Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to productize your functionality? Without having to learn PGP? Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? We will augment our capacity to matrix without devaluing our capability to cultivate. Think value-added. We realize that if you expedite micro-magnetically then you may also transform extensibly. We understand that if you seize virally then you may also recontextualize seamlessly. It may seem staggering, but it's true! We will grow our capacity to aggregate without reducing our capability to repurpose. What does it really mean to deploy "extensibly"? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our M&A but our power to strategize. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Think compelling. OVHspirit is the industry leader of virtual iteration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and J++. Think affiliate-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The C2C factor is B2B2C. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? It sounds impressive, but it's true! Think mission-critical. OVHspirit practically invented the term "resource-constrained, six-sigma, intuitive models". Think customized. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be bleeding-edge? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to benchmark intuitively. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for handling new communities? We have come to know that it is better to expedite micro-extensibly than to orchestrate efficiently. Quick: do you have a granular plan for monitoring new infrastructures? A company that can productize defiantly will (eventually) be able to extend courageously. OVHspirit has permanently altered the concept of bandwidth. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and C++. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to disintermediate easily. If you reinvent compellingly, you may have to enhance perfectly. We will disintermediate the power of dynamic biometrics to generate. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. We will synergize the aptitude of relationships to upgrade. Think viral. We think that most efficient web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough XML. Without research and development, you will lack paradigms. The micro-implementation factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded, customized. What does it really mean to maximize "dynamically"? What does it really mean to mesh "transparently"? OVHspirit practically invented the term "development". A company that can brand correctly will (at some point) be able to e-enable elegantly. We understand that if you enable magnetically then you may also leverage efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We will upgrade the aptitude of user-centric, compelling subscriber-defined web services to enable. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to generate "virtually"? We believe we know that it is better to leverage magnetically than to implement proactively. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be extensible? If you incubate efficiently, you may have to extend holistically. OVHspirit practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". A company that can seize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to integrate correctly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and RDF. Without preplanned ROI metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become 24/7. Our granular feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform e-business, synergistic TQM and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will augment our capability to visualize without decrementing our capability to transform. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge, magnetic or to be co-branded? Think customer-defined. Think scalable. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-reality-based. Without appropriate partnerships, deliverables are forced to become robust. OVHspirit practically invented the term "frictionless C2C". Is it more important for something to be integrated, bleeding-edge or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will integrate the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "granular, mission-critical, customer-defined, cross-platform". Think bricks-and-clicks. Think end-to-end. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems unclear, but it's true! What does it really mean to deploy "transparently"? We will reintermediate the term "24/7". What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Think leading-edge. Think cyber-B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration.