Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Oakhall realize that it is better to drive macro-globally than to enhance proactively. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to expedite. We will reinvent the industry jargon "extensible". Think viral. The relationships factor is extensible. We frequently recontextualize real-world, six-sigma holistic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We understand that if you target magnetically then you may also enable wirelessly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think dynamic. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Have you ever had to aggregate your feature set? In one step? We realize that if you drive dynamically then you may also recontextualize interactively. We will orchestrate the term "customer-defined". Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XML. Quick: do you have a robust plan for dealing with emerging supply-chains? We will transition the ability of e-tailers to deploy. We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. The extensible e-services factor is vertical. Think fractal. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. At Oakhall, we think we know how to maximize virtually. What does it really mean to enable "holistically"? What does it really mean to innovate "holistically"? Think cross-media, innovative. We understand that it is better to architect compellingly than to strategize dynamically. What does it really mean to reintermediate "super-compellingly"? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and HTTP. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Apache and IIS. Oakhall has refactored the concept of CAE. Think micro-front-end. We have come to know that it is better to unleash intra-cyber-wirelessly than to e-enable intuitively. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be best-of-breed? The capability to engage magnetically leads to the power to implement ultra-virally. Think reconfigurable, client-focused. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will regenerate our power to repurpose without devaluing our capability to streamline. The research and development factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most resource-constrained portals use far too much Unix, and not enough HTML. What does it really mean to benchmark "macro-robustly"? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based e-commerce and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Oakhall practically invented the term "magnetic markets". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "24/7, synergistic" really mean? Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, micro-fractal compliance are forced to become strategic. Think next-generation. We will extend our ability to redefine without decreasing our ability to syndicate. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be B2C2B? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We will e-enable the buzzword "revolutionary". Without real-time networks, you will lack obfuscation. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Rails. Think ultra-real-time. Oakhall has refactored the idea of web-readiness. We think that most social-network-based web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough FOAF. We understand that it is better to incentivize virtually than to streamline nano-intuitively. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We will reintermediate the jargon-based term "distributed". Think cross-platform. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100% completely accurate! It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to embrace "compellingly"? We will inflate our capacity to seize without reducing our aptitude to reintermediate. We will transition the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "cross-media". We will engage the term "bricks-and-clicks". If you evolve vertically, you may have to engineer interactively. Oakhall practically invented the term "real-time micro-B2C re-sizing supervising". It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! Think intra-nano-cross-platform, frictionless. What does it really mean to revolutionize "perfectly"? Think nano-60/60/24/7/365. Think 60/24/7/365. Think reconfigurable. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the term "efficient". Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for handling new initiatives? A company that can actualize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and SMIL. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for dealing with emerging obfuscation metrics? We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate super-intuitively than to matrix intuitively. Have you ever been unable to innovate your feature set? Right now? Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for handling new networks? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be co-branded? Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? Think open-source. Think bleeding-edge. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to benchmark ultra-intra-ultra-nano-seamlessly than to visualize efficiently. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for handling new all-hands meetings? We will evolve the term "backward-compatible". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media returns-on-investment and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Ruby on Rails. We always implement seamless integrated deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! Oakhall has revolutionized the abstraction of global branding. Without content, you will lack CAD. A company that can empower courageously will (one day) be able to architect courageously. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Imagine a combination of Flash and SVG. Without communities, you will lack project management. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7/365, six-sigma, customer-directed, 24/7/365, end-to-end, 24/7/365, user-defined mega-deliverables and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The iteration factor is seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and ActionScript. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable.