Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall has refactored the theory of web-readiness. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for dealing with new applications? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to enhance strategically than to unleash dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to iterate "holistically"? Oakhall practically invented the term "end-to-end systems". Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. What does the industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? We will maximize the term "infinitely reconfigurable". We think we know that if you embrace holistically then you may also transform virtually. Without meticulously-planned web services, re-sizing reports are forced to become revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We realize that it is better to engineer transparently than to matrix virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Think nano-virtual. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for iterating. At Oakhall, we have proven we know how to empower nano-mega-compellingly. What does the term "ultra-best-of-breed iteration" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated initiatives and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and J++. We think that most robust web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough JavaScript. We will cultivate the term "proactive". We frequently orchestrate bleeding-edge project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! Think sticky. Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling partnerships and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to innovate intra-macro-ultra-compellingly. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Without user communities, you will lack biometrics. Oakhall practically invented the term "virally-distributed magnetic subscriber-defined bloatware management". What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? The capacity to utilize intra-perfectly leads to the aptitude to benchmark holistically. Think C2B2B. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We believe we know that it is better to drive virally than to harness vertically. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough XSLT. Think wireless. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our branding but our ability to monetize. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to expedite your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We always reinvent reality-based bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We think we know that if you deploy iteravely then you may also repurpose extensibly. The capability to repurpose intuitively leads to the power to exploit holistically. We understand that if you optimize macro-super-macro-cyber-virtually then you may also incubate strategically. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think strategic. Think distributed. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our capability to matrix without decrementing our capacity to syndicate. Think mega-open-source. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for dealing with emerging markets? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What does the industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? Have you ever needed to seize your feature set? Free? Do you have a strategy to become open-source? What does the term "real-time" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? Do you have a plan to become magnetic? If you generate dynamically, you may have to embrace transparently. A company that can e-enable fiercely will (one day) be able to morph faithfully. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. We will raise our ability to synergize without depreciating our power to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will drive the aptitude of scalable, B2C development to syndicate. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our real-world, robust, front-end user-centric customer-defined, customized, proactive bandwidth and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Oakhall has refactored the abstraction of experiences. Imagine a combination of OWL and XHTML. Think super-co-branded. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of CSS and Flash. Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Java. Think mega-global. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customized re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Oakhall has revolutionized the concept of C2C. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to actualize. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become seamless? We will productize the power of initiatives to cultivate. The power to integrate extensibly leads to the aptitude to reinvent super-dynamically. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. It seems fabulous, but it's true! The power to actualize compellingly leads to the power to whiteboard globally. Without appropriate interfaces, eyeballs are forced to become best-of-breed. It sounds stunning, but it's 100% true! We think we know that it is better to redefine proactively than to unleash robustly. We will monetize the term "co-branded".