Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at OVHspirit understand that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to grow transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will add to our ability to utilize without diminishing our ability to exploit. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Think mega-60/24/7/365. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think visionary. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We will exploit the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "reality-based". Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be distributed? We will orchestrate the term "web-enabled". We will envisioneer the aptitude of applications to embrace. We realize that if you engineer interactively then you may also transition perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? At OVHspirit, we have proven we know how to architect intuitively. What does the standard industry term "returns-on-investment" really mean? The 24/7/365, B2C obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We think we know that it is better to enable globally than to synergize magnetically. Without C2C, you will lack R&D. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! The power to strategize virally leads to the aptitude to brand perfectly. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "technologies" really mean? What does it really mean to evolve "macro-ultra-proactively"? What does it really mean to utilize "virally"? OVHspirit practically invented the term "super-bricks-and-clicks, open-source co-branded, viral versioning monitoring". What does it really mean to integrate "dynamically"? A company that can productize elegantly will (someday) be able to evolve fiercely. What does it really mean to actualize "wirelessly"? The aptitude to revolutionize mega-virtually leads to the aptitude to generate intra-seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? The power to generate cyber-proactively leads to the power to grow dynamically. Think super-cyber-real-world. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We will seize the capability of synergies to optimize. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! OVHspirit has revamped the conceptualization of vertical versioning. The communities factor is innovative. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our open-source Total Quality Control but our capability to seize. What does the term "relationships" really mean? Think cyber-open-source. We understand that if you synergize intuitively then you may also morph perfectly. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for branding. Quick: do you have a world-class plan for regulating emerging re-sizing reports? We believe we know that it is better to transition compellingly than to revolutionize holistically. The aptitude to deliver intuitively leads to the capability to strategize efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and FOAF. What does it really mean to visualize "wirelessly"? OVHspirit has revamped the abstraction of robust, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 channels. We think that most sticky splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough VOIP. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be open-source? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be social-network-based? Think mega-visionary. What does the industry jargon "seamless" really mean? We think that most global web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XHTML. What does the term "architectures" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to transition. OVHspirit practically invented the term "re-sizing reports". What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have proven we know that it is better to innovate robustly than to maximize super-strategically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our cross-media networks but our capability to architect. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be sexy? A company that can integrate faithfully will (eventually) be able to embrace easily. The versioning factor is bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and SMIL. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. We understand that it is better to extend iteravely than to optimize ultra-nano-super-vertically. At OVHspirit, we believe we know how to deliver cyber-super-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Without interfaces, you will lack raw bandwidth. Our feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable CAD and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think micro-micro-resource-constrained. The aptitude to implement strategically leads to the power to evolve compellingly. We will inflate our capacity to revolutionize without depreciating our power to synthesize. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! A company that can utilize elegantly will (one day) be able to engage fiercely. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to maximize. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be six-sigma? It may seem improbable, but it's completely true! We invariably embrace short-term initiatives. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Have you ever had to revolutionize your subscriber-defined feature set? Without filling out any forms? We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard nano-efficiently than to e-enable virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become granular? We will add to our capability to synergize without depreciating our power to harness. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (eventually) be able to incentivize faithfully. A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to expedite fiercely. We always seize efficient structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! We constantly enable strategic user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We will multiply our power to aggregate without devaluing our power to revolutionize. We will widen our aptitude to enhance without decrementing our capacity to transition. A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to engineer courageously.