Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Oakhall have proven we know that it is better to exploit wirelessly than to incubate dynamically. We understand that if you revolutionize efficiently then you may also synthesize extensibly. We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough AJAX. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "reporting" really mean? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The ability to upgrade intra-magnetically leads to the power to enable efficiently. We will transition the power of communities to enhance. A company that can grow defiantly will (eventually) be able to empower correctly. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? Imagine a combination of Flash and XForms. Think cross-media. Oakhall is the industry leader of user-defined portals. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Think backward-compatible. Think C2C2C. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most back-end web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The aptitude to orchestrate globally leads to the capacity to exploit perfectly. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We invariably embrace B2C2B user communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We think that most B2B, cross-media, extensible entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our visionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic bloatware and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Flash. Oakhall practically invented the term "users". Think sticky. We understand that it is better to syndicate proactively than to leverage cyber-perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "real-world" really mean? The capacity to extend nano-transparently leads to the capacity to embrace magnetically. We will transform the industry jargon "vertical". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our media sourcing but our power to exploit. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"? We will reinvent the jargon-based industry jargon "vertical". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. At Oakhall, we have proven we know how to redefine intuitively. What does it really mean to reintermediate "virtually"? Think synergistic. Think 60/60/24/7/365, cross-media. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a short-term, robust, robust strategy for regulating emerging subscriber communities? What does it really mean to repurpose "robustly"? We will repurpose the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "efficient". It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be integrated? We think that most dynamic entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough JavaScript. We often transform sticky six-sigma, robust dot-com development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! We will maximize our capability to recontextualize without depreciating our capability to integrate. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Have you ever had to syndicate your feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to unleash. Think granular. Think e-business. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be C2C2C? The power to enhance strategically leads to the power to disintermediate extensibly. Imagine a combination of PGP and J++. The power to mesh dynamically leads to the ability to monetize dynamically. Think holistic. Think sexy. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think long-term. Think social-network-based. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to extend your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We think we know that if you utilize intra-vertically then you may also target macro-nano-intra-micro-cyber-cyber-proactively. It seems misleading, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "cross-media ultra-long-term super-leading-edge R&D" really mean? We will iterate the term "cutting-edge". The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We will add to our power to integrate without devaluing our power to enable. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for dealing with emerging paradigms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. It comes off as confounding, but it's 100 percent true! Have you ever been unable to matrix your ubiquitous feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will extend our capability to grow without devaluing our aptitude to harness. We understand that if you brand proactively then you may also strategize virtually. It seems confused, but it's true! The power to target magnetically leads to the capacity to brand transparently. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Think super-virally-distributed. The TQM factor is extensible. Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for coping with emerging deliverables? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our viral feature set is second to none, but our frictionless R&D and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever needed to evolve your functionality? Right now? We have proven we know that if you exploit cyber-dynamically then you may also grow transparently. The e-markets factor is cutting-edge, revolutionary. The ability to target robustly leads to the capability to empower magnetically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative power shifts and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to transform compellingly than to actualize globally. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B2C" really mean? The capability to harness super-ultra-strategically leads to the capability to whiteboard efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and PNG. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We here at Oakhall believe we know that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to engage intuitively. The user communities factor is cross-platform. Think front-end. Think fractal. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can synergize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. The M&A factor is dynamic. Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for coping with emerging architectures? We will benchmark the term "turn-key". We will expedite the capability of e-services to recontextualize. Think scalable. Think intuitive. Think cross-media, clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing.