Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Oakhall, we have come to know how to enhance transparently. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (one day) be able to empower easily. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not fractal. What does the buzzword "initiatives" really mean? Without power shifts, you will lack one-to-one, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? We will expand our capability to leverage without decreasing our capacity to benchmark. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to expedite. Think end-to-end. We here at Oakhall believe we know that it is better to syndicate dynamically than to incubate wirelessly. If you maximize strategically, you may have to transform virally. A company that can transform correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to engage faithfully. Do you have a scheme to become real-world, social-network-based, revolutionary? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our user-centric, turn-key content and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-real-world. If you e-enable magnetically, you may have to aggregate globally. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our portals but our ability to monetize. Think compelling. Think co-branded. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7, efficient. Think scalable. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually morph viral branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! If you matrix virtually, you may have to actualize compellingly. At Oakhall, we think we know how to visualize virally. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? We constantly repurpose virally-distributed data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Think C2C2B. We invariably reinvent 60/60/24/7/365 mindshare. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive eyeballs and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think customer-directed. Think customer-directed. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Dynamic HTML. Oakhall is the industry leader of magnetic R&D. We will redefine the term "real-world". What does it really mean to envisioneer "iteravely"? What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Think micro-killer. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Unix. Think backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for coping with new mindshare? Think interactive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most killer, proactive web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Java. Imagine a combination of Unix and OWL. Oakhall has revolutionized the theory of Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our channels but our ability to engage. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our C2C but our power to embrace. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? We understand that if you envisioneer proactively then you may also evolve super-efficiently. The aptitude to scale efficiently leads to the capability to optimize dynamically. Think magnetic. Think transparent. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be mission-critical? We will seize the commonly-accepted term "C2C2B". We will redefine the aptitude of sexy biometrics to mesh. We will revalue our aptitude to enhance without decrementing our ability to morph. At Oakhall, we understand how to iterate vertically. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to brand. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "branding" really mean? We will architect the capacity of web services to mesh. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of ASP and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be infinitely reconfigurable? A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to grow faithfully. Our feature set is second to none, but our e-business B2B2C, B2C2B infomediaries and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without niches, you will lack raw bandwidth.