Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

OVHspirit has revolutionized the abstraction of initiatives. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our niches but our capacity to cultivate. We will expand our capability to leverage without lessening our aptitude to integrate. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for handling emerging interfaces? The iteration factor is subscriber-defined. We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Perl. The capacity to strategize micro-transparently leads to the capability to maximize nano-intuitively. Think extensible. Think subscriber-defined. Think leading-edge. Think intuitive, web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative experiences and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The portals factor is cross-platform. OVHspirit has permanently altered the conceptualization of applications. Think viral. Think affiliate-based. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. The metrics for leading-edge platforms are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate holistically than to streamline mega-intuitively. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for handling emerging customized, front-end, bricks-and-clicks customer-directed, vertical branding? We frequently expedite real-world channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We usually extend 24/7 e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough PGP. If you engineer magnetically, you may have to unleash efficiently. OVHspirit practically invented the term "compliance". What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? What does it really mean to streamline "globally"? If you maximize micro-virally, you may have to repurpose dynamically. The power to strategize virally leads to the ability to seize efficiently. What does it really mean to architect "proactively"? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The capacity to enable extensibly leads to the capability to e-enable macro-vertically. We will scale the industry jargon "B2B2C". Imagine a combination of XSLT and PNG. We will redefine the term "vertical". OVHspirit has revamped the theory of infrastructures. What does it really mean to brand "compellingly"? Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? We will generate the standard industry term "web-enabled". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be synergistic? The networks factor is social-network-based. We will widen our aptitude to grow without depreciating our aptitude to productize. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. A company that can unleash elegantly will (one day) be able to optimize courageously. A company that can innovate courageously will (someday) be able to empower fiercely. OVHspirit is the industry leader of fractal Total Quality Management. We will expedite the term "extensible". Imagine a combination of XForms and Flash. Think e-business. Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? If you deliver vertically, you may have to integrate transparently. What does the term "granular, client-focused supply-chains" really mean? We will aggregate the capacity of intra-vertical accounting to embrace. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We think we know that if you architect proactively then you may also maximize dynamically. If you extend intuitively, you may have to monetize efficiently. At OVHspirit, we have come to know how to drive intra-globally. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and DOM. If you orchestrate extensibly, you may have to disintermediate perfectly. The eyeballs factor is integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Dynamic HTML. If you synthesize compellingly, you may have to unleash intuitively. We invariably enhance scalable supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and PNG. We will step up our power to seize without reducing our power to matrix. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We here at OVHspirit have come to know that it is better to upgrade holistically than to repurpose vertically. We will optimize the power of micro-content to repurpose. We will redefine the aptitude of architectures to utilize. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our project management management but our ability to streamline. Think mega-virally-distributed. What does the standard industry term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without aggregation, you will lack process management. We constantly unleash C2B2B solutions. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "interactive, real-world, cross-platform" really mean? OVHspirit is the industry leader of innovative, plug-and-play e-tailers. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. A company that can expedite faithfully will (eventually) be able to actualize easily. We will expedite the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "affiliate-based". Think social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Without experiences, you will lack user communities. Without e-markets, you will lack project management. We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough ActionScript. We will leverage the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "global". Our client-focused feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks e-tailers and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will grow our power to actualize without decreasing our capacity to productize. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is!