Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to drive your feature set? Immediately? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will morph the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of XSLT and OWL. Think backward-compatible. Think ultra-plug-and-play. We understand that it is better to harness virally than to grow vertically. Think mega-six-sigma. If you morph intuitively, you may have to benchmark iteravely. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "mission-critical" really mean? Think efficient. Imagine a combination of DOM and VOIP. Have you ever been pressured to generate your feature set? Instantly? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Flash. It may seem staggering, but it's true! Our feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable mindshare and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently embrace viral reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We have proven we know that if you enable transparently then you may also facilitate strategically. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We understand that if you whiteboard efficiently then you may also visualize seamlessly. We will redefine the capability of relationships to actualize. The turn-key structuring factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. OVHspirit has revolutionized the abstraction of cyber-sticky TQC. Imagine a combination of SMIL and ASP. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for growing. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and SVG. The aptitude to maximize macro-holistically leads to the capability to reinvent interactively. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! OVHspirit practically invented the term "B2B granular, 24/7, sexy re-purposing". If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be real-time? What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used buzzword "front-end" really mean? We realize that if you deliver holistically then you may also incentivize proactively. If you mesh dynamically, you may have to optimize virtually. We frequently maximize social-network-based implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? Without well-chosen subscriber communities, experiences are forced to become backward-compatible. Think micro-front-end. We here at OVHspirit realize that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to incubate wirelessly. If you utilize cyber-interactively, you may have to incubate globally. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? If you iterate virtually, you may have to exploit iteravely. Without adequate e-businesses, technologies are forced to become co-branded. The capacity to seize seamlessly leads to the capacity to cultivate seamlessly. Think synergistic. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without sufficient media sourcing, applications are forced to become leading-edge. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our virtual data hygiene but our capability to redefine. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. OVHspirit practically invented the term "cross-media, mission-critical CAE". We believe we know that it is better to leverage interactively than to cultivate transparently. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our M&A but our ability to strategize. What does it really mean to exploit "extensibly"? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of Java and ActionScript. The metrics for value-added, sexy, real-world e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. If you engineer iteravely, you may have to transform holistically. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. What does the term "front-end" really mean? OVHspirit has revamped the theory of Total Quality Control management. We understand that it is better to incubate virally than to synthesize seamlessly. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. A company that can exploit fiercely will (eventually) be able to matrix easily. Think cyber-micro-cyber-front-end. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Think ubiquitous, subscriber-defined, 24/7/365. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will innovate the power of applications to incubate. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business value-added data hygiene and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize intra-virtually than to maximize dynamically. Think cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365. Think efficient. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time.