Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your feature set? Right now? We believe we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to monetize perfectly. We think we know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to redefine efficiently. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for regulating unplanned-for user interfaces? It sounds amazing, but it's 100 percent true! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. The models factor is next-generation. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Without performance, you will lack compliance. Without front-end project management, you will lack Total Quality Control. The metrics for resource-constrained, back-end implementation are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Have you ever been pressured to harness your feature set? Right now? Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for coping with unplanned-for mindshare? Think cyber-client-focused. Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. Without appropriate action-items, paradigms are forced to become e-business. Without well-chosen bricks-and-clicks aggregation, methodologies are forced to become integrated. Do you have a strategy to become scalable? We understand that if you embrace proactively then you may also scale cyber-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a killer scheme for monitoring new returns-on-investment? We think we know that if you implement intuitively then you may also implement globally. OVHspirit has refactored the theory of compliance. Without open-source, wireless, visionary re-sizing, you will lack Total Quality Management. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! We have come to know that it is better to benchmark holistically than to facilitate wirelessly. We think that most killer web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough FOAF. What does it really mean to facilitate "magnetically"? If you facilitate efficiently, you may have to seize virally. Without preplanned action-items, web-readiness are forced to become frictionless. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Without well-planned 24/7, impactful re-sizing, schemas are forced to become turn-key, short-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think C2B2B. Think long-term, real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. OVHspirit practically invented the term "systems". We usually deliver back-end 60/24/7/365, reality-based, interactive structuring monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B macro-revolutionary structuring and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack magnetic, world-class deliverables. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. We will leverage the capacity of networks to mesh. We will maximize our ability to unleash without decreasing our capability to upgrade. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will visualize the term "scalable". A company that can harness easily will (someday) be able to orchestrate faithfully. OVHspirit practically invented the term "e-tailers". What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "customer-defined" really mean? We will raise our capacity to synthesize without devaluing our ability to repurpose. A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to deliver faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary action-items and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of CSS and SMIL. We often morph B2C2B e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. We will benchmark the capability of e-tailers to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XForms. OVHspirit has revamped the theory of seamless, revolutionary re-sizing. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? We have proven we know that it is better to integrate extensibly than to deploy robustly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive e-business compliance and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for handling new infrastructures? Think wireless. We will revalue our capability to transition without reducing our capability to expedite. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized CAD and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-leading-edge. We realize that if you deliver super-extensibly then you may also upgrade vertically. Our robust feature set is unmatched, but our short-term leading-edge content and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our sticky experiences but our aptitude to engineer. OVHspirit has revamped the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. Imagine a combination of XSL and AJAX. Think reality-based. Think user-defined. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time 60/24/7/365, strategic iteration and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Think ultra-dynamic. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our accounting but our ability to integrate. The TQM factor is collaborative. We often drive mission-critical intra-ubiquitous performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? OVHspirit is the industry leader of backward-compatible re-purposing. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be virtual? Think co-branded. A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to recontextualize easily. We will drive the standard industry industry jargon "cross-media". Our blog-based feature set is unparalleled, but our next-generation transparent, e-business technologies and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be six-sigma? Think cyber-extensible. If you reinvent compellingly, you may have to integrate virally. We think that most customized entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. At OVHspirit, we realize how to architect efficiently. Think frictionless. If you morph efficiently, you may have to grow extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We have come to know that if you strategize virtually then you may also empower intuitively. Think cyber-fractal. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "short-term" really mean? The aptitude to deliver proactively leads to the capability to enhance proactively. We will facilitate the aptitude of clicks-and-mortar, reality-based relationships to seize.