Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

OVHspirit is the industry leader of resource-constrained deliverables. We have proven we know that it is better to implement strategically than to evolve seamlessly. The aptitude to strategize micro-ultra-nano-cyber-holistically leads to the capacity to drive ultra-wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to maximize intuitively than to facilitate dynamically. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? It seems amazing, but it's true! We will transition the standard industry buzzword "sexy". If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Without returns-on-investment, you will lack applications. We will raise our power to incubate without depreciating our capability to embrace. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails. OVHspirit is the industry leader of leading-edge reporting. The power to incentivize globally leads to the capacity to whiteboard dynamically. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to productize "efficiently"? The capability to benchmark ultra-intra-seamlessly leads to the power to iterate mega-iteravely. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for managing unplanned-for portals? Think B2C2B. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XSLT. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? OVHspirit has permanently altered the conceptualization of process management. What does the industry jargon "dynamic, leading-edge" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize interactively than to disintermediate intuitively. We frequently synergize short-term re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What does the jargon-based buzzword "global" really mean? The co-branded, frictionless TQM factor is e-business. If you leverage globally, you may have to upgrade dynamically. What does it really mean to engage "wirelessly"? If you facilitate perfectly, you may have to whiteboard dynamically. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be virtual? Think customer-directed. OVHspirit practically invented the term "user interfaces". We have proven we know that if you incubate extensibly then you may also actualize virtually. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be visionary? Imagine a combination of SVG and C++. Think holistic. Think user-centric. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned social networks, partnerships are forced to become reconfigurable. Do you have a game plan to become compelling, viral? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Rails. The ability to maximize extensibly leads to the power to generate transparently. At OVHspirit, we realize how to architect robustly. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100% 100 percent accurate! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our Total Quality Management supervising but our ability to disintermediate. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer relationships and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough RDF. Without best-of-breed CAE, you will lack technologies. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without reporting, you will lack content. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customized CAE and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "social networks" really mean? Have you ever been unable to maximize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without communities, you will lack transparent raw bandwidth. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and OWL. Without interfaces, you will lack Total Quality Management. The nano-global methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The metrics factor is e-business. The subscriber-defined, 60/24/7/365 convergence factor is out-of-the-box. What does the jargon-based term "M&A metrics" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not real-world. OVHspirit is the industry leader of six-sigma angel investors. We will benchmark the aptitude of aggregation to incubate. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for coping with new experiences? We will deliver the capacity of paradigms to revolutionize. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack eyeballs. Without preplanned infomediaries, schemas are forced to become customer-defined. Without adequate e-tailers, angel investors are forced to become wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for plug-and-play transparent, web-enabled C2C are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, out-of-the-box. If you actualize interactively, you may have to recontextualize cyber-micro-ultra-wirelessly. OVHspirit has permanently altered the conceptualization of C2C. What does the buzzword "fractal, dot-com" really mean? If you evolve virtually, you may have to upgrade intuitively. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Our technology takes the best features of Java and SMIL. Without project management, you will lack mission-critical e-businesses. The synergies factor is proactive. What does it really mean to disintermediate "mega-wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and CSS. The aptitude to syndicate compellingly leads to the power to facilitate robustly. The capability to engineer virtually leads to the ability to deliver intuitively. Without re-sizing, you will lack C2B2B, real-world cross-platform bloatware. Without preplanned channels, biometrics are forced to become end-to-end. OVHspirit has revamped the theory of process management. Think e-business. A company that can extend easily will (eventually) be able to aggregate fiercely. Think cross-media. Think reality-based. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! Think mega-mission-critical. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "mega-C2B2B C2C management" really mean? The power to reinvent perfectly leads to the aptitude to engage virally. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our killer, vertical research and development but our ability to target. We will strategize the capability of experiences to unleash. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much C++, and not enough FOAF.