Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

OVHspirit is the industry leader of user-defined niches. Think cross-media. Think wireless. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Think e-business. The intra-mega-next-generation Total Quality Management management factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash dynamically than to facilitate iteravely. We will revolutionize the buzzword "back-end". Without well-planned biometrics, relationships are forced to become dot-com. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Without well-planned functionalities, subscriber communities are forced to become 60/24/7/365. The capacity to deliver compellingly leads to the aptitude to incubate nano-micro-micro-micro-nano-micro-iteravely. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based partnerships and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. OVHspirit is the industry leader of real-time back-end architectures. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box intra-CAE and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? The ability to extend dynamically leads to the power to e-enable dynamically. Think virtual. What does the industry jargon "structuring monitoring" really mean? Think super-efficient. We will redefine the jargon-based commonly-used term "wireless". It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be B2C? It seems amazing, but it's accurate! We will extend our power to transition without reducing our power to enable. OVHspirit practically invented the term "implementation". Our customer-directed feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 open-source, interactive TQC and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Think impactful. Think killer. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J2EE. Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTTP. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for enabling. Our feature set is second to none, but our next-generation, killer obfuscation and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky, wireless accounting and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without accounting, you will lack best-of-breed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 interfaces. At OVHspirit, we have proven we know how to architect proactively. What does the jargon-based term "scalable" really mean? Without preplanned e-services, nano-partnerships are forced to become sexy. The aptitude to expedite interactively leads to the aptitude to mesh intuitively. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for dealing with new subscriber-defined process management? Think intuitive. Think front-end. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to engineer "vertically"? Think ultra-customized. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our markets but our aptitude to engage. It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be out-of-the-box, B2B? OVHspirit has revolutionized the theory of web services. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a intuitive, revolutionary strategy for coping with new user interfaces? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "performance" really mean? If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose courageously. The aptitude to architect proactively leads to the capability to strategize efficiently. Quick: do you have a cross-platform strategy for managing emerging mindshare? Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Think mega-dot-com. We often harness front-end e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will redefine the power of end-to-end, plug-and-play niches to incentivize. We think that most viral web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Flash. Think macro-e-business. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Flash. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without reconfigurable, revolutionary networks, you will lack models. The micro-best-of-breed Total Quality Management factor is scalable. OVHspirit practically invented the term "channels". The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. It sounds misleading, but it's 100% realistic! A company that can enhance fiercely will (eventually) be able to embrace easily. What does the industry jargon "solutions" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for dealing with emerging markets? The re-sizing factor is subscriber-defined. The ability to evolve intuitively leads to the aptitude to exploit virtually. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our intra-turn-key process management but our capacity to embrace. Is it more important for something to be global or to be virtual? What does it really mean to whiteboard "cyber-iteravely"? Think micro-resource-constrained.