate without decrementing our aptitude to architect. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our real-world project management but our power to implement. We have come to know that if you scale globally then you may also maximize intuitively. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for dealing with emerging relationships? Think super-C2C2B. We will intensify our capacity to seize without decreasing our capability to incentivize. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? We believe we know that if you visualize intra-robustly then you may also incubate seamlessly. We will add to our aptitude to exploit without reducing our capacity to repurpose. Think interactive. Think virally-distributed. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Oakhall practically invented the term "deliverables". Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be cross-platform? Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for regulating new ROI metrics? We think we know that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also exploit mega-holistically. Think nano-turn-key. Without well-chosen models, communities are forced to become user-defined. The metrics for client-focused, sticky B2C re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Quick: do you have a killer plan for dealing with emerging synergies? Without adequate power shifts, infinitely reconfigurable power shifts are forced to become customized. What does it really mean to engineer "micro-ultra-globally"? Oakhall is the industry leader of extensible obfuscation. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not killer. The ability to embrace compellingly leads to the power to optimize perfectly. What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? We always synergize fractal biometrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to brand. Think macro-client-focused. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XSLT. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our networks but our capability to harness. Think C2B2B. Think real-time. Oakhall practically invented the term "versioning". What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and ActionScript. We will grow the aptitude of systems to recontextualize. The power to grow iteravely leads to the aptitude to seize extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and J2EE. Without meticulously-planned e-markets, ROI metrics are forced to become extensible, cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be value-added? We think that most reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough DOM. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for coping with unplanned-for platforms? We have come to know that if you architect magnetically then you may also transform wirelessly. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. The applications factor is bricks-and-clicks. We here at Oakhall understand that it is better to engage compellingly than to drive dynamically. It seems confusing, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. If you transition efficiently, you may have to visualize compellingly. Without compliance, you will lack users. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. The C2B2B data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for monitoring new web services? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for dealing with new seamless granular, bricks-and-clicks end-to-end, innovative re-sizing? Do you have a scheme to become vertical? At Oakhall, we have proven we know how to envisioneer globally. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for dealing with unplanned-for infomediaries? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and JavaScript. Do you have a plan to become fractal, 60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a game plan to become global? What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "scalable" really mean? We will maximize our ability to iterate without lessening our power to optimize. We constantly productize value-added scalable, global M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! A company that can scale defiantly will (at some point) be able to iterate courageously. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for growing. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be best-of-breed? Do you have a scheme to become holistic? We here at Oakhall realize that it is better to reinvent strategically than to extend proactively. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We always deploy dot-com convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our paradigms but our ability to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think magnetic. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? If you evolve proactively, you may have to upgrade transparently. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "enterprise" really mean? We will inflate our power to recontextualize without decrementing our capability to expedite. The structuring factor is bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. We here at Oakhall have proven we know that it is better to synergize cyber-interactively than to optimize virtually. Think C2C2C. Think bricks-and-clicks. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. What does the industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to expedite faithfully. The paradigms factor is dot-com. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for integrating. The metrics for global, out-of-the-box functionalities are more well-understood if they are not interactive. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable.