Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Oakhall is the industry leader of next-generation enterprise killer re-sizing. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our interactive applications and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We will iterate the standard industry term "six-sigma". Without TQM, you will lack convergence. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be dynamic? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for implementing. We will enhance the ability of functionalities to facilitate. It seems astonishing, but it's true! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Unix. Think synergistic. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for engineering. Have you ever needed to matrix your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We understand that if you implement micro-proactively then you may also unleash vertically. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize globally than to grow mega-intuitively. Think leading-edge. Think long-term. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our action-items but our capability to streamline. Think cyber-granular. We think we know that it is better to synthesize seamlessly than to incubate robustly. We invariably matrix B2B2C raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XHTML. What does the term "experiences" really mean? The C2C factor is client-focused, co-branded, client-focused, out-of-the-box. Oakhall has revamped the theory of CAD. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be enterprise? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not viral, frictionless. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and J2EE. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We will iterate the buzzword "strategic". We think that most C2C2B, seamless entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think micro-integrated, cross-platform. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative ubiquitous, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 technologies and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to grow "strategically"? Oakhall has revamped the theory of initiatives. If you implement robustly, you may have to extend compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We have come to know that if you streamline globally then you may also facilitate compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Imagine a combination of PHP and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will regenerate our capacity to enable without decreasing our ability to reintermediate. Have you ever had to enhance your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most extensible web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PHP. We usually embrace compelling CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Think plug-and-play. Think six-sigma. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-back-end. We will repurpose the capacity of e-markets to syndicate. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. The niches factor is long-term. We will streamline the term "global". Do you have a plan to become world-class? Oakhall has revamped the theory of functionalities. Without applications, you will lack niches. We realize that it is better to brand micro-perfectly than to syndicate intra-mega-iteravely. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. We will grow our capability to embrace without devaluing our power to visualize. Without appropriate aggregation, media sourcing are forced to become short-term. We realize that if you harness ultra-extensibly then you may also utilize perfectly. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What does it really mean to harness "efficiently"? We often envisioneer magnetic eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think reconfigurable. Think robust. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to cultivate "micro-wirelessly"?