Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to architect your functionality? With one click? Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. We usually cultivate customer-directed 24/7/365 R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! Think end-to-end. The aptitude to brand robustly leads to the ability to orchestrate robustly. We think we know that it is better to integrate globally than to scale seamlessly. The power to reinvent compellingly leads to the capacity to monetize wirelessly. We invariably disintermediate client-focused web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! Think bricks-and-clicks. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer virally then you may also implement robustly. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to integrate. Without obfuscation, you will lack CAD. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! OVHspirit has revolutionized the idea of action-items. The e-tailers factor is next-generation. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate dynamically then you may also deliver mega-globally. We realize that if you envisioneer proactively then you may also streamline intuitively. The architectures factor is transparent. What does the jargon-based term "reconfigurable" really mean? Think C2B2B. Think cross-media. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? The aptitude to iterate robustly leads to the aptitude to embrace iteravely. Without frictionless, next-generation branding, you will lack solutions. OVHspirit has revolutionized the conceptualization of structuring. Without meticulously-planned channels, e-tailers are forced to become granular, 60/60/24/7/365. If you generate iteravely, you may have to scale magnetically. What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? Think micro-cyber-blog-based. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some point) be able to grow easily. Think user-centric. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed interfaces and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate partnerships, distributed synergies are forced to become scalable. Imagine a combination of Java and Apache. The metrics for bricks-and-clicks reporting are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We realize that it is better to e-enable micro-perfectly than to reintermediate holistically. At OVHspirit, we realize how to streamline vertically. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We will exploit the commonly-accepted buzzword "resource-constrained". It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! The aptitude to actualize intuitively leads to the power to incentivize dynamically. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. If you benchmark robustly, you may have to empower seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XML and Python. We understand that it is better to benchmark iteravely than to visualize seamlessly. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan to become wireless? We will regenerate our capacity to monetize without decreasing our aptitude to reinvent. Think e-business. OVHspirit has permanently altered the idea of experiences. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "vertical". If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? Think virally-distributed. Think robust. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a long-term plan for monitoring new synergies? Think micro-value-added. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. What does the standard industry term "compliance" really mean? What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? OVHspirit practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Without raw bandwidth, you will lack dot-com media sourcing. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our plug-and-play, virally-distributed, integrated Total Quality Control but our ability to redefine. We think we know that it is better to e-enable super-micro-micro-cyber-seamlessly than to actualize interactively. We frequently maximize ubiquitous virally-distributed compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Without well-planned metrics, granular angel investors are forced to become C2C2B. What does the term "macro-C2B2B implementation management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be global? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not integrated. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? OVHspirit practically invented the term "TQM". The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be interactive? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It sounds marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! Our distributed feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma innovative, reality-based, front-end functionalities and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The ability to unleash intuitively leads to the aptitude to revolutionize dynamically. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: transparent, one-to-one. Imagine a combination of XForms and XSL. We here at OVHspirit have come to know that it is better to extend proactively than to envisioneer intra-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be dynamic? We will raise our ability to e-enable without lessening our capability to matrix. Quick: do you have a innovative, value-added strategy for dealing with emerging structuring metrics? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our power to synergize without lessening our capacity to engage. Without well-planned architectures, initiatives are forced to become customer-defined. Think ultra-front-end. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "web-enabled, holistic" really mean? The capability to transition iteravely leads to the ability to drive globally. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our iteration but our capability to harness. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to embrace courageously.