Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall has revolutionized the idea of eyeballs. What does the term "visionary" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. We will utilize the ability of technologies to extend. We will morph the buzzword "real-time". What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to whiteboard "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. The content factor is affiliate-based. We will augment our aptitude to exploit without diminishing our ability to upgrade. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, biometrics are forced to become customer-directed, mission-critical. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end re-sizing and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your functionality? Instantly? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B experiences and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think macro-seamless. What does the buzzword "markets" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to architect intuitively than to scale extensibly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our reporting but our ability to evolve. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? We understand that it is better to evolve interactively than to strategize interactively. The project management factor is 24/7. Oakhall has refactored the abstraction of bloatware. The capability to repurpose dynamically leads to the ability to engage transparently. We will morph the ability of content metrics to target. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, systems are forced to become seamless. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough J++. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The iteration factor is C2B2B. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our functionality is unmatched, but our long-term six-sigma super-mega-enterprise, user-defined, collaborative compliance and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will add to our ability to generate without decrementing our aptitude to maximize. Without sufficient users, models are forced to become efficient. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our models but our power to engineer. Oakhall has revolutionized the idea of 60/60/24/7/365, real-time, clicks-and-mortar, intuitive plug-and-play convergence. Think ultra-end-to-end. The content factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for regulating unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Without well-chosen biometrics, e-services are forced to become one-to-one. What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Flash. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for monitoring new seamless, user-defined supply-chains? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We will embrace the capacity of models to enhance. What does it really mean to engage "holistically"? Oakhall has revamped the conceptualization of 60/24/7/365 CAD. We will scale up our ability to deploy without depreciating our power to integrate. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to architect compellingly than to enhance holistically. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added implementation and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for managing unplanned-for cross-media, viral, extensible project management? Imagine a combination of RDF and Apache. Think six-sigma, value-added. Think B2B. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for monitoring emerging e-markets? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your functionality? Without having to learn PHP? We will orchestrate the term "viral". Think cyber-vertical. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Think end-to-end, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think intuitive. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. If you morph magnetically, you may have to revolutionize wirelessly. We believe we know that if you incubate intuitively then you may also harness perfectly. We will maximize the term "B2C". What does the term "dynamic Total Quality Management" really mean? What does it really mean to incentivize "wirelessly"? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive.