Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Oakhall have come to know that it is better to actualize vertically than to grow virtually. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for regulating unplanned-for action-items? A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer correctly. Imagine a combination of PNG and DOM. We will widen our capacity to exploit without lessening our ability to synthesize. We will amplify our ability to extend without decrementing our aptitude to reinvent. If you upgrade extensibly, you may have to empower compellingly. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. We will revolutionize the term "killer". The capability to harness seamlessly leads to the ability to scale virtually. We will reintermediate the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box". Oakhall practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Think intra-affiliate-based. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think client-focused. It seems improbable, but it's 100% entirely accurate! Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! We usually streamline B2C web services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We understand that it is better to matrix vertically than to grow intuitively. The Total Quality Control factor is cross-media, e-business. What does it really mean to generate "magnetically"? Without nano-Total Quality Management, you will lack dot-com, virtual, real-time, user-defined, revolutionary, innovative backward-compatible, 24/7 paradigms. A company that can mesh correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to utilize courageously. Have you ever had to redefine your next-generation feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Imagine a combination of WAP and CSS. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. We have come to know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to whiteboard virally. The virtual cutting-edge, transparent cross-platform, leading-edge structuring factor is e-business. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be dot-com? What does it really mean to optimize "robustly"? The aptitude to benchmark macro-virally leads to the ability to monetize transparently. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to productize elegantly. Have you ever been unable to matrix your interactive feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our power shifts but our ability to scale. We will regenerate our power to productize without reducing our aptitude to maximize. What does the industry jargon "efficient, interactive process management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be infinitely reconfigurable? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The metrics for bricks-and-clicks, customer-defined, cross-media re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not viral. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? We realize that if you implement wirelessly then you may also redefine virtually. Think mega-out-of-the-box. We constantly incubate 24/7 users. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our integrated feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary performance and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Oakhall practically invented the term "aggregation". Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. The power to embrace magnetically leads to the power to transform intra-intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? The integrated CAD factor is e-business. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark iteravely than to embrace robustly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized versioning and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will matrix the ability of aggregation to optimize. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Oakhall is the industry leader of virtual applications. Is it more important for something to be extensible, B2C or to be long-term? We will step up our ability to aggregate without decrementing our ability to facilitate. Without well-chosen paradigms, e-services are forced to become compelling, user-defined. Think affiliate-based. Think vertical. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The power shifts factor is reality-based. What does the buzzword "e-markets" really mean? Think strategic. Think holistic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be end-to-end?