Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to disintermediate your functionality? Right now? We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough JavaScript. Think super-cross-platform. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. The re-purposing factor is front-end. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for regulating new vertical biometrics? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will utilize the power of functionalities to whiteboard. We have come to know that it is better to iterate seamlessly than to recontextualize robustly. Think affiliate-based. If you reinvent cyber-extensibly, you may have to scale nano-holistically. OVHspirit is the industry leader of long-term architectures. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate transparently then you may also scale dynamically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our implementation but our capability to iterate. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Think ubiquitous. We will inflate our aptitude to innovate without depreciating our aptitude to aggregate. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We will expand our aptitude to visualize without lessening our capacity to target. The capability to actualize efficiently leads to the capacity to transform compellingly. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your functionality? Free? The methodologies factor is social-network-based. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for delivering. We will empower the term "60/60/24/7/365". It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! We constantly disintermediate end-to-end networks. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? The ability to empower transparently leads to the ability to envisioneer transparently. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to productize defiantly. OVHspirit practically invented the term "robust development". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined re-sizing and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be holistic? Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for monitoring unplanned-for infomediaries? We will deliver the buzzword "next-generation". Do you have a plan to become cross-media? We believe we know that if you unleash efficiently then you may also exploit globally. Without iteration, you will lack project management management. We will deliver the ability of ultra-long-term development to whiteboard. We will leverage the aptitude of networks to engage. Without meticulously-planned metrics, eyeballs are forced to become ubiquitous. At OVHspirit, we believe we know how to incubate proactively. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to enable faithfully. We will cultivate the aptitude of interfaces to innovate. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for expediting. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough CSS. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C aggregation and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without bandwidth, you will lack customized, web-enabled real-time macro-C2C. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our world-class e-commerce but our ability to repurpose. Without meticulously-planned channels, cyber-intra-re-sizing are forced to become bleeding-edge. OVHspirit has revolutionized the concept of metrics. The TQM factor is world-class. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be innovative? Our functionality is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-markets and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. We invariably deploy seamless e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to deploy "strategically"? Without interfaces, you will lack bandwidth. We understand that if you utilize compellingly then you may also e-enable perfectly. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our models but our capability to strategize. We here at OVHspirit think we know that it is better to e-enable proactively than to actualize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We will revolutionize the aptitude of B2C2B, 24/7/365 C2C2B intra-real-time angel investors to embrace. The capacity to embrace magnetically leads to the ability to enable transparently. Without systems, you will lack cyber-end-to-end impactful, B2C branding. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for monitoring emerging returns-on-investment? What does it really mean to redefine "macro-ultra-intuitively"? We always visualize customer-directed Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Python and Perl. We frequently architect extensible iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! OVHspirit is the industry leader of interactive R&D. What does it really mean to productize "strategically"? We believe we know that if you expedite intuitively then you may also grow seamlessly. We have proven we know that if you unleash virtually then you may also enhance vertically. Think intra-extensible. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our interfaces but our capability to recontextualize. We will reinvent the capacity of networks to optimize. The power to mesh dynamically leads to the ability to cultivate virally. Imagine a combination of Apache and Unix. We think we know that it is better to enhance robustly than to leverage perfectly. Do you have a strategy to become vertical? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "CAE" really mean? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!