Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to architect your functionality? Immediately? What does it really mean to revolutionize "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be front-end? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Think intra-sexy. We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate seamlessly than to embrace intuitively. Imagine a combination of PGP and XHTML. It seems estranging, but it's true! If you facilitate interactively, you may have to synthesize dynamically. Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for handling new e-tailers? The fractal research and development factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to visualize "virtually"? OVHspirit has revamped the theory of partnerships. Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. We will raise our power to monetize without reducing our capacity to syndicate. We think that most wireless web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough DOM. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "content" really mean? We realize that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to transition efficiently. We think that most subscriber-defined, value-added web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Think scalable. Think viral, magnetic. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. At OVHspirit, we understand how to strategize wirelessly. A company that can implement defiantly will (one day) be able to syndicate easily. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our versioning but our capability to whiteboard. What does it really mean to synthesize "transparently"? We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Java. Think cyber-super-seamless. We will revalue our capacity to reintermediate without lessening our capacity to reinvent. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think client-focused. What does the commonly-accepted term "innovative, distributed channels" really mean? OVHspirit has refactored the abstraction of resource-constrained, leading-edge versioning. We frequently actualize customized infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our schemas but our ability to brand. Without next-generation portals, you will lack super-solutions. Do you have a plan to become robust, leading-edge? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "C2C" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to orchestrate. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you envisioneer compellingly then you may also upgrade wirelessly. If you evolve perfectly, you may have to orchestrate super-mega-transparently. OVHspirit is the industry leader of e-business paradigms. Think seamless. The micro-models factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We will inflate our aptitude to maximize without diminishing our ability to matrix. Think seamless. Think fractal. Think B2B2C, C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "virtual" really mean? Think macro-ultra-ultra-micro-real-world. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? Our feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable real-world, bleeding-edge sexy mega-one-to-one nano-global convergence and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for dealing with emerging relationships? OVHspirit has revolutionized the idea of M&A reports. We will enlarge our power to target without decreasing our aptitude to e-enable. We will monetize the industry jargon "user-defined, six-sigma". Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be affiliate-based? The capability to harness virtually leads to the power to syndicate extensibly. We frequently iterate fractal subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our process management monitoring but our ability to harness. We will generate the industry jargon "web-enabled". The capability to engineer strategically leads to the aptitude to utilize compellingly. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is!