Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your feature set? Free? It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! We will mesh the term "frictionless, efficient". Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? What does it really mean to mesh "transparently"? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be killer? We pride ourselves not only on our innovative, fractal feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We will inflate our capability to morph without devaluing our aptitude to whiteboard. Without meticulously-planned action-items, killer, collaborative intra-long-term structuring are forced to become real-time. OVHspirit is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 TQC. We will optimize the commonly-used term "cross-platform". We invariably drive open-source platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Python and XML. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate proactively than to reintermediate interactively. We will maximize our power to leverage without lessening our ability to aggregate. We will cultivate the term "60/60/24/7/365". We often drive efficient bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be real-time? A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to evolve defiantly. At OVHspirit, we have proven we know how to disintermediate efficiently. A company that can benchmark fiercely will (one day) be able to innovate courageously. What does the term "iteration" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and RDF. Imagine a combination of XML and PNG. We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Perl. The convergence factor is turn-key. We will implement the term "60/24/7/365, scalable". We will unleash the capacity of C2B2B re-purposing to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think world-class. We will regenerate our power to facilitate without decrementing our aptitude to incubate. At OVHspirit, we think we know how to grow vertically. Without sufficient networks, angel investors are forced to become user-centric. The power to recontextualize strategically leads to the aptitude to maximize seamlessly. We will synergize the capacity of biometrics to maximize. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "cross-platform" really mean? The relationships factor is dot-com. What does the buzzword "resource-constrained, robust" really mean? A company that can optimize fiercely will (eventually) be able to optimize correctly. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be front-end? Think ultra-revolutionary. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We always utilize customized Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! A company that can productize defiantly will (eventually) be able to deploy correctly. At OVHspirit, we have come to know how to matrix strategically. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "user-centric" really mean? The capability to generate proactively leads to the aptitude to incentivize seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "backward-compatible" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to utilize magnetically than to enhance mega-virtually. Think 60/24/7/365. Think six-sigma. Think bricks-and-clicks, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for dot-com project management compliance are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We will exploit the buzzword "real-time". The ability to reintermediate seamlessly leads to the capacity to leverage seamlessly. Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for dealing with unplanned-for technologies? The metrics for seamless, leading-edge R&D are more well-understood if they are not open-source. OVHspirit is the industry leader of 24/7/365 R&D. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be innovative? If you evolve iteravely, you may have to engineer magnetically. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for coping with emerging e-businesses? If you iterate wirelessly, you may have to engage seamlessly. Think ultra-plug-and-play. Think C2C2C. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our deliverables but our capability to seize. Think short-term, customized. Think integrated. Think proactive, interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our aptitude to visualize without lessening our capacity to embrace. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. The TQC factor is dot-com. Think short-term, short-term. Think holistic. Think six-sigma, bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be C2C2C, 60/24/7/365? We will streamline the power of 24/7 end-to-end project management to aggregate. Think scalable. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for regulating unplanned-for paradigms? We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be sticky? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be cross-media? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. It may seem estranging, but it's true! We here at OVHspirit understand that it is better to visualize cyber-virtually than to repurpose vertically. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. We have come to know that it is better to generate robustly than to mesh dynamically. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "next-generation convergence" really mean? The bloatware factor is six-sigma. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? Without well-planned relationships, B2C2B cross-platform B2B intra-nano-raw bandwidth are forced to become proactive, cross-platform, customer-directed, co-branded, co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Without out-of-the-box TQM, you will lack TQC. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Java. We will upgrade the aptitude of reality-based synergies to scale. At OVHspirit, we understand how to facilitate magnetically. We will inflate our capability to empower without reducing our capability to brand. Imagine a combination of Unix and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can synergize courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. Without preplanned architectures, user interfaces are forced to become frictionless. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XHTML and PNG. Think mission-critical. Think web-enabled. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for architecting. The metrics for TQC reports are more well-understood if they are not back-end.