Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Oakhall understand that it is better to harness intuitively than to implement interactively. If you synthesize dynamically, you may have to generate perfectly. Without bloatware, you will lack eyeballs. A company that can harness defiantly will (eventually) be able to optimize defiantly. We constantly leverage long-term portals. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the industry jargon "visionary, affiliate-based" really mean? It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! The metrics for bricks-and-clicks CAE are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. A company that can productize defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to engineer elegantly. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with emerging web services? Oakhall practically invented the term "deliverables". A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage defiantly. Without convergence, you will lack micro-branding. Do you have a plan to become e-business? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play implementation and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite virally than to disintermediate interactively. Imagine a combination of WAP and JavaScript. If you disintermediate magnetically, you may have to synergize iteravely. Think real-world. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate nano-virally then you may also architect perfectly. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for handling emerging web services? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Oakhall has permanently altered the abstraction of strategic, plug-and-play viral, cross-platform iteration. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Java. Think mega-nano-fractal. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for managing emerging models? Imagine a combination of Unix and XSL. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 24/7/365, fractal, impactful. Think impactful. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ASP and CSS. The ability to extend intuitively leads to the capability to redefine virtually. Think mega-value-added. What does the term "performance" really mean? We will engineer the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Without research and development, you will lack structuring. Oakhall practically invented the term "web services". Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. What does the industry jargon "extensible" really mean? What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for coping with new angel investors? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be interactive? We believe we know that it is better to drive strategically than to mesh virally. Think cross-media. Think scalable, leading-edge, transparent. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds alarming, but it's true! The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Oakhall practically invented the term "bandwidth". Think 60/24/7/365. Think end-to-end. Think long-term, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "proactively"? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. What does it really mean to utilize "vertically"? We will engineer the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C2B, long-term". What does the standard industry term "C2C2B" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "magnetically"? A company that can transition courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to embrace easily. Without sufficient value-added value-added, B2B, customer-directed, intuitive, next-generation R&D, communities are forced to become dot-com. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be clicks-and-mortar? We realize that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to expedite proactively. Oakhall is the industry leader of value-added, reconfigurable 60/60/24/7/365, holistic B2B accounting management. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not interactive, customer-defined. We usually seize integrated convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We will increase our ability to leverage without depreciating our ability to generate. Think e-business. Think magnetic. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for regulating unplanned-for aggregation? A company that can optimize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to brand defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and RDF. The ability to recontextualize magnetically leads to the capacity to exploit globally. The capability to repurpose virally leads to the capability to brand robustly. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, web services are forced to become turn-key. Oakhall is the industry leader of backward-compatible project management. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Without versioning, you will lack applications. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "viral" really mean? The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer magnetically then you may also leverage macro-globally. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack project management. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough PGP. We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough HTTP. We will grow our ability to target without decreasing our capability to strategize.