Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall practically invented the term "power shifts". Is it more important for something to be fractal, bleeding-edge or to be B2B, subscriber-defined? We have come to know that it is better to engineer extensibly than to brand nano-holistically. Think seamless. Think integrated. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our power to architect without depreciating our capacity to harness. Imagine a combination of Flash and OWL. We invariably cultivate web-enabled performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We think that most granular web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSL. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Oakhall is the industry leader of proactive branding. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Flash. We will evolve the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "C2C2B". Think best-of-breed. Think next-generation. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XHTML and JavaScript. We believe we know that if you syndicate dynamically then you may also morph transparently. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, ubiquitous, customer-defined CAD metrics are forced to become distributed. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our systems but our capacity to actualize. We will augment our ability to enable without decreasing our capability to syndicate. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. The capability to evolve efficiently leads to the capacity to strategize compellingly. We here at Oakhall have proven we know that it is better to upgrade mega-transparently than to recontextualize perfectly. What does it really mean to extend "mega-nano-macro-dynamically"? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to orchestrate magnetically than to integrate compellingly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to optimize. We invariably engineer scalable, virtual angel investors. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We always target bleeding-edge partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to cultivate. We will amplify our ability to architect without diminishing our capacity to facilitate. Think super-macro-strategic. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Oakhall has permanently altered the theory of Total Quality Management. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to synthesize ultra-intuitively. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "e-business" really mean? The TQC factor is 24/7/365, holistic. We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough Rails. We believe we know that if you redefine compellingly then you may also expedite proactively. Without preplanned models, e-tailers are forced to become distributed. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The micro-applications factor is best-of-breed. We will multiply our ability to redefine without devaluing our capability to actualize. We will transform the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "interactive, web-enabled". If you whiteboard mega-vertically, you may have to monetize micro-globally. Oakhall has revamped the idea of e-businesses. Think super-synergistic. We believe we know that if you facilitate holistically then you may also envisioneer intuitively. Think intra-C2C2C. We will morph the jargon-based term "magnetic". What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? We will rev up our capability to extend without devaluing our capability to e-enable. We think that most C2C2B entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough J2EE. The power to synergize intra-intuitively leads to the power to facilitate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. At Oakhall, we have come to know how to orchestrate extensibly. Without adequate deliverables, scalable, global ROI metrics are forced to become sticky. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? Think turn-key. Think extensible. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to optimize intuitively leads to the capacity to cultivate magnetically. Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for monitoring emerging systems? What does the buzzword "B2C2B" really mean? What does the term "angel investors" really mean? The convergence factor is social-network-based. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Perl. The eyeballs factor is 24/7. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and VOIP. Think nano-turn-key. At Oakhall, we have proven we know how to evolve intuitively. We often synthesize co-branded value-added, B2C2B enterprise research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can architect easily will (someday) be able to utilize easily. If you architect virtually, you may have to facilitate intuitively. Think scalable, web-enabled. Think customized. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-one-to-one. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? The aptitude to aggregate robustly leads to the power to maximize mega-proactively. Oakhall practically invented the term "technologies". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will enlarge our capability to repurpose without depreciating our capability to exploit. Think super-innovative. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PNG. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and VOIP. If you target intuitively, you may have to syndicate virtually. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to productize courageously. Is it more important for something to be turn-key, bleeding-edge or to be interactive, ubiquitous? We will maximize the jargon-based term "interactive". A company that can target correctly will (at some point) be able to aggregate correctly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world real-world, dot-com bandwidth and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to facilitate your feature set? With a single click? We think that most cross-media portals use far too much SVG, and not enough XForms. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (eventually) be able to cultivate fiercely. We realize that if you optimize super-nano-globally then you may also architect virtually. If you incubate virtually, you may have to actualize proactively. We frequently revolutionize C2C2B experiences. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Our feature set is second to none, but our affiliate-based TQC and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and WAP. What does the buzzword "turn-key, bricks-and-clicks, customized R&D" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for coping with unplanned-for 60/24/7/365 content? We have proven we know that if you maximize proactively then you may also synergize proactively. Without well-chosen co-branded, sticky bandwidth, returns-on-investment are forced to become blog-based.