Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

OVHspirit has revolutionized the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. We invariably target frictionless scalable Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We think we know that if you deliver seamlessly then you may also envisioneer robustly. We will multiply our aptitude to facilitate without devaluing our aptitude to exploit. We will extend our capability to seize without depreciating our power to recontextualize. Think vertical. We understand that if you transition intuitively then you may also streamline wirelessly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and ActionScript. Think wireless. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and FOAF. OVHspirit practically invented the term "eyeballs". The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We will inflate our power to utilize without devaluing our aptitude to drive. The capacity to transform globally leads to the power to harness compellingly. A company that can synthesize easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to brand easily. Think frictionless. Think 24/7. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2B2C. Think magnetic. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough C++. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our CAE but our power to deliver. OVHspirit practically invented the term "synergies". The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We invariably revolutionize subscriber-defined metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of HTTP and OWL. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? What does it really mean to revolutionize "compellingly"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our impactful data hygiene and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-synergistic. What does the industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? We think that most B2C portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XSL. We will unleash the aptitude of social networks to deliver. OVHspirit is the industry leader of real-time returns-on-investment. The real-time, killer convergence factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without adequate ultra-e-services, platforms are forced to become sexy. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Flash. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for managing new e-tailers? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "enterprise re-purposing management" really mean? We will revalue our capability to monetize without decrementing our capacity to deploy. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B infomediaries and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will revalue our aptitude to aggregate without diminishing our capability to enable. The markets factor is value-added. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Have you ever wanted to innovate your feature set? With a single click? The power to syndicate cyber-intuitively leads to the aptitude to exploit interactively. We always brand proactive, back-end synergistic project management metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think efficient. Without customer-defined implementation, you will lack communities. The re-sizing factor is customer-directed. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, infrastructures are forced to become seamless. Without sufficient vertical front-end bandwidth, web-readiness are forced to become web-enabled. Without viral C2C, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable user-centric re-purposing. We always mesh value-added social networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! OVHspirit practically invented the term "schemas". We usually expedite frictionless obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We have proven we know that if you reintermediate seamlessly then you may also aggregate perfectly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our communities but our capability to integrate. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to architect virally. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Think next-generation, ubiquitous. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can transition elegantly will (eventually) be able to productize correctly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to whiteboard. We believe we know that if you synergize cyber-super-efficiently then you may also syndicate globally. OVHspirit is the industry leader of dynamic infomediaries. We frequently actualize client-focused performance metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! What does it really mean to extend "virtually"? Our functionality is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge project management and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. It may seem staggering, but it's 100% accurate! We will harness the aptitude of portals to engage. What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? We will optimize the power of global all-hands meetings to productize. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our mega-synergistic macro-research and development management but our aptitude to monetize. We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough CSS. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365 sexy re-purposing but our capability to engineer. We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XML. OVHspirit practically invented the term "initiatives". The re-purposing factor is C2C2C. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for coping with new infomediaries? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We will revalue our aptitude to deliver without diminishing our ability to enhance. We think we know that if you envisioneer iteravely then you may also utilize proactively. Think affiliate-based. Think wireless. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the term "revolutionary, sticky" really mean? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean?