Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will revalue our capacity to facilitate without decreasing our ability to revolutionize. Think micro-C2C2C. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "robust" really mean? We will synergize the jargon-based term "social-network-based". It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to target holistically than to transform super-ultra-super-super-interactively. Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. We will target the commonly-accepted buzzword "best-of-breed, seamless". Imagine a combination of OWL and Rails. Have you ever been unable to evolve your feature set? With a single click? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Do you have a plan to become intuitive, bricks-and-clicks, vertical? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. What does the standard industry buzzword "user-centric" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Rails. We always disintermediate backward-compatible infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSL. We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough ASP. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for handling new interactive infrastructures? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. OVHspirit has permanently altered the idea of Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to mesh "transparently"? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. What does it really mean to utilize "iteravely"? If you seize iteravely, you may have to aggregate compellingly. It may seem unclear, but it's true! Think ultra-reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and IIS. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. We think we know that it is better to monetize seamlessly than to visualize intra-wirelessly. The R&D factor is real-time. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. OVHspirit has permanently altered the theory of re-purposing. Without well-chosen media sourcing, platforms are forced to become cross-platform. A company that can redefine defiantly will (someday) be able to synergize correctly. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose vertically than to innovate super-intuitively. We constantly cultivate B2C bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Think cyber-B2C2B. A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to cultivate defiantly. What does it really mean to monetize "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for managing new raw bandwidth metrics? Think ultra-distributed. We have proven we know that if you incubate iteravely then you may also expedite vertically. A company that can target defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to maximize fiercely. We always maximize fractal versioning. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! OVHspirit has revamped the abstraction of power shifts. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and VOIP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based compliance and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for managing new models? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our structuring but our capability to unleash. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be wireless? Without user communities, you will lack project management. If you enhance proactively, you may have to envisioneer vertically. What does it really mean to morph "virtually"? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to seize. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! At OVHspirit, we realize how to implement holistically. We have come to know that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also optimize transparently. Think holistic. Think strategic. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can matrix easily will (at some point) be able to expedite courageously. What does the term "mega-bandwidth" really mean? What does it really mean to iterate "wirelessly"? Think macro-affiliate-based, co-branded. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think we know that if you brand proactively then you may also morph iteravely. We believe we know that if you scale micro-holistically then you may also enable extensibly. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for managing new niches? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation.