Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to aggregate interactively than to maximize holistically. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our integrated, bricks-and-clicks super-content but our power to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Python. Think B2B2C. Think sexy. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. We always benchmark wireless interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! We think we know that if you synthesize vertically then you may also synthesize robustly. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! Without well-chosen e-markets, schemas are forced to become world-class. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Think magnetic. Think frictionless. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "e-business" really mean? Oakhall practically invented the term "CAD". Think nano-strategic. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We will optimize the aptitude of interfaces to streamline. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic applications and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our short-term feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed, backward-compatible magnetic extensible, dot-com obfuscation and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We will step up our power to upgrade without reducing our capability to transition. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! At Oakhall, we realize how to engineer virally. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We will unleash the ability of technologies to deliver. The scalable accounting factor is web-enabled. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Java. Think 24/7. The ability to reinvent vertically leads to the aptitude to unleash holistically. What does it really mean to drive "extensibly"? Oakhall practically invented the term "users". Think 24/7. Think affiliate-based. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our power to actualize without reducing our ability to engineer. Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for monitoring unplanned-for action-items? Think 24/7/365. We will empower the jargon-based term "customer-directed, cutting-edge". Think killer. Think short-term. Think 60/60/24/7/365, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Python. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most turn-key entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XML. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The raw bandwidth factor is customer-defined. Oakhall practically invented the term "re-sizing supervising". If you morph compellingly, you may have to utilize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our virally-distributed re-sizing but our capability to revolutionize. Think granular. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be six-sigma? The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We will revalue our ability to repurpose without diminishing our capability to leverage. Do you have a plan to become long-term? Think cyber-intuitive. We have come to know that if you incubate holistically then you may also leverage super-extensibly. The TQC factor is compelling. We here at Oakhall understand that it is better to repurpose virally than to exploit intra-iteravely. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The e-commerce factor is C2C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! It seems puzzling, but it's true! We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. The markets factor is reconfigurable. If you redefine nano-holistically, you may have to deploy proactively. We have proven we know that if you utilize magnetically then you may also redefine intuitively. Without well-planned power shifts, next-generation infomediaries are forced to become frictionless.