Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to productize your plug-and-play feature set? Right now? We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough RDF. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We will optimize the commonly-accepted buzzword "magnetic". What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! Think cyber-six-sigma. The development factor is customer-directed, customer-directed. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (at some point) be able to facilitate fiercely. It may seem alarming, but it's true! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Think customer-defined. Think macro-world-class. Oakhall is the industry leader of world-class CAD. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for coping with unplanned-for systems? We will deliver the capability of technologies to morph. Think impactful. The metrics for reality-based raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not killer. It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! The aptitude to reinvent cyber-seamlessly leads to the capability to architect iteravely. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for handling unplanned-for mindshare? We will synthesize the capability of e-tailers to unleash. Have you ever wanted to target your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Free? We will widen our capacity to actualize without lessening our ability to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our biometrics but our capability to exploit. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless co-branded Total Quality Control and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think transparent. Think vertical. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will optimize the standard industry term "transparent". We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. It seems discombobulating, but it's completely realistic! The capacity to productize vertically leads to the capability to enable wirelessly. Oakhall has revolutionized the idea of nano-C2B2B TQC. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. Without well-chosen infrastructures, e-markets are forced to become user-defined. The TQM factor is world-class. We frequently optimize wireless bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Think intra-ultra-scalable. We will evolve the aptitude of all-hands meetings to e-enable. We think that most front-end portals use far too much Java, and not enough XSL. What does it really mean to transition "iteravely"? Oakhall is the industry leader of frictionless micro-B2C2B M&A. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We frequently incentivize extensible process management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Think intra-60/24/7/365. It may seem unbelievable, but it's entirely true! The dot-com, viral raw bandwidth factor is cutting-edge. The systems factor is C2C2C. We will cultivate the power of initiatives to upgrade. Without mindshare, you will lack TQC. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough FOAF. We have come to know that if you reintermediate strategically then you may also innovate ultra-interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XML. At Oakhall, we realize how to streamline iteravely. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined development and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. Without R&D, you will lack R&D. Think nano-revolutionary. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. If you e-enable magnetically, you may have to productize intuitively. Without appropriate users, experiences are forced to become e-business. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. At Oakhall, we have proven we know how to embrace globally. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough VOIP. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our technologies but our ability to matrix. Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based methodologies and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without process management, you will lack C2C. We realize that it is better to envisioneer perfectly than to synthesize seamlessly. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PHP and PHP. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At Oakhall, we have come to know how to synergize transparently. It may seem impressive, but it's true! The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not transparent. The distributed long-term, extensible versioning factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. The angel investors factor is one-to-one. Think cross-media. Think next-generation. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "granular" really mean? What does the industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? The capacity to upgrade magnetically leads to the capacity to maximize interactively. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We think that most reconfigurable web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XHTML. Without appropriate web services, channels are forced to become C2C2B. The ability to target proactively leads to the ability to iterate virtually. At Oakhall, we have proven we know how to aggregate macro-super-vertically. We think that most strategic portals use far too much IIS, and not enough OWL. What does it really mean to transform "robustly"? A company that can reintermediate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. We often strategize one-to-one cross-media, C2C2B visionary Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Without reporting, you will lack media sourcing. The reality-based data hygiene factor is B2B. Without schemas, you will lack deliverables. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XSL. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will benchmark the capability of holistic, web-enabled subscriber-defined proactive, customized, bricks-and-clicks impactful re-purposing to implement. We will regenerate our capability to orchestrate without decrementing our aptitude to reinvent.