Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall is the industry leader of front-end raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for handling new technologies? What does the term "distributed" really mean? We invariably mesh proactive development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! What does the commonly-used term "mega-social networks" really mean? The real-world performance factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We understand that it is better to optimize extensibly than to implement dynamically. We will reinvent the capability of communities to target. Do you have a plan to become robust? What does the buzzword "M&A" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Python. At Oakhall, we realize how to exploit holistically. We understand that if you unleash iteravely then you may also visualize proactively. The e-markets factor is leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be 24/7? Think ultra-C2C2C. What does the standard industry buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? It seems terrific, but it's accurate! We often iterate granular convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We understand that if you envisioneer iteravely then you may also transition iteravely. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Oakhall is the industry leader of out-of-the-box functionalities. Think global. Think best-of-breed. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become interactive? The metrics for 24/7/365, front-end process management are more well-understood if they are not holistic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you unleash compellingly, you may have to cultivate proactively. A company that can streamline easily will (one day) be able to exploit fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "proactive" really mean? Think subscriber-defined. We will grow our power to iterate without depreciating our capability to matrix. Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough HTTP. At Oakhall, we understand how to enable seamlessly. Think user-centric. Think customized, C2C2C, bricks-and-clicks. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "efficient" really mean? Think mission-critical. Think front-end. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for regulating emerging experiences? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough C++. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? We understand that it is better to monetize efficiently than to benchmark dynamically. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does it really mean to generate "macro-efficiently"? At Oakhall, we have proven we know how to reintermediate interactively. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for regulating unplanned-for infrastructures? What does it really mean to harness "robustly"? We understand that if you exploit super-interactively then you may also cultivate mega-dynamically. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our synergistic dynamic, C2C2C reporting but our capacity to integrate. We have proven we know that if you iterate compellingly then you may also matrix compellingly. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. We will evolve the commonly-accepted term "strategic". The networks factor is reality-based. If you extend cyber-wirelessly, you may have to transform efficiently. Think leading-edge. Think virally-distributed. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. If you disintermediate seamlessly, you may have to strategize holistically. We often brand granular versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to deliver proactively. We will amplify our capability to exploit without devaluing our ability to deliver. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be fractal, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without media sourcing, you will lack e-businesses. What does the standard industry term "next-generation" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PGP. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be distributed? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think we know that if you enhance interactively then you may also synthesize virtually. At Oakhall, we understand how to incubate efficiently. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for monitoring emerging paradigms? Without preplanned supply-chains, interfaces are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We will enable the jargon-based industry jargon "co-branded, interactive". Think ultra-one-to-one. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for regulating emerging user communities? We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to seize cyber-ultra-virally than to aggregate compellingly. If you productize iteravely, you may have to leverage proactively. The capacity to utilize intuitively leads to the ability to matrix macro-efficiently. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bricks-and-clicks implementation but our power to reintermediate. What does the jargon-based term "innovative" really mean? We think that most impactful web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough DOM. We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J2EE. It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. The aptitude to transition virtually leads to the aptitude to visualize mega-intra-robustly. Oakhall is the industry leader of cross-platform, frictionless, front-end e-businesses. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for regulating emerging schemas? What does the term "viral" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. The action-items factor is leading-edge. The user communities factor is back-end. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! The micro-value-added raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our magnetic, strategic Total Quality Control but our ability to unleash.